Tell Em Steve-Dave - #511: G-Spot and C-Man
Episode Date: March 15, 2022Bry has to explain death to Sage, the boys play Quinny's Choice....
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I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you.
I'm gonna go to the square and leave you. I'm gonna go to the square and leave you. I'm gonna go to the square and leave you. I'm gonna go to the square and leave you. I'm gonna go to the gland guy for you.
You know, as long as it doesn't bother me, I don't give a fuck. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha myself me, bruy. We got a full house here today, man. We got the, uh, the Makin' Hey AV Club
here. Tommy Lincoln and Chuck and Rupert and Mary Beth. And what I'm wondering is where
they all required to purchase something in order to stay here and hang out and watch, just
like you used to at this stage, because they should be. We got some weather out there,
man. You're right, Q. Yeah, no concern for your for your safety And it's got the wrang little little punch through some mouths, you know, sleep like that. Yeah
I was
Tell them what how to occasion to go out to dinner with the
Walt and the lovely Miss Flanagan you went out to the go yeah with the Franks. Where'd you go?
Texas Roadhouse. Mm-hmm. It was good, too. Yeah damn
When I told Walter story and I'm curious to hear your your input here you were right Texas Roadhouse. It goes good too. Yeah. Damn.
When I told Walter's story, I'm curious to hear your input here.
You were right.
That was right?
Yeah, I thought so.
I knew it.
I knew it.
Yeah.
I guess we can go through the formality of the story if you want, but that's my answer.
Well, you've known Sage your whole life.
I have.
Sage came home not too long ago and got off the bus beside herself.
This is a kid who's usually upbeat, cheery, happy.
Tears in her eyes, extremely upset so much so that she can't even get out what's bothering
or what she gets off the bus.
So Mary Beth's like, you know, what's wrong?
What's wrong?
And she's just like the bus driver, like the bus driver had done something, but she either,
for some reason she didn't want to tell us what the bus driver had done.
Well, that's not great.
Yeah, I know.
I feel like it was probably something like a girl, like somebody took her seat and then
though the bus driver didn't side with her or something, like probably something along
those lines, because that seems to upset her.
You know, she's sort of like telling us what happened Mary Beth is like,
you want me to go beat her up?
And she turns around, she goes, no, him.
And points to me, she goes, he has a gun.
So this is the second time
that she's talked about shooting somebody.
She doesn't understand what...
I don't think she understands the finality
of pulling a gun on
somebody and then discharging it. Wow. So what's the
question here? What do you do about a kid like this? She's
out of control. Have you had a talk with her about how guns
aren't safe and how they're dangerous and all that. Every
since she was little. Like there was a stretch where like
she would be like if I had the if I had the gun out for
whatever reason, she would be like, if I had the gun out for whatever reason,
she would be like, no, not how you like,
she would be able to put it on.
Yeah, like going crazy.
Yeah, it was Sam.
Yeah.
I like dancing from foot to foot and shit.
Now, every since she was very little,
she understands like the danger of guns,
which is what makes me think she's like,
I want this bitch ended.
Yeah, does she understand death? Do you's like, I want this bitch ended. Yeah.
Does she understand death, do you think?
That I don't think so.
Well, that's what's going on.
Is there a time in the time, you know, are you going to explain what death is or is it just
better to just let her not?
Well, eventually it's going to happen where like, like I thought I thought I would have
had to explain with Princess Mitch, but then Princess Mitch pulled through and survived. So the only thing she's ever
had die was a goldfish called Fifi that she didn't really care about so much. Right.
Well, our father, but she was two years old. So she would have never understood that.
Would you bring in the, would you bring in the heaven aspect to make it feel a little bit less terrifying?
I think.
And as much as I don't believe in it, I think it may be a good idea to tell a kid like that.
Like, yeah, grandma, grandpa, whomever isn't around anymore, but lucky.
So then you should have more understanding for people who clinked at it, even if they're
not special
needs.
I want you to finish that sentence.
So when I see a congregation at a church, I'm like, what we're dealing with here.
No, I didn't mean it, but I just say it.
You see the comfort in why it's so, you know, people want to believe in that, you know?
Yeah, I don't know why I was, I don't know if I was raised that way or I was born cynical, but like I
don't have, I wish I did. I wish I had that ability to have that kind of faith and that kind of like,
it's gonna be fine. I did when I was on pills. I have been on a on a kick looking up people who have died and come back and have been
to heaven.
And I have desperately want them to come on tell them Steve, I want to talk to them.
I just don't know how to get in touch with them or to or to get them on the show.
I'm wondering maybe with with with all the full house here, maybe we can.
One of these guys was no time to tell me like that.
I get that trash.
To find somebody who wrote a book that went that died and went to heaven and came back, because
I want to talk to that person.
I really want to know what what what heavens like.
You don't have a name though.
You don't have anybody.
There's many people who have, I mean, you can look, you can look up.
There's probably like 10 of them on YouTube right now.
It always seems to be the very typical like I was on the operating table
Yeah, I saw it light at the end of the tunnel
Yeah, but then they explained that away is like the drugs and the light above them as they're operating and all that shit
Mm-hmm. I even found somebody who went to hell. Oh, yeah, he died went to hell and he was like changes whole life because he really was like
That's the guy I want to talk to I want to hear what the description of hell is from
him. Dude, hell metal wasn't. He says it was quite the nightmare trip.
Where is this guy?
Was one what it's expected. Where is he? He's an American.
Yeah, but like, what part of the country? Yeah. Oh, I, I, I don't think we'd
get him in the studio unless he's in New Jersey, but I mean,
we can get him to Skype and I thought, yeah, he talks about how, you know, he like a heat
that you wouldn't imagine that you can't even put into words, the smell.
What's the name of his book? Are you talking about hell or the dogs farting in the office?
I don't remember the name of the book, but like when I, all my YouTube feeds now are people
who died who came back because I've been looking up so many of them and there's one, one
guy who went to hell and came back.
Yeah, I'd love to talk to that guy.
When you, that would be so interesting, you know, and maybe, you know, it changes how
you proceed with your life after you hear somebody who went through it.
Do you think what you do on a daily basis?
Anything is hell worthy no, I don't think so. Is it having worthy? There's a difference?
Well, does the needle just I might end up in them both you just can't be like go slide on mind and do anything bad today
I I should get be able to be able to get you don't eat a lot of money to put okay. There you go
Like it's kind of passive, but still easy man
I don't need a lot of money to put. Okay, here you go.
Like it's kind of passive, but still.
Is that the lazy man's way?
Yeah.
The lazy man's way.
Right.
Haved with dollar bills.
Is it earned money?
Is it something your account, account,
and I suggested is this a tax thing?
Is it right off the, no.
No, okay.
All right.
Yeah.
God will know if you hit it on that.
No, no, no.
No, no, no.
No, because I knew you were getting that.
No.
No, it's like whenever it's like so fucking cold out that I can't even walk to my car, I'm always glad. No, because I knew you were getting that. No. It's like, whenever it's so fucking cold out
that I can't even walk to my car,
I always worry about people sleeping on the street,
so then I'll go down there.
Oh, okay.
The stuff like there you go.
That's the best.
I thought you were gonna say,
like, in your driveway and you wouldn't be able
to back out.
Yeah.
Well, they're not a lot of my drive.
Move it, hobo.
Yeah, I don't want them anywhere in the,
no, not near my house, of course not.
No, that's not the case.
Not my backyard.
That's the same. We're front yard. Yeah. No, it's not your turn. Not my backyard. That's the same.
We're front yard.
No, but yeah, like I'll do that or, you know, donate to animals or, you know, the Ukraine,
you know, people's homes getting destroyed.
So I don't know if God would be like, I mean, you see the top of God, it's like, well,
you could have given more.
Where's any amount good?
I feel that you're always going to come up short.
Yeah, you know, everybody. No one's going to, no one's going to be perfect because,
and there's only one perfect being. So that's what he's told. So he's, yeah, you have to just
hope you did enough at the end of the day. Yeah, I guess. I mean, it's, I guess it's got to be up
to you, right? I mean, look, you can't run around trying to fix everybody else's life You just can't do that. It's not even I don't think it's morally correct
Try and do that because what about your life? It's very arrogant to think like I got all the answers
Yeah, yeah, and if that's the case, I'm quite the opposite. I don't think I have any answers to anything
Well then you donate money and it's getting skimmed and shit who came up with the 10% tithing who do you think you are without the church?
Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I don't know what you're talking about. Well, you're supposed to give 10% of your income to the church. Oh, oh, yeah
That probably was some cult leader. Mm-hmm. Yeah, probably. Oh, no, I think all leaders like I would need to donate a hundred percent
Angel wives
Yeah, isn't it weird? I listen to a book about Jim Jones called the Raven and the shit like look
I didn't want to go to church to begin with when I was a kid and I never went when I was an adult
But you get like adults like Jim Jones being like yeah, your wife. She's mine now and and male
Adults being like okay. Yeah, and then him being like half sex with each other instead and I'm like okay
And then oh my god and then your wife is also sex with each other instead and I'm like, okay, and then oh my god
And then your wife is also like since you've been led to believe and you 100% believed that Jim Jones is a god
So lend how do you have when she comes back from her evening with Jim Jones and he's done with her now
She's yours again round two you'll never you'll never live up to Jim Jones because you're not because he's so much higher than
Than a normal human being in their eyes.
I'm talking about.
But maybe like, maybe she's like,
well, I thought I would think for a, for a demigod,
he would have performed a little better.
Well, that's how, maybe how a demigod performs.
He just, you just, whatever happens,
you twist it to make it.
Yeah, it would just be like, well, if you were hotter,
I would have performed more.
Send on you, go take care of yourself.
Yeah. We're care of yourself.
We're gonna have fitness. Wait, the guys, the guys then turn to homosexual I love being that cult. Yeah, it's said in the book that they were that lonely.
I don't know if it was that they were that lonely or Jim Jones was just some,
like, a sadist stories like I know what else I can make them do.
Like, I'm in salt injury. Not only gonna fuck their wives,
but I'm gonna make them fuck each other. Oh, I didn't read that book.
I didn't read it.
I saw a lot of documentaries.
I never heard that aspect of the...
I'll see if I can find it,
because I have the book and I'll listen to it on a...
Ooh, yeah.
I never heard any of that of that.
I think that's big, Cole leaders taking the wives.
Yes, yeah, but the other thing that you're mentioning...
Oh, banging each other.
Well, like, you know, having other thing that you're mentioning. Oh bang on each other. Oh, like, you know having guys, you know
Yeah, you know just all the sudden now that you know he's licked the switch and now he wants to see them go at it
Well, I don't think he was watching. I think he's like you guys go be with each other. I mean, I don't know if there was like
Well, maybe
He maybe he didn't mean sex
Go be with each other. Maybe well, no, no, those are my words. Oh, okay Those are my words. Yeah mean sex. Go be with each other. Maybe. Well, no, no, those are my words.
Oh, okay. Those are my words. You know, like, be with each other. You know, to be. I'm talking about
docking. Yeah. So you think a simple explanation of heaven is the way to go. I don't even know
she can get her head around it though. Oh, yeah, I think, you know, you present the picture
of it's paradise, it's everything, you know,
you know, you know, the picture is.
The clouds just give it the standard.
Run the classics by her.
I was just gonna tell her, Bill,
like grandma doesn't wanna see you anymore. Yeah, now every weekend she goes to either
Grandma's house or her mother's house. Yeah, she's like, yeah, she's gotten into this thing where she's like it's the weekend
Wow, and she's like every Friday I take her up. We stop in McDonald's get her some McDonald's for a snack
Bring her to pams or bring her to my sisters. That's it. That's like her weekend
And I tell her I'm like you can stay home if you want.
You don't have to go anywhere and stick now.
I want to go.
She's like, this house is crooked, I want to out.
Yeah, she's like, I want to stay in this shittles.
Let me ask you about the McDonald's, if you don't mind.
True, just because I've been craving McDonald's
like fucking insanely.
I haven't had a Big Mac in like 10 years.
Wow, I really fucking want one.
Are you eating Big Macs? Am one. Are you eating big Macs?
Am I?
Are you eating big Macs?
I'm not.
Can you describe what a big Mac tastes like to me?
Big Mac, and the last time I had it was like,
I don't know, like six months ago we went,
something like the all three of us went,
we stopped by.
It's pretty good.
Yeah, that's pretty good.
That's why I don't get McDonald's too good.
In heaven, you?
Yeah.
It's a steady diet of big max
Anchor and man yeah
Once you the thing is I think you should give in to it. Yeah, because once you eat it You'll be like I won't don't need this for another 10 years. Really? Yeah, that's why it is good
But it's after afterwards the way you feel like it sits heavy in your stomach
Yeah, and you feel a little bit guilty because you're like I just ate like two days worth of calories in one meal
Don't eat the bread like me. I don't know man
I think you just got to go for the whole thing man the bread's part of it, you know for me
But maybe you can just get that little bit of taste, you know, without the bread
And you'll have that guilt then yeah, just have a plain burger with nothing on it
Live Lord special sauce on the one. Yeah, special sauce is fucking good and the fries are
When those fries cut if they're salted properly when they come out of that fire man
They are I believe they are unparalleled in the world of fast food fries. Yeah, pretty good. I guess we're just going to have to do it after the show
raps. We'll just go to the house. That's like when I bring her by like she you know she
gets she gets a couple burgers, she gets her fries and her coke and I have to smell it the
whole way to Pam's house and I'm like, God damn it. And then she like wants to give
me fries. I'm like, no, no, that's all right. You know, it'll kill daddy. Yeah.
Look at me. I'm halfway to death already.
You know, you're trying to nudge me along.
Yeah.
Might as well pull out a gun on me like the goddamn bus driver.
But it must be nice like to like have the weekend to yourselves.
Newly made. Yeah.
Yeah. Chillin' out.
Yeah. It's like, you don't have to, because like most of the time I would say
80% of the time she's doing her own thing
The other 20% of the time like Mary Beth has to make her snack or make her dinner or she wants to play Minecraft or do this or that
But most of the time she just wants to be on her own
It's the like every morning every morning I get up at seven make her her eggs in which before school and all that other shit
It's like not having to do that. That's like, it's nice because making that
egg sandwich there are times when I would be like holy shit like this is, this is like
Groundhog Day. Yeah, it's like every fucking day. It's the same fucking thing. Make the,
make the egg sandwich, bring the egg sandwich to her. Get her clothes ready.
Fucking y'all already got dressed because she's taken too long. Yeah, I like all this shit
And it's just the countdown for your next morning
That you know all over the time or starts
Yeah
You like that wall?
The cute little get together.
Well this week.
Yeah.
Wrestling party.
Pay Per View.
Really?
Yeah.
You're in WrestleMania?
No, that's coming up.
That's April, that's April 2nd.
This was just a AW regular, like monthly or whatever they do.
It paid Per View.
Nice.
Yeah, it was fun.
It was, you know, I'm trying to get this guy into wrestling, man.
I'm trying to get him that.
I got to say the one guy
What was his name Dan for for Dan house and Dan house and yeah, is the guy you mentioned mother time?
Yeah, he's like a fucking best man. He's got like supernatural
Yeah, he's got he put curses on people
He's very barren like and is you know
He has this thing with teeth where one of his moves is like he brings it like a jar of teeth to the ring.
And then when you're down he'll take, he'll take teeth out of the jar and put it in your mouth
because you're only used, the idea of being, you're only used to a certain amount of teeth in your
mouth. So when you have the extra teeth in your mouth, you get confused and you can't wrestle properly.
And then- Is that hygienic? I don't think wrestling in these volumes they're bleeding each other's mouths and she'll be like, I'm sure they're
old teeth I mean you know or prop teeth but whatever I mean yeah the rest
are has to agree to this. I mean I guess you can play it two different ways you
can either play it like he means it and buy into it.
Right.
And people like fucking crazy.
The amount of 15, which is what I would do.
Because it's funny.
Right.
Or I guess you could just be annoyed that you have teeth in your mouth and be
spin a mountain.
That's any distraction.
How does he get their mouths open to him?
Yeah, they're on the ground.
Put them in, shove them in the mouth.
You know, it's just, but like that's the type of guy
Dan housing is.
So yeah, he came out.
Yeah, I love, I really liked him a lot.
He just like he creeps around.
He has a very Ren field like demeanor to him, you know,
it was pretty funny.
A lot of the, a lot of the stuff prior to that.
Oh, actually the final round was pretty, there's,
what was the other guys that it was C.M. Punk versus.
Oh, M.J.F.
M.J.F. It's a guy who comes out with this burberry scarf on and shit he's like a
long island douchebag's his character any any just like mocks the audience and
shits all over the audience and I gotta say it was pretty fun how big was the
shindig
ten ten people throughout the day people coming to go into now are you allowed to be
spoken to all the while the matches going on are you so into it that like you know
bothered or no it's okay party man like you know certain matches you can't
take your eyes off
like that one that is talking about uh... see them punk versus mjf was a dog collar
match
which is like
they they each put on a dog collar and then they attest by a chain.
And they have to wrestle the whole match with the chain attached to each other.
So they can't run away.
They can't get away.
They use the chain to beat each other and whip each other and stuff like that.
Yeah.
Dog collar match.
Uh-huh.
Yeah, it seems very like a cinemish.
You know, a lot of blood in that one.
It's actually too much blood.
After a while, I'm like, all right. It couldn't have all been real, right?
It's all real. It wasn't all real. Yeah, there was speculation that it could have been blood packs like on one person said that
No, I like that person very much
Remember a wrestler called Abdul of the butcher. Yeah, of course
Now he used to cut his forehead with a razor blade
Yeah, they all used to do it back in the day. So is that real? They really would cut their razor blade?
Or they would use a blood pack you think they have used blood pack, but like it it's never they most of the times
That you've seen people bleeding and it's for real
And they would cut themselves with a razor to get a little little either pre slice it before the match
So it can hit right or just some of you know these guys are fucking tough they'll take the hit like the if you over
ring on and stuff you gouged the forehead and stuff like that they'll take it
damn yeah real blood you but you maintain it was real too it looked pretty
real I mean you see it spurting out of his forehead yeah it did look pretty
real yeah it's not disturbing you think for kids to see growing men spurting blood
When I was a kid and watched it wasn't
Sturving at all. I mean I will say this I did comment that at the thing on Sunday that when I was a kid and you were watching matches on TV
It was like old, you know, you didn't really make out the fine details now this fucking 4k
You can't see the plot like spurting you know, So it is, I don't like it as much.
It's a little, I wish they wouldn't cut each other as much.
Really?
Yeah, it's a lot of worry about the wrestlers.
Do you really like health wires?
Yeah, but how about the ref and the other wrestlers though?
I mean, again, is that hygienic to be bleeding all over each other?
The wrestlers don't care.
They will put it in their mouths, they will fucking
they'll have to hand them in.
They'll have blood in their mouth.
The other, another wrestler's blood is all in their mouth.
It happens all the time.
It's not even a thing.
And then, and the refs, you'll see when the blood starts
put on gloves, they'll put on like plastic gloves.
So I guess they wanna protect themselves somewhat.
But the other wrestlers,
you think they have to have like tests constantly?
I would hope so.
HIV.
Sure, can you get AIDS that way?
I don't, I think it's gotta be blood,
the blood contact, right?
Well, blood in your mouth.
Right, but this still gotta be an entry point.
Like if you have a little cut in your mouth or something.
Well, if you post it down into your belly,
it wouldn't, it wouldn't, oh really,
how about, because it would,
Your body would destroy it.
It's not like it's a hardy virus, right?
Like it'll die outside of the outside,
but it's really like,
it's gotta be like blood, blood contact.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Yeah, I guess that's why I like,
or some kind of fluid, right?
That's why I like the,
the gay community.
I will tell you what, dude,
I don't fucking know shit about it.
I'm just, you know,
what I've heard, I don't know.
No one listen to me from medical advice.
I just know it's something's something like that fluid to fluid
Yeah, nice why you can get it from like
I'm like an infected load. Well, yeah, but fucking somebody right wasn't that the whole thing
But I thought that was where the blood came in like tears. Oh like my good like micro tears and stuff
I don't know you don't know either
I'm like for like it started like that whole epidemic started when we were in school
and I'm shockingly uninformed about it.
Yeah.
Well, you knew you weren't in any danger, I guess, right?
I thought I wasn't in any danger because at the time it was like, hey man, it's only for
gay people.
I mean, that's the way it was back then.
Like you didn't pop it up in the champagne bottle, what about your business?
Well, thank you, like, for your stuff.
Dentists were given it out too.
You know, there was a scare.
But I will say like he enjoyed the wrestling.
It was fun.
I saw the moment where you started paying attention.
And I think it was when Dan Housen came out and whatever, because I like the heels.
The heels are fun.
The best man.
Yeah.
Sage is real into wrestling too.
She loves
jumping around the room, screaming,
play an Xbox and shit, all that stuff. She's loud. That's when you
know she's home.
Quiet weekends. Somebody who didn't
show up who was supposed to be
other was Joderosa. Joderosa was
supposed to be there. He didn't just not show Ryan that, that, that, that, that,
he just didn't know show.
Yeah, but, but he at least sent a text and was like, yeah,
I can't, I can't even write it.
Joderosa couldn't make it.
I will be on a chip, chip, chip,
and this Sunday, I believe he drops it with Joderosa
for anybody who wants to watch it on YouTube.
But I was thinking about the Rosa and his sandwich shop.
And I'm like Jared Fogel gets out of jail in probably seven or eight years.
Yeah.
He could get him for a song.
Yeah, but what a message he is sending.
First of all, I'm a man.
I'm an investor in that business.
I would like to, no, I'm suggesting this to you.
Yeah, let me not do that
Yeah, I mean I just think it's a no fly. What is that guy? Do when he gets out of prison
He's still rich
He's still has money. They said his his he had a value of 15 million when he
What from all those commercials? I mean he was on those commercials for like ten years back end on the commercials
No, I mean, I just guess they paid him well.
They paid him that much money.
Yeah, he would even have a value of like $15 million.
Then he had to pay like a million and a half to the survivors of his bullshit
and then like $250,000 in fines and then whatever his divorce
from him. So like when he gets out, he may still be a millionaire. I don't know.
Yeah, that's for sure. If he could, yeah. Wow. So he could just run. He could just go down, tell the America and fucking chill and live like a king for us. It was like that
hard. That's right. It doesn't seem right. Is that justice? Oh, no, not really. We're
not there. Roan and lives and sure. Yeah. I mean, he is very famous. Yes, very famously a pedophile infamous. Yeah, in Thomas, right?
so
It's not like you could have a good life in the United States, right?
What do you do if you see him? I mean, I think I would just be like holy shit this fucking this chair
I would if I was him I get plastic surgery and change my name grow beard
That's what I would do. I wouldn't be going around being like, hey, remember me. He comes to join us.
He has about there with a sandwich board on.
Yeah. He's checking out all the kids that walk by.
Oh, it's horrible.
So yeah, I think probably to roast it, so it'd say no to that as well.
Yeah, I think so.
So you know what he would say yes to.
What's that?
Paracons.
Oh, shit, we got an ad?
Sure do.
Broom, broom.
Let's see.
A lot of people didn't even make resolutions this year.
And you know what?
I mean, it's March.
I don't know why this copy is still from January,
but I so I apologize everyone, but it doesn't matter.
It's timeless.
It's making your own, like they say in every. What about those farting dogs? It's remind me so I apologize everyone, but it doesn't matter. It's timeless. It's making your own like they say in every
What are all those farting dogs? It's remind me because I got to say something about that in a second
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If there was a word that was better than love,
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I would think so.
Yeah.
I don't know if there is a word though.
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That supersedes love. Yeah, but if there is, that's the word I would like to use. We're not educated enough here to know what word is more than love, but that's it. Love plus
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save 15% on Raycon's buyraycon.com slash TESD. Nice. So what, the dogs farting. I saw on Twitter that somebody suggested that maybe
they need their anal glands expressed. Have you heard this? No. And if you decide to
do it, I got a guy. I got an anal gland guy for you. And what are the expressed? What does
that mean? I think what they do is they basically shove their thumb in the dog's ass and there's
some kind of sack in there that they press.
Get them probably, wouldn't they?
Hey, good, I'm coming here for a second.
And they press on this sack, and I,
from what I understand, expressing anal glands.
Oh, very smelly thing.
That's, that's, that's what I've,
that's what I've heard that.
It's like hell on earth when, when you smell that smell.
Yeah, I think it's like an extra $30 at groomers
to have that done.
Now, do you think this would help the dogs farting or is this,
that's what I saw on Twitter?
No, I don't think so.
I think it's just that, you know,
I've heard that Frenchies are naturally gassy.
Oh, are they really?
That's what I read.
So don't put up a good time,
put up their thumb up your dog's ass for no reason.
Yeah, I was gonna do it anyway.
Oh, you weren't,
because they don't look in your eyes, like yet reason. Oh, I wasn't gonna do it anyway. Oh, you weren't? No, I don't.
I don't have the same sense of smell anymore,
and I don't smell anything.
I truly don't smell anything.
And can you still taste stuff?
Yeah, yeah, but you know I can smell that wood
when of that gift that you got.
So it's almost as if I've become immune to that smell.
I don't smell it.
My wife complains about it. I don't smell it. My wife complains about it.
I don't smell it.
Yeah, and getting them is always making comments.
But like, you know, as long as it doesn't bother me,
I don't give a fuck.
I don't give a fuck.
I don't give a fuck.
So they could keep doing whatever they're doing
and I don't really have a problem with it.
There you go.
The thumb up your ass, Cooper, you're lucky.
Yeah.
Or unfortunate.
I guess the pencil was where you look at it.
Yeah.
But who's your guy?
Oh, my nephew Hunter.
Yeah.
He works at an animal hospital.
Oh, okay.
And he's been, he started out as like low man on the totem pole
and he's gotten up to thumb ass.
So wait, so there's something lower than sticking your fingers and the dogs?
I think so.
Like, you don't have the skill to do it.
Like I think you have to develop the skill in order to do it.
So like before that, you're like, say cleaning up the dog shit.
I'd rather do that. I would.
Yeah.
I did that didn't have my finger in there.
He also said that you, there's a team where like say like this, say an animal bite somebody
and they're like, well, we got to test it for rabies.
You can be part of the team that goes in and cuts the head off
that animal.
Oh, like, because you know, you have to cut the head off
to test it for the rabies.
And you get an extra 25 bucks in your paycheck
if you're a part of that team.
Wait a minute.
So if they're taking care of this animal hospital,
so if while they're examining another animal,
if the next room over,
if that animal, if a pet bites the doctor,
they're gonna go in another room and cut the head off.
No, I don't think that's the way it works.
I think if it's a standard, is it?
No, no, no.
You're talking about it, something in a wild,
like a squirrel bit you.
But you'd have to bring the squirrel with you.
You would have to get the squirrel?
No, sometimes it doesn't really happen all that often.
But sometimes he said, I don't know,
it's the only kid that had done it a couple of times, right?
I think sometimes if pets are like dogs, mostly dogs, I don't know, it's the other guy who had done it a couple of times, right? I think sometimes if pets are like dogs, mostly dogs I think are...
Or, you know...
What?
Can you imagine that?
You know, you bring your pet in, your pet doesn't want his, want to thumb up his ass, it kind of takes a nip at the doctor.
Next day, oh, sorry, sorry buddy, we gotta go and take him to know, and to capitate him.
Yeah. And this guy right here here he's gonna make 25 bucks
I don't know about that I would have to think it'd be like like you would
bring in maybe a possum but again you have to bring the
uh... crack wounds yeah you have to bring the animal in with you
yes I won't imagine that they're going out looking for the one that bit
him yeah he said he's done it a couple times and he has been, I think it's only
said if the animal is suspected to have rabies.
Think about it. I think about it first. Did you question this at all?
Yeah, of course. Okay. Imagine what the room has to be prepared for for
to capitating an animal. Okay. Think of the the mental distress that would
put on the on whoever's doing it for the rest of it.
Let alone the rest of the week just for that day.
Well, it's a doctor that does it.
It's not like he does it.
Okay, but he's still in the room.
He's still in the room.
He's assisting.
Yeah.
Anyway, he can, which is probably just to look horrified.
Right.
It's to be like, I can't believe this is what I do for a living.
Think about the mess.
Think about the, think about the,
I mean, there's no, in 2022, there's no way other way to find out
if this animal's rabbit than to capitating.
I don't fix it, I think that's the way it goes.
Let me see, oh, really, really, really,
I'm gonna see some.
I just can't believe that we haven't found
better ways yet though.
I mean, what happens if he took Fido in and,
I think it's, I think it's,
I think it's, they cut his head off and he didn't have rabies though. I think it's, yeah, I know, rightido in and I think it's I think it's cut it out. They cut his head off and he didn't
have rabies though. I think it's yeah, I know, right? I don't
think it's the first thing. I'm looking it up and it says
that it's like if there's a rabies issue. So it has to be
within the scope of a rabies situation, not the dog bit you
it's right. The dog because he said he's gotten bitten a couple
times like at work. And I don't think they just lumped the
heads off right away. No, I would not
Want to promote that fucking animal hospital. That's so quick to just fucking start taking heads off. Yeah
Here's your 25 bucks
You 25 bucks is not nearly enough you would think to make up for the
the absolute horror as you remove a sentient creature's
head.
Well, I don't think it's alive at the time.
They put them down.
They put them, they, they euthanize them.
That's a cut that off.
Yeah, it's not like they have many kids.
Think about it though.
How fucked up that would be.
I would want to do it.
No, but somebody has to do it.
I mean, vets put animals down all the time.
Yeah. Yeah, but it would do that
You know with a shot and you're petting them as they go into right there already dead though though
So let me see procedure
I'm taking the head off with a big cleaver. I think though doctors don't see it the same way as us, you know
I think it's I think it's a proxie from scientific
professional medicinal medical kind of I think it's a pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro pro I have my Quinnies choice Quinnies choice game. This is if you guys want to jump into this awesome
This is a this is all a BQ. Yeah compose game here. Well, it's it's a sequel
You know what I'd love to do I'd love to knock out this one. Let's do it. Yeah, I'm molested
Quinnies show is grew up to you by
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Carav is the carav isn't charging me. They're my boss, all right?
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Now fucking Quinney's choice, goddammit.
Well, this is gonna, this is gonna,
this is gonna turn day around. Okay. Well this is gonna this is gonna this is gonna turn
Dayrun. Okay. You're gonna love this because a lot of this was knowing you'd have to be giving answers to
them so it's great. So the game was it's just two terrible options like Sophie's choice right
she had to give up her son or her daughter. Right well probably yeah that that was what the
game was based on the original
game yes so it's just I I wrote out these situations I made a choice so what I
would do in them I wrote the answers down to ensure that that there was no
shenanigans and I'm gonna present these 10 I came up with 10 wall wow these 10
situations to you guys and you guys see how well we know you how well you know
me whoever gets the most right gets the title of my best friend
Wow, should we have get them in here if you want get them you ought to play give you a second
People have been loving
the G-man
The G-man Kim oh really I didn't know he really the
We haven't been all based on god the cool got you um but they have they have been loving his
appearances lately like demanding more get them that's what's been missing they
said the secret sauce well i don't like hearing that but uh by 12 years later we
figure out what's missing uh yeah but but I do think the show's better when it gets around.
Sure.
Yeah.
Why does it do this?
Good.
Good.
Do you like G-Man?
Because I also came with another nickname for him, G-Spot?
Ooh, G-Man.
If we're looking to make him cool, I think G-Man is probably.
Well, G-Spot would be like people will automatically assume you know his key urn at nickname them
Who would have seen that though? It's dangerous, but people don't know them would be like new listeners. You would be like oh shit your nicknames G spot
Yeah, who's this G spot?
But many and why?
Many people couldn't find me and some people wouldn't believe I ever existed
I love them though.
Welcome to G spot baby. He knows what he's doing.
What do you like, Betty?
Like G-Man or G-Spot?
Whatever, Mousia.
All right.
What about Gidem?
What have you just stick with Gidem?
Yeah.
That was already my deck name.
This is the deck name for the deck name, right?
All right.
Okay.
So we'll just dive right in, right?
Okay.
I'm offered the ability to turn into any animal that I would like for the rest of my life to and fro like Beast Boy. I could turn it to Hawk one day, a horse another day.
Okay, I'm offered the ability to turn it to any animal that I that I would like for the rest of my life, but I would only able to get an erection while in animal form in animal form. In human form, I am a soft, limp dick
for the rest of my days,
and no amount of blue chew will help me.
No, blue chew probably would,
just they're so sponsored, right?
Of maybe.
No, that's okay, awesome.
This is awesome, man.
There's magic.
Ah, magic, man.
I don't like it.
Blue chew can't even help me.
Yeah, we got the nod off from our,
okay, from the person who handles our ads and blue shoes no longer with us
So
They still work right so if I'm an eagle I can I can get an eagle erection right I just as I can't get any more human birds get erection
There's something that's bothering me here
What's bothering? It's a blinking light and I don't know why yeah, so it's choosing between this line and a USB in
Okay, you know, you're not worrying about it all right recording. Yeah, so it's choosing between this line and a USB-in. Okay, you're not worrying about it, all right?
It's recording?
Yeah, it's okay.
Okay, good.
I just, I don't want to go through the next fucking 45 minutes.
I don't know if I'm going to go back on that line, because that's how it's been the whole
time, so I'm just keeping it on.
And I think that's all it is.
You want to turn it off?
I just don't want to mess anything up.
I know the feeling.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Be a bad move for the C-man.
I mean, he's a real bad guy. C-spot. I love that. The man in a G-spot. feeling yeah yeah bad move for the seaman see spot oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah okay yeah sweet cool dynamic duo so but you not, you're not sure the birds could get erection.
So, well, whatever I guess the sex is an animal.
But I'm just saying in the real world though, any bird watch you haven't seen any erections
yet?
No, I know.
I imagine they have to, right?
I don't know.
Okay.
Yeah, I never really thought about birds like.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Well, he's also, but going to what his scenario is, he loves animals. Absolutely
adores him. I mean, he cares more about like strange animals than human beings. I think
he'd love to be an animal. I think he's kinky enough that he'd want to have sex with
a human as an animal. Like a furry? No, no, if he was an animal, I think he, I don't know who he could
convince though to- There's people who help him out as an animal and then fuck him with his
heart. Like every animal he is has a fucking raging heart on it. So you think I would be like,
I would meet girls in like bars or whatever and just find out if they're down for fucking a horse
or something like that? I mean, you have to probably go south of the border to find these ladies are into that.
But yeah, I think you'd have to be like bars around a veterinary clinic, something like that.
Or, well, like a horse bar, a horse bar.
We were just talking about like, you remember, I was asking you, why are girls so into horses?
And tell us your theory.
Oh, they just like that big thing between their, you know, that big animal switch when they're like.
To set this with 100% like,
they like all that power right there.
You have heard that right?
That girls are really into horses like, like,
like girls always want to own a horse.
Always.
I mean, I know women who own horses.
Right.
But it's a thing that like girls tend to grab like young girls. But if you're a horse owner, you're, you're in who own horses. Right, but it's just thing that like girls tend to grab, like young girls.
But if you're a horse owner,
you're in love with horses.
If you're like,
No, no, not necessarily.
I think you're saying like,
if you're a female, you either love horses
or you don't really care about horses,
one of the two.
It usually in, yeah,
I've noticed that from like, you know,
past girlfriends I've had,
but the farm and everything.
Right.
Yeah.
But you will never be the number one love in their life
The number one love in their life will always be their horse then it's whoever pays for the horse
Let's get back to killing some barn humor
Oh, it is totally true
Right yeah, right now there's a few people like fucking nodding our head
Right yeah right now there's a few people like fucking not in our head
Probably in Oklahoma Texas
Let's get back though to you you becoming beast when are you able to think this animal? Yeah, speak or no Yeah, I think yeah, I think I let's not you know, would you speak like it?
Sorry, can you read it one more time? Oh, so I was so distracted by this
Okay, I'm offered the ability to turn it to any animal that I would like for the rest of my life. Mm-hmm
Not permanently I could change it to Hawk one day or right this the up here the next do the next
But I'd only be able to ever get an erection while an animal form in human form
I'm a soft limp dick
for the rest of my days and no amount of blue chew will help me.
It's good, okay.
Yeah, I can't fuck while an animal.
Right.
I guess I can fuck other animals, right?
But you have, I wouldn't want to.
Mm-hmm.
I think you though for answering that honestly.
Yeah, I wouldn't want to fuck other animals.
But if I can convince a check or court to get them everyone,
to have sex with me in human form,
that would probably still be pretty good for me.
Does an erection trigger the change?
No, no, it's a conscious choice.
But in human form and nothing, dead, dead, dead,
not even a twitching dick. I want Brian to go first. I want to go first. Yeah, his ears closest to you
I want to see where how he leans
See the so it's either no sex
Sex with the person while I'm an animal or sex with animals are my only options for the rest of my life
How old are you?
Forty I turn 46 on Monday
Yeah, you probably this not that important to him anymore probably.
No, I can confirm it's important.
Yeah, I'm not thinking right about that.
Which is why I would lead to it. I agree.
I think he's like, especially lately, I've found that he's very into...
...very into animals.
Like even like, in consequentialential animals like squirrels and shit.
Like Mary Beth is the same way we went for a walk the other day down the Hudson Trail.
And I had to tell her at a certain point I'm like I don't want to hear any more of these voices when you see a squirrel. What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you do? What did you? What did you? What did you do? What did you? What did you do? What did you do? What did you? What did you do? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you? What did you No, he's a little squirrely. He's squirrely, squirrely, squirrely. Holy shit. There's a billion squirrels out there, man.
They all look the fucking same.
That's not what he doesn't.
That's not what he doesn't.
That's not what he doesn't.
A cute wince, when you said inconsequential.
Yeah, I don't like that.
He didn't like that.
He's consequential to who.
But he would become fucking, he could go on tour, turning into animals.
I mean, his bank account would fucking rise substantially as the man who could turn into
an animal.
The manable.
What is a man gains the world, the loses his penis.
Yeah.
And then does he put on live sex shows?
Well, I mean, maybe that's towards when people have grown tired.
At the end of his, like, he's like Jake Lamatta at the end
of his career.
Sit on a stool.
You're just fucking talking about what
you used to fuck as a human.
Yeah.
But I want to see you weigh in this one first
and then I might take.
Yeah, as much as he likes animals, as much as I believe
he would like to turn into an animal at time
to avoid human beings, I believe he would like to turn into an animal at time to avoid human beings
I believe he would keep his ability
Keep the penis keep the status quo not turning into animals. I think he's a man who loves to experience new
Sensations how long you've been active
new sensations. How long you've been active?
Is that right? In that way, yeah.
14?
I mean, he's never been,
I mean, this would be the only time you'd be able to turn
is when I'm gonna experience what life feels like
as a different species.
I think that would be the allure of that may be enough
to make and go like I've been doing the other thing
for decades.
I gotta look for some new kicks.
Yeah, I mean I need a new, a new g-g-gitty up.
I need a new way to, uh, feel alive.
But then he's fucked if he doesn't like it.
How the species are out there though.
Yeah, you'd be a fish one day.
I'd be a bird.
There's also near human- like animals like greater apes
Compancies I could turn into a chip and he and shave myself. I guess
How long does it let you get you could say that there's still the animals long as you want. Yeah, it's how will it's pretty cool
Power I gotta admit that
Because it's it's a cool new power
It's sensation like he can fly through the air.
Yeah, the ability to experience flight over just fucking shooting yet another load.
Yeah, who cares?
I thought you were going to say an episode of IJ.
And give him the popularity of sites like Bad Dragon,
where you can buy animal-shaped,
wow.
There are, there'll be tons of women just banging
at his door wanting to.
It's a site called Bad Dragon.
And they said, what do they offer?
It started out with dragon-shaped like dildos.
But now it's progressed to other members of the animal kingdom.
All right, so you're saying there will be some...
I like that he could get his dragons part of the animal kingdom.
Well, that's how they started, but they've since, you know,
the dolphins, there's like dolphins, dogs.
So, are you still Q from...
It's me, yeah.
I can't talk, but it's me.
So, you know there will be a segment of his audience
that would be like, I don't care if he is
Yeah, you know like a smelly fucking an eater. I'm still gonna let him go down on me. Oh totally. Yeah, I think that segment of the audience exists right now
Right, but like as a man though. I
Mean, I you know, I'm not gonna feel great about myself. I'm gonna feel like what is my purpose of being of a human
I think he's going on bro. Yeah, I think so. Well just because it's going to be so
New the like no one on the face of the earth will I've ever experienced anything like this? Oh, some have I've seen the videos online
It's
Not only animal wait what? Oh
Yeah, you never like turning into an animal. Oh, no, no, no, I'm just saying people having never heard of what
Sex with animals like mr. Hands that kind of stuff what
It was the famous case of a guy who died in Washington need a perforated colon. Oh the horse guy. Yeah
All right, Jesus. Yeah, but you're too confused. He's not having sex. He's not taking it
Yeah, you are the animal. I'm saying is that there's human beings
who are willing to engage with it.
Okay.
Yeah, and the fact that it's gonna be a sentient animal
that isn't gonna go like crazy.
Okay.
Is there any animal that you would be like,
I don't wanna turn into that.
Ooh, like in three weeks.
No, I think I probably-
I think I probably-
So fucked up looking no.
But how cool would it be to be like an optical I could do for an hour
I could just get in there and like do it
Yeah, if you don't like it, you can back up. Yeah, but you can never be a human again. No, no, he can go back
No, I can go back, but no, just my just like right right. That's what I meant
You can't go back to a normal human being like one that you have sex and shit. No, right? It's it's limb tick forever
Right, isn't there a famous like
Poor groupie thing that about it?
What a stock to somewhere
Okay, I don't I remember her even a story about some groupie with the rock twirl
All right, all right. Look, we got not more these together
You're talking about I don't know
You're going animal animal fry stands staying the same. You's not gonna take that power on. I'm gonna go animal. Okay
animal. Bryce stands, staying the same. He's not going to take that power on. I'm going to go animal. Okay. Wow, this is for, to be my best friend. What I said was I would take the animal super power
and find freaky chicks into animals. I knew you would. I knew you would. Yeah. You have that built
in audiences like, is it any possibility? Anyway, I got to be with Q. I'll take it. I think that's
that's a, but not as a bird or like as an octopus. Well I'm sure he's gonna take on like maybe the the of the form of like a big fucking great ape with a fucking massive
Yeah, massive
Ding-dong right
silverback
Well my thinking was
But you still got the ass of that fucking pink
Oh that bad food, yeah that red ass
We just don't ever let her see you from behind.
I ruined the mood.
That's my rule now, anyway.
So it's not that different.
No.
Oh.
Oh.
Yeah, my finger was like, look, man,
like nobody in the human experience
has ever turned into an animal.
I will get to do that.
How is that not better?
Then sex at this point.
Then sex, right?
Yeah. I knew it, yeah, I know it man
I felt it. I can see in your eye when you're talking about it. Yeah, yeah
Tomorrow one and one we're on our one of us is on the way
What what comes up being your best friend
Anything good? Oh come on winning your version. Once the next wrestle me
I say for a second
once the next rest of me. I say, real second.
Yeah.
All right, good one.
All right, nice start.
Okay.
He's an easy one, I think.
What I rather get bonked on the head and forget the past 10 years of my life, or get bonked
on my head and forget that sal even exists. I'm not sure this scenario coming up, you came up with this, like, is there something
in the last 10 years that you really want to forget?
No?
Subconsciously, is there something like, man, I wish I could forget.
I wish I could put that one on.
The last 10 years of life, probably the best 10 years of my life.
All right, so it seems like.
Or forget that I ever met Sal,
that I know Sal, that even exists.
So we'll be able to work on Monday,
you're like, who's this guy?
Yeah, I wouldn't have any connection to him whatsoever.
The other scenario is he didn't show up for work
because he forgot that he was on IJ.
Right.
And he called Sal, he's like, where are you at?
I'm at work, where are you at? Because you still know Sal.
Yeah?
From 10 years ago.
Well, I'm not, I wish, but no, we're 36.
Yeah, no.
Yeah.
I'm going to, I think this one's pretty cool.
I feel he would, he could though, really dig dig becoming friends
a new with Saldo.
He could dig that experience though.
Or we've grown so different as people
that the bonds that keep us together
because the lifetime of friendship won't be formed now.
You don't wanna take that chance, right?
Who would?
That's right. But 10 years ago, I would still remember him as my boy. Right.
So you wouldn't remember any of the IJ stuff. You wouldn't remember any of the tell them Steve Dave stuff. Not now. He's gonna get it. Yeah, and all of that is
is good. But what would be the downfall? You'd still have your sense of humor. You'd still be the same person.
You just say, hey, come down.
He wouldn't get funny references like, like,
Seaman and G-Spot.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I would remember getting them at all.
And his comedy from 10 years ago might be problematic nowadays.
I wouldn't even know if I can't say that.
He's able to.
What can I say?
I can't say that. What can I say?
I think there'd be like a 51st
States like type scenario where you forget
Sal, but there's a way to kind of like
show you a videotape and you could
re- catch up to speed for those past 10 years.
Yeah, you could watch IJ, all the DVDs.
Yeah, all seasons.
And you think that I would be able to just jump into that
No, no, no, no, it's not necessarily to jump into a thing, but it's a starting point. Okay. Yeah, I think the universe though
You guys are like intertwined so like no matter what happens at the end
You're you're going to connect and like let's say you have that chasm
For like you forget, say you have that chasm. Chasm?
For like, you forget, but you guys will quickly reconnect though,
even if you didn't remember him at all.
I think that's a whole world.
I know, because cells, cells, existence now
is so different from 10 years ago.
Oh, really?
Like cells are extremely busy guys.
Yeah, you would have more of an insight to this.
Sounds a busy guy.
He does a lot of like
Outside projects. I can't go on YouTube without seeing the sales face
He's fucking everywhere. So what are you waiting on again? I'm gonna take my peas and cues from you. Yeah, I think um
Oh, this is a tough one I feel like he wouldn't want to forget sale. I feel like he wouldn't want to forget any of his
good friends. But he would rather forget the last 10 years though. And everybody that I met
and became friends with him. Right. Yeah, that's true too. So are they all worth more than
sale? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. As he has he garnered any real super significant relationships that he couldn't bear to lose over
Sal, not knowing Sal, I say he's gonna go with Sal as well. He's gonna go with the
one where he remembers Sal and forgets the last 10 years.
I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say he forgets Sal. And you're gonna go with the
brother forget. You'd rather forget Sal existed and remember the last 10 years now
How the hell that's gonna?
If you're gonna work you remember selling no, you don't remember you gotta take a blind like I try to think about that my brain
Just won't it's just a damage
Wait a minute though. It feels like there's a trick question. It does right?
Because if he could remember the last 10 years, he's gonna remember sell
No, that's just going to be the one black hole in this. Okay. Yeah. I remember all the events,
but not sell. What was this guy that keeps talking over me? Yeah.
I think the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one. So he were the needs of the many.
Everybody else he's met and seen the last and his interact with him and he's helped.
Matt and the last ten years and is interact with him and he's helped. Okay.
And he's had an impact on their life.
Because you know, not realizing that you had an impact on someone's life, I think, is
would be tough.
I'm going to go, I'm going to go agree with that too. I'm going to go, all of us are going to
agree with you, rather, forget.
No, I'm going to go with you, rather, forget the, you'd rather forget the last 10 years
and remain friends with Sal.
I'm gonna go with that.
So you're saying keep the 10 years,
I mean keep Sal lose the 10 years.
Yes, he's saying.
I'm saying lose Sal, keep the 10 years.
I'm saying lose Sal,
because you can still reconnect.
If you didn't have that caveat in there,
I thought they could too, but yeah.
Walt's got it.
I'd rather lose 10 years of my life
and remember my friendship with Sal.
Have you thought this through?
I have.
I have thought it through.
What do you think?
Well, my thing being like,
if I woke up 10, from 10 years ago to now,
like if somebody told me everything that I had done
for the past 10 years,
I'd, it would be such an awesome surprise.
I'd be like, holy fuck, this is my life.
I'd go from being like, you know, a 36 year old fireman to like suddenly being like here now,
I'd still get to come here and do. None of it would go away. I just wouldn't remember it.
So I would still have the fucking, you know, all the accoutrements that I've gotten,
just it would all be new and a surprise to me, whereas I can't give up my friendship with Sal.
We would be giving it up. you would just be restarting.
But if you could, yeah, would have been saying.
You just don't know that you can, you know what I mean?
You just don't know you can.
Damn, well you're on fire.
That's fire.
Two, get him one, Brian zero.
That's surprising right out of the gate, you know, he's over two.
Big Brian.
Yes, but that's all right.
It's almost flustered by the sound.
They really did fuck me up. It stopped blinking now.
All right, let me give you let me give you one more in in the realm of like, I think you guys will get this one a little bit a little bit better.
Not better. You guys are more BC.
Not you.
There is an alien one involving sex. You want to hear that one?
Okay.
All right.
An alien lands in my yard, right? It approaches me.
It explains that I can give me secrets that will extend all human life on planet earth by 10 years
So everybody is gonna live 10 years longer and all I have to do is make love to him for a night
Also, I notice he is a space cold sore on his lips and he's he insists
On kissing while we make whoopee
Do I extend wait wait read that, wait, read that again.
Read that again. There's a very key point
when you just said that. Read that exactly as you read it.
Okay. Also, I notice he has a space cold sore on his lips
and he insists. He.
So this is nothing like that.
You're not the same species.
Right, but it's, yeah.
Oh, it's definitely a hey.
I also notice he has a space cold sore on his lips and he insists on kissing while we make whoopie
Do I extend the all life on earth by?
By ten years well, I'm gonna throw this out. I mean like
All the great space heroes who save the world and the cosmos over and over again
Captain Kirk look Luke Skywalker,
Buck Rogers, Flash Gordon, to save everybody, to give everybody 10 years of life.
Healthy years, too. Healthy years. And all I gotta do is make love.
With a space cold sore on it. They would do it. That's what a hero does.
But the medical knowledge is going to be, yeah, we just assume that the medical knowledge
for the cold sore treatment would be there.
It's like a 10-year-old.
It's like a 10-year-old.
It can't tell for at least 10 years.
Listen, you don't have that information
when you're in your back fucking yard.
There's an alien in there with a fucking heart.
Well, this is what I'm getting presented with.
And just be sure we're talking about an extraterrestrial alien.
Yeah, it's definitely an alien.
It looks vaguely human, you know.
But yeah, it's a dude, alien.
It's got all the markings of a dude. Oh, yeah. Okay.
That's a fucking dude, alien. With a space bolt. So as a you're a fireman, you have so many people on
the earth that are growing older now that you would want to be able to, you know, say that you gave them 10 more extra years of healthy life your parents all
Your loved ones and you were to
hung up on you know seeing some space alien junk that you didn't I don't think you have that kind of guilt on your conscience
And the space colds are and a space I don't yeah, I don't think this colds are you would look really good?
Yeah, okay, I think you can pass that a space colds
You're a firefighter You have those special guards and
Dental dam. You want to go right up to the bedroom. Yeah, it's happened. It's happening. You're gonna you're gonna have
Space Quaid us
And it's going to be a mate and you're all the whole time you're doing it
You're just gonna be like you know you're doing this for the sake of the world and the world
Well, you know what kind of parades will be thrown for you?
The can you know of heroes?
Well, people will look a lot different as you're sitting there.
Everyone's cheering you on.
You're just in there.
You're gonna be like, look at that guy.
He's like a green dick.
He's like a fucking martian dick.
What's up with his face?
I had to do all the bells and whistles.
Oh, bells and whistles.
Give me 10 years, everybody, man.
Yeah.
I just thought you just laid there,
just kind of like, you know, went through the motion.
Just took it.
No, it's like, yeah, it's all night, man.
He wanted to space bottom.
Yeah.
This, I'm gonna say you're still gonna do it.
Still gonna do it.
You care too much about the people you love.
Yeah.
To be that hung up.
All right. And like you said, you like that be that hung up. All right.
And like you said, that cold sore isn't gonna kill you.
Yeah.
Well, we don't know.
For 10 years.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're right about that.
You're right about that.
All right.
I think that if it were a regular human female,
he would pump the brakes at a cold sore.
Really?
For 10 years?
He's very germphobic about that kind of
stuff. Yeah. Now he just think he doesn't really know if it's just part of their species
that have this, all the aliens have this. Well, you got to accept the facts as they are.
It's a big old song. And I don't think even a, I don't think he cares about people
enough. Like in general. Even his loved ones but like like
He's gonna be the most self-man on the planet and he's gonna be targeted as as
Kind of
I don't think it was a
What if he offends this creature this man, and it was like oh, yeah, you know what fuck you now everyone's 10 years
This man, and it was like oh, yeah, you know what fuck you now everyone's 10 years
Deadder Well that's not a better 148
You're moved 10 years of our lives 10 years dead. Oh, help me put the words in the right order
And I think that he would even draw the line at like some dude in his backyard
Like some magic dude.
Little one of fucking alien with a cold sword.
I feel like-
All for two though.
I know I am.
My intuition has been off today, but I still think he's going to be like, no, no way.
Hard pass.
I mean, every time he talks to someone like his mom, his dad, and you know, he would be like,
I could have gave them 10 years. Yeah, but like 10 years, like let's say his mom is dad and you know as he would be like I could have gave them 10 years.
Yeah, but like 10 years like let's say let's say his mom is 90 and now she's gonna go to be a
healthy. He's healthy. He's got a lot of health here. He's gone man. He is going down and he's
going to for us. He's going to for him. He's going to for him. He's going to be around his ears.
He is going to for us. Like I said, now he's in the same pantheon as Luke Skywalker.
Flash Gordon. Fuck fraud.
I got the current Louis Pasteur.
No, granted.
No, it's not as macho as those guys.
A certain segment of the world is going to fucking mock me everywhere I go.
It's gonna happen.
It's sitting in this room.
You could walk into any bar in any town in America, in the world, and you're gonna get
a drink from what you did.
Okay, they wouldn't drink out of the same glass as him though.
Yeah, they throw the cup away at the pool.
Yeah, definitely.
What do you think, Adam?
I think he's going for that space love. I think I'm taking a space love. Yeah, thank you, isn't it all right
Well, Brian's on the board
I said no fucking well. It's like cold sore, right? Yeah
Everything I was like fuck these people not taking this shit up my ass
Years like oh
It just couldn't happen, man.
It wasn't, the cold snow was thrown in there
to really confuse the issue, but I couldn't do it, Walt.
I, I, I, I, I,
What if, you know, maybe the caveat,
maybe he also said it would also be
the greatest orgasm you ever had?
Well, yeah, no, I probably
still wouldn't feel comfortable, like,
I'm sorry.
Now you're talking relative orgasms.
I just felt like, look, 10 years is, wouldn't feel comfortable like far right now you're talking relative organisms
like 10 years yeah
bump it up to 100 years
it's a starting point for future
really I thought about it and I was like but I've seen what most people are doing with their time
so it's like I'm not gonna fucking do this so that they can fucking waste their fucking lives
even more for you about like an hour
Of something that you're really not into
Is not worthy of 10 years that's right. You were was a night. It was make love for a night
Yeah, but either way no
That one surprises me. Yeah, I thought for sure that you
would see the wait of the what you know this moment. Oh, I saw it.
Heroes have to make that decision, you know, immediately.
He made it. Luke Skywalker fucking fires up the lightsaber.
Flash Gordon pulls out the raid gun. Yeah. I suck that at least. Well, look at
the sister. So we got to that in there. All right. So two to two
one. It's your you're still eating. Yeah, two one one. I know, I
thought he had to as well. No, I need one. Okay, I'm still on the
lead here. Yeah. Okay, here we go. I'm speeding along in my
Wrangler and the brakes go, right?
And I only have time, I can only do one of three things.
I can make a turn to the right, left,
or keep going straight and crashing to a wall, okay?
If I turn right, there's a baby carriage containing
baby, Paul Pot, the Cambodian dictator,
and a bunch of kittens including baby Benjamin cat.
Oh no.
If I go right, I slam into a carriage containing baby Hitler, but also baby Gettom.
If I do nothing, I slam into the wall and die and everybody lives with me.
What do I do?
So you go right, it's Pol Pot and kittens including Benjamin.
Yeah.
You go left, it's Hitler, baby Hitler and baby Gidem. Yeah straight on at you. It's me. Yeah.
This is present day. Present day. Okay. I think I was a present day for all babies time travel. Yeah.
The flux capacitor in my Wrangler. Oh man. I don't think he's gonna, I think,
I don't think he's killing himself. Alright, so I'm gonna, I'm gonna eliminate that one. So I got
pull pot and baby Benjamin, Hitler and baby Gidem. Now this is designed to like are you gonna look at it from the prison of the dictators or the people?
Or the people? Yeah, yeah.
Is it a more direct? Is Gittler more important than Benjamin is the question. It's a great question.
See but I think most people don't even know who Pol Pot is. So you're not gonna get that credit as if you kill baby Hittler.
At least if you kill the people.
I don't know how about the general public are just like he killed who?
How about baby Putin?
But if you kill baby Hitler again, you're again probably parade
canning of heroes all that stuff.
Right, right.
But you know, you got, you know, also got taken out my boy.
He's a jeep spotter.
Yeah.
And his life without me really worth living.
Right.
This is a tough one because I have reason to believe that he's going to swerve left and
take out Hitler and baby, get him.
But it would be difficult for him to say it to get him right here and now.
I don't think it would be.
If he go based upon the last time we played this game, he told me he would not, he said that
I was crazy for letting Cooper and Sam and Tom Brady.
So he would be very hypocritical for him now to be like, well, I'm going to save, get
him and let him.
And if he saves Benjamin Kat, he's going to be dead.
Right.
Who will be dead?
I'm saying is if he if he you know swears in his Benjamin cat
No, if you're saying if he goes straight ahead, he's dead so there is no Benjamin cat at all
Yeah, yeah, so that and I got to tell you what it wasn't was that the wrestling party
The look of love in this guy's eyes you had that he kept looking at that cat that he the Benjamin cats walking around
I'm fucking loving making the rounds and shit. Yeah, he really is into this cat love in this guy's eyes. He kept looking at that cat. Benjamin cats walking around,
fucking, making the rounds and shit. Yeah, he really is into this cat. Yeah. That's
my, that's, it's like you and Cooper. Yeah. Yeah. Tom Brady's not in the scenario. No,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. Oh Man, uh, hey base solely upon
When we played the game last time and your reaction to my scenario with Cooper and Tom Brady
I'm gonna have to go what you're going to
Mo down get him and Hitler
Mo down get him and Hitler to say
Karosol right yeah, yeah, you can't tell which one's who, right? Little just no little mustache.
Yeah, there's no way to save them.
If Hitler dies, get him dies.
Yeah.
Go, I'm gonna go and baby Hitler.
Save the kitten.
Yeah, I think you're gonna,
if I'm to believe how fervent you are
and how like you were so sure of what you said two weeks ago
that you wouldn't have, she was a human being
over your cat.
I'm going with the Hitler. Okay. Unfortunately, no. But the world will fucking benefit big time.
You know, yes, we we may lose an office coach, but you know, just six million people are going to live.
True. So I take this thing out of it. And like I said, you're going, no one's going to really know who you ran over in Polpa.
The world doesn't recognize Polpa on the same level as Hitler.
That's for sure.
So I think you're going to get a lot of accolades, a lot of fucking paths in the back, a lot of fucking,
again, beer brought for you at any bar you walk into across America.
Still got my cat.
Still got your cat.
Lots of man of shabits, all that's right right there also like a pull parano who the
fuck that is but he saved a kitten yeah I have to agree with you Walter just
based on the how empathetic he was about like there's no
fuck no human no human he wanted to get him in here too like he wanted to be
No person would be like I don't want him in the room
Momy down like're front lawn wow
Three say I take out get him and Hitler and Hitler
You are all
Correct And it wasn't based on the cat it was based on the amount of people that Hitler killed versus the amount of
Pulp putt only killed about two million people
killer killed versus the amount of pulp put only killed about two million people killer killed over six so if I take him out even if it means losing my
look it was between the kid and you get him I'd probably I'd probably have to
save you I guess but but that's why I threw the the amount of deaths here and
there's no way I was good. The PR you're gonna get from this you know it's gonna
be amazing.
Right.
It's gonna put you up into another stratosphere online.
Followers, like, spellets.
Probably work.
But by killing Baby Hitler, do.
By killing Baby Hitler, that means Hitler never existed
and so they don't know the history.
Oh yeah, there's that, you know, the butterfly effect.
But I think public, public relation wise,
you're better off killing a baby than you want to kill.
Yeah, it could be just, he killed two babies.
No.
No.
Monster.
No parade for you.
All right.
So the score, you're up by one, three, two, and two.
Yep.
Can I show you a quick, you keep a reference in Ken,
you know, of heroes?
What is that?
I'm not familiar with the term downtown New York City
It's where they throw the parades in between the skyscrapers. Okay. Oh, I like when the Yankees winter something. Oh, good. All right
Okay
All right, I go to Stacy Patel's apartment to pick her up to go to a movie
She needs a minute so I sit on a couch to wait and I noticed a Polaroid face down on the floor
I lift it and it's a picture of her naked that her current boat took do I
Snap a pic and put it back down
It's not big with my phone put it back face down pretend I never saw it or avert my eyes instantly and put it back
As if I never saw it
my eyes instantly and put it back as if I never saw it.
That's a tough one because you're saying I've hurt my eyes instantly.
Yeah, you're getting no joy out of that photo.
Where's the other one?
You're taking a little silver in here.
Yeah.
Hahaha.
This one's real tough though.
It's a moral quadrant.
This one's real tough because there's really nothing
like I could base this on. Well, it's a very nice face. It's a moral quantity. This one's real tough because there's really nothing like I could base this on.
Well, it's a man.
It's based on, yeah, like, what type of person he is
and what type of person he's allowing people to know he is.
He is.
Because the answer can very well be like,
oh, I'd snap that picture in a second,
but you wouldn't even admit to it.
I would say that that is completely absent
from all these answers.
Oh, no, I don't think so.
I don't think that was not a consideration of these answers.
Just so you know, so you don't have to weigh that in as to what I think
people are really.
I don't make myself look at them.
So don't worry about that.
Yeah, you left.
You really don't want that alien one.
Let's hope so.
Yeah.
But that's brave of you, though.
You know, at least you're going, you know, I put yourself out there.
Yeah, you scrutinized on Quinnie's choice.
What do you think, Brian?
Because I really, I really want to go off what you say.
And I will, I will give you one thing
and say current age me, not 19 year old me,
where we all fucking know I was taking a picture of that.
Right.
Yeah, so it's a little more open the air, right?
Yeah, I think, I think he has more respect for people now
than say, well, you said like 20 years ago, 25
years ago. It's rough. You're right. It's very, it's a very tough one because especially
since he's like, he's not even like, I linger on it for a little while. I check it out.
I get a burn into my brain. I put it back down again. Is that the toilet she's stored? Oh, it's faces on the carpet.
He's not like emblazing it on his brain or anything.
I think she'll never know.
She'll never know, I know.
No one will ever know.
I'm not gonna show it to anybody
So if I do take the picture and save it on my phone It's you know my you know it's for the archives. This is right. I do I do believe that
I believe that if you took it you wouldn't show anyone yeah
I think he snaps it
Yeah, I think he snaps it yeah, I say no
Okay, I think he snaps it. Yeah, I say no.
I don't tap the photo.
No, because the memory of just a little glimpse you caught, it's just going to get better
and better and better versus that picture is going to age.
You're going to look at that picture one day and you're going to spot something.
It's all going to be able to fixate on from then on.
It's you, it's out of the way.
Well, okay. Yeah.
But it's like when you finally remember a cartoon from like your youth and you watch it
again and you're like, it was so much more vivid in, you know, my mind.
And you say he took the picture?
I think he does.
I mean, it doesn't make him look too great, but going off like what I know of what I know of
I believe he would snap the picture.
This is a tough one. This heart is once so far.
Yeah, it is because
I'm also going on the maturity thing because yeah, I agree with you.
I consider the maturity thing. Yeah, I'm also going on the maturity thing because I agree with you. I considered the maturity thing and dismissed it.
And having respect for the other person of knowing kind of like what their wishes more
than likely would be.
If she wished for him not to see it, she wouldn't be leaving it around.
You got to be more careful with your polarity.
It's face down.
Switched by the way, when I ran this by her to be like, do you care if I say this? Her only concern was like,
I don't want people to think that I have shit laying around.
I'm sure you did it.
So you're dead on them now, little friend.
I'm gonna say you're not gonna take the picture.
Not take the two for no, one for you.
Yep.
All right, Brian, it's looking less and less good for you,
my family.
Damn, right.
I almost lean towards that other side too.
I feel like I would always, even when I was young man,
I wouldn't have taken the picture, yeah.
I feel, I've always had a better man than me.
Yeah man, I'm not saying it would have been easy
and I wouldn't have questioned it later in my life,
but I do think I, so walk four, get them three,
Ryan two.
Two, all right, I got to mount my comeback.
Yeah, all right, we'll get a little more fantastic on this one.
I've been cursed by a fortune teller.
The curse is every time I pick up a piece of paper, I got a paper cut, no matter what paper it is,
receipts this fucking card, money, always got a paper cut, every time.
Money, oh gosh, man, I'm not gonna be able to touch one anymore.
Right, but you could use credit cards.
There you go.
End points.
Right, right.
That's convenient.
Yeah, because sack of coins are everywhere.
Oh, yeah.
Have you seen my pockets?
Now, I could have rid myself of this curse by making Tim, the record store clerk, only
hear Smashmouth when he hears music.
So for the rest of his life,
he'll only be able to hear smash mouth. Um, he'll never know I did it. And he can pass
that curse on to someone else. This is no, this is so easy. You are not getting a fucking
cut. Do I do it? Touch money. You can easily just be like, no, you met one time. That's how literally I
think I'm doing. I don't think you're new. What do you have music as his life? But he can pass it on.
He can pass it on. The caveat he can pass it on. You think he doesn't meet like a jerk
customer at that store that he'd be like, okay, all right, but the curse wouldn't be the same
curse that evolves for each person. But he still loses his curse. He still loses his curse.
Yeah. But he might be putting a horrible curse on someone else.
Well, then they can always pass it on.
OK.
Yeah.
There's no way you're going to get a fucking paper cut.
You'll be just covered with paper cuts for the rest of your life.
Yeah.
Because you're, if you won't take a dick and ass,
just say the world for 10 years, there's no way you're
taking paper cuts every time you touch a piece of paper.
Yeah.
Every time someone hand you a photograph to autograph, but you'd be getting a cut. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're getting it. Okay.
Poor Tim has got to hear a smash mouth. So, does it change it if I take out that he could pass the
curse on? It would have changed it. Yeah, but it's really set it around. It's too late.
Somebody once told us. What's a big smash mouth? She was going to roll us.
told us. What's a big smash smash. He was gonna roll us. Oh, you would not like their music. Yeah. Brian, what do you think? I'm a one with you guys. I think. Wow,
all you think I just say fuck to. Yeah. I know. I'm gonna be passed on without that
copy. He's in this same fucking situation that I'm in. Yeah. I take that emptor. Yeah. Alright, you all got that.
Fuck you.
Okay, alright, how many more do we got here?
Okay, this one, the scenario I didn't come up with, it's from an Adam Sandler joke, but
I turned it into a scenario because I guess it's funny.
Okay?
Alright, I'm taking a picture of my dick to send out to a lucky lady.
Okay?
As I'm going through the pictures to select the most impressive shot, I notice that a
ghost has been captured in one of the pictures.
The problem is that the picture with the ghost is a really bad angle that makes my dick look
kind of gnarly and small.
Do I share evidence of the afterlife with people
or bury it because I don't like the way my dick looks?
So do I prove to all of humanity that the afterlife
really exists?
Change the course of history.
I think it's just could be a trick of lighting as well.
No, it's a ghost.
It's a ghost.
It's three men and a baby ghost, me.
It's a fucking ghost, right?
It's not actoplasm from the book.
It's a great reference. It from the focus of the shot. But like my dick, it is not my dick at its best.
Yeah. Whenever they're going to post the photo though. Yeah.
Except maybe a very prestigious journal. It's going to be blurred or
excluded. Come on. Yeah, tonight, you know that photo gets out and that's the end of
that. That's gone. That out and that's the end of that
That's not that's not a reality the reality is everybody sees my dick and it's like it's kind of small You might be afraid cuz
You use gnarly twice now, what would a gnarly dick? Well, it's like you know
Maybe bent to the sides of the skin's all bunched I'm like, oh, there's a gnarly thing. It's like maybe bent to the sides with skinzool bunch stops,
so it looks like maybe that has a rash,
or you're being eczema.
Yeah, it's like, it's just the lighting's bad.
How selfish is a man who can prove the afterlife?
Yeah.
He's so worried about what his cock looks like.
He's gonna keep that a sneaker from the world.
So you know what you would do?
But if he picks, if he,
if he, if he, if he himself picksates it then it's it'll be thrown into
question so you can't pixelate you can't just crack it out no the ghost is like
he's like part of it goes over it
still see the gnarly the gnarly looking at the uh...
if he
i don't believe you want that to get out if he wouldn't say put ten years
onto everyone's
life span
he's not going to fucking want to be the guy that proved the
the existence of ghost at his own expense though i mean could he be so
vain and superficial
but and superficial. Yeah. We're about the part today. Yeah. But it changes, of course.
It's not 10 years on everybody's life.
It changes humanity forever.
What?
The ghosts.
The ghosts, the proof of the afterlife.
I don't know.
Most people still wouldn't believe it.
And then all they would believe is, like, can you believe fuck cue from practical Joker's
dick?
Yeah, normally, right?
Not garlic's dick ever. Do you think more vain than him was just dick?
Yeah, yeah, like nasty.
Right.
But I think it could bring a lot of comfort to people
to know that the afterlife exists.
No, he's not showing it.
That's it, normally bring a lot of comfort to people.
What do you think, Brian?
I heard that he's not showing it.
I'm leaning towards you with agreeing with you.
Yeah, I just feel that you would also weigh in.
You would be like, you know, after the world's going to believe it,
yeah, after going to be, you know, on the fence, they don't believe they need more proof.
And all I'm going to hear about is the sight of my normally dick.
I don't really like to deal with this constantly.
So, to prove to some people,
I have to be believers anyway,
because I wouldn't believe it,
just on a sight of a picture.
Well, you'd see is that dick.
Yeah.
I'm tricking me into looking at an hourly dick.
Exactly.
I don't think he's showing it.
Yeah, I don't think he's showing it either.
Wow.
Can I show it?
Yeah.
Wow, get him big up showing it.
Yeah. OK. Because he can up showing it. Yeah. Okay.
Cause you can always play it off as a joke. You can't play it off as a joke. Like what's
the punchline? It was a leaked photo of the cloud. Alright. Well, look, there's no way I
would show that photo. No fucking way. That goes in the vault. And at the end of that.
You might at least just gonna have to fucking beat it.
Now would you tell your friends would you like tell me or Walt?
Yeah, I would tell you I wouldn't show you the photo.
Yeah, I would be like, I took a picture of a ghost like,
let's see it.
Well, you could crop it out though.
No, no, no, like a lot of ghosts is like super, yeah, he's like over it.
Yeah, so that's it.
Looks like he's eating the silver stuff.
Yeah.
You can show it to some people who do know
that it's just a bad angle.
Well, I could do that.
I could show my dick next to it.
And the picture to just be like,
just like you guys say.
Yeah, right.
Bad lighting.
Yeah.
Like I just jumped out of the pool.
So fun.
Like so if I did that,
if I started showing you my dick next to the photo
and there was a ghost in there,
like would you, and it was a ghost, like you believe there was a ghost in there. Like, would you and it was a ghost?
Like you believe there was a ghost in the photo?
Would you then think me stupid for even caring about the thing?
Yeah, I would think the the weight of what you are bringing the information you are providing
to the world.
Yeah.
Super seeds.
Someone's, you know, gnarly genitalia.
I think that even, like, you know, most people would be like, you know, would see the ghost.
Right.
And yeah.
Yeah, but I think you're, I think you hit on something before what we were you're right.
It's like the people who believe are gonna believe the people who don't believe are not gonna believe.
And but they'll all agree.
That's gnarly. One thing that's universal.
That is what changed. That is what really made him.
He's got TV money.
Yeah.
Wow, okay.
So right now get him and Brian are four
and Walt, you got six buddy.
Six out of how many?
You only missed one I think.
Yeah, yeah.
So you gotta get, you really gotta get the next two, right?
You guys even.
Talk about my bears,
freaks, courtship of cue.
Okay, so three more.
Ghost and Mr. Quinn, would I rather always have to speak the absolute
unvarnished truth or never be able to say the truth at all?
So I could open my mouth and what comes out is always complete brutal honesty or just fucking lot
I can never tell the truth. It's all wise
You would want to tell the truth you would just be a lot more to yourself. You wouldn't talk as much
You don't you do you have to say it? No, I guess not say like that. You know, he's fine. You don't have to say it now
You could he might have to walk around a ball gag
Right control yourself, you know, so he just make sure he doesn't say anything that he shouldn't say
But you have to speak can't tell the truth right. I just think you would pick your words really really wisely
You'd be very calculated in what you say, but you would want to know
No, unvarnished true absolute unvarnished true there is no choosing
but he can he can open with a copy of the song you would choose your times to
speak very carefully I say but if people were to ask him
shit I'm like hey what do you think of my haircut he has to you have to tell me
right yeah I have to tell you but so he speaks if I speak I'm like what wrong
why aren't you talking to me? There's your answer. Right, yeah. Because I know like I got you.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. See, because he has to tell the truth, he has to throw,
he can throw that caveat in front of it all the time.
Yeah, but I don't know if that helps.
I think people have more respect for you if you're being honest versus they know you're
lying to them.
They may never know I'm lying.
If you're always telling lies, someone's gonna know.
Yeah, eventually you're gonna get caught.
Yeah.
People are like, this guy's real piece of shit.
That's a pathological.
That's something wrong with him.
I said, oh, remember the last time I saw you and you would have to say no.
And it would be like, but it was two days ago.
No.
It would just, you know, I think they'd be more insulted.
Right.
You know, even if they don't know your line, you're going to be in some way. He might be a
day. I'm going to be like a jogger. Of course, I don't remember that shit. Get over here.
You know what I mean? Like, are you making it like you're joking? Like an affable asshole
type thing. Yeah, but it's just going to eventually, because it's always going to be a lie.
Okay. Yeah. I'm like, you're going to tell the truth and just, you know, make sure
when you speak, he's like EF Hutton.
And you only win at matters.
Well, the fuck is listening?
All right.
You couldn't warn people of danger then.
You couldn't say watch out for that icy sidewalk.
And you had your sailing.
You know, let's say, let's say Stacey's house is on fire. Yeah.
Department, you'd be like, you know, like, everything's good. You good You could stay right but I could run in and get her. Yes, you can
Yeah, you're actually I couldn't call my one one. Yes, right. Yeah, I didn't take a picture of that right
Her partner was like 93
Double Lane I could be like 92 double lanes on fire. So I could still get them there. Yeah, but I you know
It's constantly yeah constantly having to think like that though two double lanes on fire. So I could still get them there. Yeah. But I, you know, this is really,
yeah, constantly having to think like that though,
and precious time is ticking away,
as you're trying to figure out a way to lie
and still get results.
That's true.
That's true.
You're gonna tell the truth,
and you're just gonna be a lot more less talkative.
Okay.
Tell the truth.
Yeah, I agree, tell the truth.
Yeah, I wrote that I would rather be known
as an asshole than a scumbag.
I'd rather be like, you guys are fucking pricking like my hair cuties.
Rather than be like that guy's a line piece of shit.
I think some people come to appreciate your honesty.
You know, instead of being like flowering it up, I'm gonna break up.
You've been known for it maybe?
Yeah, yeah.
All right.
I don't think a lot of people who tell the onvornous truth are, um, are liked.
Salim and Kyle.
Right. See how popular he's successful,
but he's a bad guy. He's the heel.
Yeah, that's true.
All right, it's two more.
This one involves better than you can.
I don't think they can catch me now.
Why?
It's like it's over.
I am your best friend.
They can't catch me.
I'm up by.
That's true.
I'm up by, well, way they could tie me.
All right, seven. There's two more they could tie you okay. Yeah
Unless well gets them both wrong. Yeah, unless I fucking collapse here like if you get the next one right then it's over
Yeah, what was one I got wrong again. Oh, is there any any other?
There's one involving Superman is one involving Benjamin
Go with Superman. Okay.
I have a chance to live in another reality where Superman is real.
And I'm his best friend and set a Jimmy Olsen.
But the only difference between that reality and this reality
is that T.E.S.D.
doesn't exist because Brian and Walt were never born in that world.
Do I jump realities to another world where I'm Superman's best friend?
You're still around in this world.
It doesn't destroy you guys.
It's a layup.
It's a layup.
It's a layup.
Yeah.
Go for it.
There's no way you'd want to be Superman's fucking best pal because it's like,
what kind of fucking hangar on is Jimmy Olson?
He's not respected in any way, shape or form.
He's just like,
Oh, I'm part of the fucking.
I got a minute.
I'm not sure. none of this weight into it
you're right or wrong I'm gonna say that
no I thought it was
you know you don't want it's gonna be
awesome to be superman's best
always getting like we kidnap by bringing
back and like smooth
but what kind of life is that to be
constantly like a head on a swivel
like holy shit which super's enemy can fuck with me today
You know and then you don't think it's like turning into the animals where it's like holy shit
Nobody's ever gonna get to do this one. He's a fictional character, too
You can't be safer than a Superman side. You're a fucking alpha dog, bro
You don't be hanging on the back of Superman's fucking neck like by as he fucking flies you around a trooper
Let's go soup Okay, let's Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.
Okay, let's let's give it. I definitely do. No way. Let's give it
the cowl choice. Yeah.
I was laying Jimmy Olson. Who's getting saved?
What is that mean? Sometimes he's gonna be put in that
situation sooner or later. He's gonna have to choose. Now,
when it sales really lag, like we got to kill Lois or Jimmy.
Yeah.
You're gonna kill Jimmy. So you think I would choose to stick around here and do a fucking podcast the pal around with Superman and another dimension
Absolutely you who would make that choice? Oh you it's Quiddies choice
There's no way you'd want to be
I'm your best friend like always asking for fucking to be's bowed your reassured that you're still his best No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, That's better. You think I wouldn't have a reality show and there's nothing to mention But is he is he bringing you the insurance to have you on set?
You know while everyone is ready. I mean just constantly trying to kidnap you to get back in Superman
Fuck your suit man's power like what's he talking about?
But is he bringing you up to the watch tower?
Is everything on his best
Did he bring did he bring Jimmy also up to the watch tower sure? Oh, he did? Yeah, okay?
It's a full ride man
Yeah, he gets all the perks, but only at the cost of fucking being like a fucking dog
Yeah, he's like a mealy mouth little. Yeah, he's just a hanger on
I don't think I ever realized that sick of sick of it
See my tattoo
This is how you see my tattoo
Another version of your ass. Okay, take it off. I was gonna stay in this dimension. It's fucking changing now
You know, I don't like bizarro
Don't spend time with Lois spend time with me
Which one do you well go ahead? Wait, I agree with you
Yeah, yeah
You think I would stay because I wouldn't want to be. I think it's day because of because of your friendships with Brian and me and everything.
You like you like get me boring and others.
You know, no, you spot in your life.
But yeah, you got the big red ass sort of big plus all his friends, Batman's the flat.
I'm all you think that batman respects Jimmy also
I think he does you know he can he does
He's a pussy Jimmy also because fucking Robin put on the tights and fought crime while Jimmy just sits on the sidelines like a fucking
Say I was gonna say it. I was gonna say you almost say he say it
I'm gonna say you almost can't be saying it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm gonna say it. It's true though! God help you if you chose fucking the Superman option.
But who, oh wow.
Alright, I said I'd really, really want to be his best friend,
but if I abandoned my boys, I'd not be worthy of Superman's friendship.
Oh, that's really an answer.
Yeah, I didn't jump a Oh, that's really an answer. Yeah, that is a different one.
That's a real answer.
I didn't tear down Jimmy Olsen.
So I know a need.
You actually, yeah, you went a much nicer route
to get that answer more noble.
Somewhere in another dimension,
some of you guys just sitting there nodding,
cape flowing, he's like,
I was kind of hoping I said that in portal open
Superman flew through with like you and now worried
So long second you never thought of super Jimmy also in that angle and that light
No, not really. I mean, I know he's like kind of a like little like he's like a bit of a pudd
kind of a little like he's like a bit of a pud but I didn't know.
Yeah, I always felt that about Jimmy only like it's
so worth.
He's brave.
He goes into like danger to take his phone.
Not like a Robin.
One of the many Robin he wouldn't get fucking jacked up by
the Joker with a crowbar.
He's too busy fucking, you know,
probably high Superman's cape.
But where that's the just place to be?
I know, but like, you know, at least the Robbins got out there,
fucking got their hands dirty.
You should have shot 11 year old boys be out there.
Get it?
Get it?
Wow.
All right.
Well, it's, it's, you know.
That's the last one.
Let's go.
Even we, let's see if I can get nine out of 10.
Okay.
Shocking score.
That's pretty good.
Yeah, it's not bad.
It's better than pretty.
I'm the goat of Quinnies Choice. No, my question's not good. Should I make them? They were awesome. Yeah, they were good
I think we just know you too well. Maybe I'll have to I'll have to work on like a more
Okay, the last one I feel we know that you don't want to fucking he get fucked by any dude
So no more questions about it. Yeah, just let that to no go. We know that was an easy even if they're a quote unquote
Just look not to no go. We know that was an easy even if they're a quote unquote aliens
Okay, so the final one was gonna be I can give up a year of my life and
Benjamin cat takes that year and he gets 10 years
So one year off my life 10 years of Benjamin or I
Could take five years from someone that I hate and extend my own life 20 years.
So do I lose a year and keep benching around for 10 more years?
Will take five years from someone I don't like and live 20 more years. Are benching years healthy years?
Oh, yeah, okay.
My years will be healthy years, 20 healthy years.
So I'm either giving away my life or taking away life from
other people. And these can't be used in conjunction with each other. No only other. 20 years is a long
time. Super long. Yeah, it's incredibly healthy is too. It's so stany is. Yeah, one year though off
your life though you don't know when that you don't know when your ticket's up though. It's so stany. Yeah. One year though, off your life though,
you don't know when that,
you don't know when your ticket's up though.
It could be the next day.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I feel like I know he would be,
who he would be taking that life from.
Just a guy,
you know,
a consistent guy that,
wait a minute.
There's only one trust.
He's getting the dump.
Oh, the only brave, is that the guy, the graveyard guy?
Yeah, I'm watching him age.
I'm watching him.
Oh, you know who it is.
I don't know who it is.
As your best friend, you have to reveal to me who it is.
Oh, I can't do it on that.
I don't know, no, no.
Yeah.
You won't, you'll be like, really?
I don't get it.
Oh, I know who it is.
No.
No, no one matters.
It's so.
No.
Oh, based upon what was the game, Flanny's choice? Flanny's choice. Yeah.
Based on that, I mean, I think you're going to go cat. I think you're going to go cat. I just got
that feeling. I don't know why, but if I put myself in that same situation with Cooper, I just don't
know what I'm going to die though. So like, but like but I said it could be tomorrow and then I'm not there anyway. Not Cooper.
That lives me. Yeah, but that's four years. Yeah. That's not right.
Yeah, about 10 years. Yeah. No, I think I think knowing your cats would
survive and continue to be loved for another 10 years. I think I know, but 20
years of fucking good living.
Yeah, healthy living.
I'm still gonna...
Plus you see your enemy, smited.
Uh, I'm gonna go with...
I'm gonna go with the cat, though.
I'm gonna go with the cat.
I think you think he's gonna be here, you know.
Thank, you know, we all hold, you know, a long, long time.
So, wow, the one year, though.
No, I'm gonna go this 20 years. I'm gonna change my answer
I'm gonna go 20 years 20 years. I'm gonna go 20 years. Wow. I got done to lose
You're winning anyway, right? Regardless so I'm gonna go one year for 10 years of
20 years. I'm going five for 20 five for 20
My answer is I take the five years from someone I hate. It's less about
extending my life and more about ending years. I then clone Benjamin. Wow. So what
was the final score? It was one nine out of ten. Yeah. I think you got eight
Brian. You think you're bad. You did eight
He did seven. Yeah. Yeah. Are you respectable?
I'm thanks best friend. Thanks buddy. Yeah, good scores all around man. Like I wouldn't I wouldn't have said what anybody
You know what you know where I fucked up?
It's was the Polaroid
Because I thought of what I would do. Yeah, I applied it to you
I knew you really had that one five years.
I knew you know nothing's more important than that motherfucker's misery.
Yeah, excellent though.
Excellent.
Thank you.
Senarios, you know, top notch.
Lots of hell, a lot of fun doing it.
Yeah.
So what's next?
I think get him.
Get him.
Jeeman's. Jeeman's choice. Jeeman's him. She wins. GMans. GMans choice.
She spots choice.
Yeah.
Javidan you to come up with 10 like entangling scenarios.
You need some help?
Probably. I'm not sure. I'm not. I'm doubting their
engagementness. Okay. Well, you can run it by me. I won't
weigh in on them, but I'll tell you like, you know, if they're
worthy of bringing to the table though. Okay. Okay.
All right. Okay. Alright.
Yeah.
Excellent.
I love it.
And then find the grand finale.
Johnson's choice.
Johnny's choice.
Yes.
Yes.
It's a fun game to play.
I like it.
We should play it every week.
It's not, I'm telling you, there's a lot of fun coming up with these.
Yeah.
And I came up with ones that I didn't use because then it became about balancing sci-fi and fantastical and real like you know there was uh there's something
to it. You'll see you'll see you'll see your personality and all of them though. Oh
thanks man. Yeah great. It's for good for ill. Yeah, nobody else at the table could come up
with those. Well I'm sure I won't be able to come out. Yeah I couldn't come up with yours
it won't be able to come that's the beauty It won't be able to come. That's the beauty of the game.
Yeah, I think that's probably the end of the superhero stuff.
Tell him, Steve Dave.