The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - Beat Yourself Up (The Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics)

Episode Date: January 6, 2025

Adam and Drew open the show by examining how people can be exceptionally smart when it comes to things that interest them and extremely inept when it comes to doing things that aren't as important to them. Later they take calls on using opiates to combat back pain, the effects of e-cigarettes and erectile dysfunction with diabetes.

This is Corolla Digital. Recorded live at Corolla One Studios with Adam Corolla and board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist Dr. Drew Pinsky. You're listening to the Adam and Dr. Drew show Yeah, get it on got to get it on no choice, but to get it on mandate get it on And welcome the program. Thank you so much for listening Thank you so much for telling a friend and it's nice to watch us climb the charts over there on iTunes and all the incredible download numbers you guys are giving us and If you'd'd like to support the show, you'd like to donate

to the show, let's go ahead and click through the PayPal donation button or set a donation subscription. Two bucks a month. How about that? How about everyone just say, let's set your donation subscription to two bucks a month everyone listening do that true and I would be very very happy and it'd be a quarter a show I think that's what it would break down to it seems very reasonable to me yes true the or worth 25 cents two bits two bits and it's only twelve and a half cents each really a show So I think me and drew you have to move things around me and drew Two and a half cents or twelve and a half cents a show, but you can click through the Amazon link Yeah, if you might have been click through the Amazon link at

www. Adam and drew show dot-com Adam and dr. Drew show. Oh sorry Dr. Drew show. I just did that to wake you up. Go ahead buddy. Well I'm just saying you remind me only too often that it's not, even if it were 12 and a half cents each, which it's not, you're covering 24 cents of that work. Absolutely, god damn, absolutely.

Just to make that clear. Yeah. A reminder, just a reminder. All right, couple questions of a psychological nature Some for others some for you true. Oh, well, mm-hmm because I was talking the other day about how For a guy who does this for a living you can be in and is so Tuned in and sensitive to other people's feelings how you can be wildly out to lunch This is wildly out to lunch. I give people, in terms of the human IQ,

not sort of reading people, even though you read people very well for a living, there used to be situations like when, I always tell people the story about when we did Love Line, and when we'd have some big guests like Rod Stewart in, producer Anne would always go running for the camera, you know, let's get a picture, let's get a picture. She wanted to get a picture because Rod Stewart

doesn't come through there too often and it would look good, you know, look good up on the wall of fame. But then hazy fantaisie would come through there and Anne would be standing there by the door going, thank you then Hazy Phantasy would come through there and Anne would be standing there by the door going, thank you, good night. And Drew would go, hold on, aren't we getting a picture? And Anne, I could see the look on Anne's face like, yeah, I'll get the camera. And then she'd walk back and get the camera and take a picture, although I didn't think she had film in the camera for that one. And then I'd look at Drew and go she doesn't want a picture hazy fantasy okay so and now you're gonna say you don't know the difference but no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no And don't you want to get the camera and she'd go yes, I'll go get the camera and she'd walk back and go get the camera

Take a picture that will never see any wall ever see because you're not encumbered by these Foreign experiences called emotions. I know that doesn't encumber you in your daily I could read and and wasn't forgetting to take the picture and didn't want a picture I wasn't and this is another part about you, you don't understand attentional sort of blinking. You know, like people have attentional sort of phase-outs and even as focused as I can be, I can go into autopilot where I'm not paying attention.

Well, if you're not paying attention, why are you telling her to get the camera? Automatic, two things, automatic, just like, hey, why don't we do that? I'm sort of in pilot, you know, robot mode. But more importantly, I don't want them to feel bad, like we didn't appreciate their appearance because I already fell back because of the shitty appearance. They don't know that we take pictures with Rod Stewart.

No, I know. But I somehow remember something about, like, they're like, hey, don't you want to, like, something with that kind of feeling. No, this has happened more than once. I'm sure it did. I'm sure. But it's more of the robot mode. All right. Number one, number two in the robot mode.

Your manager, Howard Lapidus, I was thinking about this the other day. For me, I just take life, comes at me, and then later on I think about it and then I think, what the fuck. Now Howard, a perfectly nice guy who I get along with, but he was my former manager that I fired. It can be looked at as like someone you were married to and now divorced kind of thing. Yeah. Sometimes these things run the gamut of incredibly, oh, one party sued the next party and it's as ugly as it can possibly be.

And then there's other versions of it where you agree to go your separate ways. But either way falls under the heading of you used to work with this guy, then you fired him. A few weeks back when you and I were going to do a show in Bakersfield, I said, you want to ride together? And you said, we'll ride together. And I said, well, let's ride together to Bakersfield.

We'll drive out there, make the 90 minute drive to Bakersfield together. And I said, fine. I was looking forward to it. Drew, come up to the house. We'll get caught up. Drew showed up to the house with Howard to drive to Bakersfield.

Now, that's the kind of thing that if I was going to show up with your ex-wife to drive to Bakersfield. Now that's the kind of thing that if I was going to show up with your ex-wife to drive to Bakersfield, you would want to say to the person, hey, Sharon's coming. I don't know if you have feelings about that or if that's cool or if that's uncomfortable or you know, you seem to get along okay, but I should give you a heads up. Yeah. Now it's not the end of the world No, you're right. I don't remember weird emotional thing. Yeah, we're a guy who's tied in pretty good emotionally doesn't think Might it feel weird for the former client who fired this person to drive to Bakersfield with that person in the car? I figure out why that didn't happen. That doesn't seem right at all. I

Saw Howard at the door and was like, what? Womp womp. Yes. Now, Drew, for a guy who is tied in for a living. Wait, I thought for sure. That's like a pretty big gap in your psyche there. Yes, I apologize. Okay.

You know, but to an interesting point, I make gaffes like that. That's what I'm saying. I don't read anything into it. You know, the other person I made a gaff like that was Robin Quivers, where I sort of fill in for my, you know, I do the thing that people do, you sort of fill in. You tell the story to yourself and that makes sense to you. Like we gave her that personality inventory on the air and scored her on the air and told her on the air on Howard Stern show that she had the highest

score we'd ever recorded and then we in in terms of narcissistic, the highest narcissism rating I think Robin's a fantastic person, love her, doesn't mean anything, she has a lot of narcissistic stuff uh... we put that in our book, We just printed matter of fact,

here was the lowest score, here was the highest score. She was furious, outraged. She didn't ask for my permission for this and I thought... Doesn't that speak to the narcissistic? Yeah, it does. Doesn't that help your score go up? Isn't that one of the questions? If you score highest on this test and we print it in a book and you freak out, you gain four points for being incredibly narcissistic. But I didn't take a beat and think about her perspective.

That's a gaffe, as far as I'm concerned. No, I'm... Listen, I'm the same way with people all the time because I have no idea. I'm the guy who... Steve-O got drunk and assaulted me on my talk show, and then two weeks later, like, oh, we rebooked Steve-O. And and assaulted me on my talk show, and then two weeks later, like, oh, we rebooked Steve-O, and I'm like, fantastic. I don't have any like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, you know?

He's not welcome, you know? You know, you throw a kung fu kick in Letterman's direction, you're banned for life. You get choked on my show, you can come back the next week. Not because I'm a great person, just because, eh, I grew around guys who tried to choke me. It wasn't any big deal. And they called everyone every name in the book and they did everything to everybody and I never even think about it and people send me tweets all the time like so and so is talking shit about you on so and so's so and so and I just don't even look at it. Doesn't matter to me. Don't

think about it. But yeah, for someone who's supposed to be sensitive for a living, Drew. No, right. And it really bothers me. And so I apologize. Now be more bothered. All right. Now. All right. Take that off your list. Let me ask you this. Speaking of Gary Fultar, not Gary Haftar. I'm interested in people's psyche and motivation. And as I say all the time, people do a lot of what bothers me, I do not mind people not having the capacity to do things such as

my dog Molly does not have the capacity to do certain things she can go to a certain level yeah basically sit you know he'll lay down you know eat your din-din you know outside or stop barking she has a couple of couple couple things she can fall along with and that's about it. But that's her full capacity. And then as you go up the food chain, you get to smarter animals, crows and monkeys

and things like that, but they hit their limits. Do you see what I'm saying? Well, we've never really tested the limits of crows, according to you. Oh, people send me stuff every day. They can use tools. Latest one someone sent me was a crow had a piece of meat inside a little lucite box, but it was in too far for the crow to reach it.

And they gave the crow a little stick, but the stick... Little bow and arrow? No, it's a good stick. The stick was too short to reach the meat. But it could use the stick to get a longer stick in another lucite box. Wow. And it used a short stick to get the longer stick

to then go get the meat. And they didn't have to train it to do any of that? No, it figured it out. I'm telling you, I've never, look, for everything I say, Drew, crows are smart. I know, I've learned that. They're turning out to be smarter

in just about every other animal. They use, they not only use tools, they use language. The guys who train, not train crows, but have to work with them, they have to go up to their nests and get the eggs and all that kind of stuff, or go get the little chicks and everything, they have to wear masks, because the crows recognize their face of the guys doing the studies at the university,

and when they recognize somebody, they sound an alarm to the other crows in whatever language they have, which is here comes trouble, or go get the guy. When the guy can't walk out to his car, he'll get dive bombed by crows, because they recognize him as the guy who went and raided their nest. So they have to wear like Jason masks. And I swear, like leather face from chainsaw masks, or have to put hoods on.

It's gotta be weird when you're walking out of the science lab at Berkeley with the leather face mask on. You could freak out a couple of colleagues. But yes, all right, so crow's smart. Yeah. And for birds. Okay. We'll go up the food chain. We're going up food chain. Now we get to human beings and we get to people who I claim are smarter than they claim when they mishandle things, forget, forget, put my fingers up in air quotes, forget certain things and engage in a certain behavior because they don't screw up other things that seem to benefit them. Well, I was going to say smarter is a loaded term. It's not really smarter, it's prioritization, right? Is that what you would argue? I'll give you

an yes. Yeah. Yes. So it's prioritization but just to put it in layman's terms, they're super smart when it comes to stuff they're into. Yes. And kind of dumb when it's the stuff you need them to do. Which I argue means they had the capacity because I've seen what they can do when they're motivated, and I've also seen what they can't do when they're not interested. So when they then basically try to pass themselves off as unable to do the lesser tasks that I need them to do, I don't buy it because they can do the higher task that they're then interested in. That's what makes a good student. Just because you're not interested in math doesn't mean you can't apply yourself. So dig. Ah, apply yourself. See, I think

there's where the rubber hits the road. Isn't that ultimately what discipline is? When you're not motivated to do something, you can force yourself to do it as a matter of discipline structure. Have we discussed many times that that is not something many people experience these days? Certainly not in a very sustained, intensive way. I will take it a step further. I think it's discipline.

I think it's the very definition of maturity. Uh, nah, well, to be able to do, yeah, okay. As a kid. Okay, okay, okay, let me, let me, Because to me it's the difference between being a child and hopefully being an adult. It's slightly different, but I know what you're saying. Go ahead, finish. It's two things.

Yeah. It's discipline. It's also different. I know what you're saying. Go ahead finish. It's it's two things. Yeah, I it's discipline It's also something called character, which is I don't really want to do this, but I'm going to do it anyway You're actually folding in a lot of complex stuff. I don't disagree I think I think it's I think it's maturity I think it's character and I think it's discipline because a child basically wants to do what a child wants to do 24-7, a child wants to eat cotton candy for breakfast. At a certain point, you mature and you realize, well, I can't eat cotton candy for breakfast.

So it's taking a dominant impulse and choosing a subdominant motivated impulse as your motivation for behavior. And that is our frontal lobe, our prefrontal cortex, which comes about H25 for men if you're lucky enough, if you really do develop that part of your brain. Where do you develop that part of our brain? Education, other people, letting other people superimpose their brain on ours.

So you learn, so to speak. I think it's sports and discipline to have a lot to do with it. It's trusting other people to, having parents around all the time who use their prefrontal cortex to superimpose on ours when ours isn't fully developed yet. We don't have a lot of that these days.

So it's maturity in the sense that you're right, it is a late developing phase of the brain development that most people don't get today. Now. They don't get today. Now. They don't get to. Now. So to expect them to have that sort of capacity might be unrealistic. That capacity can be grafted onto their frontal lobe in the right setting.

That's your frontal lobe demanding it of them. That's not necessarily predictive that they'll be able to do it next time. I've broken many, many down and built them back up and had many many great success stories. Okay. Now when it comes to the topic of Gary Fultar, not Gary Haftar, who's in the he's in working on one of my race cars right now. Gary does a lot of stuff that's uh, suspect. I mean it shows a very diminished capacity. But then there's him leaving at

2.58 and a half every single day. Doesn't miss that. Never. Not, he leaves it, he's supposed to leave it three. He does not leave it 306. Well dig, even though Molly can't do those things he does, I bet when it comes time for the food to come down, Molly remembers. Molly go get that food. Yes. The stuffed animal.

Because it's for Molly. Yes. Latest and greatest is took my truck to drop off 10 rolls of insulation at the house Yesterday returned back to the shop and announced that he'd missed one roll in the back of the pickup truck Bought 10 rolls. He bought 10 rolls. He was then taking my pickup truck

To the house to drop off 10 rolls, came back. Now this thing's the size of a large comforter that's been stuffed into an oversized pillowcase. Yeah, it's about four feet across. Well, it's about two and a half. Whatever. It's big, it's bulky, it's in the back of the pickup truck. His then suggestion was he can just turn back around in my truck and head back up to the house and drop it off. Oh, I'm confused. How do you miss something that size in the back of a flatbed?

Well, first off, it's not your house and it's not your insulation. That's the number one way. It's not your gasoline, or in this case diesel fuel that you're driving right you're burning right right and it's not your money Yeah, that's your spending. Yeah, so those are the four main reasons on as to how you can miss this sort of distills down Your feelings about government expenditures Yes, he can so the suggestion is I can turn back around and drive your nice pickup truck Back up to your nice house and drop it off. Now at this point it's only one roll and it'll fit in the trunk of your car and when you're heading out in the next half hour you could swing by on your

dime, correct your mistake and drop it off, but that plan is not on the table. He then was going to turn around and head back up. That's basically somewhere about an hour's worth of my money and probably eight bucks worth of my diesel fuel and maybe ten and whatever but it's all on my dime because of a epic failure on your part and Gary's completely fine with that. He's a nice guy. Now the question is this, would that have happened if if it were his house, his insulation, his truck, and his fuel, and his money, his hourly wage? Number one. Number two, I don't believe this, was it subconsciously, maybe subconsciously, not intentionally, I don't believe, subconsciously

not pulled out of the truck so that he could turn around and go back up the hill and do this again. A little FU to you or just kill time? No, just a nicer time sitting in a nice truck with air conditioning going than it is sweeping up my shop. What do you think? Where, because this is pickup truck rolling around in the bed of an open pickup truck that by the way is black and that thing is white and pink.

How is that possible? I don't. You sure he didn't just leave it here and he was sort of covering for himself? I think that's what it was. I don't know. He left it here, came all the way down here, I went oh shit, I'm going to bring it back up the hill. No, no, no.

He put ten, he bought ten at the Home Depot and drove to my house with them in the back of the truck. Feels like there's something missing in this story, doesn't it? Well, there's, now, you know, he had the lights on back there with all the gates, all the barn doors closed on working on the car. I didn't tell you that one. Here? But here? Yes, here. Yes. Yes. I've encouraged him many times to turn the light on when you're working

on my car. Turn the light on. I just come back to be in the dark all the time and I go, turn the light on, Gary. So this time he had the work light, which is the big lights we use when we film things, but they have gates on them. Oh yeah, yeah. They have doors on them. An all time first, which is I walked in and every single one of them was shut.

Usually just the top one is shut because gravity brings it down and then I come and say, you've decreased your light by 33% and I tighten it up and swing it back up. But in this case, all four of them were shut if you wanna take a look at a picture of the light. Yeah, see he beat me on a technicality

because I always tell him to turn the light on. Yeah, he did that. Right. Also, there were four guys sitting on a sofa looking at him too that were about 12 feet in front of him who I yelled at as well. That's what you call collateral damage. Because I walked in, this daisy cutter just came into the room, stood there, looked to

my right, saw everyone sitting on the sofa, looked to my left, saw Gary with all the lights, all the doors shut on the light. Normally they scatter, they don't sit on the sofa. Who are these guys on the sofa? Oh, they didn't know I was coming. They do a lot of lounging when I'm not here. No, it's the one in these two, the one in these two. I have the nanny cam. No, Max Pata showed up, but he claims he's been there momentarily.

I went ahead and used a temperature gauge that I use for tires when I race to see how hot they are on the sofa pillow to gauge how long. What I do for everybody who comes in is I set the ambient temperature to 71 degrees then I get them to sit on the sofa for 20 minutes, 40 minutes, and an hour and a half and then I measure the heat that comes off the sofa after they stand up so I can tell how long they've been sitting. You know what I mean? Oh yeah I get it. Yeah. Perfect. Yeah. Genius. Turns out Chris had only been there for four hours and 20, sorry four minutes and 27 seconds so he was off the hook. So now Drew, the answer with the insulation is what? I feel like there's more to the story.

That's my thing. There's no more to the story. The answer is you put it in your car, take it home, that's what happens. Right. That's what you do,. That's the answer No, that's what will happen. Yeah now what shall I do about Gary well? Gary's good human being yeah, and he's not dishonest no, but there's some capacity that's diminished here But that one seems tough this one seems In what sense what do you mean like what to how to punish him is that? Well, let's put it to you this way. If Rob did not stop him from turning around, he was heading back up. And Gary does a lot of that. A lot of, oh, I didn't do what you told me to do, but don't worry, I'll redo it. But I'll do it on your dime and I'll buy the material.

Why did you chat with him about that? I don't know it's going to change anything. That's what you call sort of employee, that's just a pattern, you know what I'm saying? Okay. When people have a behavioral pattern, listen, you know this as well as I do. Getting people to change any fucking thing is extremely difficult.

Getting them to lose three pounds, getting them to drive differently, getting them to wear their effing seat belts, getting... and this is a long established behavioral work pattern. Well, yes. It's gonna be hard. Not unless you give him, like, put a sign up in his workspace where you reminder all the time. Well, look, getting the gardener to shut the gate was very difficult until the fifth time

he didn't do it and I just deducted 50 bucks from his paycheck and then he shut the gate. That's pretty easy. I don't know that you can... Unfortunately, oh that works perfectly. No, I know. I just don't know you can do that to people. You can on the sixth time. I think if you put it in writing and say here's what I'm going to do... I don't have to put it in writing. I tell you five times to do something.

The sixth time, I'll take money away. And then there'll be no seventh time. That's how people work. Now, the reason, Drew, it's getting more and more difficult to tell people anything. It's not because the tasks have become more difficult. The people have become more difficult is the people have become more difficult their F you there. I had this with Lynette yesterday, although Lynette I've happily broken

and It was It was good. Oh No, no, tell me I I was asked to take Molly for a walk. And at a certain point, because I'm busy and I'm sane, I start saying things like, I'm going to put a hook on the inside of the door and the entry hall closet, and we will hang Molly's leash on that hook,

and that's where it will live. And when it comes time to walk Molly, there'll be no more opening up cupboard doors, going upstairs, going into the kitchen, thrashing around, spending stupid time. There's smart time in life, there's enjoyable time, relax it, you don't, all right, dig. Dig.

Dig. You don't have to be working all the time. There's plenty of time for stupid time. Like, I mean, relaxation time. Right, right. Stretch out on the beach. Have a pina colada. I'm not saying you need to work all the time.

There's relaxation time. Kick back, watch some TV. There's, I'm gonna get something done, the time. There's relaxation time, kick back, watch some TV. There's I'm going to get something done, work time, and then there's stupid time, which is I'm going to wander around my house looking for a dog's leash. That's stupid time. I'm not enjoying myself. I'm not making any money. I'm just walking in a circle. What you want to do now, there's's gonna be X amount of that in life. Let's try to shrink that time so that we can enlarge either the work time

or the pleasure time. Possibly both. Eliminate stupid time. Let's eliminate stupid time. I'd be a great college basketball coach. So I attempt to eliminate stupid time by asserting and engaging in certain patterns like we'll just hang it here. And that's the way it'll work. And for the most

part it's been working out. But the other day I was going to walk Molly and I opened the door and there was no leash hanging on the inside of the door. So how did you break Lynette? I then walked into the kitchen and found the leash. The following day I was taking Molly for a walk and I could not find the leash again or it was a couple days later and this time I found it outside, physically outside the house by the front door, but outside. And then Lynette was taking the dog for a walk the other day and I said, FYI, let's

make sure and get that thing back on the hook each and every time because the last two times I took Molly for a walk, I had to search around the house for it. Certainly that was enough to get her to do it. No, that was met with, I think Olga took her for a walk last time and I said, no, that was you. Well, sometimes Olga, I said, let's, it wasn't Olga and let's just put it back in the same place each time so we don't have to look around for it. And she went, started with a third lap and said, okay, fine, you're right, let's do it. And I said, good.

Did she do it? Yeah, oh, I gotta go home and check. No, no, the point, I don't know if she did or not. I didn't spend 45 minutes arguing. She threw it in the pool. No, what I'm saying, this engagement didn't end with why are you such an asshole. It did not end with why are you such an asshole. No, she just thought that.

It ended with I'll put it on the hook. Not for me so much because I don't walk the dog nearly as much as she does, mostly for her. Let's go back to the discipline thing. And it works and I said she's happy and now and we're not arguing, we don't argue. She called her boyfriend. Listen, I don't, when it did these hurdles that were almost, these aren't hurdles that are up, they're not hurdles that are lowered, they're hurdles that have fallen over. And we're asking people to clear hurdles that have already been kicked over. When did that become too tall an order in life, Drew?

When did I become a monster for asking for what would be considered very basic things that, by the way, I shouldn't even instigate? Yeah, that's true. I mean, it just states, your house that's true. I mean just states your house it's your dog's your leash. When did these things... No Lynette is great and things are working great around the house and it's good. It's good for me because I don't have to look for the leash. It's good for her because she doesn't have to look for the leash and there's nothing personal in it. It's just

we both like the leash where we can find it, so it's time-saving and we don't have to engage in stupid time. I think it goes back to that issue of discipline. As I watch my kids go through college and stuff and really gain capacity to do stuff when they don't wanna do it and do lots of it. That's a, and by the way, these were people

that already were pretty disciplined. Yeah. We're not, I don't know. I'll tell you. Where did you get it is my question, is that? All right, here's part of, okay, two things. Part of the problem. Part of the problem is we are not working as a society

either in a micro or macro level. we have let everyone off the hook. We've let everybody off the hook. There's no more judging. There's no, on a micro level, when Adam Carolla says to his wife, hey, I put a hook up in the closet, let's put the leash in the same place every time. I get a unanimous chorus of, oh my God. Well good luck with that. How's that going to work for you? It's like, I think it's a pretty reasonable request and it's not for me, it's mostly for her but why is everyone so freaked out over the fact that I had a request that was pretty reasonable

And when I talk to people I do interviews they go well But if you're gone shopping lately and gone I go now I don't go shopping and my wife goes shopping and they go you don't have to go to the supermarket I go now she does that well How does she feel about that I go I go on the road every fucking weekend and work And then I work every weekday and I make a bunch of money and then I give her the money and she can go shop. How does that work?

I'm like, are you fucking nuts? What are we talking about here? What have we? We've evolved as a society into this. We're letting almost everybody off the hook and it ain't good. Whether you're a student, a wife, a husband who should stick around and raise your child, whether you're someone who should pay for your child's lunch at school or and or make it at home the night before We have let almost everyone off the hook. It's time we start asking for more of people for me. I Took a look around at

my friends my environment my family and I went well this ain't working and my family, and I went, well this ain't working, and then I realized part of the reason why it wasn't working was these people weren't hard enough on themselves. They weren't asking enough of themselves. You actually had that conscious thought. I had the thought. How old were you? I was in my, I probably started my early 20s. Oh, so it wasn't like you were seven years old going holy shit I gotta buckle down. Well I knew I couldn't buckle down scholastically because I couldn't really read or spell so I just I couldn't do it in the classroom and I wouldn't do it in the classroom but I knew I could do it physically right I knew I could do it on the football field and I could live

in the weight room and I could just focus you the football field, and I could live in the weight room, and I could just focus. I'd be at the football field at midnight running sprints and stuff like that, just weirdo movie montage stuff. But so already there was some satisfaction in bearing down. You didn't consciously have the thought that I'm doing the opposite of what these people are doing. I'm gonna bear down, and I'm gonna push myself, and I'm gonna be hard on myself, and I'm gonna the opposite of what these people are doing. I'm going to bear down, and I'm going to push myself, and I'm going to be hard on myself,

and I'm going to inflict pain on myself. Well, is that some sort of acting out? Things are so shitty at home, so I'm used to pain. I'm just reenacting that on a football field. Probably there was an element of I wanted to be good playing football. That's the only thing I was good at. I thought maybe I could get out of this town or something if I could get good at football.

And then later on in life, I just saw everybody just sort of, you know, where I come from, everyone is basically my buddy Ray. Ray is not, Ray is going to turn 50 in two months. Ray lives in an apartment. Ray may or may not have a checking account. Ray has a credit card, but it was canceled a few years ago because it was in his mom's name and she passed away. You don't understand where I come from.

I come from people that are, I mean, almost, look, they're not, they're able-bodied, but you may as well put them in a wheelchair and have them propel it with a fucking stick they use that's in their mouth. That's who they are. That's who my, many of my family, a lot of my family's that way. Friends, you don't realize what, I mean, I mean, you see it, you understand this sort of cycle in the inner city sort of thing, but there's a version of this, just that poor sort of apartment. Ray's parents lived in an apartment, Ray lives in an apartment. It's just a sort of cycle of stupidity, lethargy, poverty, and I just realized I needed to kick

my own ass. And the second thing I needed to do is find people that were doing something other than what all my valley buddies were doing, which was nothing, and hang out with them. Right. And figure out what they did. And then you learned discipline.

You indoctrinated yourself. I learned that I wasn't as different. I was not, the basic ingredients and components of me were the same as them. That meaning successful people. Yeah, like I hung around with a guy named Shelby Coffey III who was the editor in chief of the Los Angeles Times. And he was the head of the whole newspaper. He was the nicest guy

in the world. And he was like, oh man, you're funny, you're bright, you're this and that and the other. And I was like, oh, we're not so different, you and I. I grew up around the, you know, sitting around with a depressed mom watching, you know, Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous and oh, please, those people. You could never, you know, like there was some sort of chasm between the haves and the have nots. You'll never be able to make it up. That those people did it by dishonest means. That was sort of her thing.

She didn't break it down that way, but she believes and still believes that rich people don't pay taxes and that most people that are rich are sort of, were kissed in, kind of daddy's money. White privilege part of it. How does she explain you? Oh, well that's different.

It's always, whatever cases you give, it's always an anomaly. And I do comedy, that's not, she's talking about big oil, big farming, stuff like that. All right, but basically what I did is I beat myself up a lot. I Didn't scream who you're so stupid, but I was like get your shit together work harder Did you have to get work hard at you as well? No Cuz I like there's nobody to yell at me

I lived amongst those people because like in you know in the people again They wanted to know where I was going when I went out to go do my ground link class that night. Yeah. And they'd go, what are you doing? And I'd go, I'm going in and they, how much do they pay you? And I'm like, I pay them. And they'd be like, you're fucking idiot if you're paying them.

And that was how it worked. Yeah. And I think about, again, my kids think about my own experience in college and then training and residency and stuff. You have people yelling at you all the time. Yes. All the time. Telling you, you're a piece of shit.

You're an asshole. And you go, yes, sir. It's like the military. I never had anyone yell, certainly no one in my family, of course. They wanted me just to live in a house in Lacrosse Center with four dudes for the rest of my life. All right. They didn't want me to, but they didn't care one way or the other.

That was it. I yelled at myself. I would be embarrassed. That's a unique thing, I think. Yeah, well, it shouldn't be so unique. I'm going to take Ray as the example again. I mean, Ray is now insightful. He understands.

No. He's insightful. I'll tell you how to get Ray. When Ray shows up every once in a while, and he say to me, you know said to me eight years ago I'm doing morning radio. Hey, man. Can I do like a regular? regular bit like like like like a like a Friday bit like something like Ray's corner or something like that like a reoccurring bit and I said I wanted to get rid of him So I just said yeah

Tell you what write down ten ideas and show them to me. Well, never heard from him again because now he's required to do something. These people are all the same. But he shows up for Ace on the House. Yeah, he does. He's capable of some things. I mean, incapable. Yeah, no, he's not incapable but when he says I want to do something, I want to raise my

whatever, he can't stretch stretch You can't do it none of these guys can do see the whole deal is going home and writing down ten ideas To be on my morning show Are you sitting down? You don't get paid for that you don't get your dick sucked for that you don't get a hit off a cigarette for it You don't get a slice of cherry pie, and you don't get any cocaine. You do that on your own. And you get nothing back. You get no peanut M&Ms for that.

Now I could stand there with a change belt over him, like a retarded gay ice cream man, and say, Ray, every time you write down an idea, I go to the change belt, I get out $10, and I put that $10 worth of quarters down. He would do that. Anyone would do it. The question is, who's gonna go do it without me there? Well, I'll tell you who would do it.

I did it, Jimmy Kimmel did it. You didn't do it, you got yelled at by Rich Danny. So, but in terms of people who are listening, learning something about this, so the real message is reach. Do it. Right? I'll tell you the real... Do it for nothing. I did radio for 10 years for nothing. Do everything for nothing.

I thought it was important. I thought it was interesting. The response to Why's in the Leash hanging in the closet is never when did you take your asshole pills. The answer is you're right. That was stupid. It's never going to happen again. That's the answer. Not for me, for you. I would take it back to where you and I started this conversation where you talked about

I missed a couple of beats and I screwed up on some things or bringing Howard to your house and stuff. I want it to never happen again. I'm not sure. Now you've just let yourself off the hook. Well, I hope it's never going to happen. I mean to good. Oh, you hope. All right. Well, go get a little statue of Howard and rub it and hope But but you understand I'm saying I know I think now Here's the deal. It's never gonna happen again That I'm a progress on perfection. I'm embarrassed progress not perfection never gonna happen. Look

I don't even if it happens again. Don't leave the window open not that Howard could make it through the window It's got a large carriage. No what what I'm saying is when you say to people, when you say out loud, I am going to try for this not to happen, but I cannot guarantee it. You've left the door wide open for it to happen again. I'll guarantee it. There you go. Now shush. Then you're going to be really pissed if it doesn't shut. No, no, I will not. You just say it will never happen again.

And maybe it will, maybe it won't. Do not leave a window cracked in your mind, because when you qualify it with, I'll try or I can't make any promises, then, you know what's interesting? Window open. I had an emotional shift when you said that. I went like, oh, but if I say that, I do it,

I'll feel really shitty. Well, that's good. That's good, but if I say that, I do it, I'll feel really shitty. Well, that's good. That's good. That's what I want. I want you to feel horrible all the time. Yeah. All right. I do.

And that goes for all of you. Yeah. Let's take a quick break back with Drew. You have a call you like? I like all of them. The effects of electric cigarettes. My agent was smoking one of those yesterday. Yeah.

Dr. Bruce brought in some like inhaler thing for nicotine. I wanna know about those things. That's two different things. All right, quick break. Hey, it's Adam Kroll from the Adam Kroll Show. BetOnline is the world's most trusted betting platform and your number one source for online betting, from the earliest odds to in-game live betting.

BetOnline provides you with all the action and the ability to watch and bet on games as they happen with the largest selection of odds on everything from football, NBA, college basketball as well. BetOnline has NHL, MMA, and championship boxing, all your betting needs in one place. Head to BetOnline today to get in on the action with America's most trusted site for online wagering. So have some fun, make these games and these events and these combat sports a little more interesting with Bet Online.

Bet Online! The game starts here! Yeah, let me tell you about our good friends over at GoToMeeting. You want to get the team together? Seems impossible. How do you do it? Use GoToMeeting with HDFaces brought to you by Citrix. Love these guys. You can share your documents, your spreadsheets, you collaborate in HD. Drew, you use these guys. I use these guys too. They're great. Again, you can use documents that you have on your computer. You can show them to your people at the meeting they can add stuff on your document

You can see theirs. It's amazing. I did the whole man. Gria meeting with our guys shiners up north and They're drinking red wine This meeting which made me really want some of that red wine Anyway, but I have a problem. Yeah, by the way Yeah, let's grab man. Gria White coming out very soon, Dr. Drew. The flavors? Delectable.

For the ladies in the summer. Peach and pear, yeah. Go to Meeting as you can use on your Mac, your PC, you can use on your iPhone or your iPad. So, start hosting the meetings. Let's do it today. Go to Meeting and try it for free. 30 days free.

Visit gotomeeting.com. Click on the Try It free 30 days free visit go to meeting.com click on the try it free button used to promo code Adam. All right let's blow through some calls here Drew and talk to Steve Steve. Hey Dr. Drew and Adam I just had a question about e-cigarettes. Yeah. I spoke for a number of years and it's been pretty popular lately I just wonder if they are safer than cigarettes, if they can still cause cancer. It's just sort of a lowdown on them. Unfortunately, I can't give you absolute. They've not been around long enough for anyone

to really figure out what they're doing, right? I think that's the issue. There's phenols in them, and there's concern about them, this, that. What are phenols? It's like an organic hydrocarbon. And my point is, I think it's better than nicotine cigarettes. I really do.

Well, sure. The question is, is it half? We don't know. One-tenth? I think it's going to be orders of magnitude. Yeah, like a tenth is risky. So all things being equal, I am in favor of taking risk if you need to to get off cigarettes. But you're not into methadone.

Oh, I'm not saying stay on them forever necessarily. But this is cigarette methadone in a weird way. In a weird way, but people normally seem to get off the e-cigarettes. They don't stay on them forever. Bruce gave me a shot of this nicotine inhaler thing. That's a different thing, yeah. First off- That you can stay on forever.

You can. Yeah, I'm fine with that you can stand the gums I was beaked out of my brain for like three hours just one Not only that off this thing I took I hit on it like it was a bong But I mean and I didn't know what the fuck Bruce such an idiot, you know He just shoved it. Yeah, I just sucked it up and I was like, oh son I was beaked out of my mind for like three hours. Yeah.

Well, the most significant window to successfully get off cigarettes is the first two weeks. So I tell people during those two weeks, use whatever nicotine replacement you want, provide you don't have heart disease, you know, be careful. But use a lot of it. Use multiple patches, multiple lozenges, multiple gum. Use the inhalers if you want. I mean, really suppress the withdrawal and then kind of taper it down. That inhaler, I don't know if, like I said, the one that Bruce got me, it's got all these

little liquids and different flavors and I think it's going to be a problem with kids. All that did was make me feel like running around the block ten times as fast as I could naked. Well, you're not an addicted smoker. You're not a dependent smoker. But this seemed like a huge shot of Nick. I mean, it felt to me like caffeine was injected into an artery. That's what it felt like to me.

It's too much. If you're a two-pack a day smoker, maybe that's right. You know what I'm saying? If you're a two-pack a day smoker, maybe that's right. Oh, maybe you're right. All right. Shall we, uh, diabetic husband, hasn't had sex with husband in four months, uh, trying to get off the Oxycontin. Oh, boy. Uh, diabetic, huh? These are heavy. James?

Yes, hey, Adam A, Dr. Drew. What's going on, James from Tampa? What's up? Uh, well, you know, I, uh, had a back injury back in 2008, and, well, you know, I had a back injury back in 2008. And you know, they started off with a Vicodin-Soma combo. And then they changed the laws down here. Let me just say for everybody, I don't care who you are, how old you are, you have a back injury and you need opiates,

do not take them longer than two weeks. I don't care if you frickin' had a diesel truck roll over you. Two weeks is your limit. After that, you start working on getting off because there's actually no evidence that opioids are effective chronically. They're for acute pain. So if you're using them chronically, probably you got a problem. And they're showing-

Meaning they're for severe pain, I cannot sleep tonight. Surgery. I need it. Like surgery. Right. But they're not meant to be taken daily to deal with your backgery. I need it. Like surgery. Right. But they're not meant to be taken daily to deal with your back pain. They are not. In fact, they will intensify pain with time and they will become the problem.

So here we are. And being a diabetic, I've been abstaining now for two weeks from taking any kind of Oxy's or anything like that at all. But being a diabetic and I get the sweats when my sugar gets low or high and all that stuff, I'm not sure if I'm still feeling the symptoms of the withdrawal or what's going on. And I don't really have a doctor right now and no insurance. Okay. Well, I guarantee you're still having some withdrawal. So that's not surprising. And you're going to have sleep problems for months.

That's just the nature of this problem. But God bless you for making it two weeks. That's the worst part. You're through the worst of it, my friend. You are through it. Good job. And I'm sure the pain got worse. I'm sure everything got worse, but I bet your pain's a lot better now.

Keep it up. Oh yeah. Thanks, James. Really, James. Well done. I got to say this, too. Go to some meetings, dude. NA meetings. Go ahead. Maybe it's just me.

I played football, I did construction, I had wrenched my back a million times. But I don't know anyone who's had back surgery that it either worked or was really necessary or anyone who's had a back problem. I have a rule of thumb. What is going on with backs in our society? I have a rule of thumb. You do not have back surgery for pain. You do back surgery if you're having motor consequences, like the nerve is being compressed

and suddenly your leg atrophies, you have surgery. Because we're not trying to correct the pain, we will correct the motor weakness, the motor dysfunction and save your leg. But the pain may get worse with the surgery. Like I said, anything to do with the back, the pain, the meds, the surgery, it always just literally backfires. Did you remember the back pain when I was depressed, I had severe, what it would be is I would wake up in the morning and I could not turn my head.

And I was 22 and Strong's an ox, healthy as a horse. I could not turn my head. It felt like almost, it felt like someone injected poison into my neck. And I literally literally I could not When I couldn't look over my shoulder, I could not Turn my head and I had many of those days and I was in my early mid-20s and Like I said in just fantastic shape and that was that I've gone all the way through my

30s and 40s, basically never having a back pain, never having neck pain, doing construction, racing cars, you know, doing boxing, doing stuff that could be considered strenuous or vigorous and never having a situation and being put in stressful situations but stressful stuff I wanted to do, not stressful. Fuckin' I hate my life, I hate my foreman, I hate my life, I hate my truck, I hate my apartment, I hate everything. Interestingly, although I have weights all the time is probably why I have this, I've not had a day without pain.

Really? Since I was like 22. Right now I have horrible shoulder pain. I have neck pain and back pain I have horrible genetics for that. I would never listen, but I would never contact I don't even take an Advil for it. I wouldn't contemplate it such a Viking hero No, I listen to true point is I I arrow that's the way you go I must get skeletal pain is just part of being upright. You know, it's just... Take that test of yours. Let's see how you score.

16. Okay. What was Robin's score? Like a 38 or something. Okay. And what was mine? 21, I think. Much higher than you.

Not much. All right. Teresa? Hi. What's going on right. Teresa? Hi. What's going on? I love you guys. I love listening to you together and you just crack me up and thank you for taking my call. It's our pleasure.

What's going on? My husband is diabetic. He is 53 years old and he's very healthy, tall, active, not overweight or anything. He has some weird,his pancreas just stopped working so they put a pump on him, I would say probably about eight months ago. Hold on a second. So he got sudden onset type 1 diabetes? Well they said that he's not really type 2 and he's not really type 1 and he was on medication, you know doing the shots and everything. Hang on a second, he's not obese and he's not an alcoholic?

No, absolutely not. Does he have other endocrine disturbances? Did he have multiple glands go out at the same time? No, he's just, you know, he was a farm kid. He's just been, always just been really healthy. Okay, alright. So now he's got this sort of...there are no genetics for that in his family? No. Well, his parents say no, but there was never really any contact with the rest of the family, so we don't really know. All right.

So now he's on an insulin pump. Okay. Good. That's a sophisticated way to deal with that. Good. Oh, well, it's really helped a lot. His H1C is still really high, but it's a lot less than it used to be. Okay.

Anyway, he cannot achieve an erection? Yes, and then if he takes a medication, if he takes a Viagra, it works, but then he gets this massive headache. Oh, jeesh. Okay, here's the deal. I feel so bad for him. Yeah, but Trisha, here's the deal. He probably went for quite some time with his sugars out of control, right? Yes.

Okay, and His H1C used to be 13. Ugh, awful. And now it's 8.5. Alright, but here's the deal is that the first thing to go when a guy, particularly even young men, when they have blood sugars out of control is erectile function. Peck-a-roo. Peck-a-roo. And that's how I get young males to pay attention to sugars.

I go, hey, penis never gonna work again if you don't watch it. Boom, they shape right up. But this actually usually restores the penis function comes back once he gets the sugars under control and has it sustained for many months. So I think you can look forward to, Teresa, to this getting much better. As you said, he's still not good.

His hemoglobin A1C needs to be six and his daily blood sugars need to be 80 to 120, then his rectal function will be a lot better. Ruby? Hello? What's going on? Calling from Denver. What's going on, Ruby?

I love Denver. Thank you so much for taking my call. I've been married to my husband for going on five years. We have a set of identical teen girls who I carry full-term. So that is just to give you an idea of how my body might have changed. I was five and a half feet around, so a very average frame before that. Wait, what? Say that again.

What? You were what? Five and a half feet around? I was five and a half feet around, yeah. I carried them to eight pounds apiece. Oh! So my stomach, I know. So my stomach just really stretched out.

So you were 66 inches around. When they went around you, you were 66 inches. Yes. Were you diabetic during pregnancy? No, not at all. I mean, I had a really healthy pregnancy. Pretty easy. I was not on bed rest.

I apparently was made to have twins. All right. All right. So that's to give you an idea of what my stomach might look like. It did not go back to normal. So I have some body identification issues that's beginning idea like more like my stomach might look like it did not go back to normal i have come from body uh... identification issue just you know pre

we've been body with a little bit but my husband and i uh... habit had back in four months we talk about it like it talking about uh... what kind of you know we're gonna have that we can only agree now i would have to expect that we can't and then we go uh... fashion week you know like we know are we gonna have sex this week? Yeah and then we don't. No fashion. Yeah. Yes and so we had a therapist last year who went to a couple of therapy and she suggested a couple things like massages that don't lead to sex to kind of open those intimate doors and we tried it a few times but my husband says he's really interested, but there's no sex in our lives.

I mean, we talk about it and... Okay, hold on. Slow down. Okay. Whoa, whoa, whoa. How old are the twins? They are three. Did you breastfeed?

I did for 19 months. Okay. So that just wrapped up. Have you regained your libido? Do you have normal cycling? Do you want to have sex? I have normal cycling. I do want to have sex. I'll have to say I don't want to have sex? I have normal cycling.

I do want to have sex. I'll have to say I don't want to have sex as much as I did prior to the kids. Right. But she's putting it on him. Is it on him? I know. I know my issues. I really like to be like warmed up.

I need to be warmed up more than I used to. I mean he could show me his erection when we were dating and I would be ready to go, you know, and now I need foreplay I need work done on me and he is a tired dad of two who works really hard and it seems like That's why he is Uninterested because he's tired. He goes to bed at nine o'clock at night when the kids do and you know, they're in a Yeah, I got a race car back there. Yeah.

And it needs to be warmed up. Yeah. But I don't need to be in it. We plug it in. Hold on a second. Oh, I see. You want her to plug herself in? I just hop her in the back, you plug it in, and you warm that oil up about a half hour

later and then I get in the car. I don't need to sit in the car while it's warming up. Maybe she warms herself up a little bit then he helps. Yeah. Finished to warm. You guys are going to have to meet in the middle here somewhere. Look, I understand what's going on. Look, he's not as motivated. We all know a guy who's sexually motivated and What they'll do they will walk through a hundred miles Glass yeah barefoot So and they'll chew through fence at the end

They'll chew through fence to get to the broken glass walk barefoot through so he ain't into that and You don't you know, she's not walking through the broken glass either so you guys are going to have to kind of meet somewhere in the middle. You know, the therapist who does the thing, who does the massage that doesn't go anywhere sexually at a certain point and, you know, I'll bring up my buddy Ray again as a negative example. He sat around and talked with my dad for 15 years about how to get his shit together. In a way, it was used as a placebo or a sugar pill or a nicotine patch for not getting your

shit together because you're engaged every day or once a week in talking with someone who can't get their shit together, by the way, about getting your shit together. And I always said to Ray, look, you can sit and talk about it all you want or you can get a clipboard and a belt that has a tape measure on it and start wearing shoes instead of flip-flops on the job site. And when I say where's your tape measure instead of running out to the truck you'd have it on your belt and you'd be cured. At least you would act as if. You know what I'm saying? So you can talk about aromatherapy with a massage that doesn't lead to sex or you can just start fucking. Well here's the fact, though, is that during childhood is the bottom, the low, the nadir

for marriage satisfaction. So every marriage hits the skids a bit, at least, during the childhood years. So you have to kind of bear down and get through that, plus postpartum, after delivery, women typically have a marked reduction in their libido, especially if they're breastfeeding, especially twins, the stress of twins. So you A, wanna talk to your physician about maybe some hormonal therapies that might kickstart things a little bit.

B, plug yourself in and heat the oil up, as Adam says, make sure the oil's not so viscous. And maybe lower your expectation a little on the I need to be warmed up. Well, ah, but the other part of this is the interpersonal piece, which is not about the massage. It's about realizing and teaching your husband, who doesn't know this, is that foreplay includes dinner.

So you have to include face-to-face time where you focus on the relationship and you spend time focusing on each other. And eventually this stuff kind of takes care of itself if you hang in together unlike the IRS if they're after you. Oh. Right? They never unplug themselves. They never unplug.

They're always viscous. If you have the IRS over $20,000 in back taxes, are you being audited, have unfilled returns, tax resolution services? This is a serious problem. The IRS is brutal and you can't fight on your own. No. You need the experts at tax resolution services. They will deal with the IRS on your behalf. They have been saving people's financial life for 15 years. Do not live in fear anymore. No more sleepless nights. No more garnish wages. Deal with this now before it gets worse. And the fact is, when you're on your ass, before you get a new job,

that's when you have the negotiating power. These guys can really help you. Call Tax Resolution Services today, 800-905-0169, 800-905-0169, or click through the tax resolution banner on and at adamcroll.com. But in all seriousness, this stuff, this sounds like a relationship, what's her name, Ruby and her husband.

I think if they have commitment and if they pay attention, again, find the time to nurture emotional intimacy, the physical intimacy will come along. All right, so remember, if you'd like to donate, we figured out $2, all of you, $2 a month. That is 12 and a half cents a show for me Andrew doesn't seem too lofty You can donate by clicking through the PayPal donate button or set the donation subscription two bucks a month

donation subscription how about it people's and If you want to keep the ship afloat try some of that mangria baby it's gonna be seen in white all right so until next time this is Adam Corolla for dr. Drew Chris Maxipan and Gary Haftar saying Mahalo this is Corolla Digital.