The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - The Official "The Dolls are the Dolls Fan Club!" with Trixie and Katya

Episode Date: February 13, 2024

Do you love Trixie and Katya with all your heart? Would you like to find a club of other humans who share your affinity for these two remarkable queens? Well now you can! Sign up for the official "The Dolls are the Dolls Fan Club" to join an elite group of fabulous individuals who are super-duper extra special! Exclusive membership benefits include: An official non-laminated "I'm a Doll" Membership Card that could arrive in the mail, or maybe not! An annual newsletter written not by Trixie or Katya, but by someone! A unique email forwarding address: . An "I Play with Dolls" bumper sticker for when you take your kids to the local playground! And for a limited time, all "Elite Cadet" members get a lock of Katya's hair! All you have to do is send in a self-addressed, stamped-envelope with seventeen General Mills proof-of-purchases to: Dolls, LLC, PO Box 666, Aurora, CO 99991. Don't be a sad loser for another minute! Join now! To try the #1 Meal Kit for eating well, go to https://GreenChef.com/60BALD and use code 60BALD to get 60% off, plus 20% off your next two months! Visit https://LELO.com now for exclusive discounts on luxury intimacy products, and use code BALD10 at checkout for an additional 10% off your purchase! DRIVE AWAY DOLLS is only in theaters February 23rd. Visit https://DriveAwayDollsMovie.com to get tickets now! LISA FRANKENSTEIN is only in theaters February 9th. Visit https://LisaFrankensteinFilm.com to get tickets now! Pure For Men is the brand for good health and good times! Made by gay men for members of the LGBTQIA+ community. Get 20% OFF with promo code: BALD20. Head to: https://puremen.co/baldandbeautiful Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatya.com To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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where we offer career programs purpose-built for you. Visit continue.yorku.ca. Chapter 44, Alyssa Edwards. Do you know this one? No. Oh! Chapter 40. Suitcase full of dreams? No, this is chapter 44.

The newest revolving around the sun 44 times, Alyssa Edwards. Fierce. Every time Alyssa Edwards goes around the sun, times, Alyssa Edwards. Fierce. Every time Alyssa Edwards goes around the sun, the world gets bigger and brighter. Yes. Girl. She looks like cuntaliciousdiva.com. Cuntaliciousdiva.com.

She delivers. She delivers. You know some, they say don't meet your idols. Meet Alyssa. Meet her. Meet Alyssa and you go, wow, the screen, the silver screen didn't even come close to capturing it. Not a fraction. Not at all.

Chapter 44. There's a few like that. Bebe's like that. Bebe's a Harbinet. Bebe's a Harbinet. It's like, it's sort of like, oh, you love pasta. Have you had homemade? Like meeting Bebe in person is like homemade Bebe.

It's like, oh, bitch. Ravioli? Talia tele. Yeah. Get on a tour bus with Alyssa Edwards. I would rather not. Do it. I would rather get on a private jet with her.

I want all the divas. I want Alyssa. I want Bebe. I want all the grand dames on a tour. And I want to be the tour director. I want to be the tour manager. Who are they? Let's list them though, because there's Alyssa, chapter 44.

Yeah. Violet. Okay. Right. Girl, we're going in. Let's go. We got Viol got bb we got alissa um also trend the trace lisette a post-op transsexual with a bangkok pussy her words not mine i swear to god you're don't shoot the messenger no no shoot me i'm the messenger

shoot in me you know not on the tour You know? I have family staying with me. Talk about it. It's great. Yeah. It's great. I love, I've never, I've never, never, never had real bona fide space for guests. Oh, you've got space. Having guests when they have their own rooms, their own bathrooms. It's really no big deal.

It's cunty. You're not, like, it's great. Having a dining room that can seat everyone. Like, having guests when nobody has to sleep on a couch is, like, it's so nice. I don't know that life. I didn't either. Because even here, when I had guests, it was a pullout. Which is fine.

My mom was always like, wow, this is a really comfortable pullout. The pullout technique works, too, when you're trying to get people not preggo. Ask my mom. Pullout. Ask my mom. About pulling out? I have so much to talk to you about that I feel like I'm just going to throw up Do it now

I'm listening Let's get it percolating And some days the sun starts to peep out And I get a phone call from you And you go I can't wait for the pod I can't believe it's in five hours You'll be like I can't believe it's in five hours. You'll be like, I can't believe it's four hours to 11 when I have to talk to you.

One of us will always be ready to rock it. And I just feel edged. I feel edged. Intellectually edged. Verbally edged? A woman on the edge. Like for real. I have a nervous breakthrough. For fucking real girl. Chapter 44. Go. Not the chapter 44.

We haven't even talked about the Kardashian girl. Chapter 44. Go. Not the chapter 44. We haven't even talked about the Kardashian girl. Malibu. No, no, no, no, no. I love your glam. It's not glam. It's natural. Is it organic? Yeah. Not the organic. Not the organic.

Not the organic. Yeah. Why would you? I totally have a skincare line but it's I gave you I mean I was talking to my sister

and I go I literally said do you know that girl from TikTok that and she cut me off and goes the one with the post-it notes on her fingers

and I was like how did you know I was gonna say that Mary she's diet you know what you know what is so diabolic about her

she does these brand integrations she doesn't get paid a lot I know but how do you know? Well, I know. I got intel. I got intel. Celsius

doesn't pay nobody no well. It's fine. But she looks like a Kardashian, talks like a Kardashian. She synthesizes the whole Kardashian drama into sponsored videos. She distills it. Yeah, so we don't have to watch those whores. i would i

would but you know they're kim kardashian mama goddess oh yeah of course but i even love you know i don't know how to say this um in a nice way it's sexy uh even kim and them 15 years ago gorgeous like yeah money and more surgery etc don't forget, these women always look pretty amazing. They were. Are they Armenian? Well, that helps. By the driver today, Armenian. I mean, he said, you know, well, that doesn't make sense.

There are a lot of beautiful Armenian men in this world, bitch. Oh, my. Let's count them. Chapter 44. You want to talk glossy, thick eyebrows? You want to talk perfect skin? Perfect eye color? Like bushwhacked booty holes, though.

Got a laser, laser, laser. Not for me. Not for me. Not for me. For who? Chapter 44. I want chicken wire. Girl, I want scrubby. Not the chicken wire.

Not the scrubby. I want a scrub daddy. Not the Thanksgiving Express. Not the Thanksgiving Express. Can I talk to you about PT? Part-time work? Or physical therapy? Pootie tank.

My brother and my brother's wife are PTs. Talk about it. So I think last time I was on the pod, I talked about my arm. Did I talk about my arm? Your arm? Your elbow? So if you're all watching at home, this arm straightens this much and this arm wasn't, it was like this. Locked. Locked. I went to a PT

and I kind of like thought it would help. He helped me so much so fast in even one session that I almost started crying and hugged him. That was for my arm. Did you pay him though? No. I'm just kidding. Yeah, of course.

Shit. But I went to PT somebody for my TMJ because I mean a couple weeks ago my mouth would barely open. That's how bad it's been. Oral sex no more. Yeah. I mean i could maybe folate a peanut m&m at this point but you're allergic to peanuts well it's a risk i'm willing to take it's an sacrifice you're willing to take what if i talked to it's a week i'm willing to

take chapter 45 fucking nut in me i want to have an allergic reaction in my lower colon, baby. Anaphylactic shock. Wait. Who listens to this? Okay. Mama, people who want to die. So something happened. And I don't want to get kicked out of my doctor, but I wanted to say what happened.

I feel like there's a doctor-patient confidentiality. The Hippocratic Oath. So something happened and I don't want to, I don't want to get kicked out of my doctor, but I want to say what happened. I feel like there's a doctor patient confidentiality and I do think as patients, we should have the freedom to say what happened at our doctor's appointment, but I don't want to like overly share people's practices. We just don't, don't give the name. Trade secrets. Okay, great. We're going to call them Dr. So-and-so. Dr. Doctor.

Dr. Monica DeMonaco. Yes. Okay. Easy to say. So I go in there and you know, I'm telling him about my job being locked up. It's Dr. So-and-so. Dr. Dr. Dr. Monica DeMonaco. Yes. Okay. Easy to say. So I go in there and, you know, I'm telling him about my job being locked up. It's Dr. Moon. It's Dr. Moon. Perfect.

So he's like, get up on the table. Super helpful. Works on my elbow a little bit as a, as a, as a little pro-am race for the cure. Like, like we weren't there to see my arm and I mentioned my arm and he did a little bit on it, which was so welcome and nice. Not that we should expect healthcare providers to put in the extra other body parts. No, ma'am. But it was nice.

So he starts working on the jaw. He's explaining it to me. He's feeling all over my head. And he's basically like, okay, your jaw is supposed to be an even hinge that goes up and down. One of your sides is recessed. So the whole thing is off kilter, which is why like when you chew and talk too much, it creates problems for you. So he gave me exercise to do. But Mary, you better believe he had to put on gloves, reach in my mouth with both thumbs.

Both thumbs in my mouth. Both of those thumbs? And I'm just going to say he wasn't unattractive. Dr. Moon was hot? He was very handsome and professional and nice and helpful. Thank you, Dr. Moon. Calming energy. I had some and professional and nice and helpful.

So thank you. Dr. Calming energy. I mean, for a doctor to put their fingers in your mouth and for you to not feel weird and embarrassed, I felt very relaxed, chill, but he goes,

all right, we're going to get your job in today. And I was like, okay. And I kind of like, didn't believe them. I'm getting hard. He goes,

we're going to get your job opened up, which any other context, you know, but this is a medical environment, you know, this is a medical bar, you know, I, by the way, would you have gagged if he took like an x-ray of my head and says, have you been sucking cock?

Is that what happened? Yeah. So he gets both thumbs. Both thumbs are up inside my mouth. And he goes, you can bite on my thumb. So I put pressure on the thumbs. And then he uses the pointy part of his thumbs to start pushing into the soft tissue, my hinge joint. And he's looking out into space because people who do body work, they almost look away from your body to like visualize your skeleton while they're doing it. Massage people sometimes

like look, look out into space while they do it. Yeah. It's a little horny. Yeah. So, but it wasn't too horny, but I was thinking like, wow, this is intimate. Somebody's thumbs in your mouth is intimate, Not in a sex way. No. So I don't want to get kicked on my doctor. No, don't do it. Because I was completely professional. Dr. Moon is up there in orbit. Right.

I think it's okay to acknowledge that in other pretenses, this could be the beginning of porn, but this currently is doctor. Well, I watched a porn that started like this. Right. So then he's pushing the thumbs and he's pushing the thumbs into the soft tissue and basically prying my jaw open. And he's taking breaks and he's going, are you okay?

Are you okay? And he's prying, prying, prying. The terrifier? Pretty much. And he's like, your jaw will shift one way really easy. And the other way it's so locked up. I can't even push it the other way. I mean, it's so bad, but he got it open a few more millimeters and I was able to eat

this week and chew with like no clicking and popping and no major pain. And I'm seeing him again tomorrow. And I'm so thrilled. I was like, do you think we'll be able to, after a few visits, you think we'll be able to get it open? He was like, Oh yeah. Which was so comforting for Dr. Moon. Yeah. But you know, in other contexts, beautiful doctor, thumbs in my mouth, eye contact saying we're going to open it up. I'm like, Oh my God. I watched a pornographic film this morn that involved a man putting his fingers in another man's mouth. And you know what happened? S E X. Thank you. Doctor of dental surgery. But I was just so grateful. I mean, to have, to go to a doctor, you know, so many times you and I have talked about going to doctors and leaving with no information and no help.

I would have been leaving with a titanium? Done by a robot through a computer? Hello? I was talking to somebody recently who's getting a surgery, and I said, you know, my friend got a hip replacement. Don't go to Snibby, baby. Go to Mexico. I said, my friend got a hip replacement, and I think her only regret is not doing it sooner.

And my friend goes, well, I had a hip replacement nine years ago, and it still hurts. And I went, okay, blue. Yeah, okay, blue. I was like, damn. Not the nine years ago and it still hurts. And I went, okay, blue. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Blue. I was like, damn, not that we're not the nine years. Not the nine years ago.

Yeah. I just was like, well, fuck not the bum hip. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. She says,

oh my gosh, court. Oh yeah. Chloe does. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Not the bum hip. Yeah.

Do you know, I have so much to talk to you about. I'm listening. I'm listening. hip. Yeah. Do you know, I have so much to talk to you about. I'm listening. I'm listening. What does possible sound like for your business? It's having the spend to power your scale with no preset spending limit. Redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit amex.ca slash business platinum. Turn off hesitation. Turn off doubt. Turn off fears.

The YMCA of Greater Toronto helps you turn off whatever's holding you back so you can let your potential shine. Turn on confidence. Turn on connections. Turn on possibilities. There are hundreds of programs and services available at the Y. See what you can achieve at YMCAGTA.org. This will be the day. Do you know about what's going on in the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City? Not a thing.

I won't dive in. Does the girl do them too? No, she does Kardashians. I won't deep dive because I consider each one of those women friends after filming with them. They're all nice and sweet. We can't drag them through the mud then. We're not going to drag them. But a very unique situation happened that I want your perspective on. Talk about it.

So it's a cast of women. There's a new gal this season. Mormons? Some are Mormons. Some are ex-Mormons. Some are practicing Mormons. It's like a mix. That's a fucking fierce mix.

It's a mix. That's a mixed nut variety. It's part of what makes salt lake city so intense is some of them are mormons some of them aren't some of them used to be mormons some of them are maybe blurring the lines and you know let me stop you right here for a moment let me talk to you a little bit about mormonism it's crazy continue yeah as they all are but mormonism is really on a special level mormonism scientology two sides of the same coin. Not joking. Well, I told you about them telling that the Mormon women get told their secret name through

a curtain. Habibi? Habibi. Exactly. Yeah. So apparently what occurred, and I watched this, cause you know, I don't really watch the Housewives, but David watches about 12 hours a day at Bravo. So I catch it in the morning.

I catch, I get involved. Whether you like it or not, when someone's watching this stuff in your house, you get involved. You're complicit. I was leading the witness. I was led by the witness. What happened was one of the new cast members who I filmed with this year and everybody was so nice and normal. No, it was

Mary Cosby. She's a friend of. Gotcha. Friend of Dorothy? She used to be on the show but now she's a friend of. Which is what happens when they don't want to do it anymore But they'll still do guest spots Tip spots Tip and wigs What about a wig company we just sell tip and wigs They're like not that good

Tipping out with bobby pins Nodding out with bobby pins So One of the women She signed on as a housewife this year and they filmed a whole season with her and by the end of the season they found out that she was one of the owners and operators of a real housewives fan account what she had owned she had been one of the original posters and owners of like let's say there was like an rdr rdr super fan rumor website like lee dawson for example yes she was posting she was one of those people who ran

that account trolling and they found out the other woman found out and the other one were like so you run this account that calls us fat or calls us ugly or like and you've been doing it since before you're on the show i'm starving feed me feed I'm starving. And it really created a major rift. And it made me think like in drag race world, if you were on a season of drag race and you found out there was a girl the whole time leaking information about us or starting and perpetuating rumors about us or like running, would you be mad? No, I'd say that's chapter 44, baby. Would you kind of like be like, girl, whatever, that's your little hobby

Or would you be like, I don't trust you Well, that part, of course But I don't think I would really involve myself with that person I would no longer be involved Yeah, because my thing is also like Well, didn't everybody want to be on TV? Like, all of you All of you did this because you saw Housewives at some point

And then Housewives came to your city And you said, sure But see, my issue is Why why would you, my issue is with that person, not a character assassination, I'd be like, well, this is the way that person chooses to spend their time. I don't agree with it. I don't necessarily like it, but I'm going to keep doing me. Miley. Right.

Like, what would you do if you found out I ran a, like a Trixie and Katya fan site? I'd be like, where do you find the time? That's impressive. Yeah. I'd be like, where do you, do you not sleep? That's fierce. I just, I have no opinion one way or the other. I just thought it was really.

It's cunty. If you found out after a whole season of something like Housewives 2, where it's really about your, people talk about your family, your body, your face, your career, your money. It happens on Drag Race Girl. It absolutely does. Yes, it does i mean i haven't been watching drag race i'm not not because i'm not gay or don't like it but just because i don't have i do it at the time i don't know why i'm not watching it but i it's girl it's

off the chain this season well plain jane gets me together plain jane gets me plain jane gets the girls together whether they want to hear it or not she's like so i noticed you're really ugly plain jane literally is like hey girl i know i know that you haven't spoken to me and this is completely unprovoked. You're not on the same level as the rest of us. And plain Jane is fierce. Sorry to say, I'll look into this camera. She is fierce.

Plain Jane, not because she's from Boston, not because she's of Russian descent. Plain Jane is fierce because she's fierce. Boop, boop, boop. And you and I are always like,

where did this rule come from? That drag Queens have to be nice. It's not the Miss America pageant. Honey, I was, I saw a clip of myself on Hey Queen the first time saying, um, that is saying exactly that. When did it become de rigueur? I don't even know if that's the term.

For drag queens to be politicians, heads of state, to conduct themselves with the behavior of a beauty influencer microscope. Drag queens are typically drug dealers, drug takers, the prostitutes, hookers, thieves, or at the very, very most selfish cunts who want a drink ticket. Thank you. And attention. Gay as hell. If you put on the sheen little bodysuit, you will get into the club for free.

Yeah. You smell like pink sugar. Maybe you can wiggle. Maybe you can't. It doesn't matter. But you're like jumping into the cash industry using a fake name. And you're humping and grinding on bachelorettes on Saturday night at 7 p.m. You're not a notary public.

No dignity. Chapter 44. Yeah. And you're poor. What is chapter 44? And you're poor. Alyssa Edwards' 44 journey around the sun. Oh, right, right, right.

I'll show you the photo because you will fuck it. She's chapter 5150, bitch. Honey, you will fucking gag at how beautiful. You cannot take this. Nobody can. Is it the one with the mirror? You can. Yes, sweetie darling.

Yes, you cannot take chapter 44. You cannot take her i'm sorry this is taking too long it's right here yeah the mirror oh yeah i seen it girl i sent it to you oh shit well how do you not i'm gonna read it because every time she posts one of these life posts it's a chapter yeah cheers to chapter 44 a testament to the chapters of the life i have lived. I am grateful for all of your kind B-Day messages and love. I have embarked on this journey around the sun. May I never forget to dream wide awake and unconditionally celebrate the reflections of life. Always and forever, Alyssa E. Cunt.

Fierce in love, Tyra. It's cunt. She's cunt. Yeah. And she looks great. She looks incredible. Melissa Edwards. Melissa Joanne Elizabeth Edwards

Etheridge the third I was talking to Ganja Pussy that's how she is on the phone and so she's been on her hormonal journey of course and she's like I looked at some clips of her and I called her and I was like

mama the body yeah she was more of a sapling build. And now she's a little more of a. She's a curvaceous, cunty diva. Body like, wow, pussy about to end this drought. Say it again. Yeah. Yeah.

It's fierce. She's always fierce. Well, she's always been fierce. But, you know, to see her publicly and, you know, from my little perch, like kind of, uh, grow into a version of womanhood that she wants to. It's truly breathtaking. Cause I mean, she has all the skills. She's had all the skills from day one.

Yeah. I love when I'm with the girls and I'm like, Oh my God, your skin, what do you use? And they're like hormones. And I'm like, okay,

but give me some information I can use. I'm not willing to go to that length for perfect skin. Well, I think like misery, I might take this advice at 50. If I don't have a husband, which I won't. I'll become the only transsexual. So you'll have to wipe out all the other ones? Is that what you're saying?

No, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, that's a good point. I'll become the only. There can only be one. Like Highlander. No, you're going to go to some young, beautiful, content trans woman's house. You're going to pull out your arm, cut the skin off like Terminator 2, and pull out your robot arm.

I watched that movie the other day. I sent you some clips. You did not, but it's okay. Yes, I took the video of when the... What did I send you? Total Recall. Quanto lives. Get your estimos. Let's go to Saturn, Doug.

Do you think I'm gross if I would fuck Arnold? He's hot in those movies, right? He's hot in those movies. Speak on it. I would fuck... He's been one of my Spank Bang top five for my whole life. Gorgeous. The scene where he is about to cut off his robot arm

and he pulls up his shirt, the bicep, the... He's not a bad looking guy. He's a great comedic actor. You have to watch... You've got to watch his Netflix documentary the three episode truly fucking fascinating well did you see

the new Terminator Genesis the one with him in it again no I didn't like it but wait wait does that mean you didn't see before you forget

Reg Park you know Reg Park I've been posting about Reg Park he was Arnold's idol from the 1958 at Hercules Reg Park is the hunk of all hunks. If you saw this man on the street,

you would crumble because he makes Arnold look like a fucking dog. Work. Reg Park, South African, I believe, or British, British. Love the name Reg.

Reg. It was Reg the leg. His, his nickname. Mama, this motherfucker climbed up on top of me. The littlest dick you ever seen in your mother. No,

I'm just kidding. He is so hot. I've never seen in my life ever, ever a hunk more hunky than this man. So Arnold saw him in Hercules and said, that's what I want. And I'm going to surpass it. And he did. Wow. I believe Arnold.

I don't know why I know this. I believe he made popular the ladder reps. Did he? Yes. Less reps. And then I think he did a lot of reps at less weight. And then the next set he would do less reps, more weight. Less reps, more weight.

It was like a ladder. Oh, okay. Interesting. I mean, he revolutionized bodybuilding. Yeah. He did the whole book, the Bible book. There is a Bible of bodybuilding written by him. And he won so many competitions it he's his he had a brother who was gay and died in a drunk driving accident he he's so there's so many incredible things about his life

now he please aren't even good drivers sober thank you you know tell it thank you tell it thank you maria shriver dog But he married into the Kennedy family. And it's really interesting to see that, you know, he sired a child with a maid. Oh. Yeah, fierce. But he, you know, he fucked around a lot. I mean, he's Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Yeah. You know, I was watching it with David. We were talking about it with David's mom. And she was like, Arnold? Really? And I was like, maybe gay guys like him. And do the straight girls like him too no right everybody they did because i think he's handsome lies yeah he's beautiful he's also when i was a kid i just had never seen a man like that and i was like oh my god mama he we factored into our lives very young because my my father and my

brother and my my uncle tom was a bodybuilder at the ins. And Arnold Schwarzenegger was always in the mix. Yeah. Terminator, Predator, Total Recall. Yeah, I mean- Kindergarten Cop. Especially in True Lies, it's not like Terminator where it's like almost like- I'll be back, three words.

In True Lies, he's just hot. It's not like novelty. He's just a handsome man. What about the tango with Jamie Lee Kermis? Girl. Girl. She goes from housewife to bombshell in one whop. She doesn't even get her hair changed.

Well, nothing gags me more. If anybody has not seen this, there's a scene in True Lies where she's going to do this mission. And she has on this crazy frilly dress with glasses in her hair. And she stops and looks in the mirror in a hotel. And she takes the glasses off, puts on lipstick, pushes her titties up. She rips the frilly sleeves off and then takes a vase, pours out water, slicks her hair back. The princess switch.

Yeah. Which if I ever start getting surgeries, I want to get enough that that's all I need to do to get in drag. How do I, what's my morning routine? Rip off half my outfit and put some water in from my hair. No kidding. Well, that's drag race. Girl. That's drag race How do I, what's my morning routine? Rip off half my outfit and put some water in from my face. No kidding. Well, that's drag race.

Girl, that's when the girls can't sell on drag race. That's what they do to an outfit. Girl, you got to watch this season. It is off the chain and I,

I'll get to it. I'm doing pit stop. So I obviously have a unfair advantage. I'll watch you do the pit stop. You look great on the pit stop by the way. I got to show you something.

Thank you. This person called Queen of Flips, whose name is Maya Iman LeLepage. This week, she it was a Cher competition, and she did a Cher impression. Would you like to hear it? I would. I'm going to show you Reg Park, too. Are you ready to hear Maya? I'm ready.

Let's go for it. Can you do a Cher impersonation? Let me see it. Oh, I saw that! Braces! Braces! The meme that'll live forever Do it again Do it again Do it again

Yeah do it this time But lick your hair back I'm great I'm great So we're trolling What share is that? So we're trolling We're doing troll Tina

And that's coming from me That's coming from my share Which is Used to be the worst But now I'm the second worst Look at this motherfucker Girl Mama Look at this motherfucker Girl That's coming from my share, which is used to be the worst, but now I'm the second worst. Look at this motherfucker. Girl. Mama, look at this motherfucker. Girl. That's Reg Park, bitch. Girl. Honey. Girl. You think that's the hunkiest man I've ever seen? It's true. Girl. That's Reg fucking Park, bitch. Sweetie darling. Sweetie darling tootsie honey baby. He looks like a

circuit DJ. He would be headlining at circuit party. Which circuit party would that be? Wait, wait, wait. The Circuit City Party. Wow. Beautiful. Travelocity, this is Susan. Girl. Beautiful.

Mama, when I tell you that I've downloaded this movie on YouTube, Hercules and then Hercules and the Haunted Mansion or whatever, the two of them, and it yanked and pulled the taffy so fierce. Queen of Faps. Queen of Faps. It's Faptina Bestie. Faptina! And it's, none of it, it's all, they're all practical.

There's 1958, this movie, Hercules. Yeah. 1958. The sets are incredible. Is that before steroids? Oh, no. No, oh. But get this, though.

They pray, they're fighting Uranus. Uranus. They're fighting Uranus. The planet. No, the god. Uranus. The amount of times Uranus comes into play dialogue-wise is not

lost on me because I would love him to fight my anus. I want my anus to come into play. Girl, and it's all it's Hercules so it's gay, homoerotic. Greek, the mythology of it is so homoerotic I can't even stand it. It's so fap-worthy. Wherever you can find your joy in life, because let me

tell you. It's PG too. worthy Wherever you can find your joy in life It's PG too I feel like I woke up from a dream And had a reality check Really? Chapter 44 I beg to differ Chapter 41

I feel like you've always been so In touch with how Not good things are And I've always been like but they are how not good things are. And I've always been like, but they are. But lately I feel more like, no, they're not. And you're right. Wait, wait, wait. You gotta be more specific. I don't understand.

That's it. Chapter 41. The script is flipped. I've always been more of like a realist or like very optimistic realist. Life is whatever. Lately I'm just like Take a, give me a break. Where's the Kit Kat? Where's the Snickers?

Lately I'm just like in the moment, if it's right to you, do that. Are you feeling like Peggy Lee, is that all there is? A little bit, yeah. A little bit. When my house burned down, I wondered,

is that all there is to a fire? Fierce. Let's take a break. Okay. The final seconds of the game separate true fans from the rest. The fans that are there for every victory, defeat, agony, and ecstasy. And when the buzzer sounds, you deserve a Coke Zero Sugar. The one with irresistible taste and zero sugar. Win or lose, Coke Zero Sugar is the most refreshing way to end the game. Coke Zero Sugar. Best Coke ever.

Learn more at Coca-Cola.ca. When things heat up, you don't just want a cold one. You want the coldest one. The cold-loggered, cold-filtered, cold-certified one. Mountain cold refreshment. Coors Light. The chill choice. Visit CoorsLight.ca to learn more. Celebrate responsibly. Must be legal drinking age.

Viewerslight.ca to learn more. Celebrate responsibly. Must be legal drinking age. Something uplifting. People's houses burning down. Mine did when I was growing up. My sister dropped a candle on the bed and the whole upstairs went on fire and we lost all our bedrooms. My parents and I and my brother and sister had to sleep in the basement for two weeks.

Have you told me this before? Probably, but years ago. Your house burned down? The whole top floor. All our bedrooms. The fire department came and everything. Yeah, I was- Oh my God, mom, dad, brother, sister, gone.

Here's the company fire department and police policy. Corporate errand. It all comes back to corporate errand. Lisa Beasley. Lisa Beasley. So did you, was it at night? It was at night. I, this is going to sound morbid.

My only, my deepest, was I filled with relief or regret? Right. Relief that none of my family members were perished. Regret that I was not there. That I was at my friend Kristen's house, the same woman who fucked my, this guy that I introduced her to that I was in love with, stole her from me, stole him from me.

He was straight, but he let me give him a blow job. Tea with braces. Hello. And I was at her fucking crazy house while my sister dropped a candle on the bed. It went up in flames. The whole upstairs was blackened and charred. Not the house in flames.

Not the charred house. Not the charred floor. Yes. And then the fire department was there. It was a big neighborhood disaster. And I came home and I was like Well The one cool thing finally happened

Thanks Kristen I blame it on her I wish she would have been there That would have been so fun for you It would have been fun I would have been terrified Because my sister is traumatized That's traumatizing

That's actual trauma That's actual trauma So she what? Like Do you know What's her Because she tell you like With the current events

What happened? She dropped a candle on the bed and the bed went up like gangbusters and she didn't have a fire extinguisher. She flipped, she was like 12. It was absolutely terrifying, terrifying. And then the guilt. Was she home alone?

No, everybody was home. So she just starts screaming. Screaming and then it got out of control. There's nothing you can do when the whole room is up in flames. And then it went into the fire department had to smash through my window. This could have been like her X-Men origin story. She like controls the

flames and it's all okay. It is, but she became a veterinary pathologist instead of a fire breather or whatever. What a waste. I know. So stupid. And a master's of public health? What a loser. What a fucking loser. Flop. She needs to get on your level. I mean, yeah. She had a child who sings himself to sleep at night? Loser. Get over yourself. She texted me.

Owen was in the bed alone singing, ba-ba black sheep, have you any wool? He sings himself to sleep. The angel sings himself to sleep. Well, you know, that's what the kids used to do. Now that, you know. Oh, there's woke. Well, now it's like iPad children.

Mama, nary an iPad. We were juggling scarves. Honey. We were playing with trains. We were putting on chapstick. I used to take cherry chapstick and put it on my wrist and pretend it was perfume. That was my life. Swatch it.

Chap it. The original swatch. Love it. Hey, guys. I didn't have a camera yet. And YouTube hadn't even invented, but I was doing beauty videos with chapstick. You're also accosting people outside with perfume. Definitely.

Like, hi, I'm from Macy's what's that doesn't matter David had a similar thing this morning I woke up And went to go get dressed and I heard him in the shower And he's showering And I'm putting on my clothes and I hear Was he rubbing the skin on you? No I hear Something's bound to begin

It's gonna happen He started singing maybe this time In the shower by himself Which is an intense thing to sing in the first thing in the morning in the shower. Let me do you one better. I sang it. I lip synced it at MassArt while people ripped my prom dress off on stage. I love art.

I love art. My name is Sasha Vore. Have you heard about art? That sounds like Cher. That's Queen of Flip Cher. Wait, hold on. I'll do it with Flip. Art? Not the art. Not the art not the drag we're doing art girl what have we been up to dragula we're

going to mexico this week vamos a mexico si claro que si we're going to mexico i you know i've never been i've never worked in mexico in my life but mexico is going to work you out have you worked in mexico i have. Where? Mexico City. What's the vibe? I don't know. I was on 150 milligrams of edible. Then our manager found me masturbating in a bathroom in the dark. It's gonna happen.

Can we take another break? Two minutes later. Maybe this time I'll win. Oh, everybody loves a winner. Can we talk about Eileen? Yes! Absolutely Come on Eileen Annie

Motherfucking Hathaway I'm watching this movie Because David turned it on And I hate when David does this He goes He puts on a movie And I go What is this movie?

He goes It's a film And I go And I go What is it called? He's like You'll see He won't ever tell me what's on

So I Because he wants me to He wants to try to suck me Into watching good movies You should say he's a soap opera then. Because it's not Uncle Buck. I'm not interested. Hello.

So I'm like stuck there watching it. And as soon as it got cooking, I went, you know who's going to love this? Insufferable. As soon as it started to get crazy, I was like, you know who's going to fucking love this? Katya. And then I text you, you got to watch Eileen. I love Otessa Mafia. I don't know how to say her name.

I've read the book of my year of rest and relaxation, which is cuntaliciousdiva.com. Because she's, I believe that she, so she did also this fabulous book called Lapvona. I don't know how to say it. Lapvona, L-A-P-V-O-N-A. Fabulous, incredible, disgusting, medieval tale. And she's so good at drawing in characters

that are so unlikable, but are so, you so in compelling, but I hadn't read this one. I bought the book and hadn't read it. And when Annie Hathaway barged into that frame, I said, okay. Yeah.

So, okay. Can I, I don't care about spoilers. This isn't, I like to watch. I don't care if I ruined the whole movie for these people listening. Skip ahead.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah. Do you know about that? No. Denise Richards was on Real Housewives. She was saying she wanted the filming to stop. And she was saying blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Because if you mention production, they cut it out.

It's like Nike, Nike, Nike. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Kathy Griffin says if you're ever saying something you don't want them to use, you start singing The Beatles. You sing a song they can't clear financially. Come on, Eileen. Won't you say that? Anne Hathaway comes in.

And of course, can I just say, I'm not like a big brain movie person. So oftentimes like these sort of. You're saying you got low brow taste. Yes. These sort of cloying. I don't know if that's the right word. Like Oscar bait movies tend to grate me. Yeah, I understand that.

They tend to make me look around. It was like the Saltburn experience where after I looked around and went, is this what all you faggots have been tweeting about? I know. Have you all seen Uncle Buck? Where's the entertainment? John Candy. How are we going to make this funny? Thank you. So the movie

kicks off and it's kind of slow. Massachusetts accents are crazy, as you know. It's kind of slow. My ear was not. Sheary she shoved snow in her pussy yeah that was crazy yeah my ears can't understand that mass accent it's just wild well i wasn't in massachusetts in jail in the 50s but but it gives me p-town townie level accent when i'm like whoa t t like your bra your jaw wait judges yeah is your wait your father judge is in the bathroom with a horse

that's fucking yeah it's bizarre so Anne Hathaway comes in and of course you're like okay there's this woman

she's kind of she's sex starved but obviously has no social life has no sex life has no romantic life and then Anne Hathaway comes in

who's like effortless world weary smoking indoors like well honey stick with it's very like stick with me kid and at first you're like is something lesbian gonna happen is something lesbian does gonna happen honey World weary. Smoking indoors. Like, well, honey, stick with, it's very like stick with me, kid.

And at first you're like, is something lesbian going to happen? And then something that lesbian does kind of happen. Honey. And I'm watching, I'm, I'm almost, um, what do you call it? Uh, ODing. Hard. Oh, so I'm on the couch. I'm sort of, I'm, I'm bottom, I'm flatlining.

I'm sort of like this movie just went over my head. Okay. I'm missed. I'm here with my warm, laughy taffy in my left hand and my iPhone in my right hand being like, wake me up in the credit. It's just too weird. Too weird for me. But again,

I like trash. Yes. No, no, no. Yeah. Yeah. Uncle Buck is not trash though. And then Miss,

uh, when Miss Anne Hathaway goes, can I confide in you? I go, okay, something's, something's going off. Something's going off.

And she goes, can I confide in you? And she admits to having the kid's mother tied up in the you? I go, okay, something's, something's going off. Something's going off. And she goes, can I confide in you? And she admits to having the kid's mother tied up in the basement. I go, holy shit. And newsflash, she worked with troubled kids and she's trying to get the mom to confess to not only knowing about her husband, fucking her son,

but facilitating it. Yeah. And the woman is like, when I realized he he i was getting infections in my pussy and then i realized it's because he was doing our son up the butt and then fucking my pussy with the shit on the dick mary it was i i hope you're not eating out there i it was sort of like um perked up isn't the word. I sort of was like, what's this? What's this?

There's white things in the air. I was suddenly like, oh, this movie's going off. Snow. Yes. I crossed both legs. Into the woods. I crossed this. Then I crossed this leg.

You're like, let me confide in you, Ms. Hathaway. Yes. I put on my little crocheted socks on my beret and I leaned in. I said, what is going on? Glasses on top of your glasses. The monologue the mom gives during that. I was like, this is acting. It was acting. This is misacting.

And Hathaway's doing misacting. I feel bad not knowing the actress who plays Eileen. She was doing misacting. I didn't love the way it ended. I hate weird French novel, just abrupt endings. And the next morning though, I was going for my walk and I was like, I liked that movie.

Yeah, I did too. I liked it. I liked it a lot. I was, you know, the shock of that monologue. The shock. So this is a novel, right? I mean, that is clear from the descriptions. Because you have to play them.

This sounds so fucking juvenile. It's very much a novel. Sounds so juvenile. Like, it was a tell, not show moment. Yeah. And obviously novels are tell, not show. But then you create the movie in your head. I I'm like,

now I'm going to read this fucking book because I'm going to be more haunted and more disgusted and more terrified by all the things that I'm going to have to imagine from the words. Yes. You know, I mean, and the parts that are shocking, such as that monologue,

it wasn't played for shock. It was played for. Gravy. It was played for if it's the early 60s first of all divorce for women women barely could work at that point also eileen's dad was shh-ed up in the sister yes yeah yes and then she got out and you know it's a little like the gypsy rose thing where i've been in abusive situations i understand how you get horse blinders to reality. We watched the movie and you go,

Eileen could leave at any time, but that's not how it feels when you're in abusive dependent situations. And so obviously in this film, it gets extreme the way she deals with it. It's extreme. But at the end I was like, okay, bitch,

I see you. Eileen. Yeah. I leaned over. I was like, the credits came down and I was like Dawson's Creek, like, I see you, Eileen. Yeah. Eileen Dover. I was like, the credits came down and I was like Dawson's Creek like, doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo. You were Katie Holmes marrying Tom Cruise.

No, but when it ended, it ended too abruptly for me and there wasn't a bow on it. And I was waiting for a moment where she looked back at the camera like the end of Monster and was like, what do you think? Or something like that. I was waiting for something. Annie Hathaway takes off her blonde wig. It's like, that's right. I'm Catwoman.

I knew you were going to love this Annie Hathaway. It's maybe my favorite Anne Hathaway role, to be honest. Okay. I've loved it. Annie Banani is... Annie Banani is... She's Miss Actress. She's Miss Actrina.

47 million followers on Instagram. Did you... Have you... Okay. I'm going to have... The film she's about to drop on this world with Jessica Chastain. Do you think gay people are going to survive that? What movie?

Me thinks not. Argyle? No. Oh. The one about the son. It's, what's it called? Mother's Instinct. Mother's Instinct.

Honey, you watch. Tracy looked it up right away knowing you wouldn't know the name. Honey, you watch this trailer and you will say, my gay personhood is about to be evaporated and vaporized by the country that's about to take place on screen. Every gay person is going to be like, and die. Everyone. There will be no more gay people. Do you know about headphone dents? People who stream for a living through their teens, their heads are starting to get dented from wearing headphones.

And they have a flat here, bulb here, indent here. The phone neck and then the arthritis in their thumbs. Girl. But the dent, they take the headphones off and the skull is still like, nope, we're here. Love ASMR. Miss, what do you call it?

Fontanelle. Fontanelle Dupree. Fontanelle Dupree of the legendary house of headphones. Girl. Sometimes we need to experiment with earbuds. I'm just saying switch up the headphones you wear. Also, these are very soft and lovely and they're not making a dent on my 41-year-old brain. Probably because I'm 41.

But if you're wearing it when you're young while your head is developing. Who's wearing develop? Who's wearing it? Kids literally have iPhones at two now. But iPhones, oh my God, you're right. Girl. Oh my God. Girl, my pussy, I put a Fitbit

in my pussy so when the baby comes out, it wears it as a belt. Fierce. The steps are counted from the jump. Hell yeah. One step. What do you think of those little carts that drive around, the Amazon delivery carts, the robots? You're not ready for what I think about that. Are you prepared

for me to talk? Have you ever received a package from them? Do you really want to know my opinion about this? No, I do. Because here's what I'll say. Some bullshit piece of shit motherfucker went to the trouble of inventing a robot traveling food technology while we have millions of homeless people in this town. I take umbrage with

that. That's what I'm going to say. Okay. Robots that drive food around to people with a lot of money and yet starving people. They have to jump over starving people in the street. That's disgusting to me. It's despicable. They also have names.

They have names like the cart will drive. The other yesterday. It's Molly. I was on my walk and the cart stopped and blinked at me and it said Marnie on it. And I was like, okay, Miss Marnie. Marnie from girls. I guess. Alison Williams.

I've never seen girls. So those, and somebody was telling me that people remote control those carts And I was like, how can you miss Marnie? Marnie from girls, I guess. Alison Williams. I've never seen girls. So those, and someone was telling me that people remote control those cards. I was like, what a girl? I don't know. And it's just, it's girls,

lesbian, no lesbian things happen. No, it's just girly stuff. Girly stuff's being girls in New York, rich and white. But wait, wait,

wait, sorry to, but sorry to go on a little tirade, but I, the, the, the robotic technology that is being developed and employed by people like Elon Musk, Tesla, is just so, to my unknowledgeable observant brain, asinine. Black mirror.

It's like gray mirror. It's not even like, it doesn't have the fierceness. Not even Coke. It's like a poop mirror. Brown mirror. There's poopy stuff in that mirror. Well, I just, I've never received a package from one of those. Do they go like, your food is here and you go outside and when you go up to it.

It slingshots it into your mouth. You go, chomp, chomp. Does it just open and you grab the food out of it? I've never seen it. I've never used one. I've seen them driving around, but never seen them open. Same. So there could be some kind of nefarious plot.

If you're an unhoused person looking for a meal, can you crowbar it open? I doubt it. Can you rob it? Who's got a crowbar? A lot of homeless folks I know are tired, cold, and maybe a little confused and certainly not... Not looking to fight robots today.

Not really. It's not the Terminator. It's not the Terminator. But okay, let's get back to something light. I just, I think, I just, I see them driving around and I always go, oh, they must be testing that. But now there's so many going around. I'm like, they must be using that. Somebody's using it.

And it's like the Boston Police Department with MIT technology that's robotic, like police robots. It's fucking crazy, dude. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it because, I don't know, we should be like helping people with human beings. I don't know. That's sad. It's sad.

Well, let's keep it light on the pot today. So let's talk about your drinking problem. I don't have a drinking problem. Although, do you like beer? Certainly not. I have a dream of becoming a beer person. I've drunk a Guinness. You don't like it

I love Daphne Guinness The heir to the Guinness fortune Who doesn't? Of course I mean do you Have you seen her music videos? Heaven Have you seen her music videos?

Directed by David Lush No I didn't know she did music She did and it's incredible Oh I've never seen it She is unreal The music videos are unreal Unreal Revelations I'm never seen it. She is unreal. The music videos are unreal. Unreal.

Revelations. I'm going to look it up. It's two of them. In particular, I'm thinking of. They'll knock your socks off. Guaranteed. Guaranteed. I'm going to look her up.

Yeah. David also has me watching a program with Laura Dern called Enlightened. Oh. She really eats. Oh. Laura Dern is so pretty. I know that we shouldn't. I feel like with actresses,

we're not supposed to say that they're pretty. Why not? Because then we're like judging someone's art by how they look. But every time Laura comes on screen, I go, my God, she's pretty. God, she's pretty. She's hunty.

She's diva. That Enlightened series is Mike White. It's pitch perfect. I love Mike White. I love him too. Love him. Mike White, we love you. We love you so much.

Isn't he? Of course. So he knows about the girls maybe? Chuck and Buck like to suck and fuck. Mike, Mike. We love you. He's also bald and beautiful. Is he bald?

No, he's got some hair. He's pale as hell. He's a pasty white bitch. Yeah, I love people with blonde eyelashes. It's a vibe. They need brow mascara. But I love men with like white, yellow little sticks growing out of their eyes.

Il Bwainers. Il Bwainers. Listen, but Enlightened, you've got to get, have you seen, I mean, I've rewatched Enlightened recently and,

devastating. Do you believe that a certain actress was recently denied her right to an Oscar nomination? Margot Robbie? No, nobody has a right to an Oscar nomination. Margot Robbie? No, nobody has a right to an Oscar nomination. For Barbie? The popcorn movie? I don't understand why there should even be an Oscar discussion when we're talking about Oscar bait.

Barbie? A toy movie? I love... What's next, Toy Story going to sweep the Oscars? That would make more sense to me, honestly. Is Herbie too fully loaded sweeping the Golden Globes? Can I ask you, before we equate Barbie to Toy Story, because gorgeous, devourer's cute.

No, but Birds of a Feather. Toy Story chomps. Barbie nibbles. Toy Story chomps. Toy Story 3 should have Oscars. Say it again. Toy Story 4 is amazing, but Toy Story 3 is... It 3 is one of the best anime films I think there is. Bam, boom, boom.

And I liked Barbie, but I guess the absolute neck crack of I can't believe. It's not butter. I can't believe it's not butter. When I've seen Barbie twice, I was like, I didn't feel best movie, best actress about it. No. I liked it, but I didn't feel that way about it. I can't really give it like a good evaluation as I have not yet seen all of the Oscar films in contention,

but I certainly didn't cross my mind while I was in the theater thinking, this is going to sweep the Oscars. Because it's also so random. Who knows who's going to get a nomination and for what? It's the Academy that's voted on by people, human beings in Hollywood. Why do we think there's some kind of objective truth or, It's the academy that's voted on by people, human beings in Hollywood.

Why do we think there's some kind of objective truth or, and I'm still flummoxed. I never get to use that word. We're like, why actors, so they're millionaires, sometimes billionaires, so world famous, so gorgeous, so incredible, whatever wealth. And then they're genuinely, sincerely moved to tears when they do receive the support of a fraction of their peers i'm like what is so wrong with you what is actually so fucking wrong with you nowadays back in the day it was a little different because there were tabloids that people were real stars the people were real stars like sigourney weaver meryl streep susan sarandon way back in the day even lauren Bacall way back then. Pierce Brosnan. No, honestly, those are real stars.

Cary Grant, real stars. Tabloids, Hollywood. That meant something maybe, but now it doesn't mean shit. It doesn't mean shit. I never watched the Oscar movies, so I guess I have no skin in the game. Oh no, nobody watches the Oscars anymore. I think it was a...

I guess I just thought, I thought of Barbie as really good. Oh no, nobody watches the Oscars anymore. I think it was a, I guess I just thought, I thought of Barbie as really good or fun, fun, good and fun. And I honestly thought that's not the type of movie that awards will ever take seriously. The same way they don't like horror, the same way they don't like comedy. I was like killers of the flower moon should win an Oscar.

Barbie's so good at what it does, but I didn't expect it to be Oscar-y. I thought Oscar people would be like, no, that movie is too fun and commercial. It's pink. I thought it'd be oscary i thought oscar people be like no that movie's too fun and commercial you know it's pink i thought it'd be snooty yeah so i wasn't surprised i i thought well yeah the the awards are too snooty for a fun movie like that of course is killers of the flower moon nominated lily gladstone i believe received a best actor

nomination actress now that movie clocking in at about 16 and a half hours i watched it now believe me when i see a movie like once upon a Now, believe me, when I see a movie like Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, when I see a movie like I, Tonya, I get up and scream Margot Robbie's name from the rooftop and I say, give her the award. The statue is in her hands. But for Barbie, I thought, what a great movie that they did, probably knowing damn well, because it's a comedy and stuff,

it won't get considered. Right. And maybe that's like me being closed-minded, but I thought. I think it's also Twitter. I think it's the brouhaha online that is really driving this discussion. I'm actually convinced that it has something to do with gaining buzz for the televised cast of the Oscars.

Sure. Do you know what I mean? Because that's a dying audience. Because movies have global impact and they can be huge. The Barbie movie is a phenomenon, right? It's like Harry Potter or something. It's so big. It's crazy.

But the most talked about in most billboards doesn't doesn't doesn't immediately blast open that door for instant awards oh and i also think it's like you can love it without feeling like it it needs to have an award if you love it you love it it's great yeah i don't i'll go back do you think any of my russian language music albums have awards not a damn one of them Do I listen to them ad nauseum nonstop? You better believe it. Last thing, the cursed,

not the curse series, which is also fabulous with Nathan Fielder and Emma Starn. Emma Starn. Starn. The cursed, a movie, I believe 20 last year, perhaps.

Mama. There wasn't, there has not been a movie created for me specifically ever, ever, ever. Let me just paint a really quick picture. Back in the day, I think it's around in the 19th century, 1800s, a couple of Roma, aka gypsies, a community, live in a field, like in a kind of a village sense that something's happening there's some there's gonna be some trouble so we need to have one heaven yes we need to talk about the white settlers the English okay though a woman says you need to prepare the thing I sent something coming the man molts down silver coins into a vampire grill.

And then she puts it in a box, curses it with an incantation, and buries it. Soon after, their land is one to... I'm going to watch this. Please don't ruin all of it. I won't. I'll just give you the good part. So shortly thereafter, the surrounding, I believe they're English. English colonizers say, this land is, well, we got to scare these people off the land. We'll just scare them off.

They'll go. And this long, wide shot of a scare. And then somebody gets shot. And then the whole village gets destroyed. And then the guy who made the molten teeth gets his arms and legs chopped off, straw stuffed into the stumps and strung up like a scarce girl while the woman who did the incantation gets buried alive. And then revenge happens for the rest of the film.

I love revenge things. It's... Part of why I love Kill Bill. And do you ever see Last House on the Left? Jennifer Lawrence. There's a little... Wait, is that the right movie? That's the R.A.P.E. one. The one with the rather gratuitous sexual assault scene. I don't like that. However,

it makes the revenge part of it like getter jade. It's fierce. This is so delicious. It's so chomp chomp chomp chomp. I can't wait because you know what it's going to do? It's so violent. It's going to make it so that I don't have to go exact revenge in real life. I can get the nuggets through television.

Yeah, and I've been fascinated by the Roma since I was 12. I tried to learn Romanian because of it. Very hard language, by the way. And they don't even really speak actual Romanian. But it's such a fascinating group of folks that kind of defy ethnicity in a way, like they're, they're wandering nomadic kind of people. Sure. And, and similar, like the Irish gypsies is not politically correct. No, no, no. It's not politically correct. Um, is it Romney sometimes? Isn't that okay? Okay. Yes. Romani. I learned that from that gypsy wedding dress show.

Sure. Yes. Which is a great show. Yeah. It's a fabulous show. I actually was, they did a Boston version and I was, um, I interviewed to, to be, um, on it. Not as a, as a person, a drag, they wanted a drag queen. Oh. Isn't that fierce? Yeah. The wedding traditions within that community are spectacular. It's kind of quinceanera-ish.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So anyways, the, um, what transpires next is that the children adjacent to this field years later start having visions in their nightmares about the scarecrow and the teeth. Love. And then some little boy digs up the teeth and is compelled to put them in his mouth and he chomps on his little brother.

Love. We're going to leave it there. Thank you for joining us this week. And next week we have a very, very, very special episode. So we'll see that. Dolly Parton is coming on. Love. We're going to leave it there. Thank you for joining us this week. And next week we have a very, very, very special episodes. We'll see that. Dolly Parton is coming on.

Yeah. We have Dolly Parton, Barack Obama, Julia Roberts, and Reg Park. And Post Malone. Post Malone. He's doing base tattoos on the pod next week.

Bye. Bye.