Taskmaster The Podcast - Series 16 Best of #1
Episode Date: December 14, 2023On this week's podcast we gather some of the most memorable moments from our Series 16 episodes. Who can forget John Kearns' Captain Hook performance or Ivo's wooden spoon story!? Enjoy these highligh...ts and come back next week for some more! You can find all the latest Taskmaster exclusive news here: taskmaster.tv Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Do you want to see what the world is really like?
Yes.
Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining.
A woman planting her course to free to add in love for.
It's non-stop bonkers brilliance.
I love that.
Four things.
It's like theaters December 15th. Hello and welcome to the Taskmaster podcast, it's Ed Gamble here, host of the Taskmaster
podcast that you're listening to now.
Today is the first of two special best of episodes.
We've put together some of our favourite moments from the most recent series and packed
some up like a nice, early, crazy present, short for Christmas present.
And don't expect it to all be task-based, in true taskmaster podcast fashion, we often
go off on some weird and wacky tangents, with our guests, like when Susan Wakama told
us about her drama school final performance, or when John Cairns recited some dialogue
from Hook, of course. It's all here for you to enjoy your time starts now.
I like saying your time starts now.
It doesn't really make sense in that context that I just used it in,
but I guess your time to listen starts now,
but you can pause podcasts,
so it doesn't really make sense.
You can't pause Taskmaster Tasks.
That would make things far too easy.
Anyway, bye!
Are you enjoying the series so far, Greg?
Uh, I mean, stupid question.
Obviously, of course, I'm enjoying it.
This show is my... it's just... honestly.
If they could put it on every day, I would watch it every day.
Yeah.
And I'd still be as giddy and happy.
I love this series.
And I think there's something about this series
that shouldn't work at least working.
I don't... I feel like they've deliberately gone a little radical with the casting.
Yes. Yes. I mean, that's working.
They do, it feels like they normally sort of, there's normally some spanners in the work
or there's some sort of left field dice rolling going on when they cast the show. But this
one particularly, when I heard the line up, I was like, wow, I've never even
thought about these people in the same day, let alone imagine them on a show together.
Yeah, I mean, I would say they've gone to the Maverick shed and they've gone, I'll have
four Mavericks, please.
And you may not only have one Maverick, you may have the Maverick and then, you know,
some competent people and someone older and younger.
Now you said that they're going to the Maverick Shed and asking for four Mavericks.
Who do you consider on this lineup to be the non-Maverick?
Of course, prefacing would say, this is by no means an insult or slight on anyone.
It's a good question. I think Sam, obvious Maverick.
Yes, definitely for sure.
For sure. I think Susan, maybe you didn't necessarily think Maverick,
but I think Susan brings Maverick energy.
Totally.
Julian is a Maverick.
I mean Julian has always been,
just does whatever he wants.
He's incredibly good at it,
but doesn't sort of play,
you know, he doesn't follow the rules
of what other people do.
He's always been a bit of a Maverick, I think.
Yes.
And Perkins is a maverick.
If you spend time with her.
Yeah.
Her brain is glorious, but there's stuff going on in there.
You know, I thought we were saying,
are we saying Beaumont is the non-maverick?
Oh no.
Oh no.
I think there might all be mavericks
by this definition.
Yeah, no, you're right.
I was gonna say Lucy is the kind of classic stand-up comedian
who does a bit of acting,
sort of fairly standard booking.
But yeah, in terms of bookings, yeah,
but I mean, in the way that they are on the show,
like Lucy, I think Lucy is a Maverick,
but she doesn't want to be a Maverick
because she loves following the rules.
She wants to get everything right.
Yes.
But she simply is physically encampable of doing that.
And also, you ask her a question and you end up somewhere completely different.
So she is a maverick as well, I would say.
Yeah, I can't argue with that.
I think you would be right.
I might be willing to take Julian's back.
Maybe he's not a maverick, he's just incredible.
He's just a legend.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I do feel like the casting on this series,
when I first saw it, I went, that's too many,
and it's like, it's like all the,
I don't know, it's like a sort of,
like a superhero movie where everyone's got a weird super power.
And none of them are just like quite fast
or quite good at fighting.
It's like everyone's got a niche power.
But in the world,
it's like, it's the X-Men, as opposed to Avengers Endgame.
Like there's, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Absolutely great.
It's the first time we've ever sort of categorized
the casting like an MCU film.
So I'm very happy about that.
Great, thank you.
Well, let's talk about Taskmaster, because, of course,
you're on the new series of Taskmaster. Very excited to see course, you're on the new series of Taskmaster.
Yes.
Very excited to see when you're announced for the new series of Taskmaster.
How did you feel when they asked you to do it?
When they asked me.
When they asked you.
Just saw dollar signs.
You get paid...
We've bleeped to the amount that Sam said there.
But yes, that is, I believe, how much.
So just the dollar signs?
Oh, yeah, and just to be part of, you know, a sort of, it's kind of, yeah, getting called
up to the big leagues, you know.
Yes.
I've been division two, I've been in the fucking two, and we're all in S for so long,
and they're like, yeah, you're ready.
We want to see you.
I'd imagine the producers of Australian Taskmaster were kicking themselves when you got...
I'm trying to do that one.
Are you going to try and do that one too?
Yeah.
Do you reckon that's going to work out?
They reckon, well, who knows?
Yeah.
They said it could be a go-up.
So you'll be the first contestant to cross the borders into another international version
of taskmaster.
Yeah.
That would be amazing, man.
It could upset people, it could delight people.
Yeah.
Did you have a good time doing taskmaster?
Yeah.
I think so.
Yeah. I'd seen a good time doing Taskmaster? Yeah. I think so. Yeah.
And you watched a lot of it before.
I'd seen a lot of Taskmaster Indonesia
and a lot of Taskmaster Czech Republic.
Yeah.
So yeah, hadn't seen the UK one, but I've
seen a lot of the other.
Who's your favorite contestant from Taskmaster Czech Republic?
That's a great question.
I like Leopold.
What?
What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
What?
What? What? What? What? What? What? What?
What? What?
What? What? What? What?
What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What? Oh. Oh. Oh. Why do you like Liverpool so much?
Oh, what he did with that long bit of piece of metal
was just amazing in that task.
Absolutely.
Millions of hits on YouTube.
So we're going to.
Or is I caught in the checker?
Oh.
Yeah, that's a whole you dug yourself
and then you just stated the whole.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Huge, exciting new cast.
What did you think when you heard about this new bunch when they were announced?
What were your first thoughts, either?
Well, I think one of the things that's so, I mean, firstly, I think it's a fantastic
cast.
I, you know, I think I wouldn't describe any taskmaster cast as being
anything other than a fantastic little people.
Obviously, the benefit of seeing them all
and enjoying them all, but even beforehand,
and they're already always for the S17,
you just can't wait to see how it works.
I have seen all five of them in at least a couple of things,
some I'm more familiar with than others.
But what is mad, I think, about the sort of almost like
arrogance of not learning from one's own experience,
is and also possibly the sort of infusion of bitterness
about them taking the mantle slash slash crown slash spoon is that
I looked at I went, he's a funny combination
as if like Eddie Tarswell's there before watching the series. So like said, as if you know,
boy, they'll declare Martinsmith Bino and Graham are like, well, I guess I would have been hanging out anyway.
Yeah, I think that's always the beauty of Taskmaster Lineups is that you could never imagine them hanging out together. They're not a gang, are they? But the key is they become a gang over the next
10 episodes. So I'm interested to see how all that works out. So I'll run through the lineup
quickly because we're obviously going to be talking about each one of them individually.
Of course we've got Julian Clarey, we've got Sam Campbell, we've got Lucy Bowman, we've got
Susan Wilkoma and we've got Superkins, what a lineup? Yes. I'd say more than more than ever maybe
this is this is a surprising gang though because Clarey very rarely see on anything
like a panel show, he doesn't really do stand-up anymore, he does a lot of brilliant things,
but he sort of feels almost like a legendary person who's now slightly outside the world
of live comedy, certainly. So to see him on this lineup is absolutely exciting and fantastic, and
he's brilliant on this first episode, and I can't wait to see what comes up in the next
ones. Perkins obviously always been comedy adjacent, herself started off in a comedy double
act with the wonderful male, but just great to see her in there. Campbell, now Campbell,
I think this is the one that most comedians were very excited about when he was announced. Yes, I'm almost loathed to add to the
calamity of comedian excitement around Sam Campbell, and obviously I've now watched this episode
and have to begrudgingly say that a tenth of the way in
he's already being ingenious and hilarious because he is a pretty phenomenal comic brain.
It's as someone who is quite broadly, I am now experimenting with my unworkable, unproducible sort of shot of jabes.
But fundamentally, I am a slow-moving vanilla act.
And when you've got genuine live wires in your industry,
it does make you feel very boring
when you're someone at the Edinburgh Fringe
and there's a constant, I was very lucky to get to do a couple of extra shows at the Pleasant's Grand this year,
which is a real like dream come true. Sam Campbell was using the Pleasant's Grand for a prank.
He was doing a show where he just did 10 minutes at the Grand and call it pull it through 10.
Yes, we're very excited to see him on this series. Wakoma, absolute legend Susan Wakoma,
I'd see him on this series, Wakoma, absolute legend, Susan Wakoma. One of the best comedy actors this country has ever seen, and she is a proper laugh.
So I'm really looking forward to seeing how she works out on the rest of the series.
And Beaumont, Beaumont for me, I don't really know Lucy that well.
We've gig together a few times.
We've not had the sort of pleasure of hanging out together too much.
But I think we'll
get into it in this episode. I think she set her stall out very early and I think she could
go down as one of the funniest taskmaster contestants ever. Well, that's, I mean, I think they're
all great and I think episode one down, well on course, but it's interesting to hear you go through it, almost surgically,
I would say it, and observing the back stories, and also the sort of gray areas as well, where like,
you've got, you're talking about Julian being like, a legend you might not have expected to see
on Tarsar, I say, when, you know, because there, there is usually a sort of a generational mix.
You sometimes hear like, I'm suddenly, I'm talking about like,
a generational mix. You sometimes hear like, I'm someone who spends a lot of time talking about like Fest music festival lineups and whether like certain bands who've been going for a while,
a better suited or artist, a better suited to like the Sunday often legend slot at class
pre or whether they're like an evening headline and actually which is better and how actually the
legend is obviously the most prized slot of the weekend. And similarly you've got that,
you've got some people where they're a bit more,
as you say, comedy adjacent, and you go,
oh, I didn't know whether you were a,
whether you were a new year's treat contenter,
you know, versus a sort of full series.
And then, you know, and then you've got Sam Campbell
where the question is, you know,
what does Taskmaster Australia feel about this?
Yes, well, I've spoken to Sam about that
and I think he is, he is gonna try and get on that as well.
Of course he is.
He's a cheeky little imp,
he wants to be the first person
to cross the international taskmaster boundary.
Oh, he'll probably borrow through the center of the earth
or something.
You know, Mark Silcox behind him with a head torch.
Yeah, I can see it.
How well did you know the show before you agreed to do it? Had you seen much taskmaster in the past?
Oh, I had, yeah. I've watched more series on O'Nourough, you know, yeah, no, I did, I loved it.
And I liked, you know, people that, like, you know, like John Kenz, for instance, like, you know,
me and you, like, we know John Kenz and we know like what an incredible sort of,
he's almost sort of slapstick comic, I think, isn't it?
But, you know, that's what's the exciting thing when you see something, you think, isn't it? But you know, that's what's the exciting thing when you see something. You see, are other people are going to know about, find out about this person?
Yes.
Which is lovely, because it does sort of unravel people, I think, if that makes sense.
Yeah, absolutely. And I definitely felt that way about your series with you and Sam,
in that I think everyone knows you're brilliant and you're finding more of an audience
and the sort of audience that are really going to enjoy you live as well.
Because I think the way you are on the show, if people come and see you live,
they're going to be like, this is brilliant, this is exactly what we'd hoped for.
Yeah, that would be nice.
Yeah, more weird audience members.
Well, in episode one, you said you're still out very early with the discussion about
your legs being like arms with feet on.
Which I totally stand by that.
I'm by that comment.
Yeah.
To the point that I did laugh at the Apollo the other night and I decided to crawl on
instead of walk because I thought people would be looking at my legs.
I didn't want to crawl.
How did they feel, how did the production team feel about that?
Did they know you were going to do that?
Well, we had to rehearse it because super nice.
I said, I'd like to crawl on and they said, well, we rehearsed it and that was very under
mat.
You know, coming on the obviously there's no applause.
There's just sort of middle-age techies looking at you.
Ha ha ha.
So hang on, I mean, look, we don't want to spoil
your lengthy follow-up here.
It's but I take it you then do talk about why you crawled on
as you're a bit.
Because obviously that hadn't really hit.
You know, I didn't know what to say.
So I just ignored the fact I had crawled on.
So I didn't start a discuss straight into the material.
Even better.
Welcome, John, to the Taskmaster podcast. Thank you for having me back, Ed.
Appreciate it. Well, it's lovely to have you back. It's always nice to have you on the Taskmaster
podcast. And you seem to, I mean, I don't know how much we talked about it on the last episode,
but your technical setup wasn't great last
time and I think you've really stepped that up so I want to congratulate you for that. Well the microphone
is now resting on my stomach, the laptop I can see you with, you know, racing green puff which is also on the setty. Yeah. I just moved house.
Yes, congratulations.
So I'm sat in my new living room and there's hummingbirds on the wallpaper.
She might kick us out in June.
I'm not interested.
Also, there was a roof, I was supposed to be coming around this morning.
And now he's coming tomorrow.
And I'm in Belfast tomorrow.
Right.
Well. But I did think, well, if he's a roof,
he can just go on the roof.
I don't have to be in.
That's a good point.
They don't need access to the interior
of the property today.
Belfast.
Yeah.
She said, oh, he can't landlord, can't come,
he can't come.
So I'm like, well, hang on.
Right. So when's he coming tomorrow?
I'm in Belfast tomorrow.
And there's a pause where you can feel we're both staring at each other and what's that?
She's looking at her WhatsApp, I'm looking at her, my WhatsApp.
And we're both thinking, hmm, I guess he could just go on the roof.
The problem is if he fell off on the other side of the house, he stuck then.
Yeah, well, and injured, I don't know.
Well, yeah, he's thinking he'll fall off and it'll be absolutely fine and he's just stuck and that's the main problem.
If he fell off on the front side, that's also an issue.
That's not my issue, though.
Yeah, but if you were in, at least you'd see him go past the window and you could call the ambulance.
Well, he was, I mean, he was supposed to be up there now as I'm talking to you. Yeah. And then I did think, I was like, well, that should be fine. This shouldn't be much noise. You know,
I can still do this. I did think though, imagine I'm recorded talking to you. And then,
you know, we're about five minutes from the end of the pod. I seem flying down the window, ladder goes, hello eight.
Let's just quickly get through Superkins dancing around.
Can't be the first roof he's fallen off.
Yeah, they must learn the fall like Buster Keaton.
And they must do.
Or like wrestlers, there's a way, there's a way of falling. Surely.
Yeah. Surely. Roof 101. Here's your ladder. And if you want to go up there.
Yeah. Now what do you do when you're up there? Well whatever job I need to take the ladder
away from the legs. Watch the guy drop and then go right
Roll and repeat roll and repeat you put down soft soft play mats
Anyways not coming he's coming tomorrow, but I don't have he's coming tomorrow anyway. I moved the setup's good
I watched I watched the episode today
There was a bit that I have to be honest now, there was a
point during the show when my iPad was next to the kettle and the kettle was making a lot of noise
and I think it really had just the volume on the iPad. Okay, so there's a bit that you haven't heard
essentially. So, well, throughout this pod, if I kind of blank you imagine in my mind I'm just here in a
kill. Okay that's good to know that's good to know going in if if anything what
we could do if post yeah if Daisy doesn't mind doing that if we edit the
sound of a cat Lynn when you're blanking.
It would be great. I went to watch a cricket game with John Kerns, early this summer, and I wanted to take
a wooden spoon to get a photograph of him passing
me the wooden spoon. The reasons this fell down were twofold. Number one, though John
Petigui earlier on in his series was very much playing that role. I think he came sort
of equal, last or equal fourth, he might even say, with Furn. And I think there was a lot
more dignity to it than mine where Jack Bernhardt made one of those graphs of people's position
over time on Tarsmas. And at one point, I just disappear off the graph.
That is a claim to fame in itself. You've at least done something remarkable
in the history of Taskmaster.
I've gone off graph.
You could chat maybe, I've expanded the axes
to keep me in view, who's to say.
But so, never so, I thought John might not appreciate
being sort of called the wooden spooner of S14.
And also, what are the good people that Lord's going to say? Don't mind me in my spoon. I'm just under relentless
unphana-stalgic content. This you are either, this is what strikes me about
you, I've never known anyone to invest so much time and effort into something
like that. To be like, I'm going to get a wooden spoon spoon, we're gonna make this work, we have to get this photo.
And you will be, I know you would have been thinking
about that for days beforehand, right?
At the expense of quite a lot of professional projects.
Um, so, I mean, you say get wooden spoon.
I mean, I, I've got wooden spoons.
Yes.
That was the simplest part of the operation.
If anything, and one I'd be happy to have had confiscated,
at the case of Lord, assuming I've got my photograph in.
I think a photograph of me and John having power,
brackets, my wooden spoon confiscated.
You know, in many ways, that's the content
that I should have chased.
Tell me this way, where you focused on pleasing the master.
Certainly, I don't feel like you're focused on pleasing Alex a lot of the time.
Well, what happened with Alex?
It's a sort of comedic device, isn't it?
And I've always done this, whether I've got a dog on stage with me or a pianist or a lesbian
in the wings or a man in the front row, I have to have someone
I'm afraid to put down as it were and be rude to. And Alex was the only one there,
part from a cameraman, so he got the job. And it took us a while to kind of work out
the dynamics of that. But once he understood his place, then he played along.
I think he's the perfect foil for that sort of stuff
because he gets it in the studio from Greg.
And that's...
Yes, he does a similar thing with Greg, doesn't he?
Although it's more complicated because he's actually
the clever one in the studio, but yes,
he's used to that role, I feel.
So you could almost see him when he was in the house with you, because
I think sometimes being in the house with the contestants is a nice holiday for him
that relationship with Greg, but you absolutely gave him a very short shrift and we loved it.
He's got a twinkling his eyes well, so much like, finally, the wonder dog used to have in it only my fan. Absolutely.
This lineup in particular has a real breadth of personality types. Would you say that's the case?
Yeah, did you bond with your with your group? Yes, very much so. You did, yeah.
Very well, yeah. Yeah, we've not met ups, but we stayed in touch very WhatsApp,
which is a play.
I think particularly, and I said that I had you on my radio show the other day,
and I said this to you then, but the particular pairing of you and Sam together,
because you both have such individual viewpoints,
and the fact you were sat together sort of focused it as well
You seem to really you seem to really click with each other
Yeah, did he was like I do it for that, but he was like if you'd a told me yeah, that my mum met an arch Australia
Good well happened
He's got very strong little brother energy, I think Sam anyway,
because he's like cheeky and very charming and naughty. He's got proper little brother vibes.
Yeah, and you wouldn't know how old you know what he did in David's room was,
when we met, yes, because he's so positive about everything. He asked me where I was from,
and I said, oh, from the North East.
And he said, oh, and I said, it's on the coast.
And he said, as it's the North Sea.
And he was like, oh wow, you grew up near the ocean.
And I was like, oh, yeah.
And he was like, did you spend a lot of time on the beach?
Has that, sometimes if you wanted to spot a dead body,
you know, it would go on the shingle beach,
but it would just have to just love that I thought the Nazi was an ocean.
Yeah, it's very, a very Australian assumption that that if you grow up near the coast,
that you spent a lot of time on the beach, whereas the actual Northeast coastline is,
is, oh, it's, it's torrid, isn't it? It can be it's dramatic.
Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes.
Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining.
A woman planting her course to free to pat in love for.
It's non-stop bonkers brilliance.
I love that.
Four things.
It's like theaters, December 15th.
MUSIC
MUSIC
Today's episode of the Taskmaster podcast is sponsored by
Kozy.
Who are Kozy I can hear you asking?
Well, Kozy are a Canadian furniture company
that creates thoughtfully designed furniture made for modern living.
I actually think they should
maybe get some cozy furniture in the taskmaster house because look it looks lovely in there,
but let me tell you it's not built for comfort. Some of the furniture in there has been battered
over series and series of multiple messy and disgusting tasks and I think it's about time they
gave the place a spruce up and cozy, it's the way they can do that because
it is incredibly thoughtfully designed furniture made for modern living. It allows owners
to easily elevate any space and I'm talking to you, Tarsmaster, that sounds like the perfect
way to improve your house. They are modular sofas, you can choose the design you like, configure
the shape and number of seats for your space and pick your favourite fabric and you can choose the design you like, configure the shape and number of seats for your space, and pick your favourite fabric. And you can add modules over time if your needs change.
I mean, think about that, the lab, it's a very bare, white place, isn't it? Maybe a pop of colour
in there with a colourful fabric on a cozy sofa for when people are feeling a bit stressed during
the task, they can have a little lie down. And And we need new shelving space in the taskmaster house.
Kozy is launched new solid wood modular shelving systems, the altitude collection.
It's super easy to assemble, you could even do it as a task, get the contestants to do
it, and the installation can be done on any wall in a couple of minutes.
And let me tell you the customer experience at Kozy a second to none.
There's free and fast shipping on all orders, and there's over 3,500 five star reviews.
You get a five year warranty and a 30 day risk free trial.
And if you need to speak to someone about something, the customer support is actually human.
You don't find that very often these days.
Transform your living space today with Kozi. Visit kozi.ca.ca.c-o-z-e-y.ca to
start customising your furniture. It is unbelievably joyful and silly. That's the point. The whole
team told you that. They go, we're not here to like embarrass you or humiliate you, the point is to make you laugh and I'm an easy audience member,
so they were delights. Great, had you seen much of the show before you signed up?
Yes, yeah, well I mean I've got tons of friends who've been on the show and I kind of,
well I'm not a comedian or anything, but kind of the closest person to me is Daisy May Cooper,
because we went to drama school together.
So we've had the kind of same route into television and comedy.
So she was the one that I really picked her brain about it.
But yeah, now I've seen all the series,
and of course, I'm laughing. I'm going,
if I was doing it, I'd do it like this.
I do it like this, you silly Billy.
And then I'm there just, just do it like this, I do it like this, you silly Billy. And then I'm there
just just messing it out me wonderfully. But no, no big fan. So when the offer came in,
I was like, I don't feel like I don't feel like I should and therefore I must.
Yes, absolutely. Did Daisy give you any specific advice that you can remember that you took
into your time on Towsmaster? Um? She genuinely, my main concern was that,
because I'm not a stand-up, and I didn't want to do anything
where I had anything prepared, or trying to come up
with any equips or anything like that.
And she was just like, that's the thing that you just
react to things, just be present.
I know you can do that.
So that was the main thing that I think her and their respect
to Moan and their respect to Ashley and as well, just coming from that
standpoint of like, I don't want to come in with anything prepared.
I don't think you can to a certain degree for really good at
like crowd work, audience work and all of that, but I just
decided that I was going to just enjoy myself.
Yeah, that's absolutely the best way to do it.
And I think because of that, I often,
I do enjoy people who've come from the world of acting
for that specific reason.
Well, seeing us look absolutely baffled
and a little bit embarrassed and scared
that we've lost our careers.
Obviously, obviously that's a real highlight for me.
But also just that with comedians like stand-ups, you often see their
personality because they're trying to show what they're genuinely like on stage. That's
like the main aim with a lot of comics, whereas obviously you guys are paid to portray
a different personality. We don't want to see us. Oh, is that you? Put that away. We're
constantly being other people.
But that's what I wanted to do it,
because I could just turn up and sit down
and have a laugh and enjoy myself, which is so great.
And also, the series that I think are really successful
are the ones where you have really different personalities.
And you have people who bring different things to the table. And I think that our who bring, you know, different things to the table. And I think
that our cast is, you know, I don't want to blame on Trump, but I think that we're quite brilliant
at that that was so different. You've got sort of Sam and Lucy who are vying for people who should
be arrested really. They're vying, they're vying in their own different ways. And then you've got Sue who's just an absolute joy and really, really smart.
But you could see her allowing herself to get kind of thrown by some of the tasks.
She's brilliant and then she absolutely egg some of them and then you just got to, you
just got to and you just has this wonderful hate for Alex, which I just like a highlight
for me.
He really, Julian took every task and his stride.
He seemed gently annoyed by the whole thing.
Yeah, just gently.
Just gently annoyed.
Always annoyed.
Pretty. They deliberately don't want you to understand things going on around you and you're wonderful
when you don't understand the things. I mean, I think you call Alex all sorts of names
under the sun in episode one, even. You're absolutely giving it to him both barrels.
There's not enough barrels for Alex. He, there's not, and he, the thing is he loves it as well.
If you call him an anus or something, you can just see the,
the list of smiles start to creep around his face.
You know, he loves it.
He loves to be treated mainly.
Well, between you and Julian, the series, he gets plenty of mean
treatment, I think.
And he gets, I love him. And yes, I love him. No, because he's always, there's, there's mixery, the series, he gets plenty of mean treatment, I think. And he gets, I love him. And yet I love him.
No, because he's always there's, there's mixery, which I, like, you know, when you get a task, you know, you just want to, you have an idea of what you're going to try and do.
And there's, he's always tried to stime it in a very subtle way.
And whatever the level, the playing, the opposite of level, the play, make the playing field as uneven as possible.
There's even more of that this series, I think. I'm thinking particularly about the golf ball in the golf hole task where he was standing on the whole to obscure it from you.
I believe that's where you brought out the deployed the anus, I mean, I usually deploy it in those sorts of situations where someone's deliberately obscuring a spherical object.
So, but I spent about 40 minutes roaming around with the Getty Estates, because that was filmed at the old John Paul Getty Estates.
Oh, wow.
It's an extraordinary place. So this sort of billionaire kind of bought up most of Oxfordshire, gated it and then has got sort of an opera venue and a sort of replica of
lords. And anyway, we were we were within the and I just wandered freely throughout
and then came back after about 45 minutes.
And then he just moved and I could see it and I'm like, just as spies you,
I despise you.
And I played the pamphlets from off an hour, which is a good thing, because it's not my forte.
Your energy on the show is quite incredible. You seem to slip into different modes,
depending on the task. I'm thinking, of course, of the army general. The army
generals made quite a few appearances. Yes. Didn't know that was in me, really. I don't normally have that pluck.
Yes, Army General, but it's sort of quite dad's Army
in terms of the Army with Cluster.
Yeah.
A shouting and briskness, but incompetency,
backed by pure incompetency, I'd say.
I mean, I didn't need to ask you whether you'd see much taskmaster before, because the sword
in the stone task, I think, highlighted that where you had to try and guess the code word
and the code word was waddicum and you were the only one who found the picture of Joshua
Waddicum and even that wasn't enough of the clue for quite a long time.
Not for me, no, I'm not very good with names to begin with. I'm not very good with other
comics because I don't really watch them, but I'd sort of vaguely seen him on panel shows.
I did get it in the end, didn't I?
Yes, you did get it in there.
And you won, you won that task, but it's amazing.
Yes.
It was that awkward moment where you were trying to remember
his name, and everyone was just sort of gripping the arms
in their chair going, if he can't come up with it,
it's going to be absolutely, what, incredible.
I would have loved it.
Excruciating, yes.
It was in my brain somewhere it was in my brain, so
might have also that man with a teeth, whose name I still can't remember.
Who's he? It's Rob Beckett, is the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the,
it's, you see, I'm not very good with blokey blokes. Yeah. If you'd had,
Larry Grayson up there, I've got a renowned homosexual of some sort, I'd
have been in like Flynn, but these, these blocs
authentically say over, marvelous, there they are.
No, that's fair enough. And there was a picture of me in there as well, Julian, because I won
the series 9, so you didn't, you didn't even try and guess mine. Now I thought you were
some sort of runner.
We should also briefly talk about your nicknames. You went with the nickname Butch and then
broke the table. But the initial suggestion was that your nickname in the past has been
fuck pig.
Yeah, that's right, it was. It's a terrible story and it's hard to explain to people without
it seeming like something it wasn't. But back in the 70s I was a coxwain for Kingston
Rang Club, so I was only about 12 and they were all these lads, you know, and it was quite
character building for me to be in, because the coxwains in charge of them all, and shouts
orders and all that. Their joke was to call me fuck pick. I didn't really understand it at the time, but what can I say?
It was true, so that's why I put it in.
Good, I'm glad we got the exclusive on where fuckpig comes from. But if you said it in
the studio, you'll be surprised they hear that they lost it from the edit julien, they
just left in fuckpig as a reference. I know, I think I might have harvested it well aware that this was never going to see the
night of day. I didn't know on podcast one could talk about such things.
Absolutely. I have to say it was all fun at the rowing club and I wasn't actually a
fuck pig.
Good, I can't believe we can draw a line under it, finally.
Oh well, I'll just say it. I'll say it now and then I'll say it again.
Yeah, go on.
Judy Clarison Millionaire. I love watching Millionaires do this shot.
Absolutely love it.
Because what they're just getting nice things from their house as the prize
task, is that is that why or just the general vibe of it.
Just a vibe, man.
Also, his jacket, I'm gonna say it's from Wax.
He's got a lot of stuff from Wax.
He's very, very well dressed in this series,
but yeah, I think he's in some universal Wax.
I've been tempted by Wax.
It's a good, it's a good place.
It's a good place.
It's a good place.
Yeah, yeah, it is, yeah.
They do nice stuff.
It's on my algorithm a lot. a good mess. It's a good mess. It's a good mess. It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess. It's a good mess.
It's a good mess.
It's a good mess. It's a good mess. It's a good mess. It's a good mess. It's a good mess. It's a good mess. Yeah, it looks fantastic. I'm gonna look it up. This day and age, two seconds.
He's 64, man.
I would have said late 40s, early 50s, you know.
He looks good for that.
He does the play, you're every Christmas.
Oh, yeah.
He's a plan.
Well, not always be a plan, is it?
They switch it up.
No, do they? Now, John, I want you always Peter Pan, is it? They switch it up. No, do they?
Now, John, I want you to take this as a compliment.
I could see you in the play, Dean Panto.
Ed, I'd love to do that.
I know you would, because people talk,
they get, oh, John does like weird stand-up comedy.
But you go, no, John's old school, man.
John's old school.
I'm not weird, man. John's more, John's John's old school man John's old school. I'm not weird man. John's more can John's more come on wise
Hey, hey
Come on now you've got contacts
I'd love imagined and right is here's why we're going we're going on a bit of a tangent
I think this is where people this is
This is where people listening can put
This is where people listen to good book.
Here's the thing, right? Other than enough podcasts with people,
because I listen to some weird podcasts with proper old school people.
Yeah.
There's a podcast called, I'll find it in a bit.
Anyway, look, you're it a play for three months,
not by two months. November, and in November, December, January. You're in the palladium.
It's a stone's throw for Oxford Circus tube. You've got a couple of weeks rehearsals,
everyone's pissing themselves off and you go to the pub. Then there's a bit of a serious week
when everyone goes, all right, let's get it nailed. But you're surrounded by pros.
You're in central London every night at Christmas.
I'm not saying it's not hard work,
but I would sign me up.
What would you do?
What's the dream role for you in the play, Dean Pantone?
I do anything.
You know, in asterix, when when that guy he only turns up on the last
panel when he stuck up a tree he's some reason he tied up in a tree remember
that guy I'll say I do John that we someone listen to those I mean they haven't
done an asterix pot they haven't done an asterisk pot. They haven't done an asterisk panther, so maybe not that,
but my point being, I do, I mean, I do editing.
I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do,
I've played hook and beat it, man.
Wow.
How still the night is.
Nothing sounds alive.
Now is the hour when the children are in their beds, their lips bright brown
with the good night chocolate. Their tongues drowsily searching for the belated crumbs housed
insecurely in their shining cheeks. That's when he's walking around and they're all asleep
on the deck.
I'm not sure that'd fly in the play in Panto, to be honest mate.
Well, yeah, I mean, that'll probably be to say something about that.
Out of context, that clip, that clip's pretty bad, but you know, I'm...
It's beautiful, it's beautifully performed, but I'm just imagining that of the Panto,
especially near a Christmas when there's loads of kids in, I don't think they're gonna...
It was HUC!
Yeah, I know it's HUC.
Well, they're supposed to be scared of him.
But that wasn't scary, that was beautiful.
But they're not, you know, they want to be booing and stuff.
They don't know how to boo that.
I don't know, I've got my ass out, I don't know.
LAUGHTER
That's how it works.
Now it works.
Now it works.
Cool, that was beautiful. Look down.
Oh, there.
Boo!
LAUGHTER Boo! Go that was beautiful look down Oh there Boo Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You're right. Boo, we're boogier ass. Why are you boogin'? Just tell me it's out.
Boo. God.
When I saw the lineup announced, I was like,
Oh, yeah, I had a...
I've not thought about these people in the same day together.
Like, to see them all together is gonna be absolutely crazy.
So, but also you say that about Lucy and Sam,
and I think I've said this on the podcast before.
I think they're so, like Sam is willfully odd.
Lucy is just from another planet.
But I think them together,
quite often, slightly overshadows the thing
that I wanna talk about is that you're quite wit. I'm think, but some of the choices you've...
I've been busted. Yeah, I am a little bit. I'm thinking of, I mean, I think the real,
the highlight for me so far is, is chain bastard. Because of all the things that you could have
picked, it's often people's first thought,
you're like, wow, what's going on in their mind?
You had to pick a nickname, do something,
and then pick it in their based on that,
and you went with chainbusters,
where chain dialects up and started tickling with feathers.
Where did, what part of your psyche
did chainbusters come from, Susan?
They don't know.
I remember when I brought it up the whole team just cracked
up. I was like, what? It's what you'd call someone who's very scary, right? No, it's not the
first thing. I think I don't know. What? Okay. Well, in my defense, what happens, right?
When you're doing the task days, is that you're doing about 10 in a day. You do like 10 different tasks for five, six days.
And so for my brain, about task three, I start slowly losing my mind and just coming up with
rubbish. So when chain bars, I was like, yeah, just really want to use a chain, you're a bastard,
stick together, let's go. And the thing is, as well, that team
facilitate that kind of behaviour.
No one's going, this will be on television forever.
No one's going, merge, you want to think about that?
They're like, yeah, yeah.
And what else is in your weird mind?
You're just dragging, shit out,
just dragging it out, and giving it to people.
But yeah, not...
Well, also, yeah, I mean, on that,
your make a sausage task. and give it to people. But yeah, not. Well, also, yeah, I mean, on that,
you'll make a sausage task.
Again, classic example of when it's set in,
I wasn't well.
LAUGHTER
Putting whatever, I mean, whatever you made,
it wasn't a sausage, was it?
I wasn't.
I wasn't a bed of underwear.
Nickers, frillinickers.
Yeah, it was.
Yeah.
I'm making Alex lick those nickers. Yeah.
Do you see that's where my mind went first. They said, okay, you've got to do some sausages.
And in my head, I think I was like, honestly, Alex, lick some nickers. Yeah. Just. How
do I facilitate that? I was like, mocks and sausages. Just put it on some nickers and put
some glitter on it. It's an edible glitter and I was like, look that, lick it.
It was, it was nice if you speak edible glitter to be honest.
I think I could have just made a meat toxic glitter.
And the thing is he would have as well, because he's a weird.
Yeah, nearly anything that guy.
I do also, before we move on to talking about episode six, specifically, and I said this on the podcast,
I, I think that you're making mischief tasks
where you created a whole different task for Sam
is a highlight of all of Taskmaster ever for me.
I think it's an excellent stroke of genius.
Yes.
That was a point where my brain was activated.
That was earning the day, yeah.
That was before 12.
No, I really, that was so fun because making mischief, I love pranks and I love doing
that sort of thing.
So the opportunity to do that and to do, and I'd never met also the kind of beauty of
it is that it was Sam, because I'd never met Sam before.
And then over the course of kind of the studio going oh my god it pranks out. This is
Brilliant was was a highlight for me that was that's closer to who the girl I know yes, the closest girl very very fun
pre-12 o'clock pre-known
Now we um we interviewed Julian last week and we were talking about your sausages. The sausages
you had to make. Yes. They went down very well in the studio. You got the five points.
There was some consternation in the chat last week about your sausages. Me and Julian
both agree that what you apparently
invented and should be sold in shops are fish cakes. Now I'm going to break this down.
I made two sausages and I'm going to give it to you that one of them was a
fish cake because it was fried. I mean, admittedly in a sausage you shape.
Yeah. And of course that's a whole other discussion. What is a sausage? Is it
just something served in a long spherical tube?
But anyway shape
One was fried and I'll give you that and I sense Julian. I've never seen Julian's angry. I'm like chill out
There was one that I did in a very chefy way, which was like a pate that I
Basically, you'll know what's that posh sausage you make with cling film.
But a b is with a b. Oh, no, I shouldn't. You know the one I mean. I know the one you mean.
Yeah. It'll come to me later. Yeah. So you roll it in cling film and then I poached it.
Wow. So because they didn't show the process. Oh, let me take you through the process.
I blitzed with whatever, there was a, like a neutral bullets.
And can I tell you that the nutrients aren't designed for a heavy
shift?
That got jammed into a paste, a like which I don't want to ever see again.
So I put, I put some smoke salmon, bits and gobs, some white fish,
bits and bobs, some white fish,
and stuff, egg. And then, yeah, I rolled it in cling film
until it made a sausage shape,
but it was all kind of tightly done.
And then I poached it for about, I don't know, five minutes.
And that came out as a pure sausage.
So, I think Julian's better than that,
as all I'm saying. I was, as I say,'s better than that, as all I'll say.
I was gonna say, I've said to Grumbling,
and I'm like, cat mad in love,
because you're a gentleman,
you don't need to behave like that.
He obviously didn't say anything in the studio,
but what he did is he saved it up,
he saved it up, deep down in his stomach
until he came on the taskmaster podcast,
and then as soon as that task came up,
he just went for the jugular.
Yeah, he did, he did, he were rumbling to the studio. I did hear him, I simply didn't
just fish cake, and I thought, right, we'll have this all won't, right? And also, especially
in the context of what we now know in episode five, where I'd take an absolute solid hit
for the man. So I want the history books to show that not only is I've banned Maria sausage
in Tim film. Yeah. Let's leave the other one which was
painting me a weird chick fish cake. But I brought him point home. So yeah, I mean it's
uncommonly if you have carried on in this man. Well, we'll discuss the taking the hit
for him at the end because I don't think you did it on purpose. Okay, the... I'm dead, you!
Question myself, is this?
But...
...
Now, obviously, you're in a household with John Richardson,
who was on Series 2 of Taskmaster.
Did he give you any tips going into your experience?
Um, yeah, but I don't like taking tips from John.
But yeah, I mean, he's still, if anyone remembers that, he still bears a grudge because there's
points for rabbit thing we're covering right in that he should have worn really.
And he was genuine upset.
So it was triggering for him when I said I was going to be involved in
Tasmastic because he doesn't have a good word to say about the program
Yeah, he's never been on this podcast so that probably speaks to the truth somewhat exactly
It does like you where he's gonna not got a problem with you. Oh good glad to glad to hear it's just the machine
Yeah, the machine
It's just the machine, it's the machine.
Yeah, there are enough there enough.
There was an amazing moment in episode one with the getting the duck into the lake task where Sue stretched the rules a little bit and you know,
she moved everything in advance and widened the course.
And it your reaction to it, it was like the first time you realized that you
could sort of find workarounds in the task.
You were absolutely horrified that Sue had bent the rules.
I was, I mean, I love Sue. I mean, I thought she was just incredible.
She had that sort of like, do you remember the famous five? It was like famous five energy, you know, like you're in your belly like, let's get this done and she was so sprightly, I don't know how because we filmed those in January and
like we had to turn up at like six o'clock in the morning and I don't know if she was on something If I'm just like, but she, but it did it. Well, I renaed you bothered me and and but I did
I was really surprised. I just wondered, you know, is it because she's more fit in the
same me that she's going to be allowed to? I felt like there was something else that plays. Well, are they going to add a trust Greg, obviously, who would
trust that beast of a man? That's what all the sort of grim tails were about to warn you
about men like Greg, red-briding hood and stuff. So I just was worried, is he going to
start giving points to people for different things when they're cheated?
I wanted to do it straight down the line.
What I'm saying is Sue did not cheat in that. She read the task and she spotted what she could
do that was not mentioned on the task. I think she cheated.
But then also you backed up your argument by saying no one's telling you to not go at 90 on the motorway,
but they are, they are telling you to not go at 90 on the motorway because the limit is 70, right?
Well, 70, but that's, it's very brief, isn't it?
It doesn't, if you're any of the, so you would prefer, you would prefer it said you can go at 70, you can go below that,
but you can't go 80, 90, 100, 110, you need a full list of speeds that you can't go
at.
Well, it doesn't say don't, which I think is why I do this.
It does.
Which is what I'm looking at.
No, it rises 70, doesn't it?
It's the law.
You got to go 70 or below.
You can't break 70. That's
what that means. That's the same as saying you can't go at 90. But why do cars, why
do they make cars that go 100 and? Well, look, that I can't answer. I completely agree
with that. If there's going to be a speed limit, then you shouldn't make cars that can
go over that. But that's for me. I think she bent the rules. She bent the rules exactly
but she didn't write them.
And that sometimes part of Tarsamasti, you know, you can find workarounds, you can find little hacks,
but I do respect you as well for wanting to play it straight down the line. Do you want to see what the world is really like?
Yes.
Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining.
A woman planting her course to free to pat in love for.
It's non-stop bonkers brilliance.
I love that.
Four things.
It's like theaters, December 15th.
It's non-stop bonkers brilliance.
I love that.
Poor things.
It's like theaters, December 15th.