Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Arrested in Attro City - C02 Ep 04 - Give It the Old College Spy
Episode Date: May 17, 2023The party follow a lead and explore the Alchemist and Wulfman’s alma mater, Lofton College! Check out our merch and follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and more: https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheS...tinkyDragon Go to http://hellofresh.com/16dragon and use code 16dragon for 16 free meals plus free shipping. Go to http://rtxaustin.com to buy your badge! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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This is a Rooster Teeth Production.
Best wishes to all you Bronze Scouts.
Burrow your way into the Stinky Dragon.
Knock back our latest Bev.
Armored and dangerous. It's a mixture of peg yolk,
creamed oil, a dash of brown sugar, underground dark rust coffee topped with nutmeg and boltmeg.
One pour of this percolation is enough to leave you wide-eyed, stalked, and bushy-tailed.
Previously, our adventurers became felonious fugitives at large,
fleeing from coughs on the showery streets of Atro City.
But thanks to some newly found friends, the alchemist and Quill,
the party was able to skedaddle safely in the sewers.
Now on a quest to clear their names and uncover the true culprit of their crimes,
they travel to Area 15 in search of Zuzu, the Abralian Magician,
but find a more abrasive alien obstructing their investigation,
Limber Lizzy.
Round up a refreshment, let's resume this rank recollection.
I like how you, we deepen your voice for in post during that deep in or do we raise it?
But you still are talking like this.
I thought we raised his like we heightened his voice because he's the he's the little dragon from the last adventure.
Did you not listen to the to the episode?
Yes, I did.
I know.
Little peek behind the curtain. Yeah yeah episode one has just come out publicly
uh we're recording this like the day after it's come out yeah i i think he sounds like fred uh
flintstone when he's recording like when we what we hear he's like hey barney
it's more like yogi bear yeah you said hey barney but it's hey boo-boo
It's more like Yogi Bear.
Yeah.
You said, hey, Barney, but it's hey, Boo Boo.
Well, yeah, you're right.
Yeah, you're right.
I'm getting my hand up.
What's in this? A picnic basket.
Hello, everyone.
Welcome to Tales from the Stinky Dragon.
My name is Gustavo Sorolla.
I am your dungeon master.
I'm joined by our four intrepid players who are going to introduce them with no issues at all.
They are.
I will start. Hello, my name is
Elga Von Brass
and I'm Barbara Dunkelman who plays
precious little Elga. And
Elga is a what
class and species?
Elga is a female half-elf
vampire barbarian.
And Blaine?
Do I say my name
or do I say my character's name? say my characters oh my god as fast as possible
what we were trying to do every time barbara said her character then her you are extending
this further you are extending this further hold on hold on i gotta get the i get it
hey there it's chip painy i'm a tiefling rogue uh uh i'll voiced by i'm voiced by I'm Blaine Gibson
Hello
I'm Blaine
Without a flaw
Just gets worse every week somehow
I'm not used to the introductions
It's our fourth time doing it
It isn't also
It's not the fourth time
It's also like our hundredth time doing it
If you count every single episode
Chris made us do it during the mini campaign as well Oh true true He did I'm Chris Damaris It's also like our hundredth time doing it every single episode the
Mini campaign as well. Oh, yeah, I'm Chris Tamaris and I'm playing
Bernie Barney
Changes every episode
Human cleric an old man Pennywise very wise
Very good gum this today. Very gum-gum today.
No, I like this version.
I like the...
Pick behind the curtain.
We're all still workshopping our voices.
Barbara's perfected it.
Let's not besmirch the perfect name of Barbara Duncoman, okay?
Consummate professional.
Five more episodes and we'll have our voices locked in.
John, please, can you introduce
yourself? This is very unprofessional. We've all introduced
ourselves.
My name is John Reisinger and I am playing Matty
Confucius, who is an Eric Cochran
ghost monk.
Incredible. Impeccable.
Can anybody besides John spell
Confucius?
Confucius. No.
Go for it, Barbara.
C-O-N F-I-S-E-U-S-E.
That's it.
Look at you.
You get an inspiration die, Barbara.
Yay!
I can't even spell Chris's last name.
In real life.
I only know that because I just went into
the Stinky uh discord group that
that uh the fans made which is incredible uh and they were starting the wikipedia pages for this
campaign and they had spelled a few of the names wrong and i actually went in and yeah corrected
them i've seen a few people make an attempt at my character's name as a whole and it's it's just
even matide i've seen some interesting spellings of it i also love that something i did on purpose was my character's
name is elga like e-l-l-g-a but because of the accent i wanted it to be up in the air whether
or not it was elga or helga oh yeah like people put the h in parenthesis being like
maybe so where where are we on the story right now well before we get into that
yeah i'm gonna hit you guys with an arrow of role-playing warm-up oh what arrow
a-r-o-w arrow of role-playing warm-up uh you rolled our d100 for us in an effort to keep us moving along. 17.
We have a question here from ICLunch7483 on Reddit,
who asked, what would be your character's at-bat music?
I will start with mine.
Mine would be, I'm a big fan of Phantom of the Opera.
And so I think it would be that very orchestra, you know, organ piano.
But just that on repeat because it's very stupid.
Just that, the melody of that just over and over again.
I like that a lot.
Chip Haney's would 100% be a playlist of yacht rock songs so he'd come out to like Margaritaville
or you know like
What a Fool Believes and he'd be
doing that kind of like booty shuffle
power walkout. You probably have like
Journey in there. Yeah
again just another version of Blaine
Yeah so
Chip Haney's looking for his
Lost Shaker Assault right? Exactly he's popped a flip flop yeah so uh so uh chip haney's looking for his lost shaker assault right exactly
he's popped a
flip-flop whatever that song's
lyrics are i don't get any of these references
i got the phantom of the opera reference
though that i can get
uh barney's
i just i just really
quickly looked up some old music
um uh benny
goodman's Memories of You.
That's a good one, yeah.
It does a duck.
Matide.
If I were to have a song that would, uh, bring me out to this, this game of baseball,
um, I've been, I've always been a big fan of this, uh, this magical productions that
I used to see where they use, uh, uh, some magical spells like thaumaturgy and stuff
like that in order to have this display of images move in motion with sound and light
and everything in a dark room.
And there was a production
of that called, I just got into like a different
accent there. Yeah, you don't speak German there?
Yeah.
French is hard. French is a hard one.
There is a great show
called Amelie and I love
the soundtrack from that show.
It's a great feature.
So, huge fan.
Lots of accordion. Oh, God's gift to man is the accordion. So, huge fan. Lots of accordion.
Oh, God's gift to man
is the accordion. I've met Amelie
in a couple of years
into my vampirism.
She's a very nice lady.
Still working on the accent, guys.
Just bear with us. Few more episodes and we've got them wrapped in.
It's perfect.
I felt like a little Borat came out there.
That's what I want.
I want Elga just every once in a while,
just kind of brush elbows up with Borat
and then go right into Elga back in.
That's all I want.
Oh, you know, Elga does like Borat a lot.
She saw that film four times.
My wife.
My wife.
This show is silly.
You climb the creaking wooden stairwell up
until you reach the second floor,
what appears to be a large attic
with the same vat of glowing blue liquid
coming through the floor.
Barney, these stairs could use some work.
Sorry, go ahead.
A voice calls from the other side of the vat.
You think you can wallop into Area 51
and I wouldn't know?
You peer around the blue vat and find a long table surrounded by a few Abrelions.
You recognize one at the head of the table. A slimy green Abrelion with spindly rubbery lips.
Let Lizzy explain something to you, Ortiz.
We Abrelions look after our own, so you're never gonna find Zuzu.
But guess you have something in common with him now. Nobody never gonna find Zuzu. But guess you have something in
common with him now. Nobody's
gonna find you either.
Get him, boys.
Three Abrelians leap out from their chairs and charge after you.
Everyone needs to roll initiatives.
Oh, come on. Well, if you want,
my last one was the last Nat 20 when we
recorded, but now I've rolled a one.
So you take it.
You won.
Gustavo Sorolla.
How come you didn't roll initiative, Mateed?
Oh, because I'm dumb.
And this is my first time playing D&D.
So four.
16.
I think I rolled a 17.
You did.
And I did a 15 for Elga.
The vertical line and the little slanty guy, that's a one and a seven, Blaine.
You'll learn them.
Well, okay.
I'm going to let that one slide.
Yeah.
You get that one, Gus, okay?
You got me this time.
Once you've got the initiative,
I have a question about the setting that we're in.
Yeah, go for it.
I can talk and do this at the same time.
We're in a room,
and you said there's like a big vat in the middle of the room?
Yeah, like a big vat in the middle of the room? Yeah, like a big vat
with that glowing blue soda pop.
You all talked about soda pop in the
last episode that comes through from
the ground floor up through to
the second floor. Is it like an above
ground vat that we're looking at that's like
big and taking up part of the room?
It's like, imagine going to
a brewery and there's like a big
tank, you know, with beer.
Like similar, but see-through.
You can see the liquid inside of the tank.
Does this at all look like the liquid that we saw coming out of any of the pipes when we were underground?
I'll tell you what, do me a favor and roll me a wisdom check and we'll see.
I thought that was poo-poos.
Yeah, this is more blue-bloos.
I rolled a three, so I'm guessing I'm not going to know.
You think it might be.
It's covering your eyes.
So it's not.
A few of them, they had really good initiative rolls,
and a bunch of them are going before you guys.
I think you should re-roll theirs.
Should I?
Wait, and how many are there?
There are three Abrilians
plus Lizzie. The boss.
A total of four. Who is also an Abrilian,
correct? Correct. Okay. And
just to set the stage, remember, if y'all came
up the stairs from,
you know, downstairs where you're talking with the bar and you got those
soda pops, and you entered from
a stairwell that's, like, at the northern end of this
room, and it's, like, a long, rectangular
room of which, you know, you're at, like, like the very top and it's longer than it is wide and kind of a little
south of you is where that vat is and then like beyond that is the table where the abrillions were
and where lizzie is with them so we have that in between us and the abrillions we'll say we'll say
that i think the way we had stated it was you had kind of walked in a little bit.
So we'll say you're standing next to the vat.
And what is this place?
Is this like a potion?
The Fly-In Saucer Pub.
It was the place that our friend Quill told us to go check out.
Yes, because he was like, they won't like your kind here in Area 15.
I will take my inspiration dice for remembering a character's name.
Thank you, Gus.
So proud of you.
And the Abrellians are floating, right?
They're like the brains, the floating brains with like tendrils.
Not all of them.
So that's how Quill looked.
Zuzu specifically looked more almost like a beholder,
like a floating eye with eye stalks.
Oh.
Ew.
So then they are kind of levitating.
Yes.
Not all of them.
They can all be a little different.
And so anyway, that's Zuzu.
That's Zuzu.
Yeah, what Quill looks like.
Quill's more like a floating brain.
And these specific Abreliians that you're dealing with here look more like creature from the Black Lagoon
crossed with a, like, 50s sci-fi alien.
Okay.
Like webbed hands?
Yeah, webbed hands, webbed feet, kind of green with long limbs,
like a long, almost pointy head.
Okay.
And lots of nasty teeth.
Hey guys, thanks for that over 70 year old
pop culture reference.
That helped clear some things up for me.
Did you have to look at how long of a reference that was?
Three of them are going to go in initiative order
before Chip.
And believe it or not, they all advance on Chip.
Wow.
Oh no!
Okay, so the first one,
Lizzie's kind of ordered them to attack.
So yeah, well, the first one we will say
closes the distance, like I said, with Chip here
and it moves in an unusual way, even though it's bipedal,
it like kind of clambers on all four
and very quickly is able to close the distance between you.
And with one of its arms lashes out at you, Chip.
Ah, gee.
Hitting AC, that's a 14.
Ooh, just made it.
Oh, you got me.
Oh no.
If it's equal to your AC, it does hit, right?
Correct.
Correct.
That's like the target number you want to hit.
God.
I'm just saying that for anybody who didn't know that.
Not for me.
No, I appreciate that.
I'd give you another initiative die if I could,
but you've already got one.
Inspiration die.
What did I say?
Initiative.
I say initiative?
Inspiration.
It hits you, Chip, for two points of damage.
Is this initiative? Inspiration.
It hits you, Chip, for two points of damage.
Oh!
And it wraps its tentacle around you, gripping you tight.
Uh-oh. Watch out.
I'm a bit of a hugger, too.
Bring it in, big guy.
Chris liked that.
Chris liked that a lot.
Another one decides to,
I'm going to roll a die here to see who it goes after.
If I hadn't made fun of you for being old,
would you have still made him attack me specifically?
No, I would have rolled randomly.
Shoot.
Also, Barbara made a reference to Phantom of the Opera.
It's been around for quite a bit as well.
She's specifically talking about the one with,
oh, what's his name?
Gerard Butler.
Gerard Butler, yes.
The second one closes the distance.
Maybe it's attracted by Barney's walker.
It closes in on Barney Farney and lashes out as well at him,
hitting AC eight, which I assume is a miss.
Whoopsie daisy. You missed. And the
third one goes after
Mateed, closing the distance,
hitting AC 7,
which I assume is also a miss.
Okay, Blaine.
You're up, then after you is going to be Chris,
then Barbara. So what's Chip Haney
going to do here? Am I in
any sort of encumbrance because
he's hugging me? Yeah, you are currently What are you going to do here? Am I in sort of any sort of encumbrance because these...
You're wrapped.
He's hugging me?
Yeah, you are currently grappled.
Okay.
You can make a check to see if you're able to escape.
Would that count as my action or my movement?
I'll tell you what.
I'll give you a break.
We'll say you can do this and do an action as well.
If you're able to escape, we'll say you can take an action.
All right.
What skill check do I need
to do to get out of this loving embrace
from my newest friend?
You can make a strength check for that.
Oh, alright.
Let's see. Let's see if
Chip's a strong boy or not. Okay.
Here we go. See if all them
push-ups been doing me any favors.
That's a 12. You feel like you nearly
had the upper hand there
or the upper tentacle, as it were.
What if I use an inspiration die?
You can.
Oh, yeah.
All right, we're going to give it another go.
A little rusty here.
Been a few days since I hit the old gym.
And that's a, oh, that's a seven.
That is good on that attempt.
Yeah, you're still being held tightly.
But seven plus 12 is 19, so that's how it works, uh, you're still, uh, being held tightly. But seven plus twelve is nineteen,
so that's how it works, right? That would be good.
Uh, so yeah, you're just being
held super tight. Okay.
Hold me close,
tiny brain.
Uh, so then that's it then,
I guess, unless I can do
replace my action with another strength check?
I would say
the grapple essentially just keeps you from moving.
Since that creature is grappling you and is therefore within melee range,
if you wanted to, you could take a melee attack against it
because it's like right up on you.
But since you are grappled,
I would say you would have disadvantage on the attack.
Okay, well, I'm going to go for the attack with my... It's called an
arm blade rapier. Do you know what that is?
Is that like... I imagine a rapier being like a sword,
but why is it considered an arm blade?
Oh, does it go...
Yeah, does it come out of like a little wrist
thing? Is it an assassin creed style?
That'd be pretty cool. That's what I
imagine, that it's like sheath
in your arm. Oh, you're
hugging him, and then all of a sudden you go.
Have it shoot out.
Relate.
All right, pal.
I hate to do this, but I'm going to have to stab you in the throat if you won't let me go.
So I'm going to go for that attack.
Disadvantage.
Oh, I know I didn't make this one.
That's a darn shame.
That's a nine.
Oh, that's a six.
And a six.
Shucks. Nine's a nine. Oh, that's a six. And a six. Shucks. Nine
and a six. Even without
disadvantage, neither of those would
have been good. I don't
make that, do I?
No, no. A six, believe it
or not, does not hit. All right. I call it to the team.
Guys, I'm really letting y'all down.
I just want you to know, very
sorry. Oh, this is the poor
performance. I'm a little rusty. It's been, I've been out of the game for a, very sorry. Oh, this is poor performance.
I'm a little rusty.
It's been, I've been out of the game for a little too long.
Chris, you are up.
Then after you is Barbara.
How far away is this bat?
It's pretty close.
It's just to the left of where you all are standing.
It had 10 feet to your left.
And is it like, do I need to like climb up to do it or do what?
To do what?
Like on the edge of it.
I think it's enclosed, wouldn't it be?
The top appears to be open, and there are some stairs on the... That's not sanitary.
...that lead up to the top near the northern side of the vat from where you are.
10, 15 feet to get to the stairs to climb up and be able to peer into the top of the vat.
Can I go up to it?
Wait, would that open him up for attack opportunity? Yeah. him up for attack yeah one of them did charge up okay he's bound to determine
to climb these stairs i'm going to roll that attack of opportunity on you 16 does not hit
wow wait 16 doesn't hit you barney got armor yeah bar Yeah. Barney's strong as an ox. Okay, so yeah.
As you disengage
and try to walk away from
the Abrilian that's accosting you,
it lashes out at you, but
misses, fails to connect.
I forgot Barney's a cleric. Clerics have armor.
Yeah, so I want to go up to the
edge, right where the thing is.
Listen here,
young men and women
or whoever.
You better calm yourself down
or I'm going to be hopping in your stew.
Don't be a hero, Bernie.
Don't do it. I'll be hopping in your stew
and you're going to ruin your stew.
It's soda pop, to be clear.
You know, I kind of think it might be fun
to watch to see what happens.
Maybe his old man skin melt off with him in this.
Barney, you got a heck of a lot of armor on there, pal.
Are you going to be able to swim?
No.
Okay.
We don't mean, you know, no, no, no, no harm.
Everyone just calm down and stop fighting.
It's a persuasion.
Yeah, before we get to that, just as a point of clarification, And we just everyone just calm down and stop. Stop fighting. It's a persuasion. Yeah.
Before we get to that, just for as a point of clarification, I don't think I said this in the last episode, but on the menu you and just so the listeners know as well, it's spelled soda pop P-A-W-P.
It's not P-O-P.
Before you roll that persuasion check, I'd like for you to roll me a perception check if you could.
Okay.
Bubbling acid.
21.
You see that there is a lot of like things floating in the soda pop,
even though, you know, it's a drink and it was a beverage that was served downstairs.
It's a little chunky.
Maybe you are right to call it a stew.
And you also feel like you hear something that catches your attention
from the northeastern corner of the room, like a scuttling sound of some kind.
When you say chunky, can I discern what type of chunks or what they may be?
You know, I know you rolled a really good perception check,
but you've never seen anything like it.
It's just weird chunks.
The way I think of it, the way I visualize it is almost like,
you know, how you can get sometimes fruit inside of a jello,
you know, like little chunks of fruit that are just like floating in it.
It's kind of like that where it's like,
oh, there's weird little textured chunky things.
Not saying that it's fruit in there.
I'm just saying that's what it makes me think of.
You might want to see if it's like animals, if it's paw.
I don't know if it might be like.
What if it's P-O-O-P?
It's not.
I think that's what Elka thinks based on her wisdom roller.
Okay.
So you've given your speech.
I give my...
Oh, yeah.
And make your persuasion roll now.
Okay.
14.
Should I do better?
I'll use my inspiration die.
Why'd you spin that?
Yeah. I don't know. Barney sounds different. Why'd you scream that? Yeah.
I don't know.
Barney sounds different.
It's worse.
It's 11.
That is two die used up for bad times.
Burned.
Okay, yeah.
Does the 14 do anything?
Yeah, the Abrilians look at each other
and all three of them look back at Lizzie
who scowls at them.
And it seems like they're kind of,
it seems like they're kind of stuck.
Like they're kind of holding back a little bit
and not, they don't have as aggressive of a stance.
And we'll say they let you go, Chip.
The one that's constricting you lets you go.
Okay.
I give him a pat on the back and be like,
that was a good hug.
Thank you for that.
I miss my wife.
He growls at you.
Not that, not that familiar.
And I go.
Are we out of
initiative?
I have a question.
You said I heard something in the northeast
of the room? Yeah. Which is where we came
from was the north side.
Correct. Like a scuttle? Like a mouse
scuttle? Yeah. Or like a
something maybe a little bigger than
mouse. Yeah. Like the seagull from
Little Mermaid. Or a cat.
I got Barbara on that one.
I got Barbara.
You did.
Oh, yeah.
Don't forget, you have a cat.
And I'll just, I'll say, okay, let's just talk this down and I'll get down.
And then I kind of stay there.
And then I ready, in case anyone makes any sudden movements a uh a guiding bolt so you get
a cast guiding bolt if there's any sudden movement if anyone yeah makes moves to attack okay well
let's keep going down the the list here barbara this is all just happened uh what do you think
elga would do at this point i guess like if lizzie told all of her people to, people, I use the term people lightly,
to stand down, are we,
do they still look like they're fighting us? Lizzie didn't say stand down.
No, Lizzie did not tell them to stand down.
She just scowled at them.
Oh, but they did stand down.
Didn't they like back off Chip?
Yeah.
My new buddy stopped hugging me.
They let go of Chip and they're kind of,
it seems like there's some indecision
on behalf of these three Abrelians that are, uh, accosting your friends.
Okay.
Where am I right now in relation to Barney?
He's up on the vat.
Yeah.
You are where Mateed and Chip are just next to the vat.
Maybe 10, 15 feet away from the stairs where Barney went up to get to the top of the vat.
Could I try, I don't know if this will be an action or not, taking some of the soda pop
and splashing it on one of the Abrilians? Sure. So you want to like walk up there to where
Barney is to the top of the vat and then splash it down? Yeah. Yeah. I'll say you can do it as a
bonus action. Like you do, oh, you will take movement to get up there. I don't like it when
you mess with my friends. And so, you know, maybe it's time to cool down.
And then that's when she proceeds to splash it.
Did you hear that, Chip? You're friends with Elga.
Oh.
Oh, dear.
I don't know how to react.
We'll spill a lot more.
But I'll also be in it.
Barney, it's okay.
You shush.
Yeah, we'll spill blood.
No, Chip. Shush. Chip. Let Elga. Yeah, we'll spill blood. No, shush, shush.
Let Elga do the talking right now.
Okey dokey.
I don't want you ruining this for me.
Okay.
You go up there and, you know,
climb to the top of the stairs next to Barney
and splash some of the soda pop out
in the direction of the Abrelion.
And, you know, they look at it.
You're not able to read, you know, they're, like I said, 10, 15 feet away.
You're not able to splash all the way to them.
But, you know, you splash it in their direction and they just kind of,
it was a confused look, look down at it and look at you
standing up at the top of the vat.
Okay.
So it didn't do anything to them.
It didn't like hurt them at all.
No, no.
Nothing.
It didn't reach all the way to them,
but it doesn't seem like they're concerned about it. Like they're're afraid of it and i'm guessing it didn't do anything to me either
when i like no you just stuck your hand in it no okay it's the equivalent of taking a sonic ocean
water and splashing it on the person that served it to you i was gonna say like a mountain dew
baja blast or something even better chunks with chunks just the way I like it. Thank you, Taco Bell. Chunky Mountain Dew.
Chunky Mountain Dew.
Okay.
I guess I'm up there now with Barney.
And as a bonus action, could I rage?
Yeah.
Against the machine?
Yeah.
I'm so mad that that did nothing and my plan didn't work that I just get really angry.
Yeah.
You don't roll anything for that, right?
You just like rage?
It's just, yeah, like something I have to
for long rest. So do you have to
attack to maintain that? I don't
believe so. It's a bonus action to enter
rage for a minute, which is 10 rounds.
I have advantage on strength checks
and saving throws, but not attacks.
I get plus two melee damage with strength
weapons, resistance to bludgeoning,
piercing, and slashing damage.
And I can't cast or concentrate on spells while raging.
Also, just a quick note to John's point.
Your rage ends early if you're knocked unconscious or if your turn ends and you haven't attacked a hostile creature since your last turn or taken damage since then.
Okay.
So, yeah, if you don't attack or take damage, then your rage is over.
Got it.
Next turn. First battle as a barbar damage, then your rage is over. Got it. Yeah, this is... Next turn.
First battle as a barbarian,
so I'll learn it. And then the attack
procs it as well. Like taking
damage, it procs it as well. Come and
get it, little slimy creatures.
Oh, and roll
me, Elga, since
you're standing up there precariously on the edge
of the vat, getting really angry.
Make me a dexterity check.
Oh no. Eleven?
Yeah, you get, you know, really angry,
like shaking angrily and
screaming at everyone, and
the copper cup with the
silver filigree drops out of your
bag into the vat of soda pop.
Does anything happen
to it? No, it just like bobs
in the soda pop for a second and then slowly starts sinking down. As this happens, it's Lizzie's turn now, and after? No, it just like bobs in the soda pop for a second
and then slowly starts sinking down.
As this happens, it's Lizzie's turn now.
And after Lizzie, it's Matide.
Lizzie's eyes narrow.
Lizzie's going to very quickly close the distance
and make a beeline for Elga.
But in order to get there,
she's going to take an attack of opportunity
from Chip and Matide.
If each of you wants to take one as Lizzie barrels past you.
A hundred percent.
Yeah.
Wait, is she attacking though?
She's like charging, moving in an aggressive manner.
Yeah.
Through their space.
Yeah.
I'll take a little swipe.
Do we want to attack or do we want to like, do we also want to do a combat hug?
Like the guy did on me.
Like try to grapple Lizzie?
Yeah, I don't know.
You do what you do, Barney.
I'm going to do what Mateed does.
My name is Chip.
Oh, Chip.
If Mateed's just going to do a standard attack,
let's do that one first
and then we'll deal with the grapple from Barney.
I'm from Chip, if that's okay with you.
You said Barney, so it got stuck in my head.
I will take my inspiration dice.
Thank you.
I will attack and roll the nat 20, so 25.
Believe it or not, that hits.
Damages, seven.
Plus the bonus.
Yeah, we're going to boost that.
Your talents normally do...
D4 plus three.
Yeah, they do D4 plus three.
So we're going to take the first D4 that rolled
and that second one,
we're going to change it from a three to a four.
So we're going to do...
You actually did eight points of damage.
Nice.
Chip, did you want to do like a normal attack or grapple?
How do you want to approach this?
Oh, what the heck?
I'm going to stab her.
Let's do it.
Yeah.
I'm going to go for the old arm blade.
To paint the picture a little bit, Matisse's movements are very fluid.
It's very like as Lizzie goes by, just a swipe of the talons.
They're like the most graceful thing ever, being a monk, a ghost, and a bird.
It's like the most like...
Yeah.
Meanwhile, Chip's gonna hunker down a little, and then he's gonna pop his blade out.
He's gonna jump on her and try to give her a couple of stabs.
Here we go.
Let's get it going.
And that's a seven.
Good God.
That's a miss.
Do I get any advantage because she's passing me or anything?
No, no.
You just get the attack of opportunity.
Shoot.
Yeah, so Lizzie, you know, takes the Talon attack from Matide.
Then maybe she's expecting Chip's follow-up attack,
and she pulls like a Matrix-style dodge and leans back
in a kind of unnatural way to dodge your lunch with the rapier.
Well, after the total whiff, Chip says,
Guys, I promise I'm going to get better at this.
This is a real rough show.
It seems you might be having some difficulties, Chip.
I've been out of the game for a bit.
I'm still working on it.
A little rusty.
Pleasantries, my pungent pals.
With all the nail-biting narrations,
unpredictable plot twists,
and suspicious suspects,
questions are bound to bake your noodle.
Perhaps it's a query for the caster crew? Well, say no more. Questions are bound to bake your noodle. Perhaps it's a query for the caster crew.
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We invite you to post your question on Twitter or Instagram
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And who knows, your question might end up on the show.
We got a brand new Stinky Dragon YouTube.
Go over to YouTube, search for Tales from the Stinky Dragon.
We're uploading all the campaign too,
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Give it a subscribe.
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Go follow us at Stinky Dragon Pod.
We're on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube.
Plus if you post on social media
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Hey, everyone. I want to take a moment to remind you RTX 2023 is happening this July 7th through
July 9th. RTX is our favorite time of the year where
we get to interact with
all of the amazing
people that give us
the opportunity to
make content.
It's a celebration of
all things Rooster Teeth
with panels, special
guests, community
artists, cosplay, and
more.
The big exclusive
reveals, meet and
greets with Rooster
Teeth talent, special
merch available only
during the event.
This year we're kind
of changing up how
the convention feels.
It's going to be
awesome.
It's like a mini
Epcot style convention
show floor with
different attractions and activations
from your favorite Roost Teeth brands, all
wrapped up in a summer camp theme.
It's like summer camp, you know, for kids who
like to stay indoors. It's got face jams
right in Grackle Pub, a Red Web escape room,
a bleep face museum, Achievement
Hunter mini golf, and on top of that, we
also have tabletop RPG
plans with a live show for Tales
from Stinky Dragon,
Must Be Dice, Dungeons and Daddies.
Who knows?
Maybe the groups will see each other around the event.
Possibly.
Hint, hint.
Wink, wink.
So thanks for listening.
Get excited about RTX.
We're looking forward to meeting all of you there. Head over to rtxaustin.com to get more information about the event and buy your badge.
It's time for Dolls, Drama, and death in Barbie Didn't Do It,
a six-episode true crime parody role-playing event from the hilarious cast over at Must Be Dice.
Barbie's on the run, accused of murdering her new boyfriend Kenneth in cold blood.
Now, her best friends Georgette and Candy must don their detective hats
and help clear Barbie's name before the real killer strikes again.
This might mean tracking down and investigating Barbie's ex-boyfriends,
the Kens, who know more than they let on.
Kind of.
Barbie Didn't Do It premieres June 27th,
so subscribe to the Must Be Dice podcast feed to listen,
or watch the full video versions on youtube.com slash at funhouse too and make
sure you head to roosterteeth.com and become a first member to watch episodes early and get
access to the exclusive barbie didn't do it post show barbie's fate depends on it
Rather than go up the stairs like you did,
like Barney and Elga did,
Lizzie approaches the vat and climbs straight up the side of the vat,
balances on the ledge,
and attempts to shove Elga into the vat of soda pop.
Oh, my God. This is like the final fight in Wolverine Origins
when they're at the top and it's Deadpool
versus Wolverine. That's what
it's like, right? The best Deadpool appearance
ever where he has no mouth, right? There's been others?
I don't know
if already that spell,
when would it cast? Oh,
you could at this point, yeah. Lizzie's
obviously coming in with an intention to
attack or hurt a friend of yours. I do have advantage
on strength checks, though,
which I imagine if she's trying to grapple me, that would.
Yeah, since she's trying to shove you,
I think you'll have your option for strength or dexterity,
but let's get Barney's Guiding Bolt, and then we'll make that check.
Yeah, so Guiding Bolt, Flash of Light,
Strengths toward a creature of my choice within range.
That's an 18.
That hits.
And I say, well, I reached.
I tried to board you, little missy.
Yeah, that's right.
This is Elga's house.
It is?
And so that does 17 points of damage.
Oh, that's so much damage.
That's a lot.
It's making up for all the chips misses.
Dude, come on.
I was just like, I miss being so strong.
The little baby weakling rogue.
Oh, yeah.
Lizzie almost loses her footing a little bit.
You know, it's obvious that's a tremendous amount of damage for her,
but she is still standing.
And, you know, with the momentum, she tries to make a shove at Elga.
And Elga, you can either make a strength or dexterity check.
Like, if you want to, like, strength would be like,
you want to brace yourself against getting pushed. Dexterity would be like, you want to brace yourself against getting pushed,
and dexterity would be like,
you want to kind of like try to dodge out of the way.
I'm gonna do strength.
Okay.
I'll let you roll first and then I'll roll mine.
And because I'm raging, I have advantage.
So I just do two of those?
Yep.
Okay. So it's 21 for the first one and 15.
So 21.
21. Okay.
I have a plus three on this.
So let's roll mine. Not a chance. 21. Okay. I have a plus three on this. So let's roll mine.
Not a chance.
14.
So yeah, Lizzie runs up and tries to shove you,
but you just like, you saw her coming.
You knew what was going to happen.
You like, Elga just kind of digs her feet in
and, you know, catches Lizzie's shove
and just like, you know, stops her dead in her tracks
right in front of you.
You get out of here.
Out of your pub.
Yes.
My personal space.
You're my pub.
Mateed.
Yeah.
Then after Mateed, we go back to the top and it's the Abrelion.
That's right. I haven't even taken a turn.
Oh, yeah.
Mateed would see that Chip is having a hard time with his Abrelion
and would ignore that completely and go for one of the other Abralions.
Okay, so that would be, you have two other options.
Probably the one that tried to attack you, I presume?
Actually, no.
Actually, I think I forget that I can do things like,
could Mateed fly up and attack Lizzie?
Sure, why not?
Okay.
I think you might suffer an attack of opportunity
because there is one who tried to attack you
who's in melee range.
Oh.
I thought they, but they backed up.
They kind of stopped for a second.
Like, as if there was a,
metagame-wise, it's like a decision to be made,
whether or not to listen to you or to listen to Lizzie.
Okay.
Then if there's one in my close proximity,
I'll attack that fool.
Okay, go for it. Thank you for reminding
me of my proximity. Yeah, we're gonna do
another Talon Strike. That's gonna be
a 20, 15 plus 5. Nice.
That hits. Good rolls.
I'm gonna...
For everybody. Great rolls.
Every single one of us. Chip, did you
see that?
No, I'm too busy trying to get my ding
arm wrist thing
to work. Ding dang
arm wrist thing. It's not popping out. I swear
this never happens. Six damage
for that one, and I'm going to take
another attack. I have
and when you use an action
attack action with an unarmed strike or
a monk weapon on your turn, you can make one unarmed
strike as a bonus action. Ooh.
That's some monk fun.
Gonna do that again. That one's only 13,
so might miss. That hits.
Okay. That one's only four damage.
So ten total. Okay.
So yeah, you take a couple of swipes with
your talons at the abrellion
that's in front of you. Doing a good amount of damage.
Ten points is really good. Is there anything
else you can do or anything else you want to do?
Nope. That would be it.
Okay.
So that's your turn.
Go back to the top to the Abrellians.
And at this point, you all hear a voice.
Stop.
Stop.
Please stop fighting.
I'm trying to.
It appears to be coming from the northeast corner of the room.
Zuzu Top reveals himself.
He was hiding away behind some barrels and crates in that corner of the room.
And he says, please leave Lizzie
alone. She's hurt. Can't you
see? Well, she tried to hurt
us. Yeah. It's not fair.
Just come down.
Everyone put your weapons
away. There's no need for this.
I talk to the brilliant
that's next to me and I say, oh, you got
lucky this time, pal.
Oh, you were gonna get it.
Elga looks at Lizzie and does the
pointing at the eyes and then pointing
at her and then slitting the throat
motion.
Elga's a little unhinged. She's
raging. Oh, right.
What do you want?
I go down to meet him and say, hi, I'm
Barney, nice to meet you. Uh,
we have met before. Thank you, though.
I like this, though, is that Zuzu's like, what do
you want? Barney's upstairs
with a walker and so has to awkwardly
come down the stairs, so we're all just waiting as Barney
comes down the stairs.
Just silence in the room and this is Barney.
Hi. We met, I believe,
on stage when the Wolfman was killed.
Oh.
I'll approach Zuzu and say, hey there, Zuzu.
So we got a bit of a misunderstanding on our hands.
We got framed for murder.
The Wolfman died.
And they think we did it.
We got locked up.
So we're trying to get to the bottom of this.
Oh, I'm absolutely on your side.
I want to help any way I can.
When the Wolfman was killed, of course they would come after Abrilians.
They're going to think that we're involved somehow.
So I'm just as eager to find the true culprits as you are.
Why would they be so suspicious of your people?
Ordies look down on us Abrilians.
They think of us as second-class citizens.
We're very much discriminated against here in Atro City.
Ah, classic case of xenophobia.
I know the feeling.
I'm like a fifth class citizen here.
Oh, surely you know what we're talking about then.
I do.
But you know, Zuzu, you were on stage when all this happened
and you must have seen something or have some clue as to who might be responsible.
Yeah, I don't know. It was so confusing. It all happened so quickly. I was facing away,
I was performing my magic with you guys. Not even looking in that direction when it happened. It
just makes no sense. I have no hostility towards the Wolfman, like most Abrelians. She took great
lengths to make space for us here in Atro City and fought for our rights.
Now with Wolfman gone,
who knows what'll happen to us.
Do you happen to know who might take
control of Atro City
now that Wolfman is gone?
Oh, this is unprecedented. I assume
there's no plan in place. This was unforeseen
entirely. So maybe it's
more unprecedented, because there's
no one to lead. Am I right?
Guys?
Thank you, Barney.
Maybe you should perform at the next parade.
That's not a bad idea.
And just a quick
question because you are a magician. Do you think
my father used to do the got your nose
trick to me? Can you do it to me too?
That's the highest order of magic.
I can attempt it. Zuzu seems to their eye and uh focus for a bit uh and then makes a uh an illusionary version
of your nose uh float in front of them oh got your nose and then elga goes to reach on her face to
see if it's still there deeper creeper she's got his nose. No, I think this guy is innocent. I think he did nothing wrong.
He stole your nose.
That's what I'm trying to say.
Only a few days ago, Wolfman came here to Area 15 looking for an entertainer for the peace parade.
She came across my name and offered me this job.
I was super reluctant, but she reassured me that she would vouch for me and protect me
as it would be a good way to see that Abrilians are like everyone else.
So, of course, I had to accept.
Were you aware of any of Wolfman's enemies or have you had any kerfuffles with anybody that might not like you?
Kerfuffles? Well, nobody likes Abrilians.
Oh, I like I like you just fine.
That's right. Me and Barney like you just fine.
Thank you.
Thank you.
But I mean, I'm like saying like targeted, you know, like, I don't know, real meanie
weenies.
Was there anybody who would have wanted to do this to the wolfman that you have any prior
knowledge of?
Maybe something that could be a source of ill will, or these feelings could be the arrival of
Abraleon's natural city, caused quite a stir in some religious communities.
This led to a great debate between two religious sects.
Which ones?
The Mormons, who practice Mormonism, and the Popists, who practice Popatism.
Ah.
Abraleons have a hazy memory before our arrival here in Groteth Our arrival was very sudden at the hands of the Great Paw
We believe the Great Paw is testing us
To see how many we can win to our cause away from Mommins
One day we hope the Great Paw will return to collect us
And of course the Mommins are not fond of that
Sounds like the Mommins versus the Pappas
Classic tale
Is that what the Pappas is from. Is that what the soda pop is from?
Is it spelled the same way?
Yes.
I would imagine ma might be spelled the same way too.
M-A-W.
In fact, soda pop is one of the only relics
we have found of our history and where we came from.
One of the elderly Abrilians found a recipe
for this drink amongst their belongings.
And it's a cultural delicacy for us.
So where the heck did you come from? You came up from, in their stars, or?
The Great Paw placed us here, but we don't know from where.
How long ago was that?
So it was in the year 1215 that the Great Paw in the sky brought 15 Abrilians here to Atro City.
So the number 15 is very important to us
and why we live here in Area 15.
Ah.
What's the year we're in?
Yeah, what year are we in?
Just out of curiosity.
I'm just asking Gus.
I don't need to ask this guy.
It was 15 years ago.
You're currently in 1230.
Oh.
Okay, 1230.
Ah.
I don't know how I got here either.
So you're saying that your deity brought you here to this area that you were not in before?
Yes.
As far as we know, we believe that is correct.
These momists, do they have a place of operations that is around here somewhere?
Oh, they're everywhere.
Most residents of Atro City identify as a mawman. What do
mawmisms believe?
They follow the Great Maw, which we don't
really pay attention to. It's not really
our thing. Yes, that sounds very absurd
compared to a giant paw. The true
zealots live far away.
I do have a question. When
the Wolfman came to ask you
to perform at her parade, which
again, very great honor.
Was she with anybody?
Did she have any accompaniments?
It's funny you mention that.
The Wolfman was here with her assistant.
He was a young man dressed in a tweed vest.
Was it gray by any chance?
Is it gray, dude?
No, it was not gray.
However, he did not seem to think that hiring me was a good idea
and was trying to convince the Wolfman to not have an abralion perform.
However, the Wolfman, of course, would not hear of it.
And it made the man so angry, he slammed his fist on the table and stormed out of the pub.
He had a weird name.
What was it?
My goodness.
Do you remember?
Hummingdinger? Hoffman?
Himbo?
I don't remember but I can show you the table we sat at
If you like
Yeah let's see this here fist print
Maybe we can find clues
Is that how we're doing this?
Maybe you left the blood
And then I don't know we can do something
We can take it to the lab
Let's check the table You said there might be blood and then, I don't know, we can do something. We can take it to the lab.
Let's check the table.
That would be great.
Yeah, you said there might be blood and Elga seemed to have perked up there.
Yes, we should definitely inspect this area very post-haste.
She's drooling a little bit.
You follow Zuzu back downstairs into the gloomy pub.
He leads you to a vacant picnic table by a can.
All of you roll an investigation check.
Nat 20.
Ooh, look at you.
10, 18.
I got a nat 20, but I have a negative one, so it was a 19.
Lots of good rolls here.
We'll start from the lower and go up to the higher. Chris, you're continuing the gum-gum tradition of bad investigation rolls,
or let's say low
investigation rolls. Barney
tries to examine the table, and
you find Zuzu's words to be true.
In one corner of the table is a rather distinct
dent in the wood, roughly the size
of a fist. It looks like a very
solid table. It's a good
table. Chip and
Elga, something catches your eye
buried in the fist- fish shaped dent something that's
twinkling blue uh and matide maybe you can't like squeeze in because everyone else is examining
but you take a step back from the table and notice something shiny on the ground near the table's leg
so there's something shiny in the fist print on the table and on the leg there's something shiny
uh that's twinkling blue in the dent and then there's something shiny, the twinkling blue in the dent. And then there's something shiny on the ground near the table's legs.
Look at the craftsmanship.
Is that oak?
Is that walnut?
It looks really good.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Stained it and everything.
Looks great.
Can we maybe ask Zuzu if he knows what the shiny blue thing is in the dent?
Yeah.
Do you know where this table, where they got it?
Elka, please ask what you want to ask.
Excuse me, Mr. Zuzu.
I think I noticed something here on the table
where a man in tweed vest slammed his fist in anger.
There seems to be a little blue,
something shiny blue here.
Do you see?
Huh.
Zuzu, you know, reaches out and picks at it, and it comes up.
It's like a small, translucent white gemstone that has a pale blue glow about it.
Zuzu looks it over and says,
Hmm, it appears to be a moonstone of some kind.
Elga, why don't you make me an intelligence check?
That's no good for me.
You can evolve a Kaffir if you find one.
Oh, the who are you again? I don't know. You can evolve a Kaffir if you find one. Who are you again?
I don't know.
You rolled a three.
It's pretty.
You think it might be worth a little bit of money?
Can Chip ask, like, what's the significance of a moonstone?
Oh, it could be used in jewelry, maybe.
Chip, why don't you make me an intelligence check?
Ah, 16.
You think that this was probably a gemstone from a ring.
Maybe it fell out.
And Elga, as you take a look closer,
you notice that it has two letters engraved in it.
In the stone.
Yeah, in the stone.
L-C.
L-C?
L-C.
Someone damaged their Super Bowl ring.
Darn shame.
I wonder if this belonged to a corporation
and the first L is not shown.
That's nice.
Since Matit is back from Irby,
can Matit check what's on the ground?
Yeah.
You take a look near the leg of the table here
and you find a small gold ring
hidden beneath the table near the legs.
It's scuffed up a bit,
and it's missing its jewel inset.
And there's an inscription inside of the ring
that says Hamlord.
Hamlord?
Yeah.
LC Hamlord.
So this is from,
we think it's from the same ring.
Is there an LC?
It does, yeah.
Could be.
I have found this ring.
Does that stone fit in it?
Let me try.
Let's try.
Yeah, you try to put them together
and it seems like they do fit together.
He punched the table so hard,
his ring both broke and then fell off his finger.
He must have been very angry.
Very angry.
Matit, make me a history check, please.
What did it say again? Ham? Ham Lord. Ham Lord. Mateed, make me a history check, please. What did it say again?
Ham?
Ham Lord.
Ham Lord.
Like Lord of the Ham?
19.
Yes, like Lord of the Ham.
Mateed, you know that moonstones are found in the Lofton Borough of Atro City near the college.
Lofton Borough?
Yeah.
Or you could say the Borough of Lofton.
Hmm.
Okay. Moonstones are found in the what do i know about the lofton borough you know the lofton borough is very hoity-toity can i say that is that allowed on this family
podcast sure is that a swear word somewhere you come from which, the hoity or the toity?
It's very uptight and very upstanding part of the city.
And you also know that there's a college there.
Okay.
You know, if we held this here moonstone up to a clefairy,
I think it would evolve into a clefable.
So if this is assistant of... Nothing.
Nothing.
Hey, get out of here.
I smiled.
I'm laughing because I made that joke a minute ago and no one heard it.
So this assistant did not want you to be hired.
Was there anything else you could describe about this person that we might be looking for now?
To invest...
What else?
A name.
Well, it had a sort of name.
Like it was a Hasselhofer.
Himbo.
Hamlord.
Oh, was it Hamlord?
Was that the name you were looking for?
Oh, Hamlord.
That was it.
Oh, okay.
Bingo.
Ring-a-ding-ding.
Also, there was something else, actually.
I think he left his jacket here.
Oh. This guy's just dropping everything. Oh, man. actually. I think he left his jacket here. Oh.
This guy's just dropping everything.
Oh, man.
Was he naked as he left?
He stormed out, and he was so angry.
I believe he left his cloak at the door.
I'm curious, what exactly, at what point did he become that angry at the situation?
Was there something said?
When the wolfman would not listen to him about hiring a brilliant to perform at the Peace Parade.
Yeah, it's when they asked him
to perform. I just don't know if there was like a
specific... He just seemed to be
very upset about not being
listened to for this. Can I go
investigate the cloak? Could Barney
go with him? Yeah, it's
still hanging on a coat rack by the door.
It's made from a fine blue
chambray fabric with a pin attached to the breast.
And it's got a little inscription on it.
What does it say?
The inscription on the pin attached to the breast reads LC.
We got another LC over here.
A-Zoo-Zoo.
L-Z is the ring of bell?
A-Zoo-Zoo.
A-Zoo-Zoo.
And so the LC was on the gem itself, not the ring.
Yeah.
Correct.
In this little.
In the pin.
Correct.
The ring said Hamlord.
Can't say I know that.
Lieutenant Commander.
That'd be a very convenient name for a lieutenant to have.
Lego City.
It's a really nice looking blanket.
I feel, though, that we should follow up on this new leads that we have of this Amlord,
who was not happy about the Zootop inclusion.
Translation, we need to find Hamlord because he was not happy.
Do we need to translate?lord because he was not happy. Do we need to translate?
Yeah, I'm the interpreter.
I'm just helping.
Mateed kind of confusingly looks at Chip and doesn't understand why he did that.
Hey, happy to help.
I know this might seem like a weird question,
but when this individual was wearing the jacket,
did it seem to fit them properly like it was their jacket?
Yeah, it didn't seem out of place. It seemed to be his cloak.
I'm just trying to figure out because, you know, if we have Hamlord and LC, those do not line up in terms of the right letters lining up.
So I'm trying to decide if this individual's name is Hamlord or if it's LC.
That is puzzling.
It might be, like, associated with, like, where they work, where they're from.
Or their rank or something.
Or, yeah.
Wait, what's the, wait, hey.
What is the name of the school in the Loftinboro?
Why, Loftin College, of course.
There it is.
There it is.
Loftinburg. Why, Loftin College, of course. There it is.
There it is.
Your intelligence is
only matched second to your beauty.
Give yourself an inspiration
die for that one, Matisse. Finally!
And Chip,
roll me an investigation
check. Alright.
Chip Painting, number one
investigator. Just gotta find the
investigation die. There it is.
Hey, that's a 15.
That ain't bad.
That's pretty good.
The cloak feels like it might have something in the pockets.
Uh-oh.
It's got a strange weight to it.
Found something in the pocket.
You guys picked up this cloak and didn't look in the pockets?
Who are you?
Aren't you a professional?
I'm a little rusty.
All right, I pull it out.
What is it?
In one of the pockets, there's a tiny brass key with the letter D etched into it.
Guys, we got another letter.
I feel like we're in an escape room and we're like finding little things.
Like if you find the four other keys, you can open up this box in the room.
So a brass key with a D and then what else?
Yeah.
There's also an envelope addressed to a Mr. Hamlord.
And it appears to be sent from Lofton College.
Okay, and we got a letter addressed to a one Mr. Hamlord.
It's a series.
Hey, guys, I found a series of letters on this piece of paper.
Read them in sequential order, but quickly sometimes.
Interesting.
Left to right, up and down.
Can I read it?
Inside the envelope is a formal letter requesting Hamlord fill in for the Wolfman's teaching post at the college in light of recent events.
And it's signed by the signature on it is illegible.
In light of recent events?
What recent events?
Wolfman dying, I assume?
No, this would have been before.
This would have been before.
Right?
Yeah, I don't know.
Looks like we're on the hunt for a murderous substitute teacher with anger problems.
Because this would have happened before the event.
Right.
Right.
What did Miss Wolf, what did she teach?
Oh, I don't know.
I've never been to Lofton College.
Me neither.
Ah, genies, huh?
Who's the letter signed
by? Illegible. The signature's
illegible. That's a weird name.
There's also a potion
in the cloak. There's a potion?
What more is in this cloak?
Three things?
I'm going to pocket the potion.
I don't know. It's a small
glass vial half filled with a
clear liquid with dark red flecks.
Half filled.
Can I, do I recognize it or anything?
You can make an Arcana check if you want.
Here it comes.
Is it half filled as if someone had some?
Hard to say.
Maybe half empty, right?
If it was just a normal potion, I was going to hold on to it.
But I say we got some mystery liquid.
Anybody recognize what
this is? It looks like someone drank it.
Chip rolled an eight. He rolled an eight, by the way.
I rolled an eight.
I'm a little rusty, guys.
Go for it, Elka. I'm going to take a look.
I shotgun first.
You both can look.
Don't drink it. It's Arcana,
you said? Yeah. I don't know
what it is. It's seven and an eight. It's Arcana, you said? Yeah. I don't know what it is.
Seven and an eight.
It looks so mysterious, though.
Matit, do you want to take a go?
I will take my best shot.
All right.
That's a 19.
Oh.
Thank goodness.
Matit, everyone's just kind of holding it and staring at it dumbly. You recognize it pretty quickly as the remnants of an anti lycanthropy potion.
Which has what properties?
It stops you from turning into a werewolf,
I think. If you have lycanthropy?
Yeah, it removes the
curse of lycanthropy.
Like entirely?
With some asterisks.
But yeah, essentially. Is it like a
medicine that you need to take in order to
stave it off, or is it a one and done?
Right.
It would be like a temporary effect.
Okay.
Okay.
It was Wolfman turned into a werewolf before dying, right?
You did see patches of fur spring out.
But didn't fully form into a werewolf or into a wolf form and died mid something.
Correct.
Is there any other stuff in this code?
No, that's it.
That's all that's in the club.
Quick question.
Is the cat still on my shoulder?
Yeah, you still have the cat.
Okay.
Can I do a check to see if there's any...
One of two things.
Just check in the room for any scraps of meat or any signs of mice in the room.
Make it an...
We'll call it an investigation check.
15.
No. of mice in the room. Make it an investigation check. 15. No, there are no signs of rodents or food.
It seems like the only thing available here
at the Fly and Saucer Pub is soda pop.
Okay.
I'm actually quite curious.
In this soda pop, what is in it?
That is a cherished abrealian recipe.
To share it with you would be to betray my abrealian origins.
May I have a little taste?
You can absolutely have some soda pop if you'd like.
Yum.
Go for it, Barney.
Do I just like.
Yeah, you would get a glass from the bartender.
I think we ordered some earlier.
Yeah, unless I could.
You did.
Yeah.
I could grab that glass that fell into the vat.
Oh, that's like in the vat.
Like it's slowly sank to the bottom.
But yeah, you all did at the end of the last episode, you all did order some and those
would still be on the bar if you want to go back to that.
Drink it. Oh yeah.
Drink it. I'll go back.
Alright, so you, in Chris's
words, you wobble over and
Wobble baby,
wobble baby, wobble baby. Take a drink
of soda pop. Roll me a constitution
saving throw. Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.
He's going to turn into an alien.
18.
It turns your stomach and you feel, or like your intestines and your stomach is turning inside out,
but you keep it down and you have like a very strange feeling inside of you.
Like you're not sure if it made you feel sick or if it made you feel super strong.
Well, that's got to kick.
What did it taste like?
You don't know, Chris.
Don't answer.
If you want to make something up, I'll tell you if it's all right.
I'm sure.
Yeah, you tell me.
It tastes like if you had taken a bar rag at the end of a shift
and wrung it out into a bucket that had been used to mop the floor.
It was not pleasant at all.
Oh, man.
There's some salve that I put on my...
Salve.
Salve, that's what I say.
I put it on my hands sometime when they get sore.
It kind of tastes like that
because I lick my fingers eating some peanuts
and I get my mouth, it tastes like that.
You are very gross, old man.
Horrifying.
Mateet is delighted by Barney's musings.
So I say, all right, Zuzu.
Well, I think we're looking for a substitute teacher that may or may not be a wolf person who has anger problems, who works at the college.
A wolf person who has anger problems who works at the college.
Are you going to go with us to maybe investigate this?
Or like how best do you think we should go about trying to figure out what happened?
Absolutely not.
I need to stay here and hide.
Please keep my whereabouts a secret, especially from the coughs.
But please try to find this Hamlord. I'm sure they can provide guidance as to what happened.
What would be the best way to get to
Loftinboro? Well,
Loftin is the next borough due west of
Area 15 and the college is at the south
end of Loftin. I would recommend
that you sneak over there because you would want to
hide from patrolling cops or any
atrolytes that might recognize you. I got a
question for you. Do you have a disguise
that we could borrow? I'm afraid
not. That's why I've been hiding here myself.
I just have my top hat.
What about the lost and found at the bar?
You can look. Most
Brailiants probably wouldn't have things that
look appropriate on you, but you're more than
welcome to take a look. Barney, I got a
cool cloak if you want it.
Slightly used.
Yeah, okay. That looks...
This is fine craftsmanship on this cook
It sure is look at that
They don't make them like that anymore huh
I drape it over Barney
You look wonderful
What color hair did this tweed fellow
Hamlord have
I don't recall what color hair
He specifically had
Do you remember what kind of creature
Was he a humanoid
What did he look like?
He was an ordi like you.
An ordi. That spans
a spectrum.
A non-Abrelian, I think, is what
the ordi
Is ordi short for ordinary?
Yes, of course!
Okay. It's actually short for ordinance.
That sounds like
cock talk to me.
Get him.
Well, Chip claps his hands together and says,
it looks like we're going to college.
Don't forget, be very careful.
Don't let the coughs catch you, and don't tell them where I am.
Don't tell them where you are.
Don't let the coughs catch us.
What's an atro-lite?
What the heck is that?
A citizen of
Atro City. Oh.
You. Me?
Yeah, you're a citizen.
Zuzu got some bad news for you.
An atro-lite
knows where you live. Mateed
takes this as a moment to step
away and leave. Okay.
Should we disguise ourselves?
I think we may worry about that
when we are actually on our way.
I don't have a disguise.
I don't know if we have access to that, but...
I think maybe we just try to be sneaky.
Yeah, let's skulk our way through the sewers or whatever.
What we'll do is we can have the entire party
make stealth checks as a group check
to see if you're able to successfully,
stealthily make your way from Area 15 over to Lofton.
I'm sure Barney's going to be great with those stealth checks.
Everyone make a stealth check.
24.
My stealth checks are at disadvantage.
Yeah, because you're a cleric wearing chainmail armor.
23 for Mateed.
Five.
We step out.
Immediately, a spotlight hits us.
16.
I do have a cloak.
Don't worry. So,
Elga got a 16,
Matide a 23, and Chip
a 24, and of course Barney a 5.
That's good enough. You're able to
navigate through Atro City,
sneaking your way, and reach the Lofton
Burrow undetected.
Lovely.
Just as an afternoon crescent sun peeks through drizzling gray clouds,
you too peek around a street corner and see a sign that reads Lofton Burrow.
The lettering is ornate, and the sign itself appears to be planted amidst a flowerbed of
blooming wolf's vein.
You follow the sign and see that this part of the city is built atop a hill overlooking the rest.
After a short climb along a cobblestone trail, you finally reach an avenue of posh houses and a few businesses populated by tall folk.
At the far southern end of the road, you spot a prestigious campus with a wrought iron archway that reads Lofton College.
What are tall folk?
Like humans, elves, orcs.
Oh, not elks. Correctgas correct wait no elga's half
love half elf you managed to get half in your race again okay so there's shops and then there's
a college at the end of the way correct do we want to take a chance at going to some of the shops or
do we want to just go and see if we can find like a directory for where the college like what
buildings and offices belong to whom.
What do some of the shops say?
Yeah, what we got?
There's various shops that sell different things.
There's a pub.
There's lodgings.
There are fine clothes establishments.
There's a shop called Stacy's Stones.
And that's about it.
That's all you see right around here.
I think we should probably look at Stacy's stones
if they maybe sell moonstones
and maybe have a record of who they might have sold this to.
No weapons, no weapons, sales, shops, places.
Oh, God, no.
Not in this part of town.
Heavens, no.
Heavens, heavens.
Yeah, Matty notices the stones place
and heads that direction.
Okay.
Stealthily.
Does anyone else follow?
I think Elga, you said you wanted to as well.
Yes, absolutely.
Elga would like to get stoned immediately.
Barney's looking around, smiling.
Barney, we are going this way.
I'll guide Barney by the arm.
Stacey Stones is a modestly built shop
compared to the surrounding buildings,
but it has large spotless windows.
Inside, there's a tall orc named Stacey Fassett
wearing glasses over kind brown eyes
that sometimes shift to hazel.
You walk in and she seems to be focused down
with some scrolls and papers that are in front of her.
It seems to be scribbling.
Stacey, are you the legendary Stacy of Stacy's Stones?
She looks up with a start.
Oh, hello.
Welcome, come in.
Yes, I'm Stacy.
And welcome to Stacy's Stones.
Hi there, Chip Haney.
Pleasure to meet you.
I want to shake her hand.
Yeah, she's still a little startled by you all walking in without her noticing.
But she sticks a hand out for you to shake.
OK.
And there are several display cases around the shop with one main display case at the back of the shop where she was scribbling away.
Can I go up to her and inquire if you by any chance sell a Moonstones in your shop, Stacy?
Oh, yes, absolutely.
She points down at the display case under her,
and there's many gold rings that have moonstones engraved with the letters LC in them.
The whole case is filled with them.
What does LC stand for?
Lofton College.
I'm just double-checking.
These are class rings for Lofton College.
They're my bread and butter.
I sell lots of these.
Is every ring different for every year?
Usually, no. They're pretty standard. People who attend Lofton College like to maintain tradition
and a sense of continuity over the years.
Do you happen to have a record of everyone who's purchased a ring from your shop?
Oh, that would be quite a bit. Seems like just about everyone from Lofton buys a ring because they attend Lofton College.
I might have some records, but it would be pretty extensive.
Are you familiar with maybe some of the faculty that is working at the college?
Yeah, I have passing knowledge of them.
They stop in occasionally or I hear the students talking about them.
Fantastic.
Does the name Amlord ring any bell?
Ugh, Hamlord.
I do not like that man.
I went to Lofton College with him.
He would always cheat off me during our alchemistry test.
Does Amlord work at the college, or is he just a frequenter of this area?
He worked at the college for a while.
He was a teacher's assistant for Professor Wolfman.
Then after he graduated, he got an assistant job with the Wolfman at the parliamentary office.
You know how that is.
It's all about who you know.
It's hard for anyone not in the inner circle to get ahead here.
Oh, yeah.
What did Mrs. Wolfman teach?
Professor Wolfman taught law. here. Oh, yeah. What did Mrs. Wolfman teach? Professor Wolfman taught law.
Law.
Say, this Hamlord, you know,
where's his offices and stuff located?
I think we came across a lost item of his
and we just wanted to make sure
it got back to him safe and sound.
I would imagine his office
is probably at the parliament,
seeing as he works in
the parliamentary offices these days. He may still have an office here at Lofton College,
but I don't know where that would be. I personally haven't stepped foot in Lofton
College for a few years now. Just out of curiosity as well, you know, I imagine you've heard of
Wolfman's unfortunate, untimely passing.
So terrible.
But did anything else happen to her, you know, in recent times other than her death?
Any illnesses or tragedies?
Illnesses or tragedies for the Wolfman?
Not that I'm aware of.
Seemed like everyone loved her.
I don't know of anything that had fallen her recently.
Mr. Ham, is he the only one that didn't care for him or is he not a popular fellow?
I can't answer that for certain. I don't really know the other people who run in his circle.
All I know is that he was a jerk and most people would
probably agree with me, but I can't speak for them. You know, Stacey, I think I'd have to agree
with you. You seem like a trustworthy person. Hey, just out of curiosity, what's your thoughts
on the Abrellians in Area 15? Oh, they're fine. They don't buy my wares, so I don't really have
much interaction with them. They seem okay to me. Is that kind of the general vibe here around
Lofton or? Ugh, in Lofton? Don't get me started on the people here in Lofton. They're a snobby
bunch around here. I think the people of Lofton would most commonly turn their noses up at
Abrellians. Not you, Stacey. You're a real salt of the earth kind of gal, ain't ya? I'm just trying
to make ends meet in this posh part of town, trying to pay back
that crippling student loan debt.
From Lofton College. From Lofton
College, you got it. And I don't
have the connections Hamler does,
apparently. Yeah, what is
your study? I study transmutation
and alchemistry. Well, you don't
say. You guys want to boogie?
I, uh,
Stacey, you seem like you might be very connected to the going and ons of the Lofton area.
Is there a, what is the gossip of what is happening around here right now?
Is there concerns of the community that are of particular interest or importance?
The scuttlebutt!
There it is.
It's just typical, meaningless drivel around here.
The people of Lofton are worried about the other boroughs infringing upon lofton and lowering the value
of their homes it's all very boring real nimby kind i don't know what that means but yeah sounds
about right not in my backyard it's a bit of a problem yeah yeah oh that's them well uh thank you for your time and
we appreciate it stacy we're gonna boogie we appreciate your help we'll hopefully be back
to buy some of your wares down the road sounds good her attention becomes refocused on uh her
papers and what she's working on okay so team i don't think we're as wanted as we figured. I don't think we're like public enemy number one
because Stacy was pretty cool.
No, I mean, we are living in an era
that not necessarily going to be able
to just put our faces up on TVs everywhere.
So, you know, information right now.
Yeah.
Have we seen any like wanted posters with us on them
or anything like that?
Any sort of like thing that indicates that we're being sought after?
Make a, let's say perception check.
14.
16.
Yeah, you saw some wanted posters during your sneaking from Area 15 to Lofton.
How much to turn Chip in?
Hello Lofton. How much to turn Chip in?
Chip, I think
it was a vague
promise of 100 gold for any information
leading to any of you four.
That's good to know.
I have an idea. Chip didn't
do anything to you, bird person.
What if we pretend
to be students at the college?
I think you look...
And we got to get to class.
Yep.
You look...
Law class.
Why don't you pretend to be a professor or the dean?
I somehow think that all of us are just kind of scooting around the different college ages.
You know, some of us too young.
You're never too old to go back to college. You can
do that anytime you want. But you can be too
young to go.
No, you're a
what do you call it? Prodigy.
Yeah, a prodigy. Well, I mean,
tell me something I don't know.
You guys want to scoot down there to the
college and see if we can find like a directory
with Hamlord's office? Yeah, let's head. I also really want to scoot down there to the college and see if we can find like a directory with Hamlord's office?
Yeah, let's head.
Yeah.
I also really want to figure out like what happened.
It said due to recent events.
I'm wondering what happened there.
That note in the pocket.
Yeah.
Oh, oh.
The letter.
It said due to recent events.
Oh, it could be him getting elected.
Or just like someone who placed that.
Her getting elected. Or just like someone who placed that. Her getting elected. Who made that letter as like a
alibi that he
already had access to somehow from somebody.
Yeah, that's mysterious.
That's a good call. Something to keep in mind.
We head to the college. Yeah, we
head to the college. I want to see if we can find like a
map or something. Back to school.
Back to school.
Hope I don't be a fool. Where is
my first class?
I can't remember.
Do you remember your locker combo?
No.
Did you have lockers in college?
No.
Yeah, we had.
What happens, Gus?
Yeah, so you all walk up to the entrance to Lofton College
and there's a wrought iron archway that reads,
Lofton College that leads into a well-gardened courtyard
made of stone tiles.
Leaf trees line the sides of the
courtyard, and a long planter box
filled with blooming wolf's veins sits in the center.
At the far end of the courtyard is
a U-shaped gothic building made of stone.
And it looks like there's two floors
with numerous windows and one main entrance.
Can I, do I know
what their mascot is? Make a
wisdom check
Ooh, that's a five
Yeah, you don't know
The wolf's spain
Can I, can Barney go up and look at that?
That's a flower?
Yeah
Does it have any effect on wolf people?
Like, it's wolf's spain
Does it like hurt wolf's spain or anything? That would be a rough thing to put around the college That's what I was wondering Or do they like it's wolf's bane i and does it like hurt wolf's bane or anything that would be a rough
thing to put around the college that's what i was wondering but or do they like it a lot why
is it called wolf's bane that's a real flower chris yeah that's a real that's a real flower
you really you're really owner would know well i was just thinking you know like grace gum gum the
flower wizard oh man i figured all those times you were googling for different flowers you would
come across
wolf's bane. Make a wisdom
check for me. 22. You don't think
it has anything necessarily to do with
wolves per se,
but you do know that
wolf's bane can be
poisonous if ingested. Barney, don't eat that.
Can I
pick some?
I'm going to
press it in a book.
God, old people are so weird.
Sure, yeah, you walk up to the planter and pick, what, like one or two?
Just a handful, and I'll put them in my alms box to dry,
and I'll give one to Helga.
Here you go.
Would you like a little flower?
You can only give me a flower if you remember my name.
Helga. Hel. Helga.
No H. Drop the H.
Helga. Drop the H.
Helga.
I will save your blood for last.
I shuffle Barney towards that
U-shaped gothic building.
Barney, make a constitution saving throw.
Uh-oh. Is the soda pop coming back?
15.
The wolf's bane left a tingling sensation on your hands.
Oh.
Yeah, so you shove Barney down to the gothic U-shaped building,
and there's a set of wooden double doors
that lead into the first floor corridor of this building.
Does it seem like an administrative kind of building?
It's rather large. I guess, do you open the door and look in this building. Does it seem like an administrative kind of building? It's rather large.
I guess, would you, do you open the door and look in?
Yes, do things.
You open the door and it's a rather large candlelit atrium inside
that splits off three ways, east, west, and south.
And there's wooden signs with arrows floating in midair
that read Great Hall, and that's straight ahead.
West stairs androoms A and B
to the right, East Stairs
and Classrooms C and D to the left.
Are there any directories or any
welcome desk that has anything listed?
I'm just going to quickly point out we have a
key with a D on it.
Hey! Smart.
We're really good at Dungeons
and Dragons. Elga, you're one smart whippersnapper.
One of you is maybe.
That's why we take notes.
Yeah.
Is there anybody in this entryway as we're coming in?
Yeah, there's various students walking around, shuffling around, having conversations.
And the students are, they seem rather young, mostly like teenagers.
Okay.
Yeah. Mateed follows Elga towards towards classroom d because elga thought of it
i guess we remember we have a key that has a d on it so maybe we go to d
i put two and two together we don't want to be late for class
by need your first class is actually in classroom A if you want to head that way.
Oh, is it? Okay.
Okay, so classroom D, if you follow the signs, would actually be at the far end of the hall to the left in what is the southeast corner of the room.
So you make your way down there.
So you see a door labeled classroom D, and around the corner from it are a set of stone steps
leading up to the second floor.
Oh, so like the classroom entrance just goes upstairs?
No, no, I'm trying to clarify.
So there's a door labeled Classroom D,
and then like around the corner from it,
independently, there's a staircase that goes up to a second floor.
Is Classroom D's door solid or have a window into it?
Solid.
I'll tell you what, all four of you make me a perception check.
No.
Six.
17.
Chipped is not your day.
I know.
21.
16.
Elga, maybe because, you know, you're closer to it than your compatriots,
the handle on the door appears to be turning and twitching a little bit.
Like without us touching it?
Correct.
Yeah, like as though someone on the other side of the door is trying to open it?
Could I touch the handle and see if that does anything?
Yeah.
Like you just touch it or do you try to open it?
Or what do you mean you touch it?
Like are you trying to steady the motion or just feel it?
Yeah, like hold on to it.
Yeah, you hold on to it and it's moving ever so slightly.
Like John suggested, like maybe it's being manipulated from the other side.
Could I put my mouth right up on the door crack and go,
Hello, if there is a person on the other side, we are about to come inside and we mean no harm.
I just want to tell you that we are friendly.
Just doing some casual snooping what uh you hear a voice uh
come back through the same crack say uh okay oh god barney you want to get out of here i don't
know about this let's go find that cafeteria do you want to let us in the room? Just open the door on the other side? I can't. I'm stuck.
Can you open the door and let me out?
It just so happens that we can.
Matit puts their hand on the door and goes,
Perhaps we should approach with caution.
We do not know who this person is on the other side.
My name is Henry. Please help.
Why are you locked in the classroom, Henri?
Let me out and I'll tell you.
I just don't know how this is going to work. I'm sorry.
Please. I've been here all morning.
Are you a student?
No.
Why are you in the college stuck in a classroom?
I'll tell you when you let me out.
I don't want to get in any trouble. I'm going you when you let me out. I don't want to get in
any trouble. I'm going to be in so much
trouble. By who, Henry? Who's
going to get you in trouble? My parents.
How old are you, Henry?
I'm eight.
Henry, what are you doing out of college? You're an eight-year-old
boy. Do not
question why young people might be
in the college. Sorry, Elga.
Very precocious young man.
I'll tell you when you let me out.
All right.
Should we do it?
Yeah, let's open it up.
I'm going to run you my arm blade.
Don't worry.
Henry, I don't want to have to stab an eight-year-old today,
so you better not be messing around, okay?
Oh, what?
Any day you got to stab an eight-year-old's a bad day.
Don't worry.
We are, again, very nice, not combative, not evil people.
Right, everybody?
That's right.
Best behavior.
Yes, of course.
Unless Henry decides to mess around, and then he will find out.
Mess around and find out.
Yeah.
Yeah, open the door.
You try to open the door, and it's locked.
Use the...
Can we use the key with the D on it?
I feel like I'm playing, like, a Monkey Island game
where I'm like, all right, use key on door.
Yeah, the key fits neatly into the lock
and unlocks the door, and you're able to open it.
The room appears to be...
It's clearly a storage room full of boxes, desks and benches.
From behind one of the boxes, you see the eyes and the top of a little eight-year-old boy's head sticking over, looking at you all as you enter.
What is he?
Is he like a human?
Yeah, it's a human boy.
He says, hello, I'm Henry.
We know Henry.
We upheld our end of the deal, letting you out.
So what's going on?
Why are you in here?
My dad recently went missing.
So this morning I decided to sneak into the school looking for him
because I think he used to work here.
I was looking around in this room when suddenly a man in a tweed vest
rushed in, so I hid behind some boxes.
I think the man was hiding something in here,
but before I could do anything, he quickly left and locked the door behind him.
I've been trying to pick the lock since this morning. My mom doesn't know I'm here. She
thinks I'm hanging out at a friend's house. But I had to go. I missed my dad. I don't get to see
him that much, as is. I wish we could spend more time together, but he's often working at his new job.
Who's your papa, Henry?
His name's Robert.
Robert. Robert what? What's his last name, Henry?
Um, I don't want to tell you,
because you're going to get me in trouble.
Oh, stranger danger. That's smart, Henry.
You're a smart boy.
Uh, Anri, uh, does your father,
did he, uh, previously work here as a college?
Or why are you here?
He used to work here, but
he got another job and now we don't
spend as much time together.
So you went to your dad's old
place of work to find your dad?
He wasn't at the new place, so
I thought he would be here. I don't know
very many places. What was his
new job that he got i don't
know i don't even know what this place is now henry i want you to take a good long look around
this college okay because it's the last time you'll see it because i don't think you're gonna
make it here but he's an eight-year-old kid he doesn't know but i know he's just, he's not, I don't think he has what it takes.
Could Elga approach the little boy and go, you know, from one child to another.
God.
You know, you're safe with me.
These, all these, you know, older people, they're old and stinky, don't know what they're doing.
So you say your dad worked here, doesn't anymore.
And a man in a tweed vest came in here.
Where did he hide this thing that you said he hid?
He points into the southwest corner of the room.
He was messing around over there.
In a desk or something?
It's like where there's some boxes.
I'm going to go home now before my mom realizes I'm missing.
I don't want her to get mad at me.
Chip will go start opening boxes. I'm going to go home now before my mom realizes I'm missing. I don't want her to get mad at me.
Chip will go start opening boxes.
Maybe we find your dad and send him home to you, okay?
Maybe.
Remember his name's Robert.
Okay, bye.
Can I ruffle his hair?
Yeah, he scowls at you.
He doesn't like that.
He starts walking out towards the front door of the college.
I have to wonder, the kid's been locked up here for a while. There's no bathroom in here, so I don't know what that little boy
was doing, but he had to make business
someplace, so watch your step, I guess.
Did one of you say you were going to go look by
those boxes? Yeah.
I think Chip said he was, yeah.
Matide goes too. Both of you
make an investigation check.
That's a five. That's
a 17.
Oh, Chip, look at you. Decided to show up to play.
You know, this is the best thing.
This is the best thing, is that at any point in any of this
as if Blade would make the choice
just to go with the ribbing,
it actually would probably stop, but because you keep
getting irritated by it, Gus goes,
yes, yes, more,
more. It is so hard to play
Chip who's very nice.
And I'm just dying.
And I think you're doing a great job of it,
Blaine. Thanks.
What's in the backs? You find
some glass vials
that are empty that have a residue
of that same anti-lycanthropy
potion. Oh, so they're not empty.
Residue. Yeah, there's residue.
Yeah. Okay. Is there a way
to check for like little trap doors
or secret switches or something?
Yeah, make an investigation
check. Fifteen. You
search around the room
and you don't find any
secret switches or trap doors
or hidden rooms or anything.
Can I try something?
Barney, can I have one of them wolfbane flowers?
Oh, yeah.
I just need the one.
Here you go.
Can I like sprinkle a little bit of the anti-lycanthropy stuff on the flower just to like see if it's like got poisonous things?
Because I'm here.
I'm wondering if this isn't some sort of poison and maybe a hamlord poisoned wolfman.
Sure, but you need to make me a constitution saving throw first.
You touched it.
I know I'm touching the glass that's touching the poison.
You touched the wolf's mane.
The wolf's mane is the poison.
Son of a gun, you're right.
Oh, constitution.
You would think Chip would have like rubber gloves
or something like that.
18.
It makes your hands tingle quite a bit when you touch the wolf's mane, but nothing something like that. 18. It makes your hands tingle quite a bit
when you touch the wolf's bane,
but nothing other than that.
I'm going to wash my hands before I take a pee-pee later.
Could I do a quick investigation
to see if there's any other, like,
like a desk with a locked drawer
or like a locker or a cabinet or something?
Yes, let me answer Chip's question real fast
and then I'll get to that.
So you tried to sprinkle the wolf's bane
onto the vial?
No, so I tried to put the
anti-lycanthropy stuff
onto the wolf's bane flower to see if
it like kills it instantly or has like
poison acid.
It makes it shimmer a little bit.
Okay. Alright.
I wasted everyone's time. That's my bad.
No, that's okay. You got to try.
Yeah, got to investigate stuff.
And Elga, you wanted to see if there were like locked drawers at any of the desks or anything?
Anything that has like a lock on it, potentially cabinets, desks.
Make an investigation check.
There's not really any cabinets.
It's mostly boxes, but there are some desks.
Okay.
So three.
No, you don't find anything. But it is mostly like desks like you would see at a school, not like some desks. Okay. So three. No, you don't find anything,
but it is mostly like desks
like you would see at a school,
not like office desks.
So it's not like there's really any.
With like drawers.
Right.
Right as you're looking through for that,
a sandy haired half orc
is walking by the open door to room D
and says,
what are you students doing in there?
You're going to be late for class.
Hurry up.
Oh, Jesus. How do you know what is what the class will be late for in college?
Everyone has different classes at different time.
Right.
You must be a freshman.
You must be new here.
Yes, very new.
Head upstairs.
Hurry up.
Don't be late.
You're going to be in big trouble.
I'll head upstairs.
Yeah.
We'll see you there, professor.
He furrows his brow a little bit at you.
Yeah, I guess
follow suit and go upstairs.
We are late for
Professor
Hamlord's class.
Do you happen to remember what room that is?
Professor Hamlord's
class. Yeah, he's
in the lecture hall. Is that the great hall?, he's in the lecture hall.
Is that the great hall?
No, that's the great hall.
Yeah, upstairs, the lecture hall.
Okay.
Yeah, we go upstairs, or I go upstairs.
I head up there.
I don't want to be late.
You all head upstairs.
There's, again, floating signage indicating that you can visit the library, the garden, or the lecture hall.
Lecture hall.
Lecture hall. Oh, yeah. You all the garden, or the lecture hall. Lecture hall. Lecture hall.
Y'all make your way to the lecture hall.
You enter a tall, windowed classroom built like a theater.
On either side of you are rows of tables,
and in the center is a set of stairs leading down to the end of the room.
At the front of the class is a desk with a plaque that reads,
Professor Hamholt.
Behind the desk, turned away from everyone,
is a young man in a tweed vest inscribing something onto the chalkboard behind him that's in bright blue lettering.
And he's reciting.
Even a man who is pure in heart and says his prayers by night may become a wolf when
the wolfbane blooms and the full moon is brrraaah.
And he stops at the sight of you.
His eyes widen and he begins backing up towards the chalkboard.
But I thought you were in jail.
Not anymore.
Well, guess again, Wolfman.
Hey, you've been dropping a lot of stuff around town.
You're very irresponsible.
Right. See, the thing about that is...
And without warning, he takes off running and dives through the nearest window.
Oh, my goodness. about that is. And without warning, he takes off running and dives through the nearest window. Find out what happens to Hamlord
on the next episode of Tales from the
Stinky Dragon. He seems pretty innocent.
I don't know.
Guess we gotta find a new lead.
All right.
Well, thanks for listening, everybody.
We'll be back next week with another episode.
And if you enjoyed the podcast,
give us a follow on social media at StinkyDragonPod
at all the popular places where people use social media.
I hope Hamlord didn't land on Henry. Oh no!
Oh my goodness.
Don't forget to check out our
new Stinky YouTube. It's like
regular YouTube, just, you know, a little
stinky. We've got some Stinky Dragon content on there.
We're uploading all of Campaign 2 on there
as well as puppet videos and other
stinky content. Just search for
Tales from the Stinky Dragon on YouTube. This episode
of Tales from the Stinky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst,
written, edited, and composed by Micah Reisinger
with additional editing work by David Saunier.
Here's a quick shout out to folks that interacted with us
on social media recently. Here's some NPCs
named after them in this episode.
Limber Lizzy the Abrelion,
named after at Lizzy Linlin on Instagram.
Zuzu Top, the Abrelion Magician,
named after at the Animal Overlord on Instagram.
Hamlord, the Wolfman's Assistant, named after user Lord of the Ham on Reddit.
Stacey Fassett, the Orc Jeweler, named after at Stacey Face on Instagram.
And Custodium Duststorm, named after at MXDuststorm on Instagram.
Also want to give a special thanks to some friends who provide VO for characters in this episode.
Zutop, the Abrelian, voiced by Alfredo Diaz at Alfredo Plays. Limber Lizzy, the Boneless Abrelian, voiced by Alfredo Diaz, at AlfredoPlays.
Limber Lizzy, the Boneless Abrelian,
voiced by Achievement Hunter's Lindsay Jones,
at IamLindsayJones.
Hamlord, the Wolfman's Assistant,
voiced by Nick Schwartz.
Stacey Fassett, the Orc Jeweler,
voiced by Stacey Cabin,
our very own broadcast intern.
Henry, voiced by Ash Hildreth
from the Achievement Hunter post team.
So tune in next time
for another thrilling episode
of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.