Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Deja Ürbloom - Ep. 15: Came in like a T-Wrecking Ball
Episode Date: August 24, 2021The Interns have a run in with the dinosaurs of Steinmänn and traverse through the treacherous caverns underneath the district. Follow us on social/buy some merch! https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStin...kyDragon Visit http://joinhoney.com/DRAGON to get Honey for free. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Peanut butter and bacon biscuits?
Has HomeSense always had all this great pet stuff?
Oh, and Dad, look.
Huh?
Made with locally sourced ingredients.
We should get these for the dogs.
Peanut butter and bacon biscuits.
That sounds like human food, not dog treats.
But they're only $10.
$10?
You know I love to spoil my little fur babies.
Put them in the cart.
Deal so good, everyone approves.
Only at HomeSense.
This is a Rooster Teeth production.
Good knock.
It's Gollum Gals Night at the Stinky Dragon.
Lurch on in and try our latest drink, Sazerok.
It's a craggy cocktail of bitters and brandy on the rocks,
or on the clay, or on the crystal, your choice, of course.
Last time, our adventurers picked up some Deja Violets again and again and again until they finally made their way to Ironhoft.
There they met Allie and her ironclad halflings battling a vengeful elemental that kept coming back for more.
The interns managed to learn a new trade, blacksmithing,
and built a cage to put an end to this recurring nightmare for now.
Reach for a rocking chair and cobble a cocktail because it's time to dish the dirt.
Can I say something real quick?
Yeah, go for it. I love that the first arc, we were in a western desert town.
So my brother wrote in for you to be, you know, coming in like, howdy ho.
And then this one's German themed, but you just keep going back to your like old prospector voice because you can't do a German accent.
Old prospector is an easy voice to do.
I'm Con Bullen, y'all.
Here we go.
Like we said, these are all supposed to be stories told in the Stinky Dragon.
So technically it's the same character doing the intro for all of the stories.
Technically.
All right.
All right.
I'm fine with the old prospector staying with us for a long time.
Well, shucks howdy.
Well, shucks howdy.
Well, shucks howdy.
Toss me a sarsaparilla and call me Sally.
What's the difference between sarsaparilla and root beer?
Is there a difference?
I don't know.
I think there might just be a different root, maybe? I don't know. I think there might just be
a different root, maybe? I don't know.
I'd like one right now, though. But we gotta
play D&D. What's going on, Gus? There is
a difference. Hold on. I'm finding out. Sarsaparilla
is a soft drink
originally made from the vine.
It's like a ginger beer. Yeah.
It's similar in flavor to root beer.
Yeah. Interesting. You ever watch
Pickleball Scenes? I'll take a sarsaparilla.
Yeah.
Let's get to it.
Let's play some D&D.
Let's roll some dice.
All right.
A smattering of slate clouds
blanket across the dim indigo sky.
A strong breeze whistles through
the cobblestone streets of Ironhoft
as you look off into the distance
towards Steinman.
You hear a T-Rex roaring.
The young man at your feet
quivers in his muddy, tattered clothes.
He snatches Allie by the chest plate and meekly says,
And then he faints onto her chest.
Do you guys normally have dinosaurs here in the town?
He didn't say dinosaur. He said dinosaur.
That could be even scarier.
I just want to know, like, is this normal that you have dinosaurs?
Or are we experiencing, like, is it like the dinosaurs are loose that we normally have in cages?
Or is it like we don't normally have dinosaurs and there's dinosaurs here in town?
Allie looks at you and says, I have no idea what this human is on about.
What the devil are dino-whatevers?
Sounds like something only humans could make up. I have no idea what this human is on about. What the devil are dino-whatevers? Oh.
Sounds like something only humans could make up.
That noise we heard was probably nothing more than a squeaky sailboat trolley needing some much-needed lubrication.
Kyborg, while taking off his sunglasses,
grabs their head and cranes it and says,
they do travel in herds.
You can't just jump in with quotes like that.
It's got to actually pertain to what's happening, okay?
Well, I was showing them. I was doing the thing
like he forces her to look at the dinosaurs
because she doesn't see them because she's talking about a little leaf.
Allie thinks that life finds a way.
Thank you.
Anyway, we have more important business than human
myths. She nudges the young man off
her chest and he slides to the ground.
I believe honor and reward are in order
for capturing this tempestuous creature
Chanel. She points to the cage
you all built. And more importantly
for acquiring the swing blade blade of glory.
I'll take that big fella. She holds out her
hand to Gum Gum. Could I
have that as my reward? Most
definitely not. Yeah, that is not what we
agreed upon for your reward. I know
I'm asking for a friend
as a friend.
We're going to have another episode where Gum Gum hoards materials and gets upset with
everyone.
No, I don't.
I don't think so.
I think Gum Gum will hand it over.
I'm just asking.
No, Ali says no.
No, I can tell you 100% for certain that we will not be partnering with the swing blade
blade of glory.
Listen, Ali, if you just take the sword away, he has no object permanence,
and he'll forget about it in about five minutes.
She reaches out a little closer for the sword.
Okay, here you go.
Excellent.
I give Gum-Gum a treat to positive reinforce him doing a good thing.
What kind of treat?
The treat is a rock.
To Mud, that's a treat.
And Miserable Rod.
Bart does a little dance in order to make Gum Gum forget that that was just taken from him.
Just to cheer him up a little bit.
Is the dance just with your key chain?
Just dancing around your keys?
Shiny.
Make a performance roll.
Let's see how good your dance is.
First roll of the session.
Here we go.
We got a 24, baby.
Ooh, that's an excellent dance. GumGum, look, you can't look away
Gum-Gum starts dancing too
Roll for performance, Gum-Gum
Yeah, make a performance check
Let's see what Gum-Gum's dance is like
10
10
He's keeping the rhythm
I mean, it's not exceptional or anything
But it's not terrible He's forgotten all rhythm. He's not, I mean, it's not exceptional or anything, but it's not terrible.
You've seen worse.
He's forgotten all about the schwing blade blade of glory.
I see the dancing characters and I say,
they do travel in herds.
They don't stop.
Since we've gotten that take care of the sword,
what's our actual riches and glory that we get?
You all get one item from the blacksmith slash armory
and Allie hands over 10 gold pieces to each of you.
Nice.
And of course, we go to that same fame, repute, glory
amongst the halflings of Ironhoff.
Sure, why not?
Which is just, you know, irreplaceable.
Do we have options for what the blacksmith has?
You can get like simple weapons, martial melee weapons,
some armor,
different gear that you might imagine
being at a blacksmith.
Any computers operating with a Unix system?
It's a transparant joke.
So do you happen to have any sort of
maybe small armor that I could put on,
say, a badger?
Badger armor.
Yes. I mean, they have small armor because it's put on, say, a badger. Badger armor. Yes.
I mean, they have small armor because it's mainly for halflings, but nothing that goes down to
badger size. What about like
armor made for a baby? You could get
like some light armor and
cut it down.
We do know how to blackspit
now. We do know how.
They could custom make you
something. You could pick it up. It'll take them a while to
do it. I'd actually appreciate that.
I'd love to protect my little gumbo.
They could probably make some
studded leather
armor that you could pick up in a
few days once they get it made.
Right. I'd like to do that.
Okay. Is there
anything I could buy,
armor or anything like that, that would increase my armor class?
Or is that kind of just set in stone?
No, I mean, let's see.
What do you have?
I think I just have leather.
Yeah.
Light armor leather.
Parts of leather, daddy.
Yeah, you could pick something up that would improve your armor class.
The problem that you would face is heavier armor normally decreases your dexterity.
Oh, I don't want that.
I like being dexterous.
So that's probably why you're wearing light armor right now.
Plus, as far as you might only be able to wear light armor.
I'm going to look up the armor types.
I heard what you said, Barb.
What did you say?
What did I say? Now I forget.
You said like, oh, yeah, I want to say dexterous or something.
Dexterous.
I don't know what the actual word is.
Dexterous.
Dexterous.
Yeah.
You could use a shield, which would give you plus two to your armor class.
Okay.
Yeah, let's do that.
The disadvantage would conceivably be that you only have one free hand.
If you wanted to do something two-handed,
you have to get rid of the shield.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Well, I'll just stay as is.
Okay.
Does Gum Gum want anything?
Gum Gum?
Yeah.
Does Gum Gum want anything?
Duh.
The swing blade blade of glory and an immovable rod.
Could I have some handcuffs?
Oh. Gum Gum. some handcuffs? Oh.
Handcuffs. Yeah, that would be here.
Some for hands and some for feet.
Like shackles.
Yeah, one for hands and one for feet.
Two separate ones. Or is that two?
That would be two. Eh, no.
They'll toss them in. We'll say that they're all
combined. Kyborg didn't take anything.
Yeah, you get some manacles.
Don't you have some already?
I broke them.
And I threw them.
Threw them in a fit of jealousy.
Oh, do I have them then?
No, I broke them.
Remember, I shoved the key and it broke.
That was after I broke them.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you can get some manacles, Gum-Gum.
Okay, so I'll just, is that like two then?
Yeah, we'll say two.
Thank you.
Canonically, while we're doing this, there are dinosaurs in another village just tearing things up.
But we need the handcuffs.
As we're just like, hmm, got any shields?
What is the one thing that dinosaurs have, are weak?
It's their hands, it's their weakness.
I mean, maybe a T-Rex, but I don't think the bigger ones really have weak hands.
But that's why I need handcuffs.
Handcuffs.
All right.
Stay tuned for Gum-Gum putting handcuffs on a giant dinosaur.
Sordo pipes in and says, maybe we could use a metal crank for the recapulator.
I think he's talking about the recapitulator.
Capuleta.
I think he's talking about the recapitulator.
No, I think we're good.
No, yeah, I was looking around.
I don't think, I don't think we're good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Personally, I think we're fine.
I don't think so.
We'll probably find it in the next part of town.
Yeah.
Okay, Raja Daja.
Could we have a crank for the recapitulator, please?
We definitely need it for many purposes, including the plot.
Ooh, we're fresh out of those.
What the hell?
What the hell?
What the hell?
I'm kidding.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
We got a grinder cranks.
You could probably use one of those for your recapitulator, whatchamacallit.
Yeah.
We'd like that, please. So please hand it over. There you go.
Alright. Check
and check. Good call.
Going down your shopping list.
Anybody else? We need a net.
A net?
I don't think you'd have a net here.
It's more of a... Funicello?
God. A metal net?
A metal net. For
the dinosaur? Dinosaur.
Maybe we should
get some, like, rope to tie its legs together.
You know? Make a trip.
I have rope. You have rope?
Okay. I have 50 feet of rope.
Allie looks up at the overcast moon
as a light drizzle begins to trickle from overhead.
My, my, the time
certainly has gotten away from us today.
We all should really be heading indoors for the evening.
Stoutly Bart, do you and your brave troop need somewhere to stay for the evening?
We do, yes.
I think me and my comrades could use a rest, perhaps.
Right, fellas?
Mud is close to death, so yes.
Yes, yes, very tired.
Follow me. Let's go over here.
She leads you to a nearby metal building.
She opens up the door and inside it's like barracks-like quarters and bunk bed cots filling the room.
Feel free to rest here for the evening, she says.
Perfect.
Bart winks at her.
It's going to be hard to sleep through all that dinosaur noise trudging around, destroying.
Go ahead and make a charisma check. Bart.
You got it.
Ooh, 12.
That's 12.
Oh, she gives you,
Ellie gives you a polite smile in return.
Excellent.
And then she turns her back and says,
that's disgusting.
All right, so everyone go ahead.
You can take a long rest at this point.
Yay!
Thank you very much.
This is the nicest thing I've ever done.
Oh, my spell slots are back, baby.
I got full HP, baby.
Room to breathe.
You are awoken of what you assume is the midnight bell
chiming from the nearby tower.
Oh.
You hear Sordo say,
Ow, what? Did I sleep through my alarm again?
You hear a muffled but resounding voice outside.
My dearest herbs of Erbloom, there is plenty of time to sleep later.
Awaken, fair citizens, and heed my next melodious movement.
Adagio!
Adagio!
He places loot again and a drawn-out
musical motif echoes through the district.
This guy needs to take a break.
Are there any
magic walls popping up while this is happening?
You're still inside the barracks at this point.
Mud gets up and looks outside.
Gum Gum Covers is yours.
Mud, you look outside and you see an emerald wave slowly making its way across the district from west to east.
Towards us?
Yes.
We need to get up and we need to get moving.
We're about to be consumed by a green wall of energy.
All right.
I'm up.
You might have to shake gum gum.
What do I roll for that?
Kick?
Unarmed strike, I think?
Persuasion?
Persuasion?
No, that's not good.
That's a four, my dude.
Gum gum, you think mud is trying to bother you.
Bart comes over and he goes, I know just the way to do it.
I play his little morning song
on my lute here.
And Bart whips out his lute.
What's it sound like, Barb?
It sounds like this.
Gum, gum, gum, gum.
Here comes the sun, sun, gum, gum.
It's a good song.
Gum, gum, it's your favorite morning song.
Yeah, I can tell that she's playing it.
I still have my ears covered, but I get up anyway.
Okay, y'all make your way outside?
Yeah.
Okay.
As you all head out, you see Allie and her halfling platoons are assembled in the courtyard,
armed and in braced positions as the emerald wave sweeps towards them.
Allie yells out, hold your position, halflings.
Whatever happens next, we'll take it on to get. And the green
billow washes over the halflings and they're
instantly petrified in place.
Their fearless faces frozen in time.
What do you think the rest of her sentence was
going to be?
We'll never know. We're going to
get ice cream?
Oh, maybe. You guys
want to go get ice cream? Let's go get ice cream.
Which district has ice cream? That's a get ice cream. Which district has ice cream?
That's a really good idea.
She is a pretty clever girl.
Ah.
Dress park reverence.
That's how you do it.
So then if they're all consumed by the green energy,
can we head towards the human village
with the so-called dinos?
That seems to be away from where the green wave is approaching,
so you could head in that direction.
Well, Mutt starts walking that direction.
I assume everyone else follows?
Bart follows him.
Yeah.
You hear Sleek pluck his strings,
and the emerald wave halts at the northern border of Ironhoff.
Sleek offers a wink and a bow,
and then vanishes into the Glocken Tower, same as before.
Amongst the emerald glow and drizzling rain,
you manage to see a signpost pointing to your left that reads Steinman District.
That's where the dinosaur came from, right?
Well, the person who said dino-s-s-s-s-s-s-
Came from there.
Yeah, came from Steinman District.
You all follow the path past more flowerbeds
until you reach the edge of a cobblestone courtyard.
On your right is a line of luxurious fieldstone villas
with ivy-laced terraces and ruby-bricked pools.
The other half of town is ensconced with a pristine palatial mansion made of Dalmatian stone and featuring towering spires taller than trees.
A frosted glass sign on the front reads, Manor, Manor.
We're in the rich part of town, I think.
Manor, Manor. I wonder who lives there.
A man or...
An astro man.
Let's go to the manor
and find out.
Yeah, maybe they have
a little cocktail sandwiches
or something.
Oh, I'd love a cucumber sandwich.
That'd be fantastic.
A little brunch.
We got to be on our best behavior
though, guys.
So gum gum.
You need to be pinkies up.
You need to be very polite.
You need to be very kind.
And then I kick
down the door.
No. No, it has to happen.
There's dinosaurs about. We need to do this.
We gotta be fast. We gotta be efficient.
You hear lute music leisurely play, and as
you step into the courtyard,
the whole district transforms dramatically
into a lush glade of mossy stone
ruins, splayed in a circle.
They look to be overrun with vines and overgrown brush, but accented with small torches flickering in the rain.
Wait, so it transforms into an old place?
Seems like it.
Yeah, it's like overgrown with vegetation and stone ruins.
Oh, maybe this is like some type of time portal place uh yeah maybe
it all got pushed into the future yeah everyone go ahead and roll me a perception check okay
mud is specifically looking for uh will smith got a 21 16. i'm gonna roll but i still have my
my hands over my ears so okay you're at're at your disadvantage then so roll twice and then take a
Little one. That's what I figured 21
kind of six
We're gonna start from lowest to highest gum gum
You feel a little queasy and sluggish you're distracted by the rain that's starting to pour down in thick drops. Hmm. I
Stick my tongue out
It's acid rain.
You're dead.
Reroll character.
It's nighttime, by the way.
Yeah, it's dark.
Kyborg, as you look around,
you notice that even you yourself look different.
Your clothes, armor, and weapons
have all transformed into primitive materials
like rough stone, animal pelt, raw bone.
You also notice that the area is vacant of people.
The only evidence of human life is the fragmented stone ruins.
Mud and Bart, you both feel like you're being watched.
In the distance, you hear something pounding again and again.
Mud readies a spell.
Okay.
Bart giggles to himself because you said pounding.
And then he taps Gum-Gum and Kyborg.
And he goes, hey, we think someone might be watching us.
Get ready.
Prepare yourselves.
Okay.
Does Gum-Gum hear that?
Is he still covering his ears?
Yeah, he took his ears off.
He took his ears off?
Oh, my God.
He took his hands off his ears to try and funnel the rain into his mouth.
Oh, okay.
Gotcha.
Okay.
I slap Kyborg's ass as well.
Kyborg, you want to do anything to prepare?
It's too aggro to pull out my bow.
I mean, you do you, my dude.
I pull out my bow.
And I get an arrow ready to go.
And I say, there's something out there waiting for us.
And it ain't for a man.
That's a Predator quote.
That's less Jurassic Park, more Predator.
Ah, Kyborg.
I see you're a very cultured man.
I love that movie.
Thank you.
Thank you.
You hear a heavy pounding sound in the distance
moving its way towards you all from the north.
From the north?
Yeah.
I don't know what to do in this situation.
Hold on.
We're all pretty close together, right?
Yeah.
Could I cast invisibility?
Yeah, you could.
It would be hard to spot you if you were invisible with all the mossy ruins encircling you.
Does your invisibility have, like, an area of effect?
I was going to just look at that,
but I think it's just one creature.
So I want to cast invisibility on myself.
Okay.
Bart pops out of existence.
It's raining, and I want to cast Mask of the Wild,
so I attempt to obscure myself.
You can attempt to hide even when you're only lightly obscured, okay?
And Mud casts Pass Without Trace,
since we're all popping all of our stealth thingies.
Pass Without Trace.
Is that like you fart without being detected?
Is it silent?
Yeah.
No, it's not Pass Gas Without Trace.
Yes.
A veil of shadows and silence radiates from you,
masking you and your companions from detection.
Yeah, mud definitely farted.
Definitely farted.
Plus 10 bonus to dexterity checks, stealth,
and can't be tracked by a magical means.
All right, and Gum-Gum, gonna do anything?
Well, that helps Gum-Gum.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was gonna say, you should turn into a goat.
I will not be turning into anything that is lunch.
Thank you very much.
Can someone make a goat?
I don't think I've seen a goat yet either.
Kyborg, you go ahead and make a stealth check with plus 10.
16.
So 26, because Pass Without Trace is also helping you out.
You're welcome.
Thanks, goat man.
I'm not a goat.
Since you're doing Pass Without Trace,
Mud, Gum Gum, and Bart also go ahead and roll stealth checks.
Okay, even though I'm invisible?
Yeah.
30.
You have advantage because you're invisible, Bart.
Okay.
Oh, that's 19 on one.
I'll cast it again. Do I have advantage because of're invisible, Bart. Okay. Oh, that's 19 on one.
I'll cast it again.
Do I have advantage because of his thing?
No, you just get plus 10.
So you got a 27.
19 is my higher one.
So 29 with Bart.
Yeah.
And then is that 30 for you, Mud?
Yeah, 30 for me.
It's pretty sneaky.
Oh, those are all excellent rolls.
I forgot to mention that whenever Bart went invisible,
I said, he left us.
He left us.
Is that a Jurassic Park reference?
Yes, it is.
It is.
Excellent.
Bart, make a goat.
You hear the pounding come to a halt.
Glistening in the showering moonlight to the north,
you spot scaly jaws bigger than a horse slinking in the shadows behind a set of giant stone feet.
A single unblinking red eye flickers
above the rows of jagged teeth and a tail
swishes back and forth.
I'm not saying anything.
What are we supposed to do
with it, dinosaur?
I don't know.
Probably kill it.
You see the monstrous lizard sniffing around.
It's stopping.
It's sniffing around in the air.
Bart, make a goat.
You think I should be a goat?
No, make a goat.
Minor illusion.
Oh, yes.
Excellent idea.
Bart all of a sudden is overcome with this idea
to use minor illusion to create a little goat in the path of this creature.
Guys, I think it's only fair that since we're in stealth mode,
we need a whisperer for the next, you know,
until we are noticed.
You're not whispering.
It's all right.
It's starting now.
Starting now.
Starting now. So Bart did Minor Illusion.
Is that right?
Bart cast.
You see, yeah.
Gus, please.
You got to whisper with us.
You got to get in the mood with us.
Gus is like, no.
I'm the dinosaur.
I'm a dinosaur.
You see a goat appear in front of the giant T-Rex.
It lets out a really loud scream and it charges at the goat.
And it passes through it because it's only a minor wound.
There's nothing actually there.
It seems to be very angry now.
Okay, we know he's not a nice friend.
What?
Psst.
I can't turn into this dinosaur yet. It's too high of a CR rating. Psst. Psst. I can't turn into this dinosaur yet.
It's too high of a CR rating.
Psst.
Psst.
Mud looks around at what's making that noise.
Steam.
Make a perception check. Steam escaping Vince somewhere.
24.
You notice a camouflaged head peeking out from a nearby hatch
that's covered in foliage and stones?
A hatch?
Yeah.
Is it John Locke?
The camouflaged head peeks out of the hatch and whispers,
Follow me if you want to live.
So many references.
That's a Terminator reference.
Hey guys, follow me.
And Mud starts making his way there.
Follow you with what?
Follow me if you don't want to get eaten by a goddamn dinosaur.
Okay, that sounds good.
We need to hold hands so we don't lose each other
because I can't see any of y'all.
Okay, okay.
Everybody hold on to mud.
Okay.
Okay.
I'm the easiest target to find.
I hold his hand, but I squeeze it a little too hard.
Okay.
I'm a big boy. I can handle it. Your Pass Without but I squeeze it a little too hard. Okay. I'm a big boy.
I can handle it.
Your Pass Without Trace
is actually a little overpowered,
John.
Yeah, you gave everyone
a plus 10 on their skill.
Yeah, it's pretty fantastic.
That's a good move.
I mean, that's a good move.
Yeah.
Y'all climb into the hatch
and your savior
seals the hatch shut
and darkness surrounds you.
You hear them say,
Your eyes will adjust in a moment.
The name is Fletcher N. Boone,
but you can call me Fletch.
Sure enough, your eyes start to adjust
as you see a gaunt, grey-skinned dwarf
staring at all of you.
His bearded face is covered in mud
and his nappy hair is filled with leaves.
He's wearing a leather vest, a loincloth,
a belt across his torso,
and a necklace with an enormous red eyeball attached in a glass case.
Fletch holds out his right arm for a handshake.
You notice he does not have a left arm.
Oh.
You going to do something, Kyborg?
What is the belt holding up if he has a loincloth on?
The belt is across his torso.
Think of it like a bandolier.
Bandolier.
Gotcha.
Okay. And you do see that attached to it like a bandolier. Gotcha. Okay.
And you do see that attached to it is a pick. Like pickaxe, kinda?
Yeah. Mud shakes his hand
because no one else is. Oh, there you go.
I was letting Kyborg have
a moment with someone else
with a deformity, but...
Oh!
Very enthusiastically shakes your hand.
After being snubbed by Kyborg.
I push mud out of the way and I say, Fletch, you son of a B.
And then I, I don't know if you can hear that, but we clap hands perfectly together.
Okay.
Ah, nice.
CIA got you pushing too many pencils.
Yeah, you're right.
Wow, nice.
Fletch leads you down the dim tunnel.
At the end of the passage, you spot two glowing lights.
My place is just up ahead.
As you reach the lights, you notice they're actually Sangria Knight.
You also see the passage splits off into three chambers.
What exactly happened to this part of town?
Ever since everything happened, I've been stuck down here
trying to make a living for a few years.
Oh, that's not accurate.
A couple years now.
Yeah, it's been a hard few years trying to get by.
Are we in like a Jumanji situation? What's going on?
Sounds like we're in a Jumanji situation.
Yeah, we just came from outside and everything seemed to be, you know, functioning.
Palatial.
How many years has it been down here? That was years
ago when music played in the Glocken
Tower and everything transformed.
I have no way of keeping track
of time, but it's been years.
Oh my goodness.
Is there
anybody else in the town? Are you the
only one left? Hmm.
If I had to guess, half of Steinman has been eliminated by that T-Rex out there.
But there are still some people around like that blowhard Hugh man are still holding onto power despite all of this mayhem that's going on.
He lives on the other side of the district.
Hmm.
Well, would love to see your house.
I missed so many birthdays.
I've lost track of birthdays.
I must be over at least 17 now.
Did you say you must be 17?
At least.
How old's Gum-Gum supposed to be?
15.
Really?
Yeah.
In like dog years or?
Why is Gum- Gum Gum so young?
That's just how old he is.
He's a young boy.
Now I feel weird for being so friendly with you.
Why are we traveling with a minor?
Why did we take him to a brothel?
He saw you with the bed warmer.
I didn't see it.
I think we have to go to a lot like court.
Yeah.
I didn't see anything.
People grew up when they were a lot younger in those
times.
I mean, technically, I'm a
adolescent from fear bogs.
Fletch perks up at the mention
of minors. Are you talking about minors?
Oh, is that what you used to do?
Fletch,
my fella,
I hope you're referring to the people underground
chopping up some brick.
I mean, stone.
He's tugging on his beard and then his hand rests on his pick that's on his belt.
You know, miners.
Oh, are you a miner?
I spent years mining.
It's my trade.
It's in my blood.
In my younger years, I was a miner in Boulder Ray.
That's how I got all of the Sangria Knight.
He points at the Sangria Knight
in the walls. That's where we're
from, kind of. Yeah, were you
in the cave-in that happened in Boulder Ray?
Oh no, that
was tragic. After my
time, you know. I was kidnapped from
Boulder Ray, actually. Terrible time.
Kidnapped from Boulderay?
Uh, did you ever know about the Infinites? Of course I've
heard of the Infinites, but I've never seen
them. I've been stuck in Humana
for decades now. Oh.
My goodness.
So you were kidnapped, you say?
Yes, forced to work for Humana
at his estate. So he was a
minor miner.
Do you remember who kidnapped you?
Some of Hugh's people.
He's a terribly vile man.
I don't like him.
He has staff that procures servants for him from across the land.
Is it a magic staff?
Magic staff?
No, they are just people.
Your friend has spent too much time in the mines, huh?
Yeah, he's got mine sickness.
Yeah, that's totally what it is.
So, Fletch,
there's a chance that we're dealing with
a bit of a
time magic issue.
Because, see, we just came from
outside of this part
of the city, and it's not
all overgrown with shrubbery and dinosaurs.
And it seems that maybe your district
is trapped in some sort of time bubble?
That's preposterous.
We've been here for years.
Right.
That's how time works if you add magic with it.
With his one good arm, he scratches the top of his head.
That's how the top of his head.
That's all elf talk to me. Well, I'm a fear bog,
so I take offense to that.
I don't know much about
all that magic stuff.
Just out of curiosity, Fletch,
buddy old pal, what happened to
your other arm? The T-Roc ate
it. I lost my arm, but
he lost an eye.
You got a dinosaur eye on your necklace?
That's badass.
I'm pretty proud of it.
A good trade.
Good.
I don't know.
I've been down here ever since the day that I lost my arm and fought a T-Rex.
Found these tunnels, carved out my own bunker.
Do you keep calling him a T-Rex?
Yes, the T-Rex.
Not Rex.
No, the tyrannical wrecker. Ah. a T-Rex? Yes! The T-Rex! Not Rex. No!
The Tyrannical Wrecker!
Ah!
It's on purpose.
What happened that made the T-Wrecker
show up, exactly?
I don't know.
I can't quite say.
Is there anything more than just the T-Wrecker, or just
that one? There are other creatures
out there, but this is the T-Rex domain now.
Domain.
Well, we're trying to find some materials
in order to construct a device
that might help your situation.
What kind of materials are you looking for?
Well, so far we've got two of the four,
but we still need glass and wood.
You don't say. Yes.
Humana is the last mason
and the glassblower's diamond.
I thought we'd find a connection
here at some point.
He's a real jerk, though.
Piece of work.
He's, where is he?
You said he was on the other side of town or something?
Yeah, he's on the other side of the district.
So we can't get the glass here.
Do your tunnels extend that far?
Can you dig a hole?
You can try going through the tunnels.
Through the storage room are the tunnels that lead to the district.
Can you take us?
I cannot take you.
We'll give you Kyborg's arm.
No, no we won't. He squints We'll give you Qyborg's arm. No, no we won't.
He squints and takes a look at Qyborg's arm.
That is a good looking arm.
Thank you.
You can't have it though.
Okay, I'm sorry, Qyborg.
Not yet.
He says, yeah, follow me.
Come this way.
And he leads you all out of the common room over to the other chamber.
One of the other chambers.
Looks to be a storage room.
It's filled with boxes of onions, artichokes,
a bunch of sacks.
There's a drinking trough
and you see a makeshift door with no hinges on it
at the other end of the storage room.
No hinges.
How do we open it then?
How do I kick that down?
He says, there you go.
That's the entrance to the tunnels
if you want to go through.
Do you pull it?
Someone want to try to open it?
We don't have a good history with doors.
I will try.
Okay, Gum-Gum is brave and tries to open the door.
As you reach for the handle, the door falls to the ground with a clattering thud.
The dust settles and before you are a handful of dank and gloomy underground tunnels sprawling every which way, each offering nothing but sheer blackness.
Well, that's terrifying.
Do get, do get, do get.
I got dark vision.
Do we need to light up some torches?
Oh, yeah, I have a torch.
I think we do.
I have dark vision.
Do I have an animal I can turn into so I can see the dark?
Turn into a bat?
I have a candle.
You have a candle.
You could get on my back.
Hot, melted wax dripping down your spine.
Do badgers have dark vision?
They're nocturnal.
Badgers have dark vision.
All right.
Then I turn into a badger and it's me and Gumbo.
Okay.
And then what are you doing, Bart?
Because you don't have any low light vision.
Right.
I'll hop on someone's back.
Get up.
On Gum-Gum.
Yeah.
Okay.
So Bart's riding on Gum-Gum's back.
My 15-year-old friend.
Gum-Gum, you can see you have dark vision?
Yeah.
Okay.
And Kyborg, what are you doing?
Dark vision.
You got dark vision.
Okay.
Oh, yeah.
You're an elf.
Yeah.
Also, we have Brink with us still, right?
Yeah, he's not saying much.
Dude, I forgot about Brink.
Just want to put that out there.
Brink and Sordo, they're talking to each other.
Okay.
Yeah, you all step in and you hear Fletch say,
Yes, good luck.
You are going to need it.
Fletch reaches down for the door and pulls back into the frame,
sealing off what little light was
shining into the subterranean labyrinth.
Hey everyone, thanks for
listening so far through this episode
of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. I want to
give a quick shout out to
someone for the maze slash
labyrinth mechanic we're about to use. It's
originally developed by a Reddit user named Amazing Wizard
and our own Micah made his own cards,
put in a little bit of work, kind of tweaked it a little bit.
I think it's a great mechanic.
I think it's an awesome way to do maze generation.
And you'll see what we're talking about here in just a sec.
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That's the sound of fried chicken with a spicy history.
Thornton Prince was a ladies' man.
To get revenge, his girlfriend hid spices in his fried chicken.
He loved it so much, he opened Prince's Hot Chicken.
Hot chicken in the window.
This is one of many sounds in Tennessee with a story to tell.
To hear them in person, plan your trip at tnvacation.com.
Tennessee sounds perfect.
As I always want to remind you,
if you could give us a follow on social media
at StinkyDragonPod,
that would be super cool.
And you can interact with us
using hashtag StinkyDragonPod.
And maybe you get your name in the show
as an NPC in a future arc.
And of course, if you could rate us
wherever you listen to podcasts,
Spotify,
Apple podcasts,
I don't know,
whatever other ones that exist out there,
give us a thumbs up five stars,
whatever they got on your platform.
We would really appreciate it.
And of course,
if you could tell a friend or just tell a stranger.
Cool.
Okay.
Should we set breadcrumbs?
Breadcrumbs.
All right, we have a little mini game
that we're going to be playing
to get you guys through the labyrinth here.
So we've got a deck of cards
that represents the progress and perils
waiting for you on your journey through this maze.
There's four different kinds of cards in the deck.
There's right path cards, dead end cards,
trap cards, and monster cards.
Uh-oh.
Right path as in correct path.
Correct.
Yeah.
Okay.
So everyone go ahead and roll initiative
for order that we're going to go through this,
and I'll explain.
11.
I got a 14.
I got a 12.
16. Am I seeing a 14. I got a 12. 16.
Am I seeing a live video of this?
Yes, there is a video,
which will help you guys
if you take a look at Discord.
Oh.
Is this you right now, Micah?
Hello.
It is Micah.
You can see Micah's hands.
So the gameplay is going to be based
on this initiative that you just rolled.
Each of you takes one turn per round.
On each turn, you're going to see three cards get dealt out face down in the river.
On your turn, you can take an action and or pick a card from the river to be revealed.
There's only three type of actions available.
And once an action is used, it cannot be used again until all actions have been used.
And once all the actions have been used,
then three different actions will be unlocked.
Whoa.
You've got forge a path, scout ahead,
it's elementary, careful consideration, and boost morale.
I can explain all of those as they pop up as we get to that part.
Okay.
As far as the different cards I mentioned,
right path cards represent making the correct choice
when entering an intersection.
When you reveal a right path card,
the party scores one point
towards finding the entrance to your destination.
So the goal is just to collect enough points
using right path cards to get to your destination.
Dead end cards represent taking the incorrect path,
requiring you to double back into the labyrinth.
When revealed, dead end cards stay in play until they fill the river,
when they are removed and an additional monster card is added to the discard pile.
Oh no.
Monster cards represent a monster in the labyrinth drawing closer to the party.
When revealed, you earn one point towards encountering a monster.
When you reveal two monster cards, you encounter a monster,
at which point you enter combat using your initiative,
and the DM, me, will roll for the monster's initiative and slot it in.
When the party successfully defeats the monster,
one monster card is removed from the deck,
lowering the chance to encounter one again.
Okay.
Now the last card is a trap card.
It represents traps.
You'll use your skills and abilities to avoid the hazards
laid throughout the labyrinth,
each with varying degrees of difficulty and effects.
And we'll get to the specifics of monsters and traps
as we encounter those.
Okay.
Awesome.
There's five total actions that you could possibly take,
but we're going to roll and randomly eliminate two of them,
so every round you only really have three actions available to you.
So we're going to get rid of...
Get rid of intellect one.
Two and one. So forge your path and scout ahead those are the only twos i would have been good
so forge a path adds two additional right path cards to the discard pile from outside the game
scout ahead reveals the top card of the deck in addition to a card in the river and you get
to choose one.
So those two are unavailable to you currently.
Those would be nice.
Great, now we got the ones that are based off of
intelligence, wisdom, and charisma.
It's elementary, lets you draw three cards from the deck,
choose one, and put it on the bottom of the deck,
and then you shuffle the remaining cards
and place them on the top of the deck.
Careful consideration reveals two cards in the river
on this turn, and you get to choose one.
And boost morale removes a dead-end card in the river from the game.
Oh, okay.
Question.
So then to use those actions, do we have to roll that stat,
the, like, wisdom is careful consideration?
Correct.
You have to make a check.
A check.
Okay.
So Mud rolled a 16 on initiative, so you get to go first.
Great.
You see we have three cards dealt out for the river.
They're on top of that little map there.
Okay, so those three cards represent those three directions,
like left, right, and forward.
Correct, yeah.
Left, straight, or right.
Yeah, we'll post a screenshot of this,
what we're looking at onto our Twitter.
Okay, I love this.
Well, since Mud is going first,
I'd love to flex some wisdom
and do a wisdom check.
You're going to do careful consideration.
Yes, please.
And it's just a check?
Yeah, and make a wisdom check.
That's a 10.
That's a 10.
That is insufficient for the check.
Uh-oh.
Mud tries to carefully consider,
but nothing pops to mind,
so he must choose a card.
Mud looks around and says,
I have no memory of this place.
There, I got
Chris. That's not Jurassic Park.
No. Mud
goes right. It's a dead end.
Dang it. Good start.
So you take the incorrect
path, not quite sure what's going
on. Now we have Bart.
Yes. Well, you know, I think it's time to
boost morale. So Bart is going to remove a dead end card in the river from the game and draw a
new card from the deck and place it face down in the river. If you make your check. So make your
charisma check. Charisma check is a 18. Yeah. That is successful.
So you got off to a bad start.
Mud leads you all down a path that goes nowhere.
But then Bart makes light of it, sings a little song, makes you all feel, you know, you feel better about it.
You're like, let's just start over.
This was just one bad step at the beginning.
Let's just go right back where we were.
To another dead end. Oh, no, it's another dead end.
Got another one.
Don't beat yourself up about it, Mud.
We'll get this.
Don't you worry.
It's your own fault for following a badger.
Bart gives him a little pet on the head.
Okay, Mud does like that.
And it's Bart's turn to choose a path.
Straight.
Uh-oh.
Oh, monster.
You hear the sounds of feet.
You hear movement creeping up on you from the dark. Tap dancing. Oh, no. You think the sounds of feet. You hear movement creeping up on you from the dark.
Tap dancing.
Oh, no.
You think it's getting closer.
Bart is not a big fan of the dark.
Wish I had my nightlight.
Gum gum.
Okay.
The only thing that's left is it's elementary, which is intelligence.
So let's see how that goes.
Might as well try.
Might as well try.
So gum gum.
It's all on you. It's elementary. Might as well try. Might as well try. So, Gum-Gum, it's all on you.
It's elementary.
You've got to check your intelligence.
Make that intelligence check.
I got a one.
You got a one.
A little bit of drool falls out of Gum-Gum's mouth.
Stares around the cave, not quite sure where to go.
You gain no insight, Gum-Gum.
Which direction do you want to go?
I'll go straight.
Dead end.
Dead end.
God.
We've gone nowhere so far.
You're making no progress here.
It's all right.
It's Kyborg's turn.
The skills reset.
I'm going to roll to see which ones we're getting rid of here.
Give us that strength and dex.
We got Kyborg up.
Come on.
I'm limbering up.
I'm loosening up.
Get rid of forge a path and boost morale. We got Kyborg up. Come on, I'm limbering up. I'm loosening up. Get rid of Forge a Path and boost morale.
Oh, wait, wait.
Shoot!
So you got Kyborg can scout ahead.
It's elementary or careful consideration.
Scouting ahead.
I'm going to do a dexterity check.
And here we go.
15.
15.
You're able to successfully scout ahead using your elven skills.
Which is left, might I add.
So it reveals the top card of the deck in addition to a card in the river.
And you can choose one of these.
You have a right path card or a dead end card.
Well, as we all know, I always go left.
So.
I will bite you.
Both Gumbo and I will bite you.
I don't know if I can take the right path.
I wonder if I should choose the dead end.
Gumbo and Mud are both baring their teeth and growling aggressively.
I choose the right path.
There we go.
Ding, ding, ding.
That's one right path for you guys.
Thank goodness.
We're probably halfway there, guys.
If that.
Probably like one-eighth of the way there at this point. No.
Gotta be positive.
And Mud, it is your turn.
Gonna try for another careful consideration.
Mud wants to redeem himself.
Worked out real good the first time.
Rolls a 19. Shut up.
Oh.
So Mud gets to reveal two cards
in the river. Choose one.
I'm looking at three dead ends.
What do I do?
There's only one, and it was a dead end.
So you get to choose one, and there's only one to choose,
so it's a dead end.
Yeah, I go to the straight dead end.
Yeah, you had three dead ends.
It's just not going well for you guys.
So a monster card gets added into the deck, increasing your chances of encountering a monster. Yeah, you had three dead ends. It's just not going well for you guys.
So a monster card gets added into the deck,
increasing your chances of encountering a monster.
The monsters.
Barked.
You have one option left.
So many choices here.
It's elementary, dear Watson.
Oh, it is.
It's elementary, dear Gum-Gum would be more accurate.
Dear Gum-Gum. Here comes the. Dear Gum Gum would be more accurate. Dear Gum Gum.
Here comes the intelligence.
Check that I have plus zero.
Oh, 17.
Oh, 17.
It's good.
It works.
So you get to draw three cards from the deck.
Choose one and put it on the bottom of the deck. Then you shuffle the remaining two and put them on top of the deck.
It's two dead ends and a right path.
All right.
So I guess we'll put one of the dead end cards at the bottom.
Yeah, do that.
Yeah. So put one of the dead ends on at the bottom. Yeah. Do that. Yeah.
So put one of the dead ends on the bottom.
Put those other two shuffled on the top.
On the top.
S'il vous plaît.
Merci.
Great.
And now you get to pick a direction.
Well, and, you know, to celebrate my dear friend Kyborg, let's go left.
Woo!
Right path.
Yeah!
Yeah.
Hey, hey, hey.
Right path.
You did it.
And then our ability checks reset again.
Yes, and I'm going to eliminate two.
Get three.
Roll a three, punk.
So, Scout ahead and boost morale are covered.
Okay.
We'll take it.
Gum Gum, it's on you.
What do you want to do?
I'll forge a path.
Forge a path.
Make a strength check.
18.
18, that's good.
So, you add
two additional right path cards to the
discard pile from outside the game. So it
just increases our odds, or your odds,
of finding a right path card.
Okay. And now I will go
straight. Straight and narrow.
I just want to let the listeners know that we are watching
a video feed of my brother doing all these
cards, and he keeps waving his hand around like he's
some sort of Las Vegas dealer.
Hannah White type.
I would like to put $30 on black.
It's a dead end that Gum-Gum encounters.
Gum-Gum seems to know what he's doing.
He flexes his muscles,
which is a convincing argument for you guys.
He leads the way, but it's just another dead end.
You have to circle back and go back in the direction
you came from. You're kind of fed up with that,
Kyborg. What do you want to do? I guess wisdom.
I have plus zero, so we'll go
wisdom. Kyborg carefully
considers his options.
Boom. I rolled an eight.
Insufficient. You don't
have quite enough wisdom to figure out what to do.
It's left or right, but you have no insight in which direction you should go.
Yeah, I do.
I want to go left.
Left.
Right path.
Right path.
Right path.
Hey, look at that.
That's a total of three right paths so far.
You're getting there.
Yay.
We're one one-hundredth of the way there.
Yeah.
Three hundred moves.
This episode is just two hours longer.
Mud.
Mud is going to remember elementary school
and try and not roll anything worse than a 16.
Ah, look at you.
Mud got a 16 on his intelligence check for its elementary,
so it works.
So draw three cards from the deck.
Choose one, put it on the bottom of the deck,
and shuffle the remaining cards and place them on top of the deck.
We got right path, trap, and monster.
Just put the monster on the bottom.
Call, call, call, call, call.
That's what they call you in the bedroom.
And monster on the bottom.
Business in the front, party in the back.
Monster on the bottom.
Yeah.
Monster on the bottom, trap on top. That's what Manscaped can help you the back. Monster on the bottom. Yeah. Monster on the bottom, trap on top.
That's what Manscaped can help you with, your monster on the bottom.
They're not sponsoring this episode.
Take that back.
Edit that out.
Left or right?
Let's go right.
That's a trap card.
It's a trap card.
Let me show you my trap card.
Not my blue eyes.
It's a tarp.
You hear a low rumbling sound and the ground shakes and vibrates.
Suddenly the rocks start falling from the ceiling of the cavern. It's a tarp. You hear a low rumbling sound and the ground shakes and vibrates. Suddenly, the rocks start falling from the ceiling of the cavern.
It's a cave-in.
Oh.
Everyone needs to make a dexterity save.
Oh, no.
21.
I have advantage on this. I rolled a nat 20, so I got a 22.
I rolled a 16.
All right.
Let's see Gum-Gum with advantage because of Danger Sense, correct?
Yes.
Is Gum-Gum a Spider-Man? Oh, correct? Yes. Is Gum-Gum Spider-Man?
Ooh, that's 10.
He's got advantage, though.
That's an 8.
So everyone is okay except for Gum-Gum.
The passage collapses in a heap and blocks the path before you.
What happens to me?
Gum-Gum died?
Gum-Gum takes four points of bludgeoning damage.
So because of the failure,
we add one dead-end card to the river after it clears.
I got to eliminate two of these rolls
because we got new ones.
Come on, cover intellect at least once.
Get rid of scout ahead and boost morale.
Bart.
All right.
Let's do careful consideration.
Careful consideration. Some wisdom check from Bart consideration. Careful consideration.
Some wisdom check from Bart here.
Oh, no.
Eight.
No.
Carefully considering
does not seem to be the party's forte.
This is not one that goes well for you guys.
I guess you really only have one direction
you can head in.
Bart, got to go left.
Oh, no.
It's a trap.
It's a trap. It's a trap.
We went so long without seeing one.
Like the emotive hands of Micah going, oh.
As you round a corner, you walk into sticky spider webs.
Ew.
Go ahead and make a dexterity save, Bart.
Dexterity save.
Sweet.
21.
Yeah.
You walk into a sticky spider web, but you manage to squirm free of it.
You don't end up getting stuck any further on the web.
You hear disappointed clicking noises in the distance.
Disappointed clicking noises?
Yeah, like spiders.
I wonder how a click could sound disappointing.
They're not going to eat well tonight.
Aw.
It's okay.
I'm just muscle.
I wouldn't be very tasty.
That's the best part.
Wait, aren't you 140 pound halfling?
150.
That's all muscle?
I'm just muscle, yeah.
He's chiseled.
Bart got chiseled out of a cliff.
1% body fat.
Gum gum.
Okay.
I will forge a path.
Gum gum.
Flexing his muscles,
showing his strength,
trying to forge a path. Seven. Man. The caves are his muscles, showing his strength, trying to forge a path.
Seven.
Man.
The caves are just too much for you, Gum-Gum.
You bit off more than you can chew.
Your muscles are unable to provide you any insight into what you need to do.
There's only one direction to go to your left, and it is the right path.
That's four right paths.
That's four right paths, making good progress.
And only one monster.
Kyborg.
It seems like the decisions are largely made for you,
but I need you to say them anyway.
Intelligence check.
It's elementary.
It's elementary.
Let's see an intelligence check from the genius Kyborg.
What?
What's in?
11.
11.
Sorry.
Not quite good enough.
I've been told this my entire life.
I'm going to go left.
You go left, and it's a dead end.
So the river is filled with dead ends.
So they get eliminated and we get another monster card added to the deck,
increasing your chances of encountering a monster.
Okay, I need to eliminate two of those checks.
Okay, so we're going to get rid of Forge a Path and Careful Consideration.
Okay, Mud.
It's a good question.
I will scout ahead.
Scouting ahead.
Roll that dexterity check.
Oh, that's a one.
Nope.
No, good.
You're welcome, everybody.
You're unable to gain any insight into what you should do.
But you do have three options, left, straight, or right.
Can I?
Is there?
I'm going to play in the space a little bit and see if you'll let me.
As a badger, I have advantage on wisdom checks that rely on smell.
Could I smell to see which path might smell best to me as the badger?
Oh, that's an interesting thing.
And it is a wisdom-based check.
How fun.
Yeah, we'll say sure.
Okay, so just do a wisdom check? Well, if you
do careful consideration, I'll
give you advantage on that. Oh, okay.
Okay, okay, okay, okay. Because that's a wisdom-based
check. I wish I had thought of that sooner.
It was
blocked out for this turn anyway, but yeah, future turns.
Yeah. I'll go straight.
Let's see what straight is.
Dead end. Dead end, dead end, dead end.
Mud, I think you've been dead ending every time it's your turn haven't you mud yeah i think fletcher did a terrible job of of tunneling
and i'm really going to leave him a bad review on these tunnels these are also maybe not necessarily
tunnels he made he did say he found some of these tunnels and he kind of added on to them for his
living space i'm still i'm still giving him two stars. He inherited these.
Bart.
Hmm.
Intelligence charisma.
You're the only one with plus zero, with zero intelligence.
FYI.
So I have the highest?
Yeah.
All of us have negatives.
Okay.
You are the smartest person in the party, Bart.
With my plus zero.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, let's try that.
Let's do it's elementary.
Make that intelligence check. Oh, please. Oh, no. Nine. No. Okay. Well, let's try that. Let's do it's elementary. Make that intelligence check.
Oh, please.
Oh, no.
Nine.
No.
No.
Not going well for you guys so far.
We're not in the check part.
So you want to go left or you want to go right?
Let's do that left, baby.
That's another dead end.
Kyborg, it's your fault.
That's one star.
This is one star.
Keep it up.
We're going to zero stars there, Fletcher.
Just keep circling.
It doesn't make any sense to you.
Gum Gum.
I will boost morale.
We need it. Gum Gum can sense everyone's kind of down in the dumps,
so Gum Gum's going to do a little dance to try to cheer everyone up.
No, I want to tell him a speech.
Guys, I think we can do this.
We just have to work hard and go through paths.
Let's see if it worked.
It's 11.
No.
It's weird.
He didn't even roll and he failed.
No one's buying it, Gum-Gum.
I'm sorry.
I burrow into the ground to get away from that speech.
I'll go right.
You're right.
The only way to go.
Right path.
Yes.
So the important thing is that you believed in yourself, Gum Gum.
Yeah.
I boosted my own moral.
Morale.
Morale.
Morale.
So you got five right path cards.
And we are eliminating Scout Ahead and Boost Morale.
Kyborg.
Oh, you know I'm going to forge that path.
Forge it.
Forging a path.
Hummin' a, hummin' a, hummin' a that path. Forge it. Forging a path.
I'm going to strength check.
It's 19.
19.
You successfully forge a path,
which adds two additional right path cards to the discard pile from outside the game.
Against my better judgment,
in my normal tradition, I go right.
Because it's the only path available.
It's a trap path.
That's why you never go right. It's a trap path. That's why you never go right.
It's a trap card.
You think you hear footsteps behind you,
and as you turn to check it out,
you accidentally take a step towards a camouflaged bear trap.
Go ahead and make a dexterity save.
19.
19.
Oh, you were able to very quickly pull your foot out from the trap.
It seems like the trap might be old and rusty.
It doesn't quite close all the way.
Well, we have a real trap and it's just trap music.
Then I would be less
opposed.
Mud.
Mud now would like to
carefully consider smelling
the smells. Yes, you'll
get advantage on it with
your badger nose. No?
Mike is just making fun of the fact that I, John,
do not have a sense of smell.
Aww.
Thumbs up.
Brotherly love.
I rolled a 12 and a 8.
Ugh, no.
Even with your badger senses,
you can't smell anything in the paths ahead of you.
Destined not to smell, poor John.
My badger senses aren't tingling.
Let's go right.
The only direction available.
There's another trap.
It's a trap.
Music?
These tunnels suck.
It's a tarp.
Run.
It's a tarp.
You round the corner and walk into a sticky spider web.
Make a dexterity saving throw.
Deck save.
Don't get eaten.
That's only an eight.
Uh-oh.
You squirm around and try to free yourself,
but you end up getting stuck further onto the web.
You hear excited clicking noises in the distance.
Uh-oh.
So when you fail, one monster card is added to the discard pile,
and the current trap card stays in the river until it's disabled by you.
So you're stuck in a spider web.
Oh, poor badger.
It's just flailing around.
No, save the badger.
Does anybody want to try to help the badger out?
I'll try to save him.
Yeah, go ahead and, Bart, since you said it first,
make a dexterity save.
Or dexterity check, I'm sorry.
Dexterity check, okay.
Yeah, to see if you can free him from the sticky spider web.
Got a 19.
Oh, yeah.
You're able to cut him out.
You use your sword and hack at the web, and you're able to free Mudge.
Messer.
Thank you very much.
Bart.
Well, let me see.
So many options to choose from.
There's only one action and one direction available for Bart at the moment.
We've been stuck with two dead ends for the past five turns.
Let's do that.
It's elementary, please.
Rolling my intelligence.
Roll that intelligence check.
Go, Smarty McSmarterson.
Got a 11.
No, not good enough.
God damn.
Bart's trying so hard.
He's closing his eyes so tight and trying to use his brain.
There's no, nothing's coming through.
So the only way you can go is to the right, which is another dead end.
Oh, man.
Which clears all the dead end cards, but it does add a monster card to the pot.
All these monster cards have been adding to the pot.
We still haven't pulled one, which means we're going to pull one this round.
We pulled one.
You pulled one.
Oh, no, but I mean, since we've been adding them to the discard pile, we haven't pulled one. Now that you said that, we We pulled one. You pulled one. Oh, no, but I mean, since we since we've been adding them to the discard
pile, we haven't pulled one. Now that you said that,
we're pulling one. We're going to get rid of
its elementary and careful consideration.
Finally, its elementary is gone.
Well, so is careful consideration
the one you have advantage on. That's fine.
Gum gum. I'm going to forge a bat
this time.
Make that strength check. 25.
Yeah, that's a nat 20.
Easily, Gum Gum's muscles work out,
so adds two additional right path cards
to the discard pile from outside the game.
Which direction do you want to go?
Who's after me?
After you is Kyborg.
I will boost morale again.
Well, you can do that as well.
You just forged a path.
Oh, never mind.
I will go straight. I will go can do that as well. You just forged a path. Oh, never mind. I will go
straight. I will go straight.
There you go. I'm realizing that
determined Gum-Gum just sounds like
Christian Bale's Batman.
No, it sounds... I am the knight.
It sounds like the college
humor impersonation of
parody. Yeah, yeah.
Swear to me. Swear to me.
Where is she? It's a monster. Monster card. Iwear to me. Swear to me. Where is she?
It's a monster.
Monster card.
I told you it was going to come.
Fight.
Fight, fight, fight, fight.
Zubat.
This cave's filled with them.
What kind of monster is it going to be?
Let's see.
A fuzzy little bunny.
You head down a passage that opens up to a large cavern glowing with mushrooms.
To your right, there are three large stair-like ledges with more glowing shrooms and a few boulders.
The path before you snakes around the lowest ledge to what looks like an exit.
I just like that we have two badgers and mushrooms.
Badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger, badger.
Mushroom, mushroom.
Snake!
So, we're in front of a thing that looks like an exit
and a bunch of mushrooms.
Yes, it's a large cavern that's glowing with mushrooms.
And then to your right, there's three ledges
with more glowing mushrooms and a few boulders,
and the path kind of snakes around to the lowest ledge
to what looks like an exit on the other side of the cavern.
Is it my turn, or are we still waiting on Gum-Gum to do a decision?
Yeah.
I thought we had a monster.
I think we have to decide if we're going to go check out this exit.
This is part of that encounter.
Who's going to go check?
Towards the exit?
Yes.
Yeah.
Okay.
We'll go real sneaky.
All right.
We'll go ahead and roll a stealth check.
Eight for Gum Gum.
How long does my thingy last?
Up to an hour.
When was that?
You did that when you were outside?
Yeah, I'll say you're still within the hour.
Okay.
So he's 18.
23 from Kyborg.
19 from Mud.
Oh, 10.
And 20 from Bart.
Y'all are lucky with the pass without trace.
Y'all start walking through the entrance,
heading to the other side of the cavern to the exit
when you see webs get shot out at both exits, sealing them off.
Get me pictures!
Trapping you inside the cavern.
A legion of spindly legs scuttle out from the shadows
at the high edge of the cavern.
A cacophony of clicking and hissing grows louder and louder
until you spot two swarms of spiders slinking out from behind the boulders
with a myriad of eerie eyes fixed on you.
Oh no. Thank you. Sous-titres par LaVacheSquid作曲 李宗盛 Gum, gum, gum, gum
Here comes the sun, gum, gum
Wake up as my lute goes strum strum
Come, come, come, come
Coffee's in your mug now
Time to give the world a hug, hug
Every day is sure fantastic
Cause my friend, you bring the magic. Come, come, come, come
Morning has come, come, come
All your friends are up and waiting.
Gum, gum, it's time to play. you