supermegashow - EP 68 - Corporate Bologna

Episode Date: November 13, 2017

We talk PUBG adventures, the meat industry, and Ryan needs advice for his insane pooch. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Switching things up Sitting on this side of the couch Changing sides Usually I sit on the left side of the couch During podcasts, Ryan sits on the right side But guess what guys, this is Tom sitting on the right side Ryan's sitting on the left side And this is episode 68 of Super Megacast

Yes it is Look at that. You know what the next episode is? No. Well, what comes next? You can take a guess. Uh, wait, okay. This one's 68. Um... Oh! 69! 69! Dude! Yes! Yes!

High five! Another one! One more! One more! Another one! One more! Another one! One more high five! Memes! Oh man! Anyways, what an obnoxious way to start the podcast. Welcome to the Super Mega Cast slash Super Mega Podcast, whichever one you feel like saying. One sounds a little more mature, I guess.

I think the Super Mega Podcast sounds more mature. Of course, yes. But, you know, Super Mega Cast... Is the name of the podcast. Yeah, we came up with that when we were 14 years old. It was easy to come up with the name because the channel is Super Mega. And just put cast at the end.

That's so easy. It's like the easiest thing. So, we have a lot of new updates. One of the bigger ones is that our boy Tucker is staying with us, so we have a new body in the household. Oh, he's not just staying with us. He's living with us. Well, I say, I say, I don't want to say staying with us, so we have a new body in the household. Oh, he's not just staying with us. He's living with us.

Well, I don't want to say living with us quite yet, because I feel like when we all three go in on a house, then we'll all be living together. Because right now, I don't think it's fair to say he's living as much as we are, because he's on our couch, and he has to use our bathroom. That's true. You and I are living, because we we got our own rooms. But Tucker has officially moved out to LA

so expect more shit with Tucker. More podcast episodes with Tucker and more live action stuff because he loves shooting that little camera. He loves shooting things with his little tiny camera. We've also been

playing a lot of PUBG recently. Yes, we have. We played, let's see, usually it's a squad of Matt, Tucker, and I, and then we try to find a fourth person to fill it up. So far we've gotten Christian, Matt's friend Christian, and our big boy Brent. Brent, our boss. We played with Brent last night, and that was like one of the greatest rounds I think I've ever

played in that game. Yes. We were number two as a team. We were so lucky as to get inside of a building that the circle was zoning in on every single time. We were always inside of it, held up in this house.

We had a bunch of weapons, like shotguns. It was great. Automatic machines We were always inside of it, held up in this house. We had a bunch of weapons, like shotguns. It was great. Fucking automatic. Automatic machines of weaponry. Guns. Explosions. It got down to the point where we took a couple people out outside, and then the four of us were in this house,

and the circle shrunk down to the smallest circle right around the house, and then there were two people left. It was the four of us versus two people. And then the circle shrunk again right outside the house. It went into essentially our backyard. So we're like, easy. It's four of us against two people that are outside. We just gotta go outside and shoot them.

That's easy. So the circle shrinks and we're like, fuck, it's closing in. We gotta run. So I run out the door almost immediately. I don't know where they were but they they shoot they were behind a dumpster yeah i didn't see them i was shooting at them and then uh i saw it and all of a sudden i noticed the circle was closing and i'm like okay so i run to get out of the house because you die pretty quickly now yeah like right when i was in yeah they updated it so the force field kills you like super fast now and then brent was standing in the stairwell.

So he was blocking my way to get out of the house. And I'm like, I literally freaked out. I was like, Brent, Brent, what the fuck? He's like, what, what, what, what, what's going on? I'm like, did the force field kill you? Yeah, the force field. Because I couldn't get out of the house in time because Brent's big fat ass was blocking the door. Then I got, did Tucker get shot too or did he get killed by the force field? Oh my God. that's a lot

of sulfur. Oh, sorry, I got distracted by a silent little boy. What, something about Tucker. How did Tucker die? Did he get shot? Probably. I think he died alongside you and then I died by the force field and so did

good old Brent. So it got down to one person versus a squad of four and he won yeah mainly because of our incompetence because the circle was closing in and it just it caught us so off guard so I had to run and because the circle was closing in we should have all rushed him there's no way he could have killed us all if we rushed him I know

like if we all just flanked him and shit like one left right straight yeah two straight left right I think my my my error was i didn't know i had to get out of the house fast and i didn't know where uh the other person was so i just ran out without knowing where they were which allowed them to just effectively just take me out real quick usually i don't like pub g but i think that's just because uh i don't like playing by myself with a squad squad, it's super fun. Because when we're playing with a squad, I was telling you this,

and you're on your computer. Sorry. I threw up a little in my mouth. Just spit it out, baby. You're playing on your computer. Tucker's playing on his. I'm playing on mine. We're in three separate rooms.

We're talking on Discord. It reminded me a lot of my Halo 3 Call of Duty days back in middle school and high school, I guess. Yeah, yeah. It's really fun. It's – I didn't think I'd like it so much. Just sitting down and like playing PUBG with friends because I've never like actually played it. I played it with Chris once and then I've never played with friends after that.

Yeah. So playing it with like a whole squad, it's the most fun shit ever i'm like fully re i was adding maps too yeah they're adding two new maps i was addicted to the game when it first came out for like a day and a half because uh i had to fly to japan like the next like two days after it came out so i got to play it a little bit um and then i had to go to japan and then afterwards i played a little bit here and there and then then when I went back to South Carolina, I got back into it. And that's the first time Tucker played because he was there. And first time he ever played,

he got number two by himself. So that was impressive. But usually every time we play, we get in the top ten. Top ten, yeah. Every time. Like our team rank, at least. Like we've got two, three, four, and then we've got like... We've gotten two twice. We got two in one day. Yeah, yeah.

Well, two times in one day. We gotta win once. It's coming up. I feel like maybe in the next two weeks, we're gonna get a win. It's gonna be a mixture of luck. Like, we're gonna be in a car. Like, this guy's gonna be shooting at us, and he's gonna shoot the driver. The driver's gonna die, but the

car's gonna continue to roll with some of us in the backseat, and the guy shooting the car's gonna to continue to roll with some of us in the back seat and the guy shooting the car is going to die and then we're going to win. It's going to be some shit like that. I think the most satisfying way to kill people in that game is running them over with a car. Because you took a big circle around this group one time

just to come from behind them and kill three in one. Well, that wasn't even my plan. In one swoop. Tucker and I were playing. Ryan, you were taking Lego out, I think. Yeah. So, Tucker and I played around. And we were at the top of a hill, and I was in a car, and Tucker was next to the car. And there were, like, two people

at the bottom of the hill shooting up at us. So, I was like, ah, fuck it. Tucker, watch this. So, I drove down the hill really fast at them. And then they disappeared, and I'm like, oh, shit. I don't see them. They must have crouched. So, I spun around. So, I was, don't see them. They must have crouched. So I spun around. So I was like facing them

and they just ignored me, popped back up and started shooting up the hill at Tucker. So I just sped and I drove right through them. And then apparently there was a third person I didn't see that was with them. So I killed three people in one quick.

But also I think what we might start doing, if you guys are into it, let us know. We're thinking about possibly recording some of our games. It'd be different from, like, regular Super Mega videos. Okay, think about it. Remember when we used to do Grand Theft Auto compilations? Yeah, yeah. It would be kind of like that.

Also, the mic quality wouldn't be the best. Yeah, it'd be shitty because it'd be Discord audio. But, like, it'd be a different type of video from our regular Let's Plays. But Ryan and I think it'd be fun if we started uploading some some pub g videos where it'd be we basically like upload around kind of cut out the fluff and just keep in like a good continuous story with the best keeping the narrative of the round and um you know might might upload a couple of those because we really genuinely enjoy playing this game and a lot of fun shit happens so uh if you guys would like to see those oh yes stop recording yeah i've never heard brent laugh

the way he laughed before like i've never heard it i didn't know we were like is that brent i can't repeat the joke unfortunately it was uh it was a beauty pie joke but i was making fun of the way tucker's character looked it was not it was not was not a, not a race thing. No. FYI. Just because I know everyone's like, what did Ryan say? If you can't repeat it. And it was about appearances.

It was just mean spirited. It was very mean spirited. But it was, Brent was like, I know. Brent has a high pitch laugh. Yeah. When he really gets into it,

it's like a little type of like tropical parrot. He couldn't stop. He was going on. I was like, damn. Okay. It was like breaking up over Discord. It was, I wish I was like, because he was like breaking up over Discord like it was

I wish I was like because apparently OBS like if you run out of space just fucks up the file and stops recording and I downloaded

Handbrake hoping to save it but you need to send your computer in get it upgraded or upgrade it yourself yeah I just need to

I need to buy a a bigger I gotta buy a new hard drive but anyways guys that's the that's the those are the stories that come with

this new independent game that not many people know about called PUBG that we're enjoying. Absolutely. Like, more people should check it out and give it some love. One person in the comments is heading to the...

What the fuck? No, no. They won't complete it because this is happening so soon after. Or maybe they're blocking me out right now. They started typing and when they closed, they're like, fuck it,

they're messing with me. No, they're typing and right now all they're hearing is... But if you're still paying attention it was a joke i wasn't i don't actually think pub g is an independent uh game absolutely not but that that is the one joke explanation for this podcast okay we know we know uh a few of you need it well i i wish you hadn't wasted it then ryan because what if we make a joke later that needs explaining and we can't explain the joke?

Got some splaining to do. What's that from? Lucy, you got some splaining to do. I don't even remember it from the show. I watch the show a little bit, but I just remember it from the Weird Al song. Hey, Ricky, you're so da-da-da-da-da-da-da. I just know it from

that video that's like 10 years old of the guy that kind of looks like John Stamos. And he's doing like 101 voices. And he's like, I'm the man of 101 voices. And he just does a bunch of impressions. And one of them is he goes, Lucy, you've got some splaining to do. Lucy, you've got some splaining to do. Was that, you know, Lucille Ball? Did you know Lucille Ball was a commie?

I've never said that before. She was a communist. Is she a redheaded commie? She wrote it even on her voter registration thing. She's a communist. And she was in Hollywood. That's a dangerous time to say you're a communist. That's unfortunate.

I think at that time it was just... It was like the Red Scare. Yeah. McCarthyism and shit. Was she blacklisted after probably i mean what else like well i don't know she was such a big still alive no she's not alive she had such a big career it's just weird that like she wasn't black maybe she was blacklisted who knows but i i used to watch i love luc all the time. I watched it in, like, I watched my first episode in, like, eighth grade drama class. No, sorry, seventh grade drama class. I wasn't in drama class in eighth grade. Okay, yeah.

Ryan was in an eighth grade drama class last week. He went and sat in and viewed it. What if we just started showing up at, like, schools? Like, hey, could we sit in some of the lectures? Like, no. showing up at like schools like hey could we sit in some of the lectures like no look i want to go to a grade school like a history class or a science class like something super easy and do my best to teach the lesson like i can't just make up bullshit i have to like when i'm teaching people about uh the uh the structure of a cell i gotta talk about mitochondria the powerhouse of a cell. I got to talk about mitochondria. The powerhouse of the cell.

The ribosomes. Ribosomes. You got to get that cell membrane in there. What else is in the cell? You got to get your nucleus. Yeah, nucleus. And then there's a nucleosis, right? Yes.

And then there's a... Whoa, are we talking about an animal cell or a plant cell here? Well, we're talking about a plant cell. And you know there's a little chloroform. I'm sorry, chlorophyll. Cell wall and all that. You got the cell wall. Well, we're talking about a plant cell and you know there's a little chloroform. I'm sorry, chlorophyll. Cell wall and all that? You got the cell wall. Yeah. You got DNA

and RNA. Fuck. Dude, we remember our high school education shit. I know that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. Are the ribosomes little bean-shaped things? Yeah. Okay. I don't know what they do, though. Aren't they kind of like, they're the food?

They provide nutrients? I have no idea. Like they're little packets of nutrients for the cell? I don't know. Dude isn't that fucking crazy like we're made up of tiny little like factories essentially that are super intricate like we're made up of billions and billions of these little like

complete packages that work processes all day and like eat shit and produce waste and like work and have different like components and shit we're made up of that and that's what we are and then that whole community this whole civilization that we are made up of there's a nuclear power plant at the top which is our brain that has a bunch of chemical reactions that make no goddamn sense every now and then. Dude, the body, when you think about it, the human body, not just the human body, just like animals and plants, like, that's fucking insane.

Yeah. Like, think about it on that level. Like, it's just blowing my mind, you know? It sounds like I'm high, and I'm like, dude, the human body. Dude! It's amazing. We're made up of fucking cells, dude! I just don't think about it that often.

Whoa! I thought about it, I'm like, dude. I just don't think about it that often. Whoa. I thought about it. I'm like, whoa. Like you're riding a roller coaster. Whoa. Dude, I'm riding the roller coaster of life right now. This is fucking sweet, bro. Whoa.

Hey, dude. Yeah. You ever think that your brain is like a fucking nuclear reactor, bro? Because you know how they say that your brain reacts like chemical reactions like love oh shit like love and hate and sadness what if what if our brain is just a giant nuclear factory you know what i'm saying dude what if like your whole body is like it's like a city and like your book like your brain is like town hall I'm coming I'm coming

like your liver is I'm seeping out of my penis what? what? dude like and like your dude your butthole's like a like a

like a dump where they dump the trash and like your heart your heart's like the civic center dude like what wasn't that crazy? your feet are

your feet are like public transportation bro dude it's like the infrastructure bro center, dude? Like, wasn't that crazy? Ugh, your feet are your feet are like public transportation, bro. It's like the infrastructure, bro. Your nipples are like a Oh, fuck. It's like a dairy plant, you know what I'm saying? Yeah.

Dude, I could use some Dairy Queen right now. Oh, fuck, bro. Get your mom in here. What the fuck, bro? Don't fuck, dude. boys. What are you doing? Nothing dad nothing nothing just hanging out. Can I have a hit boys? Dad sure sure dad dad yeah here, okay boys Jesus Christ this isn't your daddy's cabbage I This isn't your daddy's cabbage I feel like that's what every adult says about

The stuff they got nowadays Is nothing like what we had in the 70s It's so much stronger My therapist said that He was like, Matty, the stuff they got these days Ain't nothing like what we had It ain't your mother's marijuana It ain't your grandma's marijuana

I love that Mike's Hard Lemonade and like what we had. It ain't your mother's marijuana. It ain't your grandma's marijuana. I love that like Mike's Hard Lemonade. It's like, it's not your mother's lemonade. It's not horrible. No, I actually, I like Mike's Hard Lemonade. I drink it because I'm a bitch and I like ciders and Mike's Hard Lemonade. It doesn't make you a bitch. I hate the stigma that it's like

fruity alcoholic beverages makes you a bitch. It's like, no, it tastes good. So when you drink a Fanta, are you a little bitch? Because you're drinking a fruity drink? Yeah. It's like no it tastes good like so so so when you drink a fanta are you a little bitch because you're drinking a fruity uh drink yeah it's like when i go to mcdonald's it's like can i get a sprite it's like wow little bitch you like fruity drinks it's like what is it because alcohol is supposed to be like this manly like dude i down straight whiskey by no i think it comes to beer like people, guys drink wine and shit. I love wine. I had wine last night. White wine is... I had white wine last night.

It was tasty. Yeah. Oh, let's, let's, uh, oh, shit. Let's talk about that movie. Hold on. We went and saw a movie. We saw Killing of a Sacred Deer.

Yeah. That movie, I just want to start off by saying that movie really tripped me out because I got that, I got that big thing of white wine at the movie theater. Yes.

I drank it pretty quickly. So that whole movie... And it is a weird movie. Yeah, so I was... It thing of white wine at the movie theater and I drank it pretty quickly. And it is a weird movie. It's not like, because the director previously directed The Lobster, which the themes in that are a little more like obvious. And given to you. Not just the themes but like you can digest it a little

more easily than Killing of a Sacred Deer. Dude, Killing of a Sacred Deer I was like, what the fuck is this? Well, from the opening scene, I don't want to ruin anything, but from the very first shot of the film. It was very jarring. I know. Could we spoil it? Could we say just the first shot?

It's like, the movie opens on black, and it's playing music, and it's just black for a while. And then it just cuts to an up-close video of open heart surgery, of the heart pumping really up close to the camera, and it's just black for a while. And then it just cuts to an up-close video of open heart surgery. Of the heart pumping really up close to the camera. And it's really grotesque. And it goes on for a while while the classical music plays.

I'd say off the top of my head, the best parts about this film. Of course the acting. But to me, what stood out the most was the score and sound design. Oh yeah. And the writing. Yeah. Because he writes in a way where... We were all discussing this in a car.

Like, weird thoughts. Well, the characters... Like, in the real world, you know, you have people, blah, blah, blah. And, like, some of them... You know, we don't usually speak our inner thoughts that often or else we'd seem socially unaware. You know what I mean? You feel out what to say to be socially...

But in this writing style, it's just upfront and their inner dialogue comes out. No character is afraid to say what they need to say. It's like everything is... There's no being coy with the writer. how no character is afraid to say what they need to say. It's like everything is, there's no being coy. Right, and so much of the dialogue was just like, can I borrow your MP3 player? You already lost two.

I'm not lending you mine. And the dialogue was really awkward in the delivery, and I loved that about it. It could seem like a comical Cormac McCarthy type of dialogue. Like if Cormac McCarthy were to write a comedy. Because Cormac McCarthy writes in, I don't even know what to call the style, but I don't know if you've ever read a Cormac McCarthy book. As I'm starting to read more books, I want to read The Road because you say it's so good. I really want to read it.

The quotes or the dialogue isn't in quotations. It's think about this. A character says something. It's think about this. Character says something. It's just a line. Enter, enter. The next character's line. It doesn't say what character's saying it, like at least in the road.

Oh, that's cool. Because there's really only two characters in the road, in the father, son. And sometimes while I was reading, I'm like, wait, who's talking again? But it's very simple and kind of plain. Weird movie though. Really weird but i i enjoyed it i really did enjoy it yeah colin farrell was really good and my daughter had her first menstruation

yeah like he just like like it was just awkward like at dinner or like he'll be talking to his friend he'll be like my daughter had her first period this week congratulations it's weird but i loved it it was just a just a surreal, very surreal. I did not like it. I liked it more than Mother, but I didn't like it as much as The Lobster. The Lobster is still, I think, my favorite movie by this director so far. I did like it more than Mother as well. It's hard to recommend because while I was sitting there,

I could see this definitely isn't for a mass audience. This isn't for the people who went to go see Thor Ragnarok. It really, that movie, like I, I'm not saying anything like I, I enjoyed Thor Ragnarok. It was entertaining. I'm not saying those who enjoy it, it's a different kind of cinema. I'm saying this fine art, but there, there comes a point where there are movies that aren't, they're not easily digestible and you can't offer that up to a main audience who wants to go to a theater to

have fun and enjoy their time and probably not think that much yeah this one is like if i if i'm being honest i might sound stupid but most of this movie went over my head at a first watch i'd like i'm gonna have to go back and read to read about stuff to really figure out most of the shit. Because so much of it went over my head. And it could have been because I had a bit to drink. But a lot of it just kind of whoop. And I was like, hmm. I'm going to have to think about that one.

I enjoyed it because the suspense was good. Good suspense, yeah. As I said, the sound design, the acting. I liked it. I just don't think i'm gonna like i'm not itching to watch it again like i'm itching to talk about it with people who have seen it because it's one of those movies where it's like you can come up with your own interpretations blah blah blah but um at the end of the day it's uh it's a it's a kind of a rough ride sometimes. I think at least in the second act,

there was a bit of a lull for me. It's a bit of a tiring movie to watch in the sense that it's like, you gotta do a lot of thinking when you watch it. You can't just kind of tune out. You really gotta be piecing things together, and it's not a bad thing. I enjoyed it overall, though.

I thought it was really good. Yeah. Weird. I enjoyed it overall. I thought it was really good. I like weird movies. If you're one of the people that went out to see Mother because you were curious, you didn't even have to like it. If you saw The Lobster and liked it or if you were just curious and you enjoyed it, definitely go see this movie.

I'll put it this way. If you live in Columbia, South Carolina and you frequently visit the Nickelodeon Theater in downtown Columbia, you probably might want to at least check this out. Because I recommend it. I didn't feel like I wasted my money upon watching it. Yeah, exactly. Also, what I didn't get about the movie theater, I realized, was when we went to buy tickets,

there was an adult ticket, which was like $15.75. There's an infant ticket. And there was an infant ticket, which was just the same price as an adult ticket. You think it would say child. It says infant. Yeah. So did they change the age? So now it's like it has to be a tiny child. But I don't get why it's a separate ticket option when it's the exact same price as adult.

It's just like, why? It's like. Yeah. And also you would think infant would be also a discounted ticket because they can't comprehend or enjoy a movie so there's and they're they don't take up a seat usually most likely they're gonna cry too nothing oh my god when people bring like a kid to a movie that's well don't bring a baby to a movie theater in fact if you have a baby be very cautious about where you're bringing it.

Don't bring it to a fucking movie theater, first of all. I think that's the number one place to not bring a child. Don't bring a little infant to a movie theater because, you know. First of all, the kid's not going to enjoy it. Unless it's a kid's movie. Then bring your kid to a movie theater. Go have fun. Go buck wild.

Or even, I don't know. Never mind. I guess with kids movies sometimes they because in uh South Carolina at the Columbiana Grand they would have these showings of like early in the daytime yeah for kids yeah for kids so it's like people expected a loud theater yeah we should we should write a book on like parenting just on like parenting advice yeah like from two people who were in their early 20s who've never had kids, two dudes just be like, all right, this is how to raise your kids and what to do and what not to do.

Like Bill Cosby, he wrote Fatherhood. He did a lot of other things too, but we could write a book kind of like how Bill Cosby wrote a book on fatherhood, on how to be a good father. Okay. I'm down. We should genuinely try to write a book on parenting. See how that goes. I mean, see, like have someone have a kid and then raise it from start to finish using our book.

And then they can write the first review on Amazon 20 years later. Funny comment where it goes, baby stuck in toaster, how I fix. I'll actually go to page 326. Nice. I'm going to test that issue exactly. Fucking nice. Holy shit. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What? Damn. What are you looking at? I don't know. There's this segue here, but it has a pretty expensive price tag. I don't see a salesman out here. But I got this big wad of cash I could just put on the ground if there's no salesman out here Ryan we can just steal it

okay let's take risks life's all about taking risks I'm just gonna rip off the tag let's hop on get on my shoulders go go go um did you know

Ryan when I was in 8th grade I decided I was going to make some Facebook pages. And I just remembered this this week. I actually found them and I closed them. Did you find them? I found them and I closed them. So when I asked you if you closed them or not, you were like, hmm, did I? I went back and I closed them. I wish I could go see them.

I wish i actually went and checked i i rediscovered these facebook pages i made so uh i thought i'd let you know what they are i made a facebook page called uh join if you never plan on doing pot which uh i joined um and i tried to get some of my friends to join um then i also made a facebook called Justin Bieber is totally gay for Usher. That was a good one. Justin Bieber is totally gay for Usher. Remember back then when like people made like Facebook isn't really like that anymore. But people would make pages that would just be like little joke titles and shit and people would like it.

Okay. And then like that like way back in the day of Facebook in the early days of Facebook. So I made join if you never plan on doing pot and never was in all caps. Join if in the early days of Facebook. So I made Join If You Never Plan On Doing Pot, and never was in all caps. Join If You Never Plan On Doing Pot. Yeah. And then I also made Justin Bieber's Totally Gay For Usher. How good did you feel about yourself when you were young and you were like, I started this group?

You know what? I'm a really good person. I started this group.'m never gonna smoke pot i think most people that age have that like uh like i'm never gonna drink i'm never gonna smoke pot guys kids are super egotistical i don't think that's egotistical i think that's just they you know they want to feel morally sound so they like no i would say like like there's a stage in childhood development where you're super egotistical because yeah i yeah like you can think of others and be sad about others but there's there's a time when you're a child when you're all you're thinking about is like

kind of like me me me me you haven't you haven't really learned yet the balance of like uh you haven't had a you haven't had all these life experiences and all these lessons and all these shitty hard times usually um that put things in uh give you like a perspective check yeah like life is all about shipping chipping away at your being and of your childhood innocence until you become a nice chiseled man yeah with uh that needs to be put on medication um i remember when i was a kid uh i really wanted like an eight pack oh sorry no diss to people on medication i've been on medication i'm on medication and i and i'm thinking about going on medication again medication's great if you're depressed you should go on medication if you were something okay we got that out of the way. Continue.

I remember when I was a kid, I really wanted an 8-pack, like abs. 8-pack, oh, yeah. I wanted an 8-pack of beers. Do your pecs count as some of the pack? Unfortunately not. What? I mean, they should. Well, no, it's different muscles.

But it's like a, it's. Yeah, they're like the same kind of like shape. Like if you have abs that go all the way up to your pecs, then it's yeah like i i get they're like the same kind of like shape like if you have if you have abs they go all the way up to your pecs then it's like could you imagine if you instead of growing like getting multiple abs you could just get multiple pecs so you'd have like it looked like a dog stomach just a bunch of nipples dude and the pecs get smaller and smaller on the way down am i the only one that gets like slightly bothered by like dogs that have huge hanging nipples like eight massive nipples just like hanging and wobbling down just kind of flapping around like Brian's dog yeah Brian's dog has a big

ass titties dude he's got these big nips that are just like sticking out and flopping around Coco's fucking nipples dude like Brian get your dog a couple of bras put like three or four bras on that thing oh man Coco's so cute she is a very cute dog

she's a pit bull she's adorable why don't they make bras for dogs like like dogs i'm sure they do look up dog dog i'm gonna look up dog bras hey those are both like things guys call each other dog and bra that puts a whole new meaning to review bra where he reviews bras ha ha imagine. Imagine, imagine review bra, reviewing bras, like trying it, like he's shirtless and he's trying on bras and like lingerie.

Now this one seems a bit, I don't like the clasp on this one. Seems a little too tight. It is a bit tight. Hmm. But overall, it holds the breasts very nicely. Yes.

Oh. I love him. He just hit 500,000 subscribers. What's his real name? John. His name is John. Seriously. And if this somehow gets back to him, I would love for him to come on our podcast.

He's always welcome as a guest. I just want to talk to him. He seems so down to earth and cool. So Reviewbrah, if you want to come on our podcast, the seat is open. We got an extra space on the couch for you. We do. Do it over Skype. We'll fly out here and hang out with us. It is a bit toasty in here right now. It is hot. That AC did not

work. We turned on the AC before we came in this room to record and it just... Was it even blowing? Did you check to see if it was blowing? No. Well, it was. I heard it. I heard it when I walked in. And then it, uh, it's just... I think we need to inform Brent or something because we were having troubles with the AC yesterday. It's just, it's just a toasty son of a bitch in here.

It's like, it's like sitting in a microwave oven. Hold on. I didn't look up dog bras. Oh, okay. Stuff to look up dog bra. Dog bra. Dog bra. We might be sitting on a million dollar idea here.

Okay. Okay. Here we go. Uh, yeah, it's just, it's pictures. Dogs don't look bad wearing bras okay i'm being honest really can i see yeah like i want to see dog bras or the tiny little bras that only cover up like see like that doesn't look awful on a dog no like it looks like it kind of fits like uh see this is a dog wearing underwear and sunglasses. That's funny.

Speaking of dogs, can I have a Ryan advice hour? As in you give Ryan advice and he asks for it. I give Ryan advice or the audience gives Ryan advice? The audience, not you. Yeah, I don't have any advice to give. Go ahead. It's about Lego. So I wanted to know because he's been whining a lot, and usually I'm like, shh, Lego, stop.

But I read that giving them even negative attention is bad, and that you should ignore them at all costs when they're whining. Oh, because then they learn that they'll get attention if they do that. Yeah, so is that true? Should I actually start ignoring him, even though he'll start to whine a little louder? Do you think eventually that'll help? How do I get Lego to stop being a bitch sometimes, or should i just live with it because he's a dog also um i'm he he barks at dogs a lot when i take him out and it makes it frustrating to take him out a lot of the times and i've tried a positive reinforcement treat training and all that jazz but he seems to get you see the food doesn't overpower the stimuli of the other dog with anybody

who would like to help to make walking experience with experiences with Lego that much better for me and when I have to go out of town for Matt and Tucker if you could help out just dog behavioral stuff I've looked up a bunch of stuff but I'm interested to see what has worked for you guys I'm sure some of you

work at in some as beside I'm interested to see what has worked for you guys. I'm sure some of you work beside vets or have vets as friends. I'm sure some of you are dog trainers. Yeah, some of you are dog trainers. If you could help out, because Lego, let me put it this way. He's not like your typical dog. I know a lot of owners say that, but he's super anxious. He is very energetic, and it's hard to calm him down, I guess. Anything to help out with that description of Lego?

He's just a very difficult dog to calm down and to get to just do what you need to do. I was going to say maybe he just needs more exercise to get that out, but you can't take him to a dog park or anything because he goes crazy. And he barks. What if

you should get him some side side blinders like horses. Like one of those horse side blinder things. But if anyone has any tips, tricks, treats. Treats, yeah. Maybe some treats. That would be most I would really appreciate that. Ryan would love it. He would love that advice.

So lay it on him. Lay it on him like get a little butter knife. Get that advice. Spread it on the knife like some butter and just spread it on Ryan like toast. You know? That's what he needs. What he needs, baby. And I mean, I have the same issue a little bit with Banana because he'll just start meowing randomly. Like he wants something, even though he has food.

He has water. His litter box has fresh litter. And he'll just meow like he wants food. And it's like, please stop, Banana. You're being really loud. And he just keeps doing it. cats are a different animal so i i ignore him most of the time and when i ignore him he does stop yeah after like a minute he'll stop if i i have noticed if i if i say shut up he'll keep doing it i'm just wondering if i shush lego even though he's like oh i should stop like he stops right then he got your attention yeah i uh i'll be in my room and i'll

just hear it's really funny just like hearing the silence of just like because he's a little bitch it's like just just go without being with me for five seconds dude you should make like a scarecrow of yourself like a like a big life-size dummy of yourself and like don't shower for a week and rub it all over yourself so that's your scent and then just go put a chair and the little room he's in and then it's like take a picture of my face smiling and like cut it out see if it works print it out and tape it to the head of the scarecrow yeah that's genius like you never have to see him again just leave him just leave him in his room perfect and just put uh you just sitting in a chair just like oh and you can get a tape recorder and record yourself being like hi lego hello lego lego stop that aha good boy good boy who's a good boy you're a good boy lego

and then just have that on loop on it on like a cassette tape coming out so he'll always be happy or i could get one of those little cameras, put it in his little room and I can check on him when I'm working. And every now and then I'd be like, Hey Lego. And then he'll be like, what monitor? He'll go.

I think that would make him more anxious. That would drive him crazy. Cause he's like, where is he? Yeah. What about a, how about we contact Rick Moranis, get him to shrink down Lego.

And then you can have just a tiny little Lego you can carry around. Honey. I accidentally shrunk our Lego. Yeah. You can shrink Lego to the size of a Lego. Look at that. How's that? You can make him a little Lego house and put it in. Nice.

Honey, I Shrunk Ourselves is better than Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. Just saying. I forgot about that one. I don't remember anything about Honey, I Shrunk Ourselves. You don't? You don't remember the giant cockroach scene? Wait. Oh.

Where they fight off a giant cockroach scene wait oh where they fight off a giant cockroach that's that's i barely remember it but i don't want to i don't want to see that that's like my nightmare how about when they hop in a hot wheels car and drive on the track i remember that that shit i was like whoa i remember you know what scene i loved in honey i shrunk the kids when they i never saw honey i shrunk the kids i only we only owned honey i we shrunk ourselves it's the one where they're all under the microscope going oh honey honey i shrunk the kids they find like one of those oatmeal cream pies and it's huge and they like scoop some of the cream out and they eat it is there a snake in that movie i don't remember they ride on an ant though okay they get on the

back of an ant and ride it remember um because uh is it disney, is it Disney? Has, like, some ride and there's, like, a snake and other shit in it. Isn't, wait, who's the, I'm trying to remember who the host of that ride is. It's not the Willy Wonka guy, is it? Oh, and Disney World? That's not

Gene Wilder. Oh, I went on this. It's like a 4D, uh, it's a 4D film. Yeah, but, like, who's the host? Who's the guy that is, like, hang? It's Rick Moranis, I think. Is it really? I think it's Rick Moranis. I'm going to look it up. It's from the movie.

Speaking of Disney... Shh. I'm looking it up, Matt. Okay. I'm sorry. Fucking... Is it Rick Moranis? Disney ride host.

Honey, I shrunk... The kids, yeah. The kids. The audience. Honey, I shrunk the audience, yeah. Is it Rick Moranis or Rick Moranis? Am I just more inclined to say Rick Moranis because it sounds like anus? I don't know.

Rick Moranis? Honey, I shrunk the audience. The spin, blah, blah, blah. It's hosted by Bill O'Reilly. It's closed now. That's too bad. I mean, I would assume so because it's an old movie, but. I'm trying to see

cast and crew yeah Rick Moranis there we go look at that Rick Moranis I don't know why I thought Gene Wilder would be on that ride seems Wonka-esque imagine just Bill O'Reilly hosting it has nobody successfully made

an amazing Willy Wonka ride like a chocolate river ride type thing? That sounds amazing. Does Disney own Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? No. No, but still. You'd think that would be awesome. Yeah.

They should make a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory theme park. A Charlie and the Chocolate Factory themed putt-putt course. Yeah. Like real chocolate rivers. And you hire real Oompa-loompas. Want to talk about the Disney controversy? On how there's a lot of people defending Disney. Are there really?

Yeah. Come on. Let's talk about it. They're a business. So what happened? Well, L.A. Times, well, Disney has been caught doing some interesting kind of political things like just with funding and just kind of – Funding political campaigns and shit. Some would –

Some 1% shit. Some would say they're kind of strong-arming Anaheim for money that could be used for better things, I guess. Yeah. Um, blah, blah, blah.

Basically Disney is just being a corporation. Corporation is doing what corporations do, which is shitty things. Yeah. And LA times called them out. And then Disney was like, ha ha, you're uninvited to our uh review like so

early screenings of movies now was it was it investigative journalism and they like discovered they like uncovered all this shit disney was doing and like reported on it yeah it was it was like a it was like a piece yeah it was like this whole piece about disney and anaheim and disney's like you can't come to any of our things anymore and get early access and review shit so everyone was like that's that's barring journalists because they did a piece on something bad you were doing and that's not cool. Or maybe some people might not even call it bad, but just something they were doing that most people would probably have a negative reaction to. Well, it also it sets a really bad precedent when you start like doing when journalism and like journalists start getting shut out of things because they expose something or because they, you know, write. They do their job as investigative journalists. Yeah, that sets a really scary precedent because it's like, oh, Disney didn't got away with it.

yeah that sets a really scary precedent because it's like oh disney didn't got away with it uh so another corporation could be like okay this this uh journalist and these this journalism agency uh uncovered something we were doing uh let's use our power as a corporation to really um stick it to them yeah it's like that that is that's bad well it only speech it only gained attention like as much attention as it did i think because disney uh responded to the original article and was like this is a hit piece and then every then a lot of people were like what what are they talking what's disney talking about yeah it's like oh okay disney so basically uh but everything's fine now but before that i was root i was like yes because. Because a bunch of film critic associations or like film criticism associations, blah, blah, blah. Like award associations?

Yeah. They were like, hey, you're not going to receive anything unless you play nice. Which I could also see as, I don't know. It's just a weird area. But I was rooting because I don't know, just a weird area. But I was I was rooting because I don't like the Disney Corporation. No, like if you follow their history, they're just I mean, most corporations are shitty. But Disney in particular is super fucking shitty. Even back in the heyday of like legitimate Walt Disney Day.

Yeah. Like these a bunch of like movie associations were like, all right, Disney, if you're gonna if you're gonna like blacklist journalists like that for reporting on you, then all your movies are disqualified from these, like, end-of-the-year movie award ceremonies until you publicly, uh, revoke what you did to the LA Times. And they did. And apologize. And Disney did. So. So, that's good for them. How does it feel to be strong-armed, Disney?

Ha ha! LA Times beat the shit out of Mickey Mouse, dude. So that's good for them. How does it feel to be strong-armed, Disney? Ha ha! LA Times beat the shit out of Mickey Mouse, dude. It's just nice to see that a corporation won't fully get away with sweeping shit under the rug all the time. Of course people will end up forgetting about this, and this was just a story that people paid attention to for a week. But it's important that this happens every now and then because then we'll just get numb to big businesses and corporations acting shitty. And then it's just – it sucks from there because then they can abuse their power in ways. It's kind of a – I guess – The slippery slope, whatever.

Yeah, totally. The big political argument that everyone hates. I think that it's, like, especially right now, it's more important than ever to, like, protect free journalism and, like, help support, you know, free journalism and shit. So do whatever you can, guys. Like good sources. Yeah, good sources. So if there's a source of journalism that you think does a good job maybe maybe support him maybe donate to him because because that's the wars yeah support the like we need to support alex jones guys we need to be buying his male

supplements which ryan and i have some of his male vitality uh solution we do and we might we might do a video where we try it for like a week i'm a little scared because that shit's not i don't want to turn into alex jones i don't want it to be like some botched scientific experiment like in some horror movie where like this guy drinks this like potion and turns into this monster we're gonna turn we're gonna turn into alex jones drink his male vitality shit by drinking chemical x i wonder if we gave that stuff to a frog if it would turn a gay what if what if his what if his male vitality stuff actually turns frogs gay? My male vitality's turning the friggin' frogs gay.

Me too. Takes his cock out. Brings an intern. Hello, I'm Alex Jones' cock. Help me. I haven't had sex in weeks. He keeps feeding me chili. Stipping me in chili every day.

What do you think his cock looks like? Do you think it's like super big? It's like me in chili every day What do you think his cock looks like? Do you think it's like super big? It's like a muscular I just Whenever I This won't even look like a cock But when you said that I just pictured

Like a styrofoam bowl of baked beans That's Bush's baked beans Yeah That's Like That's probably the general feeling one would get that's Bush's baked beans yeah just a that's like that's that's probably the general feeling one would get

from looking at Alex Jones' cock just like the general feeling people get when they look at your penis is the way Kronk's voice sounds yes what about like remember those commercials for Bush's baked beans

where it was like the golden retriever he's like I'll never give you the recipe it was like a sweet old white man wanting the recipe and it was never like malicious it was just like how about that recipe he's like not today buddy like give you the recipe. It was like a sweet old white man wanting the recipe. And it was never like malicious.

It was just like, how about that recipe? He's like, not today, buddy. Like the golden retriever would say that. Yeah, he's like, sorry. Like that was like such a nicer, more southern version of like cereal mascots chasing kids for cereal, you know? That's like the only adult like product or like not adult product. adult like product uh or like not adult product the only product that's not aimed at kids that has like a mascot that's protecting a secret formula or like trying to keep it from uh an antagonist flakes yeah i'm not not cereals though not like cereals like this is the like the only

other food can you think of another food that that has like jolly green giant their mascot it's not trying to he's stealing my green beans! Give me those green beans, kids! I'm talking about like a mascot that's... Could you imagine if they had that same thing for like the Jolly Green Giant? Like kids trying to steal his green beans? Yeah. And every commercial was like this animated like chase where kids are chasing the Jolly Green Giant. He's like, fuck!

Get away! Get the fuck away from my green beans, you fucking assholes! They're throwing rocks at him. Stop! He's like this... There's rocks in my green beans, you fucking assholes! They're throwing rocks at him. Stop! There's rocks in my green beans now! He's like, pick them out. He's like, stop it! Stop!

What would be another weird product where the mascot's on a chase from kids or someone else trying to steal the recipe? Like adult diapers? I know that one, but one that would be like really just eerie. Think of a fast food like McDonald's. If McDonald's mascot was a cow and the kids were chasing the cow to get those delicious burgers.

And the kids have like knives and pitchforks and shit. Yeah. Or like, no, I think the worst i think the ending one is just the dead cow be like with it like them slitting the cow's throat draining the blood out of it and like they're all smiling imagine that but for like dairy yeah and like they're chasing it for the milk and like trying to reach it at its udders and he's like don't touch me don't touch me my udders imagine that like a chicken and eggs. They're chafed red. Chafed udders. Have you ever milked a cow?

I did that fake cow milking. I hate it. I hate the way it feels. It feels like a little bag of sand. Yeah, like crackles. I don't like it. You'd think it would be like just a smooth tug, like you're jerking a little. It would be like a little dangling penis.

Yeah. Let me stroke this dick. Exactly. But it feels like there's glass inside, and it's not... Glass? It feels like... I thought more like sand, like grains. Like you're cracking glass. Oh.

I milked a real cow, and I feel like there was glass inside, and you're cracking it. What is that stuff that is in there? Is it... I think it's just like the glands or something, and they're full of milk, and you're, I don't know. Now, is it that you gotta start from the base and kind of squeeze it out like toothpaste, or how do you milk a cow? I don't know.

It's just kind of, I don't know, guys. I'm sure there's many cow milkers in the comments. How do you milk a cow? And can you milk a pig? Why don't people, because here's the thing, you know, there's like,

people drink cow milk of course people also drink they drink goat's milk little pigs milk their milk other pigs right but why do we not mainstream drink other animals milk why why are cows because cows produce a large quantity of milk do do other animals it's maybe it's not as nutritious doesn't taste as good too like because there's those. Why don't... We do goat milk. Yeah, goat milk. So why is it cows and goats?

Almond milk. You milk an almond? Why is there not even a small market for pig's milk? Or, say, bull's milk? Probably because it would be a waste of livestock because that milk would go towards feeding the other pigs. When in terms of these mother cows, like a calf, like one calf produces so much over its lifespan. Like in, well, except, you know, if it's for meat, then not.

But a lot of people kill baby cows. What type of meat is that called? That's like, oh, you mean when they like, they don't let the cow walk so its muscles are really tender yeah that's so sad uh but that's what they do for like kobe beef i think i think that they like fatten up the cow kobe beef it's like one of the nicest beefs in the world from japan it's like super expensive i i do want to try kobe beef just because it's one of those things that's like this is a world-renowned delicacy um but it does make me sad when I think about it. But, like, you know what also makes me sad?

It's because it's putting the animal through extra stress. Like we do with a bunch of other animals. You know what? Fuck it. I eat animals. You know, I'm not going to be a little high and mighty bitch about it. You know, if I want to change the way I eat, I'll do it. But right now, I'm a fan of beef and any kind of beef well here's the thing

it's like I think Kobe beef I think the cows are actually pampered like because it's such delicate like expensive beef that they pamper these little baby cows and like very good conditions I think the shittier ones where they treat them shittier is like the regular cheap shit you buy at the store like the regular

public yeah like the slaughterhouse cows they like grow up in the worst conditions and then they're just slaughtered yeah they just take a little uh they take a little no country for old men gun and go the little like in uh in it in the beginning of it when they shoot this i hated that part i was like why'd they have to show the sheep i hate when they like show unnecessary animal like violence in movies i'm like oh they could have shown it from behind they'll have to show it straight on just like

it was necessary because it showed that he didn't have the gumption to do what he needed to do but by the end of it he was killing them

left and right baby he just needed his imagination to kill those animals cause the thing wasn't well actually that wasn't even his arc that was

wasn't Mike the one that or what was the Ben was Ben the big brother henry who was the big brother what was his name i don't remember anymore sorry finn not it wasn't finn's character that's richie sorry i don't remember some things about your movie also sorry wyatt but you know the thing about like beef is i'm not a vegetarian because to face you like me I like eating meat.

And you don't have a problem with... You don't have as big... The problem you have with the treatment of animals, I guess, doesn't go above... It doesn't go, I guess... It doesn't outweigh my love for meat. But you know what the thing is? Tucker's does. I think that that is based, honestly, in ignorance for me because i have not seen what goes on in slaughterhouses fully i feel

like if i watched like one of those movies that exposes like what happens in slaughterhouses i might consider being a vegetarian because it would upset me so much that's happened to my aunt she went to a slaughterhouse on a trip and then she hasn't eaten meat since and that was when she was like a teenager yeah and same with her daughter. I can defend both sides, honestly, when it comes to just eating meat. I can understand those who choose not to, and I can understand those who do. I just wish they treated the animal. I wish that slaughterhouses had better regulations for how they treat and kill animals. For the amount of people that are eating the food and how the mass quantities they're having to just put this shit out there i'd i'm not trying to defend them but part of me feels like it would be hard to give

each cow a private room and really nice treatment because i'm not saying a private room i just wish that like there's some like have you seen those like videos that have snuck out of slaughterhouses where the guys are like kicking the animals i mean yeah it's fucked up the same shit happens with people and their pets they're always going to be shitty people in any kind of uh job or medium and um but i guess what you're talking about is the overall treatment of the animals like like in slaughterhouses and with pigs in general like they'll shit and die in like all in this big group of people it's it's, it's, um,

you gotta, you gotta also think these things have personalities, like animals have personalities and feelings. They're like intricate. Like we were talking about the human body earlier. Like they're, they're, they're clearly like objectified, not in the sense of objectifying women.

Like they're turned into objects, like the way, like the meat, the people that work there and the meat industry sees, it's like, they don't have feelings. I don't know, but they're animals and they do have feelings and personalities. How many people in Asia are like the meat the people that work there and the meat industry sees it's like they don't have feelings they don't have but they're animals and they do have feelings and personalities how

many people in asia are like the cows are mistreated i this chicken was mistreated because i feel like in in like those countries the the food is treated a bit better like it's like we're using all of this fucking uh animal and it's more prepared like it seems more fresh i feel like at least in china uh the protests against like animal rights i think they're at least more hushed because it's it's harder to protest against corporations in the government in china and also in china they got they got much bigger i think they're more focused on the human rights violations of people working in factories instead of animals japan japan i don't know honestly i honestly. I wonder what the animal rights movement is like in Japan.

Well, they definitely don't. Is it just me? Because whenever I think of animals being treated better, I feel like the United States is probably one of the shittier contenders when it comes to commercial treatment of animals.

I feel like Europe might be pretty good with animals. I don't know, whenever I think of some European guy in a farm, I always picture this guy that's like, that's probably just some pipe dream though. It's got like a beard. Across the world, how many people are

quote unquote mistreating animals for food? Too many. It's just like, you know mistreating animals for food too many it's just like you know what would be amazing if they figured out how to like take animal cells and grow like beef without having like they could grow it the exact same in a lab

without actually like having the animal like they could just grow the cells of the meat and like produce perfect 100% regular quality meat without ever needing to you know kill the animals yeah even produce more animals they can just grow the meat in these like meat farms and that sounds like that sounds gross by itself it's like growing meat in a meat farm but like if they could scientifically do it and it's the same that would be awesome and i've heard

that they're actually able to like they've started learning how to grow meat. Okay, so with the treatment of animals, is the reason why it's so bad because humans are so intelligent and past most of – well, past all of other life on the planet in terms of society and everything like that? Because if we were hunter gatherers we could be eating a pig alive and the pig would be crying or well no then we'd need the food that's a difference now there's an overabundance i'm trying to i'm trying to really pinpoint my emotions on this because i don't really think about it often i just i don't either i just eat food maybe that's the problem maybe not enough people think about it because it's just gotten to the point where instead of because we used to do this on a small scale and now it's just gotten to the point where instead of, because we used to do this on a small scale,

and now it's just because of big business. Yeah, I think so. Like the food industry is like, of course it's all about money. And I think that. Quality goes down with quantity. So when the quantity went up of like the amount of stuff, the amount of meat and food that needed to be provided for the people that wanted it, supply and demand.

Well, you know. The quality, the treatment of animals probably went that needed to be provided for the people that wanted it, supply and demand. Well, you know, just like- The quality, the quality, the treatment of animals probably went down. Yeah, because- You can't have like amazing treatment of animals in the industry that we have today, probably. Well, the thing is like these corporations are making, you know, for them it's like we want the fastest product that is the most consumable. That's why they give cows and shit all these hormones. So they grow faster.

They grow like too fast for their bodies and shit. They treat them terribly because it's a quick kill. And they want to produce more animals as fast as they can to get them. They want to give them the hormones to get them exactly how, like the most prime for selling, essentially. There's also the environmental effects on just having so many fucking cows. Yeah, absolutely. That's why Tucker doesn't eat beef because he says that the environmental effects of the food industry with the cows is really bad for the environment. And I haven't looked into it more.

I'd like for him to explain it in more detail to me. Because Tucker's very uh he's a big environmentalist and um and i feel like living with him is definitely gonna start changing the way i do some things just because i feel more conscious i guess i'm around tucker of what i'm throwing away and like i guess because you're afraid to be your own person yes i'm i'm i i don't know i'm just like him being around just makes more conscious of like throwing like i guess waste it's like oh shit you know because like it's because you know people affect your environment and having someone around it

are you saying you're gonna become a vegetarian or like you're gonna stop eating cow because tucker no no no i'm talking about like throwing shit away and recycling and shit. Oh, yeah Well, we already have too much plastic in our house. We have like utensils and shit just like I Don't know what it is about the water Matt, that's not the real Ryan! What the fuck? Who the fuck is it? Matt, I know, let me You just shot my f-

Why are there two Ryans? I overslept and then Tucker said you went to you went with me to go record the podcast or something? We drove here together. Why are there two Ryans? That wasn't the right Ryan. What are you talking about? I'm talking...

Okay, answer me this. Did you drink tea before going to bed last night? Yes, I did. Fuck, we need to go now. What? What? Because you drank that tea, a series of events is... Ryan, that's not the real Matt!

What the fuck? No, no, I'm the real Matt. What the... Don't listen to him f-?! Don't listen to him! What?! Don't listen to him! That's the Matt that drank the tea, though! Get the fuck outta here!