The Amelia Project - The Arthur Archives - 1

Episode Date: May 19, 2023

"You are just a random person, discovering a message in a bottle..." The first episode of our new bonus series The Arthur Archives, in which each minisode follows on from the previous week's regular release. Listen to the entirety of The Arthur Archives (as well as all the previous bonus series such as The Alvina Archives and The Amelia Audio Advent Calendar) by becoming a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ameliapodcast This episode featured Alan Burgon as The Interviewer. It was written by Oystein Ulsberg Brager with music and sound design by Adam Raymonda. Dedicated to Bryce Godmer. Website: https://ameliapodcast.com  Transcripts: https://ameliapodcast.com/transcripts Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ameliapodcast Donations: https://ameliapodcast.com/support Twitter: https://twitter.com/amelia_podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ameliapodcast/ Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/ameliapodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Your teen requested a ride, but this time, not from you. It's through their Uber Teen account. It's an Uber account that allows your teen to request a ride under your supervision with live trip tracking and highly rated drivers. Add your teen to your Uber account today. Cold tapes. A gripping crime story that will chill you to the bone. You know, life on the base means, well, it's close to six months without light. That does things to people.

That study that he was doing to watch us and then set off us like mice around this special little experiment. How many people are on this base? Sixteen on this one. Someone amongst them is our killer. Experience Cold Tapes, the murder mystery podcast game. Start your investigation where you get your podcasts. Hello, dear listeners. Today we have a special bonus release, the first episode of The Arthur Archives, a new mini-series with episodes that follow on from every regular episode. In The Arthur Archives,

we get to spend a bit more time with the interviewer and get to know his innermost thoughts. Normally, these episodes are exclusive to patrons of the show, as a thank you for supporting our work, But we thought we'd make this very first episode of the Arthur Archives public for everyone. Each Arthur Archives episode picks up from the plot of the previous week's regular release and gives you some more details, backstory and the interviewer's musings. So today's episode follows on from last week's Die Berliner Luft. The Arthur Archives miniseries is dedicated to our generous super patron Bryce Godmer, who we will make disappear slipping away in a thick cloud of mist,

disappearing in the same way they lived, simply and quietly. We will make Bryce resurface as the owner of an independent bookstore in the small French seaside town of Merville. We hope you enjoy this first episode of the Arthur Archives. Gå inn på min kanal. Dear friend, how are you? I hope this letter finds you well. We have never met, of course. Our lives are separated by oceans and by time. You are just a random person discovering a message in a bottle. Yet, I find myself desperately wishing you well.

Hmm. Curious. I am truly concerned about your well-being, though I don't even know if this bottle will survive or reach anyone. Hmm. We arrived yesterday. My friend Carl... No, hang on. I've got to get used to that. My friend Kozlovsky and I. Phoenix Island. The most remote shores we could find.

And that's literally all it is. A shore. When you walk up shore, you immediately find yourself walking downshore. And you're at the seafront again. You've slept here for one night. I say slept. I lay wide awake, shivering and twitching. I couldn't decide if I was

actually cold or if I just had ants in my pants. At one point, I thought an ant had crawled up under my skin. I slapped it and slapped it and slapped it, but then Kozlovsky held me tight and said it was just a dream. I wasn't asleep, though. Then he fell asleep. I thought a thunderstorm was coming, so I woke him up.

But as soon as he woke, the thunder stopped. So, now I have renamed him Pyotr Snorslovsky. There is no shelter, no trees, no nothing. It's terrifying and beautiful. Like the face of God. The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven.

That's John Milton, Paradise Lost. Ah, me miserable. Which way shall I fly, infinite wrath and infinite despair? Which way I fly is hell. I myself am hell. And in the lowest deep, a lower deep still threatening to devour me opens wide, to which the hell I suffer seems a heaven. Paradise. Lost. wide, to which the hell I suffer seems a heaven, paradise lost. Two words that seem very outdried now. Well, Milton also wrote, better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven, and we are the

masters here on Phoenix Island, that's for sure, though without anyone to reign over. Oh, rain, rain! What I wouldn't give for rainwater! I drank Juva breakfast and ate a leaf, which I had to spit out again when my tongue started swelling. Compared to the lobster pancakes and pineapple eclairs the Surrealists served, the menu here is somewhat lacking. My distant friend, can you advise me? How do we get customers now that we are hidden behind God's back? Kozlovsky brought a radio, but I don't see how that will ever work. Who will know to radio us? And worse yet, what do we do when the battery runs out? I'm setting up camp. Kozlovsky claimed he can make electricity from a potato. I laughed in his face.

I shouldn't have, really. He has been known to work miracles. That said, we don't have any potatoes. We escaped Germany. The threat of the Nazis was a rude awakening. But I think who we really escaped was ourselves. Kozlovsky insisted we swear an oath. We admit to ourselves that we both suffer the ills of addictive personalities.

We promise ourselves never to lie to ourselves again. Sure. I'll take it seriously, Pyotr. I promise never to get addicted to anything ever again. How's that for you? Wait, what about food? Every human being is addicted to food and water and shelter. I mean, some addictions are just human nature, aren about food? Every human being is addicted to food, and water, and shelter. I mean, some addictions are just human nature, aren't they?

No, I take it back. I promise never again to get addicted to anything that starts with the letter C. There, that's better. No, wait, that would include champagne. Never mind, third attempt. I promise never again to get addicted to anything that starts with the letter C-O. No, no, no, no, no, no. That would include cognac and Cornish pasties and confit and confectionery. No, no, no, no. Good. Well then, fourth attempt. I will never get addicted to anything that starts with the letters COC. That feels safer.

That would exclude... Coco. Good riddance, I say. That yucky puddle water. If there's one thing I will never get addicted to... Yes, I think COC is safe. Wait, oh no! Coconut! Damn!

That's the one thing we might be able to grow out here. Fine, I give up. I promise never to get addicted to cocaine ever again. There you go, Pyotr. That'll have to do. How long will we be here for? Will the Brotherhood of the Phoenix ever rise from the ashes?

Or should we change our name to the Brotherhood of the Bar-Tailed Godwit? Or the Brotherhood of the Wandering Tatler? Or the Brotherhood of the Laughing Gull? Or the Brotherhood of the Lesser Noddy? Or the Brotherhood of the Laughing Gull. Or the Brotherhood of the Lesser Noddy. Or the Brotherhood of the Masked Booby. Oh, I wonder if we can eat any of those birds. Anyway, thank you, my mysterious friend, for reading my words. Writing to you helps me sort out my thoughts and let go of my worries.

It is a therapeutic thing to do, tossing a bottle out to sea, just like I used to do back in my seafaring days. I can't remember when I last watched the sunrise. And the sunrise out here is spectacular. The warm orange plume of the sun fanning over calm blue water like a peacock's train on fire. An endless horizon. Promising us... Well, nothing. Really.

But also not threatening us with anything. That has to be taken into consideration, too. Yes, just... calm. Please write back. I'll be looking for your bottle. Yours, Sir Hubert Arthur Hathaway III, Phoenix Island, Pacific Ocean. Right.

Yes. Sand in there. Aha! What? Is that? Who wrote back? Oh, that was very quick! Ha ha ha! Ah, yes, I'm very confused.

Um, this is obviously from someone else. What are the chances? Let's see. Oh, this is very exciting. Good Lord, this bottle is old. Oh, the paper is very frail. Let me try not to break it. Right there.

What? But this is... What? What in the world? Welcome to the Brotherhood of the Phoenix. What? The Brotherhood of the Phoenix. We hope you enjoyed this mini-sode and thank you to all our patrons for making the Amelia project possible. All future episodes of the Arthur Archives will be available only on Patreon.

If you'd like to join our Patreon community, help fund the show, and get access not just to the Arthur Archives, but also a big catalogue of bonus content such as the Alvina Archives, Alvina's First Christmas, the Amelia Advent Calendar, as well asogue of bonus content such as the Alvina archives, Alvina's first Christmas, the Amelia Advent calendar, as well as all new bonus content, head over to ameliapodcast.com, click on support the show and sign up from the $5 tier. Every contribution really helps with keeping this show going. This episode featured Alan Bergen as the interviewer. It was written by Einstein Ulzberg Braga, with music and sound design by Adam Raymunder,

editing by Philip Thorne, graphic design by Anders Pedersen and production assistance by Marti Partival. And it was dedicated to Bryce Godman. © transcript Emily Beynon