Table Manners with Jessie and Lennie Ware - S9 Ep 1: Aisling Bea
Episode Date: February 5, 2020We are back for Series 9 and with a lot of good craic! We’ve been trying to nail down this week's guest ever since we became friends on a Love Island WhatsApp group. I have laughed and swooned at he...r wit and grace from afar for a while now so it was my total pleasure to offer a hoodie and a green tea to Irish actress, writer, and all round hilarious human, Aisling Bea. And thank God she came, if only to explain the meaning of 'dogging' to mum. We chat Irish whisky, plane food, Love Island (of course) sustainability and nibbling on toasted pecans.Aisling is the sharpest cheddar on the board and god we love her!!! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
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Hello and welcome to Table Manners Series 9. This is the start of something beautiful.
And in my hand I have our cookbook. It's actually hot off the press. We've got the first two
copies ever, Mum.
Yep.
What do you think?
I think it looks gorgeous.
I know, me too.
I'm surprised how beautiful it looks.
I'm really proud of us.
Me too. It's surprised how beautiful it looks. I'm really proud of us. Me too.
It's actually a gorgeous book. It's a gorgeous
book. It reads really well.
You do write beautifully, darling.
Thank you. I've tried. You did try.
Yeah. It's just, yeah, I
kind of can't really believe that
we did that last year.
Started it with a baby in my tummy.
I can't believe we did that and we still love each other.
Debatable.
But I just think maybe it's time for me to move out
and my work on my house isn't going to be done
until the end of March.
Jessica, that's so rude.
Gratitude would be a much more appropriate feeling.
Okay.
What are you grateful for today, Mum?
If we're going to go cafe, gratitude.
I'm grateful that you cook because I don't feel well
Thank you
And I'm grateful to have a roof over my head
Good
Even if it is with a scary mother
That is so unfair
Stop bossing me
As your daughter keeps saying, stop bossing
Yeah, every time Mum and I speak to each other now
She says stop bossing because we speak loudly to each other
Anyway mum and I speak to each other now she says stop bossing because we speak loudly to each other anyway so today we have Aisling B on the podcast so excited this is a huge booking for us I wouldn't
even call it a booking this is an honor we've wanted her for ages and we haven't been able to
do it because she's internationally the busiest woman in the world. The funniest woman in the world.
Is everywhere.
And she's managed to come over.
And fit us in.
And fit us in tonight.
Now, we've been texting each other.
We know each other through this Love Island WhatsApp group.
So, oh mum, stop it.
Can't beat us.
Join us.
No way.
Anyway. We haven't actually met before but i've kind of
watched her in action on the whatsapp group and she's hysterical and also seen this way up which
was so brilliant her her own tv show that she wrote and starred in last year and with sharon
who's also wonderful and she's just been in a netflix show with paul rudd called living with yourself
she was in the fall i know she was the crazy nurse not the crazy nurse the religious the
religious nurse so she's kind of prolific and doing everything and we have managed to grab her
and it's you know it's january you will be hearing this in febru but this is January and I've been texting her and I
said, you know, what do you eat? What don't you eat? She's a pescatarian. So I, and she says,
I'm trying to be kind of good to myself. So I took that as quite a light meal. Um, and she says,
she's not a pudding person. So what we've done is, um, we're doing a salmon salmon fillets you can just do a big bit of salmon with panko breadcrumbs
and chili and ginger and spring onions and coriander a little bit of olive oil stick it
all on you put the ginger on first and then the spring onions to kind of stick the breadcrumb
mix with the chili and the coriander stick it on the top of the salmon bung it in the oven for 12 minutes and serving it with
something actually I've just made up today which I think is going to be really nice you know
sweden carrots is a great mix that you have as a side in a roast I've just added some sweet roasted
sweet potato with that and some grated ginger to that and some orange zest just to kind of pep it up and it's
also kind of a light little mash and then with some pak choy and soy and garlic so it's all quite
light and really quick to make so we're doing that and then we've got a cheese board for afters
it must be quick darling because you were having a facial up until six o'clock. Yes, I have had a facial today and my skin is feeling rather red and tight.
Yeah. How would you describe the colour of your skin?
It's puce.
Yeah.
It's puce at the moment. I have a music video at the weekend because I have new music coming out
and I'm shooting my music video in Serbia and I wanted to have a...
Clearly got a new look, darling.
A facial, a strong facial where I'd have a little non-surgical, non-invasive little lift.
Looks pretty invasive to me, mate.
It's a little red at the moment, but thank you, Shane Cooper.
It's going to go down.
And yeah, I look quite terrifying, I would say.
But I'm telling you, I'm going to look so hot in that video.
So anyway, we have Aisling Bea and I hope she doesn't mind my red, red face.
Coming up on Table Manners.
Ashling B you've arrived
on a Thursday night
classic me
you've asked for a hoodie
to be a bit more comfy
I just needed to chill out
you're drinking
you're drinking
yeah I'll get your PJs on too
almost would
I can run you a bath
oh
can we do it from the back
imagine you guys serving me salmon in the bath.
Salmon in the bath.
Salmon in the bath.
It would be very like circle of life, wouldn't it?
You're like, there you go, little salmon,
back to where you began.
But yeah, you're drinking your green tea.
It's January and we're all trying to be good to ourselves.
Yes.
So when I was texting you,
now I've got your number through this Love Island WhatsApp group. God, for a second I thought you meant, was texting you now i've got your number through this
love island whatsapp for a second i thought you meant you were like i've got your number mate i
know where you're up to and i was like all right jesse bit of an aggressive oh but no you literally
you do i actually do have your number what is it then go on tell everybody but i am i i um kind of
did the thing of like can't wait to meet you because i actually feel like you're the nearest
i've got to a tinder date because i know what you mean because we've never met each other yeah
I feel like I know you so well yeah I've seen your humor I've heard your voice and voice notes
I've danced uh and wiggled my arse many times to your voice oh thank you so much we have and then
we met each other on our love island whatsapp group I know and we're both active on it and I
think neither you nor I correct me if I'm wrong,
ever realised how many people
are actually on the
Love Island WhatsApp group.
Yeah, it's quite a lot, isn't it?
I thought there were
about 12 people on it.
Probably 70.
Oh, like it's now up to 92.
And there are a lot of people
who are watching quietly
on our Love Island group.
We are.
And I didn't know.
I think maybe change a group.
Oh, it's very...
Oh, it's too late now it's kind
of like there is an exclusive group that I'm not in Jessie ask no you can't be like hey guys can
we set this one off it's like it's like love asking to be respected or told that you're cool
once you have to ask for it you're sort of not cool and I've never brought you up to not be in
the exclusive group mum oh my god I feel like it's pretty exclusive oh my god what if we're like
what if there's another like offspring when we're not in oh no i i wonder yeah but no i feel um i
thank every moment that i'm still allowed to be in it and isn't it funny that like with this job
of ours and we work in the business we call show,
that no matter what you do,
there's always some other room you think there might be.
No matter what level you get to,
you always think,
oh, is there another room that I'm not allowed in?
You're chasing some kind of like being accepted.
And only this year am I finally like,
ah, grand, I'll stick with hanging around
with like good crack people. I mean,, grand. I'll stick with hanging around with like good crack people.
I mean, when you say I'll stick with what?
Sharon Hook.
Like you're doing all right.
Everyone always.
Paul Rudd.
I had an interview.
Paul Rudd.
I've always loved him.
Yeah.
From Clueless.
And because he's not in any form of social media.
Once I, once it kind of came out that I was doing Living With Yourself, the show I was in with him.
I became like.
Netflix series
that's up for a
it was up
it was up for Golden Globe
for actor Paul
didn't get it unfortunately
still was up for it
yeah was still up for it
yeah
hey that's another thing
I remember once
I was nominated
for a comedy award
and the whole week
everyone was like
congratulations
and then as soon as you
lose it
people are like
oh I'm so sorry
so it takes away
the thing that was a
congratulations but suddenly you don't lose and it's always a chasing another yeah but I still
got nominated it was still the thing and that's what I mean about constantly you have to at some
point go ah maybe I won't bother looking for that carrot on the stick anymore but I get all of Paul's
like um hey is there any way um Paul could uh just try on my t-shirt or is there any way Paul could just try on my T-shirt? Or is there any way Paul wants some free biscuits?
Or could you tell Paul Rudd that he's on the list of people I'd allow my wife to have an affair with?
Like I have to pass on all these messages.
Do you pass them on?
Yeah, yeah, mainly.
Can you ask Paul Rudd to be on a table manners podcast?
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
It happens with Paul, Phoebe and Sharon Horgan.
He's kept surprisingly gorgeous.
Yeah, so he lives in a little fridge
and they refrigerate
and then they take him out for kind of meetings
and stuff like that.
He's very well preserved.
The problem is acting with him
is a very cold experience
because to touch his face
has that sort of waxy pallor.
I love this is her on dry January.
Do you know what I mean?
Like, I just wonder.
Or like dry wet January, ladies.
Am I right? No, dry January, it's been more of on dry January. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, I just wonder. Or like dry wet January, ladies. Am I right?
No, I'm dry January.
It's been more of a damp January.
Like every five days I reward myself for doing so well by getting absolutely twazzled.
Were you twazzled last night?
I didn't get twazzled.
I think I was more, there was free cocktails at this.
Where were you?
I was at an event, like a Vanity Fair party before the BAFTAs.
Oh, darling.
Rising stars. Darling. Night. Who were you wearing? an event like a vanity fair party before the BAFTAs oh darling rising stars darling um uh
night who are you wearing who was I wearing every boy's eyes and the whole venue Ben what a
confident woman um I was there with loads of friends it was actually great crack and that's
where I'm not someone who let go yeah I'm not someone who drinks when I feel insecure
I'm actually like I get carried away by fun I hate being left out of a potential anecdote
I tend to stay three hours longer than one shot you know there's that thing of like
leave when the party's going well I leave like at the end when someone's like sorry we just have
homes to go to you know that
there's higher it's just it's over it's oh there's not nothing's gonna happen I'm like but what if
what if in the last dregs of the night there's a potential laugh and I could get involved in the
anecdote of it um so that's what I might say there were a lot of friends there and I found it very
hard to leave and there was so much sugar in the free cocktails. Oh God, you feel like shit. Which is your favourite cocktail?
I love an Eastern Standard or a Gimlet with a vodka.
So like things that are like elderflowery, minty, cucumber.
I've got a little elderflower that you could put in that if you want.
It's fizzy water.
I didn't even ask if you like fizzy water.
Do you know what?
I'm so humble.
I don't like fizzy water or champagne.
That's how humble I am.
Don't you?
I'm a real salt of the earth type of person.
I like still water.
But you have good water in Ireland.
We do actually.
A lot of it.
In some places.
Well, though there is a lot of controversy about water pipes at the moment and people
being taxed for water.
Shall I take that then?
Do you actually want still water?
Could I have still water?
Of course.
Would you like a little bit of elderflower?
I'm just so humble.
Yeah.
Why don't we stick it in there
for the laugh
which bit of island
do you come from
so I am from Kildare
Kildare is
a like sort of
Berkshire to London
in terms of distance
and it's the very
horsey part
of the country
so it's where
the Curragh race course is
and a lot of horse racing
sorry my daughter's
being a cat
hello little cat
oh my god you train your child to bring things in in its mouth Jessica horses and a lot of horse racing. Sorry, my daughter's being a cat. Hello, little cat.
Oh my God, you train your child to bring things in in its mouth.
Jessica.
What's this? Can I have that?
Oh, you're a doggie.
Oh, you're a doggie.
It's obvious, it was a bird.
I will say you're going to have to work harder on your dog material.
I'm not going to patronise her by saying that was a great performance of a dog because I read it as a cat.
It wasn't great.
It would be very unique if she decided to stay like that. If great performance of a dog because I read it as a cat it would be very unique
if she decided
to stay like that
if she identifies
as a dog
when she gets older
yeah
what would they call
what would that be
called
well there is
have you ever seen
this
canine something
yeah
canine or what
I don't know
anyway
there is
a channel
for a documentary
called
The Secret Life
of Human Pups
and it's very fascinating.
Are they the children that were brought up by wolves or dogs?
No, no.
But that's also a great one.
This one is about a group of people around the world
who like to live their lives as pups and they identify as puppies.
And they dress up in quite sort of sexy, leathery clothes.
Oh, it's like a sex thing. Well, that's the question which sort of sexy leathery clothes oh it's like a sex thing well that's the question
which sort of hangs over us for the whole documentary really i felt really sorry for like
there's they go to the international like best human dog convention and there's this one guy
who's representing britain and he's like he's like uh for his um and he's dressed up as a dog and
he's his owner and there's a little bit of sexual tension between the owner and him.
And we kind of do wonder what goes on.
They don't do dogging and things.
Well, we don't know.
Oh my God.
It's just a little bit of the unanswered question.
Why is dogging called dogging actually?
Because of the way dogs do it.
Oh, okay, fine.
I don't think that's it.
Oh, is that not?
I think it's, so here's my thoughts.
We're definitely going to get emails in
to us three poor ladies sitting around going,
but what?
It's dogging.
Let's blue sky think it.
I think dogging might be called dogging
because maybe a lot of people pretend to go out
to walk their dogs.
Oh, that's it.
But actually go and watch people in cars having sex.
And the people in the cars know people are watching them,
so we're doing it for a performative reason.
You're kidding me.
Yes.
And as a performer,
may I take my hat off to any side-specific theatre.
But then I also wonder,
is it that you're sitting there watching almost like a dog?
I wonder, is that an element,
that you're there kind of looking like...
Now, what did you think, Mum?
Dogs might watch.
But do you know the way a dog was sitting,
watching you at the table eating, and you just sort of, Now, what did you think, Mum? Dogs like watching. But do you know the way a dog was sitting watching you at the table eating
and you just sort of like tongue out,
like watching.
I thought it was them mounting them from behind.
Oh, wow.
No, that's doggy style.
That is doggy style.
That is doing it doggy style.
And that is something I would definitely say
I know about.
And the other one,
I will say I'm not so sure
about the etymology of dogging.
Dear readers, please feel free to phone in.
Please don't.
I'm so glad that my daughter walking in as a dog has turned into Doggy Stelen Dogging.
Dogging, yes.
An absentee.
But in this documentary, God love them,
the guy representing Britain as a puppy goes to Germany
to do the International Puppy Convention.
And they all have to have a talent.
Of course it was in Germany.
But it's in Germany and he goes...
Jessica, they're a little freaky deaky over there.
They like...
Well, this is the thing.
So he goes dressed up in his really cute Playtex rubbery,
oh, oh, oh, I'm just a little puppy outfit.
And for his talent, he grabs a crayon in his mouth
and draws something on a page and it's like
look the pup drew and then for all of the other ones they are in proper sort of like gimp outfits
really sexy some of them have like their lads their balls hanging out and for their talents
they do like an absolute striptease and the poor little British puppy is like watching being like
oh I think I got the brief slightly wrong.
It's like, almost like turning up to an orgy
with a cheese board, being like, hi guys.
Oh, you've already started.
I thought we might do snacks first, but okay.
This is a lot more.
Do they do that in Love Island too?
Do they do?
This was, this Love Island seems like a day out
at the convent in comparison. It's not giving me in comparison to the International Human Puppy Convention in Germany.
Let's just quickly talk about Love Island because you and I, I haven't watched last night's actually.
Me neither.
Fine.
It's a little treat for myself.
It's a little bit quiet on the air.
Dry this year.
So my friend said yesterday that he thought the reason it wasn't going very well is because we're not in summer.
We don't, you know, when they go to click to buy the outfit that Blah's wearing, people are in hoodies and woolies and they don't feel.
I like staying in and watching it.
For me, it's my, what I've decided to let go of is Annie, like when people go, oh, it's a guilty pleasure, it's cheap watching.
I don't mind that.
People have soap operas or like sport is just kicking a ball up and down.
You know, plot wise, not a lot happens in a football game.
You know, there's no real drama except for someone falls over pretending every now and again.
But with this, I feel the same thing.
I love the simplicity of it.
It's like a
sort of humble dish of like just potatoes and cheese you know it's just like a lot you do though
yeah what i like as well is that they don't really tend to have chats they tend to do just
constant analysis it's like it would be like if if football games were only two minutes of football and then the pundit speaking for like an hour.
And the editing is on point, like Shanice's little face
that's now become an international meme.
Yeah.
When the girl comes in that, no, anyway.
And actually, almost again, like what we were talking about earlier on,
about like always thinking there's another room where someone else belongs.
Like you take these people, all of whom are gorgeous
and might be the most beautiful people in their town.
And then they keep on sending,
just when you think there couldn't be more beautiful people,
someone who's even more beautiful.
Xena the warrior goddess came in.
Yeah, Xena the warrior.
And suddenly they're the people who are like,
I'm fit, I'm lovely, this is how I look.
But aren't they all pumped up mouths?
Not everyone, no. fact the real the real threats
are the people who come in and they've had nothing done in their natural and then they go in the
morning and they don't put any makeup on and they're making the eggs and i think that she's
one to watch isn't she the newbie there's a girl who's coming in she really doesn't need any makeup
she's stunning that is when you see someone i did uh film this summer with Frida Pinto and Frida Pinto is beautiful.
The most.
It's almost like when they put makeup on Frida, it makes her look like she's still look.
She's I could eat my dinner off her face.
And she's so such a good woman as well.
She is someone who like does so much work with like charities and um and works really like she's been
in the hollywood business since she was like quite young and she just like say one year she went out
and took all with a van of her own accord and took like all of the excess food from a load of award
ceremonies during this sort of ceremonies in hollywood and gave it to a load of homeless
shelters and charities and she did that all off her own back, food waste is my
biggest hatred
Of course everyone's going to be vegetarian now
aren't they?
It's all plant based darling
Mum's got a bit of a
No I have not
I subscribe to it darling
but I think that you should give people a choice
No
For me it's everything I do,
it's we can't live like this anymore.
We are dieting like kings
and thought that we could all live like that forever.
But what we've done is we've taken too much out of
not just the resources on this planet
to fulfil what we thought would be an endless stream of food
and money and clothes and items.
And what we were really doing was we were agreeing to take away from people who are far less fortunate than us so to afford
our avocados we've let people in south america fall into gang warfare over avocados to fall to
um have our beef there's so much land in developing countries where there are poor people,
has had to be soya plants and forests knocked down for soya plants to feed cows.
So it's not like it's, you shouldn't eat an animal.
For me, it's like, it's very much the 10% has been feeding on the riches of other people's lives.
So is that why you've become a pescatarian?
Yeah, generally.
And even that's problematic, generally.
I mean, there's, we're all going to have to change
because the world is running out of space.
And it's almost like we've been,
like Catch Me If You Can,
Leonardo DiCaprio style,
running away with a credit card
and there's been no money in our bank account.
And now all of the bills are coming in
and we can't ignore them.
And that's what it feels like environmentally.
And we're getting to the point, ecologically,
where we might even not be able to get out of it.
I'm just going to put the food on, because I know you're hungry.
No, we've got to pull back.
Yeah, we've got to, but it's gone a little bit beyond that.
We've got to do more than pull back.
What do you think we've got to do?
It's a huge effort.
Governments really need to help us out.
People are like oh what what help
is it of me bringing a plastic bottle everywhere or a reusable bottle the point of anything is
that nothing's going to no one thing's going to fix it veganism is not going to fix um the
environment uh vegetarianism isn't um just banking with a different bank isn't uh petitioning isn't
but all of it together the idea that a community like a warlike spirit, because this will be the next big issue for your kids who is coming in as a dog.
They're not going to care about Brexit or what wars are going on.
This will be there will be climate refugees for her age group.
These are the issues that are going to be facing her when she's doing podcasts at our age. And so it's a multi-pronged approach in terms of who do we bank with? Who do we get
our money with? Starting to do things that are a bit difficult and not nice, but also a general
community spirit. So yes, the one tiny thing you're doing might not help, but the idea that
we're not all collectively giving up is very important and that we're all in some way giving up something and actively doing something creates a spirit that maybe together we
could do it but one small group screaming and another small group going oh bloody hell feck it
is not we all have to do something.
You came from a family of how many?
Three in total.
Three.
So my mother, my sister and myself.
Right.
And did your mum cook?
So mammy, because she was bringing us up on her own,
has a sort of interesting culinary tale in that she was a working mother on her own.
So all of our like
like today I'm not feeling very well and I had meetings in the morning and then an audition in
the afternoon and when I went home I had four slices of white toast and spaghetti hoops on toast
with loads of butter and I was like oh this is my happy place this I'm like this so like tins
freezer toaster, microwave.
Those are still the things that are like my my home cooked feelings.
But Mammy also, when she got married, was a jockey.
So she was an athlete and she couldn't boil an egg.
So they but they sent her off to like. Not Ballymaloe.
Not Ballymaloe.
That wasn't around then.
Ballymaloe.
But not too far off
what's the name for like french cooking like cordon bleu like cordon so they sent her off to a
cordon bleu course like i think maybe my nana gave her a voucher when she got married like here in a
sort of 1980s you'll have to learn to keep your husband away. But so Mammy can just about boil an egg
and put things in the freezer.
And she'll kill me now
if she hears this.
But also can do about
seven dishes of cordon bleu
cooking like gratin dauphinois
really beautifully.
So there's a chasm
in the in-between bit.
But there's
so a lot of like packets
and stuff like that.
But on the other hand,
she does like
chicken a la creme
and gratin dauphinoise
and salmon en croûte
and can do these things.
But yeah, I remember
when we were growing up,
she decided to try baking once
and she made these scones.
And myself and my sister Sinead,
our best game was
who can throw the scone
against the wall
hard enough to break it.
And neither of us won.
I think the biggest loser was the wall in the
end but um yeah we wouldn't come from a baking family okay I'm just gonna put it out there yes
oh this all looks lovely look oh my god have you made accidentally like the Irish flag with the
dinner it's like green white and orange yes baby look this is an accident but like I know look you
said you wanted really healthy. So I've gone.
I'm not indulged, babe.
This looks so lovely.
It's kind of it's very, very healthy.
And a bit come down with me now that I'm looking at it.
Oh, my God.
I when I graduated from drama school, I didn't have an agent. I just assumed I'd come out and immediately go to Hollywood.
And I watched back to back,
non-stop,
Come Dine With Me.
And I'd say there isn't an episode
for the first like five years
of Come Dine With Me
that I haven't seen.
I loved it so much.
Like I got,
yeah, I got really excited.
Do you like cooking programs?
I love,
so I haven't seen that much comedy.
I don't enjoy watching comedy
or it feels like work a lot of the time.
Like I watch it and I have a lot of,
most of my friends are comedians.
But I love watching cookery shows,
especially if there's a competitive element.
Me too, MasterChef.
MasterChef, great British menu.
Bacon.
Love great, I love great British menu.
Upside down take.
You need to take the lid off.
Oh!
It's delicious, Jessie.
Oh, you're sweet.
I won't have you speak ill of this dinner.
It's real nice.
Because we were going really light,
because, you know, we're both trying to be good to ourselves.
I've got music video.
We're just kind of trying to be good.
I did carrot and swede.
That's what it is.
It's so lovely.
Carrot and swede with sweet taste
and then I added a little bit of ginger in it
and some orange zest.
By swede, do you mean turnip?
Is a swede a turnip?
No, I think they're different, aren't they?
The bigger one.
So is a swede different to a turnip?
Yeah.
Oh, it is?
Interesting.
A turnip's a little white one
and a swede is orange inside.
Oh my God, I've been calling swedes turnip all my life. People do. Is that my taste or so? Oh, interesting. A turnip's a little white one and a swede is orange inside. Oh my god, I've been calling swedes turnip all my life.
People do.
Does it make taste the same?
Oh no.
So turnips are the taste of my childhood.
It's the one thing my mammy and my granny would cook loads of.
Bacon, cabbage, potatoes and turnips.
And eating this makes me feel really happy.
Have I asked you what is your go-to dish that you will offer up as are you a hostess I love
one of my favorite things in the world and this is what I miss traveling for work the most is just
having people around my house and having big old dinners I normally invite three people but
accidentally end up inviting 12 everyone has to sit around with food in their laps I love having people around
I normally do lots of bits
I do like my mother taught me
a gratin dauphinois
cheesy potatoes lads
who are you going to call?
everyone loves it
everyone loves it
yeah I don't necessarily have a go-to thing
I'll do lots of salads
I do do lots of big brunches
so for pride every year
I have a kind of LGBTQ plusgbtq plus breakfast morning before
the people go out in march and go to the parade and that's one of my favorite things there's a
picture I quite like of this year I spent loads of effort on the breakfast and then finally I sat
down you know that kind of way the host sits down at the end it goes now I'm going to eat my dinner
and I went to tell an anecdote and I flipped my plate onto the cement in my garden
and it's just a really sad but really funny picture that my friend my best friend Brona
took at an opportune time where I've just got a really sad face and a giant pink
come out to support LGBTQ plus t-shirt with this plate of eggs upside down on the floor
I want to know about stand-up because it just seems like the most petrifying thing to me.
I'm not a comedian, so that's probably why.
But, like, the idea of just presenting yourself to...
Maybe I'm thinking of it in the wrong way,
but, like, a sceptical crowd or, like...
Or maybe they're quite up for it if they're going to see comedy.
Do you not feel like they're sitting there being like,
come on, then, make me laugh?
No, generally people want to have a good time.
They'll always be that idiot.
I think that's the fear mentality that people who hate public speaking have.
So apparently Jerry Seinfeld has a bit about how
people's number one fear is public speaking
and people's number two fear is dying.
So which means that people would rather be dead at a funeral
than have to speak at one.
And that's Jerry Seinfeld's bit, not mine.
But it's funny when something isn't scary to you.
Like I have never done sport.
I cannot imagine what it would be like to go out on grass
and have to like put your foot against a ball
with the knowledge it's going to get into a
net with loads of people watching you that to me would be like oh something would go surely no way
what but for me I've always spoken out like I mean it's not exactly like you're like oh Aisling
you're stuck for chat at the moment like it's it's not the biggest transference of what's already
there when did you start stand up was it because you were acting
because i mean we i yeah i'm not i'm not gonna lie like i didn't i've kind of forgot that you
were in the fall we didn't know you fancied him didn't you as in my character yes no we had yes
i think that's what people wanted to say it was my character was more obsessive in a religious way
i think there was like
a religious obsessive thing
that he'd come back
and the idea
that you could save somebody
that you could be reformed
and that sort of
religious element
to someone that's like
oh you could be
what if you've done
something so awful
but the near death experience
has changed you
could you be reformed
to that sort of interest
so that was a sort of like
odd vibe to the old nurse
um but people really got into that character and it's funny because you are gonna have some
cheese on please you don't have to that was like definitely well aggressively put mother
i just love cheese i am always intrigued by the fact that fruit and cheese work so well together
yeah it's great isn't it i can cut you an apple up if you want do you know what i would love an
apple and cheese one of my favorite things my aunt ever cooked was you know you know toasties cheese
toasty makers she makes so she puts butter on the outside of both sides of the bread obviously
then inside butter as well and then inside she puts cheese which will melt but also apples
so she puts apples into the toasty so when you cut it inside
you've got hot apple which is like a chutney essentially and cheese yeah yeah yeah what a
savory one you spend your time between new york la london you're an international gal some of your
favorite restaurants in those places oh in lond London, it's a place called Parilla.
And I actually found a place.
It's great in Stoke Newington.
And I found it because your man,
I'm pretty sure he's called Ben,
was on Great British Menu.
Oh, was he?
And I liked the stuff he was making.
I was like, oh my God, it's near my house
because that's not far from where I live.
And so I went up and there,
they always give me bread and butter now when I go.
And it's like fresh seaweed sourdough and the butter is whipped so it's almost like
it's caramelized and whipped but it's almost like it's it's sugary now I know oh New York LA
yes oh New York I mean New York just everywhere is great to eat yes the thing I miss so when I
was doing living with yourself which is a Paul Rud Rudd show I was living in New York and the one thing
I miss is
home cooking
because everyone
is
pays such high rents
even the richest people
don't have
really big houses
so
the wealthy
famous celebs
still have relatively
humble houses
comparative to
London or
LA or anything like that
and so no one
there isn't a culture
of going around
to people's houses for roasts or taking your shoes off and just eating with people and
I really miss doing that and living that um so but the plus side is everyone eats out all the time
and the restaurants and takeaways are amazing um I did go there's this bar I really liked in the
West Village called the Hudson Hound which my friends run and that like had proper like Irish food which I really missed um but also where was where did we
go oh I feel like just everywhere was great so it's hard to sort of pin down one place but it
was the cooking element I did miss in New York um LA LA LA, there's a Spanish
or Mexican restaurant
called Gracias Madre.
Yeah, love it.
Which is a vegan veggie place
that you would actually like
and you'd be like,
did I not have meat?
Have you had it?
No.
When we were at Benny's?
No.
It's great.
The coconut bacon.
Yeah, all of this stuff
and I love that.
But yeah,
generally,
Mexican food in LA
is so tasty
because there's such a large Mexican community there.
Don't you think Epois is the most delicious cheese?
Is that what I'm eating?
Yeah.
I can't stop.
It's really good.
It's my new favourite cheese.
It's really good.
Oh, what is it?
Epois.
Terrible name.
Epois.
No, it isn't, darling.
Is that the brand?
No, it's Pois.
All right, well, we're saying it terribly.
P-O-I-S-S-E.
What's it mean? Is that the brand or is that the type of cheese? The type of cheese. Oh, it's Poisse. All right, well, we're saying it terribly. P-O-I-S-S-E. Get emailed. What's it mean?
Is that a brand or is that the type of cheese?
The type of cheese.
Oh, like a brie.
It's in a Poisse.
In a Poisse.
It's so delicious.
Oh, man, I can't.
I know.
It's just the best cheese.
Guilty pleasure food.
I think we know.
Spaghetti hoops, maybe.
That's not guilty enough.
I don't really...
White bread is. I don't like... know, I don't really. White bread is.
I don't like, I believe in health and nourishing yourself,
but I don't feel like attaching guilt to food and stuff like that.
Because I'm like, oh, let's, you know, what do you eat that you're just like,
this is it.
What do I eat that is not good for me?
It's probably drink.
It's probably alcohol.
And what do you drink?
I love all drinks except for
um champagne or cava that makes me get really sick don't like fizzy stuff because i've got
a naturally bubbly personality you see so it just overcompensate it tips me over the edge
so white or red wine uh both white wine does make me a bit like you know what i have a secret about
and i'm not allowed to tell anyone so i try to avoid white wine um red wine a bit like, do you know what I have a secret about and I'm not allowed to tell anyone? So I try to avoid white wine.
Red wine, I really like.
I love whiskey, all sorts.
Irish whiskey.
Irish whiskey, I love.
Jameson's, oh my God,
the nicest whiskey is Dingle whiskey.
I love Dingle.
Oh, Dingle is so nice.
Dingle's the best place in the world.
Do you like Dingle, the area?
The best place in the world.
So my dad was from Dingle
and I got a hamper sent to me
with some Dingle vodka in it.
I was like, what?
Dingle vodka?
Vodka made in Ireland?
Come on, lads.
And their gin has been recently voted
like the best in Europe.
But they sent over my sister
for the bar
because it's from where
the area where my dad is from
for the bar for her wedding.
My sister had,
so she's Irish
and her husband
is british indian so they had like an irish british indian wedding all sustainable so they
had like veggie curries and banana leaves and all this amazing amazing but the food was indian
and so delicious and then the bar was irish so it was like stocked out with dingle uh vodka
but their whiskey they sent over one like 15 year number oh it was like drinkinged out with Dingle, gin and vodka, but their whiskey, they sent over one like 15 year number.
Oh, it was like drinking a hot chocolate.
It was just a little delicious.
I can still taste it now
because I just had some in my little cup.
I know what you're doing.
Speaking about your sister,
your sister was involved in Little Women.
Yes, she is the assistant costume designer.
Yeah.
Did she do, did you have costumes in This way up she's a designer of costumes yeah so
she went from so Sinead was in Boston doing Little Women while I was in New York doing Living With
Yourself which was really special that she was there that's amazing and then we both came back
to film my show and she designed my show so a lot of the colours and aesthetic to it are all down to
Sinead but yeah my little sister is absolutely brilliant and actually Indian
food's become a big part of our life now because of Mads's my brother-in-law's mother is an amazing
cook and so his aunt um she lives in India but his aunt is also an amazing cook and we go down to her
a lot um in a place and are they veggie Mads's mom is and Sinead mostly is as well almost like me so they would lean that way
so Mads grew up with a lot of
Indian food that was veggie
so it's very easy for him
to sort of live like Sinead
but every now and again
he'd have like a big smokehouse steak
and stuff like that
Was your sister Sharon
in This Way Up
kind of relationship
and his family based around
your brother-in-law?
It wasn't again
nothing is it's a
fictional show yeah so it's not based on my life but then there are elements that I'm inspired by
and I'm like oh wow yeah why wouldn't the family be Indian and also it's a family I don't get to
see a lot on TV so I don't get to see my brother-in-law's family on TV and by his family
I don't mean his literal family no um Indian fan British Indian families
of which there are many gorgeous families and I like the idea of like the Irish Indian connection
and us all getting to know each other's cultures and so stuff like that becomes a thing but then
you start making other characters and other people and different things um you know I mean the one
thing that's definitely in it is that like Madhav does make his own sourdough. So in episode one, there's a bit where Vish is making sourdough
and that's absolutely Madhav's.
But yeah,
so that's become a lot more part
of what we eat and love.
And my mom just went out to India
this year over Christmas
for the first time.
And, you know,
we were all like,
Irish people are not good with spice.
Like I remember one time my mother going, geez, that's very spicy what's in that and was a tomato mazel
soup and the spice was pepper and she's like oh god I need a bit of yogurt now or something
um so we were all a bit nervous mommy going to India and she just fell in love with it she just
felt so healthy she just such a glow about her and it is I love the idea of everyone just
integrating with each other's cultures and there's bits for us all to take and at the bottom of it
all is people having a laugh and and and and coming together around a table just like this
and food is a gorgeous way to connect people and at Sinead's wedding for example they had some
bamboo cutlery but mostly it was like eating with your hands traditional uh indian style eating with your hands and you know we were like oh a lot of the irish aunties
and uncles are coming and as if you are not nervous people are grand no one's ever like
too old to be like i couldn't manage that or that's not what i'm used to it's great crack to
try something new and everyone just got involved because it was a different type of wedding and it
was unique to madame and sinead and it was unique to Madeline Sinead.
And it was just a gorgeous day
where you had all of these like Irish aunties and uncles
who would have been meat and two potatoes
and maybe a bit of vegetables,
but one of the vegetables was probably also potatoes,
just eating on a banana leaf with their hands.
And it's just like, yeah, of course,
it's just like get involved.
So that was a gorgeous food day in my life.
Do you eat the plane food?
As in food on the plane?
Oh, sorry.
I thought it was quite like the plane food.
Like the bread, the waffles.
I love plane food.
As in aeroplane food
yeah
it's so exciting
I've
so I get
the vegan
I still get a thing
about hotels
and aeroplane food
where there's still
an element of excitement
childhood excitement
and even though
if you were to take
aeroplane food
out of an aeroplane
you'd be like
what is this bullshit
where am I prison
when you're actually
on an aeroplane
the little oh little things I really still enjoy that little part here a little part there
whether i'm in there there's a video uh yeah i still get i always eat everything and what's your
room service um choice because you know you said that you've been living in hotels like yeah that's
the one thing i got really so i was doing a, which is when I was doing a Frida Pinto in Italy.
And I was like, oh my God,
you were living in Rome for six weeks.
Oh my God.
But I was living in Rome in a hotel
for six weeks in like the Oxford Circus of Rome
or like the Times Square of New York.
And there's only so many evenings you can watch
or eat from the room service menu.
And it's all pasta.
Remember when I said to you when you text, I was like, I can't really do any more pasta.
And there is such amazing Italian food.
But I think for me, pasta always reminds me of university and nonstop eating pasta and pesto and tomatoes.
And that's the only thing we would eat.
And so for me me that much pasta
and again being in rome where they're like hi i'm trying not to eat that much dairy or wheat at the
moment they're like what else is there they're just like having none of it and so my favorite
place in rome was a sushi restaurant right beside the hotel i know the two you've changed babe i
loved it so much and with myself and eleanor Tomlinson who's a flame haired
beauty in Poldark
she's in the movie as well
and we would go to
this sushi restaurant
almost every night
because there was
one sushi roll
that had little bits
of chips on top of it
and I was like
oh my god it's sushi
but with chips
what could be better
and we made the same
joke every night
we'd open the door
and be like
who went in Rome
and went into
our sushi restaurant
what would be
your last supper
you start a main
pud
and drink of choice
so
is it desert
so I have two questions
for you please
before I answer
is it
desert island
or is it like
I'm about to die tomorrow
no
it's whatever you would prefer
I can't bear I'm about to die
well it's whatever you prefer
whatever's going to make
a better gag
interesting
a better gag
oh well
the thoughts of my death
will make me gag
I think
it'll be some sort of potato
without a doubt
that's the starter
starter will be some kind of like
I think maybe like chopped up tuna or like like a taco Without a doubt. That's the starter? Starter will be some kind of like,
I think maybe like chopped up tuna or like a taco, like a fish taco.
I love a good fish taco or like...
Not a sashimi.
You know that poke?
Is it poke?
No, there's poke, but then there's also...
Oh, ceviche.
No, there's the other one that you love.
Tuna tartare.
Tuna tartare.
Yeah, tuna tartare, butare yeah tuna tartare but I think
you can get a ceviche
or poke
I like things dressed
in a bit of a dressing
that's my like
yum yum yum yum
a little bit of
bonjour citrus
okay
then
for mains
even though I don't eat meat
if it's my
gonna die meal
yeah
it would be my granny's
bacon cabbage potatoes and turnip oh lovely and that, it will be my granny's bacon, cabbage, potatoes and turnip.
Oh, lovely.
And that would be the way my granny did it.
I presume the overarching flavour is salt.
Throughout everything, if you're looking for like, what are the notes left on your palate?
That is salt.
And she used to like cook the cabbage afterwards in the bacon water.
So you get like the kind of salt in the cabbage
mash with a shed load of butter you don't fry the bacon you cook it in water yeah boiled bacon
oh yeah boiled bacon yeah kind of like a christmas ham okay so they would boil it and then put it in
the oven and then get the crispy thing on the top so i would probably if it's my last day on earth
have my granny's bacon cabbage potato and turn it mashed turn condiment do you need it mustard
would you never know it's just you don't do that so that's the thing you just mash is the sort of
condiment i suppose the mashiness of the butter yeah amazing and what would be your drink what
would be my drink would be maybe an espresso martini so I can wait up to see the apocalypse.
So I'll definitely not fall asleep.
Put?
Dessert would be a really rich chocolate mousse with a raspberry... Cooley.
Cooley.
Or else maybe a pecan slice.
Oh, yes!
And you know what I realised recently, and I was really delighted with myself,
like when you discover that you genuinely like celery, you're like, oh God, this is great.
Not many people genuinely like it, and here I am eating it.
I realised my favourite bit of the pecan slices is roast pecans.
And the other day I got a load of pecans, fired them into the oven,
and now they're just my little nibble around the house.
Pecans, unroasted, are not that nice.
But put them in the oven, tasty, tasty.
It brings out the sort of like...
Yeah, I get that.
Yeah, quality of them.
Also, spending time like...
I talk about this a lot
but I'm obsessed with Gilmore Girls.
Mmm!
And I'm imagining like
your time in Boston and New York
and you're having a pecan pie,
a little slice,
maybe hanging out in Connecticut.
I really used to love
the Gilmore Girls growing up
because again,
it was a family that didn't look like any other family Girls going up because again, it was a family
that didn't look like any other family.
And I loved the idea that it was a mother and a girl.
And that sort of almost sister,
almost like we're all learning this at the same time.
Family structure was just a real relief to see.
And myself, Mammy and Sinead would watch that together.
That was a thing we watched together.
And it was like watching,
oh, imagine a family of just women where it's almost like there are no roles we're just the three of
us trying to work out what the world is together because we also lived out in the countryside so
it's not like there was like and we have a huge extended family family's got loads of sisters and
stuff like that and i have another two aunts on my dad's side as well who were a bit of like the
village raising you but they weren't living
right beside us or anything
and the idea was like
the same with Little Women
the movie
like the fact that Sinead
was working on it
was so emotional for us
because that was another thing
that felt like us
like it was just a mother
and daughters and sisters
and that's kind of
when you talk about
what part of my show
is fiction or not
for me it's just the essence
of sisters and family and siblings together and a different type of family structure
and the language between them and that that for me is where I love writing and finding with people
but little women as well little women and the Gilmore girls they were our oh that looks a bit
like us there that's our world you know and there's no dad walking and
going honey I'm home or oh dad you're so funny or any of that which was just a foreign concept to us
so that I always loved what are you writing at the moment are you always writing yeah I'm always
writing uh with the hope of a series two and then also a film I'm writing at the moment um I find writing is my hardest loneliest job and I don't
necessarily love it um I hate being on my own quite a lot and even though like Sharon's an
amazing producer and like everyone who gives notes are great they're all over email predominantly
and I find that really lonely rather than I'm much better when I have someone in a room
because there's just a humans aren't supposed to be
on our own hermits it doesn't do our mental health any good it doesn't to look at people in the eye
when you're talking or get feedback is everything I can't stand oh yeah I don't mind my own company
living wise and even in relationships being independent working on my own without someone to throw something. It's so, and I think with
writing, when I, if I write on my own for standup, that evening I'll be able to give it to someone
or show it to someone. With writing, like I wrote my show like a year and a half ago and you only
got to see it like a couple of months ago. Like it takes ages before anyone gets to see or enjoy
your work. And I don't write it for myself
you write it for other people to watch and that's the very lonely bit I found that incredibly lonely
writing the show so a bit of me is like oh no do I go back into that now you get a little bit
yeah right I mean well I'm sure there will will be a second and the film film is an idea for ages
uh kind of I'm working on that with the
production company at the moment but that's something i want to write it's been an idea
swirling around for ages but you're you're busy but that's how you like it i do i have a circusy
sort of lifestyle yeah thanks for fitting us in yeah oh no god i've really managed to make it like
guys i've just no no no but you had just come from an audition, by the way, and you'd come and like...
But this is a joy.
Also, to be cooked for is such a special thing
by a little mummy and daughter welcoming you to your home.
I did nothing today.
She really embarrassed herself.
You didn't answer me at the door.
You came downstairs three minutes late after I was here.
I'd already had my wee and taken my jacket off
and my shoes and socks.
You didn't even kiss me.
I let myself down
you really did but you did put lip yeah yeah yeah i put lip in you did um uh lastly uh your
karaoke song please ashley oh my karaoke song now here's a little bit of my problem with karaoke
i believe that we get to perform for a living and we are so lucky to get to do it and i believe that
karaoke should be kept for people who don't get to perform for a living.
I completely agree.
And sometimes when I go to karaoke
with other actors and singers,
it's just like, oh my God, I'm so embarrassed.
Bring me your high on the hill.
And you're like, all right, mate,
we've all been to school.
You know, it's just a bit,
I think it should be for out of tune people
who are like, oh, I'm loving angels instead.
And I'm like, yes, today is your five minutes.
Own it.
I agree.
I mean, I do like Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus.
I think because I'm Irish, I like to do the like, you know, Sinead O'Connor's like,
We've all need, now need, now need.
You did that really well in This Way Up with the Cranberries.
Oh, yeah.
That was incredible.
That was very joyous for myself and Sharon to sing.
And people keep on tagging us doing that at karaoke now and atting us in.
And we cracked each other up doing that so much because we really wanted to come across as great singers.
And a bit of us were like, oh, people will find this funny, but they also might ask us to be professional singers after it.
Like, because we were so arrogant. It really good it was really but that um anything
where there's a bit of i like singing you know wrecking ball or diana vickers compares
diana vickers used to give a bit of that wasn't like that sort of stuff um ashley you've been
fabulous everything you guys are what a joy um i i'd love you to just come back every time you
need a home-cooked meal yeah oh my gosh and um thanks so much and i can't wait for this way up
to come back because it needs to because it was such an important uh piece of work so thank you
i might have a little cry now Mum, I haven't laughed like that since Alan Carr.
No, she's so, so clever and so funny.
And brilliant.
Brilliant.
I'm so happy and I feel very lucky that we've just had her over for dinner.
So lucky.
Jessie, her porcelain skin and your atomic peel was actually something to behold.
I didn't actually have a peel.
What did you have?
I had a few different little, like, I had like needling and stuff.
Jessica, you're...
It's all natural.
That does not look natural to me.
It's mum.
It's what happens.
You make your face have a bit of a trauma to then promote more collagen.
That's what it is.
Jessica.
It's all natural.
You sodding Botox or collagen injections, your face looks like a turkey cock's arse.
It is bright, bright bright red i know and i'm a bit worried come on your heads anything like this anyway um thank you so much ashling for coming over what an amazing woman. Amazing woman. So influential.
Clever.
Inspiring, clever, funny.
Just brilliant.
I love her.
And thank you for kicking off season nine for us.
What a way to start it.
Yep.
She kind of, I feel like she felt a bit like family.
Yeah.
But maybe she makes everyone feel like that because she's just wonderful.
She's amazing.
yeah but maybe she makes everyone feel like that because she's just wonderful she's amazing we have got some fantastic guests lined up for this season and it's going to be wonderful but
please do email us and let us know what you'd like to hear more about maybe not dogging i thought the
dogging was actually really informative mum actually you learnt something new
I did
please email us at hello at tablemannerspodcast.com
we'd love to hear from you
and tell us who you want on
mum are you still happy that you're doing this with me?
ecstatic
thank you for listening
please give us a rating
five stars
maybe don't give a comment
mum likes to read them too much
and I don't think it's good for her health.
Thank you for listening
and we'll see you next week on Table Manners.
The music you've heard on Table Manners
is by Peter Duffy and Pete Fraser.
Table Manners is produced by Alice Williams.