The Basement Yard - #222 - New Year, Crazy Resolutions

Episode Date: December 30, 2019

On this episode, we pick some rather strange New Years resolutions. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard and happy new year Happy new year kid look at that look at that happy goddamn new year I didn't think this through there's stuff everywhere there's way more confetti than I thought there was gonna be but look where the starland is because I'm a star baby come on now that's awesome right on my tongue wow so this is a lot it's another year though another year another you know another decade another time I'm afraid to look in to be honest with you another year another decade another day the table caught most oh yeah thank god how you doing I'm doing good yeah that's actually made me a lot happier yeah I did it was very nice we do have some

stuff on the ceiling as well yeah that's that's that's that's probably until I move out of this goddamn place yeah that's fine there's no way I'm not gonna be able to play with this stuff now that's the only thing I'm gonna tell you this right now as soon as we finish recording this I'm gonna have to go to the bathroom so yeah I'll start I'll start you finish how's that yeah where's my water I gotta hydrate you know go dehydrated today yeah look at that happy new year happy new year you know it's another year it's actually it's not the new year today is it no it's in a couple of days it'll be 2020 yeah no no today's today's this is dropping on the 30th so oh yeah today yep yeah right 30 days has September April June and November yes I forget

that all the time that's how I know any days of the of the year of because of that 30 days has September April June and November and then also February which when I'm born has I don't even know how many days 28 29 it changes and we talked when you're born on the 28th or I mean if you're born on the 29th on a leap year you pick right 28th or the 1st of March I would just tell people I was like four yeah whatever I would too if it's not my birthday it's not my fucking birthday it's not my birthday this is not my day yeah fuck you I want my leap year day I want to be four I want to be four I want to be a four-year-old boy when you're four you're one when you're 16 you're four and that's all the math I decided to do yeah I was gonna say how old you have to be to like drink

you probably have to be like 120 years old that's probably false that's that's very false I think you have to be 84 listen yes 84 all right I never claimed to be a math wits yeah I know I know you're not don't know what I was expecting that I don't think anybody does you got any new years resolutions you want to tell us about yeah do some that I didn't do this year what's that um one was uh join a gym I joined the gym I just never went to it technically you did you did it you stuck to your resolution you know what I did you I did I wanted to sign up for a gym you signed up for a gym that's that's you did it you didn't go there was no there was no you know maybe there was no fine print about going yeah yeah I donated money to a gym basically good yeah good for that

they could buy a nice machine with all that money yeah so uh I did that you're helping out the city but I have like we're due to resolutions this year like weird ones yeah like everyone's like yeah I want to like go to the gym or like I want to you know read more or like I wanted you know whatever usual shit right I want to like do stuff like like I want to bottle feed a lion or a tiger cub this year you want to be with exotic animals yeah like I want to feed them and give them milk from a bottle and do that that's one of them right something with animals something with animals another one with animals too as we talked about it too I want to artificially inseminate some kind of animal this year I want to help reproduce animals

where is this coming from I don't know just I want to think outside the box you know what I'm saying I want to try and learn a new language which one Italian okay but I'll probably settle for Spanish because it's more useful yeah it's way more useful and I know more of it so I'm going to try and learn Spanish how you plan about how you how you doing that Rosetta stow you probably do really well because I heard that children's minds like they soak up like a sponge yeah you're not really that you know developed over there so you'll probably get a language done and probably like a month or two mm-hmm not just not yeah it's not much good going on up the stairs no no no so I'm gonna try and do that which probably won't happen but I'm gonna try mm-hmm I actually ordered

Rosetta stone did you yeah I'm gonna give it a real shot is Rosetta stone like a real thing like is there a stone no is there a stone is there an actual rock yes that's what comes with it yeah but wait what no no because this is one time where oh man this is embarrassing but there was one time so obviously you know Rosetta stone it helps people learn in the language yeah but who the fuck is Rosetta stone though this bitch just knows my language first of all I want to say this I want to be on record that I thought Rosetta stone was something that was created by Rosa Parks when I was younger don't know why different Rosa Parks still a great woman got a lot done but not the language stuff Rosetta Rosetta's tone maybe you thought it was a roses you know roses tone roses

tone yeah maybe so I try to make a connection there then one time I found this rock in my house that was in a desk in my in my parents room and I was like oh my god I think this is Rosetta stone because there was a bunch of words on it but they were indifferent it was in a different language so I thought this was the stone so you thought that let me get this straight let me try I thought there was a stone sends you a stone and you learn a language by reading a rock is that what you're trying to tell me I couldn't even tell you I just thought it was like a you know a mythical stone that my parents somehow had why do people collect stones like some people just have stones in their house it's like what are we doing dude one time I had this crush on this girl right

and I was really sad because she was going to Greece for the summer yeah I hate when that happens but she went to Greece and when she's on her way back she was like I got you something and I was like oh man what is it so she finally gets back it's like this big moment I'm like I'm finally seeing this girl again and I'm outside my house and and she's like here it was a rock yeah and I was like was it a cool rock though it was in the shape of a heart well that's kind of cute that's kind of nice I mean she built up this gift so I wasn't really expecting a heart shape rock and how old are you I was like 16 yeah you're expecting a boy gift I'm expecting something like some Greek video game that's like only legal over there or some

lingerie you know what I mean some lingerie lingerie when do girls start buying lingerie not at 16 right probably not and definitely not in Greece in 16 you know what I mean also why would you give that to me probably maybe more in Greece yeah why would she give you underwear I don't know maybe she wanted me to see how I looked in it I thought it would look pretty nice would you ever try a thong on I try a thong on I'd be spilling out I'd tell you that right now like a man thong well like the one over your neck no no no no no no no like a man thong like there's enough like banana hammock there to wear it to wear it I do it would you do it on camera absolutely not and I wouldn't know I'm not filming that either I'm not putting you in a

fucking banana hammock hey listen I made the offer I didn't even offer but I did no man all right I kind of have already you needed to yeah I mean you we put that yeah fucking mess on display that big old meat mess I'm fucking proud of I'm proud of that fucking car accident it looked like two meat trucks just fucking collide it on the highway going 80 and then she's like falling with a dick pinned pinned in between it that's what it looks like yeah that's what it is yeah no um but yeah that was you know shout out to her you know she got me a rock I kept it I kept it yeah it's nice you know and and I didn't go like what I didn't do that I was just kind of like in my mind I was like

damn dude I thought this was gonna be like a fucking you know something that flies that I can like remote control or something I just I something gas powered yeah dude something I got a charge yeah you know what I mean give me something that I got plugged into the wall look at me a rock what'd you say when you got it I said what is it she gave me and I go oh what is it and she goes it's a rock I found it in in Greece and I was like oh and she goes yeah it's shaped like a heart and then I was like oh that's and then I you know I just like you know I gave her a hug and like probably kissed her forehead you know I'm saying because I saw that in movies and shit yeah yeah forehead kisses are big yeah I don't know what's what's up with girls like when you kiss them on

the forehead they just like they lose control I'm a big forehead kiss guy yeah I like kissing foreheads yeah it's great it's a little pretentious I feel like it's like yeah give me a forehead yeah give me a little spot I think that's like a safety kiss you know it's like a sanctity kiss yeah you know Jack Dawson had one of the best forehead kisses of all time that's what I'm saying when they were going down when the ship was going down it was it was Rose it was Jack and it was that random chef oh that guy that got ping-ponged yeah yeah oh no no no they went down to the water together oh that one yeah it's like what's happening it's like hold on Rose one two whoa you saw that that was powerful too yeah um but yeah he kissed her forehead right before they went into the Arctic

freezing cold water you know what I'm saying you ever see that they did like scientific experiments to see if Jack could fit on the door or not yeah he could fit he could have fit that goddamn pitch you know there he goes that's that's James Cameron's fault that's true that's just that's just lazy editing actually that's the prop team let's get a smaller door in here yeah or get a might as well let's cut this thing in half yeah make him a believable don't make it arguable that he could have got on there that's what ruins titanic for me it's ruined oh it's not what you're disgusting for thinking it's ruined it's ruined no man I had that bitch on VHS titanic yeah and I always remember the second tape of the VHS when

you plug it in right you put it into the machine and it plays the first scene in the second tape was the dude her husband slapping the dog shit out of her in that sweet Billy Zane Billy Zane fucking slapped the fire out this bitch dude yeah he did he did that's a hot way to start off a tape though what's him what's he your what is it called like a gutter wrap something I was like damn dude that was a rich ass fucking diss calling someone a gutter rat or like a whore he's like a whore gutter rat gutter rat whore yeah and those idiots playing the the fucking violent dude how much do you love the violin no that's my favorite scene in the whole movie dude oh that'll make me cry for sure it's like dude I'm gonna stay let's play let's go let's just die playing this I wonder if that

there's any truth to that yeah it's 100 true that the fuck there's I mean from what people's accounts where that really happened that wasn't like something that got added for like let's all cry now I'd be I'd be kind of mad like I don't know I don't really like music in situations like that you know I'm saying if my life's on the line stop playing music yeah but like in that situation you probably don't even hear the music you're just like fucking frantic as shit when I'm really scared and like frantic and people are so cool that they're just playing the violin a mad yeah I'm like yeah you guys don't see what's going on here yeah you guys you know the ships sinking to the bottom of the ocean people are dying people are freezing to death yeah and you're playing fucking Bach and

a minor yeah what are you doing put the put the Beethoven to bed but getting a bolt is it Beethoven or Beethoven it looks like Beethoven it looks like beat hoven up and batch yeah batch yeah Sebastian Sebastian wait what's his name what's Bach's name Sebastian no Sebastian Bach was like a lead singer or some band I think Sebastian Bach yeah I don't know his name I don't know Bach's name they all had weird names back then I don't get it yeah I wish that one of their names were just like fat pussy but like it sounded like fat pussy but it was said differently like spelled differently like for like for pussy like a classic for pussy piece but it was spelled it like fat pussy like Beethoven's like you don't even know what's his first name

also when you ask someone when you hear Beethoven what do you think of the dog I think of the dog I think of the dog the big old fucking St. Bernard man slobbing all over the kids saving the day there's some fucking danger there and then wasn't there like a Beethoven's like big comeback or something he had a family yeah he had he had a main thing that he was fucking and like making babies with big babies and she was a she was a St. Bernard too right she was a big old thick girl when you breed St. Bernard's you just get big fuckers thick bitch yeah you got big old babies I would love to have a St. Bernard like a Bernie's mountain dog what's that oh yeah it was big y'all mad big yeah mad cute puppies too I love it yeah I could talk about dogs literally all day

I all I can think about right now is cleaning this up though yeah no at some point we will um yeah some some somewhere in the next four months we'll clean it up for sure I think if we bring the trash bin over and just like let's do this there's just so many pieces yeah oh yeah this is the four I don't even think you can Roomba this either no this isn't Roomba Roomba a bull I won't hurt yourself there buddy yeah another one I have for 2020 I want to go to another country okay um I don't care where it is I gotta go have you been to Canada not in a long time but that means you've been there yeah oh I thought you were just saying like do have I crossed Canada oh you're saying if I cross Canada off like the list here yeah yeah it's

crossed it's crossed it's crossed yeah um another one that I had was I wanted break a world record and I was thinking about the one that we were talking about stacking butt uh stacking butts oh yeah stack stacking hot wheels on my ass now when when they say stacking hot wheels on your ass do they mean on top of each other or just on your ass just like you could do it uh parallel across your ass and how many was it very doable it's like 18 or something and I watched the world record and I was like this guy doesn't have the ass that I have and I'm gonna set that record in 2020 yeah I need to be a world record holder in 2020 you know what has to happen I'm gonna add that's my list you want to be a world record holder I want to hold the world record yeah I say we

break some world records yeah and and for reals this time yeah we have the guy in the suit show up with a stop watch or whatever he has he's got a clipboard yes and he and he hands me a fucking plaque that says you have put the most cars on a human ass ever ever in the history of the world in the history of toy cars yeah no one in the world is better than stacking stuff on your ass yes I'm in yeah we gotta we gotta do a world record this year I'm down I want to do one but I don't know I don't really have like a lot of like special stuff like you got that big special ass and I don't yes I do I don't have that we can find something for you I need something like most pieces of bologna ever put on a penis maybe maybe that's just two because you know I put two because

I think someone has put bologna on their dick before yeah for sure but I don't think they've stacked it I could put like a pound of bologna on my shit that's what I would like to say like maybe you could hold the most weight on your penis you probably have to be hard though yeah yeah what do you think I should just stack bologna on my fucking flaccid wean it's just me and josh one two three four would be like that watermelon challenge yeah I always wanted to do that the one with the rubber bands oh that thing yeah you know what we have to do which you should film uh see if you could break a watermelon with your legs like put it in between your legs and just like squeeze I can crush anything in this canyon easily yeah yeah I'll

crush the shit out of a human with those yeah easily not not easily but pretty easy I could kill a man for sure small infant not even a question oh I could kill an infant yeah dude I've held babies heads before and been like you don't even know how close you are to just you know what I mean you crush their little heads that's I'm a sick man yeah I was just about to say that I was like that was a little dark I have I have random thoughts never mind never reminded me of a very dark joke but I'm not gonna say it on here okay so now you're gonna tell it uh no I'm not how dark is it it involves a child molester I'll just tell it well now you got it yeah all right so this is a friend of yours the child molester no no no no no no we haven't talked to

many years oh okay lost touch once I found out yeah it was over yeah so the joke goes um a kid and a child molester walking into the woods and they're walking into the woods and starting to get darker you know they're starting to get deeper and starting to get colder yeah and the kid goes wow mister I'm really scared it's getting really dark out here and the child molester looks at the kid and goes you're scared I gotta walk out of here alone damn yeah that's pretty bad joke I mean that's kind of more of like a murder thing you could have made him a murderer yeah I could have but why'd you go molesting because that's that's usually what it is it's darker he needs like a he needs a tone yeah you know

I mean you ever hear the joke here's the joke I got it I got one for you all right these are just jokes I didn't make yeah yeah I didn't make that one up either all right here we go uh a priest and a rabbi okay all right classic are walking down the street and they see a little boy and the priest goes to the rabbi hey you want to fuck that kid and the rabbi goes out of what oh so good man those of you who don't know because you're not you know you're not up on the the uh stereotypes anti anti-semitic stereotypes people say that you know jews there's some jewish trickery that goes on financially financially so uh you want to fuck that kid out of what oh god it's so funny yeah you know it's another one we're gonna have

better jokes in 2020 like less less dark ones those are the only jokes I really had I know because the dark ones hit the hardest yeah yeah what was that one about a guy throwing everybody off a boat what uh who created the framing of that joke like all right so this this and this walk into a bar it's like I don't know why do like 90% of jokes start that I really hope that guy has royalties yeah you know people out here just steal in your template this one's like a racist white joke though it's a racist against whites no it's a racist against like a bunch oh nice so it's like a Mexican guy a black guy and a white guy they're all in a boat and it's sinking right yeah so they where's this episode going you know happy new year by the way start up the year right yeah no

we're gonna leave we're gonna leave racism in 2019 guys yeah we got two more days yeah two more days no so like they're all in a boat and uh they find this magic lamp and they rub it right and Jeannie comes out and uh he goes listen I'll grant you a wish if you throw something off of this boat that you have a lot of in your country you know so uh Mexican guy goes first he throws over like rice and beans and stuff he's like I have a lot of this in my country but only gets like a a wish yeah and they're all wishing to like save the boat that just doesn't that it doesn't say right right so the black guy um you know he throws over you know this joke is racist but like you know he throws over like some soul food and like stuff that they eat you know

and he's like well uh in the joke they say watermelon but I don't feel comfortable saying so you know he's like yeah it's a classic racist joke yeah yeah yeah and then let me guess where this is what when he said he said he said what the joke goes he goes he throws over grits and he throws over watermelon he goes I have a lot of this in my country as well used better so the white guy grabs the Mexican and the black guy and throws them both over and just says I'll have a coke as his wish terrible racist joke and the way that these racist jokes would just fly around schoolyards when you were a kid it's unbelievable I've never heard that one to be honest yeah but yeah racist jokes are you know but you ever hear the Polish one about hiding up in the tree what what I don't

even know Polish stereotypes honestly I know two Polish jokes and I don't know why they're Polish jokes I yeah I don't know Polish stereotypes I only know like the main ones so like what are we doing so so uh how do you know a Polish person's been using a computer they'll be white out on the screen oh the stereotypes that they're like dumb or something yes yes so then there's which just has immediately like I don't resonate that doesn't resonate with me I don't know enough Polish people well I knew a Polish kid in like seventh grade and he was a fucking brainiacs yeah so his name was Adrian and boy was he smart then like there's another one where uh how many do you know I only had two Polish jokes that that from growing up um

all right so there's these three guys right there's uh an American guy a German guy and a Polish guy and they're running away from people that are chasing them they escape from prison they're getting chased so like dude we can't run anymore like we gotta like run for it we gotta like one jumps in the bushes another one climbs up a tree right and the other one is hiding like close to a body of water right so the the so the soldiers or whatever the prison guards are looking for them and they're like oh I think I heard something and it's the American by the water and he just goes ribbit ribbit ribbit they're like oh it's a frog don't worry about it's fine so then they're like oh I think I heard something in the bush

they're like oh so they walk over there and the German guy just starts making like you know like squirrelly noises like like little noises like oh all right all right all right all right that's fine then they hear something in a tree they're like yo I definitely heard something that's up in that tree let's check it out the Polish guy goes moo that's such a bad joke so bad they're all bad they're all bad and I love whoever like tries to like you butchered it I'd be like I want to see you do it because that means you're racist you spent more time practicing those telling jokes yeah I don't know man this confetti is uh did you have the same confetti in your thing that I had in mind looks like it

we can't stop touching this shit no this is not good for fidgety boys no no no we're very fidgety um so yeah basically what we're trying to say is we're gonna leave the racist jokes in 2019 yeah 2020 we're gonna start new start clean start clean yeah um you know I I don't know what resolutions I have to be honest with you our goals resolutions are like yeah of course like it's exactly what a resolution is yeah but I thought resolutions are like and solutions to problems like if you want to lose some weight it's like oh because I think I'm over where I'm gonna lose some weight yeah I guess I'm gonna resolute no problem yeah you can have goals you know what I'm saying yeah have some goals what goals do you have um what goals do I have I don't know man

I don't want to say I don't want to ruin the super you don't want to ruin the surprise I guess for myself is I mean every year I'm just gonna want to tell myself that I want to run a marathon but there's no fucking let's start small um let's run a five game no no no not bad just be like make a 2020 uh you'll see a whale let's not do that 2020 get no I'm 22 oh man I'd love to see a whale all right so there's one you'll go whale watching a whale what oh yeah you set out and log on yeah you can go whale watching or somewhere in Massachusetts but that's the thing I don't want to go sit there and watch whales like when dudes go hunting you say that now once you see a whale you'd be like holy fuck that's what I'm saying it might take me four hours though I don't want to

sit there staring at the ocean like a fucking idiot no no no you go out there in one of those boats those reserves they all they know we're all them fucking whales be at sonar and shit you'll be able to find it I would love to see a whale though man I'm gonna come up out of the water like see I want see like for me I want all my resolutions to be fun stuff because people fuck up and make their resolutions shit shit like boring things yeah like reading is shit yeah it's shit dieting is shit what about working out a shit playing more board games that's that's great that sounds fun that does and I enjoy that I like board games I think that's something and it's guess what you could do it yeah it's fun yeah I want I want to play more chess you play but you play

chess on the computer yeah you got to play real chess you got to hold those pieces in your hand go play an old guy yeah like central park I want to play an old man in the park and chess in 2020 and I'm gonna bring it dude he's gonna whoop your ass yeah then he's gonna give me life advice about what I should do with my finances and then he's actually like borderline homeless so I shouldn't take advice from him about that things haven't been the same since he got back yeah but he's kicking my ass in chess because that's all he did for a long time you know he's an old weathered man with the like a paperboy hat on and maybe he has he has an old New York Times with him yeah and maybe he is a little you know racist towards minorities but he thinks that Danny's just like

a tanned white guy so yeah yeah accepts him like he'll constantly ask me like you know what I'm talking about and I'm gonna be like yeah but you don't yeah sure yeah it's okay and he's got an old man name like Arthur yeah and I'm developing my nights so I don't want to like step out on the game because I'm doing well you know what I'm saying yes yeah so I'll play an old man in the park in chess not gonna say I'm gonna win but I'll play an old man why don't we right now just make a ridiculous list of things like that let's do it and then we have to kind of like we have to try and do it yeah but like it has to be ridiculous yeah yeah I think yeah I want to I want to let's do it all right my first one is I want a bottle feed a tiger okay I mean you're

shooting for the stars here no that's doable listen Steve Irwin we'll get a tiger you know 2020 your first fucking resolution is I'm gonna feed a tiger do I can't just go get you a tiger dude we're gonna be in Miami in a month and you could go there and you could feed tigers for bottles well I didn't know that yeah can you yes can I hug it yes you get to hold it and it knows my little finger I want a tiger to bite my hand that's what I'm saying be like a tiger little snow leopard tiger not on my finger and I fed it through a bottle so that's one put it on there I honestly could cry thinking about it yeah we're gonna do that in a month from now we're gonna do that okay feeding tigers feeding tigers and or lions with milk bottles feeding baby tigers and what and or lions

or lions milk bottles yes okay to artificially inseminate an animal okay let's move back I want you want to shoot play all right play an old man in chess put it on there we'll revisit it why don't we just combine combine the two and you are artificially inseminate an old man playing chess yes put it on there while he's playing chess you inseminate him yes nothing's gonna happen no but just to say I did it but he was inseminated was a resolution play an old an old man in chess in the park um play an old woman in checkers help an old man because remember what happened before let's help old man help help an old person with something with something because on our on our way here there was an old man trying to fill up his car he was trying to fill up a tire with oh god

on the way over here an old man was trying to fill up his tire with a bike pump he was trying to put air in it and he was using a bike pump and I mean we I was going pretty fast so we only saw him and by the time we got you know we time we processed the information we were too far I could have drove around the block but I definitely didn't know and as soon as I saw him I said oh god I want to help that old man so yeah but he was trying to do that I can't imagine it's too efficient no no no no and then you said you don't know what kind of old man you're gonna get yeah because you could be dealing with like a you know a next you know you know a veteran or something you know they're like hey sir do you need to help me get the fuck out of here get away from me brown face boy I'd be like

hey I just want to help you pump your tire your brown face boy I lost friends in Pearl Harbor because of you I'm like dude I was born here what do you talk about brother um all right so we have help an old person with something break a world record break a world record break a world record for sure what else um paint our faces sure I'll paint my face yeah paint our faces but we have to paint each other's face paint each other's faces yeah yeah you can't paint your own because you'll do a good job I'm not I can't paint my face you gotta say the person can we paint anything or it's just like there's parameters I'm not paying your thing not my penis I'm talking about my face oh oh I thought you said does it have to be face no no no no no like

does it have to be like do I turn you into a lizard oh you could paint I mean within your artistic right realm okay you know I mean don't ask me to put a beak on right right right right I can't do that right of course not right also stay away from from the color the color black we can't have black faces no no no no no like we said we're leaving all the racism in 2019 we're talking about 2020 resolutions here okay so we have feeding a baby or tigers milk bottles play playing old man in chess in the park helping an old person with something break a world record and paint each other's faces um get tattoos get it get it get another tattoo yeah okay so we have okay I don't know I want to get one I want to get one like tomorrow but I don't know what I want

you to I know what I'm gonna get I think I want to get done what a bird no what I don't know if I I want to get Eli's face on your hand on my thigh why are you keep looking at your fist I want to put an elephant right here an elephant yeah right here what's an elephant it's my favorite animal I love elephants let's go to Thailand and ride elephants I'm not putting that on there that's no no no yeah yeah but we could probably ride an elephant in America somewhere yeah but people get mad at us we went pretty hard after the vegans too last episode did we yeah I don't remember yeah yeah yeah we didn't go after them we were just like why do you guys want fake meat oh yeah yeah it's like come on let us let us have that yeah but we'll get a tattoo in 2020 we have to both

get tattoos in 2020 yeah have to okay we fucking do it yeah yeah I might get Charlie's name that'd be cool you know you know what I was thinking too but it's cliche it's like if you get a paw print yeah kind of cute though I don't want a paw print on my body did you get Charlie's face no I'm not gonna get Charlie's face um I would just get his name somewhere yeah but then someone would find it and be like this is your ex lover and I would say yes yeah but girls could be named Charlie yeah but it would be a guy I'm gonna put Charlie and then in parentheses male or just like the symbol yeah the sex symbol Charlie um ride a tandem bike yes ride a tandem bike I know what I'm actually gonna through Central Park listen yeah you know Central Park's not an

easy bike no it's tough there's some hills yeah yeah yeah yeah I'm gonna need you like either I'm fine are you in the front or the back I need power uh I'll be I'll be in the front I'll we push us up yeah yeah if you're in the back I might be that beautiful I'm saying you have to you're that's more that becomes more of a sled yeah a sleigh well and if we go backwards on a tandem bike hold on to your fucking hoses yeah yeah yeah you don't want that hold on to your hoses I liked it I got it what the fuck am I talking about hold on to your penis yeah I wasn't even gonna I was gonna I wanted to say horses yeah yeah that's fine I forgot a letter what am I looking up tandem bike tandem tandem bike price

can't be that expensive okay this one at Walmart's $80 I don't think that's gonna hold up no too much weight throwing around no no no yeah we'll have to go somewhere and try it out okay this one's $300 now we're talking yeah okay a tandem bike be great yeah who makes this mantis look at this thing let's see look at that oh that looks awesome yeah it's gonna be great you can't get tired on me though I'm not gonna get tired you can't get tired on a tandem bike as long as it stays flat we're good yeah yeah stay flat you want to get a tandem bike yes can we borrow one yeah you could rent one probably I don't think you said that so definitively and that's it probably easily yeah you definitely

could probably yeah you could definitely probably do that too a hundred percent could probably do that okay ride a tandem bike that was a really good one I've never ridden a tandem I've never ridden what else have you haven't done that you go up in a hot air balloon okay I'm not putting that in there you wouldn't do it what if we do it together no because at one time I was like yo I'm gonna go to Colorado and I'm gonna do a hot air balloon over the Rocky Mountains and I had this whole thing planned out okay two days later on the news there was a report that came out that two hot air balloons collided people fall out of the baskets and now they're spread out all over the the fucking Colorado mountains the Rocky Mountains okay all right so I was like I'm not gonna do that it scared me okay

because you can't you can't drive them no it's just a dude going stars it's just up and down stars yeah stars stars yeah then it's like whoa also there's a movie coming out of someone who couldn't stop the the stars and they had to climb up and like open a hole so they could come down how do you climb up a hot air balloon based on a true story I'm not buying it a hot air balloon movie hot air hot air balloon hot air balloon movie is that a working title it's a it's a working oh it's called the aeronauts I think who's in it who plays the hot air balloon uh Billy Jean uh but no it's uh what's his name Zach Efron's gonna Felicity Jones and Eddie Redmayne Felicity Jones is gonna play the balloon that's amazing yeah is it animated no man this is this

is fucking we're talking about people who's who won actor of the year I know whatever that fucking thing is um where's the thing oh find themselves in an epic fight for survival while attempting to make discoveries in a gas balloon they called it a gas balloon I want it I want the sounds like a white problem right there the aeronauts story that's a white in 1862 scientists James Glacier and wealthy young widow Amelia Wren Amelia's always having trouble up in the sky yeah Amelia Earhart Amelia gremlin what's her name uh Wren oh sorry not gremlin um they mount a balloon expedition to fly higher than anyone in history as their perilous ascent reduces their chances of survival the unlikely duo soon discover things about themselves each other that would

oh okay this is just like a fucking thing but but basically what I heard is that they couldn't stop it from going up yeah because the thing like broke so what you have to do is go on top and make a hole so that the air can escape and it doesn't inflate the balloon but also what you're doing at that is you're risking that it the air comes out too fast and you start dropping the earth yeah you're also just like how you're gonna make that two hours sounds like an easy fix to me just crawl up there make a whole crawl back down oh yeah how easy is it to crawl up a fucking balloon in the sky I'm just saying for two hours I'm gonna need a little more substance than you just climb in a balloon no dude it was it was they were so high that it was freezing I'm so hey I can see heaven

I'm so hey whoa what did they live spoiler alert true story I mean yeah they I mean yeah that's how they know what happened I want to see death huh I want to see death yeah go see death in this one maybe someone dies up there maybe they start eating each other that'd be nice oh yeah um I think it was like it was snowing or something the temperature is now below freezing and then she demanded that they start to descend but James is slightly going mad from the cold and since they continue ah man the cold weather would get to these people were like trying to go somewhere yeah they were trying to break a record for the highest it ever went also they're white so

like you know they get adventurous in the cold they're like I'll freeze the death it's fine it's fine I'm not cold yeah white people love dying for dumb causes I'm gonna yeah I'm gonna get in this balloon or I'm a I'm a base jump also I just feel like I want a base jump record white dads don't wear pants in the cold now they hate my dad never wore pants he just wore shorts it could be like 21 degrees my dad's like cold pussy I'd like dad it's 20 degrees how are you not cold yeah I gotta jacket on pretty convinced dads don't get cold my dad's never worn a hat in his life not that you could fit one over that melon but you got a big old hat on that guy's got a head yeah it's like it would be like trying to put a beanie on a lion

it was insane or like trying to put a hat on a bowling ball good luck they don't make fucking snapbacks that big good those are both good analogy so just saying I enjoyed both I don't know why I went a lot they have big faces that's the thing they do a lot of hair but yeah they had to oh oh are we spoiling the two the two I don't give a shithole it was in the it was in the preview so this is like you know it's well known um they tried to do some shit but when it didn't work the two resort to climbing onto the framework and releasing the basket Amelia then prepares to sacrifice herself like oh someone sacrificed themselves I guess they can use the cloud and parachute

so but yeah so climbing an air balloon all right so we won't do that um what else we got though I want to do some cool stuff in 2020 volunteer at a soup kitchen volunteer at a soup kitchen I always wanted to do that but never did it because I'm all talking I'm a pussy so we'll do that we'll do that or like slash like visit a children's hospital the kids have to want to see you there I don't know if they want to see me and you but oh they do they have a great time with us I think we're good guys but I don't think we would get them so who am I John Cena what are the fuck am I going there I'm just going there and kids faces like what's up it's Cena kid no I'm Joe Cena it's like

who the fuck is that you know no I think you I think you can just go yeah but I don't want to just like visit a kid and just feel it and the kids gonna be like dude not you bro like I put in for Derek Jeter and I got this fucking random guy here I got it I got enough going on yeah I got okay I can't today I'm busy I want to I want to make I want to make someone's wish come true in 2020 okay make a wish come true make a wish come true you want to go to Disney yes yes I want to go to Disney 2020 I want to go back all right I know I'm not like drinking or anything but I want to go back and get blasted yeah yeah that'd be fun be able to ride you know ring in I'll be able to keep an eye on yes you can go boss the wall yeah dude yeah just fucking fuck me up it was so hot that

day the sun was beating me down how about this my pale white skin no no no as my birthday gift right you take me to Disney just me and you just me you and then like other friends can come if they want you just pay for me to go you just offered for me to pay for a Disney trip yeah that's it on a way out of the price of these tickets are they expensive are they expensive I don't I don't know yeah well a bit about $300 a day bill oh that's not bad for a birthday I gotta pay for me too that's true what about a hotel what about this and that how about you pay for the tickets I'll pay for the I'll pay for the park you pay for the park yes if you pay for my ticket we'll get a park hopper we'll hit right right right right you you pay for me to get in we'll split everything else

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basement okay um but before the NFL season comes to a close I mean you're always gonna have stuff to bet on but with my bookie you should bet on the NFL before I put nothing better than putting some money on some playoff games a lot of teams playing to get into right now yeah trying to clinch spots also even games that you're not interested in betting with my bookie makes them excited because now you have some money on it even if it's something like little you're like you know what I'm gonna bet that this person's gonna have this many yards keeps you engaged yeah keeps you rooting for a team my team's out yeah my team is man out we've been we've been out for a while now oh yeah um but yeah they're they're the best uh go to bookie my bookie.com slash ag

uh not slash I'm sorry my bookie.com guys it's my bookie.ag okay my bookie.ag my bookie.ag I'm gonna keep saying it my bookie.ag there you go Danny um but yeah go check it out use the promo code uh basement to activate the offer um they will double your first deposit so if you put $100 down use the promo code basement they will put an extra 100 so you can bet you know I'm saying double down on that bet that you feel so strongly about how's money yes so the promo code again is basement to visit my bookie.ag today you play you win you get paid all right next we have Indochino custom menswear come on this is some this is Danny this is right up your alley buddy talk to me um Indochino is one of the largest made to measure menswear brands okay they're

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that's Indochino.com with promo code is basement for any premium suit for just $389 and free shipping okay Indochino spelled I-N-D-O-C-H-I-N-O.com put in the promo code basement premium suits $389 you think I'm kidding but I'm literally going to order one right now while Danny cleans up all of this okay I knew this was coming yeah it's going down um get ready to look like a million bucks peeps all right enjoy your new suit all right cool uh go to Disney World that'll be my birthday present yep take a picture in front of the fucking uh whatever that thing's called the fucking castle and castle yeah I gotta see this castle fake propose to me I will I shall it won't be fake in my mind but it'll be fake in yours that's fine yeah I'm gonna

say no and then run away yeah then we'll go to Disney um release a song release a song yes release a song yeah that's good yeah that's good yeah we'll release a song that'd be fun people will enjoy that a lot um start our own candle company I'm gonna not the fuck are you talking about not starting a candle company so all right so what's the list so far how many are on there okay feeding baby tigers years are long years are long we got time yes feed baby tigers lines with milk bottles playing old man in chess in the park hat help an old person with something mm-hmm break a world record paint each other's faces get another tattoo ride a tandem bike yeah volunteer at a soup kitchen

make a wish come true go to Disney World uh and release a song all right those are good so far there's a good those are really good so make a wish come true um when you wish upon a star oh makes no difference who you are that fucking cricket could sing huh anything is it the cricket was it jiminy cricket that's any crickety did he I don't know well dressed cricket as well oh he's a good tailor he's a dapper man yeah he's a dapper cricket um what else oh he's a dapper cricket oh eat a cricket okay I'll eat a cricket I would love to eat a cricket like a chocolate covered cricket yeah for sure no just a little scrape the chocolate off for you

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you can leave some of it on there I just can't have all of this yeah you can have a a hint of chocolate yeah um there was another food I wanted to try bull penis of an animal yeah no rock rock the rocket yeah eat animals dick eat an animal sure eat an animal's dick in 2020 or balls or balls yeah I'll set up for balls or dick and balls are just yeah if you do both that's just a double double point no I mean I'm saying like can it be one or does it have to be both no you can eat a nut or a dick okay so I'm gonna put ore here instead of a slash yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah um okay either animals dick or balls uh both um play musical chairs just a great musical chairs get the Santa gata studio boys in here

play music yeah and play musical chairs play musical chairs with the guys with dub boys yes with a z that's perfect um okay what else can we sing a song karaoke something go christmas caroling oh my god me you Frankie go christmas caroling how do you do that you just ring the bell and start singing just start singing I think we could put a nice rendition of jingle bells together yeah and we have a whole year to prepare for it so we could go through some training figure it out training yeah just you know I mean I can't I can't carry both you guys I mean I'm a good backup yeah I don't know how Frankie is Frankie may just have to like you know hold a tambourine or something yeah that's fine we could do that but yeah let's go caroling next year okay go caroling

that'd be nice this stuff takes us out of our uh what's the word comfort zone yeah there you go comfort zone um caroling um I've gone caroling actually oh yeah I haven't I have gone caroling by yourself I've caroled no why would I do that by myself did you go with like a caroling group I went with uh a couple of my buddies like four of them it was it was ironic that we I mean it was like you know it was supposed to be funny but we we went and we sang did anybody like enjoy it uh I don't remember I just remember singing did you guys like sing the full songs ding dong ding dong you guys did that that was my part okay I don't know the words someone knew the words my friend Sean knew the words we got to bring the words with you bring the lyrics

and someone's got a ding dong yeah of course so that's why I was like I'll step up to the plate and hit these both yeah you know what I'm saying you're gonna do great yeah yeah yeah I mean I got the bells down um what else is there build something now when you say build something like like a computer or a desk or a build a computer yeah take a woodshop class I'm not taking a woodshop class what about clay class what about one of those places pottery class let's go take a pottery class we can hold the spinny derbys pottery classes in it's what's called a spinning dervish I think spinning dervish yeah yeah I think that's what it's called isn't that a pitcher oh no that's you dervish let's you dervish a Japanese man yeah I always get that mixed up you

but yeah a pottery class be dope okay take a pottery class um try to get published in the New York Times what do we we have a column like yeah yeah like Sex and the City yeah Carrie Bradshaw yes try and get published in the newspaper I don't think that we should write that why not because that's the years of like college and and you know nah I got it I mean I don't think so you can't write I've seen you put senses together I could put good words together I don't think so yes I can I could do more more things with words than you think I can I don't think so yeah very very very I do very well good with words how many words do you know seven right now off the top of my head

no how many words do you think you actually know oh thousands upon thousands right I'm a great scrabble player I fucking beat the shit out of you in words with friends and then you go to me that's not happen that's not true I hosed you I was hosing you excuse me I was hosing you in words with friends that's not true and anytime you want to play words with friends I will thrash that ass I'm gonna go get scrabble yeah that's fine let me go and blade it scrabble that's fine also scrabble yeah is not out when you play in the app I know the words that I'm laying down yeah I bet you do that Bill you're not up there putting up fake words like oh no it's not a word because it'll tell you if it's a word or not I can't challenge you it's fine and also you think I

won't study for that game ZA Z I got all I got all those you know saying or triple letter the shit out of those sheets or like Q words like cat like QAT is a word I think or like QA or QI I can I don't want to give anything away yeah I know you don't yeah you better hope I don't get that triple word baby if I get an S there's three words coming you know I'm saying I'm attaching it on to something and then I'm getting another one just keep your J's away from me that's all I'm saying you better keep yeah the J's bro let's get to ten point keep your J's and your X's away from your boy because I know a lot of words with J and a lot of words with X yeah dude jaw jacks xylophone good luck spelling that can you spell it out um what are we talking about now

oh um you need you need to add one I've added all these things yeah you should have a good ideas you're an idea man I am I'm an idea man it's what you are I'm gonna keep them around you know um a pottery class that would be a pottery class would be great get get something sky written that'd be cool I literally I'm going to go go there right now what should we put in the sky like you can't put titties in the sky enough no still fat still fat let's get still fat written in the sky yeah how to get something written in the sky that'd be fucking awesome sky whoa sky riding starts at $3,500 for a single riding plus any ferry-free fees to move the aircraft into your desired location oh damn they bring that shit to your crib it's fire

they don't bring it to your crib advertise so this is like advertising yeah these people are smart right shit in the sky dude click here to fly your message I'm trying to fly my budget 10 million dollars I don't have 10 million dollars cash I'm sure if you liquidated everything to 10 million dollars I don't have five five million dollars yeah yeah what do I own that's like that I could liquidate a house yeah uh maybe yeah that's what I'm saying five million dollars liquid I just I just get rid of everything yeah areas to fly is it business or personal it's business start a business here oh man I'm gonna wear this way after Christmas by the way yeah yeah 100 percent I mean my sink's making all types of noise I would love to fly something

so wait how do we uh no NYC right sky riding sky riding right in the sky I was gonna say that sky riding New York City sky dude this is so smart yeah dude you're amazing with his ideas aerial messages fire guaranteed to be seen I hate how they do this man oh man now you're off the train what happened no because they got a request a quote what is this no oh oh you have to request that yeah you can't just have me give me a price still fats not a lot you could put your you could put like a a fucking oh dude you could do at the beach yeah we'll go to the beach and just be like yo don't tell anybody and just like point at it one and just says like oh my god why say Santa got a studio yeah

$4,000 for a joke oh yeah I'm doing this yeah this is easy I'm definitely doing this right something in the sky in the sky it's perfect something stupid yeah okay I'm going I'm going Epstein didn't kill himself we'll write that in the sky I don't know if that'll get approved probably the number of characters in a sky typing message is unlimited but we recommend less than 25 yeah man we're good my last name is nine alone and then studios is like seven yeah but it'd be funny just to put like something oh man if I had like a billion dollars that's probably how I would communicate with you oh yeah oh I was just like every time you were late I would have a plane on call and then I just put it in the sky just don't even bother coming and go home

late night air fucking jets like what's good oh man that'd be dope um that was such a good one I was gonna say oh at the billboard yes put something on a billboard yes love it we're planning this year it's gonna be a big year guys see now we got we're gonna paint each other's faces but we're also gonna be on a billboard that's what I'm saying you know I mean eat a cricket eat a cricket uh you know what I'm saying get a tattoo eat an animal's dick or balls we got stuff we got stuff there's a lot of stuff a lot of stuff world record world record yet a lot a lot is there anything else that we want to add this is this big list but we can get it done how many are on the list right now uh one two three four five six seven eight nine ten eleven twelve

14 15 16 17 18 man let's let's make 20 two more 19 do a live show okay do a live show in 2020 do a live show yeah and then the last one is gonna be you gotta come up with one I came up with all of these yeah yeah good the kids good the telecom net uh do meth yeah no small crack small crack again um every year we're gonna do this every year so I can crack um man I don't know oh how about build out a studio space sounds great build a new studio space love it like an actual one no more apartments no more basements yeah places to go a business a place of business a place of business

which kind of aligns with the shit that I want to do this year with key fobs I want a key fob and an assistant that's like hot but not too hot right because then there could be some HR stuff yeah and no one wants that and we have to keep a professional so she has to be something like you know like an eight but she can't be an 8.1 no no no and she gotta know her way around the office she can't just be sitting in there on instagram all day doing whatever no no no she's gotta it's just gotta you know answer the phone real deal real deal reliable girl reliable cow yeah you know I'm saying yeah she was born in a different state grew up in Texas nights nice southern morose but she knows how to be a working man in the north she could crack the whip crack the whip

keep us in line that's what I like doesn't get too drunk at the holiday parties in fact she's takes care of us because we get too drunk and she doesn't want us to embarrass the whole company my boys are crazy crazy my boys are wild she doesn't really post on instagram too much no she's kind of under the radar incognito if you will she could start tomorrow she sounds great yeah yeah how quick can you start absolutely so that's perfect those are great 20 things that we could do let's go over the list one more time yeah yeah yeah just so everyone's aware you know of what we're doing here so for the year of 2020 happy new year this is what we're gonna do me and Danny made a list just now in the episode feed baby tigers lines with milk bottles

play an old man in chess in the park help an old person with something break a world record paint each other's faces yes uh get another tattoo ride a tandem bike yes that's gonna be so it sounds dangerous volunteer at a soup kitchen and don't eat the soup uh make a when you can't eat the soup it's for so it's you know for the I'll taste it just make sure it's it's made right make a wish come true so get your wishes ready yep a couple genies sitting over a good uh go to disney world release a song yes eat a cricket eat an animal's dick or balls can't wait uh play musical chairs with da boys uh go caroling yes take a pottery class probably make a nice vase or vase you know something you know flower pot maybe a flower pot yes depending depending on how much clay

they give us write something in the sky with those planes uh put something on a billboard do a live show and build out a studio space I mean if we get all those done what a full year dude remember that year we did all that stuff yeah go on vacation also yeah go on vacation perfect I mean that's the thing now it's like that's the first step right there can't have a good year without planning out the year no plan that out it's already done already all jokes aside though I will say that one of the things that I've tried to do in the past and didn't hold on to was every month have at least one thing that you do that's like out of the ordinary and it's and it's worthy to talk about you know I think I've said this on podcast on a podcast

before like a while ago but I was like at least once a month do something that's gonna be a story you know oh we got some now oh yeah we got you feed a baby fucking tiger it's like I'm telling everybody about that yeah I'm not gonna get about that tandem bike these this this is all potential content too screw oh yeah us riding a tandem bike is just something else and we obviously have to wear costumes I mean what yeah like little like little sailors sailors don't ride tandem bikes doesn't matter still dress up like little sailors who rides tandem bikes by the way other than like old timey whites I got nothing clowns clowns no clowns they ride small bikes that's true but I think I've seen them on a tandem going over jumps and falling off the bikes no you've seen many

of them get out of a car which I still don't understand how that works I think that you just have to have flexible legs I never see a hole in the floor I used to think that's what it was yeah and they would just come up and come out yeah fuck clowns yeah not fucking clowns you want to go to clown college I don't want to go there no I would try to like see if I can get booked as a clown and do a kid's birthday party like not know anything just make balloon animals for no reason can you make a blue animal only one I could do is a dog and it never comes out good so you can't make yeah I don't know I don't know anything about balloon animals either I'm just not in my first these things are all doable like like we'll be able to

do a good amount of those yeah hopefully I can eat a cricket soon knock that off my list we can get the dick or balls to a probably in the same restaurant yeah we could probably get them there's gotta be a place in New York where you could eat some dick yeah I mean I mean an animal dick you could eat a regular dick like right there you could eat a dick that's that's easy I got a dick you could eat I got one for yeah um but yeah so a lot of these I think we can get done like pretty pretty we could paint our faces right now if we wanted to I don't have any paint though it's true it's true but I think I'm gonna look into that okay well I'm excited about that we have the year all planned out we're really excited guys we have a big 2020 planned huge

for uh you know whatever I'm not gonna make an announcement right now because I don't know if it'll be rolled out yet but there is something coming a big change yeah huge dude yeah a big change uh for the basement yard uh and it's not I'm not playing that up it's gonna be a big one yeah it's huge it's a big change for the basement yard yes um in a good way in a way that you guys would like because you that's it I'm gonna say don't say it but these people you guys are gonna lose your shit yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yes um we're gonna ride it in the sky yeah maybe we'll do that maybe well yeah maybe that's how we'll do it that's a lot of characters though this is gonna be a pretty bad it'll be ten thousand dollars to make this fucking announcement

now you can abbreviate a couple words we have to abbreviate all of them dog yeah pretty much um but yes that is all uh for our year but yes there is a giant uh like an announcement coming for the basement yard um that's not something I'm making up but I I don't know what it's gonna be so I don't want to say it ahead of time and um also uh how much time what are we at okay um other thing too is uh we want to thank everybody who contributed to uh the patreon dude the patreon yes um I want to get to all these names you know what I'm saying Danny what a call there the wheels are turning with that boy it's insane um but the patrons um we are we are changing up the patreon yes um that is for sure I guess that's kind of part of the announcement in a way

that's kind of the first rollout not gonna tell you exactly how we're gonna do it but we are gonna do it okay so we're gonna knock out that's how I lost my virginity that exact sentence which one I don't know how we're gonna do it but we're gonna do it yeah and she said that not me yeah she which by the way the girl that he's talking about wasn't uh Liz brink brink molar wasn't her at all it wasn't it wasn't Melissa Lambert either I thought it was Melissa Lambert no I thought I lost my virginity to her no yeah you you know you probably got her mixed up with margo espinoza but it wasn't her either no that doesn't sound right yeah another one yeah um awana one one new cap shit fuck that up yeah that's not her no we only kissed also Tyler uh Melnick I think he was at the party yeah but he

graduated a year before me that's the thing but Amanda uh Paris oh Amanda was there we we talked yeah Amanda she could really put him away she drinks a lot yeah yeah yeah she's she's Amanda's great do you remember back in high school that kid who was really good at football but he but like he had like he was no he was missing his like ring finger his name was like uh Caleb sledge yes yeah that was yeah yeah yeah that's right um it's so crazy how he's like hammer it's great yeah that's what we called it yeah it's crazy how he went to high school with all these people remember Henry uh Rathner oh yeah yeah yeah the kid um that was the kid that stole the keg for out of the cop's car and brought her back to the party that night yes and he like he was he was best friends with karell jensen

the kid who like always would eat sugar cookies yes yes and he was type one diabetic yeah we'd all laugh when he would fall asleep yeah and now look at me it's yeah it's so it comes full yeah yeah yeah and i mean that was something that austin uh zured red chick would uh you know mourn us about oh yeah but austin austin was awesome about it yeah he was awesome austin we called him that's a that's a yes we called him awesome austin yes and then there was uh uh we called him Tommy connery but that wasn't his name no no no his name was uh thomas uh i was a character he would play yeah this is thomas uh connear knee that's that's the guy i was thinking of i knew it was Tommy something yeah i knew it was Tommy something but yeah those guys could all put him away those guys were crazy yeah it just

you know uh they were awesome remember prom night dude yeah dude he was fucking sick how do i not remember i know you went to prom with uh maria rose all all of stulte or got that wrong but you know it was a tough name she never held it against me for not getting her name right no she didn't get mad that i forgot a corsage either so it was it was great she was awesome to be with i didn't get any but it was okay because she was too hot for me right i was just happy to say that she said yes yeah because she was two years older than me i i was a sophomore and i went to prom i asked jamie zuber to go to prom but she told me no so i went with alahandra astrella i mean she was you know and actually i ended up being a better time yeah i mean for sure and then like alahandra is awesome

yeah dude and adam and devin willin are just like some of the coolest guys because they knew i was upset but they like kind of comforted me oh the twins yeah yeah uh but i don't think they were twins i think they were just brothers no no no they were twins no they're not because i remember joe uh main you know they were joe main told me that you know they were they were brothers but they look so identical that we called them twins that's what it was that's what he said they lived on the same block as mariam uh barucha oh the dead oh the cul-de-sac and the cul-de-sac why'd you say dead oh the dead not the dead cul-de-sac yeah no not dead no no no yeah i thought you were saying kyle gardener was dead he's not dead he's alive and kicking you know what i mean kyle gardener is a great guy

i know and dude do you remember jada williamson do i remember jada williamson no williamson i'm sorry i just yeah it's okay that's fine you know we get those mixed up yeah remember that time she put all that tapioca pudding all over mr eckelman's head dude yeah she's crazy yeah yeah i dared her i didn't think she would do it dude me and demetri gonzalez were dying laughing that day oh my god demetri he was always late he was always always late love bacon egg and cheese too yeah and like you know katelyn uh mcculloch she was she like wore the same shirt like three days in a row but like she was really cool yeah but like i she did it on purpose because like you know she went through that phase like i don't care about anybody yeah her and sydney adams and andrew paris and tom

jones they were always together a man to follow and was in that group yeah she she dabbled yeah nathan uh brent brender brender yeah forgot to say his last name what was that kid's name that was the school president uh john smiley john smiley that's right yeah yeah and then we always used to tell him to smile even get angry yeah because we're making fun of his name louisa ramos she was treasurer she was treasurer yeah exactly and dude what happened to all these people i don't know man i'm trying to think about it and like looking back on it i'm like yo high school is so crazy man i miss them yeah and like cody perry also is just a person that you know and it's again he got into some trouble you know just to say it again like it's wild that we went to high school with all of these people who

are now our our patrons on patreon that's um that's you want to know that it is it's a trip down memory length and and it's just a testament to how good of people we were in high school yeah and you just like you you lose connection with people you you you you miss people like that pinderbrar yeah you know what i'm saying yeah of course and listen not for nothing but i'm kind of excited to not see gape sleaze egg oh i mean you know the sleaze the sleaze yeah i mean i could do i could do without him yeah like he he was you know it was fun in high school but he never turned it off yeah yeah yeah i wore weird leather bracelets remember those yes yes you remember the kid miles uh the kid uh miles ramos who wore the the chokers they got hit by the bus no no no you're talking

about you're talking about uh page gillum page got hit by the boss that's right she had to sit out of tennis yeah and uh leah bella view was was driving it actually she had her commercial bus license oh yeah she had her cdl license she had cdl that's what i remember i remember i forgot what it's called my kenzie parma was like and was you know she was deeply affected by that she didn't come to school for a month yeah yeah she was always a bit dramatic though yeah i know she's crazy she was always kind of into herself yeah yeah she wasn't like camille amaral though oh camille amaral what a salt of the earth yeah great girl i have a headache from how much we're talking right now oh god she's fantastic we also haven't eaten any food today so that

haven't had any food uh you know but it's three o'clock in the afternoon now i think about it too dude i haven't had like a like a great meal since i was at ryan mcgregor's house his mom can cook miss mcgregor would throw down to miss mcgregor made and roman tiberius digby come on in that take care of you yeah roman tiberius digby used to come over and he used to help make the soup yeah and that was used to be fire too yeah yeah yeah and luke uh riddler i mean what a guy what can you say about a good linebacker yeah it's a great linebacker um you know wait what was the name of the starting quarterback what the fuck's his name chris mckay chris mckay chris mckay and then john cominsky's in the backfield yeah he would have went they both would have went to the

league they both didn't tear their acls in the same day in the same game while we were at the same place yeah colt ekoff you know if if he doesn't tear his acl he's you know i at minimum d2 yeah hallfamer maybe yeah you know it's cool that we went to high school with so many cool people yeah faith howl you remember her how could you forget faith gave my first hum hum hums oh my god did she knew that i i don't remember i thought i thought it was uh alexandra paro no that was the next summer what about brianna whisper no we went we just went to the same camp oh my god her name is brianna whisper kind of crazy oh mckanna right didn't she go to that camp she did but she i went weeks two and four she went weeks one and one and three i think oh yeah yeah so we never

really linked up um chicken fist that's just a name that's just a name that's on here chicken well yeah yeah yeah that's not his real name that was the homeless guy who used to walk around and like drag a stick along the fence while we played kickball well apparently well that was one of the most well-painted scenarios i've ever done in my life because i could see it you're just staring at him while you're on first base you're like dude this guy doing what are you doing sir it just comes he just picks up the ball in the game everyone just lets him what's your name man chicken fist oh my god you know who texted me yesterday jared harris did he yeah how do you get your number i don't know i think he got it from andrea

to doitz chuck yeah are they still together nothing i know i remember seeing in college like in college she was dating thomas donaldson i think but you they may have gotten back together that's right but that's right i forgot about that yeah summer rain oh my god that's someone's real name no i think i think that's her working name now her name is something else i've seen those videos yeah her name is something now something else now i think it was uh elijah lopez no no but elijah oh priscilla canto that was her real name that yeah she's priscilla canto do you remember that kid he like tried to run for president but he was just so like he would curse too much because he was like super italian he always had like slick back gelled

hair his name was like intonio fino fino fino fino fino fino yes yes junior yes yes yes yes his dad was uh had a waste management yeah exactly yeah yeah uh oh oh do you remember kendra tut yeah of course i do who wouldn't had the biggest hits in the class that's what i'm saying kendra big big kendra we called her big titty kendra big titty kendra that's what we called her kendra big k and then we had you know smith the galger obviously had the crazy cheeks yeah crazy cheeks small little thing cute little pog yeah tom louis there was always that rumor that he had like a giant dick yeah yeah no there was a rumor that he could suck his own dick oh oh the giant dick was mike laugh uh laugh him yes mike though that's confirmed i saw it oh you've seen it yeah yeah

oh wow the other thing i didn't say i never saw him suck his dick which he was dating k wilson i think briefly freshman year i think i don't know they were always kind of weird they never really said anything do you remember miss roberts of course i do joy roberts yes she's a patron of ours it's insane it's amazing her and and mrs parkin i thought malina parkin i thought she died no no no she's alive she's hot oh you know it was her mother her her mom died yes christ christine paladino yes yes they have different last names of course yeah well the dad and then the brother also has a different last name as well because there was a lot of stuff going on with their family half brothers her brother colt uh colt hill colt um you know he was always

kind of a he was alright he was cool he's hanging out with that bad group man he had adam perry there he had erik and zealous you know ashton penrod yeah he had these guys that a lot of kids calls in trouble it's a lot of kids calls in trouble you know i mean the you know he was the nicest of them all he was like the the the will hunting of uh of that group yeah that kid also uh jerry rubin bennett you know he was a good guy yeah he he would drama club he was good yeah yeah he you know he's when he's got two last names like that he's kind of like he's grandfathered into the drama club um but yeah you know also george hancock great guy his parents were loaded yeah yeah parties at his house were the best they had that floor that was invisible remember i yeah you could

like see see right into the wine cellar wine cellar that's what it was but it wasn't as good as uh bruce richway's parties yeah because bruce richway's parties where his parents were always out of town and i feel like it hurt him emotionally but like he he's supplemented by having huge parties yeah and like she live leo i want to i remember that she came to the party she got too drunk she fell asleep she threw up all over his stairs yeah yes yes and he fell down them and and and fucking uh alpha penguin 13 had to carry her out of there yeah i do and i was like hey yeah alpha penguin where are you going with her man he's like i'm just taking her home dude yeah and like james tilley was there you know andre uh hunalt and janice cybery cyberion oh

that was the exchange student yeah she was cool she was all right i couldn't really understand i got in words she was saying but it was cool yeah i know and then uh you know beter al shar han was also at the party that dude can drink like hell yeah yeah yeah um that guy was not not as nuts as brendan durrick though yeah because brendan durrick like his dad he never really had a fight his dad i've seen him fight his dad yeah that's what it was he got into a fight with his dad that one year and he had to go to a different school a vocational school yeah to like learn how to be like a board he's like i'm gonna send you to a boarding school yeah like he'd be learned how to be a mechanic when he was like 14 yeah yeah and like what was it dara keith she was a natural mechanic in high

school yeah she could fix anything and grew up in a garage yeah yeah so that was the thing about her we used to call her grease bunny yeah we used to just call yeah grease bunny um yeah you know it's crazy we actually went through all of those names did we really yeah wow there was like 80 of them yeah i mean it's my best high school days of my life i'll never forget high school i'll never forget the time with with those people that mean you went to the same high school together same age same age three years apart now three years apart now somehow you gotta let back a few yeah yeah yeah and then we parted with all those people yeah yeah thank you to all the patrons they're the best you know you're the best um water project

oh yeah well the water project was a success um you guys are awesome we raised a bunch of money this month for the water project uh which is you know on behalf of san agato studios all the podcasts and content that we're coming out with we took all the patreon money and we're building as many wells as we can in africa also i want to say something about that but first i'm gonna get to the good part yeah yeah yeah i know what you're gonna say and i'll back you up so i'm gonna get loud later but so uh we were able to build two um and we're gonna continue to do that for sure um they're pretty expensive like i think they were like the first one was ten thousand dollars and the next one was like eight thousand um but we whatever the remaining money is we're just gonna

donate two towards a project instead of just paying for an outright full project um so all the money is gonna be donated but one thing i want to say yeah i don't is that when i did post about that we're going to be doing this and and building wells in africa i got shit from people who are like telling me that like oh what about this flint michigan still doesn't have clean water yeah so that was one of them but it wasn't just flint michigan it was like other places like oh you know we gotta we got a homeless problem in in this state or whatever and i'm like i can't fix the world today yeah but how can you get mad at me for trying to do something nice for people also their children their children yeah their children who have to hike miles to get water we were donating

to help children drink water yeah like dude give me a break like i get it easy flint michigan has a problem obviously yes they do and i would love to help out someday but just because i'm helping a specific group doesn't mean that you get to be like oh but yeah this is cool and everything good try but flint doesn't have i might do it well also flint michigan is a part of a country called the united states of america so talk to your local politicians about getting that not only that but i pay taxes that money's gotta help eventually all i'm saying oh that's all i'm saying that's all i'm saying yeah so anyone out there that was kind of bullshit anyone out there is trying to make joe feel bad about having everybody at the studio be a part of this thing and help kids drink water

in countries in africa you're fucking moron okay he won't say it but i'll say it no i'll say it piece of shit you're fucking moron all right and uh i hope that you never listen to the show again because that kind of stupidness will not be tolerated here all right yeah only we get to be stupid yeah and the next thing i'm gonna build is a ladder up to your window i'm gonna come through your window i'm gonna punch you right in the nose okay he's gonna kiss you against your will lightly yes lightly tap you on the lips yeah i'm gonna build a well in your bathroom how's that yeah and you're gonna have to drink out of that yeah you're shitting your wealth yeah fuck you and that's all happy new year everybody and happy new year okay so danie where can they find you

this year you could find me at daniel priori on twitter and instagram and please make sure to go check out the stank podcast on instagram at the stank podcast and then go check out our patreon patreon.com slash the stank podcast we're posting great content on there now something drops every wednesday q and a's hot takes me and frankie just being clean boys or maybe dirty boys gonna have to find out um and other than that i'm good clean boys maybe dirty boys um guys go check out other people's lives which is another podcast on the san agar studios network uh where me and greg uh call up strangers anonymously and have pretty cool conversations um i think we're in between seasons right now but you can go back and listen to old episodes that are really cool um so go check that

out and go follow the san agar studios account at san agar studios on instagram and the basement yard on instagram if you haven't already and that is all see you guys next time