The Always Sunny Podcast - The Gang Finds A Dead Guy

Episode Date: December 3, 2021

Love the face, hate the voice.

You told a story about seeing some dead bodies the other day. We should have saved it for this one, but maybe we could... That would have made more sense. Well, maybe we cut it into this episode. Or maybe we just make it as confusing as the first season of the show. That's an unusual technique in process, I think, yeah. Just sort of finding it. Finding it as we go.

But I think it's fun that the audience is finding it as we find it. So it's a shared experience. What do you mean? Well, I mean, you know, they're seeing the creative process in action. Well, it's like, hey, this doesn't work, right? But we're going to air it anyway because we want you to be a part of the process listener. Okay. So are you saying you're going to get feedback from people on this thing?

No, no, no, this is an outgoing communication. Got it. But I think it's going to be fun for people to kind of see how bad things can get. Well, let me ask you a question, Rob. Okay. Since we're talking about this, how do you feel the podcast is going so far? I think it's pretty good. I think if our general rule is like we always kind of approach the show this way,

which is like if we're laughing, then at least it's fun for us. And I think that alone is a good enough reason to do it. And what if we're not laughing like right now? Well, sometimes not. Could also be interesting. Yeah. Life's not always about laughter. There's lots of, you know, I mean, you know.

Like what's your take on God? You know, that kind of stuff. Well, we addressed that in the show. We addressed that show. We did? Well, and it's always sunny and filled out. Oh, right. You know, I, I, for a long time I felt this pressure and I think it's understandable to

be funny all the time when doing like interviews and podcasts and, you know, red carpet events and things like that. And I found that it was taking me to a really dark place because I was resentful. You? Wait, you were getting dark? You went to a dark place. Can you believe that? Can you believe that?

I cannot. Yeah. Guys, you know what's funny? What? Dead bodies. What? Now, in this episode, we found a dead body and we started with, with a crack about Tom Brady.

Now, at the time it was 2005, correct? And I believe we had just watched him or I had just watched him beat the Eagles. And that would have made it three Super Bowls for Tom Brady in 2005. Three already by 2005. And I think we were making some sort of joke about how we were going to hurt him. But you were going to break his arm. Yes. And of course, then D, rightfully so, suggests that there's no way we could beat up Tom Brady.

Tom Brady would beat the living crap out of all of us, especially me. And then either way, Tom Brady went on to win four more, three more Super Bowls after that and play in five, maybe six. And he's played in about 10 AFC Champions. I mean, the last Super Bowl there was. He won. Yeah. Rob had dinner with Tom Brady the other night.

Yeah. That's where you've gotten to in life. And did you really? You invited me, a kid from New England, and I declined and I'm going to go with him. What? He didn't want to go. I didn't want to go. Yeah.

My wife did a commercial with Tom Brady in the early 2000s. I don't remember. It was for some sort of credit card or something like that. You can, I think you can find it online somewhere. I think we looked it up on YouTube once because I wanted to see that. Glenn, did you do? I did a ton of commercials. Did you do commercials?

I tried. You know, I have a funny story about when I first graduated from college and I was meeting with agents and things like that, I met with a commercial agent. Is that what they're called? Yeah. Abrams Artist was the joint in New York, I remember. Yeah. There was one other one.

Cunningham, SEMNM. Yeah. That's SEMNM. That's who I was with. That's who I was with too. Yeah. I don't remember. So I went to...

Schiffman, Ekman, Morrison and Marx. That was the other one? No, the fuck. No, that's SEMNM. Okay. And M&M. I think that's the one that I was with. Anyway, I went to meet with somebody there who was like one of the main guys there or

whatever. I'm like waiting for a long time. They've got me sat at like a coffee table area or whatever. Guy finally shows up. He comes in, he sits down across from me and he just looks at me, you know, just looks at me and I'm like, what the fuck is going on? I'm like, hi, hi, nice to meet you. He's like, yeah, mm-hmm.

Just looks at you. I know. I know this story. Of course I know. I don't know. You know what I know. You do. I know.

Maybe you'll get it when you meet him. I know. You'll remember it. I don't know. I think you'll remember it when I say it. Yeah. So he's just staring at me, looking at me and I'm like, this is fucking so weird. Like he's taking like a full, I mean, you know, like the longest 15 seconds of my life,

you know, he finally he goes, BHB, keep in mind, I'm like this kid just straight out of college wasn't really a kid, like 24 felt like a kid. And I'm like, oh, I'm sorry. What do you mean? He's like BHB. And I was like, I'm so sorry. I don't, I'm new to this, but I don't know what you're saying. Blow him, boy.

Somebody shines in from another office. Blow him, boy. From behind the glass wall. We're filming. It's still the late 90s. He could get away with it. No, that's not what BHB stands for. But I mean, this guy was so fucking douchey.

It was like, he was, he just, he loved like that. I didn't know what he was talking about. He loved the power. It's like, it's a weird, it's fucking thing. And I was like, I'm so sorry. I don't know the terms. I don't know what that is. I don't know what you're saying to me.

I'm so sorry. You know, I'm just, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm a child. He was like big heads book. Oh my God. Never heard this story. So he was both complimented.

I would remember that. I would remember that. He was looking at me. He was looking at my head and he was going, you're going to book stuff because you've got a big head and big heads book. And you know what? He was wrong.

Well, I don't know about that. I mean, John Travolta has got the biggest head that has ever been put on. So does Danny DeVito. Well, that's true. That's a bowling ball. That's a bowling ball. That's an extra large bowling ball.

It's sitting atop his shoulders. I didn't book any commercials though to answer your question. I didn't book a single fucking. Well, because you didn't blow them. Like, let's be honest. That's really what it was about. That's what BHB released it for. I think so.

He can't get you to commercials though. He's just getting you in the door. Then you've got to do that. You've got to get in that door and then start blowing. But I also, by the way, I also probably went to 10 commercial auditions total before I just went, you know what? I don't care how much money it is. I'm not doing this anymore.

And I just stopped going because I was like, I'll live off $400 a week doing off-Broadway plays. This is so fucking humiliating. I hate, and this is by the way, no offense to people who do commercials. I get it, you make a lot of money. It's a great way to make a living. And certainly if you've got a family of feet,

it makes a lot of sense. Personally, I just, I did not like it. I didn't like it. I didn't like how it made me feel. I didn't like the auditions. I was like, this is a fucking waste of my time. Coming out of Juilliard where you're like working on scene and character and they're like, all right.

So here, your soup's really hot. And you got to tell your buddy, give him that like, oh my God, it's hot. Look, but you know. Like a who guy? Like really like a big, you know. And then the hot chick walks by and you're like, but that's hot too.

And then you're like, you know, someone yells three dos and then, you know, and then. And then your eyes pop out of your head. Yeah, yeah. And then maybe say something funny, but don't. And then, yeah. Yeah. And then there's only four or 500 other guys

that are looking for the same part. And I had the opposite experience. I booked the first commercial audition I ever went in on. Wow. Yeah. Wow. It was for Foot Locker. You were, you did a lot of things.

Oh wait, can we find, can the listener find your Foot Locker commercial? You know, that was not out there. My, my cascade ones out there. What was the one where you were on the stairs? You were passing somebody on some stairs, maybe talking about bagels or something. Oh, that's Thomas's bagels.

That's out there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And with a voice over somebody else's. No, no, that was. Oh, what? They put somebody else's voice over?

That was exaggerate. Yeah. That was exaggerate. When you were on a date. Yeah. I'm on a date and the girl throws water in my face and then it cuts to like a box of exaggeration. And they say like, I didn't know she was your sister.

So it's implied that I was staring at her sister or something. And it was about like some tabs that dissolve quickly. You don't need water. Like that was a joke. I did a like a two hour session with the, with the producers trying to get me to say, I didn't know she was your sister in the way that they wanted. And I was like,

they probably were just hearing this voice and being like, I didn't know that voice was on that face. This is what we're going to do here. Love the face. Hate the voice. Love the vase. Hate the voice. But, but.

The Charlie Day story. I had enough self confidence at that point to be like, in my mind, like, okay guys, go fuck yourself. Go fuck yourself. Get somebody else to do it. And that's what they did. That is what they did. And it was like a British accent.

If I may, Charlie, you know, and look, you're still a very handsome man, but you were strikingly handsome as a young man. Wow. Truly. I don't understand why. You cover it up with the beard all the time because I, whenever you shave, I'm always like, look at that.

I tell you what happened with the beard. Look at that jawline. Look at it. Very handsome. Here's what happened with the beard. We, we were like, oh, it'd be funny for the character to do the, to have the beard. Sonny, he's scraggly and he's, you know, sloppy.

He's not taking care of him. So he doesn't care about like a night shave. And then we never stopped doing the show. Yeah. So then I would be between gigs and they were like, well, you might as well just keep the beard because then it's going to, like we're going to run back in the sunny. And then I just, and then it was like, well,

it's going to frighten people and disappoint them. So I just kept the beard. But that's nice to say. Glenn, I did not feel strikingly handsome growing up. You've got a very, you've got a very handsome, very symmetrical face. Well, thank you. Thank you.

And I enjoy looking at it on a daily basis. And you know what? You also look good with a mustache. Women did, women did not agree with you when I was in school. I think, I find that hard to believe. I do too. I think maybe you weren't picking up on it. Guys, we were young men and they would flock to the two of you and

they'd be like, there's that one. He doesn't seem neurotypical. And then they would just go away. Well, maybe the fact that you're, you are not neurotypical was just neurotypical matters. I don't know. We don't know. But like the things like, you know, ADHD or whatever go into like,

Oh, I see. But maybe you weren't picking up on the social cues. No, that is true. Okay. So you wanted to have a flashing green light to try anything. Yes. Yes. So did I.

I remember dating and going in college once where I went on like nine days with her and she's like, are you going to kiss me? I'm like, okay. So this is like, So you want that. So this is something you want. Okay. You want my lips to.

Okay. Yeah. I was not. I was always the same way, Charlie. I could, I'm so, so, so not like Dennis in that regard. I needed a big, as you said, flashing green go sign before I would ever make a move. But mostly because I was just so terrified of rejection, terrified of ever having a moment in my life where I went to kiss a girl and she was like,

Nope, nope, nope. Charlie tells a great story of that. I did that once. And that's kind of it. That really scarred you. It scarred you? What's that story? What's that story?

You know, there was a girl I liked her and we had a flirtatious relationship and I think it was probably early 20s, 21, 22. I think I heard the story. Of course I have. Of course. And I think I asked Hornsby. I was like, what's the deal? Do you think she likes me?

And Hornsby was like, just go, just, just try. And then there was like a moment, a little charged moment where I thought, okay, maybe this is enough. And then I tried to kiss her and her face scrunched up like she just sucked like 900 lemons. And I, I mean, that is, that's, that's the worst. That's got to be the worst feeling. She was very nice about it.

She's like, it's not you. I'm just this guy that I'm with. I'm like, but I'm like, no, it's, it's, it's me. And I'm dead. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for putting you through that. No, no, no, it's, I am so, I misread the room. I'm going to, I'm going to go.

I'm going to, I'll be fine. I'll be fine. Yeah. Glenn, you said there's a noose around here somewhere, right? Yeah. No, but that was fun. That was the only, that was the only one time, but, you know. Rob, you, you were the kind of person who would get rejected and you'd just be like,

well, I guess onto the next, like you, you would, you were, you were playing the numbers game, weren't you? Yeah. The rejection was coming so often and it's such high volume that it. It's kind of like getting in cold water. Yeah. But I think that again, if we're going to get back into the psychology that we've set up earlier in previous episodes, it has something to do with hitting puberty late.

So you got, you got to just try, you know, like you're 17, 16, 17 and all like the, met like the boys who are becoming men are the ones that are attractive to the women, not the five foot two obnoxious one. Right. So I was trying just, just. Just do my best to, you know. But I mean, this, this was still the case well into your 20s. Yeah.

Because I took that with me, which was like, I didn't take it even though I should have taken it personally because it is quite personal to try to attract a woman and her to reject you, but I would take the rejection and then I would just, I would say, okay, thank you very much. And then I'd move on to the next rejection. I think that's good. Listen, I, on some level, I think that's very, very healthy. I think it's good to acclimate yourself.

Look, go after what you want and acclimate yourself to failure so that it doesn't completely destroy you and you still continue to pursue whatever it is that you're going. Yeah. You're like a tick. Like the tick doesn't mind if someone picks, you know, flicks it across the room and picks it out of the hair. It goes and it finds other hair. Yeah.

You're like a tick, Rob. It's also, I've accepted that a long time ago. I've attached myself to you guys. That's true. You didn't even know this. And drained us dry. Yeah. I did it to my wife.

You guys are aware of it. Hey guys, shut up. He's a human parasite. Hey guys, shut the hell up. Today's podcast is brought to you by air. 95% of air breathers survive. Breathe air. Get air in your mouth.

This episode that we just watched, so much of our transition music. I feel like Dennis, you're finding Dennis a little bit in this, the dynamic between the two of you. Yeah. Very funny. Max really finding his sexuality. I think we, you see this, the seeds being planted that we knew we were going to use later down the road with Matt coming out.

That was very clean. I don't know what you're talking about. That's sarcasm. It doesn't play. There were a lot of firsts in this episode. We found some new transition music. As you said, this is the first time where we actually wrote funny stuff for Dee, like pretty much from start to finish where she wasn't a wet blanket.

She had a very funny objective, which is to try and overcome her fear of old people, to try and have a relationship with her grandfather. But she's so disgusted by old people that she can't move past it. And it was just really fun to watch Caitlin finally get to do something really, really funny. It's kind of like a defensive mode for her. I think we've, we really kind of hit a stride with her when we made her go pure offensive. Oh, totally.

Yeah. We made her just as despicable as we are because you're right. The comedy came from a much more of a reactive place than an active place. Also the first time it feels like we have one of those scenes that we then went to the well and continue to go to the well because it's so fun of the two characters sitting across from some authority figure. Right. Yeah.

And trying to do something ridiculous. Right. Like a medium curator. Yes. Trying to sell the Nazi uniform. Yes. Right. And that we.

And not picking up on the cues and just sort of like barreling through it. And yeah. Yeah. And I think I'll bet you you could go through our editing room and find, we always, we would always shoot and we, I think we still do it from time to time is shoot headers to those scenes because we're like already in the chairs generally and the person is coming into their own office. So sorry I'm late.

Yeah. So you, you had to, you know. So we would shoot a scene. We definitely scripted it and we shoot a scene basically talking about what we were going to do. The characters were like, okay, here's what we're going to do and here's how we're going to do it. And then we didn't have enough experience to realize like, well, why don't we just do

it instead of talk about what we're going to do it. And yet we kept writing it and kept shooting it. So I'll bet you there's like hundreds of those scenes that you've never seen headers that we had or is there where the characters are explaining what they're about to do. They're just riveting. Yeah. And we would do it at the end of a scene too. She's like, now let's go to so and so is playing or something like that.

Yeah. Yeah. At least we had the presence of mind to cut that stuff in the editing room. I mean, it's not so bad to shoot it, have it in case for some reason you get in the editing room and you realize, you know, this is actually a little confusing. I don't know why. Sometimes you need it. Sometimes you don't.

Hey guys, I caught another band sticker in that bar scene. I think it's a band, a Venge seven fold. Did you, have you guys been seeing those stickers? Let's look it up. I will say we, we did crack the case of those thrice stickers. We did. We remembered that there was a person who worked in that Harold examiner building that was the old newspaper, paper factory that the bar set was in, who was sticking those

stickers up. Yeah. Baxter. Oh, Bax. Bax, you son of a bitch. You had no right to do that. You had no right to push your agenda on our audience. Your thrice and Bax agenda all over our show.

Now, I will say that there is a system of checks and balance that, that balances that is in place for that, like say the art department, who might be looking to see what's being put up in our department. Did we have an art department? I don't know. There was a deal that was cut. Pretty bare bones. Yeah.

Bax cut. A deal that was cut. Yeah. Money was changing hands. Yeah. Let me get these stickers in here. Yeah. Yeah.

A back room Baxter. Baxter. Baxter. Baxter. Baxter cuts some deals under our nose and got his stickers up Bax. That's a real. Dirty bird. That's a real downtown LA mentality.

Yeah. Yeah. That was the way things were done. 20's of dollars. 20's of dollars. 20's of dollars. Like multiple 20's. Yeah.

For that. For the extras. They're like, no. Right. Will you send me the extras to my trailer? No. Kind of put the stickers up. Yeah.

You know, that's probably what happened. There you go. That's the way it was done. And this is going to be a little bit sadder than the other requests. But can I just hang out with you guys? I remember him hanging out though. No. He did.

That's what I'm saying. He did hang out. He did hang out. We didn't have a problem. Guys, Bax. It's confirmed that that is a band. Avenged Sevenfold has a song on Spotify that has been listened to 319 million times.

So guys, we are the assholes. Bax, that's a lot of listening pal. Bax has been listening to that song like crazy. There we go. Yes. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Yeah.

There's a fucking AC-DC. I like it. Yeah, that's some AC-DC shit, isn't it? I can get down with this. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. I can get down with this. Okay, Bax. Okay. Bax. Oh, oh, oh. Chaka, chaka, chaka, chaka, come on. Okay, guess how about some lyrics?

It just sort of goes on and on like that for 15 fucking minutes. 300 million people are like, I'm enjoying the never ending intro to a song. No, that sounded great guys. Avenge Sevenfold, my apologies to you. You're better at what you do than we are. You guys are clearly very good at what you're doing.

And again, just like with Thrice, I'm gonna hit the gym. I'm gonna put on your album and you've got one song to hook me because I don't have a lot of patience. Yeah. Get one song guys. Here's a genuine question about that first season which I do not recall.

Rob, where were you living when we shot that very first season? We had apartments right next to each other. Was that season one? Yeah, season one. Rob had an apartment on Coldwater Canyon with Chris Backus for a long time. But after that, I lived with Charlie.

Then yeah, you lived in my house for a little bit. For a little while and then you- I got kicked the fuck out of there. And then- Cause you guys were getting married. Cause you guys were getting married. Oh, we're getting married. And you were like, look, we don't need a roommate.

And then you were living in Shiloh Strong's guest house. Yes. Wasn't I living there at the time? You were- I was living in the garage. For the first part of it, yes you were. And when we shot the FX pilot and all that, you were. But by the end,

cause I actually specifically remember writing to bring it back to this episode, us working on this episode together and going through stuff in what became your apartment, which was literally right next to my apartment in West Hollywood on Crescent Heights. My memory of that is that you guys were there when we did the pilot,

but you guys were there when we did the first season, huh? Yeah, so- The pilot I was definitely in the garage. You were in the garage, I think for quite a bit of that. And then we did the first season- Oh Shiloh Strong, I wonder how that guy's doing. I really like him. He's good, I think so the moment's in a while.

Yeah, I've talked to him a couple of times, but I haven't seen him as much- Brother of Ryder Strong? Brother of Ryder Strong, yeah. Boy Meets World thing. Boy Meets World, yeah. And many other things. Ryder Strong, who I always felt like

kind of looked like you, Charlie. Similar look. It's kind of similar looks. I feel like you and Ryder Strong could definitely play brothers. Cool. Well, I'll pretend I know who that is. Oh, okay.

You've been there. No, I know who it is, but I need pictures. I need- At least acknowledge what a fucking cool name that is. It's a cool name. Ryder Strong. Do you remember that what their dad's name was? Ryder Strong.

Yes, King Arthur Strong. No, it wasn't. I swear to God, wasn't that- Shut up. Am I making that up? No, I swear to God. I swear to God. Google it.

Look it up, Megan. I swear to God, Shiloh and Ryder- Oh, that dude, yeah, I know. Yeah, look at that guy. Come on, make it definitely- I can't remember names. Face is no problem. King Arthur Strong.

Yeah. What did I say? A firefighter. He's a firefighter. I don't know these days, these guys are badass. I figured he would have worked at like, you know, like one of those, what are those places where you can pretend

to be a knight and a king and- Oh, yeah, medieval times. Medieval times, that's what it is. And I remember that Shiloh was very handy. Yes. Like he was always- And he was a volunteer firefighter. He was a volunteer firefighter.

He was also doing a bunch of shit in his house all the time. I mean, the guy, he was an actor and a good one, but he also had like a lot of other shit that he was into, which is also so healthy because I never had any of that. Yeah. You know, play a little basketball on the side, but not very good at it.

Always twisted my ankle and whatnot. Yeah. Well, that's good. How's your ankle now? Well, I don't play basketball anymore. It's fine. Yeah, it's fine. It healed.

But it scarred me for a while. I was not aggressive on the back. Scared, scared to take it to the hole. I was scared, right. I was scared to bring it all the way to the hole. We would play basketball. That was like, we did play basketball. Played a lot of basketball.

We played basketball. You did roll your ankle one time. Were you there? Oh, yeah. For that one? That was the big one that destroyed me. That was a bad one. Then you guys got into racquetball for a little bit.

We sure did. Well, cause you could play it at the Y. Yeah, we were, cause we were editing. Well, we were editing- I had anger issues. You see, I had much more anger issues than you did. Buddy, you were breaking- I transferred.

You were smashing racquetball rackets left and right. You were so angry. It was hard to watch. You lost that. I kind of liked it. Yeah, I lost it. I kind of liked it. What do you attribute that to?

Wild success and money and fame and- Wait a minute, wait a minute. What are you talking about? Growing up. Growing up a little bit. Growing up a little bit. Growing up a little bit. Growing up a little bit.

You know the Bruce Springsteen song? It's not all about you and you can let stuff go. A little bit. I think so. I think so. But how many golf clubs have you smashed in the last year? Go. No, I man, you've not been tossing clubs.

I'm super proud of you. See? Super proud of you. In the last two years, I've broken one or two clubs, but name me a golfer who hasn't. Name me a golfer who hasn't. I've only smashed one phone. And I smashed one laptop,

but that's cause the laptop was pooping out on me already. And I punched it and the screen shattered. And it was kind of awesome. Oh, that's cool. I wish I could have seen that. I mean, I punched it as hard as I could. And I did exactly what you wanted. Oh, that's fucking awesome.

You really got made contact with it. That was very satisfying. It did exactly what it wanted. It splintered the screens. Yeah, the screen splintered like a windshield. I'm sorry. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. What are you doing, Rob?

Oh, Jesus. I can't do that. I immediately shamed myself, right? When I called you Meg, I was like, I have to tell people. I went to Caitlyn, I was like, Caitlyn, I'm a child. I can't believe I just did this. I'm 43 years old. I punched a computer and it was awesome.

Sticking with this bit. What are you doing? Over the love of you. What am I doing, Rob? You're doing space odyssey 2001. 2001 of space odyssey. That's right. Really?

I don't remember that scene. As he's shutting down, he's singing Daisy Daisy. And he's getting, it's getting slower. See, I delete the files, guys. I just like, I delete. You can't delete that one. That's the greatest movie I've ever made. I don't want to.

I think we should have a whole separate podcast, maybe as a bonus episode, of stories that I know that you guys know that you told each other. Ooh, that's a fun game. Well, you remember them all, though. I don't know why I do. Just name one. What just happened today?

No, no, no, I'd never heard that story. Well, that's the thing, you don't know what you don't remember. No, he's saying stories that we don't remember that he does. Yeah, that he, he told, you know that story. What story was this? Well, he's talking, oh my God. I don't recall this one. BHB.

What is this out? What's BHB? You have said. I've never heard this. I think on every, it's fascinating to say that you've never heard, and you're saying that with such confidence, you've never heard that story before. When also, I mean, 30 seconds ago, and once every podcast,

you make it very clear that you delete file, right? Yeah. No, I've never said that. You know what I really love in that episode, guys? The moment where Caitlyn, where Sweet D, throws up through her fingers. That's a very specific thing that anyone who's ever gotten a little too drunk, or been a little too sick, knows that thing of where you're like running

to try to get to the fucking toilet on a tiny, you don't quite get there. So it just comes right through your fingers. Oh. It's a funny thing when we have a good choice. What if we do a scene like that, you got to put a little cream on it, and then you're like, oh, I'm going to do it. That you got to put a little cream and mushroom soup in your mouth, and it's cold.

And it actually really does make you feel like you're going to throw up. It makes you feel like you have a mouthful of throw up. Well, it depends on the kind of food you're used to eating. If you're used to eating a diet like I eat, it actually tastes pretty good. Is that two or three vomit scenes in this first season? And what was the other one? We decided not to do comedy. The kid vomits.

Oh, the kid. The kid vomits. Is there another one? Because I think we maybe even shot another one, and we were like, oh, this is good, guys. What are we doing here? Yeah, what are we doing? We're the vomit show.

We're going to hit PPE and vomit show. But you know what? It's how certain people are going to label us no matter what we do. When people talk about life being like a simulation, you know, it's all one big computer simulation, and it's not to explain to me diarrhea. Like why? Like that part of the simulation? Yeah.

Why does someone want to simulate that? What are they trying to study? They want to take you down a peg. What are they trying to get at? The simulation needs to take you down a peg. So I was simulating Glenn the other day, and then I thought I'd have him run. So I gave him those stomach cramps, and you know, you ran to the bathroom. Is that the computer program we're talking, or is that the computer?

It's whoever's enjoying the simulation. Ah, oh, it's the overlord who's actually created it. Yeah, it's the overlord. Yeah, it's like, give Glenn diarrhea. Oh, you give Glenn diarrhea? Well, I gave him a Johnny diarrhea. It's multiple overlords. Yeah.

Well, yeah. It's not just one. One person giving everyone diarrhea? Come on. No way. Not possible. Not possible. It's the stupidest thing.

I got a question for you guys. I thought it was just sort of ending. Why? And this is for anyone, really. Like, why do people want to see the dead bodies of their loved ones after they die? I look. I understand. Closure.

Closure. You can't close without, you know, like, I need to see the person that I loved dead and lifeless in order to close that chapter. Are you fucking kidding me? I understand both sides of that. Okay. Tell us about that. I find the whole thing so fucking morbid.

Well, so often. Oh, yeah, because death is involved. Yeah. Yeah. No, that's not... No, I just... Oh, that is the definition of the word, isn't it? That would be it, right?

I know. I know. Yeah. What are we going to say? You know, somebody dies suddenly and, yes, your brain can accept the fact that that is life and death. And sometimes somebody... You need that final image of the dead body burned into your brain so that that's the

thing you remember. Yes, even though you... That makes sense. You can... You can... Well, that's what I mean. It's not an intellectual pursuit. It's not the one you want.

I mean, I... Okay, so it's been a couple days, your friend has died and you're still so emotional that you're like, I want the last image of my friend or my loved one to be their lifeless fucking corpse. Well, Glenn, what if... Turn up like a prom queen. What if you didn't see them? What if you didn't see them?

What if the moment where they... You've seen them before. That's why you're at the funeral. You've seen them many times. They're your friend. Your loved one. Yes. Okay.

Glenn, we can cut this. But let's say your kid is missing. Okay. Your child is missing. Yes. And then you find out that your child is dead. Yeah. Do you not want to see the body?

Absolutely not. No fucking way. Not even... Not in a million years. I would say that that takes a lot of discipline. I understand. Discipline? Wow.

I don't want to see my kid's dead fucking body. Well, again... That seems horrible to me. Yes. It is. I don't want to see that. I don't want to see that. Maybe I think the psychology sometimes is to know that it's real.

You know, to be like, I can't... This is so... Such a shocking... I'll have Jill look at it. I'll Jill look at it. Okay. We put her through it. She likes that guy.

I just cut this, cut this, cut this. Cut that, cut that, cut that. Cut that, cut that, cut that. Oh, seriously. Cut that shit. Yeah, yeah. We'll be out before you start talking about it. Yeah, let's do that.

Let's do that. We've done it. We did it. We did it earlier. Yeah, we've done the thing. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.