The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - Charlie Chartercorn Must Die (The Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics)
Episode Date: August 12, 2023Adam and Drew open up the show with Dr. Drew exceptionally fired up about the situation with Ben Stiller needing to have his prostate out due to cancer and the ridiculous reaction that Drew believes S...tiller has been getting on social media with dangerous medical advice. The conversation then turns back to the conditions in California and the distaste that both Adam & Drew have with the apparent direction in which politicians seem to want to take things using charter schools as an example. Adam and Drew review a commercial for the 1970s perfume 'Charlie by Revlon'. The guys also discuss Adam's son's disinterest in organized sports and Adam's frustration with that and his fear that it will mean he's missing some of the grit that Adam and Drew so adore.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome back to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics.
First up for today, episode 434, released October 13th, 2016, titled Stiller Pinsky.
Dr. Drew starts things off fired up about the situation around Ben Stiller's prostate
removal due to cancer, and the ridiculous reactions on social media propagating dangerous
medical advice.
What's going on?
I don't know how to express this without seeming like an asshole, but...
Oh, you're never an asshole.
I'm just so concerned about what is going down as medical information and medical science.
Mm-hmm. down as medical information and medical science.
I mean,
the vaccine thing on one hand,
Rob Schneider is raining stuff down on me about
how terrible vaccines are.
And blue light.
And blue light is going to kill everybody.
What's the blue light? You have to wear these
special glasses to prevent the blue lights
off your phone. Or what's going to happen? Brain tumors?
Or cancer?
Some crazy nonsense. special glasses to prevent the blue lights off your phone or what's going to happen, brain tumors or what the hell. Or cancer.
It's some crazy nonsense.
It could kill you.
Look, here's the deal, guys.
We're lucky to be alive.
Keep moving.
Put your head up.
Put your head down.
We'll go to work. Go to work.
We live in unbelievably – we should be grateful for the amount of gratitude we should have for the medical science.
The Nick, about the 19th century, turn of the century, 1900, 1899, a 1900 hospital,
where the opening episode, the doctor is giving a eulogy and he goes,
and now people at the turn of the century, a male born today can expect to live to 46 years of age.
Right.
I mean, for God's sakes, everybody.
So, look, the reason I PO'd is Ben Stiller last week talked about his prostate cancer.
He has the exact same story I have.
Actually, mine was a little bit different, but his was a little more aggressive, had
to come out right away, and that's the way it goes.
Now people are again piling on him going, no, no, people do not need to get tested for
this.
You don't understand. The doctors are just make money taking prostates out. Like,
oh, for Christ's sake. Oh, for Christ's fucking sake. My life was cured. My life was saved.
I had a cancer that started to grow. I can show it to you. It's on a path specimen.
And we watched it for a while. I didn't get it out right away. I waited two years of surveillance,
and then it really started to move. And then we took it out.. I didn't get it out right away. I waited two years of surveillance, and then it really started to move.
And then we took it out.
And the guy that took it out was a guy who I sat down with, and he was not interested in my nutrition.
He was not interested in my well-being or psychology.
I want to know what kind of shape your wallet was in, dude.
He did 12.
He'd done 1,200 of these.
I said, what's your complication rate?
Zero.
Fine.
He had zero complications after 1,200 procedures.
And that's all I want him to fucking do is do that procedure all day and have no more – because that's a hard – it took him 14 years to get to the point where he could do that procedure.
And he's a genius with it.
I don't want him worrying about blue light, nutrition.
I want him doing that goddamn procedure.
And people always go, why don't doctors worry about nutrition? I don't want him thinking about nutrition. I want him doing that goddamn procedure. And people always go, why don't doctors worry about nutrition?
I don't want him thinking about nutrition. I want him doing that
robotic prostatectomy for other
men. What's the matter, Gary? Why is that funny?
Because I just listened to the podcast
that got me fired up about this.
Where I got fired up about it? Yeah.
You were on The Fighter and the Kid, and they were asking you why
doctors don't care about nutrition. You're basically
repeating it. I listened to it today. I remember that's where
I got that, but that's not where I intended to go with this. What was upsetting me was the people saying, don't get your PS. You're basically repeating it. I listened to it today. I remember that's where I got that, but that's not where I intended to go with this.
What was upsetting me was the people saying don't get your PS.
You mean you're conflicting your own opinions?
No, no.
It was the same opinion.
I just got it fired up.
They asked him, why aren't doctors more worried about nutrition when he said, people are always
asking me.
I listened to it three hours ago.
And I said the same thing about the surgeon again.
And it just re-triggered that thought.
But my bigger problem is, gentlemen, if you have a
first-degree relative with prostate cancer, particularly diagnosed at a young age, get your
PSA started at 40. Everyone else, 50. Do it. Don't fucking believe bullshit you read on the internet.
Let the experts that spend their entire life studying this stuff make the determination.
When I go to a doctor, I just go, do what you do. Do your job. Use your judgment and just tell me what to do.
I don't second guess them.
I don't talk about it.
I know what the training they've had.
I just ask them to please do their job.
And a PSA saved Ken Ben Stiller's life, saved my life.
Don't argue with us about it.
PSA stands for?
Prostate Specific Antigens.
It's a blood test.
You should have it too every year.
All right.
I should do it.
You haven't done it?
I don't know if I've had a prostate check. You should have it too every year. Alright, I should do it. You haven't done it? I don't know if I've had a prostate
check.
You're 52.
Yeah, definitely. Colonoscopy?
No. Oh, dude, we're going to do this together.
Okay. I'm going to have one in December.
Oh, you are? Yeah, let's go.
I'll circle my calendar.
Yeah, I'll go with you.
Anyway, Twitter gets me
wacky upset sometimes.
Oh, you know, I don't pay attention to anything.
So it's easier to be me.
I know.
I'm oversensitive.
And I care about this shit.
That's what I spent my whole life doing.
And so it's like it's so troubling.
On one hand, I just go, all right, you guys want to let your life, your kids and everything, you just let it go?
Fine, enjoy.
Just let it go.
On the other hand, I spent my life doing this and I care about it.
Yeah, I don't.
We've been dealing with it for a long time, celebrities and others, thinking they have some information.
First off, the only information that these celebrities have are articles that have been written in rags or online
that have been spoon-fed to them.
They've not done any form of research
themselves.
They've not seen...
For instance,
when you're making a decision
about a vaccine,
have you seen somebody die of measles?
I've seen many die of measles.
I've seen horrible cases of measles.
You ever seen one?
No.
So to them, it doesn't even exist.
But the thing that's insanely pompous
about the whole thing, Drew, is said celebrity blowhard, whoever that is, blowhard du jour.
This was some random Twitter.
No, no.
But I'm talking about when the celebrities go blowhardy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right?
They are not out in the field collecting samples and hammering them in the lab.
They read an article written by an asshole.
Right.
And things don't become – in science, things don't become standard until they've been reproduced dozens or hundreds of times.
So a single article for somebody who actually is familiar with the field and converse in the literature in that field, a single article goes down as, all right, note taken.
Let's see if anything comes of this someday.
You don't go, that's the answer.
That's it.
Never.
Never.
The asshole celebrity just read an article online that somebody else wrote.
Yeah, and it sounds good, so that's it.
That's the answer.
As opposed to the many, many hundreds of articles that are contrary to that.
Yes. I don't get that part. many hundreds of articles that are contrary to that. Yes.
I don't get that part.
Sometimes thousands of articles.
Well, I've always felt that way about the expert, the whatever.
Sometimes I enjoy telling experts when they go, I go to a barber.
You know what I mean?
I sit down in the chair and they ask me every time, what do you do with the back of your neck?
You like it square, flat?
You like it square or you like it round?
I go, well, whatever you like.
You're the expert.
You're standing there.
You do it the way you like it.
I don't walk behind myself.
And as they start cutting, you go, hey, hey, hey.
Whoa, what about, did you, what about that?
I don't do that.
Because you don't know what they're doing.
I don't know what they're doing, but they cut hair for a living, and they're standing behind me.
And so I ask them, how would they like it?
What do they think looks best?
And then they do it that way, and guess who never thinks about it ever?
Well, I think the bigger analogy is swinging a door.
How many people are going to tell you how to do that?
That happens all the time?
People tell you to swing a door and how to do that?
Well, it is the one thing I do miss about carpentry is nobody bothered you.
I mean, you got to be an expert, and all you'd have to do is start sliding into butts and side and strike side and setbacks and stuff like that.
And they knew they couldn't do it.
They didn't know how to put a bevel or what degree the bevel should be on the
you should have a bevel
on the hinge side and on the knob
side. But they never
had any inkling as how that could be done
and therefore they never had an opinion.
Like to have an opinion about a vaccine
you should have had
years of study of biology
of all kinds of how the
biological circulatory system works how the neurological systems work, how the immunological is, how we develop, what the biochemistry of all that is.
Years and years of studying of that before you go, okay, now let me look at this very complex thing called the vaccine and how it affects the human being.
No.
We're just going to step on in and take a look at it and decide.
Yeah.
I never got that part.
I never got the hubris of the whole thing.
Why are you speaking out about this when you don't know shit about Shinola?
Aren't you slightly embarrassed to be throwing your hat in this ring that you have really
no...
That's why I make fun of the toxin thing.
To me, that's the funniest thing in the world.
Just draw the chemical formula of the toxin.
Just one of them.
Forget all the toxins.
Just draw the molecular structure for me.
I don't have to draw them, dude.
I feel them.
And then I'd like the stoichiometry.
Just write the chemical equation of how it does damage.
Forget the physiology.
Just the chemistry.
Just the basics.
And then how you're extracting that toxin. Just
write that down. Just the basic chemistry.
Nothing big. Just the
basics. Oh my god.
I know, Drew. Listen.
Here's the problem with knowing
things nowadays.
You get punished.
It's right up there with having money.
You get punished. It's literally like... It it's right up there with having money. You get punished.
Like it's literally like –
It's got that lack of trust thing that people just don't trust.
We talked about this in a previous show.
If you can't trust anything, even the facts, well, everything is relative then because you trust nothing and nobody.
Right.
And that's a terrible, terrible mistake.
Yeah.
Sad but true.
So did you see the – I think I – did I talk to you about this?
The Amazon Woody Allen series?
Did we talk about that?
I did what I always do with technology.
I went home.
Did we talk about it?
You talked about it.
Yes, we did.
And I went home and I was like, all right, I'm going to Amazon.
I think I got Netflix and like Amazon.
I don't watch anything.
The kids do.
Yeah.
They could show you how to do it.
I got home and I went, all right, here we go.
It always takes me a long time to navigate that stuff.
And then they do the punch it in and I punched in Woody Allen and then a thousand Woody Allen movies came up but I could
never find the documentary it's a crisis I'm sorry wait a second where were you oh the documentary I
wanted to go watch the documentary oh yes now I don't know if the Woody documentary is on Netflix
or Amazon as well Gary's gonna figure that out the the one I was talking about was the crisis
and six stories or something. Yes, I remember
that. That popped up,
but I wasn't as interested in watching
that as I was. No, the documentary
is assigned viewing for you.
The documentary, it looks like you're
probably going to have to rent. Pay for it.
Well, Amazon has a pay-per-view
thing, right? Yeah, you rent it.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, okay. That's what I'm saying. It's not going to
be part of his prime thing
I'm not good enough for that
to figure that out
no to pay $3.99
it's too good for me
this is worth it
let me see if I can't figure out a way to put it on a stick for you
oh no no
I don't want to put it like that
literally the way I'm wired
is I come across and it's like
would you like it for a two-day rental for $399?
And I go, I'm not worth the Subway six-inch sandwich.
That's the way I look at it.
I got the same thing.
I'll still buy a $5 million car.
I just don't have the, I'm not worth this.
It's weird.
It is weird, right?
It is.
But the, yes, that's a sign of you.
It will bring you great joy.
It will bring you great joy.
But the, I'm just curious about the Crisis in Six, how you see that.
Because I was generally positively sort of persuaded by it.
The reviewers didn't like it.
I'm just curious.
All right.
Well, I'll watch it.
And up next, we have episode 1153, released September 17th, 2019, titled,
They're Not Shitting on the Streets of Philly Yet?
The guys talk about the failings of the California public education system and their disdain for the politicians that would rather pander to unions than look for working solutions.
that would rather pander to unions than look for working solutions.
So back to the world that's being unraveled in California.
The thing that – Kevin Newsom is going to fix the schools there, buddy.
This is part of what we were talking about yesterday.
We come back and go, oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
How much more can we take?
I'll tell you.
I mean, do you have thoughts?
Finish your thought.
I got a bunch to talk about.
Every time I hear about this goddamn – when we're talking about schools, every time I hear about these charter schools and vouchers and like how well these charter schools are doing and how everyone's waiting in long lines to try to get their inner city kids like into these charter schools and blah, blah, blah.
And how guys like de Blasio made a statement.
He said, I hate charter schools like he wants them out.
It's like you guys do a horrible.
Obviously, you do a horrible job at education.
You guys do a horrible, obviously you do a horrible job at education.
I mean, the notion that your test scores are fucking through the floorboards for on every level and on every grade and that these poor fucking people who you claim to be a champion of the poor inner city kids are fighting for a chance to get out of it via a charter school and you've declared them devils. That's insane to me. That is insane. Well, look, you can go,
hey, charter schools, there's some things that don't work about them or they're not perfect
or they're not whatever or they're not whatever,
I'm not going to argue with you on any of it.
First off, when you're talking about inner city schools, Baltimore, Chicago,
LA Unified, what are we talking about?
What standard are we talking about?
I mean, we're talking staggering statistics in terms of 90 percentile,
can't do at grade math and stuff like that.
I mean, it's insane. So first things first, for everyone who's making an argument,
what what is our standard that we're arguing from? If you're arguing, if we were to give your schools that we speak of in these rough neighborhood, if we were in neighborhoods, if I was being generous, I would give them
a two out of 10.
Okay.
So all we have to do is get to three and we're doing better than your school.
Because your school, I mean, I'm rounding up to two.
And you're dead set against the other possibilities?
Oh, no, not on your watch.
Well, first off, why are people fucking waiting in line
and signing up and having lotteries,
and when they call the people's name in the auditorium,
the black mama falls to her knees and starts crying
because her kid got into the charter school?
Why are they doing that if they're so evil or they're not working or whatever?
But why are you dead set against a little healthy competition?
And do you feel this way about airlines?
I mean, are you this way with tennis shoes?
Are you this way at the food court?
No, it's all got to be hot dog on a stick.
Like that's, that's the way you work.
Your system's bad.
It's failing the people you claim to represent and you never stop pandering to.
Why not give these guys a shot?
How could it get worse?
how could it get worse and if you're dead set against it it's kind of making me wonder what your motivation is right as a politician what is your motivation what is guiding you what's
your motivation what do you intend you think these kids that are attending your dangerous
dirty rat infested inner city schools where they're not being educated. You think they're going to be harmed by going to this alternative of a,
of a school?
You think it could get,
is that what you're,
is that truly what,
that's what motivates you?
You're worried.
Impossible.
So the place you're sending them where they get no education,
you're worried that they're going to go somewhere else and get less than no
education or,
or,
or what,
what,
what exactly has does it work
there's enough data that has come in now that these schools outperform and again you don't
have to do much to outperform a super horrible inner city school yeah barely perform and you
shall outperform yeah they outperform so what are they dead set against them for? Why?
They're not unionized.
Oh, right.
That makes perfect sense now. You are in with the teachers' unions.
The teachers' unions vote you.
So the teachers' unions are now...
I thought it was some sort of fairness thing, but you're right.
It's the union.
The teachers' unions support your ass.
So you must then support the teachers unions.
These schools are scabs.
Part of the reason they get their teachers to perform is they can fire them.
They tell them, hey, you got to stay here till five o'clock at night.
And they go like, I'm going home early.
Like, OK, you're fired.
If you're underperforming in that environment, you can be fired and not protected by your union.
de Blasio is dug in with the unions.
So he has to get up there and talk about these schools being dangerous.
Of course, they're not dangerous.
What's dangerous is you're in the hip pocket of unions.
But you can't say that.
And also, fuck you very much, teachers in your unions.
Do you care about kids?
Why are you so against this thing?
If you reportedly care about kids, then why not this?
They can't come up with anything.
So fuck you.
And you're not heroes.
And this thing where you go, somebody said this the other day,
the greatest thing I ever heard, said, and think about it,
think about it in terms of like Al Sharpton or even teachers or teachers unions.
There's a quote.
I wrote it down.
Basically, it's this.
It starts as a movement.
It turns into a business, and then it turns into a racket.
Think about Al Sharpton.
Starts as a movement.
Turns into a business.
Now it's a fucking racket.
That's what happens with all these fucking unions and all these groups and all these.
If they start off as something like, hey, we got to get together.
We need safer environments.
We need to get together and organize.
And it all starts as that.
Then at a certain point, it's business.
It's a commerce.
Like, everyone pay.
We got 41,000 teachers.
They all pay dues.
You know, it's like, then next thing you know, we got to start voting.
You know, we got to take that money.
We got to throw it behind a candidate that's going to get us along or whatever.
Now it's a racket.
Now you're doing things to hurt kids.
Interesting.
Movement, business a racket. Now you're doing things to hurt kids. Interesting. Movement, business, racket.
Then what?
Then it falls apart, usually.
You know, whatever.
Southern Poverty Law Center.
You know, starts as a movement, then as a business, then it becomes a racket.
Now it eventually eats itself.
racket now eventually eats it itself so you know de blasio is against because what what normal reason would a guy like de blasio be against um charter schools he'd be the first guy for
charter that would be why wouldn't he want a charter school you would think he's he says he
hates them why does he hate them because they outperform his shitty schools
but everyone's safe
everyone's got a job
no one ever gets fired
because they got a union
what does that do by the way
no one can ever get fired
does that just bring out the best in all the teachers
is that how it works
I don't get why these people don't understand
what competition
is good for and why it works
oh well just
make it stop
suspending kids that tell
teachers to fuck off
okay you don't understand how that works
what that how should that
be what's that going to lead to
they're
so fucking dumb.
They're like, why aren't these kids doing well?
They don't have tablets.
Okay, well, give them tablets.
Does it ever work?
No.
That's the question I keep asking.
What's leading?
What philosophical frame are you using?
How do you make sense of this?
What do you intend?
Oh, there is no intent.
The philosophical, I mean, when you had,
who did you have Barbara Boxer on?
And she was laughing at me.
You got to do your homework or whatever.
First things first.
I've said this.
I don't know if I've said to you.
What if we just said this? What if we just said this. I don't know if I've said to you. What have we just said this?
What have we just said this?
What, Mark?
You like Trader Joe's?
Sure.
You like going to Sprouts?
You like going to Vons?
You like going to Whole Foods?
Unless the government's just going to take it over.
Yeah.
It's just one market, government market.
Could have all the same.
Could all be the same.
It's all be the same.
How do you think that would go?
You think you'd be delighted when you walked up and down the aisles of what is now the government-owned Trader Joe's?
Don't we like them duking it out for our business?
Now, the government has a role.
They can regulate and check the meat and check the sanitary conditions.
They can do a million different things. but let them duke it out.
Think about the markets.
They're shrines.
I mean, they're crazy.
It's only competition.
They're just doing better than they have to.
There's so much out there they they got to pull you in.
Right?
Yeah, absolutely.
Just close your eyes and imagine if the city of Los Angeles just took over the markets.
The supermarkets.
All of them.
Oh my God.
It would all look like the sidewalks. If the county, Los Angeles County said, we're now just taking over the Sprouts and the Irwan and the Gelson's and the Whole Foods and the Trader.
We know we're doing inequality in food distribution or whatever.
We're good at what we do.
We're taking it over.
You'd have to move.
You couldn't live in that.
Could you live in this town?
No.
Well, you know, they do a horrible job.
What makes them experts at education?
Nothing.
Okay.
We'll be right back with more of the Adam and Dr. Drew Show classics.
Last up for today, we have episode 879, released July 26, 2018, titled Pound Sand, Daddy.
Adam and Dr. Drew play a commercial for the 70s perfume Charlie by Revlon before they discuss organized sports and the positive impact they feel it can have on one's growth and development.
Drew.
I had Gary pull another Charlie ad for you.
Come on.
For me.
Come on.
For you. You'll like this another Charlie ad for you. Come on. For me. Come on. For you.
You'll like this one.
I love Charlie.
Because it was such a weird song that everyone would make fun of and talk about back in high
school, college even, right?
Well, I'm a little younger, so I don't know.
High school.
No, not high school.
Charlie, to me, was like junior high.
Okay.
It's high school for me.
Yeah. Do the math, goofball. Let's like junior high. Okay, it's high school for me. Yeah, do the math, goofball.
Let's hear this one.
Well, it's college also.
College?
Well, I remember coming up during medical school.
It was a college.
Yeah.
All right.
I remember coming up during medical school.
That's why.
Well, it hung around for five years.
There's a fragrance that's new today and they call it.
Chick's getting off a helicopter.
This is the first one, right? A whole fragrance that thinks new today and they call it Charlie. Chick's getting off a helicopter. This is the first one, right?
She was older.
Yeah, they call it Charlie.
Kind of young, kind of now.
Charlie.
Kind of free, kind of.
Wow.
Charlie.
Kind of fragrance that's going to stay and it's here now.
Charlie.
This is Smoky By Revlon
A most original fragrance
I love the fact that
You know, it's a commercial
It's 30 seconds long
With like 11 vignettes
One is her smoking
Because she's cool
She's liberated
Yeah
God, all I did when I was a kid
Was look at almost everything
And go, who?
What is this life?
You're running around.
You're getting off a helicopter.
You're eating at fabulous places.
You're playing backgammon with the elite.
But again, I would watch commercials for like the Super Bowl of motocross.
I'd go like, who?
Who's going to this?
How does this work it's weird when you're a kid
when you're a kid it doesn't take that much and this is why this is why i i'm uh not overly
concerned but i blab a lot about what we're doing you know the the thing about the kids like hey
they don't have the money they don't have access't have access. Stop saying there's a target on everyone's back and we live in a, you know, that there's systematic oppression and all that kind of stuff.
All it does is make kids just fucking quit.
Like, I was so close to quitting a thousand times.
Just look at these things.
Oh, fuck.
What goes on?
This could never work.
It'll never work, you know. these things. Oh, fuck. What goes on? This could never work. It'll never work.
Small things like just seeing a commercial for Sizzler and going like, oh, please, who could afford to eat there?
The kids are pretty easily just kind of turned off.
It's funny you bring that up because earlier in the week you mentioned something about –
Charlie.
You mentioned something about –
Charlie!
It wasn't about Charlie, but we had a caller talking about Ray and about deciding to do a certain kind of life.
And to what extent do you think we are able to choose our way out of things or find our way into what it is we want to be or do?
It's an unclear thing to me.
It's unclear.
I will tell you.
I mean, it's not a simple matter.
It's not an easy thing.
No, no, no.
People just go, well, you just choose to be a certain kind of life,
choose to be a certain kind of person.
How dare you?
How dare you?
How dare you?
It is simple, but it's not easy.
It's super simple. It's like Vinnie Tortorich come in here and go oh you want to lose 100 pounds we can lose 100 pounds and do it in six months now here's
this simple no more carbs no more sugar lots of exercise and you go all right so what time i'm
at 6 a.m tomorrow and we'll doing, we'll put on some miles.
We'll do some road work.
And then you go, and then we're doing some heavy lifting.
And you go, oh, it is simple.
It's super simple.
It's too fucking simple.
You know what I mean?
Go down to the beach and start running on the sand.
I don't know what gets, it doesn't get simpler, but it ain't easy.
Right.
But I'm thinking about like our kids and my kids
and finding their way and how you make a living.
You can't just will yourself into things.
You can work hard and you can have a sort of a direction
and keep your eye on the ball, but I don't know.
You know what I'm saying?
Nah.
I mean a little bit. I'll tell you. There to it you have and you and i have always talked about this
there there is managing yourself and your piece of it but also i know
truth's coming undone i choked on listen none of us are going to save you if something happens
we're not expecting it don't worry but uh But there's also the piece where you have to assess reality.
Yes.
And your place in reality.
And I would argue that's the harder part.
Well –
It's easy to kind of regulate yourself as compared to how do I perform in an environment?
What will the environment tolerate?
What's the environment need to be successful?
These kind of things.
These are very hard questions.
What will I be best at?
I'll tell you what your best chance is.
And this is what we're doing and we're losing.
You need discipline.
You need to beat yourself.
You need to master yourself.
You need to push through.
And those challenges were out there.
And they ain't out there anymore.
What do you mean?
My son plays football.
It's flag football.
The coaches are on the field.
They snap the ball.
Every kid runs a different direction,
and some guy with a noodle for an arm tries to throw him the ball,
and it doesn't even resemble football.
Why don't you go play gladiator football?
Well, I was explaining to my wife last night, like, look, you want to learn football,
there's something called football.
There's a snap count.
There's a break.
There's a huddle.
There's no coaches standing on the field, not at their age, and they're playing.
Go play gladiator football.
My kids do it when they were 10.
Well, go tell Sonny that because he doesn't – I don't think he wants to.
He wants to. He's right around the corner from you. But he doesn't. I don't think he wants to. He wants to.
He's right around the corner from you.
But he doesn't.
Take him down there and let him watch a practice.
See if he gets intrigued.
I love this thing where I'm supposed to be some sort of fucking shepherd, you know?
You have to expose him to pot roast.
See if he's intrigued.
What happened to us?
They never have to expose us to things.
Son, would you like a mini bike?
Pound sand, daddy.
Maybe if you just take them down and expose them to a mini bike.
If you want to do something, you fucking do something.
But that's interesting by itself, right?
Maybe there's too much stimulation.
Oh, there's too much.
Yeah, nobody cares.
Nobody cares about anything.
Oh, there's too much.
Yeah, nobody cares.
Yeah.
Nobody cares about anything.
But what I was trying to explain to Lynette the other night at dinner was there needs to be a discipline.
You got to be able to get out there in the heat and run some laps.
This sort of just everyone's on the field and nobody's really in charge and no one's really – everyone's eligible and no one's really running a play.
And it's just kind of – it's a clusterfuck.
And it literally – I'm having to explain to Lynette this is not football.
Like it doesn't resemble football.
You're calling it football and football games and football practice.
It is not – it's insulting to people that play football to call this football.
It's not.
It's just – first off, I have no idea why the coach stands on the field.
Take him down to the high school and watch a gladiator practice.
Just go do it.
Let me tell you how dead football is.
Oh, really?
I was getting chastised because I said, look, by the time he gets to high school, it's going to be too late to play football.
And Lynette looked at me and she said, they don't have a high school football team.
And I said, I thought everyone had a high school football team.
And she said, no, they don't.
And I was like, oh.
Seriously?
Well, here's where my comedy comes in. I get a little chastised for being checked out like come on you should really pay more attention to what's going on
there is no high school football team and you should know kind of you know if you're a little
bit better dad you'd be tuned in and whatever and i was like sorry but i just thought if you
had a high school you had a football team and And then I was like, nope. They got flag football, and then they got basketball, and they got baseball.
And I was like, Jesus, these are hard times.
And then, thank God, there's something called a computer.
Because I just typed in the high school, and it's like, oh, here's their varsity schedule for the football team.
They do have a football team.
But here's how bad it is.
Lynette and the moms don't even, doesn't exist. Don't acknowledge it. In her world, they don't have a team. But here's how bad it is. Lynette and the moms don't even, doesn't exist.
Don't acknowledge it. In her world,
they don't have a team. That's how
little it's discussed.
Kids need to get back
to it, Drew.
They need to get back to chores and
milking and churning.
I told you, I was talking to my son about
overcoming adversity and he said, you know,
going from being sort of a crappy football player to anchoring an offensive line by the time he was a senior was a major piece of his development.
What are you smirking about?
No, and Matt finally was telling me the same thing.
He went from just overcoming life's diversities to just being an anchor in general.
No specific sport or offensive line, just a general life anchor.
Just an anchor.
Just being an anchor.
Yeah.
He thought of it being an anvil, but he became an anchor.
He became an anchor.
Nice.
That's right.
He was going to go ball and chain, but he thought that had a kind of feminine reference to it.
You know what?
That's racist.
It's racist.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yes. Anvil, a little outdated. reference to it. You know what? That's racist. It's racist. Oh, yeah. Oh, yes.
Anvil, a little outdated.
Mm-hmm.
But Anchor.
Anchor?
Mm-hmm.
That's solid.
That's all for this week.
Thanks for listening to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics.
Remember to check back each week for new episodes.
And while you're at it, don't forget to like, subscribe, and rate us five stars
wherever you get your favorite podcasts.