The Basement Yard - #347 - Australia's The Scariest Place On Earth

Episode Date: May 23, 2022

Joe and Frank go through some reasons why Australia is so horrifying. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome back to the basement yard Welcome back to the basement. Yes, we're back. We are back live Loaded and large. Yeah live large and in public. Which one of us are loaded, you know, probably me That's a nice way to say overweight now now he's loaded he's loaded now you've seen Frankie He's got a loaded in a loaded. I'd rather be called loaded than out of shape Yeah, or like just like people start like doing that I one time on a I think on like an Instagram post or something I wrote remember how Josh used to say like live large like live loud and in person or something like that
Starting point is 00:00:38 Or some one of our friends used to say that Josh. It might have been you. Yeah, I put that and and I Like someone read it as like live loud and in person instead of like You're like that was fucking beautiful someone was like, yo, that's honestly really cool That's good advice, dude. I I didn't want to tell them that it was meant to be like a frat star like, you know Like oh live like live loud you know, um, but Yeah, and I actually we just like I asked you the question So for those of you guys that don't know which is all of you guys. Yeah, uh before we start recording
Starting point is 00:01:11 We we you know, obviously we go through what we're going to talk about But every now and then we'll just come across a question. We'll ask it Most of the time me and Joey goes save that He's like I'm like what he's like pull him with that. Yeah. Uh, and so I was asking you is Do you how often? Well, let's start here. Do you sit when you pee? Now when you say that like only pee not like schist and then there's a little obviously I'm not standing and shitting frank I don't think I'm saying like like yeah, I'm sure when you sit when you think there are people who shit
Starting point is 00:01:45 Standing duh dude. Have you done that? No, but I'm saying like I mean like crouching like if they're like It can't make it to a bathroom. No, no, I'm talking about straight up knees locked Shitting. I don't think that's possible dude. There's no hundred percent. I could shit right now standing up. Yeah It'll make a fucking big old-time mess not if I straddle the toilet With the seat up. I don't think it matters what's under you. It's just it's about your ass. Oh my ass is toast Dude, you're it would get messy. Yeah for sure It would it would be like a fucking like play-doh like, you know, like you push the play-doh out the back and it like Kind of like curls out
Starting point is 00:02:18 Of like a little like crevice. I have kids. They have play-doh toys. Yeah, also It's probably 7 a.m. For some people right now and uh, enjoy your coffee. Enjoy your coffee Yeah, uh, well that coffee is probably gonna make you so why don't you tell us have that coffee go to the bathroom Yeah, lock stand up lock your knees and fucking push. No, dude. There's no way you people do I mean, I'm sure people have done it because they have no choice, but like it makes a mess Yeah, no, that'd be messy. But do you sit when you pee? I I don't I don't I don't I don't like usually I have But like
Starting point is 00:02:51 It's not your preferred method of piss It Well, what kind of is it hot or cold out? Does that make a fucking difference big time? First of all, when you go to the outhouse, joe you live in an apartment. It's temper control temper Temperature control it's not though because in the winter the seat's cold I don't know about that there bab bro Your seat your toilet seat doesn't get cold in the winter
Starting point is 00:03:17 No, because I live in a home that is insulated and has fucking heat joey people's toilet seats get cold That's a thing you you toilet seat ever gets cold. Nope. Wow rich boy. Yeah. Oh, yeah You got a hot seat in there my five dollar plastic toilet seat that I got I do you're the one that has the expensive toilets it joey's toilet by the way It looks like just like a brick. There's no like bottom. It's just like a it's it's the weirdest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. It's a normal toilet. No, it's not a normal toilet Normal toilet has the bowl and they're like curves underneath and then there's like a base. I have a bowl. No Well, yes, it's a regular toilet. No, it's not a regular toilet, dude. It's some fucking futuristic blade runner 2049 toilet
Starting point is 00:03:57 It's not a fucking it's not a futuristic toilet It is a futuristic toilet because and I'll toilet toilet toilet. That's a funny word I'll tell you how I know this You know like toilets now have buttons where it's like less water more water like piss and boo yours just has two silver buttons Yeah, it doesn't tell you what it doesn't tell you what is what but the small one you can assume is smaller water I didn't inspect either of them enough to be able to tell if there's one that's smaller than the other Sometimes if I take a really fat piss, I'll hit the shit button Why I don't know. I just feel like you'll flush that piss. Do you flush in the middle of the night?
Starting point is 00:04:33 Hell yeah, what do you mean? What do you think? I'm just gonna leave piss. Yeah That's what I do Yeah, that's what I do. No the night you go to the bathroom. Yeah, you sitting down or you standing up. I'm standing up So you stand in the dark too, by the way and you piss into this bowl. Yeah, it's it's actually it's a it's a it's a Fucking russian roulette the way I pee in the middle of the night. Well, we'll get to that Okay, but you pee into the bowl. Yeah, and then you look at it and you go And you go to bed. Oh, yeah, dude. I'm I'm already a why don't you flush it because I'm awake I want to be back asleep. That's gonna add more time to me being awake might make it harder to go back to sleep this
Starting point is 00:05:11 Is that what you're referring to? That's exactly what I'm referring to every millisecond that I'm awake when I'm supposed to be asleep is I'm is Lost time. So I just I just leave it and then I flush it in the morning What do you think what if you shit first of all don't do that in the middle of the night You've never shit in the middle and I have but I always flush, you know, but okay. Would you flush the shit is my point? Yeah, duh You're not flushing piss. Do you think that's crazy for me to ask? Bro, but piss piss piss and shit are very different monsters Okay, right both monsters. No one is a fucking demon
Starting point is 00:05:45 Demogorgon and the other is just like a little like evil evil bad guy piss is like I wouldn't even what would you rather what would you rather have piss is like bread What would you leave it out with the air and it gets stale and much worse? So if you leave piss in bro, it's in water. It's it's like that Masks it if I was pissing in the middle of my fucking room. No, bro. That's just like a no It would be like a by the way happening Key West One of the people that were there. I woke up. Yeah to them pissing on the side of the room And I was like, what do you do it and they're like I'm done
Starting point is 00:06:18 It's like I'm done. Don't worry. I'm done. What would you rather have me pissing in this room or shitting in this room? Dude, exactly piss. It's not that bad. It's just a fucking smelly liquid, but you could just flush it Yeah, but you don't have to like if you don't it's not the end of the world Dude, you don't live in a trailer. You have plumbing. I know hence why I don't have cold fucking toilet seats joey Frankie everyone has cold toilet. I don't know about that. I don't I honestly don't think so I I I can't remember your house doesn't get cold ever Does my house get cold? relatively speaking but like not to the point where I'm like
Starting point is 00:06:56 And I sit on a toilet seat and it fucking makes me jump. Well, I got a sensitive You probably do have a sensitive asshole. Mine is still raw as shit Because of the patreon video patreon.com slash basement. You're getting waxed. Yeah, yeah, yeah But no, no, no, I but so you're like how often do you would you say you sit when you pee because I'm probably like a I probably sit a percentage. I sit a third of the time. I would say whoa 33 Yeah, 33.33 bar 33% of your pisses are done sitting I would say at least and you're talking about the whole time. It was a piss
Starting point is 00:07:32 Yeah, you're like you're sitting on the couch and you go piss. Yeah, just piss. Yeah, and then you go And you sit down there. Yeah You just whiz. Yeah, I do whiz. I whiz hard. Yeah, and this is the thing I'm confident saying that now 10 years ago sitting when you pee apparently it was gay Yeah, big gay, it was apparently a big gay thing Apparently I remember it was like an insult like uh, joe sits when he pees because girls sit when they pee Well, why girls are gay girls are gay No, but yeah, but um, I don't
Starting point is 00:08:08 Do it. I I'll tell you what I would say the amount of pisses I would say out of 100 pisses Maybe three of them. I sit That's 3% of the time and all Yeah, I'm a fucking idiot Uh, and the only reason why that happens is because in the middle of the night Wait, you're in the middle of the night sitter Yeah, I have to that's the only time that makes have to you're already you were coherent enough to get up and walk to the bathroom Yeah, but I am blind. I take my contacts out. I can't see that's right and it's dark
Starting point is 00:08:40 I have no chance of hitting the water. That's right. That's right. That's that's I'll piss all over the goddamn damage control sitting down at that point in time That's smart. Yeah, that's very smart, but I also take risks one time. I pissed on my toilet when it was closed I was like, am I peeing on a drum? But it was my fucking toilet. Why did you go to a drone because it sounded like Like it sounded like you were pissing on like a like a like one of those drums like a bongo drum. Yeah, like a bongo Really? Yeah, that's what it sounded like. What a fucking awesome toilet you have. Yeah I would say yeah, my my middle of the night peas are tough Because we have like a little night light in our bathroom And I don't turn it on because you turn that fucking light on that's fucking bong
Starting point is 00:09:17 A night light and they're supposed to be like pretty dim It's it's it's strong enough that like you can like see the bathroom But like I pee and I just hope like I'm getting into the toilet I hear I listen for the the porcelain And then I listen for the water. Yeah, and then I'm like, all right, I'm good If there's any mess, I'll figure it out in the morning. Have you ever completely missed? Yeah Yeah, I have
Starting point is 00:09:42 I just clean it up but like What do you say? Oh shit I said, oh And then but then you have to steer. Yeah, then you well, then I stop I pinch it. I bite it. You know, I I cut it off as bite it You bite your dick close bite my dick. I cut it off at the edge, you know, I see I seal it You circumcise it. I circumcise it. Got it. Quarterize it. Yeah at the opening
Starting point is 00:10:08 Right, and then just figure out where I gotta go Maybe even like crouch a little bit and then figure it out Dude, I can't really stop mid piss like I could but really for like I've gotten good at 0.7 seconds Oh, I've gotten good at it from I've peed in the car so many times and I know how to stop and start I'm I never like it's a gift. It's a skill. I actually that's funny you say that Texted my wife this morning There's no no one pees in the car quite like me Yeah out of red light
Starting point is 00:10:38 Red light. Oh, yeah Car next to you piss and probably getting way way incriminating myself here. Well, I mean you could piss Pissing is not I think it's a decent exposure if wait if you have your own dick out In your car I love to say your own like you've had someone else's dick. Yeah, like I have tinted windows by the way I just want to make sure I make that very clear And they're strong tense. Yeah, and this red light was not in your school
Starting point is 00:11:04 No, it wasn't No, but if you Have your dick out and you're not like jerking off or anything, but you're just kind of you're just naked pants down I mean, yeah Is that illegal? I assume it's if you're not trying to like show it to anyone I assume it's a form of a decent exposure. I I don't think you're allowed to just be naked in public Where people can see it's not about if they do it's about if they can
Starting point is 00:11:28 Like for instance like right outside your window right here If I walked up to that window dick involves, you know screaming in the wind I'm in trouble because people could see in the in the building. It's your space No way That's not that's not true. Bro. I'm pretty sure Dude think about all the fucking like Why do people then get in trouble for that shit like fucking jerking off and out of their windows looking at people You're jerking off. All right, someone you can't jerk off at a person
Starting point is 00:11:57 You jerk off at someone you have to jerk off at your like phone or a screen I assume you could jerk off at someone you just you direct it toward them. No, like I'm saying bro I'm saying like if if we live in high rises that are right next to each other. Yeah, you could walk around naked all you want Really? Of course, I didn't know that you can call and be like, yo, I could see you're naked and be like cool Whatever. I don't care. Good good on you. This is my crib. It is my crib Yeah, but if you're like if I'm staring into your apartment and jerking off all your your cook because you're cooking dinner or something That is the law
Starting point is 00:12:30 Can't do that. Are you sure about that? Yeah, you can't jerk off at a person be like, oh Potatoes tonight. But like what's the difference of me walking around my apartment naked and you can see in and me sitting on my couch And fucking cranking it out to the oldies I guess you could jerk off in your own house to You just can't jerk off at the window staring into my so as long as there's no like direction. There's no, uh, what's what's the word? I'm looking for uh, uh, not preamble um premeditation
Starting point is 00:13:00 Not preamble as long as there's no premeditation to the the crank. You're cool Yeah, I don't know. I think I think car is no good though Yeah, I also don't think that I think like sex in a car. You can get in trouble for that, right big time Yeah, which is weird. Isn't that look it up is sex in a car or crime? I gotta assume it's like a form of indecent exposure is sex in A car a crime There's no law to there's no law that explicitly states that having sex in a car is illegal
Starting point is 00:13:33 There are still ways in which a person might receive criminal charges. For example, these are A public lewdness. Oh, I hate that word lewd. Yeah, it's stupid. Does that mean that your nipples are not out? But everything else is out. Yeah dump that nipple Nip it up A public indecency. Yeah, that's the one. I think that's the one I think where it's just like you're not actively trying to do something to harm someone but like you're being bad Yeah, if you have sexual intercourse expose any intimate body part except for the genitals
Starting point is 00:14:07 In a lewd manner with the unlikely intent to arouse or satisfy another another sexual desire. That's what I was saying like if you are If there's intent to arouse or satisfy another preamble now we're talking about that's the that's what I meant by jerking at me Yeah, that's the preamble when you're directing the crank at someone. Why don't I keep saying crank like I'm in seventh grade again Yeah, crank is a crazy one. I'm thinking of like gear shifts. So in theory if we were At a concert and like we put like blankets around us and did sex With no one noticing is that bad? Yeah, bro, you're outdoors
Starting point is 00:14:48 But like it says like no exposure of like private parts. So like I can't see your pussy. You can't see my dick You're the woman You're the woman. You just gave me that pussy. Yeah, you're welcome. They're you think I would have fire pussy honestly No, no, you'd be why you think I would have whack pussy. Yeah, you'd be whack and you would not know what to do with it You'd throw it back like a fucking Betty spaghetti. You don't think I would have like a good arch No, let me see your let me see your arch. Just give me one Oh, bro, your flight is aboard right now, dude. Fuck dude. Arse that back, bitch
Starting point is 00:15:24 I'm getting fucking self-conscious. Can you like off camera? Can you show me like you're on all fours arch ass up? I don't think there's a reason Well, we're rating it. We're being honest right now. Yeah, I know but like Chill out, dude. You're making me fucking self-conscious about getting fucked in my pussy. You said I would have whack pussy. That's wild, dude Yeah, well, I mean, you know call it how I see it, you know, I no disrespect to you I can ask you a question. Yeah Have ever in your life have why are you asking that? Have you I don't know. Have you ever in life Had sex with a woman and you were like
Starting point is 00:15:58 This vagina is not a cool vagina Uh, not by the look Not by the look but by like the feel the rest of the package the feel of it I don't think so. I mean either. I don't think I've never been like I've never been whack pussy That's like I've never been like a movie critic where I'm like I've seen a lot of you know I'm going in here and I need to analyze this You know like visually it was great and you know like it made like there were emotional beats
Starting point is 00:16:26 But the storytelling the plot holes. Yeah, I don't I don't think I critiqued Vaginas enough to be able to provide like a super in-depth like detailed breakdown like that Like you know when dudes say that was like, oh you you're pussy's whack. I feel like What is that literally never like that was you're like having sex with a girl and the vagina just like feels like Like a like it hurts like it's it's a thing like it's it's just part like I mean it's it's there But like it's not that that makes it the memorable part. It's everything else. You know, it's the the person behind It's the person commanding the ship, you know, what are they called the captain captain. That's it It's the captain
Starting point is 00:17:08 It's a captain behind the ship right like Titanic is both just a regular as both what made it well What made a memorable was sinking but like yeah, what made it cool was the captain Because like the captain's like I control this ship now. Okay. I'm staring you're saying that making sense It loosely you're like for instance, you never you'll never remember any plane you fly on but you'll remember the pilot I remember no pilots I want you to know something. I don't know any pilots I only remember I remember a bus driver once. Okay. Do you remember the bus? Not a goddamn the q69. Okay. You might you might have remembered the physical line. Yeah
Starting point is 00:17:50 Oh, remember the bus what that's what I'm saying like the vagina or the butthole Let's let's let's be you know all inclusive here for boys. Yeah, those that's just that's the the vessel You remember the director you remember the movie and the director You know what I'm saying? If it's a great movie. You're like, oh my god That movie was great and it was directed by this awesome director. Yeah, Spielberg. Yeah Spielberg is Spielberg because of his pussy that's gonna Do you think a vagina
Starting point is 00:18:20 or a bussy Have which one has more potential to be trash bussy Yeah, high-risk hybrid ward I hear. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you know you're you're either you're you're you're making a left at main street And you you're milking it or you're going down the wrong alleyway and deal with boom. You've lost your watch Oh, you're talking about poop. You're doing a lot of metaphors and they're not really making a bunch of sense but Boom, you've lost your watch. You know what I'm talking about. Yeah, you're robbed
Starting point is 00:18:51 Yes, meta physically and you're talking about poop Yeah, that's that would that would be a bit of a robbery. Don't you think joe? Yeah, I think so some people are into poop though Not me me neither. I'm not into that. Uh, you did recently. Uh, no, can't talk about that. Yeah, uh-huh Sorry, I didn't mean to with the upcoming season of opa is gonna be wild. Okay. It's gonna be crazy. Yeah, um Yeah, I would say you're more likely to get a trash because like A trash bus. Yeah a bussy by the way Boy pussy boy pussy, which is asshole asshole uh
Starting point is 00:19:30 I would say like there's more There's more at risk with a bussy You know Yeah, vaginas are it's like the garage like everyone likes to keep it stopped With the metaphors Enough with the metaphors. It's like a garage Hear me out You know like you keep like hear me out. Hear me out. Hear me out. All right. You ready?
Starting point is 00:20:09 Hear me out. Hear me out. Yeah, I'll hear you. Okay. The body is the house. Okay The vagina is the basement The asshole is the garage If you have a nice house, you got a halfway decent basement, you know But there are many people with nice houses that just treat their garage like shit You know what I'm saying? You know exactly they're always like, oh, I'll get I'll get to it. I'll get to it Yeah, and then one day they got a couple cars that want to park their way into the garage
Starting point is 00:20:40 They got an awful garage. Yeah I'm assuming there's gonna be a valiant attempt at some point too eventually. Yeah, what are we talking about again? We're talking about well, we started with sitting when we were paying but then you said what's what's Like more likely to be trashed a bussy or opposing right and I guess we settled that anyway, let's get to these ads Wait, do you agree? Oh Jesus? Wait, what? We're talking about pussy versus bussy. Yeah, go ahead for the ads. Okay. Um Okay, uh the first one we have here
Starting point is 00:21:15 I lost my voice yesterday at the ranger game. They won by the time this comes out. They'll probably be eliminated though Uh, I win them all folks. The first one we have here is better help. Uh, better help is online counseling So if you want to talk to an online counselor a therapist, you want to do some therapy You can do that through better help. Uh, we will help you save some money too I believe it's 10 off of your first month if you use the code baseman yard Go to betterhelp.com slash base me yard to get 10 off of your first month Like I said, you can talk to a licensed therapist You could text phone call video chat whatever you want and set your own schedule
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Starting point is 00:23:04 Novo platform incorporated is a fintech not a bank Banking services provided by middle sex federal savings f a members fdic terms and conditions apply All right, so frank we have some stuff here Boy, do we and before we get to that stuff we should remind people that we have a patreon account Just in case you didn't know if you didn't know what are you doing realistically? Welcome to the show. How's that rock? You've been living under patreon.com slash the basement yard Our big claim to fame right now by the way inch and very close to 11 000 joey. I don't know if you saw it
Starting point is 00:23:38 Yeah, we're real close But um, we like to set goals and do things every time we hit a milestone We're currently discussing what our next milestones will be but guess what since we had gotten a 10 000 your boy So boy a blue lounge over here had to get his uh, uh Well a brazilian wax but for a man a bro zillion a man zillion So there's a 25 minute video to thank you guys
Starting point is 00:24:02 for all of your Kindness and courtesy that's on the patreon patreon.com slash the basement yard sign up today that first here You get these weekly episodes a week in advance. Everyone starts talking about them tagging us. You see the clips everything Before everybody else a whole week before everybody else and then that second tier. Well, that's where you get the goodies, baby Those exclusive episodes every single friday morning You start your week at the basement yard and your week with the basement yard Let me tell you as of recording the last patreon episode that we did boy. Oh boy
Starting point is 00:24:31 Yeah, yeah quite a bit. I don't know that I actually just talked to Because he's like post clips. He's like He's like, are we just gonna play the game of like how quickly we get taken out? Yeah, because They're we play with a bunch of sex toys. Um, we don't play with them. Well, you play with them. I can see one of them from here Yeah, two actually two of them. Yeah. Um, we don't play with them as much as we just discuss them Well, you played with one of them after everything wrapped up. Don't even start. I know exactly what you played with don't even start By the way, where is it?
Starting point is 00:25:04 Don't even start. I don't even know which one you're referring to but go check it out patreon.com slash the basement yard Every single episode that's been on there previously you guys can sign up today and get access to so You got something coming up some traveling or something that you want to listen to some episodes. Guess what? They're all up there patreon.com slash the basement yard all right Frank now today we're going to talk about something scary. Oh, is it halloween? Is it fucking october? Are you fucking horno? I'm ready for halloween. But what do you mean halloween this year? Dude, were you kidding me? You never be anything for halloween. I hate halloween. Wow. You're a stupid little bitch. I'm a grinch
Starting point is 00:25:40 Stupid little bitch. I'm a grinch when it comes to that. I just don't like it. There's there's no definitely another word for it bitch pedophile Because I don't like halloween because you don't go out. You have to keep your door locked. You don't give out candy just like them I feel like they'd be doing the opposite. Nope. They're I think they're like court ordered to not do that stuff. Oh, well, yeah, if you get caught I thought you were talking about the ones that are out there Like unknown pedoph... Yeah, the ones that are filing. Oh, Jesus Christ, joey. How do you how do you even do this with a straight face, man? Fucking couldn't keep going Jesus Look are you kidding me motherfucker? Okay. Um, no there was a story in the news
Starting point is 00:26:21 One of my biggest fears as a kid was this and it's kind of I have no reason to be scared. Women Yeah, uh No, but uh the post the post uh posted the thing a teen was hospitalized after receiving a snake bite to his penis While on the toilet. What? So a snake Climbed up that fucking pipe Bit this fucking teen on his wane And he's Thai
Starting point is 00:26:52 He's from Thailand. I swear to God. I was recently thinking of like That couldn't have can happen to me And it just terrified me. I didn't I saw a video really long ago of oh It might have been like in australia or something. They got crazy shit over it. Did it bite it off? Or what the fuck is good with australia, bro? They got to figure it the fuck out Like bro, how do you all have all of these animals there? Not even the animals, but like and why are they all? Supersized bro, not even other but they're not even just supersized. They're just fucking deadly Dude, the box jellyfish is like this big and it stings you you're gone in like a minute and a half
Starting point is 00:27:31 Everything down there wants to kill you. What is with the animals? The terrain also like yo kangaroos. How's that even a real thing, bro? Yeah, dude I think there's some weird like evolutionary Like advancement going on in australia, bro, and I saw a picture one time of a car driving down the street And there was a spider I'm not kidding this thing looked like a traffic light. It was huge and it was spinning a whip and i'm like Literally, I could get caught in that. You ever see a coconut crab What is that they have those in australia? I think look it up. Just google coconut crab
Starting point is 00:28:08 Coco nut crab What the fuck is this thing? That thing's a big boy. Is this like at the beaches? There they I mean I would assume they people find them on like they're like garbage cans and show I imagine you're going out to just like bring your garbage can to the fucking curb and all of a sudden There's this thing that can take your whole dude Dude, they're big. This is the size of a garbage can dude. They're big, dude Which picture did you pull up? Is it the one i'm thinking about? Yeah, dude That's a problem. Get the fuck out of here with this shit, bro. Why yeah, what's going on with Australia?
Starting point is 00:28:40 It's a bird eating crab It eats birds. It's a crab. How does it get in the sky? Well, joey, I think that how does it sneak up on a bird you ever try to sneak up on a bird? No, try to grab a bird. You can't they fly away, right? I can't they're pretty tough to grab How is this fucking crab? Maybe their backs look like worms so the bird lands on them and then they snatch them up I hate this bro. I fucking Dude, I I'm I'm not playing this up Look at this
Starting point is 00:29:14 What the fuck are we doing? You're that's big dude. Yo, listen. Is that a Dengar? Is that a Dengar? Look at this fucking thing next to dogs carefully make sure you close all your fucking tabs up there, joe Why I saw one that says petite little teen squirted in eyes Let's not say that it says teen hospitalized though. Oh, okay Yeah, imagine walking down the street a kangaroo tries to kick your fucking dick off And then you turn around and you're getting chased by that if I saw this in real life
Starting point is 00:29:46 I would think I was on like a movie set like I wouldn't even you I wouldn't even it wouldn't even register that it was an actual thing Because what the fuck is that everything down there is like either the toughest thing in the world or trying to kill you And they're the toughest thing in the world because everything's trying to kill them That sounds like australian bro They're like chilling like playing rugby and just like bashing their skulls against each other for fun Yeah, they're and then they're drinking out of shoes and yeah, they're fucking wild dude Their toilets go backwards Fuck with australia though
Starting point is 00:30:11 You basically need to be able to be like on a plane for 25 hours to get there misery. I do fuck with australia, but Even when fuckers got bugs You got bugs dude. There's like yo look up like dangerous bugs like worse australian australian Uh wild australian bugs animals Craziest australian animals. They have a lot of shit. I'm gonna say bugs I wrote bogus Uh-oh, what do you find? What is it?
Starting point is 00:30:49 Ew dude, it looks like a fucking stick. Okay. I can't even look at this. Yeah, you know, let me say let me say let me say It's just a bunch of bugs though. This is the thing i'm talking about What is that a stick? It looks like a stick bug a stick bug. I've seen one of those I don't fuck with bugs. Look at that bed You're you're not a big bug boy. Yo, i'm terrified of bugs. I just realized this like not too long ago Really? I don't like things to have little like faces and shit. Yeah bugs Like when they have like little stuff like this and it moves quickly. I don't like anything like that I really don't like that like something crawling on me right now. I can freak myself out thinking about it
Starting point is 00:31:21 I think we I think we know what we can do for a patreon goal. No, bro. I'm gonna get you in a tank with cockroaches, bro literally Everyone can suck my balls I'm not doing that. I think I love it, baby. I legit have like a forreal phobia. Like I'm scared. I don't know Why is it because you saw the mummy one too many times and you saw the scarab dig under the guy's skin? This is the only reason why and this is like the real reason and it's this is not me trying to be funny But it's the only way I can explain it. It's just icky Like that's literally the only thing that comes to mind is like ill
Starting point is 00:31:52 Like I do this why because little like faces. So dude, it's part of nature. You know, they're like gross Do you know that like we are like vastly outnumbered as a species by bugs? I'm less afraid Of that big fucking crap unless that thing is fast. I don't like shit. That's fast either What about the stuff that can like burrow into your skin like bot flies bro? Hell no, I saw a video of an earwig the other day. Do they go into your ears? I really don't know. I don't know. Yeah, dude, they live in that shit. They live in ears, dude Or they get stuck in that mother I've seen ones of like moths
Starting point is 00:32:28 Oh, I I knew someone who was camping and a moth flew into their ear And they were like going crazy They had to get it like like a doctor to remove the moth from their ear because it was like burrowing its way into its head Bro, I would literally I'm not kidding Kill yourself I mean, what do you else are you supposed to cover the ear and like petroleum jelly and like it has to force its way out Petroleum jelly. Yeah, where am I getting that Vaseline, dude? Why do you have Vaseline on a camping trip? I'm saying don't get some anal sex freak. You're an anal freak. I'm not an anal freak, Joe
Starting point is 00:33:09 You're an anal freak. Let's get to these ads Um, no, I'm saying like just like cover it bro That's what I saw with like people like a bot fly like it looked like a big fucking bot fly Bro look up bot fly and skin bot bot bot fly Someone put like it looked like a blackhead and they put oh my god Yeah, they put like a thing of like Vaseline over it and it digs its way out and they have to they have to like extract the larva You've never seen the stuff like this
Starting point is 00:33:38 No, dude. I didn't know this existed. You just ruined me The next time I get a pimple. I'm gonna be like get to it's a bot fly. Yeah Or you ever seen like what happens when people get like spider bites Their hands like turn to dust and shit like that What bro look up spider bites Spider bite. I don't dust hand. No, just put spider bites I don't want to I don't want to see the results because I've seen this one too many times spider bites I'm seeing just big big like red marks big red mark
Starting point is 00:34:10 There it is Yo, my hand just made a pin a pinchy. Are you okay? Yo, I'm so scared. Oh, well this bitch got bit on the lip and that shit is huge, bro Don't I don't want to see it. It's just like so big. All right This dude's hands deteriorating That's what happens babe spiders And they're like spiders you can find in the northeast like a brown recluse. How are we able to almost
Starting point is 00:34:41 Have like elephants go extinct or like certain types of birds go extinct, but we can't kill off A a fucking crab the size of a giant because they all have their purpose in nature, joe They everyone has their own role. What is this crab doing that we need? I don't know. Maybe crabs are killing barracudas I like barracudas. Do you wait barracudas are in the water. Are they are they? Yeah, dude, they're fish. How would a crab kill? Oh, this thing is killing fucking birds You think it can't go under water and kill a fucking fish. I didn't know that it was a fucking wait It can go into sea. No, I can't be swimming and see this shit Bro, you didn't know this look at some of bro. You ever seen what like a king crab looks like like an infestation a king crab
Starting point is 00:35:20 I have but those are good. They taste good. They taste delicious. Those aren't going anywhere No, I hope not and if they do I hope they become a lot cheaper pretty pretty expensive right now like 70 a pound And you were up to date on the mp quite Dude I don't fuck with any of this But like what would be worse you sitting on the toilet and getting your penis bit by a spider Or you sit on the toilet and getting your penis bit by a snake. I would snake. I would say snake Well spiders i'm not that afraid of unless I see a video of them very up close because then I could see this
Starting point is 00:35:52 Shit and I see it the older eyes. So you're so you're fine with spiders if you never like a picture of their face Or we'll like see them with all their eyes a lot of time wet mouths a lot of time. Yeah, that shit is disgusting Yeah, when an animal has a wet mouth not even like an animal just insects when they have wet faces I'm so it it enrages me. Yeah, like it it fucking It's just driving nuts. Yeah, like I do you want to kill him? Yeah, like why like bad like light it on fire Wow, I'm dead serious So like like a close-up of like say, uh Like a fly with like that snout. That's just always do you hate it fucking hate that I fucking hate that
Starting point is 00:36:34 I hate it so hard. I never knew this about you Yo, and I like I feel like I just don't I mean we live in New York We don't we get like mosquitoes and like I mean you get a roach and shit in your house sometimes or like a mouse But I don't fuck with mice either. Don't fuck with mice either. Well the reason why I don't fuck with bitches, bro No, no, I don't fuck with mice because they're fast and I don't fuck with fast shit Okay, hold on anything that like so things that you don't fuck with fast things the faces of bugs Little wet faces of bugs wet little faces and like Pincers with like a bunch of like a bunch of mouths. Yeah, and like quick legs like quick moving legs when they're upside down
Starting point is 00:37:09 Oh, what about and then you don't fuck with fast shit. No, I have nothing fast So like a slow mouse you're fine with One that could dart across the room in If a mouse was slow I would be negative afraid of it But negative that it could be there one minute and gone the next I just don't like how they fuck with me I sound like I'm crying But I don't like how like I'm just chilling
Starting point is 00:37:33 And then all of a sudden just be like And I'm like no Because then I got to worry about this shit running around And bro if you and yo don't put those fucking little because they have little quick feet too They're cute. They're like cuddly and shit, but they have little quick pink feet and I don't fuck with them What about like ever touched me with those? What about like a guanas that go on two legs and run? They're fast dude. Um, no, they're too big Bro, I when we were kids we had little iguanas like this one is bro. These are wild lizards
Starting point is 00:38:01 iguanas, dude iguanas can be like this big I don't like fat if if an a if a if some salamander Wet-faced salamander that runs across the room. Salamanders are fine. Why they're not that fast. Are they for salamanders? They're mad fast anything that runs at me. I don't like So what if they're flying at you? Bro even worse Actually, that's not worse, but I don't like that. You don't like if I go to kill a bug And it flies and it's not a fly flies. I'm like not afraid of but I don't like looking at them
Starting point is 00:38:32 But okay, if like Oh, it's a cockroach like on the wall or something or it's on the floor you go to get it But then it flies my I have to clear my afternoon like I'm done I am done completely checked out of life at that point. I'm like, I'm done. I never knew this about you I'm so afraid. What about those videos? I I'm sure you've seen at least one or two of them Where like there's like a spider on the wall and people go to kill it and they think it's dead and they've removed the shoe And it jumps at them Is that your is that your like your personal like hell?
Starting point is 00:39:01 I would tell you something right now. Okay two stories. Okay one By the way, we were talking about a kid getting his dick bit by a spider. I mean a snake But now we're diagnosing my phobia. Yeah, I one time and this goes back to fast shit One time I had to take out the garbage at my mom's house And you had to go down the basement stairs and then walk out the back door in the back door was our Small backyard, but it was dark. There was no light back there. Yeah So I opened the door and the light from inside like went outside and it scared something And I had garbage in my hand
Starting point is 00:39:40 And it ran in front of me like across the yard real fast But like right in front of me and I didn't even see what it was It was it could have been just like nothing a an entity a shadow and I fucking Screamed so loud and threw the garbage in the air. You didn't care about it I was screaming so long that I screamed turned around shut the door locked it and I was still screaming Wow, it was a cat I'm not afraid of cats. It's a kitty cat. The shit was moving fast You want to get rid of those things that are moving fast in your house and get a cat. That's what we did as kids
Starting point is 00:40:13 That's why we got mystique. Yeah, get a cat bro. I'm allergic. I'll be dead in a week. That's wrong. Who cares You could fucking figure you could there there are hypo hyalurgenic cats Yeah, are there? Yeah, of course there are I don't know. Um, I wait I have another story Oh, hold on. Well, I was gonna say we had mice as kids and cockroaches as kids And that's why we got mystique the way that you said that that was like as a pet We had we had mice as kids. We had mice as kids. Yeah, that's why we got mystique and mystique got rid of them sons of bitches Quick do Do cats eat mice or they just kill them? They a little bit of a little bit of b
Starting point is 00:40:44 I remember my sister There was like multiple times where my sister would find dead mice in her shoe Because like my cat would take it and then like as like a gift give it to my sister and her in her shoes Be like here you go. Are you happy with me? But it's pretty dope. Just get a cat You hire like a mini furry assassin for your fucking home. Awesome. Yeah The other story I was gonna say too was With a cockroach And I don't know how the fuck this happened, but this really
Starting point is 00:41:12 Hurt me for like it. I would say like for real like three months like for real. Okay I was sitting in the recliner at my mom's house And I was wearing a like a white shirt And a fucking cockroach On your shoulder It just hit my was it like the hissing ones the ones that You didn't know those existed did you I did because of fucking joe rogan and fear factor They would make a today. We're gonna eat all right today. You're laying in a tomb
Starting point is 00:41:46 Yeah filled with hissing cockroaches. It's like come on bro. But this shit landed on me When I was sitting on the recliner, which is not really where I expect to deal with Look, yeah, and you guys had a very well-kept house too. So that speaks poorly on your mom Kidding Liz I'm kidding Yo, this shit landed on me like this And I think it just like fell off at the top of the thing because I think it like climbed and if because we had brown Leather couches. I remember so the shit blended in oh landed on me
Starting point is 00:42:19 I was like what the fuck and I bro when I saw this thing I Yelped I like And just like welling this and got up and I was just doing this for like an hour You shower and I couldn't sit in that recliner for like for real for like three months Like and I would check the recliner all the time too. I'd be like, yo, where's this? Bro, you have a serious phobia I didn't realize this. I'm afraid of I don't care that much like if I have a spot like if there's something that's there that
Starting point is 00:42:45 I didn't know was going to be there or didn't want there. I'd be like, uh, but then I'm done Yeah, no, it doesn't like but you know if the shit touches me I'm fucking pissed off But like if there was a spider on this wall or like a centipede or whatever like I'm not a centipede scary, dude I'm not afraid of centipedes. This is just too slow. They're gross. They they have venom They bite centipedes. I'm pretty sure our carnivores millipedes are not Oh, bro. I don't know. We didn't sit there and count Well, you can tell by the way that they look millipedes are the ones that look just like a strip And then centipedes are the ones where you could see the legs on the sides and they're like evil looking
Starting point is 00:43:18 Yeah, they like they like yeah, they they walk mad slow because like they got fucking a thousand legs or something like that Too many legs. There's a lot of legs, dude But those are the ones that are like cool like you saw timon and poo but eating them like those are cool The scary ones are the ones that have like the horns Oh, okay, you know what I'm talking about. Yeah the horns What was that accent? I don't know why but there's southern. You know what I'm talking about They got the horns and they got the scary legs and then they got like the weird body
Starting point is 00:43:48 Those are the ones that kind of red. Yeah, those are the ones that eat like Like other like rodents and shit like they'll eat like fucking mice and squirrels Fuck dude. Yeah. Yeah, I don't really like bugs though. Like not like that. Damn. I didn't know this dude got bitter Well, I guess what I didn't like getting my fucking bonch torn to shreds But I had to do it for the patreon. Anyway, so you might have to deal with some bugs You'd be surprised at how many things I would do Before I would put my head In a box full of cockroaches. Really? You know why I would never do that
Starting point is 00:44:24 I would do anything else than that a billion dollars Yeah, I'm getting there. Okay, but I'm not gonna like it. Well, yeah, I'm not saying you have to like it I don't I honestly I realistically realistically jokes aside because a billion dollars is not realistic for me yet. Um 15 000 patrons. We're hopefully out. Oh dude. I'm not doing it. Like I really am not seriously I can't I really can't 20 000 patrons. I'm telling you this right now for real I can sit here and you could say here's uh 500 000 dollars in cash, right? And I want to do it I don't think I can why like I you know what's funny is that
Starting point is 00:45:03 Recently there was a Santa gata studios video that went out, uh, which go check out on youtube videos back baby live I think I was wearing this shirt and you might have been yeah, um They put two bugs in front of you to eat a tarantula, which is technically not a bug and a Like a beetle a water scorpion a water scorpion Which bad name you're not going to get anyone to eat anything by calling it a water scorpion call it like you know Like a like a plant like a plant jewel or something like something cool You were really freaked out like and I remember watching the video I was like dude, just take a fucking bite, but you couldn't even like touch it. No
Starting point is 00:45:36 Yeah, I was so scared. It's I don't know I'm yo, and I'm just I'm saying this like like I'm trying to be as fucking serious as possible If you try to prank me with bugs, I will strike you And and I don't want our friendship to change, but it will like I will I will look at me so Look at me if I seriously pranked you with bugs. Yeah, you wouldn't like afterward be like, yeah, that was funny I still love you as a good friend. I would not if not I would greatest friend if you like you wouldn't consider me your greatest friend ever again Bro, I would dead ass hit you if you sat there and you had a cockroach and you threw it at me
Starting point is 00:46:13 That would not go well I would freak the fuck out one If it hit well joe, yeah We got dead. We got him I already just scared me And I knew that was the remote to vibrating panties that was the remote to vibrating panties. Yes, um, but anyway This guy got bit on his fucking. Yeah, you know, that's kind of fucking nuts. That's crazy It was a four foot python bro. What? Oh my god, and it bit the tip of his penis. Oh, no
Starting point is 00:46:46 I don't know why that's where I went Yeah, but that's terrifying dude I would much rather get bit on the side of my I would never be able to use the toilet ever again I I hate it as it is If I one day got bit by a fucking snake no matter how big Never I'll shit my pants for the rest of my life. Charlie It's a fucking dog. Charlie jerking off. Hey Trying to do a goddamn show you relax
Starting point is 00:47:10 Come on try to pay the bills talking about getting bit on the dick by a snake But yeah, what would you rather get bit the tip of the side the shaft? Oh the shaft or the balls balls I'd rather lose a ball. Well, no, you're not gonna lose it Just like which one do you think has a higher pain tolerance? Definitely not the tip. I mean the ball the tip is the most sensitive, but the balls are also very sensitive Yeah I don't know. I don't know. It's like, you know, like Pick your poison at that point in time. You know what I mean? Like are you gonna be, you know drinking this?
Starting point is 00:47:38 That's gonna get you there or this is gonna get you there. Yeah, I No, thank you That's just that is seriously. You ever seen the videos of rats climbing through pipes. He had Yo, there was blood on the Toilet too like he bit the fuck out of this guy's car. I have no problem with blood If it came from my dick I got a big problem with it. Dick blood is different, dude That's fucked and and her dude's mom said he will be scared every time he goes to the goes to toilet
Starting point is 00:48:07 That's what it says. I'm that's a quote I read. Okay. I'm not being offensive I know what you're doing joey. It just says nonetheless. She predicts that her son quotes will be scared every time he goes to toilet I would I would be scared too. Yeah, I'm scared every time I'm walking in the fucking You know forest you think I won't be scared sitting on a toilet Bro, you ever you know, I stepped on a snake once accidentally Stepped on a snake. Yeah, dude It was a little baby one But like I thought it was just a twig and I stepped on it and it curled around my fucking and I freaked out
Starting point is 00:48:38 I'm not afraid of snakes Let me get this straight Yeah, you're afraid if it comes at me though fast I put two things in front of you a snake and a cockroach Which terrifies you more the cockroach what it's icky I'm not necessarily the snake. I'm not scared. Look at how it slithers and it's like a little like seductress It's not about fear like I'm not scared of these things. It's just it sounds like a fear joey No, they're like cringe like I can't
Starting point is 00:49:10 It's gross to me I am going to bring you to the Bronx Go to a pet land I am going to get them to the Bronx bro. You never been to the Bronx go walk on grand concourse There are people out there with snakes all the time And I'm going to have them put a snake around your neck Okay, and then I'm going to bring you to No, I'm not going to a bug also the Bronx
Starting point is 00:49:33 And go to oh by me in times river. There's a bug museum. We can go there. You can meet a couple bugs I would do anything but that I'm not fucking with that. No, I don't know you want to hold a cockroach What kind of fucking place is this? I've held a cockroach. It's stupid. Also, it's kick up in his pants. Let's get to these ads Here we have two more here we got folks we have Shopify Shopify is uh It gives entrepreneurs the resources once reserved for big businesses But it has everything you need to start your business your business big or small doesn't matter Shopify is where it's at. It's always what I use. It's what everyone who I know
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Starting point is 00:51:08 Shopify.com slash basement, okay And lastly here We have Titan and Titan is a very interesting thing because It's educational but also very helpful. So if you want to get into investing I think this is a good way to kind of get started because A lot of people they want to get into investing and they don't know how to go about it
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Starting point is 00:52:34 That is $50 when you go to titan.com slash basement and invest with Titan This is a paid this is a paid partnership with titan and at the time of publication I am not yet invested in titan's strategies. Okay Now lastly what we have here is Oh my god This is the one that you sent me Again New york post. Yeah, baby. That's where you get all the good news
Starting point is 00:53:06 Pennsylvania man Yeah hot start. Mm-hmm commonwealth punches, baby in the face There's more Pennsylvania man punches, baby in the face said he did it to get into heaven And I will say this right under no circumstances should you punch a baby in the face? But there it is If god is like, yo, son this baby I'll sneak you in. I'm fucking duffing that baby. Yeah, you think so
Starting point is 00:53:42 You think if you could see the paradise that is, you know, fucking the heaven and and and everything that that has that comes along with it You're hitting a one-year-old in the mouth Yeah, right at the teeth. How hard how hard? As hard as heavenly possible No, but it's fucked up, bro. So I'm gonna hit a fucking baby. Um, it was a 19 year old Bro, first of all I'll tell you this someone hits my baby either of my kids in the mouth. They're they're going. Yeah, you're going to have Trust me what I say. Yeah, you're gonna meet your maker real quick
Starting point is 00:54:13 Uh punch a one-year-old baby in the face at a house at a hospital. Yeah, so my understanding is that he was being admitted I I think admitted for uh Possibly some some mental health issues, which seems pretty on brand here Yeah, I don't think you could just punch a baby in bro. Why are people thinking that like what if god's a crazy god card? What if god really is doing this crazy stuff like he did tell David burkowitz like You know, he's like, you know, I'm the dog dude. Yeah, I'm the fucking dog here. All right What if that dog did tell exactly son of sam to start killing mother fuckers? Yeah, what if god was really ever in the interview the dogs?
Starting point is 00:54:49 The dog was dead. I think the dog had died. All right Um, but he was like talking to him check dogs. Yeah, check check all the dogs Check the dog But like what if god is up there Like just like hanging out with other gods and she'd be like, all right Watch this one and it like puts themselves in someone's head like fucking punch your baby Well, punch your baby and I'll see you soon something in the bible. Please do not quote me on this Oh, the joey's a big bible boy. Believe it or not. I don't pussy boy bible boy one two one. I'm pretty sure like abraham
Starting point is 00:55:17 That's a biblical name. He was killed his own son because he's a goof. Goof. He's like, yo guys said that shit I think it's like Goof goof. It's gooseth goof-eth or something like that Uh, what are you saying? I might be wrong here. No you you're not saying anything You're just making no, I think there's a word. It sounded like you were trying to say gogurt. No. I trust me I I know how to say go good. I love that shit. I do too almost bought him yesterday They make gogurt slushies now. I just want to put that out there. That sounds disgusting. It does, but Yep, I think it's like Gable and Guffith from the Bible or something like that. Look it up. Look it up
Starting point is 00:55:55 How do I spell this word that you're just a fifth? Okay, say it slow. Good G-u-h fifth F-i-f-t-h Nope Just type in Bible and then just put the letter G and see what pops up gateway. Nope. That's not a genesis No, that's the first one
Starting point is 00:56:18 That's the that's the magician's nephew. I was lying the witch in the wardrobe. You know what I'm saying stop making metaphors Frankie Gallant gallant and Guffith like that next one go babe you got gallant and and Guffiths yes What were you saying? Oh, no, it is Guffith Why do you know that It's spelled G-o-o F-u-t-h Yo, that's the worst name in the fucking world
Starting point is 00:57:16 Definitely in the Bible ABC no matter go forth Gallant and go forth Gallant and go forth go forth go forth your tongue's coming out. I know because you have to go forth. Yeah, there it is Go forth go forth How did I fucking pull that? Yo, that's fucking wild that you know that Go forth and I think that's the story of like the one brother killing the other brother to get into heaven or some shit
Starting point is 00:57:46 Oh, no, I think that's Cain and Abel. No, no, no, what's the story of Gallant and Guffith? I mean, I don't know Well, I'll look it up. I think I think there's a it's like a well-known like, you know, like how the Bible is all just like stories Oh It's a comic strip. Oh, what? No, this is it's a story in the Bible. Oh No, that's Goofis and get and Gallant
Starting point is 00:58:25 How is there more than one Gallant? How's there more than one Goofis? No, it's Goofis and Goofah Goofah, how's there more than one goo there? No, I don't know. I don't know what to fuck. Well, regardless, you can't find anything, but yeah, the Bible Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna read a Bible. It's about you know, like kind of like that Like you need to like, you know make this ultimate sacrifice in order to get to heaven Yeah, dude, just walked it up into a hospital and just fucking socked a baby I don't know even if I thought it was gonna bring in heaven. I don't know if I can punch a baby, dude Kind of gangster one-year-old maybe two
Starting point is 00:58:59 Yeah, no, two you could definitely knock down. They'd be all right. Well, one's crazy though dude one Yeah, one. I you know what's crazy is I have seen like Mentally and emotionally so many changes from having a biological child Yeah, like, you know, we had Miles and but I wasn't around when Miles was a baby baby Mm-hmm, and like obviously I treat him like my own child and have a soft spot for him We'll do anything for him, but like yeah, we read it knows to the very popular these days You're like the ultimate stepdad
Starting point is 00:59:28 Listen, man. I it's a thankless job It gets on the front page of Reddit thankless well my wife made that it's very adorable and it got a little tear in my eye But I don't do I think what I'm trying to say is not a thankless job It's I don't do it for the applause, you know, of course, of course But brawl, I don't know if I got punch a one-year-old like that really need to be a bastard Like a real one-year-old's gotta suck that real suck really gotta like say shit about my mom Consistently for like three months. I think that's so funny the idea that like God can be out there And it's just like fucking with people. Hey, you know, just I'm the dog now
Starting point is 01:00:06 You gotta kill and his dude punches the baby and God's like All right, you come to heaven Like drinking a fucking natty light Yeah, it's like we're relaxed the fucking I'll keep the baby alive. Yeah babies. It'll be a miracle. It has been healed He did it. He did it. Okay. Hold on. Yeah It is healed. Yeah all as well Damn what if you think God were to speak to you? What what would they tell you to do? I always think about what kind of voice God would have
Starting point is 01:00:40 You know, that's a good question a lot of people imagine like a Keith David or Morgan Freeman or something like that I imagine some shit with like a lot of reverb like a lot of like Johnny Cash That's not what reverb is. That's like that's a base. Yeah, I was Thinking of like like a big echo. Oh like a hello It's me God You sound like a Jewish grandmother
Starting point is 01:01:09 Okay, so what would like hello Okay, all right, you're pretty good there, you know, yeah Yeah, just like Nicholas Cage, which is some more reverb that did sound like this a little Nicholas cagey. Yeah, no I can't imagine it was me the whole time. You're like, that was Keanu The whole that was Keanu Reeves that you know, I watched speed the other day. Oh, that's like that's such a goodie We can't go off the bus Well, act with your eyes a little there is there is a move I forgot there's one line of that movie that is just fucking ruthless Dennis Hopper has the line in that movie that he says some shit
Starting point is 01:01:48 I don't remember exactly what it was, but it's fucking incredible So so you're saying that like God is just like a first of all you're saying it's a man. Wow Yeah, he's a man. Wow. Wow. God to me Good is like goes are like there's no gender. You don't know, you know, who's goes are you don't know goes are dude. No Are you serious? Who's goes are? Ghostbusters. Oh The guy no, you're talking about my god, Joe, you don't remember ghostbusters one Where the big gate opens at the top of the building and the gay the gate
Starting point is 01:02:25 Oh, oh, oh, and then like the like genderless monster comes out and it's like, are you a god? I thought that was like the hot woman No, that was Sigourney Weaver, which in that movie had it going on dude. You don't talk about shit names Sigourney's up there was fucking good for good. Yeah, I mean something though. Yeah, Sigourney Sigourney All right, what does Sigourney mean meaning of it's got to be like an Irish or Scottish name Signorita, you know Sigourney The conqueror Damn that's pretty fucking sick dude. My name is Sigourney
Starting point is 01:03:09 That's kind of sick. Well, what what if I would my name was Sigourney? What would you call me? Siggy or Gourney or horny horny Gourney horny Gourney. Yeah, there goes horny Gourney. There's there he is My shit is black, bro. What your name. Yeah, what does it mean? I put Joe just as a fellow Damn, I think my put Joseph. That's my name. I think Francisco means like of Kings or something like that Oh shit, dude, you know my name means what kind of dope to fucking spell it. What does it mean? God will give God will give you a fucking right hook to that baby. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, God did give what does Francisco mean? I think I remember it being like up Kings or something like that. Come on, baby. Give me something good Kind of sick it just says coffee. No, what?
Starting point is 01:04:03 No, it says free man. Oh Yeah, what does that mean? Wakanda, but you keep doing that. I think I'm a free man Yeah, well, yes Wakanda is a free nation fictional, but it is free sickest place ever and that looks pretty no lot of tech Yeah, you wish it wasn't free, right? Is that what you're saying if you shit, no, I loved it What's what's like a shit? Oh, let's look up like a shit named Bernard Yeah, I knew the whack. Sorry Bernie's
Starting point is 01:04:39 dude Bernard means strong brave bear. Oh How do the shit this name is have the dope is shit is good and for me. I Don't know if that's gonna be up there No Anthony Okay Priceless one That sounds like a whack tattoo Wilfred. That's a shit
Starting point is 01:05:09 Bad one meaning of Wilfred we're upset and a lot of people here peace Who the hell likes peace no one we're all about the war That was so badly time. No, is that profit off? No, so badly time. There's a war going all right one more time. Give me another shitty name Alfred. That's not shitty But like oh my god, that means elf or counsel. Maybe that's why they named him in fucking Batman Alfred Alfred Pennyworth What's that Alfred's last name? Oh, that's you didn't know that Alfred Pennyworth's last name was Pennyworth No, what does Olga mean? Oh
Starting point is 01:05:47 Blessed holy successful. Okay, great. What does What's that what's that Bertha grant oh grant Bertha means oh No What is Bertha bright one? Okay, what was you said would you say one side grant grant? The definition for grant no, yeah, this is like grant example grant name Tall big oh That makes sense like grant you grant you grant. He's not very tall. I don't think I think he's like five nine No, he got busted with a lady of the night in the 90s. Wow. You didn't know that he was hooking
Starting point is 01:06:33 I think he hook line and sinkered was she dope. I don't know. Does that make a difference? So if you get hook if you're hooking with a whack with a whack, yeah, then it's bad But if you're hooking with like a cool like a sick A Sigourney a Sigourney yeah, dude there are like high-end like yeah Escorts and shit like that and they they bang like Justin Bieber and like all them. Yeah, what yeah, dude He's married though. Not now. Oh, well, maybe now. I don't know when he was a kid When he was like, you know, he was around fooling around hooking in Germany or whatever. I don't know. I don't know That's what I heard
Starting point is 01:07:12 How do we do this every time where we start a topic and then get completely off the rails? I don't know but we we have just looked up a bunch of names, but anyway, I think we could wrap up here, right? Okay, absolutely word association go Mike one Really why is that oh you always say one dude, you're very bad at it word association go tombstone Hitch You're bad at this last one. You ready? Yep Go word association go cone one. What the fuck is wrong with you? I try dude. I'm funny anymore, dude Wrap it up. Give me all your money
Starting point is 01:07:46 We're gonna find your Frank if Alvarez 8085 on Twitter the Frank Alvarez on Instagram and Make sure you go check out the patreon patreon.com slash the base from your art and make sure you go check out Santa gato studios on YouTube tell your friends about the show we we love new people come in here and Having a good time with us. So, uh, yeah Yeah, you guys can follow me at Joe's and I go and go follow the show at the base me on on tiktok and Instagram And that is all tiktok is a gram See you guys next time. See you next time

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