THE ADAM BUXTON PODCAST - EP.216 - JOE LYCETT

Episode Date: December 5, 2023

Adam talks with British comedian, presenter, artist, political mischief maker and returning friend of the podcast, Joe Lycett about his ideas for the live podcast shows, Pranktivism, social media, whether BBC balance should extend to Thanos from Avengers Infinity War, Werner Herzog's views on therapy, more on the mopping debate, and Joe's evolution as a fine artist. This conversation was recorded face-to-face in London on November 7th, 2023The dictaphone joke before the outro was told by Bill, the sound person on Travel Man.THIS EPISODE CONTAINS HUMOUR SOME MAY FIND OFFENSIVE!Thanks to Séamus Murphy-Mitchell for production support and conversation editing.Podcast artwork by Helen GreenADAM BUXTON PODCAST LIVE @ LONDON PALLADIUM, Tuesday 19th March, 2024RELATED LINKSJOE LYCETT OFFICIAL WEBSITEJOE LYCETT ON INSTAGRAMDAVID BECKHAM BREAKS SILENCE OVER JOE LYCETT'S MONEY SHREDDING STUNT - 2022 (SKY NEWS)MR BINGO WEBSITETEARDOWN GAME SITETHIS MACHINE DESTROYS EVERYTHING - (YOUTUBE)SATISFYING CARPET CLEANING - (YOUTUBE)THE EDGE OF EVERYTHING (RONNIE O'SULLIVAN DOCUMENTARY) OFFICIAL TRAILER - 2023 (YOUTUBE) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I added one more podcast to the giant podcast bin Now you have plucked that podcast out and started listening I took my microphone and found some human folk Then I recorded all the noises while we spoke My name is Adam Buxton, I'm a man I want you to enjoy this, that's the plan. Hey, how you doing listeners? It's Adam Buxton here.

Reporting to you from a non-clement farm track in Norfolk, UK. East of England, towards the beginning of December 2023. Weather-wise, it's disgusting out here. No disrespect to the mighty weather gods. Why would I disrespect them? I don't want to get in a fight with the weather gods. Weather gods saying, look, we were at COP24. Don't put this all on us. All right, weather gods. I was just having a moan.

But it is too cold for dog legs. I'll tell you that much. She's back at home. On the sofa. Nice and warm. Thank you. Actually, it's not even as bad as it was yesterday. Over the last few days,

it's been in the minuses. It's a cold snap. Just at this moment, it's not raining, but it has been raining relentlessly, so it's just as cold as the rain can possibly get before turning into sleet or snow, plus wind. Oh, OK, here's the rain. It's started now. How are you doing, though, listeners? I went in hard with the weather chat this morning. I hope you're doing all right. Not too stressed out.

I'm all right. Got the tree yesterday. Keeping it minimal, decoration-wise, this year. Just the red cherry lights and the white fairy lights. It used to be that my wife and whichever children were interested would festoon the tree with ball balls.

But last year they said, no, let's keep it minimal. Don't know if they just couldn't be bothered or what. Anyway, now it's minimal. The don't know if they just couldn't be bothered or what. Anyway, now it's minimal the way I like it, but there is a bit of me that is a little sad that they're not so excited to festoon the tree with ball balls. Oh, it's so cold. All right, come on, let's jazz this intro up. so cold. All right, come on, let's jazz this intro up. Right now, let me tell you a bit about podcast number 216, which features a rambling conversation with British comedian, presenter, artist, political mischief maker, and returning friend of the podcast, Joe Lysett. Lysett facts!

Lysett. Lysett facts! Joe Harry Lysett was born in 1988 in Hall Green, Birmingham. He attended the University of Manchester, where he studied English and drama. Joe began doing stand-up around about 2009, but within a year was enjoying the delicious taste of the sweet biscuit of success, was enjoying the delicious taste of the sweet biscuit of success, having won a raft of prestigious awards. For Joe, the next decade passed in a blur of appearances on bigger and bigger TV shows. You know the ones, live at the Apollo, the Taskmaster, the Nevermind, the Buzzcocks, the 8 Out of 10 Cats, the QI, in between stand-up tours in larger and larger venues.

This is a very broad strokes bio here. By the end of the 2010s, Joe was living the UK comedian's dream, having landed regular hosting jobs on TV shows, the great British sewing bee being announced as Richard Ayoade's successor on comedy travel show Travelman, and being given his own Channel 4 show, Joe Lysitz Got Your Back, in which he and co-presenters Mark Silcox, Sophie Duker and Rosie Jones investigated consumer issues raised by viewers and set out to resolve them with the aid of humour and pranks. Oh, the wind is bitey.

The show, Joe Lycett's Got Your Back, which ran for three series, was, according to Joe, intended to be a sexy watchdog. Like Rosie. And it gave Joe an opportunity to express his talent for a kind of mischievous comedic activism that in recent years has become more central to his output. On the 4th of September 2022, Joe was invited to be a panellist

on the very first of a new BBC One current affairs programme, Sunday with Laura Kunzberg. As well as Joe, politician Liz Truss was appearing on the programme. She won the Conservative leadership election the next day. But Laura Kunesberg and fellow panellists were surprised when Joe declared himself not only, quote, very right wing, but also a big fan of Liz Truss. The programme caused consternation among some higher-ups at the BBC, who felt that having a guest saying the opposite of what they meant on a serious political programme constituted a debacle of the highest order. A few months later, Joe was in the news

again, this time for pretending to shred £10,000 in protest over David Beckham's lucrative deal to promote the World Cup in Qatar, despite that country's oppressive position on LGBTQ rights. In fact, Joe had not shredded the money. If you want the inside story on the whole David Beckham money-shredding protest, I would recommend listening to richard herring's podcast where he talks to joe which came out earlier this year 2023 anyway joe had not shredded the money he instead donated the full sum to lgbtq plus charities. According to the Sky News website, both Lysette's original money-shredding stunt

and his admission that the whole thing was a hoax divided opinion, with some labelling him attention-seeking, while others hailed him as a hero. 2023 saw the debut on Channel 4 of Joe's new comedy chat show, Late Night Lysette. The shows featured an artfully chaotic mix of celebrity guests, games and prank-slash-sketch pieces,

all broadcast live from a Birmingham canal-side studio decorated with Joe's trademark colourful flamboyance. It's an aesthetic that I would characterise as part David Hockney and part five-year-old child's drawing. My conversation with Joe was recorded at the beginning of November of this year, and we talked about, among other things, Joe's pranktivism,

whether X, formerly known as Twitter, is a real place, whether the BBC would get Thanos from Avengers Infinity War on for the sake of balance. Joe told me about the brief police investigation into one of his tasteless jokes. We spoke about Werner Herzog's views on therapy. And we talked about Joe's evolution as a fine artist. You seen his art? That's fine. I'm joking.

He is one of the finest of the artists. But we began by talking about why I took a break from the podcast in the first half of this year and how Joe is going to help take my live shows to the next level i'll be back at the end for a bit more waffle but right now with joe lysett here we go ramble chat let's have a ramble chat we'll focus first on this, then concentrate on that Come on, let's chew the fat and have a ramble chat Put on your conversation coat and find your talking hat I notice you've not been putting out episodes as frequently recently. I took a break earlier this year for the first half of the year, hoping that I would make some headway with another book.

Ah. And also an album, my first album of musical songs. Oh, wow. I have made some headway with the album. It's nearly there. Oh, great. That's not to say it's going to be out anytime soon. No.

But it's very nearly there after quite a long period of agonizing over what should be in it and what kind of thing it should be i do think this is a problem of work generated by you as a solo individual yeah i take sort of sporadic bits of time out here and there over the year most of the time and I think to myself oh I've got a week there by the end of that week I'll have a full novel seven scripts for short films 18 paintings and a BAFTA and by the end of it I've had a lot of really nice lingering boozy lunches and naps and I don't produce because there's no deadline and none of it matters ultimately. But that is the joy of it and also the peril of it.

What are some of your greatest unproduced masterpieces, concepts, ideas for shows, artworks, et cetera? The Adam Buxton O2 podcast for a start. Remind us how that works. So, you know know following in the footsteps of the great podcasters like chris ramsey and his wife which one do they do they do ask shag marry kill avoid shag and kill i think they shag and kill each other each episode i think is what happens and then they shagged and killed each other live on stage yeah I think at the O2 or at Wembley. And then Josh and Rob did their Parenting Hell podcast live on stage as well.

Big venues. Arenas. Then there's the... They changed the game. I'm trying to remember what they're called now. They keep talking about how they keep changing the game. And I always think, I can't keep track of the game. Have a word pod yes former guest michelle

de swart oh of course yes michelle yes i have a word podcast and i did listen to it and i thought to myself i don't think this is my speed i feel like i'm too old and not sufficiently manly yeah i would agree with that analysis actually on both of those fronts anyway so podcasts have arena previous yeah but you are one of the ogs i would say you might be the goat are you the goat oh yeah well let's say yes i mean the goat i think you going to have to say it's... That guy's not a goat. I'm so sorry. I just had a lunch. Is that your bowls?

I actually do sound like that when I'm doing my fast. Yeah, mine do as well. They go on for ages. I have to wait for my wife to get out of bed in the morning. And when she goes through into the bathroom, I lie on my front. And that's what it sounds like. Oh. And when she goes through into the bathroom, I lie on my front.

And that's what it sounds like. I'd like to rub your belly while that's happening. And feel like I'm part of it. Anytime. Yeah. Let me know. Let me know. I'll pop round.

So the podcast, the Adam Buxton O2 podcast, which I came up with when i think we were together doing travel man maybe yeah uh and it stuck with me and i still believe is the perfect way of doing your podcast within a live environment is that you go into via some sort of underground tunnel or something. So you don't interact at any point with your audience. You don't see anyone. But essentially, once you're in the booth, which I imagine to be in the middle of the O2 and lit incredibly well. So it's in the round. Yeah, but it's so soundproof.

You don't hear the 15,000 people of the o2 applauding and excited and all that i think maybe well you should have a guest because you have a guest every time but i think there should be an opening there rosie's there yeah you walk rosie up there she doesn't know what's going on she does a shit in the corner of the glass box there's a thought so it's glass so people can see through so in my head it was filmed but actually i hadn't thought it's like a two-way glass so you can't see out i can't see out they can see in what about that yeah yeah yeah perfect great i think you'd enjoy it but it definitely doesn't fit with your vibe to do an arena it feels very commercial and very It feels very commercial and very successful in a way that you refuse to accept.

Refuse to countenance. It would be a different level of energy, obviously. But that's why I think it would be very cool. It'd be a very cool way to do it where you accept your, the success of this podcast is the opposite of that well it's i mean it's there's a bigness to it but it's not no it's intimate it's not the have a word pod no i feel leaning into that but within a big space so you're acknowledging the success of the thing and the fact that you are the goat but doing it in a way that maintains you know the smallness of this and the intimacy of this could be very interesting so that's a project i really want to go for yeah and then you could do it and then what about any of your other projects are there things though have you started time to

think about anything but the box but the box box. The box, Adam Buxton box. Did you ever start writing a film or anything like that? Yeah, so I'm currently in pre-production for my next short film, which we're going to film in a few weeks, actually. It takes ages to get to the point of pre-production, and then once you're in, you're kind of going for it. And it's the most involved I've done, but previous ones haven't been that involved they've been sort of two location based whereas this one's just a few more locations

and involves a bit more kind of camera work and a bit more logistics of how things will actually work on shoot days just have to be a bit more efficient about things but i'm really enjoying that and i'm trying to do one short a year to build up my skill in that in that field how long is the short film going to be last one was eight minutes i think this one will probably end up more in the 15 region but yeah we're talking the thing is that all films should be that length anything over 90 minutes i think what are you doing i agree with you and i want to find those people and make them stop. Just the idea of anything over two hours is so...

How have we got here? How is that the standard now that every Hollywood film is that long? Well, I mean, I'm going to blame the internet, first of all. In streaming terms, longer is better because it keeps people on the platform on the platform yeah in cinema terms it used to be the opposite like you would want a short film because you could play that twice three times in a night yeah in a day and then now you've got you know if you've got a the new martin scorsese joint you're lucky if you can play that once a day. Yeah. People come back and watch part two tomorrow. Because what is it, like, nearly four hours, the new Martin Scorsese?

I think so. It's definitely over three, isn't it? Yeah. And I'm sure, you know, I'm sure it's Triff. But I bet you there's a few bits that could come out. Hundy P. Yeah. I feel like that. I few bits that could come out. Hundy P. Yeah. I feel like that.

I saw Jerusalem in the West End. I can't remember which theatre it was. This is the play, the live play. The play. And it's in three acts and there's two intervals. It's like a kind of mini interval. And I watched it and I loved it. And it was, the performances were brilliant.

And I get why people said this is excellent. But I watched it and i thought i could have edited that i could i could have put you don't need that second mini interval i could have done it for you it wouldn't take me long yeah there's a few things in there i just think that's exposition that doesn't need to be there we don't need to know that about that character do you think that there is anything that they're trying to do with the length that affects the kind of mood of the audience is there some way in which the director is deliberately trying to induce an altered state oh that you might call boredom they must they must have

justified it to themselves like i remember going to see that quentin tarantino double bill what was it called grindhouse and death something death and it was like his tribute to the grindhouse uh sort of horror genre and in the second one death proof i think it was called and it was about like the first hour at least was they were just in a calf in a roadside calf having a chat somewhere out in america and then it turns into a big long car chase for the last section of the film you know this is after you've watched a whole other film that is part of this bigger creation. You know, the whole thing is supposed to be watched as a package. Yeah.

A film, then some made-up trailers, then another film. Yeah. And the whole first hour of the second film that you're watching is just in the CAF. And I was so bored. Yeah. I was dying. I was in pain. Then you start this car chase thing and the car chase is suddenly incredibly exciting yeah because the contrast to the state you've been in for the

previous hour at least right is so extreme i was just kind of jangling it was like i'd just been shot full of adrenaline that's interesting so you think that it might be a deliberate well he's a film geek isn't he yeah so he there's a lot of hidden references and pastiches of things i believe so and i uh i admire that because i would never do that in anything i do I deliberately try and not watch stand-up when I'm coming with new stand-up because I'm scared of the influence of other things so film is the same I could sit and watch film you should watch Dave Gorman he's really good he does a lot of the same things that you do that's what people say to me they say oh yeah you do that presentation you should watch dave gorman he's got a laptop yeah yeah i'm sure he does lots of things that i do probably a lot better but

that's why i don't want to watch him yeah he's legit an influence of mine actually because i watched some of his stuff when i was at uni no every time i have accidentally strayed across his stuff it's made me angry because i thought a bugger he's doing what i do but way better no no no he's doing it differently yeah i'm doing it better than both of you at least from a commercial perspective but what neither of us are doing actually i can't speak for dave gorman but what i'm not doing is raising 50 000 pounds for the homeless which you've just been doing the last couple of days right it sounds so um like you're uh noel edmonds yeah he's not a good example of someone who raises money i mean i'll take it i'm the new noel edmonds fine lovely um no you're the

new um i'm also sure that dave gorman's raised a lot of money for charity. I'm sure he has. I said, you know, I can't speak for him. I'm sure you have. We're all very charitable. We're all very charitable. Very nice people. Yeah. Yeah, that is more, and I realised it today when I was searching my own name on Google,

where I thought, actually, this has become a vanity project now. So explain what has happened. We are talking, today is Tuesday, the 7th of november 2023 um our suella braverman who is currently the home secretary is i've not met her and i don't know everything about her but my prediction is not a good person and she said in a tweet supposedly it's the king's speech today i don't know if it went into the king's speech supposedly was going to go into it about how one of the things they're going to crack down on is the scourge of homelessness and people sleeping in tents they're not fussed about

people outside of tents that's fine but people putting tents up on roadsides sort of looks bad or whatever so they want to get rid of them and she described homelessness as a lifestyle choice that is her exact words lifestyle choice but i did think that a lifestyle choice was things like i i suspect you might be wearing them what is it that you're wearing it's a short of some sort is it it's like a hiking short yeah that's a lifestyle choice north face that is a north face hiking short is a lifestyle choice yes um we're both dripping with lifestyle choices i've got a jumper on of my own artwork yeah it's good man uh i'm also i like your hair lifestyle choice got my hair bleach blonde as an experiment it's good man it's a lifestyle choice and i also said i'm looking now

my eyes are darting around the room to see if you've got anything i don't think you do potpourri i thought was a lifestyle choice i have some potpourri do you i have some well it's kind of like potpourri it's this incredibly pungent stuff that we got in morocco ah yeah and it's uh you can sort of give it a sniff and it clears out all the sinuses and all the passages in about two seconds well i'll have a little go on that maybe post record or maybe during record if you think it would be a good listen um so what i said was i feel like potpourri is a lifestyle choice let's see if this bowl of potpourri a picture of this bowl of potpourri that i found on google which i posted to instagram with you can link it to a fundraising thing can raise 50 grand for crisis and um

it did it in three days which it has and i think we're now up to 60 grand um which i thought was really ambitious but let's have a go and to do it in three days has been very exciting but also shows i think the sentiment at least from my followers and the people that kind of are in my sphere how they feel about that sort of thing so i'm all it in elite the metropolitan media um uh powerful elite yeah but yes i was drunk on a train and came up with that idea uh with my friend lucy and we sort of came up with that what what's the most sort of lifestyle choicey thing and we were thrashing out different lifestyle choices and we're talking about it and potpourri was the thing we landed on as the as the thing and then obviously once you drop something like that then a bit of ego clicks in and you go well if we don't raise 50 grand i look like a prick now yeah then you have to start

supplementing it from your income yeah and i was that's the last thing you want to do well exactly and i have spent far too much on these homeless pricks. So I did start to get a little bit invested personally as me as a human and thinking. So it became less about what I care about in terms of homelessness or whatever and more about protecting my own ego, which I think happens a lot when you you know charity sort of stuff that's i think very common across any sort of charitable thing is that there's a little bit of is it fully altruistic or is the sort of a sense of being seen to do the right thing um sure but i think at the end of the day i toy with this a lot anyway because i sort of think i get a lot of praise off the back of loads of things i do like that

yeah all your virtue signaling my virtue signaling work and i do go am i just doing it for that and actually if i could get away with not doing that i don't know i'm interested in that as motivation i suppose and then i noticed a comment on your instagram page in amongst all the people congratulating you and saying how what a nice guy i am yeah saying you're great all that stuff yeah when are you going to run for office another comment that said please speak out about Palestine Joe yeah yeah there's a lot of that obviously listeners in case there's anyone daft listening I don't suppose there is I don't think I have any daft listeners. Obviously, I'm not laughing in any way at anything to do with the situation in the Middle East.

But I suppose I'm laughing at the idea that anyone would think it was a good idea to just... I tell you what would be great is to add another opinion to all the incredibly helpful opinions there are swimming around on social media when it comes to the middle east and ideally tack it on to a post about a bowl of potpourri yeah that's the best platform for that i would say i was watching a youtube essay yesterday and the person on there was talking about when dave chappelle said i don't give a fuck about twitter because twitter isn't a real place he was talking about the criticism that he got after one of his specials yeah and he said uh yeah i don't care what people are saying on twitter because twitter is not a real place and this person in the youtube essay i was watching she was outraged by it um i haven't really thought through what i'm trying to say to you at this point i've just And this person in the YouTube essay I was watching, she was outraged by it.

I haven't really thought through what I'm trying to say to you at this point. I've just realized as I was speaking, this is only a half-formed thought. But I thought I'd float it and see where it went. We might jump off the thought quite soon because it's sinking. I'm excited. A bit horny. Are you? Yeah. thinking but i'm excited a bit horny yeah so you're sat on the side of the thought and you're kind of surreptitiously nudging your

trousers down meanwhile i'm standing on the edge of the thought and i'm a bit pissed and i'm going all right so i was watching this youtube essay yeah and she was saying that she was outraged by the idea that chappelle could be so entitled and privileged as to suggest that twitter was not a real place she said i understand what he means but like it or not it is a real place and social media is where the bulk of important public discourse takes place nowadays it's the town square it's the town square well she was all it was slightly confusing the youtube essay i found maybe i was a little worse for wear but um i've never had any sort of edifying conversation in a town square

have you not we had a good conversation in prague town square wasn't edifying okay anyway i just thought i don't buy the idea that um that all important dialogue now takes place in social media and and that it's become a valuable i mean you know she had a lot of criticisms about social media herself but she was sort of saying whether you like it or not this is where all important conversations happen i mean i don't think that's supported by the actual numbers at this point anyway like the majority of people are not on twitter x yeah but I don't know. X formally Twitter is what we have to call it now.

How long is that going to go on for? Oh, God. Yeah. So how are you feeling on my half-formed conversational iceberg? I think I generally agree with you. I think that the problem with social media is that the numbers start to skew your perception of the thing. is that the numbers start to skew your perception of the thing. And you can start to see a retweet as a form of endorsement,

which it so often isn't. And I think a lot of conversations happen outside of it that have influence. And I imagine for a lot of the discussions going on in very high profile very high powered things as well that twitter is you know who cares you know that so well as probably not making her policy decisions by you know testing them on x i think she probably has decided that she's doing it well before it's then announced on x amongst high-powered people within the cabinet, whatever. So I think I agree. I suppose you could argue that social media plays a large part in setting an agenda, at least for the kind of conversations that people are having.

But yeah, I really doubt that the useful part of the conversation is happening on social media. It just seems evident that it isn't because it's so counterproductive it's so it's i'm trying to avoid using the word toxic but i mean is it's binary in such an unhelpful way if you in any way start wavering from one point of view that seems to be the right one on a subject and going yeah bark then it's like oh my god you're equivocating you're worse than the people on the other side you know what i mean like i don't see it as a binary actually i sort of see it as a polyery whatever that is because essentially all opinions are there particularly on big big issues. If you scroll through, there'll be someone saying they're pro it, they're anti it.

And then there'll be someone saying the question shouldn't even be asked. And then there's someone saying I'm somewhere in the middle and everything in between. So I say all this having not been on social media since the beginning of 2020. So I can stick it right up my stupid middle aged arse. Yeah, exactly. And you're pushing the conversation with your goat, very successful podcast. That's right.

Which has nothing to do with social media. So I am inclined to feel that it is part of the discourse, but it is very much not the discourse. It plays a role. And it definitely pushes stuff up. I mean, I'm interested to know how you know about the potpourri thing. I suppose you did research on me before I got here, but the potpourri thing was entirely social media driven.

Yeah, I wouldn't have known about that, but I did put your name into Google, and that's the first thing that came up. And I thought, oh, blimey. He's always doing something. Yeah. But that's the thing. It was one post drunkenly on a train that has now spiralled into something.

So it often is that. It's just something that's one silly idea that suddenly spirals and people get behind. It's great, man. And I think that it's really good that you remain engaged in that way and that you're not ground down by some of the problems with it and some of the complicated responses to it your heart is always in the right place as far as i can see and you're not someone who is trying to score points with people that don't agree with you in that way which is one of the things that i do see happening on social

media it's i mean i am scoring point i mean i i i try and be diplomatic about a lot of it but i have i've lost and entirely lost patience with the government and don't respect them and want reared i don't know what my ideal alternative looks like i have absolutely no idea actually but the government, in a way that I refrained from my entire career talking about politics and telling people how to vote, whatever. I'm really struggling to not constantly tell people we've got to get rid of these inept, callous people. But I think we should keep them for the sake of balance. Yeah. I'm pushing back against Joe. I think they're doing a terrific job.

I was talking about this yesterday that the BBC balance thing, when you, if you actually implement that, they should have someone pro the death of children on children in need. And I would happily do that. I might pitch that to the BBC, say say i feel this is an unbalanced program i've contacted offcom and actually nobody's talking about the value of the death of children oh my god there's probably some people who think that well there are of course there are

because there's people that think all all things all there are of course there are because there's people that think all things all sorts of things but that's that's where the balance thing goes wrong isn't it because emily make this put this a lot more astutely than i could ever but it's an illusion of balance and it's an illusion of seeing a cross-section of viewpoints because most people agree that killing kids or kids dying is a bad thing yeah i mean that's a very extreme example and of course i mean i think we can agree most human beings who who aren't committed to nihilism yes can agree that it is a bad thing and that there's nothing really to be gained from entertaining the alternative no but obviously

most political conversations aren't like that and there are elements of value to opposing points of view on most things i remember having a conversation with an old school friend actually of of mine and we were talking about cancer and we're talking about curing of cancer and i just took it as a given that that would be a good thing if we cured cancer i think it's probably i didn't even think about it and he then presented the problems that that would create if you start to have the a vast amount of people surviving beyond when they have thus far and the pressures that were put elsewhere and he was a bit more nuanced about he said obviously the suffering of cancer is a terrible thing but if people live forever that creates all sorts of problems and I then started

to go oh god like it's everything's so complicated when you really kind of there's no the good and bad is really hard to nail down ultimately um but that's a bit like a bit of a spiral yeah of going like maybe we should all just have cancer that's like thanos in uh avengers infinity war he he's the big baddie and uh And once he assembles his infinity stones and makes the special glove. Have you seen the film? No. It sounds really grown up. It's dealing with some pretty heavy themes. He gets his glove.

The magic glove. He gets his magic glove. And he clicks his fingers and half the people in the world. Maybe it's even half the living creatures. It might even include all the animals and stuff vanish. Yeah. And so obviously everyone's against Thanos cause they don't want half the living creatures in the universe to vanish.

But Thanos says, actually guys, the reason I'm doing it is because ultimately it's going to be good for everybody because we're going to have more resources. At the moment, there's too many living creatures. And it's a little bit like your mate saying, people are living too long. Yeah, sure.

I mean, it does become complicated. If you click your fingers and get rid of half the living creatures in the universe, then yes, there is more space to go around and you can pay yourself more wages and there's more mangoes and all that kind of thing. But on the downside, you just got rid of half the living creatures in the world that everyone cares about. Also, in the modern world, if Thanos was to get their glove together, then it would be a disaster, not least because we rely on each other so much yeah you know it's a it's a weird thing that in a world where we are increasingly separated from each other by technology and we

are very individualistic in lots of ways actually we are reliant on each other more than we ever have been for services and for all the technology that needs to be maintained. Is this all sex? Is that how you refer to it? For services and technology that needs to be maintained? Yeah, for my special rub downs. Yeah, with the magic glove. With the magic glove.

You have to be careful when using the magic glove. That's a different magic glove. Oh, I've taken another half of the population out. When he assembles the sexy stones. That's for Friday nights. But yeah, it's a big philosophical conversation. Yeah. But I think on the whole, what are you going to do? It's a bit bleak to just say, nah, let's not treat cancer anymore. Let's not look into any, let's just let nature take its course i mean i suppose there are but i think that's what my friend was saying i think my friend was saying it's not as simple as it would be good to cure cancer i think he was saying what does that

actually mean and have we thought that through and what how would that look could we sustain that would that cause other problems elsewhere okay he wasn't like no i don't donate to uh stand up for cancer because i think exactly yeah no it wasn't that it was more i don't know just presenting the alternative yeah um as a thought experiment yes uh and i suppose we were talking about the idea of balance and bbc balance and that we're not on the bbc currently so we can talk about that but i wouldn't want to see on the bbc a and that we're not on the bbc currently so we can talk about that but i wouldn't want to see on the bbc a big discussion about how bad it would be to cure cancer because it's a niche bit of philosophical conversation essentially and i think what can happen at the

bbc is and i think they're getting a lot better at it but i think why they've lost people like emily make this uh a lot of the journalists is that they spend a lot of time seeing the other side needlessly yes when having that conversation which we had in a wine bar that could have just happened in a wine bar and not on news night essentially they should just get thanos on or get thanos on if thanos was just hired by the the BBC, he could deal with all of that stuff. And then everyone would see his big ridged purple face and go, ah, that's just Thanos.

So that's classic Thanos. Um, all right. Loose ends. Do we have any loose ends to tie up from that first convo chunk? Fucking out. I don't, I mean,

yeah. We're halfway through the podcast. I think it's going really great. The conversation's flowing like it would between a geezer and his mate. All right, mate. Hello, geezer. I'm pleased to see you. There's so much chemistry.

It's like a science lab of talking. I'm interested in what you said. Thank you. There's fun chat and It's like a science lab of talking I'm interested in what you said Thank you There's fun chat and there's deep chat It's like Chris Evans is meeting Stephen Hawking I was going to ask you What was the donkey joke? The donkey joke? Oh! So this was the gag that was in my stand-up

show that inspired a short police investigation when a police officer an off-duty police officer came to the show in belfast saw this and then basically said that i'd committed a crime i'm gonna see if i can find it i'm sure i've got. The premise is, and I do think it's the funniest thing I've produced, it's a visual gag in which I talk about how I'm camp, but I've always been camp since I was a little boy. And I found this old footage of me as a little boy, and I'm very camp in it, and I wanted to show that to the audience. But unfortunately, I'm naked in it and i'm about i know five or six and i asked a lawyer if it was possible to show this footage to an audience and they said that it was not possible because you can't show a child's penis in your show and i said but it's

my penis and i don't mind and they said it doesn't matter you just can't show it and so i said can you show an adult's penis and he said yes so i paid an animator to put a pixelated giant adult penis onto my child's body and this is the resulting footage which i'd be interested to know how you feel about so yes i don't know what age i am there but so this So this is young Joe dancing around in the front room, wearing a little pair of red pants, and then he pulls his pants down. And there's a huge grape wanger there. Was that your mum sitting on the sofa? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So he's sort of dancing around innocently with his grape big knob swinging around. Yeah, yeah. And so the cop said, actually, I think that's illegal. Yes. So what happened is I found that obviously very funny. And they said, oh, we need to see. We're going to come to the show tonight.

I had a show. It wasn't in Belfast. It was in Derry. And they said, oh, we're going to come to the show in Derry. And I said, oh, great, can I film you watching the footage? And they went quiet and they said, oh, no, if you could just send us the footage, we'll just go over it internally.

So I sat over lunch in Belfast waiting for this, I think it was a detective to go through it. And he eventually came back and said that no crime had been committed and um have a good day essentially by the way i didn't ever speak to a lawyer about this and i'm fairly sure it would have been fine okay so it's a construct in order to i just i had i thought it would be funny to put i can't remember why but it came into my head but i just thought it'd be funny to put an adult's penis onto my child's body i just thought that would be funny well you're cancelled yeah there it is um i've just had a text from alan

davies because i before i saw you i was with alan davies, went for lunch. It's a very sort of show-busy day for me, actually. Yeah, I love it. And I had four glasses of Sancerre and he had four glasses of Prosecco. And he's just messaged me to say, not sure how you managed to do Adam Button's thing. I'm feeling responsible. Good to see you. He's drunk out of his mind.

Adam Button. Adam Button. Adam Button Adam Button right let's go again what don't you fucking understand kick your fucking ass let's go again

what the fuck is it with you I want you off the fucking set you prick no you're a nice guy the fuck

are you doing no don't shut me up no no like this No! You're a nice guy. The fuck are you doing? No! Don't shut me up. No! No! Ah, da-da-da-da, like this. No!

No! Don't shut me up. Ah, da-da-da-da, like this. Fuck's sake, man, you're amateur. Seriously, man, you and me, we're fucking done professionally. I've been immersing myself in the world of Werner Herzog recently. Oh, yeah. Because I started reading his book, his memoir.

Every man for himself and God against all. It's called. You do a very good impression of him. It's not that hard to do a Werner Herzog impression. You just have to, you go all raspy and then you do an Arnold Schwarzenegger impression. I'll be back. Anyway, it turns out that I kind of am fascinated by Werner Herzog.

He was always a figure that was floating around in the periphery of my, you know, cinematic vision. I don't think I'd ever actually seen. No, I've seen a few of his documentaries i saw grizzly man and the volcano one and i see i think i saw one many many years ago and i know when you do the voice it's very recognizable to me and i've definitely seen some stuff and i sort of see him as a sort of power not parallel but in a similar category as adam curtis or something like that sort of very auteured documentarian but i couldn't tell you i haven't seen grizzly man so i couldn't tell you like what entirely he does but he just seems like a cool guy he's a very interesting guy

and you know magnetic i suppose because he's got this quite strong personality. He's now in his 80s. He was a darling of the German film scene in the 70s of new German cinema. Yeah. He made a few films with Kinski, Aguirre, Wrath of God, and Wojcik, and Nosferatu. I have seen something.

I just don't know what I've seen. Cobra Verde. And he's done lots of really interesting documentaries. Famously, he got shot during an interview with Mark Kermode out in Los Angeles. Someone was using an air rifle and an air rifle pellet hit him in the stomach. Wow.

And he said, It's not significant parker mode is going oh my god someone shot you we've got to take you to hospital no it's not significant because do you want to phone the police and then spend the rest of the night in the police station filling out forms. I don't want that. So I think we should ignore it. Anyway, one of the things, one of the interesting things that Werner Herzog talks about in his book

is his disdain for therapy. Psychoanalysis, in his opinion, is responsible for most of the bad things in the 20th century wow most evil century according to verner but obviously that is so counter to i think the modern conversation about mental health and the prevalence of people being comfortable with the idea of therapy and things like that when When did he say that he thought? I think he's always said it, but he restated it as part of this autobiography. And his line on it is that he says, if the rooms of the mind are overlit,

I'm obviously paraphrasing here, then they become uninhabitable. I.e. it's not good to be too introspective you should just leave some things alone because the danger obviously is that you tip over into self-regard forms of narcissism over analyzing overthinking so you know like almost everything in the world i'm conflicted because i do think like yeah i know what he means, it's a bit of imagery, isn't it, really? Because, you know, I could argue, yeah, you don't want the lights on in all of the rooms in the house, but you would like the room to be tidy when you go in. So by all means, be frugal.

Get some Phillips Hue bulbs. You can choose exactly how light or dark you want each room but ideally try if you go into a room to leave it as you found it and if it's in a real state just dedicate a bit of time to you know wiping it down putting stuff in a nice organized way so that when you go in there it's a pleasure to go in there and you don't go oh my childhood was a mess the body of my dead father's in the corner yeah if you if your dead father's in the corner ideally you want to sort that no just turn off the light that's exactly yeah so i feel like his his analogy uh goes as far as you want it to and i just think it's total bollocks basically ultimately

i think it's interesting i i because i know where he's coming from maybe it's true for an artist that you shouldn't necessarily spend too much time analyzing what you do and raking over every aspect of the way your mind works because there is a a danger that you will sort of short circuit the very thing that powers your creativity what about that john or is that a hoary old cliche as well well i think it just depends on the artist in question i think you'll have some people that want to be very very self-reflective and spend years on one project and get very obsessed about it and get it really right and overthink it and potentially end up with something really good at the end of it and you might have some artists like me who just look at a canvas and go i need to

cover it in something within 30 minutes and that's the finished thing and write the word shit on it and write the word shit or piss or slag on it and then that's you know sell it for a grand and move on well that's a good segue into me wanting to ask you about your art life oh like have you always been someone who paints and makes things or has this started since you've been a public figure i've always made things and when i was at school i used to make things on adobe flash so i would do quite a lot of silly animations and try and emulate websites that i liked and did graphic design for as a stand-up. So definitely like visuals.

But illustration and painting and all of that came a bit later, really. I always wanted to be a graphic designer. Well, you can. Yeah. Let's have a little play with things. Xavier Bowie did a lot of graphic design in his younger days. Yeah. I love a font and I love... Favourite font?

I mean, it is Helvetica, really. I mean, it's so basic, but I do... Over Ariel, you prefer it to Ariel? Oh, Ariel can get fucked. Oh, my God. Helvetica, there's a film about Helvetica where a designer is asked, why do people like Helvetica?

And he goes, why do people like shit? Why do people eat shit? I don't know. Great. That's his answer. That's my kind of answer. Yeah, really good. No, it's great stuff, isn't it?

Helvetica Bold. Oh, my Lord. Right, so you were doing that. And then when did you start painting? Proper. Right. So you were doing that. And then when did you start painting? Proper. Proper. And when did you arrive at your, I hope you are not annoyed by the comparison, your David Shrigley-esque sort of imagery? No, I'm thrilled with that. I actually had a very nice phone conversation with him recently

because I wanted to ask him some advice. And he was very nice about my artwork. And I found that very, because I was a bit scared that very that's great i was a bit scared that he thought i might be on his turf but obviously he's selling his works for way more than i could ever expect to so he's fine and um i was very touched that he liked what i do and has been very supportive but uh i think it was through my friendship with mr bingo do you know mr bingo yes he does the postcards he did the postcard book, the hate mail thing. So explain for people who don't know about Mr. Bingo, give them a little.

So he was an illustrator that was for hire and he did lots of stuff for magazines but very funny line drawings essentially. And he's got a real eye for a gag. And he started doing this thing called hate mail where you could pay him to send a kind of randomized uh offensive postcard and it would be a sort of british seaside town postcard that he would then write you know if it was you he would just say dear adam and then it would just

be a random insult that one of my favorite is this um it was a drawing of someone's sort of lower legs and it just said you've got shit shins and that's that was it and uh love mr bingo but beautifully done but very funny and he realized that was popular and so he decided he would do a book of it and crowdfund it uh i think he did it as a kickstarter and he made the money to kickstarter it so just decided that he'd spend his year making the book and going for it and then after that that was successful so he just decided he would stop doing any commercial work or work for hire and he'd just do whatever he wanted and sell it and see if he could live as an artist and he's done that successfully for over a decade now if not two decades and um his stuff is brilliant and he what i love about him is he just has these sort of grand

ideas that he does and some of the things he sells on his website you can buy his phone number and it's just written very beautifully but it's his phone number he also sold a pint with him in five years time i think it was or three years' time at a specific date. And he booked it in and everyone turned up and he had a pint with all these people that had bought the thing. That's a good idea. Just really lovely. How does the phone thing work, though?

Isn't his phone just, like, not usable anymore because people are phoning it up? Well, I think he's the sort of guy that would answer and, you know, engage with it, really. And I always liked Quentin Crisp crisp who's an influence of mine he left even though he became massively successful and famous left his phone number in the phone book and always said that if the phone rang he would answer it and so we'd sometimes spend hours on the phone just chatting to whoever had called because he saw that as a celebrity as his sort of civic duty okay give back and always

speak to people wow so that was his version of social media i guess yeah exactly yeah yeah and engaging with the people that watched him on tv and all that so i bought some art from bingo years ago and became friends with him and saw how he interacted with the art world and was inspired by the fact that he was very directly in conversation with his audience and his the people that bought his art and you know he taught me about prints and the way of doing prints in a nice way and inspired me to sort of do more of that sort of yeah thanks really so i've and i now i'm mad into prints yes and did my first series of screen prints recently mate and that was really addictive and you've got a 3d printer thing right i've got a 3d printer

uh i've got a kiln so i make pottery i am making a small ceramic run that probably won't come out until next year now but i've been working with a pottery in stoke-on-trent that proper old school pottery to sort of make it some really shit pottery that i've made they're recreating in the way that they would and they the pottery i'm working with make stuff for the royals and for like fortnum and mason people like that and they're making and they seem to be really enjoying getting their teeth into essentially what is like a child's first pottery project that they're trying to recreate en masse that's great um so yeah so so he's more than anyone else bingo has inspired me to just have a go at stuff and see how it comes out and most of the time of it's resulted in me really loving it and finding that very inspiring and fun like it's really fun to make stuff but it is you know it's play time

yeah and i'm spoiled by it and i'm aware that it's total nonsense really but then everything i do is essentially useless really yeah but of course it serves a higher purpose of bringing us joy yeah and that is the ultimate commodity that's what it's all about at the end of the day yeah yeah and pounds or dollars are quite good commodities as well i find but they exist in the service of joy acquiring joy yeah yeah yeah what do you spend most of your money on would you say that's a good question well recently doing up the roof they're expensive roofs aren't they god yeah it's like we've been living in the same place in norfolk now for 12 years or something and so now it's come around

to the first set of quite significant repairs that we've had to do yeah yeah and it's like oh this isn't fun no uh we've got everything just all at once is needed doing so there's been that so that's quite a boring answer for you but what what else do I spend money on? Yeah, if the roof was... Over the years, I've spent a lot of money on technology. Yeah. On sort of computer, camera equipment. These things don't come cheap, these little furry lads, are they? Joe is pointing at the mic covers.

And you've got a very high-tech setup here where you've got a backup recorder, I'm guessing. Yeah, that's rumbling away there. How about you? What do you spend most of your money on love tech yeah uh try what's the best thing you ever bought the best bit of tech that has been that has worked so well for you that has brought you so much joy that doesn't go wrong too often big question welcome to the tech pod joe i mean what's your best bit of tech it could end up being like boring like the ipad and i love the pencil with the ipad i use that a lot but i think the nintendo switch from a kind of hours of actual joy good answer is probably the thing that's good answer like consistent happiness what are you playing on there well the new zelda is is a masterpiece there's a game about

to be released on the switch i think it's imminent actually because i put it in my diary because i'm excited about it called tear down and it's only currently available on pc i believe it's a destruction mechanic game so you have to smash things to bits and i've watched a lot of videos of people smashing things to bits on it and it's really satisfying to me i don't know what it is i love destruction so i'm really excited to play teardown because i don't have a pc or else i've not been able to play it and i can't wait to just smash some stuff to bits that sounds good it's a big genre i mean it's a bit like asmr isn't it on youtube there's a lot of destruction vids yeah and people shredding things putting things through industrial shredders stunning yeah i watched one and it's called this machine destroys everything i'll post a link in the description yes please yeah and uh by everything what are we

talking what's an example thing blankets and leather belts and shoes and tins of paint which pop very satisfyingly uh pops a sofa in there oh it's just reminded me of the carpet cleaning instagram as well i've heard about this i haven't seen it what's the deal with that one yeah they've what the way they thrive is the fact that they use a lot of good sound effects uh-huh and almost certainly not the original noises from the cleaning there's a very heightened like that with the brush when they brush over it and they cover it in all sorts of different liquids and whatever and some of those carpets come in in a disgraceful fashion and they go out gleaming i think that could if if i disappear from the face of show business

there's a good chance i've just gone off grid to open my own carpet cleaning industry i wouldn't mind well i was talking to brid to Bridget Christie about our respective mopping techniques. And that got quite a significant amount of... I imagine she's ferocious in a way that's troubling, actually, to watch. Well, I think I sort of muscled in on the conversation by sharing with her my technique, which is to more or less soak everything, spray everything down and then just use a towel, put the towel down on the floor and then shuffle around on the towel with both feet kind of mopping everything up. It's not mopping though, is it? Why is it not mopping?

It's towel shuffling. What is the definition of mopping then? First off, a mop needs to be involved. Yeah, but the towel is being the mop. A mop is a... No, it's a towel. To mop. So you're toweling down the floor.

You're not mopping the floor. I think of mopping as a... If you used a mop head to dry yourself when you got out of the shower, you wouldn't go, oh, I toweled myself down then. You'd go,'d go i mopped myself yeah but to mop is a verb you don't necessarily need them like when you're mop as you say when you're mopping your brow if we're going down anything could be a mop you don't get the violator out this vinyl of

you know fleetwood mac is mopping up the actually Actually, that does work. That does work. Oh, God, okay, you got me. Yes! Shit. Well, at some point, there needs to be mop parameters. Otherwise, there's just no... Life becomes full chaos. Well, the problem is that to mop is a verb.

I suppose you also... People say they mop up, you know, you mop up the last of the hummus with a bit of bread. Exactly, Joe. So the bread is the mop. I can't believe you're still going on about this when you're so clearly wrong. No, I don't. I just, I'm playing it out because I don't think everything can be a mop.

I think maybe a key thing is that if it's not absorbent or if it's more liquid than the thing you're mopping. What I was thinking is can you mop, you know, when you've spilt some red wine and then you pour white on it to sort of counter it. Are you sort of mopping up the red with the white? So white wine can't be a mop. So there is a parameter there. No one ever suggested that white wine could be a mop. That's not mopping at all.

Okay. But putting a towel down on a wet floor and sliding around on it with your feet, that is mopping. I understand that you are mopping, but the towel is not to me. You and the towel do not constitute a mop. You thought this bit of conversation had finished, didn't you, listeners? You're more than that. I think you're putting yourself down to think of yourself as a mop. I'm a human mop.

I'm like the rod. My whole body becomes the handle. Don't just giggle at the word rod. I got a bit sort of fizzy when you said i'm a rot made me feel excited and i confused a bit good um our episode of travel man hasn't gone out yet has it no no is it ever likely to or is it going to get canned oh well it depends who you speak to channel four put a thing out a few months ago saying that they weren't commissioning anything really until next year because of some unique circumstances that have created a sort of fiscal issue. But basically, there's lots of shows that episodes have been filmed.

They've been done. I mean, I think we did ours. March of 2023. that episodes have been filmed they've been done i mean i think we did ours march 2023 uh but there's episodes that i filmed a year ago really that still haven't been out still haven't been out so yeah hopefully it'll go out early next year but that was a fun time man whether it goes out or not i loved that time well prague i love doing that show and you're a fabulous guest i was so thrilled that you'd said yes to it because to me i feel like you're a coup of a booking because you are clearly very uh selective over what you do yeah that's what's happening um or someone's selective about what you do but i was delighted and we had a brilliant time.

But yeah, what was it about it? I'm curious about the kind of booking process. When you heard about it, did you think, oh, that'd be fun? Or did you think, oh, I need that money? Or how did you decide on it? Yeah, that was a no-brainer. I'd been on the show before. I went to Lisbon when richard

iowadi was hosting richard iowadi oh how do you spell that he's a great comedian he's no joe lysett though right i'd like to make that clear okay anyway i'd been there with rich Richard and it was good fun. Really liked the crew, the director, Nicola. I got on very well with. She's fantastic. And it just seemed like a happy gang. You know what I mean?

Yes. And so when they got back in touch, I thought, oh, well, this is finally they've got a decent presenter as well now. Is this what you want me to say? Yes. And Prague, never been to prague i just thought well look at me this is pretty sweet this is kind of what i always imagined slash wished that it would be like if i had any kind of success in my life i would get to go on these kinds of shows so yeah it's brilliant and it was exactly how i imagine it would be plus you and i

had met a few times before and only briefly though and i just thought oh yeah that'll be fun and it was it was a great it was great fun yeah because i'd done this before and then we'd done gigs yeah we sort of came across each other at a few festivals and things like that that we talked about when you first came on the podcast back in 2019 i think but i do remember when you came on you were right sort of on the cusp of a new phase of your career you were sort of doing joe lysett's got your back and things like that yeah when we were in prague though you were a few weeks away from doing the first late night lysette show oh yeah you were preparing for that yeah we're on the way up yeah and you were quite stressed out right because that's sort of a big deal this is like your own chat show vehicle yeah i'd be interested to i feel like that was a watershed career-wise maybe i truly had sort of got to a bit of a point where I was a bit over telly

and was sort of trying to think of my exit plan and I'm not not over telly but it definitely reinvigorated my career from my own perspective and that I was enjoying doing it again because when I started I was just excited to be on tell. Couldn't believe I had my own show and couldn't believe that I could, you know, experiment with formats, whatever. And then realised that some of the limitations of studio were really difficult for me and just didn't feel like I was good at it and still don't feel like pre-recorded studio stuff is for me.

Feel like it's really hard work. And then suddenly doing live, something clicks in my head where it goes you it has to be the show it has to be good and it's like doing live stand-up again and if something goes wrong I kind of love it because I get excited that I worked around it and certain things in late night life sit where the auto cue went down at one point or a prop that I was expecting to be there wasn't there and I found the fact that I could deal with that really invigorating and exciting and I think well

definitely of all the TV experiences I've had it's the most fun I've had and really excited to do the next series but I did go into it with that headspace of going my career is over I'm not going to do any telly again what a nice experience it was to be on telly and to be a bit famous but it's all done and so let's just you know this is the last hurrah and that headspace allowed me to enjoy it and to go into it and actually be all right that's it and not over think the thing and not kill the thing but it was really fun watching the first episode having spent a few days with with you in Prague and talked about the show. And I just thought, oh, yeah, he's nailed it. Oh, wow.

It's great. You looked so comfortable and it was really funny and it had such a good generosity of spirit. And it was like all the things that I liked most about a show like TFI Friday or things like that. Plus other plus vick and bob and yeah all those things that i like most about their shows were in there oh well that means a lot is it the sort of thing that you would be you would go on or would you find that oh my god i've just seen a man's penis is there a naked man across the way he's's looking at himself in the mirror. Oh, he's just clocked us. I'm leaning back.

You're still looking at him. Is he still looking at you? Well, I think he definitely looked over and now he's putting some clothes on. He's quite a good looking guy. He's a handsome guy. Wow. I've never seen anyone nude like that. Listeners, it is nighttime outside.

We're recording in London and across the way from the flat where we're recording is, it's like Rear Window, the Hitchcock movie. Yeah. And so there's some apartments facing out towards us. Load of windows. That's done something to me, that. And in one of them, there's a guy totally getting changed. I was watching him about half an hour or so ago, because he was on the phone, and he was wearing a black T-shirt,

and I thought, he's handsome. I couldn't really see his features, but I just thought, looks like a nice guy. Did not think I would get, you know, the full cock and bollies did you see him taking his clothes off no he just emerged fully naked and then just put some pants on just then stunning when do you want me back on the podcast i'll be here whenever you want. Wait, this is an advert for Squarespace. Every time I visit your website, I see success.

Yes, success. The way that you look at the world makes the world want to say yes. It looks very professional. I love browsing your videos and pics and I don't want to stop. And I'd like to access your members area and spend in your shop. These are the kinds of comments people will say about your website if you build it with Squarespace. Just visit squarespace.com slash Buxton for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, because you will want to launch, use the offer code BUXTON to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

So put the smile of success on your face with Squarespace. Yes. Continue. Hey, excuse me, can I use your dictaphone? No. Yes. What do I say? No, use your finger like everyone else keeping it squelchy hey welcome back podcats that was joe lysett talking to me there and I'm very grateful to Joe for making the time

in his extremely ludicrously busy life to come and waffle with me. We only spoke just less than a month ago and even in the few weeks since then he has been making the news with other pranky protests, this time about the water company's dumping sewage, and he's been making a documentary about that, which is going to go out next year, I think. On Channel 4, always good to see Joe, though. And I hope at some point our episode of Travelman will go out with us pratting about in Prague. But we had some good fun.

We went to a restaurant where there was about 24 courses. We saw some great weird art. We went kayaking on quite a cold day on the river Vlatava. I had to look that up. I couldn't remember what the river was called. I have to look everything up these days. And I don't know whether it's just a side effect of getting older and the old hard drive getting full,

or if it's just because I've become too reliant on looking things up rather than reaching for the answer in the memory banks itself. You know what I mean? So now my brain, it just goes, oh, you're just going to Google it. So I'm not going to bother. You know, if the brain wanted to do the work, it probably could. Tell me that the Blue Peter presenter on the Ronnie O'Sullivan documentary that I was watching last night was Simon Groom but instead it just said that just google it so that's what I had to do and then my wife said who's the other Blue Peter presenter and I confidently said oh it's Roy Castle and, oh, gosh, your brain's better than mine.

Mine's going. Of course, it wasn't Roy Castle. It was John Noakes. Anyway, why did I get there? Oh, yeah, because of the Vlatava. So, yes, I don't know when that Travelman episode will go out. Maybe never. Who knows?

Yes, good, that Ronnie O'Sullivan documentary. The Edge of Everything. It was another one of those sport docs for people who don't necessarily think they care about sport docs. It's a good, very well filmed portrait of a tortured soul.

Like, incredibly skilled sports person and yet not able to relax and enjoy it at all like to to get himself as good as he needs to got to be a way that he can bypass that it doesn't need to be like that there's just something that his mind is doing that is making success concomitant on mental turmoil and unhappiness. But my wife was saying, that's just what some people are like. Maybe. Anyway, recommend it. So where was I? Joe Lysett.

Yes. A few links in the description. There's the link to the last few tickets for the London Palladium live podcast show. I won't be in a glass box with Rosie doing poos in the corner. I'll just be on a stage talking to a guest, a previous friend of the podcast, with possible musical guest as well. Other links in today's show notes. You've got Joe Lice, its official website. Lots of interesting stuff on there.

Not only details of whatever pranktivism he is engaging in, but also his live shows. And you can download previous live shows that he's done. And there's his art on there as well. It's a fun place to visit. There's also a link to Mr Bingo's website, the artist that Joe was talking about being inspired by. And he's got some very funny artwork there as well,

available for sale in various forms. Link to a couple of satisfying YouTube videos this machine destroys everything that is the tip of the iceberg for machines destroying everything videos though there's loads on YouTube that was quite an old one I think machines destroying everything technology has come a long way since then and satisfying carpet cleaning videos as well. That is another big genre.

I've put one of those in the links of today's description. Oh, cold, cold, cold. Phone away. I washed my phone last week, listeners. Phone away. I washed my phone last week, listeners. Speaking of the old hard drive getting full slash corrupted. After years and years having an occasional panicked moment after loading the washing machine and setting the cycle running, thinking, where's my phone? Oh no, I put my phone in the washing machine. Oh no. But realizing like, no, no, it's just on the side. I wouldn't put my phone in the washing machine.

The buckle's mental safety protocols are too rigid for that. But last week, protocol failure. I was trying to find my phone to make a call to a delivery company to ask where the hell my package was after being assured it would arrive three weeks ago. And no phone. Where's the phone? I'm retracing my steps. Did I put it there? Did I put it in some weird place when I was in the kitchen? What? Where did I put it? In some weird place when I was in the kitchen? What? And then finally I thought,

I'll just check the washing machine, even though, you know, we've got the protocols. They would have kicked in. And there, on the ledge of the window of the washing machine sits my phone. Well, it was the wallet.

The phone wallet. Paper driver's licence. Peeking out, all disintegrated. It was a long cycle as well. And the phone had been in there for a couple of hours. When I got it out, it was good and smashed. Even then, I gamely googled, can a phone survive going in a washing machine for two hours?

No. No, it can't. You've got your modern waterproof phones. You can immerse those for up to half an hour in a washing machine, apparently. You might get lucky. But two hours? Forget about it. It was very sad.

But I think maybe the most distraughtening aspect was the mental protocol failure. I just thought, oh, no. We're in that zone now, are we? Phone in the washing machine. Oh, well. Apparently worse things happen at sea that seawater is very corrosive for electronics thanks very much to Seamus Murphy Mitchell for

his invaluable production support and conversation editing on this episode cheers Seamus thanks to Helen Green she does the artwork for the podcast. Thank you very much to all at ACAST for their sponsor liaison help. But thank you most of all to you. Thank you so much for listening right the way to the end. I appreciate it. And for that reason,

I think it's time we had a hug. I'm wearing my fluorescent yellow padded ski jacket today, which I'm very grateful for and is keeping the worst of the bitey cold out. So I hope you're well padded as well. But if you're not, hey, come here and get warm. But if you're not, hey, come here and get warm. Good to see you. Until next time, we are together in waffle space. Go carefully.

Be soft. And for what it's worth, remember, I love you. Bye! Like and subscribe. Please like and subscribe. Give me a little smile and a thumbs up. Nice, take a pint, wear me a thumbs up. Give me a little smile and a thumbs up. Nice, take a pint, wear me a thumbs up. Please like and subscribe. Like and subscribe.

Please like and subscribe. Please like and subscribe. Please like and subscribe. ស្រូវាប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បាន�次は、ステップ3のトレーニングを行います。 Thank you.