supermegashow - EP 28 - Thanksgiving

Episode Date: February 24, 2017

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Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:23 19-plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Hi, can I take your order, please? Can I get a Big Mac, McRab, McFlurry, and a McDouble? Keep it rare, I need a Happy Meal, McCrispy, and 10 McNuggets. Tasty golden fries, a cold drink, one extra ice. Junior chicken will be fire And a sweet hot apple pie
Starting point is 00:00:47 Is that it? Let me get a quarter pounder with cheese A flat fish show, please Make grittas, a McMuffin, and a large coffee A hamburger, cheeseburger, hodgepodge, hotcakes Vanilla cone shake and a hot fudge sundae Ba-da-ba-ba-ba Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. Welcome to Super Megacast.
Starting point is 00:01:14 I am Matt Watson. I'm Ryan McGee. And we just wanted to make sure you're celebrating with your family and eating... What do you usually eat for Thanksgiving? Turkey? I usually do honey-baked ham. Ooh, that's also a valid choice. family and eating, uh, what do you usually eat for Thanksgiving? Turkey? I usually do honey baked ham. Ooh, that's a, that's also a valid choice unless you are not from America.
Starting point is 00:01:36 If you're from Canada or Europe or Australia or Asia and you're listening to this and you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, you don't matter at all. So turn this podcast off. Thank you. Uh, now that we're talking to the straight up Americans of the world, we just wanted to make sure that you know, you know, make sure you know that we hold your values intact. Thanksgiving is a day just like any other day to remember the destruction of other cultures in support of our own. And just doing the American thing and eating a lot of food. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:01 So. Yeah. So, guys, it is today when this podcast comes out. It is Thanksgiving. The day. So we hope that this podcast can be like a little dessert after your Thanksgiving meal. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:02:16 Yeah, it's like after you eat, you go upstairs, turn this on, fall asleep. You don't really listen to it, but, you know, you use it as a way to just kind of clock out. Doesn't matter. We're still getting the ad revenue, so it's all good. We'll probably put 15 or so. Mid-rolls? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:34 But Matt, you recently saw a movie that I really liked, and I couldn't really talk about it that much because you didn't see it yet, and that movie is Moonlight. Oh, God. it was so good. So fucking good. It's one of the best movies of the year. It is. Hands down, it is one of the best movies of the year for me that I have seen. It was fantastic. It was, oh, it was just, I went and saw it by myself.
Starting point is 00:02:58 And it was just a beautiful, heartbreaking, incredible film. Very real. Yeah, very real. It didn't do, like, movie shit a film. Very real. Yeah, very real. It didn't do like movie shit a lot of the times. Very eye-opening to that kind of like culture and what it's like to be. The movie's about a gay guy growing up in the hood, the drug-riddled hood of Miami. And it is incredible. So good. We definitely recommend to watch watch I give this movie two kisses that's good we talk about Ryan tell me what so what's your uh I mean
Starting point is 00:03:38 obviously I mean you live in LA now so you don't you don't do it anymore, but what was your traditional Thanksgiving like? What would you do? Well, I have two families, so mom's side, dad's side. I think everyone, of course, does, but mine is a lot more separated because my parents got divorced, so I have two separate Thanksgivings
Starting point is 00:04:01 instead of a big family gathering of sorts, I guess, or mom and dad coming to both. have two separate thanksgivings instead of like a big family gathering of sorts i guess or like mom and dad coming to both um so i'd go probably either at the beginning no i'd probably go to spartanburg greenville or something like that and then spartanburg spartanburg and then uh my i don't know thanksgiving has always been great because we don't really eat the typical stuff when it comes to my mom's side of the family just a bunch of uh i don't know. Thanksgiving has always been great because we don't really eat the typical stuff when it comes to my mom's side of the family. Just a bunch of, I don't know, my grandmother's Dutch and my grandfather was Middle Eastern, so there's a hodgepodge of delicious foods that weren't really American.
Starting point is 00:04:35 Typical. Yeah. But of course we did have turkey and stuff, but of course the sides, we would have like hummus and what is it? I'm trying to think. Kibbe? I can't pronounce it right because I'm a dirty little man. Get out of here with that shit, Ryan.
Starting point is 00:04:48 And then over on my dad's side, we just have nice little honey-baked ham, some mashed potatoes, some sweet potato salad. Speaking my language. Macaroni and cheese. Don't put any pineapples in that shit. In the mac and cheese?
Starting point is 00:05:02 Yeah. People do that? Just warning people. People do that? I don't warning people. People do that? I don't know. I'm just saying don't do it. Oh. I thought... If you have the urge to put pineapples in mac and cheese, don't do it. That sounds fucking... I thought you were saying that's actually a thing people do. No.
Starting point is 00:05:15 But people put pineapple on pizza. That's perfectly fine and delicious. That sounds gross to me. No, it's... Have you ever had it? Wait, wait. Have you ever had it? It's like putting an apple on pizza. Have you ever had it? Have you ever had pineapple on pizza? No, I've never had pineapple on pizza. Don't judge it! I'm gonna judge it. It sounds
Starting point is 00:05:32 gross! Yeah, it sounds gross. It sounds fucking disgusting. Of course it sounds gross. I'm gonna cut up some apples. I'm gonna cut up like a fucking pear and put it on a pizza. Completely different, Ryan. It's not completely different. It's different fruit! They're in the same family. It's different fucking fruit. And no, pineapples and apples are not in the same family and pears and pineapples are not in the same fucking family. I'm gonna put like a little kiwi
Starting point is 00:05:48 Not in the same family. A little fucking dragon fruit and put it on my pizza. Completely different. No, I'm not gonna do that. Pineapple is different. And, and, and, yeah. Do you put carrots on your pizza? Ryan, your argument does not hold up. Pineapple, I agree, looks and sounds gross on pizza, but it is my favorite
Starting point is 00:06:04 because the flavor combination is delicious. Isn't that like a Hawaiian pizza thing? Yeah, Hawaiian pizza. Oh, God, Hawaiian pizza is the best with a little Canadian bacon. No, no, just plain cheese or just pepperoni and cheese is the best. It's boring as shit. No, it's the best. I could eat that shit up.
Starting point is 00:06:19 I don't get bored. If you get bored of the pepperoni, take a bite of the cheese. If you get bored of the cheese, take a bite of the pepperoni. Boom. I feel bad for you, Ryan. I truly feel bad for you. We mostly only order all that shit. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:31 I mean, I'm always down for cheese. You know, I'll be honest, Ryan. I'm not the biggest fan of pepperoni. Really? Like, I can do pepperoni pizza, but it's never my first choice. Yeah, mine is usually just plain cheese. I like plain cheese pizza. It's just good. You can dip the crust in the garlic.
Starting point is 00:06:50 Papa John's is my favorite place to order pizza from. I like, I think Papa John's and Domino's are tied for me. Where? Papa John's and Domino's. I think they're tied for me because I like... Domino's crust is better. Yeah, Domino's has better crust, but Papa John's, I think, I don't know, I think they might just have better pizza overall.
Starting point is 00:07:06 I like that they don't use the, like, the sauce isn't that, there's not so much sauce on it. Like, there's a good ratio of sauce and cheese on a Papa John's pizza. Chris, Chris told me, he's like, oh, I figured out the best way to order a pizza, just ask for less cheese and less sauce. And then, and then, then like he ordered a pizza and i had a piece of it and it was so so dry and and like he had like no cheese he's like this is the good stuff this is it's just like old and withered and gray and like flaking apart chris i think you're just eating a piece of aged leather it's literally just dried out pita bread with some mexican cheese sprinkled on top and ketchup ketchup. This is the good stuff, Matt.
Starting point is 00:07:46 Okay, Chris. Yeah, but back to Thanksgiving. My Thanksgivings usually, you know, I didn't get to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family last year. I didn't do anything for Thanksgiving last year which sucked because it was my first Thanksgiving away from home and did absolutely nothing. And it was
Starting point is 00:08:02 not a good feeling knowing that the rest of the country was eating turkey and enjoying Thanksgiving festivities and so usually like it's either people come over to our house and like family members come over and my mom will make like a ham or a turkey
Starting point is 00:08:18 and then you know people will bring over sides and my mom makes this delicious broccoli casserole with richitz crackers and it is so good. My stepmom makes a casserole with Ritz crackers. That is like my favorite dish she makes. Is it like broccoli and stuff?
Starting point is 00:08:36 No, no, no. It's, it's kind of like, it's with rice-a-roni and chicken and they, they, she like, the crust on it is Ritz crackers. Yeah. It's really fucking good. My mom does that. It's Ritz crackers, but. It's really fucking good. My mom does that. It's Ritz crackers. But the inside is like cheese and broccoli and stuff.
Starting point is 00:08:48 Which sounds weird, but it's really good. Ritz crackers go so well with that shit. Dude, Ritz crackers are amazing. And it's weird that we're talking about Ritz crackers. Because the past three nights in a row. Have you been stealing my Ritz crackers? Were those your Ritz crackers? There's not a single one left. That box with like five sleeves of Ritz crackers? Were those your Ritz crackers? There's not a single one left.
Starting point is 00:09:06 That box with like five sleeves of Ritz crackers? I can order more. I was, wait, I thought that they had just been in our cabinet for like months and that's why I ate them. No, I ordered them back when, remember when I like had the flu, I guess? Oh yeah, the stomach thing. And I was like, I'm just going to order a bunch of like saltines and crackers and chips because they're easy to digest. Yeah, so the other night, I have this thing where I wake up every single night in the middle of the night and I just like binge eat and I'm starving.
Starting point is 00:09:29 So I woke up, I'm like, I need food, but we don't have anything. So I just saw a box of Ritz crackers. I'm like, these have been here forever. I'll eat these. We cleaned out the fridge this morning. We did clean out the fridge. I'm going to go grocery shopping today. I'm going to get, oh dude, I can't wait.
Starting point is 00:09:42 I'm going to have my cheese sticks back. Oh God Christ. What? Just solid sticks of sharp cheddar cheese. Oh, it's so good. Anyway, uh,
Starting point is 00:09:52 like every night I'll just wake up in the middle of the night and I'll just down a whole sleeve of Ritz crackers in my bed. It crumbs everywhere. Do you have anything with them or just plain Ritz crackers? Plain Ritz crackers. You don't like put cheese on them? No, just Ritz crackers by themselves are good.
Starting point is 00:10:05 You don't dip them in honey or anything? I don't like cheese that much, to be honest. I like it on things, but I don't like sliced cheese, and I don't like individual cheese bites. It smells too bad. I'm a man of my cheese. I know you are. I love it, and that's probably why I have bad gas. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:21 But I haven't been eating cheese. That's why I said, oh Christ, when you said you're about to order more cheese. Yeah. So prepare for that. Because I haven't been eating cheese. That's why I said oh Christ when you said you're gonna you're about to order more cheese. Yeah. So prepare for that. Because I live with you so. Aw. Poor thing. I live and work and record with you so I whatever your diet is I'm not gonna be able to escape it. Yeah but
Starting point is 00:10:37 we're gonna we gotta go grocery shop. When's the last time we went to the grocery store and just got groceries? Almost two months. Jesus Christ. Do we eat out that much? Uh, we just kind of like, they order lunch every day at the grump office, and so it's like that, and then afterwards we'll usually just not be hungry after that.
Starting point is 00:10:54 And just snack. Yeah, that's not very healthy at all. No, it's not. We'll have, I'll have, we'll both have like soylent, or you'll have your protein shake in the morning for breakfast. Yeah, soylent. And then we'll have an ordered lunch, maybe. And then dinner is a hodgepodge of whatever. Or I'll go to McDonald's or something and get dinner.
Starting point is 00:11:12 McDonald's is... McDonald's and Taco Bell are your two favorite places to go for dinner. Well, not so much. I've kind of run my course with McDonald's at this point. It's like... I'm tired of that location. They always get the order wrong. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:24 It's like, whenever I go there, it's like, oh i could use mcdonald's but they screw it up so bad and like i'm not one to complain about fast food or fast food service but this one mcdonald's is fucking unreal how bad it is like they will not no matter how many times you repeat it and they even put it on the screen they still get the order wrong and they don't care yeah laugh and smirk at you or roll their eyes like it was like hey oh you got my order wrong and it's like it's their inconvenience if they got your order wrong and like you're being we're being nice about it yeah like hey my order's wrong it's like hey i think i hey i ordered this but i think i got this they're like okay and then they spit in ryan's face and rub it all over his eyes look they, they can do whatever they want. Their, I don't know, their punishment is having to deal with customers every day.
Starting point is 00:12:11 Yeah, that is truly an endless hell. And that's probably why they don't do their job, because they hate it so much, because they get to deal with, especially in L.A., because it's one thing working fast food in the South where everyone is super sweet, but in L.A., I feel like everyone's really mean. Yeah, it's like everyone's very self-entitled in L.A. So I feel like you have to deal with a lot of shittier people working fast food in the West than in the South. If I worked at that McDonald's, I'd probably act that way.
Starting point is 00:12:42 Yeah, I would too, to be fair. But it's just that since I'm the customer, I have that bias for the food that I want to eat. Because I'm a fatty. With those stretch marks, they go... Put some coconut oil on that. That's the sound of my stretch marks stretching over time. If I filmed you For like two years And then sped it up to a two second clip
Starting point is 00:13:08 The sound it would make Is that your stomach coming out And then just like bouncing I can do a sick stomach drop Yeah I know you can You should put it on r slash belly drops I should I should do it as a joke and put it on what is it tit drop yeah not that i go on that but no of
Starting point is 00:13:30 course not you should uh you should do that in fact speaking of things that go sorry speaking of things they go i can't do that fucking sound effect that was good uh i liked it i'll be following you know banana has discovered my cat has discovered the little door stopper thing. You know that, the little like coil on the wall? Yeah. He's discovered that. And I'll be laying in bed and I'll be like 90% asleep. Do we have those in our rooms?
Starting point is 00:13:54 Yeah, we do. I just never notice it. Exactly. I'll be 90%. I never notice it either until I'm 90% asleep and my cat charges across the room, smacks it with his paw, and it goes. And then runs under your bed. Yeah, he does that. So I can't grab him or yell at him or anything because he's at the very end of my bed.
Starting point is 00:14:13 The thing is, the apartment's all clean now. Oh, it's so clean. It's so nice. So, like, he shouldn't have that much stuff to play around with, but I think he just gallops around your room. Yeah, what he does is it'll be... Sorry. Are you throwing up?
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Starting point is 00:15:38 That's A-N-G-I dot com. dot com it'll be I don't know 3 2 anywhere between 2 and 5 a.m. or even 6 and he will decide that that is the time that he's going to have his fun and
Starting point is 00:15:57 be active you know he can't he can't do it when I'm not at home because he stays he's at home from probably 1030 in the morning until you know 4, 5, 6 in the afternoon so he has all that time home alone and he can play around
Starting point is 00:16:13 he can run around do whatever he wants he's got peace and quiet yeah so he just sleeps then and then when I get home that's when he decides I'm gonna fucking go crazy so but it's not even right when I get home. It's when I turn the lights off and go to bed. And he runs around my room.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Every time you get a drink, he somehow gets the bottle cap from the drink. And it makes its way into my room. But I throw my drinks away and shit. I don't leave them out. Not anymore. But a while back, I don't know how he would just get the bottle caps. Because both of us were lazy as fuck and would never take the garbage out yeah but i know but all the trash would collect on the in the fucking kitchen in the living room i don't know how he got the bottle
Starting point is 00:16:52 caps off and he and they would be in my room and he just at 5 a.m he'll be smacking the bottle caps around the floor and chasing them and slamming into walls and stuff and then you let him out of your room in the middle of the fucking night and then he comes over, smacks the bottle cap under my door and then starts pawing under my door when I'm trying to sleep. Because I can't, I can't, like there's nothing that can stop him when he's freaking out in the middle of the night. I can spray him with a squirt ball. Break his paw!
Starting point is 00:17:15 I can yell at him, I can take everything away that he plays with and he'll just start running back and forth. He won't even be playing with anything. He'll charge from one side of my room to the other. And it's super loud and he'll slam into the wall cause he runs so fast And then he'll run under my bed or he'll jump up on my windowsill and then play with the curtains We just need to lock Lego and him in like the living room for like a good 30 minutes Have them play together have Lego annoy him
Starting point is 00:17:38 We should stick him in your little closet area They'll be more confined and they can just fucking go crazy and bounce off the walls Cause Lego won't hurt them. No. They have a good time together. It's funny to watch, actually. If anything, Banana will hurt him. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:51 Because they like to play in this way. I mean, I guess it's playing. But it's like Banana will be on his back on the ground with all four paws up in the air. And he's staring at Lego. And Lego's above him. And Lego will put his entire head in his mouth. Lego will just eat Banana completely. He'll put his whole face
Starting point is 00:18:10 and head in his mouth and Banana will be like smacking Lego and kicking him and stuff and then they just roll around and play like that and then Banana always hisses and gets mad and then keeps doing it. But just Lego looks like he doesn't understand he's just like oh look at this thing. Yeah I don't think Lego does understand.
Starting point is 00:18:25 This thing's swatting at me. This thing's having fun. I think Banana likes it because it's the only way he can get his little hunting urges out maybe. That's why he plays with the bottle caps. Probably because they're like little cockroaches. I don't understand this. I did a little research online. Still not very clear on it.
Starting point is 00:18:42 You gotta move the mic, Matt. No! I'm moving it. I'm still not very clear on it but you're gonna move the mic matt no i'm moving it i'm still not very clear on on why they do this but i've seen a lot of people's cats online do this um banana will get on top of like my dresser or the counter or anything and he'll look at a bottle or a cup with with a drink in it or deodorant or anything and he'll just knock it off with his paw and then watch it hit the ground and just stare at it he'll just it'll sit on top of like the the surface knock something off and then just stare down at it like whoa didn't we
Starting point is 00:19:15 look it up and it's like they're like interested in like watching things fall and shit it's like gravity or something there they don't he does that with everything it's so fucking annoying i can't get him to stop i don't know how to make him stop. Because I read online you can't discipline them for that because they don't know what they did wrong. Even if you punish them right when he knocks something off, he won't understand why he's being punished. So it'll just make him hate me and then start to get mean and bitter and stuff.
Starting point is 00:19:41 The only solution is not leaving drinks and stuff out, which we both do sometimes and then i'll hear a big crash and i'll walk in the room and then there's water or gatorade all over the floor and i'm just like god damn it you stupid cat and i pick him up and i'll put him in the washing machine and turn it on for for a whole cycle just to punish him what do you think like is something that could just i'm trying to think of just something that'll scare him into submission. We could beat the shit out of him and break his paws.
Starting point is 00:20:10 You could just like grab him by his two hind legs and start flinging him around. You'll probably hear a few snaps. Throw him across the room. He'll be like one of those balls at the end of the string on a paddle. Just throw him out the window. We don't live on the first floor, so we can just...
Starting point is 00:20:28 Yeah. Cats can survive a long fall, can't they? Cats can fall from a really... And for the dumbasses, no, we're not serious about any of this. But cats can... Yeah, there are other stupid people out there.
Starting point is 00:20:42 Oh my god, you're actually, you're so mean to your cat. You really do that? Oh my god, I have to report this video right now. Yeah, there are those stupid people out there. Oh my god, you're actually, you're so mean to your cat. You really do that? Oh my god, I have to report this video right now. Yeah, but cats can fall a really long way and land on their feet. I don't know how they, they take a good shock. They apparently can, like, their head, if you put a cinder block on it and then step on it, it can like, it won't crush. Like, their head can thin out to like paper thin. I've never heard that one.
Starting point is 00:21:07 Because it isn't true. And if anybody's listening and is stupid enough to actually believe it, then now you know what your IQ level is probably nothing to brag about. I mean, ours isn't either, but if you actually believe that, then there's something you need to go get checked out. I saw a video of a cockroach and how they can fit through small spaces and and get flat and everything it was really disturbing and disgusting it was a cockroach in a tube and it was being crushed until the point where it didn't get hurt and they get they can they can go through the tiniest holes and flatten
Starting point is 00:21:42 themselves and it's so fucking gross. Ew. That's how they get inside. They get through, like, the sides of windows and shit. It's disgusting. You can't keep them out. They're so fucking... I'm just glad that we don't have them at where we live. God, I'm not going to do this, but we're doing the soup video very soon. We are.
Starting point is 00:22:00 And what would be your reaction if I just had a dead cockroach floating in the middle of the soup? I wouldn't even touch it. But what if it was a clean cockroach that I bought from a store? You can't buy a clean cockroach. I can kill one and then clean it myself. No, you can't. What if I get one of those lollipops with a cockroach or whatever? They don't make the ones that have the cockroaches in them as far as I know.
Starting point is 00:22:22 Usually it's crickets or scorpions. What if I just put a little cricket, like a bunch of crickets in it? Then I dress the cricket up as a cockroach. I gave him a little cockroach costume. Well, I would do two things. I would applaud you
Starting point is 00:22:37 for your dedication and just the... To get like a grasshopper in a cockroach costume. The fact that you went through all of grasshopper and a cockroach costume the fact that you went through all of that effort to make a cockroach costume and put it on a cricket and then I would also just not eat the soup
Starting point is 00:22:53 oh okay fine yeah I just spent a lot of time making the soup well if you put bugs in it I'm not gonna eat it but bugs have protein yeah okay well people are like Well, if you put bugs in it, I'm not going to eat it. Bugs have protein. Yeah, okay, well, people are like, oh, bugs have protein. Yeah, but no more protein than like, I can have a protein bar, like an energy bar, and get like five times that amount.
Starting point is 00:23:17 That's not natural, though. I saw some guy online long ago that was talking like, I can drink my cum, and it's a lot of protein. And the person's like, yeah, but you can also just eat like a fish filet and get twice the amount. Why would you? And the guy was defending it like, well, no, it's. Was this your youth pastor? No. Yeah. We were all in a group. He said, guys, you can drink your cum. It's protein. And it's not a sin. No, there are multiple people online in this group trying to say like, well, no, but you can look, it's protein. It's natural. It's like, yeah, but it's not, it's not like it's not a sin. No, there are multiple people online in this group trying to say like, well, no, but you can look, it's protein. It's natural.
Starting point is 00:23:46 It's like, yeah, but it's not like it's so protein enriched that you're not going to get that protein. I can go drink a protein shake. I can buy for $2.99 at the gas station and get twice that amount. You can think of Popeye instead of like pulling out triumphantly like that thing of spinach. It's just like he pulls down his pants, strokes his cock. A little spittle of cum comes out. He goes, boom, boom, boom. The buzz is da-da-da-da.
Starting point is 00:24:14 Or like in another episode, it'll pan into like a bathroom. And he's just giving like that whatever the guy with the black beard. Just like a big, just a blowy. What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, boom, boom, bah! Oh, man. I think Popeye was gay. I don't know. He sure was overcompensating a lot of the times. And his arms were, his arms were fucking huge, dude.
Starting point is 00:24:34 His arms were, uh, something wrong with his arms. I think Family Guy made a joke about it. It's like Family Guy and Robot Chicken, I think. About the tumors on his arms? Yeah. Because I was about to make a joke, and then I was like, wait a second. That's, I think that's already been done and then i remembered uh back to my family guy days so my family guy days dark time in my life yeah we were just talking with brent
Starting point is 00:24:55 and he was like is family guy a good show we were just all like no it's not you know his exact his exact words were do we like family guy oh yeah do we like family Guy? Yeah, do we like Family Guy? He's like, no. I think, as I said, South Park is, it's probably the popular thing to say, and everybody loves South Park, but it's true. There's a reason, because it's fucking great. I haven't seen any of the recent seasons.
Starting point is 00:25:18 I haven't watched South Park in ages. I don't know why. It holds up. Probably because we don't have cable, and that was the only, I'll be honest, dude. I kind of wish we had cable. I love just kind of flipping through the channels and watching TV.
Starting point is 00:25:29 Putting something on. Hey, if we make more money. When we ditch our current internet provider because there's something way better that we could get, we can look into cable and see what a package would cost. Why are we... We've been wanting to switch for months. Why have we not just done that? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:25:43 I don't know. They sucked. Too much work. I don't want to name for months. Why have we not just done that? I don't know. I don't know. They sucked. Too much work. I don't wanna name- I don't wanna name drop them. I'm sorry, my sister just texted me that Ben Carson's getting a position. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Bullshit. Yes! Yes! What? Ryan, high five!
Starting point is 00:25:57 What? No, no, no. Where'd- no, we need to fact check this shit. Yeah, fact check it. I don't know. I don't have my phone. Where's my phone? Well, I would look it up if my phone wasn't- Hold on. Incredibly broken. Hold on. Where'd she find this. I don't have my phone. Where's my phone? Well, I would look it up if my phone wasn't incredibly broken. Hold on. Where'd she find this? Okay, I got my phone out. He's getting director of
Starting point is 00:26:10 brain surgery and drunkenness. God damn it. My phone. I have big old thubs and then I have a small ass phone. Ben Carson. Donald Trump? I don't know. Ben Carson expects announcement on Trump administration role soon, one hour ago.
Starting point is 00:26:30 Ben Carson hints at potential nomination for Trump cabinet post. I thought he was going to make him like the Surgeon General or something. As housing secretary? Housing secretary? I don't know. Don't take this as fact. It's like Donald Trump close to picking. I don't think he's actually picked anything yet.
Starting point is 00:26:49 If you could make a dream team, Ryan, if you were president, who would you pick for your team? Anyone, Ryan. Anyone. Who would you pick just to create the most just havoc? Like where the public is genuinely just, what the fuck? Then I'd have to say... Politics aside, who could you pick that people would just be shocked and you would run the country straight into the ground?
Starting point is 00:27:19 Secretary of State would be Dakota Fanning. Because she was in War of the Worlds. Her sister is so hot. Ella Fanning? Yeah. She's a beautiful woman. She's a very pretty young lady. She's 18, right? I don't know. Now I have to check
Starting point is 00:27:36 for you. I'm assuming she's older than 18. I just know she's around my age and I can't be saying that if she's not. She was in Super 8. Is that how you found out about her? Yeah. Hold on. Ella Fanning. She is 18. Woo! Alright. She just turned 18
Starting point is 00:27:51 recently. Really? Not just turned 18 but she uh. Okay well I'm in the clear. I'm in the clear. Cool. You are in the clear. She was born in 98. So. Yeah but who would you pick as your dream team? I told you I got... Just Dakota Fanning?
Starting point is 00:28:07 Yeah. Who would you choose? Secretary of State? I'd probably do Carrot Top. For my UN ambassador? I'd probably pick... I gotta have Bill Cosby in there somewhere. Oh my god. But he has to always be doing the Fat Albert voice. There's a lot of good people. I'd probably pick George
Starting point is 00:28:32 Michaels from Wham. The fuck is that? I don't know, he's just... What's Wham? Are you serious? What's Wham? What's Wham? What do you mean what's Wham? I mean what the fuck is Wham? That's exactly what I mean. Is this... You don't know what Wham is? Is this mean, what's Wham? I mean, what the fuck is Wham? That's exactly what I mean. You don't know what Wham is? Is this one of those things where you don't know, and you're like, what do you mean you don't know what Wham is? Everybody knows what Wham is. I'm gonna look it up. Wham.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Oh my god. Ryan. Uh. This? Yes. Wham. I don't know. What do they do?
Starting point is 00:29:03 Wake me up before you go. Okay, I know the songs. I don't know the fucking name do? Wake me up before you go Okay I know the songs I don't know the fucking name of the band George Michaels I don't know George Michaels he's so famous he's huge I'm sorry you're pissing your pants about this Guys he's crying He's spittering
Starting point is 00:29:19 He's like sputtering in his pants I'm sputtering in my pants I'm gonna sputter I just sputtered my pants dude i was making out with this chick last week and it was so hot that i sputtered my pants dude i think i think she did a little sprinkle as well i'm gonna sprinkle you know i'm gonna do something i haven't done on the podcast before i'm gonna go to twitter and go to news or whatever you know the thing where it's like trending shit trending topics i just want
Starting point is 00:29:45 to see if there's anything interesting going on moments today target star studded lineup of spect oh that's a promotion yeah that's an advert that wasn't whoa i just laughed and farted at the same time happy 24th birthday miley cyrus wow how jk rowling got the harry potter birthday, Miley Cyrus. Wow. How J.K. Rowling got the Harry Po- This sounds like BuzzFeed. Wait, what is this? Brad Pitt will face no charges
Starting point is 00:30:12 as FBI closes investigation? On what? What did Brad Pitt do? An allegation altercation with one of his children on a private plane. Like he hit his kids or something? I don't know. I'm not gonna spread rumors. Uh, oh!
Starting point is 00:30:28 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, Matt. Yeah. Have you seen the trailer for Martin Scorsese's new movie, Silence? I haven't. About Christians going to Japanese infested Japan. I like Japan, but it's so Japanese infested. I know!
Starting point is 00:30:44 No, I haven't. I saw a screenshot from it. It's got a little Andrew Garfield in. And it's so Japanese and custom. I know. No, I haven't. I saw a screenshot from it. It's got a little Andrew Garfield in. And it's got Liam Neeson. We saw Andrew Garfield in person. Driver. Adam Driver. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:30:53 Oh. I could check it out. That sounds like an interesting movie. The trailer looked really good. I'll have to watch that afterwards. In fact, I might be, today after this podcast, I might actually be purchasing a plane ticket to the land of Japan to go visit my buddy who's going to be living over there. What's his name? Christian.
Starting point is 00:31:13 What's his real name? Christian. No, he knows what I mean, but what's his name? Oh, Flynn, yeah. His nickname, Flynn? Yeah. Yeah, he goes by Flynn for some reason. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:31:24 Okay. How do you spell that in Japanese? Fudin. Yeah, he loves going by Flynn, though. He gets everyone to call him that for some reason. You used to tell me you used to have a bunch of friends that were, like, I guess were exchange students or something, and you'd make them say, like, curse words? Yeah, well, I didn't make them they they didn't know how to use that's that's the thing is like they have a good english education and they're they were all surprisingly and one of
Starting point is 00:31:54 one of my friends but when it comes to slang they're just not yeah they don't they don't know anything about it but one of my friends he was almost fully fluent and i was like how long have you been learning english and he's like five months and I was like what the what they're they pick it up so fast but um they I was at like a coffee shop with a bunch of Japanese exchange students a lot of uh a couple friends of mine from Japan and they didn't they were curious because they don't know how to say fuck they don't know when you use it like what it's used for so that was one of the best conversations of my life getting to explain to foreigners different variations of the word fuck. How to use it.
Starting point is 00:32:27 Because it's such a... Fuck is a word. Fuck is one of the greatest words in the English language. And I sound like a 6th grader when I... Oh my god, dude. Fuck is such a good word. But think about all the... And it has so many uses.
Starting point is 00:32:37 It's so expressive. Noun, pronoun, adverb, adjective. I mean... Verb, everything. Like, it's... It's incredible. Yeah. A verb ending in I-N-G.'s it's incredible a verb ending in ing hello mad libs but a number that begins
Starting point is 00:32:50 with the letter f fuck five Matt five fuck isn't a number well I put it down okay but uh they'd be like motherfucker motherfucker fucking it was just fun listening did you point and laugh at him i did i said
Starting point is 00:33:06 you you're stupid you're not american you sound funny you don't sound normal but i remember i got them to say um we were we were like giving each other hard words to say and i gave them make them say i saw this on reddit and that's where i got the idea a long time ago but um try to get them to say lar Parallelogram Larry Parallelogram Larry Parallelogram Larry Parallelogram Larry Parallelogram It's funny because
Starting point is 00:33:37 What is it? What's the rule? What's the like They're kind of like Why is it hard for them? Well they can't There's no L And there's no R
Starting point is 00:33:44 Really It's like It's a different Well it's not like the English R. It's an R, but it's not like. The R is very different. Yeah. Like the sound. In English, it's R, R like that. We have R and we have L, R and L,
Starting point is 00:33:56 but in Japanese, they have neither, and they have a sound that's like da, da, da, like that. So trying to say R and L, just kind of, unless you're really good at it um you know because you you you didn't grow up knowing or learning that sound so you you end up just saying it how your brain knows how to say it so it translates it to like you know instead of saying larry you say daddy then parallelogram parallelogram parallelogram there's actually a book I wish
Starting point is 00:34:28 I wanna just I just wanna have a talk show where everyday we go out into the streets and find like little Asian people and get them to say
Starting point is 00:34:36 funny words and then point and laugh at them no just point and laugh oh just look and there's one oh I bet you
Starting point is 00:34:44 I bet you smell bad. What? That had nothing to do with being Asian. I was just trying to be mean. You get mad when I fart. What? That wasn't me. That was Ryan.
Starting point is 00:34:56 Wasn't me? Liar? Wow. Does it smell? Is it stinky? It smells like canned dog food. I can't say that. That doesn't sound like it smells bad it doesn't smell good
Starting point is 00:35:09 but um I realize that when I do that on a podcast I'm broadcasting my flatulence to like the entire world you know something that 99% of the population are terrified to do in front of anybody.
Starting point is 00:35:26 And then you and I just kind of do it in the microphone. You and I also appear nude. Yeah. A lot. Or we used to. We don't really do that much anymore. We dropped a lot of stuff from the beginning of the channel. I'm not saying we dropped the nudity.
Starting point is 00:35:39 I'm sure it's going to come back. But there's certain things that we just dropped. Which I'm kind of glad we dropped. Well, there's things that are funny for a certain amount of time and then they're not funny anymore otherwise you know if you if you keep doing the same thing people get tired of it it's just like i never wanted kind of like a catchphrase type thing i didn't want to be known as like people with a catchphrase and we kind of made one yeah but we don't really use we have not we have not said yes yes yes or daddy or or daddy
Starting point is 00:36:07 likes in in what four months i don't know the last time we said it but it's shocking how prevalent it's rampant like i see it every day on twitter and stuff every video it's yes people are like when are you gonna make a yes yes yes shirt and i mean the honest answer is probably we won't so go ham and make your own have a fun little art project make your be be be unique go ahead have your own unique shirt and make it we're not we're not your pictures we will we will eventually do merchandise like t-shirts and and stickers remember we said that a lot of this stuff isn't gonna happen till 2017 though we just have a lot to get through when it comes uh with the holidays with game grumps and
Starting point is 00:36:42 super mega recording and everything like that yeah but but like i know we've been saying this for a while but we we do have merch um that we are eventually going to do we just need to nail down the best way to make merch or the most distributed yeah the best way whether that means going through a website or um uh weaving them ourself yeah Yeah. Weaving a shirt. Not sewing one. Or you can make Super Mega weave. Oh, God. Like, basically, when all the weave is down on a woman, it shows our logo and it's yellow.
Starting point is 00:37:16 Yellow weave. That would just look like some gross SpongeBob deformed bullshit. What would SpongeBob look like if he had weave? Can white people wear weave? I'm sure they can. It's just extra hair, isn't it? But, if he had weave? Can white people wear weave? I'm sure they can. It's just extra hair, isn't it? But I mean, like, do white people wear weave? I'm sure, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:31 I thought old people wore weaves before anyone else. Okay, wait, what even is weave? Is weave just, like, hair that you tie to your other hair? I don't know how it works. I thought that's what that was. I'm going to look it up now. What is a weave? What is a...
Starting point is 00:37:45 I love when you're walking down the street or something, or you're just somewhere in public, and you find a little bit of weave on the ground. You're just like, yep, someone lost some weave. You ever seen that video of the big woman on the swing set, and she flies out of the swing, like big, very large African-American woman, and she jumps off the swing, and she goes flying,
Starting point is 00:38:06 and she hits the ground, and her weave just flies off 100%. I think it was on Tosh.0 many years ago. It's very funny. Weave is pretty much hair extensions. Just hair extensions. On Urban Dictionary, it said, mostly used by black women and
Starting point is 00:38:22 celebrities. Black women and celebrities. So, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp. God, Brad Pitt looks great with weave. He does. That's why the FBI's investigating him, because he looks too good in weave. There are celebrities where I'm just kind of looking at them and I'm like, just, your time's
Starting point is 00:38:38 up. Stop looking good. Like, why do you still look decent? Like, Tom Cruise still looks good. A little something called plastic surgery. Keanu Reeves. Oh, yeah. Okay. I wonder how often those celebrities get.
Starting point is 00:38:49 It's got to be multiple times a year, probably. But I could never be talked into doing that shit, man. I'd be scared that I'd turn out like one of the horror stories. Yeah, like, what's her name? God. What's her name again? Dolly Parton? Dolly Parton.
Starting point is 00:39:02 Joan. Oh, Joan Rivers? Yeah, Joan Rivers. Like, before she died, she looked like just. What's her name again? Dolly Parton? Joan Rivers? Yeah, Joan Rivers. Before she died, she looked like just... I mean, no disrespect to her at all, but... She made fun of herself. She was one of those people where plastic surgery didn't go too well because you can really see it.
Starting point is 00:39:17 Because, I mean, the point of plastic surgery is to look better and not look like a doll. Isn't it to just stretch the wrinkles out? Yeah, basically just kind of like stretching your skin or lifting parts of your face. But, I mean, it's a face you have. It's a face you're given. You can't change it.
Starting point is 00:39:33 There's things about my face I wish I could change. But aging looks cool. It does, yeah. It's like a... It's like, look. Look at what I've been through. I've gone through life. It's like watching a mountain range form.
Starting point is 00:39:46 Yeah. Especially, uh... I forgot what I was gonna say. You forgot? Yeah. We have to go to hell and find what Matt was gonna say! Why do we have to go to hell to find that? I don't know, that's the typical, like,
Starting point is 00:40:01 oh no, now we have to go travel to hell. Harold and Kumar go to hell. I'd watch that movie. I've seen every Harold and Kumar movie. I never saw the Christmas one. That was, it was 3D. Hey, I mean, well, actually, I guess I could see it now because it's about to be the Christmas season, so. It is the season.
Starting point is 00:40:20 It is the Christmas season because it starts so damn early now. I don't mind. We've talked about this. It doesn't matter. It's Christmas. It doesn't matter to me early now. I don't mind. We've talked about this. It doesn't matter. It's Christmas. It doesn't matter to me at all. I'm fine with it coming early. What's your favorite Christmas song?
Starting point is 00:40:31 Oh, God. I don't know. There's so many fucking good ones. It almost is like whatever fits the mood. But I think one of my favorites is definitely Feliz Navidad. Oh, it's so nostalgic to me. Holy shit. Feliz Navidad. Feliz Navidad. Oh, it's so nostalgic to me. Holy shit. Feliz Navidad.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Feliz Navidad. Comprero aƱos y felicidad. I probably got some Spanish wrong there. But, dude, um, God, wow, that song is nostalgic back to, like, elementary school for me, actually. That's when I loved that song the most. My favorite Christmas song is by Wham. Last Christmas I gave you my heart. That's my I love that song the most. My favorite Christmas song is by Wham. Last Christmas, I gave you my heart. That's my favorite Christmas song.
Starting point is 00:41:10 Sounds like a teen girl, like a mean girl's Christmas holiday special thing. They would use it in that. I don't know if I already said this on a podcast, but when I was younger, in that song, they say, you know, the line is um this year to save me from tears but when i was a kid i always thought they said this year something like chevy frontier like the truck so i always thought they were just singing about a chevy frontier in that part of the song well it's almost like uh you know the song where it's like uh i carved my name into his leather seats. Yeah. I always thought she said, I carved my name into his legacy. And I thought that sounded cooler because it's like, he cheated on me. So I'm going to like fuck up his car.
Starting point is 00:41:52 And like, because like he was emotionally attached to me at one point, blah, blah, blah. I'm going to carve my name into his legacy and he'll never forget me. But that honestly makes more sense. It was carve my name into his leather seats. Yeah. This year, I'll carve my name into his leather seats yeah this year i'll carve my name into his leather seats and also this year i found a i think i've discovered a new top christmas song of mine which i've never really like paid attention to until this year i heard it and i'm like this is
Starting point is 00:42:16 a really good song it's the one that's like this christmas a very special Christmas This year You know that song? No I'm sure if you heard it I probably would My singing's not doing a very good Yeah How this Christmas
Starting point is 00:42:32 It played when we were getting sushi With Jack and Aaron and Susie Oh yeah Remember? Okay yeah yeah yeah How this Christmas It just doesn't have a big foothold in my brain It's a good song though
Starting point is 00:42:44 It's a fucking great song I like all the classics Oh yeah I like Jingle Bell Rock Christmas Jingle Bell Jingle Bell Jingle Bell Rock
Starting point is 00:42:52 And then I like It's not even Christmas And we're starting to do this shit Well I mean By the time people listen to this It'll be Thanksgiving so Yeah So it'll be
Starting point is 00:43:00 Perfectly Perfectly fine by then For people to Listen to Christmas music. Unless you have not had your Thanksgiving feast yet, then don't listen to this. Turn it off. Go eat your fucking Thanksgiving. I'm sure.
Starting point is 00:43:14 Your roast beast, as the Grinch would say. On Christmas, my family always makes prime rib. Like mashed potatoes and prime rib or prime roast. I don't know. I think it's prime roast, prime rib. I don't know. It's really good though. Do you mix your foods when you eat them?
Starting point is 00:43:33 Yeah. I think it's so good. Like if you have steak, mashed potatoes, and like some toast, you take like you take you put your fork in the steak, dip it in your mashed potatoes, then eat that, then take a bite of your toast and all those things in one. Yeah, it mixes all together into one delicious thing. Oh, I love it. It's weird because I like mixing foods together in my mouth, but not on the plate.
Starting point is 00:43:53 Like, I wouldn't mix. Yeah, not on the plate. Thank you, everyone, for joining us in this super mega podcast. We had a grand old time just talking, chilling here with you boys girls and liking alike everyone listening whether you celebrate Thanksgiving or not hope you have a great day spend some time with your family
Starting point is 00:44:13 or don't I know I won't be or just stay in your room and listen to us for some reason you should be ashamed of yourself if that's what you're doing you're a despicable human being however eat some good food have have a good time, watch some football, do whatever you want to do. Feliz Navidad. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:34 Proro Agnese Felizidad.

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