The Basement Yard - #418 - Thinking About The Roman Empire Again...
Episode Date: October 2, 2023Those Romans were something... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome back to the basement yard.
We should leave it that in.
We should leave it like this.
We should leave it that in.
Yeah, I got it.
We can't now.
You know why?
You flustered me, bitch.
You know why we can't leave that in?
Why?
Because you just said the end word.
Stop with this.
You're going to convince people that's real.
I was like, what are you talking about?
Did you see that TikTok where it's like, what's girl in this guy?
Hey, welcome back to base me, guys.
It's a girl in this guy and a letter pops up and it's like, we're gonna say the same,
we're gonna say word, like a first word that comes to our mind until we get one that's correct.
And the first one is J and she's like, John and he's like jump and it's Ann and they both pause you know
What do you want to say?
Who's that welcome back glad to be back? Yeah, boys back in action just like loony tunes
I don't know about you, but I'm not a loony toony because I'm sitting out here and I got my boys
No, stop. How about no stop?
Let me rap.
I don't know what you're doing.
Let me rap.
I was gonna rap.
I was gonna do this.
I don't like.
Well, let me rap.
I was gonna rap.
I was gonna spit a quick 16.
That's even worse.
Don't say that either.
Why?
I don't know.
Doesn't sound good.
Why?
Because I'm not gonna spit on a 16-year-old.
I'm gonna spit a 16.
Hey, I didn't think that you were gonna do that
Okay, cuz that's I leave rhymes with 16
Fisting
Fisting I would think so right?
Fisting yeah, yeah, but like would you fist a lot be serious be serious be serious Frank be serious
Stop stop stop pointing at me. No problem. I don't know maybe
Come on. I don't know but it's not something that you would like to die like all my birthday
I'm trying to I don't want to speak about the mother of my children on YouTube like that pretend pretend that you're not
Pretend I'm not married
Okay, um would you fit no, but it but like see I don't like doing this either because now you know
I don't want to think about life. I don't want to think about a life without my wife
Love when you do this do what?
I don't want to think about a life without my wife
I want to do what I like when you say like asking you to do that. I know you're not no Joey
It listen, I guess if the circumstances called for it a fisting. I guess so of course you want to you want to
Someone who wants to be what about you fucking fist mess. I guess so. Of course you want to, you want to,
someone who wants to be fisted.
What about you?
Fucking fisted.
I would fist master general.
What do you, yeah?
I've never fisted anybody.
I come to you and I'm like, please.
Not you.
I'm not, I'm not saying me,
but I come to you for them.
I'm their advocate.
Oh, there's a middleman.
I'm just like, you're like, well, yeah,
there always always, remember,
in like high school, it always be like,
yo, like my home board.
Things you're hot. Yeah, but it always be like, yo, my homeboy,
things are your heart.
Yeah, but it's not like, hey, my homeboy wants you to,
know if he wants to, you get fisted.
You never know.
Oh, I mean, it took forever.
It's like, yeah, you see my homegirl over there?
She wants to get fit, she loves your hands.
Make a fist for me real quick.
She wants a closed fist.
And she wants a closed fist thing.
I guess, I mean, listen.
Yeah, go for it.
It goes down. I heard that you recently for other people's lives. guess, I mean, listen. Yeah, go for it. It goes down.
I heard that you recently, for other people's lives.
No, I'm not, I'm not the new assistant.
I'm not the new assistant anymore.
Other people's lives, you spoke to someone
that does like mass forges.
Did we?
Maybe the episode's not out, or maybe it won't come out.
Maybe, I don't know.
Either way, that's something that you have to do
once in your life.
What?
You have to go to an orgy. No, I don't. Why not? I think of the smell. Oh, yeah. Maybe it something that you have to do once in your life. What you have to go to an orgy. No, I don't why not I think of the smell
Yeah, maybe it's like the outdoors come with a for breeze. Oh an outdoor one
But then you got to worry about the elements like what if it's raining?
You pick a debt Frankie. We have we can predict the weather. Oh Joey
How disappointed would everyone be if they're like ah tomorrow?
You know, I'm assuming this a rand delay. I'm assuming this prepping ball you pick a day and like the autumn not the autumn
Yeah, a lot of rain in the autumn is there spring
How did that enjoy the right April showers? There's all that they have a whole month dedicated to the rain
Yeah, I do like when it rains and it's sunny out so you want to know something funny
Someone found on a previous episode
of the Basement Yard podcast,
but you could find anywhere.
Um, I enjoked about how I had previously made a stupid tweet
in like 2012 or something and someone found it.
What tweet?
It was a tweet where I, I mean,
it shouldn't take me very long to pull up,
so bear with me, but I had said I something stupid to the like
Was it does it have anything to do with like
Sun showers because that's what I was talking about it. This has nothing to do with that. I may scream
No, I don't think it has anything to do with such a why did you think of this?
What do you mean? Why did I think of this? Why did it pop into your head? Well, I was talking we were talking
I'm saying we were talking in another episode about it and you just brought up the word rain Joey
So I'm talking rain, too
You brought up rain. You brought up rain. You brought the rain up. You said what are the rains on your orgy day?
I'm too busy looking for this Joey. You're probably not gonna find them. I'm probably not now that I think about it
but it was something along the lines of like like
Mmm hot hot rain. Yes, please sexy or some shit like
Hot rain is sexy Joey. What's hot rain? I thought in 2012 that if I tweeted something was sexy someone would find me sexy
Is that is that was a thought process maybe I was it was that was like 20 years old 19 20 years old that's old
It was it was that was nine 20 years old 19 20 years old. That's old
That you're not seven Frank you're 20 years old. Oh Joey You're gonna tell me you still think the exact same way you did when you were 20 guess what watch this?
No, you don't I know I don't but I know and I don't no don't I don't no no no no no what you don't know what I know I know thanks hump
What you say hump you go
I know thanks hump
What you say? Also never humped anybody in my life. You've had sex, but that's not humping. Yes, you hump Joey
That's thrusting. Humping is humping is like Joey
That's a heart dude. Humping is like different. Rusting is just no clothes humping with clothes. You never dry humped
I don't think Joey. I don't know you're lying little sack of dirt
I don't think Joey. I don't know you're lying little sack of dirt
I don't know if I've dry humped Joey. I've like done you're gonna tell me you've not been in like a like a like a
Pre-sex make-out and you just like yes, yes, yeah, there you go Yeah, I know but that's not that's not dry-humping. Yes, it is no that's just making out with movement
Yeah, but like you get like in the position dry Humping is like a is like we're Humping
Like yes, yes purposefully. I'm just Humping because I'm like you're
Humping your your
Making out makes me move make out Joey make out it's a hump dude. No Humping is you're thinking like you're a fucking little rodent
You're like like no you have you have humed before yeah, but like no I have it. Yes. I don't believe I think those are different Joey
You are incorrect here. You have definitely tried. Oh, no. No. Yes, you have humping is like like humping
You're gonna tell me you've never been laying down
Wearing full clothes making out with someone and you're doing like humping
Fools are carrying full clothes, making out with someone and you're doing like humping. No.
Not like you're putting them in a sex position and you're both closed and you're like,
this is a sweet if I lost my clothes here.
No, no, I, I want to picture dry humping.
I think of, what's the whole lot to that?
I'll get to that.
Why the scissors?
Because I, why the scissors?
I think of dry humping.
I'm gonna fuck it, I'm gonna fuck it, I'm gonna fucking explain! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Lesbian stuff. We can't, first, you know, we're not allowed to take that. Where is it stopped?
You know, have a scissoring.
They had a rough go of it.
Yeah.
Give them scissoring and the WMBA.
And softball.
And softball.
And softball.
And softball.
They will give them that.
They have that.
They're happy.
Right.
Those are good stuff.
We'll share flannels though.
We will share flannels.
We will share them, we will, and you'll like it.
Okay?
Also, we will share shaving designs
in the side of your head too.
If anything, we did it first.
So you're sharing, we're letting you.
You're welcome.
Right, yeah.
Don't make us take it back.
And chain wallets.
We will.
Don't make us take back chain Wallace
Don't you do they got uncool for us a little bit you can have him for now
But the minute we want them back. It's ours again. All right. What were you talking about though?
Dry humping dry humping but hey, I do think that it's like a dry humping is more of like it
It's like purposeful like I'm I'm I'm I'm humpin right now
No, I think you're I'm gonna set the scene for you close your eyes
You're laying down on your back on your bed. Okay. Yeah
You're for some reason you still have a twin size bed. It doesn't make any sense. I don't I
You're laying on your back my turn. Let me talk and someone is on top of you straddle you're both wearing jeans and
Making out for jeans. Yeah, some good leave eyes, you know, classic cut, don't maybe even boot cut.
Choose.
No, you kicked your shoes off.
She's in the middle of taking her off, all right.
She's like, you're making out and she's like doing the thing where she you're making
out and reaching back.
She's reaching back what? And pulling her boots off. Oh, oh, okay. Close your eyes. Why are they open?
I was why are they open because I had to supervise what you were saying. I said you didn't have to
supervise anything with your eyes close your eyes. Supervised. Supervised. Supervised. Supervised.
Realized. Realized. Realized. Yeah. Supervised supervised realize realize realize real
All right, and you're making out and there's this there's don't look no don't there's this there's wave movements going
They're kind of Humpty though you're time to close my eyes and then you're doing things and I can you know
There's this don't look Joey Jesus Christ. Don't I'm just explaining it. There's this right here stop saying this because I can't see
Stupid bitch
Closing them go ahead
So there's like gyrating
Hips and this this right here Frankie if you say this one more time
I'm going to open my eyes and glue them open. I'm never starting them again
So stop saying this describe it to me, okay? You're not adding a little bit to the party
Yes, but that's not hump. Yes, it is Joey. It's humping because if your clothes were off and pee and beam were bowed there
There'd be subs
Fod's of that
All right, whatever.
Just admit you dry hump.
Maybe.
It's not uncool to dry hump, dude.
It's pretty sick.
Whatever, dude.
I don't know.
I just want to go home.
Well, that's like the hand job thing.
Hand jobs are for high school.
Dry, never gotten a hand job.
You never gotten like a dedicated like this is just for hand job? Never. All never gotten like a dedicated, like this is just for a hand job?
Never.
All right.
Well, see, but this is the same thing.
This is what I mean.
Like obviously, like it's been touched.
The thing's been touched.
You might wanna try the hand job thing.
Why, everything else is way cooler.
I mean, yeah, but like, this is something to do.
Knock it off your bucket list, you know?
By the end of your days, you need to get one.
Sure.
Just dedicated, just for you hand job.
I'm sure it'll be like, you know, when I have a wife
and like, I'm hiding in a room and she's got one eye on the kids
and she's like, you fucking here.
You got real, you got, you got, you got,
you got it open and girthy on that, Joey.
Give yourself some real list.
She's, yeah, here.
Slap it in.
You think she's trying to jerk you off and she's trying to tell you to get the fuck out of here? She's a good at it, good at list. Yeah, slap it in there. You think she's trying to jerk you off
and try to tell you to get the fuck out of here?
She's a good idea.
Yeah.
I think you've probably been a notorious dry hump in your life.
No one's notorious for dry-humping.
Dude, you haven't had some just some hard dry make-outs.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's dry-humping. There's hump in in there
Give into the hump. There's nothing wrong with it. Just look at me. Just you've humped
It's a great groping than it is humping. Well, groping is a bad. It's a negative connotation to it Joey
Yeah, because yeah, if you grow up without
Consent when you hear people grooping or groped. You could grop with consent, groping.
Like if I'm grabbing your tip, I'm groping you.
I think that's not a grop just,
it doesn't sound right, I don't like it.
To you maybe.
To, to, to, to, to, to, to,
Yeah, I'm not saying I groped a waitress.
I'm saying a person that I'm with.
Very specifically.
If that's who waitresses get groped all the time.
You move with that example.
Artenders.
I think it's like people on like the train
and the bus and stuff like that.
That's true, that's true.
Big grubbing problem out there.
What kind of a big freak do you need to be?
Do you just be like,
grab and ask?
Also, what do you get from that?
They get something, those fucking freaks.
Yeah, they get something from anything.
It's crazy.
It should murder them.
I have a question.
I started cutting off hands though for sure.
Dude, whatever that country was, I ran one of those countries did that.
They had it right.
They were cutting hands off?
Yeah, they were also cutting heads off.
I would hands is what I would fingers.
I'm saying, like you steal, they were like, oh, you steal from me, I take your hand.
Homorabi.
That's right, his code.
I think that was from Egypt though, so either way.
But yeah, I agree. Hey hey serial groper is out there you get caught you lose
If you lose a finger every time. I don't know how much of our audiences serial groper's hopefully none of them
I agree because we don't like that. Yeah, unless it's with consent then we're big fans of all about it all about it
Let me tell you grab and grab it. I have a question for you as this is something that has gone across the internet
as of late. How often do you think about the Roman Empire? I've seen this shit all over
TikTok but I never think about this. I think it's bullshit. I think everyone's like oh like they
just want to be a part of something and they're like, oh the Roman Empire see my boyfriend's also quirky you guys suck
Well, thanks about the Roman Empire. I agree. I think this is like boys just trying to have like a boy thing
I think about the Roman Empire all the time twice a week
That's what I would be like all right. You know what name three dictators. Go ahead. Give me three leaders and you can't be Caesar
Give me another two. Give me another three. Give me two. They can't be Caesar give me another two give me another three give me two
They can't we're talking about a specific empire Frank the Roman Empire
That's what I'm saying like there were different dictators. I don't even know that I don't even know like when people say
How many times you think about it?
Pro why don't we don't think about anything historical unless?
I'm
taking a test.
And that doesn't happen often.
No, it doesn't happen.
I would say ever really.
In the last 10 years, it hasn't had that at all.
Even longer.
Um.
Yeah.
I don't get why this was like a thing.
Like, why, like, boys need to consider, like,
try to be cooler by thinking like, oh, we think of the Roman Empire.
No, we don't. No, we do not.
No.
We do not.
If I'm thinking of history at all, and I hate the Roman Empire,
it's World War II.
I think about that.
That shit is pretty cool.
World War II way more than I think about the Roman Empire.
Dude, what were they doing back in the Roman Empire?
You didn't care.
Well, they had stupid haircuts.
And they're fucking, their helmets had feathers on.
Oh, sweet.
You know how cool the Roman Empire was?
They were brought down by Christianity way to go.
Stupid.
They did have pretty cool hats. The ones that looked like brooms.
I hate them.
Oh, I thought that was kind of cool.
I did like their chest plates that looked like they were ripped.
They were shredded.
Yeah, but I didn't like that though.
They were just fat Romans.
No, they were pretty shredded a lot of them.
Mmm.
Because they couldn't eat.
Those are the Greeks.
The Greeks, though. I don't think of that empire either.
Well, no, I just remember the movie.
They were ripped up in that movie.
They're all ripped up in all those movies, but...
It's such a stupid...
Not enough fetched soldiers in movies.
No representation.
Well, because back then, people that were fat were of high power.
That's true, Joey.
Well, look at us talking about the Roman Empire.
It's two boys.
Two boys.
The first time I've done it, and that's way too far away
for me to tap you up.
But yeah, no.
The Roman Empire thing, it's just a fad on TikTok.
Everyone's to be a part of it, and they want to do well.
What do you think is going to come out from this?
Because it always, no, no.
Like, what is the equivalent for girls?
What do girls think of?
I don't know.
Why would the hell would you ask me?
I don't know.
I'm not a good.
Yeah, neither am I Joey.
But guess what?
How many times has that stopped us
from pontificating the stuff in the past?
Get that out of your fucking vocabulary?
I don't know.
I don't know.
What do they think about?
So a voice thing with the Roman Empire. What do girls think of it?
The Roman Empire sucks. If that had said World War II, we wouldn't even have
be having this conversation.
Salem Witch Trials. That's...
That's... How is that the similar to...
I don't know what a girl's think of.
I don't know, dude. Do you think they think of like witches being burned to the
stake for reading? Maybe. I don't know. I mean...
Oh, that bitch can read. Burner.
And she can't read either also with a burner useless burner
What would you all right serious question if I were to ask Joey at the age of 15 what girls were thinking what would you say?
I don't my god, I knew exactly what this was gonna be Joey's going on this high horse. I don't know like fucking like Susan B Anthony and like just fucking Susan
Joe you would have said something stupid
You know I don't get it. I don't even know what Susie did. I know she was on a coin. Joe. She was on a coin
I don't know either
I'll be honest
I'll be honest. I don't know either. I feel like I should know that. We
should probably should and we should tell the people that watch this show. Yeah. Susan
Be Anthony for those who don't know. Obviously we do. We're just you know. We want to make sure you guys
knew before we told you. She's a social, social, social, or a former woman's rights. Of course. Activists in the early 19th and the
women's suffrage. Yeah, so see I told you we know.
Did you do you support women's suffrage? Wow, well I don't want it. Huh? What is like
suffrage sounds like suffering? Right. Do you support women's suffrage? That seems like a trick question and I don't know.
But is it? I support the onset of, you don't know what suffrage is.
You don't know what suffrage is.
I know suffragette city, good song by David Bowie.
Is that gonna help you here?
He's dead.
Correct.
Isn't that sad?
Are you trying to get me off the question? Women's
suffrage. Yeah, yeah, your name, I guess it's I guess the movement to what
movement the movement to move in the right direction that that movement the
the the the the right direction is different for some people for all. Yes. I am a feminist. Okay. So how do you feel about women's
suffrage, Frank? I feel like it was an important part of our history and we have a lot of work
left to do. With that? Yeah. With women's suffrage. You feel like we still haven't gotten
to the point where we're not there yet. We're not there yet. We're not. We're not. And
you don't. Well, the women's suffrage movement
was the start of moving in the direction
that might kind of benefit women the most.
And that's where I want to be.
So you support women's suffrage.
Is what you're saying?
I don't, because that.
You don't support women.
Well, we know that you don't know what it means,
but it sounds like you don't support it or you do support I'm not sure though.
How can I support something that I fully understand?
Right.
No, but I know what it is.
It's hard to understand.
I'm whether you support it or not.
Joey, I'm a silent partner.
Yeah.
Oh, you're a silent partner in supporting?
I am here to link arms with my sisters and arms and be down with the movement.
And I'm down with them.
I'm here for them.
Put down meaning you want to put the movement down?
No, no, I want to.
Do you support the sufferers or not?
I can't tell.
It sounds like you said yes and then you said no
and I'm not sure.
And I get that it's probably very hard to understand.
Yeah.
Because it is complicated, right?
I think when you... Is it a...
Would you say it's a gray area?
Susan B. Anthony.
Forget about her.
S-
Gray area.
Is it a gray area here?
No.
Women's office.
So it's a black and white thing.
Well, stop that.
I don't want that.
Ha!
Yeah.
Susan B. Anthony.
Sylvia Plath.
What are we doing here?
Helen Keller. Helen Keller. Sylvia Platt, what are we doing here?
Helen Keller.
Helen Keller.
Amelia Earhart.
Amelia, how are these people all notable women that I'm supporting here, Joey?
And I will support Amelia Earhart?
Yes, I do.
Okay.
People didn't think she could do it.
And she did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
She did it.
Oh, God.
You know, I just found out, we're going to get back to this, by the way.
But you know, I just found out what happened.
You hit your head on the wall.
Yeah, you did.
Yeah, you did.
I just found out what may have happened to Amelia Earhart.
I think she had on her way back or something like that. She had gone down, right?
Yeah, Frank, but who cares?
Oh, I'm saying, no, I'm saying like, why can't you, Joey? I do.
Listen, yeah, because you don't, you with the suffrage again.
You want suffrage. What happened to Amelia Earhart, Joey?
Women's suffrage is women's rights to vote by the way.
I agree with it.
You said it with, you said no.
No, because I said, and then you said it was complicated.
I know.
It's just women's rights to vote in the right way.
I agree with it.
I obviously, Joey.
Okay, yeah, it's obvious now.
Amelia Earhart, so, this is a theory about what happened to her.
Because the Bermuda triangle or whatever. Isn't that below us though? So, this is a theory about what happened to her.
Cause the Bermuda triangle or whatever that is.
Isn't that below us though?
To who?
The Bermuda triangle below us?
Yeah.
What does that mean?
Like under like, like,
it's more southern than where she was gonna be.
Right?
I don't know.
I don't even know where she went down.
She was flying across the Atlantic.
Yes, but like, from here to like fucking like London.
What do you think she was going to Cape Town?
Well, they think what happened, there was a theory because when I was in Portugal and you're
like looking out, sometimes the the of course had to bring up Portugal. So when you're looking out,
the sky sort of blends with the water
So you don't know where the fucking where you are and some people just hit the fucking water
So before the technology of knowing like how high you are off the ground
With fucking a million air heart only had was like goggles back then and they were like really dumb looking goggles. Yeah
Like Snoopy would wear those goggles.
Yeah.
And they think that that's why.
It's possible because she didn't know where the fuck
the thing was, because when I took a plane to Aesor,
it was such a small island and when we were coming down,
I didn't, I was looking at the water
and I didn't realize how low we were until I saw a boat and it was way bigger than I thought it was
So I would have crashed that motherfucker. You always like to sneak in little things into the episodes almost every single episode
And then your new thing now is gonna be just you're up Joe really talk about oh, we're also have you been Joey
When we went to the super small island and we got a chartered plane for that we
We had to really like shell out some real hard cash for it
Did I tell you that I got some cases of wine brought back for me? It was expensive first of all the flight was like 80 bucks
Portugal Joey 80 bucks Portugal their fucking currency is worth more than ours
Wow, so it was a lot of money then.
That's the Euro.
Yeah. The Euro was like 10 times the one.
So that was like 10 times.
That's what you said.
Are you even alive?
That's what you said, Joey.
Whatever. I don't even know what we're talking about.
I mean, this Roman Empire thing.
I don't understand shit.
Don't, it is a lie.
Like, girls have gone up to their boyfriends.
Like, do you think about the Roman Empire? And it's like, yeah, quite frequently. And it's like, a lie. Let's be like girls have gone up to their boyfriends Like do you think about the Roman Empire is like yeah quite frequently and it's like no they fucking don't because your boyfriends
Are also on tiktok and they're like what?
Yeah, yeah, I'm a dude. They just want to make themselves more. Oh, oh you're quirky dude
Bro, you're just like you're dude man. Boys are mysterious. Guess what?
We're not we're really not we're pretty pretty simple. Anyway, we have some responses for today.
The first one being a Squarespace.
I don't know why I did that.
Squarespace is where you can go to make your website, okay?
I've got another single.
I've been on other platforms where you think it help you create a website.
Takes forever.
Horrible.
Hey, them.
Frankie, I swear to God, if that phone goes off, I am going to have a connection. But Squarespace is amazing.
You can build your website on there.
You can also use some of their tools.
So you can track where traffic is coming from.
Help you optimize your business, your website,
and you can use your website for many things.
If you have a product, you have an e-commerce business,
or you make some sort of content,
or whatever, you can create some sort of landing page.
You can do so with Squarespace. And it is the best whatever, you can create some sort of landing page. You can do so with Squarespace,
and it is the best one,
because you can create these nice websites
with their beautiful templates,
which is my favorite part about their website,
because it gives you a huge jump start on the competition.
You can launch your site.
It wouldn't take too much time
to get all your information on there,
and it'll look very nice
and people would be very impressed
that you do it yourself.
But you can go to squarespace.com slash basement for a free trial. And when you're
ready to launch, use the offer code basement to save 10% off of your first purchase of a website
or a domain. Okay, so go over to squarespace.com slash basement right now. And when you're ready
to launch, use that offer code basement for 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.
Okay, do it. And next year we have Hello Fresh, Hello Fresh. You know
them, you'll love them. You get farm fresh ingredients. Pre-portioned, they show up to your doorstep,
which is very nice because everything's pre-portioned down to salt and pepper. They come a little
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for 10 weeks and you're like Jesus these bananas are growing
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but they have so many in-season ingredients like I said
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You can make stuff and also the fall is coming up so you can make like an apple cider cake with caramel sauce
Which holy hell that sounds amazing, honestly
Bbq pulled pork nachos, mini pumpkin cheesecake.
If it's a cheesecake, I'm making it and eating a thousand of them.
So they have a bunch of different menus that you can choose from.
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recipe, you make it yourself.
It's beautiful.
And it's also your saving money.
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get on it folks. It's beautiful. You know what else you can get on? Hop on up baby
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What? Oh, what? What did I do wrong this time? You rubbed of a
jyna. That's what you did. Sweet, rad. Patreon.com slides to the basement.
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Go to patreon.com slides to the basement.
Listen, we thank you guys every single week, every single time we talk to you
because we're continuing to break records.
We broke 26. We want to get over to 27.
And then 29 and 30.
And then who knows, the sky is the limit.
Thank you guys for getting us there. We really appreciate it. We're working on some stuff that is going to be given to you as big old faddle
thank yous for getting our Patreon account over into the top 10 in the world. You know that in the
whole wide world. So go check it out at patreon.com slash the basement yard. You sign up for that
first tier. You get these weekly episodes one week in advance. You get to hear about all this nonsense,
all the goodies, all the things that you can watch
and go, hey, maybe that'll be a clip
or maybe not one week before everybody else.
And then that second tier, mm, mm, mm, mm.
That's where you get those goodies.
That's where you get them.
You get the good, sweet, fat, sloppy,
Frankie, exclusive episodes every single Friday morning.
That means you can start and end your week with
these two lovable loops.
Check it out right now, patreon.com.sixlebasementary.com.
Thank you.
We look forward to it if you're gonna come on over
and party with us and hang out.
patreon.com.com slash basement.
These are getting more, these are getting more hated that.
More based.
Hold on, hold on.
More what?
Based?
Did I get it right?
Please stop using that word.
Did I get it right?
I don't know.
Come on.
You're asking the wrong girl.
Out of pocket.
Frankie, please.
Is that, is that it?
Nope, nope, cap.
God, don't like that one, huh my god. Don't like that one, huh?
Nope.
Don't like that one.
Like that, like that, like that, like that, like that one.
Like that.
What's that?
What's that?
No, come on.
Also, you heard someone say these are friendship necklaces?
Oh!
There's other people that have them though, so that doesn't make me feel very happy.
All right, yeah.
Yeah, I don't like that.
I've never taken mine off.
Do you? I'm not ready for you to say you. Yeah, I never take mine off. Do you?
I'm not ready for you to say I just started putting it back on
What happened in our relationship? It's not because of you. Why is it? Why is what why have you just started putting it back on? Oh, I don't know. I like let's get let's get friendship pinky rings. Let's get friendship rings promise rings to each other
What's the promise will always be friends?
Will always be best friends and we were my past my promise ring. What's the promise? We'll always be friends. We'll always be best friends.
And we wear my- as my promise ring. This is my promise ring with Joey. Yeah. That'd be cool.
Yeah, I'm sure your wife would be like, what? Yeah, she should be like, uh-huh. Why is it on the same
hand as your wedding ring? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, why did you move the wedding ring to a different
finger? Why is your wedding ring on the middle finger now? How you feel about getting rings?
Rings? Yeah. I, you know, it's funny. I don't really like things in between my hands. Okay.
But I just started wearing rings. Oh, where are they? I don't wear them like... Why not? Because I'm
not going to wear them daily. I'm not a daily. I'll tell you, I just got done with my rewatch
the sopranos a couple maybe like two weeks ago.
Do you wanna go pinky ring, don't you?
I definitely wanna go more rings.
But the reason it really spawned,
like it spawned the idea for me is I was eating a sandwich.
And I noticed I keep my like,
wait, how do you eat a sandwich?
Like this.
Why, which hands are touching it? Mostly these.
And the knees are there for like kind of like lovable like,
you know, emotional support.
And then knees are just kind of in the back.
Your pinky's got the lookouts.
Yeah, they're watching,
makes you know what's coming to fuck with my sandwich.
Yeah, okay.
And like if I had rings on these pinkies while I'm eating it,
it would just feel so sick.
You want to start wearing rings because you think it'll look cool when you eat something.
I do.
That's so random.
Is it random though?
Feels like it.
I also remember those big ass, I wouldn't get a big giant fat ring like Steve.
Yeah, I mean he's wearing a Captain America shield on his head.
Bro, this dude had a fucking, like, and I also don't wanna get those rings that are like double finger rings,
you know what I'm saying?
Oh, it says like, wham.
Yo, you know, like badass or some shit.
Yeah.
I just want like a good like ring right here.
Do you want it to be like flashy?
Um, a little bit flashy.
A little bit, a little, not like super flashy.
What color?
I would say I'd go gold.
Nice.
I need one gold ring.
Yeah. And then on the other hand, I could say I'd go gold. Nice. I need one gold ring. Yeah
And then on the other hand I could do maybe like a platinum or something. Would you wear a thumb ring?
That's a little no my thumbs are two. That's a giant ass ring. Look at how big my thumbs are Joey
Thumbs are weird. How do you look at thumbs dude? Yeah, what's the proper way? Do you remember back in the day was?
Yes, yes, I thank God bro
Back in the day, you know check your nails and if you check them like this everyone's like you're oh no
If you check them like this either way, they'd say you were gay. Oh, yeah, it was like check your nails
And you'd be like what dude that's gay and then you like check their nails that way like oh I mean like this and they're like oh that's
Too it's gay too and they'd be like what's the proper way and they'd be like oh
Oh like this yeah no so one did that to me at 48-she park once and I remember I was so like they did that in front of like a bunch of people
And I walked away. I was like not fucking gay. I can't believe that. I'm not gay. I was like check your nails
You go oh they go yeah
I remember that quite vividly. Yeah, I think we can I think we could pull off some rings
You should be.
Should we get all fingers?
Too many.
Too many, dude.
Dude, wait a minute.
Too, too, too many.
Probably.
Let's get, listen, follow me here.
I'm fine.
I know you're big into, like, jewelry.
I'm not.
What?
Go to the jeweler.
Get customized friendship rings.
Already I'm out.
Come on, dude.
I can't do that.
And we can get like like we can get like a
No one's gonna think that's a friendship. No, why they're gonna think we're sleeping with each other
Yeah inside of each other. Yeah, well, I don't think so. Yeah, we can get like the friendship stones like whatever one is like
Like you know how I'll be like oh Opal means like fucking like the life of water and shit like that
We can get one that like signifies friendship
They're no do you are you? do you realize what those do signify?
They're like birthstones, Frank.
I know, birthstones mean different things though, Joe.
So you want to get my birthstone on yours?
No, I'm saying.
I was going to say at that point,
you might as well have sex with each other.
What stone signifies friendship?
I wrote Stein and signified and friendship.
So I think it'll figure itself out.
Seven best crystals for friendship.
Okay.
Okay, no, no.
You ready?
No, we're talking about crystals now.
Yeah.
You wanna be crystal girls?
I don't.
But for us, I will.
Paradot also shares the name of the Stone of Friendship, meaning that it positively
made for moments that you want to connect and celebrate with your closest companions.
Dude, Parodot, come on!
That sounds like a Pokemon's name.
It's yellow.
Hell, that one looks like piss.
It does.
How fitting for us though, the piss boys.
Just two boys.
How are we the piss boys?
I pee in the car, you pee your pants. I we the piss boys? I peed in the car you pee your pants
I don't pee my pants you peed in the sink. What was that story you were drunk?
Pied in a seat threw up in the sink. Whatever. We're piss boys together. We're not piss boys. You just made that up. I don't think so
I know so no, I don't like I don't like how you're trying to like gaslight me here. No, I'm not gonna do that
I found something else. I wanted to show you
Fuck was that it was an anonymous redditor
talking about how they wipe and they wipe they wipe and I wanted to get
Your idea on on how you wipe your asshole
Oh, I've yeah, okay, So the anonymous redditor had said,
I'm 23, ever since I started wiping myself
around seven or eight, and in here,
it says way too late, I know.
Yeah, at least you know, that's pretty late, dude.
How old is Miles?
Hey, oh my God.
Dude, he's been wiping for a couple of years,
and I was in like four or five years.
Yeah, yeah, it's a kid to wipe a machine.
I used to wipe by using toilet paper and sometimes wet wipes all the way inside my anus until the toilet paper was absolutely,
had absolutely no stains on it. Wait, wait, wait. He said he would put the whole toilet paper in
there. In his asshole. He would shove the whole thing in his ass. The whole thing. Sometimes
there was even blood and I thought, oh, it's just a fisher or a hemorrhoid Yeah, kidding. It's a fisher. Yeah, you're ripping open the hole, baby. That is that's too much. That's too much in there, dude
That's too much in there. It is you're you got to be a surface level wiper
You can't go you you start digging in the cave. Yeah, you're gonna find some stalactites
Yeah, you're gonna find some ruby gems don't want though. Don't dare. That's my daughter's name. Don't you dare quaint her to poop?
I was thinking the blood.
Oh, all right, yeah, that's fine.
But don't ever talk about my daughter and poop.
Okay.
I'm a weird request.
Don't you ever talk about my daughter and poop?
Have you ever wiped that deep?
Into my hole.
Mm-hmm.
No, why would I need to do that?
I don't know.
I mean, some people, like, have you ever had like a piece in there that you were like, this isn't coming out?
Let me help it out.
You know, dude, oh my god, you know what?
I actually happened to me recently.
Oh no.
Let me get my bottle of water so I can do a spit take.
You're not going to do a spit take because you don't like this type of shit.
I won't. Go ahead.
I think I was on an airplane.
BOOM! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and then like I wasn't looking and I just kind of like whatever because I was
pretty no no specify specify what that means like whatever like you're done with
it what do you mean I just kind of like whatever I like through the toilet paper
in the thing gotcha in the pen in the pale in the toilet and then I got up and I
flush I washed my hands and I was about to walk out.
And I was like, something I'm feeling right.
It's like, yeah, something's off.
Something's off.
I'm like a full piece of toilet paper
between my cheeks.
In your ass, only in my ass.
Just in my ass hole.
But between my cheeks, my ass had sandwiched.
Well, if you have a particularly sweaty ass,
you can, you know, the moisture.
It wasn't.
It was just, I don't, I guess I was wiping and like it must have like like the toilet paper
Must have like ripped at a certain point and like I threw a piece in there and then the other
The other
And I was like can you imagine I'd be sitting on this the rest of this flight and then walking through an airport with a full piece of
toilet paper between my that's a lot that's a lot Joey That's that's a lot, that's a lot, Joey.
That's a whole lot right there.
Yeah, it was very weird.
I always check my feet when I leave the bathroom too,
because I was like, imagine walking out of the bathroom.
Yeah, it happens in movies all the time.
We're like, they walk out and there's a giant piece of like,
a string of toilet paper on the bottom of their shoe.
And what is that even insinuated?
Oh, you did shit?
What do you think I was doing in the bathroom, Sally?
Like, come on.
Pizzings?
Yeah. Pizzings for fucking... P fucking pizzas for losers. Yeah for bitches. Joe goes in there pisses out his butt
That I that's that IBS. No, you do have it. You like to ignore it. No, I don't one day. Nope
I just that seemed like are you a are you a full guy or you know? It's funny a crumple boy. I used to be a crumpler and I started folding. Oh
dumb
What's this? That's dumb
What's dumb the folding who do you think you are in there a fucking made?
Well, like what you're doing is as sin as it is, you don't need to try to fucking wrap it. Sitting is not as sin, bro. You've done in bathrooms and you fart a lot.
First of all, you're talking about me, you're king shit.
You don't know that!
Dude, dude. No, you don't.
Every time I am here, you talk about pooping.
That's not true. Every time you be like, oh, I have a shum.
And I'm like, that's not true.
Tell me your name. I have a shum. And I'm like, that's not true. Tell me in eight.
I swear on the Bible.
Give me a Bible.
It's where on the Bible.
Oh, okay. The Bible.
You know, liar. He didn't believe in the Bible.
That's why he won't, he'll swear on it.
He don't believe in the Bible.
You don't believe in the Bible.
You don't believe in the Bible.
That's an excuse.
Good book.
Someone left, came recently and left it on our doorstep.
What?
Yeah.
That would freak me out.
Are we going to get an extra shot?
It freaked me out a little bit and I said to the back, I was like, what do we do?
It's just like, oh, I can't throw it away.
I'm like, hmm, why?
Oh my god, I didn't even tell you this story.
Did you throw it away?
No, I don't know where it is, honestly.
I didn't throw it away.
I can throw it in Pete on it.
If I threw it away, oh, I didn't pee on it.
You're the pee-pee boy.
No, you pee in your own yard.
I forgot to tell you this story.
So Becca, please make this a clip
because it's fucking hysterical.
Okay.
Becca likes to go like thrift stores.
She fucking broke this girl.
It's like heroin, Ty.
Girls love buying dead people.
Oh my god, yeah.
Bro, if you go and find a shirt from 1998,
you're fucking, you hit the jackpot.
But she went a couple of weeks ago.
She had like a day with her sisters and her friends
and her mom and they went to this like giant thrift store.
And I know her and she was walking through this place
like a fucking bad out of hell.
I could just tell, I know exactly how she is. She this place like a fucking bad out of hell. I could just tell.
I know exactly how she is.
She gets so amped up when she finds a deal or like when she's like driving by like something
really nice that people are throwing out and she garbage picks it.
This girl, it's like fucking heroin to her.
So she comes home and she goes wait.
Something that we like to do is like whenever we go shopping the first thing we do when we get home is we show the other person
like, oh, this is what I got.
She's like, wait until you see what I got.
And I'm like, all right, let's see.
And she shows me all these clothes and vintage, you know, and some of the,
most 99.99% of stuff, awesome.
That point 001, though, she goes, puts down and she goes,
I have a Halloween idea where I'm gonna take
long white candlesticks, I'm gonna melt them
and shape them like squigglys and put eyes on them
and they'll look like ghosts and it'll be
a perfect Halloween candle.
And I go, hmm, okay, I look at it and I go,
yeah, one, two, three, four, six, seven, eight, nine,
yeah, I go, that, one, two, three, four, six, seven, eight, nine. Yeah.
I go, that's a menorah.
She made a candle.
She brought home a fucking rod iron menorah.
She didn't know what it was.
Bro, in her fucking like, she's right on the induced stupor.
She's like, oh, this is perfect.
And she fucking fully bought just a menorah.
Guess what?
Not Jewish, my wife?
Not Jewish, she did.
Oh, so not Jewish.
Also definitely not Jewish.
But she was like, we should take this.
She turned it into Halloween.
But she didn't even realize it was a menorah.
She's like, oh no, it's not.
She's like, how many days do they have?
I was like, eight.
She goes, look, there's nine candles.
And I was like, yeah, but there's one in the middle that stays lit. And she was like, no, it's not. She's like how many days do they have? I was like, hey, she's like there's nine candles and I was like Yeah, but there's one in the middle that stays lit and she was like no, no
But we're setting up we were setting up our Halloween decorations the other day
And she fucking puts it out. She's like, oh my god. I love it. And I go, yeah, it's a menorah
It's like a straight-up menorah. Where is it? Oh, we got rid of it
She's like can I use yours question. She's like is it cute? Oh, we got rid of it. Because she's, she's like, can I ask you a serious question?
She's like, is it cute?
I'm like, yes, it's cute.
She's like, is it a menorah?
I was like, yes, it's a menorah.
It's a full 100%.
Was it a full blow?
Big menorah, dude.
Yeah, full blow.
And she's like, but why would they have a leaf on it?
Because it had like a, like a raw iron leaf.
And I was like, the juice love leaves.
But also, how is that Halloween?
No, she thought it was fall like.
She wanted a candelabra, bro.
She wanted a fucking candelabra
like the ghost would walk through.
Oh, is that the thing from what's it called
Beauty and the Beast?
Yes, yes, yes.
And she's like, is it insensitive and insulting
if I put ghost son of menorah? I was like, yeah. Is it? I would say so. Yeah. It's a it's a piece of religious
like
symbolism for the for practicing Jewish people. I mean she's not you know using it in a blast
Miss Wei she's making candles. She's making ghosts squiggly candles. I'm pretty sure ask any Jew. They'd be like, nah
I don't think that's cool
I feel like they'd be less cool with the way you said that
ask any Jew
Take an easy buddy. Jesus. That was a hard J there
You got a you got a ease into it. You're gonna say you get it like Jew. Yeah, you can't just like you can't ask any Jew
Say that
You can't really come out
You can't say that. You can't tell.
The contempt really comes out.
Ask Adolfo.
Like, take it easy, Frank.
Jesus, Christmas.
Well, not Christmas.
Not Christmas.
That's the point.
That's the point.
Hanaka.
So she's like, all right, we have to,
I was like, yeah, we need to get rid of this.
But that begs the question.
So, dinner question.
Can you throw out a menorah?
Yes, it's gonna say, did you throw it in the garbage?
It's in our, like, it's garbage.
Not in the garbage can, but like where we put the garbage out.
The garbage.
Next to the garbage, no.
Like, it's getting ready to be thrown out,
but it hasn't yet been thrown out.
What does that make you good?
I don't know.
I hope so.
OK, well, the two guys are going to just stop.
We do have more, like, doing ads after I just said that is weird.
All right, let's talk about something else randomly. Watch this.
Favorite Pokemon?
Zapdos? Go for it.
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Also, I kind of wanted to talk about I mean we talked about it briefly before we started recording but the video
Of the love surge. Oh my god. Do you have that? Can you like pull that up real? Yeah, I absolutely can pull it up
Joey. I'm so glad that you asked
Although you're the one sitting in front of a computer. Yeah, I probably shouldn't
Because I don't even trust you to do it quickly anyway. Yeah, well, I don't care what you trust slow dainty fingers
Can my fingers rather not be dainty?
Probably just describe it first though. Okay, so I'll describe it
Go for it
So I'll describe it.
Go for it.
Fucking loser. You asked me to pull something up
and then you say,
no, I'm gonna do it this way
and then I'm gonna do it.
No.
No.
Okay.
So anyway.
You okay? I'm so sorry.
I love you.
I love you though.
No, you don't.
I told you about this thing that you do all the time.
Okay, I'm not gonna play into this anymore.
But there was this couple and like,
there's a woman like, do you wanna know that it's cringy thing and her husband is behind him
Shaking he's like oh my god, and she's like he's having a looser right now, which means he's like so full of love
One by the way these are full grown these are full growns you would get if you guessed
Sub-18 children you're wrong. Why would you guess that? You freak, you loser.
What's wrong with you?
Why do you want to see that?
They were full adults.
They're full of ground.
Full big old adults.
Yeah, and then she's like,
he's having a love surge and then he grabs me
and then I start shaking and then we explode with love.
And listen, I'm okay with you having some weird love.
Everyone has some weird love with that stuff.
Yeah, I do, you do. You probably go and you know you and your wife you're like well, you my little to-toot like you know
You pretend your birds or something like people have stuff like that. Why why?
Toot toot. I don't know. I don't know
Okay, you know my little bird and you do stupid stuff because it's cute and it's yours
And it's allowed to be yours. We're in love. You do stupid things and it's like silly and it's dumb but
But you keep that in the confines of the house And it's allowed to be yours. We are in love, you do stupid things, and it's like silly, and it's dumb. But, but, but,
You keep that in the confines of the house here.
Listen, you keep it in a box here.
Front door, back door, any basement doors you have, keep it within those doors, okay?
You don't put it on the internet, of course the people are gonna rip you apart,
because when I saw that, I literally wanted to throw a toast during the bath and hop in.
Oh, you, oh, that, in that order?
So you knew what you were doing. Yeah. Oh, you didn't want to go in first. Well, I think everyone knows what they'reaster in the bath and hop in. Oh, you owe that in that order? So you knew what you were doing.
Yeah.
Oh, you didn't want to go in first.
Well, I think everyone knows what they're doing
with the toaster, baby.
Well, I think they, but they go with, they go in first
and then they throw the toaster inside
so they don't have time to think about it.
That's, well, this is getting dark.
Oh, Jesus.
I'm sorry, but listen, people are destroying this woman
and her boyfriend online.
Yeah. Which unfair.
I just don't want to see it, but I don't need to see it because let's be honest.
First of all, he's playing into it and I think she's an influencer.
Yeah, they are.
So like, come on, like you should have known, you're not helping your own cow diet, dude.
You're not dieting it.
I don't even know what you're saying.
You know, and he's behind her and he's like, well, he's doing it. I don't even know what you're saying. You know?
And he's behind her and he's like,
and I feel bad.
I feel bad that they're getting a lot of hate.
But I also hate.
I would just call it, you know, they're getting a lot of hate.
Hates?
I don't feel bad about that stupid love search thing though.
Yeah, I don't like that.
I don't like it.
But like we said, everyone's got some of that stuff.
Everyone does. Yeah. I'm, listen, I I don't like it. But like we said, everyone's got some of that stuff.
Everyone does.
Yeah.
I'm, listen, I, and it's cute.
You guys call each other stupid names or something?
Don't, don't you dare, bitch.
It's what happens in our house, stays in our house.
It's like Vegas, but my house.
Okay?
We have our own little thing.
But I'm saying, do you guys have like,
names for each other?
Of course we do, but, but if I were to tell the world,
100 names for your kids.
I'm assuming one of them is for your wife.
Yes, I have one for my wife.
Let's get over here.
What is it?
Right here.
The name is Get in the Kitchen.
It's called grilled cheese now.
Oh my God, real quick, real quick side bar.
I had a moment the other day that I like stopped.
And I was like, ah, that didn't feel right.
We have like in the basement, we have like toy kitchens. and like they're stocked with like toy foods and stuff like that and a thing that
When Ruby wants to go downstairs and play she goes dad that can we go cook and play?
Which means can we go downstairs? It's cutest thing in the world. It's adorable little angel and
We go down there and her thing recently is as she says are you hungry?
And I say yes, and she goes all right
I'm gonna make you food and she goes and she comes back with a toy sandwich.
And it's like, it's kids teaching his daughter,
General, so that's correct.
No, and the other day, I'm like, Ruby, you wanna go downstairs?
I need you to make me a sandwich.
And I was like, that didn't feel good.
Ruby, how about today we play upstairs
and you make a real fucking sandwich,
because I'm starving.
Ruby, where's my meat?
I said, well done. Guess that went out the window, Ruby? I guess we're not putting salt on things now, huh?
No, listen, you have your own things. This just sucks. This reeks of salt. Wait, can we
know the name of the ukulele? No, I'm not doing that. Can we know the name she calls you?
Uh, we have multiple.
Yeah, I assume.
What do you call your fucking wife?
Huh?
It's not about me.
Give me an example of a cutie name that you guys had.
Bro, I'm talking about Kuki.
Kuki?
Kuki?
I told you about the ones that my mom would call us.
Oh, that's right.
That's right.
Kiki Kuda dude son of a bunny.
Yeah, yeah. Shannie, Manny, Puppo, Panny, and Joey Loilo. Yeah, my, um, I'm trying to ones that my mom would call us. Oh, that's right, that's right. Keezy Kududson, a bunny,
Shannie, Manny Puppo Panny, and Joey Loilo.
Yeah, my, I'm trying to think of my mom,
like my dad would call us Froggy.
I remember that.
I remember that that sucked up.
Chris was fishy, Nick was picky, and Jessica was Shashi.
Shashi, Shashi, Shashi.
Who was picky?
Nick.
That's not a picky, Nicky.
Fishy, Chrissy, Froggy, Frankie, and Shashi. That's what he would say. fishy, fishy, froggy, Frankie and Shashi.
That's what he would say.
Her name is Jessica, Fr.
Yeah, I know.
Shashi Jessica?
I know.
I don't really roll.
I don't know.
I don't know.
And then my mom would mostly like, you know, do your homework.
That's what she'd call us.
Right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've heard that before.
But can I have cute names?
They've evolved over time.
Evolved?
Yeah.
So like, oh, so the first one is still part of this new one?
It's like, it's become like a bastardization of whatever it was at first.
You've been using that word a lot lately too, I've been meaning to tell you about that.
Yeah.
Because you've been using bastardization a lot.
How's it?
Yeah.
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
Yeah, really.
Yeah.
Sorry.
Sex education season four is coming out.
Yeah, I'm psyched about that. I'm so excited
So I have to be brave boy. You're gonna be away for the weekend though. How are you gonna watch it?
I'm probably just gonna get back and watch it
I'll probably have it done by then wow
But because you love education and sex yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, absolutely nice. It is weird to watch though. Like Beckadise
said, I'm rewatching it and two of our two children are named from two people, not named
after two people from the show, but like have the same names. Oh wow. Ruby and Maitre.
Yeah. Oh wow. You guys are big fans of the show. No, we just like the name. Ruby and
Maitre. Two actors from the show. We just like the names. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. had a son you were gonna nail mode is I know you know absolutely now
He was he was gonna be maybe Francisco
Really I would think so but I mean no way I name it kid Joey oh
Well, not a great line there Joe
What's that supposed to mean I'm I'm great
Amazing dude, I'm glad. I'm amazing, dude.
Well, I'm glad you joked about that because I was starting to feel bad.
Like, did I make a joke that was too real?
Um, oh, Jesus.
You did it.
Who did what?
You.
This is Gaslight!
No.
Um, we have our own cutie names.
They are two, they are ourselves.
One of them is Peep.
Who's Peep?
You were her. We're both peep you were her we're both
peeps oh you're both peep yeah that's not bad I think it's cute you know why it get why because
um when we first started dating we were like we she'd like stuff in my place or I stuff in her
place I don't remember and in the middle of the night she peed the bed okay oh you little peep
you didn't have a peep in my bed. Bro, if she had pissed the bed,
I already know how that would have went.
Fucking bang.
See you later.
Thank you for your service.
I wouldn't have said that.
I know, but yeah, peep.
You know, I also, it's because I love marshmallow peeps too.
That's a big one.
I like that.
So it was disgusting, but I'm gonna like that so much.
And then we've gone through like, you know, like,
I called her when we were first watching
soprano together, I called her my gaba girlfriend.
My gaba girlfriend.
And then you have a gaba name for Ruby?
Yeah, she's a gaba goofin.
Gaba goofin.
It's a big name in our household.
Gaba goofin.
And that has morphed into Tonka, Tonka truck.
What? What?
Wait.
Is she Tonka truck?
Yeah.
How did that morph from Gaba Goon?
I don't know.
It just did.
Tonka truck.
Yeah. It was like, what's up, my Tonka truck?
Yeah.
When it's our cute little names.
Tonka.
If I share it with him.
If I share it with the world, it then becomes made fun of for me.
It's fine though.
Yeah.
It's okay, because names are just a word.
It's like the name.
It's what you put behind it.
Like anytime, if I walked into your house and you're like this.
Dude, that guy wants a cheat on her so bad, dude.
Dude, look at him.
He's just like that love surge.
That means if you don't give it to him, he's going to go and fucking love surge all over
somebody else's back
Good lord dude
It's crazy that you would say that
He's a real people out there, but that is weird like that. I don't like like that do it again That's another thing. It's like do it in your house and like you open and she was like we open up
Yeah, it's like it's nothing for you anymore. Can you just you can't even keep listening the weird love shit to your sound?
Listen, this is gonna be a quote that you can plaster all over the airwaves, okay?
Sometimes that was the most boomer should have ever heard my tar live. You can plaster this all over the airwaves all over
You're twit talk when it comes to relationships,, not everyone needs to know what your Tonka truck is.
That's it.
Are you saying Tonka?
Tonka.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, what do you think I was saying?
I, it sounded like you weren't saying Tonka.
No, I was saying Tonka.
Well, you wanted me to say it more powerful,
like you do with Tonka.
Tonka.
No, I don't.
That's what you do.
No, I don't.
Yeah, you do.
Tonka truck.
Have you ever had any cutie names in any relationships?
I don't think so.
Definitely not something to the, like, similar to Tonka truck.
Like, that is just like random as fuck.
We had to cut back.
We had to actively say like, yo, we need to cut back on baby talk.
Because we would do it so much with the kids that it would like see been to like our normal
life.
Yeah, that's when we did the video and you said said Blendal, yeah, you had no idea.
Yeah, it's just seeping into your life now.
It was a lot of people see that and they still laugh
about it.
Thank you.
That's great.
I've seen that video.
I've seen that clip recently and like,
you had no idea that you said.
I didn't and the reason was because
Blendal?
I would talk with miles like that.
I'd be like, oh, we're gonna go and we're gonna play
Pablo Vengels.
Yeah, so like Blendu.
Yeah, you know.
It's racist though, honestly, if I'm like, now.
Blendu?
Yeah, just feels like what you just did was racist.
I don't know why.
Pablo Vengels?
Yeah.
And I'm, we would say it the whole sentence.
Oh, we're gonna go pay a Pablo Vengels.
Yeah, for some reason, I don't know.
Really?
Yeah. Huh, let's get some, say something else. Let's say, I'm gonna go pay a powwow, thank you. Yeah, for some reason, I don't know. Really? Yeah.
Huh, let's get some, say something else.
Let's say, I'm gonna put two things out there.
That and something way worse.
And let's see what people find,
what people find way worse.
I know, say that.
Something racist.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So the Tonka truck, huh?
I think it's a cute name.
But I get how you would get the, I don't know, the bridge.
It couldn't go from that.
There had to be a bunch in between.
There was so, dude, so much.
It's so much.
And like, also a go-go-go-go-go-go.
That's another one.
That like, is that your daughter?
That's what Becca calls, like, I think Ruby.
Should be like my bag of go-go-go-go.
That was the beginning of that?
Bad.
So it's bad. It's girl. I thought back. I was like beginning that bad like so it's bad bad girl. I thought back
No, it's girl, but like she in her head. She told me she said it because of like
She was trying to impersonate like a typical like Long Island like how they would say something like oh my god
They went out with the government rules. Oh, yeah, you know, and then it became literally like
Oh, yeah, you know, and then it became literally like
It's cute listen each family as you grow up and you you spend your life with a partner And you have children maybe or dogs dude how many times have you called Charlie fucking light little like dumpster bitch or something cute
Yeah, he has a he has a bunch of names. What what give me give me like three
Charlie Charlie lowly lowly he's he was Charlie then he was barley then he was borrows then he has a bunch of names. But what, give me like three. Charlie, Charlie, lowly, lowly.
Well, he was Charlie, then he was Barley,
then he was Barles, then he's a bar.
A bar?
He's just a bar.
Bar?
Yeah, because like, I literally look like a bar.
I remember Barley, I remember that one.
Yeah, and then it was just a bar.
Like, now he's not bar, he's a bar.
A bar, yeah.
So like, Eric Ibar.
So if I go on vacation or something,
I usually, my mom watches them and my sister lives next door
So she'll take pictures of them and I'll just right back a bar or something. Oh, it was it's fucking cute
And my sister does the same things I sent her a picture the other day because like it was like mad nice out
And like my family grew chat was like talking to her in the morning
So I was I sent a picture. I was like, oh, we're on a breezy little walk and then she was like a breezy bar
Like that. Yeah, I've been calling Maeve, like a bad girl.
Like when she like, like won't calm down,
I'd be like, you're being a bad girl
and evolved into a bad banana.
Because she was eating bananas and making a mess of it.
So I called her a bad, she a bad banana.
And this morning Becca sent me a picture of her eating. And I just responded, oh, look at my bab banana. And this morning Becca sent me a picture of her eating and I just responded. Oh look at my big banana
Becca ghost hey, don't don't write that. Say are you sending me a picture right now?
Because it hasn't gone through yet. Yeah, I mean I wouldn't say big banana. I would say look at it's a banana
Benanito, it's a banana. It's definitely a banana. It's a banana.
It is a banana.
Oh, look at my banana.
It's just a banana.
It's just a banana.
All right, well, I think we can stop there with the banana.
Cocktog.
Let me just touch the tips.
Yeah, I got it from here.
You want me to do it?
Go ahead, throw it to me.
F-alvers 885 on Twitter.
The Frank Alvers and all the forms of social media. Check out that boy at Joe Santa Gatto. You can also check do it? Go ahead, throw it to me. FL verse 885 on Twitter, the Frank Alvers and all the forms of
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Sign it off.
The fabulous Frank Alvarez.
Sign it off.
The Jolopy Joe Santa Gato.
Yeah!
Yeah!
Come on, I'm gonna say anything.
Okay. Thank you guys.