The Basement Yard - #313 - The Met Gala Review

Episode Date: September 27, 2021

Frank & Joe talk about all the strange outfits worn at the Met Gala & VMAs. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard Frank put that fucking tongue back in your mouth put it back in put it back in You're a children yeah, I watched my my I was gonna say my child my sister's Kid I could just say my nephew. Yeah watch my nephew by myself for the first time the other day How do you do pretty good? Yeah cry twice because once because big babies cry. It's gonna happen Yeah, well, I made him cry. Oh, well, I didn't I had a hand in it Okay, I did have a walk me through it. Walk me through it. Well, he was like, you know, we're playing with toys You know, I'm trying to like have some fun toy Joe I'm reading books to this motherfucker trying to get him smart for the future. Well, what books were you reading?

There was one called first words. That's cute where it's like there's cards and it's like ooh Apple and then there's a picture on Apple and then it kind of feels like an apple in a certain spot Those are cool for me. Yo, by the way, baby's toys very nice. I like very nice because they're all sensory so it's all like, you know Yeah, you know like all like things that like pop and like crunch and if they feel nice That's not what they're doing with it. No, that's a different kind of rubbing I'm talking about pussy. Yeah. Yeah pussy pussy pussy pussy Squirting we're talking baby. You're talking pussy Back to the baby talk. Sorry

Weird that we kind of that I mixed those in. Um, but no So, yeah, there was a book like that and then he just kept handing me books And I'd only get like one page through them and then he was like give me another book Yeah, different book, you know, so he's he's an indecisive little guy His brain is here there everywhere at the same time Then I got a text message so my phone lit up That was the end of that so he picks up the phone And he's looking at it like whatever and he likes to like just like

Do this with it like you just put it down for some reason So I went to try and take it out of his hands But he has like a fucking gorilla grip on this thing. Really realized so I was trying to grab it and then he like pulled it from me And he smacked some smell smell Smacked some smell from the smase He smacked himself in the face and then he started crying and then I was just like, yo classic comedy You gotta be bad at him like you don't be fucking mad at anyone else. That's what happens. That's what I said to him That's what happens. That's a metaphor for life. Yeah, you know, they're gonna it's gonna beat you down

There are times where like miles will be like I don't know what it is with kids I guess I was the same way or maybe you were I don't know but like they won't sit in a chair So like you'll put a chair and they'll be like Yeah, they wouldn't like stand up in it and like yeah and like they do everything and there was one night at dinner where I was like miles Button the seat Button the seat button the seat button the seat. That's the that's the rule That's the rule but in the seat at the dinner table and he fell and like took the chair with him Fire, you know what? I mean like like one of these like he fells chair on top of him

Love that and and he like he was like He like tested the waters to see like if we were going to be like And I was like that's what I I told you. Yeah, you know, I I love doing that I love it. I told you so do you guys do you guys heiny in the house? Do you heiny? What is that like calling butts heinies? Oh, no, like my mom was a bit she used to heiny like well your mom Your mind was heiny. Oh duty does or whatever she would call you guys when you'd poop. No, uh, oh diarrhea cha cha cha cha. That's it Yeah, like oh you gotta wipe your heiny if you got cha cha cha Otherwise, it's gonna get stingy bingies. I made that last part. I was gonna say I hope so

That would be the cooler part of it though because like stingy bingies. That sounds pretty cool Yeah, that sounds like a legends of the hidden temple team. It does absolutely does got the purple barracudas and the Stingy bingies blue barracudas joey. This is why we didn't get on the show purple monkeys purple parrots Fucking red monkeys blue barracudas. Got it. Uh, but um, no, I mean, we're we're pretty like Call it as we see it but but so like Butts peepies. Well pee pee pee. Yes. We don't tell miles like we don't say his nuts or his balls We call them newtons Newtons like fig newtons like fig newtons like Isaac newtons. Yeah, you know the apple falls far, you know

Uh, I don't know. We didn't coin that. I think his dad coined that and we just like except like he'll be We'll be like, all right miles go take a shower. You gotta you gotta clean your butt and your newtons Really? Yeah, I've never heard that. We made it up But like clean your newtons. I mean like we like talk to ruby and like baby talk but not like she doesn't have to We won't be like you're hanging hang on I'm like I say I'd be like you're you got big butt girl. You're a big butt girl. Really? That's what I call her Oh, you call her big butt girl big butt girl big time big time. Yeah, I don't know where that one came I just started calling her big. She Ray Lewis big time show time. I guess so prime time. I'll just like I'll walk over

I'll walk in. I'll be like my big time girl. That's who she is. She's a big time. She is my big time baby. Yeah, uh, but um All right, so good. What was the other time that he cried? He hit him. He smacked himself in the face like an idiot Sorry, Shannon. Um, I think that he just was like Just fed up like at a certain point. He was like, bro, my mom hasn't been here for a while. Yeah And he calls her m Really? Oh, that's like not and this dude loves hats For some reason. So if I'm wearing a hat So like that's like my go-to

Well, it was my go-to during that time where he started crying. I'd be like bro hat and he'd be like You know try to grab it like he loves it. That's fucking so cute He loves pulling it off of my head and then just giving it to me. I don't know if you can see I mean, I don't know if you could really tell or see babies Strong as shit pretty strong for fucking babies rubies been getting in trouble lately But like baby trouble like not serious trouble. We're like her thing is like she just goes like this on things now So if I hold her like this she fucking does that to the back of my arm. Oh Dude, dude. Yeah, and I'm like I tell her I'm like stop

And she like looks at me and like she'll either look at me and smile or just like Yeah, she like Laughed at Becca today because that's a big time look That's a big time look exactly big time look from a big time girl I I want to make sure we get away from this idea that like if a baby's crying like you've done something wrong Babies cry because it's the only way they know how to express themselves Well, I also think that they know that like it equals like getting picked up or you know, yeah That's the only like they in their brain. They're like

I am going to get a response if I cry. Yeah, because like if a baby cries, I'm going to just I know I also just well, we don't cover her mouth when I shut the fuck up. No when when uh, when mikey cries I'll just go no Really? I was like you're faking it and then he's just Really? Yeah, he's just smile like he's a fucking Ruby's not there yet. Like I don't I'll like as she like gets like as she like the wind up We call it where she like starts to cry where she'll be like It's the fucking saddest thing in the world, but I'll be like, uh, uh, uh, uh, don't you dare big timer big

That's what I say. I'm liar. You're big time liar big time baby big time girl Yeah, you know anything she does is big time, but good for you. Does this make you want a kid now? Relax, I just I don't know. I figured I'd ask. Well, it's not that I don't want kids I just don't want a kid right now. What's like holding you back Pat the idea of having you don't know if you could be yeah, I get it. I will say the response of Bella Manny I will say this what's holding you back from having a kid. I don't know the whole thing I don't know everything involved. I I have to say I I am so in love with My two children like beyond I'm gonna stop you there guys. This is setting up for something electric ahead

But Big time but big time a big time big time a big time a baby girl. That's what she is. Um, I like I Like I will tell people one thing and if like this will be like what to like if this is the thing that like breaks the camel's back You know the straw that breaks the camel's back It would make sense. I I will never Sleep the same ever again. Yeah Period. Yeah, no matter how old they get Like I like you need to understand having kids. It's fucking incredibly beautiful rewarding fun, but but it's not

same time But it's not but like You think about it like your last night of sleep. You'll never get like you'll always worry about like where are they? What are they doing? Who are they with? Yeah, are they doing? You know what I mean? You know, it's actually funny like Again not comparing the two but when I first got charlie, like, you know, like I mean like I don't have a baby. Would I have a dog? No? But like when I first got him

There was so many things that had to change about like my day or whatever Definitely like slept differently because I was like I if I can hear him. He's Choking and about to die. Yeah, and if I can't hear him, it's because he's already dead. Yeah So like that I didn't sleep and then the day that my sister was like leaving because she was like, oh, I gotta go pick up my car Like at vw because it was like getting like service or something And I was like, oh, I'll watch him if you want and she's like, yeah, sure So before she left the house, she was just like picking up certain things like blocking everything I'm like, this is exactly what I would do when I would have to leave the house and leave charlie by himself

I'm like, all right, I've got a dog proof this, you know Yeah, but like a dog a dog. I mean obviously there's a difference and I know you know that but like a dog like if they get into it You're like, you know what I mean? Like if I found my child chewing on, you know I'd be like, all right. This is a problem. Yeah, you know, and I'm I have to say That's why you got to put kids in cages when you leave the house. I honestly like wouldn't be against it Like what's wrong with a kid in a cage realistically? Uh Geez got him

What's wrong with kids in cages at the border? Honestly, right? You're not allowed to make that joke yo, you're way too quiet An upper class But that is funny. No, I I obviously don't think any people should be in cages. We're we're joking. We're having a good time Everyone's you know, they need to know a squeezy this but Yeah, I wouldn't be against it. Let's call it a playpen That's pretty much what we call it. I My mom and her house has a playpen for the baby. That's what it is. I actually said to she I was like

What if I got to take a dump like am I gonna have to hold them while shitting? I feel bad for this guy I take pups and she's like just put him in the playpen. I was like, I'm not doing Just leave him in the cage. Basically is what she said. Yeah She's like he's gonna cry but you know, I was like, I'm not doing that I have like there have been ways where like my like she'll be like In her like little pillow thing like laying down and like taking the bottle And I'll like put a pill like I'll like make this like contraption So the bottle just kind of stays at an angle where she can drink it

Yeah, so I can like run to the bathroom real quick or like get something from the kitchen Yeah kids kids I'm basically half a dad now. I watched a kid for 45 minutes. You can do it. That's what I do You can absolutely do it. Um, so yeah, anyway, there's a there's a big story going around right now. Um, uh, and it's about the The oh, I don't know if we could say the Fauci ouchy. Yeah So, uh, Nicki Minaj tweeted this thing I've heard about about the Which hold on let's start there. Yeah I don't think

Nicki Minaj Female rapper. Mm-hmm. A lot of people one of the greatest, you know I I guess I don't know. I don't think I'm the one to judge that. Um, not known for her Contributions to the political realm. I guess. Well, I don't know that this is science realm I don't know that it's like political, but it was it was just it was just funny. Mm. I'll say you better Watch your fucking step because the barbs will eat your fucking asshole from the inside out. What's a barb? It's the barbies her her. Oh, is that like the beehive? Yeah. Oh, yes I'm not I'm not saying anything bad about them. Oh the beehive came from me multiple times really ruin my shit

Well, they didn't obviously actually one of them actually, uh They complimented me without even realizing what would they say? So one time I tweeted this thing about Beyonce and I was just kind of like I Haven't really liked a Beyonce song since like love on top. That song's a fucking Let's do this fire. So That song and then like I wasn't really big on the whole, uh, whatever album was like Formation lemonade or lemonade or whatever the fuck like it wasn't like crazy about it. Love on top, though

Really good. Um, but anyway, so I tweeted that and bro. I don't know how but the beehive got like Or the beehive. What do they call it beehive beehive? I don't know something like that, but like they got wind of it and that was the end of me People were tweeting me like how you have millions of people that watch your shit, joey What do you mean? You don't know how of course I don't think that me and Beyonce have an overlap of like viewers frank. I think that you are a popular internet Person, you know personalities the term I was looking for anything you tweet someone will catch wind of well, whatever

So they got ahold of it and they ran with it and then people were like you're just You're fucking irrelevant Who is this guy's a joke and then just started flaming me and then one person's like you're just jealous because you're worth like 120th of what she was worth I was like you think I got 20 million dollars. I fucking wish. I'm like damn. Oh, it's like 20 mil take that Yo, I immediately googled. I was like, what's her net worth? What is her net worth? She's got to be more than jz, right? Uh, yeah, I think so. I hope so. No, no, no not more than jz not now, but like off of music Beyonce net worth

Beyonce net worth 400 204 That's just a little bit. What's what's a 20th of that? Oh, I don't know 10.4. I'll take that too Jaycee's 1.4 billion. So there's a little discrepancy and money there. Why is he worth? Why what does he have? Mad shit, bro. He had ace of spades that he sold He had um Motorhead Different by the way

He did not make that song. Yeah, no Um, yeah, but he sold that for like 300 million or something his stake in that he had title I think he sold the shares in that too He's just like ace of spades was the the the champagne. Yeah. Hmm super pops Have you had it? I have that's good It's champagne things that are like really expensive. You'll never have you have to like like Sort of convince yourself that it's worth it. There's no way it is. Yeah, but it's like it's the same thing with diamonds though

It's like it's a rock. It's a it's a shiny rock. You know, I'm paying thousands of dollars for this thing There's nothing like that I'm going to be able to tell in my fucking You know expertise where I'll be able to tell the difference. You can tell more of a difference in like T-shirts, you know what I'm saying? Like with champagne It's a lot harder for me to reel or like even with wine like an expensive wine versus a non expensive wine There's been times to do blind taste test for fun and be like, oh this bottle is $10 and I liked it the most Rather than these other ones. I don't have a fucking palette. I'm sure there's fucking someone out there going crazy right now Yeah, I reason how could you not feel the earthy oak?

I recently because I you know, you know how I am with my tea I've been watching a lot of you know, reading into and researching a lot of tea And there's teas that are worth like for like an ounce Like thousands of dollars and it's like I don't think I have the knowledge to be able to taste that and be like wow Yeah, so the champagne it's good. It's you know Actually, the only thing that I can really tell the difference is in is like uh whiskey

Like I can tell the difference in certain ways. I can tell in whiskey uh tequila and um vodka Vodka, I wouldn't be able to pick anything out. No, yes, you would if I got you Georgie vodka and then I got you gray goose. You would definitely be able to tell the difference joey. Yes, that's like all right, but Georgie is like Gray goose and a different vodka. No way that isn't George. No, I know I'm not I'm but I'm saying like between like high end low end vodka You definitely would be able to champagne. I don't know like a champagne is all like I like champagne. I love champagne. I love champagne. I love it. All right back to nicky. Nicki Minaj

Yeah, so she tweeted this thing and it's just kind of interesting, you know about the uh Really quick. Do you best Nicki Minaj impression? No, you do it No, you do it. I don't have for Nicki Minaj. I'm not good at impressions, bro. You can do it That's like the old school Nicki Minaj there. Is that like not the new one I don't really know. I haven't seen her. She just gave birth, didn't she? Yeah, to uh to a baby good. Well, that's how that works. Yeah, yes, it is

Okay, she tweeted uh my cousin and Trinidad won't get the Because his friend got it and became impotent Uh his his testicles became swollen His friend was weeks away from getting married now the girl called off the wedding So just pray on it and make sure you're comfortable with your decision not bullied Huh? I'll say this We're not going to talk about

We're not going to politicize this. I don't I don't you know, obviously like Don't be bullied Good. I didn't any sort of good idea. Yeah. Um And I you know, I don't I'm not going to force my views on the vaccine on anybody uh I'm more focused on the balls You know, I I could say I'll say this If the vaccine made your balls fatter

I mean, what kind of fat though? I don't want fat nuts as much as I want just like Just fatter balls. I want longer nuts. You want long way to have short balls They are very close to the base I will say that so they're all tucked up. So it's very neat down there like a peach. They're like a oh, they're angry The hair on it's like this or it's like it's like this the hair the hair the skin on it's like this Yeah, like Clint Eastwood. Yeah. Well, that's Robert De Niro. Uh, yeah, that's Robert De Niro, right? No, but also I have a question about this like her cousin Trinidad

Won't get it because his friend got it and then the so I'm very confused by this the friend Got the vaccine their balls became swollen and because of that his fiance was like I can't do this There were other how bad are these balls? I'm more concerned about and we'll get to that But like I'm more concerned about like this is the classic like Yo, my cousin's friend From school works at nintendo and told us that super smash brothers 12 is coming out and I'm getting an advanced copy You know like it's that fucking classic like what the fuck are you talking? I'm just saying like it's that classic like

Oh, my cousins From another country's friend is dating a girl whose best friends with Vanessa Hudgens. Yeah. Yeah, you're like That's the first fucking red flag. Like if anyone starts a story like that I'm not saying that this didn't happen to this person, but oh, I think I'm saying that. Oh, yeah I think I'm saying that you're laying that down right there. I think so. I think like um I yeah, I don't think that you get the vaccine and then your balls swell up All I'm saying is if this didn't happen better way to convey this message You can't be like my cousin's friend from another country told me this it's like that you already lost me

It's like two degrees of separation max. I mean forget about that I like forget about like if this is true or not like I don't even like really care I more so care about Why this woman called off the wedding Like yo your balls are too big to matter Yo, your cock doesn't work. I mean, I guess I guess I get the cock doesn't work thing Like if you're impotent, well, no impotent means you still have kids, right? No, I think that that's exactly what it means No, I think infertile means you can't have children impotent means like you have like ed

I think impotence just means like your cock doesn't work perfectly anymore impotent Lacking the power or ability to change. Oh, well, I guess No, you put importance Fuck So like his dick, you know Pop a pop a bluetooth in his mouth My guys, you know discreet shipping. You don't gotta know a damn thing

I mean, yeah, I guess so that's what I'm saying. There were bigger issues here. This girl was looking for a way out She's like, oh your dick is like not working when I need it to now Okay, I have no other choice. He's he's got swollen balls. That's a that's a tough way to leave someone You know my balls are getting fatter my dick's getting limper and you're gonna leave me right now Right, like we're having a through thick and thin. We're about to just do vows, baby Thick and thin not swollen and fat It's like, you know It's just kind of crazy that like literally like blue balls make your nuts fat and hurt

Do they I I can tell you my experience of blue balls made them fat and hurt really I've only had it once I've had it a couple times Not fun. Yeah, it's not sick. It sucks. Yeah, but This guy now just has like more blue balls like what if it what if it was just like he just had a build-up, but just just just come and then she was like Figure it out. I'm not marrying you. I mean you could you could spank the monkey. What's it shake the monkey I thought it was like shake the I think it's choke the chicken or spank the monkey, but there's also like a like there's like a

Shaked a dragon somewhere to dragon. I've never heard of the dragon fight the dragon Chase the dragon. That would be no. That's that's drugs. Yeah. Yeah my bad Chasing the magic dragon. That's the that's drugs. That's heroin. Yeah, that's drugs. I always get those mixed up Drugs and masturbation you get jerking off and doing drugs mixed up the expressions Yeah, I smoke the pipe so just pray on it and make sure you're comfortable with your decision not bullied I agree with that part. Yeah, go ahead. Make sure you're comfortable with your decision There's one thing I will say that's kind of funny, right? I love when people

Say like, you know, I'm I'll get the vaccine when I've done enough research. I'm just like you said the word yo Um with like when I've done enough research and you're just like Are you like diving into scientific literature like every night? No, what is the research? That's the thing is like no one ourselves included Really have I mean actually not necessarily ourselves included because I I did get a degree in understanding data. Here we go Uh, we don't like the normal person should not need a fucking master's degree in order to understand Simple information. I just don't like well forget about that. Let me do it. You know what I mean? Like there's always that one family that has that one person like I'll figure it out and it's like, oh, okay

Well, it's just like yeah. Yeah, I don't know It's just funny when people are talking about like research and I'm like, what research are you like? Are you in the library like burning the midnight oil in there? They're using that fucking thing where they go through the newspaper clippings from like fucking like 100 years ago a thimble No, you know what I'm talking about. It's like, oh, oh, oh, yeah, wait Oh You know what I'm talking about. I do I do Uh, no, there is something seriously funny though and it was like he was weeks away from getting married now

The girl called off the wedding. She was like, hold on. Your balls are way too fat. You got fat nuts I'm out. I was in here when you have normal nuts. Now you have fat nuts. I'm done I mean, I get it. I guess to an extent like, you know Each person has like a thing and like if someone goes and like like what if he met this girl and then she was just like listen I Really like it's like if Becca tomorrow were to like just like Ours herself and mustard. I'd be like, yeah, we're done. I have to leave you now

but like With her thing when they did it like listen, I'm fucking so into you. I will marry you. I just need you to just know fat nuts Just keep your nuts where they are We also don't know if that was a condition that she kind of put on the entire thing before they really got serious She could have been like, listen, I have a thing about fat balls And if you get them, I gotta get out of it. Like p is like fat nuts just giving her like PTSD Like she was accidentally humped by a dog once. I just had just fucking big old knockers. Yo, why don't but yo Some dogs the other day. I saw dogs have big nuts. Dude pitbulls have

Balls on them bro. You remember I'm walking around. I'm like, yo, doesn't it hurt? I don't know if they were real It might have been fake. You remember van wilder that fucking bulldog. Yeah, dude. Why do these fat dogs? Have the fattest balls. I was I was walking behind this dog and I'm like I don't even want to see that like I think it's too much. You got to put a bra on these things Yeah, I don't want to bra on those balls. I don't want to see these put something something like that's that's too much None put a thong on the dog. I don't want to see animal like reproductive organs But if they're there, I have to stare at them So if your dog is walking with his balls out, I have to look at nothing else

But his balls no heart it is to ignore a pair of balls even in the even in the human Bro, anyone here that has a cat you've stared in an asshole more than anyone ever. Yeah, dude. Those are weird Bro cat they're like bullseyes They they're bullseyes and like you can like look in them and you're like, yo, I can see in this cat Yeah, it's like a kaleidoscope It's like those like frogs that are like you could see their organs and stuff like that, you know, like they're like transparent Like salamanders or something. They're they have those like they're like transparent It's like, you know, if you're walking by like a house of glass windows, like you're gonna look in

Yeah, I'm gonna see you like what kind of setup you got in the kitchen. Exactly. I want to see if you have your asshole out I'm gonna be staring at it for a long time It's also very hard for me as much as I don't enjoy it when I'm at the gym If there's a man in the locker room who's naked, I'm like all eyes on him Well, I gotta see these fucking cocks and balls. I try to play it off though. Like I'm not like like being like I'm looking at it like a hobo erotic way. Yeah, I'm just kind of like I'll just be like if like the clock is over there and he's naked over there. I'll just be like, what time is it? Yeah, you know and look back. You have to

I don't know why you're curious. Why do I have to see dicks? I think like, why do I gotta look at a dick? Like if there's a dick out. I'm like, oh Ball I'm That's what you're gonna call stop, bro. What the fuck? Yeah, god Yo, pull your dick out in front of your friends. I think and see if they don't look at it. I mean, they're gonna go. Yo, what the Dude, that's what they do. They check. They'd be like, yo, put your dick. I could still see it. Put your dick away Yeah, but why why I think it was like do we want to see where we stand? I think it was so ingrained. We're curious species Do we is it because we want to know if we have a bigger penis and they don't think it's about bigger? I think it's just like

You know, it's there. It's the same thing. Like if there's a mystery if there's a bowl of m&m's I'm not only gonna eat it. I'm gonna stick my fucking whole hand in it. Okay. We're on different pace No, we're not if there's a like if there's big and balls like we don't want to see it, but like it's like We have to Okay, you know Yeah, I don't like I don't enjoy it, but I definitely like Can't help myself. You have to gotta see it Yeah, I actually had a gay dream last night

An ancestral gay dream Keith no my cousin Mike. Huh, okay So Pete's brother keeps a lot hotter than Keith. I'll say that a Pete's Smoky Pete's brother. Yes his brother. I there wasn't like a gayness Like you weren't fucking no, no, no, but apparently in the dream We had just had sex or something and then we were at a family party and he like wanted to tell everyone Oh, and I was like, what are you doing? And he was like telling like kids who I've never met these kids. That's that's probably gonna get him on a registry

Younger kids that's gonna definitely get him on a registry Younger cousins is what I meant. Okay. I'm just being not that makes any better But just being like, no, yeah, we did this and I was like, why are you telling people that very confusing? Haven't told them yet. Probably won't but I'll tell Pete he'll find out now I mean, well, Pete doesn't watch this. Well, neither does Mike. Yeah, so we're pretty much fine. Yeah, we're all right Pretty sure one of my aunts watches this though. Oh, really? Yeah So she'll you know Christmas will be a little weird. Well, it's all right actually Thanksgiving, but it's okay There's football on I think like it's okay to have a gay dream as long as you're not like

Waking up horny, you know what I mean? Like yeah, I didn't wake up like yo I need to see Mike like I talked about this like a couple weeks ago Like you and I like I had a gay dream that we like we were gonna announce to the world that we were gay Right kind of similar. Okay And we were like I wasn't dreaming of us having you know hooking up. Yeah, but afterward I woke up And I was like wow, I was gay and then I went back to sleep. I didn't wake up like I need to talk to him. Yeah, you know like I need to work some things out She's like Becca. We need to have a a chat. No. Yeah. No, I didn't I did not have one of those. Thank god

because you know Couldn't do it Frank. Sorry. Yeah. Well, I wouldn't I wouldn't blame you Yeah Look at me By the way, I took the liberty of since we're on the topic of fat balls Looking up the heaviest balls ever recorded. Oh, let's see them. Do you want to give a guess? Heaviest balls everyone out there. Well, it's probably a comment guess probably in England So it's like kilograms or something. No, no, I converted to pounds. Oh, okay. Um, I'll say like four pounds

Did you see the answer? No, okay good Um Well, it's not four pounds. Okay. It's a little higher than four pounds. Okay Four pounds I'm thinking four pounds is a lot. So I'll say like Six and a half hundred and 32 pounds stop. Yeah, stop 132 pounds pull them up now guy had you've never seen this video No, how would I have seen a video of the fattest balls ever? because

life I don't know It's on youtube this sounds like this would be on like a second porn website Stop Oh boy In order to prepare for me For those are fat balls. That's a ball I love how they hired this guy who usually talks about cheetahs to talk about this guy's balls. He's got a he's got a okay, wait

Is he gonna eat a meal off of his balls right now? I mean, I would if I had fat balls like that. That's a table. That's a fucking So eating salisbury steak and rice pilaf off of his balls Josh don't put this in the video because we probably can't yeah But there's a video of a guy with the fattest balls and then he puts like a tablecloth over his balls and eats a meal off of it Like rice pilaf. Oh, you mean like edit this out or like don't put the video video. No, just don't put the video I'm describing. Gotcha. I don't think you're recording. I'm not. Oh, okay. Well good. Yeah, josh. Don't put that in Yeah, those were those were some Fucking nuts. Yeah, so 130 pounds. That's 32. That's really uncomfortable

Like I think of like how like like sensitive my balls are and if like I was living with them Just like hanging from like I guess I am but like we're like they can scrape against the floor That's gotta be the worst. It's like having gigantic fat boobs Bro, you can ruin this guy's fucking year. Just just flick them in the nuts I don't think you would even feel it. I think in more so it's just like pulling his whole body I would assume that the bigger they are the more sensitive they are that's gotta be how that works I don't think so. I don't know that. Oh my god, you know, sir. I think it's like what's the what's the Oh, I think we you know like four percent of women can orgasm just from nipple play

Good for them only four percent though. I mean that's four out of a hundred Mm-hmm. That's you just be like this like just Eventually, you know, I mean I get hey everyone's got a thing they get some there There are people that orgasm off of fucking fingering like Soffits in a roller coaster and shit like that. What's a soffit? It's a word I know it's like a it's like a building term a soffit. Yeah, I believe you you should Okay, you've no reason to think I'm lying. I thought a soffit before you were going to say roller coaster was like something on the body

I'm maybe maybe there's like a body term for a soffit, but uh People think people can come from anything. Do you I know we've talked about this a little bit, but like Right now if you just sat close your eyes, can you make yourself come? No way mean either I could definitely give myself like hard. I mean maybe but like no. Yes. I I need like You know Todd here, Joe I don't even know what you mean. You know exactly what I mean. You need what touching. Yeah physical touch I would need physical touch. None of this like

If someone was like talking to you Yeah, like I'm gonna fucking just ruin that dick. Cool. It won't get hard I mean, maybe but I don't think so Bro doesn't take much for me to just be like I'm at ease At ease soldier. Okay. Oh, yeah, exactly like sir You know, it's like when a when a sergeant walks into a room. What? Oh, yeah line up Everyone line up. It's all that's all I need. That's all you need Yeah, man, that's gotta be good for you. You just got a good old. You're not you're you clearly what happened to

Nicki Minaj's cousin's friend from Trinidad didn't help happen to you. Yeah, he probably got a different sort of vaccine You said it again fuck God youtube's gonna be like what they're gonna put like Fact checker stuff on me. There's exactly that's exactly what's gonna happen. Yeah Uh, all right, let's get to the sponsors for today's show. These are good friends. Good old friends of the show Uh liquid iv liquid iv. I've been crushing it. I actually I have two actually I hit them up and I was like guys need Uh, another care package and guess what?

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That's ten dollars off a smart electric toothbrush at get quip.com slash basement spelled g e t q u i p dot com Slash basement go get it brush your mouth plus your face. All right brush your tongue Apparently people are doing that You ever brush your tongue? Uh, we went over we went over this I don't know. Yeah. No, I mean I've never I I did it the other day because we talked about it And I get egged really hard and I was like, why don't I hate like I I'm I again strong gallery flex But like it's just the thought of doing it. Just hate all right. I'm gonna try

I really don't like sticking my fingers in my mouth or whatever. We try this every couple weeks. So I've never I don't do this You do it. You can get your fucking whole hand in there. What's up? I'm scared you got it See I'm not that's it. How far how far in did you get didn't side turn sideways and do it? Okay I'm pathetic. It's kind of sad You're a grown man. You should be able to take down your finger joe. How does that come with men man age? You barely got it to like you got to like right there once I get to the back My throat just starts going

Yeah, it's mental. It's got to be all mental too. If you were sleeping and I did that You'd probably get a little more down. I'd go right to the papers Into the police. I go down to the station if you did that. All right. That was what you're doing Well, well we discovered some new That was a lot easier than I thought it would be like we'll see done. Listen, I've never in my life Like ever had like a gay moment where I felt like attracted to someone of the same sex Oh, I've had so many but I would be

A catch. Did I ever tell you except for my butt? That sucks. Yeah. Yeah, my butt sucks His heiny is wack. My heiny sucks. Um, did I ever tell you about the the Attractive waiter in Miami? No, were you like attracted? So like we we uh, we went to this place. I want to know more. It's so fucking funny Uh, but we went to this restaurant In Miami and We were having dinner And this waiter walks by he's built like guest on

Like just wide back small waist very well groomed and like Just minus, you know, like the like rapey vibes that people get from guest on. Was he raping? He was not a very nice person. I don't really remember guest on I'll be honest. Okay. Um, but anyway Uh, so I was like, damn, I do this fucking probably crushing it. You know what I mean? And then um, so you're just like making jokes about that And also when he comes over to our table, bro, it was so funny because he we like ordered already and then We had just like finished the conversation. I'm like, dude, this guy's fucking probably like blah blah blah He comes over and he puts a pizza that we didn't order on the table

And we all were trying to say like, oh, we didn't order that. He knows what he's doing Well, like we tried to say that we didn't order that because we ordered a different kind of pizza But everyone was like fumbling on the words like, oh, we didn't wait. We don't oh, I'm sorry And they're like, oh, we didn't order this and he's like, oh, okay, no problem And then he like took it to the back and then I was like Are we all nervous right now? You had a gay moment. It was so funny You definitely had one place had good pizza too. I don't remember what it was called. What was better than a pizza? I show she now we always talking about it was so fucking funny. That is funny. Yeah

No, no, no, I do you remember a couple of years ago that beauty the beast movie came out With um the live action beauty and the beast movie the Ariana Grande soundtrack thing I guess the one with uh hermene and uh gastar And josh gad is lafoo. Oh, yes. Yeah. Lafoo. Lafoo. That's his name But the reason I brought that up is because in that the director that movie was like, we're putting Gay characters in our movies now. This character has an exclusively gay moment in like an interview. They were like, yeah He's gay. He has a gay moment and in the gay like in the moment

It was him like smiling at a guy and they were like, he's gay So fucking stupid. Wait, is it like the clock or something? No. Lafoo is like gaston's like boy Oh, like he's like guy like the one like the guy that's like hanging with him So you just say you don't like gaston, but he's got a gay in his crew. It's pretty progressive I mean, you know, but he is a little You know, he's aggressive a little bit. He says too much. You're going to marry me And you're like, well, free will. Yeah, I don't I don't want to do that. I'm going to go with the monster that just kidnapped me Yeah, you know

That's a wack gaston is bro. Someone was kidnapped by a beast Yeah, what's that? What's the thing that they call where it's like the Stockholm syndrome Stockholm This girl was like, yo, like I'm good with the person that just like try to murder me Not the person that If they like chill out a little bit might learn to be a not a piece of shit I know you have a great body and all the women in the town love you, but I'm going to marry the bear Yeah, basically the dancing bear. Yeah, the guy has fangs. Yeah, I'm going to him You know, he's probably killed a couple of peeps. I think once you heard like no one fights like gaston

No one fucks like gaston. It's like, hey man. It's like, yeah, take it. I've met a guy like you before Everyone can do the things that you do right, you know, especially the guy that probably has a Fat fat cock who the beast the beast and he's super rich Got a castle. Yo, you can't be poor with a castle. I tried way too Way too big of a dinner table that guy. Oh, well if listen If I can ask you for anything in my life. Yeah, when you own a mansion, right Please get a big dinner table that like it will be like it'll be like I have to squint to see what you're eating

I'm not saying super long, but like at least 30 feet That's long 20 Jesus Christ at least 20 feet. That's also very long. I think That's not that bad. I'm not a big judge of I'm awful at it too. I don't know how big that is I would love to have a big dinner table and then just have like My wife sit on the other side

And like there's like flowers in the middle. How you doing honey? Yeah, how's the salmon? Yeah, you know here put your arms out Full stretch so that's that's about 12 feet. So imagine another one of us. That's basically 20 feet That's a long tape. That's a big old tabby. Yeah Uh, I don't know if I could do that. I think we can you're gonna have to have a big dining room. I mean, it's your house So it will be big Let's hope so Um, all right. Anyway, we're gonna end this episode by talking about Uh

No, oh, no, we're not we're not we're gonna talk about the Met Gala Met Gala So there's a lot the Met Gala for those who don't know it's the one day a year that celebrities only one that they do this Only one time everyone likes um, but they go out and dress like a bunch of fucking assholes Yeah, they never do it any other basically the one day a year where celebrities are like, let's all do what gaga did from 2009 to 2014. Yeah um, and uh Some people look good

Some people you're like, what are you doing? I don't I gotta be honest with you spoiler I don't entirely understand the Met Gala. Is it a fashion show? Is it a party? Is it a show? I think they watch a movie. Do they all get in there and they're like, yo, let's put on like fucking like hocus pocus Yeah, let's all watch Mighty Ducks 2 which Would make any party instantly better. Yeah, dude. I was when I was on the flight back from Arizona I downloaded Mighty Ducks 2 and heavyweights

Sign you up. Easiest flight of my life. That's a good old flight. Yeah, I suggest doing that. But anyway, um Yeah, so the Met Gala, I think it's just like a Bless, why did you sneeze like a Shakespearean actor? I don't know Anyway, I think I think it's like a charity event or something for who? kids Dying somewhere Those things where it's like for 39 cents a day

No, I don't know. Oh, it was way more. I heard that it's like 30 grand to get in Where are you going? You can go. It's in new york, isn't it? You have to be invited Bro, you're gonna tell me if you also would not pay 30 000 dollars to fucking go to this joey not yet Joey no, I would only go if I like knew a bunch of people joey If I was like cool as rihanna, I'd go if fucking If you're you're gonna hold on hold on i'm put all right guys first of all No, I would not spend 30 000 dollars on the table if your fucking agent called you was like, yo We can get you and a plus one into the Met Gala. Yeah

You would be sitting at a table with Harry Styles ariana grande Who else do the kids like? I don't know Dua Lipas You will you're gonna tell me that you wouldn't fucking go. I would not pay 30 000 dollars joey That would just be an insane amount of money joey What you're gonna tell me you wouldn't go no you fucking liar for 30 grand bro. Yes, you would to do what?

I know you would you went joey. Do you know where you went last week or two weeks ago? You went to watch a tennis match People go to the u.s. Open people that have money go to the u.s. Open Frankie. Do you think that's normies go? You're talking about 140 dollars and you're talking about 30 000 dollars bro Look look at a u.s. Open match and there's only rich people there There's no fucking normal people there because you only see the people who are sitting courtside that obviously have billions of dollars Nope, nope You're gonna if it's rowdy up there joey. I

If you're gonna fucking tell me you went to a secret underground restaurant the other week. It was above ground wherever it was You're gonna tell me you wouldn't go to this you're a fucking liar, but onward and upward keep going if it was like 5000 I would do it you're crazy. I think you would definitely go for 30 000 No way, and if you if you think that rihanna is paying to get into this event You're out of your fucking mind. There's no shot that these tickets cost a damn thing Well, I think that it's just like a it's like the the money from it goes to a charity It's not like they're paying to go they're paying because it's like a thing

I don't think it makes us feel better about whatever. Yeah, what they're going to do So some of the also probably some of the people who are like the outfits they pay for the tickets as well so like so this is Ridiculous. All right. So the first one we have here is asap rocky and Rihanna asap rocky looks like one of the best cereals in the entire world cap and crunch berries cap and crunch berry boy He looks very cozy. I will say he also looks like he stole that quilt from fucking grandmas That does look like the roof from hansel and gretel. Nothing. I'm telling you right now I would check in with the baronstein bears because he got that from one of them and are they okay? Yeah, I don't know

And rihanna looks very comfy. She honestly just looks like she This is what my dog does when I try to change the sheets to my bed Like as soon as they come off the corners, he just gets in the middle and wraps and stuff She looks like she was like, yo, like I'm only going if I can just wrap a blanket around me And go that's rihanna. That's how rihanna talks If I could just wrap a blanket around me and be as fucking comfortable as possible Hey Yeah, was that rihanna? I don't know

Now I don't know what song you were just saying but that's what this is not that bad. I mean asap rocky What are you doing? No, I mean, I don't think this is that bad considering there's some hitters here Um, but asap rocky bro I you know, I think it's I think it's cool that they both went comfy Yeah, I mean, I mean it looks like he has something underneath it. Yeah, I feel like there's a surprise underneath there There's got to be he's got to be if he's not butt naked under there. He's doing it all wrong Well, he's gonna eventually have to open that up. It's also very hot in new york. Are these people not sweating? I mean, they're going into a probably very well conditioned room. That's fair

I don't think that they're you know, if they're paying 30 000 to get in they better get in and be as comfy as they want Yeah, and I can almost guarantee that the people that wear these things go in and then instantly change Probably and I think you just kind of sit around you get drunk with celebrities and you take selfies with like the elite and just kind of hang out That's got to be like equal parts fun equal parts miserable. No, I think it's mad fun Bro, I would have a blast at this thing. That's why you would go not for 30 grand You would go for 30 grand maybe in two years. I would go for 30 grand maybe in two months you'd go That might go all right next

This is kim kardashian this she went as a dementor. Yes She went as a She looks like a shadow. Yeah, what is she doing? Oh, it's a melting silhouette Oh, like she's a silhouette of herself. Honestly, that's kind of cool though Like I get that. What's the head part? That's like very star-worsy. I get yeah She's like she looks like a twi a twi like a tweet twi like for all my star wars fans out there You know like this is one of the ones. Oh my god. Is that hair? Ridiculous if that that's not that can't be real. No, obviously not. That's horse hair. Yeah, it's a horse hair

um To go with that fucking Wagon she's pulling. Oh my god, dude. That's a horse drawn cat This like yes, this is ridiculous the face part doesn't need to be covered I like it But like I I get I that is the one that makes the most sense like I can see that and be like Oh, she's like a fucking shadow of herself or something like no, I think that it was just very different She's like I'm gonna wear this whole thing again. No very sweaty

How did people know it was her? Are they just like yo kids coming? I think the bud I mean anyone could stuff a bud I mean, I think I would know I could stuff a bud to make it look like that I'm saying if this is if it turns out this was not kim Kardashian people it's gonna be incredible That would be cool. People are just like, oh, yeah, it was me. I carried a ladder and got into the event Yeah, I dressed as a shadow But this is this is way better than asap and rihanna I'll I'll feel like I'd be able to if you like plan this well enough to wear this next year

But just pull up in a limo And have like security go say goodbye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. And I just walked through the event and I just feel like I'm kim kardashian Or not. Yeah, I just pick a person. I would not I'll tell you the way that I look my body right now I they would instantly know I wasn't kim kardashian. Yeah, they know I wasn't her either But like I'd be like, who's that fucking gross fucking melting pot? Bitch We're like, it's me. Frank alvarez co-host of the basement yard. I'm the co-host of the basement yard. Uh, okay next This is your boy

Why is this my boy? I don't know Dan Levy Dan Levy Levi. I don't know but That's a gay map Is that a gay map a map? I mean, I I have always considered maps to be very gay Um, what why I don't know. So I think that's two men kissing with like I think that's like that's gotta be like That's gotta be that's the u.s. The bottom is the u.s. And they're kissing in canada. Oh, yeah Oh, yeah, yeah, that makes sense two men kissing in the northern hemisphere. Yep, which makes it cold

Yeah, that's gotta be a little bit of a frigid kiss, but but where it gets hot is where it's hotter So that makes sense was dicks all wet. It's so the ocean down there. I guess this is so fucking stupid This is a lot. This is like a parachute Sort of very frayed Can I can I like who saw like and was like, I know what you should wear. Yeah I what's the message here? Did you pull up like what the messages are? Yeah, those boots suck the boots the boots are out of control The boots are a little out of control. I'm big on pomp and flash in my outfit. You guys know me

I mean not right now because I had to work before this but like I love me a hawaiian This is that's pomp and flash a hawaiian shirt. Yes It's like purple and orange a bigger piece of shit I've been wearing hawaiian shirts since before everyone else was joey. So fuck off not the hawaiians He's got a point idiot. He's got and not retired cops. Yeah Yeah, um But yeah, I mean this is a bit much. I don't know if I could pull off those kinds of sleeves That's a lot for me to be honest. This is very hot

Like I do like the kissing map men. I would say his face looks great. That's a good-looking guy That's a really good-looking dude. Great hair. Good for you I've never seen that show. I mean I tried watching the first episode. I couldn't like this creek. Yeah I've watched a couple episodes. It's pretty funny. I I enjoy everyone very culty Not the show but like the people who watch it. Yeah the fan base that I get I like Eugene I like his dad. I like kathryn O'Hara big Eugene like Chris Elliott. Yeah, everyone in that show is kind of pretty good Not bad. Um, but yeah, yeah, this is annoying. This is not the one for me So what would be the one that you what would be your outfit?

So far. Yeah, what would you wear? I'd wear the kim one easy. Um, I'll probably go asap. Really? Yeah, I like I like having big quilts on me. It'd get you hungry, wouldn't it? Yeah, yeah, okay next we have Okay, yeah, indiana boneser I don't even look at the hat. Yeah fucking, uh, jennifer lopez with One of the strongest legs I've ever seen in my life. That's a strong leg That is a quad that will hurt someone. You know what? I did see you know who that is in the background

Never would have been able to tell hailey steinfeld Oh her bro. That does not look like her at all Well forget about hailey steinfeld. We got front and center jennifer lopez. You piece of shit She always I feel like she's worn like this dress before She looks like she looks like she looks like the new villain in the new tomb like tomb raider game Yeah, or she shows up, but she's like where is the tomb? She's french. I was gonna say what is this like evil french people. She is french um, no, this just looks like uh

Like the mummy returns kind of yeah, yeah, you know what I mean? What do they call her in that movie who the female mummy? Oh, dude, what the fuck you think I remember that? I would hope so it's like 1999 don't bring up the reference if you can't complete it I'm just saying yeah, this looks like that choker by the way. That's that's I kind of like that You're into it. I would play like some like some symbols I mean you just pulled this up because it's jaylo. I did you're a big jaylo guy. I am She's got I mean, this is a pretty a flowy dress with a leg out. This is a jaylo staple This is a jail. Yeah, you got to show off those legs. Where's ben. I don't see ben

Well, he's probably just wearing a suit or a t-shirt or something I would hope so because if he showed up in like a fucking like if you showed up in the same dress Now we're talking. That'd be kind of cool That honestly might be the move for one of these shows like if I'm ever like super famous and just like wear like a Like a dress like that my with my leg out. That would be good I would have to do a way more like you ever see uh, it was like 99 or something the creators of south park showed up to a In dresses and and like they tried asking them about it. They're like, it's a great night They just didn't they were like so high. I'll like I think they like dropped acid or something

That's great. And they were like, so what do you wear? And they're like We're really excited to be here. I just avoided all in talking about I love that. All right next Oh, this is actually the vma's. This is doja cat and she's sporting a She's brandishing a weapon. Oh, oh wow she She's fucking she's got a knife How'd they let her in with the fucking down? She's got a knife. He's got the dragon dagger She's about to summon the dragon's orde and read a repulsa horse dress dragon dagger

mood ring Chair on the head. Okay. Let's go from the top down chair upside down chair. Why? I think it was supposed. I mean obviously she was like, you know, she has a sense of humor Is she like a lion tamer? Why is she dressed like this? I don't know why these things would go together The dress looks great. I honestly think that people should have more weapons as as accessories Don't know about that one near joe. What's her name? Elon musk's wife. I don't know. Whatever she is Had a fucking sword that was an ak-47 melted down into a sword I need to see this right now. It was a big sword. Who's I didn't know elon musk had a

wife her name was like her name's like You're gonna laugh grimes What elon musk wife Tallulah her name is tallulah joe. No, I don't think that's her Oh, this is her She's young too She's definitely she looks like she needs help Oh, is this the one that like they named their kid like she can join?

Yeah, see the see the sword bro. What look at that. That is fucking awesome. Look at that fucking sword That's a sharp sword get that away from her face. Yeah, that's very dangerous actually I'm gonna screenshot this so that josh can uh Put it into the episode here one thing I've learned about swords. Don't put them in for someone's face like that You're gonna poke out an eye. Yeah, so she wore she she's this is stupid Doja cat doja cat looks good here though minus the I mean the chairs a bit much the chair makes no sense I need to know like because all of the people that do this are like, oh, there's a political statement to them What is this one? I think she was just fucking around. There's no way

It's a it's a chair, you know, this is dumb next Shit Shit do I have any mark? Oh, yeah, I do. Oh doja cat again VMAs I think this is This is just like she's being eaten by a caterpillar caterpillar or something Yeah, she looks like she's straight out of fucking Alice in Wonderland Who is doja cat?

She's a rapper. No, she's not. Yep. Not like this Yeah, yeah She looks like you've definitely heard doja cat songs on the radio. Give me one Oh How the fuck am I supposed to know what that was? Um Bro, she looks like there was a power ranger villain that was just eyeballs That's what she fucking looks like right now. I'm trying to find a Doja cat song that you would know

This is really really dumb like none of these are even remotely cool Oh, you you want to say so remember that song? Nope, bro. Come on. You fuck How am I supposed to know this bro doja? You never listen to the radio in your car for 15 hours a day Bro, you think I listen to the radio like a fucking 90 year old man I listen to my own music I've never heard this song. I listen to Led Zeppelin like a child You never heard that it sounds like Cardi B

Nice, uh, but anyway, did I do something? Are the Cardi fans coming at me? What are they called the Cardi card the card dealers? I don't know dude, uh, the I don't know Um, all right, and then lastly here we have back to the Met Gala This is a woman by the name of kim petrus. I don't I'm not very familiar with her She really went the horse her out. Yes This reminds me of like On pit my ride when In the first episode like in the beginning of the episode the guy's like, well, you know

I kind of like horses and then exhibits like Bet and then puts a horse face on it. Yeah, you like horses so much. We put the smell of horse shit in your trunk Yeah, there's 10 TVs. Yeah. I'm not sure I'd be like I like video games. It's like we put eight fucking x boxes in your trunk. Yeah It's like what the fuck are you talking about? I like make I saw one I remember like swimming It's like we put a pool back. That's what I was like I really like juices and it's like, yo, we put a whole juice bar in your back seat fresh produce all the time Yeah, and we're like what it's like. Hey man, chill out. I don't need that. I just need a car. Yeah, exactly this so they she like She heard

First of all, who the fuck is this? She's the singer. I believe so what does she sing? That I don't know. I'm not very familiar with her Is she like I think she does vocals on like EDM tracks. Oh, so she's not a singer. No, she's a singer It's not you're I'm sorry. I hate to be the bearer of bad news. You're not a singer if all you do is You definitely are dude German singer In songwriter. Oh, she's german. I gotta be careful what I say What does that mean? Someone just called her the bag yet bitch bag yet bitch. Yeah

um Yeah, I don't know I'm not familiar with these associated acts charlie xcx lil erin jesse st. John and sophie. I know one of those people Who charlie xcx. Oh, yeah, I've heard that name before too. That's the one that was like, um, You know, uh, what was it? I thought that was iconopop iconopop iconopop. That's probably it. Yeah, that's definitely it. All right. Lastly here. We have pete davidson Oh My grandma has that jacket had she's dead

Oh, when you're right, you're right, dude when you're right, you're fucking right Honestly, this is not the worst. He is dressed exactly like hillary clinton. He's got pearls Which is cool. That's not pearls. Those are diamonds diamonds daddy Yeah, his legs are very sit from toy story I don't know like this is not like if someone was like, yo, you can wear whatever you want He didn't pick this bro. This is how literally how my grandma used to dress at funerals not her own We had a different kind of we had like a blue a blue Suje dress on her but like this is how she would go to her funeral

For sure for sure for sure. We didn't put her in something this cool No, no, no, no, no He also said that he uh, someone asked him like what the inspiration was and he said, uh, a slutty nun Which was But yeah, I don't I don't like the boots. I'm not a big fan of those like big ass tall ass like boots Yeah, I can't pull off those boots, but you don't really have a say you don't have a say It's like you go the designers like, yo, we're gonna put you in this. No, that's not true. That's not true. That's not true

I heard um Well, I think if you heard billy eilish was like y'all only wear this if like you never use fur ever again And they were like, all right deal They're not gonna follow that they were like, oh, yeah, sure. Go wear this. Oh, she she made like a she did like she made like a blood packed Another person i've never heard a song from billy eilish. You've definitely heard. I'm definitely not Jesus I she's a great singer. I'm sure she is It's her and her brother. Um, and he's very talented. Phineas. He's the producer, right? Yeah, and he's a songwriter as well Yeah, no, this I this would be the like the other one that I would wear

By the way, billy eilish booby That one. Oh Jesus I was like, where's he going with this? No, but uh, yeah, so pete davison. I'd wear this I'd wear a dress. Yeah, I'd wear a dress. I mean like this looks kind of dope Like honestly like this like we're gonna be wearing this in a couple years So people will be like, oh my god pete davison was ahead of the curve um

Yeah, I don't know how if I could like pull off a dress. Yeah, I think the one I would wear the least was the chair The chair would be tough to pull off, but that was a nice dress. She had had horses on it. Yes Oh, no the the butthole one. There's the one that one. I yeah that one. I can't that one the horse dress actually I'm not wearing a horse's face. I would wear a horse's face before I wore that fucking my face That looks like what it looked like when I probably came out of my mother Just not smiling face first just Oh my god, he's crowning Can you imagine just my face like I'm coming

Oh my god, what a maniac Um, but yeah, man, that's that's the that all sucked. I can't wait till we go until we go next year Yeah, if you do go I tweeted I was like, I'm going to shit on the Met Gala every single year until I go until I'm invited And then I'm just gonna be fire. I will if you get invited just promise to bring me and I will wear Whatever you want me to wear dude. Are you kidding me? If I get like a fringe invite I'm going to go fucking ape shit there like I'm gonna be like, yo I don't even know. I just just blood just cover me in blood Just cover me in blood and and like paint

I'll be or like I'll be dressed as a penguin. I'll be full naked with just something all over my cock and balls Something like like I don't know what it is. You could pick it could be a fucking peanut butter. Yeah It could be a jiffy jar. It's a message about the peanut big peanut is controlling your mind Oh, you're cocks It's controlling your penises. Yeah, or like just like wear like 30 condoms Oh, man, yeah, no can't wait to go. It's gonna be a fun time It's gonna be a fun time But until then fuck the Met Gala right and until then we're gonna make fun of it 100%

But you know, this is what it is. Frank, where can they find you? F alvers 8 0 8 5 on twitter the frank alvarez on twitch and instagram Go check out the patreon patreon.com slash the basement yard You sign up you get the weekly episodes a week in advance get in on the jokes and the conversation early And you get to that next year you get exclusive content and that is exclusive episodes every single friday at 7am You start the week off great and the week off great. Go do it at patreon.com slash the basement yard Yes, and you guys can follow me at joe sanagato and go follow the show at the basement yard on tiktok and instagram And that is all we'll see you guys next time later

That's all I got