supermegashow - EP 264 - Penis Mike

Episode Date: September 29, 2021

Matt got the rona, Ryan picks out some fashionable glasses for his buddy, and the guys are joined by the legendary Penis Mike, who gets the pleasure of speaking with Matt’s parents. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit angie.com that's a-n-g-i.com of course no no no nothing's wrong with that if he likes to suck some cock let him suck some cock how weird would it have been if that was an episode if he wants to suck cock let him suck cock dude i'm just like thinking about jerry seinfeld again dating that was it high school 17 year old i'm just like what if what if like he just started dating me when i was fresh when i was still in

high school at 17 like you would have loved it and you know it I would have laughed what you would have said no Ryan we would have had so many laughs yeah you would have had a ton of laughs together you guys would have just been fucking two peas in a pod your skin is so smooth and young that's incredible god it's almost like while i was on television you were in the in the womb what's up with that i i always i always forget that about jerry seinfeld the fact that he dated a 17 and brought her to the fucking red carpet it's one of my favorite uh moments of a let's play we did was uh in resident evil 2 when we're doing the j Seinfeld thing where it's like your daughter brings home her boyfriend. It's Jerry fucking Seinfeld. I'm just making sure.

Yep. While still a 17-year-old high school student, she met then 38-year-old Jerry Seinfeld in a public park. In a public park. Did he catcall her at a public park? Was he like, hey, mama. Get over here, girl. They talk about like when i think of a park i

think of like a pedophile in a trench coat like looking for kids so the fact they met in a see i picture i picture jerry seinfeld at 38 he has like a nice hat on his back is like craned a little because of his age he has glasses on he has like a bag of breadcrumbs that he's thrown to the pigeons she's on the fucking monkey bars oh my god are you jerry my parents used to love you well now they're gonna love me even more i'm dating their daughter and that's how he started dating he just announced it and then it's okay i'm looking at jerry seinfeld's facebook page no fucking wikipedia Wikipedia. Episode 264. Woo! 264, baby. Mm-hmm.

That's a lot of episodes. It is a lot of episodes. Jerome Allen Seinfeld. That's his name. His name is Jerome? Jerome. Jerome. My Hollywood name's...

Hey, Jerome. Oh, please, call me Jerry. Jerome? Okay, let's see. He, please call me Jerry. Jerome? Okay, let's see. He almost let me have a sip of his brew. Yeah, dude, that's crazy that he did. He didn't, though. Hey, look at this.

Wait, I think we should talk about the elephant in the room. Oh, yeah. Your mom's visiting. Fuck you! Fuck you! She is visiting this week. Her and my cousin Jamie Your mom's visiting. Fuck you! Fuck you! She is visiting this week. Her and my cousin Jamie, they're visiting. But not yet.

They're not here yet. In fact, no one's in my house. You know why? Because, do you want me to say it or are you going to? Drum roll. Yep. You're adding it. Your boy Matthew has COVID-19.

We're proud of you, buddy. We're so proud. We never thought you'd make it. You're in the spotlight, baby. I never thought I would be so lucky to get COVID-19. This is why you moved to LA. This is why you moved here, buddy. It is to catch a disease during the pandemic.

How's it been, though? So what is your experience with COVID first thing? It's pretty epic. My experience with COVID is basically because I'm vaccinated, I don't really have any symptoms. So it's pretty mild, pretty mild symptoms. You sent me a video you said you were coughing up blood or something well i i coughed up a couple gallons of blood earlier but i don't think that but your body produces so much you know yeah a little blood loss doesn't

hurt anybody a little blood loss never hurt anybody actually um yeah but but it's been fine. You know, I'm kind of congested. I have a bit of a cough. And that's about it, though. Just fatigue. And so I might sound a little scruffy. But, yeah, I can say it on here because no one can cut me down that I was given COVID by Jackson Tucker. You're living your truth yeah i'm living my truth right now he would question actually actually should i call him right now to debate

this he's not gonna admit it he probably won't even answer his phone don't let him know that i am on the other end of the line i just want to hear no y'all's conversation no that's that's that's evil i i there's no way it wasn't him though because basically he had it and his girlfriend got it and i got it after spending the weekend with them and the the week leading up to that they went to san diego and they were going out to bars and stuff and they got all their symptoms and everything days before I did. So it's like two and two together. I wasn't going out or anything. So it's like, I don't know how

because he suggested that I gave it to him. I was like, Jackson. Jackson? Hey, Jackson. Hey, Ryan. Oh, wait. How do I get Matt's voice so you can hear him? Hey, buddy. We're recording the podcast. If I yell loud enough through the headphones, he. Let me... How do I get Matt's voice so you can hear him? Hey, buddy.

We're recording the podcast. If I yell loud enough through the headphones, he can hear me. Hey, buddy. Wait. Output device. Hey, bro. Speakers. Are you on speakers?

Oh, wait. I can hear him. You can hear him? Hey, buddy. You might be... You might... It's going to be a weird thing for the podcast. Might be a slight echo. But we were here trying to track down where this COVID came from.

Yeah, I mean, it's a mystery, man. See, we think that you're ground zero. You're the first case to ever happen. Oh, I mean, that's a big trip. Started the pandemic. About a year and a half ago is when you got it and it lied dormant.

I actually got it a few years ago when I had a layover in Beijing and it's just been kind of chilling. Also, wait, wait, wait. Can you ask Jackson a question real quick? Ask him yourself. jackson are the glasses you have six dough from i buy direct square mellow yellow eyeglasses wait what never mind he said are your eyeglasses six oh melon something six dough wait what six dough

the name of the style, I guess. I don't know. He doesn't know. Damn it. Well, how are you feeling, Jackson? Well, my sense of smell is coming back bit by bit. Not taste? No, I never really lost my taste, only smell.

Damn. So you really lost My taste was dulled a bit, but my smell... So you really lost your sense of taste and smell? What? So you lost your sense of taste and smell? Mostly smell, not taste. Yeah. Damn. My taste was dulled by not being able to smell, but...

The smelling was wild, though, because it was nothing to do with congestion. I could smell things perfectly, or inhale through my nose perfectly, but um i the smelling was wild though because like it was nothing to do with congestion like i could smell things perfectly or like you know inhale through my nose perfectly but i couldn't smell a thing and like i was yeah with phantom sense of like the weirdest things like mustard or dirt or blood or like yes so weird yes i i had similar experiences to you, Jackson, because like I didn't lose my sense of taste or smell. But what happened was what happened was I kept smelling like deep in my nose. Like it didn't even exist. Like it wasn't a real smell, but I could smell it where I'd randomly get this like for like a split second.

Like this is weird smell in my nose that almost smelled like sewage. It's so weird. It was nasty. And then also I would randomly like my mouth would get really sour and things would taste. I had pizza the other night and it was really sour. Oh, I didn't get that. Because it was like

my taste just things tasted different. I'd be in the shower with like the Dr. Bronner's to my nose and, like, seeing if I could smell anything. And there was just nothing. Really? It was that bad? Yeah. It was subtle because, like, at first, like, you know, it was partial bit by bit.

So at first I thought it was just like, oh, this food I'm eating right now just isn't very seasoned or something like that. And then I was just like, oh, no. Right. I can't smell shit. What happened to... Right to my nose and nothing damn yeah so right when I woke up every morning I could not

taste or smell at all and I figured that out because in classic Matt Watson fashion I woke up at like 4am to eat a Kit Kat bar that I had stored next to my bed just for that occasion I really set it next to my bed just for that because I was like. I really set it next to my bed just for

that because I was like, I know I'm going to wake up and fucking love this. Do you not eat Oreos anymore, buddy? Nah, dude, that was like a one-time thing. You've moved on? Do you have like onesie pajamas on? Yeah, I'm a changed man, Ryan. But I was eating it and I could not taste it at all.

I could just feel the texture and then I tried to smell it and couldn't smell it. And that would happen every morning until like five minutes after I woke up. So I don't know. Interesting. But you know how it would be. Hey, Jackson. But now I... Jackson.

Jackson. Did you just... Was that were you were you relieving yourself he was just he was just releasing a little piddle matt i don't know oh was he going pp yeah i didn't hear that no it picked up i can't hear him that well okay because i can't hear him that well because he's coming through the phone on speaker phone and then through discord into my ears so i can't really hear him that well uh but was he he's making a little pee pee he made a little piddle but with that but i think with that we should uh wish you a happy recovery as well jack speedy recovery buddy

of course of course i know you've been waiting for it. I love you. What did he say? Matt says I love you. I love you, Jackson. Tell him he's a good boss. Okay, I will. What did he say?

See ya. See ya. I couldn't hear it. He's breaking up. He said tell him you're a good boss. Aw, thank you. That's so sweet, Jackson. Thank you he's jackson is left of the building good jackson is left the chat farewell i uh i he is ground zero though for sure did he deny it i couldn't hear um uh i don't think he i think he agreed that he was the first ever one to get it

remember he said he got it back. Carson even jumped in and was like, in the group checks, he's like, dude, you can be asymptomatic. Implying that I was just asymptomatic and gave it to Jackson. Well, I didn't get it. Yeah, okay, so here's the funny thing. Superior jeans, Matthew Watson. Superior jeans. Ha ha! get it so yeah okay so here's the funny thing i had superior jeans matthew watson superior jeans well i wear levi's um i came into work last tuesday and i had covet at the time without

knowing because i had no symptoms and we were we recorded that we recorded a podcast that day, the last podcast that came out, 263. And on that episode, I'm smoking upon my penis colored vape, my penis colored vape. And we're making comments on it. And you say, oh, what flavor is that? Let me try. I toss it to you. And you can actually hear the moment Ryan sucks upon my vape. And that was the moment that I transferred COVID germs into Ryan's mouth, but his genes defeated it. So if he was weaker, that would have been the moment that he got COVID.

And we went out to dinner that night with Ian from Smosh. And he took a sip out of my beverage and was like, you're not sick, are you? And I was like, yeah, I am without realizing I actually was. you're not sick, are you? And I was like, ha ha ha, yeah, I am, without realizing I actually was. So I was just thinking to myself, Ian was like my childhood hero, right? He was like my icon.

So if I ended up, if he got it from me and then died, and I killed my childhood hero. That would be incredible, because you would be associated with him forever then. I know, I'd be on his Wikipedia page, dude. I'd be like wow look at that i killed i killed ian from smosh it's like uh i guess i guess he lost this year's food battle oh and uh okay so i got tested i don't know why i got tested the day after but i got tested for being a dumbass i got i got the the the covid test to see if i got it so i got it on the 22nd

took another one on the 26th and i took another one earlier today all have come out negative and so it's been oh then you got your new one yeah it's all negative um so you're good yeah so i'm good i even asked them i'm like so if my last one was negative and this one is negative which was which now it's seven days after. Yeah, it's been a week. So it would show up. Fuck yeah, dude. So I'm actually surprised.

I'm shocked you didn't get it. Me too. I was expecting it. It was mainly the vape thing. I really thought that taking a hit out of your penis colored vape would have done me in. My spit was on that. And you literally, you that and you literally you know well you know what a possibility you blew into it which means you could have shed the virus

you you might have not have been shedding the virus then well yeah what i'm thinking is this that was on tuesday and when i saw jackson wednesday didn't you yeah i tested positive wednesday but when i saw jackson for the time, it was Friday, that Friday before, so I could have gotten it that Friday and then my Tuesday not be contagious anymore. True, but your symptoms came after Tuesday as well. Right. My first symptoms started Wednesday morning at 4 a.m.

I woke up with a really bad headache. And then that was... So, you took the vaccine and you still got covid yep i like how did that work oh yeah but very very good vaccine but now what's their argument for me you know oh well you see you prove that the vaccine works i prove that it doesn't see i'm the effective i'm one of the effective cases well you prove that it works because your symptoms weren't fucking awful even though a lot of this yeah well that's the thing is it's like younger people like a vaccine doesn't like mean you're not like you're fully immune especially with delta uh because when

they made the vaccine delta wasn't a thing yet. And Delta is very, and Delta exists because people won't get vaccinated. And as long as people don't get vaccinated, there's going to be more and more variants, which are going to be deadlier and more contagious and easy to get around vaccines. So thank you, everybody who's not getting vaccinated.

You're really pulling one for the team. It's really just to protect yourself from major symptoms it's important it's it's i would say it's definitely important for everyone too but it's more it's more important for the like older people the people with pre-existing conditions just people who would be affected by um the to help other people yeah it's like you know it's it's uh and also like people like i don't know what they put in the vaccine it's like i saw a tweet that was like you don't know what they put in tylenol you don't know what they put in a big mac but you still like take it you still eat it like you don't know what anyone puts in pretty much anything unless you're growing your own lettuce

and like primarily eating that and pulling your water from a well well it's also not surprising that you two like um like got it because you were around each other each other for three solid days it wasn't just like a meeting of a few hours or a couple hours it was like three solid days of being in the same environment so like i think because we went to uh we went to an airbnb in joshua tree i'd never been to joshua tree and i got a new telescope so i went out there uh with jackson and bella uh and our friend to go uh just like you know have a nice little getaway because i hadn't i hadn't hung out with jackson in a very long time like we just hadn't really just seen each other at work and

that was it so uh it was it was nice uh but i got covid i saw people speculating uh no my mom was not around like work or anything like that, so she didn't come in contact. You sure about that, Ryan? Well, I mean, there was this time I couldn't find her in the house for about two hours, but then she just appeared back in the guest room. That wasn't me because, you know, I'm usually three minutes and I'm done. Yeah. So that time wasn't for me. you know, I'm usually three minutes and I'm done. Yeah.

So that time wasn't for me. Usually pump and dumper. Maybe it was Lego. I don't know. God. Oh! I am currently as we speak because I'm in my studio right now, and you are in your studio.

My studio. Miles apart. See, I call this something different. This is my den matthew this is my cave the den your lion's den yeah i don't i just don't there's not like a yours has a studio vibe mine well you haven't seen it yet since i changed it well like what you were going for even from the start like with uh you did you do soundproofing yet for the no not yet because honestly i don't think i'm going to i'd rather decorate the walls and the sound like the the layout of this room

the soundproofing would just just like get rid of uh like the the cool vibe and i wouldn't be able to decorate it also because there's a street outside my window and all my neighbors have kids like there's no way to soundproof like the windows. So the kids yelling will still come into the windows. So I'd rather just, uh, you know, keep it how it is.

And also like when I'm recording like vocals for a song, it's, you know, like you can't hear the background noise. Really. I also have a, a ice of box, which is like a tiny little recording booth uh that you stick your head inside

yeah i saw that what was that was that mr clanton that introduced that to you or who was yes miss i i went to his house once and he had one of those i'm like what the hell is that and he's like that's a this is an isovox matthew you shit all over the toilet seat matthew yeah dude he called me out i was at his house and you pooped a little on the toilet seat Matthew yeah dude he called me out I was at his house and you pooped a little on the toilet seat and didn't wipe it up well a little bit got on the floor and a little bit was on the toilet seat but it happens you know it's kind of

it happens no but that actually did happen just not with poop I peed and I guess I came in his bathroom basically and there was some on the bath mat like a big glob of just cum and he yelled at me

the new Doja Cat video came out and you just had to take a break real quick I had to but basically I dribbled a little bit by accident not my finest moment but like a drop or two had gone when I was shaking it, you know?

Yeah. Shake it once, that's fine. Shake it twice, that's okay. Shake it three times, you're playing with yourself. Anyway, I was shaking it, and I guess I missed that a drop or two had dribbled down from the bell end of my cock onto George Clanton's tile flooring right below the toilet. And I go into the other room and I sit down with his wife.

And I'm just chilling. You know, I'm talking. We're having a cocktail. I'm enjoying Lindsay's company. And I hear from the bathroom arising such a clatter. You pissed everywhere. Did you piss on the fucking floor, Matthew?

Like an angry father. And I was like, what? And he's like, you're disgusting! You pissed in my house and didn't clean it up! Come clean this! And I was like, what? And he made me go in there and clean it up. Good! He's not gonna wipe up your piss for you? He should've cleaned up my piss. I was the guest.

No, I felt, I was the guest. No, I felt, it was very embarrassing. Like, I was just embarrassed. You know? Basically, like, obviously like, I'm the one in I'm the one in the wrong here. Because you pissed on his floor. Well, I wasn't even in the wrong I guess. It was just, it was

an embarrassing accident. Yeah, you unintentionally dribbled piss onto his floor and his toilet seat. Unintentionally pissed on my friends. Wait, was it on dribbled piss onto his floor in his toilet seat. Unintentionally pissed on my friends. Wait, was it on the toilet seat or just the floor? No, it was on the floor, but not on the toilet seat. Dude, he must have been looking for that, though. He must have, like...

Dude, that's the thing, like, did he go in after me to be like, let's see if there's any piss I can find. Oh my god. Like, I just don't, you know, George i he's probably gonna hear this because he listens to our podcast no way he does listen to our podcast because every time i see him he brings some shit up that's like he's like you talked about me again that's like you telling me that that ethan from crank game plays listens to our podcast he doesn't but if he does i'm sure

he would text both of us right now to confirm that he's a good friend by listening to our podcast. He doesn't, but if he does, I'm sure he would text both of us right now to confirm that he's a good friend by listening to our content. Yeah. Kelly, I think, used to. I don't know if she still does. I doubt it. I feel like after a while of knowing us,

you'd have to just be like, yeah, I'll take them in doses. Yeah, that's how it goes, man. But yeah, George is going to probably hear this. I'm sorry for pissing on the floor you gotta stop talking about me on your damn podcast you're embarrassing me and sending all these little children after me see i don't i don't i don't see how this would be embarrassing for him you know it's more embarrassing for me exactly i i because of such a tragic error i went and done pissed on the fucking floor at at at i was a guest in his house and i pissed on the floor and i'm i'm embarrassed george so i'm sorry

if you hear this this isn't an applebee's matt you just can't go pissing on the floor i wish dude oh his house is you know i will say his house is probably on the same level as an Applebee's bathroom. What if in like Texas Roadhouse? What the hell? Or I think it was Texas Roadhouse back in the day. Oh, with the peanuts on the floor? Yeah, instead of that, they just allowed you to like pee under the table.

There's like a bucket that holds piss under the table. You just like whip your cock out of your zipper under the table and just piss while you're having a steak. That's fucking awesome, dude. Just little, like, buckets of piss. Hey, I need the pan emptied. My pan's full. It's overflowing.

Poor waitress comes around and fucking, like, has to, like, sloshing piss. You know when they spill, like, they drop the dishes? They just drop piss and it floods the entire floor. Oh, whoopsops but everyone treats it as casually as like if a kid spilled his drink no i spilled my piss whoops oh here let me help you get that up dude starts like cupping it with their palms and throwing it into the sink

oh man i love the idea of just like a restaurant where you can piss on the floor and like that's the catch it's like yeah we got great restaurant where you can piss on the floor. And like, that's the catch. It's like, yeah, we got great steak, but you could piss on the floor. Imagine the smell of that place. The combination of like cooked meats and piss. And wine. Like medium rare steak, wine and piss. And there's peanuts on the floor too.

You can. Yeah. I mean, if there's piss on the floor, too. You can... Yeah. I mean, if there's piss on the floor, there might as well be peanuts there, too. Yeah. Let them piss on the floor, man. Everyone's allowed to have a little piss on the floor. I'm actually, as we speak, I'm purchasing eyeglasses. No, you're not.

Because... Damn it. I just had to cancel my order. Thanks, Ryan. I'm getting my old... Because I've been missing my glasses for a while. Missing your glasses? I've been missing them for a while. You know my classic ones?

I miss your glasses, too. They were cute. I've been wearing the bigger hipster square lenses, you know? But remember my older ones that were a little more rounded that were brown? Yeah, your Harry Potter glasses? No, they weren't. Not those. I did order some of those, those though i want to see you in like perfectly like just round circles i'll get a pair i'll get a pair of round glasses can we vote because i like uh like the glasses that doc

ock wears in the spider-man 2 you know what i'm talking about i I'm looking at the... Yes. I'm looking at the round glasses right now. Doc Ock. Can I buy these glasses? Yeah, dude. They're just like circular glasses. Want Doc Ock Spider-Man 2 glasses? Superhero hype. Okay.

I'm on iBuyDirect, which is where I get all my glasses because they're cheap and they have like 5,000 designs in different colors. Uh, and that's where I've always got my glasses from, except for when I got them at Lin's crafters the first time. And they signed me up for some fucking credit account without my knowledge. Uh,

well, I like, I probably said yes, but I was like 19. So I didn't fucking know what I was doing. And then it ruined my credit score, put me in debt, a debt, a little debt collector came after me I'm trying to find perfectly

like the oval ones do you see these dude? and like the fucking bridge here Ryan will you go here on iBuy direct they're having a sale right now actually 50 off will you go to this website

and will you will you find me a couple pairs of glasses that you think would look real good on me okay i i would love to i would love to wear some glasses pick how do i know which ones to can you get them in any prescription uh i'll tell you my prescription. Just find me some frames and I'll add them on on my side. I'm trying to find perfectly circular ones. They don't make that many. I'm trying to find small just perfect circles. Oh, dude.

These are fucking Nagoya. Look at these. Let me send you Nagoya. They're just like, they look like prop Harry Potter glasses. They do? They look like, they look like the shit

you get at Party City. Yeah, they look like, like fake plastic grout. Okay, I got, I got a pair of those. I threw one of those

on my order. Because they're cheap glasses. Like, and that's why I always get a couple pairs of my classic ones. People have asked they're called saunter

now you're going to have the Ryan pair because I've got to suggest you some oh yeah? you have to wear them out one day to dinner ok whatever you pick me I promise we can go out to dinner and take some pictures together really?

yeah of course man I'm excited now remember here, I'll send you a screenshot remember uh remember these glasses i used to wear them all the time they were like my go-to glasses i'm getting those again because it's been a bit oh i like the bigger frames you like the ones that are bigger no i mean i i like any glass you choose you you look fine my brother but thank you man i do there's something about like the bigger frames or there's like i have a lot a lot of nostalgia No, I mean, any glass you choose, you look fine, my brother. Thank you, man. I do. There's something about, like, the bigger frames,

where there's, like, I have a lot of nostalgia for that look. Dude, thank you. Okay, maybe I'll wear those, too. Okay, I did find some other regular round ones that are less goofy. I wonder, I'll try round glasses. I just think they'll look goofy on me. Some people can pull them off. I'm going to get you wooden glasses. Are they called roaring? No, no no is that what you're looking at because look at look at this shit this shit literally they're like wooden circular groucho marx glasses it's my carl marx glasses

where like how can i find just i just find some good ones? And the name of them, too. I'm just trying to picture you in these. There's a try-on function where you can upload a picture of yourself. Kyoto? Let me see what these look like. Dude, it's like Randy Rainbow.

And we're going to go see him live in November. Are we? You're getting front row seats for both of us, dude. No, I'm not. You're going to get the most expensive Randy Rainbow tickets. We never did an odds are for that. Kamala. Kamala. Joe Biden.

I want to meet Joe Biden. Bring my vaccine. He's the president. Goddamn, dude. I love neoliberal musical songs. Brent Lilly. Randy Rainbow featuring Brent Lilly. Dude, did you see he made a song about Brent Lilly?

What the fuck? Brent, check this out. Brent Lilly. No, Matt, I changed my mind. I want you to get these. You have to get these. Hold up. What the fuck?

Look at these Oakleys, dude. Oh, I have to. Okay, this is the pair I want have to get these hold up fuck look at these oakley's dude okay this this is the pair i want you to get this is people aren't even gonna see these glasses dude i fucking hate this this is awful you have to those are the ones i choose this is like the try it put it show it in the podcast you can get the darker brown if you want I don't know if it helps my man no it doesn't these are literally the fucking

you know that classic picture of the woman and it says triggered like the really famous like 2015-2016 meme image that says triggered and it's like the woman like that's these glasses about Jenna it's not even possible like that's that's these glasses about jenna it's not even possible for you to need a pair of glasses more than you need these this

horn shape is that's true every outfit you wear your best one yet and the dark they got that right they got that fucking right what's it acetate what is that eight i don't know how to fucking the brown acetate acetate i don't know yeah it fucking the brown a-c-e-t-a-t acetate acetate i don't know yeah it's a type it's a material oh you know what's really weird perfect detail to add just enough intrigue and to make them even better we designed jenna with spring hinges for a comfy fit matt they might be very comfy you know what's weird ryan is that's the second time in the last three hours just today that i've heard uh someone talk about uh acetate the material can you do the try me on function dude these are yeah i'll do

i'll put that picture into the try me on let's see uh but you gotta actually get these and we need to take a nice picture out at dinner to prove that you actually did awful oh not available in this car oh i can't do the they're not available to try me on but here i can just photoshop a picture real quick okay okay let me uh let me just get a picture we're just looking at a bunch of glasses for for for for my buddy matt yeah i mean it's i'm gonna look good in these jenna glasses dude they look fucking fantastic i look like one of those guys that's like like i look like one of those male feminists on Twitter that just has the absolute worst tweets.

Okay, let me take a picture of myself real quick so I can put it on my computer and then put these glasses on. Do you know the size of them though? What if they're really tiny? They're medium. Okay. Okay, so I took a picture of myself. I'm growing my mustache, by the way, dude. Oh, dude. the size of them though like what if they're really tiny they're medium okay okay so i just i took a picture of myself i'm growing my mustache by the way dude oh dude i can't wait to see it

uh in four years dude okay let's see i just pranked you bro yeah you didn't it wasn't very funny man that kind of hurt my feelings just to be honest sorry i'll i'll here let me soothe you during the ad reads. Okay, thanks, man. Rub my back while I... And when we're back from the sponsor break, we're going to... All you people that are watching on YouTube can go see what I look like

with this fantastic pair of spectacles. Yep. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start.

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Try the roasted red pepper and Swiss or caramelized onion and parmesan pinwheels only at Tim's. At participating restaurants in Canada for a limited time. We're back. Ryan, dude, these are the worst fucking glasses. Send me in Discord. I want to see it because the fans get to see it. Yeah. And I'll get to see it in person.

I'll put it on screen the same time you get to see it so everybody gets the same. Hold on, let me just add a little bit of a drop shadow so they stand out of my face a little bit more. Oh my God, dude. This looks like absolute horse shit. Okay, fuck. It's got to be the moment you show it. I haven't checked out yet,

but I got the lighter brown ones instead of the black ones for you, buddy. I knew that you would appreciate me. My mustache really makes me look sickly. Or maybe it's because I have COVID. Save as. Okay, I'm gonna go ahead and save this. Create alt S or control alt.

I don't know why I said create. Fucking idiot. Hold on. Because we have that new server for Super Mega stuff, I'm going to go ahead and put this Super Mega Cast

episodes new folder 264 and then guess what's going in there? That? Dude, I've been organizing the fuck out of this server.

No, no, no, no, no. Hold on. Yeah, I'm about to put it in Discord. Brian, have you downloaded Dropbox yet? No. I haven't been at the office. That's my excuse. You do it at home, dude. I use Dropbox

now for all my files. It's fucking awesome. I only use this computer for porn and Sea of Thieves. Really? I mean, that's two good functions. No, I don't watch porn on my computer. You don't watch porn on my computer you don't watch porn on your computer no what do you watch on your fucking leap pad on my phone bro if i'm feeling real frisky maybe my ipad oh okay dude porn on the ipad's a different experience my ipad nano

i wish they made that it's like a like it's just a phone. Super tiny iPad. All it is is a fucking wider phone. Just a fat phone. Okay, Super Megacast. Episodes, 264 assets. Here it is. All right. Ladies and gentlemen,

if you're watching the YouTube version, if you would go ahead and take a peek at your screen in three, two, one. No way! You like them, dude? They look pretty good. I'm not even going to front. I think they're going to be smaller than that.

It said they're medium. Yeah, they'll probably be a little bit smaller. You look like you're wearing like a mask like a masquerade here okay I made them really small and I think they look even more ridiculous when they're like

let me see that one hold on hold on I'll let everyone see it at the same time again this is fucking this is good I think I like them small better i think it's a better look for me smallglasses.png okay uh oh uh by the way from now on when you do super mega cast save everything in that full in the folder you'll see how i organized like the audio and everything like the yeah i've been uh while i've been sick i've just been doing a i've been

doing so much just like creative work and so much fucking organizing for Super Mega. Alright. 3, 2, 1. Look on the screen, ladies and gentlemen. They're side by side. Do you guys like it when I have small glasses or big glasses? i've i think it's gonna be somewhere in between those two sizes actually okay i'll just the big one the big one looks like you're like cat woman the same one just like you bought a comical pair of glasses from party city it doesn't even look like i look like

a fucking like snail you know and it's like my eyes't even look, like, I look like a fucking, like, snail, you know? And it's, like, my eyes, like, sticking up above my head. I look like a human snail. Well, also, like, from a distance, it's going to be like, does that dude just have, like, really dark circles around his eyes? Yeah, dude, it just looks like fucking really dark skin. Okay, I did a version now, Ryan, that is just probably the regular size. Okay, and you're going to put this one in between the two.

It still doesn't look good, but it looks better. It's like Goldilocks and the Jenna glasses. Check it out, ladies and gentlemen. Look on screen. This one's just right. This one's too small. This one's just right, dude. You ever think about how fucking Goldilocks literally just does a break in her?

Like, she just breaks into someone's fucking house and eats their food? And, like, breaks their chair and shit? It's called squatting, and it's legal. The bears come back, they can't do shit. Mine now. Yeah, sorry. Squatting is such a concept to me. Why does it exist?

How is it possible? Like, what is the point of that? I want to go secure a bunch of properties around the country by squatting. I'm going to go to Hassan's nice-ass mansion and fucking squat there. And by squat, I mean I'll just squat in the front yard and take a picture. Oh, dude. Do you think Hassan will invite us to his mansion? No. I guarantee.

We're not his friends. After the podcast, we will be. Dude, I'm going to secure us an invite to his mansion. In fact, I need everybody just to basically I'll bring you Capri Sun and just be sipping it while he's showing us, giving us a house tour. Yeah, and this is the

candy room. It was inspired by Notch's candy room. Guys, Hasan needs to know that he needs to invite us for a play date at his mansion. Yeah, I don't think he has the time. He's like working every day, streaming all day. On what? Telling lies?

Now he's doing the new show with H3H3 Productions. H3H3, H3H3. Yeah, the new political commentator show. I forgot. I saw it on Instagram. It's out on Friday, isn't it? No, it's already out. Oh, it's out? Yeah. I want to on Instagram. It's out on Friday, isn't it? No, it's already out. Oh, it's out?

Yeah. I want to watch it. I want to see what their hot takes are. It's, uh... Fuck, man. What their little political takes are. Just a lot of Sea of Thieves videos. Hold up.

That's what they do on the podcast? No, I watched a bit of it. It's called Leftovers. You're still trying to figure out what glasses you want? No, no, no, I got it. I just thought that I had the same one twice. Dude, licorice pizza looks fucking sick, though, right? Dude, that movie looks really good.

It looks like one of those movies that's going to make me feel kind of bad at the end. I love Paul Thomas Anderson. And it's fucking... The girl's from a band, isn't she? Well, I really like that Paul Thomas Anderson's using actors that you've never seen before. and it's fucking... The girl's from a band, isn't she? Well, I really like that Paul Thomas Anderson's using actors that you've never seen before. I think that's really cool. I love that dude's haircut.

I might have to do that. Really? I was thinking, dude, wait, the quantity permitted for each order is six glasses. What? It's weird because this is the same haircut that that other kid has in that Sopranos movie. This isn't the same guy, is it?

Dude. Is it? Is that just his hair? I can't fucking get all these glasses, Ryan. Well, you have to get the Jenna. I can only order six at once? Well, yes, I know. And unfortunately, that's going to take up one of the spots of my six glasses.

So I'm going to have to get rid of a pair of glasses I actually wanted to wear. That's not him. Show me the money. Hey, must be the money. One of the Safdie brothers is going to be in it? Oh, really? I saw, I think Benny Safdie tweet about it.

I fucking love Paul Thomas Anderson. One of my favorite movies of all time. Boogie Nights. So I think it's going to be good. The trailer looked great. What is this actor's name who plays this dude? He's new, I think. I haven't seen him in anything.

Is he brand new? He's got a brand new role. He has the same fucking haircut as the Sopranos movie dude. What's that Sopranos movie called? Sopranos Road called? Godfather? No. I love the song in the trailer. It's kind of like

I love when they take songs like that David Bowie song and edit it. Oh, you know what's funny, dude? Wait. Paul Thomas Anderson did Life Aquatic, right? Wait, wait. Paul Thomas Anderson did Life Aquatic, right? Wait, no way. What?

I didn't know that. That the person playing the young James Gandolfini from Sopranos, which I haven't seen, I just know the character and shit, he's his son. It's his son. He's playing the younger version of him. Oh, really? So that's just a crazy coincidence or did you say that because you thought it really looked like him same haircut

it's not the same act i don't think it's the same actor in um it's not the same actor from licorice pizza but i'm just reading this now when i was looking oh this guy was i love that name. Michael Gandolfi. I love that song, dude. Is there life on my mind? He was in Ocean's 8 as the bus boy. Yeah, but didn't, he did Life Aquatic, didn't he? Paul Thomas Anderson? No, you're thinking of Wes Anderson.

Ah, fuck. Yeah, I'm thinking of uh wes anderson ah fuck yeah i'm thinking of wes anderson life aquatic's amazing though that's my favorite of his movies the song in the licorice pizza trailer life on mars by david bowie is in life aquatic but it's like a brazilian bossa nova cover what would you say is your favorite wes anderson film um probably the one where your fat fucking mom sucks my dick. Was that not funny? Was that... There I go again, messing up jokes.

I'm sorry, dude. No, it's fine. Why doesn't Ryan actually... Why does he actually get upset when Matt jokes about his mom? Dude, like, it's just a fucking joke but he takes it like such a fucking baby okay i ordered my glasses they're ordered ladies and gentlemen i can't wait for my jenna glasses to arrive yes yes queen these are lay you're gonna slay with these these glasses are the the epitome of of slain are they not they are i think

like like these glasses are yes queen dude they have the pride collection on i buy direct and the glasses are rainbow randy rainbow yeah dude check out these randy rainbow glasses bro i'm sending it in discord i want wanna be popular. I wanna be popular. Did he do a Joe Biden song with that one? No, I was just making that up. Most of his songs are parodies. Why would you put words in Randy Rainbow's mouth?

I wanna be president. I wanna be president. Not that Cheeto man with his tiny hands. Whoa. That's it right there dude dude are you a ghost writer for what the fuck what the fuck as i was saying ghost writer i was adding another pair of glasses to my cart that i had saved for later and they're called ghost writer what a weird coincidence life life is stars are coincidences crazy there's no there's no such thing as a coincidence.

But are you a ghostwriter for Randy Rambo? Was that good? Did you like that? Yes. Can you sing it again? No. That's the one and done, baby. I can't use all my creative juices.

I got to save some for... Yeah, for when we get back together. Because hopefully, I'd like to see you before the end of the week. It's Tuesday. when we get back together because hopefully I'd like to see you before the end of the week. Yeah. It's Tuesday. My thing is I want, before I see either you or Jackson, you both got to, for,

for me, get to, Oh yeah, no, I'm testing negative. Just get negative twice. Even though the tests, the tests are good.

I don't know. I just feel like it would, it's like a good kind of like safety measure. I can do that. You want to pay for my rushed? I just, I don't want to. I'll seriously pay for it. No, no, no, no, no.

I'll just get the one that just takes like a day because. And that one's more accurate too. It's $250 fucking dollars. So I don't want to have to spend $500 on COVID tests. So I'll get tomorrow. I'm going to get tested, and I'll get a... Just regular PCR, which I think, I don't know. I don't know if it's more accurate.

It's accurate. Should I get the Rush one tomorrow? You don't have, I mean, if you want, you can. That's up to you. I mean, you can also talk to your insurance about it as well in terms of paying. I don't know if they'll cover it. I'm not going to lie.

I, this is a privileged thing to say, but I have't know if they'll cover it. I'm not going to lie. This is a privileged thing to say, but I have been enjoying my quarantine quite a bit. I've just been doing a lot of creative shit. It's so fucking tone deaf. He's actually enjoying himself. He's telling me how happy he is. Read the room. you should be miserable i saw i did see

people getting upset about our our update video why uh this is not something to joke about matt oh those are probably just like the uh no no no there were people that were actually like uh i did see some people that were like, you know, kind of. Well, then they'll eventually fizzle out or they'll get over it. They can suck it. You know what I'm saying? It's just whatever. Whatever y'all want to do, just continue watching. I mean, they again, I mean, people might just watch and like they just want to complain a little bit, too.

I mean, it doesn't everyone. Hey, everyone loves complaining. Complaining feels good, right? Everybody loves to complain. I love complaining. Complaining feels good, right? Everybody loves to complain. I love complaining. You complain with your bros or your sisters. I can't complain at all, man. Ryan and his sisters are back for another...

I'm imagining a movie, Ryan. Girls just want to have fun. I'm imagining a comedy movie where it's you and a group of five joyous black women. And you guys are doing a road trip across the country. But I call them my gal pals. Are they boyfriend-free girls? Yeah, they are.

Speaking of boyfriend-free girls. Exactly. We got a Chris Chan update. Finally, Chris Chan wrote a letter from prison to Null, who is the owner of Kiwi Farms. Chris Chan is sitting pretty with no crayons, unfortunately, but at least a pen and some paper. You would think they would give them crayons in prison. Crayons are safer. You can't stab yourself in the neck with a crayon.

No, you can do it with a pen. Yeah. So maybe it is crayon, but it gonna be a pen yeah so maybe it is maybe it is crayon but it looked like pen because the images are online no it was it was really fine so it couldn't have been pinned but it might have been the paper was like three feet long and so like when you zoom out it looks like pen you know but chris uh chris has has has dropped to a very deeper point of schizophrenia, or what I think is schizophrenia, because Chris Chan believes that they're Jesus Christ.

Armchair doctor, psychiatrist. Dr. Watson in the house? I mean, people in the comments... Please call me Dr. Psychiatrist Watson. The rapist, I mean therapist uh matthew watson uh please like maybe i maybe i'm wrong so feel free to correct me in the comments on this but like chris chan i think does have schizophrenia because it's like the the belief that they're jesus christ in the second coming like that's pretty common with schizophrenia i'm sure uh there's actually it's it's just like also it's like does it does it at this point who who really knows there's

probably so many things that developed or got worse from the lack of of a decent childhood upbringing yeah and also just prison max max and i were talking that we feel like this jesus christ saga is probably because there's nothing in jail for chris to like uh like to be stimulated by but there's a bible so chris probably read the bible or like read parts and then like created lore out of that yes sonichu in the bible but chris chan Chan is literally the reincarnation of Jesus Christ. That's what Chris said. So Chris also said, anytime anyone has ever prayed, it has been to me. So just know that.

So Ariana Grande was right. God is a woman. Does that mean Sonichu is like the Holy Spirit or something? Yeah. Sonichu is part like the holy spirit or something yeah sonichu is the holy spirit so wait okay there's the holy ghost the father son the holy ghost so the father which still confuses me to this day that they're all the same thing well okay so the father is bob i i do you want me to explain the explain how I think of the Holy Trinity, right? In real life or in Christian? In real life.

Okay, go for it. So God is God, right? He's the being, the ultimate being. God then sends himself. It's not like truly himself, but it's like himself in human form it's like this it's it's hard to like pinpoint down but so that's jesus the the human embodiment of but he's god and what god wants and then you have god is extra dimensional so he can exist multiple multiple at once yes and well and and the holy spirit is mainly like supposed to be the the his his spirit living oh that's good you have to put that in i just sent ryan this picture on discord

i don't know why it made me laugh so hard the holy spirit has been described as that like feeling you get you know when you get butter you know when we used to get butterflies in church holding our hands up and shit i get little tingles in my penis yeah it's touching me so it's it's he exists so the holy spirit exists through all of us because jesus died for our sins and in us is we're God's creation. So in a way, we we're not God, but we were his children, so to speak. But God. Yeah.

So I think the Holy Spirit is just kind of that that uniform idea and feeling and passion around around God and Jesus. All right. Let's, like, I gotta... Some shit like that. Okay. Why are you sending me fan art? Well, one is a fan art. The other one... One is just a real photograph.

The Holy Spirit is referred to as the Lord and giver of life in the Nicene Creed. He is the creator spirit. Like, I don't... People also ask, how can I understand the Holy Spirit? To receive the Holy Spirit is when you trust God with your heart

and believe that God sent his son to die in your place as a sacrifice for your sins. You know, if Jesus died for my sins and sacrificed that, then I can sin, I can do whatever I want and it's okay. Right?

I think so. I mean like, okay, do you want to continue thinking because you i think you said you were having some sort of idea about chris chan i was just saying i was just saying like chris chan is jesus uh like like compare chris chan now to the Trinity. Like, who is who? You know? Like, who is Sonichu? Is Sonichu...

Okay, Chris is obviously Jesus Christ, but that leaves God and the Holy... That's a weird... That's a thin penis. Ryan sent me a nice picture of a beautiful naked man oh you'll love this one dude that's a weird penis it's thin oh dude what's his tattoo

dude I love he has the Chinese tattoos down his back dude that guy it looks like he's just sniffing his ass not even eating he's like oh yeah that looks like a, that guy, it looks like he's just sniffing his ass, not even eating. He's like. It looks like a guy that would just work it like a TGI Fridays. Oh, here's another. What is this you sent me? Download.jfif?

Download. What the fuck? Okay, I downloaded it. That's not a file type, dude. .jfif? The fuck is Okay, I downloaded it. That's not a file type, dude. Dot J-F-I-F? The fuck is this, dude? Oh my god. Dude, I love his little smile.

It's a picture of a man in handcuffs with his penis out. And he's standing up in a bedroom looking at the camera. And he's got a little tiny smile. That's definitely not America. See the banana tree outside? And then see that room, the tile and then like the decoration like i don't like don't you just know like you see it's like oh yeah that's not america that's just like no american would ever decorate a room so drab um fuck i just realized something what it's time for ad What? It's time for ad breaks.

True. Let's go to ad breaks. Those aren't file types. What are those? I don't know. .jfif? Are you sending me viruses? Like, I don't get it, dude.

I'll delete the viruses. i'll get you next time though thank you man what are those though what were you sending what's a dot jfi i don't let me look it up because i'm just saving shit from google images because a dot jfif okay jfif file extension what is it is a bitmap graphic that uses jpeg compression it is i have never heard of that file type common jpeg file format okay these pictures are fantastic and one of my favorite things to do and i fucking wish we could share this like publicly like and show the pictures but if you go on twitter and find like nudist accounts of like of like 60 year old men like all you gotta do okay here's how here's how you find good accounts search like like uh

i'm on twitter right now i'm gonna search hot tits okay and then i'm gonna go to photos uh okay or that didn't come up okay yeah so there we go you go to photos click like a hot girl and then go in the responses and you'll find uh responses that are like now she is smoking hot fire emoji spicy emoji love the short skirt sexy legs and big tits got my cock hard so now i click on this guy's account dude what the fuck is this guy's this? It's just a picture of sperm cells. Only adults 18 plus can view my account. UK-based guy, porno, sexual, edger, wanker. I love girls, girls, girls.

Here's this guy's profile. So this is my favorite thing. You go on Twitter and you just start going down the rabbit hole of these profiles. He posts a lot of porn. But then you just click on one of these and you look at like his like what what he uh has been responding with and what other people like say here's someone that says wow so delicious to a picture of a pussy oh it's all in portuguese damn it well i gotta go back just keep going you find some good ass shit what are you looking for ryan because your silence means you're looking for something right now oh so oh here's a pussy someone's telling me that i

could potentially play halo infinite right now not right now but like this uh this coming soon it starts october 3rd no actually it's this weekend it starts oh asian sex diary oh oh he this guy said something on asian sex diary his he responded the guy that i sent you with the sperm cells he said in the last four weeks i've been lucky enough to have fucked both the thai and filipina girl both lovely sexy young girls that loved bwc what's wrong with white women? Big white cock. The Filipina Pinae girl gave me the best blowjob I've ever had and let me slide my big dick in her tight little ass.

Looking forward to sex holidays. Ew. So this guy's a sex tourist. So my man loves the human trafficking industry. Dude, I'm gonna put that on my Facebook as my job. Sex tourist. Sex tourists are fucking creepy, dude.

It's like the dudes that go to Thailand just to like fuck like Thai girls off the street, which is always fucking, it's sex trafficking usually. It's like these are people that are caught up in human trafficking. So it's like these rich businessmen that are not even divorced.

Dude, every, like, when I was at the Ladyboy bar in Thailand, it was only like middle-aged white men that were definitely married or just recently divorced,

like sitting there with a beer like, mmm, mmm. Hiya. I brought me fucking balls on the table. Big fuck, it's all right. I want to play Halo Infinite, and I'm too lazy, and I didn't sign up,

and I didn't get it right. But this person said. I bet me cock and balls, eh? He's telling me that it's possible. He's actually from our Discord. Eh, I bet. He's a moderator on our Discord. I bet me pork and beans on the top.

Oh, who is it? Axie? Unsubbing. Oh, I like Unsubbin. Shout out to the Discord moderators real quick, because the SuperMega Discord for Patreon is fucking badass. We get in there all the time and talk. Yeah, I do a lot of Sea of Thieves talking in there.

I saw we actually have a special guest this week. Ryan, do you know who Penis Mike is? I don't know. Who is that? Have you seen people mention him? No, I've seen him. I have seen him. So Penis Mike.

So I did a press conference in the Discord the other night. For those that don't know what that is, it's where I can speak and people listen. Jesus. that's crazy i speak and people listen and they can't talk but they can like join the room and listen what i'm saying and there were like 500 people in there and i was like i'm going to pick some people to chat with so i went down randomly selected people and i let them jump in and like like it was like callers calling in one of the people i randomly picked was this guy named penis mike uh and he was fucking he was pretty cool but then uh i jokingly kicked him from like chatting but i didn't realize

that i actually banned him from the whole server and i couldn't figure out how to unban him and he was on twitter like dude i'm i banned i can't get back in and i did it to another guy too uh so now that's epic and penis mike were both the users are accidentally banned and the admins had to figure some shit out. Does Penis Mike have a role that's just Penis Mike? Does he? It's like his role is Penis Mike. Are there roles on the side? No, I'm looking.

Oh, Astrocyst is in here. Dude, okay, Penis Mike. But I told Penis... Everyone was saying Penis Mike for the podcast. So without further ado... Do we have penis Mike here? I might. He was bragging about and people

know and they're saying at penis Mike. How did the podcast go at 502 PM? They never called. What the fuck? I know I wore my super mega hat for nothing. It sounds like you made a promise to someone and now you're just remembering that you have to. He says he still wants to give us a chance. All right, gentlemen uh i'm gonna go ahead and call up penis mike uh do you

know who penis mike actually is no he's just some random dude that i added to my press conference then accidentally banned from the server for like a day penis and everyone was like justice for penis mike and now penis mike is a fucking legend on the discord server dude dude let's fucking get dude i'm scrolling through general and shit and all i see is just people talking about penis mike dude let's get penis mike on what's taking trying to find him hold on hold on i'm trying to find him was he talking where was i talking it was the music section there he is yeah all right i'm gonna go ahead and call penis mike i'm gonna add penis mike as a friend as well yeah his roles is is meg heads and penis mike he has a role in the server and it's just penis mike dude i fucking love penis mike who is penis mike dude he's a legend man i i

like i've i've seen him but like now that we're like discussing it more i just like now i'm getting more and more curious especially since we're about to talk to the penis okay i'm going in the general chat real quick it's an at penis mike accept my request because i can't call penis mike until i fucking uh am friends with him. Come on, Penis Mike! Uh, okay, oh, he said done, okay. Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, Penis Mike.

Penis Mike's audio failed to record, so his voice will be substituted with a computer narration. What's up, Penis Mike? Hey, it's Penis Mike, ladies and gentlemen! Penis Mike tells the Super Mega Brothers that it is an honor to be on the Super Mega cast. Well, definitely for us. Thank you for coming on. I mean, this is a big honor for us. This is a really big deal for us to have the Penis Mike.

So tell us a little bit about yourself, Penis Mike. Penis Mike goes on to tell Matt and Ryan that he is a 19-year-old college student at DeVry University. He studies male anatomy and loves to party. He lives with his mom's boyfriend and enjoys making YouTube videos for his 11 subscribers and two friends. Like most of the SuperMega fanbase, he suffers from several mental disorders and frequently soils his sheets during the night. Congratulations. Hey, how long were you banned for, Penis Mike, when I invited you into my speech and then accidentally kicked you? Penis Mike recounts I invited you into my speech and then accidentally kicked you?

Penis Mike recounts the infamous incident on the SuperMega Discord server in which Matt accidentally banned him and did not know how to add him back until the next day. The three share a hearty chuckle over the comical nonsense of the situation, and how funny it is that his name is Penis Mike. Yeah, dude, I'm really sorry about that. I was trying to kick you from the call just like regularly and make a goof out of it, but for some reason... Penis Mike then asks if he can do some shoutouts. Alright, Penis Mike got the shoutouts. Okay, yeah, go ahead, Penis Mike. Penis Mike shouts out various people for an uncomfortably long period of time. It was honestly rude and a massive overstep of his boundaries with the position he had been lucky enough to receive. Matt and Ryan were very annoyed, but hit it well. Also, nobody that Penis Mike shouted out sounded cool. How are race relations at your campus?

For the sake and reputation of Penis Mike, it's fortunate that this part of the call was not recorded, because Penis Mike went on to say some truly disgusting things. He ends his rant by bringing up Matthew's father, Dale. Actually, you know what, dude? Let's add Dale in here. Let me call Dale and just let him say hi to Penis Mike. Dude, I want to know. Just tell your dad right off the bat, hey, can you say hey to Penis Mike?

Yeah. Here we go. Let's do this. He won't be able to hear you, Penis Mike. Oh, he won't. Okay. But you'll be able to hear you, Penis Mike. Oh, he won't. Okay. But you'll be able to hear him. Yeah.

Here we go. Hey, buddy. Hey, Dad, what's up? Not much. You sound good. Yeah, I'm pretty awesome because I'm talking to Penis Mike right now. Well, that's fine. Good for you. Do you want to say hey to Penis Mike?

Are we on the air? No, I'm just talking to Penis Mike. Call me back later. Why? I have Penis Mike now, not later. I don't know what you're talking about. Will you say hey to him? Who's Mike? Penis Mike.

Yeah, call me back later. Can you just say hey Penis Mike real quick? No, I won't. Dad, just say hi to Penis Mike Can you just say hey penis Mike real quick No I won't Dad just say hi to penis Mike No I'm not Dad seriously I'm not kidding this is serious God fuck Fuck you dude god damn fuck my dad dude

He's not gonna like that one Matthew Yeah he didn't sound too happy He's like no I'm not gonna say hey to penis Mike no I'm not doing that penis Mike I'm sorry dude I'm really sorry about Dale penis Mike and would say hello to you though I'm sure and would say hello

to you here call mom watch this you know what my mom's probably drunk as fuck right now because she's with my my cousin and who likes drinking a lot. And they're having dinner tonight. They're on their first date. Here.

Let's see. It's 9.30 over there. That's perfect drinking hours. That's perfect. Hey, mom? Hey. Hey, I can't talk. I'll have to call you back in a bit, but I can just talk real quick.

Would you mind real quick saying hey to my friend Penis Mike? Wait, what? Will you say hey to my friend Penis Mike? I know it's kind of a weird name, but he's a legend in our Discord server and he just wants you to say hey. Yeah, I think Jamie will say hey. Hey, Penis Mike. Hey. All right. That's my cousin. My cousin, Jamie,

said hey, Penis Mike. Mom, can I get one too? Hey, Penis Mike. There we go. There it is. Thank you, Mom. Thank you. Penis Mike is thrilled. We called Dad.

He was very angry and wouldn't say hello and it hurt Penis Mike's feelings. I... Thank you. Okay, I'll call you back after this podcast, but... Bye, Mom. Bye, Jamie. Hey, Penis Mike, look at that.

I guess we know who the better parent is. Well, we've always known who the better parent was. Penis Mike thanks Matthew and Ryan for the much-needed exposure and clout they've granted him by allowing him to be on their podcast, which is among the top 50 comedy podcasts on the charts, in case you didn't know. Penis Mike, it's been a pleasure talking to you.

We'll call you back on another episode soon and we'll get more inputs from Penis Mike. Well, until then, Penis Mike, take care, all right? Penis Mike expresses his love for the super mega brothers and says his farewells thank you I love you too penis Mike hope this stuff goes well alright we're back we're back from the penis Mike call we had a nice call with penis Mike

I think it went well it went great man I love penis Mike I recorded my desktop audio via quick time on my Mac, and I'm not sure if it actually recorded his voice. It should have, but if it didn't, you heard a nice recap of what happened

and some of the highlights. Penis Mike's a great guy. We'll have to get him on again soon. On a regular episode, we'll be able to hear him because we're not doing this whole Discord thing. But, hey, man, Penis Mike's great. Hey, well, ladies ladies and gentlemen that's about all the time we got for today's episode of the super mega podcast thank you to penis mike's for joining us thank you to ann watson uh dale you can do better um yeah yeah do better dale yeah for real um actually if i don't call him now i guarantee

we'll probably go four or five weeks without talking. Yeah, you should probably go call him. I don't I don't care. All right. Thank you, guys. Go check out our Patreon where you can join the discord and you can actually meet Penis Mike and talk to him and see a bunch of bonus stuff. We got a ton of videos on there you get this podcast ad free before it hits streaming services and you get episodes of the super mini cast which is uh an exclusive mini podcast where we talk about topics and stuff that

you guys suggest uh uncensored um so yeah there's also penises on the there's pictures of penises there are pictures of penis is pissing as well wait really well the guy put it no no remember the q a picture with the guy in the purple pants with his penis and he's pissing? Yeah, and he's on the couch and he's pissing on himself. All right. That's five bucks a month. And if you want to support the boys, we have new Patreon goals. And if we hit 9,000 patrons, what was the goal real quick?

Let me check this out. I had a couple. I set some new goals. Give me just one second. Let me check this out. I had a couple. I set some new goals. Give me just one second. Let me sign in. I want everyone to help us reach these goals. If we hit

9,001 patrons, the Super Mega Boys get to have a pizza party with one medium, one topping pizza, one liter of Sprite, and a viewing of Mulan, and it's over 9,000. Wait, the new Mulan or the old Mulan? Old Mulan. Okay, good.

We actually have to do this. Do you realize how close we are to 10,000 patrons? If we do that, we'll record the video and upload it to Patreon. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And 10,000 patrons would be an absolute dream. If we can And 10,000 patrons would be an absolute dream.

If we can hit 10,000 patrons, Matt's parents, my parents have to legally get remarried. So I really want that. That's going to be exciting. For the sake of my family. My dad has been looking forward to it. My mom's looking forward to it. The family's going to get back together. It's going to be great.

The gang's going to be back together again. So thank you guys for listening and check out the Patreon, check out the Discord. We love you guys. Lots of fun stuff on the way and thanks for dealing

with this little hiatus while we, while I'm on, while I'm, while I have COVID and we will catch you guys in the next episode. Yep.

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