The Basement Yard - #286 - Dr. Seuss Killed Lola Bunny

Episode Date: March 22, 2021

Frank & Joe discuss cancel culture, Mr Potato Head, & Lola Bunny's fine ass. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome back to the basement yard, Hawaiian shirts. Ah! Nice weathers out, the fucking shirts are out, baby. You just shot finger guns at me. Damn right I did. I'll fucking shoot them all over you. Okay. Well, take it easy on that.
Starting point is 00:00:10 Really? That's where you draw it? No, seriously, I'm taking the glasses off. We just need to talk about something serious. Oh, why? Lola Bunny lost her tits. Oh. You're starting to hot. Yeah, dude.
Starting point is 00:00:19 You're starting fucking super hot. She lost her hammers. Well, she didn't lose them. She's covering them up. Very date-rapey of you to be in that shirt and talk about this. What? Rabbit titties?
Starting point is 00:00:28 Yeah. Dude, people are fucking upset. It sounds like I said rabbit titties. I mean, my titties that I just saw. I got a titties. That's my favorite kind of titties, dude. It's a fucking rabbit foaming from the nipples. Dude, rabbit titties.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Yeah, they're fucking crazy. Titties make a lot of milk. You could probably make like a titty milk cappuccino. Hell yeah. Yo, speaking of rabbit, which kind of sounds like rabies, I was mad afraid of that when I was younger. Well, that's where it comes from. When something has rabies, it's rabid.
Starting point is 00:00:58 Bullshit. You didn't know that? You kidding me? You didn't know that? You didn't know that? No, bro. Damn, yeah. No, but I was mad afraid of squirrels and other sort
Starting point is 00:01:06 of marsupials. I mean, you should be, because you don't know if they carry it. I thought all dogs had that shit, too. Well, I remember at the lake house, the fucking conversation, welcome back, by the way. Conversation was always like, if you see, I remember my dad very specifically like, fake, if there is a wet cold, throw it a day, stay away.
Starting point is 00:01:28 During the day? Yeah, because raccoons are nocturnal. If you see it during the day, apparently it's like a sign that it's rabid. Oh, why? They get all backwards. Yeah, they're like, yo, I'm fucking wild. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:36 You know? And I was afraid I was getting bit by shit, and then I would start foaming and then become a zombie or something. I don't even know what happens to you when you get rabies. I don't know. You see that movie, Wreck? That's where that's pretty much it's or what do they call it? Quarantine, I think they called it, too,
Starting point is 00:01:48 was the American version. It's basically a form of rabies, but like rabies is curable. That's tight. You just got to get a shot. It's like a big ass shot, apparently, in the stomach. Yeah, I'll be honest with you. I haven't looked too hard into Lola Bunny because I've just been enjoying the mayhem.
Starting point is 00:02:03 Which can I talk about something before we get to that? Fucking atrocity that I never got one of those shirts. I got to say, those are fucking exclusive standing out of Studio Hawaiian shirts. Those are fucking collector's items. That's a fact, Jack. They're so valuable. I don't even know.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Oh, god, no. I'm looking at the picture right now. See, this is just another argument that's not going to help LeBron when you're talking about LeBron versus Michael Jordan. Great as of all time. Because, listen, Jordan's got more rings and shit. LeBron's got the stats. But also, one of them had a hot ass fucking bunny
Starting point is 00:02:36 in their states, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, one of the fucking anthropomorphic. Not that, and also, too, I think they did something to this to her face, too. She got a bunch of work done. Yeah, but no, I think that she did the opposite. She didn't get any work done when she should have. Well, no.
Starting point is 00:02:53 We're talking about Bunny. We're talking about Lola. We're talking about Lola. Is it Lola or Babs? Or Babs is from the show. What the fuck are you talking about? There's a different bunny. Babs Bunny was another bunny.
Starting point is 00:03:02 Barbara Bunny? That's what it was called. Babs Bunny was from, I think, Tiny-Tuned Adventures. What a fucking joke. But people are very, very, very hurt. I never really realized, like, I always knew growing up that Lola Bunny would just get me fucking break the fuck up. But I never, like, looked back and, like, knew what.
Starting point is 00:03:22 You're just bringing out all the terminology. That shirt and those glasses are doing something to it. Yeah, I swear to God, when I wear sunglasses, different guy. I believe it. And I swear to God, there's a difference between drinking Joe and drinking with sunglasses Joe. Drinking with sunglasses Joe? You don't want to hang out with him.
Starting point is 00:03:38 He's a zombie. Yeah, you don't want to. He's a fucking different person. No, but so I knew that she was a smoking hot rabbit that I would like to touch and play with when I was younger. But I never looked back. Be honest, did you ever? No, I never jerked at the cartoon.
Starting point is 00:03:53 You ever spit and polish the scepter to Lola Bunny? No, no, I never cleaned the staff to it. Yeah, I don't know about that. No, I swear to God, I have it. I got glasses on. I would tell you. Oh, OK. I've slanted to numerous others.
Starting point is 00:04:07 Can we have a drink while you're in these glasses? I couldn't be need to. I'm trying not to drink, dude. I'm fucking, I'm in training mode. You're trying not to drink when you're looking like that? Yeah, dude, I look like I've been drinking for a week. Yeah, you look like you basically, all you need to complete this outfit
Starting point is 00:04:19 is just a single Toronto Raptors Vince Carter jersey. Yeah, yeah. Oh, God, I need Miami so bad. Anyway, fucking, yeah, so I didn't really pay attention to Lola Bunny in like years. But now that the story is more like prevalent or whatever, you see like the before and after pictures? That bunny was a rocket, dude.
Starting point is 00:04:43 This bunny was made like, like the physics were not taken into account when making this bunny. Oh. She had, first of all, she had a fucking whole, she had a week's worth of mail behind her. You know what I'm saying? She had it. She had a lot going on behind her.
Starting point is 00:04:58 Yeah, dude. She was carrying that sack for a while. Yeah, Santa Claus style. And then up top, I mean, this girl could have fed a fucking a whole country. Yeah, that was a lot. I mean, yeah. That milk up there.
Starting point is 00:05:11 Oh, sack of mail. That is so funny. But, and I get it to an extent. It's like, why were the female characters over sexualized? And it has something to do with deep seed and stuff. But at the same time, why does everyone care so much about it? Well, the thing is, right?
Starting point is 00:05:29 People are real horny for Lola Bunny, and now that she's not. I'm still, let's be honest. Let's be honest. I'm slamming that bunny still. You're still going after her. Hell, yeah. You're still, you're still.
Starting point is 00:05:38 People make it seem like they put like old fucking, like, oh, I don't like made her look like a piece of shit. She's still hot. Dude, what are the things? A little hot bunny. What are the things that? Maybe a hotter bunny. Peter Rabbit?
Starting point is 00:05:51 No, that's ugly fuck. Yeah, fuck that. He looks like an actual bunny. I like this one. But the old one had these fucking, these sexual eyes that were like, I'll suck you, I'll suck you in a theater. Will she go down on you in a theater? Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:06:06 It's a great song. It is a good song. I get, like, I get why they redid it. Well, this is the thing, this is a great picture. One of the things that I thought was very, like, one of the best moments of that movie is when she goes up to him and she's like, don't call me down. And she kind of like glides.
Starting point is 00:06:23 Yeah, and it's like a cheetah shoulder thing. Yeah, like she could be drawn a certain way, but like the attitude is kind of what got me going. Yeah, that woman who was doing the voiceover, who I don't know who it is, was definitely knew what she was doing. Yeah, it's very, you got to be careful with voiceover work because sometimes the people are like the opposite sex,
Starting point is 00:06:42 like the woman that does the voice of, like a woman does the voice of Bart Simpson. Yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? So you could be like, that's a sexy voice, and you don't even realize that. The thing is though, I don't really care. I hope it's a guy, because then that means
Starting point is 00:06:54 that there's a guy out there that if he got me on the phone, things are happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Firework is going, fireworks are happening. Have you ever had phone sex? Are you kidding me? I basically made phone pornos back in the day. Really?
Starting point is 00:07:06 Dude, I mean, you name it, I did it on the phone. You role-played phone stuff? Oh my God, yeah. What? I used to, fuck, dude, back in the day, I used to like- Like someone's calling a dentist's office and you're like, the doctor's not in. Oh, no, no, no, I'll be in you.
Starting point is 00:07:18 We didn't go that far, we didn't go that far, but like, there was definitely a time where I would just be like, oh yeah, what are you fucking doing right now? Oh, yeah. Like, no, but then like, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna fucking, I'm gonna rip, rip, rip your clothes. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,
Starting point is 00:07:38 I'd get rabid, yeah. I'd get rabid. Um, but like role-playing, I don't think I've ever done role-playing period. I've never been like, all right, you're a little, you're a widow at home and I'm the mailman, that's bringing you a fucking check. You know, like.
Starting point is 00:07:54 I've never done that. That's the one you landed on. First one. You got doctor's office, you got lawyer and someone who's in the- First one I came up with, yeah. And you thought of widow and a mail. All right, so what's one of the popular other ones like oh, it's someone. Oh, oh student teacher
Starting point is 00:08:09 Yeah, student teacher cop criminal cop criminal that might be a little weird that one doctor You know purse our dentist and someone who has a fucked up to let me see your teeth Wow, the inside of your mouth is hot. Let me jam my fucking penis in it. That's I'll give you a molar Yeah Root canal. Yeah, I don't know why they sexualized the dentist I don't I've never been in a dentist even if the hottest woman in the world was my dentist I'd be like I hate this place everything about the dentist is unattractive
Starting point is 00:08:41 Especially the fact that like there's just there's like dust coming out of your mouth like You could like cough up the fucking Sahara yeah But no, I've never I've never understood role-playing like I'm very attracted to like what I got right now You know what? I mean like I'm very attracted to my wife right now And I don't need to imagine her as something else than what she is because right does it you know Also, I don't need a job to be attached. Yeah, I don't need to know what you do for work I can't I'm not like during the day like like how these people that role play must see like a mailman and be like oh Yeah, like deliver that you yeah
Starting point is 00:09:16 Shit, what do you got there overdue bills? Okay? Yeah, no doesn't it's we got for the dog. Yeah, it's Watch out for my dog. It's gonna get you Damn, yeah, I was not bad right close your eyes Hey, Joey You just sounded like someone who was in like the 10th grade or something That might get some people off the weirdos the wrong ones, but so the thing about Lola bunny I get it I get why they did it and I always get they gave her face stuff, too Like they put these lines on I mean she was she was sexualized
Starting point is 00:09:54 She was an ant that she was an animated character that was sexualized and it has to do with this deeper You know and it also has to do with fucking pepula pew. I get it Pepe pepe's a different story. I get it pepula pew was straight up fucking insulting people dude flat out like that poor kitty cat Had no fucking like no hope that was a cat It was a cat and he was a skunk and and that was the thing is like it was he smelled bad was like why she didn't want him But like or maybe she just didn't want this fucking weirdo or this fucking smelly skunk is a little fucking pushy Yeah, let's be honest if there was any type of animal that coming at me with a french accent stay away Yeah, no and also like first of all who it what?
Starting point is 00:10:35 Why would someone pick a skunk? Out of any other animal that was well that was that was the thing It's like it was made to insinuate that it's because he was a skunk that she didn't want him But it's like or maybe she just didn't want him like that one I I get them both if i'm being honest with you like I get peppy I I get lola too. Oh lola was drawn aggressively sexual like but what does that do? What does that mean? I'm asking like for real One more time. What is wrong about it?
Starting point is 00:11:03 Because it's only the like it's it's so common in different forms of media that the women characters In animated media women characters are treated as the sexualized versions where fucking The male ones are just like oh, this is an ant noble. This is an ant with a butt like this is You know look at a fucking, you know, this is just a roger rabbit, but then look at jessica rabbit You know what I mean? Jessica rabbit That's not even a rabbit. That's not right. That's that's a pair of knocks that that is a walking How do I say boner machine? Yeah, that is a walking fucking Yeah
Starting point is 00:11:41 I had a care. I had a like creative. I had a tiptoe around it a little bit. No, I see what you're saying, but I don't And what I'm trying to say is like I get why they changed it, but I don't get why people are so upset Yeah, that is shocking It's not shocking. No, I'm shocked that people are like Oh, and then they try to make it about it. We've got to change everything now. Why it was so sensitive. It's like dude. You're defending Rabbit tits. Yeah A rabbit Endless listen me at five years old. I was all about lola bunny. Yeah, if you're five
Starting point is 00:12:15 Then you can complain. Yeah, if you're still because you're the boner like audience That's the audience for the boners Right, you want those five-year-olds to be horny by lola bunny. Is anyone even gonna go see space jam too But adults like us that grew up with that movie that are now like god, you know, we live in the pacification of america You've ruined my childhood. It's like this is ruining your childhood. It's like it's a fake rabbit. Yeah, fucking idiot This is what like this is really gonna hurt you. You know what I mean? Like I I would like to know the number of men that have actually fucking cranked one out to lola bunny I'm
Starting point is 00:12:47 Like certain It's at minimum 35 percent of the population 35. Yeah, joey. That's a lot. That's 35 out of a hundred people. I was being nice. I would say it's higher. I would oh, no, I would say like maybe like eight percent All right, that's what a lot of these fucking outrage now is not outrage It's the small group of people that make the most noise that just fucking travels across social media That doesn't mean the people haven't yanked I don't I don't know. Have you ever have you ever like legitimately honest to god? Have you ever like Fucking crank that soldier boy
Starting point is 00:13:23 For an animated character. No never and he like and I'm not saying like a specific animated character It could be like any of those final fantasy big anime too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, like, you know, fucking, you know Whatever porn, you know, where you know squid monsters are attacking little schoolgirls. No, no Well, what the fuck are you talking? Those are things those things. I believe it. I just I've never seen that But no, I've never like whenever I knew it was a thing but I just can't If I'm on a porn site and I'm like watching porn and I see a video of like animated shit And even if it looks super cool like damn those are some big old booby-boops
Starting point is 00:13:57 And there's some stuff going on and there's a lot of like Sounds or whatever the fuck right next to that Is like real people. Hmm. Just watch the real people. That's better for me. Well, it's like those people We spoke about this the girl that was selling her Bathwater for a million dollars and it's like her shtick is that like she plays like a little like anime kitty cat But like she acts like she's fucking 10 years old Yeah, yeah, that it. Yeah, you know That
Starting point is 00:14:22 Is a weird thing. I'm not gonna criticize the people that get horny For what they get horny for because listen, there have been there have been moments in time where I've been like what's going on Why why is it kid cat bars? Who knew? Yeah, you know, but Like a like a good potato chip could send me into space dude a good a good sour cream and onion potato chip Yeah, we're just sitting on a bus sitting on a bus gets me fucking worked up when I was in middle school I was always horny in cars. Yeah, yo, yo, I don't know why I couldn't and like I couldn't suppress it I'm on a family vacation. We're driving upstate new york. I got a boner for two and a half hours
Starting point is 00:15:01 It's just an instant like I don't know what it was about the car if it was the bumps, dude I don't think it's the bumps because I'm not like it's not like the car is vibrating. It's just like no It's just the pressure if you're something about the car It's just like your dick's hitting your pant and then it's it's fighting your dick wants to fight back and then you're just Oh, yeah in the back seat going but then I got to lean towards the wind I would always try to get the window for that reason. Oh really so I can lean you're in the middle You're in the middle. You're in trouble. Yeah, everyone's gonna find out you got a boner next to your brother
Starting point is 00:15:29 That's you know, actually one time I was in the middle Uh in in my car and I had my feet up and I didn't realize that my foot was pressing on the the cigarette lighter So our car caught on fire What we had we had to pull over on the side of the road and like our car was on fire What car was this? Yeah, I set it on fire. You set it off with that boner. It was this black car We had I don't remember what kind of it was not a popular car at all But I just like I was had my I remember the cars that like your family has had through history It was a black car, but I mean we set it on fire
Starting point is 00:15:58 So he can't well I set it on fire But like so I don't know if you remember it was not a big lifespan But I had my foot on the the cigarette lighter or whatever that was in the back and I held it in with my foot Yeah, so I guess I like short circuit and I was somewhere like no it didn't short circuit They probably just fucking made it hot. Well, yeah I mean it set it off and then like like what's going on and then smoke started coming My dad pulled over and then our car was like in flames Wow, and he got a he got a blanket from the back seat from the trunk and put the fire out your dad
Starting point is 00:16:26 Well former firefighter knows what he knows what he's doing Meanwhile, I'm standing over there on the side of the road cars are passing by there's a car on fire I'm like my dad's about to die an explosion. Yeah, and the whole time. I'm fucking horny I was gonna say you were probably super horny. You know what I'm saying? Yeah for some reason weird things get people horny Yeah, I think to me a fire that could potentially take my father's life on the side of the highway on the side of the teaconic It gets me going dude Danger gets people moving in the right direction. If you know what I'm saying. Hell. Oh dude, the blood was flowing Oh, yeah, I'm sure meanwhile. Everyone's scared my mom and whatever now. I'll be honest with you
Starting point is 00:17:01 Fear actually plays a part in this as well And this is probably when you were younger It's probably easy to hide your boner because it was not as developed as it is now Well, yeah, I also had paired jeans on and that'll fucking hide. Oh, yeah, forget about it blue jeans Yeah, oh jane, baby You don't know that song la lady. Thank you. Um, but I bringing it back to lola bunny like I guess you it is like
Starting point is 00:17:25 It makes sense, but the reaction is what I think is the funniest part like we're not like Listen, the nation isn't ruined because lola bunny from space jam no longer has fucking triple d's Yeah, this isn't this isn't biden's america. Yeah, where we can't have hot buns I can't wait until I see someone's tweeting. It was like under fucking trump. This wouldn't have happened Yeah, yeah, you know probably probably. I mean, I'm sure some people believe that but uh, yeah, no It's just ridiculous. Also. I wanted to talk about dr. Seuss because motherfuckers are losing their minds about books another one about books It's a book About green eggs and ham. They don't exist. No. No. No. All right. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on
Starting point is 00:18:07 You might be coming from a bit. I mean it makes sense. First you you're lighting black black cars on fire Very in line with you joe and now you're not really given context of this story. I know the context. It's there were certain books I know there was that had like racial stereotypical illustrations Uh, that's an understatement. I it was straight up racist propaganda It was yeah, one of them was like an asian boy eating noodles with his fingers And it was just like very clearly. It was an a yellow skinned individual that honestly is like
Starting point is 00:18:42 One thing. I don't remember the other ones. What were the other ones? literally like The n-word stop with the hard R stop. Yeah Not in like green eggs and ham and like I know and not the popular book I remember when I was like looking at this online There was pictures and it was like literally like a guy like You know how like the guys yeah, like of scorses and borses, but listen and then they would illustrate
Starting point is 00:19:07 Uh, they would illustrate black people with just like Jet black skin with these big lips. Oh, and then it had like the n-word on this sign and I'm like And mind you psychos No one's taken away. Oh We gotta get rid of the grinch or whatever. It's like it's not like this, right? We're not changing like whatever Doc the company doctor of the company the the doctor the doctor the doctor's office of seuss the doctor's office We're like, hey, maybe we should pull these because there's some stuff in them. Yeah, no one's canceling and listen I mean, there is a conversation we had that maybe
Starting point is 00:19:43 Dr. Seuss if not probably confirmed that dr. Seuss did have some issues with race But no one's sitting here and like pull every single if you if you bring fox on socks into my house You're dead one fish two fish red fish go fuck yourself It's like the company made the hot like they made the decision To be like, yo, maybe we shouldn't continue to make these books. Yeah, and that makes sense and also like Who fucking care like how do you have the time to care about a book? It's the same kind of upset that lola bunny is no longer, you know
Starting point is 00:20:27 Which she's not going anywhere the old lola bunny lives on forever trust me also We haven't seen the movie yet. There could be a scene where she's coming down the court and those things are dang it I they probably won't do it. Well, but I'm probably have I mean listen It's still hollywood. They're still like she'll still have some sex appeal to her a butt doesn't go away Even in hollywood. Listen the walk won't go away. Oh, that's what I'm saying The butt might go away, but she'll have the You know and and let's also be honest. There was something about like she was athletic as shit And she was fucking like bump bump bump bump bump like yeah, you know what it's more believable now
Starting point is 00:21:02 It's more believable now I had so because she wears like those now she's has like those Compression shorts and when girls girls would wear that and play basketball. You're like, it was nice Dude girl shows up in compression shorts, but for girls shows up in like little crop top and like little shorts Sucks. Oh boy. Here we go. Go ahead. Keep going with that one. No, you just you know I'm saying they show up to the court and they're like, you know, they're too cute. You're like, I'm gonna send this into the fence I'm gonna block her. I'm gonna block this shot so hard Someone shows up with compression shorts though and like they have like an ankle tape. You're like, oh, man
Starting point is 00:21:32 It's taking the compression shorts and then basketball shorts on top of it and the compression shorts hang out the bottom a little bit You're in big time. Trub big trubby. Trub. Oh, it's it's a wrap. Yeah, it's it's not good for you Have you ever like because I dated someone that like I listen I consider myself athletic and I um At points in my life was significantly more athletic than I am now, but have you ever at any point Been with someone or like talked to someone that was more athletic than you and made you feel like a little bitch Well, we had this conversation about uh, you know, there were some athletes growing up in like first to fifth grade that were
Starting point is 00:22:10 Oh, yeah, these girls are bigger than dudes and it's not and way bigger than the fuck I was Me too because I was a little bitch. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was a little bean. You were a bean bitch. Bianch A Bianch. Yeah, uh, so yeah, they were I mean definitely Athlete faster than me. No, but I'm saying like into like middle school and high school. No, oh, okay because I I I had and I remember like internally being like I need to beat this girl in every sport That was imaginable because in my in my un fucking underdeveloped brain. It was like, there's no way Men are just better at everything. Oh, I know. I know who you're talking about She would
Starting point is 00:22:47 Fuck dude drain threes like it was going out of dribble circles and it sucked that I also Like I I played baseball. I played basketball played basketball I played football We would play everything but basketball. It was notorious that I was bad at basketball Yeah, I I can't dribble rebounding machine though fucking in the paint monster. Yeah Can't can't dribble can't shoot can't put it on the floor can't can't do anything Uh, and like this was the game that she was good at so like it was like triple hurtful
Starting point is 00:23:18 Yeah, you know what I mean? I remember she showed up to the park to kick you in your day And I like in front of our friends like first of all if you ever challenge someone to anything in front of your friends You better win. Yeah, you lose No one forgets. Uh, uh, uh, it's gonna take you you're going to the grave with that one Yeah, and I was like, yo I'll bet you some far seeds in a can of coke that you can't drain this three-point shot shooting with just your left hand
Starting point is 00:23:45 And she fucking Did it thrice Three times dude. She hit it hard And I was a little upset Wow my fragile male ego But yeah, the cancel cancel culture is starting to get out of hand and I think it's been out of hand for a while Well, who's getting canceled? Well, like everyone's like I I understand, you know, the animated stuff with like peppy with pew Peppy the pew is I mean, this is that I mean the same thing with johnny bravo
Starting point is 00:24:09 Like these people were sexy. It's only johnny johnny bravo is on his way out johnny bravo was By your johnny bravo literally kidnapping women by your johnny bravo merch now because in a couple of months It's gonna be like those dr. Seuss books. You see what they're going for now Those books that were racist. I'll tell you this right now. They're like going for like thousands of dollars I'll tell you this though that kind of shit That's the only part that makes me like like this is all funny to me when people are like, oh, this is ridiculous Whatever, I think it's hilarious. It's like, yeah, we're talking about fucking fake bunnies like you're an adult Yeah, get it together
Starting point is 00:24:41 So that's funny the part that makes me super upset Is when people who are so like Angry by this like with the angemima thing, right? So angemima they're changing the logo or whatever people Who run to the store like oh, I'm clearing it out. I'm buying all the angemima Congratulations, you fucking they don't do it to like make a statement They do it to fucking then sell it for to collector. No, there's people who legitimately are making like a political statement to be like I'm buying. You know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna go and I'm gonna clear out wall greens of wall green
Starting point is 00:25:17 Whoever the fuck for their uncle ben's beans Horde all the beans we don't give a shit. No, I because I experienced this firsthand recently I was who's reselling maple syrup though, dude people like there's a market for it people will do it It will go out of expiration. It doesn't matter about that. It's about having a fucking angemima's maple syrup jug That's what people care about that's so guaranteed. That is all right. Yo, yo, that is so dumb I'm gonna look up right now. I'm gonna look up right now Oh my god, I'm gonna look up on these people think they're so tough and they're doing They're like sticking it to the man and like challenging the system by buying
Starting point is 00:25:55 Beans. I don't think that's what it is. I think it's it's uh, no, you're wrong. You are wrong I I understand that like you are into this and reselling or whatever But I'm telling you right now I have witnessed firsthand and seen like these people and the words that they say when they're buying these things And it's just a bunch of angry fucking like women named Barbara Okay, hold on I didn't know this existed and I just found this out yes
Starting point is 00:26:22 Captain crunches berry tastic pancake mix and blue maple syrup Did know that was the thing Blue maple syrup. Yeah, might have to buy it. I think it's old though. All right, yo Oh, no, they're not going for that expensive. I get maybe I'm wrong here. Maybe I'm wrong here I'm telling you but those dr. Seuss books those racist books. I'll tell you right now I'll tell you right now what those dr. Seuss books are going for those racist Just fucking racist ass books where it's like, you know, I will not have dinner with uh, a cat I will not have dinner with blacks and it's like god damn
Starting point is 00:26:57 He's gonna chill dude um These people all right, I can't find any of them while we're reading along like do you remember the name of any of the racist ones? No, I don't I I what do I google dr. Seuss racist books. I don't even think it matters What are you gonna read them? No, I want to be careful. I want to um, I want to see like what people are trying to sell them for I hate that people like Take this stance on these things where it's like
Starting point is 00:27:28 I read them when I was younger and you know what I'm gonna buy them now and I'm gonna read them to my children It's like congratulations, man. Like what do you think you're doing? Like why do you think that that moves the needle somewhere? Like you're doing some like some justice to Like anti cancel culture that you're gonna read this book. Don't use a fuck if you read this book to your kid Yeah, I'm gonna shit. No, it's going. I just looked up one and it's going for like 200 bucks online. Yeah, listen We're starting to get to a place. Let's go read your kid mind calm. Listen. I am all about fucking holding people accountable I absolutely are but I think we also need to
Starting point is 00:28:03 like Not everything is black and white in this situation. It's in the gray We're not canceling all of dr. Seuss. Dr. Seuss is not being cancelled cat in the hat Love the cat in the hat box on socks great book. Who box on socks. Oh, yeah, you ever read that one? Well, I do. I mean, what the fuck I was zero when I read these things tongue twister. It's a good book Uh, but like at the same time we can't Like we can't be like, oh Well, just because it's not just because he gave us cat in the hat and the Grinch and you know horton hears a who
Starting point is 00:28:31 We need to ignore the fact that there's fucking clear racist imagery in here Like we need to be able to find that middle ground and I think for the most part I do I think for the most part Sorry, let me talk I think for the most part people the general public relies like lies in the middle on that But we have some people that are so loud on this side and some people loud on this side That we completely forget about the rational minded individuals in the middle. No one's trying to cancel the entirety of dr. Seuss But at the same time if this guy was a fucking racist acknowledgement. He was a racist. Maybe maybe maybe Discontinued the book. Yeah, where it's in there. Yeah, and then we'll move forward with the other ones where they talk about, you know, eating
Starting point is 00:29:12 Uh, breakfasts that are disgusting. The other one the other one was the mr. Potato head was recently in the news That was another thing. It's now gonna be called potato head. I think Outrage Take it easy. Who gives a fuck. Who gives a shit. Dude. I recently spoke to someone It's like no, I'm buying it and I'm gonna call it mr. Potato head to my daughter Dude call it whatever you want dude. I don't give a shit. I was recently talking with someone about it and they were like, um You know, oh, well, they want to cancel mr. Potato head But they're still allowing kids to play like gory video games like grand theft auto and it was like well, guess what?
Starting point is 00:29:50 There are ratings on grand theft auto like if I want my kid to play grand theft auto I basically need to buy them grand theft auto. You know what I mean? Like I need to take the responsibility to do that mr. Potato. Guess what? It's it. Yo, it's a potato It's just not even it's plastic and it comes with the fucking ass with an ass with an ass that holds it You know what I'm saying? You remember it's got all that right there in the back but like We need to just like Chill no people just need to have a fucking like
Starting point is 00:30:20 Job Yeah, like do anything I get. How do you have the time? Listen angry? I understand gender identity and not being able to conform with mr. Or mrs I get that entirely and I think like the move to like just call it potato head is fine But if it's not called mr. Or mrs It's not an attack on you if you think everything is an attack on you or something about you whether it be your fucking Masculinity or your heterosexuality Hey, guess what?
Starting point is 00:30:48 No, it's not we live in a fucking we don't live in a geocentric world. It's fucking Heliocentric you like that, right? Oh, I don't even know that one revolves around the sun not around the earth, baby Oh, that's uh helicopters. Oh, no But like everyone it's like you can't you can't just be like oh Okay, like who honestly who unless you're mr. Hasbro. I don't even know if they make it Who's really affected by mr. Potato head being called potato head? That's why I'm saying like Nothing like no one
Starting point is 00:31:19 You know what I mean? And that's why when people like it's so funny When people like as far as pronouns or whatever it's like all they want to be called they see v. But it's all ridiculous It's e and g that's it and it's like Dude, you don't even know this person. You're never gonna meet. I mean you're never gonna have to use these pronouns No, no one's even asking go out of the way you and your friends want to call each other he she whatever the fuck I don't even give a shit. Yeah, just you'll never know why it's like air That's the same thing is like when you meet someone my name is richard, but please Call me call me rick and it's like that's a preference that you have and it's something that you want someone to fucking honor
Starting point is 00:31:54 Also, I can do it. Also, it's dick. It's dick. It is. I didn't go with dick because that was a bad example, but dick Like who gives and I listen I understand I get it and it's it's it's it's all about inclusivity, but like You're not affected by it. Don't fucking sit there and create outrage for it You know what? I mean like if I have to listen to one more straight white man complain about how they're They have to call men women and women men. It's like dude. No one gives a like it's not affecting you Yeah, I call them what they want what these individuals want to be called. I really just think These people need hobbies. I think they need just a I need if they had one other thing to do that day
Starting point is 00:32:34 They would just not care that was because no one can dude the people who have time to petition on the side of Fucking highways of like oh god hates the gays. It's like Literally if you just had like a doctor's appointment or something Even just go to get a checkup and then maybe you wouldn't care about this like oh just stop I don't listen. I there there's like That is a that is another level of insanity. You know what I mean? It's crazy and listen That was the day like you could do anything that they accept also accept your golf and lola bunny not that day Do that another day. No, I got something to do. Uh, but uh, I saw another thing that popped up and it was uh
Starting point is 00:33:17 Fucking um Not rock was modern life. Callan chicken. Uh, great show Dude, they were eating pork butts. The chicken was basically fucking This other thing in the ass wait, what with a sword or something wait, what I saw this clip on like tiktok And it's like great. Don't hold on. No, I can't but like it was you know, dude I was like what the and like here's the thing right people want to complain about oh, they're changing this to change everything That's how things work when you get more information bro Judy garland was like fucking eight doing blackface in movies. We don't do that shit anymore
Starting point is 00:33:53 No one's like oh, they're taking away our blackface like no one's talking about that It's like these are the type of things like yeah, there's books with these racist things in them Yeah, okay. We'll discontinue these books and we move forward So the people who are like, oh, no, we need those books like that would be like defending be like, oh, no Judy garland when she was eight doing the blackface thing and actually Judy garland didn't even like she was actually against it But you know, they made her do all kinds of shit put around all kinds of drugs. That was another fucking story Yeah, but like those things aren't in cinema anymore Because we're like, you know what this is actually really offensive. Let's not do that
Starting point is 00:34:26 Not only as individuals, but as a country as the world changes you understand more about the people to your left and right You change. I mean we fucking changed We grew up doing saying stupid shit that we didn't fucking realize hurt people and we didn't realize was fucking bad and stupid And when you get older and your brain is able to understand Hey, hey, hey Don't then it's like oh fucking of course like frank used to rob older women But he doesn't do that anymore and now the only thing I steal from them are their hearts Right, but he used to steal their money and their pensions as we slow down
Starting point is 00:35:01 No, I didn't and they're and they're you know a lot of their will to live honestly Listen, they didn't have much but I did take what they had He knew when they were getting near the end that they were gonna give it up a little easy You know, I all jokes aside all jokes aside all jokes aside all of them and need you to be completely honest with me He ever been walking down the street And there's an older woman walking towards you. Yeah, and you're like I could fucking Punch destroyer out of this person and take her purse and who the fuck would know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah constantly I I mean it's the devil on the angel the devil pops up and he goes we could and the angel goes we probably shouldn't we won't
Starting point is 00:35:34 Yeah, we won't do that, but I always think about I could just Blast this one. Yeah, I anytime there's any time there's videos of uh Of older people like fighting back and like it's them It's the it's the person that tried that's the the loser here Like there's no older person that could beat me up Just sweep sweep the legs a well an older man who like used to be a boxer or just fucking take you by surprise If if they got the fists for it. I'm saying though like if you go low old people can barely walk So I'm saying you go low get them on the ground. They're in trouble
Starting point is 00:36:05 Yeah, you know once if they're on the ground and you're above it doesn't matter how well they can punch or what they used to be They're they're done They're basically you might as well leave them there because they're gonna be buried there soon Yeah I always also think about when I'm driving and someone like cuts me off or they're driving like an asshole I'm like I need to catch up to this person and then slightly hit the back of their car So they spin out and flip. Oh no, see I'm I'm different I anytime that happens I pull up next to them to see
Starting point is 00:36:30 What kind of person they are and then I hate them and then I either hate them or I give them the benefit of the doubt For instance, if it's someone clearly over if they're elderly if they're 65 plus I I just like give them like a Yeah But if it's like someone like young like us they they get the You know Yeah, you know, yeah, yeah, and it's always the person you like Every time I pull up next to someone I'm like, of course. Yeah, I always know exactly who I thought it was going to be You know what I'm saying? It's like, yeah, of course it is. Yeah, it doesn't matter who it could be a dog driving
Starting point is 00:37:04 I'd be like, yeah, I know it's the only place where like it's okay to judge people without knowing anything about them when you're driving Yeah, because that's life or death right there. Also, I want to say this. I do become uh, like a like a nationalist. I realize On this bike thing. So on the bike thing, it's like, uh, this thing It's called Zwift and like you are riding on the road and you can see people in front of you Um, and their name and then their country Every time for whatever reason I see like Another like Canada in front of me. I'm like, I have to pass them And like like the people who are legitimate like bikers are the things they're smoking. Yeah, of course
Starting point is 00:37:46 But I always I'm just like I got to do this for my country Yeah, I have to pass this of course if there is a little flag next to your name and it's an American flag I'm like, well, I'm basically in the army now. You can hate everyone in the country But outside the country you need to be better than that That's basically the way America works. It's so funny. I'm like when it comes to cycling. I'm like, I have to be canada right now I don't blame you. I don't blame you. It's it what happened. It's you know, and I'll be honest Majority of the time. I I don't beat them. Well, of course. That's just what it is. That's just the way it goes. Anyway Now we've got our little daily dose of nationalism out of the way. Well, that was all you. I'm not taking any responsibility
Starting point is 00:38:24 Considering myself a nationalist Let's get to the end. Let's get daddy needs to get paid Uh, first up here. We have liquid IV which is uh, very useful if you're wearing an outfit like this and drinking copious amounts of Alcoholic beverages on ocean avenue on south beach You're going to need some liquid IV. They have an energy multiplier absolute game changer It gives you that little extra boost that we all need. You know what I mean? You need some energy They also have hydration multipliers that like I just said will help you as far as like staying hydrated making sure your body has Certain nutrients that you need
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Starting point is 00:45:10 Isn't that crazy? Jesus. Do you remember where you went with me when we got it? Where in the apple store in Manhattan and then we went to connecticut directly after Why do I not remember this at all? Uh, I don't know but we did I think that was the same weekend we drank A whole 18 pack in the same night. We drank an 18 pack of beer and then a bottle of vodka That I remember that was big old rough times. Yeah, that was not the sickest that was I remember being like this is one of the drunkest I've ever been in my entire life We went skinny dipping that night. Did we yeah forgot that part Did we I don't remember that part. Oh, no a different weekend
Starting point is 00:45:49 Uh, I'm talking about a different weekend. What weekend are you talking about where we skinny dipped? Oh, man, I you don't remember skinny dipping in that lake I was very afraid that a fissure's gonna nibble on my penis. I've I've been in that lake at night many times I don't remember. I I know I've skinny dipped there, but I don't remember like nights in particular I remember we skinny dipped Uh, no because skinny dout. Yes. No a a girl dared us to do it Yes, yes, yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. So we were like
Starting point is 00:46:17 And then Frankie. No, what happened was okay, hold on a girl dared Frankie to do it And then Frankie was like I think Frankie was like I'll you looked at me like I'll do it if you do it And I was like yeah So we all were in the water the way man You know like just just skinny dip in with your boys skinny dip with your boys And then I remember that your brothers and their friends We could see them coming down the hill so we jumped up out of that water. Did we yeah got dressed very fast Good old fucking times. I had like an existential crisis the other day thinking like yo all those like stories that we tell
Starting point is 00:46:51 They're just that they're just stories. We'll never experience them again. I Disagree. I think this summer. We should go to Connecticut get drunk and jump in the water. Oh, well, okay I'll do it. Yeah, I'll fucking do it. I don't care if I have a daughter. I don't go fuck. Yeah, no, let's drink a four loco Let's go nuts. All right, hold on. I'm not drinking that. Okay. Thank God I was gonna say I can't I don't know if I can yeah, I will pound 40s with you like it's 2009 dude I forgot I should have brought 40 you should have you should have you should have next time next time we're in an area Where we're drinking together. We have to agree on 40s I was freezing when I went to your house and it when it's hot and we could be in the backyard
Starting point is 00:47:26 I'll slam a dude a 40 and like you need to drink them quick because remember they get they get warm and then they just I mean, I'll drink warm out. What was it? I said, and then they're just gross Yeah, I would you like Would you ever skinny dip in the ocean and why is the answer? No Uh Well, um, hmm, I don't have a real answer Other than my penis might look like bait. Oh That little wiggler. Yeah, yeah, you got a little worm in between your legs. Yeah, I don't think anyone's ocean
Starting point is 00:48:00 It has a uncanny ability to make my dick just disappear. Yeah, I was gonna say I don't think anyone's had a big dick in the ocean Yeah, no, actually that's a lie one time I went to Miami and there was a guy like a few like ten yards away from me and this little speedo on and it looked like He was hiding an entire Christmas ham. Really fucking thing. Yeah, I was like, dude, this guy's dick is Heavy is that one of the reasons why you don't wear a speedo is because you can't fill it out No, I just feel like I like a short really if I had a massive dick and not as big of a fucking Gut, I feel like the I Would definitely wear a speedo. I think that's speedo. I think that people
Starting point is 00:48:38 You don't really know how bulges work because bulges are like mostly balls Yeah, well, it's mostly like that's the trick like the fat. Yeah, anyone can have a nice bowl You just need to kind of like tuck your balls over your penis and Like, you know, like turn it sideways now. I'm confused. Yeah, you like pick it up over You put your balls on top like a division sign not on top but like they like they they are the roundness of the bulge You know, yeah, that's what I'm saying when it looks like just like a big fat mess in there I'm like, there's a there's balls in here. Yeah, it's mostly balls, but don't don't don't give away the secret I'm just I'm just saying don't give away my secret Joe, which I actually makes it even more upsetting if you don't have like a bulge
Starting point is 00:49:20 It's like well, you don't even have fat not, you know, who's got fat nuts who Call him up. Oh my god, Josh. Josh. Hey, let's see those big old things Dude, this kid's got nuts for fucking hours. Let me tell you. Yeah, dude And I've seen those nuts. Not only are they fat. They're long. They're long. He's got long balls like his like I I believe his nuts would like hit the back of his knee. Yeah, he he lets the pendulum swing. That's Absolutely. Yeah, he is fucking like, you know good for him He's he's the speedo before he has and we had the picture
Starting point is 00:49:59 He's in better shape than us and he's I mean those balls alone Are a good enough reason to have a speedo. I don't I don't I Remember one time we were in Miami and a med put on some girls Bikini bottom. Yeah, and one of his balls said hello. How you doing? Oh, I mean, I mean, it's not a med unless you see a nut Yeah, well, I don't really agree with that. What was that? It's not a med unless you see is not. Yeah, I haven't seen it's not since that day. Really? Yeah I feel like we need to be careful what we say because I don't want to I don't want him to be like, yo
Starting point is 00:50:33 Why did you talk about that with his balls? Yeah? I Don't know. You don't know. Oh, is it like all right? Is it for like for us for men? You know how women like yo like here are my tits like take a look at my vagina like wait Okay, like to their friends like yo, they're like super cool with like yo like this is my fucking oh my tits are hurting. This is my yeah Is it like is that like like men like you're not really friends with someone unless you see your men's balls at least I'm not saying penis, but we but we We show balls as a joke. I think that girls show tits as like Like no, I think girls joke around with their titties. I don't think they joke around their tits at all
Starting point is 00:51:13 I think they're very serious about their tits to other girls. I think it's all like yeah, ha ha ha No, I don't think they're like oh because when you show a dude your balls, you're like, oh And they're like, oh, you're gay. You're the gay one. Yeah, and then girls don't go all here Oh, you idiot. They just go like aren't these dope and everyone goes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and then they go on I don't I don't know and they go to brunch listen listen listen listen listen I don't know about that. I'm a mosa and kid because I have a Sunday I've pretended to not be on three-way calls enough to know that girls kind of joke the way boys used to joke when we were kids So you're saying that a girl's had a sleepover and like
Starting point is 00:51:44 Yeah Yeah, or like a girl walks in the room. She's just like Well, I don't know about that one that's because you're not by the way, you messed up that picture I don't know like I don't show like you don't like as a joke show your men your penis It's not the penis. That's the joke. It's the balls under the joke penis is crossing the line This is where you draw it. Yeah balls are balls are hilarious penises are a conversation I love and I love that it would be like get the other person to look at your balls and then make them feel like they're Yeah, they're getting there. Yeah, let me you know not the person that's that's willingly showing you my testicles
Starting point is 00:52:24 I'm the baller. You're the ball eat. Yeah But I do I think I do I think they're like, you know, I think women we grew up How do I explain this? Grown up like as horny as we did you you often You often forget like you think like yo, no the opposite sex doesn't act like us and most of the time It's true like growing up if I was a 13 year old boy and you asked me like yo, do girls watch porn? I'd be like, no, of course they don't watch porn No, I thought that I always thought that girls would like
Starting point is 00:52:55 Watch porn but just differently like I feel like guys would watch porn not together like Individually and then they would like whatever but girls they would watch it like as a group and like ew. Oh my god, right? Ew, right? And like, you know what I'm saying? Like trying to be right, right? It's right, but so like they felt okay But like dudes are at home like oh and like you know what I'm saying? No, but we never talked about it girls. I feel like girls that are at sleepovers They're like, oh, let's Google dick and then they look at dicks I remember as clear as they a girl that I knew had googled dick.com It doesn't get more on the nose than that. I don't even know if that's a real website porn.org
Starting point is 00:53:39 Sex Com tits.net. I've done that. Have you I've done that like back in is it a real website? No, I haven't done like specifically. Let's look up dick.com. Let's see if it's real. It has to be a website Let's see if it's real. Let's see if it's but I have like when I was mad young out dick.com I would just Google like girls dick.com No, it's like one of those like fake websites That's like because it's probably worth the fucking thing is probably worth so much money though the domain maybe maybe yeah dick.com is not What about tits.net?
Starting point is 00:54:11 tits.net Definitely no, it's the same thing domain might be for sale. Yeah, I bet it is Go to go daddy type that in I bet it's fucking twenty five thousand dollars a year. You think so hell Yeah, I mean dick.com that pays for itself dick.com. I'm get I would buy dick.com. You're a millionaire if you get that you Hell yeah, absolutely. Yeah, but where where were we no We were just saying like girls watch porn and groups and guys just kind of yeah guys It was always just like this is wild. Oh, but no you wouldn't watch I would never well I'd never watch porn like in a group like I'll to be funny of being like isn't this stupid
Starting point is 00:54:50 But never I swear to God. I've never done. I don't know I know that there are so I've heard stories of guys like watching porn and like like like like coming together I don't know that I would that sounds too ritualistic I don't think like and then there are there are couples that watch porn together. That's also very strange Yeah, like yeah, what I don't want to come off as like sounding like mean But like why are you watching that together like I don't know it's like I don't I've never done that I've never neither of I I've never even been compelled like to me that you're crossing a fine line at that point like You know a lot of people have like a porn addiction where it's like they skip out on actual sex to watch porn really?
Starting point is 00:55:30 Yeah, that's I mean a porn addiction is like a real thing I didn't I didn't know that but like so people like sometimes will skip out on sex or like their relationship starts to Not fail, but like they It starts to be a detriment to the rage relationship because they would rather be watching porn so I feel like if you Not that you need to porn but like I would love you know what someone out there If you watch porn is a significant other and then you guys like kind of munch after that I mean, I guess it goes into the whole like role-playing thing where it's like oh look at that
Starting point is 00:56:00 Let me let me you know what I mean like maybe sure there's people out there that have like literally re-enacted a porn I Maybe I'm sure I'm sure actually. I'm almost confident like a hundred million percent confident. Yeah. Yeah, but maybe turn to a yeah real quick Yeah But I would I would assume it has to do like the same thing like role-playing like it's just like another way to be horny next to Someone and then like do something with it. You know what I mean? It's like they like it's I guess it's like kind of the group stuff too like on a swingers bar and feeling I mean think about it It makes sense, you know, you were telling me today You looked up a recipe for a milk, you know a shake that you want to have and it's like you'd look up the recipe
Starting point is 00:56:36 Watch a video on it and then be like that's how I make the shake. Maybe that's how people are with porn It's like they needed to do their research and they're like That's how I do it when you really think about it How did you learn how to have sex? Oh, I mean, I would almost say that like 85% of the current Like 25 to 34 demographic learned sex from watching porn, right? I would almost guarantee like but where we where else would you learn? I like I get like from Practice like doing it. Obviously you learn. Yeah, yeah, but they also have to learn From like like women obviously are the receivers of the yes, and it's funny because it create and I've we've discussed as a bunch
Starting point is 00:57:19 But it creates like a weird standard where it's like you'll have like a 19 year old boy Because you're still a boy at that age. You're not a man yet, but you'll have a 19 year old boy who is like Trying to recreate what he sees on a porno. Yeah, and then the if they're in a heterosexual relationship the girl is like Not you know what I mean? It's like the boy will be like You know and like trying things that they're learning from like these fucking adult actors dudes who are who are 19 and 20 years old I feel like take it to the extreme and they because they think it's like the normal and like every girl wants this and like whatever Yeah, yeah, and I also think that honestly from being on tiktok because that's how I connect with the that demographic of college kids
Starting point is 00:58:07 Careful they they're not that way in that like I feel like some girls also play into that So like a 19-year-old kid will just like I would say most You know women around that age are just looking for like a normal sexual experience But I think that a 19 or 20 year old guy is like is like now. I'm oh Call me daddy and you're like you'll You're like chill dude chill It's like goddamn. Yeah, this woman is just now. I just need you to massage me at that point in time I think like a woman is trying to like understand what they like as they're doing that
Starting point is 00:58:40 There's a guy behind them like fuck you. Yeah, fuck your butt Or they're just jackhammer it like you take it easy on this chill out. I just wanna like you said to just like fucking Slamming a guy flutterist and it's like dude. You're fucking DJ. Jazzy penis is coming through like trying to figure it out It's not a scratch and sniff dude be nice. Yeah, you know, but I do and first of all another very chauvinistic You know fucking male-dominated workforce, but No, it does it is weird because like you don't really think about it, but like you were probably like 16 17 being like ready for sex and like thinking like it's gonna be like I just fucking flip me over Like I just I remember at a certain point. I was like
Starting point is 00:59:27 It's just about speed. It's just about like Pump as fast as really not that I ever did that, but I remember thinking before I had oh like when you're young You're like 13 and you're thinking about it. You're like, it's just like go time Yeah, like yeah, and then the first time I had sex. Oh, I I don't even know if I was ever done control quick Yeah, and no, I it actually wasn't quick. Oh But because there wasn't like this horrible story of like One minute and I was fucking like it was I just wasn't in control the entire time though What oh you had to give up control from once in your life Joey. No, oh
Starting point is 01:00:08 Everyone's first time was like a minute and done. I was like fucking 12 12 minutes, you know my first time whatever. It's like it's crazy. I was in a car So, yeah, that's a little comfortable, but I was never like the the I Got fucked is what I'm trying to say what nothing inserted in me But I'm saying like it was like she's on top and then like that was the majority of it Yeah, it was never like I never really thought about it It's like a majority of people our age probably learned how to have sex from porn at least initially and then like trial and error Right, right, right, you know, but like that's fun and conversation of like, you know, I mean conversations you have like when we're like
Starting point is 01:00:46 Oh, what do you know? Is that like? Oh, okay What are you talking about? I didn't like I'm trying to think I think I'm picking up what you I thought you were saying like you'd meet Someone at the bar and be like, so how do you like to get? Oh, no, no I'm saying like people like your partners like you could be like, oh, so like did you like that or anything? Yeah, like oh is there something else you want to you know, and then you learn but like, you know, yeah I'm telling you man. I'm saying the dudes that are like like the first five people you have sex with Depending on how spaced out they are but like if they're all in college. Oh One through five. It's not having a great
Starting point is 01:01:21 Yeah, unless you're the dude in Miami who's just got a fucking leg on him. Yeah, you're just walking around prosciutto Yeah, you know, I I do I do have to say I do wish there there was a way I do wish there was a way that like you could have like a blooper reel from like porn because like I've seen a guy fart in a girl's mouth I would have been very first saw it online one back in the day I tried to download porn and then I played it and it was a girl like going to eat a guy's butt And at the time I was like, I don't even know what this is what is going on So she goes over like this and she's going and she gets close and he farts and she gets fucking man punches this ass
Starting point is 01:01:57 And I was like, oh, yeah, we've talked about this they did time No, it was just it was just like oh Wow but like I'm sure during your your life. You've said things during fucking a sexual encounter You've been like this is the dumbest thing like you're in it and you're just like, oh paradise I've never said that he just don't even realize like one time one time. I remember this specifically I said to a girl. I was like One time when I was having sex, I think I was like
Starting point is 01:02:33 Maybe 19. Mm-hmm. And I said you want me to ride you? Oh No, I was trying to get the other I was trying to get You're trying to do and then we both laughed because I was like what did I just You want me to ride you a good. I wish you just went. Yeah, and then I was just like I don't know how Yeah, a good laughter in sex. I guess that that really you know it breaks the breaks the tension breaks the ice or like an accidental like head Hitting the wall also great. Oh, yeah, you ever done that like someone's head hits the wall and you're and everyone's like, yo, you good And we're good. Let me get right back into it. No, but it's a good break in the action of being like Bang. Oh, well speaking of breaking the action
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Starting point is 01:04:21 All right, let's do it and drink episode. Yeah, and then we could drink like fucking like yeah like sherry What the fuck is that it's it's like a drinking wine or something. Oh, yeah, like a brandy or something Yeah, thank you shoot me in the back of the head. Oh, yeah, that'd be good And we just got to listen to like just Jimmy Buffett You ever listen to Jimmy Buffett, I mean that's good summertime music, baby. Yeah No sponge cake It's actually a good song watching the sun break. Yeah Stop doing that
Starting point is 01:04:53 We're gonna find you YouTube. No, I'm not I'm not on YouTube. I don't know why I said that Twitter and Twitch F alvers 8 0 8 5 if you want to come hang out with me and play video games on Twitch play Mondays and Tuesdays The Frank Alvarez on Instagram And then my first match in the shmo down debuted Oh got that big dub baby big big big dumb want to know baby So make sure you go support my friends at the shmo down go to youtube.com slash the shmo down. It's competitive movie trivia It's fucking awesome really really really cool
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