The Basement Yard - #353 - I Was Arrested For Making Love
Episode Date: July 4, 2022Joe and Frank discuss how making love could get ya locked up! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome back to the basement. Yeah, it's recording. Oh, what'd you say?
I didn't think we were recording. Yeah, I was just talking about my plan to you know, rid the world of all of the whoa
Be careful because there was another speech in history that went that way and it went really bad
I was I was good to say people that hold their nose, you know talking about
patreon
Wait, what you remember we spoke about that on patreon babe do but you freaked me out summer teams summer teams
I do remember the patreon episode. Yes, welcome back. Hey, but what you're saying
Was terrifying. What did you what were you going to say at the end of that?
Rid the world of people that hold their nose. Okay. What do you think I was gonna say? You think it was gonna go?
It's I don't know. There's a guy whose name starts with a and it ends with
Dolph I
Know said something similar listen
I can I can read the subtext of what you're saying. Mm-hmm, and I know who you're talking about. We're talking about the Holly
Yes, yes, you are
But no, what's what kind of an evil person do you think I am Joey if anyone here would be a sympathizer
Sympathizer it would be did I tell you I went to like a World War two weekend one time and there were people
What does that mean Frank you went to a reenactment
There was a reenactment there and they were like it was like they sold like old guns and like it was just like old planes
They were selling muskets
First of all when the fuck do you think we had muskets Joe?
I don't know. We you've played all over to set in World War two
What the fuck do you think we were shooting?
No, we had it before. Yeah, we had MP 40s, you know
PPSH's yeah stg-44s. Yes car 98. That's a good one bars bars are great. Those are good ones
Thompson's we're done. Okay, but there were people
walking around
in full Nazi garb
Really? Yes, it was weird. Do you think they're hype to get cast as a Nazi or they're not I don't think they're cast
I think it's like they are like volunteers. Yeah, bro. We got up. That's it like we got a chill. That's weird
Yeah, that is fucking weird. You can't volunteer. That's like I
And I tweeted this because I've been watching the Miss Marvel TV show, which you haven't been watching it yet
No, there's a scene where she goes to like a comic-con type event called Avengers con
And there are people dressed up as as Thanos cool, and I said I was like, isn't that fucking weird
Like if you saw people like at a World War two weekend
It's weird if you see someone dressing up in like cosplaying as Hitler, right?
So like why in their world would they dress as the guy who tried to destroy the earth literally destroyed half of the fucking population
Yeah, weird
Wow, doesn't make sense. Honestly, that's looked right by him didn't it I
Would I would think that they didn't think much into it? Yeah, but you know your boy is on top of it
Yeah, yeah, but yeah
It was weird seeing people cosplaying as Nazis because it's like hey
I don't think you realize what you're doing there. No, I mean they do but I do so wait home
What was the reenactment like they had like there was like a shootout. I've told the story
I walked through a reenactment accidentally. Oh, I've always wanted to go to like cuz don't they have them in Pennsylvania
We're like they do like fucking Gettysburg. Yeah, they have them a Gettysburg
I would love to go to a civil war reenactment and see some dude
Would you careful if you hear my father-in-law say that he will drive here right now rip you from this office and bring you why he's
Really big he's a big time history buff. Is that his favorite war? He's a he's a big world war. What's your favorite war?
Um, mine's World War two. I would say the war on white men. Oh, okay. Yeah, that's an ongoing one. That's a good one
Yeah, that may never end. You never know exactly. Uh, no, I would I I
Hate history, but like I do find World War two interesting
It's cool war. It was pretty pretty cool war also the best video games come from a war two
They they do they do but I'm not a big history guy. No
But yeah, I walked through I got to this World War two weekend thing in Pennsylvania
Where it all happens for some reason and I have the land I'm walking through and there's like
Fucking like buildings and shit and like there's like kids with like trying to sell newspapers on the street and shit like that
They have children working this thing too. Yes, it's fully immersive very and I was like wow
They're really they're eating beans out of fucking like cans stone cans. Yes, do they have
Stone can't do they have like restaurants where you go and you like, you know, they're not there
But they it was it was they drew the line at the food that they were served
Ah, that sucks, you know, I mean there it was kind of weird because there was like one stand
It was like they just had like bratwurst and it was like oh
Oh
We shouldn't we should probably probably yeah, just do hot dogs because always dogs up in season
Oh, yeah, well obviously also a very American it is. Oh, it's an American day. By the way, it's the 4th of July
It's not July. We're not recording this on the 4th of July. No, we're not otherwise
I'd be you know, you're choking down some hot dogs and three sheets to the wind
What's that mean? You'd be hammered. Oh, is that what that means? Yes, it does three sheets to the wind
Yes, yes, how does that even line up what happens when you put three sheets in the wind?
They blow away there. They can't you know, whoa, why three?
It might even be two. I might be fucking that up
How many sheets to the wind yeah
I walked through this reenactment and didn't realize that I shouldn't have been walking there
And then I started hearing gunshots three sheets three sheets
Did you think that we were under attack in that moment or no?
I would I literally got scared and then I ran out the other side and they were like it was a full-on reenactment
Which looks gotta say
Very fun. It does. I'm like into larping. I would hard LARP, dude. Yeah, like and also
I'd win
I was just gonna say you'd be the type that they would stab you and then be like you're dead
And you'd be like no you didn't you got under my arm. I'm actually still alive. I would just be you're dead
I would be arguing like this is chain mail. Yeah
You know like but I went like when you like the movie role models where he did like that sort of larping like
Yo, that doesn't not seem like I don't see that as being like
Insanely nerdy. I I think it is nerdy. It is nerdy, but like
It's kind of sick
Dude kind of it is super fucking sick. Anything where I can get a sordom in
I want it like I want to one day go to like they have him in central park where it's like they have
Fucking battles dude with like 150 people one time. I was at a cent. I was at central park
I was riding my bike there. I rode my bike from here to there and I'm going around a loop simple flex
And then at an exercise in health. Yeah, no, I know exactly when you had abs over a very
When you had abs over a bridge it was this whole thing not not many people can do it. No, I bet um, yeah as I was completing this feat of
strength I
Was like pulled over on the side
Because I think someone I was with had like a phone call or something
And I look and there's like this group of guys. They're wearing metal
Oh like full like oh, they're hitting the shit out of each other really in the middle of central park
Oh, I thought it was just like a play because they have swords that are made of foam
Dude, if they weren't wearing protection
Dead really I was like, yo this head I mean some policeman on a horse is gonna gallop up
That's it. I'm like, yo get on the back. You're arrested make it part of it. That'd be super sick
I I kind of have never done anything sord related in my life
But I think I would be awesome at it. I feel like I have an uh
I don't know this to be true, but I do think that I had I know my way around a sword
Yes, like I feel like I just I have a knack for sorting
Do you think if you ever see anything historical whether it be show movies, whatever or like documentaries?
Yeah, do you instantly think that you're smarter and better than every person that came before you?
Yeah, I mean I do that now too. There's a problem. I'm working on. I'm in therapy, but I
Well, I said came before you not that you sit across a desk from oh, well, yeah, well that one too. That's a big issue
No, but all of those movies I see right
Two things cross my mind one. I feel like
I know for a fact that I'm not good with a bow and arrow, but whenever I watch these movies
I'm like, you know, I'd be fucking good with a bow for some reason and then two
I don't think the bow and arrow guys
Get enough respect as they should they should they get they deserve way more respect hawkeye is a pretty cool character
A fucking bow and arrow is so cool
Dude because it's like there's something about it. That's like it's not like when you shoot someone
It's like the gun did the work when you do a bow and arrow that fucking archer did the work
You know what I mean? So like they deserve more respect than what's hitting them, dude
I'm good with bow and arrow
I've also when I watch like lord of the rings or something right and they have just or just like any type of movie
Where there's like a castle and shit
They have all these archers on the top thing and the guy's like ready and then they fucking all
First of all, this is the coolest feeling in the world. Just having our sword just going like this and then just fucking arrows
How does anyone
store my castle
How do you make it just keep shooting arrows? How do they not die? They got they got swords
And a lot of people would have shields in front of them and they'd put shields on top of them
So they'd like try to run and you know together
So it's harder for the arrows to hit people. I don't know. It's pretty cool
A goal that I have by the end of my lifetime is to go to a larping thing and I want to like you said
I want to be the person that just takes the sword. Yeah, and just I want to fight a king
do
Do you think I think if we push the tables back in here, we set some cameras up
Oh, you want to warp me that would be a good me and you sword fighting
I'd sword fight. Yeah, I'd be pretty aggressive though. I have to say
Yeah, you'd be one of like the yeah like I'd be on my back
And you'd be talking shit to me and then just like hitting my sword while I'm blocking
Yeah, yeah, yeah cut my eye a little bit a little bit. I'd get you and I'd stab your leg
Yeah, it would be my own hubris that took me down. Exactly. You know ego is what takes you down
And I'm like I'm sitting there bang bang bang and then tiring myself out
This is for my father who you you know did something too, but I didn't actually do you just think it was yeah
I don't know your dad your dad did it on his own. I didn't have to do anything right exactly
No, well now we're blending real life and we're talking about got fantasy
Well, if it's not if you know everything's based off something reality stranger than fiction. That's true
But I would like to get into a sword fight as well. I think we could kill it as sword fighters
I really do. You know what I think about all the time. I feel like I would have made a really good pirate
Dude, you would have because you're ruthless. Yeah
You're ruthless and you're a drunk. I honestly yes, I feel like I like boats. I do like drinking
But more so than hanging with the boys and also I'm I'm actually super hyped when there's a little monkey around big first of all
Yeah
Confirmed big boys time guy you are big boys time and on top of liking those things
You're whenever you're I've seen you on a boat. You're always perched
You know like you're never just like sitting on a boat board. You're like holding onto something like yeah
You know like you're you're ready for another boat. I am I am I am you might have been a
Pirate in a I hope so bro and also remember I was talking about like I would love some shillings
Like I would love shillings would be cool. I'm okay with robbing shillings would be cool. Also, I'm okay with robbing boats
I don't think that you should rob people on land, but I think if you're on the sea it's fair game
Yeah, you get your boat robbed bro get a better boat
I don't know if you don't on the boat no one cares if you have guns on boats
But if you have guns on land, we got a big old problem. That's a huge issue. I'm saying this
I think I would be a really good pirate because I'm very good at evading people
Like you'd be a good like I'd be a good I'd be a good like, you know, like I'm sitting there
To be like today is the day. Yo most cult captain Frank and I fucking with my sword hit a rope
And then the fucking rope pulls me up and then I'm gone. Yeah, you're just describing a scene from
From from pirates of the Caribbean. Yes, but I'm saying like the times I remember playing manhunt as a kid
Yeah, I was very good at like you would be chasing me out this door
We'd both I'd get out the door you'd be a split second behind but I'd be gone
You'd be in the wind. Yeah, you know and I think I'd be a good pirate because of that and I'd have
But I'd do it better than them because I would fucking lie
You think pirates were
honest men. Yes
Bro, they'd be like
They'd have a fucking crude hand drawing of a pirate from one island and they'd hold it up and they'd be like
Are you are you
Redbeard and they'd be like yes, I am
They'd fucking be caught already. I'd be like, who the fuck is that? That ain't me
I don't know man. I'd be a big time bro pirates big time liar. They'd never catch me
They'd be like, all right. That's blackbeard. You could tell by his signature black beard. Just shave that son of a bitch
They'd never know. No, no, you can't shave your beard as a captain. You can
Also, there's a jail
That's kind of cool
Well, you could still do that if that's just yelling people on your
But also how did jails work back then you just put them in there. Yeah, but like
There wasn't a sentence. It was like, we're just gonna let them die in this. They were made of fucking mud and clay
I would just burrow my way through with my fingernail
I'd be out bro. They had iron. They were shooting cannibals. What is that lead or something? I don't know. It's a good question
the fuck is a cannibal made out of cannibal I think is
probably led
Bro, the the invention of a cannibal imagine you can hit with a cannibal
You would not you don't have to imagine you would not exist. You would be spontaneously combust
Those things are fucking
Pirates are fucking cool, man. Those are my favorite criminals. What are the favorites?
What's your favorite criminal? Um, I'm pretty cool. Pirates are pretty cool. Is there like a known pirate?
Uh
There's gotta be they're all spanish first. That's the other thing. I already got the heritage for being a pirate and
My twirly mustache is nothing to not write home about. You know what I'm saying
Oh, wait, is black beard a real pirate? Yeah, dude. So is red beard, dude
Black beard is probably the most well-known pirate in history even though his life is shrouded in mystery
Much of what we know about him and other pirates at the time comes from a 1724 book
published under the name captain charles johnson
That sounds fake. That's a really stupid pirate name, dude. Captain charles johnson. What would be your pirate name?
I don't know. It would be charles johnson. That's a white piece of shit. That's really bad
My white piece of shit in this lifetime. You got I'm gonna go back and be a pirate. My name's gonna be fucking
Steve I'd be I'd be I
I'd be pirate frank the shank
Frank the shank. Yeah, but you're just like making like rest our names
Oh, damn. This is fun. He
1716 he returned he turned to pirating in the Caribbean Sea
And off the coast of South Carolina and Virginia in his ship's name the queen and's revenge
You know how fucking cool it must be to be a like a sick pirate like imagine you're a black beard if people don't know you right
And then they they have their like telescope and they're like, what the fuck?
And then all of a sudden they see that sail and then you're looking you're already
Right at these guys and then you see them just panicking. You're like, oh, we got we got them
And then I would scream at the top of my lungs
Fire and I would blow every fucking cannon straight through that dock because that's the cool part camp ships
Canons hitting people not that cool cannons hitting wood. You ever see a cannon hit wood?
Yeah, it's amazing. Cool, dude. Sinking a ship that people are on is fucking cool
Nothing is more American in 4th of July than wanting to be a pirate
Do you believe it's very what what what do you say?
That's it
Sinking ships that people are on is fucking cool
It's crazy because I know how funny that sounds, but man who I mean that yeah, no you do and honestly
I'm not cruise ships. I'm not a pirate ships. Yes pirate ship like a rival pirate titanic not nearly as funny as
St. Anne's revenge
St. Anne's revenge. Yeah, if if the if the fucking if we found out through time that it wasn't an iceberg
It was blackbeard
I probably know a little less bad. That'd be the most dug shit. I'd ever heard
Yeah, bro. He took down a whole fucking the biggest cruise ship in the world at the time
Yeah, that was like you kid pirates today. Can't do that. No, maybe found pretty quickly
Yeah, there are pirates today, but they're not as like smally pirates. That's the only ones I know
I'm sure there are pirates in other parts of the world, but like not as cool
Well, technically if we commit crime in the sea we're pirates
Oh my god, so we could become pirates fairly easy if not. Yeah, I wait hold on
Is it illegal to pee into the ocean?
While whilst on the ocean no fuck
That was almost a pirate. It's illegal to pee in front of people you don't know
On the ocean. I'm thinking of the barge when we were on in Key West
Oh, yeah, any of us were any of us pirates as a result
No, god damn it. I don't think you'd be a pirate in Key West very well
Trust me. There are plenty of different kinds of pirates in Key West
Bing bong pirates. Yes. Um, all right very very close to being pirates this close
What we were this close we could have done something illegal out there if we would have like stole a boat
I don't even know that you could steal a boat. You're just a criminal
But if you are on a boat you jump on someone else's boat you hold them on a gunpoint you take their shit
Then you get on your boat and you leave pirate now you're a pirate pirate which
If I had to commit one crime that would be the one dude. I mean does it count if you're on a lake?
Or is it only the open you want to steal someone's stuff on a boat?
I'm just saying like if we came across someone on a lake that we are easily have access to
And like hopped on their boat and took their beer
Because I'm not beer
Oh, no, I'm gonna kill anyone either. But like that's what they would do. They would plunder dude
They would steal barrels of rum from people
No, I know
So like if we come across a boat on the lake if we come across a boat on a lake with it
With a bunch of old women who have like a ton of cash and beer
We have to pull over
And we take the beer and the money and before we leave you fucking elbow one of them just to say
Just to be rough you're leaving a set of message. You're leaving a trail dude. That's contact. No contact contact tracing man
I'm not gonna spit on her and leave my dna. I'm just gonna soccer
Oh, yeah, because that won't leave any fucking
Imprintations of your fists upon an old woman's cheek. Don't tell me how to pirate
You have to leave some sort of clue
And a message so people know we're the ones so what would be your calling card?
Like a if it it would just be old women just do just leave a hundred dollar bill
Okay, that would be your calling card because you know your money bag joe. Oh god. Yeah, I understand
Well, that's not what we plan on talking about
It is 4th of july it is and you know a lot of people celebrate to the
Independence of the united states
And you're not remember the trump united states united states
Um, yeah, so if you're out there right now and you're not sucking a dog
What the fuck honestly right now if you're watching this right now, it's the 4th of july
Take a pic go get a fucking hot dog who pause this who pause it go get a hot dog cover it
In a bunch of shit whatever you want or don't and then send us a picture of you watching it with the hot dog
Dad I want to see that's fucking porn. We I gotta say we have gotten some
Incredible dog sucking season posts. Also. I got one. I got a fucking the pussiest dog
Oh, what was it such a prude dog? Oh, no, what happened? It was just a regular dog
You want to dog that bitch up and then it was like it was just mustard, but the mustard looked like like
Like it was like a pitiful amount of mustard really if you're gonna go mustard, which we're not proponents of
But if you're gonna go mustard like mustard mustard it up
Yeah, why don't that set a bitch up make this thing a little slutty smack it suck it and fuck it. Yeah, that's the I mean, yeah
That's how you're supposed to eat a hot dog. Where are you at for dogs? Have you can you give me a rough count?
Brian, honestly, I'm I'm slacking and it's not 4th of july for us right now, but I'll say this right now on the 4th of july
It's going it's going not up and I'm gonna get some chili
Oh, oh chili dog
You're not going to be at my birthday party this year, but it's going to be a dog sucking extravaganza
Yeah, it's gonna um, I will say this. Yep. Um, I am at at least 21 dogs since memorial day
And I feel good. I think you're higher than me
Honestly, that whole like dogs take 35 minutes off your life thing
I don't believe because if joey chestnut is still alive lord knows he's eating enough to be dead in a week
You think that guy pukes I would hope so I would hope so too
How do you live with yourself after sucking down that many of anything and not throwing up everywhere?
That is a big also. What are that poop? Was that poop like uh, I don't want to know
It probably comes out the same way it looks going in
Like just like soft serve. Oh, I always thought you were just talking about a full hot dog
Oh, well, maybe maybe that too because he doesn't really swallow
She does well. I'm saying he doesn't chew is what I meant. He chews
I know but he's just like jamming it in there. That was a bad thing to do. Yeah, that's gonna get fucking clipped for sure
That is right there. That was a bad thing to do. Are you gonna watch the dog this the sucking competition?
Sometimes if I'm like if I'm not like outside drinking or something you think our boy crazy legs is in it this year
Ooh, maybe if he is you gotta send him a send him a shirt and have him wear it
Uh takes it way too seriously
I don't think he'd be he'd be open to that sort of thing. Yeah. Um, but yeah, I try to watch it
But then I after a while I'm watching I'm like, what am I watching? This is insane. How many realistically do you think you could do?
Honestly, yeah
Six
Yeah, I would say that's that's fair and that would be very hard for me. There was one year that we did it with full screen
But I was like joking around like I put ketchup on them and I like I didn't dunk them in water
And I also was like drinking a butt heavy and I ate three
15 minutes three and 15 minutes
That's not a lot. So no, it's not but at that point I was like, yo, this is this is a lot of food
Yeah, you know like granted I was drinking a beer and like fucking around too
But like if I was really getting after it like I think I could have maxed on six 15 minutes is like 15 minutes
I think I could do five six
At most I would say because in a normal sitting I'll have four
Yeah, but the sitting is a long time. I'm taking my time. I'm also having
Burgers with it whenever I have dogs and most of the time I also have a burger. Yeah
Damn, this might be something that we need to test out a hot dog. So fucking bad
Yeah, I kind of want to crush a hot dog right now. There needs to be hot dog trucks everywhere
Yeah, I don't know why there are not more hot dog like restaurants
Like I want like a like a sit-down restaurant. There was when I went to LA. I went to one
Damn, they had it was just dogs, but it wasn't just hot dogs. They had like
Chicken they had brought but anything you could put that looks like a hot dog anything that looks like a dig
Yeah, it was a cock shaped sort of place and they had beers there too
Really good. Well, I would I assume if you have hot dogs, you need to have a beer of some sort
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All right. All right. All right
Um, I wanted to talk about something something we haven't talked about in a very long time forever soccer
Oh
Yeah, no, so, uh, the world cup's happening soon football football not soccer
But we're american pieces of s
Um, but the world cup is in katar
Hot
Uh, my understanding. Yeah, never been personally pretty hot. I've never been there either. Um, but apparently
Uh, there was a report that came out that said that, uh,
You know, well, I mean because it's it brings people from all over the world to this country
Wherever it is when it was in south africa. That's right. Fuck in brazil or wherever the fuck
It's coming to new york
2026 2026 and the united states, but it's gonna be indigark. Um
We're in new jersey. I technically yeah jersey. Yeah, what's up? Uh, but uh in katar. They have some serious rules about
sags
What are the rules sex? Well, I know I heard what you said sex frank inter corns
inter corn
But it has announced that they will be enforcing a hold on
And you get this clean so that people understand what I'm saying clean up the sex
The world cup is in katar and katar has just announced that it will be enforcing a sex ban ahead of the world cup
Meaning one night stands could face up to seven years
Behind bars and convicted. So if you get caught with your pants down and you're ding dong in a v-bang
You're going to jail
I
You're ding dong in a v-bang. That's really good. Could you imagine being in prison and someone's like
What are you doing time for is like man armed robbery? What are you doing time for man? I'm doing time for fucking
You know for pussy for for for eating pussy. Yeah, damn. That's got honestly though. That's some admirable shit to go to prison for
Yeah, kind of ling ding dong. Yeah, there's gonna be you know, there's gonna be one hero
There's gonna be one at least one hero who gets locked up for like pleasing a man or a woman
And they're just like, you know, that's the most selfless shit in the world. I don't know that they'd be cool with
Gay stuff. No, I'm saying women pleasing a man or or yeah. Well, no, I don't think they're very cool with gay stuff over there
And I don't know but I'm assuming no, I can almost guarantee
I believe they have a law that bans
Same-sex marriage. So like if they're not cool with people loving each other like, you know
Definitely not cool with people bugging on each other
What what do you do? Well, you know what I mean
What was that, you know, just like, you know
Elaborate on that, please. We're gonna move forward. Uh
There will be no partying at all really everyone needs to keep their heads
About them unless they want to risk being stuck in prison
There's essentially a sex ban in place at this year's World Cup for the first time ever fans need to be prepared
A police source added sex is very much off the menu unless you're coming as a husband and a wife team
There will definitely be no one-night stands at this tournament
So if you're just a single ready to mingle kind of lad
Who's interested in in soccer
Keep that dick in your pants
You know that there's some like 23 year old intern with NBC that's going over there
But he's like leaving behind their partner and there's like, babe. I won't do anything even if I wanted to it's illegal
And they're just going to use that the whole time is their defense and it's like I am a law abiding citizen
There's no drinking in public law, which makes sense. Yeah, that makes sense
Uh
It the country prohibits anyone from being publicly intoxicated. Isn't that every country?
Oh, I guess like in like vegas or something. Yeah, I I think in vegas
It's like if you're not drunk you're more in trouble than if you are drunk
Public affection between men and women is also a crime and one is to not wear
excessively revealing clothing in public
Yeah, bro. It's gonna be hot
You know, you're gonna expect they're they're gonna expect that the women are wearing pants and the men are wearing
I think the men can do whatever they want over there because you know standards
Dude, I don't would you go to world cup if you couldn't like
Wear a t-shirt. I'm sure they can wear t-shirts joey, but like they can't have their fucking balloon pies banging out in the middle of the street
Balloon
You know like I love that you can't have a woman walking around just like just full just full mount
Yeah, full mast in the middle of the street. I see what you're
You get like I think that's what they're but I think they can wear no, I know I'm being I'm conservative t-shirts
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can wear like graphic tees and stuff
Yeah, like if you're walking down the street with a shirt that says like it's wine o'clock somewhere. You're good
Oh, those people should be thrown
Those people should be thrown in jail, you know, whatever, but uh, that's very much different
Don't talk to me before my coffee force this law
I imagine that they're gonna be like
I assume there's no like bars
Dude, maybe they they take like complaints is like by the way
I heard something last night. You're gonna want like how do they check that too?
Like what's the due process like over there?
Are they gonna like walk in and like ask guys to be like, yo, let me smell your dick if it smells like either bunge or bunge
You're fucking going away. I think so. Maybe they're smelling penises over there
That would be a pretty crucial way. You'd have to prove in a court of law
That they did actually have sex
Maybe they just walk in and out of hotel rooms and they're like if it smells like a sex musk because it smells there is a sex musk
Yeah, uh, they don't have sex in a hotel
That there's no windows for ventilation. Well, then not that there's no windows
But you say what a fucking prison if you've been to joey not no windows
I meant like the window isn't open and then you like go to the bathroom or something and then you come out and you're like
There's a sex smell and when it hits you it fucking smacks you in the mouth. Yeah
So like maybe that maybe they have like, you know, like they have examples of sex smell sense
That like officers carry around with them. They have guard dogs that could smell pussy
Can you imagine they train their dogs to smell sex? Yeah, they're like, yo
You smell here just bring the dog in just like because you know how they like bring them in and they hold them
Yeah, yeah, they're both. Where's the pussy? They're just like
Yeah, no if the dog sits, then it's like, oh, there's pussy. There's pussy here 100. Where's the fucking pussy, dude?
They sit. Yeah, they like you were getting pussy in here 100%
I think someone was getting pussy in here and they do the black light. Can you imagine that?
Oh the black the black light is what gives it away the door and she's been like
Hurt someone's getting pussy in here
true
TRF
Not me sir. Not me sir
Stand back. They just fucking flick the light and this black light just looks like a Jackson Pollock painting in there
Oh my god
The dog can you imagine doing that? There's got to be at least one person in the world
That checks into a hotel and brings a black light and does that. Yeah, I am prefer not
I am cool not knowing if there was sex on those sheets like unless it like a
Oh, there has been oh
When I went to Miami the first time I went with my family
We stayed at like a fucking like a hotel
Six or a motel or one of the you know, one of those like Howard Johnson's or knockoff brands or whatever some shitbag place
Yeah, and we got in and I there was droplets of blood on my dad's blanket
And I was like dad dad's blood and he's like no went to sleep didn't give a fuck your dad. Yeah, he didn't care
Oh, I'm not cool with blood at all. I'm not cool blood at all, but I'm saying like if there's blood
there's
Yeah, if there's smoke there's fire it bingo
Bingo, yeah
But there was one time I went to I went I drove to Ohio
and we stayed at a motel and the
The room that we got
They uh, there was ants in the bed and I was like I went to the front desk. I was like, bro
There's ants in the fucking bed. I'm the ant dude
ants
Okay, and if it's not bed bugs the fuck do you care? What does an ant get to do to you?
Like eight million of them are gonna fucking pick you up and like
You move me around
No, bro, you would sleep in a random bed that had ants in it. I guess not
You'd be like, can I have a room that doesn't have fucking ants? Yeah, that's true. And then the next room
that I went to
Uh
There was no ants
But there was like in the back that was you could see that the rug had been cut into a square
Oh, that's that's big time blood. So I was like, what the fuck and then I
Lifted it
And the floorboards were like very discolored like a weird color. Mm-hmm, but not dark. It was like a light
And I was just like, I'm not gonna ask
But probably blood. Yeah, I mean someone was probably
Blutted in there. Oh, I was yeah, I was gonna say there. Yeah something happened whether I assumed that any hotel room that I stay at
That isn't like a very nice hotel
Someone died in someone pissed in someone sexed in oh
I mean those are the three quadrants of life in any hotel. I mean that's what most hotels slash motels were used in history
It's like they're gonna go meet up with a mister or a mistress. They're gonna do sex
They're gonna kill someone or what was the other one?
Um
Piss that's it
Well, if you think about it any of those two things could also include piss, so it's gotta be true
Sex could include piss like anytime I go on a plane
I have to have the realization like I put myself here if I die
I can't be mad at anyone else. You know what I mean? I'd be pretty tired
I'd be upset, but like I'd be like I made my own choices
you know
but
I have to have the same
sense of like
I put myself in this hotel room if there's come on the walls. I'm cool with it
Let me ask you a question
When you're in a hotel, right?
And you get into the bed, you know how like hotels they like tuck the fuck out of my bed. Holy shit. It's very very toyed
Yeah, do you like that or you hate it? I like it. I don't mind it. I don't like it really
I don't I feel like I'm in a hot pocket. Really? Oh, what's wrong with being in a hot pocket?
I actually like the idea like I like being in a sleeping bag
But I don't like that. It's so tight my feet my feet are like crushed really. I love it. I really do
I feel like I'm jamming my feet into ballerina shoes
You probably are I enjoy it because it's a sense of comfort and safety
but
You can't recreate that outside of that room. No, I can't tell you how many times I've tried to hotel make my own bed
Can't happen doesn't fucking work. No, it's like there's something about that area. They're professionals. They're quite
There's something about the room and the sheets and stuff that makes it work my bed can't do it
Yo, and that's one of my least favorite things in the world is
Two of my least favorite things in the world
Besides, you know murder and yeah, the bad ones the big ones. Yeah
Folding laundry, okay, and making a bed
And there's whole jobs dedicated to those two things that like all day
Someone just goes from room to room and just makes beds. Yeah, I would
Hello, yeah, well a lot of those people are not doing it because they want to they are doing it out of necessity to provide for their family
Joey Frankie no one's saying that they want to I'm not saying like these people are crazy
I'm saying I can't believe the fact that people are subject to that sort of thing. Yeah
Well, you know, that's the way the world works. Joe, but I am with you there
There are certain things like there are people that taste test mustard. You know, I
Wouldn't do that. No, I'd like to be a taste tester. I'd like to be a taste. Bro. Did you ever see that must have been the coolest?
Oh, no, you didn't have a
You son of a bitch I was gonna say I feel like that was probably the coolest part of having a wedding
It was a very cool part. What we got. Did you guys have food?
Yeah, Joey, it was a fucking wedding not I mean what you think we were going into our wedding a week out and not having taste tested the food
Wait, you had like a caterer. We had the hall. Did they had chefs? Oh really? Yes, what?
Bro, why the fuck would I know that it was in your backyard? It was cold because you've been to eight. Oh, no
Well, yes at our backyard. That's what I was saying. You're a wedding. Oh, oh, oh, yes
No, we did we got it. We ordered a caterer to come and cater our wedding
Oh, okay, which I was referencing is my wedding was canceled twice and then
Uh, we just ended up getting married in the backyard. Yeah, which was adorable cute fun
We had a caterer come and we taste tested some of their food
Okay, because I was gonna say that's probably the best part about having a wedding
Not marrying your soulmate. Yeah. No, no not that part. It's being able to try a bunch of different types of cake
Bro, the first venue that we that was like we were using for our actual wedding
We were so heartbroken and we passed by it all the fucking time
And you know, obviously, of course, we were upset
hindsight actually kind of worked out for us because we have a house now because of it but
Uh, they had some fucking slamming food dude. They had
I mean, I know this is not a fucking like crazy idea, but for I've never seen it in a wedding venue. They had fucking
Tap a beer built into the wall
So like anyone can just go up and just serve their own beer
They had fucking like
Just the food was great and it was really really really sick and we always said that one day
We're gonna have a party there for like our friends and family for no reason
Just invite people to come just so we can reap the benefits of what that was because that was fucking good
What well would have been good. It would have been good because that that was good. Yeah. Yeah
Oh sex at the world cup
Yeah, no, you know, it's fucking that's kind of crazy because that's a very horny area
Isn't it known as like the world cup and like Olympic village is like a very horny. No, I mean the world cup
I don't know but the but the the Olympic village. Yeah, people are fucking sucking all the time
Fucking suck on all the time not before the big game or the big race. No, you got to be prepared for that
You can't do that trains the last four years for this. Do you remember that?
Uh, I don't know if it's a myth, but like in high school. I remember people saying like
No sexual contact with anyone before like the night before a big game because it'll ruin your game
Yeah, or like there's some UFC fighters that are like they won't have sex because they lose like testosterone or something
I don't I don't even I don't think that's true. I asked my bro
I didn't follow any of the like it is even in like high school like before
Yeah, you didn't follow because you weren't having sex with anyone joey fucking loser. I'm not
Hahaha
I'm saying like
All the things growing up that they tell you not to do like where they're like don't eat eat 30 minutes before going swimming
I was like fuck this no that one don't do no, I've done it mad times. Yeah, doesn't mean you should I don't think that's real
Joey it is absolutely real. What's real? What is it? They get a cramp. Yeah, you're fucking cramp up and drown
If you're going in you're going from your body's trying to fucking digest your food joey and but what why is it the water?
Because you're trying to swim
Okay, but how many times have you eaten and then done a thing?
Yeah, not a full body full body workout like fucking never eating a sandwich and going to play basketball game
I've done that countless times. No, I don't think not immediately after
Definitely within after 30 minutes. I would say bullshit. No bullshit. I don't think it's bullshit. Don't cross your eyes
They'll stay like that bullshit my mom and grandma are yeah, that was stupid and they are liars
Yeah, they're irish catholic liars. Yes, they are
I remember the one that I legitimately believe in too is like don't drink soda before like any like
Sports games or anything like that because we knew a kid who
Like it was going out of style drank Pepsi like exclusively wouldn't drink Gatorade wouldn't drink water drank Pepsi
And drank like a fucking like a bottle of Pepsi before a football game
The first play of the game cramped up both his hamstrings and they were like bro. You're fucking dehydrated and shit like
Well, I mean, I don't think that the soda is the cause it's the dehydration
Well, not having water. It was because you're only drinking soda. Well, yeah
I'm saying it's not just like don't drink soda because it'll blah blah. You know what I mean? Yeah
No, I some of that shit I agree with but like the whole like as you were saying like don't don't cross your eyes
I'll get stuck like that all stupid shit from stupid parents that were stupid idiots
Yeah, or like oh if you eat all those potatoes, you're gonna turn into potato. No, I'm not or or
The one where it was like don't put the light on in the car. It's illegal
Yeah
Is it illegal? No, I don't know. I don't think so
Don't put your feet on the dashboard. I don't think that's illegal either
That's just dumb. That's dangerous. Yeah, I don't do that. Not illegal
Yeah, I don't think it's illegal. It's illegal to drive without a shirt. One time a cop pulled me over. What?
Yeah, and what they say nice abs. No, they
Good thing you did that really hard bike ride. I was leaving the fucking beach and I had a
My shirt off
Because I was like wet still. Yeah, and I was leaving and the cop
Like was like you got to put a shirt on and I'm like why I said you can't drive without a shirt
I was like, I did not know that. I didn't know that either. That's a really stupid one
Yeah, I don't understand no pants because you know, I can't have your fucking dick out. You can't have your dick in ball bags out
Also, I
Drive barefoot a lot
Yeah, I don't think I think that's another one of those myths
I think it's like they're I don't think you're not allowed to do it, but you probably shouldn't
I don't think you're allowed. Oh, I could be wrong, but I'm probably not
Well, you can't
So you're driving with slippers is dangerous because the slipper can come off your foot and then just like yes that one
I I would agree with I wouldn't do that. I don't tend to do it. Can't get blown
That's a that's a one two
Can't get road head
And yet
Roadhead prevails roadhead is still a thing. When do you think they first started doing roadhead?
Oh when they had horses
I was gonna say when it was the cars that had like the like fucking like the model t they draw the shades
Oh, yeah, oh definitely you're getting sucked in that bro. Are you kidding me? Someone else way before that. I'm saying
Like a horse and carriage. They're probably getting oh people were fucking going to town on each other's dunges. Which is
It's
No, what was the first sort of like I guess a horse but you can't get sucked on a horse
The first form of transportation. I would say oh, what about why don't you just do this horse drawn carriages
Was that the first thing?
Not the first but like you have to imagine like it was horseback
They would just put some rope and like a box with a wheel on the end of it
Yeah, think about like the wild west they had like a bunch of horse drawn carriages the horse you have the horse walk
You think anyone's ever gotten blown on a hay ride
Yes, dude
Hundred percent rolling in the hay. You think that ain't the thing
Yeah, rolling in hay is different than a hay ride. It's very bouncy. I would I would assume
I haven't been on a hay ride in quite some time. I've been on a hay ride in the last five years. Really?
Yeah, I don't remember last time I was on one. I think my nephew
We went to like pumpkin picking or something and there was a hay ride and I was like
See gotta go on I'm gonna get on this bitch
I I I would imagine that if there is a flat surface and not enough people like there's sex going on on it
I can almost guarantee it
Like a boat having sex on a boat. How do you not know this mr.
Fucking porn category guy. You always know these porn categories. Where's like I saw a porno with that once
I've never seen a hay ride
Blow I can almost do a quick google. I can almost guarantee that there is a hay ride sex porno. What should I type in?
Hay ride sex porno, I guess
Sex porno hay ride blowjob
Well
There's a done. Yeah, okay. No, I don't want to
As long as it it exists then we know. Oh, no, I mean no, this one just says I fuck my stepdaughter hannah haze
Hay spelled like hay hay ride
But no hay ride. Oh, oh the person's name is hannah haze. Okay. I was like I was trying to figure that one out
This might be on a hay ride
Right now. It's just kissing. This is a bj scene
Uh, they are
They're just they're not on a hay ride. They're just in a bunch of hay like this is where they keep
Oh rolling in the hay is different. I'm we specifically said hay ride
This needs to be moving and bouncing because it needs to be on the back of a vehicle
I mean, that's that's what a hay ride is a hay ride and not just any vehicle a tractor a truck or a tractor. Yeah
Okay, this is called riding lessons. No, that's got to be it. That's just a sex one
No, they're in hay
Again in hay is different than on a hay ride joe suspended. But yeah, no, they're just in a barn. Oh my god
That was full vagina right in my face
I was not expecting that it's uh
Oh, it's 130 never mind. Oh, okay. I thought it was way earlier than that for some reason. I was like, you know
What's the earliest you've watched porn?
I don't know when you wake up really
It's not I don't do that. That seems like I wouldn't chew gum before noon
like that seems like
That's true. That's that seems like an afternoon or evening type thing. I'm more inclined to watch porn
In the morning than I am chewing gum because I don't chew gum in the morning either
Because you brush your teeth. You don't need to come. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean I did chew gum this morning
That was the first analogy that I thought of for the afternoon gum is gum is an afternoon. It's a snack at least
A snack. Yeah, it's not like a morning thing. I don't know about it being a snack. I do I would say
I mean, I would imagine that it's like, you know
An afternoon thing
I don't know
Um, but there are people out there. Yeah, that's that's that's hay ride born for you folks
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um, yeah, so
I figured we uh, you know kind of end with
A thing that I was going to bring up before because we were talking about the hotel rooms. Yes, we were and
I didn't honestly put two and two together
Because because you dropped out of college. No
I didn't put two and two together uh with the square that was cut out of the rug. Yeah
Uh, you said it may be blood. I didn't even consider that I thought maybe a flood
I don't know wait. Hold on. So you thought a flood took out only a single square
no, I thought that maybe because
In my mother's house, we had to cut off square out of the floor because there was a a um leak
There was there was like a uh
A pipe there that we had to like clear or something. I remember. Yeah, I remember that
You know what I mean? So I thought maybe that was why and there was a flood
But you said blood definitely don't like that one of my least favorite up there would come
Not my come honestly
Oh, not your wait you you like her come not that I no, I just don't you'd rather be like it's a sense of like
Warmth when you're around your own come
No, I mean, I just don't I'm not
Go ahead. I
I'd rather look at how flustered he is. No, no, no. I'm trying to verbalize this
I would rather have someone else's blood on me than someone else's come on me is what I was trying to say
Oh, I would I mean, oh, that's really tough for a calm. That's really really tough. I would I guess yeah
I think I think I'd rather blood
I think I don't know man. I mean, I'd probably be very upset with either
Let's be honest and if you had to pick out of the the bottom four you're going piss
Yeah, we've we literally had this exact same conversation pee on me all day
Well, yeah, no, give me, you know, give me the morning to get myself together
P is sweet like bear girls is drinking it and stuff like that
Like if if you can drink pee like you're fine, but like you you'll have a problem drinking blood and come
I don't like getting blood on me. Yeah
I I don't think I've ever gotten anyone else's blood on me that I can remember
I've definitely gotten other people's blood on me. What the fuck what the fuck have you been up to?
Not that. Oh, here we go. When I was cracking heads on the football field. Fuck you. No
I just remember I just like don't like blood
And not that I'm not one of those people that like pass out. I just don't like it. I just think it's gross
Um
Also, you do this shit. No that when you cut your finger and you start bleeding you go
Yeah, I do do that. I do do that. I have a problem where I I pick
Particularly this area of my thumbs. I pick them. Yeah, your thumbs are a fucking tragic. Take it easy. Okay, they are
This one isn't that bad right now. This one not so great. No, this one is a little cut right here
Because you're barely gonna have thumbs when you're older. Uh, I mean, I think I'll still have thumbs joey
I think the sides of them will probably be raw like fucking monday night
But outside of that I do I am one of those people
But I'm also the type of person where like something will happen. I think I'm gonna bleed and I'll squeeze it
Just be like if you're gonna fucking bleed do it now. Yeah, I do that, too
You know, it's like do you do what you weak pussy. Yeah, did I do the same thing if you had a little cut on my arm?
I'm just like
You know most of the time doesn't bleed. No, I believe do you you're an easy bleeder
easy bleeder you ever have you ever bled like
from like your bunge
My dick. No, your butt. I meant to see oh my butt. No. Yeah, I've had blood in my stoop
So weird. I had this conversation literally yesterday. Oh, okay. Yeah. I was not with me for the record. No, no, no
I had this conversation yesterday
and
I was like, oh no, I've never like shit blooded my life. Oh, and they were like what?
Dude, I was like, yeah, no never. That was a there was a daily occurrence for me for a fucking like two and a half years
That was a good two years, huh? No
Let me tell you not a fun two years. That's never happened to me ever
Yeah, and you might not even know like because it's not like you look at first of all, you don't inspect all your shit
No, I don't like inspect you look at everything that you take
What do you mean? You look every time you you're done. You look at it
I don't like inspect it, but I see it, but I'll know if like there's blood in there
I mean when you're saying blood in there, you're thinking that it comes out red and that's not necessarily a case
Like black and what you would notice if your shit was black
That's no because like black
That's means there was bleeding in your high like high in your oh, thanks science
I'm just saying like personally with me like I for someone that has had to red or black
Red dude, like there was like you could you would look at it and say that's blood not like that's dark
Like I remember like red black
That happens to people when they drink apparently
I think Pete told me he's like, yeah, sometimes it looks like a murder scene
I was like, you know, that's literally never happened. Yeah, and I would need to go to a psych ward
Pete Pete's got some other things going on
I literally was just like, you know if that happened to me like I would assume that I'm dying tomorrow
It hasn't happened to me in a long time
Make that very clear, but like there was a point like and you might not necessarily realize it
I had to once give a stool sample and it was the worst day of my entire life
How do you give a stool sample? I'll tell you exactly how
The doctor sent me home with fucking cups
and was like
you need to
We need to test to see like what's going on like if there's confirm if there's blood or what anything
I'm like, all right. What do I do?
They gave me a cup and then they gave me this thing that looked like a fucking pale
And I was like, what is it? They go, oh, it goes over your your toilet seat
I was like, what do I do? And they're like
Shit in it. Yeah
and I'm like
And then what and they're like unscrew this lid and I unscrew the lid and on the underside of the lid there was a fucking spork
and I'm like
I'm like
What what do I do? And they're like you fucking scoop it onto the thing and you put it in the thing with liquid
And I'm like get the fuck out of here and they're like, yeah, and you keep it in your fridge
And it can't be older than 24 hours. I'm like fuck you and they're like no seriously
and
You know how like when someone says like oh, it smells like shit
That's when shit is going into a water water bro shit in the air is misery
You had to put a fork in your shit
And then put it in your fridge
Now one of the prouder days of my life. Yeah, uh, but it wasn't fun
We're all gonna have to fork our shit and like you I put it in a in a thing in a container
And then put it in like side three bags like one was like a ziplock
The next one was like a plastic bag and then the other one was like another fucking ziplock
Oh my god, dude
It was miserable and like you can see you could look at it and say like yo, there's blood there
And it looked it like it looked like a fucking
Looked like a twizzler
moving
The reason why I bring up blood and not shit, but shit just follows that follows us everywhere like our shadow
Uh, a new york woman
Apparently ordered a chair off of amazon and then she took a video and she put it on uh
Twitter her she tweeted she's like if I told you the leather chair I ordered from amazon was packaged with a blood collection tube
That is full. Would you believe me?
Um, and then she sent a video and it's literally and like when you get a blood test and they put those they give you those little tubes
Yeah, um
One was just in the box with this fucking chair. How does that happen?
I would burn that fucking chair and box to the ground, dude
Bro a tube of blood shows up from my house
I think that the mafia is like sending me a message bro. Did I ever tell you what happened to one of my neighbors?
Not blood because blood would be scary
She got someone that came to her house
And just left a package on the front step
She didn't order it nothing happened. She opened the package and it was like
15 pounds of butter
of sticks of butter, dude
And like like damn the Amish are sending a message. Oh, but like that's that's fucking creepy. You know what I mean?
Like you know there
Yeah, dude, it was weird
But like not blood
But like butter it's kind of creepy too. If anything that's more creepy because now i'm confused
Yeah, it's like what what message are you trying to send?
Are you threatening me?
You know how like the mob would be like send a cheese because you have a fucking rect
Like what what's the butter? You know what I mean? Like oh because i'm a fucking like a cow
Oh, maybe maybe because i'll tip him i'll tip him like a cow. We want to milk you
Oh
Milk them for what they're worth or that extortion
extortion
did it
uh, yeah, that's fucking strange is
is
Like what would be your thought process with getting a vial of blood in the mail
It would not go well
Dude, I throw out my own forks when I don't wash them for a few days. I know like oh my god so much bacteria
I just throw it out. Yep. Do you still do that?
I did it recently
It wasn't a fork. It was a mason jar. So you have told me
That you can't give me that 98% raise that I've asked for but you can 98% right, but you can just well because I only get 2%
Oh, okay, uh
But you just readily throw out your silverware
It's not it was a glass
How much wasn't silver? I haven't I haven't thrown out silverware in a very long time. Okay. Can I ask you a serious question?
But i'm throwing out cups
How many cups over the last year? Have you thrown out because they're dirty? Uh three
Okay
You do have these
One of if not all of these things you ready? Mm-hmm working hands. Yes sponges
Yeah soap for sure water
The ability to get that water slightly warm
Definitely. Okay. You know what I also have a dishwasher. Yeah. Yeah a good one
But it's just up here. Why it doesn't leave me. I don't know why
I can't I can't you the reason why this happened was because I
Didn't have any more
You know what I throw out all the time all the time towels protein shakers
Yeah, that makes sense. Those are kind of cheaply made and disposable. No, I throw them out when they're new
Like I will buy this is what i'm telling you right now when they've been worn off
My god, you're not doing yourself any favors here. I just want to make the reason why I throw out a glass, right?
So I haven't thrown out somewhere. I've been on top of this because I've been like, you know doing the dishes and stuff
but the problem is
with these shakers
that's where I get an issue because I
Usually when I I get home from the gym and then I just chug a fucking
Protein shake and I put it on the counter and I always tell myself
I'm gonna fill up with water and just like drink the water throughout the day and like whatever
And then I take a shower, right?
But then sometimes I take a shower and then I I'm getting dressed and I forget about it
And then there's protein like residue on this thing
And then it just doesn't get clean for a few days for whatever it is and then and then I'm in my head
I'm looking I'm like I can't I just it's disgusting. No, I'll tell you this roll them out
So the reason why the glass got happened is because I had to make a protein shake in a mason jar
Because I had no more clean shakers because they were in the dishwasher
And then that was just sitting in the fucking sink and then I was like, oh, I'm done
And the funny thing is sorry. No, I want to say none of this is funny
No, the thing is there was a bunch of other stuff in the sink with it. That was the same age as it
But I threw only that out. So it seems like the issue here is protein. No, it's me
Oh, no, we know that
But like it's only happening with things that you put protein in which is also a super
Because it it doesn't
Age well, it doesn't and it stinks. I I'm right there with you and it's closed, but I'd rather it be open
but
You have the tools to clean it make that stink and the smell and everything go away
The real issue is that I don't do the dishes consistently enough
Um, I mean, I'm not going to talk shit about that because like that that fucking makes sense
Like you you work like you're you're not like fucking you're busy
But also like I I definitely when I live in long island city
Horrible with the dishes horrible
I did I think I did the dishes at your long island city plays more than you did and that's not a fucking joke
That's not a joke. I was very bad there, but that was also like my first real apartment
And I was just like fucking I don't know but in this apartment like I do all the dishes and like it's fine
Everything's cool, but there are just some days where like or if like if I have like a busy day or something
Because I'm horrible with my calendar and I'll just say yes to everything and then I'll just try to make it work
and then I
get home
After like a long day or I'd like I go out after work and then I don't get home until like 10 o'clock
And I'm like, well, I'm not going to do the dishes now
Can't do them now and then if I go away for the weekend or something then I come home on Monday. Everything's getting tossed
Oh, everything's everything's burning it down wait until you have kids
Because I'll be like, all right
I'm going to do the dishes when the kids go to sleep the kids go to sleep and be like
I'll be too loud to do the dishes right now. I can't do them right now
I I consistently come up with new excuses to not do the dishes sometimes
I get a little backed up
Guess what I get to them eventually or beccatism. God bless her soul. Yeah, because I don't have the time or energy to do them
but
God bless her soul. God bless her soul because there are sometimes those dishes. I'm just like I can't do this right now
Yeah, but I've never I've always and I've had some stuff that like has been sitting there for too long where it's like
This is a containment issue. Like this is a hazard
But I don't I'm like, I don't care. I'll fucking clean it out
If I got a vial of blood
With a chair that chair is getting burnt. Yeah. Yeah, I'm throwing that out. I don't give a fart
Yeah, what like how cool that chair was. Oh mid-century
suede
Fucking like I care about sweet entry dude that if there's blood if there's a vial
But if there was like a little drop of it in the box, I'd be like, wow, that's weird cardboard box
Bro a vial that's evil
No, if there was a drop, I would argue that's much worse. No
Out bro blood a vial. It's raw. It's out. Yes, but it's dried probably bro a vial
It wasn't at one point. You know where I instantly go?
vampires
That's your concern cloning
cloning fucking
serial killer
Yeah
come on
You got to think about those things
If there's I have to think about vampires. Yes, you do
Especially if you got a vial of blood from a fucking you ordered a sweet chair and it comes with a vial of blood
Bro that came from a vampire
They're out there. They wouldn't just give away blood. They have to drink it
Yeah, but it was an accident probably and they're gonna be hunting it down because they're gonna be like I need that
I need that back. So I'm gonna have to go vampire some shit
I need to get a gun
You know you need a fucking you need to get a steak and some garlic and garlic
Who chose that that was such a stupid thing. I think that was just a way of just being like
I don't know. It was stupid. I got I'm tired. I'm hungry right now
I'm hungry too actually you want to on my way out. You want to get a pizza?
No, I don't want pizza. Okay
But I think we can wrap up here Frank. We're gonna find you. Uh, well, it's 4th of July. So fucking he y'all god bless america
What the hell was that? Yeah
Uh, I found verse 80 85 on twitter the frank alvarez on instagram. Go check out the patreon
We didn't bring it up during the episode, but patreon people were uh, well as a recording we're closing in on about 11 103
11 go I'm gonna keep going
1103 what?
11,300
We said we were gonna do something at 11,000, but things didn't work out. So guess what 12,000 is our next goal
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