Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Deja Ürbloom - Ep. 18: Hasta La Vista, Baby-T

Episode Date: September 15, 2021

The Interns press on toward their prehistoric prey, but capturing the Baby-T may take the performance of a lifetime. Follow us on social/check out some merch! https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStinkyDrag...on Support the show,take our survey! https://bit.ly/stinkydragonsurvey Check out Easy Allies over at twitch.tv/EasyAllies, EasyAllies.com, or support them directly at Patreon.com/EasyAllies. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:24 See Kraken.com slash legal slash ca dash pru dash disclaimer for info on Kraken's undertaking to register in Canada. This is a Rooster Teeth production. Good knock, kai teens and cold drifts. Gather your limbs and lurk on in to the stinky dragon for our latest nightcap, the Six-Eye Opener. It's a tangled mess of web walker whiskey shots, a can of monstrosity energy drink, and a pinch of brown sugar. Rain or shine, one sip of this and you'll be able to climb any water spout.
Starting point is 00:01:08 Previously, our adventurers found Hugh Manor, the last glassblower of Urbloom. He felt like bonding over a bonfire of bondage, but Brink bargained for their lives in exchange for the capture of one baby tea. Nainor led them to Razor Ridge in search of a tiny tea wreck, but now it seems the interns are on their own to find the nest. Loosen your legs, drain the dregs, and let's crack this egg. Gum-Gum lowers down to all fours, and ever so slowly, he creeps towards the flamboyant buff. With every inch he gets closer, he hears a and he feels his body slowly swell and blow. Now his hair and skin begin to bleach into a blonde hue. By the time he reaches the rainbow leaves bush,
Starting point is 00:01:56 Gum-Gum's entire body has brightened to a vibrant yellow and in a matter of seconds, he's gained a whopping 50 pounds. Oh my God. What? Gum-Gum's gained a whopping 50 pounds. Oh my god. What? Gum gum's a lemon. Or yellow. Like, I gained 50 pounds in what part
Starting point is 00:02:09 of my body? Like, all around. Like, all over. Yeah, evenly distributed. You just like plumped out a bit. Like Tim Allen's Santa Claus. Yeah. Can I crawl back? Sure. Are you still doing it sneakily? Yeah. Yeah. You can roll back now, my dude. Make a stealth roll if you're doing it sneakily yeah yeah you can roll back now my dude make a stealth roll
Starting point is 00:02:27 if you're doing it sneakily okay could i do some sort of like medicine check on him to see what happened 18 18 yeah he's very very sneaky make a nature check part okay well I only have plus one. All right, 15. 15, that's a good roll. Do you think that that bush up there is a pigment bush, which is said to have transmutational effects on people? Oh, I get it. That's why I snorted. Yeah, look at you. Pigment bush.
Starting point is 00:02:58 Oh, God. We've got a portly little gum gum here. What do we do with this? I'm sorry, I got fat. Bart, based on your knowledge of pigment bushes, you think this will eventually wear off, but it'll take a little while. Okay.
Starting point is 00:03:12 Hey, Gum-Gum, I know you might be feeling and looking a little off, but don't worry, buddy. It'll fade. All right? Just trust your old buddy, Bart. Okay. Your buddy's going to go through some changes.
Starting point is 00:03:22 Yeah. I think you'll look cute. All right, Gum-Gum. Time to stretch it out. We're going to go through some changes. Yeah, I think you'll look cute. All right, Gum Gum. Time to stretch it out. We're going to get some workouts going. We're going to lose that flap, so you're looking fab. Here we go. Push-ups.
Starting point is 00:03:32 Start. One, two, three, four. Kyborg is a bling. What do we do to get past this bush? We're doing burpees now. We're doing burpees. Down. Can I burp? How get past this bush? We're doing burpees now. We're doing burpees. Down. Can I burp?
Starting point is 00:03:47 How big is the bush? It's, I mean, it's fairly decent sized. I will say it's, you know, between five and ten feet around. Okay, so not really like, you can't really jump over it very easily. No, you would not be able to jump over it, but you could, you know, skirt around it and keep it at bay. Moving on to jumping jacks. Here we go. Let's get 25 good
Starting point is 00:04:06 ones oh i'll jump over it do it i'll do it i just want gum gum to go at another pass i have a question is there anything up is there like any overhanging things or anything above this bush no just rain but he did say we could potentially screw around it so maybe we should just try that yeah you think you can keep it at bay. If you stay as far away from it as possible, you think you'll be okay. Okay. Bart's going to try to get around it. And he's pointing to himself going, all right, guys, just follow me.
Starting point is 00:04:35 All right, watch very carefully. What Bart does. Where are you going to go? Could I do like a perception check? Yeah, you can make a perception check with disadvantage because it is dark and rainy. Okay. All right. 12 and 16.
Starting point is 00:04:51 So 12. Yeah, you're not really quite sure what your options are here at this point. It's too difficult to see. Okay. Bicycle crunches, come on! This happened. Oh, I will say with the 12, you do see one option, Bart. You do see a path that goes to the west.
Starting point is 00:05:08 Okay, that looks clear. Or like... Yeah, but when you're looking down that path, you can't seem to shake the feeling like something or someone's watching you. Maybe it's a T-Rex and it's Baby. Shadow boxing. Someone else about to do something? Mud was going to yell at the bush
Starting point is 00:05:25 with his ability to talk to plants. Oh. Oh. Hey, sir, if you could possibly not do what you're doing to us as we pass by, we'd be much appreciated if you could just maybe take a little bit of a chill. I don't know what that means, but I did my best. I'm wondering if I jump in, if it'll make me even more muscular.
Starting point is 00:05:51 Now I'm contemplating jumping into the bush. Well, it worked out great for you last time you jumped into a bush. I mean, you should definitely try it again. All right. I hand Bart. Wait, is Kyborg still tied to the rope to me? I would assume so. Y'all never said you took it off.
Starting point is 00:06:06 Okay. But now you're all fat. I know. Does the rope expand? It's like it's real tight on him, even tighter now. All right, hold on to the rope. I'm going to jump over the bush. No, we said it's too big to jump.
Starting point is 00:06:22 Gum, gum. I have jump ring. I'm not going to hold on to the rope. You do your thing. Well, the rope is still on Kyborg, so it's being held on by somebody. Get as close as you can. Why don't you just hold him?
Starting point is 00:06:35 What is it you hope to do with the rope as you travel over a bush? Gum-Gum doesn't quite understand physics, so he doesn't understand what to do with the rope. But he's going to try and jump over the bush okay go ahead and make an athletics check Gum Gum okay Kyber do what you want with the foot with the rope
Starting point is 00:06:53 are you going to cast that jump thing yeah 23 let's just say that I get one of my weapons sharp edge weapons at the ready just in case slack runs out and I need to cut it before it pulls me in. The rope is fairly long. You're able to traverse the tar pit with it.
Starting point is 00:07:13 Gum Gum, that's a great athletics check. You run up to the bush and jump over it. And as you get close to the bush. Lights on fire and we hear the voice of the Lord. Remember, with my jump spell, I go three times my normal jump. Yes. That's a pretty high jump. Your skin turns from yellow to purple and you gain another 50 pounds.
Starting point is 00:07:32 Good Lord! But you're able to successfully jump over the bush with no problem. And now you're on the other side of the bush. I cannot believe that worked. It worked in air quotes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:46 He's a grape. Baruca salt? Nope, that's a blueberry. We got a grape here. People like grapes. There we go. That's the content we're all looking for. Yeah, look for our official Stinky Dragon merch in the store.
Starting point is 00:08:03 People like grapes. That's official Stinky Dragon merch. We came up with it brand new. Yeah, look for our official Stinky Dragon merch in the store. People like grapes. That's official Stinky Dragon merch. We came up with it brand new. Yeah, right now. Don't be surprised if there's like a ton of people like grapes merch. If you already have it, it means you're a time traveler. Wow, incredible. Okay, I guess we have to get around this bush.
Starting point is 00:08:21 What could we do with the rope? Well, we saw there's a path going west, so I don't know if we want to try to go that way. Can I look around now that I'm on the other side of the bush and see if there's anything? Yeah, make a perception check at disadvantage. Eleven and one.
Starting point is 00:08:39 Good lord. So one. No, you can't see. You're distracted by the newfound fat deposits under your eyes. And his purpleness. Oh my god. Maybe your eyes are like swelling shut.
Starting point is 00:08:54 I'm used to my body changing a lot for different reasons, so I'm just going to go ahead and try a little bit of a turn around the bush. And if what happens, happens. You're going to go up to the bush? No, around it. I'm going to try to go to go around oh okay gotcha gotcha all right like let's say to the left offers himself to the bush yeah i mean you're able to skirt it bart would also did skirt around the bush as well right you did say that right bart i didn't end up going um okay you looked
Starting point is 00:09:18 but i could attempt to now if yeah yeah i mean you you, you both are able to skirt around it just fine. Okay. Did they change? No. Oh. I sucked in my belly. Well, Kyborg is really nervous because he thinks he looks perfect and beautiful.
Starting point is 00:09:34 He doesn't want to change, even if temporary. But he nervously skirts the side of the bush, just like the others did. Okay, y'all reconvene with Gum Gum Gum on the other side of the book. Gum Gum looking a little worse for wear, but no fear. We're going to turn that gut into a cut. Let's do push-ups.
Starting point is 00:09:54 Okay. Okay. Can I, like, muzzle Kyborg? Here we go. Squat in place. Here we go. Looking through my spells if I have anything. A roundhouse kick into Kyborg's mouth.
Starting point is 00:10:11 Crunches. So there was a path that you said that, like maybe to the north, I think, was it, that you said that you... Bart pointed out a path to the west. But he thought there might be somebody watching us. Yeah. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing.
Starting point is 00:10:25 It could just be... A pervert. Maybe someone to keep us safe. You know what? Actually, yeah. I'd be curious who's watching us. Do you want to just take the path? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:35 All right. Let's go down to the west. Okay. Yeah. You all head over to the west. I hear a smirk in Gus's voice, and now I'm nervous. Yeah. It's just the way you all approach every intersection has been different every time.
Starting point is 00:10:48 It's making me laugh. There's no consistency with how you all are approaching it. Do you think there's anything about us that's consistent? The only consistent thing about us is that we're inconsistent, okay? Okay. So you all head off down that path to the west. You enter a four-way intersection hedged in by two large mossy stones and bushes. Another four-way intersection.
Starting point is 00:11:09 You feel the hairs on your neck stand up as you walk along the narrow path. Okay. Uh-oh. In a matter of seconds, three small feathered reptiles leap overhead and surround you from all sides, each of them standing on two clogged feet with tails whipping back and forth and long, narrow jaws snapping and hissing toward you. Everyone go ahead and roll initiative. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:30 Uh, it's friends. If you ask me, they should all be destroyed. 22. Are they protecting its mother? Four. 21. And 10 for Bert. Meta, real quick, are these like,
Starting point is 00:11:43 they're velociraptors, right? Or are they baby T-Rex? Make a nature check. Yeah. Do you know what these are? 16. 17, I mean. Yeah, you believe that these are Velociraptors.
Starting point is 00:11:58 Cool. Just going to write those down. Yes. Just like Muldoon. All right, we're going to have them act last on a three. Are they clever girls or? There it is. All right.
Starting point is 00:12:12 Mud, what do you want to do? You got three raptors surrounding you. Mud is giddy because Mud can now turn into velociraptors. So no matter what happens, we've added that. So Mud's looking at three raptors facing us. Mm-hmm. Hmm. And the terrain is wet and muddy and everything like that?
Starting point is 00:12:31 Mm-hmm. Okay. I wasn't ready for combat. We haven't done combat in a while. I know. You know what Mud wants to do? Mud's going to get everybody on the even footing, and Mud's going to use the Dwarven Stone of Red,
Starting point is 00:12:43 and I cast Darkness, that is also paired with the smell of freshly baked bread, and we're all casting Darkness now. Okay, so you create like a smoky darkness and the smell of freshly baked bread. It was already difficult to see before, but now it's dark. It's near impossible to see at this point.
Starting point is 00:13:02 Yeah, and it's 15 feet in radius. Mm-hmm. All right. Do you center it on the party? Do you center it on... How are you going to do this? Could I... I don't know how the Dwarven Stone of Bread works.
Starting point is 00:13:13 I think it emanates from the Dwarven Stone of Bread, right? Yeah, I think you're right. So it emanates around you and envelops your party in darkness. Could I throw it in the middle of this band of raptors and envelop them instead? Raptors. I would say if you use it, it already emanates. Like, it doesn't continue emanating.
Starting point is 00:13:33 Like, it comes out from where you used it. Well, then I'm going to go a little gutsy. Can I dash forward to these raptors and cast it? Yeah. I mean, they're surrounding you, though. Like I said, they're not all on one side. They're clever girls. So you all walk into their trap.
Starting point is 00:13:52 So they're from three different sides. They're around you. Then, okay. Since now I understand how this item works a little bit better, can I paint a picture of what happened? Yes, please do. All right. Mutt just yells quickly to his teammates,
Starting point is 00:14:05 get an eye on one of them, and then dashes forward in the middle of them all and then envelops them all in darkness, hoping that his team... Like I said, they're all around you, though. You can't envelop all of them. Oh, I thought... Oh, so they came out from different directions?
Starting point is 00:14:18 Right. Oh, okay. Well, I've just wasted everybody's time because I thought they were all, like, together. Jurassic Park? No, they surround you from all sides. Oh. Oh, God. Just cut I've just wasted everybody's time because I thought they were all like together. Jurassic Park? No, they surround you from all sides. Oh. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:14:26 Just cut everything I just said. No worries. That was nasty. I've heard it soon. No, leave it in. It's good to learn. Okay. Well, then I'm just going to go on a completely offensive angle and I'm going to cast Ice
Starting point is 00:14:40 Knife at, let's just have the dealer pick one of them. All right. We'll say the one that would have popped out in front of you guys. Casting it now. 24. 24 to hit. That hits the little turkey-sized feathered dinosaur in front of you guys.
Starting point is 00:14:56 So these are accurate velociraptors, not Jurassic Park ones. Yes, these are not Jurassic Park velociraptors. This is DMD. Yeah. The little turkey takes eight damage. Also, I forgot. Hit or miss, the shard then explodes that I throw,
Starting point is 00:15:10 and the target, each creature within five feet of it, must succeed on dexterity saving throw or take 2d6 cold damage as well. Okay. There's no other creature within five feet of it, but does this cause the target itself to also take damage?
Starting point is 00:15:22 Yep. Another 2d6. Let me make it dexterity saving throw. 15 is the save. And what is its dex? It has plus 2 on this. 16. So it makes it save.
Starting point is 00:15:33 Oh, okay. Boom. It pisses and screams in pain as a knife of ice plunges into it, and it takes 8 points of damage. So that's the one that's in front of you guys. There's two other on either side of you as well. Okay. Kyborg. So to be the one that's in front of you guys. There's two other on either side of you as well. Okay. Kyborg.
Starting point is 00:15:46 So to be clear, they're all scattered. Yes. Like a triangle around us. Farther than 10 feet apart, do you think? Yes. Okay. Well, then I take an aim at the one that Mud just hit. Okay.
Starting point is 00:15:58 And I shoot an arrow at it. Shoot away, my friend. Hiya. Hiya. Ooh. That's a 14. Yeah, that does actually hit. arrow at it. Shoot away, my friend. Heeyah! Heeyah! Ooh, that's a 14. Yeah, that does actually hit. Not a great roll, but you still do manage to connect with the raptor in front of you. Doing eight points
Starting point is 00:16:13 of damage, kyborg hits it in the neck and pops open its jugular vein and the raptor falls to the ground. That was much more graphic than usual. That's so cool. Is it warm or cold-blooded? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:16:30 They gotta be cold-blooded, right? I think, aren't reptiles cold-blooded? But they have feathers. I think people might not know with dinosaurs. Are dinosaurs cold-blooded? Lukewarm. Half and half. Half and half. Half and half.
Starting point is 00:16:46 Low fat or? No, it's like an Arnold Palmer, you know, half tea, half lemonade. But this is half warm, half cold. You sound like Dracula. Bart, the raptor that was in front of you guys is now dead, but you are still flanked on either side by two other raptors. Could I cast cloud of daggers over one of them? Yeah, of course.
Starting point is 00:17:05 All right, let's do that. Which one do you want to do? Let's do the one on the left. Left, the one on the left. So you got spinning daggers in a cube, five feet on each side, and the creature takes 4d4 slashing damage. Is there no save on that?
Starting point is 00:17:21 I don't believe so. Wow, that's OP. All right, go ahead and roll your 4d4 damage. Coming in. We got 14. Good lord. That's a 3, a 3, and a 4. What great rolls.
Starting point is 00:17:36 Bart conjures up spinning daggers that are thicker than the rain that's falling and they encircle the raptor, killing it with hundreds of tiny cuts and that raptor, killing it with hundreds of tiny cuts. That raptor falls to the ground. I had so many Muldoon quotes and I'm so bummed that we're
Starting point is 00:17:51 murdering these things. Quite quickly. You're burning right through it. Bart is killing it. Hey, it's murder or be murdered here, fellas. Great job, Bart. The law of the jungle. Gum Gum, you got one raptor left on the right side. Won't even get a hit in all right I guess I'll
Starting point is 00:18:08 just charge in with my axe and yell for Bart why just for fun he's just doing it for me I guess so and swings at the Raptor with
Starting point is 00:18:23 great axe. All right. Go ahead and make your attack roll. 25. 25. That definitely hits. Gum-Gum connects with his great axe with the raptor. Four Bart.
Starting point is 00:18:34 Doing four Bart. How many points of damage? Nine. Nine points of damage. Gum-Gum solidly connects with the raptor, which hisses at him. It is still alive. That one's for you, Bart. Oh, Gum-Gum, you're a good friend.
Starting point is 00:18:53 And the raptor itself, after hissing at Gum-Gum, it lashes out and bites at him. That is a plus four, 11. I assume that does not hit? Nope. So it tries to bite at Gum-Gum and misses. While Gum-Gum is busy looking at the missed bite, it rears up and claws at him as well. No, Gum-Gum!
Starting point is 00:19:12 For 12. Is 12 a hit? Nope. You're upset. The raptor tries twice to attack at Gum-Gum, but fails on both attempts. I turn to the group and I say, they never attack the same place twice. They were testing the Gum, but fails on both attempts. I turn to the group and I say, they never attacked the same place twice. They were testing the Gum Gum for weaknesses systematically.
Starting point is 00:19:31 They remember. All right, Mug. Just the sound of a very proud DM. There's one remaining raptor. Yeah, it's over there by Gum Gum. And it's been hit. Shoot her. Shoot her. It has gum gum And it's been hit Shoot her Shoot her
Starting point is 00:19:46 It has been hit It has been hit Is there Alright so In character Mud feels bad at this point Cause he does like You know
Starting point is 00:19:55 Little creatures Could Mud Try to approach The raptor And talk it down Um It's her
Starting point is 00:20:03 You could try. Sure, why not? Yeah. Yes, and. Yay. I'm fine with also like, I'll use my bonus action and I'll turn into the raptor,
Starting point is 00:20:13 make it feel a little better. You're in a wild shape into a raptor? Yeah. And I'll just go out to be like, it's like, hey, it's okay. Do you want to just join our party? Maybe instead of attacking us like we are? I know your friends are dead.
Starting point is 00:20:27 You know, let's make lemonade here out of lemons, you know? Shoot her! Nope, I'm trying to talk to her. Talk to her! Shoot her! Communicate with her. Yes, find common ground with her. It seems pretty freaked out and scared that a random raptor that's not part of its pack just appeared in front of it.
Starting point is 00:20:53 Yeah, but it needs it's a pack creature. And so it wants to find a pack. And so I'm offering another pack. Could this be like one of those situations where you're at a party and someone's like hey what's up? And you're like I don't actually know this person but they're acting like they know me so I actually have to be nice to them. Except raptors don't have any sense of like social
Starting point is 00:21:13 awkwardness. Hey there. Hey buddy. It's been a while. Nice to see ya. I'm proficient in animal handling as well. Yeah go ahead and make an animal handling roll. Why not? Okay.
Starting point is 00:21:27 That's 20. 20, okay. Yeah, it looks really confused at you, hisses, and then jumps away and runs back into the jungle. Okay. They show extraordinary intelligence, even problem-solving intelligence.
Starting point is 00:21:42 I was hoping to add a little velociraptor to my party. You got to be careful. It might eat gumbo at some point. They might have developed a taste for gumbo. Or they'll be best friends, like Milo and Otis' little version, huh? Milo couldn't eat Otis. No, but it's dog and cat.
Starting point is 00:21:58 They're not supposed to be friends, but man, were they friends? All right, so you all are in the clearing all alone. You have vanquished the raptors, either through sword or through confusion and social awkwardness Mud used confusion It was super effective. The two things we excel at
Starting point is 00:22:13 Sword and confusion That's our dungeon in Dragon Alright, so yeah, you are in this clearing all on your own We did it It's kind of grotesque, but can I steal All right, so yeah, you are in this clearing all on your own. We did it. It's kind of grotesque, but can I steal a raptor claw from one of us? Yeah, you can.
Starting point is 00:22:33 Oh, that's cool. All right, I make a new one necklace. Can I get one too? Sure. I make claw necklaces for all of us, so we're going to have it. This is a bonding experience, and I share it. These are our friendship bracelets. Oh, yeah, there would be four, wouldn't there? Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:22:45 Can I get enough to make Raptor Claw gloves? No. I'm making you a Claw necklace. Be happy with the Claw necklace. So there would be a Claw on your necklace. So if you wanted to do something else with that, you're more than welcome to go. Oh, okay. I was thinking Tal
Starting point is 00:23:01 when he said Claw. I mean, that's what I was, yeah, it's like, it's a little It's the thing that Dr. Grant carries around, you know? Yeah. The thing that taps on the floor. Oh, but they only each have one on each leg? Right. So there's four total. I think there's two or three. You know when it goes in the kitchen
Starting point is 00:23:18 it just goes... Well, I'm looking at what we're playing by the D&D Raptor not the Jurassic Park Raptor. And it looks like they only have one. You can look around and see which direction we're to go or what's around us. Yeah. Why don't you make me a perception check at disadvantage, Gum-Gum? Do we still feel like we're being watched or was that just the three?
Starting point is 00:23:39 You suspect it was probably these animals. The disadvantage is from the darkness? Yeah. The rain and the general conditions. We're also very scared. Okay. Well, I got a one because I do have seeing in the dark. Gum Gum, you're not able really to discern any paths other than the one you just came up.
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Starting point is 00:27:31 of summer must-tries from the PC Insiders Report Summer Edition. Like our new flake-outs, there are delicious twists on the croissant donut with 24 layers of croissant flakiness twisted with fancy donut fun. Get ready to go all out for less. All right, what do you all want to do? I am a raptor.
Starting point is 00:28:00 And... I am a raptor. I was trying to see if the raptor has any proficiency with perception, but it doesn't seem like that's their forte. I guess, yeah, can we just look around for any signs of a path that seems good? Yeah, make a perception check at disadvantage. Shouldn't we be going north? Isn't that the main direction we should be going?
Starting point is 00:28:23 Probably, although we have gone, we went east one time and then we went west another time. That's right. But didn't... Y'all are all over the place. Didn't Nader say that the nest is north, right? Did he? Yeah. I think he did. I think he might have. I don't know. It says something about Razor Ridge.
Starting point is 00:28:40 I don't know if that's anything to do with where we're going. Let's head north. I thought you were making a perception check. I don't know if that's anything to do with where we're going. Let's head north. I thought you were making a perception check. I was until I remembered that we might have already gotten information we should have been using this entire time. Well, I mean, we could still try to make a perception check. I think the perception check
Starting point is 00:28:55 will still help you to figure out what your options are. Go for it. Yes, let's do that. We're definitely under the 30 minute limit too. 17. At disadvantage. You're at too. 17. 17. At disadvantage. You're at disadvantage.
Starting point is 00:29:08 Caught him. Nope, you are. 17. Ha-ha! Oh, nice. You see several different directions that you could potentially go in from here. There is a north path, and around that bend, you hear muted cries and whimpers. There's an east path,
Starting point is 00:29:26 which is where you came from, and you see that pigment bush down there. There's a south path, where you spot a clothesline that seems to have fallen into that path, and a west path that gives you a chill in the air. Are there people here? What the heck? We went through a camp, there's a clothesline? Uh, alright.
Starting point is 00:29:42 Uh, north seems to be the sounds of something that could be a baby. Yeah, we should probably go rescue where that is. A what? A baby. I just don't want to go to the path that we got to chill from. I'm not a big fan of that. Bart likes to be warm.
Starting point is 00:29:56 He's a fan of the beach. It makes sense if he was a pirate. What's the party doing? Are y'all in agreement that y'all are going north or what's going on here? Sure. Follow the raptor. Yeah. North.
Starting point is 00:30:08 You approach a narrow bend and hear muffled whimpers and cries. They seem to be coming from around the corner. So the bend, is it like rock covers the view or like woods or what? It's like moss-covered stones and bushes. Ooh, could I, um, can I go invisible and creep around to see what's over there?
Starting point is 00:30:30 Yeah. Little scout. Okay, I'm going to cast my invisibility. Bart pops out of existence. It's okay. Come, come. I'm still here. Make a stealth check at advantage because you're invisible.
Starting point is 00:30:42 Okay. We got a 23 and a 20. So, 23. So, Bart's really sneaky, really careful, checking around the bend. Go ahead and also make me a perception check at disadvantage. At disadvantage, okay. Damn it.
Starting point is 00:31:01 All right, 8 and 12. So, I guess I'm 8. Okay. And 12. So I guess an eight. Okay. Bart steps around the corner being super careful. And one of your steps, you step down on the ground. And the ground opens up and swings open below you. Causing you to fall into a pit. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:31:21 The one time I didn't tie a rope. You take two points of falling damage. Then at the bottom of the pit are wooden spikes. No, no. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And you take another 18 points. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:31:38 That was 2d10. I rolled a 10 and an 8. Barret, are you okay there, mate? No. Hold on. What? Barret, are you okay there, mate? Uh, no. Hold on. That's a total of 20 points of damage. I have now three HP left. We also didn't see this.
Starting point is 00:31:54 We just saw a hole appear. Well, it's around the bend. You didn't even see it. Bart went around the bend to look. You didn't actually see Bart fall. I just wanted to peek around the corner. I didn't actually want to walk around the corner. Got to move to peek around.
Starting point is 00:32:08 I just said to peek. Yeah, you got to step up to peek around. Oh, so I guess they would see you then at that point. Well, I was invisible. No, that's what I was saying, it's invisible. They would see the floor open up. That's insane. So we saw a hole.
Starting point is 00:32:21 Yeah, you're right. So Bart, you fall into a little pit there. You get impaled on some spikes, and you see down at the bottom of the pit with you appears to be a scared and impaled baby Triceratops. Triceratops, but not a baby T-Rex. No. Okay. Well, could I take a potion of healing?
Starting point is 00:32:40 Yes. Okay. What is that? That's 2d4 plus 2? I think so. Okay. That's 6 plus 2, so it's 8. What is that? That's 2D4 plus 2? I think so. Okay. That's 6 plus 2, so it's 8 I get back. Look at you, good as new.
Starting point is 00:32:52 Not quite. Still got a giant spike through my throat, apparently. Ew. There's a baby triceratops. Is there any way for me to communicate with them up there? Could they hear me if I would say something loud? Yeah, you think they'd probably be able to hear you. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:09 Are you assuming that you stayed silent your entire travel down the hole? Guys, I'm not feeling good. I would not recommend coming here. Fell down a hole on a distance bike, but there's a little baby triceratops. Gum, gum. The rope. We have the rope. You lower me down. I grab
Starting point is 00:33:28 Bart in the baby triceratops and you carry this back up. Okay. I help. Okay. I lower myself into the hole to go to get Bart. Okay. Yeah, you lower yourself into the hole and you see at the bottom of the pit a bunch of spikes and a slightly injured
Starting point is 00:33:43 Bart and a gravely injured Triceratops that seems to be scared of you, but seems to be too weak to really do anything about it. That's really sad. Can I get them both in one go? Probably not. The Triceratops, even though it is a baby, it is still rather large.
Starting point is 00:33:59 All right, I get Bart first. We take Bart back up. Who's pulling you up? Both of us. I am. Gum Gum and Mud. Am I pulling them both or just Bart? Well, you tell me.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Would Kyborg be able to... Kyborg, are you able to just find somewhere to stand and then tie the rope around Bart? God? Yeah, you can totally do that. All right, I do that. Okay. Please don't leave me down in the hole with this baby stretcher.
Starting point is 00:34:27 Gum Gum, make a strength check with advantage since Mud is helping you. Eight, 23, and 16. Yeah, you're able to pull Bart up, no problem. Bart, you are back on the ground with everyone. Cool, but I'm covered in my own blood. Is Bart still invisible? Yeah, Bart would still be invisible. So do you guys just see
Starting point is 00:34:48 blood dripping? Not even. The rope is just suspended in midair. We didn't find holy water, but we found a holy Bart. Hey! That was really heavy air. Drippy heavy air.
Starting point is 00:35:04 All right, can we untie the rope and send it back down to get the baby? really heavy air. Drippy heavy air. Alright, can we untie the rope and send it back down to get the baby? Sure. Toss it back down there. How are you going to do this, Kyborg? Are you going to tie it around the baby triceratops? Are you going to hold it? What's your plan? With my years of training in the woods,
Starting point is 00:35:20 I've learned to do many things with rope, so I want to fashion kind of like a hammock of sorts. That way it's not just like one thing tugging at its gut. Like a harness. Yeah, kind of a harness of sorts, you know. And then I let it go up first, hoping that they'll remember I'm down here.
Starting point is 00:35:40 All right. Yeah, you're able to fashion a little harness for the baby triceratops. You tie it up and give a little tug so that Gum-Gum starts pulling. Gum-Gum, go ahead and make another strength check at advantage. He drops the baby Cytarotops. It dies. Cytarotops?
Starting point is 00:35:56 Cytarotops. Yeah, it's the D&D version. An 18. 18. Okay, 18. You're fine. Yeah, you've managed to pull the baby triceratops up to the ground out of the pit with you guys. Can I then go, hi, baby triceratops?
Starting point is 00:36:11 And then I use my flower rod and make a flower for it. It doesn't want flowers. Give it food and healing. I was thinking you didn't finish. I make it lavender, which helps it relax and manage stress and anxiety. Give it food. Give it potatoes. Ants and potatoes.
Starting point is 00:36:32 You make it the big lavender flower, you said? I make a lavender flower right in front of it. The triceratops is allergic to lavender. It dies. And it sometimes needs to treat wounds, burns, and even acne. Lavender's good for you. It very weakly reaches out with its mouth and grabs at the flower and starts gnawing on it. There you go, little guy.
Starting point is 00:36:53 And then I give him some of my potatoes. Yeah, it starts eating the potatoes. What else? The potatoes and onions. Yeah. Along with the lavender flower. Well, there's one. This is all really cute. I wish you could see this kyborg. There's? The potatoes and onions. Yeah. Along with the lavender flower. Well, there's one. This is all really cute.
Starting point is 00:37:07 I wish you could see this kyborg. There's four of us up here. I think we've got everybody. We can head off. Perfect timing. I'm going to name him Bum Bum. It's perfect. He still looks too weak to travel, but he is laying down eating the food.
Starting point is 00:37:23 Oh, poor little guy. I lay down with him. Oh, cute. Help! Guys! Alright, so shall we continue forth? I feel like we should take a short rest. You know, maybe a long rest.
Starting point is 00:37:39 30 minutes! My current HP. Wait, where's Gaeborg? I don't know. I've kind of forgotten. I don't hear anything, so he must be okay. My current HP. Wait, where's Kyborg? I don't know. I've kind of forgotten. What happened to Kyborg? I don't hear anything, so he must be okay. Did he die to the velociraptors back there?
Starting point is 00:37:51 Is that what happened? He got eaten. In the hole! Oh, did he fall in the tar? I can't remember. I can't remember either. Who's Kyborg? I'm losing my memory.
Starting point is 00:38:03 I shoot an arrow up into the sky. Oh, that must have been from another Triceratops. Yeah, that hole seems dangerous. There's arrows that come out. Let's stay away from that hole. Okay, how do we rescue him? I guess we put the rope down there. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:20 I'll be honest, Blaine. I thought you were being overly cautious when you were worried that the party was going to leave Kyborg down there, but they did it. Oh, no, I know my party. Let's get him. I'll be honest, Blaine. I thought you were being overly cautious when you were worried that the party was going to leave Kyborg down there. But they did it. Oh, no. I know my party.
Starting point is 00:38:29 Let's get him. Let's go. Y'all toss the rope down there for Kyborg? Yes, of course. GumGum, go ahead and make a strength check at advantage. Twelve. And six. Oh, gosh. The lowest roll for Kyborg.
Starting point is 00:38:43 It's only fitting. I'm going to say GumGum, you know, his extra stout. He's got an extra hundred pounds on him. So, you know, he's able to pull okay, and Kyborg also, you know, can climb up a bit without too much trouble and get out of the pit fine. Kyborg, I want you to meet my second best friend, Bum-Bum. I see you fed it lavender.
Starting point is 00:39:02 And potatoes. Okay. Should we give it a healing potion? Or we can save those for ourselves. But it's a baby. I give it a healing potion. It starts, like, looking around at you guys. So cute.
Starting point is 00:39:17 You give it a healing potion, you said, Gum-Gum? Yeah. Go ahead and roll the healing for that. 2d4 plus 2. Oh, 10. Perfect roll. Oh, look at that. 2d4 plus two. Oh, ten. Perfect roll. Oh, look at that. Four plus four plus two.
Starting point is 00:39:30 The baby Triceratops seems to be a little better. It's not wheezing like it was before. Are you okay, bum bum? It slowly gets up to its feet. Oh, God. And then I cover it with my rat blanket. Does this little guy seem, like, grateful? Yeah, he's just, you know, you really can't tell.
Starting point is 00:39:49 But, yeah, he's looking around at all of you guys. Doesn't seem to be scared like it was before. And then it runs right back into the hole. Can I shoot a bursting arrow? Inspiration die for that. Thank you. Can I shoot a bursting arrow into the hole to cause a possible cave in just so that other animals don't fall into this trap?
Starting point is 00:40:10 You could. I don't think that would burst it in. Just, you know, the ground is so muddy and sturdy. If you leave the trap open, I mean, everyone should see it now. You know, it's already in its activated state. Okay. Are there any, like, colorful flowers or anything that we can mark the edges of the trap, just in case someone comes stumbling through?
Starting point is 00:40:29 I could make some flowers. The pigment plant had pretty colorful flowers. Yeah, I'm not going to touch that. Yeah, gum gum. If you want to, like, plant some flowers around the ring of the thing, that way people can see this more clearly. Yeah, I can do that. Pretty dope.
Starting point is 00:40:47 And then I'll make a big colorful flower at the front of it. Okay. There's a big flower in the middle of the path right next to the trap now. And they all live happily ever after. And then I pet Bum Bum. Nice bike you got. Should we move on? Is this thing
Starting point is 00:41:04 good enough to be left alone, do you think? You think so. Yeah, Bum Bum starts trampling off. No, no, Bum Bum, wait. My rat blanket. Can I try and keep, can I try and get Bum Bum to stay? Yeah, you can try like animal handling, I guess. With advantage because I was feeding him?
Starting point is 00:41:20 You rolled a one. With advantage because I was so nice to it? No, no. Bum Bum seems to be ignoring you as he continues walking down the path back in the direction you all came from. Bye, Bum Bum. Oh, look at his little Bum Bum walk away.
Starting point is 00:41:37 Does it still have my blanket on him? Yeah. You can probably run and grab it if you want. Your rat blanket that you've owned for the past five minutes. Yeah, go and grab the rat blanket. Oh, okay. Yeah, it doesn't seem to notice. I hug him.
Starting point is 00:41:49 Oh, okay. It does notice that. I hug him a little, but I don't like in a mean, not in a frightening way. Like a soft way. Oh, okay. Yeah, it seems to like that, but it keeps walking. Bye-bye, bum-bum. Presumably looking for its parents.
Starting point is 00:42:00 I want to help you. All right. What do you guys want to do? I guess we continue down the path. Yeah. Mudd, why don't you I guess we continue down the path? Yeah. Why don't you make me a perception check at disadvantage? Boom.
Starting point is 00:42:08 Boom. That's 20. 20. It seems to you from here that there's three different paths you could take. There's a north path. That path bends on an incline
Starting point is 00:42:18 around a group of mossy stones and a fallen tree log. Hey! There's an east path where you see a natural trellis of ivy hanging over the path, and there's the west path that you came from that bends southward down the hill. Mud faintly remembers
Starting point is 00:42:32 something about a log, I think, where we're supposed to go, so I think Mud's going to start walking north. How do you remember these things? Do you want to communicate that with the team? No, it's just the Velociraptor just walking north. I think we should be going north.
Starting point is 00:42:48 I don't have the best memory, but I'm pretty certain Aether said something about the Fallen Log and there's one up ahead. Guys, that Velociraptor just said something. Can I have a go? Okay, I want to follow him north as well. Alright, is that a ruin in the party heading north? Yay.
Starting point is 00:43:04 Okay, you pass by the fallen log and mossy stones and enter a small glade hedged in by piles of mossy stones on all sides and a flowing river to its back. In the center of the glade is a large nest hemmed with all kinds of shrubbery and bedded with sand. A tiny pair of red eyes pop out from the nest and a slender tail wags back and forth excited. It's a baby.
Starting point is 00:43:25 Oh my god. Is this the one we need to kill? No. Quiet, all of you. They're approaching the Tyrannosaurus paddock. What? Perfect, perfect. You pass by the fallen log and mossy stones and enter a small glade hedged in by piles of mossy stones on all sides
Starting point is 00:43:48 and a flowing river to its back. In the center of the glade is a large nest hemmed with all sorts of shrubbery embedded with sand. A tiny pair of red eyes pops out from the nest and a slender tail wags back and forth excitedly. Right, who's going to go grab the little baby tea? Is that a Pokemon? Did you remember
Starting point is 00:44:08 to bring your Pokeballs with you? There's actually some Pokemon that look like dinosaurs. What do you fellas think about us taking this little guy as our pet and then just leaving, just abandoning all responsibilities and promises we've made along the way? I think a lot of people would die.
Starting point is 00:44:23 We made promises. We've made along the way. I think a lot of people die we made promises We do need glass we need glass made so I have a hunting trap But I don't want to use it because it might hurt him or her I'm pretty sure that would just just cut off the leg of the little baby Clamp we got him. He said to bring it alive. Did he say anything about it being injured? What's your problem? I don't want to do that, no.
Starting point is 00:44:52 It's a baby. You're like those orcs in Lord of the Rings that want to eat the legs of Merry and Pippin. What about their legs? They don't need those. They don't need them. So how about this? Mud has the ability to transform into animals.
Starting point is 00:45:06 So we transform him into a delicious snack. Okay, this is the second time someone has told me to turn into something that's a snack, and I'm not. But it's a baby. It's just a baby. But if the mom comes around. But it's just a baby. We'll deal with the mom when it comes.
Starting point is 00:45:24 How big is this thing? It's a pretty good size. I'd say like the size of a really large dog. Okay, so like it's potentially, we could potentially carry it, right? I have an idea. Yeah, you could carry it. Okay, I mean, I could just cast sleep on this thing.
Starting point is 00:45:38 I very much want to first hear Gum-Gum's plan. Okay, no, go for it. I'm just saying as a backup plan. It's a great backup. It's a great backup, but we really need to hear what Gum-Gum's plan is Okay, now go for it. I'm just saying as a backup plan. It's a great backup. But we really need to hear what Gum Gum's plan is. If you think that's in the lead, go ahead, Gum Gum. Okay, so I have this hunting trap. What I will do is I can set up
Starting point is 00:45:54 the hunting trap, and then I will go and get caught in the hunting trap. And then the little dinosaur will come out because he'll see me hurt, and he'll see me hurt. And he'll either want to be my friend and help me or eat me. Your thought, just to recap, is that you are going to injure yourself in front of a carnivore
Starting point is 00:46:16 whose instincts are to go after the weak and injured of the pack. You know, I'm kind of okay with this plan. Guys, I think that this might be our strongest plan. We should try this out. Let's kick the tires, light the fires, and get that boy in a trap. But what if he's my friend? Can I also look like a dinosaur?
Starting point is 00:46:34 You just got to tuck in your hands. Okay. Do I have any magic? Like old T-Rex. And that's it. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where'd Gum-Gum go? I was going to tell him to tuck something else. I know. I didn't Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where'd Gum-Gum go? I thought you were going to tell him to tuck something else.
Starting point is 00:46:45 I know. I didn't know where that was going. Where did Gum-Gum go? Where did this tiny T-Rex come from? Wow. I could just act like a dinosaur. I think, doesn't Bart have like a kit? Let me see.
Starting point is 00:47:03 I got a disguise kit. Yeah, can you disguise Gum-Gum as a dinosaur? I can, but will I be allowed to do it is the question. I think that's going to be a roll. Yeah, you can certainly try. There it is. Okay, what would I roll
Starting point is 00:47:19 for that? Let's see. Let me look through here. Disguise kit is deception. Where does arts and crafts lie under the mask? Disguise kit, yeah. If the mom T-Rex comes, then Gum-Gum can take over for the baby. Yeah. Add your proficiency bonus to any tricks you make to make a visual disguise.
Starting point is 00:47:39 There you go. Utility and deception. Yeah, let's see. What else could it be? I'm leaning and deception. Yeah, let's see. What else could it be? I'm leaning towards deception. I mean, that's one of the tags there. Maybe stealth. Or performance?
Starting point is 00:47:53 No, because that's not me performing. Well, that would be on. Would that not be on me? I think it's deception. Deception, yeah. But that would be me, my roles. Because I'm the one doing. But she or he part is making a disguise using the disguise kit.
Starting point is 00:48:09 It's like having a makeup artist put your makeup on for you. You're the clay, she's molding you. All right, Gum-Gum, have a seat in Bart's old little chair right here. Okay, that's a rock. Exactly, yes. Okay. The T-Rex watching you all and the little baby T. He's coming out.
Starting point is 00:48:27 He's like sniffing the air. Should we hide? He's fine, he's fine. He wants to watch. Bart pulls out one of those little like cloth robe things that you get at the hairdresser that goes around you. Yeah. All right, here we go.
Starting point is 00:48:44 A little bit of dash of that, a little bit of powder there, and an 18. Yeah, not bad. Pretty good. Bart, in a flurry of hand motions, whips together a little disguise and transforms Gum-Gum
Starting point is 00:48:55 into some kind of hybrid humanoid dinosaur-looking creature. The role he was meant to play. It's up to Gum-Gum to perform the part. I've been watching the whole time to learn its movements. Oh. Okay, someone
Starting point is 00:49:11 go set my trap. So you're going to also pretend to be another baby team. Yes. Yeah, I'm the baby. Someone go set my trap. Alright, guys, I'll go do it. Yeah, Kaibar, go do it. Okay, alright. I set it up and I make it real strong, real tight. That way, Gum-Gum can really method act, you know?
Starting point is 00:49:33 Let me look this trap up. Where is it? It's in your inventory, right? It's in my inventory. Punching trap, there it is. So it's a sawtooth steel ring that snaps shut when a creature steps on a pressure plate in the center. It's like the kind you see in cartoons, right?
Starting point is 00:49:45 Like a bear trap. It's affixed by a heavy chain to an immobile object. I guess you guys don't have to do that because you're not actually trying to trap anyone. A creature that steps on the plate must succeed on a... Okay, you're going to get caught on purpose. You're going to take 1d4 piercing damage and stop moving.
Starting point is 00:50:02 That's not bad. What if I had like cloth, you know, clothes or like a bedroll? Can I like wrap the teeth in that to reduce the damage? That's a strangely kind of kyborg. Well, I don't want my freaking teammate to lose his leg.
Starting point is 00:50:17 Or we could wrap my leg. As a man who has lost an arm myself, I know the importance of keeping your limbs. So I want to want to like, you know, maybe wrap it up in rope and just pad the teeth a lot. Yeah, you could actually, you could totally do that. Okay. Micah just made a joke. He said nub nub.
Starting point is 00:50:40 Nub nub. Perfect. Yeah, you could, what would you pad it with? Like maybe your bedroll or just like various stuff that you have your cave around with you? Yeah, but bedroll, sure. Okay. So Kyborg pads the trap and then sets it, I assume, so that way it doesn't spring on him. So there is now a padded hunter's trap.
Starting point is 00:51:00 Where do you put it? Like on the edge of the little clearing or the small glade? Right where it's an the edge of the little clearing? Or the small glade? Right where it's an eyeline of the dinosaur, but like I kind of do a poor job of concealing it, I guess, you know? Like I'm like, oh, really setting it. And you put some food there, right?
Starting point is 00:51:16 Uh, yes. I put some rations there, yes. Okay. Good lord, I have 20 pounds of rations? That's so much food The baby tea smells that and is inching a little closer Now I assume I'm not wearing any clothes
Starting point is 00:51:31 Oh god Why would you not be wearing any clothes? Well, so that my skin color was closer to the Dinosaurs don't wear clothes You are correct, dinosaurs do not wear clothes You are right yeah but the baby T-Rex who knows what it's
Starting point is 00:51:48 wearing maybe he's wearing a little diapy I'm just trying to get you know okay and so I jump method acting guys method acting this is the Daniel Day Lewis of the uh another realm or whatever is the
Starting point is 00:52:04 Daniel Day Lewis ofewis of the Netherrealm or whatever. Gum-Gum is the Daniel Day-Lewis of Dungeons and Dragons. Yes. So Gum-Gum, you are in the clearing now? Where'd Gum-Gum go? Micah's calling you Dino Day-Lewis. Nice.
Starting point is 00:52:22 And so I go and I'm like and I go and and I'm like... And I go, and I kind of friendly kind of bounce up towards the thing. Once Gum-Gum enters the clearing, the baby tea scrambles back into cover. You can still see its eyes peering out, but it's now in a little hiding spot. I shepherd Bart in mud to some bushes where it's like, let him perform. Okay.
Starting point is 00:52:48 Alright. Okay, what are you doing, Gum-Gum? Exactly. Make me proud, little boy. Well, I kind of, I look, you know, kind of like peer down and I'm like looking sadly at where it ran away. And being like, because I've been my friend, you know,
Starting point is 00:53:03 I'm trying to like, I'm trying to make,. I'm trying to connect with it. And then I kind of hop around kind of a little closer. And then I look back and I see the hunting trap. And I'm like, and then I go, and then I run and I sniff. I sniff. And I perk up and I look over at, God. I sniff. And I perk up, and I look over at the rock where it was. I'm like...
Starting point is 00:53:28 This school play is running on very long. I like the narration, too. Go ahead and make a performance check to see how your performance is so far up to this point. It's a three. That's a three. That's a three. So not very good.
Starting point is 00:53:44 But then I step on the trap. So what are we actually seeing then? If his performance is a three? We're seeing a grown man act like a dinosaur. No, no, 15-year-old boy. 15-year-old boy. And he looks like a dinosaur. Let's just say a disguise kit was very well put on.
Starting point is 00:54:01 And he's naked. That's right. We're watching a 15-year-old boy naked, especially as a dinosaur. The costume is fantastic, but the performance is lacking. Everyone's a critic. It's about to get a lot better once that trap goes off. It's going to get real convincing.
Starting point is 00:54:18 And then I step on the trap. Okay. What do you do once it clamps on your leg? Well, it hurts, right? Do I need to roll the damage? Yeah, let's say I'll roll it. You take two points of damage as the trap clamps down on you, but it's padded, so that's why you don't
Starting point is 00:54:33 take as much damage. Oh, wow. I thought that was someone's dog for a second. Make one more performance check for your scream of pain as the trap closes on you. I think he gets advantage, right? Because, I mean, that's really pain.
Starting point is 00:54:49 But he has to act like a dinosaur that's hurt, not like a gum gum that's hurt. So that's where the performance comes in. All right. That was a nine. It really did hurt, though. That's pretty good. That's how I scream anyway. I would just say.
Starting point is 00:55:02 It's true. Okay, yeah. The T-Rex, like, its snout and its head pop out a little bit from its hiding hole, and it's looking at you, and you can see it sniffing the air. I'm just waiting for Gus to be like, hearing its baby in pain,
Starting point is 00:55:14 the mother T-Rex arrives with the father T-Rex. Oh, God. And I'm like, and I'm making, like, and I try and move, but my leg is all caught. And I'm looking at the T-Rex, trying to ask for help with my eyes.
Starting point is 00:55:37 Bart, go ahead and make me a perception check. All right. I could perceive that Gum-Gum is being an idiot. 18. 18. You think you see the hedge and some of the shrubbery just off to the side of the T-Rex moving, and out from the bushes jumps Nader,
Starting point is 00:55:57 and he jumps on top of the baby T. Uh-oh. Oh, wow. This is the person who was guiding us, right? Yes, correct. Okay. Ralph Nader. It seems like he pokes the baby tea with something
Starting point is 00:56:09 and the baby tea falls to the ground. I like how we weren't getting anything done in capturing this T-Rex that you made the person who was with us do it. No, I mean, technically Gum-Gum got the baby tea to come back out, right? Yeah. All right.
Starting point is 00:56:25 Nader addresses you all and says, If you think I'm going to let you waltz on in and take all the credit for my years of hunting down this scaly devil, then you're gravely mistaken. All right. Well, I mean, we're all helping each other here, buddy. Don't worry about it. You know, we'll give you partial credit.
Starting point is 00:56:42 Yeah. Insecure much? Nader only looks out for Nader. You guys are on your own. Good luck getting back to the camp. What? So he just like sedated the T-Rex and then took off? He's still there standing in the clearing
Starting point is 00:56:55 with the limp baby T. No, that's not how this is going to work out. I cast Entangle on Nader. Cool. And I growl. You still in character, Gum yeah yeah mud starts chanting some spells under his breath and you all see the weeds and vines growing at a crazy rate a 20 foot square around nadir it's like really growing wild wrapping themselves around everything in the area nadir must make a strength saving throw or be restrained.
Starting point is 00:57:25 Can you go punch Nader, just knock him out, take the T-Rex back? Hit him in the Nader's? Yeah. What is the DC on it, did I say? 15. The vines and everything kind of overgrow, grabbing him by the legs.
Starting point is 00:57:39 He's like really struggling to move in it. Kaiborg, get. Okay, I walk over to Nader. I want to unarm strike and then take the T-Rex. really struggling to move in it. Kyborg, get. Okay. I walk over to Nader. I want to unarm strike and then take the T-Rex. Okay, you move at half speed in difficult terrain. Okay. I still got pretty decent speed.
Starting point is 00:57:55 35. In a single turn, you'd be able to move 15, unless you double move and you can do 30. How far away is he? He's on the other side of the glade. I mean, it's probably, you know, 40, 50 feet. Math, am I right? You know, I just want to go take the T-Rex and punch this guy in his face. Even if you double move, you'll be able to get most of the way to him. But, you know, you're having to cut through vines and overgrowth to be able to navigate to get to him as well.
Starting point is 00:58:20 So you can start moving in that direction for sure. Sure. Let's do that. get to him as well. So you can start moving in that direction for sure. Sure. Let's do that. Oh, unless is there a tree over him? Because then I could throw a rope on it, swing in, you know, real brave, and then nap the wreck out
Starting point is 00:58:34 of his hands and he can't move. No, it was cleared out. It's like, it's obviously like a little nesting area. Yes, and I would like to just... Fine, I'll just go for the T-Rex and just beat this guy. Anybody else want to do anything? I guess Gum-Gum's still in character.
Starting point is 00:58:50 Bart? I want to... And be like, look back at Bart to help me. I don't speak dinosaur, so I don't really know what to... He's still in character. He is also naked. I just see Gum-Gum growling at me and I just nod and I go, you're doing great, buddy.
Starting point is 00:59:07 Keep it up. We all need a friend like Bart who's just like constantly reassuring, telling us we're doing a good job. How far is Gum-Gum from Mud? I don't know. We were never clear. I guess you, you know, he was in, what did you say? You were like on the edge of the clearing and then the rest of the party
Starting point is 00:59:24 moved away a little bit into some shrubs. i don't know probably not that far 20 feet or so maybe okay but i'll go over and help with the trap oh i yell out to to gum come if you need help just clap your hands i can't like my hands are they're too small He can't get out of character. I guess he's good. No help required. So at this point, Mud is heading over to Gum-Gum to help him. Bart is waiting for Gum-Gum to clap. Gum-Gum is still acting like a dinosaur,
Starting point is 00:59:57 and Kyborg is making his way over to Nader and the baby T. He's making his way through the difficult terrain. Yep. Out from the shrubs, you see a dagger get tossed over to Nader and the baby T, he's making his way through the difficult terrain. Yep. Out from the shrubs, you see a dagger get tossed over to Nader, who then slashes at the vines, picks up the baby T, and makes a break for it back into the shrubs. As he's disengaging, running away, he shouts at you all, Don't worry, I'm sure the mama T-Rex will be back any minute to keep you company.
Starting point is 01:00:25 This is bad. You're not going to let me do it, but I want to make a called shot. I want to shoot his Achilles tendon. A called shot? Uh-huh. Did you look up the rules for called shots? It's a disadvantage, right? I don't know what that is. A called shot is a mechanic from D&D Edition 3.5.
Starting point is 01:00:40 It's an attack that a player makes that aims for a specific part of the target's body. Since it's aiming for a specific body part and not just attacking the enemy in general, it makes the attack a little more difficult. He's a baller, shot caller. Thank you. Nice.
Starting point is 01:01:02 Okay, so you have disadvantage on hitting him, and he has plus two AC for the called shot. Okay. Well, that was an 11. And... No, no. 21. So it's an 11. Just, yeah, just to be clear, called shots are not officially in fifth edition.
Starting point is 01:01:13 I just looked up like a variant of mechanic that a lot of people use. Kyborg attempts to take a called shot, but unfortunately it misses the target entirely and flies off into the night. What's going to happen? What exactly is Nader doing with the baby tea? I think people are going to
Starting point is 01:01:26 have to find out in the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. Of course, I want to remind you all once again, we're conducting this survey to get information about your listening habits
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Starting point is 01:01:54 unless, unless you follow Stinky Dragon Pod on social media, in which case we can talk to you real soon. Oh, very true. Cut, or should we keep rolling? But I want to do a post-credits scene. I want to do a post-credits scene.
Starting point is 01:02:10 You don't get to make a post-credits scene. No, no, no, no, no. I get to do a post-credits scene right now. Everybody keep rolling. Go. The floor is yours, Blaine. I'm trying to think. You didn't have anything planned.
Starting point is 01:02:23 No, no, no. There's something. Oh, in a distant cave. Quadrant senses a disturbance in the forest. Quadrant's the guy that took away my arm and killed my hand. Nope. This ain't going in. Kyborg's alive.
Starting point is 01:02:38 So what's going to happen with Quadrant? Tune in next episode.

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