The Best of Car Talk - #2477: Holistic Car Care

Episode Date: September 24, 2024

Did you know that Click and Clack's roots in car care stretch back to 'hippie days' and their 'Hacker's Haven' DIY Garage? Ed was a customer then and remembers a few of the nutty approaches the boys took to educating beginner mechanics. Change your Patchouli oil & filter with us on this episode of the Best of Car Talk.Get access to hundreds of episodes in the Car Talk archive when you sign up for Car Talk+ at plus.npr.org/cartalkLearn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

On this week's episode of Wild Card, actor Jeff Goldblum sings his way through our conversation. One, two, three. One is the loneliest number. Two, oh just the two of us. We can make it three. Oh, we three, we're not alone. I'm Rachel Martin. Join us for NPR's Wild Card Podcast, the game where cards control the conversation.

Hello and welcome to Card Talk from National Public Radio with us clicking clack the tapper brothers and we're broadcasting this week From the Department of Civility here at car talk Plaza read the letter. We jerk Well, it's more than civility actually this is from Tom Burke B. Oh you are Que Bork I would say Bork. Yeah, dear who's it rhymes with Jork Bork I would say Bork. Yeah, dear who's it rhymes with Jork There who's it I've just read a bunch of letters sent to you guys and I noticed that almost without exception The letter writers insulted you

He noticed that I think that is mighty rude of them So I'd like to address a few words to those mean spirited letter writers dear mean spirited letter writers Just because it's true, do you tell your spouse that he or she is fat and ugly? Just because it's true, do you tell your boss that he's a moron? Just because it's true, do you look at yourself in the mirror and say you must be the most pathetic, worthless human being on the planet? Of course not! Right. So why pick on Tom and Ray? Right. Right! Just because they are in no position to poison your pancakes is no reason to be Right. So why pick on Tom and Ray? Right. Right! Just because they are in no position to poison your pancakes is no reason to be rude to these

ridiculous idiots. Backhanded, here. They deserve to be treated with the same silent contempt as judges and police officers. Save your cruel remarks for those who asked for it. Politicians. Tom and Ray may be stupid and obnoxious, but that is no reason to throw it in their faces. How about a little civility? There, I feel better. Well, that's very kind words.

Thank you, Tom. You're a sweet, sweet man. Yes, and compassionate and understanding and empathetic. Compassionate and a real jerk. Let me get that part again. Get this. Tom and Ray may be stupid and obnoxious. He didn't say are. May be. That's the best we've ever gotten.

Which obviously is immoral. It introduces an element of doubt. I feel honored. That's like the review we got. I feel warm and fuzzy now. Our little bluegrass band played at a benefit one time, and we're not the most accomplished musicians. No, we're not.

But the review we got in the newspaper was that we quote, weren't half bad. We were thrilled. We thought we were all bad. I framed that. I have it up on my wall. Not half bad. He called me up right away, did you read that? So I think we have made great strides in the last few years. At least we all start at the same time and

We end at the same time what goes on in the middle is still up for grabs You have to take one step at a time one step at a time Yeah, if you have a question about your car We'll take one step at a time and trying to solve it our numbers 1-800-332-9287. Hello. You're on car talk Hey, this is Parker from Northampton. Hi Parker. Parker! Hi. As in Parker Lewis can't win or lose. Yeah, something like that. Where are you from? I'm from Northampton, Massachusetts.

Yeah, I know where that is. Yeah. So what's up? Well, so I got this 1967 Chevy Nova station wagon and I got it from this guy for $223. $223? What was it? It was $225, but I talked him down. Oh, you chiseled him down?

Well, that's the equivalent, Dashley, of getting them to knock off a few hundred dollars. Or a few thousand. On a real car. Yeah. Right. So yeah, you did great. Yeah. Well, so it's given me lots of of problems but i've managed to figure out most of them but on one time when i actually had to bring it to someone who knew more

about it that i did this mechanic told me that on something like uh... of broken rocker armor something like that in the engine now he said that uh... there was no way for it to be uh... repaired or like disengage so it then you could run on the rest of the funders

and uh... he said that it's gonna end up destroying itself like in a violent ugly death it's gonna it's gonna put a hole through the side of the engine and get it destroy itself and i just wonder if when my car died is it gonna take me with it is this gonna be like of dangerous accident this is a six-cylinder this is a six-cylinder engine right yeah this is a recent broken rocker arm i'm i'm pretty sure i'm not positive but

there's like a lot of taking sometimes well yeah i suspect you have a collapsed lifter but i mean a broken rocker arm is not going to throw itself through the side of the engine nor is a collapse lift how mean a broken rocker arm is not going to throw itself through the side of the engine nor is a collapsed lift How about a broken connecting rod? Okay, no cuz a rocker arm costs about ten bucks and it's trivial to replace yeah, you would have fixed that yeah, okay Well, then that must not this was something that was very expensive to repair, right? Yeah, he said the only way around it would be to get a new engine

Yeah, connecting rod and so he said it would be to get a new engine. Yeah, connecting rod. And so he said like it's gonna put a hole through itself and so I've been driving this car around all the time you know and I've gone like on the turnpike and everything. Oh you fool. Yeah, see that's what I wonder, am I being a foolish, naive, you know, is this another bad decision made?

All of those things, in fact you may be a moron the noted this is gonna really here uh... this is going to be quite an exciting thing when it happens okay that's the truth is i don't think you want to miss it yeah but i i i have almost experienced this

uh... i didn't throw a rod but i you should pardon the expression, sucked a valve. Wow. And the same thing happens the engine immediately stops. Mm-hmm. I mean immediately, just about as immediately as anything can happen. One second the engines going and then boom it stops and it makes a lot of noises. Yeah. It's pretty exciting. Yeah. but you probably won't get hurt unless, of course, you happen to be just pulling away from that semi that's coming down the highway and you're just crossing in front of it. You're cutting off a semi.

Yeah. Then you're sure you could get hurt. Right. But I mean, that could happen by running out of gas. I mean, that could happen with all kinds of things. That'd be an indirect result of the engine failing. Exactly, but not as a direct result of the engine failing are you going to die. Alright, sounds good. Yeah, just as my brother enjoyed sucking his valve. Well you know this reminds me of my father-in-law's theory of life and death.

Which father-in-law? Father-in-law number three. Father-in-law number three says, I mean, people have been telling him for like maybe 50, 60 years that he's overweight. And his theory is it's better to be overweight. He said because us big guys, we don't linger. We get a heart attack and boom! Or a cerebral hemorrhage or something like that. We're gone in a second, just like throwing a rod. Oh yeah, that's the way you want to go. He said other people, they do the jogging and they watch their diets. He said, and pretty soon they're lying in the hospital dying of nothing. And they linger and they linger.

Of course you muscle them by definition because there's nothing wrong with you. So you get all these horrible diseases sooner or later and all your family has to worry about you, come to visit you in the hospital. He says when I go, they're not even going to know it. Bingo. Gone. I can see the bumper sticking out. Eat heavy, don't live long enough to get sick. Don't live long enough to get a horrible disease. And he's right. He's a brilliant man, that father-in-law number three. Parker, don't linger. Go out and drive this thing at 80. Let us know what it sounds like. See you later. Okay, bye. 65. 65 is

the speed limit in North Canada. Hey, we've got more calls. And ready for this? The puzzler ads are coming up right after this, so don't go anywhere. Georgia delivered a narrow victory to President Biden in 2020. On NPR's Consider This podcast, we'll look at where things stand four years later with a new presidential candidate on the ticket. It is enough to flip the election, and that is why everybody's voice is important. Hear what Georgians think about issues like voting access and what that could mean for the election this week on the Consider This podcast from NPR.

On how to do everything from the team at Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, we try to find the answers to all your burning questions. I'd like to know how do I get someone to tell me if I smell? That's the perfect question for us. So we went over to her house and we sniffed her. Because we care. Listen to the How to Do Everything podcast from NPR. We'll sniff you too. Summer is over. You're spending more time in traffic

and the calendar is more full than ever. There is also a presidential election to keep track of. But fear not, NPR's Daily News podcast, Consider This, can keep you up to date on the election and all of the other important things happening in the world. Listen to Consider This wherever you get your podcasts. Hey there, this is Félix Contreras, one of the co-hosts of Alt Latino, the podcast from NPR Music where we discuss Latinx culture, music and heritage with the artists that created. Listen now to the Alt Latino podcast from NPR. All right.

Talk about interesting. I know it was your New Year's resolution to remember every puzzler. But since January is basically over, I'm sure that one's out the window. Yeah, I don't remember. I was doing pretty well for a while there. Well, I know why you blew this one. No numbers. Ah, well, then I don't feel guilty. If there are no numbers, then I don't even try. Well, here it is. A customer called into the shop the other day and said, I've got a problem with my car.

I don't know what's going on, but I pulled it out of the driveway this morning and parked it on the street. And the car is leaning back and to the right. Oh, yeah, I remember this. So he said, something's wrong with the right rear. I must have a broken strut or something. And he went on to mention, he said, a couple of months ago, I was in, and you guys told me my struts were all worn out

and I think that must be the problem. And I said, no, no, no, you knucklehead. Worn out struts would never cause this to happen. You must have a broken spring. Mm-hmm. Or a broken control arm or some such thing. He said, gee, you know, I crawled under there and looked and I didn't see anything broken.

I'm gonna have it towed because it doesn't appear that it's safe to drive. So tow it, he does. Sure enough, it arrives at the shop, the tow truck drops it off. No, it was on a ramp truck. He lowers it down onto the floor of the garage, and certainly the thing is leaning back and to the right. Okay. So I drive it into the shop, into a bay rather, and I take a peek, and I look underneath, I don't see anything broken. I said, Hmm, but he must have a broken spring.

I guess I just can't see it. And I forget about the car. Few hours later, I happened to look over and it's fixed. And I realized that he was right that he needed new struts. Yeah. What happened?

I got it. I got it. I got it. Temperature. Temperature, what had happened and I obviously left out a few essential in my attempt to obfuscate the thing. Of course you did. I had to leave out a few essentials. He had driven, on the day before, he had driven the car and indeed his struts were blown shot to pieces Yeah, so the extent that the fluid the hydraulic fluid had leaked out and been replaced by water He drives the car and parks it in his driveway, which must have somehow Exerted pressure on the spring of the right rear wheel to compress it and in doing so it changed the the rear wheel to compress it and in doing so it changed the the way the suspension sat and it froze because it got very cold that night. Got it. And the shark

absorber was frozen in a position that it maintained the spring compressed. Exactly. He backs out of the driveway and sees it's leaning back and to the right and he must assume that the spring is broken but it isn't broken it's compressed it's towed to the shop and in the hours that it sat there it thaws out right and the spring pushes back up to where it's supposed to be and bingo the thing is fixed you what an opportunity you had to charge him oh I got your car fixed Frank yeah spring thaw the A spring thaw! That's very good. Pretty good puzzler huh? Yeah, that was good. Yeah, that was good. That was very good. Wow, that wasn't very good. And we probably have a winner. A winner. Here it is, written on this little scrap of paper.

The winner is Douglas Grant GRANDT from Summit, New Jersey and for having his correct answer chosen at random as our winner this week Douglas is gonna get his very own CD copy of the best of car talk the second Version second best of car talk the CDs free Doug the special CD player that you're gonna need to hear it is $700 and you can only get it from us. You can only get it from us because it turns backwards dollars you can only get it from us because it turns backwards now we have a new puzzle coming up during the second half of car talk and it is a quasi automotive puzzler so stick around for that in the meantime you can call us at 1-800-332-9287 hello you're on car talk hi this is Heidi from Logan Utah hi

Heidi Heidi Logan yes that's something my lifelong dream to be on car talk It's no kidding and to get out of Logan That's the second one. Yeah, how old are you with lifelong? I am 21. I'm a student at Utah State University Utah State, you sue Utah State University is usu Yes, who sue is that how you what do you guys call it there? Utah State Utah State that's better than usu usu yes usu is that how you what do you guys call it there? Utah State Utah State that's better than usu. Yeah, I was Japanese Yeah, go to usu state. What are you majoring in Heidi? I am an electrical engineering

Whoa, huh if you call me an e from usu. I don't know I might hang up on you from usu Now are you learning anything about electricity there in the electrical engineering program at usu well not yet But eventually I hope to I mean if they give you like Kirchhoff's laws and oh well that's even all that stuff They still about a week. I think in about a week. Yes. I think Kirchhoff's laws have been negated. They don't they don't work anymore Oh, okay. I'll tell my teacher Yeah, Kirchhoos Law is a bull. What do you mean? You're 21 years old, I mean you should be graduating like tomorrow. Oh yes, but I changed my major and got married and did all sorts of other things. Wow. What, from odd history to electrical engineering? No, it's from mathematics to electrical engineering. No kidding. All right, we've given you a hard enough time. Maybe we can help you.

Okay, I have this car. It's an 89 Mercury Tracer. I take it on road trips a lot, and I've noticed when I start going up the hill, the check engine light'll come on. And a couple times when it started happening, I think, oh no, my car is gonna fall apart. I oughta do something about this.

But now I've realized if I just take my foot off the gas for a second, and then put my foot back on the gas The check engine light will go off There you go. Okay. Well, thanks for letting us know that we'll tell the next caller To try the same thing That's good. This would be fine Except when I'm going up the hill this car doesn't handle hills well, and I need to get the momentum to go up the hill. But when I take my foot off the gap,

I lose all that momentum, and I start crawling up the hills. I'm going to guess you have 95,000 miles on this thing. Up a little more. 195,000. You're closer, yeah. Closer. Yeah. Yeah.

It's got about 200,000. Does it really? Yes. Well, first of all, I don't think i'd be too what the check engine like doesn't mean that anything is wrong with the engine what it means is that this is fuel injected this vehicle and it has various sensors that are reading certain uh... uh... things that are going on like the parameter

parameters yes will call the parameters call them part of the news that would hide because she she she should be a little parameters. I know a parameter. Yes. It's reading various engine parameters and it's determining what the fuel-air mixture should be under these different circumstances. For example, if the ambient temperature is this or the coolant temperature is that. And the throttle is 92% open as it is. And the airflow is this and the airflow temperature is this. And if one of those things, it's also reading the exhaust stream.

It's reading what's coming out of the engine as it's burning up the gasoline. And if one of those things is off, it'll turn the check engine light on. So it could be that one of your sensors is out of spec. And the one I suspect is the oxygen sensor, which I know you've never changed. Are you kidding? It may not even exist anymore. We've taken oxygen sensors out that were practically melted. Yeah.

But you can have the thing scanned. You can take it into your shop if you ever visit a shop. You can have somebody and somebody can scan it and figure out what's wrong with it. Will this cost me money? Yeah. Everything costs money. However, you don't have to worry. If the check engine light goes off when you reach the top of the hill, even if you keep

the thing flowing, by the time you reach the top the light's gonna go off. Is that not true? It doesn't. No, it stays on until I take my foot off the gas. It stays on until you take your foot off the gas. When the engine is idling, you're sitting there waiting for class to start, and you're sitting in the parking lot and the engine's running, how much does it shake? Not a whole lot. I know what the problem is. Not a whole lot.

When you're climbing a hill, a steep hill, you have your foot on the gas pedal all the way down and you never do that any other time. Right. That's probably true. I suspect you have a bad throttle position switch. Just a guess. Oh, that's good. Throttle position switch.

You might be able to duplicate the check engine light by taking the car on a flat road and flooring it. Of course, you might blow the engine up and do this. You might, but I suspect if you floor it on a flat road and open that throttle all the way up, just like you do when you're trying to climb a steep hill, the light will come on then too. I'll bet it won't. 50 bucks? just like you do when you're trying to climb a steep hill, the light will come on then too. I'll bet it won't.

50 bucks? Do I get to hold the money? What was I betting? Heidi's gonna... Oh, I was betting that it was not going to, that the light is not gonna come on. Heidi, you have to call us next week. Okay.

Get it on a flat surface, drive it with the wide open throttle for a few seconds, and then if it doesn't do it, do it again for a few seconds until the light comes on. Keep doing it until the light open throttle for a few seconds and then if it doesn't do it do it again for a few seconds It's my light comes on put it doing it till the light comes on Heidi Driving it the light comes on The light won't come on There's money in this for you

See I And don't listen to that Kirchhoff stuff you don't need. Didn't Kirchhoff's laws have like differentials in them? Oh, I don't think so. Isn't education great? You know what's even more impressive? How we've retained the stuff after all these years. I mean, if they brought us back in time, like 50, 60 years, we could invent all this stuff. We'd say, ah, I have something to do with the IDT, but I don't know what.

If you went back in time 100 years, You'd be useless. You'd be hard pressed to invent a baseball bat. I wouldn't be able to do anything. No, you wouldn't. As much as you know. They would lock you up because all you could do is to tell them about all the wonderful things

that you have seen, and you'd have no idea. Well that's why I believe that time travelers do exist, that there are people from the future that have come back and they all get locked up as being crackpots because they can't do anything either. They say, oh, you believe we have spaceships that fly around this? They say, oh yeah, they would. Can you make one? No.

What does it look like? I can't even draw one. How is it prepared? I don't know. How does it take off? I don't know that. How does is it? I don't know. How does it take off? I don't know that I don't know that either you press the button You watch it on television. What's that? And you wish you had paid more attention in that course, but you didn't because you didn't care about it Well, I didn't it went back. You still wouldn't care about it. No, I wouldn't know

You know what the problem with college education for males is? Don't get me started on that one. Well I just- Don't get me started! College education interferes with your social life. At the time of your life when you're most interested in females, what do they do? They send you to college. What's even worse, what's even worse is sending you to the army. I mean, Jesus, talking about cruel and unusual punishment.

Well. Okay, you're 18 and now you're interested in girls. The zits have cleared up in the whole bit. And now we're going to send you to the Army. Fort Dix, New Jersey. No, no, no. Yeah, or MIT. Come on, give us a break.

Yeah, no, colleges like MIT are too hard. You don't have any time to develop your social skills. And that's why most of the guys there still have, if you still have zits, they'll admit you. Because they know you're not gonna get any girls, right? That's why they wanna see you when they do the interview. Oh, you got zits, okay, you're in. You're in.

We'll be right back with more calls and the new puzzler after these messages. Okay, so tell me if this sounds like you. You love NPR's podcasts. You wish they weren't interrupted by sponsor breaks like this one. And you want to support NPR's mission of creating a more informed public. If this does sound like you, then it's time to sign up for perks across more than 20 podcasts with the NPR Plus bundle. Learn more at plus.npr.org. If you're hearing this, that means you haven't gone sponsor-free with NPR Plus. Join us on the Plus side for awesome podcast perks across more than 20 NPR podcasts, including bonus episodes,

behind the scenes content, sponsor-free listening, and more. Learn more and sign up at plus.npr.org and never hear this promo again. Need a binge listen? Check out the latest series from NPR's Embedded podcast. It's called Tested. Since long before the Paris Olympics, women in sports have been asked to prove their gender. There was chit chat about, is that really a woman? Listen to Tested, a new series from Embedded and CBC about the history and future of sex

testing in sports. All episodes are out now. I'm Elena Moore. I cover new voters for NPR. That means people who've never voted before, especially young people. Their numbers and power are growing. What issues do they care about? How do they feel? What they say can tell us where this election is headed. My job is to bring their voices to you. To help support our work, sign up for NPR dot org. National Public Radio with us clicking clack to Tappet Brothers and we're here to discuss cars, car repair and for lack of anything better professional

credentials. Professional credentials Bill Wolf says, Dear Tom and Ray a few weeks ago you raised an issue that has been bugging me for a long time the current glut of ill-mannered often unemployed PhDs who don't know how to introduce themselves. You quite properly heaped verbal abuse on some poor slob who introduced himself as Dr. So-and-so when calling to beg for free automotive advice. Remember him? Mm-hmm. Anyone attempting such a lame exercise on national radio deserves... I'd actually participate in this, but I need to do it right now, so all I can do is go, eeeh. That's okay. Just pay attention here. Boom! There'll be a quiz lately. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Professionalism, I love it.

Contrary to certain references on etiquette, the reason that PhDs should refrain from introducing themselves as Dr. Whozits has nothing to do with propriety or manners. It has to do with avoiding public ridicule by bozos like you guys. Ha ha ha ha! to do with avoiding public ridicule by bozos like you guys. Worse, one might actually be called upon to perform an emergency medical procedure like the professor of English who stuck doctor in front of his name on an airplane ticket. He was called from his seat and coached naturally to deal with some plumber who was having a heart attack in first class. I love I love it, but I digress. What prompted me to write this diatribe was the suggestion that one of you guys, Tom I believe, may actually belong to this august group.

Can this be so? If it is, why were you so reticent about flaunting it on the air? It obviously can't be because of good taste, natural modesty, or a sense of propriety. I suspect rather that your reticence, if indeed you are a PhD, reflects the pernicious influence of your brother. Just as many PhDs scheme to rub other people's noses in their academic achievement, many of their less accomplished siblings try to sap their confidence and undermine their efforts at shameless self-promotion

These pathetic spoil sports Because they obviously lack one quality that binds all PhDs together Pigheaded persistence in the face of all obstacles. That's true Tom if you have a PhD don't let your rotten brother shame you with hiding. Take your rightful place among this elite fraternity and brag about it. Suddenly, of course. Remember that even if it doesn't help you find a decent job, a PhD can always give you a false sense of confidence and self-esteem. Yours sincerely, Bill.

You don't have to call me Dr. Wolf. Well, I mean, I... Wow! Pernicious, pernicious, huh? It was innocent enough. I just merely made the statement one day when we had somebody who called and said he was Doctor so-and-so. Yeah, well, I agree. I asked if he was a real doctor, and he said, well, no, I'm not a PhD.

And I think it's bogus. There ought to be a separate designation, and it should be, hi, I'm Joe Blow, PhD, but I think it is awfully presumptuous if you were a PhD in art history to introduce yourself as a doctor. The title doctor should be reserved for physicians. Sure. And then it involves blood. If you do work with blood, you can call yourself a doctor.

Yeah, no, I go along with that. So veterinarians qualify. Veterinarians, definitely a doctor. Dentists, they do lots of blood. Dentists do blood. Yeah. Yeah, okay. You work with blood and guts. I'm a doctor of blood and guts. Other than that, you're a bum. I'm with it. All right, from now on, that's the new criteria. All right, it's time for the new puzzler. Yeah. And here it is. This was sent to us by John Pitts via cartalk.com. Good for him.

In Sweden, on a weekday in 1965 at 5 p.m., all traffic in the whole country stopped. A few moments later, it started up again and has never been the same since. What happened at 5 PM that day and why did it happen on a weekday? Wow. All right, I'm going to read it again. Read it again because I missed all the details. I'm going to repeat it again. Why don't you re-repeat it?

I'm going to re-repeat it. In Sweden, on a weekday in 1965 at 5 PM, all traffic in the whole country stopped. A few moments later, it started up again and it's never been the same since. What happened at 5 PM on that day and why did it happen on a weekday? This is a two-part question.

You have to get both parts correct to be a winner. Well, if you got the first part, this is interesting. It is. It is interesting. You know the answer? Yeah, you told me. Oh, you didn't figure it out for yourself, huh? No, I couldn't figure it out. Moron.

I may be a moron. Oh, I'm sorry. Maybe. If you think you know the answer, send it to us at Puzzler Tower, Car Talk Plaza, Box 3500, Harvard Square, Cambridge, MAH 02238. Or you can email us your answer from CarTalk.com by clicking on the Talk to Car Talk section. And if we choose your correct answer at random as the winner next week, and you catch us, we'll send you a second Best of Car Talk CD which you can foist on one of your sweethearts on Valentine's Day. Ah, good idea.

Right? My wife would love it. She can put it right next to the shop vac I gave her for our anniversary. You throw it right in the shop vac. If you'd like to call us with a question about your car, the number is 1-800-332-9287. Hello, you're on Car Talk. Hi, this is Ed from Bloomfield, New Jersey. Hi, Ed. Ed. I'm also from Brookline, Massachusetts. Really? It's been about 10 years up there

back in the mid-70s. Also, now you're in New Jersey in the Witness Protection Program. Yeah, sort of. Well, everyone in New Jersey is in the Witness Protection Program. We noticed. Especially in Brookfield. We're right in the heartland. Yeah, so what's wrong with your car, Ed? Well, anyway, I that uh... when i wasn't book one i was there going to northeastern university uh... i did also attend your car talk of preventive maintenance basic car maintenance program yeah i don't know if you give them anymore notes we'll have a set in front

to get the ask all the questions are really annoying guy yet to me yeah i remember that's me but uh... you gave it to the plate new age spiritual consciousness all you ever read the candles in the incense and all that i have made yet healing crystal that's the way that can insinuate yourself into the situation and the cellular healing crystal for your car it broke out of the world's the pyram like to have a mysterious problem though and jersey problem actually it's my son's problem new jersey recently bought a couple weeks ago

uh... ninety one chorus this is his first car buying on his own yeah and thirty four thousand miles on it and we're having a problem with it not starting those you turn the key and nothing at all happens just violence like a dead battery but the thing is that only happens

after the car has been run for a certain amount of time and then stopped briefly like to get gassed it to get speeding ticket uh... and that's what i thought that this is why we bought the part of the great ford or party for the two schools to invisible we get and that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i

think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i think that's what i And it happens randomly not every time but kind of intermittently that way and the way we restart the thing is you pull off The positive battery cable and put it back on then the car will start fine. It'll go

Really and you do nothing if you do nothing will it not stop for? It just sits there. Well, we've never sat on the side of the road for an hour What's the longest you've ever sat by the side of the road? Well, only 15, 20 minutes maybe. 15, 20 minutes, at which time you took off the battery cable, put it back on, and it started. Yeah, we fiddled around in there thinking, well, we started out by sort of, you know, just twisting it, thinking maybe the cable was bad. Yeah, well, that's good thinking. Well, I mean, I would certainly suspect the connection between the battery cable and the battery and pulling it on see the way

I think which is probably too complicated. I'm thinking of a microprocessor being you know rebooted This is basic stuff this is one of the remaining the only remaining pieces of the car that is truly old technology and that my brother still understands. And I still understand. Well, it's the only part that I understand because I took you course. Yeah, that's right. Well, basically, you have the ignition switch, which is the thing where you stick the key, okay?

Okay. And you have the starter motor and the battery and a solenoid. And in this case, because it's an automatic transmission, you have what's called a neutral safety switch. So when you turn the key you're trying to send current from the battery to the solenoid which turns the starter which makes the thing start but it has to go through the neutral safety switch first to make sure that you're in either park or neutral. So the problem could be the switch, it could be the starter, it could be the neutral safety switch, it could be the battery or one of the connections.

And I think it's the connection in your case. Okay. Just the cable itself? I think you have a crummy connection. Because when you take it off and put it back on, it starts right up, right? Yeah, it will. Hmm. I would clean those connections and if that doesn't solve the problem, if cleaning the terminal ends doesn't solve the problem, then the next time it doesn't start tow it someplace and they can immediately figure out what it is because they'll see if there's current getting to the solenoid. How old does this battery look? It doesn't look bad.

It looks clean. You know, there's never a lot of crud or anything on the terminals, but it may be original with the car. Well, I don't know. I'm going to guess that it's not the connection. From my vast knowledge of batteries, I'm going to say it's not the connection. From my vast knowledge of batteries, I'm gonna say that you need a battery. That's how I feel about this.

Sometimes I just have these, the healing of hands. Remember that chapter when we did the laying on of hands? Remember that? Yeah, I remember that. That was my favorite part. Yeah, remember that part of the class where we all put on the blindfolds and we went through everyone's pockets?

I remember levitating that horizon. it's all the other part of the last week we all put on the blindfolds we went to everyone's pockets yeah i remember we're taking a ride yeah that was quite an exciting moment for me you know well i'm gonna guess that when you take this could this to the group to the garage that looked at they're going to figure out that you need a battery

not only some ideas you have a good idea he's don't listen to him. I think you have a dying. He's a moron. You have a dying cell in that battery. And that would explain how that cell gets rejuvenated in the six seconds it takes you to remove the terminal and then put it back on, that cell springs back into life. That's right. There you go, okay, that's why, you never mind.

That's why we retired him early. We offered him early retirement. It has to do with the- Get out and stay out! With the laying on of hands. He's inadvertently laying his hands on that battery and that's what's making him come back to life. I'm still carrying some of that magnetism that I got in the course. Look my brother's analysis was a complete guess. I'm allowed the same liberty and it's the battery not the connection. I'm going for that. Call us back and let us know. Okay, I'll call you back and let you know. The reason it happens when it gets hard is

that the connection is not tight between the post of the battery and the terminal and as you, as the thing heats up, as you're trying to pump current, you ready for this? Yeah, man. From the alternator back into the battery, you're heating up the terminal and you know that when you heat up a ring, the hole gets bigger. And you're getting a poor connection and that's why it doesn't restart on. Fine! That also makes sense to me. I know it did. Everything makes sense to you when you're doing the chores. Most of your suggestions are pretty cheap to fix anyway. But we can do it all. Thanks for calling. Okay. All right. See you. Bye bye. everything makes sense well you've wasted another perfectly good hour listening to car talk

our steam producer has dug the subway fugitive that case has not yet been resolved i don't understand it there is no statute of limitations once he's left the jurisdiction, the clock stops. The clock stops running. Right. To the two minute warning. Our associate producer and dean of the College of Automusicology is Ken Babyface Rogers. Our assistant producer is Catherine Cathode-Ray. Our engineer is Karen Given. And our technical advisor who's been seen on milk cartons everywhere. Speaking of Kath O'Dray, our wives met Kath

O'Dray- John Lawler. Our wives met Kath O'Dray the other day for the first time. Yes, no, Monique had met Kath, Kathy. Oh, my wife had met Kathy only the other day. And her words were, how come she works for you guys? She's a really classy woman. And very intelligent too. Very intelligent. And how the heck does she put up with Berman all day? So, I'd mention that. Yeah, we've been wondering that ourselves, but who are we to ask? Who are we to ask? Is she stupid enough to stay here? What the hell are we? Every day she's not that classy.

She may be a moron. Our public opinion pollster is Paul Murky of Murky Research assisted by statistician Margin O'Vara. Our director of new product repair is Warren T. Myfoot. Our director of staff pay increases is Xavier Breath. Our staff butler from the Cartock-Bombay division is Mahatma

Coat. Our director of country Music is Stan Byron. Our Director of Monopoly Policy is Juan Morehouse. Our Director of Cold Weather Starting is Martina Never Turnover. And our Manager of Automotive Accessories is Francis Ford Cup Holder. Of course our Chief Counsel from the Law Firm of Dewey Chidin. How is you Louis Dewey? Known around the square as Huey Louie Dewey. Thanks so much for listening. We're Click and Clack the Tappet Brothers. And don't drive like myan Brothers and don't drive like my brother and don't drive like my brother we'll be back next week bye bye If you want a copy of this show on cassette, it's show number four. And you can get it on the World Wide Web by clicking on the Shameless Commerce Division

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