The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - Big Tweaker Energy with Jamie Kennedy
Episode Date: March 16, 2021From Scream to Romeo + Juliet to Bowfinger to Malibu's Most Wanted, this week's guest is an outright entertainment legend. Trixie & Katya are joined by actor, comedian, and screenwriter Jamie Kennedy!... The three showbiz souls put their brains together to solve social media, decide that Clubhouse is not a thing, and reminisce about the glory days of the 90s when the term, "followers" meant creepy people that would actually follow you around. Also, Katya learns how to lease a car. It's truly magnificent. LAST CALL is available in theaters, on demand and digital March 19th! Last Call trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSYt0Gtnzgs Follow Jamie on Twitter: @JamieKennedy Follow Jamie on Insta: @TheJamieKennedy Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To listen to our podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TBATBYT Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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I am Trixie Mattel.
I couldn't agree more.
And I'm also Patya.
And today we have the distinct pleasure of having, is this our first heterosexual guest?
I am, first of all, I do not believe in labels.
I don't believe in labels, honey.
I don't see that.
I don't do that.
But it is our first, I believe, accomplished Hollywood actor.
A straight person is just someone who hasn't seen the prom yet.
Actually, I watched the prom and it turned me straight.
Oh, word.
It was so gay that i said no
i don't want that i'm not that gay here we are hi jamie welcome back yay we had some previous
technical difficulties and we've we've grown and we've worked through that yeah here we are in the
drag industry we call these testicular difficulties yeah yeah yeah yeah we were just introducing you uh you're probably
the first is this the first heterosexual person we've had on the podcast hey i'm not going to
assume i'm not going to assume his preference but yeah i think so sir you you've never had a
hedge throw i don't think so so i'm like uh i'm like a gold-plated guest.
Is that what they call it?
You're a diamond in the...
Pearls before swine or whatever they say.
You're certainly one of the most decorated Hollywood icons.
I'm so happy you reached out.
We have Jamie Kennedy here, everybody.
Woo!
Thank you for having me.
How are you doing today, Jamie?
I'm really good.
I actually just opened this up because I spilled coffee in between our mixed stuff.
Oh, perfect.
In a white outfit, it's over for you.
I know.
Pre-Memorial Day.
Oh, my God.
You're semi-new to the podcasting
world yourself too, right?
Ish.
I started in 2017
and I did a little bit, but I got
so busy and then
it's a lot of work. And then
once the pandemic hit, I'm like,
I just really got to do it.
And I just look at a podcast now
like a Twitter handle or instagram
it's just another you know thing of who you are and um so i've been doing a pretty consistency
for them you know do you ever do you ever like i don't know sometimes i i there between the various
forms of social media and then the podcast and other like um and especially because
we often do uh forms of media that basically just show ourselves not characters really or acting
sometimes i just want to say fuck all of this and go live in a hut in like siberia yeah you
ever want to live in a hut in siberia definitely the hut not siberia probably like you know fort myers somewhere down there
you know a little tiki hut a little rom action you know i mean definitely it's
it's like overwhelming on you gotta post here and i gotta add a tag and then i gotta do a link
and they gotta swipe it up yeah and just when you have a handle on one,
they invent a new one.
And then it's also like,
I know clubhouse.
I've been in clubhouse.
It's like,
I can't sit here for five hours with this conversation.
Okay.
How many cancellations are going to happen?
You have to explain to me what in the,
because I got invited by my friend in Spain to join clubhouse.
And then she described what it was. And was like that sounds like it sounds like a nightmare what is it
nightmare what everybody's on it now all the influencers and people so i mean you did have
elon in there mark zuckerberg and everybody else and basically get invited like i didn't get
invited by like four or five people and i was still in beta
but basically so you guys you're having a pod about something and all of a sudden you have
people that are watching so you're on stage and maybe you'll have one other person you're just
talking amongst yourself and then you'll have an audience of like 12 people. And then you can say, hey, there's Priscilla. Let's let her come up.
And then she may say something to you.
The thing is, though, people stay on it for hours.
And they say shit.
And they forget they're talking.
And now people are recording those combos and putting them on YouTube and going, oh, so-and-so is on so-and-so.
And here's what they said.
It's a wrap.
That sounds like a cancellation. That sounds like a cancellation.
It sounds like a trap.
I think it's a trap.
It could be like a trap.
It could be like what they did.
Oh, that's interesting.
I mean, think about it.
There's another one going to come out now,
and I just forgot the name of it,
but it's going to come.
It's going to be another version of it.
Oh, my God.
I mean, that sounds like someone who,
it sounds like a tabloid
reporter was like, how can we
leverage people's
narcissism into a surefire
way to get them to say shit
that they won't cancel or whatever.
As if we need any more.
Wow. Here's what else
is happening.
I don't know. i assume your hours are bizarre
right like i see like especially this one every every night i feel like i wake up between three
and five i know i know it's like the witchy now but i feel like it's been happening a lot right
and you could go on clubhouse and it'll be packed with people just talking. Do you know how loopy
you are at 3am?
That's totally tweaker.
I was going to say,
that is big tweaker energy right
there. But it's
not. It's all types of industry
and people talking.
People are up at 2am giving
oratory
speaking.
And they're talking in different industries about music,
about comedy, about fashion.
You can just listen.
It's great.
I am so glad that this was not around
two years ago.
Oh, gosh.
This is something I would do if I'm alone
and I'm in a fit of mania.
I would get on and be like, I'm in a like and I'm in like a fit of mania I would get on like I'm gonna give a lecture on physics totally
to people in Germany oh my god
I never took a physics class in my life but I just stream
of consciousness you'd be on a bender like I'm about to
let these children I haven't
y'all wanna know about quantum theory
here we go and then it would just before you know
it I'm like you know that's really
frightening that's but it's popular
are me drunk ranting about
my family it's so and anderson i think this is anderson horowitz is a big like investment firm
up in tech in the valley and they are like once they invest in something it's like supposed to
be the next so now it's everyone in la i know who is you know quote-unquote influentials on it a lot of
people in silicon valley is on it and i think it's just normal people are chomping at the bit to get
in there it's crazy i have to i mean i have to you kind of hit your first like big few hits when you
were at an age where now to be that age and like be famous you have to be plugged into every platform at all
time yeah or they're not interested which is fascinating like you don't really have an option
to like break through and not have instagram now yeah i guess so yeah no way it's like you they
look at you now how many followers i had an actress tell me recently she walked in and the
casting actors like how many followers you got what's tell me recently she walked in and the casting actor's
like how many followers you got what's your collective count and like this girl who's not
that known in mainstream but is huge she's like well i have eight million and all the group like
literally three girls got up and was like bye i picked this left and it's a big deal now because
i was you know you were reading for a part with these girls.
No, the 90s was the
last, like, I believe, mainstream.
You know what I mean? And now
it's been disrupted,
which is great, you know, because everybody
deserves a voice and everybody can be
creative and there's a lot of great stuff coming out
of the new forms of distribution.
But, like,
you know, we had the video camera so that was a big thing in the 90s
but you could like get the tape and like throw it out if there was something weird you know
but now it's done it's a wrap like people are just taping, snapping, not disappearing, vanishing.
I don't text anything I wouldn't say in person.
Oh, that's good to live by.
I mean, honestly, like, people now have to start doing stand-up
constantly, like, knowing that that moment could live forever,
I guess, out of context.
And I guess before it was not the case.
Yeah.
We were just talking about, we had shows we can't even count on like shows being not pirated like stand up being pirated
the second you think of something brand new set you're trying out somebody tapes it and puts it
out there and it's like well then you go to a show and your fans have already heard it
oh it's it's it's yeah there's no gym anymore unless you like shut down the cameras and that's just harder to do. You have to just make peace with it. You know, it let's try to, you know, this person didn't mean that or whatever.
Not now.
We just live in this new culture where they're like, Ooh, get that person, take them down.
It's just, it's an interesting, it's a large time.
It's a wrap.
It's a done zone.
So when I was probably going to have you, which I'm so happy you're here, I have to
ask you, you know, this one and I work in an industry where everybody has an alter ego. We have a fake personality. I have to ask you
about a certain Marty Powers. Please tell us about Marty Powers. A hundred percent. He didn't put wigs on though. It's a different alter ego, but, uh, he was fabulous. But, um, no,
it was basically like, you know, I was, I was starting out.
I was very broke, you know, as we all are.
And I was working as a telemarketer in Hollywood,
not too far from the seventh veil, you know, like that, you know?
And so it was like, we would go and we were selling seventh veil you know like that you know and so it was like we would go and
we were selling toner you know toner is this stuff you put in coffee machine there was an unsexy job
and i was well i was getting it depends how you really i was where you're at
but so i had to basically call different cities and try to basically find out the copy machine.
And that's how the people would sell.
They would find who's in the office.
So I'd be like, I'd be like, hey, Mabel.
Hey, how are you?
This is Phil down here at Copies R Us.
And basically what we're doing is I need to find that copy machine.
So what's it say on it there?
I would have to call.
I've called all over the country
so let's ask context i'd be like hey how are you maybe uh this is jeffrey down here top guitar us
and basically i need to get that popular number on that machine you can get in there and so she
would go all right let me go get that for you and it would be like ft 109 and that would be like a
cannon or something and uh basically I would then find that number.
And then I would go and give that number to our salesperson, and they would try to sell
them a better tone. And that's basically how it started. But I would call Brooklyn and
be like, Hey, how are you? You know, I would call a lot of places doing a lot of different
accents. And that's how I got to do it with Marty. And so I looked at myself as a product.
I read a book called Think and Grow Rich.
And then basically told me how I could do it and basically how to treat yourself as a product.
Take three no's, hang up, all of that stuff.
This is the Jamie Kennedy School of Acting.
Oh, my God.
How to sell yourself.
Yeah.
Yeah, you got to.
Well, here's what you would do, right?
You would look at yourself and you would say, name five people in your industry, okay?
And look at five traits that you feel that you're better than them at and five traits where you can improve it.
So whatever you're in, I would look around at people that were very successful or just getting TV spots.
And I'm like, well, I did a gig with that person last week.
I got people to laugh.
So I think I'm good looking, if not better.
I'm very physical on stage.
You know, I would be like, I would break it down.
And then I would be like, I have to do this.
So you build this confidence up.
You know what I'm saying?
Confidence.
So Marty Powers was your fake agent,
basically. Marty power was a character that I did. And
basically, in a nutshell, it was I'm trying to do it here. It was
the very, it was an older character. I it's harder to do
it because I don't really have the microphone. And what you would do
is you compare things. So back in
the day, I would say, yeah,
I had a kid here who was a cross
between Robbie Benson
and James Woods.
And that was a guy you
remember Robbie?
In the early 90s, that was
a good mix because it was like lovable puppy
dog, but like a littlegy, a little psycho.
That's how I was doing it.
Oh my God. That voice, I believe
that voice.
You should be like, everyone shut up. It'd be a house party.
Everyone shut up. Turn off the music. It's for Marty.
Hello.
That's a really smart
idea.
I think that's a thing
if you're starting out and you say my call my office or whatever your answer
is like hello this is dr jason's office i can connect you right now you do that and then there's
like an air of legitimacy is is conveyed right when i first started selling my own merchandise
i sold it myself and i was touring at the same time so i'll be gone for weeks and then the emails
will start to roll i'm like where's my shirt and i had a steven from my merchandise which was me answering emails yeah and then if they were really mad i
would chime in for my real email and personally apologize and they'd be like it's okay i'm such
a fan yeah i think it's important a lot of people you have to who's giving us a break
yeah yeah and also sometimes you in the beginning.
No one wants you in this movie.
Especially when we watch you, but we need you to have credits.
It's like, well, no one gave you a credit.
So then you don't have a credit.
So how do you get a credit without a credit, Mary?
Or Marty. Exactly.
You have to be co-signed.
Someone else has to like you first.
And then you get the tape.
And then the tape goes.
Yeah.
Totally that. Yeah. to like you first and then you get the tape and then the tape goes and yeah totally that yeah
no i mean what's i i i want to talk about auditions because i went like i've i've only had a few
auditions for like you know teeny small acting roles and almost i think every single one of them
was absolutely terrifying horribly um like and i just i mean they were so bad like it was bombed so bad i mean and i like
i can oh in the best circumstances i can like act pretty decently well but like
what was the worst audition experience we've ever had
you guys have seen the face it's like it's like how much time do you have
um hey i mean that's like i wish i prepared for that i'm sorry can i ask you i'll ask you a
version of that go for it i'm still thinking i'm thinking of a couple but go for it okay you've
had like the privilege of like having the script in your hand to
audition for so many movies,
like Clueless,
which is my all time favorite movie.
Titanic,
of course.
Is there anything that you were like,
I would have fucking nailed that.
We were standing outside their house,
like you're making a mistake here.
I'm getting Marty.
You know, I really, you know,
I did a table read for a movie called Saving Silverman.
Do you remember that movie?
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
With Jason Biggs.
Yes.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
It wasn't a huge movie,
but it would have been a great breakthrough for me
as like a beginning starring role.
And when you do a table read it kind of
like green lights the movie you know so the director was there who directed it to dennis
duke michael keaton was at the table read jack black steve zon i think jason no jason lee was
there so some of the actors that were in the movie were there and some of the actors weren't there.
And I really wanted that role because it was like,
and Amanda Peete, I believe, was his girlfriend.
I'm not sure if Mena Suvar was in it,
but it was just a fun little comedy.
And I really, I did so much preparation in the reading of it.
I thought, oh, I hope I could get that.
But you do table reads, you really want to get the role.
In terms of movies, shit, I'm trying to think of a movie that I was really up for
that you would know that I didn't get.
I mean, I'm trying to think of like –
There was a movie called The Big Hit with Mark Wahlberg.
That was a great movie, and I was in that movie,
but the schedule didn't work, so I couldn't do that.
That was kind of the problem.
Because sometimes I feel like you do leave with a feeling like,
I really am good for that.
You know what I mean?
You leave with like, ooh, I would be really good for that.
I think I really should have been Troy.
I thought I had the same type of chest
as Brad Pitt, but you know, I understand
they wanted it. I mean, yeah.
Yeah. That's kind of it. I tried out for
Rose McGowan. I could have been
soldier number six, neurotic. Come on,
Troy, what are you doing?
I could have played woman number two.
I would have been a great
to know me in showgirls.
I have the same body.
I have exactly the same body type. I could have been a great to know me in show girls. I have the same body. You have the same body.
I have exactly the same body.
I could have been Gina Gershon.
Do you like the movie show girls,
Jamie?
Of course.
Show girl.
You don't even know my connection with it.
First of all,
well,
the show girls is like coming around.
It's kind of this like beautiful piece of pop art,
right?
I think it's getting the appreciation it deserves. and at the time i think it was misunderstood i think
it was over the top it was meant to be um and i was just talking to one of the actors who i love
robert davi who was in it and he's got one of the most craziest i don't know if i could say it on
the pod lines in like cinematic history. Is it in my hard way?
He's what?
Which line is it?
I mean, can I say it?
Hopefully a bit.
He's like, look, you know what?
And if they don't come in, something about it, they don't come in your face.
You know, you got to ask what?
Something literally he says that.
And that's a big I was a huge like
what the hell I mean I'd be a big line today but back then it
was crazy and that movie is one of the movies that Randy quotes
he says you know you know absolutely brightening and
screen tools you know show girl and now I think that people are
I don't know I've been hearing a lot about showgirls lately.
I love showgirls.
I do, too.
At the time, I watched a documentary or something.
At the time, I feel like Gina Gershon knew.
During filming, she knew what was happening.
You think?
No, no, she knew.
She said that she knew this was camp,
but other people did not.
Like Elizabeth Berkley.
So like, you know, there was a lot of like,
there was a realization on her part of like,
oh, I know what kind of movie we're making here.
But other people involved didn't.
And like Elizabeth Berkley just went for it.
And then it was panned.
But it is one of the most watchable movies I've ever,
you know, in terms of quote unquote bad films. Totally.
It is so gripping, so entertaining.
Every scene is.
Yeah.
It's big.
It's bold.
It's loud.
It's over the top.
It's sexy.
Yeah.
It's in your face.
I love it.
And the dance scene's been real good.
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I have to say when I first saw that movie, I didn't know that people thought it was bad. I was like, Oh, that was that was a
cool movie. But I understand that gay people might have a
proclivity for the over the top. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Also, it
really fucked Elizabeth Berkley up for a long time.
Yeah, I listen. I'm not one to comment on it because I wasn't in it, and
I know how hard it is to make a movie. I
like the movie. I'm saying that
some of the reviews might have been a little
harsher, but I think it's coming around
now as this big
kind of shining light of art.
Like you said, it was big
and it was bold and it was
cabaret-esque.
Yeah, yeah.
Paul Verhoeven, his movies are incredible. Total Recall, I mean, and it was bald and it was cabaret-esque yeah yeah total like his pauper hoping is so like his
movies are incredible total recall i mean so wild so wild and over the top i mean also maybe she is
so fucking hot in that movie yeah but like purple makeup with like i mean her body is insane insane
totally insane yeah that pool scene the sex scene in the pool.
Yeah.
Crazy.
So crazy.
Also that she and Gina Gershon talking about doggy chow, you know, how they used to eat
dog food in this like, you know, lesbian erotica like moment in Vegas talking about dog food.
I mean, it's a little over the top.
Whenever I go to the mall in Vegas, there's that, what's it called?
The mall there.
They're eating at the food court in that mall. Whenever I go
through there, I think of like, we're all whores, darling.
Yeah.
I know that mall
has like show in it.
Yeah, what's it called? It's called like,
oh God, people are going to be mad at me over it.
It's called like,
isn't it like an Egyptian theme?
That mall? Oh,
the Egyptian?
I don't remember.
Anyway, I always think of that scene.
Yeah.
Do you like Vegas?
Have you worked in Vegas a lot?
A lot.
I love Vegas.
You do?
I'm all about it. There's actually a whole other subculture there of like Summerlin and Henderson that's off the strip.
It's really healthy and you can like work out and play golf. But I
love the strip too. I'm all about
eating a buffet.
Yeah, I will say
that was at Bacchanal. That Bacchanal buffet
is lit. It's insane.
Top five.
It's gotten reviews like
worldwide. It is worldwide.
It's incredible.
What is it called? The Bacchanal? The Bacchanal. The line is
hours. You have to get a good player's car.
But the food is amazing.
I don't give a shit
what kind of food it is. I'm not going to wait
hours in line. Well, what else is there to do there?
You don't have to. You can get in with
a VIP car or something, but
every type of food,
Michelin star chefs. It's incredible.
Yeah. Dessert day.
Even just like desserts alone is worth it.
Yeah. Jesus Christ.
It's really fierce. I mean, I did go
the first time I went to Vegas, I cried
at the Fountains of Bellagio.
Because they told you no swimming.
No, because
the water, and then Sarah Brightman was playing, and I cried. I have a was the thing, you know, the water,
and then it was Sarah Brangham who was playing, and I cried.
I have a question for you, Jamie,
that I'm kind of asking all the comedians.
What's going to happen when we all go back to the stage?
Like, do you remember your sets at all?
Yeah, I mean, I've actually been doing it slowly.
We've been playing, like, parking lots and fields.
Tell me everything. Mountain valleys. because i have talked to like i was talking to whitney comics about this and she said it's a different experience
out there with people in their cars and stuff oh it totally is you get a honk and you're like
headlights um it is different it's nothing like the human interaction obviously but
i would say yeah i mean i've been writing some newer stuff and mixing it but no i can't remember
half of it and just you'll be amazed though how many people really do they're so appreciative
so crowds are very and less offended you know so they're much more like oh thank you and it's
therapeutic you're gonna realize how therapeutic it is for you when you do it you're gonna it's
you really do count your blessings not to sound like corny yeah that makes sense it feels like
there would probably be less like more of a a grateful element in the audience and make perhaps
less hecklers once things come back to like normal or whatever yeah i mean at least i hope yeah yeah for sure it is it's it's it's they there's enough
to worry about to not worry about a joke but i'm sure there's going to still be people that do worry
about that besides there's cars out there if they say they see something they don't like they'll
just put it in drive and take you out you drive off you know what's crazy is I did the Roosevelt last week.
So they've been doing these shows in the parking lot.
It was great.
But like the first, it looked packed.
And then I realized the first three rows were like the active cars.
And then the last three rows were just parked cars.
Like, no.
No, I thought I was like killing in the first three rows i'm like the last three rows
hates me but i'm like oh nobody that's fucking funny they're just abandoned vehicles that haven't
run in years they just told you there's people there oh my god you could do like a cemetery set
with people just perched on individual gravestones you You know what I mean? Well, they do those movies in the cemetery, right?
Yeah, they do.
Don't they?
At Hollywood Forever, I think.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They do.
They do.
Have you been to those, Jamie?
I haven't.
I'm supposed to go because Scream was playing a few times
in different movies I've been in, but I haven't.
But I heard they're amazing.
They're these big, like, inflatable, you know, movies.
Doesn't screenplay,
but probably semi regularly there.
I'm sure.
I mean,
it's,
if you're going to sit in the,
if you're going to sit in the graveyard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Can I,
can I ask you a ghost question?
You get good residual checks from that movie.
Those movies from the show goes from scream.
Oh yeah.
Do very well. He's got an assistant and
he's got i know i know i'm just curious though i'm just curious i get i did one enterprise and
enterprise you know what i have is enterprise is a great program where you can rent a car for a
monthly and it's a better deal and that way i'm trying to figure out what car I'm going to get because my last car was done pre-pandemic
so that's what that is
and so I have different cars every month
you got to give us some car advice
yeah we want cars
okay well hold on
I was Ubering so much
and I was out of town so much that I was like
I had a car and I never used it
well that's the thing
and so then I sold it and I was like I don't need a car and now I had a car and I never used it. Well, that's the thing. Yeah. And so then I sold it and I was like, I don't need a car.
And now I need a car.
And so I don't know, do you want to buy one?
You can buy one, but it's like a depreciating asset.
I want to steal one.
It is a depreciating asset.
But wait, let me, so if I have a car and I don't use it, do you lose it?
car and i don't use it do you lose it it's not like it doesn't like atrophy necessarily the same way a person's muscles would if they were bedridden right like i'm not i don't have to go
wash the sores and like you know but like i know that if i left it alone for 10 years something
bad would probably happen maybe i don't know yeah it would just get outdated you know and they're
updating them so quick now.
And it's like it is.
They literally say, well, you drive a car off the lot.
You basically lost money.
Yeah, it's like you'd snip a hole in your pocket as you walk away.
You've had some hot sexy cars, I'm sure.
I know when you did Scream,
didn't you buy yourself like a retro Porsche or something?
Close.
Did you have a fancy car?
Good research.
My first big purchase, I took pretty much my whole paycheck, which was about $18,000,
which is a lot of money.
It's still a lot of money.
Yeah, that's a lot of money.
I went and I bought myself, it was like 18 and one I made on the movie and the car was like 18.5 and so i went and
i bought a bmw and it was like they used but it was like a stick shift it was like a 328 it was
like a little off 325 and it just zipped everywhere and i told my mom mom, I'm like, Mom, I got my first purchase out of Hollywood. She's like, What'd
you get? I'm like, BMW 328i, you know, stick shift and she's
like,
I just Joey car. Mr. Show off. How'd you get a BMW? What is
wrong with that?
What's wrong with an Acura?
Show off.
It pissed me off. I was like,
screw you. This is what I want.
You know what? Let me tell you what, moms.
You're never going to get
the reaction you want.
You never get, whether good or bad,
I bought my mom a house this year.
My mom
rents a trailer in the country. I bought my mom a house this year. My mom rents a trailer in the country.
I bought her a $250,000 four-bedroom home in Milwaukee.
Cash.
Your parking lot shows are going good.
It's that sick podcast money.
But, you know, I bought this house for her.
My mom rents a trailer in the country i bring
her there she goes they look bigger in pictures do you want to move back to the trailer mom is
that what you want yeah but long story short what state is she from she's from here wisconsin
so she was lit oh it's cold yeah she's like oh we don't have gluten yeah beer beer battered
cheese curds in a cold in a trailer and you get her a house and she's like she's like it has
stairs you don't have good knees how am i supposed to get down to the day i'm like i'm sorry your
house has so many floors i'm over here in my 1200 square foot you know hollywood pad but anyway moms will
never give you what you want but i will say i read that on screen too when uh your character
rest in peace passes away your mom was on set that day watching you get brutally murdered
i this is all facts um yes that was actually a beautiful moment if you can make it one um
because i had like the whole afternoon
It was just me, you know what I mean
And so I had the killer
And he's stalking me and all the different angles
And so Roger, who's awesome
Who's Ghostface
Is like, he's really
He sounds really scary
So Wes gave me a phone
My mom and dad were visiting
And the stuff that he said to me
during the scene is not what's in the movie and um was he trying to make you laugh you know he
could say stuff and i would be like weirded out and he would i forget he says a couple personal
things whoa and then and then he said your mother your mother is next to me.
And I remember my mom was like there.
And Wes didn't tell me where he was.
I didn't know where the tent is, where you're looking, where the monitors are.
And so I had no idea.
And I'm just looking around.
So when I'm looking, I'm actually looking.
I'm like, Mom's there?
Like, what the hell?
I thought she was shopping.
And so he
he got me good he got me good i would love it if he had some personal issues he wanted to work out
before you left and he was like and i always thought you were really short and your mom
thinks your car is showing
the stick shift how you think you're hot shit.
Do you think I could learn a stick?
How long does it take to learn a stick shift?
I know how to drive technically.
Like, I mean, I could get, you know,
I could drive a mile without killing anybody or myself.
I'm pretty confidently,
but I have no idea how to learn a stick shift.
How long do you think it takes to do that?
And is it worth learning at this point in my life?
I'm over 40. i'll take my answer i i think we're all not going to have to drive
soon even cars are gonna be picking us up uh but you know you go to target parking lot it's not
hard a couple lessons yeah it's basically like this here's your foot here's the stick right so as
imagine it's like a gripping thing right so as you're push that in and the car won't move
so as you let your foot you put the thing in so it's like boom boom first then slowly let the
thing out and as it goes, it will catch.
And then you'll start zooming.
And then as that's coming, the pedal is going.
Does this make sense?
Yes.
So you guys are left on the gas, right on the clutch? Left on the clutch, right on the gas.
But don't, you take the gas, you let it come out slowly.
And then you give it a little bit of gas
let me ask this in a parking lot and then when it goes can we get you to commit to giving us
two to five stick shift driving lessons yeah the target parking lot why are is why would people
why why why why why do people drive standard uhissions? Is it funner?
Is it more fun?
Is standard a stick?
Stick, yeah.
You mean stick.
Oh, because when I had my BMW, I don't know if you guys remember the 90s in LA.
I don't know if you were around then.
But everybody had the BMW and the Porsche.
And there's something about like, well, it's still bumper to bumper.
But now it's all different.
But when you're going over
the 405 you know you can really open it up i'm not even a car guy but a beautifully car a european
car is so beautifully made and it's not to sound like a car head and i'm not but it's tight so it's
like you can really feel the power bmws are so good so the stick is good for like really kind
of airing it out,
if you will.
Okay.
I feel like that,
like top down California dream and zoom,
zoom lifestyle.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Totally.
I could teach him.
You know how to drive a standard.
I do not believe you.
In the country.
It's like all the big trucks are stick.
Yeah.
I've only thought about it because like,
what,
what if,
you know,
I'm driving somewhere and get in a car accident and somebody is like, you know, unconscious dead and I need
to drive the car to the hospital or something like that.
You know, there's so many scenarios.
But you used to have a license, right?
Yeah.
I have a license.
It's just expired.
I know how to drive.
Right.
But I have no idea about the stick shift.
And I, but I see, I know dumb ass people, people who have, I mean, close to like, you
know, Neanderthalqs who do drive very well
with the stick shift so i have a i have a certain level of confidence i could learn it yeah it's
just a couple of moves you could do it easily we're dreaming big you want to you want to do
it just because you're scared of an accident jeez put those thoughts out of your head yeah
um do you think that leasing the car i I'm sorry about the car talk. I really am.
But should I lease a car?
Is it worth it to lease a car?
This is so funny.
You're our only strength for us.
Please help us.
Please help us.
Dad, dad, please.
And I'm not like a gearhead or anything.
Yeah, but like in this group, you are the gearhead.
You are need for speed, Fast and the Furious.
Also, we should thank my brother for his birthday.
I'm trying to impress this girl.
Does he manscape?
Jamie's like, get him a manscape.
Use my code.
Use my offer code.
I don't think you should buy a car.
Just lease a car. Just lease it? Okay.
We have a fine.
I'm from LA.
No, I'm from Boston.
Yeah, so you, I, it's, so you, yeah,
you're like me, you took the subway.
So you didn't need to drive.
Yeah.
So we gotta get a car.
You gotta get a car.
Cause even right now you want to sit in an Uber
with somebody, you know, a little dicey.
You can't get a car.
Because even right now, you want to sit in an Uber with somebody, you know, a little dicey.
Oh, boy.
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What kind of card do you want to get?
What's the vibe? Okay, I found
it. It's a small, it's a Range Rover.
It's a Range Rover,
but it's not the... Oh, the little baby ones.
Yeah, it's called the...
They're awesome. Something cute.
Something, something, something cute.
It's a baby Range Rover.
You know how Range Rovers are kind of giant?
Yeah, and the Land Rovers are tall.
They don't have a lot of headroom.
I still like such a car head. I swear
I'm not a car head, but the way you ask
me these questions, I just know these cars.
They're small, but they zip.
Like you don't want to go to Tom's Range.
Yeah, the Land Rover Evoque or something like that.
They're good for those trips.
Yeah, because if I'm going to get a car, I don't want like a Miata.
I need to have a lot of shit.
Although I don't want to have enough space to have to drive people around.
Oh, I don't want to ruin my car.
Sorry.
Plus for you, situations might change where housing becomes an issue.
Yeah, maybe I need to live in the car for a few weeks.
Yeah.
She wants to get a
fucking
vintage Beetle. I want to get a Beetle,
man.
Listen, I make a lot of choices
that Bill makes. I've owned a smart car,
so I make a lot of hard left choices.
It's a go-kart.
Imagine me, Jamie,
pulling up to the gay clubs in 2012 in full drag, 6'5", blonde hair, getting out of a clown car.
And because that car was so small, I could pull up to the gay club, back up against the curb, and that still fit, like the parking.
Wow.
Crazy.
Wow.
Did you do that just because that's what you could afford you wanted to make it
an entrance well a i thought it was cool and b at the time a brand new smart car was like
twelve thousand dollars so i a broke person could afford like a brand new car yeah i could never
dream about affording a car ever and those cars are made with 96 recycled materials isn't that a
gag it's a gag it sounds over by a Volvo on the highway.
It was cool.
I mean, for me, I was like, I'm never going to have kids.
I don't need to know who's back there.
But it did have a weight limit, and I loved my roommate.
My roommate was a really big guy.
And it is a 500-pound weight limit, and I couldn't get him rides,
which was a gag.
And that was my out.
Can't.
Sorry, fat.
I can't give you a ride can't yeah it created some friction
you know jamie we have a crossed wire um because we're good friends with darren stein
are you yes we know her we love her she because because she loves drag
wait do you know what's funny i don't know if i could say this you just reminded me that
darren is gay correct yes i almost forgot wait james asking if darren stein who wrote jawbreaker
is gay i was like did he did he or did she come out in between i I'm like, oh, I think she was. Was he maybe not out during Sparkler?
No, definitely.
Definitely. But I just, you
just reminded me because it's been a minute since
I did that movie. But I think that movie
is kind of an iconic
movie in the gay community.
It's very hard
to find.
It is, but I believe that Darren
just got it on
I want to say Netflix.
And DVD.
He recently texted me like, if you come over, I got a copy
for you because he says it's really hard.
The hard copies are really hard to come by.
Wait, where?
I love Darren.
He's such a good person.
Such an icon.
That was my
first time in Vegas.
That was my first time
being a co-lead.
He took such good care of us.
It was just with Park
and with...
Oh, God.
That was pretty early for you, too. It was early in your career.
Yeah. It was just... we had so much fun.
That was like a family, you know what I mean?
That set.
That's awesome.
How do you guys know each other, I guess?
Oh, I met him at DragCon.
He was at RuPaul's DragCon.
It's this big drag convention.
And he came up to me, and he was like,
Hey, I know you've talked about interviews,
your favorite movie is Jawbreaker. I made that movie and i was like and then he actually hosts these big rupaul's drag race viewing parties at his house he has
this giant projector and he has all the gays and he hosts big oscar parties too but um yeah he loves
to watch the girls back in the day i don't know if he was married back then
or the boyfriend i don't know to a woman i haven't seen him in a while and you worked with veronica
car right in that movie icon yes incredible incredible she is and sandy sandy too icon
veronica icon we are so obsessed with her.
We are obsessed with her in Witches of Eastwick.
She's so fucking good.
When she's possessed puking up all those cherries.
Yeah.
And then I played her. I was in a music video with Veronica.
I know. So good. She was so...
What music video?
It was with this band
Deep Valley and in the video i played like a um
what's her name the young girl that the the pageant girl who was killed jemini i played
like a john bonnet ramsey like a drag queen like a and she was my mom and the whole video we're in
this trailer park and i'm tap dancing and she's like cracking the whip and then she's feeding me baby
food and then at the end we're in a trailer
and she strangled me with Christmas lights.
It was
so surreal. I'm like, I'm
calling my mom like Veronica Cartwright is strangling
me today.
But I love her. What song
was that? I think I heard that. I think I saw
that video. Well, Darren actually directed
the video. Darren Stein directed it. It was Little Baby Beauty Queen, I think I heard that. I think I saw that video. Well, Darren actually directed the video. Darren Stein directed it.
It was Itty Bitty Beauty,
Little Bitty Beauty Queen, I believe it's called.
I think I saw that video because I remember
the Christmas lights dangle.
The Christmas lights dangle. Do you miss the
blonde highlights and sparkler?
Be honest.
Do you know what that's from?
That was from As Good As It Gets
and I was in that movie.
And then I had blonde highlights.
And then Darren liked it.
So he just kept it.
And so I went over.
But yeah, I do.
You're cute.
Do you miss the pink hair from Romeo and Juliet?
Do I miss the what?
The pink hair.
Oh, I wonder if people realize I feel like i kind of started that because we were in the
movie and and baz is like what do you want to do and i'm like you know this we had all different
palettes of different looks and i was like you know i think i gotta go i gotta dye my hair first
off and i wanted to do that he's like i think you should do it with kind of plum
and i'm like since there's going to be so many different colors and loud sounds and music i'm
like what about pink and he's like yeah it's weird it's really fierce people doing pink and i'm
wondering if that movie inspired them yeah the upkeep was probably kind of a but it is cool
here's what it is cool.
Here's what it is.
You start with the blonde,
you put the pink in,
it gets real vibrant, and then you have to do
like once a week
just to shape up.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
You actually,
so you have a TV credit
that I think is probably
my ultimate dream role.
A satanic,
cannibalistic killer.
Oh, God. It got the um oh god criminal mind typecasting yes if i can do it i mean like that acting it is like i mean to tell a priest i i don't know i think i've got it right
to tell it to be questioned by the police and then to tell a priest that you've served him human soup at a,
or something like that.
It's like,
it's so good.
He gets,
I mean,
he gets like apprehended in his underwear with like,
in a,
there's like a small,
tiny,
a dingy room with a bloody pentagram,
sex symbol.
Yes.
He'd be sexy.
I was like,
oh my God,
oh my God.
It's like my boner city.
And then like,
it was just so, I mean, I would die to play a role like that.
Was it fun doing that?
Yeah.
I mean, you know, Criminal Minds is one of the coolest shows to be a part of. And it's a show that's given a lot of actors that don't normally are known for that type of role.
Jason Alexander, Frankie Munoz, James Van Der Beek. And I had to go in. actors that don't normally are known for that that type of role jason alexander um frankie
muniez james vanderbeek and i had to go in i mean and i was like starring in movies and stuff but
i still had to audition and i was just like more than happy to do it and i you know the creator
was in the room he's like he's like he's like man dude that was really good he's like i'll see you
on set tomorrow at 7 a.m and i was like and I just knew it would be a different look for me, you know,
and to be able to do that, it's based off of some kind of case.
And it was less is more, you know, when I put those glasses on,
I had that beard, I didn't have to say that much.
I knew.
And then it ended up being like voted like a top 10 unsub.
And I was like,
Oh man,
which is like what they call creeps on that show.
So I was happy.
I made a list.
I love it.
Well,
it must be so fun for like,
to be able to like go completely bat shit and be yourself.
Let it all out.
But before we let you go,
I have to ask you,
I have to ask you, I love the movie bowfinger so much and when you were standing there with i mean all these icons were you like this movie's about to be
that bitch because that movie is so funny and every time i watch it i find something new
eddie murphy in that movie is really like two completely different people.
It's incredible.
Multiple. He played multiple characters.
He played his movie star
and then he played his brother.
Yeah, I mean
that was a different
super college. I didn't go to college.
It was like a beautiful summer
school college. It was like 16 weeks
in the summer all la
icon here steve martin icon here eddie murphy icon to you know and the making of graham
icon over here christine baranski you know it was just different walks of life and i was like
smack dab in the middle of it and i was just like kid in a candy store and
frank also icon you know directing it and he's miss piggies yoda yeah multiple things and also
ron howard and brian grazer produced it so it was i was so lucky and it was yeah every day it was
like school and it was just shutting out all of la you had to have known that it was so funny you had to
have been like people are gonna fucking die from this it is so funny yeah it's crazy because it was
like it's i think it's like really people really love it as an underrated gem like it came out it
did okay my box office wise but people love it but it's like yeah it's definitely lived on in its way
but i it was when we were doing it i was like it was crazy it's amazing, yeah, it's definitely lived on in its way. But I, it was when we were doing it,
I was like,
it was crazy.
It's amazing.
Well,
thank you for letting us harass you on our podcast.
Where can people find you?
Um,
I,
so I appreciate this so much.
Uh,
you can find me on Instagram,
Jamie Kennedy.
I have a podcast.
Hate to break it to you.
I was far by iTunes,
Twitter,
Jamie Kennedy,
all the usual spots.
And I appreciate it.
Sorry we had so many false starts.
No, it's fine.
I really recommend people go to your YouTube and check out the video on why celebrities go broke.
I know.
I listened to it this morning.
I was like, fuck.
I'm doing more like that type of stuff of behind the scenes of like what it's
like. Cause people ask me so many questions and it's like, it's true.
It's not just drugs and alcohol.
There's a lot of people that get their little grind.
Yeah.
Steepo does similar series.
Steepo does kind of similar series that I really enjoy where he's just hand
looking right at the camera being like, this is it happened yeah i love it yeah that's good yeah
that's a that's a wealth of knowledge steve-o too so and of course he's like stapling his face to
stuff you know you don't have to go there well thank you so much thank you so much.