Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Vengeance in Vainia - C02 - Ep 39 - Tooth and Klawstred

Episode Date: March 19, 2024

The party reaches the second floor of the Vamspyre...but which one is Ellga's home again? Join us on Discord: https://discord.gg/roosterteeth Check out our merch and follow us on Twitter, Instagram,... TikTok and more: https://linktr.ee/TalesFromTheStinkyDragon Go to http://shadyrays.com and use code DRAGON for 35% off polarized sunglasses and snow goggles. Go to http://meundies.com/dragon for 20% off, plus free shipping. Go to http://katoskoffee.com and use code Stinky10 for 10% off your order. Go to http://heroforge.com to start designing your custom miniature today and use code STINKY for 5% off orders of physical minis. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a Rooster Teeth production. Good afternoon, all you Aldani. Swim on into the stinky dragon. Throw back our latest thirst quencher. Within a pinch of life. It's a mixture of grappling garlic, a bribe of butter, churned chulten cream, and two clawfuls of sea salt. One swig of this shellfish swill will take you from prone to prawn faster than a snap of your pincher. Snap, snap. Previously, our adventurers traipsed into the Tower of Vamspire
Starting point is 00:01:07 and trekked through Tales of Dock. They brushed up with battlers, barrels, books, and more. But the cream of the crop was when they beheld Barney Farney's family. Cobble a cup of coffee. Let's continue this cocodrous chronicle.
Starting point is 00:01:34 Totally forgot that happened. I forgot that happened. Hello, everyone. I'm Gustavo Sorolla. I'm the dungeon master of our future party. I'm going to hit our four players with an arrow. Okay. I've accepted my fate. Here we go. This week's role playing warm up question is describe the last time your character had a really good laugh and why was that
Starting point is 00:01:52 funny to them? I'll go ahead first. Hey there, it's Chip Haney. It's your good friend played by Blaine Gibson. I'm a level what are we at? Level 7? 7. Tiefen Rogue. Last time I had a good ol' hooping a holler and laugh was, oh, we were at the camp. And then I watched Stinker.
Starting point is 00:02:10 And he took a doo-doo by the campfire. And then I watched as Mateet, in their corporeal form, stepped in it. Oh, that was funny. And then Elga walked over it with their little cape. And oh, that got me. And then Barney stepped in it. And he slipped in it and he fell down and he caught on fire because he's near the campfire
Starting point is 00:02:28 oh I laughed so hard that was so funny I laughed so hard get out of my booth and Barney was still cold despite being on fire he's the old man I'll go next that was a lot I like it I like it
Starting point is 00:02:43 I'm inventing a story I'm telling a tale what does was a lot. I like it. I like it. I'm inventing a story. I'm telling a tale. What does stinker poops look like? It's just a pile of bones. It's like normal poops, but ghost. From where? It just comes out of a skeleton. So what do you mean normal poops, but ghost?
Starting point is 00:02:58 Like, okay. I know. Like, is it like? Blue slugs, kind of. Blue slugs. Blue slugs. Blue slugs. It's like ooze, like Slimer. Well, I think more solid.
Starting point is 00:03:08 I mean, like normal dog poop, but blue and translucent. Yeah, like ooze, like Slimer. It doesn't have a digestive tract. Esectoplasm. It's ghost stuff. You're the ghost. I don't poop. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:03:21 Matee draws pictures of poops and flushes them down the toilet. Because they want to be included. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hello, I'm Barbara Dunkelman and I voice Elga Von Brass, the half-elf, vampire barbarian level 7. Hello, nice to be here. Thank you. Thank you so much for the subscription. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:03:41 Yep, yep, yep. I want to Twitch stream as Elga. I think that'd be so fun. Yeah, yeah. You know, Elga, she gets a good little chuckle out of a lot of things. But Elga needs to be careful with, you know, really going and, you know, doubling over laughing. Because if she goes out of control, she might accidentally rage. Oh, yeah. And then that's not going to happen.
Starting point is 00:03:57 But, you know, I think the last time Elga had the really hearty chuckle was when Matit and I were climbing the wall. And then Barney and Chip tried to climb the wall and there was some horns in someone's butt. We had a good laugh about leaving them forever. Yeah, it was very funny. That wasn't funny. I also realized like laughing and crying in a character voice are two of the toughest things as a voice actor. Yeah. And I'm like, have I ever laughed as Elga?
Starting point is 00:04:24 I'm sure you have. But I feel like I've only laughed as myself. What does an Elga laugh sound like? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. I don't know. It's like a beauty woodpecker over here. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
Starting point is 00:04:37 That's a dolphin. It's bat form. That's me calling Quiffly. Well, hi, I'm Chris Damaris. And I play Barney Forney, the human cleric. Besides when I caught on fire. That was funny. It was whenever, just about a week ago,
Starting point is 00:04:57 and I went to go take a big bite of a sandwich. And then when I pulled out from the sandwich, my teeth stayed on the sandwich. Oh, the dentures. That's disgusting. But your teeth are not real. Well they're real teeth to someone else.
Starting point is 00:05:14 Do you remember what kind of sandwich it was Barney? Well like what kind of sandwich does Barney get down with? It was roast beef. Yeah that sounds like a Barney sandwich. Roast beef with like pimento cheese. Extra mustard. No. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:28 Chris has a serious aversion to mustard. But I feel like Barney would love mustard. Nope. It's an evil liquid. He puts that on everything. How did I not know Chris doesn't like mustard? You have to have known that, Gus. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:40 I think Chris doesn't like two things, mustard and anything to do with ears. No, I don't mind ears. I just don't like. I got a video to show you. No, don't. I don't want to see your earwax video. The inside of the ear. Earwax and mustard.
Starting point is 00:05:52 He just said a second ago, ears don't bother him. Right now, he is cringing so hard. I don't mind ears themselves on the outside. No, I'm talking about like the inner ear. He loves it. I'm learning a lot. He's so uncomfortable right now Chris is making a mistake of letting everybody know
Starting point is 00:06:08 What he doesn't like What if mustard got in your ears At least I wouldn't have to taste it I hate pictures of cute animals And free cars I hate it when people just give me money It makes me scared When they pass me blank checks the worst. Free cars. I hate it when people just give me money. Yeah, just hate it. It makes me scared when they pass
Starting point is 00:06:28 me blank checks. Bonjour, my name is John Reisinger and I play Mati Confucius. He's an Eric Cochran ghost monk. And I would have to say that the last time I laughed, I try to get a good laugh every once in a while, but there was a really funny time where I was at the bank and I was making
Starting point is 00:06:43 a transaction and then I was done with the bank and I was making a transaction. And then I was done with my transaction. And then my friend Barney, he helped me make more of a transaction. And I had such a good laugh. I thought that was such a fun little joke that Barney played. He inadvertently gave you a loan. We're still low on health from that. Oh, I'm at, I got six HP. I'm at five.
Starting point is 00:07:02 Yeah. You have six hemo points. Got any of them long rests there, Gus? Magic food, perhaps? Well, you're theoretically close to your home, right, Ilga? I would think so. Theoretically. Theoretically.
Starting point is 00:07:15 You all hear a scream down the hall. Who cares? Coming from the other direction. Then voices are shouting, Tell the truth. Let go. I don't know anything. Barney, that second voice is unmistakable.
Starting point is 00:07:26 It's her. You know it. She's in trouble, though. What are you going to do? What? You know that voice! She's just down the hallway you were just in! What? I run! You see her! A Sferatu is gripping her arm and won't let go.
Starting point is 00:07:38 Who? But she's not alone. Two young boys run up and start throwing their fists against Sferatu's wings. But it easily knocks them off to the ground. It's up to you, Barney. Your family needs you. Marnie needs you. Barney runs in.
Starting point is 00:07:56 So where's the space like right now? This would have been back, because you all were in the dregs, you know, doing your transactions in the black market. This would have been back out in the actual commissary all right bernie runs in and shoots the nosferatu the silver bolt from this crossbow the sferatu oh yeah sferatu yeah make a make an attack roll i rolled an 11 no do you have lucky no well you You sound so offended at that. So what does that do, Gus? I'm just waiting.
Starting point is 00:08:29 It sounded like Chris was hemming and hawing. No, that's it. 11. He rolled an 11. What? It must be because you're running. You don't take time to set up the shot. But the bolt goes wide and clatters off the wall.
Starting point is 00:08:42 And already, you know, all the battlers in the room were kind of on edge with the scene going down. And now that you run out and fire off a crossbow bolt, you know, the battlers that are in the room begin very quickly making edge with the scene going down. And now that you run out and fire off a crossbow bolt, you know, the battlers that are in the room begin very quickly making a beeline for the exits. Then I also have a bonus action. I mean, we're not in battle. Yeah, I am. Oh yeah. I mean, initiative.
Starting point is 00:08:55 Sure, yeah. Can I take another shot? We'll say that you run up and fire the shot and that was a, we'll call it a surprise. Okay. Then I want to use my bonus action to cast Spiritual Weapon. You create a floating spectral weapon within range to last for the duration or until you cast a spell again.
Starting point is 00:09:13 When you cast a spell, you can make a melee spell attack against a creature within five feet of the weapon. On a hit, the target takes force damage equal to 1d8 plus your spellcasting modifier, and I'm going to do that at, let me see my spells. Are you going to do a silly weapon? Yeah, I can't wait to hear what it is. I'll do that at third level.
Starting point is 00:09:29 Do a chair. That'd be cool. No, I'm going to do a vampire steak. Ooh, big old steak. Yeah. What kind? Like a ribeye? I give myself an inspiration die.
Starting point is 00:09:39 As you should, guys. I take it. So I'll do that. And so now that has its own turn? You cast a spell, you can make a melee spell attack against a creature within five feet. Oh, okay. Yeah. So then can you make the attack?
Starting point is 00:09:51 I will attack with it. Okay. Yeah. It's been a while since we referenced it, but in Baldur's Gate, it would get its own initiative. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I remember it's different in 5D. I love doing those in Baldur's Gate. So convenient.
Starting point is 00:10:02 Little axe, buddy. Yeah. All right. That's a 20. 11 plus 9. Yeah. All right. That's a 20. 11 plus nine. Nice. That hits. Okay.
Starting point is 00:10:09 And then I'm rolling for damage. That's eight damage. Does it have any extra bonus stack because it's made of silver, Gus? It's not made of silver. It's not made of silver. I was testing you. You passed, Gus.
Starting point is 00:10:21 Well done. Good job. You get to keep DMing for now. I gave myself another inspiration die. We're screwed. This Feratu's got so many now. Oh, no. So what kind of damage does it do?
Starting point is 00:10:34 Let me check. Or does it do like what the weapon attack is? It does. Because it's a spiritual weapon. Yeah. Force damage. Force damage. Gotcha.
Starting point is 00:10:43 So Jedi damage. Eight points of Jedi damage But I'm not done But wait there's more Stinker Is he in the room with us He hasn't used stinker ever Stinker runs
Starting point is 00:10:58 And charges and then Takes a bite Oh the dreaded stinker bite Jumps up and takes a bite at the Nosferatu's arm. Sferatu. There's no Nos. Sferatu. Sferatu.
Starting point is 00:11:10 Sferatu. Oh, God. It's a Phoenix all over again. I was thinking the same thing. It takes a bite at the bad guy. If it's a Nosferatu, it has nitrogen oxide, so it has like speed boost. Yeah. So extra speed.
Starting point is 00:11:24 Nos. Nice. Flames come out has like speed boost. Yeah. It's an extra speed. Nos. Nice. Flames come out the back. Yeah. Yeah. That's a plus three to hit. And then it's a 1d6 plus one piercing damage. So roll a d20 and add three.
Starting point is 00:11:33 Are they called Nosferatu? Nah. Sferatu. Nah. Stop it. 20. Sorry, 18 plus 21. 21.
Starting point is 00:11:43 That's a hit. Brasferatu. Skalsferatu? Skalsferatu. 18 plus three, so 21. 21, that's a hit. Bra, Sfratu. Skal, Sfratu? Skal. The Sfratu is skanking. Damage, roll damage. Sorry, sorry. We can't make jokes about Sfratu all day, okay? I was reading about the...
Starting point is 00:12:01 Chris, you don't have to yell. He does, but he gets... You have a microphone in front of your mouth. When he's going fast, he goes louder. Oh, I rolled a six, so that's a... A six. Oh, plus one? Nice.
Starting point is 00:12:14 The stinker took a big bite out of him. Got a little bit of his paw. Diminishing returns. I thought it was good. That's so obvious, like, duh, Sriracha. It's good. That's so obvious. Like, duh, Sviratu. That's bad. I hate it now.
Starting point is 00:12:29 Yeah, it does. Welcome to my world. Wait, what? Claw? Sviratu? All right, I'm out. I'm not leaving. I'm getting out of here.
Starting point is 00:12:37 That was so dumb. Ha, ha, ha, Sviratu. Okay, the last one. That was from Promise. Kill me. I feel really blah Sferatu right now. All right. Is there anything else you can do, Chris,
Starting point is 00:12:47 or anything else you want to do? I mean, that's all I... I mean, I guess I move my movement towards as close as I can to get into range. To get as close to what? To the... Ah, Feratu. Seferatu.
Starting point is 00:13:02 Feratu. What is it? Whatever it is. Just say Feratu. Feratu? But with an S in front of it. Seferatu. That is Just say Faratu But with an S in front of it That is what I just did I think that's as close as we're going to get I put an S in front of Sepharatu
Starting point is 00:13:13 Is that it? Yeah you did it that time Well it's debatable Order a pizza Get a Zah He's just sitting here With blankly staring off into the room just going through stuff okay in that case uh we'll have everyone roll initiative at this point then we do we even know how many people or what's in there like do we have a lay of the land at all so this came back
Starting point is 00:13:43 into the commissary which had the two long tables with the various... So we have all of those battlers. Wyatt said that they had started making space when they saw the confrontation. Then when Barney came out and fired that crossbow bolt, they very quickly started making for the exits. Sorry, I was thinking of different straw two puns. So I didn't hear that.
Starting point is 00:14:01 You and me both. I rolled a 22 on initiative. I rolled a nat 20. I rolled a 21. Does that do anything? I I rolled a 22 on initiative. I rolled a nat 20. I rolled a 21. Does that do anything? I also rolled a nat 20. I also rolled a nat 20. I rolled a nat 20.
Starting point is 00:14:11 Could we make it do something? We all rolled a nat 20. Did you? Well, I did, Mati did, and Barney did. I rolled a 19 plus two, 21. Those are some of our collectively best rolls. But I'm a 24. Barney, what's your dex?
Starting point is 00:14:24 My dex is two, or 18. Nice one'm a 24. Barney, what's your dex? My dex is 2 or 18. No, sorry, 15. 15. You just threw out three numbers. 2, 15. Just say the number. So I'm 14, so you would go before me. I see Barney rolled an
Starting point is 00:14:38 initiative of 9. Yeah, I rolled twice because I have my initiative. Oh, right. Oh, wait, I also have advantage on initiative. Do it! You'll get better than a nat 20. Yeah, thank you. I have a question. What does my family look like? Can you describe them to me?
Starting point is 00:14:54 That's a great question. Let me finish my initiative roll right here, and I will get right to that. We all see the family too, right? Maybe you'll find out on your turn. Okay. I'm worried. Top of the
Starting point is 00:15:05 initiative order is Matit, but I know you did have that question there, Chris. So, you know, Chris, when you came out, you very clearly see Marnie, who's a female elf, and she's prone on the ground, and alongside her are two strapping boys, who you recognize as being Samson and Titus.
Starting point is 00:15:21 Cool names. Actually, I'll tell you what, Marnie, why don't you tell me, how do they look? Well, I'm... How old are they? How old do they, like... I mean, Marnie looks exactly like you remember her and like you saw in your dream several episodes ago. As far as Samson and Titus, they're not small boys.
Starting point is 00:15:39 You know, they're strong. They're probably, you know, in their early to mid-teens, you know, from a human perspective. Are those your sons? Yes. Oh. So I would say... Strapping young boys.
Starting point is 00:15:52 Yeah. Samson got dark hair and freckles and looks like his mom. And it's the taller of the two. And then Titus has more of a lighter kind of like dirty blonde hair. Looks like his grandmother on his father's side. So Barney's mom. So your mom. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:09 And it's just a little like a little shorter and then a little like just a little cute, a little pudgy. Okay. I recall your mom is a nice Irish Roman named Blarney Farney. How did you know? Blarney. And then Marnie is, she's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.
Starting point is 00:16:28 And she's got dark hair and freckles and a cute little nose. I like how you described your sons in your voice, Chris, and then your wife as Marnie, which is really sweet. I think Marnie has a soft spot for his wife. I think I want to go introduce myself. They need to meet their Uncle Chip.
Starting point is 00:16:48 We got to save this family, gang. Uncle Chip's got a few people going before him. Oh, shoot. First up in the initiative order is Matide. Then after Matide is Barney. Do I see these people? Yeah, you run into the commissary and the scene looks as I've described. There is a female elf and two boys on the ground who are at the feet of a Sferatu
Starting point is 00:17:09 who is currently being bitten by a stinker and assaulted by a spiritual weapon. Did you say what kind of weapon it was? A stake. Oh, that's right, a stake. Yeah, because you made that super wicked stake joke, remember? Yeah, the New York strip. High five.
Starting point is 00:17:21 Please give me an inspiration. I'm about to die. How many Sferatus are in the room? One Sferatu. Oh, okay. We can take care of that. I'm sure he hasn't called his backup. Is he the only one that seems aggressive?
Starting point is 00:17:34 Correct. The only other people in the room were the battlers who are making their way to the exits. Gotcha. Okay. Well, I suppose I should assist in this battle. I guess I'd rush in. Can I go in? This frog is probably facing away from us, right?
Starting point is 00:17:48 Yeah, he was because he was dealing with Barney. He's probably starting to turn at this point. He might be still. I'll say he's still facing away because of Stinker. Okay. I'm going to stab him with a Spear of Superior Baker. Remind me. I think I have two attacks or two damages.
Starting point is 00:18:04 I guess I should roll for attack first, see if it lands, and then I can ask this question. Another, a nat 20. A nat 20 twice in a row. You are rolling good today. Come on. We should shut down Rooster Teeth more often. I was going to say, you're rolling good.
Starting point is 00:18:19 The 20s are off. It all came out of nowhere, Gustavo. The 20s are off the charts today. Oh, my gosh. Hey, you know, tragedy plus time equals comedy. It's been a day. It's been a day. We need a little more time.
Starting point is 00:18:32 It's been 24 hours. All right, yeah, that's a, yeah, 20. Wow, that's a 29. That's a critical hit. 2D6 plus 6. It has the little symbol that looks like a piercing thing, and then there's 2D8 plus 6. What is the 2d8 plus 6?
Starting point is 00:18:46 So, yeah, it's versatile. So if you'd wield it one-handed, it's 1d6. Then if you wield it two-handed, it's 1d8. And if I wield it two-handed, what is that? I can do that and then switch off of it, right? Because I don't have a shield or anything. Right, exactly. And I'm going to do it with two hands.
Starting point is 00:19:00 Do it. Yeah, it's just to give you that versatility if you want to use a shield or not. Yeah, I'm versatile. Exactly. Zeti is 13 plus the crit. Great. So it did one of your D8s in here.
Starting point is 00:19:10 It did two D8s. So we're going to modify that five to an eight. So we'll add three to this. So 16. Okay. I want to make that a stunning strike. Okay. What does that entail?
Starting point is 00:19:21 That means you do a con save of DC 14. Okay. I have a plus four, which means I need a 10 or better. Don't do it. A three. Yeah. Seven, does that make it? No, it does not.
Starting point is 00:19:35 You are stunned, which is great. Stunned. So since you're stunned, I'm just going to go and keep hitting you. I'm pretty sure it's like a punching bag. You're just like going to use this for out to like speed bag. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah i'm gonna go ahead and do the exact same attack on you again with the spear all right that's a nat 20 again that's a nat 20 again that's
Starting point is 00:19:53 a nat 20 again oh my god yeah so we'll do the same thing again well for uh it's gonna automatically roll the 2d8 we'll make the second one an eight all right right. So that's 20 points of damage. Okay. I'm going to keep hitting him. I'm going to cast Flurry of Blows and kick this vampire. That one's only a 16. That's good. That hits, I should say. Then that does five points of magic piercing damage. With your talents.
Starting point is 00:20:21 Yes. And then I will do it again. That's a bad one. That one. Critical fail. That misses. No, I don't want to use it. Oh, yeah, yeah. I hit him three times Yes. And then I will do it again. That's a bad one. That one. Critical fail. That misses. Uh, no, I don't want to use it. Oh, yeah, yeah. I hit him three times already. Yeah, that's silly. What? I've got six HP.
Starting point is 00:20:31 I'm fine. He's stunned. You might hold on to that spray for later. Alright, just peek behind the curtain. I made a roll to see if you, since you critically failed, if you accidentally stomped on one of the children. And you made it. So you're okay. Oh, okay. Oh, glad that that didn't hand out.
Starting point is 00:20:47 ES2, it's fine. Stomped. They were off balance because they critically failed on their- Stomp is an aggressive word. No, like trying to hit the sferatu. It's also a show in New York. Stomp. Oh, I remember watching that choir class.
Starting point is 00:21:02 I saw Stomp in Austin once. Oh, yeah? Yeah, like 20, God, 25 years ago or something. Wow. I just imagined Gus that night practicing in his underwear in his kitchen. Just going... Why does he have to be in his underwear? Because I always imagined Gus in his underwear.
Starting point is 00:21:17 It's how you're confident enough to speak in front of him, right? Yeah. The second I get home, it all comes off. Okay, that's it for Mati safe in me. All right So Barney you are up your friend Mati that's come through and really put some damage on this fraud to the fraud Who's looking definitely much weaker than before and stunned and stunned? I want to hold up my crossbow to its chest and shoot a bolt into its heart You got it man. You got advantage on this attack. Yeah because of the stun
Starting point is 00:21:43 Normally I'd say, you, an enemy would try to move away or wrestle with you, but because of the stun, we'll let it go. Barney's kind of John Wick-ing. You should let it go. They're stunned. Well, normally all you would get is advantage. I wouldn't say you could like, hold up a crossbow to their heart. Oh, oh, oh, you're talking about him. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:00 19. This could be the coldest kill in the series yet. Yeah, that hits. We did 5 damage. Yeah, that hits too. I only did five damage. But, but! The silverbane bolts, they're coated in silver and offer a plus two bonus to attack and damage rolls. So that's seven points of damage. Do you say anything when you fire the bolt?
Starting point is 00:22:18 Come on, Barney. Come on, Barney. Do not Sferatu today. Yeah. Yeah. Give you some work to do. That was probably good, actually. Yeah, you say that and you pull the trigger on your crossbow and the bolt pierces the Sferatu's heart.
Starting point is 00:22:34 He's talking like Matit. His heart. And for a brief moment, it freezes and its entire form turns to ash and it falls to the ground in a pile at your feet. I have a feeling we might get in trouble for this. Matisse starts shuffling the dust under a carpet. Just using wings to go.
Starting point is 00:22:53 Someone comes in, they're like, have you seen Bill? It's his birthday today. Are we able to reclaim those bolts, the silver bolts? I'll say you can reclaim this one. If you want to look for the other one, it might take a while because it went wide and hit like the wall. Sure. Okay. Barney turns to his family.
Starting point is 00:23:12 Yeah, I guess at this point, Barney would look up and see the Sviratu has turned into Ash and says, Well, this is bad. This is bad. Barney? It's me. Yes, thank you. Yeesh. Does she not recognize you, Marnie? Marnie, it's me, it's Marnie
Starting point is 00:23:30 It's good to meet you, sir I'm standing next to Marnie, right? Yes Since I'm just so awesome Can I tell if they're a ghost? If I were to check Do you have to make a check? You just know, right?
Starting point is 00:23:44 I would imagine Yeah, throw a chair through them. It's like gaydar. Yeah, yeah. It's been perfect up till now. Can I get that? I just haven't used it on you yet. Marnie, from your perspective, what you know, Marnie does not appear to be a ghost, no. It's Marnie. Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:23:59 I'm Marnie. These are my children. Get up, boys. Boys? It's me. It's Dad. They, like, look at each other and, you know, then just kind of, like, start looking. We'll say Samson looks at his feet, and Titus just kind of looks at his mom. It's Barney.
Starting point is 00:24:16 Um, well, we have to go. No, please don't go. Count Fixie will be very angry if we don't finish our tasks, and we'll get in trouble if we're found here with this pile of ash. No, please don't go. Wait, wait. I get in trouble if we're found here with this pile of ash. Please don't go. Wait, wait. I'm going to interject here. Hey, hey, hi.
Starting point is 00:24:28 Hey, it's me. It's Chipaini. How's it going, everybody? Good. That was a heck of a fight. Hey, Marnie, how long have you been in the service of Count Trixie? Just out of curiosity. Count Vixie.
Starting point is 00:24:37 Count Vixie. So sorry. How long have you been working under them? She kind of, like, furrows her brow and looks at you and says, That doesn't make sense do you not know how many years or do you just is it hard to recollect we've always served cam fixie but i like put a number you haven't make me a wisdom check with advantage barney i have a theory not 20 25 you realize someone's missing here oh your daughter calliope is not
Starting point is 00:25:02 here where's calliope? I'm sorry, who? Our daughter. Our daughter? What? She looks a little uncomfortable and says, Like I said, we really must be going. Count Fixie will be very upset with us. How are you able to get up to the quarters of the vamps? She points east.
Starting point is 00:25:18 All right, out that door. Yeah, out the door to the east. The stairwell is just through there. In fact, we should probably be returning there right now. Come on, boys. Wait, no, Marty. She gets her boys by the hand and begins leading them out
Starting point is 00:25:30 and leaves the room to the east. I'm sorry. Well, this is awkward. Yeah, yeah. Anyways, Barney, I think maybe your family has been brainwashed because I believe you when you say that that is them, right? Everyone
Starting point is 00:25:45 right? We believe Barney that that is in fact his family and he is not pretending that other strangers are his family. Barney, I think it also could be a thing like, seems like you've aged but they haven't so maybe there's, you know, what's afflicting Elga is maybe
Starting point is 00:26:01 impacting them as well. Oh, I would not say that. That's not a good thing to say. They did not seem to even know who Barney was. They're like, I'm supposed to be the one who's not supposed to have the tact, yeah. And they also didn't know his daughter, which would be also her daughter and their sister. Well, why, how are... Perhaps what we can do is
Starting point is 00:26:17 Barney... Barney, Gibran's after him. Okay. So you leave east out of the commissary, and you enter a dark chamber echoing with snores and furnished with rows of shoddy coffins and cobwebs in the corner. It seems like some of the coffins are occupied by sleeping battlers. And then from here, there's another door that exits out to the east. And as you walk in, you see those doors closing.
Starting point is 00:26:40 Okay, and Sabani runs towards it. You run through those doors, and you enter a bustling chamber with battlers running in and out from the northern and western doors. The western doors are the ones you just came in. To the east is a rack of identical robes, and to the south is a bench of identical belts. It's like a locker room for battlers, I guess. And do I see... Make a...
Starting point is 00:26:59 Call it an investigation check. Fifteen. Chip's also doing a loose tail on this. So you're following Barney in? Yeah. You don't see Marnie and the boys, but you do notice that the door to the north is closing or has closed as you're entering.
Starting point is 00:27:14 All right, Barney rushes towards it. Marnie and the boys is a great band name, by the way. That is a good name. Marnie and the boys. Yeah, you run to the north, and this is a wooden door that leads down a passage to a stairwell. Can I also ask, and I know this might be too late to do a check or anything like that. Did I recognize them at all?
Starting point is 00:27:36 Make a, let's call it a wisdom check with advantage. Okay. They were like your chambermaids. They cleaned up your poop. Okay, that's a no. your poop oh gosh those are bad rolls four is with advantage because I rolled a nat one one and a three and I
Starting point is 00:27:55 don't have any inspo dice so that is my roll no they do not look familiar to you you've never seen them before that you can recall what if I go and I like rub your eyes as you're doing that quiffly runs in yeah i'm gonna say it sounds like what are you doing i thought you would have gone upstairs by now erica well quickly we have a bit of a situation going on um there was just a uh you know a woman and her two sons in here and my my friend Barney here, this old man who is my friend, don't ask questions.
Starting point is 00:28:27 He claims that they are his family, but they don't seem to remember him. Do you know who they are? I don't see them. Where did they go? Her name is Barney, and their sons are Titus and Samson. I want to say, Barney's not here. He's left. You're like running. Yeah, you say, Barney's not here. He's left. He's already left.
Starting point is 00:28:45 You're like running. Yeah. You're up the other hallway. Yeah. The doorway to the north led to a stairwell that went down. The doorway to the north went down. They led to a stairway that I haven't talked about yet. Copy that.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Barney, Samson, and Titus? That sounds like they could be Count Vixie's battlers. Yes, that's correct. I know of them, but I don't know them very well personally. Are they vampires? No, they're battlers. What does that mean? They're servants for Count Vixie.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Battlers are typically victims of vampire bites that are compared to serve other vampires. Oh, like familiars. Similar, but not quite the same. Do they not age kind of like vampires as well? Yes, that's correct. And who is Count Vixie? He's one of the bigwigs upstairs. Oh, does he?
Starting point is 00:29:34 He's like friends with Dracula kind of bigwig? Yeah, he's worth do. Okay. I want to interrupt your Quiffly conversation. Can I step in as well? Quiffly, this is my friend Chip. He's a... Don't tell my father, but Chip's kind of been like a little father figure to me
Starting point is 00:29:50 this past week. Hey there, Chip Haney, pleasure to meet you. I'm about a sixth of the age of this little one. Don't ask questions, it's weird. Quiffly, when you have a vampire bite like a battler, does that also impact like memory and things like that? What are some of the effects of a vampire bite? Typically, we can't recall our lives from before we were converted.
Starting point is 00:30:16 Is that including you? Yes. This is all I've ever done. That's very unfortunate. Now I feel kind of bad for being part of the system. Well, you benefited from the system. Yikes. But you really should hurry upstairs. Okay, yes.
Starting point is 00:30:33 And that is this way, correct? Correct. Just go east here, through the dressing room, then north, and you'll be at the stairs to go up. Okay, and is that where Count Vixie is as well? Yes, definitely upstairs. All right, team, roll out. Yeah. Quiffly, you can come with us too if you want.
Starting point is 00:30:51 Oh, I can't. I'm still running errands, but I will be upstairs shortly. Hey, we're the Autobats. Roll out. Oh, that's good. I like that. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:02 Chip, I think you and that Quiffly guy are going to be good friends. Yeah, yeah. If I could help him that Quiffly guy Are gonna be good friends Yeah yeah If I could help him Get his memory back That'd be kinda cool Cause you know He has slave owners
Starting point is 00:31:10 Or you know So you guys Follow after Barney Going in the direction That Quiffly told you I would say yes Yeah yeah yeah So Elga, Chip and Mateed
Starting point is 00:31:18 You go east Following Barney And you Enter a dark chamber Echoing with snores Furnished with rows of shoddy coffins and cobwebs in the corner. And some of the coffins are occupied by sleeping battlers.
Starting point is 00:31:30 And there is a door leaving this room to the east. Are there name placards or anything like that that indicate whose bed is what person's? There are no name placards. And Barney's already ahead at this point? Yeah, Barney, we'll say you're going to the stairwell at this point. I'll continue into the locker room place to just keep an eye on Barney's already ahead at this point. Yeah, Barney, we'll say you're, you know, going to the stairwell at this point. I'll continue into the locker room place to just keep an eye on Barney. I don't want to let him get out of my sight too far.
Starting point is 00:31:52 Yeah, so you continue east and you enter the bustling chamber with battlers running in and out from the northern and western doors, which you just came through. Can I grab a belt and a robe? Yeah, to the east is a rack of robes and to the south is a rack of belts. So I guess on your way through, you could just grab a belt from the south and a robe from the east and then continue your way north. The robes appear to be like cheaply made black robes. Make me a perception check.
Starting point is 00:32:15 Six. Sure is a robe. Yep, it's a robe. And the belts are made of leather. Wait a second. Before I put that leather belt on, is this the kind of leather belt that like Carol had is there any like weird Make an investigation check
Starting point is 00:32:27 17 yeah these seem to be Magical belts very similar to the one that Carol was wearing however these belts Do not appear to have fangs or vials Attached but it has like the Signia yeah on the buckle Is a sigil it's the shape of a Red blood drop and inside is the outline
Starting point is 00:32:44 Of a white upside down triangle. Okay. Which would make a sick tattoo. Yeah, bro. Am I right? Had us up. That's Stinky Dragon Pod. What's his voice?
Starting point is 00:32:53 Don't know. I don't like it. It's your broth for all two. Oh. Bring it back. I don't know. I guess I got like my idea is that, you know, we disguise because it seems like we're going further. And I know that we're already in disguise as vampires, but it's been a bad disguise so far.
Starting point is 00:33:09 It's gone fine. We haven't gotten in a fight. So far, Elga just tell everyone that you're her friend and you're good to go. I mean, you can change if you want. I like how I look. Yeah. Yeah. I'll appear to be a battler.
Starting point is 00:33:19 Okay. You could be my battler. So you put on the robe and the belt? Yes. He's a battler in training. He's my bad lad. But Elga and Mateed is still just wearing the cloak from earlier. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:31 Dummy. Barney is a little further ahead up the stairwell. Yeah. I kick Chip. Is there anything else of note in this room? No, just the door you came from and then a door to the north. Okay. All right, shall we continue north?
Starting point is 00:33:43 Go get me some tea now. I think I smell Barney went that way. Yeah, you all go north and you see Barney just a little to the north. Okay. All right, shall we continue north? Go get me some tea now. I think I smell Barney went that way. Yeah, you all go north and you see Barney just a little ahead of you. You know, you're moving maybe a little faster than he is, but when you go through the door to the north, it's a small chamber with an ascending spiral staircase and it is flanked by two igneous stone bat guard goyles
Starting point is 00:33:59 on either side. Oh, there's a passcode probably, huh? Yeah, so at this point, I'll say you catch up to Barney here at the base of the stairwell. should i go up to them and investigate the gargoyles gargoyles see if they're the same type as the ones we saw out of the front gate yeah make a what do you want to call that a wisdom check or perception check i'll leave it up to you uh i'll do perception that is a 20 nice yeah they appear to be very similar to the ones you saw
Starting point is 00:34:23 before outside of the vamp spire. You think it's the same password? Hello, guard girls. Stoker. Stoker. It is me, Elga. May me and my friends pass up here? They're not going to say anything like the other ones as well. There is no response. And you went through fine last time. Yeah, and I'll probably be able to go up
Starting point is 00:34:39 fine. All right, Chip, which one of us will go through? Barney, are you waiting for any of this? Right? Barney seems to be on a mission yeah i think barney would be going oh yeah go go ahead oh yeah you go i mean i can't stop you i can't stop this episode's brought to you by shady race Get ready for the season ahead with quality shades built to last. Our friends at Shady Rays have you covered with premium polarized shades that won't break the bank. Shady Rays is an independent sunglasses company offering a world-class product rated five stars by over 300,000 people.
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Starting point is 00:39:06 New content is added every week. Once again, that's HeroForge.com. H-E-R-O-F-O-R-G-E.com. Start designing your custom miniature right now. All right, so Barney goes through. Does he say anything or do anything? I think he would just charge through it first. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 00:39:26 You don't want to throw, like, a password out? What is a password? Oh, Stoker was the one that got us into the castle. Stoker. Barney, you start rushing through and say the password as you go through. And very, like, with lightning-fast reflexes, one of the gargoyles lashes out and claws at you. And he said Stoker?
Starting point is 00:39:44 Yeah, I figured it was not going to be the same password. Yeah. It hits AC. You never want to use the same password twice. No, it misses. Okay. We'll say it hits you, but the claw bounces off of your armor. Both guard goyles kind of like pop to life and start blocking your way, hissing.
Starting point is 00:40:03 Like blocking my way to the staircase. They attacked you, Barney, and then, you know, the attack bounced off your armor, and then they, you know, kind of hop to life and block the path going forward. Are they, like, living gargoyles, or are they just, like, turrets, I guess? Yeah, what are they made of? It looks like they're Ignis stone, but, you know, they started moving. Like, I don't know if you would say animated or living,
Starting point is 00:40:23 but they are, like, moving. They're not just attacking from like a set position. They actually moved, got up, and then like stood in your way. And they're stone? Yeah. Well, one, I think, do I still have my spiritual weapon? What's the duration on that? One minute.
Starting point is 00:40:37 No. Okay. Would you consider them a stone object? Depending on the context, yes. Because they're not strictly objects, depending on what. Look at stone shape. You touch a stone object, a medium size or smaller, a section of stone no more than five feet in any dimensions,
Starting point is 00:40:52 and form it into any shape that suits your purpose. Maybe. Let me see how big these are. They're medium. It's probably not any bigger than five feet in any direction. Probably right around there. We'll say, yeah, why not? A couple of short kings. All right.
Starting point is 00:41:04 Well, then I touch one of them and I shape it into something silly. Something goofy. Go on. It's your imagination Green Lantern. Something so silly. I shape it. Come on. Comedy podcast. You can do it. I just don't think that Barney's in a comedic mood. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So then what's his
Starting point is 00:41:21 make them into something sad. I make it into a sword shape. You made them a weapon. No, no, but like an animal. You could have gone with like a tree. Okay, well, I was going to say a sword, then I could pick it up and stab the other one with itself. Okay, yeah, you make the gargoyle into a stone.
Starting point is 00:41:43 Let him cook, Matee. Oh, yeah, a five-foot... Yes, Sam. All right, all right, no, this, I do this. I didn't say don't do it. I just pointed out. You make the gargoyle into a stone. Let him cook, Mateen. That's fine. I didn't say don't do it. I just pointed out. That's attached to the ground. So it's just a block. So you turn him into a stone block.
Starting point is 00:41:54 That's clear. Merged with the ground of the stone. Okay. So you make like a Minecraft stone block. Makes it into a swamp for Mario. I don't want to be a negative person, but he just made something that blocked the stairwell more. No, no, like
Starting point is 00:42:09 no, that doesn't block the way like that's just like a thing on the ground. I think we could fly over it. So a five foot cube of stone. Yeah, and it doesn't block the doorway, right? The stairwell? Visually, you can push it out of the way. I'm pushing it out of the way i'm not gonna be okay
Starting point is 00:42:26 that's fine that's fine i'm not gonna be difficult i was trying to point it out so that chris could potentially turn into something that was helpful if needed i got you so uh one of the guard goyles turns into that can you do anything about the other one well that was my i guess action so then my bonus action man i'm running out we're not in combat just fyi not in combat, just FYI. We're not. Have you rolled initiative? Yeah, but I mean, if you don't do too much, otherwise we roll initiative. Yeah, yeah. Let's keep it loose. Let's keep it fun.
Starting point is 00:42:51 Let's keep it rolling. Jeez, I'm running out of things to do. I'm running out of things to do. If only you had a stone sword. I know. You've got to stop. You're just being that way. I just can't imagine stabbing a stone statue with a stone sword.
Starting point is 00:43:06 I want to use my bonus action, and I want to shove it out of the way with my telekinetic powers. So it shoves to the side so I can continue on my way. Is there a weight limit on that? No. A target must succeed a strength saving throw of DC 16 or removed five feet. I was about to say, it can move anything, Gus. He can move a mountain five feet. Yeah. One creature within five feet. I was about to say, it can move anything, Gus. He can move a mountain five feet. One creature within 30 feet.
Starting point is 00:43:29 Can Mati do something while Barney's doing this? Yeah, why not? I want to go back in the last room we were in. Okay. Okay. Grab my crossbow. No, the room before that. After that.
Starting point is 00:43:40 You're going to get a running start. No, it's the sleeping room. Okay, the sleeping room. Got it. It failed its save. I rolled an eight get a running start. No, it's the sleeping room. Okay, the sleeping room. Got it. It failed its save. I rolled an eight plus four. That's a 12. So it gets shoved aside and I run past it and continue.
Starting point is 00:43:50 Okay. Yeah, the guard seems very shocked at this turn of events. I don't know if anyone's ever shoved it. It doesn't make any sense. And then, yeah, you run past. As you run past, Matide runs back out to the room with the sleeping battlers. Well, I was going to do that because I didn't think that it was going to get shoved. But let's say Matide witnesses this.
Starting point is 00:44:11 Does the guard girl get back into place? Yeah, I think the guard girl would reset back to its neutral position where it was initially. Okay, then I would like to go in the sleeping room. Okay. Can I find a little sleeping battler and just go up to him and go and like just try to like whisper like excuse me, I am new here as a battler. What's the
Starting point is 00:44:31 password to get upstairs to the vampires? Just put on a belt. Oh, okay. I forgot. You know, new stuff. Thank you. Go to sleep. I go back in and grab two four belts. No, you only need three. Well, I want to give one to the man that ran, just in case you need it. I think Blaine has one on already, right?
Starting point is 00:44:50 You put one on? Yeah, I'm in disguise. You said I was stupid. You said, oh, I like the way I look. I guarantee it, Ben's Warehouse. Chipain, you're not so dumb now, is he? Oh. Chimney not so dumb now is he I grab three belts Put one on and give one to
Starting point is 00:45:15 Elga although Elga could just probably Pass through right yeah do I need one I don't know I grab one just in case could I try to go through Before yeah you pass through and the guard Does not move or react at all. Matisse, you don't need to get me a belt. Okay, then I just have my belt and I'm holding one for Barney.
Starting point is 00:45:31 And I approach the gargoyle and act like I'm walking through. You strap on the belt and you're able to pass right through. No problem. As I pass the gargoyle, I say, that's right. I walk through as well. Okay, yeah. You follow your friends. Oh, I tell the gargoyle,, that's right. I walk through as well. Okay, yeah. You follow your friends. Oh, I tell the gargoyle, don't let him through.
Starting point is 00:45:49 Barney, I assume you put yours on? Barney's off. Okay. So y'all begin running up the stairs, or going up the stairs following Barney, who seems to be charging ahead. Everyone roll me a perception check. That's maybe a good one, I can tell.
Starting point is 00:46:02 Nat 20, 24. What is it? This is the Nat 20 episode. No, I love it. 15 good one. I can tell. Nat 20, 24. What is it? This is the Nat 20 episode. No, I love it. 15. 12. Yeah. 8. You plus me, me equals a 20.
Starting point is 00:46:12 Yeah. You're just too busy looking at your belt. It's a new shiny belt. Reminds me of when my wife died. Which you needed assistance for. Go ahead and give yourself an inspiration. Hey! Chip.
Starting point is 00:46:26 It works. You see, it's just, you just gotta, it's, what is it? Pity? No, it's quantity over quality. All right, so we'll deal with you, Chip, first. It's just maybe the pressure of all of this, you know, the chaos of the Tales of Dock running up here to the next level. Like, it's just, maybe it's getting to you because all you can see right now is red. Mateed, you see this is an extensive hallway that seems circular.
Starting point is 00:46:51 It's adorned with red velvet carpet and is lit by golden sconces and ornamental glass chandeliers. Great tea. Barney, you're in the same boat as Mateed. Maybe you're, like, rushing ahead. Get out of my boat. Elga, you know, or you see, of course, each door is lavishly and uniquely decorated, either with gold, jewelry, you know, fancy things, but none of them are labeled.
Starting point is 00:47:13 And in the distance, you think you hear bells. These resonate much deeper. Okay. Do I like recognize this hallway? Yeah, you know this area. Like I said, all these doors are unique and lavishly decorated. And you remember what the door to your home looks like. What does it look like, Kim?
Starting point is 00:47:28 At the same time. Ready? One, two, three. You can construct it. So the door to like essentially our home. So it's a dark black door and it has. Like what kind of material is it? Like onyx or some exotic material or is it like a black wood?
Starting point is 00:47:46 Onyx is cool. It's a good Pokemon. And it's got gems kind of decorating it all the way down, and it says, uh, big VB in gold, with, like, kind of, like, cursive writing. When you say gems all the way down, do you mean covering the entire door, or, like, in columns going down the door?
Starting point is 00:48:02 Columns going down. That would be good. I dazzled it. Oh. Pstripes. Yeah, I got bored one afternoon, you know. Eternity of living gets a different time. Just being in a vampire. It's bedazzled. But like the tiny little chips. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:17 So from a metagame perspective, you know, Elga, since you grew up here and you know many of the Count families up here, while you're here on this level of the VAMP Spire, make sure if you do any charisma based checks, you have advantage on them when like, when, when dealing with other counts and their families. Okay, cool. So I must know if I'm familiar with this hallway and our door, I must be familiar with who lives where, right? To an extent.
Starting point is 00:48:43 The problem is you don't remember where your door is But I know what it looks like. Yeah, you'll know it when you see it. Let's go find it Well, are we also not trying to find accounts or come tricksy Dixie Dixie Dixie? Sure, we could do both Barney's off right yeah, I'll say you caught up to Barney. Like, you're kind of like rubberbanding here. So you catch up to Barney here and then it's up to, like, Barney or you guys
Starting point is 00:49:12 if, you know, it's gonna continue. All right, let's find the Vixie. Wait, so we're all collectively in this, like, it's a circular room, you said? It's like a circular hallway. Oh, everyone else, do you realize Chip is looking at the ground? He's looking at the floor. Low perception, you know me.
Starting point is 00:49:26 That's why all he saw was red. Yeah. So the floor is red. Looking all around, it's like, so it's like a bunch of doors, like.
Starting point is 00:49:34 Yeah, it's a seemingly like almost endless doors. It's like your block, your cul-de-sac. Okay, look through all the different, was there any movement
Starting point is 00:49:41 when I came in? Well, we heard bells, he said. He wants to know if a door closed, kind of like he saw help money. Making perception check for me, Barney. Okay.
Starting point is 00:49:51 Solid 12. Not bad. Better than a fragile 12. It's hard to tell. You didn't necessarily hear anything else. Just maybe the shock of the opulence and the ringing of the bells kind of drowned other things out. The bells? And you said they are deeper sounding, right?
Starting point is 00:50:05 Yeah, not like a small ting, ting, ting, ting, but like a deeper resonating bell. Like a big, heavy bell? Not like a cathedral or a church bell, right, but somewhere in between. Is it because we're near the source, or is this a different, do you think that this is a different significant type of bell?
Starting point is 00:50:20 I have to investigate that. Yeah, we'll have to find out. And I'm sorry, I should have said this earlier. Elgar, you also know the name of this level of the Vamspire. Just like the first level was the Tales of Dock, you know that this level of the Vamspire is called the Clostrid. Welcome to the Clostrid. This is where my residence is.
Starting point is 00:50:39 The Heads of Dock. That's lovely. And I know the meaning of Clostrid, correct? Yeah, what is it? It is... A claustrophobic... I don't know if Elga would have ever thought to wonder about that or ask that. It's like, it's just reality.
Starting point is 00:50:56 It's like one of the things you don't think about. Are we allowed to know? Maybe we'll find out. Well, let's go to the... Let's see if we can refresh your memory and find the Vixie house. I hear those bells. Should we go towards those? We could do that as well.
Starting point is 00:51:10 I'm easy peasy. Someone's getting married or died. Or both. You know, bells mean multiple things. Sorry, go ahead. So your door has a VC for your... Nope. What was it?
Starting point is 00:51:20 VB. VB. Do any of the doors have lettering that might indicate who the... He said none of them had signage on them. Yeah, they're not really labeled, except for presumably the one that has a VB on it. It must be funny for everyone's V, because it's just vampires.
Starting point is 00:51:35 It's just V. It's not helpful. I will say this, just to expand on something that was asked a little earlier. From your understanding, Elga, Clostrid is like, it's a name. It's like an ancient Vanian name. It's just a street name.
Starting point is 00:51:49 So it doesn't mean anything? Right. It's just like... Because I know Tales of Dark was like... Right. That had a meaning. This is just more like a name. It's named after something.
Starting point is 00:51:57 Is there a heads of dark? Perhaps. Get out. Okay. I'm going to flip this coin. Give you my inspiration back. So Elga doesn't know where Vixie is, right? Correct.
Starting point is 00:52:06 Okay. I go to a door and knock on it. Old. Yeah. Well, that's what I am. Okay. You knock on it and you hear a voice on the other side say, I'm in.
Starting point is 00:52:15 Oh, this did not go the way I thought it was going to go. I open the door. You open the door and it opens up into a foyer. Oh, is there someone there? Yeah. In the middle of the foyer, you see a golden haired Mohawk halfling. Oh. Who's like looking around at the wall with their back to you. Looking around at the wall with their back to me.
Starting point is 00:52:33 Bonjour. Shush. Oh, I'm, I'm. Shh. Oh. They're right here. Who's, who's here? Do you hear it?
Starting point is 00:52:41 Oh. Right there. She points at the wall. Is it a rat? She's just pointing at the wall. I look at the wall. There doesn't appear to be anything there. I hear them. What do you hear it? Right there. She points at the wall. Is it a rat? She's just pointing at the wall. I look at the wall. There doesn't appear to be anything there. I hear them.
Starting point is 00:52:49 What do you hear? Rats. Okay, I'm going to let you deal with that on your own. I'm here to deliver a package to Count Vixie. Do you know which door it is? Down the hall. But what's it look like? It's the one that Count Vixie has.
Starting point is 00:53:03 Yeah, if I'm asking you which door, I'm asking for more than that. I can't be bothered with that right now. I'm in the middle of something. It's because it is what it is. What size is this person? It's a halfling, so pretty small. It's a halfling? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:15 I walk in and I grab them. What are you doing? You put Countess Vixoft down. Countess what? Vixoft. Vixoft? Yeah. Which door is Count Vixoft down. Countess what? Vixoft. Vixoft? Yeah. Which door is Count Vixie?
Starting point is 00:53:27 How dare you lay your hands on me, battler? I'm not a battler. I'm dressed like a vampire. She points at the belt you're wearing. I've been explaining that. It's underneath my cloak. Caution statement. It's like wearing Carhartt, but you're rich.
Starting point is 00:53:42 I rip it off. You rip the belt off? Sure. Oh, no. Yeah, he doesn't have one on. This might not be good. You go to take the belt off, and you find you can't get it unfastened. That's cool. Oopsie.
Starting point is 00:53:57 That's fine. I don't care that you think I'm a battler. Switch doors, and I will leave you alone to the rats. You are speaking to the partner of Count Vixie. Oh. Well, then why did you point it down the hallway? Because I'm Switch doors and I will leave you alone to the rats. You are speaking to the partner of Count Vixie. Oh. Then why did you point it down the hallway? Because I'm busy and I don't know where he is.
Starting point is 00:54:12 Wait, are you in your home or someone else's home? I'm in my home looking for the rats. Wait, do you live with Count Vixie? Yes. So when you point it down the hallway... He's down there somewhere. I don't know where. You're very bad at this. I'm busy.
Starting point is 00:54:24 Okay. I put the halfling down and I dust them off and I go thank you for your help yes are your battlers in you no that's why I'm looking for the rats oh okay I will let maintenance knows that you have a rat problem okay you have a wonderful day. Get out. Knock, knock. Maintenance here. Kick him out of the door. Kick him out of the door. Tackle Chip to the ground and close the door. Did somebody order a pizza? Which direction did they point?
Starting point is 00:54:57 Further down the hallway. Because you all came in up the stairs, and then this was presumably the first door, and then there's more doors. I make note of what that door is that I just came through so I remember it. Okay. Can we start going down like through the doors to see if I recognize my door? What did they
Starting point is 00:55:12 say? Vicksoft? Vicksoft. Yeah. And yes you can as well Barbara. Vicksee and Vicksoft. Vicksee and Vicksoft. I feel like they might be related. They're partners. Yeah they're partners. Right but like. It might be incestuous. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's what I'm getting at.
Starting point is 00:55:27 How dare you make that claim of them players? Yeah, nobility never does that. Let's go down the hallway. Yeah. Or Matide goes down the hallway. Yeah. Did you explain what you found in there? No, I just go without explaining. Okay. No, I say that. Okay, that's what convicts these rumors, but they are not.
Starting point is 00:55:43 Let's go. Okay, let's go. And I'm going to be looking at are not. They are done always. Let's follow me. Okay, let's go. And I'm going to be looking at the doors to see if I recognize mine on the way down. And I knock on all the doors as I walk by. Do you? I've got a lot to talk about if you're doing that. I just ding dong ditch every single one of them. Awful. Actually, I'll tell you what.
Starting point is 00:56:00 Everyone make me a perception check. Does Stinko need to go potty? I have a bag I'd like to put in right now. 18. 18. 15. What was I rolling? I was making a poop joke. Perception.
Starting point is 00:56:10 Six. That's a 14. I am the perception master now. Behold! He's looking up. Behold! I see all. Well, you are in a way, Chip.
Starting point is 00:56:21 You can tell as you're going down the hallway that the floor is continually rising. Like you're going in a spiral. So even though you're going in a circular hallway, you're continuing to rise as if you're going up a spire. Okay. So yeah, you go for several minutes until finally you do see a door that looks familiar, Elka. What did it look like again? do see a door that looks familiar, Elka. What did it look like again? A big black onyx door with gems all
Starting point is 00:56:46 the way down and vertical lines with a VB written in gold cursive. That was it, yeah. This is the one. This is it. You found it. He just goes, that's not the one. This one has all of that except the VB is not in cursive. It's
Starting point is 00:57:01 BV. Pond Vat. Yeah. Maybe's BV. Oh. Bon Vat. Yeah. Maybe they're partners. Yeah. Bon Vat. Could I open the door? Yeah, you open the door. Guys, this is my place. Okay, it was lovely meeting you. We will see you later. Just make sure to
Starting point is 00:57:18 take your shoes off. We're dropping your little girl off. Yeah, I don't think Barney... Lovely home bye. Well, maybe my family could help figure out what's going on and where your family is and what's going on with them and how to maybe break this curse. Yeah, Barney, I think we lost
Starting point is 00:57:33 the scent and, you know, I think Elga's family could probably help us. But if you want to go off and separate from the group, that's great D&D tactics. You know, from what I heard. I don't... I can't leave them again. Right, we're not saying leave them. You've already left them.
Starting point is 00:57:50 They've left you. They're in the building. We are going to figure out where they are in the building and maybe more information of what is their situation from experts of the building and their situation. We got to formulate a strategy here, Barn. We can't just rush in headlong. You know, I think that this is the right path forward.
Starting point is 00:58:07 I know how you feel, though. At least we know they're here. They could not have left the building. Yeah, do you know if they're in Elga's room? Okay. Okay. Let's go in. So you open the door?
Starting point is 00:58:18 Yeah. Elga, yeah. Is it open? Yeah, it's unlocked. You open the door, and similar to the previous home you went into, the door opens into a palatial foyer adorned with immaculate marble fountain bubbling with blood. On either side of the fountain are two respective chains, one with a ruby handle and the other with an ivory handle.
Starting point is 00:58:35 Do I remember what these chains do? Make me a wisdom check with advantage. I bet it's the difference between the kinds of bells that it rings. One's baller and the other one's that deeper one. Okay, that is a 17 and then a, so 17. Yeah, you do remember. The ruby chain, if you pull it, it rings bells alerting Sfratu of an emergency. Oh.
Starting point is 00:58:54 The ruby one, okay. Yeah, and then the one with the ivory chain rings Quiffly's personal bell to summon him. Ah. You said his belt? Bell. Oh, okay. Wait, does that mean that those bells that we heard earlier, the deeper ones, are summoning Sfratu here? Don't know. We said his belt? Belt. Oh, okay. Wait, does that mean that those bells that we heard earlier, the deeper ones, are summoning Sfratu
Starting point is 00:59:08 here? Don't know. We don't know. But possibly. Uh-oh. And from this foyer, you can either go west or east. Let's go west. Alright, come on, guys. Come on into my mi casa, su casa. Welcome in. Su casa. So formal, Elka.
Starting point is 00:59:23 Don't touch any of anything Okay, thank you It's like that feeling when you were a kid You went to one of your friends' house And you're just kind of like Anxious, you know Or like when you're showing people around your house as a kid And you're just like
Starting point is 00:59:36 That's where I sat and I ate my bubble gum And then this is the window I looked out And I saw a pigeon flying That's how Blaine introduces his house as an adult Yeah, it's true You walk west into the unliving room and I saw a pigeon flying. That's how Blaine introduces his house as an adult. Yeah, it's true. Very true. You walk west into the unliving room.
Starting point is 00:59:50 Oh, that's good. Oh, Micah, you. Here, you find a brick fireplace that lights what would be a cozy unliving room, but right away you notice all of the furniture is overturned, including overstuffed Oryx leather armchairs and a couch made from scales. Like someone was looking for something? Or like a cool party. It's been ransacked. Like it doesn't look like intentional. including overstuffed aurochs leather armchairs and a couch made from scales. Like someone was looking for something?
Starting point is 01:00:06 Or like a cool party. It's been ransacked. Like it doesn't look like intentional, it looks like. Correct. Okay. A jewel-framed painting that clearly once hung over the fireplace now lies ripped near the cinders of the fireplace. Oh my goodness. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 01:00:17 Well, can I see what the painting showed? Yeah, you take a look at it, and it appears to be a family portrait with a Jacinthe-encrusted frame. The painting has been marred, and it looks like it fell on the fire stoker and some ember-cinged parts of the portrayal. All that's left are two little girls. You recognize, of course, Elga, but on the portrait as well is Avena, who is straight-faced with piercing blue eyes, wearing a black blouse and blue skirt. Elga, what did you look like in this painting? In this painting, I look the exact same as I do now.
Starting point is 01:00:46 I'm holding Boris, my teddy bear. And I also have a red cardigan over my clothes that I don't currently have with me right now. Nice. But curly blonde hair, kind of cream blouse with my locket on and then my red skirt. May I see this, the painting? Yeah, I'm not gonna tell you what to do with your eyeballs.
Starting point is 01:01:05 Is it on the floor or on the wall? Yeah, it's on the wall. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's on the floor. Can Barney pick it up and cast an ending? Yeah. Why not? Now we see the parent reveal. I'm imagining it's the scene in Beauty and the Beast where she sees the
Starting point is 01:01:22 painting of the prince and like pushes the fabric up and it like reveals his face. She goes, oh, gross. Puts it back down. Beats better. Reading through Mending,
Starting point is 01:01:30 it wouldn't fix the entire painting, but it would kind of restore it a bit. It kind of, you know, fixes some of the singed portions and, you know, repairs some of the tears. Parts of it are still missing though because they're burnt off.
Starting point is 01:01:42 So Mending can fix like tears, but not necessarily things that have been burned and destroyed it's happening here i feel like those faces are gonna be important yeah do we see the faces no but is it clear you can't see it's not just the faces that are missing it's like a lot of the body as well could i tell if it's just one body or if it's like two or more like where they're originally is there room for like two people if it's just one body or if it's like two or more? Like where there originally is a room for like two people. If there's me and my sister. Is it mama?
Starting point is 01:02:09 You would presume there's enough room for two people in that space. Oh wow, this is crazy because I haven't seen my mother in a very long time. Perhaps we should investigate the other side of your, or maybe there's more to investigate in here. You haven't seen your mother in a very long time? No. Can you elaborate? She left when I
Starting point is 01:02:25 was pretty young. To get like cigarettes or something? I don't really know why, but she was an elf. So I don't know what else. Maybe she had some duty to do. I don't know. And what, was she like
Starting point is 01:02:42 you? No. We really should have asked each other more You know I started to realize we're all just kind of strangers For a week, yeah, it's true you chip you tell us everything anything that comes into your brain Let's save some of that book for later Yeah, do we see anything else in this room? Like anything? Nothing else.
Starting point is 01:03:07 Just a door leading to the north and a door leading to the south. And you, of course, Elga, know that the door to the south leads to your room and the door to the north leads to Ivana's room. Can I look for Count Von Brass' Vlad Bonk card? Nice. It doesn't appear to be in here. Dang it, Robin. Let's go to my room.
Starting point is 01:03:24 Yeah. You guys want to see my room? I'm sure everything will be perfectly intact in there. Yeah. Yeah. Like I said, it's the door to the south. Why don't you tell them what it looked like before you lead everyone in there? How did it used to look?
Starting point is 01:03:35 What did that room look like? Fear of the mind here, Gus. I like it. Barbara gets to play Sims right now. We're coming into my room. It's not that big. It's pretty humble size, but I have one little twin bed, and it has
Starting point is 01:03:48 a black post on it. It's like one of those canopy beds. With white sheets. And then I have my toys in the corner. I have my play stuff, like my dollhouse. And Boris should be in there, I think. Oh, I see
Starting point is 01:04:04 you had the latest Slay Station 2. I like to play Bloodborne on it. I don't know if that's a PlayStation game or not. It is. It's actually a PlayStation exclusive, or it used to be. Is it PC now? I think they ported it. I don't know if it's PC.
Starting point is 01:04:19 I think it is. I think people complained about the quality of the PC port, if I remember right. Anyway. Let's talk about that a little more. That's not D&D. Yeah, as you're saying that, you open up room, or you open up the door to your room, and as it opens, you see, much like the unliving room, it is also in disarray as if it's been ransacked.
Starting point is 01:04:34 Goodness. Is Boris still here? One item does stand out amongst the rest. You do see your teddy bear, Boris. Boris! She picks it up and cuddles it. I shake Boris's little paw. Hey there, Chip, Andy, pleasure to meet you. Oh, Boris, I still miss you too, Chip. Thank you very much.
Starting point is 01:04:49 Oh, Boris is talking. Whoa. And then Elgo, like, proceeds to, like, dance with the two of them. Yeah, oh, cute. I feel like you guys should have a talk with Quiffly. He's not doing a very good job of keeping your house in order. Yeah, I'm very confused with what's going on here. I did not leave my room like this.
Starting point is 01:05:04 I'm not very, you know, I'm a little messy sometimes, but no, not like this. Maybe we get quickly in here and get some man cells. Do I see any clues of, like, who might have done this? Make an investigation check. Can I also look around just to see if there's anything of interest or any... Barney's gonna steal from Elga. Not, not, I don't want to steal, but...
Starting point is 01:05:21 Fifteen. Like, starts putting, like, silverware in his little thing. It's silver for later. I rolled an investigation. I don't want to steal, but... 15. Like, starts putting, like, silverware in his little thing. It's silver for later. I rolled an investigation. I don't know if it matters. Tell me what your roll was. 16. 16.
Starting point is 01:05:32 Okay, I'm going to deal with Elga first. You don't find any clues, like, nothing like footprints or nothing very obvious that would lead you right to make you think it was a particular person. Barney, the only interesting things in here would be if you were were elga i think like boris uh dolls okay a black canopied bed i pull the white chain out in the foyer you don't want to go to the other room there was another room yeah well there's avina's room we could also go east east of the foyer yeah okay well let me go see if my sister's room looks like this, too, because if it doesn't, I have high suspicions she might have done this. You walk across the unliving room to the northern side, and, you know, Avena's room,
Starting point is 01:06:12 the door is closed. I assume you open it and walk in? Yeah. You open up the door, and it's a dark room with clothes, bedding, and belongings strewn about the room. A ripped book sits open next to the bed. What is that? Can I go look at the book?
Starting point is 01:06:23 There's a ripped book. Is it ripped pages or ripped, like, cover? Cover. Okay. So you said you looked at it, right, Elga? Yeah. Yeah, you take a look, and cover says, Boutour des Minte.
Starting point is 01:06:35 It seems to be a book written in an ancient form of Vanian, with strange symbols, diagrams, like teeth, stars, moons, and more. And heart stars and rainbows. Do I understand it? Like, could I read this language? You're familiar with Vanian, but this is like an older form. It would be like modern times trying to read like old English where you can pick up on some of it, but a lot of it's very different.
Starting point is 01:06:58 And does it look like her room also got like ransacked? Yeah, I mean, things are strewn all around. And, you know, as you're flipping through the book, you notice a page seems to be ripped out and is missing. I know it's a dumb question. Which page? Like, is it like... It's hard to say.
Starting point is 01:07:10 It's like in the middle of the book. And I can't tell by context of what was before and after it. No, it's like you're able to pick out words here and there, but no real greater context. Butter Demon? That's an interesting book. What's that about? Butter Demon? I was like, what is he talking about?
Starting point is 01:07:25 What are you talking about? The joke came and went, and then I was just like, I'll throw it in. Hold on to that one for later? It's definitely later in the book, like in the mid-200s pages. Okay. We had an encounter with missing pages in the library, too. Do I also recognize this book as something Avena owned before? You feel like this is a book she would have.
Starting point is 01:07:45 Okay. Check the front. See if she stands her name at the library. Avena's into all sorts of weird stuff. She's more of the reading type. You're more of the beating. Yeah. You know, I read my own books like Here Come the Choo Choo Train and things like that. I never got past
Starting point is 01:08:02 the sixth grade level reading. One bat, two bat, red bat, blue bat. I do not like green eggs and blood. Everyone make me a perception check. 18. I think that's the version of Gus being in the room as the teacher and putting their two fingers up to get our attention. Yeah. 20, six, eight.
Starting point is 01:08:23 Not one or critical fail, so five. So the highest ones were Barney was 20 and Chip with 18, is that correct? I see all, know all. Barney and Chip, you know, as, you know, Elga's flipping through the book, for some reason, something draws your two set of eyes
Starting point is 01:08:39 up to the ceiling. Yeah. And you notice scrawled on the ceiling in blood are strange glyphs and candle wax laid out in a triangle. Oh, that's a Vina. Always with her art projects. Always been doing arts and crafts on the ceiling. Are those like constellations or is that like a new band?
Starting point is 01:09:01 Like a poster? There's candles. Could I ask if I recognize this as being the room from that nightmare I had? Make a wisdom check with advantage. 16. Yes, it is the same room from your nightmare. Okay. Because I was on the ceiling.
Starting point is 01:09:18 Yeah, the blood and the wax and stuff. Maybe. Did she like summon me in a dream to the ceiling? You know, summon circles? Maybe. What's your like, summon me in a dream to the ceiling? You know, summon circles? Maybe. What's your relationship like with your sister, Elga? You know, it used to be okay, but I guess she just started acting weird
Starting point is 01:09:33 at some point, and I don't know. Was this, like, in the most, like, before your trip? Like, very recently? Or has this been, like, a long run-in thing? Not too long, but you know, my parameter of time is kind of off a little bit. So is mine. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:50 You and me, Barney, so old. This thing, does it, do we, can I, I guess I don't have like some detect magic,
Starting point is 01:09:58 but I'm kind of like, is there anything I can. Do any of us recognize the glyphs or anything? Yeah. Like, do they look like what's in the book? You can do an arcana check. Exactly. Y'all can make an arcana check. Exactly.
Starting point is 01:10:05 Y'all can make an arcana check if you want to try to figure that out. We're all good on intelligence. Yeah, it's like your forte, right? Seven. Nine. Eleven. Yeah, it's Greek to you. But does it look like what I saw in the book?
Starting point is 01:10:17 Like in the book you just saw? Yeah, it compares. Yeah, sure. Okay. So it's probably page she ripped out, maybe, is what she used up on the scene. Probably. And none of us can read the book, right? Have we all checked?
Starting point is 01:10:30 Correct. Okay. Do you want to go to the other space? I know there's one more room. Why don't you hold on to that book, Elka? Yeah, I'm going to take it with me. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 01:10:38 Put it in my bum bag. Cool. Okay, well, this is weird. Something is definitely amiss in the Von Braff household. Yeah, your house is a little creepy. Well, thank you. You might fire quickly. I don't think you can be fired.
Starting point is 01:10:52 Set my flame. That's a bit dark. Cool. So shall we move on? Yeah. What's the other rooms? Yeah, Elga, you know, east of the foyer is the parlor and the room for Countess Von Brath and the room for Count Von Brath. There's those kinds of people for Countess Von Brath and the room for Count Von Brath.
Starting point is 01:11:06 There's those kinds of people. Countess Von Brath is your mother? One would assume. And they sleep apart? Oh, I guess your mom's no longer around. Real smooth there, Chip. I just assumed you was a big snorer. Yeah, you know, everyone likes having their own space.
Starting point is 01:11:22 You know, like me and my sister, we're twins and we have different rooms, which some people might think is weird. But it's a big place, you know, we want to take advantage of the square footage. Yeah, it's rich folk stuff. Let's go to the parlor. Yeah, you cross east of the foyer and walk over to the parlor. What would be a posh parlor is now tarnished. Nevertheless, it is furnished with a marble countertop bar, jasper stone stools, a fire opal chandelier, and a pipe organ with ruby keys.
Starting point is 01:11:47 Cool. I kind of want to play Diddy on that. Do it. Can I play the organ? Performance check. Can I play the organ? Yeah, you can try. You got experience.
Starting point is 01:11:56 Does Chip have experience playing the pipe organ? Oh. You know, sometimes I volunteer at the Little League baseball games. Oh. You know sometimes I volunteer at the little league baseball games Oh Ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba Ba da da da da da
Starting point is 01:12:09 Yeah make a performance check, let's try it out Okay Blood Ha ha ha Ha ha ha Blood Ooh that's a 20 Ooh
Starting point is 01:12:15 Ba ba ba ba Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You uh, you tickled a ruby Uh and uh let out some old uh ballpark tunes Ha ha ha ha ha Hot dogs, get your hot dogs Oh god I miss my mom You tickled a ruby and let out some old ballpark tunes. Hot dogs, get your hot dogs. Oh, God, I miss my wife. We need to find my family. So many families are missing right now.
Starting point is 01:12:36 I know where mine is. Where? They're dead. You know, Matita, I'm starting to think mine might not be alive anymore either. Maybe, we don't know. It's so mysterious. I'm scared. Let mine might not be alive anymore either. Maybe. We don't know. It's so mysterious. I'm scared. Let's go to your mother's room.
Starting point is 01:12:48 Why not? Well, we are in this... Parlor. In the parlor, yeah. To the south from here. So it's like a mirror image of the other side. The parlor is like a mirror image of the unliving room. To the south, like a mirror image of your room, is Countess von Brath's room.
Starting point is 01:13:00 Okay. And then to the north is Count von Brath's room. Is there something else in here that we could look at? No. Okay. So do you want to head south to the north is Count Von Brasser. And there's nothing else in here that we could like look at? No. Okay. So do you want to head south to the Countess's room? Yes. You head south and open up the door and you find a room filled with bookcases and shelves of books, tomes, maps, sky charts, and scrolls.
Starting point is 01:13:18 A wooden rickety rocking chair sits in the center atop a simple rug. Many of the reading materials are in an unrecognizable language, but they all seem to circle around the subject of conjuration and divination magic, specifically planar arts. Huh. Mama's a bit of a nerd, huh? Yeah, she studied a lot, and I think that's where Avena got her love of
Starting point is 01:13:37 reading and science and all this stuff. But plan? I wonder if she knows about the Feywild or anything like that, or other planes. Astallia? That wonder if she knows about the Feywild or anything like that or other planes. Astalia? That's relevant to my interest. Right. Should we start taking a look at the
Starting point is 01:13:53 bookshelves? Yeah. Your mom has been gone for a while. You seem to be very interested in my mom, Barney. I'm just trying to understand what's going on. Yeah, she's been gone a while. I don't, we don't really know what happened. My father hasn't really told me much. I just kind of dealt
Starting point is 01:14:09 with it. Can I look and see? By becoming a barbarian who has rage issues. Can I look? Can I look and see if any of the, if there's like dust that has been unsettled recently, like. That's a smart call. Like any, you know, like something's disturbed. Yeah, like assuming no one's been in this room for a while. It's possible smart call. Like something's disturbed?
Starting point is 01:14:25 Yeah, assuming no one's been in this room for a while. It's possible Avina, though, has been in. Sure, but then that might also indicate something, yeah. Why don't you make me a perception check, Barney? And I say aloud my plan. Okay. I will also look around for unsettled dust.
Starting point is 01:14:43 I got a 23. Matit flaps their wings and disturbs everybody. Yeah, the room appears to be undisturbed, Arnie. However, in your investigation or when you're looking around, you do notice that the rug appears to not be centered in the room and one of the corners is folded over.
Starting point is 01:15:00 Can I pull back the rug? Yeah, you pull the rug out. You pull back the rug and you find there's a trap door hidden underneath the rug. I didn't know about this. I don't think I've known about this. It seems news to you, Elga. Well, my mother couldn't possibly be under there. And if she is, I'm worried this will cause me lifelong trauma if I do something.
Starting point is 01:15:24 Anyways, should we open the door? Let's open her up. Yeah, let's open it. You open up the trap door, and the chamber it leads to is quite cramped. It's only big enough to hold a small chest that's sitting inside of it. Can we look in the chest or see if it's open? Or check it for traps first. What are you doing?
Starting point is 01:15:41 A lot of suggestions here. Can I check it for traps? Go for it, yeah. Yeah, make a investigation check. Five. It looks good to me. Yeah, no traps. Could I check it for traps?
Starting point is 01:15:51 Sure. Matty takes one large step back. With advantage, right? Because I'm close up? Yes. She says as she rolls a one. Gosh, dang it. Seven still.
Starting point is 01:16:00 Yeah, no traps. Can I check it? I take a second step back. Go for it, Chip. Okay, what am I doing? Investigation. Investigation. All right.
Starting point is 01:16:08 16. Yeah, no traps. No traps. Okay, well, looks like I'll put this down here. Didn't think it was that valuable. Maybe they just are, you know, being silly like keeping the front door of your house unlocked. Everyone's very trusting around here. Let's open it.
Starting point is 01:16:25 You open up the chest and inside is a picture of a young girl with dark features and black hair. Is it Avena? You take a look and it does not look to be Avena to you. You don't know who this is. Is it my mother? Describe the person. It's a picture of a young girl with dark features and black hair. Do I
Starting point is 01:16:41 recognize the picture? It's a young girl so it's hard to say. It doesn't look like anyone you know. Just to clarify, just so I know, maybe the audience wants to know this too. Has Elga ever seen her mother? Or like when was the last time she saw her? I mean, I think she would have been probably like seven,
Starting point is 01:17:00 like in actual years. So it's been a long time. Because Elga's like, what'd you say, like 300 years old or something? Who knows? I think you said something like 180 actual years. So it's been a long time. Because Elga's like, what'd you say, like 300 years old or something? Who knows? I think you said something like 180 to 300. Somewhere between there. It was a huge number.
Starting point is 01:17:12 So it's been a couple of years. Yeah. Make me a wisdom check with Advantage Elga. I'm so not wise. But you have advantage. Not going to help me nine. You don't recognize it. Okay.
Starting point is 01:17:26 Do I recognize it? Does Chip recognize a girl? Do I remember anything about what my mother did look like? Because I feel like if you're seven, you would. Yeah, you have some memories, but, you know, it's fuzzy. Did she have dark hair? Yes. Okay.
Starting point is 01:17:40 Does the person look like Elga to the rest of us, outsider's perspective? No. No, it doesn't look like Elga to the rest of us, outsider's perspective? No. No, it doesn't look like her. Is there anything? But it's hard to say, you know. It's an old photo. And if she's a young, you said it's a young girl, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:54 With dark hair. The only thing that's in the chest? Yes. It's just the photo? Yes. Is it Francesca? No. Is there anything on the back?
Starting point is 01:18:03 You flip over the photo and, you know, take a look at the back and you don't see anything on there. Okay. Is there anything else in this little, like, nook that we just opened? No, it was so cramped. This chest was all that could really fit in there. Do you think we should take this photo? Yeah, why not? What if it's that, uh, what's that story about the guy that has the Dorian Gray?
Starting point is 01:18:22 Yeah. Huh? Huh? I don't know who that is. Who's that? I don't think it's Dorian Gray. Yeah. Huh? Huh? I don't know who that is. Who's that? I don't think it's Dorian Gray. Okay, okay. Maybe it is. Basically a person that couldn't age or like whatever because they had a painting of him and the painting aged in their stead or something.
Starting point is 01:18:34 I can't remember the story. Yeah, but I mean that means that the painting would look like poop and this is a nice painting. It's a picture. And it's its own picture, right? It's not like part of a picture? Correct. Okay. Well, I guess I should maybe take it. Why not? I mean, it is in my house, which means it's a picture. And it's its own picture, right? It's not like part of a picture? Correct. Okay. Well, I guess I should maybe take it. Why not? I mean, it is in my house, which means it's my property.
Starting point is 01:18:49 Right. The chest, is it just a regular ordinary chest? There's anything ordinary about it? It seems to be a very plain wooden chest. Why would you block away a picture unless you're trying to hide something? Okay. Well, we take it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:02 And close up the chest. One more room. And I guess let's, yeah. Do you want to look around this library type room? We did. And there's nothing? Yeah. Okay. Oh, right, nothing got settled. Because we did our little checks. Okay. Alright, so you head to Count Von Brath's room? Yes. You head across
Starting point is 01:19:18 the parlor to the north over to Count Von Brath's room. Oh, before we do that, was Countess Von Brath's room also, like, disturbed as if people were looking around? No. And Barney even investigated, and it seemed undisturbed. Interesting. Okay.
Starting point is 01:19:33 I kicked the chair over so it looks the rest of the way. Everything's a kick with Mateed. Yeah. Wait, you can touch things with something else? I like the idea that their hands are just always in their pocket. Remember when you realized Matit had arms? Yep. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:47 He's playing a lot of Breath of the Wild. Cool. So across the parlor is Count Von Broth's room. You open the door, and this room is in disarray and is decorated with trophy after trophy of beast and humanoid heads mounted on the wall. Cool. There's a shelf with an assortment of goblets,
Starting point is 01:20:02 chalices, steins, and other stemware. And most curiously, there is a bloodstone font, but it is empty of liquid. Von Broth, your papa's a bit of a hunter, huh? Yeah. Sierra gonna, like, have trouble sleeping with, like, 80 heads staring at him? I like his style. I think that'd provide comfort for him, maybe. Are there any Aarakocarans or tieflings up there?
Starting point is 01:20:24 No. Okay. Sierra, does it look like this room's been, like... I think he said, yeah, it looks like it's been turned over. Vote for him. Maybe. Are there any Aarakocrans or tieflings up there? No. Okay. Does it look like this room's been like... I think he said, yeah, it looks like it's been turned over. It's been turned over. Yes. What else could we gather from here? Like, does anything look out of...
Starting point is 01:20:34 Other than it being a mess, does anything look like it's been taken or... Make a investigation check. With a vanish? Sure. With a vanish. Oh my God, dude. You got bad rolls? A nine. Let's get your rolls. Yeah, I rolled a one and a nine. I don't know. Oh, my God. You got bad rolls? A nine.
Starting point is 01:20:46 Yeah, I rolled a one and a nine. I don't know what's at my dice. Yeah, it seems nothing stands out. Are there any weapons or something? I'm assuming they're like a hunter. His mouth. This seems to me mainly be more almost like a trophy room. There aren't any weapons that you can see.
Starting point is 01:21:02 Is there a bed? Yeah, is there a bed? Coffin? I look up at the ceiling. You look up, there's nothing on the ceiling. And no, there's no bed or coffin. Closet? No. Does it also look like there might have been any sign of struggling? You know, things are
Starting point is 01:21:14 turned over like every other room. Like it's kind of in disarray, but not necessarily any signs of a struggle. Okay. If I had to guess, maybe the person was looking for that picture. For some reason. Why wouldn't they go into one room? Well, it was underneath the carpet. To guess. Maybe the person was looking for that picture for some reason. It's very possible. But why wouldn't they go into one room?
Starting point is 01:21:27 Well, it was underneath the carpet. But they didn't even look in that room. Yeah. It's true. Unless they lived here and they knew that it wasn't in there or something. I don't know. Well, it wasn't me. What is up with this house?
Starting point is 01:21:39 Is this a haunted house? Yes, thank you. Perhaps now is the time when we should go quickly that's good idea that's a good idea can I go back out into the foyer and ring that ivory ivory pretty sure is the red one yeah you pull the ivory chain okay do I hear quickly coming down the hall distant running running into a room. Apologizing profusely.
Starting point is 01:22:08 Everyone roll me a perception check. Those have been going so well. Oh my God, six. Five. Four. Eleven. Fifteen. So no, you don't hear necessarily any footsteps
Starting point is 01:22:19 or like the sounds of anyone approaching. However, Barney, you hear howling coming from somewhere down the hall in the vamp spire. It's howling, like, down the hallway that we just came through? Yes, but, like, not the direction you came from further down. Like werewolf howling or, like, howling like someone's in pain?
Starting point is 01:22:35 It's hard to tell. It kind of reverberates through the hallway. I don't know what that is, but we should probably go check that out. Yeah. There's not typically a lot of howling here. Is there a no howling ordinance in the Vamp Spire? In the Clostrid?
Starting point is 01:22:46 The HOA. Past 10 o'clock PM, yes. Right, yeah. Barney, since you made the highest perception check, why don't you make me a survival check? Also, I mean 10 AM because we sleep during the day. Oh, yeah, yeah, right. 21.
Starting point is 01:22:57 Yeah, you were able to follow it. You know, something about it like strikes a chord with you and you track the origin. You know it's coming from behind a plain wooden door with a doorbell and you know that the howling's coming from the other side of it when you say doorbell do you mean like a ding ding ding dong or like a button there's a button you want the ring or you want to just go inside i wait we're all uh what do they call them not coughs colds battlers no no no we are what are those things called? What's cooler than being cold? Ice. Ice. I open the door. What are we?
Starting point is 01:23:30 You open the door and it appears to open to a vacant, unfurnished apartment. Nobody's in there. Close the door. Cold! Get me down! Well, this is where the howling was. A single room or like multiple rooms? Like a couple of small rooms. And it's unfurnished? Yes. When you say howling, did you mean like, oh, or like wind howling?
Starting point is 01:23:48 Not wind. A creature. Yes. Can I look and see if there's anything in this room that's not just fake? Yeah. Anything? Make me an investigation check. I have to look around.
Starting point is 01:24:01 Fifteen. Don't forget to look at the ceiling. You got really good rolls here, Barney. I'm lucky. You look around and there doesn't seem to be anything in the apartment. However, you do notice that there are claw marks on the outside of the door that you came in through.
Starting point is 01:24:15 On the outside or inside? Like in the hallway or like when you're in the apartment? On the side of the door facing the hallway. Oh, okay. So the one that we when we approached it. Correct. Which makes me think something is inside right now that clawed its way in.
Starting point is 01:24:32 Hey, do your sound. Nothing. Nothing. Figures. We're about to try. I realize we're recording an audio podcast. I was looking around, like up in the air. Josh just goes, do your sound. I'm like, wait, what am I doing? So we heard it was a howling coming from this room. Wait, doesn't Barney have a bear?
Starting point is 01:24:48 I forgot about the bear. What? Oh, I forgot I have a bear. Yeah. You forgot you had a bear, so you didn't bring it along. No, I didn't. I didn't. You know I would.
Starting point is 01:24:59 You have to remember. Make me three animal handling checks. I got that soap stuff. Oh. The blue topaz or orange top handling checks. I got that soap stuff. Oh. The blue topaz or orange topaz stuff. I got that soapy soap. All right. Yeah, you have a bear with you.
Starting point is 01:25:11 Oh, my God, there's a bear. Do you smell it? It's where your family ran away. I should have shut up. I'm sorry. I just remembered. It has nothing to do with what's going on right now. I just remembered. It has nothing to do with what's going on right now. I just remembered.
Starting point is 01:25:27 The bear puts its nose on the button for the doorbell and takes like a big sniff from it. I push the doorbell. You hear like a deep bell ring. Oh, it's a deep bell. Maybe, but nothing seems to happen. I push it again. You push it again, and the door spins around,
Starting point is 01:25:43 revealing a dark, cramped stone room with an angry young girl blindfolded and chained up. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my goodness. Look what I did. Do I recognize that as Avena? No, it is not Avena. Is it the little person in the... It's a young human girl with olive complexion, brunette hair.
Starting point is 01:26:00 You can't see her eyes because she's blindfolded. Do I recognize her? She's covered in scars and clothed in blood-stained rags. You do not recognize her. It's the one from the painting that we found, or the picture that we found. It does not look like that. All right. I'm going to assist the little person.
Starting point is 01:26:15 Yeah, I'm going to help him up. Well, is there anyone, or is there anything else around her? Or is it just the girl? It's just like a small cramped room. Yeah, she was out there. So then I understand what happened. Was it that the second ringing of the bell like revealed a secret room? Correct.
Starting point is 01:26:30 Thank you. Okay, I'm going to help her. Yeah, she kind of hears you approaching. She can't see because, you know, the blindfold. She begins like growling and like trying to lash out as much as she can in your direction. Hey, oh, it's okay. I'm here to help you. You seem like you're in a little bit of trouble there. Are you okay?
Starting point is 01:26:46 She doesn't reply. She's still very restricted in her movement and blindfolded. Okay, I'm gonna pull off the blindfold. You see now that she has hazel eyes and full eyebrows. Who are you? Hey there, I'm Chipainy. Pleasure to meet you. I feel like I set that up
Starting point is 01:27:02 for you. You sure did. You said the secret sentence. What's going on here? Are you, have you been kidnapped? What's going on? No, I'm here of my own free will. Listen, I can't ask you this question. Oh, she's a good thing.
Starting point is 01:27:14 I love it here. This is so great. I put the blindfold back on. No, I'm just kidding. Uh, well, let's just. Help me, okay? Let me out of here right now. I think we should exercise caution right now.
Starting point is 01:27:26 Yeah, can I do like some sort of insight? Yeah, like some sort of vibe check. Vibe check, yeah. Insight check. Do you think she might be the one who clawed? I think so. She's very feral, spicy kid. Ah, yes. I see all. Well, one. Yeah, she's
Starting point is 01:27:41 doesn't seem to be concealing anything. Should I do an inspiration? You do you. You all will free me right now and take me back to my mother. Who's your mother? Lorenzo Wolfman. Ah! What? Why? Who took you and why?
Starting point is 01:28:07 Maybe we'll find out. No! Of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. Oh, no. Thanks for listening, everybody. This was a fun one. I'm loving the VAMP Spire. Me too.
Starting point is 01:28:17 It's twists and turns. It's a fun art. Intense. Yeah, I know. Families coming together. Breaking apart. Thanks for listening, everyone. We'll be back next week with another episode.
Starting point is 01:28:27 Bye. There are many ways little stinkers can support the show. Commenting on social media, rating us on podcast services, or interacting with us on Discord, or telling friends about the show by word of mouth. Stinkers like at Starman underscore Solar, at Cat Donut, at AlexArts16,
Starting point is 01:28:43 at Finn Cougar, and at BigMooseMike. Listeners that interact with us on social media and Discord also had NPCs named after them in this episode. The Quiffly, Elgus Battler, named by at AriTheAce, voiced by Ben Ernst, at Halcyon underscore Ben. Countess Vicksoft, named by at Vicksy Softpaws, voiced by Ash Schmidt, at FafNYRD.
Starting point is 01:29:03 And additionally, Marnie Farney is voiced by Caroline Grossman at Caroline underscore Constnar. And Benicia Wolfman voiced by Griff Milton at the underscore Indoor Kid. The Stinky Dragon Challenge is managed by Ben Ernst. This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon was produced by Kai Cook. Written, edited, and composed by Micah Reisinger with
Starting point is 01:29:19 additional editing work by David Saunier. Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. That's a nat 20 again. Oh my God. Yeah. Ben asks, what are these misty mountain dice? Ha ha.
Starting point is 01:29:51 We need your money now more than ever. We're all laughing, but it's true. I'm going to need you to cry in Barney's voice so we can practice that, as Barbara pointed out. I will see what happens when I have him.

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