Taking 20 Podcast - Ep 60 - Monster Series - Lich Better Have My Money

Episode Date: February 14, 2021

Happy Valentine's Day!  The Monster Series resumes this time focusing on those alpha dogs of the necromantic RPG world:  liches.  How do DMs use them in their campaign?  What tactics should they take on the battlefield?  Tune in and find out.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to episode 60 of the Taking 20 podcast, the Monster Series. This time, the lich better have my money. The sponsor this week is Nude Beaches. The people that go there probably aren't the people you want to see there. Please subscribe or give us a like or rating wherever you're listening to this podcast. I would greatly appreciate it. Also, if you have any feedback, please send it to me at feedback at taking20podcast.com. I'd love to hear from you. I just want to go on record right now and say it was so hard to name this episode. I mean, it could have been Life's a Lich, Then You Don't Die, or Liches Be Crazy, or I'm Rick James Lich.

Some fields are just more fertile for bad comedy than others, and this episode was certainly one of them. What is a lich? A lich is an undead spellcaster who's tried to extend his or her life beyond the normal duration through magical means. Usually dark, evil, magical means. The term lich is derived from an old English word for corpse. In cemeteries, the gate where the coffin and the funerary procession usually entered was commonly referred to as the Lich Gate. An old term for cemeteries was actually Lichburg. The Lich, by the way, is an ancient creature in the game of D&D. It originally appeared

in the Greyhawk supplement of the original D&D rule set, 1975. When we start taking a look at liches, there are some common characteristics across 5e and Pathfinder where I'm going to be focusing my efforts this week. In both gaming systems, rules as written, liches are evil. Paizo and Wizards of the Coast both have little to no flex on this. But I'm going to repeat what I said in episode 59. I encourage GMs to think outside the box. In that episode, I forgot to mention that there's a resource that came out with D&D 3.5 called the Libris Mortis that had good aligned liches inside the covers. Second edition actually had a creature called an arch lich that was a good version of a lich.

So think outside the box. Do you want a neutral lich or maybe even a good one? Go for it. Instead of becoming a lich via a vile ritual that we'll talk about in a minute, perhaps they became a lich as an unfortunate side effect of being exposed to, I don't know, large amounts of life extension magic. Not to harp on it, but I really love the thought of players hearing there's a lich in a remote forest. They gear up to go kill it, only to find it living its eternal existence using its spells to heal injured forest animals and take care of the sick and dying. The party bursts in and the lich looks up at the party and says, oh hello chaps, picking up or dropping off? The lich just has to hope the party can see past its resting

lich face. That being said, 5e liches are required to feed their phylactery living souls periodically, so it's hard to do that as a neutral character and practically impossible as a good creature. All liches are undead. They're intelligent schemers and planners. If you look at their stats as defined, besides strength, they are all very, very high. The process of becoming a lich is a guarded secret, but no matter what the secret is, and it can be anything for your campaign world, it is expensive and difficult. There are a lot of skill checks involved and a lot of very high level spells. Liches look like gaunt and skeletal humanoids with withered flesh stretched tight

across bones. Eyes have succumbed to decay a long time ago, but points of light burn in the empty sockets. They're usually wearing the molded remains of fine clothing and jewelry that is dulled by the passage of time. And all liches have a phylactery, and it's important to understand about these and keep these in mind before you drop a lich in your campaign. The phylactery is what allows a lich

to be immortal. Construction of a phylactery requires fine craftsmanship, arcane wards, traditionally an amulet in the shape of a small box like a sealed metal box containing strips of parchment that have magical phrases written on them, transcribed very carefully by the person before they became a lich. But it can take the form of any item possessing any sort of interior space into which arcane sigils can be written. Sigils of naming, binding, immortality, and dark magic may be scribed in silver or gold. As long as the phylactery exists, if the lich's body is slain, within days a new body forms next to the lich's phylactery, coalescing out of some glowing smoke that issues from the device. Destruction of the phylactery puts the lich at risk of permanent

death, so the lich, since they're smart, remember, hides it in a well-hidden, well-guarded location. In 5e, a lich must periodically feed souls to the phylactery to sustain the magic preserving its body and consciousness, but that's not true in Pathfinder. A lich that fails or forgets to maintain its body with these sacrificed souls begins to physically fall apart, and if they've prepared appropriately, they might eventually become a demi-lich. More on demi-lichs shortly. All liches in both 5e and Pathfinder collect spells and magic items. They have all of eternity to do so. They also have a badass spell repertoire. They are high-level casters with access to spells of nearly every level. Their default stat blocks, if you look at the default spells that they have prepared, they have a ton of damaging and debilitating spells. All liches have ready

access to magic items because they're incredibly wealthy, they have had eternity to go collect these magic items, and they may even have underlings that can bring magic items to them, besides the fact that they could spend extended time and resources crafting the magic items themselves. They also have potions and scrolls and libraries of spell books, wands, and maybe a staff or two. They have no qualms about putting these treasures to use whenever its lair comes under attack. Now, let's focus on 5e very specifically and talk about how the liches are defined there a little bit differently than Pathfinder.

Liches in 5e are defined as universally insane. They are also bound to the inner planes by the transformation process due to being forced to remain close to their phylactery. Liches mostly live a solo existence. I mean, they occasionally take interest in the world around it, most often when some great event reminds it of the life it once led. Liches haunt the abodes that it favored in life. Remember, these are ancient locations, like ruined towers and abandoned keeps and lost tombs. I doubt you'll

find a lich occupying the, I don't know, the produce aisle of the local Circle K. That doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Or maybe it does in your campaign. Liches are universally in 5e brilliant, cunning, and use traps in their lairs. They sometimes collect underlings, especially undead and constructs, that will follow their commands without question. Jumping over to the Pathfinder game system. The exact method for becoming a Lich is different for each spellcaster. It's left to the GM's discretion, but it should involve expenditures of hundreds of thousands of gold pieces, numerous deadly adventures, and a number of difficult skill checks over the course of months, years, or maybe even decades.

Transformation from a human or an elf or a dwarf, centaur, whatever, into a lich affects different souls differently. Some die from the process. Some go insane. Some become liches. The only canon lich ritual that's defined that I could find is what's called

the Eternal Apotheosis. It involves potentially killing a whole bunch of people and must take place where the caster began their descent into evil or committed some sort of atrocity. So yeah, that probably leads to an evil lich. Lich in Pathfinder is a template that can be applied to any creature that you want. It could be an orc sorcerer, a nymph cleric, a centaur oracle, an elven witch. Liches can come from a wide variety of creatures, even monstrous creatures. Liches live an isolated life, and that long-term isolation... life. Liches lead an isolated undeath. That can tend to drive them insane over time. I mean, imagine you right now became a lich. You still care about your family, your spouse, your daughter, and of course, the son of a lich.

Moving on. Eventually, your family will start passing away, and all that's left are people with increasingly tenuous connections to you. Grandchildren, great-grandchildren, great-great-grandchildren, grand-nieces. I mean, you go even further down the line. And over time, those family connections become less and less important to you, causing you to withdraw from the world even more. Suppose you want to use a lich as a big bad evil guy. How do you do it?

Well, my fellow DMs and GMs, they are high-level big bad evil guys. They are the pinnacles of necromantic arts. Your world may actually require help from an evil god or power to become a lich. Because remember, the exact process either isn't well-defined, cleverly hidden, or changes from person to person to person who wants to become a lich. If they have to solicit that help, they may have to serve that higher power in some way while they're in lich form. Point being, liches aren't going to be rank and file members of an army. These are leaders, rulers, necromantic forces of nature that can form plans that take years or even centuries to come to fruition.

Another thing they can be used for is guardians of very, very important artifacts. Imagine a monk that's been changed into a lich that has been created to guard a lost king's crown of power. Flurry of blows plus necromantic damage for every physical strike equals... yikes. In a world with a necromantic kingdom, it would make sense for liches to occupy the top positions of power. But things to always keep in mind. Every lich had a reason for becoming a lich. keep in mind, every lich had a reason for becoming a lich. It could be that they wanted to continue work on a long-term project plan or scheme. As I said in episode 29 about intelligent undead,

the lich's greatest ally is time. I mean, if you were a creature who didn't have to worry about a relatively short mortal life, why would you take risks when a bunch of humans come sniffing around? Liches are powerful opponents, and low-end parties really can't challenge them at all. In most worlds, high-level PCs are really rare. So if a group of high-level PCs has formed and they become a threat, why not seal up your lair, hide all the entrances, post powerful wards and creatures as guards, and wait 50 years. That human wizard loses her faculties and isn't really a threat anymore. That dragon-born monk develops bad knees and can't kick. The dwarven cleric retires to a training position within her church. When that high-level threat is passed and there aren't any powerful PCs to challenge you,

then resume the parts of your decades-long scheme that require interaction with the outside world. So it could be some sort of plan or scheme why they became a lich. It could be some unfinished business why someone becomes a lich. That there is someone they need to kill, some revenge they need to take, some accomplishment they need to achieve before they are willing to actually let themselves die. A third reason why something can become a lich is because they fear death. That simple. They fear the afterlife and they fear what will happen to them when they shuffle off

the mortal coil and they go to whatever judgment looks like in your world. Whether that's Phrasma and Pathfinder, they go to the Fugue Plane and Forgotten Realms, or whatever it happens to be in your particular campaign setting. Alright, so let's talk about Liches on the Battlefield. First of all, I want to wholeheartedly recommend the blog and the book, The Monsters Know What They're Doing by Keith Amon. I've mentioned it before in this podcast, and I adore this book so much. The tactics and spells are tailored towards D&D 5th edition, but there's good information there for all DMs

and GMs, regardless of your gaming system. Universal advice, do not throw the lich in as soon as you can. Big bad evil guys, I believe, need to be hinted at, suggested, rumored about before the PCs ever learn who they are, what they are, or even if they're the big bad evil guy they're hunting for. In the first season of Critical Role, for those of you that have watched it, the Briarwoods, and I'm not going to spoil anything, the Briarwoods are hinted at, suggested, you find out some rumors about them before they are revealed to be what they actually are and what they've done to merit attention. If you do have rumors about your big bad evil guy or hints and suggestions of them, make them scary. The dread things done by them, their capability to cause

harm to others, especially those that the PCs love, the NPCs they have fallen for, or the NPCs they consider friends. Show the fear of the big bad evil guy or the NPCs they consider friends. Show the fear of the big bad evil guy that the powerful lieutenants hold, especially if the lieutenants that the PCs just fought pushed them to the limits and they barely came out ahead. Well, this morgue nearly kicked our asses, and it's afraid of whoever this Azug the Destroyer is. Have them learn more and more about Azug the Destroyer as time goes. Then when they finally face Azug, it'll put fear into their hearts before the Lich aura

ever gets the chance to do so. Liches are resistant or immune to many damage types. Piercing, slashing, necromantic damage, diseases, and so forth. So make them confident on the battlefield, but not cocky. Remember, they are incredibly intelligent and they've been in fights before. Encounters with liches should be memorable. Make them unique. Give liches their due descriptions about what they look like and how they behave and the way they walk and the voice that they have. Whatever it turns out to be. Whatever you can come up with to be unique for that Lich. Give each Lich a unique array of spells and items.

They should have motives of their own, just like all good bad guys do. Consider giving them powers that the PCs don't have and that aren't in the manual. Additional legendary actions unique to their life or transition into Lichdom, like damaging spells, party debuffs, self-healing, get creative with it. Have them surrounded by supporting creatures, undead, constructs, summon creatures. They will bombard the PCs with spells that will debilitate and damage them and they don't engage in melee unless they absolutely have to. And then, only if they have contingencies to avoid death or destruction of their body. Now you may be thinking, well Jeremy, yeah, the PCs can destroy their body, but you said that the Lich reforms at the phylactery.

That's true. Without all their stuff. The magic robes, staff, bracers, rings that they carry with them. Gone. They drop wherever that body was left. And that shit's expensive and hard to replace. So they will lose all that stuff only if they absolutely have to.

More likely, they will have spell contingencies like greater invisibility, teleport, dimension door, or some other method of escape, or an item that gives them those abilities. These creatures are centuries old, brilliant, and have a vested interest in preserving their undeath. You think they're going to get caught by their pants down by a magic missile spell? Lich, please. Liches are almost universally described as having some sort of mental issue, as I mentioned earlier, insane or at risk of becoming so. I was reading the book

Altered Carbon by Richard K. Morgan, and I found a very interesting quote that could apply to liches. When you live that long, things start happening to you. You get too impressed with yourself. You think you're God. Suddenly the little people, 30, maybe 40 years old, well, they don't really matter anymore. You've seen whole societies rise and fall, and you start to feel like you're standing outside of it all. None of it really matters to you, and maybe you'll start snuffing those little people out like picking daisies if they get under your feet. It's a great book, by the way. Also a very good series that you can go watch on Netflix.

But I love the book. That's always my preferred media. But that quote, when I read it, opened my eyes about the eternal perspective. When you're four millennia old and immune to so much, what do the problems of a species that only lived for 100 years mean to you? Oh no, the city is burning to the ground. Well, see you in 20 years when it's rebuilt and back to normal. Joseph the Lich, there's a plague ravaging the world. What should we do? And this is my problem. Why? Good luck with that. Now, when it comes to liches, there are special variants of liches, two of which that I want to mention specifically. Since I've already talked about mind flayers in episode 49, I want to talk about the alhoon, which is a mind flayer who has become a lich. Nasty baddie. All the advantages of both mind

flayers and liches. Go give that episode a listen if you want to learn more about mind flayers, but an alhoon can be a great big bad for a campaign. Another special type of lich that we can run into is called a Demi-Lich. These are 5th edition liches that didn't adequately feed their phylactery with souls. They are no weaker of an enemy, as a matter of fact, they're stronger in some ways. They don't need a physical body anymore, and their soul is infused not only into the phylactery, but multiple soul gems. So you still have the phylactery to destroy and you've got to find all these soul gems to destroy as well to fully destroy a Demi

Lich. It boils down to this. Liches are not run-of-the-mill undead. They're intelligent, devious, and live for centuries or millennia. Don't just treat them as a stronger version of a mummy or an uglier version of a vampire. They are big bad evil guys in their own right and they should serve as a force for maybe an entire campaign from level 1 to 18 or 20. If you do want to drop them in, customize them to fit your campaign. Add or change the abilities that they have, the spells they wield, the magic items they carry. They are intelligent. They will likely learn about the PCs and wield, the magic items they carry. They are intelligent. They will likely learn about the PCs and be ready to counter their strongest abilities. Make sure their

phylactery is carefully hidden and warded against easy discovery, maybe even completely bricked in into a room that has no physical entrance. Give hints about this bad guy's existence and give rumors about the Lich before you ever deploy it on the battlefield. Slowly and gradually reveal the threat that this big bad evil guy poses to the PCs. Give them a healthy fear of him before they ever see him on the battlefield. And you will have a great big bad evil guy for your campaign. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. Episode 60, more of the monster series, Lich Better Have My Money.

Thanks again to this week's sponsor, Nude Beaches. If you don't go to one, it's probably because you're clothes-minded. My name is Jeremy Shelley, and I hope that your next game is your best game.