Taskmaster The Podcast - Ep 42. Mel Giedroyc – S4 Ep.4

Episode Date: July 22, 2021

This week Ed is joined by Taskmaster royalty – Mel Giedroyc! Ed & Mel discuss prize tasks, the lime shoe, what she did with the wax seals and how Desky Dennis helped her plan a cycle ride. As we...ll as this they dig deep in to Series 4 Episode 4, enjoy!  Get tickets to Ed's Touredgamble.co.uk Pre order Bring me the head of the Taskmaster https://taskmasterstore.com/products/bring-me-the-head-of-the-taskmaster Watch all of the Taskmaster on All 4https://www.channel4.com/programmes/taskmaster Get in touch with Ed and future guests:taskmasterpodcast@gmail.com  Visit the Taskmaster Youtube channelwww.youtube.com/taskmaster  For all your Taskmaster goodies visit www.taskmasterstore.com    Taskmaster the podcast is produced by Daisy Knight for AvalonTelevision Ltd Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:12 Product availability may vary by region. See app for details. Hello and welcome to the Taskmaster podcast. It's Ed Gamble here. I'm the host of the Taskmaster podcast. You know by now that what we do is we watch the television show Taskmaster and we chat about it in forensic detail, always with a special guest. At the moment, we are chatting about Series 4 of Taskmaster, which is all available on 4OD. So go on there, watch the episode we're about to talk about, and then come back here and listen to us chat about it.
Starting point is 00:00:58 It's Series 4, Episode 4. It's a really good one. I mean, it's such a good series. I'm loving watching this one back. Some amazing contestants, some amazing tasks. And today today our special guest is one of those amazing contestants from this series it's the wonderful Mel Gedroych so happy that Mel was up for doing the podcast she is one of the most popular Taskmaster contestants of all time I'd say she's very funny she has many many memorable moments and I can't wait to chat to her about some of those and specifically some of those in this episode so go away watch it catch up watch along with us
Starting point is 00:01:31 and then come back and listen to this there's so much Taskmaster stuff to do out there there's a Taskmaster YouTube channel there's a Taskmaster store you can buy merch you can pre-order the new book there's so much going on always in the Taskmaster cinematic universe the TCU but for now let's listen to Mel Gedrich talking about series four episode four see you in a bit Ed hello welcome to the Taskmaster podcast isn't this exciting it's really good can I just ask have you got one of the Taskmaster trophies there in vision behind you not just one of the Taskmaster podcast. Isn't this exciting? It's really good. Can I just ask, have you got one of the Taskmaster trophies there in vision behind you? Not just one of the Taskmaster
Starting point is 00:02:09 trophies, my Taskmaster. Your Taskmaster. Can I ask you how that felt? Sorry to just. No, please. Turn the tables. How did it feel to win? I tell you what, it was an amazing feeling. I was very happy to have won, but also I felt kind of dirty for winning because it's so arbitrary. And then I was quite, during the last episode, I got quite het up and quite competitive and quite angry. And then I feel like in that situation, I don't believe you've ever been angry
Starting point is 00:02:41 or competitive, Mel, in your life. Am I wrong? A little bit competitive. A little bit competitive. Well, I was furious for the final episode. And when that pays off and you actually win, you can't help but feel a little bit sort of sordid. Did the others really turn against you?
Starting point is 00:03:01 Oh, yeah. Well, they turned against me from minute one. They could see who I was. Is it is it rubber is it rubber that trophy it's not it's not rubber it's sort of i'd say cheap plaster or plastic it's fairly hollow so good yeah it is good though what's weird though is it doesn't really look like him it's really odd does it no it really it's just it's no it i think people have compared it to Lenin in the past. It looks like a death mask, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. It's the way that, it's the way that
Starting point is 00:03:30 sort of the head is tilted back. Yeah. It's slightly unfortunate. And they've made no effort to redesign it since everyone's been making fun of it, not looking like him at all. So they've just stuck with that. Oh, well done you though.
Starting point is 00:03:42 I sort of felt, yeah, no no listen I I had a fairly clear idea that I wasn't going to win from fairly early on um but still I was a bit I would have liked to have won I think yeah but I think I you know as we all know it's not it's it's mainly not about the winning in Taskmaster and I think you uh you left your you left your mark on Taskmaster history. I think you're an amazing contestant, very popular contestant, I'd say as well. It was so much fun. Do you know what's still slightly rankles?
Starting point is 00:04:13 Can I get this off my chest, please? Go for it. I'm sorry. No, please. That's what you're here for. Okay. Thanks a lot. So one of the tasks was to collect some celebrity autographs on exotic vegetables. exotic vegetables yes i believe
Starting point is 00:04:27 the first but the first prize task of this series thank you exactly now i got every single member of take that on a different exotic vegetable apart from apart from dear jason who has gone off to do his own thing no one quite knows where he is he was spotted in carlisle but we don't know if we can believe that. Whatever. He was also spotted in Guatemala with a rucksack, but that's a whole other story. Okay, this is a global, enormous rock band.
Starting point is 00:04:56 I got each member. How difficult was it to get Robbie's? Can you imagine how difficult was it to get Robbie's? That was the reunion that everyone was looking for at the time, right? The exotic vegetable reunion. Yeah. Exactly. And then Noel Fielding, much as I love him, of course I love him,
Starting point is 00:05:14 got one semi-celebrity David Suchet, Poirot, on a broad bean, Ed. On one broad bean. That was one blooming signature of a... Yeah, okay. I mean, David Suchet is... He's a very important actor in the canon. This is good because I understand your point, Mel, but there's no point putting the boot into Suchet here.
Starting point is 00:05:33 You know, Suchet is not a semi-celebrity. He's a full celeb. He's a full celeb. He's Poirot. The guy's a legend. But he's not Take That, mate. He's not Take That. No, I see your point.
Starting point is 00:05:43 And I got four disparate members of Take That. You know, the atmosphere in Take That is not easy. We all know that. And I managed to glean four of them. That still rankles. I couldn't believe I didn't win that. So were they disparate when you got the signatures then? This wasn't them doing...
Starting point is 00:06:02 They weren't doing a show that you were doing as well and they were all together? Yeah were ed you've absolutely you've absolutely nailed it totally but you know i had to go to robbie's people and then i had to go to gary's people they're not the same people yeah you know howard and mark obviously good as gold lovely just that wasn't a problem they brought their own but gaza and robbie that was like the yalta blooming summit post-war you know to get that to happen i had to use all of my diplomatic you know forces and so it wasn't a case it wasn't a case of they were all hanging out in the same room they weren't in the green room and you walked in with a bag of veg and said come on lads all sign these wasn't as simple i had to talk to
Starting point is 00:06:48 gary's pa the day before to make sure that that was okay and to make sure that he was okay with a sweet potato yeah and then robbie i can't even remember that was just a whirl of sort of you know entourage and security and walkie-talkies it was not easy for me ed and then blooming fielding was working with sushi at the time they were thick they were thick as thieves those two yeah they were working on a film together all he had to do was knock on his winnebago door and say david can you sign the broad beans simple as that david doesn't even need to open the door fully like no one could have just posted it under the door and said can you sign the broad beans? Simple as that. David doesn't even need to open the door fully. Like, Noel could have just posted it under the door and said, can you sign this?
Starting point is 00:07:27 They probably had Jack and Jill interconnecting doors. Ed, honestly, I'm sorry to, I'm sorry. I'm sorry to get this off my chest. It's deeply, deeply narcissistic of me. No, this is good. And petty, and petty, and pedantic. I can't let it go mate that's what this podcast is all about it's all about the petty it's all about the pedantic and
Starting point is 00:07:50 it is having said that you're not competitive it's clear that you absolutely are you're just very good at disguising it when you're on television over that one thing i was so excited about that task i was so you know how some of the tasks just kind of make you kind of go like that because you know that you've nailed it do you know that thing some of them make you feel a bit kind of like oh no no don't show this yeah do you know don't show this exactly or oh god I was really mediocre in that um but there are some that you just feel, yeah, come on, man. This is a show in. This is a show in. Sushi.
Starting point is 00:08:28 I mean, sushi. Sushi on a broad bean. Sushi on a broad bean. I can see the attraction from Greg was the fact it could be described in three words. And those three words are sushi on a broad bean, which is not a sentence anyone's ever heard before. But I know, I realize all that. Which is not a sentence anyone's ever heard before. But I know, I realise all that.
Starting point is 00:08:48 But then I put this to you, is abroad being an exotic vegetable? Why not my aunt's got them on her allotment? No, I went for heritage, nobbly, expensive. I put some money into it as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh man, that for me is never, that's never going to sit right. That, for me, is never... That's never going to sit right.
Starting point is 00:09:06 You went above and beyond, and you weren't recognised for it. I completely agree there, Mel. Thanks, I feel better now. Now I feel silly. I feel silly now, but I feel better. There's a few things that we should get out of the way quickly at the top, Mel, before we dive headlong into the episode. Yes, yes.
Starting point is 00:09:27 Some things that we've been chatting about on this podcast. Firstly, we've become obsessed with the fact that on the first episode in the live studio task, you put on the shoe to squeeze the limes. Oh, that was a great moment. And you're wearing that shoe for the next two episodes which I hadn't noticed until someone on Twitter pointed it out to me yeah a big decision from you yeah I understood it for episode two because obviously you filmed two in a day so it was just a case of leaving the shoe on but then you must have gone away for the evening come back the next day and first things
Starting point is 00:10:04 first pop the lime shoe back on. I hid the lime shoe in my dressing room because I just thought, oh, this is going to be so banterous if I can actually wear this shoe for every single episode. That was the thought, Ed. That was the hope. It sort of mysteriously disappeared between episodes three and four. I think there was some kind of stylist you know on the roam and i think maybe she'd been told by um you know hq look can you do that's just embarrassing now can you can you can you wrestle the lime show off melt wrestle the lime show oh great can i just say the moment the moment when i realized that that was going to work was it was
Starting point is 00:10:43 absolutely sensational. I was so pleased with that because there was something about the purchase of that shoe, the heel of it, on the line, on the very edge of the stage. Oh, that felt good. Yeah, that is joyous. It was a total wild, you know, stab in the dark. I didn't know that it was going to work, but that was just very, very lucky one of those ones where you watch it you think well if when you see you do it you think well of course that's the only obvious choice but at the time people are picking grapes and hammers
Starting point is 00:11:13 they're picking tweezers things like that and then of course you put the shoe on you step on the line on the edge of the stage it's the only thing to do oh dear i did oh god those live tasks are good fun though aren't they they are yeah they're good really enjoyed though the adrenaline that kind of and of course having a live studio audience as we had you know back in the day a few years ago and we did the series that was i kind of feel for them now you know it's very must be very different the last couple of series that they've done because it makes a real difference doesn't it certainly for those studio tasks when there's people cheering and shouting and screaming and it feels like a proper sport doesn't it yeah yeah yeah definitely i say that as someone who's never really played
Starting point is 00:11:54 um team sports uh to any great level so so to actually have a a group of people cheering and shouting for you was quite a novelty for me it It's amazing. It's amazing. Yeah. So you sort of, with your fellow contestants, even though you are obviously competing against them, you do have a real sense of bonding. Did you have that, Ez? Yeah, definitely. We became quite good pals. We've got a WhatsApp group.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Yeah, same. We went for tea, you know. Yeah. I've got an idea. How about, because I think every series has got its own WhatsApp group. Right, yeah, yeah. yeah yeah in fact before Christmas we got quite competitive um because we noticed that David Baddiel's group with Joe Brand my group too that was yes so we we organized the tea and then Joe Lysett got very very jealous and that's right and. And you guys went for tea, right?
Starting point is 00:12:46 We went for dinner. Oh, you went for dinner. We went for afternoon tea. We're a bit more classy as a series. We went for dinner, but it was in the same place, wasn't it? Sketch, yeah. So that we could show all that we were there with the same pictures. I mean, that is ludicrous. But I was really keen to get our group,
Starting point is 00:13:07 in fact, I must WhatsApp everyone again, to go to Beckinscott Model Village, which is off the A40 near Beckinsfield. It's an absolutely brilliant day out. Yeah. And you go and you look at all these, you know, it's a model village with working trains and everything. And then you go and sit in a railway carriage
Starting point is 00:13:24 and have a picnic lunch. For some reason reason the gang weren't so keen on this but they went for joe's sort of very trendy central london you know cutting edge yeah with david shrigley paintings on the wall exactly yeah well i think i think that's worth another go how does this sound well let's try and get as many X-Taskmaster contestants together as possible and we all go to the model village and have a picnic. Listen, let's get all the WhatsApp groups together. I'm sure there's some clever way of doing that technologically. I mean, there must be, what, 80 of us now or something?
Starting point is 00:13:59 Yeah, well, it's... No, 50. Yeah, 55. 55. Right. We get the 55 together. This is what's going to happen. The only thing is the railway carriage only seats about 20.
Starting point is 00:14:10 So we'll have to have some inside and some outside. That's fine. We can do it based on ratings. Yeah. Very good. Very, very good. Ratings and winners of each series. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:20 The Channel 4 lot are going to be in the carriage, aren't they? Yeah. All the Dave. All the Dave the day yeah in the rain yeah well we have we have an email address here that we get people to send questions into oh yeah and i think let's, let's do this now, because I think we had about 1,000 and... between 1,000 and 5,000 emails about the wax seals. Another Easter egg, like the lime shoe that you decided to implant in the series.
Starting point is 00:14:59 Yeah. Just little seeds that you sewed there, without ever having to explain them. And you just kept the wax seals from all all of the tasks yes I had um a zip up pocket on the right uh the right hand side not stage right obviously oh no is it stage right I don't know camera right whatever anyway one of the zip up pockets and it would give me great pleasure just to go open the zip pop the seal in and um yeah a lot of people have asked me this actually and um i can reveal that so what happened was i kept them for ages and ages yeah
Starting point is 00:15:35 i was i was thinking oh what am i going to do this shall i melt them all down and then make some sort of giant seal and i'm not very i'm not very artistic and you know Noel would be amazing at that yeah of course yeah he'd create some sort of extraordinary you know stamp um I thought I'm not no I can't I can't really do that anyway I was working in the West End I was doing a musical and um the stage door lady um Tish as she was called as she is called tish um i love that name she said to me that her son is literally the biggest fan of taskmaster that has oh but but i mean literally he watches it every day reruns oh wow yeah yeah he's so massively into it and i just thought i've got to give them to him so i brought them along in an
Starting point is 00:16:25 envelope and I said to Tish please give these to your son he's probably you know the best person to have these so that's where they ended up basically oh wow that's lovely that's such a nice place I did keep one of them though I've got one of them on my desk yeah that's fair enough I think you're allowed to keep one yeah I think if Tish's son had kicked up a fuss about that it wouldn't be very gracious would it? I just like the idea of him being the custodian of them because he literally is the biggest fan
Starting point is 00:16:53 Oh that's lovely that's good people will be very happy to find out where they went and also that it's such a nice story as well Yeah good We had so many questions about that from paul in hampshire and then various other people asked about that uh it was a very popular question so i mean let's let's crack on with the with the episode i think let's let's talk about the
Starting point is 00:17:27 the prize task uh most surprising picture of yourself yes is the prize task which is uh it's a good one i think people really really leaned into it did you like doing the prize tasks now were you were you into them yeah i did actually i i can't um i'm trying to remember which other ones oh the chair i love bringing the chair and that's really good um yeah the picture of yourself um the most money did we have to bring in the most money was that one of ours yeah i think that was one of yours and then of course you know we've already discussed the the take that situation i don't want to i don't want to dig that up again, Mel. Let's not go back there, matey. Although I do feel, no, I feel cleansed.
Starting point is 00:18:08 I feel on now. I feel I can move on, actually. This one I really liked from you. You photoshopped into a Manet painting. Quite lazy. A bit lazy. Well, it's lazy in the sense that you came up with an idea and you just email you clearly emailed the idea over and went i'd like i'd like to do this but i like it i think it's it shows it shows invention and it was interesting and it was surprising greg tried
Starting point is 00:18:36 to claim that it wasn't surprising yes why i don't know i don't know i don't know why i think we just learned to expect the unexpected with you, Mel. So when something is unexpected, it's not that surprising anymore. No good. Yeah, no, I like that. I like that. I'll take that. I think that's the case.
Starting point is 00:18:51 No, I thought it was great. And I think it was Noel who said that you just looked like a pervert who'd popped into a painting. So have a look. Have a look at everyone. I sort of thought, listen, again, I'm starting to get gnarly i'm starting to get really petty go on i did slightly think that they might photoshop my face onto the nude lady right but in a way the result of just me in the boiler suit looking on was actually better so it was
Starting point is 00:19:20 better it was better so you're getting picky about the fact that they didn't do what you wanted them to do, even though you didn't tell them to do it. Never told them. Never even. I never expressed that wish to them, Ed, at all. Yeah, it's sort of retro, retro petanus. Yeah, I mean, they're an amazing production crew, of course, but they are yet to be able to read people's minds.
Starting point is 00:19:44 I've never come across such a nice chilled out bunch of people yeah i mean the stuff that you throw at them yeah isn't it literally yeah when you arrive in that comedy little um sort of it's like a little pavilion isn't it like a little cottagey pavilion oh good memories good memories. Good memes. Really good memories. What a nice time. Really good memes, yeah. Joe's excellent. I remember Joe putting this on social media. That was the only thing that took the surprise out of it for me was because
Starting point is 00:20:13 him and Lolly brought in things that I'd seen before. So Joe's was topless in a hammock with his back fat pressing through the hammock strings forming a checkboard pattern. Like a ham. I think Greg said that, didn't he? It was so satisfying yeah really satisfying yeah i'd not until i saw the picture i'd not seen anything like that before oh it was brilliant and you wanted to sort of you know um brush on some oil and and just do you know what i mean and put them in a little oven
Starting point is 00:20:42 it was oh gorgeous man i think that that might sum you up on Taskmaster is you were so enthusiastic about everything and always wanted to touch everything. So there was a moment, I think, in last week's episode where if you touch something that someone else had touched to get the egg into the cup, then you lose points. Oh, that was awful. And the first thing you did was
Starting point is 00:21:05 immediately touch everything because you got excited about touching all the things and you enjoyed that task so much i've completely forgotten about that oh god was that the horse was there a horse involved as well there was a horse that was one of the items oh i love that horse and you read out the task that yes you must get the egg into cup. If you touch the same thing as anyone else did, you lose a point. And the first thing you did was pick up the horse and say, why is this here? What a flipping idiot. Let's talk about Hugh Dennis, Desky Dennis.
Starting point is 00:21:38 Oh, Desky. Desky is such a good egg, isn't he? Such a good egg. A cracking good egg. not great at the prize tasks i'd say no um i think he's come bottom in all of them so far which is unfortunate because once greg gets into a rhythm that's the thing yeah once he starts enjoying putting someone bottom he will continue to do that and it does happen here yeah that's the thing that is the thing i mean which is hilarious yeah it just
Starting point is 00:22:06 becomes the best running joke ever but there were occasional times when i'd look over at desk and i think he looked a bit he looked a bit sad i think he was resigned to it by now yeah there's one later on where he definitely looks sad but the mask of himself which he wears to the shops so people don't think it's him i think quite inventive because he was the only one who brought a photo that wasn't presented on the screen it's the one he could hold over his face that's true actually that's very true but i am glad he got he came last again because it is really funny oh god he's a good man yeah i've always called um hugh desky because he revealed to me that that was one of his nicknames
Starting point is 00:22:46 at university because he was such a ruddy swat yes so Deskey Dennis now interestingly Mel I can I can pick that story apart slightly in that we had Hugh on the podcast last week oh yeah and he revealed uh to us that his nickname was Desk university oh it was desk he told you and sue and you immediately jumped on it and started calling him desky so you you've added the y there and quite rightly too it's way funnier to call him desky dennis desk dennis is horrible isn't it it's really that's bullying but desk sounds like bullying and definitely sounds fun yeah desk noel uh brought in a photo of him as the virgin mary with julian barrett as the baby jesus i would say mel this is lazier than yours now noel did a lot of good stuff with throughout the series amazing stuff
Starting point is 00:23:39 amazing this one is not it's not surprising because theosh did loads of weird stuff, didn't they? Yeah, yeah. Now, did we get awarded similar points for that? You got one more point than him. He got two points and you got three points. Okay, good. Yeah, I was going to say, I thought we'd been given equal points, in which case I'd have gone back into Sousche Broadbean territory.
Starting point is 00:24:01 It's not good. No, it's not good. I mean, it was a very good picture, though, wasn't it? It's a good picture, but he's not good no it's not good i mean it was a very good it was a very good picture though wasn't it it's a good picture it's a lovely picture he's not thought it through that but i think a surprising photo of noel would have been him in just like a t-shirt oh in really sort of normal clothes yes oh that would have been hilarious with a sort of really kind of really straight laced hairdo yeah yeah yeah exactly uh in a suit like a prop that would have been hilarious yeah at a desk at a desky at a desky
Starting point is 00:24:32 that would have been yes that's what we needed to see i wonder if such a photo exists it must do it must do probably maybe when he started doing comedy i'm sure he wasn't as jazzed about was he oh he was yeah yeah he looked amazing i seem to remember from the early days yeah he always looked pretty amazing i think you'd have to go fairly far back into the fielding um yeah into the fielding annals to get something really that would be hilarious or a little one of him in school uniform. Oh, yeah. Little baby Noel. Yeah, with a really sort of straight hairdo. That would be hilarious.
Starting point is 00:25:09 I bet he was still a goth when he was a little baby. Probably. I love the way in this episode four, we suddenly started referring to him as the crow. I think he did, didn't he? He mentioned it. He mentioned it. Yeah, then we all just jumped on.
Starting point is 00:25:26 Let's talk about lollies now, because this is the winning prize task. I remember this was on a TV show and it caused quite a fuss, I seem to remember. Lolly as Princess Diana, fully whited up. It's so funny. It's such a funny picture. Brilliant.
Starting point is 00:25:40 Because I don't sort of do social media, so I hadn't been aware of that so I was I mean I was yeah jaw-droppingly hilarious she's a cracker she's an absolute cracker yeah yeah yeah that I mean that was an easy winner for me I think yeah I agree the surprise it causes it makes people howl laughing that photo when they see it for the first time. Yeah, and the effort that obviously went into it to sort of create that look. Totally. Yeah, it's bold, isn't it? It's really bold.
Starting point is 00:26:08 Yeah, so that's five points for Lolly. Lols. Four points for Joe, for Joe's handbag. Yes. Three points for you, Mel. Two points for Noel. And of course, one point for the traditional place, for Desky Dennis.
Starting point is 00:26:22 Okay, we'll start with Joe then. What's your surprising picture? It's me in a hammock without a top on. And my back fat is pressed through the... LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I mean, do you have any more questions? I certainly do not. It surprised me and it horrified me.
Starting point is 00:26:55 It's a lovely start. Task one, make the highest splash. You have 15 minutes and one attempt. Also, before you commence the task, you must say who you think will win the task. Those who correctly guess the winner will win an extra five points. Your time starts when Alex blows his whistle. Good.
Starting point is 00:27:09 You were saying before you couldn't remember doing this task or you couldn't remember this task being in the show until you rewatched it recently. Yeah, it's one of those ones. They like to sort of lob in the sort of um the logic ones you know the sort of um the ones where you do actually have to really think yeah because i think with a lot of them you just go with your gut don't you totally yeah it's like your first reaction to it just do it yes i think that's always the best way of doing it as well yeah yeah we'll say if he doesn't really give much of a
Starting point is 00:27:44 pep talk or tell you how to do things because that would spoil it. But he normally says, go with your gut. If you think something, it's probably worth following. I found,
Starting point is 00:27:53 I don't know if you found this, Ed, but towards, I did all my tasks in six days. Yeah. I had a six day chunk before Christmas. Oh, really? So they weren't spread out at all you just did six days in a row wow okay that's really unusual i think it was just a
Starting point is 00:28:11 slightly bonkers yeah year for some reason and i just had six days to do all the tasks and i was doing about seven or eight tasks a day oh wow yeah um yeah i think that's right it was like 42 or something mad maybe it was seven days anyway so i really got into the whole i was in total task world which was actually which was actually quite good but towards the afternoon the blood sugar levels are low yeah of course and you just kind of want to get it over with. And I hate saying that because every task should be approached with 140% total commitment. But some of them I was just like, oh, let's just do this quickly. I completely agree with you. I think that's natural.
Starting point is 00:28:55 I think novelty wears off very quickly, doesn't it? And by the time you're in the afternoon, even if you are being asked to make the highest splash, whatever you're asking like oh come on come on really yeah yes but slightly i do remember a couple of them being a bit like that not with most of them but um and some of them i've literally just forgotten all about that's probably my age but um so with the highest splash i mean clearly the hose had to be involved i don't know what the guys were doing with buckets and balls well this is a classic example of you thinking outside the box i think mel because because they
Starting point is 00:29:30 were thinking a splash has to be an impact so they were looking forward to dropping something into something in a splash coming up whereas i think you correctly interpreted splash as as bouncing off something so you could just whip the hose towards the clock yeah the best way of doing it i think i did ask if i could climb on the roof of the house yes and was told pretty you know pretty sharpish no that that that wasn't going to happen because i've never let anyone do that only people ask every series can i get on the roof to do something and there's no way they're ever letting them do that no way i thought I could straddle the roof with the hose and then, you know, extend it as far as,
Starting point is 00:30:10 but I don't know how I would have done that. Well, Lolly was very good because she made the hose rigid. Yes, she did. That was very good. Although, as we know, it didn't quite work out the way she wanted to. See, I think I would have done something similar to Lolly, thinking that a splash is just some water going in the air so i would have thought if i could just fling some
Starting point is 00:30:30 water in the air then that would be a splash but i i wouldn't i would wouldn't have got the points i think i think it has to i mean i don't know i i just got lucky but i think it has to that impact is the sort of that's key yeah it's key key. It's all very well talking about it now with the glory of hindsight, but Splash Needs Impact, Ed, please remember that in future. Which is a shame. I think it's a shame you didn't get the full five
Starting point is 00:30:55 because Noel really lucked out. I mean, did he luck out? It was a good choice to do the bowling ball into the bucket. Yes. The big heavy thing into something that's only slightly bigger than it, I think, was very important here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And did Desky missing with the brick? the bucket yes the big heavy thing into something that's only slightly bigger than it i think was
Starting point is 00:31:05 was very important here yeah yeah yeah and did desky missing with the brick that was just bad luck oh but that's all we want to see really isn't it i i like seeing desky occasionally come good but most of the time i want to see desky fail especially as he approached it in such a methodical way he had a system he was almost doing it quite scientifically with the plumb line and then he dropped the brick and it completely missed the bucket yes it was amazing it was actually amazing oh it's a really it's a really rough episode for Hugh it is a really rough episode I feel for Desky man oh so it was it was five points for Noel yeah the bowling ball four points for you with the clock
Starting point is 00:31:45 splash yeah uh three points for joe who did he did a good job it was a solid effort it was just dropping something into something yes i think he soaked alex so that was uh yes that was excellent wasn't it i did yes yes that was very very good um and dear lols i think oh that was that was harsh but possibly it was it was i think right i think you've got to define splash correctly yeah i would have done the same thing i'm not saying she uh messed up because uh because i would have done exactly the same thing would you at one point yeah i think i think i would have flung it in the air maybe got a jug and tried to throw the whole thing into the air i'm very destructive the. The way I approached Tarse was quite destructive. If I could mess something up, then normally
Starting point is 00:32:26 I would. That was sad, wasn't it? When they said, who's your best friend? And I went, now. And they went, who's your best friend? And she went, not Noel. He often wears things like feathers. And in my mind's eye, I saw a big
Starting point is 00:32:44 old splash and a sort of drowned, feathery... Crow. And that worried me. I tell you it won't be. That swat who dresses like a crow. It's hockey season, and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything.
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Starting point is 00:33:58 Task two, here we go. This, straight off the top, I'm going to say is a vintage task. This is one i was really looking forward to talking about um choreograph a dance for you and alex to perform to any of the following ringtones apex by the seaside night owl playtime radiate censure circuit crystals uplift marimba strom and xylophone you have 30 minutes to prepare most stylish dance wins your time starts now now i wouldn't have listed all of those then apart from the fact that um it's so funny mel that your whole dance is based around the fact that you're dancing to censure but you're you'd read the cd wrong and it was actually radiate
Starting point is 00:34:36 what's it called radiate radiate yeah radiate i, for Pete's sake, what the hell happened there? I was so excited by censure and the whole concept of censure. Yeah. And to my mind, the music did sound more like censure than Radiate, didn't it? Oh, sure. Look, I completely agree with you. Oh, dear. So you got the wrong song.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Yes. Then it's the fact it starts with what is censure? Is this censure? Right, so you've asked the question at which point we all know no it isn't and i thought well that's fine because she could just say in the studio no it's not censure that's the answer to the question but then it ends with yes this is censure it wasn't censure but a brilliant dance a truly brilliant dance i loved it i what i felt with that dance was i wanted to bring the most out of alex as possible well because there's he's a he's a very you know he's a he's a sensitive soul and i wanted to see some good floor work and some proper, you know, as I believe censure, you know, that music was fit.
Starting point is 00:35:50 I don't think it was Radiator. I think it was censure. Ah, right. Okay. Well, yeah, they got it wrong. Let's just say they got it wrong. It's the production's fault again. But yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:35:58 Production got it wrong. Well, you brought a lot out of Alex, maybe slightly more. Oh, that was hilarious. The butt crack at the end. Oh, so good. The butt crack is so funny. I mean, little did he know at the time, I think that might be the first time we've seen Alex's butt crack in Taskmaster.
Starting point is 00:36:16 Little did he know further down the line, when Rod Gilbert gets involved in Series 7 and Lisa Tarbuck in Series 6, we see a lot more of Alex's bum. We see some pretty much full-on bum. There's the whole bikini thing, wasn't there? Was that with Rod? Yeah, Rod put him in a bikini. Rod turned his bum into a water feature.
Starting point is 00:36:36 Wow. And Lisa Tarbuck made him sit bare-bottomed on a cake. So, you know, this almost felt like of victorian times where you're watching it going oh we can see a little bit of alex's yes what i enjoyed about it though was the fact that he was wearing a suit yeah he was in a full suit and then you saw and then you saw the the reveal of the bum crack that felt very satisfying for some reason a little bum poking out the suit i agree because we used to build as bums we used to people wearing more casual clothing low slung jeans you know whatever it is shorts it's the fact that it came out of a suit it was very very really nice i think you've absolutely
Starting point is 00:37:16 nailed why that was so funny there that's great um it was a great it was a truly great dance i love that it started with the silent intro on the knees it had a sort of torval and dean feel to it like a modern modern torval and dean bolero yeah bolero thank you for i was trying to channel thank you very much torval and dean also a bit of cake bush yes great with those with those floor sweeping moves that was that was the thought behind that yeah and he's very good at learning stuff al you know because in the series we had to do the complicated handshakes he He nailed that in seconds. He's obviously just got one of those brains that sort of retains all that crazy information.
Starting point is 00:37:52 He was really good, actually. He was brilliant. He's a smart guy. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Now, Noel actually used censure and pretended to be a shrew. That was good.
Starting point is 00:38:04 I enjoyed that. I had some odd backgrounds, which he blamed production for. The shrew in Covent Garden. Yeah, the shrew in Covent Garden. Look, this was good. Don't get me wrong. I think it was good.
Starting point is 00:38:15 But, and you're going to like this point, Mel, I don't think it deserved to be in joint first with you. Well, that's contentious. It is contentious. It is contentious. You you had way more you'd employed way more moves uh it was more dynamic knolls was mainly the one sort of move he just decided on the shrew situation and just did it i i'd imagine they spent less time practicing that one i wonder i wonder but they did sort of wow the wow factor with the different backgrounds was quite good. Yes, but as Noel said, he didn't do the different backgrounds. So the dance itself.
Starting point is 00:38:51 And I think what got him the five points was possibly the explanation of the shrew. The shrew. Yes, that was very strong. I think that charmed Greg. It was very strong. I mean, they look jolly. I like the way that a lot of it was done to camera. Maybe ours was a bit internal.
Starting point is 00:39:05 It was a bit intense. It was very intense. was very intense but dance is intense the center is intense and that's what you have to you know you have to yeah absolutely read it uh um lolly's dance uh we've already mentioned it friendship is truth uh got got three points i i think this deserved more i would have given this four points yeah it had a story it had a conclusion it had a fake out it had a little deliberate blooper no other dance had that yes that was really clever and also extremely well acted yeah i seem to remember when i first saw that i thought oh god oh dear alex oh that was a bit you know very very good she's a very good actress yeah she is very very strong indeed yeah i. Oh, that was a bit, you know, very, very good. She's a very good actress.
Starting point is 00:39:45 Yeah, she is. Very, very strong indeed. Yeah, I think for me that was four points just because it was so different to the others. Yeah. Joe. I mean, we've got to, we'll finish on Desky, of course. Of course we will.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Let's quickly talk about Joe's. I loved that it was on a runway. I loved that the plane took off at the end. I thought there was some really clever moves in there. Yeah, that was really good. And I liked way that al wore joe's jacket yes i found that just really the nice little touch i like that very much yeah what actually what while we're here let's talk about this this feels because normally i do emails at the end but i think yes they so easily fold into what we're talking about now we've obviously had emails about this and i've
Starting point is 00:40:24 always wondered about this and I've always wondered about this and we've never got a good answer from Alex. He always wears a different tie when you're doing your tasks. Does he? So when you're doing your tasks, Alex wears a tie. He wears a bow tie for one of them in this episode.
Starting point is 00:40:39 Yes, yes he does. He did. Later on he wears a red tie. He's always got a tie on for a start. He doesn't wear a tie for anyone else in Taskmaster history. And for you, he changed the tie, I'd say, every day at least, or every task. So for us bunch or just for me?
Starting point is 00:40:58 No, just you. I didn't even notice that. And whenever he's asked about it, why did you wear a tie for Mel and no one else? said because it's mel gedroych wow do you know i didn't even notice that amazing i assumed i assumed that you'd notice that oh that's really sweet what an honor that's really lovely is that true yeah that's true he's always wearing a tie not not for anyone else that's really lovely it just shows what you notice though doesn't it in that situation because the fact you wore a
Starting point is 00:41:30 bow tie for one of them maybe it maybe it was the fact that you filmed them all in a row so you sort of had the opportunity to just really change it up every day yeah i can't i can't remember that's a lot of ties though That's a lot of ties, though. It's a lot of ties. Yeah, that's like 40 ties. But yeah, there was definitely a lot of different ties for when you were doing your test, but it was never mentioned.
Starting point is 00:41:54 Oh, what a good man, honestly. Yeah, what a guy. Yeah. Now, from that lovely moving piece of news to the opposite, Desky's dance. Oh, Desky. I mean, it looks like amateur wrestling, doesn't it? way he lifts alex up and nearly drops him on his head then likewise i mean he was slightly more elegant when alex picked him up yes i think this is one of the times where hugh desky dennis
Starting point is 00:42:19 looks genuinely quite sad when greg describes it as horseshit yes that now that was very that was i think all of us reacted didn't we that was quite we were quite we were quite protective of desky at that okay now again mel you've you very much held people to the same high standards that you have what actually happened was because i specifically noticed this everyone else lost their minds laughing and you went oh no desky so it was you who was being protective of desky and everyone else left him left him out there in the wind is that right yeah everyone else was just laughing so much and you look you look horrified on his behalf but we would you know we were we were compadres yeah we were and actually all throughout the studio records which is four days isn't it you do two shows a day yeah for eight episodes i don't know if it is still eight episodes but certainly it's 10 now oh is it well
Starting point is 00:43:17 in the dave days yeah uh it was eight episodes so four yeah four days well i think you're actually are you the no there's one more series of eight episodes series five is eight episodes of four. Yeah. Four days. Well, I think you're actually, are you the, no, there's one more series of eight episodes. Series five is eight episodes and then six series six goes to 10 episodes. And that was on Dave. Okay, cool. Um, all throughout those studio days. I mean, I, you know, I've known Desky for years, um, you know, just through work and, you know, coming across each other, but we'd spent so much time with each other. And he was also helping me map a cycle ride that I was about to do with my eldest daughter
Starting point is 00:43:51 of the West Country, Bristol-de-Land's End. Oh, wow. So when we weren't recording, we were in his dressing room or my dressing room just plotting out this, because, you know, he's an absolute avid cyclist. You could tell from it, he's definitely got cyclist legs, hasn't tell from he's definitely got cyclist legs hasn't he he's got the cyclist legs and he's got sort of craft work levels of commitment to the bicycle yeah and um so yeah he was being so helpful i felt very
Starting point is 00:44:17 close to desky so that's why so that's good to have a bit of context there when you jump up to protect him when they call his dance horse shit, in the background you're thinking, well, I don't want to upset Desky because, you know, we've not made it to Land's End yet on the map. Yeah, exactly. We're still on Exmoor. There's a lot more work for Desky to do.
Starting point is 00:44:37 Let's keep him sweet, keep him on side. Yeah, but he got all the maps and everything. He brought all the maps in. It was so brilliant honestly he saved my bacon because i'm really crap at stuff like that and did it go well the cycle ride it was six days of them i mean it's i can't actually believe that we did it we did over 50 miles a day oh wow on crappy bikes going over blooming x more it was on but it was unbelievable yeah but yeah we did it we did it she she raised the money and everything i was i was foul tempered think of all the good
Starting point is 00:45:13 temper that you know was on taskmaster just flip that i was absolutely i was taken to the absolute ruddy brink love it and and it came to the point in the eden project where it was shitting down with rain and we kept going round and round because the signage was so bad the bike signage was so bad we were there for two hours stuck in the eden project i i literally threw my bike down and volleys of expletives just into the rain and my daughter actually turned to me she was then 15 and said mum stop being a dickhead and um and it actually really i thought god yeah i really am a dickhead so then we were fine after that it was good it was a it was a moment amazing yeah anyway well that's what happens if you get desky to map your bicycle ride. Yeah, cheers, Desk. Yeah. One point for that map.
Starting point is 00:46:06 And one point for his dance as well. Two points for Joe's, which I thought was harsh. I thought it was good. Can I just say, though, sorry. You know, dance is very hard anyway. Full respect to people that do it. But actually, lifts are really, really hard. Well, as he proved.
Starting point is 00:46:23 But you see, I think he should have got more points for that then probably for attempting the left for attempting none of us none of us did nobody else did i mean joe and alex did that sort of um you know foot meet that slightly yeah i loved that i thought that was really good i did yeah they hooked they hooked their feet around each other didn't they and sort of hopped around yeah um. You know, which was good. Good contact. Good contact. That's why I thought the two points was a bit harsh on Jo, really. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:49 Yeah. But then Lolly's, Lolly's was, I enjoyed Lolly's story, but I think she made sure she deserved more than three. And then you and Noel, obviously,
Starting point is 00:46:57 on the joint five points, very well deserved. We all have a laugh on this show and it's supposed to be a light-hearted thing, but I also know that when you put an effort into something, especially putting yourself out there creatively, that
Starting point is 00:47:13 one has to deal with it sensitively. However, on this occasion, horseshit. Task three. Create a portrait of a celebrity using loo roll. There is a camera horseshit task three create a portrait of a celebrity using loo roll
Starting point is 00:47:28 there is a camera above your head the mat beneath your feet is your canvas best portrait wins you have 20 minutes your time starts now a very heavy
Starting point is 00:47:36 art series this one a lot of art which really plays into Noel's hands absolutely he was so good he was so good because he sm good this again another art task for him to absolutely annihilate with his uh his self-portrait anolate anolate good didn't he
Starting point is 00:47:54 did you enjoy doing the art I mean look let's not be around the bush you didn't do great in this one no did you enjoy doing any of the art ones is that love them. I absolutely love them. I mean, I am absolutely shite at art. Anything that involves drawing, painting, sculpting, absolutely out of my comfort zone. But I just kind of thought, oh, come on, give it a whirl. Doesn't matter. You might just come up with something brilliant. It's a good attitude.
Starting point is 00:48:18 You know, so just had to sort of go for it, really. Where was that attitude at the Eden Project, Mel? Oh, man. I'm never going back there. I am never. I mean, full respect, I know that what it symbolises is absolutely wonderful and important, but, oh, my God, that was bleak.
Starting point is 00:48:38 There was no-one there. There was absolutely no-one there. The rain was so intense. Yeah, oh, boy. God almighty. was absolutely no one there the rain was so intense yeah oh boy god almighty with it was two literally two hours round and round and round the bloody signage i'm gonna write to them actually i'm gonna write to them absolutely five years later but it doesn't matter no this is this is i like that this what this podcast is uh providing for you yes is that you're realizing that even though it was five years ago you can still be angry about it absolutely um no self-portrait was incredible i mean you
Starting point is 00:49:09 know exactly who it was it is how did you do that he's so good at using different ways of doing things as well yeah there was a task i don't remember this where you had to uh where you had to do a portrait of someone um but they were behind a curtain. Yes. And Noel was the only one who did it on a chopping board and it just made it, it stood out. Yes, yes, he did. Yes, he did do it on a chopping board. And here he flipped some of the rolls. He didn't just use the paper.
Starting point is 00:49:35 He flipped the rolls up to be the eyes and it just gave it a bit of texture. Very clever. Yes, yes. It was, those eyes were quite boosh actually, weren't they? Yeah. Because they used those because they use those sort of polo mints yes do you remember those yeah for the hitcher yeah exactly that was
Starting point is 00:49:52 no that was brilliant that was really really strong um and very clever idea to pick himself as well yeah because he has a very striking silhouette uh and of course people are going to know who it is straight away so for joe i think joe had a clever choice of celebrity he picked pam st clement uh who plays yes that was good wasn't it he has a lot of defining aspects i would say yeah yeah yeah yeah presumably he did the earrings i don't remember yeah must have done big bog roll earrings yeah he also did a speech bubble saying, I'm Pam, which felt like cheating. Yes, he did. What did Lolly do? So Lolly did Harry Potter.
Starting point is 00:50:31 Oh, yes. So I would, straight away, I'd argue that Harry Potter is not a celebrity. Okay. Harry Potter's a character. I mean, I don't think that argument came up, but that's what I would say. And also, I mean, Greg really gave it the kiss to death by pointing out that it looked like Gandhi which is true
Starting point is 00:50:48 the lightning bolt on the head was doing a lot of the heavy lifting yeah yeah yeah but it was well done it was well done at no point Mel am I saying that it was worse than yours come on I don't know what mine had i seem to remember
Starting point is 00:51:06 i i made the face extremely small it was the eyes and the nose and the mouth were really sort of um very you know very close together and then it just became about the the huge beard the huge beard but it was very striking i thought the beard was very striking i thought it looked good initially when you saw it yeah the problem mel was that you said it was very striking. I thought the beard was very striking. I thought it looked good initially when you saw it. The problem, Mel, was that you said it was Chris Christopherson in the studio, but you said it was Barry Gibb at the time.
Starting point is 00:51:33 Yes. Yeah. I think, I think Al suggested that it might be Jesus or God. Yes. And maybe I should have just gone along with that. Did you start the face before you decided who you were doing? I don't even
Starting point is 00:51:45 remember i don't i i don't i just it was quite a short time for that task wasn't it uh yeah 20 20 minutes to decide how to do it yeah that's very short yeah i think maybe if i'd thought about it a bit more i might have gone in with it with something different but i just thought right come on start stripping yeah start start not stripping start um that would have been quite the way that would be outside the box for that task just let's have a look at what melded but again I'm sorry let's talk about Desky. Yeah. That was a good portrait. It was a good portrait of who? But not of the Queen.
Starting point is 00:52:28 Because it wasn't a good portrait of the Queen. To me, it looked a bit like Barney Rubble from the Flintstones. Yes, it had a Barney Rubble vibe. It was quite a delicate, very delicate featured portrait. Very delicate. It did. What did he get? was he on one point again no he got three points
Starting point is 00:52:47 oh he got three at this point I think some real Desky Dennis sympathy points kicked in there because Greg was ready to give that portrait five points
Starting point is 00:52:56 if it was if it looked like someone yeah because it was well done because it was well done yeah unfortunately Lolly and yourself both got one point.
Starting point is 00:53:07 And then Desky was on three. No, no. Pam's employment, four. And then, of course, five points. Straight into five points. An easy five points or no. Yeah, which was right, actually. That was absolutely right.
Starting point is 00:53:18 Yeah, I think so. Tough. Tough guess, this. John Lennon. Nope. Is it God? Nope. Do you want to try God's son, Jesus? Yeah. Nope.
Starting point is 00:53:33 It's... Can you remember? Chris Christopherson. No, no, no, it's Barry Gibb. It's Barry Gibb, you said. It's Barry Gibb. APPLAUSE Task four. Yes. There's a lot of episodes with four. There's a lot of episodes with four filmed tasks in the series, which is unusual now,
Starting point is 00:53:54 which is probably why you were doing seven or eight a day. Do the most incredible thing with this pommel horse. You have 10 minutes. Your time starts when you next blink. Now, this is, yeah, this is good. This is, I mean, we spoke to Hugh last week and he said this is his abiding memory of doing Taskmaster was just doing as many forward rolls as he could manage in 10 minutes.
Starting point is 00:54:14 And he had a lovely time. But what I loved about Desky, I'm trying to think of the character. I think it's Stanley Kowalski, actually. Stanley Kowalski in one of those um oh come on oh brain oh cat on a hot tin roof it's one of those classic 50s american plays isn't it where there's always you know the guy in the singlet right the sort of smoldering guy in the white vest that comes in probably sort of half drunk
Starting point is 00:54:46 and is some very, very... Streetcar Named Desire, is it? Is it one of those? Waterfront. Quiet Waterfront. Yeah, it's quite deep. On the waterfront. Brando.
Starting point is 00:54:57 Is it Brando vibes? Yeah, it's Brando. It's sort of mid-20th century America, you know, in crisis. And for me, that was Desky Dennis. Yeah. He suddenly whipped off the shirt and it was like, hello, sailor. This is very, very good.
Starting point is 00:55:18 This is very strong. Yeah, he was looking for an opportunity to get that shirt off. Yeah, very, very good. Very good. It's like those really sort of, I like those nonchalant athletes that don't have all the gizmos and all the sort of shiny jackets and lycra.
Starting point is 00:55:35 They're just there in jeans and a vest. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? It's like skiers who can go down a black run, you know, just wearing a skirt and a jumper but you know what i mean you just kind of that's just really cool it's really off you know just off the cuff and back foot um there's people in my gym sometimes who are just wearing jeans but i like that it's kind of i think they've i think they've had a bad day some of them
Starting point is 00:56:00 oh really there was a guy in a gym that i used to go to who always used to be on the running machine barefoot oh my god I thought that was quite cool just kind of quite normal clothes normal shorts, normal top and bare feet and I just thought that's not good for the Veruca spreading well it's only bad for the Veruca spreading if you then go on
Starting point is 00:56:22 in bare feet as well yes, with the Veruca spreading if you then go on in bare feet as well. Yes, with a Veruca. Yeah, with a bare feet. No, there was something very, very impressive about that. He got the five points, surely. He got joint first place with you, Mel. Oh, was he joint with me? Because, again, this is another one of you.
Starting point is 00:56:40 You didn't go with the gymnastics angle like you did. You went with the magician angle and you made the pommel horse disappear it was it was full copperfield yeah you used that tarpaulin yeah for the intro and you properly like you'd you'd thought about it it was a vegas show i got the feeling mel that you'd quite like to be a magician oh I was so invested in that task it was unbelievable I loved the choice of music that production put on afterwards yeah yeah one thing for that well done I absolutely love that it was it was one of those tasks where you just the idea just comes to you it just drops like a sort of newtonian apple in the garden and it just goes bunk and you go yeah i can do this it absolutely was it was vegas it was copperfield it was horse disappearing i just thought i can do this
Starting point is 00:57:39 i can do it was great and you deserve you deserve the five points for that. As did Hugh put in so much effort as well. Oh, God. Hugh just went on and on and on, didn't he? But also it's the fact that he was jumping over the horse to do the role. Yeah. I think, yeah. Trying to get onto his feet.
Starting point is 00:57:55 And he said that he tried to get them to do it, let him do it onto the concrete. But they wouldn't let him, of course. I mean, Alex rather bluntly says in the splashing task when Hugh said, but you wouldn't let me go higher because, and then Alex says, because you're 55. Yes. So it feels like they were protecting Hugh because of his advanced years.
Starting point is 00:58:19 He's super fit though. He's so fit. He really is. You know, that guy is, yeah, absolutely. Oh, very, very good. It was certainly more impressive than Lolly's gymnastic effort. It was very half-assed immediately. And she ended up rolling under the horse.
Starting point is 00:58:35 And we've all had those moments on Taskmaster where you just get to the end of the time. You don't know what you're going to do. And you end up having to roll under a horse. Yeah. Joe, again, showing his artistic flair here dressed the pommel horse as an actual horse which he called modern art and he gave a whole story about how he left a zimmer frame next to it that an old man had been riding the horse and he'd
Starting point is 00:58:55 got off forgotten his frame and then the old man had died yeah greg usually appreciates that sort of level of uh detail level of detail and And he did get three points along with Noel, who dressed as a Russian peasant lady and turned the pommel horse into Alex. Yes, you see, that was nice. That was nice. There was sort of magic there, wasn't there? An extra character.
Starting point is 00:59:22 Extra character, though. It was an extra character, but I preferred an extra character but i preferred the pump the pump of yours mel i i was quite pleased with the finish on mine which i i was wearing the the the cape the um tarpaulin cape tarpaulin or tarpaulin i don't know one of the tarpaulin tarpaulin cape and um i did i sort of didn't want the task to end. So I remember running into the house still with the cape on and feeling pretty pumped, actually, pretty pumped. There's also, of course, Hans Klock. Let's not forget him.
Starting point is 00:59:55 He was an incredible 80s German magician. I'm not sure if I'm aware of the work of Hans Klock. Oh, my days. I mean, he makes David Copperfield look a bit sort of, you know, a bit Paul Daniels, to be honest. He's really, I mean, amazing. Just check him out on YouTube. There's a few of them.
Starting point is 01:00:17 Oh, I will. Absolutely. Yeah, the 80s magicians. Very, very, very good. Hans Klopp. Yeah, no, he's excellent. If I'd known that, I would have made some sort of great pun uh about matt hands matt hands hands clock i would have done some great political skit about it yeah not such a good magician yeah of health um clumsy with his hands yes yeah i mean good but sadly i didn't know about hands clock at the time no he's very very good
Starting point is 01:00:43 he often used to do things, maybe it was to do with his surname, but on the clock, you know, so he'd have a minute countdown. It'd be this awful minute countdown before he had to get the lion out of the cage, you know, with the woman in the leotard. So the lion wouldn't be all the woman in the leotard. It was that kind of stuff.
Starting point is 01:01:01 It was real full-on adrenalized stuff. Massive hairdo. Bigger than Copperfield of stuff. Yeah. It was real, full-on adrenalised stuff. Massive hairdo. Bigger than Copperfields, actually. Wow. Bigger than Ruddy Copperfields. Sodding tight trousers. And so much pomp, you wouldn't believe it. So it was one point for Lolly,
Starting point is 01:01:17 three points for Noel and Jo, and five points for you and Hugh. Desi Dennis. Where did it go? Not going to say. Five points for you and Hugh, Destiny Donners. Aw. APPLAUSE Where did it go? Not the misset. That is some pretty Las Vegas shit. LAUGHTER
Starting point is 01:01:33 Using camera trickery, you managed to make a pommel horse disappear. Sorry, sorry, you said the words camera trickery? Yeah. Did you see the pommel horse after that? Did anyone see it? No, it had gone. Did you see it inommel horse after that? Did anyone see it? No, it'd gone. Did you see it in the house? I was there, so don't ask me I was there.
Starting point is 01:01:49 So I saw it being moved by the people. Awesome. You are out of the magic circle. The live task was make the highest tower using these tubes. You have 100 seconds. Yeah. Again, we've talked about live tasks. The adrenaline really pushing you through there. was make the highest tower using these tubes. You have 100 seconds. Again, we've talked about live tasks. The adrenaline really pushing you through there.
Starting point is 01:02:10 Do you have any particular memories of a favourite live task that you did in this series? Oh, I think it's got to be the lime shoe. That was hard to beat. There was quite a fun one where we were underneath sort of barber, you know, like you get at the barbos or the headdressers the uh the longest uh chain of balloons underneath underneath the smock yes the smock did you have a smock task as well we had no we had no smock tasks we had a lot of
Starting point is 01:02:36 blindfolded tasks and stuff but did you no smock business yeah yeah yeah i'd love to do it again wouldn't you you do do it again though don't you because yes we are doing we are doing champion of champions right so come on we've filmed the tasks for that already right so who is it it's you it's me richard herring lisa tarbuck uh kerry godleman and lou sanders oh that's going to be your your compadre lou sanders i love lou i absolutely love lou she's brilliant isn't she listen herring very competitive very but i think everyone is i think you need to lisa in a very laid-back way though i think she'll but she yeah she's stealth isn't she yeah i think she's really good yeah she's real stealth oh my god i can't
Starting point is 01:03:26 wait to see that that's going to be great that's going to be great is lou competitive yes i think she tries i think she tries to make out that she's not or yeah okay but no i think she really wanted to win her series uh and i think she'll i think she'll try and pretend that she's all chill and uh vibey and hippie about the whole thing but not that's interesting that's good Sanders there's steel Sanders steel and Kerry I don't know so well so um oh she's I think we're all competitive I think that's why it's probably good that it's one episode because I think it will probably get quite uh quite shouty oh my god I can't wait to see that that's going to be amazing that is going to be absolutely amazing um so it was three tubes high for you and Hugh, Mel and Hugh,
Starting point is 01:04:07 which always makes me laugh every time. When Alex said that the first time in your series, when he said something like, one of Britain's best loved double acts, Mel and Hugh, it's so funny. Just the exact sort of thing that tickles me. Three tubes high for Mel and Hugh, bagging the five points.
Starting point is 01:04:24 And Joe, Lolly and Noel, only two tubes high for Mel and Hugh, bagging the five points, and Joe, Lolly and Noel, only two tubes high, so it was three points for them. You win this episode, Mel. I can't believe it. Did I win more than one episode? You, Mel, actually won three episodes. You are kidding.
Starting point is 01:04:46 Three out of eight. You won episode two, you won this episode, and you won the final episode, Tony Three Pies. So why didn't I win for PC? Yeah, I mean, you should have done. I mean, Noel... Ergo, yeah, how many did he win? Two? One. Stop it. Right, I'm going to take this.
Starting point is 01:05:02 This, my friend, this goes to the higher cheeses yeah that's incredible i hadn't realized that yeah you won three episodes mel and came third in the series wow i think the issue might have been mel we talked about last week's episode last week of course and it was a very bad episode for you and uh it was only three points for you in the last episode so it's almost like you missed an episode no i i i i take that i absolutely take that yeah totally so don't maybe don't go to anyone's office to make some demands because i'd imagine they'll just bring up the
Starting point is 01:05:35 episode where you got three points yeah yeah no you're absolutely right i was imagining myself going in with some actual broad beans and then some actual exotic vegetables and plonking them on the table and saying look there are your broad beans there are your exotic but yeah so no i'm not going to do that actually i haven't got a leg to stand on oh dear dear dear but you won this episode let's let's not let's not uh we need to stop we need to revel in this enjoyment you've got 24 points. Noel got 23 points. You won this episode. You won all those photos.
Starting point is 01:06:07 It was 19 points for Joe, 17 points for Hugh, 15 points for Lolly. Noel is in the lead of the series. Joe is second. You are third. Hugh is next. And then Lolly is... Lolly's last. Yeah, Lolly's last.
Starting point is 01:06:22 Episode four, that is the rankings rankings how the series finishes which is quite interesting i was gonna say i don't think anyone overtook noel after that did they oh really oh that's interesting i don't i might well i might be wrong joe had quite a good run didn't he i seem to remember yeah joe's really solid he comes he comes up with some amazing stuff yeah yeah i can't remember if anyone actually overtook noel from this point forward it's amazing how seriously we take it isn't it yeah but that's the thing that's the joy of it that's the joy the joy of tm is you blooming you've got to invest you've got to believe you've got to believe and invest and totally just are immersed in the world i could
Starting point is 01:07:01 i could have lived in that house i could have lived in that house. I could have lived in that house, literally. I'd have liked to have lived in that house while I was doing the task to totally, you know, totally immerse in the vibe. Well, it sounds like you almost did, really. If you were there every day for about a week, you were basically, you may as well have slept there. Yeah, it was seriously full on, actually. I remember Al Murray kept coming by to visit as well.
Starting point is 01:07:24 This is such a because he popped up twice in the last episode did he used to pop in to say hello yes that man cannot let go he can't let go no I think he probably lives in the area he definitely does
Starting point is 01:07:41 he does but it was always really lovely really jolly to see him he came with his kids one day he came for a cup of tea i think it was when we were doing um there was one when we had to serve al his sandwiches and milk yes didn't we yeah i was i was somewhere behind the cameras for that munching on a sandwich it was very very good always a joy i love that every time there's a new little piece of information about how often Al Murray was at the house because I thought he just ended up to do a task now and again when people
Starting point is 01:08:12 asked him no no he just popped in for a cup of tea just came in yeah yeah I love that love that good so good we've done most of the emails i sort of folded them into the chat but we're just this this is not a question this is just a compliment mail from tony uh not so much a question but if you ever get melon i just want to say how warm and lovely she came across i'm sure all the contestants were fantastic lovely people but she just came across. I'm sure all the contestants were fantastic, lovely people, but she just came across as an extra nice person. Keep up the good work, Tony. Oh.
Starting point is 01:08:51 That's a nice email, isn't it? Thanks, Tony. That's really lovely. You should have seen me at the Eden Project, Tony. Then, honestly, oh, dear. Within a minute, Tony, you would have been calling her a dickhead. Oh, my God. I was.
Starting point is 01:09:07 I was an absolute dickhead. Oof, not good. Not good. Mel, thank you very much for coming on the podcast. We always get our podcast guests to rate their experience on the podcast between one and five points in the style of Taskmaster. Feel free to be honest with me. How have you enjoyed the podcast from one to five points? Seven.
Starting point is 01:09:23 Seven, yes. Two bonus points. Yeah, or even eight. I'll take it, I'll take it. And actually, because that piece of information about Al wearing the tie, I'm sorry, that takes it up to at least nine for me. That's great.
Starting point is 01:09:37 I find that really moving. That's really covered quite a lot of shortfall of the people who thought it was funny to give me one point. So that's bumped up the average somewhat, Mel. Thank you very much for that. And thank you very much for coming on the Taskmaster podcast loved it keep up the good work Ed there we are what a fun episode uh Mel is brilliant uh thank you so much Mel uh for coming on the show um yeah I'm just loving chatting about 4. We will continue to do so next week with Series 4 Episode 5
Starting point is 01:10:07 and we've already recorded that one so you can't get your questions in now but we had lots of good questions for him. The special guest next week is Ian Stirling. Lovely Ian Stirling from Series 8 of Taskmaster and from loads of other great stuff as well you'll know him from
Starting point is 01:10:23 and he's got a sitcom coming up on ITV2 called Buffering, which is very exciting, but we'll be chatting to Ian about series four, episode five. He is a big Taskmaster fan. He will have plenty to say for sure about that episode and his series in general, but thank you very much for listening.
Starting point is 01:10:40 Keep watching Taskmaster on all four. Keep doing your thing. We will see you next week. Goodbye. You can get anything you need with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get an ice r need with Uber Eats. Well, almost almost anything. So no, you can't get an ice rink on Uber Eats. But iced tea and ice cream?
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