The Best of Car Talk - #2448: The Costanza Method
Episode Date: June 15, 2024Click and Clack pride themselves on their subtle communications skills. But every once in a while you have to make your point any way you can. To whit, Ray employs 'The Costanza Method'(Yell at everyb...ody) on this episode of the Best of Car Talk.Get access to hundreds of episodes in the Car Talk archive when you sign up for Car Talk+ at plus.npr.org/cartalkLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy
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Discussion (0)
David Lynch's films explore dark themes, but in a rare interview on Wild Card this week,
he says he's remarkably content and you can be too.
We're supposed to be like little dogs where their tail is wagging and being happy,
little smiles on our face all day long. This is the way it's supposed to be.
I'm Rachel Martin. Join us on NPR's Wild Card Podcast, the game where cards control the conversation. Hello and welcome to Card Talk from National Public Radio with us, click and clack the
Tappan Brothers.
And we're broadcasting this week from the automotive Olympic village here
at Car Talk Plaza.
Now, are you sick of the Olympics yet?
Are they over yet?
Have they started yet?
I mean, everybody knows about the basic Summer Olympic event.
You know, there's running, there's jumping, swimming, and then there are the various combinations
of those three.
There's the run, jump, and swim, and run the jump swim and run the swim jump
run and then the swim again you know the double swim double jump double run anyway
we thought in the interest of variety it might be good to add a couple of
automotive events to the to the roster create a little competition among
different types of cars for instance here's one of which we know the American team would have the advantage,
the electric window race.
I love it.
You know, they always have different distances, different distances in races, right?
Well, we could have the down, the down and up on the marathon, the down and up 26 times.
I like it.
It must be something to do with cup holders, but I don't know what it would be.
Well, I don't know either. I know, but I got another one here. The Max AC cool down.
You leave the cars out in the sun in the Walmart's parking lot in Atlanta all day long.
Then like at three o'clock you start the cars, put the AC on max and see which interior reaches 60 degrees first.
Brilliant, isn't it?
Jesus, exciting too. Well, it's exciting too.
Well, it is exciting.
Yeah.
And there wouldn't be any judging.
I don't like judged events.
Well, it would be a very objective.
I mean, this is good.
Ty, all the events should be decided by the clock.
Exactly.
You can't have judges put up a thing that says 7-2, 6-1.
It's too subjective.
Too political.
Exactly.
It's open to political skullduggery. So this is
good. I think so. So we couldn't have things like the prettiest car. So the dark is out.
Now I have a sneaking suspicion that our listeners could come up with more of these, maybe even
better ones. So if you have other Automotive Olympic events to suggest,
send them to us here at Car Talk Plaza,
or email them to us by visiting the Talk to Car Talk section
of cartalk.com on the World Wide Web.
I like to make a little plea for some snail mail.
I mean, Ken tells me that 90% of our mail
is now electronic.
Well, I think we have intimidated people a
little bit. I think people figure that if they can't communicate with us
electronically, that's the traditional method has been abandoned by us. Now, I
have admit that we have some mail that's been around for like two and a half
years, but that doesn't mean that we ain't getting to it. We are. We are getting to
it and we're getting to the email just slowly so don't worry about that
But I like to read I like to read snail mail. I mean you can't do it up. It's handwritten
Right in the US Postal Service is gonna go out of business and nobody's mailed us a fish or anything lately
So this is the season now that the warm weather is finally approaching this is the season fruit and fish fruit and fish
Preferably dead fish.
You cannot email a fish.
That's right, you can't.
Hey, I actually have a piece of interesting mail to read.
Really?
I have several things.
I'll save the controversial piece for later.
But this one, according to the FBI, most modern-day bank robberies are unsophisticated and unprofessional
crimes committed by young male repeat offenders who apparently don't know the first thing
about their business.
Also, they're running a seminar?
This information was included in an interesting amusing article titled, How Not to Rob a Bank,
by Tim Clark, which appeared in the 1987 edition of the old farmers all this is pretty
old sent us this receive Willie Sutton right so hard to know how things arrive
Clark reported that in spite of the widespread use of surveillance cameras
76% of bank robbers use no disguise and 86% never studied the bank before
robbing it so he he gives some examples of-
They do know one thing, however.
There's money in the bank.
There's money, yeah, Willie Sutton knew that.
But he gives some advice to what would be-
Money rob banks, the money's there.
Why do you rob banks, Mr. Sutton,
because that's where the money is.
He gives some advice.
Here's, I'll just pick a couple of the highlights.
Don't sign your demand note.
Demand notes have been written on the back of a subpoena issued in the name of a bank
robber in Pittsburgh, on an envelope bearing the name and address of another bank robber
in Detroit, and in East Hartford, Connecticut on the back of a withdrawal slip which gave
the robberbers signature and account
number.
Consider another line of work.
There was a case of the hopeful criminal in Swansea, Mass., who when the teller told him
she had no money, fainted.
He was still unconscious when the police arrived, his life favorite pick the right bank
clock advises that you don't follow the lead of the fellow in anaheim california
who tried to hold up a bank that was no longer in business
and therefore had no money
on the other hand you don't want to be too familiar with the bank either
a california robber
ran into his mother
while making his getaway
she turned them in
uh... ran into his mother while making his getaway. She turned him in. It brings up an interesting ethical question.
If we bumped into mom while we were perpetrating a crime, would she turn us in?
I'm afraid so.
I'm afraid so.
She's turning us in now.
She's making up stuff to turn us in.
You call the FCC every week.
If you'd like to call us, our number is 1-800-332-9287.
Hello, you're on Car Talk.
This is Ted from Staten Island. Hey Ted what's happening? I'm doing okay I'm stressed out at the
moment but for for a variety of reasons. First of all my brakes don't seem to be working properly
and I'm moving today from Staten Island to Clevelandio and i've got to drive the car four hundred and sixty six mile
literally as we talk to move it a movie mine uh... my personal possessions out
of the house and i'm about to get in my car with my family everything else
valuable that i own that left over and drive to cleveland and i break our
working does the term waiting for the last minute at the meeting to you
uh... so what are the breaks doing tell me here but we don't get back up for a
second
i got the car service two weeks ago uh... by honda i just have to uh...
an oil change and i told him to look over the car
they looked over the car that for the break the rear brake needed adjustment
they did that
the very next day i drove the car
uh... down on the stand on the expressway near the dock
and uh... as i was going down there got into a traffic jam and i want to go
apply break pressure of my applied to break pedal and there was nothing there
will virtually nothing there
but i thought the car back to honda i've had book up on the profoundly wrong with
the car
they looked it over they couldn't find anything wrong with it
at all
okay and they turned it back to me
so i could get to another another mechanic
he looked at me but he couldn't find anything wrong but based on the
description that i gave him
he replaced the master cylinder good good
okay and then i got the car back
and i've been driving around and it
the break they stop
the pedal doesn't feel right
now i want to use
it well it's not a it's not much. It's not like there's nothing there when I press down at all.
But it's low. Is it low? Is that the problem?
But the thing is, it's not always low.
When it's low, if you pump once...
Comes up.
It comes up.
Boy, if there's a new master cylinder in there, it sure sounds to me like you got one of the brakes which is way out of adjustment and it could well be that someone just didn't know which way to
turn the little adjuster.
Well, one of two things is happening.
Either the brakes are unadjusted, that is the rear brakes are unadjusted so much that
the pedal is low, or there's air in the system which he didn't get out when he put the new
master cylinder.
He bled it three times.
Well that's good, because that really narrows it down
to brakes being misadjusted.
Is the car dangerous to drive?
Yeah.
Well, it is only because what's happening is,
when you step on the brake, there's not enough oomph
for it to push out the cylinders on the rear brakes
until you do it the second time.
So if you have to make a panic stop,
you might not stop too well
but what the good news so it seems to stop well when i have to make a panic
about the quantum from the sort of coming coming to an intersection and
slowing down slowly okay i know what's wrong
and they both miss this
your cars like an eighty eight eighty nine eighty eight on the civic
okay you live in new york
three years
where were previously with
this car? Michigan. Michigan, there we go. Yeah. Well you lived in some place where
it snowed where there was salt on the roads. Yeah. What's happened is the
slides on these calipers are not working correctly and both mechanics missed it
and that's why when you apply the brake pedal the pedal seems soft
because the caliper if i brother has just jump from the rear brakes now to
the front but i mean i'm not right
just so you're still on the same page yeah right
i'd might believe
your caliper slides us
stock or seized somebody told me that already i mean i thought the mechanic on
the phone who mentioned that but the the second mechanic i brought it to said
they were okay he's gonna take my bar unless he took the calipers off
and verified
that the slides actually work
we can't know that for sure
and so you gotta call them up and ask them to push
to swear on the bible
and that in fact he took the calipers and actually
push the pistons in and work the slides to make sure that they work if he did
that i'm wrong but if he did, if he says, oh, well, if he starts hemming and hawing
or staring up at the ceiling, you might have to do this face to face. You might not be
able to do it over the phone. Okay. See you Ted. Thanks a lot. Good luck. Bye. Wear your
seatbelts. Okay. We'll be right back with the answer to the puzzler right after these
messages.
All that sitting and swiping, your body is adapting to your technology. Learn how and what you can do about it. I really felt like the cloud in my brain kind of dissipated.
Once I started realizing what a difference these little breaks were making, there's
no turning back for me.
Take NPR's Body Electric Challenge.
Listen to the series wherever you get your podcasts.
I'm Rachel Martin.
After hosting Morning Edition for years, I know that the news can wear you down.
So we made a new podcast called Wild Card, where a special deck of cards and a whole
bunch of fascinating guests help us sort out what makes life meaningful.
It's part game show, part existential deep dive, and it is seriously fun.
Join me on Wild Card wherever you get your podcasts, only from NPR. series is as gossipy and over the top as ever. I love the dialogue as ridiculous as it is sometimes.
Same.
It's so ridiculous.
We're talking about the romance and the clothes and the nudity and obviously the Queen's
hair.
Listen to the Pop Culture Happy Hour podcast from NPR.
This message comes from the Kresge Foundation.
Established 100 years ago, the Kresge Foundation works to expand equity and opportunity in cities across America.
A century of impact, a future of opportunity. More at kresge.org.
Alright, here it is. This is your last chance to remember the puzzler.
I happen to remember the puzzler.
Because after today, the puzzler will go where?
Vacation. V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N. I happen to remember this after today the puzzler will go where?
vacation a Cion
Anyway, so wise guy. What is the puzzler? I don't remember the question, but I know the answer
Oh you well the question had to do with some vehicle that had a VW engine it weighed
$50,000 weight 50,000 bucks cost 50,000 pounds
Something like that. Here it is.
I know the answer.
That's why I remember.
That is quite good.
The puzzler came from Morrison T. Erickson from Sacramento, and here it is.
A special vehicle was first produced in 1949.
It wasn't the only special thing produced in 1949, I might add.
It was powered then by a Jeep engine, but now uses a VW engine.
It has a base price of $50,000.
Yeah, I heard that right.
It is not raced, but can often be found in a closed course, so to speak.
A famous sports celebrity was the first sales representative for this vehicle.
The question, very simply, what is the vehicle and who is the famous sports celebrity was the first sales representative for this vehicle? The question, very simply,
what is the vehicle and who is the famous sports celebrity that we know so well? You
know that answer?
Well, I know the answer to part A. And the answer to part A is the Zamboni machine.
That's right. Exactly right.
And I have to take a wild guess at number two if we know so well it's gotta be Sonia
Haney but she was dead in 1949.
No of course no she wasn't dead.
No?
She was the perpetrator of this?
Well no I mean she had nothing to do with the invention of it.
It was invented by Frank Zamboni.
I remember I used to buy sandwiches from him.
Yeah give me two large Zambonis, hold the hot pepper.
The Zamboni of course is the big thing that cleans off the ice on our skating rink, right?
Exactly right.
After the players go out, you know it's good at removing the blood too from the ice.
Except for the players go out.
Teeth.
Teeth.
Fix our teeth.
Well that was one of the latest improvements.
That's the Gordie Howe edition.
Introduced in 1985.
He bought an Army surplus Jeep and some spare parts
he had in the backyard.
Sounds like our Uncle Peter.
Finally, in the summer of 1949, he got the contraption
to work.
In 1994, the company sold its 5,000th ice resurfacer
to a rink in Japan.
Zamboni died in 1988 at the age of 87. Frank J. Zamboni, I believe, is his name.
Quite a guy, huh?
They sold there 5,000. 5,000 over roughly 50 years. They sell 100 of these things a year.
Yeah, pretty good, eh?
100 a year? There are 100 new skating rinks every year?
No, of course not.
Some of them break down and are unrepairable.
They must all break down.
There are only a hundred skating rinks in the whole world.
Do we have a winner?
Yeah.
The winner is Tim McDonald from Panama City, Panama.
Yay, Tim!
That's Panama City, Florida.
And for knowing that our pal Sonia Henney was the
big promoter of the Zamboni, as well as knowing Zamboni was the answer to the
question, Tim gets his very own copy of the Best of Car Talk on cassette or CD,
whichever we happen to have more of at the time that we're mailing them out. I
should mention that our esteemed producer Douglas Q. Berman is in the
laboratory beginning work on the Best of car talk volume B.
And he's eager to know,
what is your favorite car talk moment?
So if you have a favorite-
Other than when we say,
this is NPR, National Public Radio.
Which is the end of the show, right?
If you have a favorite car talk moment
that you'd like us to possibly include
in the best of car talk volume two
drop us a letter or
Drop Dougie a note here or send Dougie a fish send them a fish write it on a fish or email it to us at
Car talk calm and then go to talk to dog or something. I don't know there's a way to do that
So do that now if you'd like to call us with a question about car, our number here is 1-800-332-9287.
But I feel calmer.
I don't know what it is.
Hello, you're on Car Talk.
Hello, my name is Cheryl and I live in North Liberty, Iowa.
Cheryl, with an S or a C?
C. The only way to spell it.
Well, we know someone who spells it with an S. North Liberty, Iowa?
Yes, it's right near Iowa City
Uh-huh. Well, I have an 86 Chevy Nova and
The headliner is falling down and every time I get in the car
It rearranges my hair and I walk out with this curl on top of my head. Yeah, and
So I need some advice because I know you guys are what I would consider
laterally thinking fashion mavens of the car interior. Yes! I thought so. So I'll tell you what I've tried.
I've tried the glue and about asphyxiated myself. Oh yeah. And that doesn't work. I
think there's a little foam rubber thing that they put on there and then they glue
the material to that.
That's right.
The material has separated from the backing.
Yeah.
And it may have all fallen apart.
Yeah, I think so.
Well, is the foam piece still intact?
Well, not hardly.
Not hardly.
So that's disintegrated too.
So not only is the cloth coming down, but the liner is actually coming down too.
You're done for. You're done for. Because when that piece deteriorates, it sort of crumbles, right?
Yeah. And when it does, there's nothing to stick to anymore. Right. So you're going to have to
replace that. Well, you could resort to the NHL. The... no no i don't know what i don't know i don't know how many you could just
rip the thing out you don't get me there's no law that says you have to
have a headliner that's true on the other hand it would cushion you to some
extent
and if your head were to hit the roof
all but the stock market that problem by wearing one of those styrofoam bicycle
helmets well really that could be part of my
my my look at the top of the top a part of you know what the no headliner
look at the level whenever we get these kind of a good vagus and i don't have a
plan for that
but we get these wacko kinds of questions i always try to go
and you know i mean if this is not your average problem you know we don't get
many people with this problem
i always ask myself
what would i do if it were my car?
And you know what image came to me?
I bet you my brother is going to be able to pull it right out.
All right.
What would I, if that were my car?
Yeah?
Oh, you'd wear a hat?
No.
A stick.
Oh yeah.
That's true.
A stick, and you wedge it into the seat, and boop, it holds up the headliner.
Just on my side.
Right? Sure. Oh, but the stick has to go between the seats. the seat and boop it holds up the headliner just on my side right sure oh
put this the stick has to go between the seats you have a Nova so you have
bucket seats yeah right where the handbrake lever is yeah you're gonna
put a stick and to that stick you're gonna attach a piece of plywood about
eight inches wide by two feet long that's, and it's gonna go right across. Oh, you're better than that. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, a broom. A broom.
You need a broom.
A broom is good.
You cut off the handle and you wedge that baby in there.
The classic shorthandled broom.
Okay.
Okay, Cheryl.
But I would, actually, I would just rip the thing out
because after a while, the broom is gonna get,
is gonna start making you nervous.
Well, no, the broom is good because when there's snow in your car in the winter,
what do you do? You just take it out. Well, you sweep it off. You take the broom out,
you clean it off, you stick the broom back in. I love multi-functionality. Yes, I know.
And I also might attract some conversation. Oh, there's no question about that. Now,
if you really wanted to fix this, it would require that you went to a junkyard and bought a new
headliner. I see.
But putting the headliner in may require taking out the windshield.
Oh, not the...
Front or back windshield, I don't know.
Because it may not fit in through any other way.
Uh-huh.
Well, could I use any other kind of fabric?
Oh, could you fashion one yourself?
Yes, because see, I make custom clothes.
You do?
Uh-huh.
You do. You're? Uh-huh.
You do.
You're thinking of like a nice Scotch plaid?
No.
You're going to have a full Chicago inside the car.
Yeah, Scotch plaid would be interesting.
But if I did, how would I make it stay up?
Well, you can't.
That's the problem, because the thing that the material is stuck to is disintegrated.
So there's no way.
I mean, you could take what you have there and try to sew it to the backing.
But if you can't do that, then you'll not be able to sew anything else to that, and
you must remove then the whole piece.
Yeah.
Well, if I took it off, is there something I could cover the ceiling with that would
kind of make it a slight fashion statement? You're thinking maybe you take down the headliner.
Yeah.
And you'll rug it.
And you'll be left, of course, with that other piece that's up there.
That piece will be gone too because that all will come down.
You'll be left with the metal roof.
Yeah.
That's what you want to end up with.
You'll be looking at the other side of the painted surface.
Well, there's still some of the foam rubber there and some of the glue that's right.
Yeah, but that's all going to fall out.
But you're going to have to scrape that all off scrape it off okay
scrape all that off and then we we want to make what you call a fashion statement
you could rug it rug it yeah with contact cement oh right sure rubber
cement apply to the apply to the metal and rubber cement apply to the rug you
know let that stuff dry on both surfaces and you slam it together
Make sure you put it on straight because you'll never get it off
All right, and it won't come loose in the hot weather. Of course it will but that's why you have the broom with you
No, I don't think it'll come loose in the hot weather, but I'll confess that I've never tried it
I mean we count on our listeners to try all these stupid. Yes
It's like doing research in the field, isn't it? Yes it is. Drive around your neighborhood,
somebody must be tearing out a shag rug someplace. You don't need much. You don't need much. I'd go
for a nice, you know, something in a nice peach or melon. Cheryl, you're a good sport. Thanks for
calling and good luck. Have fun with this. Don't miss this opportunity because you can have a lot
of laughs.
You've got to have fun because if you get serious about it, you'll be very disappointed.
I see.
OK.
Because nothing's going to work.
I promise.
All right.
Good luck.
Send us a picture.
OK.
All right.
Bye.
Bye.
You could, I mean, draperies come to mind.
I mean, you could put all kinds of interesting stuff.
Tapestries.
Oh, we didn't mention sand.
Oh, you know what she needs?
Gluing the sand to the inside.
No, velvet Elvis.
Oh, no.
She needs a velvet Elvis on her headliner.
Velvet Elvis.
Of course, everyone should have one.
Yes.
We'll be right back with more calls and the new puzzler after these messages.
Prime Minister Narendra Modi is the most powerful man in Indian politics, but big questions
remain about how he's held onto power.
India is really in danger now.
All the democratic structures have been compromised.
Cyber hacking, mass arrests, and what it means for India's democracy on the latest episode
of the Sunday Story
from NPR's Up First podcast.
Climate change can feel scary. But shortwave is all about empowering you with knowledge.
We find hope in the ways people and governments are innovating and searching for solutions.
And all the ways that different organisms are fighting to adapt to that climate future
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Were back you're listening to car talk on national public radio with us clicking clack the tapper brothers and we're here to discuss cars
car repair
refrigerators
I got the list over here. I lost already.
Oh, here it is.
We could do this instead of a list of underwriters.
We have a list of people.
Adversaries.
Companies that would never be underwriters.
So we can actually, this is good because we can send this list directly to the underwriting department
and tell them not to waste their time on the phone call. Don't call these guys.
Don't waste your time on Walker, Arvin, AP, Moses Mechanic, the Honda dealer in Staten
Island, General Electric, or the Chrysler Corporation.
What a surprise!
Surprise!
Anyway, and last on the list, a controversial issue.
No, what was it? Yeah, a very controversial issue is this comes from Ellen Palms of Seattle, Washington
After listening to your show last week
I just had to write in response to the woman the woman caller who said she bought her daughter a nice safe
Volvo because she's such a terrible driver
This is exactly the kind of logic that makes Volvo drivers so horrifying
to everyone else on the road,
as they are living proof that safer cars
only encourage people to drive less safely.
Woof.
Surrounded by big fluffy airbags
and protected by every safety device imaginable,
they can drive like morons,
securing the knowledge that they will survive any crash
that they will surely
cause."
Woof!
Pretty serious words.
Well, there's a good deal of speculation about whether being in a Volvo actually decreases
one's driving skills or bad drivers naturally gravitate to Volvos.
This caller's remarks would suggest the latter and help drive, pun intended, home the point
that the key to making cars safer
is not to make crashes more survivable.
You ready for this?
Mm-hmm.
Bad drivers will only start paying attention to what they're doing if they can be certain
that a collision will result in serious injury or death to themselves.
Woof!
Yeah, yeah, we'd call that automotive Darwinism of some sort. I can't imagine what i'm darwin ism of some
so that's real selection
i can't imagine why you didn't take this call to task
for such wrong-headed thinking
the way you rant about speed limits one would think you were actually concerned
about driving safe about driving safety
in any case the way to keep her daughter from having another accident
is to remove all safety devices in her car and replace them with many sharp, protruding, dangerous
objects.
As many as she can find.
Thus making an impact of any kind a certain fatality and something to be avoided at all
costs.
Maybe they're going to fix punji sticks to the dashboard.
Barring this, what she needs to buy her daughter is not another car
But off us pass coffin a bus pass
I guess so thanks for letting me throw in my two cents Ellen Palms
Seattle Washington boy this is in this is in the nature of a rant and rave I would say it certainly is
But it is an interesting concept which which we in fact have discussed before.
Why should you save the people?
Why should you save people who are obviously going to go out and kill themselves anyway,
except to put them in the hospitals where we have to pay even more money?
It's like the prisoners.
It's the same thing.
Oh, jeez.
Don't get him started.
No, no, I'm not suggesting that that's correct.
I mean, I'm just suggesting that that's correct.
I mean, I'm just playing devil's advocate here.
But it is a very controversial issue, I think.
Well, I think the young lady in question,
for whom we suggested the vault.
She was having an accident a minute, as I remember.
Yeah, but I didn't get the impression
that she was a reckless driver,
prone to speeding and driving recklessly.
She was just absent-minded perhaps,
or not skilled. So I didn't think that necessarily she was one of those that should be eliminated,
if you get that. I mean, I get the impression from this letter that-
Oh, you're one of those tree-hugger types.
Yes, I am.
Trying to find a-
We have to accommodate everyone. Not everyone has the same level of expertise.
Not everyone is competent.
Not everyone knows what to do.
And so we have to…
Exemplified by this show.
I mean, only one of us knows the answers.
And so we have to accommodate all the bumbling fools of the world who are going around hurting
themselves.
We have to help them to not hurt themselves.
Yes, that was what differentiates us from the animal kingdom.
And what about the ones that aren't differentiated and are in fact animals?
What do we do with them?
Hug them.
2800-332-9287.
Hello, you're on car tour.
Hey, this is all, stay on hold.
Whoever you are, this is ordinarily the time where we do the new puzzler, but because the puzzler is on vacation
There will be no new puzzler. What are we gonna do this week? I
Don't know
Well, if you if you think you're gonna be feeling puzzler withdrawal this summer
Because the puzzle is on vacation. You can go to our website where you can find every week
a puzzle from the puzzler archives.
Not a new puzzler, but a puzzler of yesteryear.
A recycled puzzler one might say.
Yesterweek.
Yesterweek.
Yeah, that's right, because people might feel withdrawal
from the puzzler.
Yeah, you're right.
That's a good idea.
So I think you can go to our website, cartalk.com, and find a puzzler just to keep your creative
juices flowing, keep your mind working. And if you'd like to send us a puzzle, you can
still do it by writing to us at Puzzler Tower, Cartalk Plaza, Box 3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge,
Our Faire City, Math 02238 with your puzz puzzler submission or you can email it to us from car talk comm on on the web
By clicking on the talk to car talk section. Yeah
anyway
We'll take a call now our numbers 1-800-332-9287
Hello, you're in car talk
Hello, Seattle. You're at the same. Hi, who's this? Hey there.
Hey there.
To whom are we speaking?
Kevin.
Kevin, where are you from?
Atlanta, Georgia.
Really?
My problem is this, among others.
I've got a 1991 Dodge Spirit ES.
It's the sport model and...
Yeah, right.
ES means extra sporty.
Extra sport.
Or extremely stupid.
One or the other.
Put down Chrysler Corporation.
Chrysler Corporation again.
Again.
Okay, go ahead, Ken.
And so, in addition to the problem that the car's not a really cool car, I've got some
actual mechanical problems in it and it does to what is
whenever step on the gas pedal
it makes a little clicking sound and then when the
card decelerate
wins at the end of the deceleration
it makes another little clicking sound and i would analogize it almost to like
uh... i'd visualize there being like a little valve opening and closing making
a clicking noise almost and closing making a clicking
noise almost like it's stuck. And it only happens when the car is in gear. If I race
the engine in park, I don't get the clicking noise, but I get it constantly.
So this happens, you're accelerating from a dead stop. What if you're accelerating at
what if you're doing 30 and accelerating to 40?
It happens, all I have to do is step on the gas pedal
for it to make a noise.
And you get this click, click, click,
it's just a couple of clicks and then it stops?
Yeah, it click, like if I depress my foot on the gas pedal,
it makes a little clicking noise,
and then we go about the acceleration,
and then when I take my foot off the accelerator,
or when I take it quickly to the brake, I get the
clicking noise.
Well you could easily have a bad motor mount or the noise could be coming from the exhaust
system.
There's a, where the exhaust system attaches to the exhaust manifold, there's a flange
that actually is like a big ball and socket joint. And the noise could be coming from that.
Here's how you find out what it is.
OK.
I bet you you can reproduce this noise
without moving the car.
He just said he can't.
He can't.
He just said the car's got to be in motion.
I'm about to tell the thing in drive.
My brother has adopted the George Costanza's parents.
Frank Costanza.
Frank Costanza approached to life.
Yelling everybody.
I'm going to go to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom.
I'm going to the bathroom. I'm going to the bathroom. I'm going to the bathroom. I'm going to the bathroom. I'm going to the bathroom. The George Costanza's parents, Frank Costanza's, approach to life.
Yell at everybody.
Okay, we're gonna put the thing in drive.
I might as well talk about, before we answer your question, Kevin, I'm gonna tell you,
our refrigerator broke recently and it's a generous electric refrigerator and we call
the 800 number and they cheerfully agreed for a small amount of money to replace what
they felt was a faulty compressor.
And they did so and about 30 hours later the refrigerator was not any colder than it had
been before they got there.
What did you think of that?
And I opened the freezer and the ice cream was like mush and my popsicles were still
melted and I thought after 30 hours something exciting should have happened.
So I called the 800 number and I got a woman who was very understanding and I proceeded
in my own style to explain to her.
Not Frankistanza.
No, I didn't lapse into Frankistanza until my wife began to disagree with me.
I said to her, the refrigerator was fixed two days ago.
My wife says, it was a day and a half.
To which I said, alright, it was a day and a half!
And I said, and the temperature won't go below 50.
My wife says, oh no, it's down to 46.
Alright, I think it's 46 degrees 46 is good
46 good enough for you and we went like the Costanzas back and forth we argued
for and the poor woman on the other end didn't know what to make of it but she
sent the repair person out first thing in the morning I might add that it's
still not fixed but we're hoping they're working it this week before anyone else in the house gets sick
Anyway, I feel better about that now, too
What was your question Kevin? I'm gonna explain to him. I got what we're talking about. What was this question?
We don't remember all the click you start the engine
Put your left foot on the brake pedal put the car in drive
Keeping your foot firmly on the brake pedal with nothing in front of
you that you could possibly do harm to.
Okay.
Right.
Yeah.
Put your GE refrigerator right in front of this thing.
Step on the gas.
Or yours.
In other words, you're going to load up the engine, and in doing so, I believe, you're
going to get it to go click, click, click, and then shift it into reverse and do the
same thing, and you will also get click click click
But if you don't going back into drive and doing it again will allow you to reproduce the noise like you get when the vehicle
Is moving I believe
and if you can do this you can then drive it to your mechanic and
Reproduce the sound for him and you'll be able to figure out in a few seconds
I mean you could service manager is standing right in front of the car when you do
I mean you could for example have a bad constant velocity joint out in a few seconds. Make sure the service manager is standing right in front of the car when you're doing it.
You could, for example, have a bad constant velocity joint, but I rather think it's a
bad motor mount or it may just be a loose flange on the exhaust.
I like the flange.
Hey, is the constant velocity joint the same thing as a CV joint?
That's it, man.
CV, constant velocity, or curriculum VTi, whichever you like.
Oh, I'm brilliant, I see.
Hey, can I ask one more question? Sure. When my car is parked on an incline
and I get in the car turn it on
Put it in reverse. I hear a horrendous
Clanking noise. I keep I keep thinking that the entire underneath of the car is gonna fall out. You have a broken motor mount
That's what's making you noise now. Now. It's all clear to me
fallout. You have a broken motor mount that's what's making you noise now. Now it's all clear to me. Should have started with the second question.
Should have started with the second question first we could have gotten rid of you 10 minutes ago.
But I'm so charming. See you Kevin thanks for your call it's been a pleasure. Thank you gentlemen.
Thanks for talking to you Kevin. Bye bye. Well you've squandered another hour of your fleeting
summer. Yes I am. It is indeed. Listening to Car Talk, our esteemed producer is Doug the Subway Fugitive, not a slave to fashion. Punk and Lips, Jens
Nieher, Berman, our associate producer and dean of the College of Automusicology is
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We're Click and Clack the Tappet Brothers, and Don't Drive Like My Brother.
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Bye-bye. the Tappan Brothers and don't drive like my brother. Don't drive like my brother. We'll be back next week. Bye bye.
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