Tell Em Steve-Dave - #369: Angel Coitus

Episode Date: April 10, 2018

A 13%er who narrowly escaped the clutches of a deranged cult leader stops by. Is heaven just one big friend zone? Git ‘Em and Walt dish on their exclusive book club. Music: Medicated Savage - Be Original

I don't want to evolve past the blowjob. I don't want to. I greet my greasy disgusting mother who's born to do. You're an alcoholic. I'm a welcome guest this week. Very rare that we have a guest on Tellum Steve Dave. But this is some interesting shit. And long time listener, Kim, can I give you a real name? Yeah, that's fine. Kim.com will call you. And you have a harrowing story that's fit for like a lifetime movie, right?

Do you know what I? I'm sure. Let's go with yes. I've long dreamed of... You want to keep your wife in line, bro? I have to apologize. I've never seen a wink a weaker pip-pim-pan on my life. I've never seen a wink a weakerip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life

I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life

I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip him hand on my life I've never seen a wink a weaker pipip hand on hand on my life I've never I'm going to go all the way to Staten Island and pick. So I've long dreamed of being part of a cult and by part of a cult. I mean, leader of a cult. Yeah, I was thought that you had the...

Anybody I knew? You had that mojo, that special ability, forget what it's called, the Sven Goole. Yeah, a little Sven Goole. I'm like a fucking 90-year-old horror movie host. What's it called? Sven Goole. It's a Bengali film. Well, we're going to ask an expert who is part of a cult from the time you were born until like a couple weeks ago, right? Until I was 24, so about four years.

So you haven't been in there for four years? Right. Okay. So this was a religious cult as most of them are, right? What's your favorite cult? Well, Blue Wester. Mm-hmm. Godzilla.

Nice. You know? Blue Wester cult, you like? Nice. Okay. The Barry Shriners, maybe? The Shriners are those guys the guys who shaved their heads and they got an adorable little blanket yeah that's where all I guess yeah all the Shriners were right what are you talking about that you know the moonies

all the moonies the moonies they're fucking pretty annoying but in the city's, you have always banging the fucking tambourines and shit. What do they have? They have an interesting aroma too. Musky. But you are a part of this and I'm assuming your parents are in it? Yeah, my mom, not my dad. Not your dad. So your mom was in it and did they stay together? Was it like, were they together? Is that why your dad wasn't part of it? My, no, they're together, but my dad was always like pushing us into it, but he didn't wanna go. He likes to, he likes to believe that he's religious, but not that he has to do anything about it.

Ooh. So like, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. I can identify, I love to hear. You love to sack the monies in the hall. I love to hear you love the sanctimonious of the whole I love to hear like my wife and my goters are like they're going to church and they're and I like I drew to them I was out drawn to late last night. I can't go and I hear the Corage door go and they're going and I'm like that makes me feel good inside I don't know the bed right away Makes you feel good. Yeah, that they're going, you know, and I feel like you know

I'll just hang out here with my God-given talent. I get some contact, some contact grace, you know, for really, I'll be in, you know. So your cathedral is your home and being alone without anyone else there, because I fucking, I hear you. No, I'm just saying, I can understand like, like, you know, what you're saying about, you know,

I think that's a lot of people in this country who probably have that mindset about religion. Religion? Religion? Religion is not even at that. So, yeah, so Saturday it works. Yeah, so your dad didn't really want a part of it and you guys, do you have any brothers or sisters or just you? I have a brother, but he wasn't, he's much older than me, so he was out of the house by the time.

I was not indoctrinated into it at birth. It was more like 10-11 10-11 Mr Know was your mom a part of it for the first 10-11 years. No, I brought her into it. So you're the wacko. I am I So a 10-11 you had friends or something that I did church like I want to be a part of that All right. Well, this is why you should let kids make all the decisions. It's legislative to fucking the loss of this country.

Because they make decisions like, I want to join a cult with my friends. Yeah, but it was their parents who made the decisions. You made the suggestion. A quick aside, can you, you people who go to protests? It's a great American institution, the protest. Stop writing what you fucking think are clever signs for your kids to hold It's so fucking irritating. We all know your kids aren't that clever and that's the message that you want to get across And you're using your kid is a pawn to get the fucking message. They're doing it. They're doing it enough with the attention

Enough with the fuck yeah, you're giving me a little go viral. I know and you're giving me the attention Maybe you don't get a bunch of views fucking idiots. Okay, go on What's that you hope I carry remember what it said? I just saw a little kid holding it like I was at a gun rail and he's like I thought you were pro life. I guess it's aimed at Trump. Okay And it's just like I know that the kids like fucking seven I know he didn't make the sign so don't make him hold it. It's worse than having a dog fucking do a Hitler What was the name of your cult? If you're a lie, lie to say it,

are you in hiding at this point? No, I'm not in hiding. It's, it's um... Branch Nivideans. No, it's like a sect, it's a sect removed from like, Evangelicism, so Evangelicals, do you, anybody know what that is? I've heard of it, but I'm not super familiar with it.

Do they like, do they kiss snakes and stuff? No, no evangelicals. We like would go out That tragic snake I really love the kiss of black mama You're the spirit I'm not talking about the many other healers. Okay, so what is an event? Evangelicals are like super loud. They believe that like you can be filled with the spirit and you can go out and like hands and heal people like past and dead and that like you you are your job in life yeah is to go out

and get people to believe I think Tibo is an evangelical it's called a scam he's into your most is he like the Tom Cruise of your probably probably I think a lot of like you guys put a Tibobo on a on a pedestal. He was definitely beloved He was definitely beloved. I When we were at the pinball event this this weekend, I'm not gonna go into the story about how it took four hours to get pieces Eventually I was in a huge room. We're hanging out eventually. I just left because Dan Willis Yeah, we're just gonna leave it. I'm watching TV and there's this TV Evangelical preacher Yeah, we were just gonna leave it. I'm watching TV and there's this TV evangelical preacher

I just a key life It's a local affiliate type thing I tried to cue I said turn on channel 24 a tip now to keep his I've been watching for 10 I've been watching the 10 guys insane. He's just fucking screaming and like carrying on the whole time. Yeah, it was Without There is Start with prayer so I don even want to say anything else. I want to start with prayer right now. Many of you are sick in your body

and this is holy week and I want to pray for you first before I say anything to you. Because I know you're wondering the entire time it was. So that's why he's... He's spent 25 minutes delivering the same one sentence summation of his, it was crazy. It was really, but you can't not watch it. It was fascinating, but it was kind of the message was kind of delivered in the first sentence. Yeah.

And then the rest is carrying on. That's how most evangelical, it's, it's all about spinning it. And by the way, you do kind of lead your own cult. But, um, it's a scam. It's a scam. Oh, absolutely. It's a scam. Oh, absolutely, it's a scam. You buy into it, you give them money

to build churches in other countries. And there always seem to be these miracles that happen in other countries, like preachers, I'm sorry, missionaries would come back from other countries with pictures. And oh, you can see the Holy Spirit in this picture look and it's just like the film is fucking out. Slow down a whole lot of writing this out.

You said you guys can heal other people right? Did you guys not did you guys were not allowed to go to see real doctors in? It was highly highly discouraged that you see doctors. Can someone help me with his male irritability ? I mean like there was it was have you ever heard like worship music? Yeah yeah like they would bring in people that are faith healers. What? Oh, the band striper. Did they reply?

Worship music? I don't know. I don't know what that is. Christian Metalman? I don't know. I don't know. You're not into anything's Christian Metal at all. I wasn't around for the eight years.

Yes. Amy. She's still popular. She will forever be popular. She's like the Amy Winehouse. Yeah. Maybe the Britney Spears, let's say, or the Katy Perry of like Christian. But so there was this thing you would sing at church and you would raise your hands because you're closer to God if you raise your hands. So you were kind of doing a Hitler slew. A double Hitler slew. Yeah, a double Hitler slew,

which I used to teach my dog to do this. So he kind kind of doing a Hitler slew. A couple inches, a double Hitler slew. Yeah, a double Hitler slew, which I used to teach my dog to do this, but this one tall, so he kinda looked like he was doing that. But yeah, it was all about raising hands and being closer to God and singing and- What makes it a cult? I'm not sure what makes it a cult. So far it just sounds like a regular thing.

Did you live on a compound? No, but every day of the week, there's schedule. You do things with members of the group. Every day, one day a week, so those six days, the cult is kind of like, do your own thing? No, no, no, every day. Oh, every day of the week. Yes, Friday's you have home group,

and then some days you're making food for the homeless, some days you're, it's a lot of like, it's a lot of work, it's hard work. Yeah, it's nice some of the forks nice, but it's. What's the worst activity? Knocked on to the doctor when you're sick. I mean, yeah, that's not great. They're, well, we would do baptisms, of course.

Okay. And we all had matching outfits. You mean like baptisms like you was in a normal church? We would go to this campsite every year to do these baptisms, and we would just be together for a week and just singing around a fire. Oh yeah, it's great. Yeah. Was that part, it's heavy. Yeah, it's heavy. Was that part of it?

No, no. But like this sect, it was very small. We had a church that we bought for the same price as what it was in the 70s. And we would go knocking on doors like every couple of weeks in this neighborhood and trying to get people to come to our church. And it was just, it was like a jojo was witness type way. Yeah. And like I said, no credit cards, no medication was severely found on.

You were not allowed to have credit cards. No, you shouldn't. It was again highly discouraged. When I planned to go to college, they tried to talk me out of it. They sat me down and they told me science breeds disbelief. Did you go to a normal public school? No. So you're a home school? I went to an alternative education center sanctioned by the church. Yes. Did you get it? So is this so that was is the the education Is it approved by the state? What you the education.

Yeah, I have a high school diploma, which is, I mean, there's a girl I used to be in. What do you mean? The girl I used to be in this. We all have high school diplomas. Yeah, stable. The girl I used to be in this school. Her and her mom started a school where they just teach her kids and her all of her nieces which there's about 11 nieces and nephews in this one What happened her qualified to teach class though. There's nothing. Did you have a curriculum?

Yeah, but the place I went to was different than what most of them went to because I had a medical condition So I went to do learning lab to go see a doctor Well, I my mom did take me to a doctor, but they were always trying to heal me, pray over me. This is very shady. This is very shady. I haven't heard anything called like that. I haven't heard anything that sounds like me. I have a immune deficiency.

I told him it's a light-called. Yeah, yeah, she didn't share this with him. I didn't like email him. I didn't email him. He sought me out. Yeah. Yeah, I know compound. Hold on, let me think. Things are what's the code state approved education. Medical when you need it. It's

all fun camping trip. Round upon. I mean, that doesn't sound like a cult. That's no credit cards. There was. Hold on, is there any crazy like like things that like you saw that were like, I can't believe this happened. Or is it just kind of... No, I once went to a campsite where we went up over a city with a sword. Oh. And we held the sword up to the sky and we prayed in tongues. What tongues?

Yes. No, no, what tongues? Oh, what tongues? Yeah. Just tongues. So you could just make tongue? Oh, what tongues? Yeah, just tongues So you just make a lot of nonsense. I can't speak in tongues. I faked it just like everybody else there because of bullshit I'll say that How old are you? What are you doing? I'm 28 this happened in um wait when when you how old are you when it happens? 16 How do you know you were faking it though?

Because I was faking it. Just like every woman who she's faking. Because you just know. That's what you're doing. Yeah, no. I know she's not speaking the tongue. She's faking the noise. How does she know? How does she know she's not speaking the tongue? She's a different leader. Can you do it right now?

I could fake sweet things. I don't know. I'm not trying to... Like it's just that's all you do. I don't know. If Gim's upbringing is more fucked up than yours, I don't know if you're channel like it's just that's all you know though if get them's upbringing is more fucked up than you I don't know Did your dad shoot a reporter?

No, we're are they still active the church. Yeah, was there any weird sex stuff a Lot of underage marriages well Well, that one the rage. Close to 18, but still like 16, 17. How many brides did the leader have? Just the one. Was she hot? She wasn't a slow bush, right? Please.

No, brides, you said you would serve as a cult? It seems strictly religious. You set this up and this doesn't sound like it. And you want to call this overkill. I was so sorry. I know. Is the egg showing? All right.

Well, talk about this church that they bought. What did they pay for it? I don't know. They told us it was what they bought it. What it was bought for in the 70s. What we have? Have any of you ever seen the documentary Jesus Camp? Yes.

It's that. OK. That's fucked up So yeah, that's what really revealed because I remember in Jesus camp. They were super down on Harry Potter Oh, yeah, you do a Harry Potter podcast. Yes, I do If that's not rebellion, what is and I have tattoos which I was tried to talk out of like it's it was a whole thing Because I wasn't born into it, my life wasn't as I always felt like an outsider. But the people who are still in it, I definitely see. Like what, like your friends?

Yes. Did you witness them doing anything that you're like, what the fuck? Like in Jesus' camp where kids are crying or there's a child preachers. Yeah. Boy, you're a teen girl. Of course you're crying. That's all they do. No, it's hard to explain because it all felt so Normal when I was a kid like that's what I was raised in and only looking back like once I had left and I watched Jesus

Camp I was like holy shit. What hell grew when you watch Jesus camp? I watched it like 24 25 And you're like that just that 25 you realize it was messed up? Yeah. So you thought it wasn't up until the age? I thought it was totally normal. Totally normal? Yes. Got brainwashed, you'd say?

I would think so. Desslated? I mean, even, I know that like it's not the like a sexy cult like Joan's town, but I mean, I at this point, I kind of... I mean, you can say that there is sexy. Yeah. Drinking the Kool-Aid. I yeah, it's a drink and a cool aid. There's a reason why it became part of the Alexa con. You decided to decide to the unsexy if you're alive. I feel like there's no point of having a cult

if there's not sex involved. Oh, there was no sex until marriage. This shit was. Yeah, that's a regular religion. That's a fast keeper. Yeah, I know everybody's down on our kelly right now. And I, you know, I think. But if But if you're called to pee on underage girls. Well, on the underage part, I can't agree with here on microphone.

But I can't say like the thing. But like, you fake down beers away from kill. So I gotta get through the day. I'm going to get out of here. No, I mean, obviously, like, like, the underage thing is problematic in the, in the, what's they say? What's the, the parlance of the times? It's definitely problematic, but like, that's the reason a start occult. Not underage one, but just sex.

Or what she said earlier, which I thought would have really appealed to you is like if we can get TSTSD is recognized as a religion tax-free That's now we're not going to it very difficult. Yeah, yeah, very difficult to do Just deny people some medication and credit card in LLC. We're a fucking we attack 15% you say you say money money back to the back to your cult I'm about four years now. Do you guys have a leader? I like you guys I like money. That is like is he one step under a god?

Our leader here's from God. Yes There is still legal, but there's also the belief that you have a spirit man a man who speaks to you gross in a crime How old is your leader? 50 something That young Yeah, we got to see it now So as if what happens if when is he as he ever talked about doomsday There was always concern that yes, there was a lot of talk about

Someone being the anti-Christ in 2008 really who was it supposed to be oh, I know who was oh my god Yeah, oh, well, we won't say it's Trump definitely was a president though, right? It was a racist 2008 oh so okay so it was it was a cool cool. No it wasn't Obama right? No it was a Obama they don't Obama yeah why cuz he was a black guy or just because he like him It was he was the anti-Christ he was gonna bring a part of me and pop clips but but Obama is sort of bookended by two guys Who are way more repiled than he was so People like Bush now though now they do I wish we go back to the good old

He's just let us do an endless war in the desert So did you have a did you have a date for doomsday? No, no it wasn't it wasn't like that guy Oh, they learned you can you can't give a date. Yeah, no, if you give a date. They still do. They still are giving out dates. They haven't learned their lesson yet. These kids call leaders.

They don't want to stop. I remember being junior high and hearing like, oh, Doomsday's coming like any number of religions and that passes and they're like, oh shit, I must have misread it. I remember wishing Doomsday would go, the, call that every day. The pastor Dan. Pastor Dan.

Pastor Dan Willis or Chicago. He he he was hypnotic for sure. Like we couldn't stop watching. Charismatic guy. But there was something in us that's just like, this is clearly a scam. Right. But not those people in the audience. No, a lot of people too, which I'm not sure. Like Jim Jones,

like Jim Jones was very, very inclusive and woke long before a new that. I think a lot of people are disenfranchised who tend to be drawn to. They need something. Well, they need, they need, they need the feeling of a family. They be lacking that in a real family structure, a real family life. So there's that, it appeals to them some way and somehow and you're willing to forgive anything, any blemishes that may be like, well, this doesn't seem right, but I love the aspect

of these other things that this guy's bringing to this. Right, you're included in something, finally. But at what cost, then you're like, oh, I gotta sign my house over and I gotta get this weird haircut. Like those fucking heavens gate people, they had all had the same haircut. It was not forgiving that haircut.

I will say this in Pasadena's defense. I will. You guys are gonna attack him. No, I mean, anybody would say no, because we were saying, we were sitting there saying, this is a scam,

but we never saw him ask for money No, and we never saw him say anything really Unusual he was just kind of repeating the party line. Yeah, he was just trying to get a message across But so maybe he's not a scam He's taking money though, right? I Is he I would have to how much of your family's income was devoted to your church you had your tides Well, you had to tithe oh he did mention tithing he did 20% not that bad. I thought but isn't a isn't church standard 10% I don't know

Just 20% of what you know much of a hardship was that on your family to give 20% up a month. I mean for me It's a bummer. You're still doing it Oh, no when I was doing it it was very Where did you work? Where how old are you when you were working? You were getting paid to work. I was 24 What you were I work for a county government and you would hand over 20% Did you have a sweet hair cut like the heavens gate people did? Yeah, that was the 80s. Oh heavens gate people did? No, but a lot of the... Yeah. That was the 80s, though, isn't it?

No, this was... Did you have a look? This was like late 90s early 2000s, yeah. Because it was a hellbop, right? They thought a spaceship was shadowing hellbop. How organized was it? Like, did you get like a little envelope that you had to put a few percent?

Oh, yeah, envelope with your name on it. But that's on a comment. That's what those are the envelopes that you used to steal our pinball money out of. Yeah, no, it's it's a hell Satan in American lexicon. It's definitely considered a church, but I mean As an ex-member, I definitely feel like I was Was there one thing you could point to that made you say like I have to leave?

I felt like I didn't have control over any I have to leave. I felt like I didn't have control over any aspect of my life. She met me in the whole fucking sex until marriage went out the fucking window sun. Okay. Do you now have to foster? Since leaving the cult. Have you felt more control of your life? Absolutely. Really? I was hoping you life? Oh, absolutely. Really?

I was hoping you'd be like, no, but. Oh, no, there's a huge difference. Like the stuff I listen to, like the cost of happiness you're like, if only I could get that answer. It would be a great point to make this. Anybody really have control of their life? Had I listened to this podcast when I was there, I would have been sat down. There would have been a private discussion

between the leader and the other elders, just like when I went to college, it would sat down one-on-one, well one-on-three, I guess, and they're talking to you about how it wouldn't be like this, they would have listened to this in all of course language and tattoos and and for I being kind of crazy and. And I can't even have any tattoos. No, I mean like aunt tattoos and like all of that. So you would. So.

You lead the cult. What are the random. What's the fallout from your family? My mom left with me. So she was left at the same time. What and how do you. It was if she just just feeling the same thing? Like I think it's time to go or like,

or do you just control every aspect? Seems like, like let's join a cult mom, okay. Let's leave a cult mom, okay. I was very disillusioned. I'm a pointer, she's tupless. It's you. I mean, you quit the cult, you got a 20% raise. That's fine, that's amazing.

I was very disillusioned and I was sharing it with her. And so she just kind of slowly stopped attending things So about a year after me she had completely separated my my brother Eric said it a while ago He's he's like if Edgar wasn't around This is the fucking paradox is if Edgar wasn't around Pam 100% is the type that would join a cult and then and then give us cool lead like that Absolutely is the type that would join a cult and then give us cool lead like that Absolutely She's a witch she already had it isn't she's a witch sure yeah, yeah, yeah, the girl then called the girl

the nice is the church try to How aggressively that they tried to recruit you back into the whole like Scientology where it wasn't like they hired Probably I guess like they came to the house drop by I tried to Talk to me tried to call tried to like Facebook messaging. There was constant like we miss you like trying to gilt me into coming back Like oh hey, do they really think though that your soul is in danger by leaving my coat. Oh, yeah, so they're really they were trying to help you I guess can we still have the 20% if you don't And how long did they keep it up? Do they still try occasionally?

I still get a constant, or not constant, occasional contact. Do you ever feel like you ever said yourself like, ever see yourself ever going back to it at any point? That's that Tom Steve Dave Nash, isn't he? Yeah, right. I went from one call to another. So before the call, do you not listen to Tom Steve Dave? No. How did you find it then? Listen to other podcasts. No, right. I went from one call to another. So before the call you I'd not listen to Tom Steve Dave. No How'd you find it then?

Listen to other podcasts. No, okay. I don't even figure out they sucked There's other pockets I started out listening to that. That's rule number one over a cold. There are no other You must announce The Nurtist I mean I started there. No, Matt's on the Nurtist. Oh, that is all Nerdist. I mean, I started there. No, Matt's on the Nerdist, man. Oh, that is, come on. He's our friend.

All right. Nertish can listen to you listen to chip chips. I sell comics. I sell comics is penance. If you use a credit card, you got to listen to I sell comics. I notice you're wearing Horn Room glasses. Yeah. Can you explain to me the attraction of horn room glasses?

So you're demonic she's really No, no, I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm literally I kind of do want to know what do you mean by horn round? Well, they think they're you don't think they're reminiscent cats. I find the way All right, I think horn room does a little more drastic But yeah, I guess you know, no no, which is fine. I'm not even saying I don't like Like the plastic and No, I don't worry about it. If you don't know then we can't even talk about it. It's okay. It's okay It's like the way they look the

My great sunken in eyes. You don't like Hornrand glasses. No, I do like them I'm just curious as to why some people pick that because they are choice And I'm just curious but I do like them I do have you felt that you, has your, have you hit the agent where you started to get a little blurry? No, I actually had a vision test because I had to renew my license. Perfect 2020. He has the problem. I used to have better than 2020. So I haven't noticed it, but yeah, it's it's gonna happen, but will you, will you go context or will you go glasses? I'll go glasses Yeah, I'm a glasses. I think it's better. I should go lazy Lazy yeah, why does that bring you back all the way? I got lazy can

1998 somewhere around there and I can still aside from like the close-up stuff which they said would happen like I can still see far away perfect Yeah, well, I have I'm telling that of 2020. I'm like 20. I'm like, I'm good, but it's just the, yeah, the close-up should's annoying. Really annoying if you don't have your glasses and you can see perfectly from far away. Yeah, yeah. I think that's close.

And if you try to take two steps with the glasses on, you're looking to throw up. Yeah, exactly. Huh. So when did you say that start? I would say 45, 46. Oh, so I'm still approaching. Yeah.

That's when I noticed that. That was the first thing. That, you know, that was the first sign of, you know, advancing age that your body would betray you. Yeah. Bones still good though. Yeah, your banners on point.'m not going to talk about that. Yeah, no, no, the religious woman in the mirror missed.

Not really. Did they talk about bonus or anything? Oh, god, no sex talk. No sex talk. Sounds about right. I didn't know anything about anatomy until I was well out. What a fun learning process. Then how did you learn about an

enemy? Like how did that happen? TV. And were you? Oh yeah? Were you were you nervous when you saw it? Were you like like you got out? Were there residual feelings of like guilt and shit because you know? Absolutely guilt and shame. Yeah. Yeah. We could we just weren We were supposed, I mean, it's all basically to your own devices in this, but it was very highly like shame that you not use them too much. The one guy only had dial up until about a year and a half ago from what I had.

Get them like lucky. All right, well, any more calls to questions? I mean, I do. I want to know like your friends. When you left, I'm sure some of them are like, what are you doing? Are they still like, are they still in it? Oh, yeah. I mean, I don't, I don't, there's literally one person who will talk to me without trying to pressure me into coming back Like and her and I just have this like separation from like we're not gonna talk about this So I still talk to her and her I get to see her five kids So she's I thought you want to let those sex if you're married. Oh, she's married. Yeah Do the 29 30 they want they want families to have a lot of children? Oh, yeah, lots of kids.

Why? It's, it indoctrinated the religion it builds up. Builds the, yeah, it was the population. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, they're every, every single family had a kid before they were 24, 23. And they should have just Italian. Could just be Italians. Oh, yeah. I just Italian could just be Italian Did they make those beers away from the queue?

So they get some self-control Fucking waps Come on, Ellis, I know what they're fighting Rupella My greasy disgusting mother was born into them I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have a million views. Nubbly done. She's pregnant at 18. Fucking horrible. I don't know if I was not on the pair of shoes in 20. Fucking Italians. Where's my beers?

Get them, did you drink my beer? Yeah, you drink my fucking beer. I work hard. We're in a fucking movie. So that's it for you then. And now you look back and you're like, what the fuck? What was I thinking? Oh, yeah, I, I, I, I was.

But, and like I said, I know that this isn't a cult by most people's standards, but as a person who left it, yeah, I know. I know. And that's why I tried to tell you I was like, I don't know if this is going to, but you were like, I don't want't know anything before I talk to your defense though He's the one I called it all tease the one that painted this picture that was like, you know Cold it sounds pleasant No, no

Yourself not knowing the human anatomy until the age 25 when I get a match up before the age eight when you're blazer glory come out that was what I started to learn all about I can't I could drop some TMI on you but I'm doing a pleasant for you if I can no now I'm fine with it what about what about alcohol no alcohol no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no a mass or whatever you want. What about communal nettoes? Was there anything? No. No. Communal. And then that.

But the wine, they, they, it wasn't like wine wine. It was great. But who is the fucking guy in charge? The guy that was in charge of this part was a guy named Rick. What do you mean this part? Like it's evangelicals are all across America. But what's that done, denomination really? Evangelical. It's just evangelicals. Yeah, it's non-denominational evangelicals. So what's a denomination really? Evangelical.

It's non-denominational evangelical. So what is he preaching? A lot of hate stuff. Hate stuff? Yeah. Like teaching all the puppies how to do the... Like what hate stuff? Like um, that gays are bad.

Right. You believe that for many years. That was one of the few things that I did not like. What was something that you believe the time that you learned is not true? Sex is bad. Well, that's not a hate. What about aliens? We didn't believe in it.

We didn't discuss aliens first. We went into space aliens. Yeah, that's very. What hate things are the drawings you had that you bought until you got out? Hate things that I bought Abortion that was a big one. It was really a hate. Oh, no, you hate people who have abortions. Yeah, you hate the people that get abortions That's a big one. Okay, so you hate you hate people who are pro Abortion you hate gay people

You hate black people are Are there black people? Because there were not any black people in my church. That's fair. Pennsylvania is very white. No, I mean, there wasn't any racist hate. Like it wasn't. Because there's no way to hate, right? Because everyone's like's like really white It's very it's a very white area. Do you find yourself not believing in God now? Oh, yeah You think you'll ever find a point in life I think you could you could think you'd become more spiritual religious not on that level, but some other type of podcast Real

Religious outlet or not. I don't know if that looks like spiritual. Like, uh, like Buddhism or something. So, well, I, I mean, 10 years ago, I would have never thought I could have said that I was in anything. It's like, I would have thought I would have been struck down like that I was going to go to hell. Did you hear what the, what the Pope said recently? There is no hell.

This Pope is real chill. I'm kind of okay with this. Do you hear that? Somebody said that he, that he changed the rule.. Like he had been like changing the rules and shit. Now there's no hell. He said, there's no hell. There's no hell. And what happens is the souls that are condemned, the hell, they don't actually go to a hell and get punished. They just disappear. They don't exist anymore. But they're not.

Preferable to hell. Wait, the Pope is a voice of God. He's what he said in a newspaper article or a magazine or I imagine there's a lot of pushback on that. Yeah, he got a lot of low back from that. More so than Brian Godfru for his black pants or comments. You mean more than seven miles? From a bunch of babies with too much time on their hands?

Well, BBC is saying the Pope did not, sorry, you know, the Pope did not say that. He's got a backtrack that's why if he's the voice of God, then he shouldn't be backtracking. I think he probably got called on the carpet by whoever was like, hey, you can't say that name. We got a hole for the whole of the turn. We got a whole rack of going out here.

You can't be out of vote for Cushion. All the carnal scots are going on. The souls of sinners descend into hell where they suffer eternal fire, the Catholicism states. However, this latest guy, I guess, said there's no where in Catholic teaching that actually says anyone person is in hell.

Whoa! He was apparently exploring the imagery of hell, fire and brimstone and all that. There's never been a part of Catholic teaching. It's been a part of Catholic iconogra's part of it's been a part of Catholic icon a icon a group Prousset word icon iconography. That's it. I've never said that word in my life. I've never seen Brian Johnson. Yeah, I've never said that word iconography The pope clearly says there's no hell does that change the game for everything and everybody? I think it changes the game for some people

But I don't think I think there's some people who would still live their life Still leave that good moral life. They're not just gonna go All of a sudden wake up and be like no hell Okay, I'm gonna go out and commit Sodom and Gomorrah. But the purge doesn't start. I was I was about to just say tell Steve they even go do that right. Yeah, I don't think that there's some people who who might I think a small fraction would be like oh there's no price to pay. Let me go let me go do whatever I want. What would you do if there was no problem? On Mike, you got some advice. But if there's no hell and there's only heaven

and nothingness, that means if you're not good and you banished to nothingness, which in essence would be a version, would have to be like a hell. Yeah, do you believe? I mean, I never, I never is pinned down on this. Remember. Yeah, you worked for me. I never he's pinned you down on this Remember yeah

I do my comics here I believe that there is a higher power Rub in your hands into the Mike Greek I believe there's a higher power. I don't believe that they He or they or she Middle with our lives on a daily basis like it like you know in the old I hope you're gonna ignore things Yeah, like time Well someone please metal

I need some metal to ask some metal You're happy right? I can use some more happiness I would say but I Here we go I love this what do you mean? And what do you mean? I love the tracks No, no, why do you want me to be happy? And what way I love the track? No, no, no. Why did we happen in more way in more way? I can't think of anything else to talk about my head, but I like I said I can name like five things on your behalf if you'd like me to but

like you know I feel like I I can Reckon saw that with the big bang and everything and that we know what happened after the Reconciled with the big bang and everything and that we know what happened after the the point But I believe that you know God was Can you just ask you a question? One thing that you think would make your life better make your little happy health year, right? Yeah, healthier I'm waiting for the scale. I've been waiting for the scale. Yeah, we had to have it specially constructed. We're not doing this show on the side of the turnpike at the truck stop.

I'm happy to hear that you believe in a higher power. It makes my heart feel good. It really does. I wish that these two could get on board with that. Yeah, me too. I wish I could dilute myself into it. I think. Yeah, me too. I wish I could dilute myself into it. I do.

You'll see me when I'm older. Maybe there's something to it. Well, worst case scenario now you get blinked out of existence. It's like a fall asleep. That's how it's going to happen anyway. It's so something to deal. But this is my point about that. Like if I go to heaven and all my friends aren't there

and my family, I feel like I'm there right now. I'm looking at an angel. And now it's not even on God's list. Straight from heaven. And she's your legal wife. That's right. You're my property. There's a rule that the rule of the Old Testament.

The rule of the. But it's not switch. Oh, that's right. Switch. property The rule of the rule of the whole testament rule of them Was that switch? Oh, that's right switch. I'm a stripe you girl But Q. Why are you assuming your friends won't be there? I'm gonna be there You'll be there. That's what I am all you need up in heaven To play a harp if I've ever heard a little bit of fucker that's gonna sit at the right hand of God It's just my jolly mental cocksucker That's true Right but like you get there and like none of us are there and like I could deal with that What if God like

You know I'm waiting for it in the cell But there We're safe But like what if like one of your daughters decide she's an atheist and that she's not there? Yeah, that's not happening Right but what if I don't know? It's not my house I don't know the younger one. She's like she's an atheist and she's not there. Yeah, that's not happening. Right, but what if? I don't know.

If not my house. I don't know the younger one. She's like, she's got a mind of her own, right? Right, just a good shit. But what if? Like, like, not you, but if someone says they go there and they believe that they had one way with daughter and she's not there, it's not a journal art break. I'm trying, I'm sorry, I wasn't here and I was still thinking about it about the, I'm sorry.

I know, he brought to a, yeah. If a family goes to heaven, but there was one daughter that didn't make the game. Oh my God. Like how was that heaven? Knowing that your sister and wife and with daughter got a good out of existence. Because you know the rules. You know the rules.

Yeah, but you can't just accept that. You know the rules going in like you were told there's a price to pay. So fuck them. No, we feel sorrow up in heaven. We're gonna be sad. We're the cause that one didn't get in but we can furlough from heaven. In case you wonder, I'm just gonna head back in a little while. So it's not all that you knew the price did she knew that like if you don't give it your paying the price. How so? Because you're missing your your love, but I'm in heaven though, so like I

But I'm in heaven or so like it's so From what I'm told it's so unbelievably amazing that you forget your daughter That you told you that's what that's what at least that's my version. I have not it's like it's like ecstasy Yeah, you've not non-stop like you wake up like ecstasy. Yeah, and you've not. Non-stop. Like you wake up in the morning and you just get a blowjob. And then you get to watch. I think I'd rather be point out of it. Oh my God.

I think sex is not, and it means nothing in the afterlife. I don't think that I think that's a human base. What are you talking about? It means nothing to me now. But here is, I've never had, this isn't going to joke. I've never had a better feeling than an orgasm. It's the best feeling in the world. Wait till you get to heaven.

Then you'll be like, holy shit. I thought I thought was awesome. Yeah. It's basically like root canal. That's what an orgasm will feel like. So, like a nice- I don't worry, you're also pure sorrow in case something doesn't go your way. So I just feel it in my bones walking around floating or playing my heart.

Yeah. I mean, yeah. Like the things that you are brains can't, um, they can't register. They can't, they can't accept what heaven's going to be like. So you like, we have to try to describe it and and and try to feel and you know equate it to things that we feel on earth on the earthly Yeah, but yeah blow jobs and and work out and forget about it. That is like So you're you're evolved your a president. I don't want to evolve pass the blowjob. I don't want to I would rather be stuck in the turn If heaven was this feeling and hell was just bloke jobs I'd be like Whatever man down 2018 The bible does lay out a good rest of my beer. Where is it? We'll hold that hog.

You know. Talk about my hog to show you having. So what if though? What if like, you know, angels are... Yeah. Let's say there is a version of angel, Yeah. Quaidus.

Angel Quaidus. Oh my god. I'd watch that porn Right that'd be amazing, but it's not like on earth though. Well then what is it like the only way you can feel that like you feel Norguyson here is you got a blow of dude there I get the heaven they're like he is your harp. Yeah, here you go. There's a movie theater playing jaws Like high-deaf like it's a fun place, you know, the four K jaws. You get to experience orgasm, but you have to blow dudes to get, but when they come, you come, right, I would totally blow dudes. All day, man. It's not gay. I don't know. You should have it is. It doesn't matter to me.

I care anymore. You guys are just wondering what you're going on with the man. I just got to get mine. I'll care who else gets theirs. Yeah, I think we should all get asked. And then the curtain opens and it's really hell though. Like, job is palace. Where it's like somewhere here. Are we still coming?

But you thought you were in heaven, but you're really in hell. Right. So every gay person who sucks at dick essentially, you're saying they're like, no, no, no, I'm just saying, like, I don't think that again, I really believe this though, I'm not falling around. I don't believe that sex or anything like those pleasures of human pleasures are none of it are gone and not long. It's not like that. It's not significant. There's none in heaven. What if there's none on earth? What is this basic, this is a resemble the teachings of your cult? The heaven he's describing?

Well, I mean, they've like, It's certainly not the one he used to describe. Biblically, basically? Basically, it's just gold street. The town go could do that in Soho. You know, when you're describing, I'm because I don't, because I don't, I would have taken a hand in there.

If I can go to Soho and just rent the theater and play jaws, little dudes, one of the other, I'm a cousin. What's going on? The salad's have worked. Yeah, blue dudes one of the other I'm To my harp So you're telling me That if you came every time you will do it hard, right? You would have loaded I'd be blonde it. Yeah, of course The fox sake hard right you would have loaded I'd be blonde it yeah of course the Fox sake yeah right get him that's a secret formula you would it was all a trap

it was all a champion gross this is how you play for a month to us get him do you have you gone to church ever oh yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I went to a Catholic school So we went to we had convocation every morning, which is pretty much like church. Mm-hmm. You know, we all said prayer sang songs Speaking tongues. No, no speaking tongues confessions You will if you wanted to go to confession you could the driver confess something you wish you didn't confess I don't think I have a I don't think I would love to taste a pre-semen. I'm going to come soon. You don't have to do it, Confessions? No. No. I found that to be, did you guys do Confessions?

I mean, yeah. I always found that to be the strangest aspect of religion is that most awkward I should say. It's the only reason I would want to be a priest is to hear everyone's dark secrets. I would love to do it I would love to do that sit there and just be like hey, but because all you got to say is like hey Are you sorry? And they're like yeah, it's like all right Say a couple of hellmarries and come back next week after you do something else fucked up How do you think it like you think I'm not you but a normal priest? do you think he feels do you think that's his like, his cinematics?

His cinematics? Do you think that's his like, like his, like, his weight and like, oh, I know this housewife's coming in today and last time she told me a doozy. Right. Definitely. She was, she was fucking this hunky TV star former fireman Wait, is that my wife is it?

I'm trying to trust me. It's not your wife. I've tried Try it so many times. I like it. You're going to heaven, baby. You're an angel Sometimes it feels like all I do is try That we're so married try Do I do I think do I think the priests like they're To not look not get into but do you think that there's a little bit more do you think they hate it that aspect of it? Or do you think there's a little level of like this is why I took this job like a little sort of like a little French better a little friend boy or is a little peak on the like behind little sort of like a little fringe better a little fringe Boyer is a little peak on the way behind the curtain of like what people are up to in suburbia

I Don't I can't even I cannot try to get into the mindset of a priest like I can Because I got like in confession. It's never like she's gonna say like well. I cheated on my husband She's not gonna be like and then she pulled out my bow said, you know what I mean? Like it's never like she's gonna say like well I cheated on my husband she's not gonna be like and then she pulled up my blouse you know what I mean like it's not some lacious we would to get an awful you know well they got nothing got nothing else though maybe internet just like I don't know what they don't do that they some of them less children yeah I guarantee you don't know they come of them definitely more yeah, that wasn't the old indies Is it a weird though you know what I found out about confession was one like you would go and you'd have the screen

Like five weeks in a row between you and the guy and then the six weeks on the six week You'd have to go in that room with no screen and you'd have to sit one-on-one with them because it was the line was too long and then you sit there looking at some dude and you're like, allied. Did anybody do that? I never gave it a confession. Oh really? You did that for like when you guys got married. I had to fucking take a class. I took classes. Wasn't a concession. Yeah. Yeah, you never gave a confession? Never. Oh, shit. When's the last time you gave confession in school? High school. Yeah.. Oh, it's the way it's how you gave confession in school high school For me, it's wake up. Was it just stuff like I lied? Well, I was it was shit like that I got too much pussy again this week father Yeah, I never talked about sex at all and I never like it was never it was always like I lied or always some shit like that

It was a silly. Do you offer up something lame so you don't have to give the good stuff? No, I never really felt the good stuff was worth. Fother was good. No, no, hey, that was nothing like what? It occurred to me. Yeah, I was like, you know, can we just the same shit we can week out? Queue, wall, and I are all high priests of this toms deep deep cult.

So if you wanted to make a confession right now, we would hear it. A lot of other people would too Yeah, what do you think is there something you want to tell us? Oh wait a second though. I have no idea what you're fishing for I'm trying to read your mind and it's not working If we really did open like you said open the church so that every aunt would have to give us 20% of their income I think that's

percent of the record. I think that's a ball of the beyond skull cells. You have to have a skull in order to be, you know, if you're going to come to the service, you got to bring your skull. Have you guys seen the rabbit following if you guys open to compound people would move in. That would be awesome. Oh my God. People talk about the USD child. You know, you want to hear their emails. You know,, you know, you want to live a long time. I'm not allowed in. There's no rabble browsers. There's no way, there's no way. You don't want to be in charge of all that shit. I had a good time at the pinball thing. There's a very good people. I like them a lot. We had a lot of fun at the pinball thing.

They also have 15 drinks in me. Well, I have 50 drinks in me all the time. You're not responsible. We're going to have to eat weight out with daily food. Right, you're also left. We don't do that. That's why you have like accolades and shit. It's like a step down. We sit around all day doing it over the fuck we want. Micro-manager. And then yeah, and then we got like, Gidham. He'll go and do shit, you know. Got Kim now. She's experiencing cults, so she can help do shit, you know, I don't know I think when we need you're just in camping

Get him has a experience she fell in a river The same shirt are you sure you were part of a recreate? 20 minutes ago I was sucking dick same shirt. Are you sure you were part of a recreate? I don't feel bad, Kim. It's 20 minutes ago, I was sucking dick and in these footage, I was watching jaws, I was calling it heaven. Welcome to Tellum Steve Dave. I get them. You have experienced taking beds and pounds. What was the one thing that you would say like, ah, if only we had this. Like, so you coveted something, which you probably couldn't admit to anyone, right?

When you were in the cult. Yeah, like you coveted something which you probably couldn't admit to anyone right? When you were in the cult, yeah like you were 16. Sure. What did I covet? I was 16. Yeah, what did you covet that you were like who would be in big trouble? Big trouble. Well, I mean, I was super horny because I was 16. You weren't allowed to masturbate. I mean. Did you check? No,. I mean. They checked? No, but I mean, you felt the guilt on the shame.

Well, I was, you do that, you feel that anyway. I never heard of this. Really? Really? You see movies? Yeah, that's our rated ones. Star Wars and stuff. Like, was like fantasy, frowned upon.

Yeah, just like Harry Potter wasn't allowed, neither was like, why, why Harry Potter? That's why, that's why. Because of witchcraft, it's witchcraft. That's why she does the Harry Potter wasn't allowed neither was like why why that's why because it's witchcraft Yeah, and that's why she does the Harry Potter podcast. What's the name of it? So in case people like Harry Potter I can not I know I got sitting next to one Oh, that's right you like the gay one Oh, yeah, Dumbledore was gay. And then he didn't say you were Dumbledore.

No, no, he said that I was a Dumbledore. That's because he's got the gay. She said he was gay. The hair of books were written. He's not gay in the books. Oh, he doesn't do anything gay. He doesn't do anything gay in the books of the movies. She just said he's gay.

And now they're doing the movies without that aspect of it too. So far. I've read all the books. I've seen all the books. You've seen. Yeah. I've read the books through twice. All for the movies. You've got to watch your books, though. Collect. I haven't somewhere. Yeah.

I got through the good 10 minutes of the first movie. I was like, it's all gay. It's all gay. I don't know. I have my books at my Harry Potter book light. Hey, Harry Potter's awesome. I agree. I'm sorry. I just can't. I just

There's no difference. I know it's I know it's so hypocritical, but it just looks so It's corny as fuck. Oh yeah, it is. I just agree on a broomstick? It's just like how good can it really be though? How well-written can it really be? Oh, you've never read it? Very well written. Okay. I don't know. And people like, again, he's this guy's at 10, so I do respect.

Especially, my favorite shows, the best shows I've ever watched, most of them come from Q. He's like, oh, you should watch this. Books I've read, most of the really good ones. I have one blemish on my record. There's, yeah. That got him stricken by deadwood. Yeah, that's true. You promised me that that got off the record Oh, so you so you so you tried the Harry Potter on his recommend it. No, no, no I didn't know he liked it that much until right now. I mean I like I'm standing up for it I wouldn't sit there and be like I'm a fucking Potter head

But I do think that's very good you what you should read is the dark tower books by Stephen King. That's like a fucking better version of a series of Potter. Of course it's fucking Stephen King. It's not about a lot of Stephen King. That doesn't fly anymore man. It's like stolen. No Harry Potter is a really well written man. They're good. They're good. What's the name of your podcasting on the I've forgotten? It's Harry Potter revisited. Harry Potter revisited and you talk about Harry Potter every week. I mean we devolve but yes. What's your best of your podcasting on the I've forgotten it's Harry Potter revisited Harry Potter revisited and you talk about Harry Potter every week I mean we devolve but yes, what's your best that is you're making hang episode of We did not have a making hey what's your favorite Harry Potter book? I'm cool with that the third book is your favorite. Yeah, it's pretty it's pretty dark. Oh, yeah, what's it called?

How many episodes have you recorded? We're at like 36. Okay, so you've been over a year doing it. No 52 weeks in a year. Oh So you're doing according to our cow The TSD compound Definitely island time. So you've been doing it for you've been doing it week in a week out you put an episode out. I mean we've missed two or three weeks but yeah. All right so you observe almost a little over half a year. Yeah. What's the what's the go-to

episode then if you're gonna say someone's just gonna like I want you if you're gonna listen to it listen to this episode. I don't remember what we talk about the minute I stop editing. What? Yeah, I saw that. What is it that you guys can talk about for 36 weeks about this shit? Well, I mean we talk about each chapter. We're rereading it chapter by chapter. We just read it aloud. No, it's not audio book. We talk about each chapter. Okay, so we discuss it and we make jokes. Break it down. Yeah. So you're up to chapter 36 on the first book book No, there's not 36 chapters in the first book. We're on the second book. Okay, and Do you see to get like?

Is it just fanning out or do you get critical of it to you like I need at this point? We should you tear it apart. We because we love it so much. We make fun of it We just make jokes basically just really crashed shit Really, yeah We make fun of it. We just make jokes basically just really crashed shit You read the books yeah, huh you don't have to subscribe I still have all my own alers from when they were released the first day. I'm down down I believe it What other boats have you read this is this is the company you keep Get this is this is the company you keep right I'm going to get out of there.

Actually downloaded a bunch of his books from a tablet. Frank Herbert Gain. We're being getting right now. We're reading a book together. The Brady 12. Or the Brady method.

The Brady 12. The Tom Brady method. Yeah, we're reading Tom Brady's autobiography together. We're thinking about starting a podcast on it and breaking down the chapters. Right? Yeah. We'll tell're thinking about starting a podcast on it and breaking down the chapters, right? Yeah, we tell them that with Tom what we learned about nightshade. Wait, what? Wait, I'm sorry, I miss out. You're breaking down what? Tom Brady?

Yeah, Tom, yeah, we're meeting again. We're reading the book and we don't go on to get too far ahead of each other, so we can talk about it at work. I thought you were on episode 74 covering the kiss. But tell Q about what we learned about it. Maybe 12 is gone. Yeah. About nightshade and strawberry. No, it's actually tomatoes. Tomatoes are really good. Well, it's part of nightshade. We know that. Yes, it's our nightshade family. So that's why Tom Brady doesn't eat eating them. It's a fucking, it's about fitness. But it's not all. It's about him too. It's seen through a personal Yes, but everything is about Frady's perspective. Yeah, it's about fitness. I say it's not

That's that's being you are not subscribing to either of these we haven't finished the book yet But I mean, I'm sure chapter one is not whatever's going on in his life What are you talking about we're learning about we're learning about the man part? Retrace and pliability all this stuff. He's Tom Brady has never gotten a sunburn Because he stays hydrated You're claiming you get drunk every night to fall so you'll make it That you are now in the hydration wasn't seeing your sunburn just shit This is before we read the book though. Yeah, but you've read that chapter

You're an alcoholic My red nose Like read watch leaving us Vegas that's for you We're like read watch leaving us Vegas. That's for you It's not it's our own part we're not we're not putting this real pop up like when we get talk about it We talk about why he said it and if there's maybe hidden meetings to what he said though because I don't believe I Believe there's some sort of code in that Tom Brady book that's not John I'm not a tradition. No, we've got to be some kind. We've got, we've both theorized that he, just like Walt, he's also a super-stomper.

Yes. Okay, what chapter do you have on? What chapter do you have? We're on chapter three. Chapter three. Okay, I ought to hear this podcast. I have people who don't call it the goats, I'm going to be disappointed. All right, so if I order this book now, I can not a here this podcast. I'm just calling the goats under the bed. I'm disappointed. All right, so if I order this book now,

I can't you. I'm doing a audiobook. But why? Like, okay. Yeah, that's why you can, like, when you're driving around or you can just pop it on, like we're doing. Yeah. We got the written book and the audiobook.

Read by Tom Brady. Yeah. Listen to the audiobook, drink it, three gallons of water. I don't see. But why do you tell them why he doesn't like nightshade? Because it's detrimental to your system. No. No, tomatoes are part of a nightshade family.

Oh. He will not, he does not like, he is very strict about eating anything with tomatoes. Because. Did he just wolf down a entire pizza? What the fuck? We're not, we're not, that was the book you had before. We're not. You sucked off a pizza and a candy tomato in your mouth.

The other thing missing was jaws. Like, he had red sauce all over his face. You guys think that just because we're reading it, that we're going to become Tom Brady? No, no. I don't. That was your thing. I think you crossed my mind. I sleep well till I walk out.

I'm not judging you in that way. But the reason he doesn't need to make, like, to limit his tomato use is because tomatoes cause inflammation of the joints. Okay, I'm going to have another slice what you're talking about this. And he doesn't believe in weight workout, like pumping iron. I remember you said that. Yeah, he likes to be be pliable more than muscular. How some absorb hits that. That makes sense for the guy who's a quarterback.

He's not a linebacker, so he doesn't need to like crush people. It kind of makes sense, but you know what? Until 2015, 2018, no one's ever said that out loud though. So like, how come it took so how come it took so long to figure out like, pliability is maybe more advantageous than being jacked up? Because there are tons of great quarterbacks who have not been playable, and nobody thought it was necessary.

You're saying he's the greatest quarterback of all time? I think so. That's why he's regarded as? I think a lot of people, but that's up for debate. Right, it's objective, but popular opinion is he's, he's up there. Oh, yeah, they wanted a top, top in the, in the history of the, of the sport. Yeah, he'd be in a top at least easily top five. Right. And there have not been any pliable quarterbacks prior to this.

Most of the time, well, quarterbacks aren't, aren't built like, um, like Arnold, because, you know, they don't need to be. But he's even less defined, although he is ripped, he is awesome, but he's not like... But he's not like chiseled. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done.

I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done.

I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I tell them, don't read ahead, wait for me, and then, you know, I've been causing us to stall a little bit here, and it's definitely my fault.

But don't you think that you're, well, you're a successful man, beautiful family? Well, that depends on, on, on, on, on, I mean, that's all up to, again, it's up for debate with what's successful. Okay, well, by my definition, you're a homeowner. You have two successful, three successful careers. You have a beautiful family. Okay. You have a lovely dog who does not give a hitless I got too lovely dogs too lovely does that do not give hitless loose. You're a good person. You're generally well liked don't you think that maybe

You should be instructing get him I I've tried you've tried I've tried I have I all I must admit that I get frustrated though And then I and then I stopped trying because but he's unteachable, but I think us reading this book together though It allows us to it allows me also to not only the TB method But the WF method can also seep into while we're talking about it. Oh I know you like Tom Brady is it difficult to read with all the pages method can also see Ben too while we're talking about it. Oh. I know you like Tom Brady is it difficult to read with all the pages together.

Don't worry about it smart ass. He got it from me on a PDF. A little with the extra thing. Oh, get it. What happened to the iPad I bought you just threw it out? Oh, no, I just said I got this for my Jeep. But that's not what I asked. I said, what happened to the iPad I bought you just threw it out? Oh, no, I got this for my Jeep, so that's not what I asked. I said, well, what happened? There's like nothing I've ever seen. It looks like a giant iPhone kind of what is it? It's an aces. We better wrap it up though because we're going to see Monster Magnet tonight. That's true. He said our out of half before he's on. Yeah, I mean, you know, I thought we could you know, we got how long is that right from here to the Starland? I don't know. But his new album came out you pick it up I did not

I picked it up called my mind effort oh yeah that's right you said that uh you'd wish that he had it yeah I mean I don't say wishes a strong word I don't know but the two standout tracks if you're interested if you want if somebody's on the fence about buying his new album I Is drowning a great song great lyrics and another song called All day midnight. I hope you play tonight. Yeah, I hope you play some this probably well Right, so we want to see a remember he faced the other he faced the other direction it was like fiddling with his hand for like pretty way preoccupied with something that was going on with behind the scenes. Yeah like his amplifier or something. Yeah, he was a it was crazy How how much time he spent with his back to the audience trying to get that whatever he was trying to fix right now? I know that When Q was

celebrated on the the devil's broadcast Yes, and you being a fan it hit you kind of hard now. We're going today you and I Q was celebrated on the devil's broadcast. Yes. And you being a fan at HitchieConnoHard. Now we're going to the UNI general admission. Q's going, he's got, he's sitting in a special celebrity seat. We're told. Is this the devil's all over again? Not at all, because when Dave's album dropped, I bought it.

The second it was available. And I listened to it, you know, I listened to it, and then I sent him an email. I didn't even say I was going to the show. I just sent him an email going, like, hey man, I picked up the album. Kicks ass as usual. He wrote back, thanks.

He goes, hey, I want to let you know, I'm playing a show at the Starland. You want to come, I'll get you in. And I was like, I already got tickets already. So I would have got, this is one that I would have got it. Well you could have I could have got in here too But he could have still offered that even though you have the ticket right you could have been like oh and by the way I didn't I didn't I want to I don't want to like you's getting in for I don't even I choose getting for free, isn't he? I leave so yeah We're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we we're we're we're we're we're we we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we're we we're we're we're we're we're we we're we're we're we we're we we're we we're we're we're we we're we're we we're we we're we we're we we're we we're we we're we we're we we're we we're we we we're we we're we we we're we we we're we we we we we we we we're we we we we we we we we we we we we, we're we're Because the devil celebrated you and that was wallets thing now magnet is celebrating you by letting you sit in the model section with all the models and shit

I don't think I assume we're all sitting there. Yeah, that's not magnet. It's the the manager of the place. Okay The manager of the venue got you. Yeah, so to me, yeah, like If Dave had personally like got him into that section and you know, then I might maybe a little would have felt a little guilty, a little, a little twinge of jealousy, but not, not in this case. Okay. Did you buy your tazers? I brought my tickets. Yeah. We bought them. Well, maybe if you would ask Dave for tickets, he would have, I, well, I didn't want to though. Yeah. Because it's a very intimate setting anyway. And I feel like, you know, it's not, and it's not expensive. I wouldn't support the dude. It's the same place. No, no, yeah, yeah. It's not that intimate. It's wall to wall people. I want to sit, I want to support the dude. It's the same place. Yeah, yeah, it's not that intimate is wall to wall people

I want to sit I want to sit on it. I want to sit I'm hoping that like wherever they're sitting you is like you could sit and still see the the Yeah, I guess yeah It'll be fun. It's my first concert in since last month's remake the show. No, well I mean while I went to my daughter in a whole bunch of shows But I guess this is my first concert like with the guys's or maybe show. No, well, I mean, well, I went to my daughter to a whole bunch of shows, but I guess this is my first concert like with the guys, the boys and I doubt. Wow.

Since, well, directly to the venue, directly home after. 2014. Boys are back at home. Yes. Was that 2014? When we went to see KISS? Yeah. Well, that was part of Convoopman.

We worked the boys. Yeah, but that was like, that was working. I like it when we went to see kiss yeah well that was part of com football we worked a place yeah but that was like that was working like a me where there's a really so that's it I felt like it would uh... that we would get our our metal blood up hearing all this cult talk but it just seems like in overly zealous church experience. Sorry. Don't worry.

You'll have horror stories to tell once you break free of the tell-em-steed-dave cult. No, once this goes out, I'll get all the hatred from everybody. I'll leave. Welcome to our world. Say what you're thinking, everybody's on your ass for it. What's the alternative? The alternative? Not saying it. Or saying mouth shut. Everybody loving you? Fuck wants that. That's not going to happen. What's that? What was that? Saying what you believe and everybody loves you for it? Who wants that? That sounds horrible too.

I don't know. That doesn't sound happy. You have to have a certain level of, of combativeness in you, I think. A little healthy debate. Yeah, yeah, you know, yeah, you can't have somebody just on your grade all the time. I have a feeling like once in a while it would be nice. That's kind of what you're you struggle with to go back when we talked about last week, because it's like there's no healthy debate over anything That's the product. Yeah, it's all just fucking Fucking endless bitching and loaning

People who side of it. I think it's also he struggles with with the He hears when people are saying these things or he reads them when these things are being said They're like telling him what to do. That's the worst thing you can do to Brian Johnson. Tell him what to do. I mean, that is like, that's his kryptonite is when someone telling him what to do. But I, but like, I don't know, you don't want to hurt anybody. No, I don't want to hurt anybody. But I, like, I also, I don't read the news.

Like the only news I get is like, if I listen to a podcast, like, I don't really look at like the only news I get is like if I listen to a podcast like I don't really look at You must have got that the news about that dog the dog because I heard on the Jim and Sam show Like I was gonna read this thing about this deaf police officer that Troy sent me A police department in Texas just hired its first ever deaf female officer. I'll bet you they're lining up to be her partner Wait, what yeah, has that even possible? Let me tell you a few would you need to have hearing to be a police officer? I would say so I would say it's a pretty Well, you know help you should be well even if it's yes one yes sure two but like you need all your senses when you're trying to solve crimes No, what if someone's shooting at you? I know, there you go. He's blind, he's solved some crimes. Oh, but he made up for it with, well, not real.

But he also made up for it with, you know, echolocation. Yeah. This is the second I read this, I'm like, oh my god. So this is what the lady says, Erica Trivino. I don't, look, I'm all about people with disabilities overcoming obstacles in shit, but not at the risk of putting,

you know, someone else's life in jeopardy. It's a passion of mine. Said Erica Trivino, newly hired police officer at Delhar P.D. is not something I just want. It's something God has called me to do. This fucking second you bring that into the conversation. I'm like, I'm sorry, but that is observed. It's absurd and it shouldn't be like, again, I'm for inclusivity, all that shit. But you can't hear. I mean, for inclusivity, people should be included in shit.

But not based on disabilities or whatever. This though, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this I should be a secretary cop. I don't think that's what she wants. But I want to say like, nobody that I know even speaks sign language. So how can everybody communicate? Well, she speaks four different sign languages, but which is a pretty impressive. She completely deaf, though. I believe so. This just you have one of those miracle ears. Yeah, she was like, I was up late one night.

I was up late one night. I got that in a fucking hurricane I have concerns about this. I don't understand how like what do they say? How do they explain? She can handle her job Right, that's what I mean she has a partner who's now doing double duty because the chick can't hear I think it I mean, I'm sorry really doing double duty. Yeah, there's a cop Yeah, really doing double you're in the fucking field and you're trying to interrogate someone and a fucking dude's coming up behind you and the lady doesn't hear it. That's a lot of danger. I feel like if we ask Troy, he'd be like, hey,

I'd rather not. Is he on the streets though? Do we know that? He's on the street patrol. It says here, the first six months on the job she will be partnered with a field training officer and work the night shift. Her goal is to work in criminal investigations division after she climbs up the ranks of the department. I don't know if she's in the field or not. I'd be field training officer sounds like she is. I mean she could have a like even if she has her other senses she might be so high. Does she have one of those giant horns she can put up to her ear. I'm curious because like she like even if her mind is a steel trap like the demands of the job is that you could hear people's you could hear danger. No. How much do you think hearing

places in the role of your everyday comment on average? I at say 100% yeah yeah just on average yeah I mean there's a reason for that radio is it so you can communicate with other officers and get information maybe she'll feel the vibrations though and the radio is coming in though yeah but yeah and then handed to the dude and then he's gonna have to tell her what they said it's yeah maybe they'll have like you know it'll be a reader it'll come out it's spelled that on a certain a special radio or something It's gonna reason the number of gunfighting I see Jason. I don't think you need to hear the gun fight I don't think I think is I think your eyes are more important in your ears

We're gonna fuck it down. We can cover you waiting for them to reload So you could pop up or somebody's yelling to you like hey, there's someone behind you or there's like yeah I think hearing's probably pretty important, but let's let her yelling to you like, hey, there's someone behind you or there's, yeah, I think hearing's probably pretty important. But let's let her fail before you fucking, before you bash her up. Well, what if it falls? I've got nothing to do with it. I know, you don't have to wait.

I know you do. I know you do. Will you fall down? I know what argue with passion. It has to be real in my mind. But there's a brighter story. A brighter story. Yeah, there's a blind pig me who they're hiring as an airline pilot. Yay diversity. Tell them Steve. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha- We're nearly in a pound of food I can't see, and I got your pants in the night And we're here, dogs, and we're

On the boys' duke Kill the air, tear it up Swap off and go on Now I'm a white hood and still Like the fuck a lot of summer ones Never ended the worst No, no, no Anything I think is gonna be

Bob and me I gotta be original I'm a perpetrator Create another dose To a duplicate of I gotta be original I'm a perpetrator creating other doors to a duper-catal I can't see you bitchin' hell I'm a perpetrator creating another door to a duper-catal I can't see you bitchin' hell

I'm a perpetrator creating another door to a duper-catal I can't see you bitchin' hell I'm a perpetrator creating another door to a wide Cause my shit is hot and there's no hype up My shf's in ainess, I'm getting suffisable You tell the whole universe That I'm a bitch and a nerd It's over

I wanna figure out a news now And I'm a bitch and I should never run See I'm a bucket for a second I'm the one that stops us I'm the one you stay with Yeah, I can play a game of the world Screamable, what does it mean? I'm a liar Yeah, I can play a god of all world Crippin' for the world, what is the way of life? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I gotta be original

You see I gotta be originalI'm a man, a little bit about the next day. I'm going to be a little bit about the next day. I'm going to be a little bit about the next day. I'm going to be a little bit about the next day. I'm going to be a little bit about the

next day. I'm going to be a little bit about the next day. I'm going to be a little bit about the next day. Alright, we're ready for some dyslexia. Everybody ready and got your pen and paper ready? Well, first off, right off the bat, I gotta let you know that it's been way too easy. Every single person who listens, I think, is emailing in and get the answers right and that's not what I'm interested in. I'm interested in challenging the listeners.

So that's why it's gonna get a lot harder this week. As well as we're going back to the original rules where the first word is the last word. Get it? All right. Well anyway, if you're not interested in playing the game and you just want to get yourself a skull, you can go to tellumsteve.merchtape.com and you know what are yourself a skull? I mean right now, I mean, they're going fast. I, if you're on the fence and you have an order one, you might want to place your order right about now because I'm not sure if these skulls are going to be in stock.

I could see that I see them selling out by easily the end of the end of the year, not this year, but probably the end of the following year. But like I said, if you're interested, please go to tellmstevedaiv.merchstable.com and what are yourself up a skull. All right, back to dyslexia, the clues from last week were don't crawl, don't crawl, and that would have been Durand Durand. Clue number two, immoral sisters, and that was righteous brothers. And finally, clue number three was doubt yes less, and that was faith no more. Pretty easy, pretty easy. If you got it right, don't be so proud of yourself, because I think anybody could have got those right

Included and that would right now. He announced Thomas Stark He's getting a skull because he was the first one to email in the correct answers with the theme which was bands So if you want to take a shot this week I must warn you it's going to be a lot harder, but if you want to play, you email your answers to kmuse2adgmail.com. And here we go. This week's first clue is, and remember, it's completely backwards now.

Commoner constrained. That's clue number one, commoner constrained. Clue number two. Heaven out me here. Again, heaven out me here. And clue number three, definition high fewer thought. Again, heaven out me here. And clue number three, definition high, few were thought. All right, so send your answers in to cavemeos2.gmail.com

and you might win yourself a mini Prussian Kissing Skull. But there is also a new rule being implemented this week when sending in your answers if you include a what's wrong with Tom Steve Dave you are automatically disqualified. Okay, but of course you can absolutely include praise accolades and compliments and also in address. Please, please, please, include an address. Good luck. I'm kidding!