Tell Em Steve-Dave - #516: The Vanilla Edge
Episode Date: May 8, 2022The boys spring leaks, Bry and Q lose a favored vacation spot, a rare purchase is made....
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I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't need poofies I don't I'm Dave D'Ever!
I'll say a pubic here for 500.
Tell him Steve Dave.
Hello and welcome to this week's edition of Tell them Steve Dave.
I'm here with Walt.
Hello.
And from a far away land, BQ.
Hello.
Hi.
Out there in Staten Island.
Yes.
Now, when you hear Walt, that a man of BQ Stature has the same problems as every other normal
man.
Does it make you feel a little better?
Yeah.
It does, right?
Yeah, it actually does.
I'm just like, you know, that like he, he, his, he has leaks like everybody else.
His roof leaks.
Yeah.
Holy shit, man. I feel like, yeah holy shit man I feel like man
like I feel like I could tackle anything now I'll tell you what
Mary Beth was taking a shower yesterday it was the water's raining down onto
like you know to the floor beneath and I'm like why this is me I'm a fucking loser
oh you're a leech it's a shit oh. Well, guys, I just just to be clear, like my roof isn't leaking. I don't live in a ghetto. I
What was leaking? Well, I need to cut off our own story. I'm sorry. I don't know which way you want to go first.
Oh, no, that was the story. Oh, just your top leaks.
That was the story. Oh, okay.
Is it just your top leaks?
Well, they renovated the bathroom
like a month or so ago,
and the leak has just got progressively worse.
Did they seal the top?
I don't know.
I would have to think, no,
like if you saw the job that they did,
you know, you like,
like I say this, like whenever I want to provide a bar
of how bad the work is,
it's like I could do it better
So what do you guys do just put towels down and make and try to like well, what is she splash around in air?
Why don't you go to raise your head arms above your head come on
Now it's like it's just, I think what it's like in the actual knob,
like where you turn the water on, I think it's behind the wall and in there somewhere. So
like the water just comes pouring down, which means they're going to have to go and remove
the thing that they just put in. Like one of those, you've probably seen the commercials
for them. It's like, oh, those tubs that go slide right in,
the one pieces.
Yeah, and they slide right in.
Yeah, I'm sure it works like that every time
that's smooth, right?
Oh, I'm sure it's always a problem.
Because what you're doing,
this is the version of the quick fix.
Right.
You're not gonna spend the money to do it right.
You're gonna try to do it with this thing,
this like the easy, cheaper route to fix it.
And usually it does not work out.
And they play the show how simple it is
and how happy everybody is once it's done.
They put a floor down.
Now, when I originally called,
I was like, through the water,
the floor is so soft, it like you're gonna fall through it
So what they did instead of like taking all that up putting down new plywood and then putting it down that like
Floor which actually doesn't look too bad. It's like that pergose shit almost about like this gray wood
But the wood underneath is so soft that now when you step on it the boards are breaking
So there's a bunch of boards that splits throughout them.
I mean, I know why people do that.
An adult male, the United States.
Sounds like you live in the Ukraine.
You've grown.
I know why people go, they don't want to spend the money
to fix it properly the first time, but inevitably, don't you wind up spending more money like in the long run by not addressing
it and fixing it properly?
Exactly.
That's this, like, you know, I have a landlord, so I understand where he's like, it's a rental
property.
Less money I put into it, the more money I'll make back.
Right.
I used to say
landlord, I'm leaning towards slum lord. But yeah, you're right. It's like they, and they
even told them, well, first they tried to blame us. They were like, what are taking
shows with the shower curtain on the outside of the tub?
I don't know.
That's your fault.
Yeah. Oh, yeah. It was our fault.
Just like when the kitchen sink was leaking, it was also our fault because we piled up
too much stuff underneath the sink.
Yeah.
You know, it was like detergent, that kind of thing.
That affects fights.
Yeah, yeah.
The same thing is that everybody piles up underneath their sinks across America.
We did and somehow we were causing the problem.
And we don't, I mean, the in the past like three and a half years, I guess, I've lived there,
the calls have been so minimal in terms of like, hey, can you fix this, hey, can you fix that?
They should have been probably triple. Uh-huh. It's like, I don't like dealing with people,
like coming into the house and it's annoying. So I'll just let some shit go.
Because at this point I'm just like, fuck it, the whole fucking ceiling can come down.
It's not my problem. Yeah, you'll leave in soon, right? Yeah. We get out of there.
Fucking crooked house. Won't miss anything about it. Not one thing.
But what was your leak? Oh, well, so I, you know so the house is old, so the basement.
For some reason, I had a French drain put in the basement.
And then they also dug up the outside of the house and tarted.
It sounds like it should be waterproofed, right?
But it's not with a certain amount.
I mean, I guess it's just like, if the groundwater goes too high, it just goes over the foundation of the house,
kind of like gets through. And it hasn't happened since I fixed the house,
but the last rain that we had, I started getting these leaks, because it was
just torrential. And I figured out what's going on, Walt, is my gutters,
have, if they get blocked, they have these over- over poor things that like when it boils
you know when it lifts over it spits it out you know how like on churches they
have gargoyles and the fucking water spouts out of them so I have like not
gargoyles they just boxes but it spouts out and the problem is like there's a
there's a there's a blockage somewhere in the drainage system so all the
spouts on the house are pissing water into the exact spots that will lead.
So I have to, I have a call into the gutter guy. I can't do it myself. I try that a month ago,
over a month, I'm waiting for the gutter guy to come. I call another person. He's like, no,
we're two months out. It's like fucking insane. So I can't get anybody here. So I have garbage pales under the spouts
to catch the water from the spouts.
But then I had to go to,
then I have my pool pump
in the garbage can pumping out the water constantly.
So the spout spits it into the garbage can,
the garbage, the pool pump spits it out,
but I have four of them.
So I had to go to Home Depot and get four pumps.
So now I'm outside in the fucking pouring rain, setting up these pumps and electric cords and everything like that.
And so it's just, yeah, it's just, but I mean, I look like, like, I have four extension
cords running around the outside of my house, four fucking pumps pumping, four garbage cans
just sitting like a box of the house. It just looks like shit. And I'm so, you're the
modern, you're the modern day version of the Dutch boy with his
finger in the game. Yeah. I like how you're so woke you're gonna say,
I'm out there and I'm like, this is why am I dealing with this?
Why am I dealing with this like?
Well, you know what though this this is great for your for your
Your PR you know like I said you're the way you're viewed by everybody because not only had the leaks
You also don't have any gargoyles. Yeah, no I would have assumed that people would have assumed that you had gargoyles too
Well, I'll tell you something else while I was, well, you'll like this. This will help my, this will help my,
so my neighbor to the back of me,
their house is for sale, right?
And there's no one living there.
And they have a pool that, I mean,
they can't sell this house.
It's been like two years, they can't sell this house.
And but no one's been there for over a year.
So their pool has one of those blue pool pumps in it.
And it got clogged, so the whole cover of the pool
is like forming a lake. So in the rain today, today I went out there I got into that fucking lake I pulled out the
pump their pump I opened it up I got all the leaves in the gunk out I cleaned it all out
fucking pouring rain put it back put it back plugged it into my outlet because I don't know that
there I like ran the extension cord down to their house so now I'm pumping out their pool cover
like Rand extension court down to their house. So now I'm pumping out their pool cover.
Nobody even lives there,
just to help out the next owners of the house.
Wow, that is fucking unreal.
That's a nice guy.
That's like, you know, rush should remake
that song modern day Tom Sawyer,
but modern day Dutch boy.
Yeah.
Fucking leeks all over Statenham.
Yeah, leeks of days.
And this probably gonna be some fucking asshole.
Wow.
Yeah, but that's that and no one will even know.
Well, now they will.
Yeah, oh, you knew I was venting it while I was doing it.
I was like, how do I get this out there?
Is this worth the price?
I don't know.
Yeah, well, will the AP cover this?
Probably not, but at least I'll say it on TSD. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, so that's been my morning.
So I'm, you know, so it was a little frustrating.
So thank you for your patience.
Oh, no problem.
Yeah, and here we are.
Doing it remotely now, but that's all right.
I could still see you guys.
What are you gonna do?
Sometimes you gotta do it remotely.
You gotta do it remotely sometimes.
Better than nothing.
Yeah.
Q, uh,
this won't really affect you, Walt.
I don't think you'll be able to relate to this,
but you have been to Key West.
Florida.
You've been to Florida.
Yes.
And then the Key West.
Q, you and I have been down there several times.
Yes, love Key West.
Many, many. It's like you're home away from home. It's probably, it's definitely top three
of my favorite places on the planet. I love it down there. Yeah, me too. And I've vacation
there more with Q than I have any other place with any girlfriend. Just two dudes shuffling
off the Key West for a lovely weekend. However, I read some very disturbing news yesterday that some of the town's people and
some of the business owners are tired of fantasy fests of battery and they're looking
to shut down what makes fantasy fests great.
Is fantasy fast is this on the level of like hedonism?
No, I would say it's more on the level of like Marty Grah. Okay, you know, there's some flash in there's some risque
But there is some nudity. Oh, yeah, definitely sugar coated. No, there's definitely like try to like play it down
All right, you guys are so quick
There's some there's some flashing
Catch it here in there.
Well, when I went last time with Mary Beth, there was no flashing. It was, I mean, thankfully, because everybody was like 80,
but that was before the weekend where all the kids come down.
But in case you're even wondering what we're talking about,
Fantasy Fest is a 10-day celebration down in Key West, Florida for Halloween.
That which we don't even go to anymore.
We don't go to Fantasy Fest or we don't even go to anymore.
We don't go to Fannie Svester.
I haven't gotten in years.
Is that amateur hour cue?
No, if Fannie Fess is a blast and I recommend anybody go, just for me, you know, in a crowd
full of drunks for four days straight, I can't pull it off anymore.
But I encourage anybody to go. It's blessed. Unless what
it sounds like they're about to change the rules. It says rule
changes are imminent. But from what I understood, none of that
shit was legal anyway. But the cops just sort of overlooked it,
you know, it was they closed down to Volstreet. It was limited
to a certain area. But now people are complaining like, you
know, people are having sex in the alleyways and they're walking around naked and blah,
blah, blah.
Why do people do that?
Sex in the alleyways?
Yeah, like, I can't imagine it's comfortable.
So like, why can't I imagine it's a, it's, it's got, it's somewhat degrading, I would think.
Are they big ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding,
ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding,
so you do understand. Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding you know, walking by in the distance as you're under the cover of the foliage, you know, banging away.
Voyage.
Voyage, yeah.
It would you consider trash cans and garbage bags and dumpsters?
It's a tropical area.
Right, but like I imagine.
I don't see much greenery in an alleyway.
Now, I think they're talking about like,
there are people's homes, you know?
Like, yeah, not necessarily like alleyways
in between businesses and shit,
but it's like, you know, they go off into the side streets
and they can't control themselves.
Now, I think this is the common thing that happens,
though, like, you are kind of like on the side of like,
hey, let it, let it, let it happen.
Maybe let it fly.
Like it history has, it has, has said that this is great for the area.
This is why people like to come in.
This is why you like to go there.
But what if it was in your backyard?
If it was in my backyard.
Yeah.
Literally.
In your backyard, you had like every morning or you would hear something and you look back
there and there's a couple going at it fiercely. Ferociously. Yeah, I probably wouldn't be crazy about
fiercely and ferociously. Yeah, I probably would be crazy. I can, but I don't care enough.
I don't care. It's too good of a time.
But did they know what they're getting into though,
when they purchase property in this area?
They know that this happens every year.
Some people probably do.
And it only affects, I would say,
probably, people within a couple block radius
of DuVal Street, right?
Yeah, yeah.
I would say it's probably not.
Nobody's wandering a quarter mile from DuVal Street to Bang, yeah, I would say it's probably not like nobody's
wandering like a quarter mile from DuVal Street to bang an AR or anything like that.
No, no. So it's the immediate residents in what they call Old Town and I have to
think I mean it's been going on since 1979 and somebody was quoted in one of
the No Saksha's person. It was quoted as saying somebody I think the mayor or somebody was quoted as saying like
it's um you know it's it was wasn't started as a family friendly event but it wasn't also supposed
to be a triple X event either. Right. Now I haven't personally I have not seen any triple X
I have not seen any triple X.
Well, we did see back in the 90s. There was one woman leading a naked girl around on a leash
who would allow you to touch her in any way you wanted for a dollar.
I mean, that sounds pretty triplory.
You know, yeah, I guess so. That is a pretty triplory.
I wonder what she's doing today, that girl on the leash. She was younger than us then, and I was, yeah, I guess so that is a pretty triple X wonder what she's doing today that girl Melisa she was younger than us then and I was what 24 and she was younger than us
She was like 23 22. I think she said she was so she's around that my age now. She's out there doing it
Maybe she's out there on the leash still. I hope so she likes it
Wouldn't you like to think that that she's still out there on the leash having a good time?
I would choose to believe that, yeah.
But she probably like instead broke up with that girl and then married some dude who's like,
you look at a leash.
That was it.
Or if he even knows of her past leash,
oh, even worse.
Yeah.
Oh, his wife was on a leash on devolves.
Yeah.
Let anybody touch her for a dollar.
Oh, God almighty.
No, no.
Which was in the late 90s, early 2000s,
was probably still only worth like $1.30.
It's not like inflation kicked it up that much.
Yeah, maybe she invested that money.
I don't know.
She liked it though, she was happy.
Yeah.
Yeah, she made a couple bucks.
So I could see what they're saying though.
Like it's not
It there is a line like if it was just painted boobies
We might not be having this conversation, but it is people take it to everybody's her own worst enemy, right? So it's like
somebody's
Just banging in a yard or leaving condoms and someone's pool or some shit like that and And I in the sand, I would get me pissed as well, no?
Yeah.
Yeah, I guess I would.
Yeah.
So what are the new rules?
Uh, I don't know.
They said that they haven't been named, but they're imminent.
And it seems like body painting was going the way
that you're sure.
No.
Which to me is like, that's, that shuts down
a lot of independent body painters within the the like a lot of people are gonna
lose out on some oh
Painter bodies like what why wearing a bikini?
I guess so but that's not the point
Yeah, but you still see 90% of your body is exposed and you can have all the beautiful paintings on it that you on your back on your belly
on your arms on your legs
Why is it got to be right now one certain area?
Or else it doesn't matter then it's not
That's the best area
But it has to be there that it's or it's just not worth you know anything. Well, it's not the same
Yeah, I'm saying but it doesn't make any sense because I think I got a paint your your whole your whole bikini too
Hey, you're ruined a bikini?
I know, the bikinis are expensive.
Well, I mean, maybe if they were like,
maybe if it was just like you have to wear a bikini bottom
by law, but why can't you go topless?
Women can go topless in New York City,
it's legal for women to go topless that they want.
Isn't that weird they pass that law
and then you never see any women topless in New York? Well I mean have you walked the streets of fucking New York City?
Yeah. I don't want to. No you wouldn't want to these days.
Yeah so next time I guess I went to one of the last fantasy fest that because we
went two years ago. Very bad tonight. Yeah. One of the one of the last fantasy fest because we went to years ago.
Mary Beth and I.
Yeah.
One of the last.
Oh man.
That's all right.
Key West has become like Vegas for me
where it's like, it's not the same experience I had
when I was a younger man and I was going.
Like now I go for different reasons,
but Key West has all those reasons I find.
Like it's a great place to go with your friends and sit at a bar and just have some drinks and
go out in the water and shit like that.
So even though it's lost that dirty, dirty vibe, you know what I mean?
That edge.
That edge.
I find it don't need the edge anymore, Walt.
I'm okay going down there for the other bountiful treasures of the Florida Keys.
He says that a lot. He makes these proclamations. Do you find that to be true?
It doesn't. I think he still needs that edge. Oh, I think so too.
He's definitely. If I need it, I know he needs.
I know he's trying to convince that he doesn't need it.
He's really trying to build himself up. He's like, you know, I helped my neighbor today.
And now I need the edge.
I don't need boobies.
I think I think you get a couple drinks in them. Then it comes right back.
Yeah, he's not going down. He's not in his car like his car again. Like his fucking Mr.
Mr. Rogers uh...
uh...
he's even with a couple drinks and he's a
Mr. Rogers turns into the incredible fucking Hulk
yeah
yeah
uh...
but doesn't everybody doesn't everybody need a little bit of an edge as you
know
no need an edge
you're not throwing condoms in anyone
I never need an edge you know for the moment I don't know who I would you don't need an edge. No, you're not throwing condoms in anyone's holes. I never need an edge, you know, for the more,
I don't know who I didn't need an edge, man.
I stayed as far away from the edge as possible.
Where's the edge?
You'll find me on the other fucking far, far, far away
on the other side.
You go too far.
Brian and Brian, you see the far to the edge.
What happens?
You find another edge.
If you go too far from one edge,
you find the other edge, buddy.
True, but I've always been able to find
Comfort and never seeing the edge I'm even seeing the edge. It's so far away. I can't even see it
That way you never fall
You never have to worry about you know like you know like
Falling off the edge with the metaphor or falling out of bed or anything. It's nice and safe. Okay. I hear you. I'm only saying, but I think
I'm the unicorn. Like Brian said, everybody needs the edge, but there are a few Sunday
Jeff doesn't need an edge. I don't think in his private life Sunday Jeff has
some sort of edge. No, no, no, no, no, no, I would bet anything on it. I mean, I would bet
anything on it. There's no edge. You know, they like watches like the red shoe diaries or something like that.
I think his edge is going even more vanilla. Oh, really?
Yeah, I'm going to push it.
Yeah, like, that's how he gets edgy.
He's like, I'm going to make it even more the Vene and vanilla.
The vanilla edge.
Yeah, really.
I mean, you think about like you and Sunday, and this guy's like, I don't need the edge. It's really, I mean, you think about you and Sunday,
and this guy's like, I don't need the edge.
I like that vanilla edge.
It's a good name for a band, the vanilla edge.
Just play like, just play covers of like very non-controversial songs and stuff like that.
Something that couldn't possibly be the name.
Some dad rock.
Yeah, some dad rock, but not like the naughty dad rock.
Like, you know, is there naughty dad rock?
Well, if you listen to like the rolling stones and stuff
like that, like I think they're, you know,
they get sexy.
I think you got to stick to it.
Yeah, I would not consider the stones dad rock.
Oh, really?
No, I was thinking like, you know, something like very like,
oh my god, who's that bad?
Oh, I can't remember, like, 38 special.
Oh, okay.
Hold on, Lucie.
Yeah, I can see that.
That's pretty special.
Yeah, you know, lover boy.
Uh-huh.
Starship.
Everybody's working.
Starship.
Yeah, these are the bands that, you know, they wouldn't have the scandalous lyrics that
the stones had.
Right, right.
All right, vanilla edge.
I love it.
Are you speed wagon?
Oh, yeah.
Take it all the wrong Oh, yeah.
Like born to be wild as this crazy as they get.
And they play it ironically.
Yeah. I play through it like that.
We're just kidding.
I love it.
Yeah. So it's the death of, um,
or at least the last gasping breaths of a place that factored in heavily into our,
I want to say youth because I was probably 31 when we went.
I consider that youth now.
But, um, but yeah, a place that God, we like, if you're gonna say like,
okay, name your top 10 memories,
like easily a couple of our trips fall in there.
Yeah, it's a special place.
I do love it down there, but you know,
this could all be PR stuff.
We'll see who follows those rules.
Yeah.
And it's like everything else,
like I just find like, you know, just like everything was just just better than the 90s man. This is the way it was. It's like another thing
Do you glorify it though?
Maybe you know, do you like as you get further further away from those days?
Do you as people tend to do do you glorify? Yeah, maybe they were they were good
But they weren't like where you're putting them, where at least this untouched
stat.
No, I think that everything's so annoying and bad now that it's undeniable that almost
any other time was better than this.
I might be putting on the roasted glasses, but we got fucking, we're living in this shit
time right now, so
It does seem like there's an unprecedented amount of finger wagging. Oh, I mean, it's every single fucking thing you do
It's finger wagging. It's it, but it's like it's just like
It's just yeah, the finger wagging has been going on for so long now that you're just like oh fuck this But like it's it's just it's just like everything now. It's not even like the finger wagging has led to annoyance on another side that
just wants to annoy the other side and that one's a, so it's like everybody's having a bullshit
for years now and you're just like, those of us in the middle are like, I just don't care about this.
And the noise has gotten too loud. I think for most people, I don't think I'm for me. Yeah, I think, I think, I think
it's accurate. Yeah.
It's so deafening now that it's hard. You just can't bear to listen to it anymore.
No, you can't bear to listen to it. And it's just like, I, I mean, you know,
the, of course, chicken little, right? The sky is falling.
Or the boy that cried wolf, right?
It's like everything is a fucking panic. Everything's an existential crisis.
No matter what happens, it's the end of the world today.
And you're just like, ah, man,
there's only so many times I could hear that America's dead and gone
before I'm like, oh, maybe you guys just don't know
what you're talking about.
I don't know.
I don't know I don't know
So weird things been happening lately Walt. I've been
Finding hope. I don't know man like I'm starting to think like more and more that like
My for some reason it's unearned, but my faith in America and Americans is rising Oh, I thought you were gonna say religion. I was just like, dude, that's fucking dope.
Not yet.
Not yet.
Not that dope.
I really thought he was gonna say, yeah,
I really thought he was gonna say,
I've been finding hope.
No, no.
And I was just like,
I was like, this is gonna be fucking balls out episode
where Q finds God.
Not yet, no.
Not yet, okay.
No, no. Look out there. We'll get there
We're working towards it is the older I get the closer that's I get
If you're done oh no time
Be cute
God, it's be cute, but for God, it's be more. Oh, yes, be more.
It's common.
It's common.
Oh, yeah, everybody faces it.
She was talking about God.
The wasn't she talking about her period?
Yeah, I just was using the title of the book for anyone.
For anybody who recommended, I'm sure there's not many.
No, they're comfy.
Because there's no way, although I don't know anything, it's reintroduced into the literary mainstream.
I think the, I mean, you remember how titillating, I don't know if you know it with about this book,
but...
Hey, got it to me, Margaret?
Yeah.
I've heard of it.
What was the titillating aspect of that book?
There was only one like sentence about it, but I don't remember.
The teenage girl character talks about her getting her period.
And that was all we had back in the 70s, man.
We took that book out of the library just to read that sentence,
you know, because it was so hot.
We were just like,
how? Because we didn't, like we were, we didn't know from girls. 12 and 13 or 11. So to see a book
in the public school library about talking about those things was so erotic. I mean, we didn't
have cable TV. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, so it was just like, you know,
you maybe you found a playboy in the woods.
All right.
But this you could like, if you didn't have anything,
you know, you just went down and checked out.
Hey, God, it's me, Margaret.
What do you mean it's out?
Johnson has to brought that book back at you.
That motherfucker's had it for three weeks.
What was going on in the woods?
Because we all found playboys in the woods.
We all found them.
Isn't it fucked up?
I think that had to be a 70 slash 80s phenomenon.
Yeah, yeah.
I think aliens were leaving playboys and pen houses
in the fucking in the woods
Crazy behind Wagner high school on Staten Island. You my cousin were walking and we just came upon like a stack of like a magazine called shaved
the fear shaved magazine and it was like and
It was exposed to the elements, but they were still in good shape like you're like what is it?
What are yeah, they just were they just were freshly dropped off.
Yeah.
But did you even think about it at the time?
Like, weren't these come from?
No, it was just like, oh, you shut.
They're from evil.
They're from evil.
Say, beaver.
Yeah, beaver.
Shave to beaver.
Yeah.
Like, I can't tell you the amount of times
frolicking through the woods, you upon a a pen house or a wee yeah or or something and you would just be like where did this come from?
Why is it here? Yeah, that's right. It's a god it is though
Coming across with with Mark London coming across us. It was a small trunk. It wasn't a full-sized trunk
But it was just sitting out there. Yeah, you told everybody about that. Yeah, and it opened it up,
and it was full of fucking books. Oh, full of magazines. That was the treasure chest.
That was your literal treasure chest. Yeah, don't go looking for gold or money, because
you already found yours. Yeah. Happy you had that. This is is my currency How many treasure chest is one man expect to find in this world?
Like they should be on every street corner
In a way it is because of the internet now your
Yeah, the treasure's everywhere
Yeah, but now the treasure means nothing because it is so accessible. Yeah, you're right about that
And you're and you're you could wander from the woods
from all the way to Staten Island,
all the way to Jersey and Mom with County,
you're not gonna find skin magazines in the woods anymore
because I mean, it's so rare to find a skin magazine anywhere.
Yeah.
Yeah, because you're the internet.
So that's why you're like, that's the dinosaur,
that's like finding a fucking dinosaur bone.
It's better than finding a dinosaur bone because it's at least real. Yeah
Wow
Yeah, but no my faith in Americans Walt. I'm starting to have faith. I think America's gonna come out of this
Okay, what what can you point to that makes you know absolutely nothing
But I'm just thinking about how amazing Americans are and like how
As a society and as a people were unequaled in the world in the history of the human race
There's nothing like America and I think that people are gonna start realizing that again.
I think.
Yeah. I do. I do.
I think we're gonna turn a corner.
I think we're gonna start seeing each other as Americans again.
Oh man. Like Americans seeing each other as only Americans.
Not as only.
I think that fucking is out of the bag,
but I think that'll be the dominant.
I think that'll become the dominant.
Like I do think that'll eventually become the unifying
thing for everybody.
Where am I?
I mean, I hope so, but I don't see it happening.
I just think that it's going to get worse.
Things are just so bad.
I mean, it's, it's crazy.
Both sides are just fucking lunatics.
They're all lunatics, but the middle's getting sick of it, I think.
I don't know, dude
I'm telling you. I have faith. I have faith in Americans. I do. I don't know why, but lately it's been growing inside of me where I'm like
Yeah, this Americans will turn this around like we turned everything around
It's so hard though to think we'll ever get there because one side tells you
You know the sky is
orange or purple,
and the other side tells you,
and Apple is a banana, and each side believes
whatever there, whatever is being told to them,
like they fucking don't question anything.
It's just like, I don't know how you fucking get
to a place where it was when we were little.
I don't think anybody was at their each other's strokes the way it is now.
No, but I think it's coming.
I think there's going to be a leader rises something.
There'll be something.
I feel.
Yeah, I hope so.
I think it could be you, man, with this fucking...
No.
I'm fucking, you know, fixing pools your neighbors pool and it starts somewhere
Well, I mean I've always have any skeletons right? I like you can run for office
You know no, I mean no skeletons that like people don't know about
I mean, well, you know what the skeletons you have don't matter anymore. You know, maybe a little
Maybe a little nookie
in an alleyway in Key West.
That's not gonna stop me
as somebody from being present anymore.
No, not anymore.
It's gonna be a hell of a, yeah,
you're gonna have those kind of skeletons.
You could get there.
Yeah, that I don't wanna do.
It's likeable.
I'm so likeable.
No, I wanna follow.
I wanna follow this great leader.
You wanna follow, okay.
Yeah, I'm a follower.
Not a leader, I don't think
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It's the Sunday, yeah.
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There's one or two guys.
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Let's say, let's see, personal endorsement.
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All right, cute.
What are you reading, Kim?
So it's this book on and it's such a complex idea that I'm not going to be able to, like,
there's going to be a lot there who are going to be like, the heat doesn't always talking about it.
They're absolutely right, because I've also only read like three chapters of this book,
but it's already like blowing my mind in a way that I can't wait to talk about Walt,
to Walt about this, because it's about time, the books about the concept of time.
I'm intrigued already.
I knew you would be dude and it's like I
Was read like so far what I've read in the book. I've had to put it down and just be like I can't fucking wrap my head around
What's going on and the concepts of it are crazy, but like
like you've heard that
You know time the point of all the point of the book just give me a second to work through this because it's really complex
The point of the book is like there's really no such work through this because it's really complex. The point of the book is like, there's really no such thing as time.
It's like all, like time doesn't violate a single natural law of physics.
There's nothing to prove that time exists except for heat.
Heat is the only thing that can't go in reverse.
Everything else can go in reverse is what this book is saying.
And then they take, they, he goes to show on how time is meaningless in this way, where
it's like, you know that, I don't know if you guys know this.
I've heard this in my life, but you don't have like speed effects time.
You've heard of that.
Like the faster you go, the slower time passes.
You've got to feel.
Okay.
Superman.
Right.
Okay. But like that's a problem with space travel,
where if like a spaceship takes off and goes to speed of light,
by the time when they get where they're going,
like a month will have passed on the starship,
but like six years would have passed on Earth.
Like there's also it's a time gets janky with speed,
but this book's also saying that time also gets janky with height,
where if someone's standing on a mountain and
someone's standing on the, in like the plains or a wheat field, the person at the top of
the mountain ages faster than the person at the, in the, in the fields, right? And these
are generally accepted things that we've heard our entire lives. But this guy is like, well,
if that's true, then what's going on? guy is like, well, if that's true,
then what's going on?
So that means that every point between the mountain,
the top of the mountain and the plane,
because it's a gradual, it's not like a light switch
just goes off and suddenly you're aging faster
up here and down here, it's a gradual thing.
So at each point from the top of the mountain
to the planes is a different speed of time. So
when they're saying like, so what's is it measurable? Oh, it's measurable. So tiny. It's not even measurable. Well,
no, you can measure it. But it is really tiny, but it is it's measurable. So they're like, so he's like, all right, so like, so what
is his point is like, so what does time mean then? He's like, if it's different from here,
if the top of the table that you're at is experiencing a different time flow than the
bottom of, than the feet of the table, what the fuck is time? And then you add speed into
it and he's like, okay, so now not all of you have something that is your head
is technically aging faster than your feet, but also if you're going fast, then there's
no such thing as time.
Like if time could be warped in every direction, there's no such thing as time.
It's hard to explain, but you're just like, what the...
No, you're doing a pretty good job.
I can understand it.
Yeah, they're like...
I get it.
Everybody looks at time is just as flowing
river, but it's actually like every single part of our existence is ruled by different
rivers of time. Rivers of time. And then if you add in speed, so it's like, so how are we,
how do we simplify it to like time-sister's river is river something starts it goes on at ends
But the reality of is is like the reality of is it it's so complex that we don't even fucking understand what's happening
And we simplify it to this one fucking thing
But his thing is just like there's no way it's what we think it is and they're just now starting to get into this and you're like
Well, what the fuck is going on if time doesn't exist?
It definitely doesn't exist as we know and understand it.
So then what does it actually exist as?
And you're just like, I don't know what the fuck's going on.
It's very, very complex issue.
Wait, maybe the most complex issue brought to the table
until Steve Dave.
Yeah, I'm glad I'm...
I would think that it's possible that a one day,
something like one somebody or one government will be able to weaponize time.
Yeah, sure. That's unfortunate. Well, I mean, it depends as long as it's America.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. I mean, so you're saying like if like, let's say somebody
live their life closer to the ground, like even, like, even, like,
I just live my life moving around my day to day things I was doing,
but I just crawled on my belly.
Yeah.
It's slightly probably would be young, slightly younger,
not even measurable maybe, right?
But my body would be a little bit just
A nanosecond maybe younger than the person who walked upright correct and it's hardly worth it
It's not worth it, but it's like it's bad. Yeah, but it's a it's a baby step right and so he's saying that like
time is
Time is all right, so like what's
He all right, so he's saying like the sun in the earth right like affect each other right but what's between the sun and the earth.
Nothing but space and time. So his point is like it's they're not affected like what we think of as gravity and again this is where I'm sure I'm getting this wrong somehow. What we think of his gravity is really time and
And like that's that's that's fucking just my head just explode
It's crazy. He says so when you drop something when you drop a ball
It's not going it's not headed down towards what we think of his gravity. It's headed towards slower time
Hmm, you're subscribing to this.
I mean, the guys are fucking goddamn astrophysicists.
I don't know.
Like I said, I'm only...
What about are we ready to fucking throw Newton under the bus?
Well, I don't think that his point is that Newton isn't wrong.
It's all a scientific journey through discovery.
So what is it possible,
like if we dug down deep enough into underneath the crust
and were to live under the crust and not be,
would that be good enough to change our the way we age?
I don't think so.
I doubt it.
I mean, not in any real way,
but I mean, it's just like,
but he's just like, think about it. He's like, how does the earth, like there's nothing in space?
So how is the earth just sitting there? It's all these fucking concepts where you're like,
man, all this shit seems so obvious, but the same reason. He's like this after after spending time
and now volcano that you guys bought each other. Not at all, I read it on the beach and the Bahamas and I'm like, this is like, I can't get my head around it.
I just can't get my head around it. I'm like, I'm just...
Yeah, it's tough. Who's the guy that wrote it?
Do you know his name? He should be protective because I's he could be opening up a can of worms at
Something he made one of people may want to silence him
Maybe who was that who's the disillumined rusty?
No, I'm looking now, but but his point is like this is all laid out in Einstein's this is what Einstein's
Theory of relativity is he's like his he's saying it's impossible to
The concept of time goes out the window.
All right, this is a great way to put it. He's like, we see via light, right? Like light hits
something, reflects off and comes through our eyes and that's how we see, that's how we evolved.
But even though it takes a split nanosecond for light to hit your skin and then come to my eyes to see what you're doing,
you're already technically, even though it's measurable by nanoseconds, I'm looking at your past.
Because you already did what I'm seeing the light showing me you did.
So it's like, we're already living in different time frames.
Even though it's suggested by nanoseconds, it's like, he's like living in different timeframes, even though it's suggested by nanoseconds,
it's like, he's like, that's where we're at.
Now, you put that on a planetary scale.
He goes, and there's a fucking planet all the way on some other fucking four years away,
where it takes light four years to hit you.
He's like, the concept of the time goes out the window.
Who's present is the present?
My present, when I'm seeing the light hit my eyes,
are you a present when the lights hit and your skin and going to my eyes? There's no fucking things. There's no such thing as the present. My present, when I'm seeing the light hit my eyes, or your present when the light hit and your skin and going to my eyes.
There's no fucking things. There's no such thing as the present.
It's like, it's like, I can't fucking take it.
My mind's unraveling.
I can't even, he was having an episode right now.
I can't take it.
We're going to stop that for a minute.
But you see what I mean?
Wait, somebody call 911.
It's not a sign of an...
You can't figure out time.
Mr. Quinn, you're gonna come with us for a little bit.
What do you mean?
We're gonna, we have a nice comfortable room to see.
Please.
When do you live?
Where are you from?
When are you from?
There are, there's no clocks on the wall in the room.
We're gonna take you to Mr. Clark's. No matter, that's my point. So you agree you from? There are, there's no clocks on the wall in the room. We're gonna take you to Mr. Crocs.
No matter.
That's my point.
So you agree with me.
Yeah, he's like, he's like before clocks existed.
He's like, what the fuck did everybody do?
They were just like, oh, the sun's up.
It's the highest point.
It's midday.
But midday in fucking Europe is different from midday
in fucking California.
So which one's the real midday?
That's how crazy time is.
It's out of control.
Anyway, this guy's name is Carlo Rovelli
and the book's called The Order of Time.
And it's crazy to read it.
How many chapters in?
Only three.
So, you know, it's how many chapters in total?
It's not a thick book.
It's kind of like a, it's a short book, but I don't know, maybe 12 or 13 chapters, but it's not a page sharner.
You have to sit with some of these ideas, and I'm not as smart enough to really grasp them, as well as I should, which is why I'm babbling.
So the book's called the Order of Time.
And the guy's name is Carlo Ravelli, R-O-V-E-L-L-I.
Why am I meant to, wait a minute, did I just have, like, that felt like deja vu, did he, didn't he say that already?
Or am I just really am I getting fucked up?
Did you say that twice or no?
I think I, I think I said it.
Okay, okay.
You're fucking me up now.
Now you got me like, oh, we're weirded out.
Yeah.
He said the name of the book twice and the author right? Yeah, okay, all right
I just want to make sure because I was having a really fucking weird episode
It yeah, it's fucking crazy. I mean the point of the like the thesis one of the thesis statement to the book is like
Why do you remember the past and not the future
and it's so obvious to say because the future hasn't happened yet but
it looks like these rules are breaking down
I don't know, man. Are they?
Yeah, I don't know.
But I look skeptical.
I'm trying to figure it out.
I just imagine it must drive him crazy on New Year's Eve
when it's like, it's New Year's in Tokyo.
It's New Year's in Australia.
Yeah, I didn't think time zones were that fucking like.
No, no, well time zones are just,
no, time zones are separate from what he's saying.
Time zones are like, if the planet,
if the planet is gonna measure time by the sun,
yeah, it make, you know, that's why everybody's time
is different because the planet is chasing the sun. Yeah. It make, you know, that's why everybody's time is different
because the sun, the planet is chasing the sun at different times. Oh, you were saying
he was just using that as like the middle a he wasn't that's not part of his action.
We get him on T.S. D. Q. You got enough fucking pole to get him on. I think he's a tie
in or Spanish. Oh, he doesn't speak, he must speak English. Probably we could try. It's the language of science for God's sake.
All right, I'm gonna I'll give it a shot. I'll see if I can get him to explain this.
Did you have anybody that like you reach out to him not you like on your behalf and be like
please. I've reached out time that doesn't matter or doesn't exist. I've reached out to authors of
books I've read and they've gotten back to me. So I'll try with him
How awesome would it be to get like have him explain it to us?
Three fucking dopes. Oh, he's Italian great
I said his Italian was are you fucking with us? No, no, I said he's Italian a Spanish or something
I didn't know which one. Oh, he's Italian. He's one of my brethren
or something. I didn't know which one. He's Italian. He's one of my brethren. Wow. Do you recommend him finishing this book? It looks like it's really fucking
what I'm going to know. Yeah, it could cause problems in life. It could cause brain damage.
It's like he's getting sturdily. His brain is bleeding. I can't even hear it.
I'm saying I'm four years away from her. And you're two years in the other direction.
I like to hit my eyes.
And then it's off the skin.
And we're like, what time is it?
There is no time now.
I will snap.
It could be the 90s all over again Walt that's what I'm getting at
Go back to Key West. This is a long this is this is you somehow try to find some way
You go back into the 90s. I just want to live in 99 forever.
It was the best.
It was the best Y2K changed everything.
This guy probably is going to blow up now because of this episode though.
Yeah.
I'm just going to name again, Ronaldo.
No.
Carlo Revelli.
And I'm seeing that the I mean people Galileo
There's another Italian these Italians are very foggy. They're scientists smart. Yeah, they're very smart. I love the Italians
Though the audiobook is read by you Dr. Strange, so this is already out there compliment cumbersmatch cumberbatch
That's the triple x version But a dick cumbersmatch cumber batch That's the triple x version
Dick cumbersmatch
Did you see dr. Strange? I did see dr. Strange did you say it?
I didn't see it but just give me your your thumbs up thumbs down
A thumbs up thumbs up thumbs up good to hear everybody I talked to that scene it has given thumbs up thumbs up good to hear yeah everybody I talked to that scene it has given thumbs up yeah it's it's it's not as without ruining anything well it's
Sam Raimi so it's like there's a lot of Sam Raimi touches in it that I that I
fucking adored because it's been a while but it's not it's not as weird as it
should be it could have been way weirder for a multiverse movie but it's
solid it's solid it's fun to watch watch. So yeah, you like it.
You like it.
I can't wait to see it.
Yeah, I'm hoping to see it next weekend.
And a kind of retro, because I didn't really like
Juan the Vision that much, I disagreed with a lot
of that happened on the show, but it turns out
that my views on the show were accurate.
It's pretty cool.
Like it actually made me retroactively re-judge
Juan the Vision. Oh, that's impressive. Yeah, that's going deep. It's pretty cool, like it actually made me retroactively re-judge WandaVision.
Oh, well that's impressive.
Yeah, that's going deep and altering perceptions of past content.
Yeah, because my whole problem with WandaVision is like,
I'm like, why is everybody blowing this woman?
She's a bad guy, she's a villain.
Right.
And this movie, she has-
She tortured people.
I could not understand why so many people are like,
yeah, I won the vision. She's so cool.
And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about?
And I remember being like,
we'll sort the sword agent. That's the bad guy of won the vision.
I remember being like,
but he's the good guy.
I don't know why everybody's fucking...
Because he's fucking white male, dude.
He's the bad guy. Like, he's right.
I go, he's fucking right.
And I caught shit for that. And this this movie kind of is like,
yeah maybe Q is right a little bit.
You are on the right side of history, Q.
For once.
Hahaha.
Hahaha.
Not since 99, have I got on the right side of this?
Hahaha.
Hahaha.
Yeah, it's pretty good.
Yeah, I like that.
I like that.
Yeah. Lot of I liked it. I liked it. Yeah.
A lot of cool cameos.
Some cool cameos, not as many cool cameos as you want.
That's what I'm saying.
They could have made it a lot weirder and bigger.
But the cameos that they have are pretty cool.
Yeah, I was like, there was some rumors that Lufa Rigno
as the Hulk was gonna pop up and I was like,
there is nothing more than I wanna see
in the Marvel Universe and Lufa Rigno bouncing around
as the Hulk, but it didn't happen, I heard.
No, that's what I'm saying.
They didn't embrace, they didn't embrace
like the multiverse, multiverse aspect of it.
I thought we were gonna see Deadpool,
I thought we were gonna see like,
I thought we were gonna see all this shit. Um, and it it's fairly linear story. But
still good, but I still enjoyed it.
What's up next? Got an ad. Got an ad and then a special guest cue that
all right. Have it alerted you about. Oh, it's exciting.
But first let's talk about Ray Khan.
Oh, it's exciting. First, let's talk about Raycon.
Mom's are one of the few people in our lives
who still leave voicemails on her phones or call to just say hi.
I don't find that to be the case.
Now, cue.
No.
She texts me a lot with lots of emojis and shit.
My mom has a habit of calling,
and I'm always happy for my mom to see,
but my mom has a habit of calling at like nine always happy for my mom to see but my mom has a habit
calling at like nine o'clock at night.
Oh yeah.
And I'm always like, it's not a clock at night, ma'am.
But you can't say that because it's your mother.
You know?
Yeah, it's true.
Or you could just like not pick up.
Yeah.
Say fucker.
I would never do that.
You got to pick up.
But let's say you've been breaking it to that volcano a little bit and then like you know,
then you're trying to talk to your mom. I don't, you know.
That's tough sometimes, yeah.
Yeah.
Because then it seems really long.
Like the conversation seems much longer.
That's because time has no meaning.
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, you're right
As proven by volcano like what said I just don't want to see a report on the news that
Inprite the little Joker found wandering nude screaming about there is no time on the street
volcano under his arm
Wonder his arm. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I'm just big question with you like it's very big up. Yeah. Just like a lady. Just like a mother.
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Really?
Yeah, but maybe for the sake of Edgar, I could get her some of these radcons. And I think
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11 years in, it's still her go-to, there's nothing else.
The fire hasn't been extinguished, the passion hasn't died, now.
Like, you know what though?
I mean, she bettered me because when we start the podcast, she was as hardcore into Groban
as I was to the devils.
Right.
She beat me.
She bested me.
Because I grew out of love with the devils, you know,
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And like, in any way, shape or form like I used to,
you're all as better to me.
I never thought I'd say that.
We, I never thought I'd hear it.
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
And what a weird situation for the,
for the realization.
Or how should we, she's more passionate than I am. Yeah. And what a weird situation for the realization.
She's more passionate than I am.
Yeah, she is more more obsessive.
You're telling me there's no other artist that gets in that fucking playlist.
Like when on the shuffle, there's no other artist.
Not that I'm aware of.
Wow, that's mental though.
Also, I also think that you should have felt that.
Yeah, that's mental.
That's out there, man.
You haven't found one other artist to listen to in 11 years. Wow. That was awesome. I also think that you should have feel bad. It has a mental illness. That's how it's about.
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Okay, cute.
Yeah.
No, we got a special guest here.
Yeah.
I don't know if you probably can't see him though, right?
Not really. I can't move over a little bit. It's like, I'm alright enough.
I can see him enough. Hey bud. You recognize him? No. Put the pressure on him. I know.
That's why I was not trying to do it. but our guest blew the joke immediately.
Our guest fucked up. So what's your name? Jimmy.
We got Jimmy. What's up, you?
And he made one of the most unusual purchases one might make at the TSD town general store.
No, what do you buy?
What would you say are the top things
Walt that will like that's never going to go?
Oh God, what he bought, what he bought, and what he bought.
Right.
That's it.
Wow.
I mean, the only weird thing I can think of is the Lego and the hair.
Well, you would be one of those is the correct answer.
He's not a Lego fan. He didn't buy the hair. Well, you would be one of those is the correct answer. He's not a
Lego fan. He didn't buy the hair. Why? What you bought? Go ahead. Explain it to the
man who's who's hair you now own. Well, it's not the first lock of hair I've bought
actually. Wait, wait, wasn't get him charging like $2,000 for that?
He didn't charge that to him.
You got a better deal in that, right?
No.
I thought about Haggillin, you know, pulling a wall.
No, you did not pay spend.
Yeah, I did.
I did.
Oh, dude, no, we can't come on.
Get him or any got him.
No, we can't do that.
How are we gonna let this man pay that money for the air?
He worked. What do you do for a living?
It's America.
Yeah.
In a way, we can't do that.
That was price.
So nobody would buy it.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
What do you do for a living, Jimmy?
I work for the postal service.
Oh my god.
Oh, all right, so I'm fine.
Yeah, look, can you get me a Suzan.
You can get some pointers off mic about how to deal
with the postal?
Yeah, sure.
Because we got a lot of Suzans.
Yeah, you do.
Oh man.
Still dealing with Suzans?
Yeah. Oh man. How dealing with Susans? Yeah.
Oh man.
How do we get happy with this queue, huh?
Well, I just feel, yeah, I mean, I just, yeah, no,
because like, I don't feel comfortable
taking this man's money, but wait a second.
Well, no, no, no, get him got the money.
It's not our money.
No, I know.
It's for getting for his house fund,
but like, how was getting him able to part with it? I figured he he priced that
high so he wouldn't have to part with it. Did he? You called his bluff? Yeah, he called
his bluff. He was a horrible misplay. If you want to call it a horrible misplay, get
getting $2,000. He's like, I'm feeling bad about my purchase over here. I'm honestly
shocked. Nobody bought it sooner.
Every time I come in, I'd see it.
And I'd say one of these days, I'm gonna go on.
Are you a collector like you of the odd and a curious?
Little bit.
I have.
Kew, you know in St. Clown Posse, I'm a jock.
Of course.
I have a block of Shaggy Tutop's hair actually.
So your hair is going with this.
So this is a hair collector, Kew.
Did I make it feel a little bit
But it's only the second lock I've bought it'll probably be the last lock a hair. I bought a celebrity hair
I look I have a cousin of mine that has a lock of Elvis's hair
I know this president precedence for this sort of thing, but I
I
It's hard for me to value my own hair at
2 grand It's hard for me to value my own hair at to grant
Now I don't know if you've noticed, but Q is clean shaven now and he has saved the whisker hair if you're interested
Sweet discount
It's in a sandwich bag as we speak
And someone is driving it down. He had his assistant
He texted her and she is now on the way with his whisker hair. I'll say a pubic hair for 500.
Okay, all right, listen, wow. Okay, so you bought that today, Jimmy?
Yeah, about an hour ago.
Wow, and have you had any feelings of remorse?
No, I'm quite thrilled with it actually.
What are your plans for the hair? Yes, I was going to say that's the same exact thing. What are your plans for the hair?
Yes, I was gonna say that's the same exact thing.
What are your plans for the display?
I might get a case for it.
The two don't. I might walk as a case.
So I'm figuring, I mean, this came in a very nice case.
It does.
Like you signed and now I heard that Gator Moleso through
when the t-shirts. He doesn't know I heard this, but I heard it.
Not all the fucker. He is definitely paying for those fucking shirts
on that money.
He did.
Wow.
He's trying to throw me a free book too.
What book?
The Knights.
No, no, no, no, no.
I told him I'd pay.
I told him I'd pay.
You can, yes, but no, you don't have to pay,
but he will certainly be paying as I talk to him
from his page.
Actually. Yeah, give me a tally what he gave you for free he will certainly be paying as I talk to him from his page.
Yeah, give me a tally what he gave you for free because that shit ain't free for him.
Why?
He's going away the fucking.
What makes you, what is it about hair?
Because I understand like, you like a tarp so you you would collect a guitar pick, or like you maybe collect T-shirts.
What is it with you,
which you fellows of a certain way
that you don't want like fire faucets hair?
You don't want Jacqueline Smith,
but you don't want both Derek.
All these dead people.
Like what?
What?
All these hot chicks,
like why do you want like a Taurus and rappers and
and this is I.
This is I.
Like why why don't you want like something like I said like some some
luscious, bodacious hair in that collection.
Or are you still a your it's hard is hard to find that the caliber of hair.
I never really sought out to collect hair.
I just kinda...
You're the hair guy, bro.
I guess I am.
I kind of fell into it.
You're the hair guy.
You should get in and fuck it.
Get that, buy that domain, get that on Twitter.
You should be the hair guy.
But Jimmy, don't you feel like people...
You're gonna allow people into your home
and you're gonna be like, yeah, this is cute
from Pracable Jogas hair. And they're gonna be... You don home and you're gonna be like, yeah, this is cute
from a practical jogger's hair.
And they're gonna be, you don't think they're gonna be like,
who?
No.
No, no, no.
I have a bunch of cute shit hanging around.
Not, you know.
I mean, I don't want a collection.
Yeah, I know, not like, you know, personal shit of yours,
but like, you know, your action figures.
And I have the chicken bone bandit tattoo that you made Matt Reigns get like you have that tattoo.
I do. Yeah. Matt Reigns saw it actually. So are you? Oh, he told me about you. Matt told
me about you. He said he said, yeah, he's, oh, you're the guy. All right. Cool. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. We were a bit of a super fan. I mean, where are you from? Originally, Worcester, Massachusetts, now I'm in Philly.
Okay.
What are you in town for?
The stashbath.
Oh, okay.
I got you.
But whenever I'm in town, I gotta come see you guys.
Wow, and what do you do for the postal office?
I'm a custodian.
But I got like 10 years in.
No, that's a great job.
My brother did that for a few years.
You gotta be fucking, we didn't give you a last name, right? No, okay. I was like, I was gonna make a joke. You got to
be taking fucking welfare checks. So like, as they come in for other people's and social security.
Yeah, right here. Just like you're just taking them as they come in. I need more hair.
How was I gonna pay for it? Jimmy, are you married or are you a girl? No. Okay. No.
Jimmy are you married or are you a girl? No, okay. No. What's how old are you?
33 When was your last girlfriend?
I get around. Okay, great. All right. Good. Good. All right. We're boyfriend. I don't want to
No, no, no, no. Why you think the
When you find out that he's the hair guy, does that change things if
you're a perspective?
No, I don't think so.
Like I said, I wouldn't think so either.
I wouldn't think so.
I'm just trying to get to know the man.
That's all.
I think people be impressed.
I would definitely think so that like, the first date, like you go out to do that, it's
like showing you a toe and you're like, hair.
Like, you don't need, like that, though, you don't have to
lead like that weird, like you got get a weird. Like what are
your hobbies? You know, and you're like, oh, I collect
celebrity hair. I so far, I was shaggy too dope and cue from
the practical joke. I can learn there. I hope you don't want
it. Maybe Brian will take some snippets. And you know, before
you leave today, a little beer, that's fine. Sure. Come on in there.
I think, I mean, maybe we should give him the haunted house as well.
I don't know.
I just feel like a house.
Yeah.
Yeah, maybe we should give him that.
Let's give him that, because it's in the way.
OK.
How about that, pal?
I mean, you don't have to do anything more than the guys are.
Yeah, definitely, man.
No. You definitely deserve more than then some
Some hair, but that's amazing. Yeah, I think so it is definitely is
Do you want to want the Houghton house or is that or you don't you know? Yeah, no
I mean, I don't have the room for much of anything because I collect so much bullshit, but I was to you collect
much of anything because i collect so much bullshit what else do you collect uh...
action figures
posters t-shirts fucking everything
masks fucking wow i'm a bit of a collector yeah
all right it will it will make me feel better if you take the lego house as well and
that i built that every single brick i built that was on me yeah um and i i'll
have to take that i have the box for it somewhere i think here so what I'll do is I'll I'll we'll get your address take take the haunted house with you today
I'll get your address
I'll sign the box and like write something on the box and we'll ship it down to you because that you I
Can't live with the fact that you paid two thousand dollars for my hair
I can't but does it help though that he's got the tattoo and he's got, it does, yeah.
St. Clamposy, that helps like, you know,
feel a little bit like, okay, like this is a legitimate collector.
This isn't something you did it on a, no,
it's gonna regret it tomorrow and like,
would it have gone in his mouth being like,
what the fuck?
I wanna be so sure.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Is this the most unusual piece in your collection?
The hair?
Uh, it may be.
It may be.
Anything on that level of like strange, like, or unusual?
Unusual, one of a kind, kind of things.
Like somebody's gallstone or something weird.
No, nothing like that.
I have like the hat that Ernie Hudson wore on Kongpook Man.
You like, wow.
Yeah, I have that
How'd you get that where we did we sell that on you must have cuz I got it I got it from a fellow ant
Wow, I thought like production would have kept that I don't remember how I think maybe they gave him away
I don't remember now, but yeah, they those got out into the wild
Wolf wow to me I get me, I get it.
I get it.
I've spent a lot of money on collectibles over the years.
It's just odd to find yourself a physical part of your body.
Be that collector, I know.
You know what I mean?
I mean, that's got to give you a little bit of a boost, a little bit of like you walk
on an air for like a half hour after this podcast over, right?
A little bit.
Come on, man. I don't think so. Enjoy it. It's cool. Moments after he'll be cleaning out his gutters again. Yeah,
I'll be outside. I don't know man. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know that I feel that way.
Clean out gutters looking for hair. It could pass off as old. Squirrel hair. It's just, this squirrel hair It looks like it could have been part of my fear
I feel better I feel better with him taking the the yeah because that's also hard to get that's a hard to get Lego set now
So that's good to so that that I feel a bit better on
I Fucking get it. I appreciate it man. Yeah. No. Thank you. Do I mean I appreciate your here on. I appreciate it, man.
Yeah, no, thank you.
I mean, I appreciate your...
Got to appear on TSD.
Do you listen to TSD?
Uh, regularly.
Okay.
This is a little bit nerve-wracking for me.
Is it?
Oh, yeah.
Doing great.
Oh, thank you.
Oh, which I'm...
You couldn't have been better.
Absolutely.
Yeah, you're really cute.
That you're me the hair guy.
I mean, this is it.
I mean, do you guys want to give him some of your hair?
Is there any? I
Don't have enough to give away you it's it's for every day. It's then and I'm not and you know what?
I mean, I've seen what he's willing to pay. I'm just not gonna give him
Like 24 25 bucks
Like a single strand for him to mix in with mine you guys don't want to do that a piece of Brian's beard
Yeah, let's say on don't want to do that. A piece of Brian's beard.
Yeah, let's say on Mike, we will do that.
Anyone knows if he really even wants it though. That's like, you know, he's you're on TV 24-7. You're a big deal. I mean, he doesn't want to, he may not want to taint
his your hair by putting our hair in there.
Those are two major stars.
Shaggy, too dope and be cute.
Right.
I think you guys are devaluing yourselves.
This is Tellum Steve Dave.
He's in your studio right now, man.
He's not a Shaggy, too dope studio.
Our hour.
Our true, true.
But yeah, I mean, I wouldn't, that's the awkward.
That's like when somebody asks like, hey, do you want me
to get in that picture?
When Mike would do that? That's nasty. You know, that's like when somebody asks, like, hey, do you want me to get in that picture? When Mike would do that, that's nasty.
You know, that's like, you need to put some money on,
oh yeah, sure, you can get in there,
but maybe they really didn't want them in there.
What do you mean maybe?
What do you mean maybe?
What do you mean maybe?
What do you mean maybe they really didn't want them in there?
What do you mean maybe they really didn't want them in there?
What do you mean maybe?
Well, okay.
Well, okay, I know my dog has been shedding.
Would it be, would you be interested in maybe a podcaster a sea Liz podcasters dogs there?
collection that extensive you might have some all over your all over your pants for your guys are your pettinger today
So you may have gotten that's a that's on the house
Man, so all right, so you paid a thousand for the Lego and a thousand for the hair.
Let's look at a that one.
Yeah, that's more digestible, right?
That's a little more digestible to me.
It got to be on TSD.
Yeah, it's been a long time since we had a listener on.
I can't remember this one.
This is true.
Yeah, you know what, dude?
You owe us a thousand dollars.
Since you're close and you have a nickname, you could become the next Frank five.
You could get your own show on Patreon.
We'll cook up by email.
We'll figure it out.
Something Jimmy the Hare guy is going to have a life after this.
He's not just going to last this one episode and be forgotten.
No.
Jimmy the hare guy is going to have this so much forgotten.
We'll talk about celebrity hair.
Lance, tons of collectible.
Hair content, you know, just maybe,
maybe a one shot.
Caratone.
Caratop.
Jimmy the hair guy, I love it.
Right?
I mean, Frank five started from humble beginnings.
Look, how huge he became.
Yeah, you're right.
Look, again, multiple shows on the Patreon. You can't get rid of Frank
five anymore. Yeah, you guys are popular. He might be the best
thousand dollars you. Oh, how much did you spend? To grant
it might be the best thousand dollars you ever spent. It might
be. I mean, Frank five became one of your best friends. So maybe
Jimmy the hair guys your next guy. He could be a kill real
quick.
Frank five drove down from where he lives to have lunch with Walt and turn around
and drive right back home.
Why?
Is that a sign of psychosis or what?
That's an eight hour drive.
Isn't that an eight hour drive?
I've been certain about that.
In the rain.
He came down yesterday, went to lunch
and hung out, watched a little Pluto TV,
and then he was on his way back home. Oh, he's deeply unhappy. Or am I just that damn fucking
impressionable and like fun to hang out with? But can he just zoom with you like this? Can
he just like, it's not the same. It's not the same. He's got to be in the room. He's got to experience the Flanagan. There else in any worth it.
It's not the same, he said.
He's like, fuck it.
Oh, I get it.
I get it.
I get it.
Wow.
Four hours and four hours.
Did he bring Mrs. Five?
Did he bring Mrs. Five?
Oh, it was just the boys' afternoon out.
Not even night.
I don't know. I suspect that's what it was really about.
What's that?
Get it get away, get away from the, from the wife for a little boy time.
I could be everybody.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
No, it sounds a little, it sounds a little weird when you say a boy time, but, uh, no,
I'm, I'm the guy that goes to Key West with this guy for boy time.
I just meant the phrase boy time.
Like it, it sounds like we could be, uh, be monitored by, uh, by the authorities as we go this guy for boy time. I just met the phrase boy time. It sounds like we could be monitored by the authorities
as we go out looking for boy time.
It's not the best phrase.
It could be the name of your new show, Jimmy.
Bullshit, Frank, I know you didn't drive
eight hours to go down and talk to some 50 year old dude.
You were looking for boys.
Yeah, it was boy time, wasn't it?
Q pop time.
No, there's no such thing.
You were a high time boy time or otherwise
He's got he's a you're targeted under a harsh light as you like no one would believe for a minute that he was
Drive all the way down to hang out with a friend very hours. You're trolling
I know you are
His wife is divorced him.
I'm with Mary Beth like 99% of the time.
If that 1% I was like yeah I'm gonna go drive 8 hours to have lunch with her.
Actually like you're lying.
You're fucking lying.
He wasn't lying.
Oh man.
That sounds nice.
Yeah it was.
It was fun.
You were going on a cruise together.
I said, Jimmy, next year we could be on a cruise together. We absolutely could be on a
cruise together. Just be you and my family. I would love that. Let's do it. I had to explain
to my wife that, yeah, how did you meet Jimmy? Well, long story. Well, you remember how the last guy threw up on a cake and dinner, tell anyone.
This guy's not as weird.
He just buys people's hair.
Did you know the insane clown posse?
I'm not familiar with that.
Is that a gang in prison? My wife would say.
Woof.
Oh, all right, well.
Well, Jimmy, a pleasure to meet you. Welcome to the, say. Yeah. Woof. Oh, all right, well.
Well, Jimmy, a pleasure to meet you.
Welcome to the, yeah.
Yeah, you could, like I said, maybe this could be
life-changing road for you that you just got on.
Thank you guys.
You could be coming up from Philadelphia to do a show.
Yeah, you have to, you have to promise me though,
but before, listen, the condition of you taking
that Lego thing is you, you have
to promise you cannot clone me. I do not want to be cloned.
Oh, don't worry. I'm not going to do that. So 50 years from now, I don't want that hair
going into some sort of fucking device that spits out like a little cue clone.
I think you're good, man. I'm not that smart.
I think that closest he's going to come is like fashioning himself like a little hair piece and then dancing around like buffalo bill
tell him steve david