Taskmaster The Podcast - Ep 85. *Series 13 Winner* S13 Ep.10
Episode Date: June 16, 2022It's the last episode of Series 13 and of course Ed is joined by the worthy winner! They discuss highs, lows and how it feels to take the trophy! There is also a discussion on who they'd be more intim...ated by in the next Champion of Champions. We hope you have enjoyed Series 13 as much as we have! The podcast will return next for a deep dive in to the brand new Champion of Champions episode. Watch Series 13 of Taskmaster every Thursday at 9pm on Channel 4. Watch all of Taskmaster on All 4www.channel4.com/programmes/taskmaster Visit the Taskmaster Store for all your TM goodies!taskmasterstore.com Visit the Taskmaster YouTube Channelyoutube.com/taskmaster Get in touch with Ed and future guests:taskmasterpodcast@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Hi, it's Terry O'Reilly, host of Under the Influence.
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interesting and surprising. Hear it now on Under the Influence with Terry O'Reilly.
This bonus episode is brought to you by the Ontario Cannabis Store and ACAS Creative. Hello and welcome to the Taskmaster podcast.
It is a happy day and it is a sad day
because this is our final episode discussing series 13 of Taskmaster
and what a series it's been.
It's created classic moments every single episode.
Every contestant has absolutely nailed it in their own way it has been a lot of fun but it is now over it's over we're here to talk about the final episode of Taskmaster series 13 and of course our
special guest is the winner of this series and if for some weird reason you haven't watched that
final episode yet and you
are listening to the podcast stop now go and watch the episode then come back and listen to this
because we will be talking to the winner i don't want to spoil it for you we'll be talking to the
winner and i'm about to tell you who it is the winner of taskmaster series 13 go away if you
haven't heard it sophie duker the winner of taskmaster series 13 is the wonderful sophie
duker she was always a contender all throughout at the beginning i think we all thought chris was Sophie Duker, the winner of Taskmaster Series 13, is the wonderful Sophie Duker.
She was always a contender all throughout.
At the beginning, I think we all thought Chris was going to run away with it,
but he dropped the ball a couple of times and Sophie pounced.
She has been an extremely good contestant.
So looking forward to talking to her about Taskmaster Series 13,
Episode 10, the big finale.
It was a very exciting episode.
Before we chat to Sophie, though,
I will remind you that next week on the 23rd of June,
Taskmaster is not over on a Thursday
because it is Champion of Champions 2.
Next week, 23rd of June, 9pm, Channel 4.
Make sure you watch that.
We will not let Taskmaster stop.
But enough about that.
Let's talk about this.
Series 13, episode 10 of the Taskmaster podcast
with the wonderful Sophie Duker.
Welcome back to the Taskmaster podcast.
It's only the bloody winner of Taskmaster series 13,
Sophie Duker.
It's me!
That's funny.
Hey, hooray!
Hooray. Hooray. Hey, hooray! Hooray.
Hooray.
Also, R, because it's over.
Yeah, R because it's over,
but huge congratulations, Sophie,
on winning Series 13.
Thank you.
I'm lucky for some.
That's so exciting.
The other four sods, but not for me.
Yeah, exactly.
I'm lucky for them.
Now 13's your lucky number.
This is incredible.
I feel like
i feel like it was a deserved win very much felt like a two horse race i'd say from episode one
yeah i think i mean i think i lagged behind in the early episodes i think chris was like
yeah i'm just gonna get the high school anyone's ever got ever yeah it felt like that and then
also i thought bridget i didn't know which of the three of us had won,
to be fair, but that's because I'm bad at maths.
I think if I was good at maths,
I would know that Bridget was not.
Well, I felt like you were all trying to calculate it
because there's a very funny shot of Chris
right at the end before they announced the winner.
And he is sat there after the studio task
and he looks like he's about to find out
like the gender of his child
or like something seriously like something massive in his life is about to happen and he looks so
like nervous and excited and it really I think it really meant a lot to him I think it's fair to say
I'm so delighted that I've snatched that from the jaws
did it mean did it mean as much to you were you did you go in absolutely wanting to win
I think that yeah I think like not yeah how did I put this yeah I did yeah I did but I mean I don't
think I did I don't think I approached it in the way like I didn't look under the desk I didn't
swat up about it because I sort of tried to be like, pretend that it wasn't happening.
So I was still just like, well, you're not good at this, are you?
But I think I more just wanted to win in the moment.
And then when it was like, oh, I could win this whole thing.
Then it became just almost unbearable to be in my body.
But like the last three episodes, it was like, but but it was there were like nice distractions along the way like really wanting judy to win an episode which unfortunately
oh no poor judy i really like because quite quite often when that happens that where someone's not
doing well in a series and the whole narrative is around whether they're going to win an episode
are they going to an episode it does happen so going to win an episode. It does happen.
So series nine, which is the series I was in, David Baddiel was dreadful at Taskmaster, really bad.
And then I think the penultimate episode he won. And it really felt like it was like the producers had somehow made this narrative where he finally won an episode.
It's nice to see it is totally random because the narrative suggested that Judy should finally won an episode. It's nice to see it is totally random
because the narrative suggested
that Judy should have won this episode
and she came bottom again.
She came last.
I think it is completely random,
but I also think there was an episode
she could have won.
I mean, you've probably spoken about this.
You've discussed this.
We have.
And she threw it away, literally,
with her shoes.
She literally threw it away.
But I think there's Gloria in being the best loser
and Gloria in being Judy.
It's pretty incredible.
I mean, yeah, let's talk about this now.
Judy is the highest scoring loser ever on Taskmaster,
which is pretty good.
And I would not have had her down as that,
seeing some of her efforts in the task, to be honest.
But yeah.
I think she was sort of like
spectacular in her bullshit i think like the way she was bad was sort of admirable like even in
this we'll get about when she's talking about that how she saved the ducks lives i mean like
in that particular instance i don't think it worked for anyone but the sort of thread of
bullshit that going through i think that's if I think if that's something that people are scored on,
which it isn't, then she won that.
I think regardless of how Judy did points-wise or placings-wise,
I think she will go down in Taskmaster history
as one of the finest contestants
because she has made me laugh so much throughout this whole series.
Her bullshit this episode, we will get into it,
was not as good as it has been in the previous nine episodes. I think think greg has become inured to it so it didn't quite work as
well as it has done previously um but sophie we're not here to talk about judy we're here to talk
about you the winner of taskmaster series 13 do you have any particular highlights from your series
anything you're really proud of that felt that if they were going to do a little show reel of you as a winner what do you think should be
included oh um i feel like the licky tusk yes it's something that i do not i don't want shown ever again yeah uh someone tweeted about it and said sophie duke's slobbery
tongue which they capitalized as if it was like its own format like bake off
is one of the most disgusting things i have ever seen on television
um but on on the flip side it's also got me a lot of interested dms from queer women so
we're recording this in pride month i feel like a champion of that alone i feel like yeah obviously
you know what some people aren't into some people are really gonna dig so you know and i think we'd
all like to see at least a pitch document for sophie duke a slobbery tongue uh i'd like i'd like to see that on channel four maybe it's an
all four exclusive but i what what would you see the the show actually being sophie duke a
slobbery tongue is it just you licking things around the world is it a travel show oh i mean
sure i think the tongue should have its own sort of persona like maybe it's like a like a character
that comes on like someone like it's like where's sophie's slobbery tongue gonna go today and it's
like you were in bratislava um so yeah i think the tongue is more its own like the paper clip
it's just like an anthropomorphic big tongue like and this is a very deep cut for entertainment
television don't scare the hair which was yeah
yeah yeah it's just it's a it's a tea time family show where a horrible dripping tongue
ruins everything perfect perfect well at least put together the pitch document we would like to see it
did you feel quite competitive towards the end?
From a viewer's perspective,
it felt like, as a group,
you were all actually getting on so well
that it didn't feel competitive.
It felt like you'd all gelled enough
for it to not feel tense in the studio.
I think it was tense,
but only because none of us can count.
And I think there's a really nice moment
that I don't think is in the episode where we all stood behind our easels and held hands and i raised our hands to
the sky because we were just like yeah we just love each other they're just little cute i was
just like when i when i started watching the episode and i saw ardal in his little jacket i
was like i miss these guys yeah my weird taskmaster family so i think everyone did have a lot of affection but um
yeah i think chris definitely wanted to win yeah i think he's very open about that yeah i think
he's quite he's quite open about that i think i think bridget wanted to i feel like bridget
could have won but she did quite she sort of pushed when she did well i think she
when i when she did well i feel like she got the full five points.
She's very good at Taskmaster, I think,
when she can be bothered to read it properly,
when she can be bothered to read the task properly.
And I mean, there's a task coming up later, the cycling task,
which really crystallizes Bridget's main issue and the reason why she didn't win,
which is simply that sometimes she read a rule and thought,
that's stupid, I'm not doing that but which is not the way you win taskmaster you have to
follow the rules to an extent um let's i mean let's let's talk about the episode um you know you said you'd get on with
everyone but you know if you feel free to slug people off if you want okay um the final prize
task of series 13 the finest family heirloom um before we get into this gotta say absolutely
lovely to see arell wearing the leather jacket
from earlier in the series oh such a little gem I think it's good I doubt he's taken it off since
episode 10 because he's got so many compliments on it not just like I think Greg said something
nice about it during the show but like just as he was walking through the corridors he like had
like a different swag about him. It was disgusting to see.
It felt like that.
I think Greg mentions that he gets a bit more of an attitude
when he's got the leather jacket on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Was he sort of walking through the corridors
flicking fingers to people, going,
hey, that sort of thing?
Was there a Fonz vibe to Ardell that day?
I mean, was there a Fonz vibe to Ardell that day I mean was there a Fonz vibes
I think he just I think I think what it is is that I feel like there's been some great
looks on the show but I feel like the boys look like um just a sort of like they just rolled into
and out of River Island and then I mean that is that is so true I don't. I mean, the looks on the show have been pretty incredible,
but it's all been you, Judy and Bridget,
have all been bringing the look.
Your earrings on this episode are absolutely incredible.
Chris, I think, is exclusively dressed by an app.
I think he just...
LAUGHTER
It's efficient. He's an efficient boy. It's efficient.'s an efficient yeah yeah i think he's i genuinely think his podcast is
sponsored by an app that dresses him um but now arnold's put the leather jacket on you can see
yeah a little bit of confidence yeah i feel like for arnold he felt like he was at the Met Ball and that is but what's the theme what's the theme if Ardell's wearing that leather jacket
uncertainty no he was certain about it actually no I take that back we were all certain about
the jacket the jacket looks great I just think it's like maybe hope maybe we were dressed as hope
let's talk about these these heirlooms that people have brought in um let's talk about yours first
the the rice cooker yeah now i you sold this so well i think this might be in terms of the prize
tasks the one that you've sold the best you had this whole thing that you brought in about your
family and about the there's rice at home uh and these perfect examples and I was there you I was transported back to your childhood I thought
it was an amazing presentation um I would question electronics as an heirloom it doesn't quite sit
sit well sit well with me you're like I should have pat tested it I I still use it. I want it back. I still use it. I think it's, I mean,
I feel like you're picking holes
where holes should not be picked
like a certain red jacket and man on the show.
People are bringing in decomposing human matter
onto the show.
Yeah, that's fair.
Have you, so is this something,
you have received the rice cooker
from the previous generation. Is that, is it, how many generations does the rice cooker from the previous generation is that is it
how many generations does the rice cooker go back um i think it's uh just the one
see i wouldn't necessarily count that as an heirloom yet yeah all right i mean judy's okay
i'm not gonna judy's blood goes back to judy also don't don't
think it's judy's blood what she does she cut herself i know there's other ways she could have
got the blood she could have menstruated into a cup and put it that's so much for judy it's not
judy's blood she like wrung the neck of a chicken it's it's a fake heirloom do you so do you think
it's more effort for judy to cut herself
than it is to wring the neck of a chicken yeah oh i don't know maybe what i don't know maybe one of
our kids had a nosebleed it could not be blood it could be red food coloring yeah well look it only
got two points anyway uh so if it wasn't her blood it probably would have got naught points i felt
like it should
have got more because the bullshit was terrible this time and it made me laugh so much it felt
like judy was trying to do what you did when you were presenting the rice cooker so you had all
this amazing emotional stuff this family stuff and you did you said it in such a sort of measured
pointed way and then judy tried to copy your speech rhythms but was just spouting nonsense
it's like if they want more blood then i guess they don't need this expired early
also she's not even the first person to bring in her own blood
to taskmaster as a prize task alice levine did it in series six brought in her own blood
what was the category?
I cannot remember what the category was be a big old creep
all I remember is that Alice brought in blood
her own blood in series 6
so it's not even original
and it's a mad thing to do
but we loved it anyway
and look the rice cooker
I was merely playing devil's advocate
I think it's a good family heirloom
but if you want to keep the points you have playing devil's advocate. I think it's a good family heirloom.
But if you want to keep the points,
you have to prove to me that you pass it down a generation at some point.
You've got many, many years until you need to think about that sort of thing. But someone else in your family needs to get that rice cooker at some point, Sophie.
Okay.
Otherwise, the points are being taken.
I'm taking all four points.
What? What? No. Right? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. And then, and I'm giving them to Chris. okay otherwise the points have been taken i'm taking all four points what what no right yeah
okay and then and i'm giving him to chris
so you know this will be 20 we're 20 30 years away from this cool yeah i'm gonna give it to
my baby nephew okay he's alive he lives in america he could use it as a boat when the floods come
perfect this is great great um chris gets four points as well
which i would question for his antique italian coffee table um i thought it i mean i like the
idea of it playing the godfather music when you open open it but we didn't hear it in action we
didn't see it in action so it's quite a boring coffee table really i feel like chris really
banks on the promise of something happening when you open it yeah like like i think i think this might have been episode
two when he had the briefcase which was amazing yeah but it was all speculation
yeah it was you figure if you're halfway down the road with that um coffee table it's not playing
the godfather it's playing like the sopranos straight in a skip straight in a skip for me
actually if it played the sopranos that'd a skip straight and a skip for me actually if
it played the sopranos that'd be a nice surprise but without the music that is nothing so and we
didn't hear the music so i felt like four points was very generous but i think greg was in final
final mood i think he was giddy he was giddy he was happy he was giddy yeah he was generous
ardle brought in a biscuit tim with his granny's birth cert in.
Bullshit.
You don't think it had his granny's birth cert in?
No, no.
Bridget opened up her weird, horrible,
necro-mancer box of pregnancy tests and regret.
Ardell could have propped up the birth cert. Yeah, he could have propped up the birth cert.
Yeah, he could have propped up the birth cert.
I don't even think there were biscuits in that. I think Ardell
had eaten them. I think he was just like, bring in the
tin. Yeah.
I know that you and my granny were...
Yeah, quite possibly
but it was worth a few points for birth
cert at least, which I've never heard anyone
do before for birth cert.
People generally don't try to be cool about their natal information.
My birth cert.
I got my birth cert.
My DOP.
My PASI-P.
Bridget, I mean, I know this is real
because Bridget's told me about this box before.
She mentioned it when she did Off Menu.
A box with her kids' hair, teeth and positive pregnancy tests.
I mean, can we talk first of all about,
I think this is the only time Ardell has got his interruptions wrong.
As soon as Bridget starts speaking, Ardell interrupts her
and it's the only time where you see a bit of fire in Bridget's eyes
and she's like, I'm about to smack this guy down.
And she does perfectly well because he tries to,
it tries to trick her, corner her,
and say that she doesn't know what DNA stands for.
Don't fuck with Bridget's knowledge.
She knows it immediately.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I, I, I wanted to Google that because I didn't know if it was right.
I think it is right.
But I would have just been like
oh dynamo
for
apples
and I bet people would have applauded because no one
knows what it stands for we know it's acid
nucleic acid
deoxy
no one would have applauded you saying apples at the end Sophie
yeah okay fine
apple acid
I'd have just uh yeah i'd have
i'd have prompt it yeah she knew it to the syllable she knew it yeah uh and it's great i mean it's
terrifying she keeps this box but also i thought you'd be you'd be more on board with this because
you're a lot of your taskmaster series has been quite sort of not not gruesome but you've done a lot of sort of uh you're quite death obsessed
i'd say yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah obviously killing alex you love to you love to talk about killing
alex uh you when you had the big hat and the big shoes it was a an entire funeral scene that you
created yeah i would have been i don't think i can say this the thing about Bridget's children is that they are still alive I mean just the
the uncanny
and the macabre and you know
teeth and teeth and hair
and all of that stuff
I think it may be too scary
too real I think the sight of a positive
pregnancy test for me is terrifying
so I was just like yeah
don't do this i don't keep
anything that's got piss on it as a rule as a rule you're not anything if you're not pissed
on anything that you've liked enough to keep yeah but if it's if i get a drop of piss on some clothes
i can wash those i'm not putting it in a box and keeping it in my attic have you ever kept your piss so you say um have i ever kept my piss
or you get all the tricky questions on the taskmaster podcast yeah i'm trying to think
if i've ever pissed on no i was thinking when i what i would keep if i was if i got bitten by a
snake and i had to piss on my hand something that i think has been proved not to work if you get please anyone listening to this if you get bitten by a snake don't piss on your
own hand you are wasting valuable time the poison is doing its work okay sorry yeah a jellyfish
i'm not rash i'm not acting rashly i've been bitten by a snake If I was bitten by a jellyfish
I would piss on everything
Yeah
But you're just supposed to piss on where the jellyfish has stung you
You don't piss on everything
That's not how it works
I'm sure I would piss on things and keep them
Has someone pissed on a house party?
On a bed? They just sort of went and
pissed on a bed and you're not gonna throw out a bed are you people piss in beds all the time
you're washing it i guess i mean all i'm saying is i'm fine with the pregnancy test if bridget
has maybe just given given it a quick wipe over after um her box of horrors got five points it
was four points for ardle ch, Chris and you, Sophie.
And Judy got a disappointing two points, I thought.
I thought she deserved maybe three for bringing in a vial of what she claimed to be her own blood.
But as we've established, she just wrung a chicken's neck.
Just wrung a chicken's neck.
Bridget.
The most precious thing that has been handed down is DNA.
My proudest achievement, the thing that is most precious...
Excuse me, can I just... And I hate to interrupt so early.
Oh, no, that is very rude. He just...
He made me say the whole word for search,
so I think the least you could do is...
LAUGHTER
DNA.
What, deoxynucleic acid?
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Oh! Oh! In your face arnold task one identify the liquids most accurately identified liquids wins you have
10 minutes your time starts now a lot of liquid chat on this episode so far um now this is another
one of those tasks that some for some people it's slightly too gross you can
see people look a bit upset about this and they don't want to get stuck in you i mean talking of
the slobbery tongue get that involved again you just throw yourself into things like this
yeah i love it i think i don't know if it's too it's probably not too early to say this because this is the last podcast episode of the series uh i think my tongue won me taskmaster yeah tbh
tongue master i think this tongue master i think this little guy is what i was surprised at how
good i was at this task if i do say so yeah well i mean huge shout out straight away for lychee juice. Yeah.
Where the hell did that come from?
I mean, Judy got it as well.
She mentioned lychee.
I wouldn't be able to pick a lychee out of a lineup, let alone by taste.
How often are you having a lychee juice or indeed a lychee?
Rarely.
It's a sometime food.
I think they're kind of a bit like eyeballs so while they are
delicious don't often want to schlub one into my mouth no fair fair you never you never forget
your first it's what they say in the light community too well it was incredible uh you
and judy both got both got lychee juice uh which is great but you really threw yourself into it and
you are a rule follower.
And I say this, this is a compliment.
You're such a rule follower.
You added rules where there were no rules.
And it said if you open, you can open the tire, basically,
but you can only push on it with the chopstick.
But you were trying to open a valve on a bike tire
using chopsticks in the traditional manner.
How long were you trying to do that, do reckon i think over half the time but also he didn't say anything like
it looks like he's been like oh sophie you're having a bit of a you know that it he just did
he just watched me do it yeah of course because it was absolutely hilarious he knows he knows
what's happening there he's doing the edit in his head as he goes along we're gonna cut back
to sophie and she's still trying to twiddle the valve off using the chopsticks
yeah i felt humiliated because i don't know how to change a bike tire and i ride a bike so i was
like this is right yeah now you know ineffective you know you don't do it with chopsticks right
yes i do know that now um and ardle even tried to say that you got you got an advantage because alex told you you're not
supposed to use the chopsticks to open the valve i don't think that was an advantage i think that
he took pity on you yeah which i'm grateful for yes absolutely um i mean look everyone gets at
least one right i think bridget gets two and she's the least.
And then Ardell, Chris and Judy all get three correct.
Judy just looks absolutely disgusted by the whole thing.
Yeah.
She's not done well in these tasks where you need to be messy.
She's not going to get involved in that for too long.
Yeah, she doesn't like stuff her nails getting
on them she was just yeah but i like how she sprayed it on spray that horrible vinegar on
alex's wrist yeah i love that she's used alex at every given opportunity i think her dream would
just be walking into every task and going alex you do this for me yeah yeah i mean that happened
in a later task which all that was, Alex helps. Where's Alex?
Chris obviously throws himself into it and asks if balloon juice is a thing.
That's one of his guesses, is balloon juice.
But to get pickled onion vinegar that quickly as well,
that is a man from the North.
I was like, yeah, that's a real,
I was like, yeah, straight in.
I didn't know what that was for quite a while.
I think I knew it was vinegar, but I was like, I don't know,
the different types of vinegars.
I'm a down south kombucha girl.
I was like, this is fermented.
I was like, is this tea?
Strawberry kombucha, I think it might be.
Bridget just, I just watch Bridget do anything, to be honest.
She's panicked and relaxed all at the same time in everything she does.
And still, I think, and it's coming up later,
I don't, Alex is ruder to her than he's been to any other contestant ever, I think.
Do you think so?
Yeah.
What did he say to her in this one?
So there's one coming up in the bike one,
where she manages to make him stop and then she just really takes ages doing stuff
and he's like, yeah, he's in that time well.
And he would never do that to anyone else.
Just little snipey little comments under his breath.
It's a lot of fun to watch.
He's set up.
He's tired.
He's tired of Bridget.
No, yeah, I mean, yeah. That's. He's tired. He's tired of Bridget. No.
Yeah, I mean, yeah.
Yeah, because it started...
That's why it's indicating.
Yeah, it started with the shoe task
where Bridget asked 140-something questions
and that's when he really started to lose his rag
and I wonder whether all the other times you've seen it
came after that or on the same day.
Yeah, I feel like that might have been a thing
because he is just like,
there is an order to this and if you deliberately yeah exactly completely because i'm guessing the
bike task was on the same day as the shoe task wasn't it yes it was and probably came after right
um yeah it did do you want to know a fun fact about the that day for me yes please uh on that
day i nearly shat myself yes thank you uh i want i don't know i i got sort of like seconds to spare
i had some bad eggs in the morning and shat myself while still miked
in the toilet for about 40 minutes all the liquids left my body yeah um and then i had to do some of
the most physical tasks of the series on that day um yeah so i hated it every single time that we
did that day i I absolutely hated it.
Sophie, you couldn't tell.
At no point when I was watching these stuff did I think,
Sophie's just shat all the liquids out of her body.
Yeah, I had to lie down for like two hours in the grass.
It was a bad time.
Let's finish talking about this liquids task.
Ardell names the three main liquids, brandy, water and milk.
There's a shot of ardle in this that i think sums up his entire um his entire existence on taskmaster and just his
general attitude where he's uh got soup on the end of his nose and he just grins inanely i think
it's perfect i want that as a poster on my wall um he's such a delight um it was a very good task
for you uh you guessed four correctly.
You got the five points.
Ardell, Chris and Judy all guessed three correctly.
Four points for them and two for Bridget.
She got three points.
And you were reckless with the balloon pop.
You were more reckless than I thought,
especially as you thought it was vomit.
Really and truly, it could have been classed as vomit
because once it burst, it started to mix with all the other stuff
and that's really what vomit is. That's what vomit
Realize that your nose was such a powerful weapon and you're asked like she straight. Yeah
Genuinely impressive. So a very cautious woman who was only choosing to use one sense
Did pretty well. Yes by stark contrast
Ardell
Just seemed hungry. Balls? Mozzarella balls and arancini balls? Yes, we deliver those. Moose? No, but moose head?
Yes, because that's alcohol and we deliver that too.
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Let's talk about this one then.
Task 2, return of some ducks as always classic taskmaster motif
get the most ducks in alex's basket you may only hold one duck at a time if alex rings his backward
bell you must walk backwards until he honks his forwards horn alex will pedal as far as he can
until you say one of the magic words if you say a magic word alex will rest for 10 seconds all the
magic words are single use magic words alex will cycle
around the circuit for 10 minutes your time starts when alex honks his horn let's talk about what you
did because it is a stroke of genius sophie duca thank you so much the arrows changing the arrows
so you got him locked in a little spiral in a little loop he couldn't do anything tornado
i mean not a tornado like a very like a small man going on a big bike very now now i've said
that you're genius i'm gonna say something else now sophie and i'm not sure you're gonna like oh
oh boy in the last task where ardle accused you of getting an advantage because of something Alex said. And I don't think that counted, right?
Here, I think you got an advantage that no one else got.
When you got in Alex's way, Alex said under his breath, I have to cycle in the direction of the arrows.
That is not anything that's stipulated in the task.
And it's not something he said to anyone else.
And I think that's what gave you the idea of switching the arrows around.
he said to anyone else and i think that's what gave you the idea of switching the arrows around now i think you took the i think you took what you were given and you ran with it and you thought
very laterally and i think still if i was given the information i have to go in the direction of
the arrows i still wouldn't have thought to do that i think the reason he said that is because
i was blocking his path and he was trying not to kill me or run over me.
And I think that
because I showed the ingenuity
of actually blocking him
is why he said it
and consistently blocking it
because he couldn't just turn around.
Judy blocked him.
So I think it was the strategy.
He didn't say it to Judy.
Judy was blocking him
and he didn't say
I have to go in the direction of the arrows.
And I'm certainly not saying
if he had said that,
Judy would have done what you did all i'm saying is very impressive but i think you might have been
given a slight advantage to come up with that impressive thing potentially maybe it was it
maybe it was wonderful to watch very fun thank you but then i did not shit myself again i think a victory
the boys i mean the boys did it quite straight down the line uh you know much like their dress
sense it was uh it ardle just shouted as many words as he could none of which were a magic word
he somehow hadn't realized that all of the magic words were written on the back of the tiny ducks i did not realize that either to be fair you just don't
spot these things when you're in a panic right i completely don't spot them you don't he did
he did well for a small boy he did well for a small boy uh chris just absolute classic chris
ramsey just really went for it just Just did it in quite a basic way,
straight down the line,
but really threw himself into it
and ended up getting the five points because of it.
It's pretty impressive.
He is knackered after that, as is Alex.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's an athlete.
He is.
He's an athlete.
I mean, he's an all-rounder, Chris.
He's an all-rounder.
I feel like he's been quite willing to be physical, though,
and quite good at the physical stuff
throughout the series
I think we could probably put together a good compilation
of all of the sporty stuff
so there's this running obviously
there's the game that he invented
and sausages which is
I'm never going to stop thinking about sausages
crawling around with the balls
very physical
I was saying he likes being on his hands and knees
he's a grafter he's a pickled onion man from the north
now you found a really good uh a really good get around with the arrows both bridget and judy also
found very good ways of getting around it and thinking laterally but both of them
completely threw it away
by then cheating
Bridget removed the basket
which is one of those
amazing moments in Taskmaster
where you see that
and you're like
of course
of course just removed the basket
of course
yeah
but she was the only one
who thought of it
but then
she just ignored it
and started putting two in
at a time
because she read it
the first time
and went what you can only hold one at a time because she read it the first time and went,
what, you can only have one at a time?
That can't be right, can it?
Of course it's on the rules, Bridget.
It may not make sense.
It's silly, but that's the whole point of the show.
You can't just ignore things.
So frustrating.
That was heartbreaking.
That wasn't, as Greg said, that wasn't fun to watch.
But I think, like, I don't think,
I don't think that happened to me at any point apart from, like,
the tank, which Bridget did as well, I think. Yeah, I think, don't think that happened to me at any point apart from like the tank which bridget did as well yeah yeah i think yeah did that but you were reading things and
taking them into account on that one it just slipped out of your mind bridget reads things
takes them into account and then decides that they can't possibly be something she needs to
stick to she sticks to the rules that she feels like she should be given um but it was brilliant
to remove the basket worth
it for that i mean judy's performance in this task i made me cry with laughter at the end um
the chain coming off brilliant idea just break alex's bike what's he gonna do
um and then getting on the bike herself and then just that final shot of her throwing up like gang
signs at the end just straight down the camera like just alex
terrified bike broken just perfect so chaotic absolutely amazing yeah it was kind of like
classic bullying it was just like there's a kid playing a game you decide to play but then you
start yeah i mean it was just yeah and then you're like just like we're friends and
like alex is broken it deserved 1 million points i think i think it should have got 1 million points
and then the series to judy um we did get that amazing i mean you mentioned it earlier this
amazing torrent of bullshit that she just came out with about holding the ducks close to her breasts
and looking after the duck and all of this and i feel like i mean a lot of people said they're not real judy i feel like genuinely in
her head they were real ducks on that day they were i think they were i think i mean i feel like
you feel the ducks i love the ducks i didn't i think just seeing something that's more innocent
than you when you're in something that is that is just like, you're like,
I'm the adult here, this duck.
I don't like the big ducks, but the little ducks,
I'm just like, the flock.
Yeah, the big ducks, I agree with you.
I don't like the look of the big ducks.
No rubber duck should be that big.
Creepy.
Creepy stuff.
Creepy, arrogant.
Bridget got 148 ducks but was disqualified absolutely heartbreaking
Judy got 90 ducks disqualified again heartbreaking so
um Ardell got 48 by playing it straight down the line three points well done
you got 61 ducks four points and Chris amazingly just by throwing himself into it got 65 ducks 5
points this is I mean really
really distills what
this series has been like you and Chris almost
neck and neck for the whole thing really
Joggy
Duckling
No
Goose
Head boy
Head boy. Head boy?
Architecture.
LAUGHTER
I hate you. I absolutely hate you.
Oh, God.
Still looking for the magic word? Yeah. OK.
This is absolutely horrible.
Ten seconds.
You're a psychopath.
You're a psychopath.
Let's talk about task three,
the final pre-recorded task of series 13 of Taskmaster.
And it's a good one.
Record the best multi-track song about your team.
You must record all six tracks with your voice or body,
and each person must record the same number of tracks.
Most powerful multi-track song wins.
You have 20 minutes.
Your time starts now.
Let's talk about the boys' team,
or the Tungsten Diamsten diamonds as they were known.
It was nonsense.
It was nonsense.
The track was not,
I mean,
I think Greg was very generous giving three points for this because it was
absolute nonsense and shows to any future contestants in taskmaster who
might be listening,
never use a task to call back to a previous task because it might not be
shown.
Yeah,
it was the, what? do you not do you not do you genuinely not remember this task i don't think we did it i think they i
i think it was something that the boys did and did weird so they were like let's strike this
for the show the record we didn't do anything with an overview so it's genuinely like in the studio we just thought that they were making that they
were making it up but i think actually it is a task that they did that we did not do that they
dropped before they got to your team day yeah i mean it does sound like they're having a breakdown
but some of the lyrics as well blood's thicker than water but our team juice is thicker than blood what are you what are you talking about that is horrible i thought maybe balloon juice it was hot
it was nasty and also it was like as if we look at taskmaster as like a sort of um vessel for like
homoerotic content which i like to do i felt like it was sort of meant to be a love song to greg
but ardle was just like hissing chris like for about 70 of it
it was just like chris chris chris
i mean it was mad i mean look the song itself was fine it was quite catchy chris got into a bit of
a flow at the beginning that broke down but you know it was there for it was there for a second
um but it was nothing compared to the
house queens um absolutely astonishing work from all of you guys uh especially i mean when you when
you're actually listening to it you've got judy doing a really nice melody there you've got you
spitting some pretty some pretty hot lyrics over the top and then when you break it down and just hear that bridget bridget is whistling like some 1960s folk singer it worked i did i don't know what bridget is doing in that she's
just whistling away and the dancing is insane yeah i mean the dancing i think like when we're
recording it and we just watch you to record your bit by yourself so I think
the whistling and the stamping I think they might even have been recorded separately
yeah yeah so like it's not even I was just about to say like she was stamped for the bits when she
wasn't whistling but I think it was literally just her standing there doing like a dance to
music she knew would be there but wasn't that it was yeah because that was literally just her standing there and doing like a dance to music she knew would be there,
but wasn't.
Yeah, because that was one of her tracks, I guess.
So you had two tracks each.
Yeah.
And then the whistling was, it was just.
Crazy.
Absolutely crazy.
I mean.
But essential in the end.
Absolutely essential.
It really added something.
And I think it sums up that last studio record
of taskmaster when everyone's lost their minds a little bit when when they showed the footage
of bridget walking in the pedometer task and put the house queen's track over the top of it
and and you cut back to the studio and everyone's crying everyone's just crying with laughter
because you'd all lost it by this point it's the final task you're knackered you're sad it's over and just in tears yeah we did a celebratory uh bridget
dance at the end which i think you can see before we cut out lovely really nice also i still think
bridget's quite annoyed about it i still i still don't think she thinks oh look at the funny look
at the funny way i walk i look at the funny way i'm dancing she sticks by it i think she's pissed off about it but i think yeah
bridget's brain is incredible um by which i mean she knows what deoxynucleic acid is
but also her brain sometimes doesn't work so she's just like stop making me out to be
some sort of buffoon um but you know yeah incredible no it was it was five points uh to the house queens plus bears
uh and three points amazingly to the tungsten diamonds i do not think they deserved it i think
it's because it was the last task they got a generous score task master things faster we're
gonna cook you some pasta we're gonna take you to the other room and beat you till you need a plaster.
Oh, Greg, what you doing?
Why you sitting there on that throne?
Cos when the house queens come into the Taskmaster house,
you're gonna be left all alone.
One team, one dream
We all scream for the house queens
One team, one dream
We all scream for the house queens Answer the house queens one team one dream we all scream for the house queens enter the house queens
let's talk quickly about the live task um draw a life-size self-portrait your nose must be poking
through your nose hole at all times most accurate accurate self-portrait wins. You have 200 seconds.
I mean, the way Judy starts this,
Judy is scribbling with the abandon of someone
who knows they're never winning an episode.
Yeah, I think she was just like, let's go.
Let's go. Let's just scribble something out.
Let's do this. Let's just, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But it sort of came together.
More than Ardels together more than Ardels
more than Ardels
Ardels was an absolute disaster
I couldn't see what was happening
but I was like
when she started
I was like
this is
she's
but then it sort of
had a vibe
who starts with the body
was that the body
it was the collar of her top
she was just sort of
she was wildly scribbling
and then
she thought i'll start on features after a bit of prompting from alex and greg um but it was
mad and then obviously i think she knows that she is at her best when she does something terribly
and then has to justify it afterwards yeah and that's exactly what she did but greg wasn't buying
it today it was two points for judy ardle a well-deserved one point an absolute disaster um four four points for you which i actually thought was quite generous i um
as i said all right one of your eyes was floating off the side of your head
yeah but at least i had eyes i think it was i don't think okay maybe you're a fan of like the
trad the trad methods of illustration,
but I think that might be it. Yeah. I knew what I was doing. Yeah. I think I'm too much of a
traditionalist. Yeah, exactly. It was very, it was very Picasso actually. Um, and Bridget and
Chris, I thought Chris's was the best. I'll put that out there. I thought Chris deserved the five
points. I thought maybe Bridget didn't deserve the five points as well. Uh, but, but that's me.
I love the trad, I love trad forms of illustration, you know?
You love the old masters.
I love the old masters, like Chris Ramsey.
The old taskmasters.
So it was five points to Bridget and Chris,
four points to you, Sophie,
two points to Judy,
and one point to Ardal.
That means you win the final episode of Taskmaster
with 22 points, closely followed by Chris on 21
Bridget on 18 Ardle on 15 Judy on 13 and that is the exact rankings of the series in the end
Judy on 142 highest scoring loser ever which is pretty good going Ardle 153 Bridgetget, 157. Big jump up then to Chris on 170.
And Sophie, you are the champion of Taskmaster with 173 points.
How do you feel?
I mean, incredible.
It's like when I watched it
and your head goes gold.
I don't know if this happens to you.
The round count was like,
this is...
It's the best thing that's ever happened to me in my life it was i think i just i felt like i was on america's next top model except not you know just another hideously exploitative
terrifying format i was like this is i licked the head yeah i I mean, it's a wonderful moment, isn't it?
It is.
Well, it was.
It meant a lot.
My little brother was in the audience.
That was nice.
He was like, no, you got a first.
Now this is your job.
Yeah, it felt good.
I'm not going to lie.
Did you have a rap was there a big
rap party afterwards was there a chance for you to take the trophy around the rap party did you
all celebrate um so i said my brother was in the audience he came backstage and congratulated me
and it was also the first time i met my little nephew because of coronavirus and they live in
america so we were in the dressing room and my brother was like what
is this show and his his uh baby immediately attacked greg just like immediately ran at the
trophy smacked it to the ground and now greg has like a hole in the back of his head like he's like
oh my god yeah he's still intact the trophy's intact but a child in the back of his head. Like he's like, Oh my God. Yeah. He's still intact.
The trophy's still intact.
But a child,
like the pure innocence and like knowledge and virtue of a child saw the
taskmaster's head and knew they had to destroy it.
Yeah.
So,
yeah,
yeah.
So that's,
that's what happened.
Then there was a lovely party.
Oh,
great.
Which is,
which is nice we've got some emails
now obviously
these emails have come in
before
anyone knows
you've won
but we're going to ask
these questions anyway
we've got a load in
this is a great one
from Des in Sidcup
dear Sophie
do you own a wardrobe yet
no no come on surely you've got to get yourself a ward you're a taskmaster winner don't let the
side down you've got a you've got a proud tradition to keep up get yourself a wardrobe
yeah i'll get i'll get a wardrobe i'll get a wardrobe i haven't done it yet i will
i'll take my winnings and i'll buy a wood i just it feel yeah fine
what like what do you want me to say i'll go i'll go down to home base thank you thank you i've got
i've got a question for you before we go to the uh other emails um of course one of the things
that you know you think about when you're when you're playing Taskmaster is if you win, one of the actual prizes really
is you then get to go and do Champion of Champions.
Yes!
Which is extremely exciting.
I can't wait.
Yes, you can't wait. Good. I'm glad to hear it.
I won't wait.
Obviously, you've got Sarah Kendall uh you've got sarah kendall and you've got morgana robinson
and you so far in this lineup for next champion of champions yeah how do you fancy your chances
against those two so i didn't watch that much morgana's series because i was like i gotta stay
away from i can't be too close to the stuff so I
don't know that much about how Morgana was but I hear just kind of great like kind obviously you
gotta be you gotta be kind of great to win taskmaster I watched Sarah Kendall's series
and I was intimidated like I remember the moment where she like some like sugar or salt like flew
in the wind and she tasted it and she was like that's sweet
during a team task and i was like yeah she's pretty formidable yeah um so i think out of the
two of them i think at the moment sarah kendall feels like the biggest competition yeah i think
she's very consistent um sarah kendall but so are you i'd say that you're very consistent as well
morgana it depends which morgana turns up on the day uh she is wildly creative uh and i think i think she's she's always a always a terrifying opponent
i think um but it's good it's already shaping up what what a great lineup already for champion of
champions three uh so we'll look forward to that let's um have some more questions this is from
anna in the isle of wight uh dear sophie who was a more baffling teammate bridget or judy the three of you make a wonderful team and the high five task was so
much fun to watch who was the more baffling teammate for you sophie that is a tough a tough
question anna from the isle of wight um i think that i found possibly equally baffling but I found Bridget's lack of a competitive spirit
most frustrating because she reads the tasks so slowly and also will just like I feel like you
can predict the way in which like Judy's going to say something mental because Judy's like, I want to sing or like,
I think we should twerk on Alex.
But when like Bridget's like,
I think,
yeah,
I think I should wish.
I don't know.
I think,
yeah,
I think it's just sort of impossible to know how to react,
but also to,
yeah,
it's just sort of a,
yeah.
Yeah.
I completely get that.
Especially if you're going after it and you're like,
come on,
let's do this task. And Bridget's like, is like well just like just offer it in her own world which works
for her on multiple occasions as well i must say it is an advantage i think bridge edges it on
baffling yeah i think so this is a great email i've never read an email like this this is from
kim in michigan i just wanted to pick a bone with ed and also greg about this one sophie brought in a wand massager for the most relaxing prize task and those are definitely
not intended for one body part as you suggested they were originally made as a non-sexual massager
for sore muscles and are still often used that way i will now go and unpause the podcast and
finish the episode so there we go i've got to apologize to you sophie apparently for suggesting
that the wand massager uh is only is only intended for one body part i would however suggest that
when you brought it in you knew exactly what everyone would think and that's why you brought
it in i like people to feel relaxed i'm not gonna i think i don't know i wouldn't want to
cheapen this podcast by implying that
something that people might use one massages for is the main reason i brought it in yeah
yeah there was a clear brief and i responded to the brief yeah and that's all i'm gonna say on it
what you want me to be like yeah i brought in because i wanted whoever want to wank themselves with it i wanted someone
to take my take my fries and stick it in their protected protected regions and i wanted to
buzz buzz buzz and sorry my description of masturbation is horrible and that's why i
yeah no i just wanted them to relax I apologise for having such a dirty mind
and assuming that those massages are intended for one body part
and they are still used for multiple body parts.
I would suggest that I bet people buy them for multiple body parts,
realise what they can do with them
and then it is only used for one body part.
No one's going back to the full body massage
after they've done it after
they've done it in the one part okay i will accept that this is an email from kerry in chicago uh hi
ed and sophie long time listener first time caller my family and i had a general question about series
13 of taskmaster which we'd like you and your guests to answer do the contestants get any time
before filming starts
to give the Taskmaster house a once-over
to get the lay of the land, so to speak?
While specific items in rooms may change,
it does seem like people very often know
a specific item they need is in the shed
or something else is in the living room.
So is there any time given to let the contestants
familiarise themselves with this strange new environment
or is it something that just happens
as they go through the process of completing tasks thanks love the podcast
sophie great question lovely bit of triv well you will know this i mean it might have changed
between series you don't get specific time to walk around uh i think maybe you do get
i think you maybe you do get shown it very very quickly once at the start at 6 a.m on the first
day but not in any detailed way of like,
this is what's here.
It's just like,
this is a house.
That's the garden done.
And I think you just build up a knowledge as you go along of what's in what
room.
I'm going to,
I think it also like,
there are a few tasks that don't make the edit.
So you might have used like a length of rope and know that it's,
know that it's there for the next time.
Yes.
I think that's true.
I think,
I don't think it
has changed i think they still have the same thing where um where one of the andys i think it was
andy andy c for me takes you around the house before you do any tasks and goes this is the lab
this is the you know this is the this is the caravan this is the garden this is the shed or
whatever so you know where you can go and everywhere you can go because obviously there's
like a little production office where you can't go and then there's your dressing
room there as well so you do get a little look around and it helps knowing the show i'd obviously
seen every episode of the show before so i knew i knew where everything was um but in terms of items
i think you pick it up as you go along so you might look in the shed because you know you can get stuff in the shed
and see a roll of tape and it's not helpful in that
task but then two tasks down the
line you suddenly need a roll of tape so you can go straight
there it's just about being
observational the tape task yeah
you've just got to keep your eyes open which
some contestants are better at than others
I think this is our first question
from Croatia this is from Ivana in Croatia
hi Ed and Sophie I've got a big big fan base in Croatia yeah yeah I thought so than others i think this is our first question from croatia this is from ivana in croatia uh
hi i've got a big big big fan base in croatia yeah yeah i thought so um my question is was
there a task that you were really looking forward to people seeing and was there a task you were
dreading being shown um what are my faves fave tasks cool photo liked it liked getting uh alex's stickers tongue out
and be a little pooch um also thought i look quite cool in the pedometer task and i thought that the
um task with all the uh not children stuffed toys the task with all the stuffed toys i was like i
climbed a tree unfortunately chris did it as well so i was like i'm i'm intrepid so i was like i was quite proud of those um the potometer one was great as well
because you put it on the end of the drill and it flew off that was a great that was a great moment
i think universally in the crew no one wanted me to do that
but i knew it would look kind of cool. I found,
I think,
oh,
wait,
there was one that I was like,
I just,
I hate the,
I think the performance ones just made me feel sort of ill.
Even though they're fun to watch everyone else.
I just was like,
please don't make me go back to my comedy improv days of doing a rapper,
Alex, or like a freestyle in the house queen the house queens was joyful because we by that time i had my sister
queens with me it was good so i was like we're all in this together and objectively bridget looks
more stupid but i felt anything before me yeah i completely understand that because it's it's you know part of your job
right so yeah if you if you do it badly it's like you're doing your job badly whereas if you
do a pedometer wrong it's not like it's connected to something that is actually your life
i actually walk quite a lot in my life so uh yeah that was that felt personal for me you use the
phrase there um oh don't make me do a rap at Alex.
The task was to not have a rap battle with Alex.
It was duel, do a duel.
So you weren't being forced into doing the rap.
And I do remember you looking markedly uncomfortable
in that task as well.
It was so horrible.
But I think the thing that if I was going to,
I was going to reassess my strat,
strategy for champion of champions, I think i'm quite a verbal person
i think i'm just like oh you want to fight me with your mind um and people are like no i just
want to just want to fight you um so i think that i would uh be more in my body to avoid having to
in doing the tasks because i think that i was like, oh wait, this is some sort of crossword puzzle.
I was like, what's the linguistic trick
that the taskmaster's trying to do?
He's just stuck a code word on a duck's ass
and it's not actually that deep.
So yeah, I think that that's how my strat would change.
Well, don't change your strat too much
because this strat won you Series 13.
Thank you so much for coming back
on the Taskmaster podcast, Sophie Duker.
We, of course, always ask our guests to rate
their experience on the podcast between
1 and 5 points. I can't remember
what you gave us last time but please
now in the style of the
Taskmaster please rate your experience
on this podcast today between
1 and 5 points.
I feel the first
time I wouldn't have given you the full 5
because to be honest it wasn't a five out of five experience.
But this podcast, I feel joyful.
I've won the series.
I've won the episode.
I get to reminisce about the happiest moments in my sad, tiny little life.
It's an absolute five for me.
This will never happen again.
Thank you very much.
It will never happen again unless we're champion of champions,
series three.
We're going to get you back on for that,
I'm sure.
Thank you very much,
Sophie Duker,
for coming on the Taskmaster podcast
and congratulations
for being the champion of series 13.
Thanks so much to Sophie
for coming in,
a deserved and wonderful champion.
I'm sure she will do great work
touring around the world with the trophy,
as is the responsibility of all Taskmaster champions.
Thank you very much, Sophie Duker.
That's the end of Series 13.
It seems a shame to say goodbye,
but don't forget, next Thursday,
you get Champion of Champions,
23rd June, 9 p.m channel 4
make sure you tune in for that we'll be chatting about it on the podcast and then straight after
that we will be getting back into series six where we hit pause and then seven and then eight and
then nine and future series of taskmaster basically my job never stops and i don't know if you know
this i do some other stuff as well but this this is it now, mainly just talking about Taskmaster.
And I love it.
Thank you very much to Sophie Duker for coming on the show.
Thank you very much for listening to the Taskmaster podcast throughout Series 13.
We hope you stick around for all the other episodes.
I've been Ian Gamble. Thank you very much. Bye-bye. Hi, it's Terry O'Reilly, host of Under the Influence.
Recently, we created an episode on cannabis marketing.
With cannabis legalization, it's a brand new challenging
marketing category. And I want to let you know we've produced a special bonus podcast episode
where I talk to an actual cannabis producer. I wanted to know how a producer becomes licensed,
how a cannabis company competes with big corporations, how a cannabis company markets its products in such a highly regulated category,
and what the term dignified consumption actually means. I think you'll find the answers interesting
and surprising. Hear it now on Under the Influence with Terry O'Reilly.
This bonus episode is brought to you by the Ontario Cannabis Store and ACAS Creative.