Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Of Life & Breath - Ep. 78 - The Quarterling Vs. The Shaddo Queen

Episode Date: January 4, 2023

Everything in Tetora has led to this - the Infinights take on Inku the Shaddo Queen and the fate of someone dear to the party hangs in the balance. Check out our merch and follow us on Twitter, Insta...gram, TikTok and more: https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStinkyDragon Shout Out to our Voice Actors for this episode: Inku - Raquel Lily (@RaquelLily) Hugh Männer - Trevor Collins (@_TrevorC) Bo-Link - Joe Lee (@theloejeez) Omar Finn - Jacob Fullerton (@_jacobfullerton) Simsun Finn - Blizzbear (@blizzb3ar) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a Rooster Teeth Production. our latest libation, Zero Forks Given. It's a mixture of tail-spine tequila, devil-sight cider, porcupinian pulp, topped with nectar from the nine hells, one of which is saying porcupinian. One mouthful of this fiendish refresher and you'll be brimming with brimstone. Previously, our adventurers absconded away in the Ahemobile to seek aid from ancient dragons. While making their way up Mount Sayomoto, the party shielded themselves from shards of shadow, deftly defied a draconic draft, and kept a lethal landslide at arm's length. Eventually they and the elders summoned dragons of old, breathing fire and cold. They learned of a long-forgotten legend, finally fulfilled by none other than Bart the Quarterling.
Starting point is 00:01:06 After Bart finally caught his draconic breath, the party splashed into the Shadow Mane where they encountered Inku, Hugh Manor, and Bart's imprisoned parents. Cobble a cocktail, let's stink up a smelly saga. I told Trevor about what happened on the last episode. And he was so confused because he's not caught up at all on the show. He was just like, wait, your parents are what? He's like, are you half halfling yeah he's kind of like quarterling quarterling yeah it's math that's the best things about dnd improv and math yeah it was very funny i had a nightmare the other day about recording tales from the stinky dragon where i was reading the intro and like halfway through i realized i wasn't doing a good job at doing the voice and i
Starting point is 00:02:02 wasn't very enthusiastic about it and i I was like, oh, this sucks. Like, it's not going well. I'm not doing a good job. You do a great job. You are. I don't think we praise Gus enough. No, no, no. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Legitimately. I was uncomfortable. He is fidgeting more. He's shrinking in his chair. I just think like we don't give enough praise for how good of a DM Gus is. Like he's he's great at letting us kind of go with things but also keeping us on track and like keeping to the story there's a lot to juggle as a dm and it's like man i have a lot of appreciation there's a lot to juggle but i have uh micah and ben helping me i do i cannot take uh all the praise for that like any stretch of the imagination
Starting point is 00:02:36 you're a special special boy we stuck in that nightmare for a while no it was it was very quick. I forgot about it until I was reading this right now. And I was like, oh, dream PTSD. I had a dream about making puppets the other day. I couldn't get. We were trying to make one of the puppets, like do some sort of elaborate move. Stunt is similar. I forgot about till you just mentioned it.
Starting point is 00:03:00 And we were doing it over and over. And I was stressing out about it. Trying to get the pupp to like, correctly. That is my nightmare. My living nightmare. It's funny when you get so invested in D&D, but it's work. And it invades your dream. It's like, it's such a weird, a weird thing to have.
Starting point is 00:03:20 You dive into the black abyss, splash, and everything goes dark. In the distance, you hear the rumbling of thunder and the rustling of wind as a cold sweat comes over you. After a moment, your eyes adjust to the darkness. Before you is a black igneous rock path dimly lit by a swirling portal behind you. The path quickly crumbles to an end and drops into a murky pool of purple fluid with several jagged rocks protruding the surface. One sizable crag of black rock stands in the center of the pool with a set of stairs leading up to a spiked throne of black spires. A shadowy and slender long-haired woman with pointed ears and indigo eyes sits on the throne. You instinctively look around and spot two details amidst the darkness. First, to the north,
Starting point is 00:04:00 your left, you spot a small box made of bones precariously sitting on the edge of a craggy rock overlooking a waterfall of purple fluid falling into blackness. Second, you look past Inku on her throne and spot three obscured shadowy figures. It looks like a halfling, a dragonborn, and a human. Welcome, Bartholomew. You're right on time. Inku stands up from a spiny throne in the center of the pool. A veil of darkness drapes her gaunt figure. A thin smile curls along her black lips as she waves her spindly fingers at you. I'm waiting.
Starting point is 00:04:31 Her eyes narrow. Hmph. I thought you would have learned some manners by now. A mysterious voice chimes in. I agree. Manners are everything, my dear. But I suppose we can simply chalk that one up to bad parenting. All the way across the purple pool, you spot a middle-aged man in a tattered top hat slink out from the shadows.
Starting point is 00:04:54 He's wearing a black suit, a red ascot, sporting a well-groomed Van Dyke beard. Hugh Manner. There's no way they didn't script that encounter. They're like, all right, first I'm going to say manners. And then Hugh Manners, you come in and you say a thing about manners. Nerds! Is this in character? Yes, absolutely.
Starting point is 00:05:13 I don't get it. It feels like it's been ages since I've seen the four of you, doesn't it? Oh, yes, dear Infinites. I remember you. I will admit, you may have found success in the past, but my eyes were always on the future. Quite right, my dear. But in this place? She waves her skeletal hand around. Time stands still, and without the light of day, it can feel like an eternity. Can it, Bart?
Starting point is 00:05:45 Inku snaps her fingers and two shadowy figures are unveiled beside Hugh Manor. They're bound and gagged by inky black vines, a ginger-haired halfling and a golden dragonborn. Looks like I'll finally have the full set of the Finn family! Inku snaps her fingers again and this time you notice an indigo ring shimmer on her left hand. A familiar Shadrow appears next to her. Bolink! Retrieve the halfling and the die gems! Yes, my queen. And what of the others? What Entropa doesn't know won't hurt him.
Starting point is 00:06:17 With pleasure, my queen. Bolink vanishes into a veil of shadows and a handful of shajar emerge flanking your positions. Everyone roll initiative. I try snapping my fingers. It seems to do something. Is this the first time Bart is finding out that he's half dragonborn? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:06:33 Is it? I think it might be. Which one's the, is the... Like which one's the mom, which one's the dad? Or which one, yeah. Which one's the mom is what I'm asking. You would have to ask them. They both appear to be male.
Starting point is 00:06:45 Oh. Oh. You said parents, yeah? Yes. Okay. is what I'm asking. You would have to ask them. They both appear to be male. Oh, you said parents, yeah? Yes. Okay, I got questions. I thought they were a throuple. I like this, but I got questions. Yeah, roll initiative. 17. 23.
Starting point is 00:06:55 What a good roll from Bart. Bart, you've been really killing the initiative rolls lately. What's your secret? I don't know because I never like going first. That's why I noticed that you're going first frequently. I don't know, because I never like going first. That's why I noticed that you're going first frequently. I like everyone else setting things up and maybe taking some damage off some people,
Starting point is 00:07:12 so I could come in and just go, yeah. Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's modifiers. 17. 11. Gum Gum and Kyborg, which of you has the higher dexterity? I have plus five. Wait, no, 20.
Starting point is 00:07:26 Mine's 14. Okay. What can I roll to figure out if Mud knows if dragonborns are born out of eggs? I want to know if Bart was born out of an egg. That would be nature. That's weird. Can I roll for that? Yeah, go for it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:07:42 What came first, the egg or the Bart? Or the farts? Seven. You're, go for it. Okay. What came first, the egg or the Bart? Or the Farts? Seven. You're the worst druid. Yes. I've said this from the beginning that I'm not nature-based. It's intelligence, and I'm not high in intelligence. For some reason, druids, the most valuable modifier is wisdom,
Starting point is 00:07:57 but nature is where that comes, is intelligence. You know 100% for a fact, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Bart came from an egg. I knew it. Hey, guys. I don't know if you know of a doubt, that Bart came from an egg. I knew it. Hey, guys. I don't know if you know this, but Bart was born out of an egg. You were born out of an egg? Is it because my yolks are so good?
Starting point is 00:08:12 Oh, God. I crack you guys up all the time. It's clearly because you are yoked. Oh. Bart flexes. As you flex Bart, you realize that you have many enemies in front of you and around you could I roll for intimidation since I'm already flexing yeah we can intimidation roll I'll give you an advantage I already have advantage on those oh is because the gem I think so so a 19 and then a
Starting point is 00:08:37 rolling again because that was a one all right so 19 is the higher one oh Bart you look really scary the ferocious quarterling maybe it's new, like the new found powers you have that have been unlocked in you, but you're feeling extra ripped today. Extra, extra beefy. As if that was possible. Now roll for deception on that. Kyborg subtly holds one of his biceps. That's pretty big.
Starting point is 00:09:02 You only have one bicep. Yeah. What do you want to do about all these, all these baddies all right so we have uh inkyu yeah you manner and then how many shadros you rolled a pretty good perception check uh three three shadros okay so we're fighting them oh and don't forget bolink disappeared disappeared okay you recognize him he was the one that was um he kept going after the elder nam. Elder Namiro, correct. And he voiced by our friend Joe Lee. Oh, Joe does it?
Starting point is 00:09:28 Yeah. That's fun. All right. Well, let me start things off by casting a cloud of daggers. Are any of the Shadrows like bunched up anywhere? They're kind of spaced out. So remember, Inku's on a throne, kind of in the distance in front of you. Then you can see one Sh one shadow off to your left, perched on some craggy rocks,
Starting point is 00:09:49 one in the path in front of you, and then the other one is off to the right, perched on some other rocks. I'm going to put this cloud of daggers right over Inku's head. Okay. What's the range on cloud of daggers, just to verify?
Starting point is 00:09:59 60 feet. Yeah, sure. I have to zoom out to see all the maps. I have to like really look, get close to see the grid. I'm double laughing because I'm watching you guys to get within four inches of your screen to read something. While also to my left,
Starting point is 00:10:11 Blaine is getting within four inches of his screen to try to read something in one of his spells because you both are blind. It's not that I'm trying to read it. The grids are so small at this magnification level. I can't see them. So you're just trying to see if we actually. Just trying to make sure you're 12 squares away from Inko. And yes. I can't see them. So you're just trying to see if we actually... Just trying to make sure
Starting point is 00:10:25 you're 12 squares away from Inku, and yes. Okay, so that reaches. I'm going to cast it at the fourth level. Just why not? Yes. So that does 28 points of damage.
Starting point is 00:10:35 It would help if I looked up Inku's stats, huh? There it is. Maybe a little bit. 28 points of damage? Okay, so you conjure mystical blades of stabbing, and they appear over Inku doing 28 points of damage okay so you uh conjure mystical blades of stabbing uh and they appear over inkoo doing 28 points of damage let me guess she grabs each dagger out of the sky throws them at you yeah
Starting point is 00:10:53 right i'm getting clarification on clouded daggers which is a spell we've always gone back and forth on the damage occurs on inkoo's turn so i'll save that 28 well i thought it happened immediately i think we've been doing that. We've been giving Bart double damage. Oh, wow. Okay. It says a creature takes the slashing damage when it enters the spell's area for the first time.
Starting point is 00:11:12 Oh, first time on a turn or starts its turn there. Yeah. So when it starts its turn. Okay. Oh. So now that anyone's getting around it, it's just we've been doubling up on damage the first time in procs.
Starting point is 00:11:22 But I made a note here, 28 damage from cloud of death. Got it. Anything else, Bart? And then I also, just because I know this might get a little dicey. Hey. Hey-o. Can I cast...
Starting point is 00:11:40 That's your theme song? Mantle of Inspiration, which would give 11 temp HP to five creatures that I could see. And this is a bonus action. So yeah, you can absolutely do that. Num Nums, how many? 11.
Starting point is 00:11:58 So you guys get 11 temp HP to add. Oh, temp HP. Is anyone with us? Is it just... I think we do, don't we? Duncan? Is Duncan with us? Duncan, yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:08 No. Let's say Duncan left. Okay. He did not come through this portal. Yeah. Okay. Duncan was with us, but didn't come to the portal. Correct.
Starting point is 00:12:15 Okay, so I would just give it to our party. Yes. Do you want to give it to Inku as well? Absolutely not. No, you give it to Gumbo, right? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, Gumbo's a target?
Starting point is 00:12:21 Let me add him on here. No! John's laughing nervously. And does that give us our reaction or something? Yes. So each creature can immediately use its reaction to move up to its speed without provoking opportunity attacks as well.
Starting point is 00:12:36 Part of the mantle of inspiration. Sweet. So if you guys did want to move, I think you could do it now. I have an idea on move, but I think I'm next, so I'll maybe wait and then loop that in with my turn. No, you can immediately use your reaction.
Starting point is 00:12:50 I'm just saying I don't want to talk over Barbara's rest of their turn. Oh, gotcha, gotcha. I think I'm done. Okay. Yeah, I can't do much. I don't have, like, multiple attacks or anything like that. So who's next in your shift? Well, is anybody going to use their reaction? Yeah. Yeah, I'll use mine to move, I guess, towards... Are we surrounded?
Starting point is 00:13:06 Very loosely. It's not like anyone's right up on you. The closest Shadrow directly in front of you is probably 20 feet away. Okay. Portal's behind us. Portal behind you. The two other Shadrow off to the left, off to the right. Inku was probably barely in the 60-foot range in the distance beyond the Shadrow in front of you.
Starting point is 00:13:23 I guess if I use my reaction, do I just use my walking speed or can i run to make it you can move your speed so you cannot double move it's just whatever your your base speed is i'll move 40 feet towards her you would pass by a shadrow who's about 20 feet in front of you and so if you walk past it you would provoke an attack of opportunity i walk around it out i walk around him at 40 feet of range you can but it wouldn't necessarily get you any closer to inkoo because then now you're not taking a direct route yeah but i'll be on the other side of them right yes do you want to go to the left which is north or to the right which is south i guess left so just to clarify reclarify
Starting point is 00:13:59 the way that it is there is like a purple liquid pool kind of on the floor beyond the first shadow in front of you and that's where the throne is sticking up out of and that's where those rocky cracks are sticking out of the shadow are on so you can move those 40 you will end this reaction turn wading through this purpley liquid don't do it um then i guess i'll get to the edge of the purple liquid yeah i guess move me however close I can get without getting my purple good. So it would be... So, okay, the reason I'm kind of saying all this is
Starting point is 00:14:32 that would end up putting you right next to the shad draw that's in front of you. I know you're trying to get around it. The best move you have would put you right next to it without ending your turn in the liquid. You have abilities like jump and all your other stuff, but since you can only move right now, you're going to end up next to this thing.
Starting point is 00:14:46 All right, I'll move right to it, but without being within opportunity attack. So like 10 feet away or so. Just that way. Well, five is melee range. So 10 feet away. Gus has played this interaction out a million ways. Nature, you die.
Starting point is 00:15:00 Except one. Okay, we'll say you're kind of just a little to the north of it. Okay. All right. Anybody else want to use their reaction to move? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:07 So I want to line up two people, but is it possible to line up two targets in a way that they're within 30 feet of one another? Mike and I both immediately start pointing to the map. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:18 You can pull out your... Protractors. Protractors. Yeah, yeah. Encompasses and such. Yeah. I think you could probably line up that first Shadra who's on the path in front of you
Starting point is 00:15:28 that Gum-Gum was kind of by and Inku who's further behind. That's probably about 30 feet away and you could line those up. Okay, and then with going that distance, is that going to put me at disadvantage for ranged attacks with that person, the Shadra? No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:15:44 You can move a little bit to the east from your position, not much, like 10 feet maybe, and line that up pretty easily. All right, then I want to do that. Okay, so you just make a small move a little to the east away from the party for that. Mud, you want to move, or are you good? No. No, Mud wants to stay.
Starting point is 00:16:00 Okay, and that was it for you, right, Bart? Yes. I did my bonus action, so I can't move, right? You can move. I can? Yeah, because you cast a spell, you did a bonus action, you still have a move action. So you mentioned there's like a chest of bones or like something made out of bones? Yeah, it's kind of like precariously on a little outcropping by a waterfall to the northeast.
Starting point is 00:16:19 Kind of, you know how I mentioned there's one shadrow to the left on a rocky outcrogging to the north? Croggy? Craggy. It's kind of behind that, maybe another 25, 30 feet behind it. Could I move towards that without getting too close to someone so they would attack me? Yeah, you can actually kind of north, kind of like a little further north of where Gum-Gum was, where he ended his turn, there's a little more of an outcrop. And it would put you closer to that Shadrow to the north, but you're still like 15 feet away,
Starting point is 00:16:45 and then the box is a little further behind it. Okay, I want to move over there. Okay, so all of you kind of, except for Mud, kind of shift a little bit to the north, northeast position-wise. Cool. Okay, it is one of the Shadrow's turn, the one to the north, actually,
Starting point is 00:16:57 the one that you all moved kind of towards. Okay. Sorry, quick question, but also where are the, my quote-unquote parents tied up? Quote-unquote. They are past Inku, kind of to the southeast. Okay, quick question, but also where are the, my quote unquote parents tied up? They are past Inku, kind of to the southeast. Okay, thank you. Where are they? And Bart, so sorry.
Starting point is 00:17:14 They should be sorry. They abandoned me. Did they? Well, I don't know. Your parents would never abandon you. I guess I just like, I don't know if these are like my actual biological parents who put me up for adoption or people who adopted me. There's a lot of questions, aren't there? They just stay together for the kids.
Starting point is 00:17:35 No, that's been 22 so. The start by Gum Gum and the finish up by Chris. Chris's finger guns to me were great too. Okay, so it's that Shadrow that y'all kind of moved to. It's going to make an attack on... Who should we do? Mud is not close. So Kyborg, GumGum, and Bart are all close.
Starting point is 00:17:57 It's going to make an attack on... Make a roll to see. Make a roll. That sounds yummy. Or just the thing where he doesn't want to get called on on class, so he kind of looks down and scratches his head. Well, it must work because the Shadrow decides to make an attack
Starting point is 00:18:12 on Gum Gum. You shouldn't be that enthusiastic about it. What's your name? I'm Gum Gum. Well, you're not quite close enough. It's going to make a ranged attack. It decides to fire on you, hitting a C. What what's it firing it's a shard of blackness from if you all actually had some of these fired at you before just like from its hand
Starting point is 00:18:33 yeah yeah okay uh hitting ac20 so that's gonna hit um i do have a question that shield the dragon scale do we need to have that equipped in order? Okay, I saw Mike just responded. We don't have to have it equipped. Equipped? Equipped. I like equipped. Equipped. No. He's saying that as GumGum. So you got clarification on what you need? Yeah. Okay. So AC20,
Starting point is 00:18:58 you said that is a hit? Yes. You take 17 points of piercing damage. And I need you to make me a... God, a wisdom saving throw. This'll go well. Mm-hmm. Bye, Gum-Gum.
Starting point is 00:19:11 You're gonna lose this sanity. Ha! Ugh. 14. I guess you're not used to taking damage when you're not raging, so it's really ouchy. It really hurts. Oh.
Starting point is 00:19:21 And Gum-Gum falls down, is knocked prone. Whoops. You slipped. Sensing weakness, the Shadrow decides to make a second attack at you, Gum-Gum. Hitting AC 18. That doesn't hit. Whoa. Because I have that shield equipped currently.
Starting point is 00:19:41 If I use it as a shield, it gives me plus two AC. No, it's not a regular shield. It's just a one-time use magic item you can use as a reaction to being attacked or frightened. Okay. Okay, that's what I was, yeah. I was saying, because if we needed to equip it
Starting point is 00:19:51 as a shield at all, like, or could we use it just as a shield? No, it's just got those abilities you're talking about. Okay, well then, then it would hit. What if I,
Starting point is 00:19:59 if I use Mom Arm on Gum Gum? Mom Arm? You know, when like you're driving in a car and you come to a really abrupt stop and your mom puts her arm out in front of you as if that's going to stop you from getting hurt. I demonstrated on John.
Starting point is 00:20:13 Gum Gum, Bart's stopping short. Okay, that hits. So, Bart, does your mom arm take the damage instead? No, I'm good. That's where the care ends. Yeah. You take an additional 19 points of piercing damage. Make another wisdom saving throw.
Starting point is 00:20:31 Do it. The wisest of the wizards. You know what? Gus has been having such a hard time with battles and stuff. I'm kind of glad Gus is getting some hits this time, okay? He needed some. Talk to me again in about 30 minutes. 10.
Starting point is 00:20:42 Yeah, we'll see how you feel later. Yeah, we'll see. Oh my God, Gum- Gum Gum, you're blind. Again? Is his hat down? So blind and prone. Yes. And just took a good amount of damage.
Starting point is 00:20:55 Only 19 plus. 19 plus the first one. Yeah, it was a bit. But on the bright side, that's it for that Shadrow. Kyborg, what do you want to do? Your friend, in air quotes, is prone and reaching around blindly. Is this the Shadrow that is in line with Inku? No. No, this is a different Shadrow.
Starting point is 00:21:16 No, the one that currently fired is the one most to the north. The one that's in line with Inku is the one kind of in the center that was in front of you to begin with. Okay. I wonder if I should just start dealing damage to the boss. I mean, are we playing... From a meta perspective, the one that attacked Gum-Gum has already had its turn. So we'll not be attacking again for another round.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Okay. Just go with what you wanted to go with. You had a plan. Execute plan. All right. So I pull out the long bow of Chris, longer bow of Kristalina and I fire. But I also want to do a
Starting point is 00:21:48 arcane shot. Arcane shot. Piercing arrow creates a line one foot wide and 30 foot long, and each creature in that line must make a deck saving throw. On failure, a creature takes damage from the arrow
Starting point is 00:22:05 plus 1d6 extra piercing damage. Cool. Okay, let's take care of the regular damage first, and then we'll take care of that save and the extra stuff. Okay. What do you say when you shoot it? Oh, do I have to say something? Just me being curious.
Starting point is 00:22:17 Since it's a railgun, do you have a good eraser line? Or another Blink-182 song reference. I say, watch your manners! And then I stick my tongue out at Hugh Manor. Despite his... Mind your manners. We're probably doing better, but okay. Nope, watch your manners.
Starting point is 00:22:33 Watch your manners. That's cyborg. I can't see. All right, so I fire the longer bow. Oh, no. Rolled a one. He rolled a one. That's okay.
Starting point is 00:22:46 Do you have luckies? Yeah, I got an inspiration battle roll that. Man, do you have a plus 13 on your attack roll? Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, I know. How? Because I'm the best there ever was. 20! Just for clarification, that was a 7. Plus 13, 20. I don't want people thinking it's a critical.
Starting point is 00:23:02 Okay, 20. Not a natural 20. Yes, that hits. If it wasn't a 20, it'd be a 33 want people thinking it's a critical. Okay, 20. Not a natural 20. Yes, that hits. If it wasn't a 20, it'd be a 33. I think it's a natural. I roll that. It's 1d8 plus 7. That's 14. And this is on the Shadrach, correct? Well, I'm trying to figure out whether or not that
Starting point is 00:23:17 arrow carries that damage to the next person as well. I'm pretty sure it does. I see what you're saying. Let's take a look. The piercing arrow. Does the piercing arrow take all the damage through or just specific piercing arrow damage? I'm going to make an executive decision and say it takes all the damage. On a failure, the creature takes damage from the arrow
Starting point is 00:23:33 plus 1d6 extra piercing damage, half damage on success. So we're going to tally the damage. We're going to treat it first on this Shadrach and then we'll do the saves and then determine how much carries on to Inku. Okay. So 14. Plus. And that's piercing damage, correct? Yeah. It's kisses damage.
Starting point is 00:23:51 And then I'm rolling a d6. You need an arrow that kisses so that you can send your wife over to people and like just attack them. I forgot about kissy kiss. Wait. Dang it. Two for the additional damage. Plus two. That's not worth it.
Starting point is 00:24:06 Who knows? Maybe that was the final damage you needed for something to be triggered. Yeah. Listen, sometimes Bart and I, casting our spells, just completely miss our spells. So you did something. Just speak for yourself, Bart. I said sometimes. Bart's perfect.
Starting point is 00:24:20 Bart's never tried to put someone to sleep and they haven't gone to sleep. Hey, you know. Sometimes people just have a lot of caffeine during the day and they're not ready to go night-night. Okay, so 16 points of total damage. Okay, so first I'll make the dexterity saving throw for the Shadrow. Okay. What save do they need to make? DC12.
Starting point is 00:24:37 Okay, they have plus eight. Oh, my God. DC12's low. Yeah, sure is. It is low. That is a nat 20. So it only ends up taking one point of damage from the extra D6. Okay.
Starting point is 00:24:49 Really? I would roll lucky, but it's just not worth it. No, no, no, no, no. It's not worth it. All right. And now Inku's dexterity save. We have a plus 45. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:59 Inku's not very dexterous. He's just trying to get my hopes up so we can break him. Roll a 16. that's an 18 which makes so half damage okay so you rolled a total of 16 damage so half of it goes through okay so they get eight points first person takes the full first person takes the full half from the d6 uh and then ink who takes half overall so in total you did a fair amount of damage okay they're trying to make you feel better. Yeah. Well, you got like five more attacks,
Starting point is 00:25:27 so do them. Okay. I'm just going to do a longer bow shot at the Shadrow that's in front of me. Okay. We just put out a skit on social media. I think it was a week or two ago of us making fun of the whole, like when you're last in initiative
Starting point is 00:25:41 and it feels like it takes a lifetime. And that was your turn. 100% born out of playing with Kaiba. A 20 does hit the shot. Okay. Do we? 13 points. All right.
Starting point is 00:25:55 It takes 13 points of piercing damage from your magical arrow fired by the longer bow of Kristalina. Woohoo. All right. And then I'm going to take another shot. Right in the kisser. How many do you get?
Starting point is 00:26:05 Three. I hate this. 22. That hits. Doing 10 points. You're hurting my guys. Bart yells across the room and goes, It's all the small things really build up
Starting point is 00:26:18 to make a big difference, Kyborg. She called your thing small. Or he called your thing small. Anything else, Kyborg? No, I'm good. Wow, okay. Yeah, I'm going to hold. I think what I need to do is I need to find what this, like, what the weakness is before I really start blowing stupid amounts of damage.
Starting point is 00:26:38 I imagine you just powering up right now and then it fading back in because you decided not to. That's exactly right. This is only a percentage of my fraction of my power. Gum gum, where did the world go? I don't know. And then I'll, gum gum, and there's rage.
Starting point is 00:26:56 I'll roll my rage die for eight, which is a bolt of light shoots from your chest. Another creature of your choice that you can see within 30 feet of you must succeed on a constitution saving throw or take 1d6 radiant damage. And I can use it as a bonus action until then.
Starting point is 00:27:13 So what happens when I'm blind? Or prone. You can't see anything, so. We determined. I knew he was going to argue with you. Yeah. At the last one, it just shot out whenever we were in that darkness.
Starting point is 00:27:23 I think you aimed it yourself, if I recall. It just shot in front of me. Yeah, because that might hit some of us. So if that's how we handled it before, I will say, since you're prone, there's nothing in front of you for it to shoot out and hit. Set up a flare, Gum-Gum. If he's prone, he just shoots it into the ground and kind of bumps up a little bit. Maybe that's enough power to lift him, Gus.
Starting point is 00:27:42 Or if he's on his back, he shoots it to the ceiling and unlodges a stalactite that comes down and impales you. What a way to go. Well, I'll use half my movement to stand up. Okay. Ooh, I like it when the players do their research. And then...
Starting point is 00:28:00 Alright, nerd. And then... Get my, nerd. And then... Am I right here? Okay, the thing that attacked me, am I aware of where it is? It was a ranged attack. Yeah, it was a ranged attack. Roughly, you do. So if I went after it...
Starting point is 00:28:15 You could try, like, what were you thinking? Like, trying to close the distance? Yeah, close the distance, then attack it. So if you were to try to attack from range, I would say you have disadvantage because you're blind. Yeah, I do have, yeah. Or have blinded thank you for agreeing with me uh you're trying to close the distance uh i would say you could try and i would roll a die and give you like 50 50 as to whether or not you end up in the right place you think you do okay and then even if you do close to melee
Starting point is 00:28:40 then it's still disadvantage okay well i guess i'll do that and uh try and close the distance i feel like i have a pretty good idea of where it was because i just fell back i don't know do you want i'm gonna roll a d4 which do you want to be good evens or odds evens even's good i rolled a four yes you closed the distance correctly if you rolled a three you would have killed me uh and uh yeah you know, you have, I guess all your time training and fighting, you've really honed your skills and you know, you remember you have a
Starting point is 00:29:12 mental image of the entire layout of the battlefield and you charge at the Shadrow who fired at you. A mental image of the entire layout of the battlefield, but like a five-year-old's crayon drawing. Yeah, I like that. I can see everything. And then I will attack.
Starting point is 00:29:29 Do you know Kung Fu as well? I know Fu. I know Fu. I will recklessly attack that thing that shot me. Okay, so recklessly attacking gives you advantage on your attack, but gives them advantage when attacking you. So since you have disadvantage because of blindness and advantage with reckless attack, you them advantage when attacking you. So since you have disadvantage
Starting point is 00:29:45 because of blindness and advantage with reckless attack, you just roll a normal attack. Just try to hit the shadrow that messed you up. What's up with them bones? Them dry bones? I'm gonna try to get over there. That hits. And I have my new axe
Starting point is 00:30:01 equipped. Equipped. Too bad there's no skellingtons here. That's why I was asking new axe equipped. What them bones? Equipped. Too bad there's no skeletons here. That's why I was asking about them bones. Skeletons. On a hit, the wielder can choose one of the following as a bonus action. Well, if I use my rage, is that a bonus action? As a bonus action, yes.
Starting point is 00:30:16 So yeah, you have already used your bonus action. Yeah, yeah, to rage. Okay, well then, I'll roll for damage. Roll that beautiful bean damage. Get out of the way, stupid window. It's me, Clippy. I hear you're trying to kill a Shadrach. Do you think that Shadrach's like,
Starting point is 00:30:32 don't waste your time on me. Come on. I wish I knew more Blink-183 songs. I just don't. What's my age again? That's 17. Plus my rage, so 20. 20 points of slashing damage.
Starting point is 00:30:50 That's an axe, right? Yeah. Okay. 20 points of damage to this Shadrach. Ouch. Do I hear him die? Oh, right. Die?
Starting point is 00:30:58 No, this is the first time he's been attacked. Okay. Well, then I will do it again. Recklessly. So are you saying if that guy had faked his own death,cklessly so sorry seeing if you heard that guy Hit the ground what if we all play dead well they stop attacking stiff and fall. That's a 22.
Starting point is 00:31:24 22. Only your first attack is reckless? When you make your first attack on your turn. I only rolled once. Let's do a second roll to see if that second attack hits. I'm at disadvantage. Would you say he's feeling this? Oh.
Starting point is 00:31:41 Well, that was a crit. Since you have disadvantage, we take the worst one, which is not the crit, which would still hit. I just have a list of Blink-182 songs open that I'm going to keep referencing the titles of during this episode. And that's eight points. Plus three, so 11. 11 points of damage.
Starting point is 00:31:57 Nice. Ouch. You hear the Shadrow's raggedy breath, so you know it's still alive. Give us a taste of that, guys. I need my inhaler. And I'm blinded and I'm trying, hey, hey, hey Bart, what's my age again?
Starting point is 00:32:15 Stop. 15, right? No, I think it's 16. Oh, happy birthday. Thank you, it was a while ago. It was a year ago. It was a year ago. It was at least two years ago. Anything else, Gum Gum?
Starting point is 00:32:30 No. All right. Why don't you go ahead and make me another wisdom throw to see if your sight is back. Saving throw? Yes. Show me the vision. Three. Three. Show me the not gonna happen two no i'm so sorry how does that happen like predicted that happening in my head
Starting point is 00:33:09 i was like he's gonna roll a three or lower as this one i still wanted it to happen what a waste of an inspiration time pleasant trees patrons of the stinky dragon Start the new year off by telling someone about the show. Make sure they follow us at Stinky Dragon Pod. We're on Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok. Plus, don't miss out on joining the lovely Stinky Dragon subreddit. Do you want to be part of the show? Then make a post on social media using hashtag Stinky Dragon Pod. We might name an NPC in the show after you.
Starting point is 00:33:47 Oh my God. All right. Is that it for you GumGum? Yeah, I can't see myself doing anything else. Oh god. He says, who's that? Well, what happens that he failed that? He's still blind. He's like trying to break the blindness. I didn't know if something else bad happened. No.
Starting point is 00:34:00 Okay, it's the Shadrow in the center's turn, the one that you lined up, that Kyber lined up the shot with. That was a saving throw? Yeah. Why? Get like advantage. I could use my unstable backlash because if I fail a saving throw, I can use my reaction to do another roll.
Starting point is 00:34:15 Do it, do it. All right, I'll do that. Gus is cool as it. I think you should get your reaction. So this is your reaction, which you've already used. Okay, gotcha. I just saw a star go over Gus's head with a rainbow
Starting point is 00:34:26 with the words, the more you know. Gus majored in rules. Oh, God. Yeah, but I went to a party college. He majored in rules. That was Gunga. Lining up that Shadrach. The Shadrach from the middle. It's mad at
Starting point is 00:34:41 Kyborg. Kyborg attacked it. You lined it up. What do you mean? What did you do? You just filled it with arrows. There's only two because the other one went through them. Yeah, but can he shoot with his arrow since I'm within melee range? Different one. Oh, yeah. And you're at the one at the north anyway.
Starting point is 00:34:55 What's it going to do? So Gum Gum's over there. Kyborg's over there. I'm just trying to, I'm building my own mental image. My own Gum Gum mental map. This one's going to fire one of those shards at Kyborg. Hits AC 19. I'm going to use that shield thing.
Starting point is 00:35:16 Really? I mean, it's going to blind me. Maybe. We can make a saving throw. Gus smirked as he said that. Do it. No, okay. Then I'll wait. I'll wait. I'll wait. I'll do the saving throw. Gus smirked as he said that. Do it. No, okay, then I'll wait. I'll wait. I'll wait. I'll do the saving throw. What is the DC on the saving throw?
Starting point is 00:35:30 I'll never tell. What's the saving throw? Well, hold on. Let me do my damage first. Let me do my thing. Do you guys all use dark mode on your D&D beyond? I do. I do. I'm a psycho who doesn't use dark mode. I switched Barbra's to dark mode once and then you noticed immediately he switched it noticed immediately because i also load your profiles and it's the same yeah oh so if you load
Starting point is 00:35:51 my profile and change it to dark mode it'll change on my computer it happened to you once before well sorry about that uh the shard hits you doing 12 points of damage uh kyborg and you need to make a wisdom saving throw here it comes the best saving throw ever i'm having a hard time this little that's a 12 nope nope 15 nope nope he's a melt he's uh he's got kind of a broken laptop right now use your finger god i feel like such a boomer it's funny on dnd beyond they call it under dark mode oh do they yeah that's funny what do they call the light version it's just default like it's only toggle under dark mode on Oh, do they? Yeah. That's funny. What do they call the light version? It's just default. Like, it's only toggle under dark mode on or off. And you said
Starting point is 00:36:27 wisdom saving throw? Yeah. Okay. DC 25. What? I'm kidding. Doesn't matter. I'm kidding. Doesn't matter. No, five, but I have the advantage on, uh... Saving throws? Yes, yes, yes. No, on constitution saving throws. Oh, unless...
Starting point is 00:36:44 Lady! I have another thing called Indomitable! You can reroll a saving throw that you fail. You must use the new roll. You can use this once for a long rest. So I'm gonna do that. I'm assuming that I just failed that saving throw. Oh, a five? Yeah, absolutely. Okay, alright.
Starting point is 00:36:58 You don't have to do so. What was that? Wisdom saving throw? 19! Oh, yeah, you take damage and you feel like a pain in your head and your vision kind of closing down to a point, but then it expands and you manage to keep your vision. Good. I go cross-eyed for a second and I'm like, oh no, my eyes! Just kidding!
Starting point is 00:37:17 I'm fine! Well, the shadrow does not look like it's kidding when it fires a second shot at you. Oh my god! Multi-attack, they multi-attack. 26. Is that the hit? Yeah, even with the shield thing, I can't. No.
Starting point is 00:37:30 No! I refuse. I use lucky. Oh. But I already queued up my damage. Okay, fine. Gus is sitting there going. Yeah, he wanted to give.
Starting point is 00:37:42 I just wanted to hit you guys. So I have to re-roll my attack roll? That's right. And I get to choose which dice. So, like, I re-roll one time? Yes. Okay, yeah. Yeah, you have three lucky points for long rest.
Starting point is 00:37:53 I'm just making sure because you said you got... Oh, I rolled better. 28. Oh, my God. Not a good day for the infinites. I'll take the 26. There you go. Alright.
Starting point is 00:38:09 All of a sudden we wake up and we're warming our bed and it was all a dream. Alright, you take 24 points of damage. I'm wearing that little sleep mask, which is why he's blind. And you must make another wisdom saving throw. Come on, man.
Starting point is 00:38:25 John, are we going to be in a situation where our whole party's blind except you and me? Yeah. You said 24? Damage? Yeah, 24. That hurts. That hurts real bad. All right, wisdom saving throw.
Starting point is 00:38:33 Well, you might take a little nap here. Well, that's what you roll, Kai. I can't see it from over here. Three. Ka-book-da-mighty. Lucky! I am lucky! How many of these like saving throw dice things that you have can you get rid of two out of three? I know you will also use that indomitable thing. Oh and so 14 With the failure yeah Come on.
Starting point is 00:39:01 Come on. He's got it. That's a failure. Yeah. Oh, my God. No. No. God.
Starting point is 00:39:11 You all made fun of us who have high wisdom modifiers. Okay, fine. I can work with this. I can make this work. I don't need to see to shoot a bow and arrow. You might be knocked prone. We'll see. I don't need to be standing up and see things to shoot a bow and arrow. Even is your eyes.
Starting point is 00:39:23 Odd is your feet. Oh. Oh. Odd. Yeah. The shard hits you and it knocks you prone. up and see things to shoot a bow and arrow even is your eyes odd is your feet oh oh odd yeah the shard hits you and it knocks you prone you fall and you're prone on the ground and i say yes your face down and your fist just comes up in the air like the end of breakfast like freeze frame on your hand this is the story of a lonely guy is that another blink reference they're so obscure i don't know i don't know i don't know blink yeah they're playing in austin uh july yeah it's only like six hundred dollars each ticket all right that was it for its turn so kyborg is prone over there gum gum is blind over there mud is mud really hasn't moved you're still at the same starting spot, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:05 Let's do it in a puzzle. Yeah, and then Bart has moved in that direction, thinking about them bones. Dead bones. Let me jump down bones. Wait, what bones? There were bones to the north. Like a boom chest. I was going to say box. Lots of bones. Okay. Is it Mud's turn finally? No, it is
Starting point is 00:40:22 not. Thank you for inquiring. It is Bo Link's turn finally? No, it is not. Thank you for inquiring. It is Bolink's turn. I thought he left. He disappeared. And he reappears behind Mud. Gosh, dang it. I smack him. Emerging from the shadows.
Starting point is 00:40:34 I smack him. He dodges it. You didn't even roll anything. He's good. You didn't either. He pulls out a short scythe. You already have inspiration die, right? I gotta save those.
Starting point is 00:40:53 Oh, no, you don't have an inspiration die. Oh, no, I used it! I used it! You got an inspiration die. That's a good job. Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd, Judd,, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Mud, Bye bye real HP. How much? 18 points of necrotic damage. So 11 plus 18? Yeah, 29. Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:41:27 Damage. And he takes a second slash with that scythe, hitting AC 16. Yo, I think that misses. Yes. No, it does not. I am very unarmored. What is your AC? It would be 15. It says 13 right now, but I'll explain why, but it's 15. 26 points of slashing damage.
Starting point is 00:41:46 In addition to the 18? Yeah. And 25 points of necrotic damage. 51? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Dragon scale for that last one. I'll use it.
Starting point is 00:41:58 Plus five AC would miss. Yes, that would miss. So then you don't take the last two damages I just said. So that was just a one-time thing, right? Yep. Yeah, he blew it. But hey, we're at block 51 points. I'll take it.
Starting point is 00:42:10 Yeah, it's a pretty good little shield. Yeah. And we each have one of those? Yes. Once. So we each have one, sorry. Right. Bolink looks at you with rage in his eyes, upset at you pulling that shield out and cheating
Starting point is 00:42:20 him from the damage that you wanted to cause. Go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw. I have advantage. That's only a 13, but this will be 16. 16. I think that's a success. You feel a core of fear and dread take root in your heart, but you managed to shake it off.
Starting point is 00:42:40 You felt like running away and hiding and abandoning your friends, but your senses got the better of you, and you stay and hold your ground. They were trying to make me afraid? Yeah. Okay. Mud's always thinking about abandoning his friends, though. It's just Monday. Monday.
Starting point is 00:42:57 Oh, nice. Well, it is Mud Day because it's Mud's turn. Hey. Mud, Mud, Mud. My turn. He's our man. Okay, so Bo Link is on my butt. So Mud's going to cast Summon Elemental Spirit.
Starting point is 00:43:13 And I'm going to cast it at a six level slot. And I'm going to summon a Water Elemental. They're my friend. And I want to summon them, I guess, right on them. Right next to Bo Link. Okay. And on them, right next to Bowling. Okay. And their initiative is right after mine. Okay.
Starting point is 00:43:30 So as a bonus action, Mud's going to, I was looking this up and then you called on me finally because I realized I wanted this for my bonus action. Bonus action, I want to use the Combat Wild Shape. Okay. And I'm going to turn into a polar bear. Ooh, it's like lost. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42.
Starting point is 00:43:50 There you go. Why do I still remember those numbers? It's so useless. I don't need that. I forget my youngest child's birthday sometime. If only it was 418. Yeah, I wish. Cool. So then the water elemental gets to go now and look really cool.
Starting point is 00:44:06 Why is D&D Beyond not working? I want to know what a polar bear is. It's like multiple screens pulled out for D&D Beyond. Well, because I got a lot of stuff to look up. I'll figure out what a polar bear does in a second. I'll help you. Thank you. So my water elemental gets to take three attacks.
Starting point is 00:44:19 That seems OP. It is, but I cast at level six. It takes as many multi-attacks as half the spell slot I use it at. So real fast, Polar Bear gets two attacks, one with bite, one with claw. Yeah, I'll find it. Okay. It's just the browser wasn't working. There it is.
Starting point is 00:44:33 I got it. Okay. Yeah, I remembered I had multi-attack, which is why I wanted to do it. And a good amount of temporary HP. So I slam into the space jam. Come on and slam. Okay. So you slam Bolink.
Starting point is 00:44:46 Yeah, so it's my hit die. No, wait, my attack is plus five. So it is D20. That's only a six. Wait, what? No, sorry. Plus five, 11. That misses.
Starting point is 00:45:00 Let's do another one. Shockingly. It's 21. Bad hits. Okay. Can I just roll the other one since I'm on D20s? Why not? Okay. That one's only of eight. Shockingly. It's 21. Bad hits. Okay. Can I just roll the other one since I'm on d20s? Why not? Okay.
Starting point is 00:45:07 That one's only of eight. That misses. Okay, cool. And then, sorry, I got to go back to my elemental to find out. It is 1d10 plus four plus the spells level bludgeoning damage. So 1d10 plus 10. So it's not going to be a ton. It might be.
Starting point is 00:45:24 1d10 plus 10. You get up to 20. 14 total. Pretty good. Bludgeoning damage, so 1d10 plus 10. So it's not going to be a ton. It might be. 1d10 plus 10. You get up to 20. 14 total. Pretty good. Bludgeoning damage. On Bolink. And then I would like it to move into Bolink's space and whelm Bolink.
Starting point is 00:45:39 Whelm? Like he's not overwhelmed. He's just whelmed. Yeah. Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:52 Each creature in the elemental space must make a DC 15 strength saving throw on a failure. One target takes 2d8 plus 4 bludgeoning damage. Okay. So you said strength saving throw. Yes. Okay. Rolling that. This is a plus 5. 17.
Starting point is 00:46:04 Okay. Don't worry about that. All right. And I'm a bear. And a roar at. 17. Okay, don't worry about that. All right. And I'm a bear and a roar at Bow Link. Ooh, make an intimidation check. Yeah. They can pee his pants. Give me urine.
Starting point is 00:46:14 Show me urine. I mean, that's an 18. Oh, yeah. You see the confidence disappear from his eyes for a brief second. It's half ounce of urine. Say you're in trouble. You're in trouble. You're in trouble. You're in trouble.
Starting point is 00:46:28 And it just sounds like. I speak to your conic. Maybe I do too. Anything else, Mud? No. And that will already include your water elemental as well, right? Yeah. What's its name?
Starting point is 00:46:41 What's the name? Glubby. Glubby. Glubby. Big fan. Glubby, Glubby. Big fan. Glubby. Related to Glubber. The water elemental.
Starting point is 00:46:48 All right. Finally, it's Inku's turn. Take that damage. Oh, right. I've written down right here. Oh, dang. 20 damage from Cloud of Daggers. Okay.
Starting point is 00:46:56 Don't think I forgot. It was like an hour ago. I have it written here. I would have seen it during this turn, but I did not see it at that moment. Okay, boom. Note gone. And she disappears into the shadows. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:47:14 And then reappears behind Bart. That cloud of daggers could have come from anyone. She leans in and whispers into your ear. That was very naughty, Bart. Kind of hot. Bart goes, I like ASMR. From under her cloak, it doesn't make any sense, but she pulls out this giant scythe
Starting point is 00:47:35 and she takes a swing at you, Bart. This will be the day I've waited for. That was not a Blink-182 reference. But that was good. Ruby. That hits AC 17. Should I use the shield? I feel like you're going to have multiple attacks.
Starting point is 00:47:50 Yeah, I just don't know what she's going to do. Okay, I'm going to use that shield to increase my AC by five. So that would not hit. So what is your AC with that five? 20. Okay. Inku looks upset with you. She wasn't before.
Starting point is 00:48:04 More so. She was annoyed before. Now she's angry. That was really nuts. I still like you when you're angry. Well, let's see if she likes you. She takes another swing hitting AC 29. Well, yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:15 I don't know about shields are going to help you on that one, Bart. Sorry. That does. Bart closes his eyes, so it feels like it hurts less. It doesn't work. 39 points of slashing damage. All right. Plus.
Starting point is 00:48:29 Necrotic. And 60 points of necrotic damage. Well, I'm dead. You're down. Well, I had 56. There's a difference of terminology. You are down. You are not dead.
Starting point is 00:48:39 I am down. So I'm at zero HP? Correct. Jeez. Inku smiles. And that's all she'll do for now. Okay, team. They got that bones thing over there that we still need to figure out.
Starting point is 00:48:50 And that was Bart's mission, but Bart is down. The Shadrow to the south. It's turn. Everyone's far from it. Everyone moved away in the other direction. Man, this one's kind of- Is it purring? Get it, mud. This one's not of... Is it purring? Dead at mud.
Starting point is 00:49:06 This one's not in the greatest of locations. It's going to close the distance to try to get closer to Inku. And, oh yeah, it'll take a shot at Gum Gum. Hitting AC, 28. That hits. You sounded really excited about that, Gum Gum. Doing 18 points of piercing damage. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:28 So, 9. 9. And make a wisdom saving throw. 2. Wait, you're blind still, right? Yeah. Make a wisdom saving throw to see if you knock prone. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:37 I guess I'll do that. That's 12. 12. You're knocked prone. Okay. The Shadrow fires another shard at you. Okay. These are tough. Hitting AC 24. That hits. Shadrow fires another shard at you. Okay. These are tough.
Starting point is 00:49:45 Hitting AC 24. Remember, Jon said he felt bad for me. The things had not been going my way in combat lately. We invite that into our lives. Thanks for manifesting that into reality. I'm proud of my choices. I'm fine. What are you guys doing?
Starting point is 00:49:59 Hits. Dying. 16 points of damage. Piercing damage. Eight. Yes. And you're already prone and blind so i mean on the bright side you don't have to make a save you throw again i can't see it dark to me the dark side which is also a blink-182 song i hate this i hate it i won't be home for christmas
Starting point is 00:50:21 so it's Bart's turn. I'm down. Right. But you have to make a roll to see if you stabilize. I don't see where that is. It's another blink when I do two seconds. Oh. So go ahead and roll a d20.
Starting point is 00:50:36 One to ten is bad. Eleven to twenty is good. Nine. Nine. No! So check failure. That's the faintest. Cool.
Starting point is 00:50:43 It's okay. It's okay. We got you. Don't you worry It's okay. We got you. Don't you worry, Bart. I've got you. Say that beautiful singing voice. I've got the plan. Getting cold.
Starting point is 00:50:52 No. I shoot a flaming arrow at you. I use my mage hand to give myself CPR. I can slap you a couple times. One last hurrah. Hold my hand, mage hand. I just found out I was a quarterling. I'm going to die.
Starting point is 00:51:10 You're going to be a nunling. Oh, zeroling. A zeroling. The Shadrow to the north. Wait, why was I able to do that just now? Is it after everyone's turn? It was your turn. So we've got a full circle.
Starting point is 00:51:20 That's your turn. I thought I'm before Gum-Gum. You are. You're first in the initiative. So after that last Shadrow, it came back up to the top of the initiative, which was your turn. Gum-Gum hasn't gone again. Oh, okay. I thought he was doing his turn.
Starting point is 00:51:31 Gum-Gum took a damage. Never mind. Yeah. And the Shadrow to the north. Gum-Gum is close to them. Oh, I know. Come on. Bring it.
Starting point is 00:51:39 Don't invite that. I say from the ground blind. That Shadrow unsheathes a blade that is pitch black and reflects no light. Darksaber. I couldn't see it anyway. And it takes a swing at Gum Gum. Chris's defiant face. I wish everyone could see it.
Starting point is 00:51:57 Hitting. Oh, AC 13? That misses. Yeah. Wow. I just have to check, though. I'm blinded and prone. prone yes i don't think it affects your ac i think when you're prone you do not get your dexterity modifier added to your ac
Starting point is 00:52:11 an attack roll against creature has advantage if they're within five feet oh because you're prone so i get to roll again yeah oh thank you that was not very good for you but no it's not very good for him to do that 15 uh misses Oh, well look see it worked out for you Yeah, the shadow is not happy about it. I like to think it's like just striking down with a sword and you're just rolling around You roll to the left and it swings down again you roll to the right we Gum-gum has good hearing so His other senses are heightened if he's blind right? Yeah. You can hear the air rushing aside as the sword comes down. What's that character again?
Starting point is 00:52:47 That's like the Marvel hero that's blind. Daredevil. You become Daredevil. Well, let's see if it happens again because it gets to make a second attack with that blade. I rolled both times. So the bear won 21. That, I assume, is a hit. 21?
Starting point is 00:52:59 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that is it. This time, the Shadowhound has learned from its mistake, figures out which direction you're rolling in, and connects for 23 points of slashing damage. Okay. So half of that.
Starting point is 00:53:12 Plus necrotic. Necrotic damage. Okay. Well, what's that? 30 points of necrotic damage. So 30 plus what was 23? Half of 23. Did I do 11?
Starting point is 00:53:23 We'll run it down. That would be 11. Okay. So. 41. How you doing? All We'll run it down. That'll be 11. Okay. So. A 41. How you doing? All right. I really am.
Starting point is 00:53:29 All right. That's its turn. Kyborg. Okay. I'm going to try to run through this very quickly, but can you quickly give me a run through of how I get up from prone and what's up with those bones? Half your movement to be standing again. Okay.
Starting point is 00:53:42 I do that. So then you have half less movement. And then the bones are, you'd have to wade through some of the purple liquid. Because like I said, it's like resting on the precipice of a waterfall of this purpley liquid. And it's further beyond this shadrow to the north. What do I see with my beautiful green elven eyes? Can I perceive anything about it? Make a perception check then.
Starting point is 00:54:01 You got it. It's a one. It's a one. We got a one, folks. Well got it. It's a one. It's a one. We got a one, folks. Well, it's six, but... It's kind of hard to find the box. It's like blended in with the rocks that it's resting on. It's really hard to make a distinction as to what it is.
Starting point is 00:54:16 I'm going to shoot those bones. I have no other choice. Yeah. All right. First of all, gift of the chromatic dragon. Chromatic infusion. I'm going to make my arrows opposite of necrotic. What should I do?
Starting point is 00:54:29 Cold, sharing fire. Lightning or fire? Yeah, lightning. I do lightning. So you fire an arrow with gift of the chromatic dragon using lightning at the bone chest. I keep wanting to say box. At the bone chest. We know what you mean. You know it. Okay. Enter the bone chest. I keep wanting to say box. At the bone chest. We know what you mean.
Starting point is 00:54:46 You know it. Okay. Enter the bone zone. Make a bone saws ready. There you go. You made an attack roll. 20. Okay, it hits.
Starting point is 00:54:56 I guess roll damage. Okay. What's the bone box's AC? I feel like destroying the bone box wasn't the solution for the puzzle. All right, well, you know know I'm just trying to do something We got it. We got a knockout options. Well, I've done what that's 1d for damage from the lightning Oh, you got it. I have no idea what the boxes they see is Barbara to answer your question
Starting point is 00:55:14 I was like just roll if it's high we'll say it is if it's low we'll say no I am like passed out right now, so this all sounds like Charlie Brown's teacher The D force like a pyramid got it like Charlie Brown's teacher. In the background. Is it D8? What is this? The D4 is like a pyramid. Got it. Two! So 10 points of damage?
Starting point is 00:55:31 Yeah. What happens? What happens, Gus? What happens? Paint us a vivid picture of what happens when our good friend Kyborg shoots a lightning arrow at a box.
Starting point is 00:55:38 It seems like time slows down as the arrow impacts the box and the bones shatter flying in every direction. Out from inside the box, you see a key start spinning in the air. It falls precariously on the edge of the waterfall. It seems like it could go at any second.
Starting point is 00:55:55 I didn't see that. I don't have a lot of movement. I don't have a lot of movement here. How far away is it? Cause I got half of 35, which is 17, 18. Yeah. Use the arrow you have that lets you shoot at things and bring them back to you. You don't have like a mage hand type situation, huh?
Starting point is 00:56:10 It's a little further than that. I'd say it's probably like 35, 40 away or so. And what's the, am I going to be opening myself up to attacks of opportunity? If I like run beeline it straight towards it or, because I can, I can use an attack to further my movement. Is that correct? It's movement. It's movement. What do I can use an attack to further my movement. Is that correct? Movement. Movement. What do you mean use an attack to further your movement? No, you can...
Starting point is 00:56:30 If you don't attack... You can double dash. Then you can double dash, but you can't... Right. That's your action. You can't use a second attack. Right. You could try to wade through the water
Starting point is 00:56:39 or you could try to jump up onto some of the rocks where that Shadrow and Gum-Gum are currently at. You probably have enough movement for either of those, but that would only take you about halfway to the key. Okay. Well, I've already made an attack, so I can't do movement. Correct. Okay, so I will do that. I'll make that movement.
Starting point is 00:56:58 Okay, so you're up on that little, which is a jump, I assume, or do you want to wade through and climb up there? No, I want to jump. Okay. So athletics or? Yeah, just make an athletics check. Or acrobatics, perhaps? No, you didn't say a fancy jump.
Starting point is 00:57:13 If you were doing some kind of flip, I would say. There's a cool flourish of the hands and the feet when I do it. Jazz hands? Yeah. Okay. Acrobatics then? Okay. Is your acrobatics roll better than your athletics roll? No.
Starting point is 00:57:24 Yes? Yeah, sure. Yes. Just by one. Still, that one counts. 23. Oh, yeah, easily. Touchdown!
Starting point is 00:57:30 Is this easy mode? No. No. Bart's dying. Okay. I know Bart. I know Bart. Okay, so then, um, then, uh, who was the guy that inflicted a lot of damage, uh, that
Starting point is 00:57:42 wasn't- All of them. Bo-Link? Bo-Link. Bo-Bo. Bo-Link attacked Mud. Okay.. Bow Link. Bow. Bow. Bow Link attacked mud. Okay. Bow, this is forever winter.
Starting point is 00:57:49 You are my sworn enemy. And then I use the longer bow of crystallina on bow. Okay. Bow. Bow. Bow. 31. That hits.
Starting point is 00:58:00 Okay. And I do 10 points of damage. Plus lightning. Plus I have 4d6 on sworn enemies of cold damage. But what about your lightning? Is it still there? Don't get into it. Ice lightning.
Starting point is 00:58:13 What reckless abandon. So that's 12. Cold damage. Okay. Cold damage plus a d4 lightning damage. That's four. So that's 26. Well, total.
Starting point is 00:58:22 Total. Okay. How's that? How do you like that? Yeah, he looks cold and electrified at the same time. He does total. Okay. How's that? How do you like that? Yeah, he looks cold and electrified at the same time. He does not look happy. Neat. All right, I'm going to do it again.
Starting point is 00:58:31 I have three actions, or three attacks. So I hit another arrow. Ooh, baby. That's a 32. Ooh, baby. All right. And then I do one hit. Seven piercing.
Starting point is 00:58:41 17 cold damage. Nine plus 17. 26. Plus a little bit of lightning plus a little bit of lightning. A little bit of lightning. So 27? Yes. A little bit of kyborg in my life. Okay, yeah, Bolink is not
Starting point is 00:58:53 happy about any of that. How are they like looking looking though? Not great. Okay. Action surge! Yeah, I just want to get this guy out of here. For the odd listener at home, Gus just rolled his eyes. I'm not happy. I forgot about action surge this guy out of here. For the odd listener at home, Gus just rolled his eyes. I'm not happy. I forgot about action surge. You're killing my dudes.
Starting point is 00:59:08 All right. Action surge. Going to continue on with the longer bow of crystallina. Boom. Unbow Link again, I assume? Yes. 30. Yeah, that hits.
Starting point is 00:59:14 He's my mortal enemy. 46 ice damage. Is that a crit? No. 17 plus 13. First, I'll do the piercing, which is 10. And then the ice damage, which is 23, plus the lightning damage, which is... 46, and you got a 23?
Starting point is 00:59:31 Yeah. 6, 5, 6, 6. Wow. Damn. Plus the lightning damage is one point, so that's a 34 total. The power of Satan. Kill Bolink. Yeah, Bolink falls to the ground.
Starting point is 00:59:46 Unmoving. I don't have an enemy next to me anymore. Are they dead? He's unmoving. I'll make sure. Down and unmoving. I'm technically down and unmoving. He's dead. And then I already used Gift of the Chromatic Dragon, but with Action Surge, that doesn't reset my bonus action,
Starting point is 01:00:01 does it not? No, I do not believe so. Okay, well, you know, I I'm just gonna take another shot at bowling just to make sure I think do it just to be to be clear I'll try to be cagey about it yet don't waste it okay and then uh even though it's a disadvantage I have two more attacks I want to use them against inku are you at disadvantage because bowling wait your sworn enemy is down oh Oh, yeah. My sworn enemy is dead, so then I get to switch it. Forever, Winter! Can you switch it? Yes.
Starting point is 01:00:30 If they fall, the mechanic is supposed to not punish you if you actually succeed in killing your enemy. Oh, God. But then they'll have advantage against me. That's fine. That's fine. Kill one of the little Shadrach. No, I'm going to go against Inku. Inku, my sworn enemy! I use my Longerbow Triumph against them. It's okay. It's not'm going to go against Inku. Inku, my enemy! I use my longer bow
Starting point is 01:00:45 triumph against them. It's okay. It's not like these adds are totally killing us. 22. Yeah, that hits her. Alright. I do 13 points piercing. 18 ice and 3 lightning. Marky's cast plot of daggers
Starting point is 01:01:01 ran to the chest, died. He's going to wake up and everyone's going to be dead. At this point, you're hearing Kyber yell a lot. It's all just like hazy explosions and stuff like that. So that is 34 total? Yes. And what was it again? 13, 18, 3.
Starting point is 01:01:25 Okay. 31, 34. Got it. Okay. And what was it again? 13, 18, 3, okay, 31, 34, got it. Okay, and then I'm gonna, oh god, I should have been rolling twice this entire time, because I have advantage. Well, you haven't missed, so. Okay, well then. It's been fine. But you could have gotten a crit. Could have been critted. Yeah. So this is 16, and then I'm gonna roll that again. 17. Alright, so no crits. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:41 17, though? Oh, I thought you were doing your re-rolls. Uh, 16, 17, no, those do not hit. I'm lucky so no crits. Yeah. 17, though? Oh, I thought you were doing your rerolls. 16, 17. No, those do not hit. I'm lucky. Curses. Curses. For sure, the way that Tolkien wrote the end of The Hobbit, Bilbo goes the same thing. I think he gets knocked out and then gets told the final fight by the dwarves.
Starting point is 01:01:57 So I'll just be like him. Yeah. And you're also a half-blood. Quarterly. A 19 hit. Okay. Doing piercing. 14. Plus ice. Oh, wait, no. I'm going to roll lightning just to mix it up. Haly. 19 hits. Okay. Doing piercing. 14.
Starting point is 01:02:07 Plus ice. Oh wait, no. I'm gonna roll lightning just to mix it up. Ha ha. 4. Plus ice. 11. So that's 29. 29. Okay. You have Inku's attention. That's the end of my turn so then I just wave. Okay. Gum gum.
Starting point is 01:02:22 Yeah. You're rolling around. What are you gonna do? You think Kyborg is What are you going to do? You think Kyborg is close to you? I do. You smell him. It smells like Axe body spray. Is that the elf still near me that attacked me? Yes.
Starting point is 01:02:37 How far away was Bart? Bart was back across like some of that liquid back on the shore. Let's say from where you are 15, 20 feet or so. If I use my immovable rod to teleport to Bart. Okay. I don't know, is there anything he could even do for me if I'm... He could give you a potion to try to stabilize you, and then that would like bring you back up and you would no longer need to make the saving throws.
Starting point is 01:03:00 So we discussed changing the way we do potions so that I can use it not as a main action or like, how does it work? If I wanted to try and heal Bart. We've gone a few different ways. And normally when we encounter the situation, the party who you're giving it to is awake and able to assist you. In this case, Bart is down and incapacitated. So I would say it would take an action for you to pull it out and then to give it to Bart. Okay.
Starting point is 01:03:22 And then using my immovable rod, that would take out my action. Oh, I see what you're saying. If you, I mean, I still have two more attempts to save myself too. This is also, I think Gum Gum would do this. Oh yeah, okay, sure. I'm going to say yes, that would be an action to pull out
Starting point is 01:03:38 and use your immovable rod. So that would use your action. So you could get to Bart, but you couldn't also give the potion as well this turn. Okay. Quick question. How far is Bart from mud? Not too far.
Starting point is 01:03:48 Bart just ran up a little ways from mud. I'd say 20 feet or so. 20 feet to the east. I've got Bart. Don't worry about him. I can't help but worry about him, but okay. Then I guess I will stand up. Okay.
Starting point is 01:04:01 Let's have my movement. Yes. And I will recklessly attack that elf that's in front of me. Shadrow. So that cancels out and you end up even. Yeah. Okay. That's 26. That hits. Doing
Starting point is 01:04:16 17 points of damage. Ooh. You hear the Shadrow grunt in pain. And it's You can smell it still standing in front of you. What's this smell like? I like the sound of you smelling it too. I feel like the Shadrow would have like Axe Body Spray.
Starting point is 01:04:33 I just made that joke while you were gone. I said you smell Kyborg close to you. It smells like Axe Body Spray. It's just a yeah, it gets its dark else. Then I'm going to make ac 15 to make a saving throw or be knocked prone what you're gonna make a read my balancing x on a hit the wielder can choose one
Starting point is 01:04:54 of the following oh i see what you said so you force the target to make a dexterity saving throw or be knocked prone okay so that is a dc 15 dexterity saving throw. A Shadrow has a plus eight. That is a 10. Failure. Yes. So the hit from your balancing axe knocks the Shadrow down. Okay. And now I'm going to use my second attack to hit it again.
Starting point is 01:05:18 This time, also not at disadvantage because now it's prone. Yes, correct. So normally you would be at advantage, but because you're blind, you're disadvantaged, so it cancels out. It's just normal attack. 19. That hits. That's 17 plus 3, so 20. Nice. The Shadrow is prone, not
Starting point is 01:05:35 because of your attack, but because it is dead. Yay! It sounds dead and smells it. I don't say yay because I'm dead. Bye, GumGum. I have to move back. A reference that so many people are not going to get. Aw, GumGum. dead and smells it i don't say yay because i'm dead i come go out i have a new episode reference that so many people are not gonna get it nope not even that see i don't think barbara knows what it's from i'm manning okay no i'm making a joke that same people who did the hot pocket oh yeah so you've one-upped his
Starting point is 01:06:00 joke with your own hey i see your joke oh wait i. Oh, wait. I'm dead. Yes. Yes, and. Yes, plus. I want to use my remaining 20 feet of movement to run towards Bart. Run or jump. Remember, there's kind of like that purplish liquid between you. Well, I guess, is there any other guys around me? I don't think so.
Starting point is 01:06:21 The closest one is going to be Inku, who is by Bart. Okay, and then that key, I don't even see it, so I couldn't go so. The closest one is going to be Inku, who is by Bart. Okay. And then that key, I don't even see it, so I couldn't go for it. Correct. You knew where the box was there, but you would have no idea what happened to it. I'm going to go to Bart.
Starting point is 01:06:34 Okay. Whatever. If I can jump there. You tell me. Yeah, I'll jump there. Jump onto Inku. Nope. Wait, nope.
Starting point is 01:06:40 Really quick, though. If this key, is it for unlocking his box? Don't worry about the key. Don't worry about Bart. I'm saying, like, if you ran to the parents, I could throw you Hail Mary, the key, to you, and you can unlock the parents if that's what it's supposed to be for. I've got it.
Starting point is 01:06:53 Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. You just got it. Mud's got it. Let the druid go. What are you doing, Gum-Gum? I'm going to jump to wherever Bart is. Okay. You jump over to Bart and Inku.
Starting point is 01:07:02 I don't know what else to do. Yeah. Because I don't know the key. That's fine. Anything else you want to do or are you just closing that distance? I'll close the distance. I don't suppose. I love when a sentence starts with that. I could put my friendship bracelet on Bart. That's got to be an action, right? Or is it
Starting point is 01:07:17 a bonus action on the description? I already used my bonus action. Yeah, he already used it. I was trying to think like I might let it slide as a bonus action but you already used a bonus action so i'm gonna say no uh then yeah that's that's i'm out okay that's it for gum gum it is the shadrow in the center's turn has that one been attacked at all yes that one has been attacked it looks like a couple of times it's going to okay so gum gum just came back bard is down ink is there. Inku's there.
Starting point is 01:07:45 Kyborg's over there. Mud's over there. Bolink's down. It could go a couple of different ways. I think it's going to attack Mud because Bolink is down and Inku can take care of herself. Do it. Do it. Yeah. We're going to Bolink.
Starting point is 01:08:03 Or Jo. Jo, thanks for voicing. Thanks for it. Thanks for it. It fires a shard at mud or I guess the polar bear. Oh man. There's also a water elemental. Oh my God. Oh wow.
Starting point is 01:08:15 Which one would it attack? You can do whatever you want. I can do either. Even is polar bear oddest water elemental. Polar bear. All right. So it fires a shard at the Polar Bear, hitting AC 27. That physically harmed John's stomach.
Starting point is 01:08:30 I just, the loudest stomach growl just came out of me because I am ready for food. Lunchtime soon. 24 points of piercing damage, and you must make a wisdom saving throw. You're making me get into too many screens. You got this. You got that. That's easy. What was it? A wisdom saving throw?
Starting point is 01:08:45 Yes. Okay, I get advantage. I don't think I'll need it. 27. That's beautiful. Yeah, that makes it. Curses. How much damage did you do?
Starting point is 01:08:52 24. Okay. I wish when it said custom roll, it had a small indication telling you which dice were rolled to get that roll because then I have to go back and click at them. Anyway. All right.
Starting point is 01:09:00 So then is summon elemental a concentration spell? Like, do you need to roll concentration since you took damage there? Pretty sure it's not. I believe he just is. Yeah. I don't think it is a concentration either. I just want to verify that. Summon elemental.
Starting point is 01:09:13 Uh, nope. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Cause it's just there. It's like it has autonomy. Oh, it is. Concentration up to one hour.
Starting point is 01:09:17 Oh, it is. Dang. Oh, wow. I didn't realize that. That didn't make any sense. I'll agree with you, but rules are rules. He actually pushed up your glasses on that one. Rules are rules.
Starting point is 01:09:27 Okay, what do you want to do? Make a concentration check. Concentration check. You can do this. You can do this. Come on, man. Wait, concentration? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:35 Roll for concentration? Is that in... It should be a d20 plus the spell level plus... Well, just roll a d20 and then I'll work on it. I think it's also plus the damage level plus... Well, just roll a d20 and then I'll work on it. I think it's also plus the damage you took. I am going to use my inspiration die on that. That was a one. That was a one. That's not good.
Starting point is 01:09:54 That's a 12. Spell was at six, so 18 plus... The dc equals 10 or half the damage taken, whichever number is higher. You took 12. All right, so then... So I beat it.
Starting point is 01:10:07 Yeah, and it would be a constitution saving throw, so then you add whatever your constitution saving throw bonus is to it. I'm already there. Okay. What was Water Elemental's name again? Glubby. Glubby!
Starting point is 01:10:17 Stay, Glubby. So it's a successful check. You feel that sense of dread come over you again. It tries to cast fear fear on you make a wisdom saving throw okay uh 27 or 19 so 27 yeah it does not take root you're too brave yeah i am thank you okay what was that do i get to go yeah it's your turn Oh man two turns in one episode That's what I've assumed you kill one of the players or you down one of the players only reason
Starting point is 01:10:54 Farts down I take the shortest Speaking of that Okay, Bart is ahead of me How far? You know the other part first How far, uh, you know, I'll deal with Bart first. Bart's breath is terrible. I go up to Bart. I would assume that using an item is an action, correct? Usually. We may have some leeway depending on what specifically you want to do.
Starting point is 01:11:19 Well, okay. I'm going to use my eggless of equipping so that I can pull an item from me. I'm a bear still. Okay. And so I'm going to pull an item, and I want to pull the Mud's Totem of Restoration, which allows me to... I can expend a charge and use a bonus action
Starting point is 01:11:37 to cast Healing Spirit, which will sit next to Bart. Healing Spirit then allows Bart to roll for some health, which is 1d6 plus whatever spell level you cast it at above second level. I'm going to cast it at fifth level, so 4d6. Okay. Good, good. I mean, right now?
Starting point is 01:12:01 Yeah. Because that would bring him out of death roll, right? Correct. So it's 46. Oh, six. 21. Nice. So if you do that, just for clarification, the elemental goes away.
Starting point is 01:12:15 But the item is the one that's casting it, isn't it? It's a totem. It can heal a number of times equal to one plus your spellcasting ability modifier. So you pull out, you use the totem. Because it keeps doing, is that not how that works? i'm trying to re is this our first time using it so i don't think i've spent enough time acknowledging that i rolled a 21. on a 46. that's 24 that's great that's like your role from before blaine yeah dude you killed it and if i may i'm pretty sure that the elemental stays yeah yeah yeah well yeah yes, yeah, yes, we'll allow it. Yes. We'll allow it. Okay, we're pulling out
Starting point is 01:12:45 We'll allow it. I said Bart Wow a 21 Or just a thing where it goes Think who says welcome back God it's a shame that this is audio only. The facial reactions from you guys. Okay, I want to make it very clear. Bart will roll that on Bart's next action. It starts on your first place
Starting point is 01:13:14 when you are in the vicinity of the healing spirit, which also means, Gum-Gum, your next action, you need to roll as well for health. Okay, so Bart is still down, but will receive that healing that was already rolled. I could that yeah yeah it's a five foot cube so and it stays there for okay i'll pretend i'm still seeing the skull on my yeah on my thing instead of my hp okay and then now the water elemental to the key how much is ground how much is water so it's not just to clarify it's not water it's like a purple liquid water. It's like a purple liquid. Okay, liquid. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:46 Just the first 25 feet or so are solid. Then after that it becomes that liquid and then there's a rocky crag where the key is at the very end. Okay, then I have to give you a little math problem and I'm going to let you figure it out. Excellent. Yes, I knew you'd like that.
Starting point is 01:14:02 He minored in math. The water elemental has a 30 foot land speed, 90 foot swim speed. Oh, okay. He minored in math. The water elemental has a 30-foot land speed, 90-foot swim speed. Oh, okay. Yeah, easily makes it. Okay. He's just not going to try that. No, no, no, because it's just 20, and then that's like two-thirds, so then you're left with a third.
Starting point is 01:14:15 That's another 30. I think it has either a third. I'm going to be good here and say I think it has either 30 or either 90. It doesn't go 30 and 90. Well, no, yeah. So it uses 20, which is two thirds of 90, which leaves a 30 of liquid. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 01:14:29 So you're on the line. Okay. So it's at the key. Yes. It would be able to reach the key. Yeah, it does. It makes it easily and it reaches the key.
Starting point is 01:14:39 Okay. Does grabbing the key count as an action? No, I'll say no. Okay. Then he comes back to me and gives me the key. I don't know if it has enough movement for that. Well, you said...
Starting point is 01:14:50 It's 30 and 90. Oh, so it's like it only double moves. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If it does... Yeah, yeah. Correct, correct. Okay. Yeah. Here, Clubby. Yeah, so the water elemental comes back and then the last few feet as it reaches you, it's like it almost
Starting point is 01:15:06 dissipates and it just becomes like a wave of water that pushes uh the key towards you my glove he's gone gone what dropping the key at your feet but the key looked like he was surfing it's real tabular why why did it disappear i don't know do know? Can you communicate with it? Yeah. It felt pain when it was in the fluid. Oh. Oh. I don't feel so good. Interesting. Okay, don't touch the fluid.
Starting point is 01:15:30 And so the key... Catwalk's drinking out of it. The key laps up at your feet. It's a really weird material. It's almost like it's shifting. It's kind of like inky black key. You would swear it's a fluid, but it's really not. It's solid.
Starting point is 01:15:46 Can I pick it up? Yeah. I pick it up. Make a wisdom saving throw. Okay. I'm glad this is you, not me. The wisdom saving throws? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:54 That is either 21 or... 21. Yeah, 21. Again, you feel that fear try to take root inside of you just from holding this key in your hand. It conjures up awful images in your mind's eye, which you're able to push it away. M is for mud.
Starting point is 01:16:10 M is for might not get afraid. M is for mind's eye. It's for mighty. All right. Mud yells out, I've got the key! My key! Thank you and all the others. Anything else, Mud?
Starting point is 01:16:24 No, I'm next to Bart and that's it so you're next to bart and gum gum who came over and inkoo yeah god i hope you don't have aoe okay oh it's inkoo's turn yay i'm still down yes you are still down why did you give him that idea blade okay so would you heal from the thing not until their turn i gotta yeah top top of your turn inkoo does not like that you have the key mud so she fixes her attention on you and she's gonna attack you with her sight okay hitting ac 21 yes Doing 37 points of slashing damage. Okay. And, yes, and 48 points of necrotic.
Starting point is 01:17:11 Oh, 85? Yeah, 85. I believe I'm still standing. And knock the polar bear out. Oh, I am no longer the bear of the polars. I'm a very, very hurt druid. Well, let's see if we can make you a very, very dead druid. Okay.
Starting point is 01:17:27 How dare you? She attacks again, hitting AC 16. Just barely. Barely? No, we're not bears anymore. No bear puns. Yeah, barely. Doing 39 points of slashing.
Starting point is 01:17:40 I'm down. Okay, no point in continuing. Inku smiles. No one's there to see it. I'm there. I just can't see it. No one can see. Wait, Kyborg can. He's not there. He's not close enough.
Starting point is 01:17:50 I'm staring out from the distance because Inku was like, I see you. And then I'm like, oh, uh, it's not. So now what's he gonna do? So Inku's in our space. Correct. So Inku makes the attack. Mud goes down. In an annoyed voice, Inku shouts,
Starting point is 01:18:06 Enough of these games! He waves her bony fingers and everything suddenly goes black. Kaibor, you feel the power drain from your body and you feel like something's wrong. You know your diadem is gone. Amidst the darkness, you hear Inku call out, You were never truly going to win the day, Bartholomew. But don't worry, you'll get what's coming to you. Hugh Manor, who did nothing the entire fight, Hugh Manor chuckles. Indeed, the end is coming. I've seen it, and I promise none of you are ready for it. Shall we, my love?
Starting point is 01:18:44 Inku snaps her fingers and you hear a crack of thunder. None of you are ready for it. Shall we, my love? Inku snaps her fingers and you hear a crack of thunder. Gum-Gum, you can see again. I guess, Kyborg, you can see as well. But Inku, Hugh, and the Shadrow are gone. The swirling portal you entered earlier is beginning to fade. Are we in combat? No.
Starting point is 01:19:04 Okay, then can the healing spirit do some stuff? The healing spirit, I guess, would proc and everyone would, who was around it, would heal. Healing spirit lasts for a minute and you can cast a spell that takes 10 seconds, right? Around to six seconds. Around to six seconds. Yeah. So the healing spirit could technically cast the heal thing, what, 10 times? 10 times. Okay.
Starting point is 01:19:23 So we're at full health. That being said, the portal you entered is beginning to fade, and it seems like it's not going to stick around very long. Then it goes off at least once. Okay. And you get 21, you need to roll for 4d6, and I will roll for 4d6. So, should I run? We should probably all run for the portal.
Starting point is 01:19:41 Yeah, they need heals to get them back up and out. No, I think I'm good now. Yeah, and then we just need to all sprint. I have 19 health. And I got 21 from that roll. As you all are healing, you hear shouts from the southeast corner of the cavern. You're perfect. It's your parents.
Starting point is 01:19:59 Oh, gosh. They're here. You need to go get them. I'm going with you, right? Let's go. Yeah, Bart runs up to his parents. I run to assist. Like I said earlier, they're bound and held in place there,
Starting point is 01:20:09 but when you touch the key to their bindings, the bindings slip away. And does the key disappear too? Yes. I assume you take them and escape. So you all pass through the portal and arrive back in the heart of Mount Sayamoto. Chromatic fluids swirling with color all around you.
Starting point is 01:20:24 Duncan is pacing at the entrance of the cavern while morning light peeks through the mouth of the cave. He perks up at the sight of you. Oh, thank die. You made it back, my friends. It's so good to see your faces again. Hurry, come and see, come and see. Duncan waves you all over to the entrance. We go and see. Yeah, yeah. You exit the cave and the radiant rays of the sun never felt warmer on your weary skin. You look out all across the provinces of totora and you see countless dragonborn defeating what's left of the shadra
Starting point is 01:20:49 as they recoil in the sunlight at the base of the mountain you see all four ancient dragons surrounding lodoria each exhaling their elemental breath in a cone around her her scaly body is consumed and dissolves in a mist of shadow that That was the other dragon. That was the one that was chasing us. Yeah, it was the one that had been chasing you before. Yeah, remember that quick death event? A wrinkled halfling clears his throat. Bart? It really is you, isn't it?
Starting point is 01:21:18 But you're so grown up. Am I not dreaming? The dragonborn that's with him says, I'm afraid we've been tortured with the worst fears and nightmares imaginable for what can only be described as an eternity. It is
Starting point is 01:21:34 difficult to believe that this is all truly happening. Dad? Forgive us, Bart. We weren't there for you. For years, it seems. And, well, we never stopped loving you, son. It seems Daya has given her family a second chance.
Starting point is 01:21:57 A new day to finally make things. Omar stops and stares at Gum-Gum. I feel as if I know you. Hi, I at Gum-Gum. I feel as if I know you. Hi, I'm Gum-Gum. Jim Sutton, look. Surely it couldn't be him, right, Omar? After all these years. I'm a flower wizard.
Starting point is 01:22:18 But his eyes does have the same eyes. I have eyes? They're crossed. Dear boy, I believe we're your godparents. Dads? Find out in the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. I want to congratulate Kyborg. Because out of the four of us,
Starting point is 01:22:46 he's the only one who doesn't have daddy issues. He's got mommy issues. Oh. Yeah. I miss Grisdalina. I hug my bow. I can't even process what all just happened. I cast a cloud of daggers and then it popped out of existence
Starting point is 01:22:59 until it was all done. Well, let's explore more about what's going on with Bart's family next time. Here's a quick shout out to folks interacting with us on social media recently. Here's some of the NPCs named after them in this episode. Ladoria the Shadow Dragon was named after Atla Ladoria. And Bolink the Shadrow was named after AtlinkIB. We also want to give a special thanks to some friends who provided voiceover for characters in this episode.
Starting point is 01:23:19 Like Inku, who's voiced by Raquel Lily. Hugh Manor, voiced by Achievement Hunter's Trevor Collins. Bolink, voiced by Achievement Hunters Trevor Collins, Bo Link voiced by Achievement Hunters Joe Lee, Omar Finn voiced by Funhouse's Jacob Fullerton and SimSun Finn voiced by Squad Team Forces BlizzBear Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon Thank you.

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