Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Of Life & Breath - Ep. 72 - Young at Bart
Episode Date: November 23, 2022Our Adventurer's meet up with some old friends to formulate a two-pronged plan of action to kick off Arc 7 in the Infinight Saga- Of Life & Breath! Go to http://auraframes.com/tales to get up to $50... off Aura’s best-selling Carver Mat frames. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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This is a Ro in my booze. It's a mixture of basilisky and bourbon,
bite berry bitters topped with lunging lime liqueur. One sip of this serpentine sauce,
you'll be slicker than a flying snake oil salesman. Previously, our adventurers met a
lucid Lord Lomish, sprinkled salt across Swampland and boated back to Boulderay.
But the entire town was draped in darkness
and subjugated by shadowy assassins.
Now it seems Inku, the queen of the Shadowmane, has invited the Infinites to Tatora and teased
to Bart that his parents are trapped in the Shadowmane.
Cobble a cocktail, let's fall back into this fragrant fable.
Inku sounds like a Ghibli villain.
Like we're about to enter like a Ghibli type.
Ghibli?
Ghibli? Can it go both ways?
I've heard it both ways.
There's one that's right, though.
I just don't know which one it is.
I've been to the Ghibli museum.
Ghibli.
Just say that.
Did you have a chance with Dijonese
while you were there? That's a separate conversation
for a separate time, but Dijonese does
sound right. No, it does not. Dijonese.
Dijonese sounds so dumb. You just made that up.
Okay, so we're good is what I'm
gathering here. They both sound like names of a dog breed.
It does. They do.
We pick up our story with Bart.
Hello. But not where we last saw him
What?
Flashback! Bart, roll a perception check
Okay, perceiving
with my eyes
18
It feels like you're snuggled up in a nice
warm blanket. You open up your eyes
and you see rays of sunshine
cascading through a nearby window. You notice
your body is shorter and less dense than
usual, and your surroundings don't
look like boulder rays.
You're in a
long, colorful room lined with small beds.
Is this the orphanage you grew up in?
You spot several windows around
the room offering an idyllic view of a wooded
pasture outside, and you see a single door
at the southern end of the room.
Bart's about to sing The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow.
Could I go towards that door?
It's our nightlife.
I'm at tomorrow.
There it is.
Yeah, you walk up to the door and it appears to be unlocked.
And as you're approaching the door, you hear
the sound of a baby crying and
fussing. If you need sound effects for that, by the
way, I could do a baby crying. Let's get some Foley.
Oh, she's good at that.
That's I.
I hate it. There you go.
That's for you, Micah. We're so good at that.
Tessa's ovaries have dried up.
You hear that.
And then I realize it's coming from me.
Where do I hear the baby
coming from? It's somewhere on the other side
of the door. You can't tell. Okay. Let's go
through the door. Yeah, the door's unlocked.
It opens up. It leads out into a hallway. And I kick it
gently. You stub
your toe. You take one point of damage.
No, no, no. You don't. It's past damage.
It's past damage. damage yeah you open up the
door and you're able to pinpoint the sound a lot more precisely it seems like the crying's coming
from the next room over all right and it's just there's also a closed door there okay could i
just quickly perceive if there's anything in this room that would give me like context for what's
going on in the room that you are currently in you're currently uh that's what you rolled the
perception check for that's where you saw the windows and the little beds and everything.
Well, let's keep following the crying.
Yeah.
I assume you want to open this door?
Yes, please.
Okay.
This door is also unlocked.
It opens up to a long room filled with tree stump cribs.
Oddly enough, they don't look like they're constructed.
It looks like it's natural.
Very cute.
Every other crib seems to have a baby humanoid or creature sleeping soundly inside.
And way at the far northern end of the room is where the crying is coming from.
Let's go to the far northern end of the room.
You get closer and you see that the crying seems to be coming from a crying baby half-orc with green skin and patchy black hair.
It's horrifying. It's the ugliest thing you've ever seen in your whole life.
He's wearing a pointed hat that doesn't fit his head, and he looks like he's distraught.
Do I see if there is a name anywhere by the bed?
No.
Okay. Well, I have a theory, obviously, of who this is.
But let's find out. Let's find out.
Sorry, you said he was crying, has a wearing hat.
Yeah, it's like a pointed hat that seems to be much too big for him.
Okay, can I pick him up?
Yeah, why not?
Let's make a strength check.
You are pretty small.
Am I smaller than the baby?
That's where Bart drops the baby and then explains a lot.
13?
Yeah, he's very heavy for you, but you're able to pick him up.
Make a perception check.
Ooh, 10.
As you pick him up and you're struggling to hold him, it looks like he's looking past you at the ground.
Oh, let me look down.
What's on the ground?
On the ground, you see a long, thick rock that he seems to be reaching towards.
Bumba.
Let me pick it up and hand it to the little baby.
Sure.
What would the baby do here?
Yeah, what would this mysterious baby do in this situation?
Are you asking the group?
I think someone in particular.
Put the wand in his mouth.
It's not a wand.
The rock.
Put the rock in his mouth.
That's cute.
What do you think about that, Bart?
I let it happen because Bart knows nothing about how to properly parent a baby.
So he just goes, yeah, that seems appropriate.
Well, he seems like the crying subsided once you gave him the rock and he now has it firmly in his mouth for some reason.
I just I pull it out for just a second to make sure it's not hurting his teeth.
If he has teeth. I don't know.
Oh, no, he's still his mouth is just has gum gums in it.
Oh, perfect.
I don't know.
Oh, no, he's still, his mouth just has gum gums in it.
Oh, perfect.
Just gum gums.
Okay.
I kind of like gently pat him on the head and I go, good crying, baby.
Thank you for not crying anymore.
Do you start crying again, Gum Gum?
Maybe a cry of happiness.
What does that sound like? But he's crying.
You should soothe the baby.
I thought he is being soothed.
I shove the rock back in his mouth.
Yeah, you put the rock back in his mouth.
And as you do that, you know, his hat slips down and you see a little slip of paper tucked into the brim.
Let me take the paper out and see what's on it.
Yeah, you pull the paper out and it says gum gum.
Ah, gum gum.
I feel like that's a fitting name because that's all you're going to have after sucking on this rock for the next couple of years.
Going to need some braces, braces.
Yeah.
Make me, actually make me a, let's call another perception check.
Ah, yes.
Twenty five.
You see nearby on one of the windowsills that there's a toy recorder that's been left out.
It's similar to the one that you've been practicing with in your free time.
All right, let's go investigate this thing.
I put the, make sure the baby's in the crib, not about to fall out.
Yeah, the cribs are very specifically molded so that they hold the baby very securely.
I want to go check out this recorder.
Yeah, it seems like it's a cheaply made recorder that's stamped out,
probably made, you know, in large batches for use by children to learn how to play instruments.
You don't know if you've ever used this particular one.
You know that there's a bunch around the orphanage.
But, you know, Gum-Gum looks like he's getting pretty sleepy.
Do you think maybe you want to play him a song or a lullaby or anything?
Yeah. What time of day
is it? It's afternoon. Okay.
I guess babies do take
naps. So yeah, let me play him
a little ditty on this recorder.
I'll cross buns, I assume, because that's
every kid learns.
Gum, gum,
gum, gum. There goes
the sun. Gum, gum.
Fall asleep. Gum, gum. I goes the sun. Gum, gum. Fall asleep.
Gum, gum.
Never heard a baby snore.
This is the first song that Bart's ever written and sung to someone else.
It's a Bart original.
Original.
As you are singing the song and Gum Gum begins creepily snoring for some reason,
a small budding flower begins to slowly grow out of the crib.
Its petals form the shape of a heart.
Aww.
And Bart goes, wow, is that for me?
Bart, you rub your eyes because you can't believe what you're seeing.
And then you wake up.
You see you're lying at the bottom bunk of your bed in your shared quarters with Gum-Gum at the Infinite Headquarters.
What?
Uh, Gum-Gum, I just, I just remembered the first time we met.
Well, Gum-Gum's not in here at the moment, but-
Nevermind, I'm talking to myself again.
You do sit up in bed and see everything is as it should be.
The sectional, the big screen televisage, a mural of you as a prince, and GumGum's table
of magical artifacts and maps.
Oh man, I forgot that we made this room.
And of course the little performer area of the room right a little stage
okay excellent exactly as you left it yes because we haven't been back
y'all have been busy so is this present day yeah you think so the memories start coming back to
you you remember encountering the inkoo and the shadrow just yesterday you feel like it's the day
after okay in fact all of you are waking up it's morning it's the day after. Okay. In fact, all of you are waking up. It's morning. It's the day after.
You all are in your respective
rooms at the headquarters.
Long rest.
No, not Gum-Gum. He's not there. Gum-Gum,
you're outside. I didn't see anything.
You woke up early. I woke up early?
Yeah. So we're back at the headquarters.
Yeah. I guess this place is not
like, shrouded in darkness? Well, didn't we take
care of those guys at the end of the last one? No, we
got captured. I think the darkness still exists,
does it not? No, the darkness is now
gone. You remember that after
giving you their ultimatum, the
Shadrow disappeared, and
the darkness disappeared with them.
Actually, everyone go ahead and make a perception check.
You got it.
Me too? Everyone. Yeah, yeah, sorry.
Everyone. I rolled a 15.
Eight.
21.
19.
Okay.
It's because Gum-Gum's outside.
Yeah, Gum-Gum, the reason you're outside
is the source of what everyone else is hearing at this point.
Everyone hears the sounds of, like,
banging of hammers and wood and saws,
and it sounds like construction is going on.
It's what stirred you from your sleep, Gum Gum.
I heard dang bangs.
Mud casts
the dwarven stone of bread
and casts darkness and goes back to bed.
You have darkness?
I have that bread thing.
That casts darkness
in like an area.
And yeah, it's just an item I have.
It also makes the smell of bread emanate
wherever it is everyone smells fresh baked bread emanating from mud's room good i just farted i
needed something to mask it um could i go looking for gum gum sure uh you open up the door to your
quarters and there's you know remember there's that common room where all the quarters branch
off of and gum that's where gum gum is standing so yeah you'll find it pretty quick gum gum i just
had the the craziest dream.
I remembered the first time we met. Yeah, but
what was it? I don't remember.
You probably don't remember because you were very small
but it was at the orphanage.
Yeah. And I
made sure you had your boomba so you could fall back
asleep. That's nice. You still do that.
And you still suck on it.
Gum Gum has the
boomba in his mouth when you come out.
His teeth are just really ragged.
Kyborg comes out and then he says,
has anybody seen Dr. Ahem or any other Boulderians around?
You all have not seen Dr. Ahem since the previous day.
Since the previous day.
Mud gets up and goes towards
the noise that he's hearing outside and investigates
what's making all that noise. Mud's awake now.
Because no one has addressed it and Mud's
upset he's not sleeping, so he goes outside.
A very cranky Mud
shoves his way past you. Mud!
Oh, that racket! Who's
hammering this early in the morning?
In my swamp!
That's about the same
as a trick show. Well, you make your way up in the morning. In my swamp. That's about the same. You're a trick show.
Well, you make your way up to the ground.
I think just yelling Scottishness now just sounds like Mike Myers.
You make your way up to the ground floor and head outside to find Boulderey in shambles.
You see Dr. Ahem and Meld are talking to each other right outside the headquarters.
You see them both nod and Dr. Ahem says,
Then it's settled. We'll get started right away.
And he turns to Siwa.
Ah, perfect timing. Good morning, Infinites.
As you can see, Hinku's assassins, the Shadrow, left us in quite the wake of destruction.
Fortunately, Mayor Brink is leading the charge and repairs with his construction company.
What a good guy.
Yeah, what a solid guy.
Wait, wait, wait.
Real friend to the Infinites.
Stop that.
Stop that.
He has a construction company and he's the mayor.
He's profiting while still in office.
We should hold him accountable.
Impeach Frank Dessler!
He got elected on the platform of building the Boulder Way.
Remember the Boulder Way?
I didn't realize I was voting for him.
The Boulder Way.
This big infrastructure improvement platform. I didn't know that he was state. boulder aliens wanted this but i didn't know that he owned the construction
company he made it very clear in his campaign brink doesn't know this but uh kyborg actually
has a head of cabbage in his room that he thinks will last longer than right it's a british
politics joke well thank you for pointing it out uh mel in. Yes, we're very lucky no one was seriously injured.
But I'm afraid there is more bad news.
Just before you all arrived yesterday.
Tell us the good news first.
I didn't say there wasn't any good news.
Just make up good news right now.
Go, go, go.
The good news is that no one was seriously injured.
Oh.
All right, tell us the bad news, Doctor.
Meld.
The bad news is just before you all arrived yesterday,
I received a report from Meld Beta back in Urbloom via the sending stone.
Hugh Manor, my father, has escaped from his prison cell.
Did he not get eaten?
I thought he was dead.
Remember, there was a separate timeline with Meld.
That's why she said she was talking to Meld Beta.
What happened to the T-Rex? T-Rex was in a separate was talking to Meld Beta. What happened to the T-Rex?
T-Rex was in a separate timeline.
Correct.
Oh, no.
They killed the T-Rex.
They're extinct.
Well, for many years now.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
But shockingly, my father, Hugh Maynard, has escaped from his prison cell.
But evidently, he didn't break out, per se.
The guards just said he vanished into thin air.
He break out.
Vanished.
Dr. Ahem continues.
Yes, yes, that's most distressing.
Therefore, with the attack on the town,
the looming threat of Enku,
and Hugh Manor on the loose,
I have called for assistance from friends across Phaser.
And that's where you all come in. Are we not
your friends? Of course we're friends, Bart.
But we need help.
Oh. And that's why I
have jobs for you. Wait, are there
Infinites, but from, like, other
areas? Like, other versions of Infinites?
Well, there's the other gods,
but surely you don't want to
call them. No. Are they good?
No, we fought them.
So yeah, Dr. Ahem starts addressing each of you individually.
Guy Borg?
The most handsome of the group.
Yes, go ahead.
I need you to head to the southern gate
and offer reception to a much needed friend
and help Brink with some repairs around town.
I'm a receptionist now and I'm helping Brink. It's a very
special VIP.
Whose help we need? I'm a bodyguard.
So we're sending our most charismatic
individual to go meet
No, no, no. He's saying I'm a bodyguard.
Is this right? No, you're a reception. You're
receiving someone new. Tell me I'm a bodyguard
and I'll do it. You are welcoming them to
Oh, good God.
Can you sing a Whitney Houston song for me?
He did not get that reference at all.
There's a blank look on Blaine's face.
I think he's just trying to think of a Whitney Houston song.
How about...
There it is.
Mikey, you can keep that in.
There's no way we'll get copyright on that.
We'll deal with these one at a time.
Sure, Kaipo.
You're a bodyguard.
Yes.
Okay, cool.
Cool.
I accept.
And I noticed that Dr. Ahem rolls his eyes as he says that.
All right.
So I assume you rushed down to the southern gate to guard some bodies?
I wanted to hear what everybody else is doing.
We're going to do these one at a time. Okay. Go do your job. Fine. Fine. I wanted to hear what everybody else is doing. The only way to do these is one at a time.
Okay. Go do your job. Fine.
Fine. I leave. I kick him on the butt.
You dodge it?
Yes. Let's go.
Dexterity? Just roll a d20, add your proficiency and
your strength modifier. Is this a saving throw that I'm making?
Just a dexterity check.
18. I think mud gets you. 20.
Yeah. Mud kicks your butt.
Yes!
Literally.
All right, yeah.
You, with a little extra speed, courtesy of mud, you make your way down to the southern gate and find it closed in front of you.
Oh, oh, so we're just continuing on with me for a bit.
Yes.
I keep saying this.
Slide a hand.
Door.
Slide a hand.
No, no.
I open the door. There you go. You open the gate. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, who says, Smarsh, help. Yes, Smarsh, we got to protect someone.
We're bodyguards now.
Maybe you're protecting Smarsh.
Wait, are you?
Do I protect you, Smarsh?
I'm just going to point out, guys, he didn't hear a single thing you said.
Apparently not.
Apparently not.
He didn't hear it.
All he heard was you said something, and he yelled, do I get to be a bodyguard?
And that's all that's gone through his little head.
Who are you talking about?
Brink walks up to you and says, oh, good.
You found each other.
Make yourself useful and help get some lumber for the boulder ray repairs.
I'll do it.
But it's only because I get to hang out with Smarsh and I want to bond with him.
Not because he told me to, Brink Tussler.
Smarsh, help.
Yeah.
All right.
That's the spirit. Okay, I
mount Smarsh, and then we go off to
get wood. Yeah, how do you think, how would
you and Smarsh best accomplish
that, do you think? Uh, gathering lumber?
Yeah. Is it already cut, or do we need to
do it ourselves? No, you gotta do it yourself.
You gotta go out to the woods, uh, to the
southwest, and, um, cut some trees
down. Smarsh is like,
well, he's subterranean, so I think he could
just go beneath and cut the roots
and then the trees would fall over.
Yeah. Yeah. And then
he'll do that and then
that's it. What are you gonna do
to help? Yeah, then how are you gonna gather them up?
Then it's like, we got a bunch of trees falling over.
Shoot, let me look
at my skills. I have
a guess
how are you whispering into his headphones
something about binding together is all I heard on that
it was like out of a cartoon like that
binding together
no But then you have binding together. Pepsi.
No.
Yeah.
I like grasping arrow and I got rope.
I could like probably.
I also got seeking arrow.
You like shoot an arrow and like gather them up and let Smarsh pull them or something.
Yeah.
Maybe I shoot. Okay.
So I establish a zone in which we're
going to take down the trees in
said zone. First of all,
I go around, I knock on each tree,
right? I'm yelling, I'm making sure all the squirrels
and all the birds are out.
And I want to make sure that
Fred didn't get out
and that Dr. M has been taking
care of him. Yeah, yeah. Okay. That would have
been established. They're in the stable.
Once we make a bunch of hooting and hollering and clearing out all the little wildlifes,
then I go and I check to make sure there's any bird's nests.
And if there are, I, by hand, relocate them to other trees.
Make a perception check.
Perception check.
That is 18.
Oh, yeah.
I was hoping you rolled a one. I was going to tell you there were no birds in this
forest. Yeah, you find
plenty of birds nests and move them
yourself manually. Does he perhaps find a bat?
That sounds like Robin Williams. No, there
are no bats that sound like Robin Williams. Okay, just curious.
While he's cutting down trees in this forest, just want
to make sure. Don't get that reference. Anyways,
once the wildlife is cleared,
then I
with my old, you know, I was like a wood elf, right?
So I wrap a rope.
You are a wood elf.
I was.
I was raised in the woods.
So I tie a knot, and then I just get a ton of rope, and I basically, like, in the area that we're going to be cutting down, tie the trees together.
That way, when Smarsh drops them, they can all fall and stay together, grouped together.
Nice.
And then I'm going to just kind of wrangle Smarsh to help me bundle them.
Make an animal handling check to see if you're able to wrangle Smarsh successfully.
Smarsh, I should have advantage on this, right?
17.
Oh, yeah, it's no problem.
Smarsh seems to grasp what you're doing and is very enthusiastic about it and helps.
It seems like it would be a ton of work, but luckily with Smarsh's help, you make very quick work of it and get it all done.
Smarsh does help.
Yeah, Smarsh helps.
Smarsh helps.
Smarsh gone.
And then, and then I go around and I plant seeds where the trees once were.
Where you get the seeds from?
The trees that I just downed.
They have acorns and such, right?
Yeah, I just dump all those in all the holes.
I've played Minecraft. They drop seeds sometimes.
Look at you.
A sustainable clearing
of the forest here. He used to be a wood elf.
What are you now?
Castle elf.
Oh.
He's describing elves like an
indoor-outdoor pet.
My house elf.
I watch out for Santa.
No one give him a sock.
Okay, yeah, make a nature check for me.
Okay.
Ooh, 17.
Okay, yeah, you managed to successfully plant the seeds and do it all correctly.
You are still in touch with your wood elf origins.
You gather up all the wood and make sure that more than an equal amount of trees are replanted
to replenish the forest.
And none of the animals are mad at you because you rolled very
well. And I speak to them in their
language and I go,
They don't understand
anything he's saying.
Let me handle this.
That's terribly offensive.
Yeah.
He's just swearing at them. He doesn't realize it.
It's like that scene in Emperor's New Groove
where Kronk can speak to the chipmunk.
Squeak him, squeak him, squeak him, squeak him.
All right.
Do you head back to town with this?
I mean, is there anything else out there?
Do I perceive any, like...
While I'm out there,
I might as well bolster the defenses of the Infinite HQ.
I mean, do I see any, like, holes in the walls?
I mean, yeah, there are, you know, plenty of holes.
The town is messed up, but, you know, there is active construction happening,
trying to make all of these repairs.
I make a mental note, and then I want to relay this to Dr. Ham later.
That way we have all of our spaces secure.
Sure.
And then I head back with Smarsh.
Yeah, you come back with your bountiful amount of lumber,
and Brink seems very happy to see Smarsh and you.
Oh, welcome back.
Yeah, this will definitely help.
Smarsh, I'm giving you a promotion.
You are now Boulder Ray's town guard.
You're going to be in charge of patrolling and protecting the
borders of Boulder Ray.
Smarsh guard.
I give Smarsh a nice
big pat. Well done. You deserved it.
I know that Brink Tussle is trying to give me
a rise out of me, but I'm so proud
of you, bro. Smarsh, you grew up so big. Papers.
What? He wants your papers. What does
that mean? He's guarding. He's working
as guard. He's the guard saying, papers, please.
I hope he didn't bring any foreign fruit into this place.
Have you touched livestock?
Smarsh, what?
All right, yeah, excellent job.
Smarsh begins his job as town guard very, very happily.
I like the mental image of Smarsh somehow delicately holding a tiny little stamp in his mouth.
So he can approve.
While all this is going on at the same time.
But will you please head to the northern gates and receive Captain Marge?
She's here?
Indeed.
The Jebediah should be docked at the northern shores.
All right.
I'm on the mission.
And I head north. Okay. Yeah. You head north to the northern gates and yeah,, I'm on the mission. And I head north.
Okay, yeah, you head north to the northern gates,
and yeah, you find Captain Marge there.
Ah, Barty Boy.
Uh, so formal, you usually call me Bucko Bart.
Bucko Bart?
Barty Boy's formal?
I'm here to report we recently visited New Valros.
It was under attack by ruthless creatures we've never seen before.
Oh, we've seen them.
Have you?
Maybe.
What did you see?
We've been to New Valros before.
Sure.
Yeah, you actually met Captain March there.
She's the one who gave you a ride back over to Bouldering.
Are there new creatures attacking?
Oh, yes.
Oh, what kind of creatures?
These creatures call themselves the Anarchs.
They're red and misty, constantly
twisting and flailing about.
It must be hard to fight them. Oh, it is very.
And we did our best. But
every time we employed a new strategy,
they changed tactics on us.
What seemed to do the job
if you did manage to take any of them down?
Oh, we didn't. Oh.
Naive and goddess Andi has to lead the Valrosians
and Ishbion into the ethereal plane.
It's not a permanent solution, but it's keeping them safe for now.
We barely escaped the shores before the entire city was decimated.
That's when we received word to regroup in Boulderang with Dr. Hamm and hear his plan of attack.
Hmm.
What creatures did you see?
Oh, you don't want to know.
They weren't red and misty, but they were yellow and blobby.
Ew. Yeah, the amnusias.
Ah, yes. You heard of those before?
Never encountered them, but have heard of them.
Probably have to ask you questions
every now and then just to make sure you're not one of them.
Don't take it personally.
Oh, they can impersonate? Yeah.
Just do a secret handshake, Bart.
Alright, here we go. A one and a two
and a one, two, three. Up high, down low, in the middle, too slow.. All right, here we go. A one and a two and a one, two, three.
Up high, down low, in the middle, too slow.
Left, right, jazzy.
Money shot.
Don't leave me hanging.
Eat my shorts.
That's our secret signal.
Yeah.
Well, I'm glad you guys made it out of there, you know, mostly unscathed.
Yeah, it was tough, but we did it.
We're a hearty crew. What are they doing here?
What the heck happened? I thought we were winning.
Seems like everyone's under attack
and like everything that we've done is being undone.
We don't have all the gems and there's still that
the big bad guy
Entropa.
There you go.
Well, what are you guys doing
back here then? We answered the call from Dr. Rahem to regroup here and figure out how to counterattack and get back to New Valros.
I'm glad you're here.
Glad to be part of the crew once again.
He salutes.
What was your job on the ship again?
I think I was the helmsman.
All I remember is what I did.
I don't remember anything.
I was the rope doctor.
I was the real doctor.
That's right. Yeah, I think I was like. You were the helmsman, yeah. I think I was the helms't remember anything. I was the rope doctor. I was the real doctor. That's right.
Yeah, I think I was like.
You were the helmsman, yeah.
I think I was the helmsman.
Yeah.
You were steering and stuff.
You work hard, you play hard.
Yeah, I was the helmsman.
She tosses you a silver piece.
Hey.
Thanks, mom.
Money, please.
Is Marge mom?
I mean, I guess not technically.
Okay, because the people that came and attacked said that your parents aren't drunk.
But Marge isn't actually like a biological mama.
I essentially like grew up on this pirate ship.
Okay, that's what I thought.
Pseudo-mom.
Yeah.
It's my favorite Pokemon.
Do you have anything else you want to ask Marge about
or talk about?
How's the weather out there?
How big of a crew are you coming with?
Oh, we have a full complement.
The Jebediah is packed and ready to go.
Excellent.
We need all the help we could get.
All right.
Well, I guess do I bring Captain Marge and the crew back?
Yeah, you take Captain Marge back to see Dr. Hammond.
Okay.
Yeah.
While Bart is off heading to the Northern Gates,
Kyborg is heading to the Southern Gates.
Mud, I need you to make your way to the Bouldery Brig.
Which is formerly the Immerse Gateway.
You need to find Sorto.
He's been spending a lot of time there lately.
You should talk to him about the Bramble Box.
I think he will find it intriguing, maybe even hopeful. God, what was the Bramble Box. I think he will find it intriguing, maybe even
hopeful. God, what was the
Bramble Box? The thing that you could build that
would trap souls inside of it? It's what
Sludge was trapped in until he got released.
Maybe that's a version of what Sordo's in.
Well, the Bramble Box... No, Bramble Box of the
Briar Orb. The Briar Orb is what he
was trapped in. The Bramble Box is different.
Do you want to remind them, John, if you have it in front of you?
A wooden box made from briar wood with a needle-covered tree carved into it can only be opened by the Bramble box is different. Do you want to remind them, John, if you have it in front of you? A wooden box made from briarwood with a needle-covered tree
carved into it can only be opened
by the Bramblecrack bloodline.
Buttline.
The Bramblecrack bloodline. Oh, so Clay can open it.
Oh, oh, oh.
Oh, it's got
a white seed and a small scroll
inside of it with instructions
to plant and cultivate into a briarwood
tree, and
the seed will eventually sprout and grow directly under the moonlight.
Oh, it drops the orbs.
Yes.
Okay.
So I need a plant.
I want to plant the tree.
So I go down to the brig, and I bring gumbo.
Mud and gumbo.
You head over to the brig, which was, like I said, formerly the Immerse Gateway,
and the air doesn't feel moist like it once did.
The circular room is filled with
jail cells each unique from the other one is open with frigid air pouring out you see sordo inside
it looks like he's next to someone that's laying down he's in a jail cell that's got cold air
flowing out of it yeah the door's open yeah there's cold air flowing yeah and there's someone
on the ground yeah i investigate who's on the ground. It's his dwarven body that's on ice. It's Archie? Yeah, it's the body of Archie
that's on ice in the
cell. He's preserving
it. And across in one of the other
cells, you spy Paralite
and her cell is glowing
with purple Sangria Knight. Wait, like
the real Paralite? Mm-hmm. Gumbo starts
growling. You all caught her
and brought her back. I didn't realize she was right here.
She's allergic to...
That's why it's keeping her... It's like holding Superman
in a kryptonite prison. Oh, okay. Exactly.
Still like, here's your cancer cell, I guess.
I don't know.
He's a bad guy. The Geneva Convention
might have something to say about it, but that's in a
different plane. Yeah. What?
Okay. I approach
Sorto. He seems a little startled, like,
oh, oh, oh, hello, Mud.
Hey, Sordo.
Sorthro.
Sorthro.
Hey, Sordo.
Have we quite figured out how to get you into your body yet?
Not yet, but I've been sitting here trying to analyze all the possibilities,
and I still haven't yet come up with a solution.
Do you even recall how you got into the orb that you're in right now?
I was placed here through magics by Entropa.
Oh, that's right.
And Dr. Ahem has not figured out how to reverse that, I assume.
Correct.
That's a bummer.
Yeah, I really miss my body.
It's worse right there.
Let's take a look.
You already have a look. Do you?
You already have a description.
I was going to give you one.
That's just really funny.
Well, I'd love to try to help if there's anything I can do.
Dr. Rahim said you acquired an item that might be of help with this.
Oh, yeah, it actually might. I have a seed that needs planted that could bear fruit that might help.
Would you mind showing it to me?
Sure.
It says John distrusting
Gus.
Yeah, I pull out the bramble box and open
it up and show him the seed. Interesting.
Perhaps we should try planting it together.
I think we should. It's got a few
specific instructions on who to
plant it and I am
not stalling at all while I find
the instructions. I've got them in front of me.
Step one! Speak to the seed in its
native tongue, which I have.
Whisper words of encouragement and nourishment.
I go up to it and I go,
You're the baddest b**** ever.
But we believe
out what I said.
Okay. And then I
carefully plant the seed in loamy
soil. Hey, Sorto, do you know what loamy
soil is? It's like a rich, fertile
soil. Yes, alright.
Second question. Do you happen to know when
the next full moon is, perhaps?
Not for a while. It's definitely a couple weeks
away. Don't you have access to a
demiplane where a full moon... I'm really
appreciating how much you know my inventory
more than me. Have I ever said that, Sorto?
Yes, I in fact have the thing
that I knew at the time was where I was going to
plant it. Would you like to go, me too? Yes,
I would love to go. We're going to
my... What is it?
Cloak of Secluded
Garden. This is what happens
when you give me too many items in one arc.
Alright, you all heard it. No more items
for anyone. Oh, you ruined it for the whole class.
If you need a spare hand, Parallelite's happy to help.
Yeah.
It's like the one kid in class,
you're like,
teacher, you left the map up on the board
during this geography test.
One time when we were in third grade,
the bell rang and our teacher wasn't there
and there was no substitute.
And I went to the office to tell them
we didn't have a teacher.
And everyone in the class tried to stop me.
So if you're ever curious if I've been a stick in the mud my entire life,
your answer's right there.
I went to the office and I was like, excuse me, principal, we don't have a teacher.
Excuse me.
I remember.
Actually.
I got really good at asking questions at the end of class
so that the teacher would get distracted and not assign homework.
And kids would be like, do the thing.
And I'd be like, okay.
Do the thing. Okay, yeah. So you open up be like, do the thing. And I'd be like, okay. Do the thing.
Okay, yeah.
So you open up your cloak, you activate it?
Yes.
Trying to find something that would be fun to...
Okay, yeah.
I was trying to figure out something.
Because there's an instruction here that says I have to...
There's a command that I have to have with it.
And so I say my command.
Ça c'est bon.
I don't know what that is.
It means that's good.
And yeah, so we go in there and we're in there.
Okay.
The space is not huge, about 50 by 50 feet,
but it's comfortable.
It's not like it's tight or anything.
How do you set?
So the light, the temperature, humidity,
it's all altered by you.
How do you want this environment to be?
I want to mimic the bayou as much as possible.
You know, humid, humid.
Humid, damp, muggy.
Just ripe for greenery.
It really does feel just like home.
And the soil is magical.
It seems very rich in minerals.
Not like minerals you could mine, but like minerals that help plants grow.
I look at Gumbo and I go, all right, dig.
And I make Gumbo make a little hole for the seed.
Gumbo begins digging.
He digs past the multiple truffles, tossing them to the side.
I take him and eat him.
And you have a pretty good sized
hole very quickly. Alright, I plant
the seed. Was there anything else I had to
do? Let me look to see if there were any more
instructions. Carefully plant the seed
in loamy soil under a full moon. I make sure it's
a full moon in my thing.
And I have to dampen the soil with a mixture
of water and ground. Oh, coffee
berries, basically. Arabica.
Arabica. I don't know if I have. Hey, Sorto, where. Arabica. Arabica. I don't know
if I have. Hey, Sorto, where
do we hold out the coffee? I think you were given
coffee. Yeah, you have coffee. I think you do.
It was when we were stealing it from Pius Pass.
Don't you have like special coffee that's like a
No, I have the special salt, but I do
have coffee. Yeah, you were given coffee.
I remember that. Okay, then I do that.
Oh, Sorto,
would you mind uh watching
the tree for me if you don't mind watching my body deal okay all right can i just bring the
body in here well that's not an ice though could i make a part of the place on ice i think the
and does that have to be the whole thing it all has to be the entire thing yeah it has to be the
entire okay i'll watch the body okay i'm gum and cast some mice wizard spell. Okay.
Yeah, you plant the seed.
And as you're talking with Sordo, you know, you work all this out.
And you turn back and look at it.
And you see that a small sapling has already started to grow.
Yay!
Oh, wow.
That was rather quick, wasn't it?
It's a bit quick.
I wonder if it's supposed to be that quick. Yeah, it's like three times the speed of normal growth.
It is?
It will grow up to birds, trees, leaves will appear, blah, blah, blah.
It doesn't say that. I think you're talking about the dimension
that you're in. Yeah, the dimension.
Is that Soto's new body? Are we talking like
Ant-Man quantum level
rules here? I was thinking more
Dragon Ball Z, but...
No, it doesn't say that. It doesn't say that?
Dragon Ball Z. Yeah, alright.
Where did I get that from?
The soil in this space is magical and rich in minerals, which causes plants and trees
to grow three times as fast.
I knew there was a three times.
Did you say that in the description?
I think I even said that.
I just forgot.
I had to send me the message.
I remembered it.
Or a piece of it, at least.
There it is.
Sorry.
I glossed over it.
Yep.
Also Dragon Ball Z.
Yeah.
Also Dragon Ball Z.
Obviously. Dragon, Dragon Ball. Yep. Also Dragon Ball Z. Yeah. Also Dragon Ball Z. Obviously.
Dragon, Dragon Ball.
My favorite D&D campaign.
Oh, hey.
So you only leave Sordo in here, not Gumbo.
You take Gumbo with you?
Yeah, I take Gumbo.
Okay.
Yeah, you exit your personal space.
You exit your secluded garden, and you're back in the icy jail cell.
I say, ça c'est bon, and bring the cloak back to myself.
Is Sordo trapped in there?
Mud, as you speak your command word and the cloak turns back to normal,
Sordo's spear shoots out of the cloak
and hits the jail cell wall.
Well, I guess I can't stay in there after all.
I'm just going to take a little nap here.
From across the way, Paralyte asks,
So, did you kill him?
Shut up.
No talking, prisoner.
What's your problem?
Well, you went in there with Sordo and came back by yourself.
It's going to come as a surprise to you, I'm sure,
but not all of us want to kill each other constantly.
She just stares at you with deep black eyes.
I stare back.
She begins rubbing the disfigured half of her face.
I giggle.
So what's going on in the world?
Everything's fine.
Everything's under control.
And you've caused nothing.
Sounds like a lot of construction out there.
Yes, they're building up the city.
Up?
Because it is doing so well and the economy is in such a good place
that business is booming.
Make a deception. And I bill business is booming. Make a deception.
And I billow my cloak.
Make a deception check.
Billow your cloak.
Oh, no.
But it's a charisma check, right?
Yeah, it is.
So I get advantage
because I billowed my cloak.
Oh.
You and your cloak of many colors.
11.
12.
12.
She rolls a 19 on her insight.
Dang.
Yeah, that doesn't sound very likely.
But then Gumbo rolls for deception.
And he says, no, no, no.
That's adorable.
Well, don't forget, if you need any help with whatever's going on, I can clean up any messes you left.
Mud's read a lot of folklore books that are illustrated and knows that it never
works out when you team up with the villain
to do things. She says that's why I didn't team up with you
I didn't say that
Oh okay. That's my internal
monologue. Shots fired
And Gumbo starts chuffing at her
Ooh how does that sound?
It's
Gumbo
Yeah I'm like pseudo holding him back and just letting him like that.
All right.
Is there anything else you need to get done down here?
I make a hand gesture that is only offensive to the Bramblecrack people.
I won't describe it right now for our audience, but it's a hand gesture to show her how I feel when I leave.
I love your shorts.
Incredibly offensive. Can you show it to us hand gesture that to show her how I feel. I love your shorts. Incredibly offensive.
Can you show it to us because we can see it?
Yeah, yeah. No, we won't describe it.
That's a secret for the Dramapack people.
I can't believe you did that.
Both hands are getting used to it.
Yikes.
Hail and well met, Stinky Dragon patrons.
Just a reminder to head over to at StinkyDragonPod on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok,
where you can watch animatic videos, puppet videos, and other fun D&D content.
Plus, the first two soundtracks of the show are now available on your favorite music streaming platforms,
composed by Micah Reisinger, which include the character songs for Mud and Gum Gum.
Also want to give a shout out to our Stinky Dragon subreddit and Discord community for all the work they've been doing on building a wiki page for the show.
You can find it at StinkyDragon.Fandom.com.
It's folks like these that post on social media using hashtag StinkyDragonPod that we name NPCs in the show after them.
What kind of NPCs you might be asking?
Well, Lizard the Gnoll Witherlings, named after At-Eliz-Tat.
Melkins the Gnoll Witherling, named after At-Maddy the Giant.
Talon the Prickup, named after At-T. Melkins the Gnoll Witherling, named after at Maddy the Giant. Talon the Prickup,
named after at Talon Tardis.
Maddy the Prickup,
named after at Magical Madoka.
And Val the Prickup,
named after at V Stymack.
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all right while all of that is going on gum gum uh you're also assigned a task hi gum gum i require assistance from you with something in my lab we're trying to split an atom
i have these coloring books and they need to be filled. Can I meet you at the mall?
We are meeting up with Meld, Atten, and Dant for a special assignment.
Would you mind accompanying me to my lab now?
Yes, sir.
Okay, and I start walking up north.
So Gum-Gum, you and Dr. Ahem begin making your way to the lab. And when you enter the lab, in the center of the stone room is Meld and Atten and Dant, just like Dr. Ahem said.
And they're tinkering with none other than the valet.
Remembered valet, Dr. Ahem's automaton assistant that you all fought once when you were first doing your training?
Hi.
Who do you say hi to?
I guess valet and the others.
Hi, hi, hi.
Meld, Atten, and Dant all seem a little startled, but valet does not move.
Dr. Ahem says,
We've been working on a project to convert Valet into something more useful. An armored suit that will protect me and offer additional mobility.
Cool.
Oh, neater.
Mecha, Dr. Ahem.
But we need your help, Gum-Gum.
Uh-huh.
We need to secure a power source for the suit.
Mmm, power. Yes, Gum- to secure a power source for the suit. Power.
Yes, Gum Gum, power.
Do you have any ideas for something that could continually power the suit?
Continually power the suit.
You have Iron Man's heart somewhere in there.
Any spare arc reactors?
Let me think.
But they have that because she's in a cell down there with it.
What kind of power does it, like, where does the power go?
Does it, like, eat it?
No, it just continually draws from it.
It's not fuel.
Coloring book, perhaps.
Something that continually generates power that can be harnessed.
Boom, boom.
Boom is just a rock.
Don't tell Gum-Gum that.
Does Dr. Ahem evolve into Dr. Echu when he's like in the middle?
Get out.
Kyborg falls over, dead.
Struck down.
He takes 120 points of hit damage.
121 HP.
What do you got?
I don't know.
I'm looking at what I got.
He's on page 3 of 85 on his inventory.
I can guide you. I'm just curious to see
what you came up with. If you came up with anything.
I was looking. I think the only thing I have
is one of my staffs.
My Javelin of Lightning, my Rainbringer staff
or my... Javelin of Lightning sounds like it could have
some energy. It's only once per long
rest. Is that not okay
to use right now? Well, they said they need something that
continually provides power.
Perhaps some broken arcane magic
that you have recently acquired?
I know what you're talking about,
Gum-Gum doesn't.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Do you have any powerful stones on you?
Do you want to be able to make flowers?
No, we need to make magical energies.
Okay, I have a wand that can do that.
I'm not going to make this.
I call it Boomba.
Oh, Boomba.
I'm not going to make this easy on you guys.
No, no, not that.
No?
Too powerful?
Too powerful?
Yes, that's it.
That would overload our suit.
Oh, yeah.
Here, why don't I have a look?
Okay.
Let me figure this out for you.
Here I have some...
Here's a pillow that I found in a cave.
No, that powers you, Gum-Gum.
Okay.
Here's a whistle that doesn't work.
I don't know.
Sorry.
Here, let me just get rid of this staff that's broken.
Wait, wait.
What about that?
That broken staff?
Oh, this is... That's magic staff. That's broken. Wait, wait, what about that broken staff?
That's magic staff. That's it.
Perhaps we can harness this energy
to power the suit. Okay,
I was gonna turn it into a magic staff,
but okay. Okay, uh, there's
like an open slot
in the suit. For clarification,
this is Zeus' broken staff. Yeah, the broken staff.
Okay, got it. Dr. M hands the broken
staff fragments over to Meld, Atten, and Dent.
They quickly fuse the fragments together and place them inside a small cavity in the center of the suit.
Now, to turn it on for the first time, we need a jump start from a powerful wizard.
I can jump.
No, not an actual jump, Gum-Gum.
We need a powerful burst of electricity courtesy of a powerful wizard.
Okay.
I can do that with my magic javelin of lightning.
Oh.
It's magic.
Are you a powerful enough wizard to use that gum gum?
Yes, I am.
Lightning.
Lightning.
I want that to be a text tone.
That's how long it wraps from this.
And then I try and light lightning it.
Or is that ready?
Yeah.
The bolt of lightning strikes the suit and it begins whirring, lighting up.
Eureka.
We've done it.
Yes.
Excellent work, Gum-Gum.
Here, as a token of my appreciation, let me give you this.
He gives you a small vial that says
this, my friend, is draconic
decoction. Oh my
goodness. Don't worry, don't worry.
It has been reverse engineered
to transform the drinker
into a dragon.
Oh, it's the plots of T'Bullions.
Yeah. The T'Bullions stuff, yeah.
Is there enough for all of them? Oh no.
I'm afraid there's only enough for one use.
Can you make more?
We can. It just takes a long time.
Okay. How do we go about that?
We wait, Gum-Gum.
Okay. Bye-bye. This is for you. Bye-bye.
A fair warning, Gum-Gum. It's not a permanent transformation.
It's a very limited window, so make sure the time is right when you want
to use it. How long?
It's hard to say. It depends.
Anywhere from 10 to 20 minutes.
And it only works on my friends,
the Booleans? No, it can
work on you. Oh. It can work on anyone
who drinks it. Neat. We're
working out the magics and reverse
engineering it. I didn't even think
about that, that a flying snake,
if you add arms and legs, is just basically
a dragon. Trogdor. Yeah.
Trogdor, yeah.
Alright. Bye-bye.
I like to imagine
Gum-Gum says bye-bye, then runs off.
Okay, bye-bye. Like Naruto runs?
Yeah.
Nope, that was it. Bye-bye.
He got valet started.
And I jump out.
Jump out of the lab?
Well, I guess I'll run out the door and then jump.
Don't jump out any windows again.
Remember what happened last time.
I jump start.
Oh, gotcha.
You jump start.
Okay, it's fresh in your mind.
I was like, yo, Captain Marge.
All right, cool.
Come down with me.
Yeah, you all reconvene at the town square.
Tremendous work, everyone.
Now, if you're all finished, we should head to the dock straight away.
And is Dr. Ham wearing this mech suit now?
They're working on getting him into it now.
Like, as you leave, they're, you know, still tinkering with it, getting final preparation stuff.
Is he going to be able to walk when he wears this?
I don't know.
We'll find out.
Dr. Ham is the robot now.
A lot of people don't know this,
but Tales of the Sinky Dragon is actually just the origin
story of Master Chief.
So you guys
head north as a high noon sun peeks
through some clouds overhead. You pass the gates
and Captain Marge leads you down a path
toward the shoreline. As you near the water,
you recognize Bart's old ship, the Jebediah,
being restocked. You all make your
way aboard and notice the ship's complement is fuller than usual.
You look around and see some familiar faces beyond the normal crew,
such as Meld, Duncan, Besler, Dr. Ahem, who shows up suited up in his new armor.
There you go.
Is he walking?
Yes.
Anyway.
Dr. Ahem turns to Captain Marge and she gives him a nod.
Are you going to add some like...
I'm walking around.
We got it.
I'm just providing all the sound effects today for you.
Walk up to Dr. Hone and say,
What's the matter?
Baldur has you pushing dirty pencils.
And then I take my robot arm and I clasp it onto his robot arm
in, like, a high-five kind of manly situation.
And there's a close-up of it.
Dylan!
Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Yeah. He says,
Kaiborg, you son of a witch!
Yeah.
Doctor, him clears his throat.
If I could have
everyone's attention.
He feels very on brand.
Here is the plan.
We set sail for the land of Teterra.
Once there, the goal is to do everything we can to get the Infinites past the border.
We will most likely be met with resistance, as they only allow people with draconic blood inside.
That's why Duncan and I are here. We were both born in Tetera, but Duncan has spent more time there than I. We will disguise
the Infinites and Duncan will go with them as a cultural guide. Once inside, the Infinites will
search for Inku and put a stop to whatever she's doing in Tetra. We don't know if her claim about
Bart's parents is true or not, so you will need to investigate that as well.
We had hoped to take Soto with us,
but no one seems to know
where he is.
Say something.
Just whistling and
twiddling my foot. While the
five of you are in Tetera, the
rest of us will be heading northward to
Erblum to find and capture
Hugh Manor.
I believe it is no coincidence that he escaped prison at such a time as this,
and he is too dangerous to be ignored.
Both teams will stay in contact via Sending Stone
and will regroup once our missions are complete.
Any questions?
Questions!
Yes, Kyborg.
Hey, Kyborg here.
Who's watching Paralyte? The Bouldery Guborg. Hey, Kyborg here.
Who's watching Paralyte?
The bouldery gods.
The unnamed city guards.
What about Smarsh?
Yes, the bouldery gods are led by Smarsh.
Okay.
Next question before we leave.
Can I say goodbye to Smarsh?
Absolutely, Kyborg.
Okay.
All right.
I leave the group really quick.
All right. You run back up.
Smarsh sees you approaching the town and says, who goes there?
It's me. It's Kyborg. It's your best friend, Smarsh. Let approaching the town and says, Who goes there? It's me.
It's Kyborg.
It's your best friend, Smarsh.
Let's do our secret handshake.
Okay.
He's a worm.
Everyone's going to have secret handshakes.
Give him good pets.
He has to do it with his tongue.
How about you just chest bump him?
Yeah, a chest bump him.
Oh, okay.
How much damage does that do?
Make a strength check.
All right.
13.
Yeah, Smarsh is very solid,
but you managed to land on your feet.
You avoid getting knocked on your butt.
You felt like you...
Smarsh is so powerful,
you almost got knocked all the way to Totora.
That's cool.
All right, catch you later.
Be safe.
Then Smarsh gets back to circling the town.
That's awesome.
Are there any other questions?
I don't think so, yeah.
We're going to sneak in.
We need dragons.
No, we're going to be smuggled in by Duncan.
Oh, I speak Draconic,
so I'll be actually useful on this mission.
Oh, that's true.
Sweet.
We'll see if you can make the checks.
Besler chimes up and says,
in the meantime, you four need to follow me.
And Besler starts making his way down
to the lower deck of the ship.
Besler, buddy.
We follow. Good old buddy, buddy. He's not in of the ship. Bezler, buddy. We follow.
Good old buddy, buddy. He's not in disguise?
No. Oh, okay. Wow.
He's become more comfortable around us. Good.
I cast Polymorph and make him look like something else.
Who's this?
I don't think Gum-Gum hasn't seen him since
in non-disguise since episode one.
Who is you? Hi, I'm Gum-Gum. What's your name?
It's me, Baszler.
We met.
Oh, hi.
I helped you fix your wagon when your wheel fell off.
Oh.
Bart stole my tool.
That's right.
Yeah, but I gave it back.
That'd be really cool to see that in puppets.
To see that story in puppets form.
Yeah, just a little shout out.
We did that clip as a puppet version.
So we released that on
at StinkyDragonPod on all of our social channels.
What a plug. Someone actually
sent a pretty good suggestion
via Twitter for another one.
And so I'm going to say we're open to suggestions
for other spots in the story or audio
clips that you think would be good for puppets. Anything you want us to
recreate in puppet form. Yeah.
Think good like one minute kind of clips
or that could be cut down to like a tight one minute.
If you don't give us good suggestions
we'll just puppet this very clip
that we're saying right now.
Almost like I had Bart and Marge
do a handshake
thinking it would be funny to see that
portrayed as a puppet.
With like an eye patch.
That's funny. Alright, so you all follow Bezler?
Yeah. Sure. Okay, yeah, you all follow Bezler down to the cargo hold,
and he stops at a large crate and opens it up.
No pretense this time.
I've had a change in heart, or whatever.
He looks down at his feet.
You have a heart?
Anyway, I'm retiring from my less-than-legal practices
and now walking the path of the straight and narrow.
Cool.
So I brought my last stash of supplies and I can upgrade your gear again.
Who wants to go first?
Do we have any, has Dr. Ahem given us any like pay in a bit?
It's been a while since we've gotten pay.
Oh, this is all on the house.
Oh, dang.
Oh my goodness.
We must go to the roof.
Mud opens up his garden and just shoves everything into the garden.
It's not quite like that.
This is upgrades for some of your items.
Yeah.
All right.
Who has to go first?
Mud's going first.
And he's definitely the first person we said who should go first.
So Mud, you have the options to upgrade your shield to a shield of Fortifana.
Yeah.
Your signet ring can be upgraded to a ring of familiar bond
or you can also upgrade your signet ring instead to a ring of cheeky guidance oh man i was actually
gonna go with the ring of cheeky guidance because it gives the the guidance a plus two to it it's
also a funny name it is for how you approach this but i i just reread the things that you can do with the ring of familiar bond, the charges.
And I like the idea of making a large gumbo.
Am I reading that correctly?
That it would enlarge?
Yeah.
Okay.
Then I'm going to go with the ring of familiar bond and upgrade my signet ring, which will
allow me to perform the bind familiar ritual because now gumbo and I will have matching
rings.
Yeah.
It's adorable.
Yeah.
Because now Gumbo and I will have matching rings.
Yeah.
It's adorable.
Yeah.
His is more like a bracelet.
And basically, my familiar will, I mean, he already obeys my commands, but he can take part in combat and I can telepathically, wait.
He can take part in combat as a bonus action on your turn.
Yeah.
He's a bonus action. I can communicate with him telepathically.
And then the ring has three charges that I can expend one charge
to do the following as a bonus action.
I can sense through my familiar senses
until my next turn.
I can grant my familiar 10 temporary hit points
for one minute,
or I can use enlarge
and enlarge or reduce,
use the spell on the familiar.
Yeah, you can only use the enlarged portion of the spell.
Oh, okay, cool.
You cannot use the reduced portion.
So it would double his size in all dimensions and multiply his weight by eight
i've been wanting to let gumbo participate in combat more but i've been scared to have him
participate in combat because gus is blood you know yeah he's bloodthirsty but this allowed me
to let gumbo kind of fight and not and be a little less scared so i like that okay so i'm gonna take
the ring of familiar bond all right sounds good bart scared. So I like that. Okay, so I'm gonna take the Ring of Familiar Bond.
All right, sounds good.
Bart, do you know what you want?
I sure do.
So Bart has the options of upgrading the Ring of Truth telling to a Ring of Truth zone,
an upgrade to the Wand of Magic detection to become a Wand of Magical Means,
or an upgrade for your loot to make it a Loot of Laughable Levity.
I'm gonna do the loot.
I get the Loot of Laughable Levity.
And what does that do for you?
Now I could expend one charge as a bonus action to play the instrument and cast the following spells.
Calm emotions, levitate, and a new one, gaff of gaggery,
which is when you cast the spell, you eloquently remold the memories of listeners in your immediate vicinity
so that each creature of your choice within five feet of you forgets everything you or an ally just said within the last six seconds and replace it with a joke or punchline of your choosing.
It's a men in black thing.
The joke or punchline is the verbal component of the spell.
Well, you need to attune this to yourself, Bart.
Uh-huh.
In order to attune yourself for this upgrade, you must play the lute while telling a joke that gets someone to laugh.
Can I do that right now?
If you want to do it right now, you can.
All right, everybody.
Bart's telling us a joke.
I'm going to specifically tell this one to Gum Gum.
Yeah, easiest crowd.
What does a baby computer call his father?
Data.
Data.
Yeah.
I don't get it.
It is now attuned and yours
Alright, loot of
lackable levity. Alright, Mud and Bart
are done. Who wants to go next? I'll go next
Alright, Kyborg, you can
upgrade Elven Eiros
You can upgrade your
Arm Cannon of Everwinter
or you can upgrade your Long
Bow of Crystallina to a your longbow of Crystallina
to a longerbow of Crystallina.
Lame.
So with the Elven arrows,
I'll let the crew know this
so that they can kind of make a decision for me,
with me, if they would like to chip in.
One of them is like I get plus two bonus attack
with the special arrows.
I get three charges,
so I get three of these arrows per long rest.
And then it also reveals a 30-foot sphere.
It's the Hanzo arrows from Overwatch.
Oh, cool.
So that's that.
Our arm cannon of Everwinter just gives, like, what?
3d6 bludgeoning damage, 3d6 cold damage.
Yeah, 3d10 cold damage.
Yeah, 3d10, and it doesn't require ammunition,
but it does require its one charge per long rest.
And the longbow of Kristalina,
it's upgraded because I can now change
who my sworn enemy is.
Clarification on that.
So if someone doesn't,
if they become your sworn enemy,
but don't die.
Right.
Do I still have disadvantage on all the other enemies?
Yeah, once you've chose a sworn enemy,
you have disadvantage when attacking anyone else.
But as a bonus action,
you can change who your sworn enemy is.
That's the whole point. Is that now you can change it.
You can hop it around. Also new
while my sworn enemy lives it has
advantage on attack rolls against me.
So it's kind of like reckless attack for a barbarian.
Yeah. As long as you're fighting from a distance you're fine.
Yeah. Unless they're at a distance too.
What are you going to do?
I don't know. Which one of you guys thinks that
sounds cool? Who's thinking what sounds cool? I'm leaning towards the longbow. Do the longbow. I do feel bad? I don't know. Which one of you guys thinks that that sounds cool? Who's thinking what sounds cool?
I'm leaning towards the longbow.
Do the longbow.
I do feel bad that I don't use my mom's longbow, so I'm going to upgrade the longbow.
All right.
It is now a longer bow of crystallina.
Okay.
And then in order to attune it, I must be a blood relative of crystallina.
Check.
And I must cut a lock of one's hair off and braid it into the bow.
And I do that.
I take my long sword and I snip a little part out
and then I just do arts and crafts.
All right, do you assume like down at the bottom?
Maybe into the handle.
I don't know.
I tell Gumbo to grab the hair.
Stop it.
He's like a cat with a thing, like a claw.
But then you enlarge him.
You just take the bow away from Kyborg.
Yeah.
All right, GumGum, you're up.
You can upgrade your battle axe to become a balancing axe.
You can upgrade your staff of flowers to a staff of friendly flowers,
or you can upgrade your friendship bracelets to BFF bracelets.
I'm thinking either the staff of flowers so I can cast friends once for a long rest
or the balancing axe, which I think is better than the friendly backs of kindness because I can.
This just seems like more useful or procs more often, at least because it's on every hit.
I do want friendly flowers, though.
This is the last one, huh?
This is your upgrade.
This is the last one from Bezler.
Take your upgrade.
I guess I'll do the balancing axe.
Okay.
And I ask Bezler, is there a way to make guess i'll do the balancing axe okay and i asked bezler is there
a way to make this axe bigger the balancing axe yeah like a balancing axe that's like my old big
axe he scratches his head and says yeah perhaps if we find the blacksmith who can elongate and
maintain the arcane energies of the axe that's? Oh, perhaps. Is she a blacksmith? Yes.
She's on the boat, too, but there's no
smith on the boat. But we have a smith.
I thought Meld was a woodworker. She does both.
Oh, okay. She was like a general
crafts person who tried to learn
all the different crafts. Convenient.
Alright, I guess I'll do the balancing axe
because I think that's pretty cool.
I'm so excited to ruin you guys' day with something
I just discovered with my attack.
You're not going to ruin our day, though, right?
No, I'm going to ruin Micah and Gus' day.
You're going to ruin our day all the time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Though in order to attune yourself to this axe, Gum-Gum,
you need to walk on your tiptoes for 24 hours.
It's going to be very difficult on a boat.
I will do my best.
I hope you have your seat toes.
Your calves are going to be busting at the end of this.
Busting.
Busting. Busting.
Busting.
And of course, on top of the upgrades, you're welcome to any consumables as well that Bezler has with him.
For frees.
Since Bezler is retiring, he's offering each of you one or two items from his stash for free,
but the rest is being used for the mission in Urbloom.
Oh, well, that changes everything.
I didn't even bother looking at the list because I had no money.
Can I just go ahead and call out the two items I'd like?
Absolutely.
Okay.
If no one's got a problem with this, I'd love to take the eggless of equipping,
which is a druid item, so I doubt any of you really wants it.
This is from NovaRogue13.
Thank you very much.
You submitted it on the RT site.
And it's a little wooden necklace that's in the shape of an egg.
While I'm in wild shape, the necklace remains on my neck.
And as a bonus action, I can actually recall one of the items for my equipment.
Because when I turn into an animal, I don't have access to it.
So that's kind of nice.
And then it's good for once for long rest.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So doing that.
And then I'm also, since everyone is reading through stuff right now and I can just say whatever I want,
And then I'm also, since everyone is reading through stuff right now and I can just say whatever I want,
I'm going to take the Waste of Time, which is a tattered belt that once for long rest grants the user automatic success on a skill check with the best possible outcome.
However, this check cannot advance the plot.
You want to do some flirting? You want to perform some acrobatics? Sure, why not?
As long as it wastes everyone else's time.
As long as we have fun along the way.
Which I think was supposed to be a dig at Kyborg, but I'm taking this.
And this is from Jordo AIG from Twitter.
Thank you so much, Jordo.
And I'm taking these to my equipment now.
Nice.
Those are good items.
I like them.
Anybody else?
I see Chris and Barb, you both have some stuff selected.
Yeah, Chris, if you want to go next.
Can I get the cockadoodle collar?
Once for a long rest, a character
can blow into this gilded bone
horn. A magical chicken appears in a
location of their choosing within 30 feet of the user.
All hostile creatures within
10 feet of the chicken must succeed on a DC
15 wisdom save or be inexplicably
frightened of it for one minute.
The chicken can speak common and will offer a single
piece of advice should it be asked to do so.
Once it is given a piece of advice for one minute passes, the chicken disappears into a puff of green smoke.
That sounds like a Chris item.
That sounds like a gum gum item.
And that item was submitted by KingKaiju7567.
Very cool.
And then the other one, the Laz Reverse Elixir of Reversal.
When consumed, allows the players to swap their highest and lowest modifiers.
The player must consider the consequences as these effects last until the player's next long rest once used only so this last river's elixir of reversal what what would that do to me it swaps
your highest and lowest modifier let's see so it just make me really dumb probably make you really
smart it would swap your intelligence and either your strength or constitution.
So your strength would get low and your intelligence would get high.
I don't know.
I think it'd make me dumb.
Maybe.
Take it.
Take it quick.
So you can understand.
All right.
I'll get back.
All right.
It's one use only.
And that's from at Usher Adam.
Barb, I see you got someone here.
Yeah.
So I'm looking at this key mimic.
Seems like it could be pretty handy for the team to have.
It's kept in a sturdy jar. This tiny key mimic takes the shape of a brass key.
If used on a lock, the key mimic will attempt to devour the insides of the lock, creating a loud noise audible up to 90 feet away.
If the DC of the lock is less than 15 after 1D6 minutes, the lock will be destroyed.
than 15 after 1d6 minutes the lock will be destroyed
and the key mimic can be returned to the
jar if the DC is 15 or higher
roll a d20 on the 10 or less
the key mimic fails to destroy the lock
bites the user for 1d10
damage and runs away
say goodbye to kyborg being the only person who can endorse
there you go or chests
um and I don't know if I'm allowed to get two
yeah I just want to give a quick shout out that
was submitted by Mike Kern.
Yeah.
That's a funny item.
I like that item.
It's a great item.
Yeah, I love it.
All right, what else you got?
And then I would like to get the basket of Arcana mana.
Did you want that?
No, no, no, no.
I was worried there was something else
you were going to go for.
Okay.
It's a basket of three slices of multicolored glowing bread
that grants the consumer to cast any second level spell
they already know for free without using a spell slot
each slice could be shared with the different members of the party however due to the mass
amount of magic preservatives and gluten in the bread they are weighed down and sluggish and must
take disadvantage on any role involving movement so acrobatic stealth etc for the next hour while
it gets digested and then butter and jam are not included. And there's only three uses of it.
So from my understanding, I just want to make sure,
I do still want this, but each slice can be shared with everybody?
Or is it like, is there a maximum amount of people that could share the slice?
I think each person eats one slice.
So you could pass out.
When you use it, it creates three slices.
So it's not like I have three slices, one slice to share amongst the four,
and then two slices left. It's like one slice per person. Correct. It's like a it creates three slices. So it's not like I have three slices, one slice to share amongst the four, and then two slices left.
It's like one slice per person.
Correct.
It's like a total of three slices, and then you divvy up as you see fit.
And I assume I don't have to use all of them at once.
It's not like, okay, cool.
Cool.
Yep.
My basket of Arcana Mana.
But you can't keep them for too long.
They will go stale.
Yes.
And that's from Daniel Schultz.
Daniel Schultz, yes.
All right, Kyborg. Kyborg's
ready. Alright, first one. Gift
of the Traumatic Flagon.
Traumatic. I knew you would take it.
Did I say traumatic? You said traumatic. Traumatic.
Yeah, I meant traumatic. Sorry. Trauma.
What is it again?
Gift of the Dramatic Flagon.
There we go. A gaudy flagon encrusted in
sapphire. Any creature that takes a swig of
liquid courage, beverage, or choice from this flagon grants an additional 1d8 to any charisma based check
i need this really bad if the roll fails the consumer immediately vomits taking 1d4 alcohol
poisoning damage and 1d4 stage fright slash psychic damage once for a long rest uh this
is submitted by barkski on twitter. Ooh, sounds like this is something
that's going to end up being pretty fun at one point.
Yeah.
Hopefully it works because I need it.
The other one that I wanted to get
was Jade Cat of Playful Spirit.
I'm surprised none of you idiots got it
because this thing's awesome.
I wanted it, but I was like,
it seems like it'd be better for someone else.
Kick rocks.
Once per long rest,
this little Jade Cat statue
turns into a green cat
spirit named pocket or whatever the user would like to name it oh i should name that for one of
my cats uh that becomes your familiar for four minutes able to do simple tasks and carry up to
10 pounds in its little stone mouth lastly in a 10 foot range you are able to see through the
cat's eyes by saying the following words who's a good kitty to tune the little Jade cat these are most actually a cat for five minutes
Once for long rest this is submitted by magical Madoka on Twitter slash
Double B flat on reddit because it's the same person they just have different names. Do you want to
Don't know you want to tune yourself?
Time where has started same person, they just have different usernames. Do you want to, uh... Let's test it out now. Do you want to tune yourself? Yeah.
Okay, the timer has started.
No. Taboo, where are you on the ground?
Uh, I scratch, cum-cum, and, uh,
scratch. I get down on the ground and play
too.
Oh, God. Besler looks up at you
all, and you swear there's a tear in his
eye. What? I, um,
I want you all to know that you're not that bad.
I know we haven't exactly gotten along all the time, but I guess, well, I guess it's
nice that the Infinites actually turned out to be good people like you.
I'm going for a hug.
I've always liked you, Bessler.
Anyway, this is probably the last time you'll see me.
What?
Like, seriously, no disguises or no fake accents.
This is it.
Someone helped me realize that it's finally time for me to settle down,
find a steady job, and help people when I can.
And you hear footsteps approach from behind
and a familiar voice asks,
Are you about done, sweetheart?
You turn around to see a big spectacle orc
holding a book and chewing on gum.
It's Oof.
Oh, yes, dear.
Just finished up.
Aww.
Hi, Oof.
They're together?
Can I give Embezzler a big hug?
Sure.
Okay.
I guess, you know,
the same opposites attract.
Yeah.
Well, they were like, did they meet for the first time at the cart in episode one?
Yeah.
Oh, sweet.
We had Oof driving the cart and then Embezzler came over.
You were there when they first met.
Wow.
It's because of us.
Yeah.
I'll officiate your wedding if you want.
Yeah.
Unless you guys are already married.
I don't know.
We give them a good rate.
Yeah. 600 gold pieces. And you're like snapper suspenders 700 marrying a lawyer wow your parents
must be so happy oh yeah the speed of which uh oaf does chime in yes i finally did finish my
studies and have earned my law degree. You passed the bar?
Yeah, I was trying to think of a joke.
You passed the bar.
Yes, I can
officially practice law.
Wow.
And I'm going to be moving to the land of
Pharaohs and open a law practice there.
Wow, okay. Sounds like a spin-off show.
Spin-off tale?
It does!
Alright, who's going to be playing Bezler? The familiar voice of Deadman Wow, okay. It sounds like a spin-off show. It does. It does.
All right, who's going to be playing Bezler?
Who's going to be playing?
The familiar voice of Deadman Dreffle calls out overhead,
Land ho!
Oof and Bezler hold hands, offer you a nod, and head up to the main deck.
I was going to steal from Bezler, but I decided against it in the end.
Can we join them up on the deck?
Yeah.
When you reach the main deck, on the horizon,
you see an island surrounded by a towering wall along its border.
The wall blocks most of your view of the island,
but you do manage to catch a glimpse of a massive volcano in the center of the aisle.
Sail ho!
Captain Marge says,
Arr, Enfrights and Duncan looks like a scout ship be approaching.
You best be getting ready.
Hey, can I borrow your immovable rod?
I gotta balance.
Sure, sure. You can have it for a bit. Are you on your toes? Yeah.
Good. That's really smart.
Duncan asks, does anyone need
help with a disguise? I mean, we need
to look draconic, right? Yes.
We need to try to pass their test to get in.
Let me think. I mean, yeah. I mean,
I do have a disguise kit and I'm pretty crafty
myself, but I could always use help.
Sure. Yeah, Duncan is more could always use help. Sure. Yeah.
Duncan is more than willing to help offer assistance.
How do you want to look?
Like what kind of dragon?
Is there a specific color you're looking for?
I would like to be kind of like a, like a orangey red color.
And are you looking to be like a dragonborn, a kobold, some other kind of dragonkin?
Dragonborn.
Dovahkiin, some say.
So like a reddish orange dragonborn.
Ooh, nice.
What about everyone else?
Bart tries to blow fire and he can't.
Mud uses disguise self and recalls an old movie that he saw once about a Scottish dragon.
He was the last of his dragons.
But he had a friend that was a little human.
It was a cute little story.
Kind of a Dennis type.
Dennis Quaid type.
Was it Dennis Quaid?
Was it Quaid? I think it was.
It was. It was him doing a gruff voice
the entire film.
So I look like that.
He's going to look like a guy
named Draco.
One of his heroes.
Gum gum cyborg?
I'll just be a kind of a dragon with wings.
A big giant dragon.
Oh, 30 feet big.
30 feet big?
Yeah.
You're supposed to disguise yourself as a...
Make yourself much bigger.
Oh, okay.
I guess, how big am I?
However that big is.
Okay, you want to be that big?
Okay.
Duncan says...
I believe Dr. Ahem also gave you something you can use to make yourself draconic for a little while.
Well, I was going to say that.
Okay. It makes him draconic,
not a dragon. Potato, potato.
So what, the effects of it are just
a disguise as a dragon? Okay, let's
be very clear. It turns him and transforms him into
a dragon. Into a copper
dragon for 15 minutes.
Yeah, I can save this for special dragon
occasions. So yeah, so yeah so gum gum's just
gonna ask for disguise help so you're not drinking it you're gonna go with a disguise just to be
clear okay kyborg do we get to you nope i need help i can speak draconic actually uh i want to
say to who's helping us duncan duncan duncan i say to him in draconic make me into a dragon dude
you don't you don't meow it yeah meow yeah meow meow and then i indicate
to my face and then i like make dragon
like body describe it for our
our audio listeners i'm putting my hands up
and i'm like making claws with my hands i'm going
but i this is all in cat though
duncan turns to the rest of the party says
is he okay did something happen
i'm not aware of meow meow meow meow meow
he got assigned some homework that he has
to work on and so if you could just,
while he's doing that,
turn him into a dragon.
The timer's actually up.
I'm just trying.
I'm being a little difficult.
You?
No.
I do have the cloak of manifolds
but that's only like,
I can transform my cloak
so I can make it like,
scaly looking
but I don't think
that that's going to suffice.
Okay.
Yeah, that sounds good.
Everyone happy with their disguises
and they know what they look like
And what they're doing here
Yeah
Do I look good, Bart?
Let me see, give me a spin
360
Oh yeah, you better work
I'm a dragon
Scary
A small scout ship draws close
And you hear a voice call out
Halt! Prepare to be boarded
Okay
Common or draconic?
Incommon
Okay
Two silver dragonborn scouts board the
Jebediah and begin walking around.
First one says, I'm Nikotimad.
This is Gyupo. We're gonna be
making sure everything is above boards here.
Mud's nervous and salutes.
I've just now connected the dots.
This is where the
Tabulians were outcast from.
So these guys are kind of like racist.
Oh. Nikototima sees your salute
and says to you mud what business do you have in totoan waters pleasure
your business is pleasure yes sir uh vacation okay yeah then gyupo addresses the group at large and
asks are any of you of draconic blood?
If so, please step to this side.
And he indicates the starboard side of the ship.
I walk over there like all dragon-like.
Make a performance check.
Okay, all right.
Why did you have to add spice?
Seven.
Oh, no.
Oops.
Are you crawling like a kitty still?
No, like a dragon.
He starts trying to slither like a snake.
Yeah, the Nikotima and Gyupo both watch you as you walk across the starboard side.
Does anyone else go over there?
I will go.
Okay.
And Dr. Ahem and Duncan make their way to the starboard side as well.
They might as well.
Okay.
Bart, you too, I assume?
Of course.
Should I do a performance check?
If you walk
like a dragon i'm walking like a dragon all right let's see it he's gonna show up kyborg 14 not the
best but okay better than kyborg they they it seems like they don't notice you because they're
so fixated on watching kyborg i literally rolled a 2 and i still had a 14 what yeah i have a plus
12 to my performance oh my god that is insane yeah which is why I was just like I'm not going to fail it.
Nikotima addresses the entire boat
and says, is there anyone else requesting
entry into Tatora or
is it only this group here?
No one else seems to come forward.
And Gyupo is going up to Ichi
and asking, what items are you bringing with you?
Just my personal belongings, sir.
I just awkwardly hold
up Gumbo in two hands in front of me.
Lunch.
A fresh snack.
Very well.
Bess, I kiss him.
Gumbo.
Gumbo.
Gumbo.
Okay.
Bess had a very confused look on his face.
He's custom in this land. You know, it's like when you go to Europe, you do little kisses on the cheek. That's why on his face. Guppo. He's custom in this land.
You know, it's like when you go to Europe, you do little kisses on the cheek.
That's why I do that with Guppo.
Yeah, you know, you go up, you show your passport.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Thank you.
Welcome to Germany.
Nico Tima begins rummaging through his pack and says,
I will be administering the draconic blood test to all of you seeking entry into the borders of Tatora.
I will require a blood sample from each of you.
He goes up to Duncan and pricks his finger
and drops a little drop of blood
into a vial of dragon scales.
And nothing seems to happen.
I says, very well, you pass.
He goes up next to, I'm going to roll, see.
What's the thing that happens that shows this person that we're passing?
Like, is it like a thing?
Make an intelligence check for me.
Okay, 15.
It didn't look like there was any reaction at all when the blood hit the vial of dragon scales.
Okay.
You suspect that no reaction is a passing reaction. Gotcha.
Because you rolled a 15.
You used your thinker box and figured it out.
Nico, Timae, goes up to
Bart next and
asks you to put your finger out so he can prick it.
I put my finger
out, but at the same time I cast
Minor Illusion to
make it seem like nothing happens.
When he does the test when he does the
test okay so you still let him prick your finger you let the blood go into the vial and you try to
just make it seem like all good yeah yeah that's interesting kind of thing how this okay first of
all make a slider hand check uh i want to re-roll that i'm using my inspiration okay all right 17
okay yeah you uh use your minor illusion to make the vial appear like nothing happens.
And the blood touches the dragon scales, and it seems like nothing happens.
And Nicoteme looks at it strangely.
This vial is very warm.
And looks at you.
I'm warm-blooded.
Wait, no.
We're not.
We're cold-blooded, right?
We're reptiles?
We had a very spicy lunch.
Yes.
Tabasco sauce on everything.
Yes.
I say, dragon mic.
All right.
He goes up next to Gum-Gum.
Hi.
Please extend your finger so we can administer the test.
I do it.
I am Lump-Lump, the great flower dragon wizard.
Okay. And I hold flower dragon wizard. Okay.
And I hold out my finger.
Okay.
He pricks your finger and a little drop of blood comes out and falls into the vial onto the scales and it immediately bursts into flames.
Ah, I told you it would happen.
I am a great wizard.
Of flowers.
Of flowers.
Not fire.
No.
Wizard.
Of flowers.
Of flowers.
Not fire.
No.
Guppo and Nikotima look at each other and says, an imposter.
What?
Where?
Sees him.
Guppo pulls out a war horn and blows it.
Letting out a loud bellowing.
I quickly go to stuff my hand into the war horn.
Make a dexterity check.
Yeah, I'm using literally my waste of time right now.
Is he?
Oh, okay.
I am taking that war horn and grabbing it.
It's a very muffled sound.
You know, when you're trying to like blow a horn.
It's stuff.
We're on a ship, right?
Yeah, but there's another ship.
The scout ship had pulled up.
Okay, so he's the only one from that ship on our ship. There's two of them.
Nikotime and Gyupo.
Right, right, right.
Can I just run and jump off the side of the ship?
No, get them.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, you could jump off the side of the ship if you want.
What would that accomplish?
I run and jump off the side of the ship.
While I do it, can I try and do my,
attach my friendship bracelets to something against the ship or something?
Oh, I got it.
I attach my friendship bracelet using the immovable rod to this edge of the ship.
Why not just hold onto the rod?
I guess that would work too.
I was going to...
Yeah, I'll do that.
Okay, I'll tell you what.
At the very least,
the Kotee Man and Gyopo pull out their weapons,
even though their horn did not sound.
Bye-bye.
They arm themselves with silvery blades.
Everyone go ahead and roll initiative.
Oh.
I had a whole plan with everything in my mechanical arm.
Well, we're going to hear about it in the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.
Sorry, I'm not dragon.
Nat, 20 initiative roll.
Now I've got to remember these.
You said roll for initiative.
They'll be in the log.
Oh, that's true.
I rolled a 14 in case you want to write 22.
All right.
Well, find out what everyone rolled in the next episode of Killing the Stinky Giant.
Bye.
Bye. Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye. I have to point out that I realized something.
I was re-listening to an episode to try to,
I've been trying to track down my inventory
and I was listening to an episode
and Micah, who does the voice of Dr. Ahem,
you chimed in and it immediately struck me
that you sounded, this is going to be such a deep dive,
but if you go Google this,
you will know exactly what I'm talking about.
He sounds like the animatronic professor
from Knott's Berry Farm in the time travel dinosaur ride.
As you walked into the ride.
It's a deep cut.
It is.
But like, like I could play it right now for you guys.
So you guys can hear it.
I've never been to Knott's Berry Farm.
It's Kingdom of the Dinosaurs.
It's Kingdom of the Dinosaurs.
And here's.
Yeah, I already had it pulled up.
Here's the intro of the ride.
Wait for it.
They're walking in.
How did you people get in here?
Stop.
The time machine is on. It's finished yet. I'm still working on my time machine. They're working. wait for it they're walking yeah absolutely we we went on to that theme park so much as kids and i love that ride because i
love dinosaurs as most little boys did yeah and as soon as that it just took me back and
you said exactly like that.
I'm still working on my time machine.