The Basement Yard - The 48th St Files

Episode Date: February 14, 2017

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Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 welcome back to the basement yard it is Monday February 13th a day before Valentine's Day someone's getting fucked tomorrow with an age at okay yeah get ahead Keith okay what was that I tried to say I tried to say with arrangements but those are actual Frankie's making those noises um I am joined by my brother Keith and my friend Frankie fucking rock on all of the frat star before before we turn them yeah there he goes I need to I'm stressed okay so before we turn the mics on we were just telling random stories about whatever but this one specific I don't even know how it came up but when
Starting point is 00:00:51 we were I want to say second grade third grade or something you know the the yellow card song Ocean Avenue which says if I could find you Frankie try to convince me that that was the radio edit and that the real version was if I could fuck you now things would be better do we know if it is actually my mind was my mind was in the wrong place at that you just wanted me to believe when that video starts I don't know what the fuck happened he fell out of a window leg was bent the fuck you're talking about you don't remember the beginning of that song I've never seen the music I just remember that he looked
Starting point is 00:01:28 like a hard rock Clegan he's reminded me of Ed Norton the lead singer yeah yeah Eminem no so he was white we got that we just named the three whitest people also Frankie was about to tell a story and I had to cut him off because I was like you gotta just tell this again I don't know how we got here we did it did you just throw up my eyes are tearing are you okay no are you gonna throw up keep I do I'll do it if I throw up I'll throw up then I'll do that we're not stopping this pot I can't believe I'm telling this story on this almost on Valentine's Day yeah for the for the Romantic's out there for the
Starting point is 00:02:28 Romantic's when I was in sixth grade was when I first discovered the appendage in between my legs the dick yeah so somehow all these episodes come back to jerking off yeah I mean of course I knew it existed before that but like that was when I first was like I wonder what happens if you touch this for an extended period for like a while it feels good against the carpet so I used to what do you mean what does it look like we all know what it looks like an olive loaf I believe so I would have my alone time in in the shower and I would last I remember we had this little yellow card no well maybe we had this
Starting point is 00:03:21 little radio that I would put on in the shot like in the bathroom and listen to like Elvis Duran who whatever not gonna get started on Elvis Duran but and then like songs of that era would come on and you know how like Z100 plays the same songs over and over and over again yeah so I can always remember the first song would be the first song would always be Ashley Simpson pieces of me and then the next song that would start would be who best thank the reason oh my god it's so funny is because I'm just like sitting there's like in the shower like yeah and the first and the first words of the song are I'm not a perfect
Starting point is 00:04:11 person immediately like this I immediately would be like fuck yeah they know but he would never stop ever no it was like I never deter you I was like hate hate it yeah I hate it so good I hate it oh it hurts so good I remember I was so pissed off one like cuz like my birthday that year my uncle gave me a card that said we all know why you take long showers so I got yeah I got like super like upset about it and like just like didn't talk to him like you're the idiot man yeah washing my body I'm a growing boy yeah I've got hair now yeah it's probably in three pubes good time I have pubes real early let's just throw
Starting point is 00:05:03 that out there I mean you let's just throw it out there so if I know so let's get that off the bat had a beard in like seventh grade no before we move on I got hair really all right I just got hair all right so yesterday was the Grammys which was fucking interesting first of all I want to talk about Beyonce without the Beyonce fans going insane on me but I wish you guys saw it because she had a performance where I'm not even sure if she sang like honestly because I was very confused but it was like like rhythmic talking little little like I thought I was watching a monk do do whatever they do like it was no they have a val of
Starting point is 00:05:50 silence yeah was this a silent film yeah no but it was like they would show it was like a hologram and then there was people and then it was Beyonce she had fucking 15 arms and then she there was a voice over like everyone's everyone's a person and life is what you make it was just she was just saying weird shit and she was whispering is like we are all together as one I was like what is going on and then I was like is she even here because they cut to a scene and I was like oh this is her she's on a stage and then a different scene would show up I'm like okay that's not her I guess then she emerges and she's wearing this
Starting point is 00:06:31 thing that looks like she's the Statue of Liberty yeah like a crown yeah and then she has she's pregnant with twins and then at one point she sits in a chair that was like obviously a machine or whatever but it fucking tilts almost so she's parallel to the ground and I'm like she's got one is pregnant with two and you're gonna put her in this they were ready to slide out at that point in time shoot out that would have been good TV that would have been great TV just let across the stage yeah I mean there was a secret in Vegas which one went farther shut the fuck up keep oh boy well I'm just kind of I'm not gonna
Starting point is 00:07:17 say more than this but I'm just kind of a little sick of Beyonce right now she it was a little ridiculous like the barstool dudes were like ripping her oh my god they were going they're like yeah like you're the first woman to give birth relax because they were making it like a huge thing but I love how her posts were so like moving and humble that's what one of my friends said a kid that I know I shouldn't say friend associate from from college he was like she's so humble I was like yeah there's nothing more humble than breaking the internet posting pictures of you for not just like one like different pictures are like
Starting point is 00:07:51 underwater pregnant just I'm not gonna continue also C. Lo Green showed up in a fucking I don't even know this guy was painted gold it was was that a mask or it like I'd know it was a mask it had to be or he I don't know what I don't know what happened to his face that's what rock bottom looks like first of all if you painted John Travolta's face he would look like that that guy has no face anymore I love gold basically yeah he literally looked like a Power Ranger villain exactly like that exactly like that I was blown away what I didn't even know he had music out last year because apparently he lost apparently after he
Starting point is 00:08:33 lost I saw that he like drove away like double in the birds to everyone double middle fingers in the air that's he's a tiny dude yeah he's like five one yeah he looks like he I said he looked like the golden snitch from Harry Potter like he was just golden round and just wearing a mask and I don't understand like why does celebrities do that because they want to this is like how they get that publicity yeah like don't like don't you have any like dignity why was Mike Posner that's another Frankie look I saw it I saw it you saw the picture yeah I was not good what are you doing had blonde hair went into a pole and then
Starting point is 00:09:10 became green or just looks like he has green yeah that's to offer to keep us like he went to a pool had purple went yellow now it's red yeah I and it's like he's way too white to do that I just do that was the weirdest thing did you see his interview no he was with some guy I think he was calling black bear or poo bear or something bear black bear I think it was black poo bear some other dude who had the same colored hair and they were both giving the weirdest answers to questions it like how you feeling are you like what about the the Grammys he's like I feel green that's what he said I just above all I
Starting point is 00:09:51 feel green he took 57 pills it looks like yeah it fucking abyss but that guy is fucking crazy now and he was clearly wearing like like makeup and was wearing a hoop earring and it was just a very strange thing and now we can all honestly say yes we do think that we're cooler than him yeah 100% you think you can and then me hot I just want to play ready how are you doing tonight I'm doing well don't forget black bear he's in the building too this is great terrible I feel awful ostracized ugly and most of all green and then he kept saying mansions mansions just mansions he
Starting point is 00:10:48 could have been on acid because like he's promoting his fucking new single or whatever called mansions so you do it that way yeah I just don't see like he's like I feel like people every year there's at least one artist that just loses it yeah well in this case there was those two might be black bear every fucking year now that's crazy black bear I mean he was never like but that's the other thing why the fuck is Mike Posner at the Grammys I don't I mean he had he had a pill in a visa I think it got a Grammy nom for what I don't know that video is fucking weird too I didn't see it if I hear that song one more time both
Starting point is 00:11:24 my kneecaps are going yeah and like oh my god the only perfect the only appropriate time to hear that is either a in a visa or in Vegas yeah when you're on the verge of taking it blacking out yeah or by accident when you're changing the channels yeah it was like it way too much I but yeah why the heck was it just weird that he went from like what seemed to be this can not conservative but just you know I mean generally conservative person when he was putting out that music and now he's got green here I feel green and ostracized dude sick who do you think goes crazier quicker actors or musicians
Starting point is 00:12:07 actors depending on their roles I don't know man I mean you look at people that have hit like rock bottom like who do you think has gone crazier quicker Kanye or Shia LaBeouf Kanye dude shy is he's like that artistic fucking person yeah but it's still fucking crazy he's he's reached past artistic and he's he's he's absurd now I don't know I think I don't know what it's hard to answer I don't know I don't know I feel like in the mute the like music's like a trance almost you know what I mean like they get lost in it but I could see what you're saying you get lost in your role yeah I could see that
Starting point is 00:12:44 too I just think it's because they're famous I don't think it has to do with any of that I think when you're famous you have all these people like oh yeah man that's the coolest idea ever yeah that's sick and you're just like yeah man whatever I think is right yeah you're like you're fucking dumb you need that one guy like what do you fucking an idiot yeah in my in my head I still think even Steven Shia LaBeouf and I think of through the wire Kanye West yeah TPT it was all right it really I mean kind of yeah we went we did a complete 90 degree turn yeah meme 180 there we go I mean he's not wrong 90s in a different
Starting point is 00:13:27 guess he's not wrong he's not around they're wrong oh by the way on a lighter note jail all hotter than fucking ever oh my god she gets better with age she does she's like a fine wine she's a box of fine wine she can literally if she told me you'll never see your mom again I said who's my mom who I don't even know you're talking about yeah I say that all about a lot of people but jail is up there jail is so good man it's crazy like there's she's got to be like a robot or something there's no way she's like 50 right she's definitely on like steroids or something hold on let me look it up real quick JLo she's 50 she's
Starting point is 00:14:04 not 50 I think she might be like 45 50 JLo is 74 47 that's crazy no let the defense JLo's 47 dude she's oh my she's hotter than everyone I know she's 20 yet well anyone yeah she's 22 anyone I've ever probably seen she's hotter than all of them and she's 47 Jennifer Aniston's up there because Jennifer Aniston's older than her Jessica Biel Jessica Biel is hot too she's young Jessica Biel is only like 33 or something like that Jessica Jessica Jeff Jennifer Lopez is hotter than them though Jennifer Aniston is another one who's timeless I don't know man you know who still does it for me
Starting point is 00:14:53 damn it fucking what Emma Watson or some shit well yeah she's she's pretty hot too but like older woman damn it who was the one that was in Meryl Streep nope who's the one that was in Rocky Heart Picture Show he just lost me there no you know it's on the tip of my tongue I can't think of it her name is on the tip my tongue is someone Ness there's a nest in there it's someone that's slippy slappy Susan Sarandon Sarandon's dude first of all still hot to me I don't know why she's hot to me I don't know why but she's 70 I don't care what she is she's hot 70 I don't care Susan Sarandon she's still hot who's the one
Starting point is 00:15:32 I mean I'm not saying this person's hot here you go shut up there he is dad the actor that we say it look like looks like mom oh from Mrs. Doubtfire oh sorry Sally Field yes Sally Field Sally Field yes she does she reminds me my mom she does remind me of your mom too yeah it's lit you know who reminds me of my mom Oprah I was gonna make Oprah reminds me of you always say that my mom has Oprah's hair I was gonna make a joke but if my mom ever heard this she would backhand me and I don't want to disrespect her like that that's moms no your mom definitely reminds me of Oprah she has Oprah's hair and like Aunt
Starting point is 00:16:13 Jemima my mom my mom once ruined Eva Longoria for me so this was like back in like oh six she's another one I got a little hurry it was just like still is a straight dime but my mom one day she's 41 my mom one day was like people say I look like Eva Longoria was like done boner killed good night gone yeah that's thanks chop it off at that point in time even Mendez 42 even Mendez doesn't do it as much for me I mean she's a great-looking person I mean she's above average I'll give you a high 50 dude some how it doesn't do it for me well I mean you could just recognize the fact that she is an attractive woman she I
Starting point is 00:16:52 mean yeah she's a beautiful Victoria Beckham for Sofia Vergara 44 yeah so fear regard Jessica Alba 35 looks that's the first one that's the Jessica I was thinking about oh Jessica Alba well Jessica Biel is not too old either she's like 35 too yeah Jessica they're all beautiful all beautiful strong independent women Jessica Biel 34 what are we doing now everyone's like what the fuck is this all right before we move on we got some sponsors here first one MVMT MVMT watches pronounced movement okay it was founded on the belief that style shouldn't break the bank this is a company started by two
Starting point is 00:17:36 broke college kids I wanted to wear stylish watch watches but couldn't afford them so they started their own company which is kind of dope because I'm all about that you know being broke and starting from the ground and then you know using your looks to get to wherever you need to go you know that's yeah yeah movement watches started just $95 at a department store you're looking at four to 500 bucks yeah they have over 1 million watches sold in over a hundred sixty countries get 15% off today with free shipping and free returns by going to MVMT watches dot com slash basement that's MVMT watches dot com slash
Starting point is 00:18:16 basement our other sponsor today yeah is Luke crate which is a new one new to the basement sorry fucking love Luke crate yeah Frank is a big Luke Luke crate guy I get I've gotten Luke crate for like so I want to say for a year I think so yeah like every month they'll send ever since we did that video yeah it's fucking awesome I love I for people I don't know I am big into movies big into science fiction pop cult like comic books superheroes we get it you see all that stuff and Luke crate is the absolute greatest thing on the planet yeah so if you sign up basically every month you'll get a package that has you know it
Starting point is 00:19:03 depends what you would you pick but sorry like pop culture things you get like shirts or you got Funko pop sometimes fuck is that the funcals like a little collectible vinyl dolls oh yeah you get stuff like that it's just like a bunch of like different things and and they you know I get it I have all my shit whatever doesn't fit me I give to Keith which is everything friend Tommy oh yeah our friend Tommy gets it as well it's actually really really cool like if you're into stuff like that they have like each month I believe they have different themed stuff and you know like Halloween they'll do like horror movies
Starting point is 00:19:39 and they'll do one month like superheroes what who is the Halloween guy turns Christmas into Halloween Jack Skellington there we go you mean those socks were ridiculous oh yeah they always have really good socks I picked I picked some greatest part of every single out the socks every single one yeah fire ones I'm wearing right now look at those Bing bang heat bang yeah anyway hold on oh if you want to get fancy get a bigger box with even bigger loot with lucrate DX hey and if you want to geek out your pet try loot pets which I didn't fucking know until right now might have to sign up for that kidding hell yeah
Starting point is 00:20:29 offer expires February 19th at 9 p.m. I almost said specific but Pacific alright get ready for February's pop culture theme build lucrate has awesome and exclusive items from the most popular put together French French franchise franchises this February experience iconic items from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers Batman Lego dimensions and Tetris including as always our monthly t-shirt and pin go to lucrate.com slash yard and enter my code yard to save $3 off any new subscription today alright so just so you know usually my code is basement so if yard isn't working then use basement but here on this copy it
Starting point is 00:21:14 says yard but if that doesn't work then try basement but I would try yard first again that's lucrate.com slash yard and enter the code yard you get $3 off any new subscription today alright we're done sign me up for the big box yeah DX suck I'm gonna get I'm gonna get a pet just to get it I'm gonna buy the loot pets and then just get a pet yeah after the after don't care yeah don't doesn't matter what it doesn't matter I'm gonna get what kind of pet do you have I don't know yet whatever what do you have what do you want yeah put on your gerbil yeah anyway so I've mentioned this in passing and briefly but the people who are on
Starting point is 00:22:01 this podcast today are the people who I started making videos with when I was super young so my mom got me this camera that recorded on cassette tapes by the way every time tapes it was I mean they were like what'd you left it's cassette it's tomato tomato I mean yeah yeah it's kind of redundant but we get yeah I know but you know you know I have such a hard time saying cassette tape because one time I said cassette tape and like I have to say it slowly every single time but anyway it would record on cassette fuck and if you wanted to edit you just had to rewind and then tape over it there was no editing we needed to redo
Starting point is 00:22:48 whatever we did yeah there were some there were some gems that we lost my we didn't lose any I have a bunch of tapes I wish I had no you don't have the one that I fucking wanted do you remember the hide-and-seek one that we accidentally filmed over oh my god yeah that was funny we used to do skits like he ran you were looking like panel where is he went into the closet and he's he had a fight put the whole fucking suit on and then he put himself in the hangar in the hangar he's just like oh my god I remember I don't remember the first thing but then it was a mixture of first of all it was mostly like jackass things like
Starting point is 00:23:24 I had a big medicine ball and we would just like jump on it and almost snap our necks and we would always do it quickly because my mom would come home never allow us to do it she's like you're gonna break your fucking neck yeah we would jump off of like the you know like the stone thing right outside in between your house and your neighbor's wall and as soon as we would do it we would just sprint right back inside my mom's coming and then we used to do other ones where yeah like the jackass ones we used to search the neighborhoods for the biggest cardboard boxes we can find and then put people
Starting point is 00:23:59 like we'd put ourselves in it and then like hit it with like a branch yeah I do like high low tackles on it do you remember when I fucking dropkick this kid I think that was the first one we did that could have gone viral and I wish I I still had I don't know if I still have that I feel like someone taped over it no you definitely have it all right so I definitely have it but dude Frankie I really don't like this Keith Frankie put a garbage can the garbage can from my kitchen we took it it was a dark it wasn't it wasn't from your kitchen it was a big round one from outside no it was a green one it was a
Starting point is 00:24:32 dark green one the first time we did it yeah I remember and Frankie's like and we took it and Frankie put it over his head and Keith ran and with both feet dropkicked I hit you right in the face I know I got pretty high I know Frankie hit the fucking floor and you know it's the it's crazy if I find that I'm uploading it by the way the other the other one is the one Richie tackle do you remember he hit him oh yeah the frame like it was so fast yeah we were down by the dumps and I was I was just standing in it and he as fast as he could their neighbor Richie it was a tank when we were like ten pounds soaking
Starting point is 00:25:09 and he hit me so hard and I remember just getting up and I was in I was dazed I really was we used to do the dumbest shit like I do you remember someone took like one of those baseball baseball belts yeah yeah they have like cork at the end of it and we were slapping each other with it and we had fucking welts all over our body like dicks yeah well it's like this I remember that was the first one that I was Danny yeah because Danny was in it and we were like we wouldn't curse in it because we we would show your parents we wouldn't want them to hear us cursing but Danny and it was like this is gonna fucking hurt yeah we
Starting point is 00:25:40 were like oh shit you stop man bro chill it was so funny I don't know we're going into like no we'll stay on 48 year falls well it was we and then we did like skits we did like the wrestling ones I mean we did a lot of wrestling hold on now hold on too much yeah no what you did too much of was you guys did a fucking rave light show for a good half fucking hour oh my god do you remember that no we found glow sticks me yeah that was the night before we went to splish splash I remember that I don't remember before like another thing that you guys did was the skin of Jerry Springer oh yeah that was amazing David
Starting point is 00:26:26 sorry Dennis was announcing you guys he's like here it comes the bus driver no it was it was I forgot what it was but and I remember I said to you I was like I'll be friends with you since day numero one yes and you fucking lost it I don't know why but you lost it oh my god do you remember we did a music video to Aerosmith oh my god I don't want to miss a thing I had a drum set in my basement and Frank he was playing a guitar and with no rhythm whatsoever yeah it's like you you could tell he's we're not playing I mean probably not it was so low like quality like you couldn't even yeah like it wasn't like dubbing a
Starting point is 00:27:04 song over a video we had to play the song in the background yeah through his speakers and then like Joey was like just like lightly tapping the drums and I was just like strumming and then at one point he just crashed on the cymbals scared this shit out of both of us he turned around he was like what are you doing at one point you stood up and you're just like rubbing the sticks around the ceiling like we're just not even playing I'm humping the guitar at one point yeah oh my god what about the ghetto was it a vase yes I remember that you stole the other shoes I was the midget and I'm sorry dwarf little person I'm sorry no
Starting point is 00:27:40 but we were able to shoot in black and white or sepia sepia tone I remember yeah so I remember we shot in like sepia we like it was it was the we shot in sepia one of the one of the like the smokestacks down by the bed plant and we made it sound like it was a tornado we just go we were literally got so low quality so it was just a it was just a cylinder that stuck out in the air so I zoomed in on it so much that you couldn't tell what it was gray and then I was shaking the camera and Frank you're just going oh man you were remember you were like a gay it's Simba like next week we're
Starting point is 00:28:25 doing the line came you're gonna hear me raw I'm simple worry like I'm gonna be queen of this beat oh my god holy shit oh man we did we did some good stuff oh it was great American Idol we wrote on it we tried to draw the American Idol symbol then I held it up in front of the camera and Frank he was going by the way in the background of that one I'm playing RuneScape pretty hard you were that was what you did like eight hours in every video you did oh my god that just reminded me there was one time I'm rapping yeah so I came home from school I came home from school and Keith was downstairs and he was on the
Starting point is 00:29:15 computer playing RuneScape and he was blasting it was the backwards got the key to the cater yep so I come I hear him rapping so I'm like yeah I'm gonna grab my camera just film him like whatever so I creep downstairs and I'm filming Keith and he's like rapping or whatever and then he he's told me that he heard someone in the house and I remember him grabbing a knife that happened to be right next to him for some reason I had put it down because I was always down there so you put it down there in the event that someone broke in yeah that kind of makes sense so he thought he heard someone come in the
Starting point is 00:29:55 house but he didn't react like he thought it was like he was just he probably grabbed it just to be like you know there's probably not anyone there but whatever he grabs a knife turn around saw me and like whoa you like because you're a fucking idiot Joe that was the whole video yeah we had him throw the fucking knife at you which had a bunch of sketches you I'd be mortified to watch I want to watch them I want to watch them but I don't want anyone I want to watch right now we did another one where it was the World Cup like freekicks oh yeah is it oh we did it with your friend Sean yeah but you did another
Starting point is 00:30:34 one we did another one at night where you were like oh the Italian guy the cannoli we I can't I cannot explain we did like World Cup freekicks and like as like each it was in theory probably significantly racist yeah and I was the Italian kicker and I ran up and and I didn't tell Joey I was gonna do this but right before I kicked I yelled cannolis I fucking lost and we like what I mean like we were panting we couldn't breathe that's how hard we were laughing I couldn't even tell you why I don't I don't know why I was old and then no dying do you remember when you guys when Keith swung as hard as he couldn't hit
Starting point is 00:31:16 me in the stomach with a broom handle yes and he left that mark across my stomach for yeah and by the way this is before we drank yeah we're all sober we were all sober I was sober till 21 so imagine what would have happened yeah if we had indulged in alcohol and it would have been bad but Jesus we need we need to pull those I need to see those just to solidify how awful I was I can only I don't know how to I have a verdict I have a I mean I need a wire we used to play it through the TV the TV but with the AV jacks not the AV jacks the no the AV jacks the analog jacks AV is a sound dude but I was involved yeah but
Starting point is 00:32:03 we we used to just make these videos all day and then at night plug them into the TV and watch them and we would be so proud oh man bread and butter little bit of bread we for some reason sang about bread and butter and then we gave this girl that I went to school with for her she thought it was the funniest thing in the world yeah so for her birthday how did she even see it we showed her remember her and another unnamed person came to hang out and we showed him those we showed it to them like we were so proud yeah and would you stop doing that Jesus do you have something to say Keith yeah keep waving over like I have something to
Starting point is 00:32:48 say all right just say it with the dropkick to the nuts oh the guillotine no I know what you're saying and why the fuck would you bring that up that's why I was saying so I fucking say it maybe do that but for her birthday we Joey and I got like a nice pair of shoes but like just the box from like one of our friends and then in it we put like three slices of bread and like that's all and we put butter on it and she was like it's the funny thing everything I remember that I don't know why we did that when he was sitting at the table and then really fast ran away oh and I was sick and I had this like the spit come out of my
Starting point is 00:33:27 mouth remember because I was reading that was I remember everything I that was when Corey Lytle the Yankees pitcher flew his helicopter into the building in Manhattan it was a plane it was a plane mini plane helicopter tomato tomato and I remember I was reading it and I put it down and I looked at the camera and I ran away and they were just like this huge spit yeah oh that was awful dude I love the Keith videos too oh yeah okay I've got a bone to pick with it if you are listening Dylan Alibrandi if you are listening you have Keith too all right so let's give some let's give some context behind right wait my so our
Starting point is 00:34:08 friends went to we all kind of went to different high schools but specifically Frankie and Nick and Dylan you guys went to Brian High School and there was a video class where you had to make a video for your final project and the first year I think was Nick and he had to make a video and he knew that me and Frankie were making these things that we called the 48 Street files by the way 48 Street is like the park that we all met and used to hang out with all the time so we call them the 48 Street files and Nick knew that me and Frankie were making those videos he's like hey can you guys help me help him meaning we did
Starting point is 00:34:43 the whole fucking thing remember that he did one scene and then he just fucking left for a barbecue he did he did the scene where he runs with the camera and looks up and sees you and that was it yeah we did everything so Keith has always been an anomaly to all of us like Keith has been like the like the ghost like he's the untouchable like he has always been like our Amazon God we just never we were still to this day trying to understand Keith so Nick was like we want to make a movie about Keith we want to make it a horror movie I was like a perfect call it kill everyone in the house which is but everyone in the
Starting point is 00:35:20 house it was like yo that's the greatest thing I'm so we made Keith into a murderer dude I have one of them and it's on YouTube first one it's on YouTube what the third one is great I have the third one on my computer me too where you want me and you at the end of where the credits are going that was Dylan where you go through the like the beginning credits and then I don't know what you're here balls yeah we were doing it we didn't know how to loop music at that point in time yeah so we opened it up with like Keith's like the opening credits is Keith going through his daily life to the stone oh wait hold on
Starting point is 00:35:59 no before that though you hear like the I forgot what the song is called yeah like in every typical TV show like the morning the waking up but we showed that like the clock at 5.59 but we hid I mean we didn't really do a good job of hiding them but we plugged little things into the thing we're like let's see what we can get away with you playing in a classroom so that music is playing and I think it was either me or you but someone's just like oh this music so gay yeah and then once it hits 6 a.m. on the on the clock the Stone Cold theme song and his eyes breaks pop open Keith's eyes open and then he's like
Starting point is 00:36:46 walking around doing whatever he gets into the shower his ass is out yeah he's butt naked and don't forget first porno yeah basically so this was I did the second one for my class my senior year of high school and it was K E I T H kill everyone else in the house yeah the sequel obviously which is the best one it's like the godfather trilogy the first one's good the second one's the best the third one sucks yeah the one with a shower getting late tonight Dylan has it I need to get it from him he sent me a picture not too long ago of him with it dude with the zombies and and I'll go there right after this to get it
Starting point is 00:37:23 I will too and we what was I lost my training thought I don't know you said it was oh and then number three was cut three the E was a three and it was called Keith the end yeah and it was just awful but it was the fun we had the most fun making it and we literally said like we want to see how far we can push the boundaries so in my we needed to do a screenplay to prep for it and I did it with two of my friends at the time Lawrence and Dennis and I was like yo let's see how much we can get away with this screenplay so in my screenplay there's like full-on cursing yeah it's like yo you fucking bitch and I turned
Starting point is 00:38:03 it into my teacher and I still have it at my house and she gave it back to me and she like circled it and she just wrote next to it no like at one point I was like Impey and Lawrence are sitting on the stoop drinking juice and then in like quotations it says juice is a beer can cut with us posted over the word beer that says juice oh my god we really like yeah how we didn't get like suspended or in trouble for that was beyond and then you guys came to my showing of it yeah that was great too but first of all I remember the first video we did we're like this is for a class like we can't curse or whatever so
Starting point is 00:38:38 no one cursed and in the second scene our friend David's in it I'm like yo no cursing the first thing he does is he's supposed to react shocked to something goes oh shit like dude what the fuck man you can't curse we decided to keep it in because we're like we're not doing it again he's running he's going yeah but that's where he was cursing is he was running with the camera pointed down he was like fuck yeah yeah oh my god remember you're like alright everyone get out of the scene we're behind the pool but we're standing up yeah I'm like oh well in the third one we're like suppose it's supposed to be like a saw
Starting point is 00:39:12 contraption we're like Dylan's locked in a in a dog kennel yeah first of all he was actually terrified to be in that dog yeah he was not he must be claustrophobic or something because he was seriously afraid and then like as we're doing it you see my feet in the background you hear all our friends outside the garage door good times I have that video though and I could like upload it I have it I have it on my computer too and then it's still on YouTube I just private it and it's it we needed privatized and then we knew whatever we it needed to be a certain length so we did the third one for Dylan like entirely literally we
Starting point is 00:39:51 stayed up until like 6 a.m. doing it right and it needed to be like 10 minutes long so for the last three minutes it's just Joey and I sitting on my couch lip-singing get low by little John inside boys yeah and then the bum-dumb the credits are rolling and it's like we did every credit like produced by directed by starring shot by you know best boy old grip yeah like he grip all that stuff and it was just him and I just our name is just our names for everything that was so funny man we just did the entire thing you know I saw the first one you remember the first one where I'm in the
Starting point is 00:40:33 middle and everyone's stopping me out yeah that's the third one yeah not that that was the first one no the first one is when we're all standing with you and then freaking goes you should just kill yourself yeah well no when in the third one when we're stomping on you people are saying and any like just like you lose her and then Nick himself is just screaming at him needle dick and then also here's your head looks like a light bulb your head looks like a light bulb what are you doing I gotta upload that again so people can see it how that was good but I remember the first yeah yeah Yanis I remember the first one we filmed
Starting point is 00:41:17 like everyone standing in my driveway and I was like and we can't edit so I was like yo guys just stand there I'm gonna film you and then we're gonna and then I'm gonna rewind the tape and then we're gonna film over it but Keith get out of the scene and be up top so it's like he transported up there and we did that but it looks so bad like you know it was so fucking funny it was literally it's the prime example of like the cheapest best thing ever created I still have Jerry I still have the camera and I have a bunch of tapes if I find the cords just so we could watch them oh my god it's the only by the hello the
Starting point is 00:41:58 internet there's everything on the internet I don't know what the fuck the cords called I mean just look at the like the actual model of the thing and it'll probably tell you yeah they don't fucking make the model but they I'm sure easy but you just need to get like an AV to AV or so I had one lost one axe Chelsea for her cord took it lost that mom probably threw it out yeah those don't have them those things are gold mines yeah I'm afraid of what's on there so I really want to see I really want to see the light show though there's so much wrestling on them oh my way too much oh yeah you wrestled for like an
Starting point is 00:42:34 hour hey man we we could go back oh just walk me right you yeah my the bus driver shard turns you were the bus driver so we would wrestle and then we would do jump cuts to us being the announcers and announcing the fight that we're fighting like we would be everyone in it and we like he's just hold the camera and we used to like hold on do you remember where we did like a fucking it was like a Steve Irwin type thing oh I had the I had a beer bomb I had a beer funnel I had a funnel and no yeah it was a funnel because it was it was your brothers yeah it was one of those things you blow a fucking thing no no no it was
Starting point is 00:43:27 a beer you blow a fire with Elizabeth Swan parts of Caribbean what's up got you so it was a beer funnel and I was holding like the end that you would normally have your mouth and then I was holding up the other end and screaming as loud as loud as I could and I was this is before I hit puberty so I can get loud it was it was really like deafening yeah it was like a blood-curdling screen and and what was cool is that the end of the funnel where it had like the actual funnel piece yeah when you would point it at someone it would direct all the sound to them so like he would loud as fuck I couldn't contain myself I was
Starting point is 00:44:10 laughing so hard I'm I'm keeled over crying laughing and Joey's standing over me and I was like apparently the animal like he was like we're fine a wild whatever and I just started screaming it's like you can hear it and then he hold on it gets up and he's I screamed in his face he fell down before that what do you remember what I'm chasing after him and he's going up the stairs and I appear up the stairs with the door that I fall down and I actually fell out of here yeah what was it where we filmed like a commercial in your room oh with Viagra Viagra oh one two three we were like we did a Viagra commercial for
Starting point is 00:44:53 some pill I don't know if we called the Viagra if it was something else I don't remember but we we had like we've like we were showing the stages of what the pill does and one was just regular what Frankie looks like and then second we made a click at a boner and then three we just stuffed an entire tigger a tigger bear and I was like it was like one two three and I was like yeah this is what it does and I remember at one point I said like my name was Jake and I was like haha I'm just Josh and you know I'm not my name is Jake I do wow how do you remember that I just remember this stuff oh my god everything yeah I have to you
Starting point is 00:45:29 know I know what we're doing for the rest of the fucking night yeah I'm gonna try and find that cord someone has to have one oh my god Greg Greg has one if we see how they does if we can get this on the internet cuz that's what we wanted to do originally remember like when we first started this was before YouTube before like the most Internet that we had access to is like we would go on like Nickelodeon.com and Cartoon Network and play the stand candy Stan wow yeah funny golf funny junk calm funny junk E-bomb world.
Starting point is 00:45:59 E-bomb's world. I said that word like a, E-pop world. E-pe-pe-pop. Pea-de-pop. Pea-de-pop-pop. Pea-de-pop-pop. Ping-pong world.
Starting point is 00:46:06 And Stick Figure Death Theater. Oh! Oh, shit! SFDT. Yo! My shit though was Addicting Games. Oh, I love the Addicting Game. It's still Addicting.
Starting point is 00:46:17 Yo, Stick Figure Death Theater. And I remember your computer was so crap and it was in your parents' room that when we would go on Funny Junk, it would be like joking, ha-ha, joke, joke, joke, tits. And it would just freeze on the tits and we'd have to restart the whole computer.
Starting point is 00:46:31 Oh my God. Yeah, good times. What bad kids we were at the age of 12, looking at boobs. Oh no. Sorry. And does it world? Oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:39 We were just going, what about the Super Mario Brothers? Fuck the Kegaroos. Remember Super Mario Brothers? Remember the ABC? Oh my God. ABC. Next time won't you?
Starting point is 00:46:48 Next time won't you suck my dick, motherfucker? Yeah, I'm a fuck you brother. That's how it ended. That's where we first heard the ABC. Next time won't you suck my dick? Yeah, it was like a little ball of sunshine and he was like,
Starting point is 00:47:04 A-B-B-E-G. What were other ones that we used to watch on there? That's where the heavy set kid was doing the Mayahi, Mayaha, that's where that started. Also remember, you could call him fat, it's fine. Jesus, you're not on CNN. I remember. Heavy set, big bone kid.
Starting point is 00:47:24 Gurthi. I remember that was the first time, I think the first video I ever saw on Funny Junk was a ding, fries are done, ding, fries are done. I've got to run, I've got to run. Those are, these are glasses. Family guy made fun of it. Yeah, I work at Baker King making paper whoppers.
Starting point is 00:47:43 I wear paper hat. I remember that. Would you like an apple pie with dick? I feel like there's going to be a lot of people like, I don't understand the last 40 minutes of this podcast. Guys, if you can. Just Gony Bob World. I'm sorry for reminiscing the entire time.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Gony Bob World search, the ABC song, was it End of the World? End of the World, Super Mario Brothers. I don't remember what it was called, but it was like, shout it out, shout it out, shout it out, shout it out. I remember that. Tico, tico, tico. No, tico, tico, tico.
Starting point is 00:48:16 What else? I'm trying to look up the ABC, oh my God, this is it. I'm gonna play it. Oh my God, he's such a nice looking guy. He's a stick figure. Look at him, he's so happy. Yeah! What, what, what?
Starting point is 00:48:40 Hey. I know my ABC, now I know my ADP, once you come here. Fuck my dick, fuck your dick, fuck your dick, fuck your dick, come on, I don't fuck you up, right? Oh my God. Riceless. When you see that, when you're fucking 10 years old, it's the best.
Starting point is 00:48:59 Yeah. Or was that on there, the fucking Sesame Street when they're all high? Wow. We're gonna do this all fucking night. I can tell already. I forgot that one. What comes after eight?
Starting point is 00:49:15 Crack pipe, we're shit like that. You guys don't know, I'm so hot here. Crack pipe. All right, we're at 50 minutes here, we're gonna wrap it up and then just continue. We're gonna, we should go back and, you know, find, first of all, I need a charger, that's the big thing. I need a charger for that camera.
Starting point is 00:49:36 Oh yeah. And then I need to find the other. She's so sexual. I love chargers. Oh yeah. Oh shit. All right. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:49 Oh yeah. Anyway, Keith, where can they find you, if they want to contact you? They can find me at. They can find him in the gutter. You find me on the block, there's a pain in love. Hey. Real G, throw bread from the street,
Starting point is 00:50:02 bands hanging with my gun and my drug. Gotta keep on moving. There you go, Keith, where can they find you? You can find me at Keith Sanagato on Twitter, Instagram, and I have a gaming channel on YouTube. YouTube, what was it? www.youtube.com. You don't have to say www, it's not 1998.
Starting point is 00:50:20 HTTP colon, backslash, backslash. Yes, it's YouTube slash Keith Sanagato. There you go. And Frank, where can they find you? Twitter, frank underscore alvarez80, Instagram f alvarez underscore 80. And I also run a wrestling podcast with our friend Nick, and big into wrestling,
Starting point is 00:50:42 I love wrestling, I think I said that here before. We're called the squared circle jerks. Yeah. Come straight out of Sanagato Studios, the number one podcast for wrestling in your heart. And you can find us on Twitter at scjpod. Awesome, and that is all, and thanks for listening, ya motherfuckers.

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