The Best of Car Talk - #2476: Houston, We Have a Problem!

Episode Date: September 21, 2024

When John called us from '200 miles north of Hawaii'' it took Click and Clack a minute to realize he meant 200 miles 'straight up'. Boy, NASA budget cuts get must be bad if they're calling us for help. Houston definitely has a problem on this episode of the Best of Car Talk.Get access to hundreds of episodes in the Car Talk archive when you sign up for Car Talk+ at plus.npr.org/cartalkLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

This message comes from Nespresso. Your morning ritual is the key to a great day. Elevate it with the quality and simplicity of Nespresso coffee. Customized to your liking, Nespresso has a coffee for every mood, every taste, and every morning ritual. Give yourself an unforgettable taste for an unforgettable morning. Visit Nespresso.ca to learn more or a Nesp espresso boutique near you. Hello and welcome to Car Talk from National Public Radio with us, Click and Collect the Tabard Brothers and we're broadcasting this week

We're gonna get in trouble for this The Department of Linguistics here at car talk Plaza now we have the actual we are gonna get in trouble But we're in trouble already right well. This is it's all in fun right we have actual news this week The school board in Detroit, Michigan has declared mechanics English in The school board in Detroit, Michigan has declared mechanics English an official second language. Detroit is the nation's first school system to recognize mechanics English, also known as Greasebonics, as the official language of the car repair industry and as a language separate from standard English, the unique characteristics of which are as follows.

Here it is. Greasebonics inserts a word I'll refer to as blank because I'm not allowed to say it on on NPR already place already place for that matter Yeah And home in front of each of a sentences verbs and nouns regardless of the number of verbs and nouns in the sentence So for instance here ready here's an example. I'll give you okay. Go you do it He's got a problem with his clutch becomes in Greece bornix. He's got a blanken problem with his blanken clutch. I've heard that. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Now you may also see the same word blank used as a Lytotes, which would give you a sentence like this. He's got a blanken problem with his blanken clutch, it won't dis blanken engage. So that's the sentence structure.

And there are, there are also idiomatic differences between Greasebonics and standard English, complete sentences that sound different. For example, in Greasebonics, no, I'm sorry, I'm not able to hand you that wrench at the moment becomes, what do I look like, you're blank and butler, et cetera, et cetera. I mean, we could go on and on, but we're already.

Well, I think, I think it is an official language because the truth is that every mechanic in the world speaks it and understands it perfectly, probably understands it better than any other sort of form of English. Well, I will admit it does help you alleviate the frustration inherent in diagnosing and repairing cars. It does, I don't know what it is about it. It does, I mean language has more purpose than simply communication.

Yeah. I mean, it's kind of therapeutic. Well it does, it has the therapeutic effect because it makes you feel better if you can say, this blanking clutch isn't working, as opposed to this darn clutch isn't working. And I don't know, I mean, if you have a question for us about your car you can call us at one eight hundred three three two nine two eight seven

hello your own car talk that carline and i'm calling from uh... homer alaska what's happening i have a um... and nineteen seventy eight toyota uh... pickup truck that uh... well i bought it in oct October and I've had several things happen to it but last time I drove it I could drive it with a full tank of gas

only. If it got down below anywhere below full tank of gas I couldn't drive uphill with it I'd have to turn around and drive up backwards. So you would actually back up the hills? Uh-huh. It would go uphill, frontward all the time, or the normal direction, until I started putting weight in the back of the truck, and I put a greater blade in for traction. Do all the wackos move to Alaska? No.

Were you born in Alaska, or you know no I'm gonna punish me we're bad broke you school the nuns send you 18? Yeah. I hate the pride, but what the hell are you doing there? I think my parents are still wondering that same question. They're there too? No. Oh, they're not there. They're in California, right? No, no, they're in Washington.

Washington. Uh-huh. So what... Yeah, like I said, I hate the pride, but why did you move there? And give us a day in the life of Carla from Homer. Oh, no! Come on! Well, you went there seeking what can we give us a day in the life of Carla from Homer? Well, you went there seeking adventure, huh? I did I could have told us you're from San Diego We wouldn't have asked you any of these questions, but you devolved you from Homer And now you're gonna have to spill your guts. Oh, it was an accident. I was on my way

I was actually moving out of my hometown to which is Eastern Washington, to the west coast of Washington State. Yeah. And I detoured. You got lost. With a friend in February of 1978 and it didn't look that far on the map so we drove here. Male or female friend? Male. Male friend, yeah.

Yeah, he ditched you, right? He's gone. No, she ditched you, right? He's gone. No, she ditched him. He was gone in 1979. Yeah, he's long gone. One winter was enough to get him out of there. What are you, crazy? And you, but you liked it.

I liked it. I used to like it a lot better. I like it, I would like it better if I was gone out of here for a month or so. Are you ready to come home now, Carla? Yes. I want to go home. Would you like us to help you fix your truck so you can drive home? Will you promise that you'll drive home if we tell you how to fix the truck?

And stay home? My mother would be so happy to hear this. How long will it take to get to see Mom? Like 20 hours? Oh, if I drive straight through. Figure out three breakdowns. No, no. if you drive straight through, you can meet... If I can drive in forward straight through, I could get there in three days, but if I have to drive in reverse, it'll take me at least a week. You can meet Sergeant Preston in Dawson.

Three days? Three days, that's, I think, how much time it took last time, but, you know, we stopped and ate and slept a little bit. Alright, let's get to work then. What was the problem? Won't climb a hill in forward gear. Won't climb a hill in forward gear. Unless the gas tank is full.

And the reason it won't climb the hill is that your fuel pump is probably not working anymore. Now you can tell us you put a new fuel pump in, but I know you didn't. No, you're kidding. Your fuel pump is not sucking the gas out of the tank, and by driving the thing up the hill backwards, you're relying on gravity to convey the fuel from the tank to the carburetor. That makes sense. But when you go the other way, you've

got to actually pull the gas uphill along with the truck. Yeah, it didn't work. Because the tank is where? Behind you. Behind me. And the fuel pump can't do it. I mean, you could have a busted fuel line, too. You could have a rupture or even a pinhole in the line between the pump and the tank and that would accomplish the same thing. It would give you an adequate fuel supply. Do you have a halfway decent mechanic?

I am a halfway decent mechanic. You are. Okay. You are she. You are it. Alright. So you're gonna just go out and you're gonna buy yourself a fuel pump and you're gonna put it in yourself. You're going to just go out and buy yourself a fuel pump and you're going to put it in yourself? Yes. Alright, so you never gave us a day in the life of Carla from home. Do you have a job? Yeah, I do it. Not a real job, not this time of year.

I work, in the summertime I work for the Department of Fish and Game. That's only two days. What do you do the rest of the year that's only two days when you do the rest uh... work on my truck well carla i gotta tell you but you've got to move back to civilization you are depriving humanity of what sounds like a very wonderful person yeah so it's a bit of pleasure talking to you and you should move back to

civilization where one else can enjoy a company to yeah Yeah. Hey, well, thank you. Because I wouldn't mind having coffee with you, kid. Oh, well, you don't have any other brothers, do you? No, I got one. Me too. I got one brother and his wife would be more than happy to get rid of him. Well, we can have coffee.

We don't have to have... It doesn't have to be amorous. Come on. We can just have coffee. You've been up there too long. Lighten up, will ya? It doesn't have to be amorous. Come on. You can just have coffee. You've been up there too long. Lighten up, will ya? Carla, try to find a warm place and do this job soon.

And give me a call when you get to Washington. Okay. We'll meet you for coffee. Good luck. See you, Carl. And call your mother! Oh, I will. Bye-bye. Thanks.

Bye. My God. 1-800. Homer, Alaska. I mean, you have to ask. I had to ask. I mean, I know it wasn't polite. I mean, you have to ask.

What the hell is she doing up there? I mean, come on! Hey, hey. I mean, you have to ask, what the hell is she doing up there? I mean, come on! Hey, hey, the puzzler answer and more calls are coming up right after this. Now Our Change will honour 100 years of the Royal Canadian Air Force and their dedicated service to communities at home and abroad. From the skies to Our Change, this $2 commemorative circulation coin marks their storied past and promising future. Find the limited edition Royal Canadian Air Force $2 coin today. Celebrate the women who shaped music

history with NPR's new book, How Women Made Music. From Beyonce to Odetta, Joan Jett to Dolly Parton, this beautiful book is filled with interviews, original writing, illustrations, photos, and more. Also available as an audiobook featuring interview excerpts with legendary musicians. Visit npr.org slash how women made music to pre-order now. Every day, technology changes how we live. Shortwave wants you to feel empowered and informed in navigating these new tools. From AI to precision medicine to quantum computing, face the future with confidence. Listen to the Shortwave podcast from NPR. If you're hearing this, that means you haven't gone sponsor free with NPR plus.

Join us on the plus side for awesome podcast perks across more than 20 NPR podcasts, including bonus episodes, behind the scenes content, sponsor free listening and more. Learn more and sign up at plus.npr.org and never hear this promo again. Okay, quick. What was last week's puzzle? I have no idea. I was on a roll there for a while. I know. I was... It's New Year's Eve! It's a New Year's Eve puzzle! It has to do with January 1st!

I have no idea. I don't know. Here it is. New Year's Eve. There's a party. Still don't know. Aw man. There's a party. Go ahead. A bunch of people attend this party. A big party. Big number of people. 60, 70, 80 people.

Only 10 were invited. I know how it is. Anyway, at this party, they all had the stuff, you find it in New Year's Eve party, there's champagne for champagne, toast. It's coming back to me. Oh! People die, people die!

Death! Right, right. There's the fruit punch with ice cubes and various pieces of rotted fruit floating in it, plus hors d'oeuvres, desserts, and stuff like that. In any case, one of the guests comes to the party, but leaves early. But before he leaves, he partakes of all the above-mentioned items. He has a glass of champagne, a glass of fruit punch, he tries every one of the appetizers

and desserts, but he leaves hours before the other guests. Yeah. You got the stage, the stage set. I got it. The next morning. The next morning, all the other guests are found dead by the butler. He had the night off because it was what?

Never received. Never received. So he staggers in at five in the morning, and all the other guests are gonzos, poisoned by something they ate or drank at the party. And yet, and yet, the guy who left early, even though he ate and drank everything that everyone else did, survived. Now he wasn't immune to the poison or anything like that, and there was indeed poison that was introduced by one of those foods. And yet he probably didn't ingest any of it.

Probably didn't ingest any of the poison? No. Because I got it. This guest was a dog. No. This guest was an alien. No. That would make him immune. All the hints, all the information is embedded. I give up. Fruit punch with rotten fruit and ice cubes, champagne, da da da da. The poison was in the ice cubes. Because he was one of the first guests, he had a glass of punch.

The poison didn't have a chance to mingle with the punch because the ice cubes had melted. It was only subsequent drinkers of the punch who were poisoned. Wow! Who's our winner, Tommy? The winner is Katherine Girard from Townsend, Tennessee. Oh, I have one of those too, an application for residency in the state of Tennessee. And for having her correct answer chosen at random

as our winner this week, our pal Katherine gets a Chad's House of Croissants Car Talk T-shirt, which is a beautiful deep blue t-shirt Chad's logo is crossed out with a bright yellow X and then we written car talk from NPR above and below it And as you said before if you're tired of really good-looking t-shirts with artistic aspirations, you will love this baby Yes, you will nothing pretentious about this not about this little simple little You will. Nothing pretentious about this little t-shirt. Nothing pretentious.

It's just a simple little, beautiful, beautiful t-shirt. Anyway, we have a new puzzler coming up during the second half of Car Talk, so be sure to stick around for that. It might be good. You never know. In the meantime, you can call us at 1-800-332-9287. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Yeah, hello.

This is Ira in Beverly Hills. Ira. What's up, man? Well, I tell you, I've got this Cherokee. It's a Jeep Cherokee. A 1987 Jeep Cherokee. I had it since it was new, you know? My wife thought I'd smell some gas. I didn't smell any gas, you know, for months. I didn't smell gas. Yeah. Couldn't find any gas, but she's smelling gas. Well, finally, I do smell it it and it's an injector is leaking

not actor so i go to uh... the dealer first because they say you gotta go to the dealer even the most car and he said you have to change all the injectors you can't just change one for ninety dollars a pop plus side uh... two hundred dollars in labor that adds up to you know about like nine hundred dollars for a cheap that's uh... only worth i don't know about five thousand dollars right what why do you

have to change all of those that's what we have to be a block yeah well it was it was it was fine now i couldn't figure out that i asked him why you can only why can't just just change one injector what question tomorrow and they started giving me this story like it's uh... it goes against nature or uh... but balance

uh... of uh... of the inject or go one of another one will start leaking soon anyway you might as well uh... change your mall you know balance is good but it was gas was starting to leak pretty bad So I didn't have much choice. So you did all the injectors you did. Yeah, I had to Because my wife was starting to smell this gas and he said he's gonna catch on fire and you know, you'll burn to death Didn't have any choice I love it. Well,, I mean, it is a matter of balance. And if you're getting less fuel going into one of the cylinders than you're getting into the other cylinders, then they were obviously not all fire with the same oomph.

And if that happens, first you'll have some kind of performance degradation, which on a 100,000-mile Cherokee, I would guess, would be insignificant enough that you would never notice it. Well he said that if you don't change your ball the others because you're gonna change one the others are gonna start leaking anyway soon. So when they start leaking you replace those well yeah considering that you've already done it. The others don't know what's happening to this one. They don't. No. So if you replace one, that's not going to increase the probability of the others leaking. The only reason the others are going

to leak is because they're as old as this one. So I mean... So the logic is very simple. When the thing's 100,000 miles old, the five that remain may be all plugged up and the spray pattern is incorrect. But so what? But so what? They were all lousy to begin with and you didn't notice any difference. and I will say I've never replaced an injector on a Cherokee to the best of my knowledge it may be that when you replace one you make the other five leak but I've replaced plenty of injectors on plenty of other cars and I've done just one or two or whatever was required because they are expensive well if you've never replaced any on a Cherokee

it means they probably don't leak very often because you got plenty of customers who have Cherokees that means the stock of Cherokee injectors is very very high they've got too many well that explains the low price and that's why they're trying to push them and they're trying to get rid of as many as they can so everyone that comes in with one leaker get six next time you drive by the jeep deal you'll see a sign inject a special buy one get one free well uh... you know anything wrong but i don't think you needed to replace all six of them i would have gone for just the one that was leaking but well there

you are there you are but it's only five hundred bucks and you live in beveley hill so you must have it anyway uh... apathy the cat the cat you kid you know this is a tough life here and listen I want to tell you I listen to you guys all the time really no kidding and uh you're just great I mean there's no two ways about it. Thanks Ira. Thanks a lot fellas. Thanks for calling. Bye bye. 1-800-332-9287 hello you're on Car Talk. Hi this is Ross in in seattle i was what's up well i i'm wondering about the effect of park color on bird excretory behavior haha

because i'm not sure of the situation has been written on the subject and i i've been conducting in involuntary controlled experiment uh... i have had to cars that were identical except for color. In 94 I bought an accurate GSR four-door which is a wonderful car and I really loved it and I drove it for 15,000 miles about a year and then tragically it was an accident and was totaled and it was dark green and I drove it parked at home it's parked in the garage at work it's parked on the street and I've drove it in the

same places parked it in the same places parking in same places and as the one i have now when the person was wrecked i bought a ninety-five and at the time i needed a new one white was the only one they had and i took away all kiss of death and this car this white car had had more bird do on it then all of the cars ever owned in my it you know my whole life it's just a bird do magnet and i can figure it out i mean

from the air these two cars look the same in terms of their outline except one was creating one was white and well what car ever on no one one certainly is more of a beacon showing up at the birds aim necessarily but who knows what goes through a bird's little pea brain. I've wondered if there's some sort of infrared you know bullseye that only birds can see. Yeah right on the roof of the car. How good is their aim? I mean have you ever seen, first of all, have you ever seen a bird in the act? No I haven't been able to catch it. No one ever has. No one ever has. And from what height do they release their cargo? Yeah, I mean can they do it at any height for example? And can they do it when they're under power or must they coast? These are important questions. Well you know I even have a car cover for this car that's light green and they did in the summer which

good good yeah half here in Seattle I put the car cover on it and they don't poop on that because it's light green and they did in the summer with good good yeah half year in seattle i put the car cover on it and they don't poop on that uh... because it's like green well i mean i have no idea i can't i find it hard to believe that they're actually thinking about it when they do it i mean you're ascribing to them some kind of you know determination they looking down as a hot there he is i'm gonna go down and saying, uh-huh, there he is. I'm

going to go down and poop all over his car. Well, the only explanation, I mean, the two cars are identical except for one of the green and one of the white. Sure, no, I agree. It's certainly a mystery. But it certainly would seem as though that what they're doing is almost involuntary. I doubt Linkin' thinking about it. You would think so. Without close examination, you would think that it's involuntary. But I'm not so sure. And I think we're going to need help from some of our listeners to find this important

information. I even logged onto your website and didn't find any information on it. Post a note. What did you use for a keyword? Poop? You look up the keyword poop and you'll find something. Yeah. Yeah, most of our columns probably. And a picture of my brother.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think I would like people to let us know either by writing to us via email, snail mail, or going on Cartock.com and go into Cafe Datra and we'll try to have a box, a booth set up just for this issue. This is, wow, this is one of the mysteries of the decade. Right. Right.

This is a burning issue. This is almost as important as jock itch. It is. Yeah. Yeah. And the heartbreak of psoriasis. Thanks, Ross. You're welcome. We'll look into it. See you later. All right.

Bye-bye. Bye. He's right. Isn't it interesting how people notice stuff? I mean, there's so much going on. It's impossible to have any idea what's going on. I don't think you'd notice more bird poop on a white car than, say, a green car. I think you'd notice it on any car.

I think you'd probably notice it more on a green car. Yeah, it's predominantly what? White? Oh, we know. Depends on what kind of birds. There have been down-to-world dissertations. And what their diet is. What their diet is. Exactly. Don't move because more calls and the new puzzler are coming right up. 2. Wilderness is changing. More wildfires, more people, more cell service. The How Wild podcast hits the trail to explore the history of wilderness, how it's changing, and what that says about us as humans. Listen now to the How Wild podcast from KALW, part of the NPR Network. I'm Danielle Kurtzleben. I cover the presidential campaign for NPR. So I go to rallies, a lot of them. I want to hear what the candidates say, talk to voters, and find out what ideas

are resonating. And I put it all in my reporting to help you make sense of this election. It's why being there is important. To help support this work, sign up for NPR+. Go to plus.npr.org. Look, raising a teen is tough. You know, it's always been hard to be a teenager and it's always been hard to raise a teenager. I think a lot of parents feel like their kid has broken up with them. But this school year can be different with Life Kit's guide on supporting your teenager. Listen to the Life Kit podcast from NPR.

On this week's episode of Wild Card, musician Casey Musgraves explains how she's tried to slow down time. I'm kind of drinking each day, each moment in, and I'm trying to not like wish myself to the next whatever's on the horizon. I'm Rachel Martin. Join us for NPR's Wild Card Podcast, the show where cards control the conversation. Hi, we're back. You're listening to Car Talk on National Public Radio with us, clicking clack the Tappet brothers, and we're here to discuss cars, car repair, and an application for residency.

Now, we should point out. I'm gonna point it out right now. I didn't write this. I don't know anything about it. I don't even know who it came from. It's blame it on the Internet. However you have bad enough taste to read it. All right here's an application for residency and I won't mention the state because we'll let them figure it out for themselves I mean, I suppose if you live well if you can answer the questions, then you know, what's your state? So I will not mention the name of the state and I will not mention who sent me this but I You're right. I do have the bad taste to at least read it and here it is

Okay first name and this is this is not that you fill in these are all multiple choice. Your name has to be one of these. Name you check off Billy Bob, Billy Joe, Billy Ray, Billy Sue, Billy May and Billy Jack. Check appropriate box it says. Age, sex, shoe size, occupation. Check off the appropriate box. Farmer, mechanic, hairdresser, unemployed. That's the only choice you can get. How about vice president?

Was that one of the options? Do you own or rent your mobile home? That's good. Do you own or rent your mobile home? Are you might as well jump in with both feet I want everyone to know that I have nothing to do with this Number of times you have seen a UFO number of times you have seen Elvis. That's it. All right, look. Stop! Before my brother gets us in further trouble by naming a state. No, I'm not going to do that. You have a few in mind though, don't you? I do. Yeah, well, I won't let you say anything. have a few in mind though, don't you? I do. Yeah, well, I won't let you say anything.

All right. We're gonna go with... 1-800? Oh, we're gonna do the puzzle. No, no, no, we're gonna go to the puzzle. Before I do that, I have to make a correction from a puzzler of a couple of weeks ago. The moment the blackened headlight... Half-blackened headlight.

Right, half-blackened headlight. Several people, including my father... Oh, yeah. ...and Fred Glass... No kidding. And about six million listeners pointed out an error in the answer. Now I got this little puzzler from some history book

that I read about Cape Cod. Yeah. Where in fact I saw this headlight and the information was wrong and not thinking about it. This was all about the headlight that you found in an antique shop and the top half of it was painted black. Right, and it was during WW2.

Right. And the answer I gave without thinking about it was that they were worried about German aircraft seeing the headlights, but of course it wasn't that at all. It was because there were no German aircraft that could make it that far. Oh. Germans didn't have any aircraft that could fly across the ocean, to the best of my knowledge, nor did they have any aircraft carriers. They were worried about U-boats. Ah, but I don't got no boats. You got the U-boats, mind your own.

Here's the new puzzler. I'm going to pay attention here. Customer called to show up, they said, I've got a problem with my car. I don't know what's going on, but I pulled out of my driveway this morning, it parked in the street, and my car was leaning to the rear and to the right. So he said, something's wrong at the right rear. He said, I must have a broken strut or something.

So he said, a couple of months ago I was in and you guys told me I needed new struts and they were worn out and I think that's the problem. And I said, no, no, no, no, no. Worn out struts would never were worn out and I think that's the problem and I said no no no no no worn out struts would never cause this to happen you must have a worn a broken spring yeah gee I crawled under there and I looked he said and I don't see anything broken he said the spring doesn't look broken that's part of the strut that holds the spring doesn't look broken and I'm afraid to drive it so I'm gonna tow it in. So tow it in he does.

And sure enough it comes to the shop, comes off the tow truck and it's leaning back into the right. Is this guy's name Kramer? It's leaning back into the right and I drive it into the shop and I take a peek underneath and I don't see anything broken either. I said gee must have a broken spring. I take a peek underneath and I don't see anything broken either. I said, gee, must have a broken spring. I forget about the car. Oh. Oh, I can see it happening now. Hours later, it's level.

It's level. And I realize that he was right when he said he needed new struts. Exactly. What happened? I got it. Cool. Cool, huh? Pretty good, huh? Very good, very good.

If you think you know the answer, send it to us at Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge, Our Fair City, Math, 02238, or you can email us your answer from CarTalk.com by clicking on the Talk to Car Talk section. And if we choose your puzzler, we'll send you a Chad's House of Croissants slash Car Talk T-shirt named T-shirt of the Year by the Cambridge Alliance with a visually impaired. I mean, it is ugly, but it's unique. That's all I can say about it.

Yeah, that's good. If you'd like to call us for the question about your car, the number is 1-800-332-9287. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hello, it's Tom Ray, it's great to talk to you, this is John from Houston. Hi John. John, we can barely hear you. Okay, I'll speak up a little bit. Oh that's good.

I work for the government so I can't tell you too much, but I occasionally drive this government vehicle, it's one of those Rockwell things. Uh huh. And twice it's done a very funny thing and I thought maybe you guys could help me with it. What Rockwell thing? What is it like a... You mean like a spaceship?

You know, one of those Rockwell vans? Yeah, it's a little very funny thing i thought maybe you guys could help me with that well rockwell thing what is it like a like a spaceship of the end and the point that i've got a nothing on the line when i first started out it's not great

so it's really really well yeah and i want to go to the rockwell about two minutes though, for about two minutes. This is what I was puzzling. Yeah. Rough for two minutes. After the first two minutes, after this really rough ride, there's kind of a jolt. And then it runs smooth, but only for about six and a half more minutes. And at that point, the engine dies. The engine dies? Yeah, it just stops completely. Geez, you know, I hate to make any...

... two different vehicles by serial number, and both have done exactly the same thing. Oh, these vehicles have serial numbers. Well, I... I mean, different vehicles... I hate to be suspicious. I'm suspicious also. I hate to be suspicious, but this... but the whole... what would I call it? The sound coming from, from the telephone.

Yeah. Sounds so familiar. I mean, I expect you to say, yeah, you sound, you sound like Tom Hanks saying Houston, we have a problem. Where are you calling from John? Uh, just a second. Let me look. I'm, uh, about 200 miles north of Hawaii.

No, really? No kidding. How did they fish you into this deal? Well, this is a good deal. In fact, I'm in the vehicle as we speak. And it's probably running really quiet right now, huh? Yeah, it's running pretty quiet, I'd say. We're still going pretty fast, but it's very quiet. How fast are you going? Oh, about 17,500 miles an hour.

Boy, this thing must have some brakes, huh? This must be a Dodge Dodge. Holy cow! I can tell you this much much when we use the brakes they glow red hot oh i bet they do you know when i heard you i was gonna say

that this is the furthest distance from which we have ever received a call but that's probably not true you're only a couple hundred miles up right that's right uh... although we're talking through a picture satellite which is twenty five thousand miles away but i think i want to get to uh... to your perfect and i like that work out throughout our space station in the space station but right we heard we heard

that on the news of it now we are not a you the guy going in on the guy coming out uh... the the book that's delivering the guy who went up there to a manager all your academy got john blaha and word now and he's been up there for four months. So you're the taxi driver? So to speak. Now you've been up there for four days and it's clear that you've already run out of people to call because you've called us.

You called your wife, you called your mother and father. You talked to President Clinton. And now you said, who else can we call? Well, we're getting ready to eat dinner. I thought it'd waste a little time. Well, boy, this is an honor, an honor to hear from you. And good luck. How long are you going to be up there? We'll be up for about another five, days and uh... doing a lot of experiments

uh... actually so far the orbiter atlantis that we're on has been working flawlessly we got to orbit without any problems at all all the mechanical systems on board are working great and it's a very complicated vehicle well we have to ask you if you have another minute or so what do you drive when you're a civilian when you're on the ground? I have two cars, I have a Toyota 4Runner 1987, that also works great and a Pontiac Grand Prix. Yeah but none of them has the

acceleration of this thing huh? Nope and also not the miles yet another thing we could about sixty million miles uh... boy all the way i gotta say you guys have got good luck uh... i want to be a small technical institute up the river uh... about nineteen seventy seven at a great time being out by i think that other people are trying to pay a few bucks an hour and folks have When I was there in about 1977, I had a green Sunbeam Alpine, and I used to go to this garage

where I'd pay a few bucks an hour and some folks would help me fix it. And I think they sound kind of familiar. No kidding. No kidding. This wouldn't be John Grunsfeld, would it? Yep, that's me. Well the last time you were there, you didn't pay your bill. You have an outstanding bill of five bucks for Bay rental.

So if we have a forwarding address, we'll send it to you. Okay, you must remember my Sunbeam Alpine. I do remember your Sunbeam Alpine. Yeah, we're on three cylinders. Of course, how can we forget it? That was on a good day. That was on a good day. Boy, oh boy.

Well, I wish you a safe landing John. Good luck and I'm proud of you. And if you're bored and you want to talk again, feel free to call. Today's number is free. Okay well I appreciate it. Thanks very much. See you John. Thanks a million.

Bye bye. Pretty good. Whose idea was this? He did. Actually he sent us an invitation to the launch of this. Pretty good. Whose idea was this? He did. Actually, he sent us an invitation to the launch of this. Oh, he did.

That's right. He sent us an invitation and we, we said, and we said, come on, you nuts. Now he shows you what chickens we are. This guy's being hurdled into space at 18,000 miles. I think escape velocity is 18,000 miles an hour, or close to it, or something like that.

We were too afraid to get to a plane. To go down there and watch the takeoff. And fly to Cape Canaveral and watch the takeoff. We said, oh no, no, too scary. Well, his vehicle is probably a lot safer than the 727 you were gonna go down to Florida on. Yeah, probably. Well, that was pretty exciting.

That is, I mean, his voice did sound strange. Well, it was just so reminiscent. It was just like Houston, we have a problem. Yeah. And he was from where? Houston. Well, they must have those cheesy microphones and they've been using the same ones for 30 odd years

because they all sound the same. Wow. Yeah, there's a Hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 30 odd years because they all sound the same. Wow. That is a... Houston, this is John. That was pretty exciting. That is good. That's good. That's the most interesting call we've had in a little while. Yeah, I've never talked to an astronaut before, even when he was on the ground.

And he was a former customer of ours. Yes, and he still owes us five bucks, I'm telling you. I think he does. He sniffed us, and I think he stole a wrench, too Well, you've wasted another perfectly good hour Listening to car talk. Yes, you have Steam producer is Doug the subway fugitive not a slave to fashion Berman our binocular face associate producer Those have those been surgically implanted in Rogers the Binoculars?

Dean of the College of Auto Musicology is Ken Binocular face Rogers our engineer and assistant producer is Jennifer Jiffy Loeb our technical advisor is the old man himself John Bugsy Sebastian after 40 is he now mr. Height sweet cheeks 22 weeks free lunch dough and breath lawler and our summer intern who did all the work for the last eight weeks is Sarah Herzl. Who's leaving us today and boy is this going to be a sad day for Doug. For Dougie, yeah I know. Who's going to do all the work now Doug? I know he's looking for, he's got the sign out now. Ha, he's pointing at Ken.

Oh yeah, Roger's vacation is over so I'll have to do some work. Our public opinion pollster is Paul Murky of Murky Research. Our automotive medical researcher is Dr. Denton Fender. Our secretary of pain relief is Les Asprin. Our fleet manager is Oscar De La Rental. Our director of purchasing is Lois Bitter. Our staff nutritionist is Arlene Menuh. Get it? Our lean... You didn't laugh. I have trouble with that one. Our staff psychologist is Les Moody. The head of the buildings and grounds is Mo DeLon. Our staff geneticist is Dr. Gene Poole.

Our director of long-range strategic planning, as everyone knows, now is Kate Sarah, who's married to Frank Sarah, and now her driver's license says Revolt. The chairman of our math department is Horatio Algebra. Mr. Zizzi does our hair. And of course, our chief counsel from the law firm of Dewey, Cheetahman, Howe is Hugh Lewis Dewey, known behind the bars of Harvard Square as Huey Louie Dewey. We're Click and Clack the Tappin Brothers.

Don't drive like my brother. Don't drive like my brother. Thanks for listening. We'll see you next week. Bye-bye. Are you looking for something a little different in your 2024 election coverage? Here at the It's Been A Minute podcast, we look at politics from a culture perspective. We look at why name calling seems to be in, how influencers are changing the game, and how the candidates' fashion choices are redefining power dressing. We're giving you a different way to look

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