The Bechdel Cast - The Holiday with Rebecca Bulnes
Episode Date: December 14, 2017Caitlin and Jamie have been unlucky in love this holiday season, so they decide to switch houses, and it somehow fixes everything! They invite special guest Rebecca Bulnes over to celebrate and watch ...The Holiday! (This episode contains spoilers)For Bechdel bonuses, sign up for our Patreon at patreon.com/bechdelcast. Follow @AlmondMilkHotel on Twitter! While you're there, you should also follow @BechdelCast, @caitlindurante and @hamburgerphone Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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start changing it with the Bechdel cast hello welcome to the Bechdel cast my name is Jamie
my name's Caitlin this is the Bechdel cast and we're going really fast we're going really fast
oh god I'm like fully fast okay can I just say
I just went to 7-Eleven obviously
and I did eat a piece of pizza
on the way back I was so upset
I got the Mike's
Harder Lemonade Cranberry
that's my current flavor that I'm into
and I went to the
front and I did not have
my ID and she was just like
sorry you couldn't get it
no i didn't i you see no my card before you there's none and i'm personally i was
how can i not have a mike's hard lemonade to do this particular episode you know right because
this is a movie that you're gonna want to drink about because... Yeah, I'm very excited.
Anyways, yeah, if anyone wants to just send letters of sympathy,
I'm personally very upset.
Who knows when I'm going to get to drink a Mike's Hard Lemonade now.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I'm honestly furious, and nothing is okay.
Everything's in complete disarray.
Sure.
You're injured. This is a disaster. Yeah, I fell playing soccer yesterday. Everything is in complete disarray. Sure. How are you? You're injured.
This is a disaster.
Yeah, I fell playing soccer yesterday.
This is a fucking disaster.
And I'm scraped up like a little kid.
We're in bad shape today.
Things are really not going well.
I, like, have taken two showers but still somehow smell like a plane.
Like, it's just like, I think we're all out of sorts.
Well, hey, maybe we'll get back
on track in our lives with this episode of cinema yeah yeah so let's introduce our guest
oh i'm so excited to have her i just i full disclosure i just recorded an episode of her
amazing podcast i know crush ever heard of it. She's also written for the A.V. Club.
Rebecca Bolnick.
Hi.
What's up?
Oh, my God.
I wrote about you and now I'm here.
I am God.
I did it.
You manifested.
We manifested.
It was a mute manifest.
A mute manifest.
That's what I live for.
That's how I make anything happen my scream up
it's also the name of the man who does my taxes very nice um mute manifest
and guys this is how comedy works right here yeah that's what it is where character happened
there yeah we just made mute manifest and associates here's something i've been doing
recently that really throws people for a loop is if you introduce your friend as like this is an
associate of mine and they'll be like oh like they're it suddenly implies like a level of
business to your friendship that simply does not exist okay we should go around calling each other
our associates my business yeah you don't actually don't say business say associate yeah let's figure it out yeah they're like oh how are you guys
associating because that's all it means we've associated which we have yeah pretty blatantly
yeah i think at least on the record that you've associated yeah there's there's too much of a
trail to be able to erase the fact that we have at many points associated at least on at least 50
occasions we've associated yeah at least once a week for the past year so right so like what's
the end game what's the plan we don't know we'll find out hey let's talk about a movie okay so
rebecca you've brought us the holiday yes you also overruled the movie we suggested for the holiday
okay because here's the thing i was into the idea but then i was watching the holiday. Okay, because here's the thing. I was into the idea, but then I was watching the holiday
with myself, with wine,
on Thanksgiving,
and I was like,
wow, I mean, the holiday, right, guys?
Right here.
So I did have to pitch it
because...
I'm thrilled you did.
I'm glad.
I mean, I've put you through something
with this movie,
but I hope you loved it.
You loved the experience of it.
I'd seen this movie several times. you loved it it was you loved the experience i'd seen
this movie several times yeah i i had not can is going to be very dramatic basically caitlin plus
rom-com is like me plus any movie with like a robot in it i'm just like god i'm exhausted the
thing is did i know that yes yeah did i did i Was I fully aware of how this would go a little bit?
Not like in a predictable way, but I was like, yeah, that could be fun.
Well, I loved hating it.
We'll say that.
Yeah.
It's a fun bad.
I had a great time hating it.
It really is.
I mean, and watching it, I mean, I feel like there's so many red flags with this movie.
Even when you're not watching it for its treatment of women.
It's just a gigantic.
There's so.
OK, let's.
OK, so wait, when did you first see The Holiday?
OK, so I have like a long history of The Holiday just watching it with my mom.
It's very much a me and my mom movie.
Her like one is Jude Law.
She's she loves to talk about how she would cheat on my stepdad with jude law like
and growing up i was i thought it was really cool so because i was like um i'm into bam margera
so i'm gonna call jude law judy law because i was like i would make fun of her because i was like oh
wow he's like a pretty boy and of course now i'm like i would do anything to fuck jude law
right like he's beautiful of course with j have a lot of issues with Jude Law.
But yeah, so I've seen it like many, many times.
We always watch it in the holiday season.
And I can't stop.
And it's a part of me.
And there are like specific lines that like I have the line delivery
like in my head ingrained.
Oh, that's big.
Yeah, I'll mention them when they come up.
So yeah, I've seen it many, many times and um most of it's for jack black okay jack black who by the way this movie
could not want you to know that it does not find jack black attractive anymore that first
fucking shot where they're like clearly love it's blind you're just like what the fuck why would he be god yeah i was so
on jack black's side until i was very suddenly like wait a second he's cheating on his girlfriend
yeah why is this there's a lot and so wait you saw this movie for the first time yeah like a
couple days ago and i went into it pretty much assuming that I was not going to enjoy it and turns out
I was right. You know yourself.
I know myself baby.
Well I had known about this movie
since it came out in like 2006
and you know it's the movie where
Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet switch houses
during Christmas time and
Novel pre-Airbnb.
Right. Fun.
I love an early internet movie right right oh my god which
also features a blockbuster movie scene oh my god with the dustin hoffman cameo oh yeah that
didn't go anywhere they're just like yikes also jack black's character who's like a film composer
like has the most basic taste he's like humming gone with the wind this is like um
what a little what a little basic bitch in terms of his knowledge of his own profession
yeah well when had you uh first seen the movie jamie oh uh probably within a year of it coming
out i want to say this movie i think came out when i was in like middle school and so it was like perfect in terms of like this
is something me and my mom can watch together that's like not too raunchy yeah but it's also
like girl yeah like yeah it sounds like a similar deal where I first saw it with my mom and then
it's never been like one of my favorite favorites but I remember my first Christmas in LA the first
Christmas I didn't go home I met up with a bunch of friends. We all watched the holiday.
I went to a
Christmas party yesterday afternoon and
this movie was playing on the TV
and I didn't know anyone there except for the host
and I just loudly announced how much I hate
this movie and everyone's like, oh god,
who's that?
I was instantly hated by everyone
there. Well, you can't just
talk about the holiday like that, to be fair.
You can't just do that.
I like how it does just elicit such a visceral reaction while not actually being good.
Right.
I get it.
I do.
I really do.
Well, let me do the recap.
Please.
So the holiday is about Cameron Dia diaz and kate winslet they've
both been unlucky in love uh and they're also doing this movie for sort of everyone involved
is a victory lap of sorts like no one's here to make history although i will say it is an
actor's film so not a tone poem it's more of an actor no i think. So not a tone poem? It's more of an actor's film? No, I think it's also a tone poem.
Okay.
And there's certain parts of it
have a lot of horny depth
and other parts of it do not.
But it is an actor's film
and a tone poem.
Got it, okay.
Right.
I'd also just like to add
really using voiceover
for what it's meant to be.
You know, just very much like
that's like the tone of all of the voiceover it's like i am
fucking acting i'm kate winslet i am acting here's the movie but she's also giving it 75
in the voiceover she's not giving it her all she's saving her all for the reader or whatever
other movie she was in that came out around this time she can't be giving this
movie a hundred percent just to conserve her energy although i will say i was fully triggered
by her um what is it that she plays air guitar to oh my god what's the song she plays air guitar
in the stew okay wait i remember with the scene oh it's very guitar oh to a jet song yeah are you gonna be my girl right inexplicably just playing
air guitar in cameron diaz's bed because she's thrilled about the fact that it's it seems i
wasn't sure the context of the scene but she woke up and it was day and then a jet song turned on
excited and she just like was like i i can't not no no and she even goes she goes thank you amanda like she's right because
she like had that selection imagine bonding with another woman because it's like oh you love jet
i love jets one song
oh god and in 2006 this would have been a lot of work to program this into your alarm clock.
Like, you couldn't just wake up to Jet.
Oh, sure.
Yeah.
She was rich.
And so she could wake up to Jet.
She was so rich.
And she house shamed Kate Winslet for having a small house.
You know, when they're like,
Who had a huge fucking house?
But she's just like,
My house, well, it's a little bit bigger than yours not that that's
hard and it's like you bitch don't house shame her okay really quick before we i know we're okay
but who do you of the four who do you hate the most uh camera diaz i yeah but i also
i mean normally i think i would hate you say jude law i that's the obvious answer
but it might be jack black i know i wouldn't have said this but this time he's he's cheating
on his girlfriend and then he's like why did my girlfriend he catches his girlfriend cheating on
him while he's also cheating on his girlfriend. Taking another woman out on a date. And then goes home and he's like, sucks out there.
I'm such a nice guy.
Like, it's just infuriating.
It's, okay, sorry.
Well, that and then Jack Black can't not just like mug for, he can't act.
This is your problem with Jack Black that everyone loves about him and I love it.
I'm very, but because.
I love when he's mugging in this movie.
I love when he's every part.
Every time. The only time, the only reason they made him like a musicging in this movie. I love when he's every part, every time.
The only reason they made him a music supervisor in this movie
is so he could do his little...
Scoodle-do-do.
Scoodle-do-do.
I was like, this is the most romantic scene he's in in this entire movie.
Jude Law is constantly panting, just covered in sweat.
Fuck, boy, man.
You say that Jack Black is not a bad actor,
but I just have to point you
to the line
delivery that is one of the funniest
things is it is officially
crazy weather. Do you know that scene?
It makes me laugh
every fucking time. Do you know how
it wasn't that funny when I did it? It's because
Jack Black is just really he just does this thing. He does this face. It's so funny. And I'm like, you know how it wasn't that funny when I did it? It's because Jack Black is just really,
he just does this thing, he does this face,
it's so funny.
And I'm like, you know what, it is crazy weather,
and that's hilarious.
I'm sorry, I just had to point that out.
Some of Jack Black's line reads in this movie
are baffling, where there's that scene,
okay, first of all, this movie,
it's too long.
It's so, it's like two hours and 40.
It's like a Lord of the Rings movie.
It's so long.
I forgot how long.
Yeah.
And there's certain scenes that you're just like, yeah, I'd lose that.
What is that doing there?
The whole B-plot with the old man.
Lose it.
Literally, there is absolutely no purpose for it.
Kate Winslet spends so much of the movie falling in love with that old man.
Yeah. It's so weird. Well, falling in love with that old man. Yeah.
It's so weird.
Well, I guess he wants her to have gumption.
He needs to tell her to be a strong woman.
I don't know.
That's a thing.
God.
Yeah.
That whole,
and then like all this weird old Hollywood.
I'm like,
who is this for?
It's very unnecessary.
It was very weird.
So there's the old man,
but there's one part where
I guess the plot needs to justify
Jack Black constantly hanging out with Kate Winslet in spite of the fact that he, like just make him not have a girlfriend. Write that up. weird so there's the old man but there's one part where i guess the plot needs to justify jack black
constantly hanging out with kate winslet in spite of the fact that he like just make him not have a
girlfriend write that up that's easy yeah whatever but he comes over because he's cameron diaz's ex
boyfriend's friend colleague yeah yeah associate it's eddie burns eddie burns eddie burns who
delivers some choice exposition in the beginning.
He's just basically, here are all your issues.
You can't be in relationships.
And then says, not my fault.
Bye.
So Jack Black comes over and she's like, sorry, this old person I met wants to have a Hanukkah dinner because Los Angeles, I don't know, unclear.
So Jack Black's like, yeah, I want to join in.
And it's like, okay.
But then Jack Black joins the party and gives some of the most insane,
the way Jack Black talks to old people in this movie is crazy.
Like he talks like he's like a wizard to old people.
Like he's like, oh, I'll be giving you a call to play parcheese he's social oh god social
butterfly he's condescending to the elderly i loved it i love i mean that said i loved it and
i love jack black and i'm a big jack black defender his character shouldn't have been
chiana's girlfriend though i was fucked up His character is the first person you see on screen.
Why?
Why?
Here's the thing.
Not only that he's, like, the first person you see, it's, like, I feel like he doesn't
actually come back until, like, 45 minutes into the movie.
A long time.
Like, they really wait to actually.
And Jude Law doesn't show up for a long time, too.
Which is, like, yeah, I guess it's about the two women but like still like kate to the
poster kate and yeah i know but honestly i feel like all of the jack black stuff happens fully
like in the third act like fully it's it's like okay remember the guy from the beginning who
he seems fun we said he looked like remember the guy who said looked like shit at the beginning
of the movie we're gonna bring him back now and now he's gonna be dating kate winslet like that's oh doesn't doesn't and i and i'd argue biggest problem with the film is that there's actually
not enough jack black is what i would say i'm on board with that no i disagree i think it's
totally unbalanced movie i'm only not super annoyed by him in this movie because he has
so little screen time see i would say replace all the weird old man stuff with like kate winslet and jack black doing something because i wallach or r.i.p though
yeah her just paradise but what were you doing or just like out pursuing a personal endeavor of hers
or like i mean we'll get into this but like the two storylines of cameron diaz's character and
kate winslet's character are just like how their lives are framed
around the men that they know
and or are trying to get over
or the new men that they're getting involved with.
It's just like, what about any other part of your life?
Oh, no.
I mean, in the beginning,
Kate Winslet's like real upset because Jasper, right?
Jasper, her like love boy who is now getting engaged.
I forgot about this until I rewatched it recently.
She's so devastated, and she's, like, crying like a child.
And there's, like, a casual, like, suicide attempt joke, I guess.
Like, not even.
She, like, turns the gas on, and she, like, almost considers it.
She starts to breathe it in.
She almost fully plasts out, and you're just like, what is happening?
That's, like, in the first in the first 10 minutes of the movie.
Because yeah, she goes from sobbing...
This is so much.
This is so much. I have a hundred pages of notes
for this. I know, and we're not
going to be able to get to it all.
Was Paul Rudd in this movie for like two seconds?
No, you're thinking you have John Krasinski
and Catherine Hahn.
I noticed John Krasinski.
I thought I saw Paul.
I thought like Paul Rudd had to be in every.
I thought he had to be in every movie between 2005 and 2014.
That wasn't his contract.
Or he would die.
I thought I saw him.
Maybe I didn't.
I don't think so.
Yeah, I guess he would have made himself known, right?
He's a famous person.
But just to go over the story super quickly.
So Cameron Diaz, whose character's name is Amanda,
and Kate Winslet, whose character's name is Iris,
they switch houses because they've both been like, oh, I found out the guy I was in love with just got engaged.
Or, oh, my live-in boyfriend, Ed Burns, is cheating on me.
The Christmas holiday is coming up, and they're like, what if I just get away from it all?
So they decide to switch houses because they need it on the internet.
This, I think, is a good premise for a movie.
Yes, but I would argue that it makes
no sense for it to be set
at Christmas time. In fact,
I feel like it was... Yeah, like do they not have
families at all? Yeah, that
was something that never comes up.
And then also, Kate Winslet, we find
out later in a weird twist,
has two adorable nieces that she
doesn't talk about right
and totally bails on
and they don't have a mom
this is like
their first
like one of their first
Christmases without a mom
she's like actually
I'm really bummed out
like
gotta get out of here
kind of selfish guys
I have a theory
that the first draft
of this script
was not set
at Christmas time
but then they got
like a studio note
they're like
well let's make it
a Christmas movie
because at no point
do they celebrate Christmas or
any of the holidays really. We don't see most of Christmas.
And a bunch of things happen that it makes
no sense for it to be set at Christmas time
like the WGA tribute
to Arthur and his career
they're like yeah this is on Christmas day
Why is the WGA a major plot
point in this movie? I don't know.
I don't get it.
I haven't seen this movie? I don't know. I don't get it. The whole, I totally forgot.
I haven't seen this movie in, I think, two years before last night.
And I completely forgot the old man.
I was like, oh, yeah.
And then you're like, but wait, this movie, this part takes up 45 minutes?
Why?
You know what it is?
It's because this movie is actually a movie for, like, fans of cinema, you know?
It's a love letter to writing. it's a love letter to writing it's
a love letter to writing and right it's a screenwriter's film it's a director's film
grow up like we can't do this for a movie that talks about screenwriting a lot um not great
writing no not and i feel bad for hating this movie so much because it was written and directed by a woman, Nancy.
You know what?
She's had some hits.
She did a bad job.
Okay, so Nancy Meyers' film Ouvre.
There's a lot.
There's one of my faves, Parent Trap 98.
Dennis Quaid, Wet.
Something's Gotta Give.
I have not seen that. What want with mel gibson yikes uh
where mel gibson reads women's minds uh the holiday it's complicated the intern like it's
good that she has a job however with the exception of parent Trap 98, what? Maybe her body of work isn't very good?
Listen, I think it's the ultimate feminism to be able to declare another woman mediocre.
Sure.
It's haven't we achieved equality where we can be like, you know what?
I don't care for it.
If you're going to have to censor your opinions about Nancy for feminism, is it feminism?
I don't think so.
No, I don't think so.
Right, exactly. There we we go you know what nancy
you've you've you did a great job but also i've seen this movie more than most movies in my life
this so many times i i do genuinely like i don't i don't know if i can say i like the holiday after
this viewing but i think i still like the holiday like I know I'll watch it again
I don't know what that says about me
I'm trying to think like what else plot wise is it
so Iris lives in
Surrey, England
and
Amanda lives
in LA and they decide to switch houses
so at a moment's notice
because even though it's you know
five days before christmas
their tickets would have been thousands of dollars they both seem to have limitless means it seems
to me yeah and kate winslet as a wedding writer it's just it's just like right yeah cool sure
you're a millionaire so it doesn't make any sense so they switch houses to escape from the love
situations that are plaguing them,
the romantic entanglements that they want to get away from.
Yeah, and Cameron Diaz really spells it out.
She says, I have to ask, is there any men in your town?
And then Kate Winslet types back, zero.
You know, because she actually lives on Themyscira,
the island at the beginning of Wonder Woman,
where it's just a bunch of Amazon women and no men.
So that's a fun plot twist
that none of us saw coming.
Okay, so Amanda shows up
in England, and she's
there for a while, and then she's like, oh, I'm
bored. I better drink some wine.
And then who comes knocking at her door?
Desland wine.
Who comes knocking at her door
but Jude Law
Iris's
hot brother
and he's like
oh wow
oh hi
that's exactly
what he said
hello
and then
one thing leads
to another
in the five minutes
that they interact
and then suddenly
they have sex
meanwhile
Iris is
in LA
and then she
befriends an old man and then kind of dates jack black
yeah that's pretty much so weird like and then the last scene of the movie they all go back to
sorry yeah for new year's makes zero sense to me the last i it i never thought about it before
this viewing of like what an uncomfortable okay cameron diaz and jude law who is kate winslet's brother and
then cameron diaz's ex-boyfriend's friend slash associate slash associate who's flown across the
world to be at a new year's party and also there's children i hate that there's children involved i
feel bad for all the kids okay Okay, all I have is questions.
Jude Law leaves his children on Christmas Eve
to fuck Cameron Diaz?
Yes.
Yeah.
Who are they with?
He mentions grandparents.
I appreciate that.
I mean, though he does say,
I am daddy in this film,
which shout out Fran Hoffner
for really pointing that out
and making that an internet moment.
He does say, I am daddy. i am daddy um is is he a
good daddy well i don't know i mean he's going through his shit his wife done died but like a
year ago two years two years and he seems to be stealing away to fuck random women yeah he goes
to a bar all the time he says he's He's like, oh, when I find myself
at the local pub
all drunk
and like not able
to get home.
I crash at my sister's house.
It's like,
this is very sad.
Yeah.
This is, okay, okay.
Here's a scene
to hone in on.
Every scene
with Cameron Diaz
and Jude Law
is fucking bananas.
Can I just say one thing
about Cameron Diaz
right now?
Like, I think we just
do need to say it
is that,
wow,
what's happening?
She is,
like,
overacting is an understatement.
She is so bad.
She kind of is
like a high schooler
in a place,
she's like,
bleh,
bleh, bleh, bleh.
She's full on senior year.
It's wild.
Gunning for an award.
Yeah.
And like,
not charming.
It's like,
not charming at all.
It's irritating as hell. It's so annoying. It's like not charming at all. It's irritating.
It's so annoying. It's a lot.
And it's, oh god.
And Kate Winslet's pushing it with the whole
jet sequence. Yeah. But you can tell
that wasn't her idea.
The way that I look at it is that like Cameron Diaz
is like trying to act. Kate Winslet's
just having fun.
She's just like, you know, I would love
you know, her kids need to go to college or
whatever exactly cameron diaz seems to be the only person in this movie who's taking the movie
weirdly serious like she's like this is a big role well this is her like wheelhouse this is
the type of role she always gets cast in and she's living it up she literally like is there's like
another inexplicable minute-long scene of like why why is this here? Where Cameron Diaz drunkenly faces off with a dog
and they do a mug up.
I wrote that down because you know what?
That dog is an actor.
That dog was better than Cameron Diaz.
No, I literally wrote that down.
There are dogs that are better actors than Cameron Diaz.
But just since you brought up Jet,
should we talk about how she jams out to the killers,
Mr. Brightside?
She did.
Mr. Brightside. Yeah,. Yes, Mr. Brightside.
Mr. Brightside.
Yeah, there's, oh, God.
It is the mid-aughts in this movie.
I know.
That's another thing that's like one of the, like I mentioned, one of those things that's
in my brain forever is the way that she sings along to smoking or whatever on your alibi.
I was just like, yeah.
Cameron Diaz, is this a joke to you?
Like, why are you? And I, oh i oh god i can just picture it yeah like
cameron diaz going up to nancy myers and be like i'm gonna try something
and she's like go for it cam and then cam does that fucking thing and she's like cut
love it this movie is six hours long so we have to keep moving oh my god i also forgot these women
talk to themselves so much yeah in this movie yeah i mean and we're coming off a diehard episode
right and it was a lot compared to diehard yeah cameron diaz is monologuing she's god there's so
there's so much um there's oh the first scene in this movie which does at one point pass the vital test
kate winslet where she's just sulking around this christmas party we learn about jasper who's her
boss that she's in love with and he comes over and he's like you're hot and she's like
i got you a present and then she goes goes out. She goes out and then immediately finds out that not only is he getting married,
but she has to write about it for some reason.
But they have an exchange in there where it's just Kate Winslet and Jasper.
We don't need to refer to the main four actors by anything other than their full names.
So Kate Winslet and Jasper are talking in the room.
And the vaguestuest it's a
great vague business conversation where she's like you got a new thing you got promoted and he was
like yeah well it took a lot of work but i couldn't have done it without the work of you as well
and she's like excellent it's like where do they work what is happening this could be anything
we later found out that she and her brother both work in publishing.
Publishing.
A very lucrative business.
Because print is alive and well.
Here's the thing I want to say about Kate Winslet right now, though, is that it's like
a same girl, though, throughout the entire movie.
I'm like, yeah, I get it.
Like, I've had a Jasper.
And yeah, there's a line where he goes like,
like, you're my survival kit.
And I'm like, oh, like, that hurt me.
Because I'm like, wow, same.
That's been there.
There's been there, done that.
I've had a Jasper who's not been as hot as this actual Jasper.
Excellent casting, though, of like,
he can't be as hot as Jude Law, but he's got to be close.
And he's got to look a little evil. with like the same piercing blue eyes but just like a little bit more maybe he's like
not totally symmetrical we don't know yeah yeah there's a little weird thing going on there but
there there there was one point where i because kate winslet is also a horrible character but
there was one point where he sends her his manuscript because he knows she's so good at
her job that that's why he keeps her around because he needs her professionally.
And that was like, well, and then I drown myself in a river.
All right. Well, OK, so I'm just going to the plot of the movie it's about two women who need to escape
the problematic men in their lives so they switch places but there would be an opportunity you think
for a story that would be about like their sort of self-discovery and hey maybe let's pursue
something in my career while i'm away or maybe i'll like
try to write a book or maybe i'll try to make a a friend or something like that but both of
their stories just revolve around other men so they they leave one man just to jump to another
one because cameron diaz is like oh actually ed burns not the guy for me but jude not the guy for me, but Jude Law, the guy for me.
The guy who drunkenly shows up at my house could be
fucking anyone.
And also doesn't appear drunk that entire...
Imagine a man
being like... He's got a little stagger and a little
slur. But drops it pretty
quickly. And then is like, so where do you
work? And you're just like, this man
isn't drunk! What's happening?
Little tiny thing thing you said books
and this just reminded me okay on the plane when she's going to the cottage so many books she has
a stack of like seven books the kite runners there there's harry potter what's your plan what's your
plan you're gonna read all these fucking books you're not gonna read all these fucking books
no way not on this flight not during this trip i do that sometimes though i i'm like wouldn't it be wouldn't it be nice if i did
if i managed to and then you just end up making your home vacation very heavy and you read nothing
so uh cameron diaz's character is just like oh but jude law and he suddenly falls in love with
me even though we've only known each other for a week and they like he's emotional and she's not needs to open up and learn how to cry because her whole thing
is that she hasn't cried since she was 15 fun fun character detail and not to say and not to like
shame you know everyone has their life difficulties but i can't cry but literally but it's like okay
your parents got divorced oh we're so fucking okay, your parents got divorced. Oh, we're so fucking sorry.
Everyone's parents got divorced.
Cool it.
No, literally.
And I can't cry.
I haven't cried in 20 years because my parents got... I'm sorry, I can't do a Cameron Diaz impression.
I'm not that shrill.
I can't do it.
But she is just like, I haven't cried in 20 years.
There was a suitcase.
I was just like, shut up.
I wish her unhappiness.
I love after her and June Law, Bone,
she's like, honestly,
my life's a bit of a mess in that department too.
Don't worry about it.
It's all cool.
And he's all like, whoa, okay.
I guess you're not.
And she's like, no,
I'm not going to fall in love with you.
Blah, blah.
Jude does one of my
favorite things
in the entire
thing
of film
that I like to tell people
sometimes
if I feel comfortable
enough with them
one of the first scenes
he appears in
he's like
don't fall in love
with me
I love that so much
and then he calls back
to you later
he's like
I know I told you
not to fall in love
with me
but now somehow
I have fallen in love with you and you're just like this that ruled okay also he keeps calling her like
he's like he's like really one of the most interesting women i've ever met just say not
like the other girls just say it like also is she she's so she's so not so bland she's so
fucking boring the one moment i connected with cam Diaz's character, and I actually fell for her a little bit.
I feel like I know what it's going to be.
Was when she and Jude Law are about to have sex for the first time,
and she says that she's like, just so you know,
I don't know if I'm good at this.
And I have 100% done that before,
like disclaimed myself before having sex with her.
Just so you know, I have these weird,
wiry nipple hairs that I haven't taken care of.
And I don't know,
it's been pointed out to me before.
And if you've got a problem with it,
I mean,
we can just hang out another day.
So,
and I was like,
in that moment,
I was like,
I'm Cameron Diaz and I don't like it.
But which,
and I don't know,
that was a nice character moment.
No,
I like that too of
course later he's like by the way your ex i'd say he's mistaken also his contacts are knocked out of
his eyes during the sex that's the thing that he does it's literally it's it's only it's only so
they could put him in cute cute glasses you know he's like it's like my my contacts fell out well
you know like well then it's so hot my context for that or she is actually like really just doing some crazy stuff
maybe she thinks she's bad at sex maybe she really is bad at sex
just like give me your eyeballs oh my god but he does wait wait that does remind me of when
what give me give me your eyeballs
sorry no but do you remember when they're sitting when they're on the couch and they're about to do it and he kisses her eyelids and he pulls her hair back?
Here's the thing.
I feel like those are very nice, intimate moves.
That's not like we're drunk and we're strangers and we're going to fuck.
Right, who just met like literally 10 minutes before.
And then he's just like delicately kissing her eyelids.
I'm like, oh my God, literally,
what?
Wait,
I want to talk more about this scene
because I would argue
that there is a surprise kiss.
It's not the type
of surprise kiss
we usually see.
It's not just like a lunge.
But okay,
here's what happens.
So he's at Iris's house
where Cameron Diaz is staying.
They chat for a couple minutes.
They like kind of
get to know who they are.
She's like,
I just broke up with someone.
I'm here and I'm all out of sorts.
And then he's like, all right, I'm just going to crash on the couch.
She goes and gets some blankets and says goodnight.
And then he leans in and kisses her out of nowhere.
Yeah.
Which here's the thing that's weird about that.
I mean, there are multiple things, but it's almost like he did it in a way that it's like, oh, no, this is just i that i it's like i'm a british people just kiss you on the lips good night it's yeah it's like it's
like a routine thing that routine routine i can't say routine routine thing like you're talking like
karen dancing mr francis but then the thing that i thought of was like even if he was he forgot that
like he didn't know her or something it's like oh do you kiss your sister Kate Winslet on the mouth before you go sleep like on her couch
it's just what we do it's just the space reminds me of kissing women even though the woman who
lives here is my sister well okay so then after so even if there is romantic tension between them
which we can argue that there is,
he can't just lean in and kiss her.
There's no flirtation really up to that point.
Well, but also Cameron Diaz is like, I don't do foreplay.
Oh, yeah.
She's so cool.
Cameron Diaz has a lot of things that men want to hear in this movie.
She says, I don't fall in love.
I don't do foreplay.
I can't cry.
Like all this stuff.
I'm just
like wow this really seems like a great person that has never existed he's like foreplay and
she's like overrated he's like you're the most interesting girl that's what makes her interesting
woman in the world but he doesn't call her woman he calls her girl a hundred times in this movie
and never a woman he also uh basically, basically, there's that great feminist icon
Jude Law moment where he's like,
I'm not in the habit of having sex with
women who are unconscious.
And it's like, slow clap.
Wow. And then Cameron Diaz is like,
I'm so embarrassed. I'm like, no,
that's not... Yeah, meanwhile, she's
like, wait, why didn't we have sex? And he's like,
you're in... She's like, really? Oh, man.
She is... Okay. And I know that, you know, know women be crazy is a thing but her character is fully crazy yeah based on the
fact that she is very badly written like nothing she does make sense and then it's cameron diaz it
just sucks back to this surprise kiss scene so after he kisses her he reacts in such a way where
it's like oh whoa like i didn't mean to do that. And then she says, can you try that again?
And he's like, huh?
Okay.
And then he kisses her again.
So the movie frames this weird moment that you don't think would happen in real life.
Or if it does, like it's alarming.
And again, like a surprise kiss.
The movie frames it as like, oh, this is romantic.
And she's so into this.
And like forgetting the fact that they just met
yeah and they hadn't been talking about like maybe they say like oh you're cute you're handsome i'm
glad i i came but like the way like yeah the way that they frame it it's almost like the scene in
the movie where like the two best friends try for the first time you know like it almost seems like
a chemistry read where it's like we've been friends for a long time can we just try this like that's the sort of move that it is
and it makes zero sense because they met three minutes ago yeah she's like wait interesting
interesting that's how but then her whole thing is that it's interesting because
she's never kissed a stranger before and he's like really i do it all the time
whatever he's like meanwhile i have two young girls all the time. Whatever. He's like, meanwhile,
I have two young girls at home,
but I'm out there fucking every night.
He's very straightforward about what a piece of shit he is,
which is also frustrating to me on a Cameron Diaz level where he,
at multiple points in the movie,
lists things that are wrong with him.
Like he is being pretty,
minus the fact that it's a twist that he's a father and somehow that's a good thing.
And also that he cries. Because guess she can't cry and guess what he loves
to cry too much it was just him weeps him weeps so much there's it's oh god Cameron Diaz like no
one can be like my parents divorce and now I'm like this like it just doesn't happen also Kate
Winslet I think is very deeply depressed depressed and really should say thanks for hanging Jack Black,
but I need a new therapist and new medication
because she almost kills herself at the beginning
and really seems prone to some pretty brutal mood swings.
How come Kate Winslet almost commits suicide
in every movie she's in in the beginning
because it happens in Titanic?
Contractual obligation.
Right.
The only other movie she's ever been in.
She almost killed herself. Well, actually, she almost killed herself in Beautiful Creat obligation. Right. The only other movie she's ever been in. She almost killed herself.
Well, actually, she almost killed herself in Beautiful Creatures.
Ooh.
Well, we can do this thing.
Can we talk about Jack Black, perhaps feminist icon, though, for this one moment, this one
scene where he introduces his girlfriend, what the fuck her name was?
Maggie.
Maggie to, and he goes, here's my Maggie.
Well, no, not my maggie whoa yeah
that was i wrote that down like feminist i contact plan
maybe i think so maybe honestly yes so still on kate winslet's story, her whole thing, similar to Cameron Diaz, is that she, oh, Jasper doesn't love her, so she has to get away and escape and get over him.
And she does say several times in the movie, like, it's clear that I need to fall out of love with you.
Please let me do this.
And then he's just like, but how can I reach you every day?
And then he shows.
Fucking piece of shit.
And then by the end of the movie yes she does confront him and say like
no in a grand grand oh yeah big speech and she's just like you've been a shitty guy and you've
never treated me well and i'm over it and you need to get out of my life so that i can move on with
mine or whatever and then she like kicks him out and it's supposed to be this like big empowering
moment but at the same time,
the other parts of her story in this movie are her relationship to Jack
Black,
her relationship to this old guy,
Arthur.
And it's like,
she's not doing anything for herself really,
except for maybe just like,
maybe she feels better by helping this Arthur guy.
But I think,
I think what they're trying to,
I don't know,
like the Arthur thing is so strange, but I think like what they're trying to, I don't know, like the Arthur thing
is so strange,
but I think like
what they're trying to do
is like she's helping him
and at the same time,
I guess he's like helping,
because he like has such a,
like an admiration for her
and he's like,
he's like,
yeah,
you got spunk,
blah, blah, blah.
You're a leading lady.
Yeah.
And then she's like,
oh wait,
maybe I am the leading lady
in my own story.
But like also,
could she just realize
that herself
like did she have to right but like why did he have to be the one to tell her that after they've
like just met for like a day yeah I just I so much wanted to see like a subplot for both of them
them to just be pursuing something you know in their career or just some other thing they can
enrich their lives with and then not just men because all it is. Right. I wish that, I wish she wrote her,
she started writing her own books
and she fucking sent the pages
to Jasper
and she was like,
look you bitch.
Yeah,
and the pages said like,
fuck you,
you miserable piece of shit,
leave me alone.
Well,
and from what I can tell,
like both of these women
fly overseas to
lip sync in a bed.
That is the extent,
like they don't seem
to have any plans.
Yeah.
And that could have been another interesting part of the movie is how do they
meet if they've got to meet a man
maybe they go out and meet them
but literally both men show up
at their doors and kind of
forcibly enter
when they're like all I was going to do is lip sync to the killers
in England for three weeks
also a very long time to be away
doesn't make sense right yeah
they don't go out and explore even though they're both in like new cities and like wanted to get
away like yeah they just don't do anything except for things that relate to the old or new men in
their life and it's but low-key i'm in la for the first time and that's exactly what i'm well you're
not here on vacation like they deliberately went and went, and you could argue, sure,
like, it is the Christmas holidays.
Maybe things aren't open.
And yeah, they're on vacation.
But again, that's my argument that clearly this movie
was not meant to take place
at Christmas,
and the studio was,
I mean, I'm guessing.
I do like that.
No, yeah, that's the thing.
That checks out.
That I had not thought about.
There's also just, like,
weird little moments
that for some reason
stand out to me
that I'm like,
was this supposed to go somewhere?
I don't know why, but when Cameron Diaz opens the closet and there's like a little black dress, she goes, nice dress.
And then I'm like, that's it.
I was like, was there supposed to be, was this supposed to be a thing?
That paid off.
In no way.
There's like a lot of weird, just like loose things like that, you know, that I, that I just, I want to know what, well, no, I don't know.
It's almost as if this script is 45 pages too long maybe this is so there oh god who is editing this movie like
the dog scene the long another scene that should have been cut a long scene in which cameron diaz
explains lipstick to one of jula's daughters why Oh, yeah. Why is that there?
It's like where she turns and she's like,
and those two girls are, first of all, very creepy.
No, they're cute.
I like them.
No, they keep going, Amanda, do you want to stay forever? Do you want to come in?
Amanda, do you want to sleep in my bed with me?
Come into my tent.
Amanda, what's on your face?
They don't have a mom.
Their mom is straight dead
I hate them
Amanda you look like one of my
barbies
those scenes are supposed to be like
I think they try to make Cameron Diaz seem
so hard which like
whatever shut up
but like they're like oh no
look at her I don't think she has any
chemistry with those children I don't think
it's like oh oh wow, look,
she can be soft and emotional
or whatever. I think that's the point of it,
but I'm like, you just gave her lip gloss.
I don't know. I'm not like,
wow, look at how maternal she is.
But then Jude Law comes in and he's like,
no one has ever been a bigger hit with my kids than you.
Not even their own mother.
They just totally lost all remaining memories of their mother
because you and your fucking salmon bod.
That's why I killed her.
The girls didn't like her, so she had to go.
Amazing.
Well, okay, I did have, I am shocked that I didn't think of,
because, okay, when Jude Law shows up, I'm like,
there is a very different version of this movie
where Jude Law kills Cameron Diaz
in the first 15 minutes of the movie.
Because he shows up, he's like,
I'm drunk, I know who lives here.
Yeah, this is my sister's house.
I'll just make myself at home.
I do this all the time.
And it's like, oh, he's a stone cold killer.
He's calling other women.
He's just like setting up
his next prey
while Cameron Diaz
is monologuing.
Oh,
looks like he's on the phone
with another woman.
Oops,
I've been spotted.
Like,
she's like,
I just,
I can't,
I can't show that I cared
because I just told him
that I don't care.
But now here I am,
I'm looking at him
talk to another woman.
Oh no.
What happens to those women?
That's my defining character trait.
All the women that aren't allowed to know that he has daughters.
His ultimate secret.
Well, the other thing about this movie is that the two women basically spend the whole movie measuring their self-worth based on the men that they know or, like, whether or not they're lovable.
Right.
Because early on, you see Iris talking to her colleague and...
The cool one who smokes and dores.
Right.
Yeah, exactly.
And she's like, we used to be together, but he cheated on me.
But now we're still friends and da-da-da.
And the girl in accounting.
She's like, I never realized how pathetic you are.
And Iris is like, really?
Oh, God, I'm so aware of it.
I know.
Cut to her sobbing.
And then Amanda is talking to her colleagues, and she's just like, remember when they used to say that single women over the age of 35 were more likely to be killed by a terrorist than to get married?
That's horrible.
There's that.
There's the scene where Kim Diaz and Kate Winslet are corresponding and, like, getting to know each other over this whatever-the-fuck website this would be.
And Iris is like, I'm Iris, by the way. Very normal, neat freak, healthy, non-smoker. and getting to know each other over this whatever-the-fuck website this would be.
And Iris is like, I'm Iris, by the way.
Very normal, neat freak, healthy, non-smoker.
Singing girl.
Hate my horrible life.
Whiner.
She needs a new therapist. They're literally all 12 years old.
They throw tantrums.
It's wild.
The physicality of it is so over the top totally and then a man responds by being like i'm amanda loner loser and complicated
wreck and it's just like they're just how many can measuring i know for word they actually lifted
this conversation from us um no but it's just these two women measuring their self-worth
based on how single they are or how much a man loves them and it's just like which is also
interesting because the story places them both as people who are very good at their jobs yeah
she they say multiple times and that's why they pay me the big bucks yeah for her fucking trailer
with james franco another thing that doesn't wait can i say something about that yeah no god okay That's why they pay me the big bucks for her fucking trailer with James Franco and other
things that doesn't age well.
Wait, can I say something about that?
Yeah, no.
Oh, God.
Okay.
James Franco and Lindsay Lohan exist as themselves in this universe of the movie The Holiday.
Yes.
But Lindsay Lohan was in Mean Girls with Rachel McAdams, who's in Sherlock Holmes with Jude
Law.
It doesn't work out.
Also, James Franco was in Pineapple Express
with Seth Rogen, who's in Superbad
with Jonah Hill. I've never talked about Seth Rogen in front of me.
Sorry. But he was in Superbad with
Jonah Hill, who was in Wolf of Wall Street with
Leonardo DiCaprio, who was in Titanic
with Kate Winslet.
You got there. You got there.
You got there. What a
fucking weird stylistic choice for them to go into
the weird trailer fantasies of Cameron Diaz's life.
Never good.
Never good.
So strange.
So bad.
I do like whenever Cameron Diaz is doing her job.
She's just like saying stuff and they're like, she's brilliant.
She goes in.
She's like, needs to be shorter.
Yeah.
Needs to be faster.
It's got to be red.
And they're like happy red not a
scorsese right and then john krasinski is like oh my god she's brilliant she's brilliant like
there it's just i hate it sucks in this movie she sucks i love it though but so we're all dying
so we know about their careers at least we know what they do because in movies we've discussed previously, like in When Harry Met Sally, we barely know what any of the women in that movie do for a living.
At least in this movie, we know what their jobs are.
And we even see them sort of doing their jobs at the beginning.
It doesn't have to make sense.
But they have jobs when they're easily
could have been and instead all of the other storylines are dedicated to their relationships
with men when again it could have been a story about like them going on a journey of self-discovery
or self-improvement or and like even even if uh you do need a weird arthur subot. Maybe make it not an old white guy. It could be a woman
who she meets.
And, you know.
Because the payoff of the Arthur subplot
is also,
you're just like,
that's what we were waiting for.
Because Jasper shows up,
which is again like,
you just got engaged
but you just disappeared on Christmas.
Sure.
That supports your theory even more.
Right.
Of like maybe a week
where just he could say he was on a business trip but anyways he shows up and is like kate
red bikini you're hot i don't know i'm just sort of a plot device and he shows up he's just being
a plot device flopping around and kate wins like she has this very sudden realization because she had been told about a Barbara Stanwyck movie
by Arthur the Old Man, and that's why she,
but there's a great moment where literally she's asked,
like, what's gotten into you?
And she's like, I don't know, and it's like,
she might as well just be like,
there's 15 minutes left in the movie.
Doesn't she say gumption?
She screams gumption and pumps her
fists.
For a two hour,
45 minute movie,
the arcs are like,
almost everything happens in the last
15 minutes. Because it's wild because
her and Jack Black share, what, a single
kiss? And finally,
Arthur's stupid WGA
event. And now he is like yeah I'm going to
fucking New Year's with you what right I don't know their country and then he also pumps his
fists but here's the thing Jack Black is extremely charming so I get it I get it I liked I liked when
he pumped his fists I will say Kate Winslet was laying it on a bit. Sure. Well, this is an actor's film, so. This is an actor's film.
I mean, just the blockbuster scene alone is one of my favorite things that has ever happened.
Because it's just, they're just like, let's just let Jack do his thing, you know?
And I love it so much.
The scene where Jack Black and Kate Winslet are scoodly doodling together
is very tense and difficult to watch because kate winslet is not enjoying herself no
she does not want to be there does she like jack black as a person i'm gonna guess hard no
no because that scene between them is so like I watched it two times because the first time
I was like
oh Kate Winslet
her character is nervous
but then I was like
no Kate Winslet
personally is nervous
you're gonna make me
fucking screwed a lady do
like
right
and that's the moment
where we're supposed to be like
oh there's something here
but Kate Winslet goes like
I was
and then she's like
screwed a lady do it goes like and then the entire room is like
squirtle it
and one take
and they both
seem very
uncomfortable
one take
there was
no more than
one take
for any of
these shots
I'm sorry
I just have to
mention best line
reading in the
entire thing
besides the
weather is
are you
embarrassed
by this game
I've started to play?
I hate it.
Literally.
So funny.
Guys, the thing is, I think I just want to be the female Jack Black.
I think that's what it is, maybe.
That is the most appealing role in this movie.
It's like, you've got to be anyone.
But, oh, God.
Yeah, it's fun.
Please go back and watch this scene.
Jack Black and Kate Winslet are scatting together.
It's crazy.
She literally is just.
Like how you'd sing in church choir if you did not know the words.
But he's really supportive.
He's like, oh, is it a screw-d-ally do instead of a doodly-do?
And she's like, she's just improv-ing, you know?
Kim Woodson has not taken UCB 301.
That much we know for sure.
I have to leave in like 10 minutes.
Okay.
Wait, real quick.
I made a list of all of the tropes we see in this movie.
Oh, God, yeah.
So, one, a woman cripplingly depressed
over a man who doesn't love her.
A frigid, career-driven woman
who can't be emotionally vulnerable.
A man who cheated on his girlfriend
with his receptionist,
a younger woman who is his subordinate.
A woman being bad at driving.
A person changing their mind at the airport
about leaving a romantic interest behind.
Big ol' pratfall.
Big ol' snow-themed pratfall.
Oh, that too.
Oh, wait.
Right before she starts
driving badly,
she pratfalls.
Yeah, yeah.
And then at the end,
when she's being driven away
back to the airport
because she has changed
her flight twice
in this movie,
there's nothing more
She's a true blue customer.
Like, in 2017,
it's so hard
to watch a movie about so many rich white
people who are so rich that they can just be like actually i'm just gonna buy a million dollar ticket
to another country tomorrow and you know what i always think of like not only is that crazy the
rich thing but also she's very rude she has not reached out to kate winslet to be like hey i'm
coming right i'm just gonna come fucking back and then be like, oh, please leave my
house now.
You're going to want to leave.
But then, so at the end, whenever Cameron Diaz is like, going to go back and actually
leave this time, and she's in the car and she's like, wait a minute, I've changed my
mind.
I forgot something.
Because I started to cry.
Because she cried and it fixed her.
Jude Law fixes her.
Jude Law does fix her.
Let's give him some credit. Feminist icon Jude Law fixes her. Jude Law does fix her. Let's give him some credit.
Feminist icon Jude Law fixes Cameron Diaz.
Fixes the fuck out of her.
She's fucking cured.
Of whatever her problem was.
So she makes the car turn around and she's like, can't you go any faster?
And he's like, no.
And then she's like, okay, I'll get out and run in the snow.
So she goes back to her house.
When she runs and then she pauses and then the music swells and she's like,
she goes back to Kate Winslet's house. Jude Law is still there for some reason. Crying! I love when she shows up and he's like,
it's Christmas! No, Caitlin, that's good. Why isn't he with
his kids on Christmas? What day is it even? They, Caitlin, that's good. Why isn't he with his kids on Christmas?
What day is it even?
They're upstairs.
They're playing with their scribblies.
They actually killed their mom, and he's scared of them.
Amanda, can we put your face on our face?
Daddy.
Amanda, can we strip you naked and stab you to death?
Tell Cameron Diaz that you're daddy, daddy.
Who's daddy?
Okay.
Let's talk about whether or not the movie passes the Bechdel test.
Somehow.
It does.
Somehow it does.
I like to argue it passes when Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz mumble to each other incoherently
at the end of the movie over loud Christmas.
They're like, nice to meet you.
Because I'm convinced that's when everyone in the movie
met for the first time.
Kate Winslet and Jude Law had never met.
Yeah. Right. Because he's
not actually his sister. He's just
a murdering person who has murder
daughters who murder for him.
Yeah. What if Kate Winslet showed up
and was like, who's this?
And Cameron Diaz is like, wait,
this is your brother. She's don't I don't have a
brother which is why she never mentioned her nieces because she doesn't have nieces but there
is that scene which I think arguably could pass the Bechdel test although I think they only talk
about Jude Law but they uh Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet talk on the phone and she's like on three
way calling with all of them and then she has that real fun moment where she's like did you sleep
with the buh buh buh buh and Cameron Diaz like oh it's still me and actually it fun moment where she's like, did you sleep with the ba-ba-ba-ba? And Cameron Diaz is like, ooh, it's still me.
And actually, it's Cam.
And she's like, oh dear, my...
She wouldn't say my bad.
Oh, you know, British...
My...
My oopsie daisies.
Oh, Mary Poppins, I'm sorry.
What a slip.
What a slip.
Mama's like, we gotta go.
A couple more times where women interact.
Kate Winslet and her colleague, when they're like, she's like, I love this man.
He doesn't love me back.
And she's like, you're so fucking pathetic.
And she's like, I know.
I'm so aware.
It's crazy that that scene does pass the next one.
No, it doesn't, though.
It doesn't?
They talk for one minute.
Oh, really?
Maybe then.
Do they have a name, though?
I can't remember.
She does not have a name.
I don't think oh maybe
that's it on imdb she's named but i don't think we find out her name in the actual movie but they
they talk for a minute and 45 seconds i timed it and they spent almost the entire time talking
about jasper uh and then another woman comes in and interrupts and she's like iris did you find
your story and she's like oh no down to the wire sorry uh but she does not
have a name either so that does not pass the vector test there's a scene where amanda's i
think assistant uh yeah yeah yeah comes in we don't know her role really but she's like there
in the editing room yeah and she's like oh is this a bad time cameron deeves is like i'm just
flipping out and then they i hate her she's for a little bit, but then she's like, Ben needs you.
So they mention a man, although I don't even know if we know her character's name.
I think, well, she, again, named on IMDb, wasn't paying close enough attention to know.
Right, right, right.
And then they're talking online, Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz,
but I don't know if that counts because it's
an internet correspondence.
I thought that that
maybe counted. I think it counts.
Because they are talking directly to each other.
It's a weird gray area thing. This movie does
pass the Bechdel test, though. It does.
It simply does.
Cameron Diaz talks to Jude Law's daughters
and they're contemplating murdering her.
She's like, oh, your perfume,
it smells so nice.
Thank you.
It's very nice.
And we know both of their names.
Sophie and whatever the hell.
Sophie and Olivia.
Amanda.
Oh, I like when the little kid asks like,
are you going to stay over?
You could sleep in the tent with us.
We haven't had a grown up yet.
Bitch, if I'm staying over,
I'm fucking your dad.
That really recontextualizes it.
We never have adults over.
Amanda, can I eat your fingernails?
So women do interact in this movie quite a bit
and some of those interactions do pass the Bechdel test,
which is upsetting.
All right, let's rate the movie.
On our 0 to 5 nipple scale,
based on the portrayal of women in the movie,
I'm going to give it, like, a 1.
It's not doing well for me.
It's not.
I like at least that you see them having jobs
and sort of doing their jobs,
so it does a little better than a lot of rom-coms but the fact that their entire stories are based solely around other men
in their lives and every pursuit that they have and storyline that they have is all based on men
so there are just so many opportunities for them to like you know they're like oh i'm at this new
place i can sort of discover myself and and try something new and like learn something about myself but they like
pretty much don't or if they do it's because a man inspired them to do that so it's just like
i might even give it a half nipple um yeah i'm gonna give it a half nipple and it belongs to the dog who winks at Cameron Diaz.
Yeah, the born performer.
The ghost. The Oscar winning dog.
Yeah, so a half nipple
because this movie sucks and I hate it.
Rebecca, how do you get it?
I mean, you're right.
But also.
I'm going to give it
two nipples because
Kate Winslet, it can be charming when she's charming a bit.
I also just like that these girls like to rock.
And as a girl who likes to rock.
They're rocking out.
They're not listening to Celine Dion or anything.
They're listening to rock and roll.
They're listening to white hetero male music.
They're listening to Jet and The Killers.
And both of those are because of Kateate winsland and not cameron diaz and yeah i mean they are both successful i mean cameron diaz does
like got that fucking money and she's like in the industry i'm like okay cool um i don't know
that her trailer is amazing but people seem to think so. So I'm going to give it to, and I'm going to give it to
the Santa Ana Wins,
which for some reason
are an element of this movie
for no fucking reason.
Also badly timed
because the Santa Ana Wins
are actively killing
the entire state.
Oh, true.
Blowing fires
from place to place.
I was like,
ooh, not a good week for this.
Santa Ana Wins.
They're not so magical this week.
I take it back.
Yeah.
It's okay. Fun as I saying she does what she wants yeah that's what really changes things for her is the wins yeah it's a
weird magical not i don't even know element in there so much okay so fine i'm gonna give it
oh i'll get i'll give it a full nippy i'm gonna give it a full nippy. I'm going to give it a full nippy.
Kate Winslet, I'm very worried about her mental health in this movie. I really would have loved Kate Winslet to see herself check herself into a facility at the beginning of this movie genuinely because she makes a suicide attempt.
Very scary.
That whole thing is troubling.
Cameron Diaz, honestly, not to be not an ally, but lost cause.
She's floating around on an iceberg she's hopeless
we don't know what's going on there uh you know Jude Law doesn't matter uh Jack Black adorable
should not be cheating on his girlfriend kind of suffered from nice guy syndrome and literally
cut from him cheating on his girlfriend to why am I such a nice guy like that killed me um i'm gonna give my one nipple to
jude law's daughter who wants to straight up eat cameron diaz's face out she's like what's on your
face could i have some and i put it on my lips i want to put your face on my face so that's
i want to make a movie about them amazing um. Rebecca, thank you so much for being here.
Thanks for having me.
So much fun.
Good to have you.
Where can people find you online?
I'm on Twitter at Almond Milk Hotel.
Ha ha, we love it.
It's hilarious.
Love it.
I have a show called Classroom Crush.
It's a podcast.
Jamie was just on it.
It's about crushes from elementary school to high school.
And there's a fucking scorcher of guests coming this week because I recorded
a lot here
and that's on Twitter
at Classroom Crush
as well.
Amazing.
Check it out.
You can follow us
at Bechtelcast
on Twitter and Instagram
and go to our website
Bechtelcast.com
You can subscribe
to our Patreon.
Become a matron today.
It's only $5.
Extra two episodes
a freaking month.
Holy shit.
Come on.
All right.
Such a good bargain
and hey, it's the holidays.
If you're like, I'm actually not ready to become a matron, but I just want to help you
guys out a little bit.
I just want to give David and Caitlin money.
You can just throw a little tip in our tip jar if you go to our website, Bechdelcast.com.
That would be cool and you're great and everything's great.
And now we're better.
We fixed, this movie fixed us.
I honestly feel completely cured. I don't need a new therapist now
because Jack Black sang at me
for two and a half hours.
Oh, this movie rules.
Sorry.
Sorry.
All right.
Happy holidays.
Happy holidays.
Bye.
Bye.
Daphne Caruana Galizia
was a Maltese investigative journalist
who on October 16thth 2017 was assassinated.
Crooks Everywhere unearthed the plot to murder a one-woman WikiLeaks.
She exposed the culture of crime and corruption that were turning her beloved country into a mafia state.
Listen to Crooks Everywhere on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. like you always do. What was that? That was live audio of a woman's nightmare.
Can Kay trust her sister
or is history repeating itself?
There's nothing dangerous
about what you're doing.
They're just dreams.
Dream Sequence
is a new horror thriller
from Blumhouse Television,
iHeartRadio, and Realm.
Listen to Dream Sequence
on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get
your podcasts.
I'm NK,
and this is Basket Case.
What is wrong with me?
A show about the ways that mental illness is shaped by not just biology.
Swaps of different meds.
But by culture and society.
By looking closely at the conditions that cause mental distress,
I find out why so many of us are struggling to feel sane,
what we can do about it, and why we should care.
Oh, look at you giving me therapy, girl.
Listen to Basket Case every Tuesday on the iHeartRadio app,
Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.