The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Biggest Problems 183

Episode Date: March 29, 2025

Vito, you got a little schmutz on your face. What? I don't know if you're aware of that. Oh no, that's not. Alright. That's a pro move. You missed a little bit. I got this penny taste in my mouth. Is it penny or is it gasoline? Is it diesel? It's a little something.

A little trickle, a little something. Yeah, a little sap in the back of your throat. Oh, we're gonna have a great show. Oh! Oh, we're gonna have a little something. It's a little trickle. A little something. Yeah, a little sap tin in the back of your throat. Oh, we're going to have a great show. Oh! Oh, we're going to have a great show. If it's a little something in the back of your throat, you're doing it wrong. A little something. A little tickle.

A little tickle. A little fun. What do you now want to do right now? Give me a list of things you don't want to do. I don't know. I don't know. I just want to. I just want to.

You can't even say it. I don't want to eat. I can't even say it. That's a number one thing you don't want to do. Yeah, it's true. He says, I'm going to eat, drink, or stop. I want to put on a headlamp and organize magic cards. freaking out and I was like I gotta all these magic cards I gotta organize them yeah so it's like two o'clock in the

morning and I didn't want to turn the lights on cuz sharing a hotel room with other guys and I had like one of those like lamps you wear and I'm just in the dark at 2 a.m. my buddies like what the fuck are you doing I'm like just organizing the cards man he's like go the fuck to bed and I'm like I don't think I can isn't it too bad that the cops can't arrest him for too many magic cards Anybody else I know you could do acid wrong until today Yeah, I should have been like walking around Vegas having fun, but yeah I can do that, but then we got back to the hotel room

I was still on acid nobody else was and I'm just like I don't know I got all this energy I just in the dark and a fucking headlamp everyone's like to go to bed I'm like just the red cards go with the red cards the white cards go with white cards But whatever my killed in warlord needs a sound Keldon warlord wow that's a reference that was a reference Look I played magic when I was 15. I just stopped like a normal person. Yeah just stopped like a normal person. Yeah, well I don't say that. I should have done that. Sorry, Chad. Speaking of which, we're working on getting a Magic the Gathering, biggest problem tournament together. We gotta find an ending for that. How old is

Magic the Gathering? Ninety-five? Ninety-four? No, it is probably ninety-four. Actually, I think it's ninety-three. It's a little old for you then, isn't it? It's a little old for me. Was that how things set up for that show? Yes. Obviously. Should be playing one of these fresh new hip games the kids are into. You're more into Hearthstone. Every time I go to a Pokemon tournament though they go, get out of here! Taking all these pictures. Sorry sir, we have a list and your name's on it. Nick, do you think the Super Chats are going to be mean to you?

I hope so. We're not going to read them unless they're over $20. Yeah, if they're mean, you gotta pay. We're going to change what you said to be nice. Exactly. Unless you pay $20, then we'll read it as is. Yeah, that's good. I like this rule. It's like a modification of the $20 rule that I invented.

Well, Nick, this is your second time appearing on Biggest Problem in the Universe. When was the last time? It's been at least a year and a half, right? It's definitely been over a year. Yeah, nothing's, not a lot's been going on with you, I don't think. No, I'm just the exact same as before. How's your Killdozer going? Have you started working on some sort of government revenge device? Yeah, revenge device. The hardest part of the Killdozer is wallpapering the inside with the names and addresses of

government officials. Yeah. That makes it tough. I would think you were joking if you weren't staring at the camera. I don't know the terms of your deal. What jokes am I allowed to make? You already have cocaine. By the way, that's actual cocaine that Vito has on his nose.

I saw it off camera, him snorting a shitload of cocaine and then he put flour on to disguise it. I can verify this. I'm a drug recognition expert. It's half Cocaine and it's half the estrogen we fed Boblax to make him trans so we've corrupted a lot of people on this show. Boblax is trans now? He's non-binary. Oh, well that's nice. He made a plushie of himself. He did.

What do you think about this? What do you think about this? Oh, god, this is the gayest thing I've ever seen. But isn't this gay as the Bo-Blacks plushie? Look at the Bo-Blacks plushie behind you. That's right behind you. It's way better than the Bo-Blacks plushie. No, this is super killer, too.

That's Vito's girlfriend. This one? Yeah, that's Bo-Blacks. Stapled in there. That's Bo-Blacks. He's got a bra on. What do you think the guys in prison would think about this? This guy Vito the Vito plushie. What do you think? I don't know like I guess appetizing. Yeah It's nice. It's got a nice plush feel to it, you know, if you cut a hole in that you'd have a pretty good time

I think and these false. I don't want to fuck Chinese You'd have a pretty good time, I think. I think it's false advertising though. I don't wanna fuck Chinese. Of all the cursed items in here, you're literally in front of a Sonichu medallion, which many have blamed for the downfall of Nick Riketa here. Nick, are you worried about being so close to the medallion? Do you wanna smash it? No, like I don't care about it. It's a mistake. Oh, that's a mistake.

I lost mine forever. I found it the other day. Fox, what do you mean you found it again? It's an entertainment mistake It's not a real thing Vito Oh yeah, nothing happened since you got it The medallion didn't fuck up, I did Yeah because it's fucking dark sinister rape powers are

seeping their way into you You have to rape the spirit of an autistic I think he raped his mom I don't know what actually happened. Chris-chan? Yeah. Yeah, what are you talking about? He said he did. Null made him do it. Null made him do it. I mean that's... Do you think Null jerked off to the idea of him doing it? No, I don't think Null can jerk off. I think Null can see his penis at this point. He can only jerk off to Sota. Sota and calories or whatever Okay, I can't do enough vocal fry for a null impression

It's like I don't know if I think you can can I mainline some estrogen first? Are you cold? No, no Show leave me why? Guys are so like sensitive about your nipples. Mine are very large. Huh, really? You get them tattooed. No. I've never thought more about Nick Rekade's nipples than I did just now. That's a trick. Biggest problem in the universe.

Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe, the only show. Fuck, I forgot to get a rhyme to god damn ranks every problem in the universe from unfunny women Can't say that For milking your tits too, what do you mean unfunny women cuz I was talking about You know I saw male feminists and Bill bill burr I wasn't thinking I wasn't thinking Chrissy Mayer I really wasn't the show the biggest

really was it I really wasn't really wasn't the guest last week don't fucking say that I really wasn't I was cool about bill burr always about bill burr yeah funny no she's funny. The only stand-up show I was going to go to with her, she She's funny. She ran away from it. Chrissy ruined my entire life. Our audience of NSOs.

I would really be pissed at Chrissy. I am, I'm very mad at her. Well I heard that Chrissy introduced you to her. Your dad got killed? Yeah, sure. That guy's going to turn up in two years, still alive. Yeah. So is Chrissy the root of all your problems is what I was hearing? Yeah, it wasn't me at all. It's her fault.

Chrissy Mare introduced you to some people? She kept texting me, she's like, now do drugs on your livestream. She has that way about her. It is kind of like, well, you're not a stand-up comedian and you agreed to do a stand-up comedy show. Like, that is kind of a sin. You know? Like, I thought it was... It's like a modern sin.

The idea was that I was gonna do a bad job. Yeah. And then set up the stage for all the comedians. For all the... But then her dad gets killed, and so she's not there, and it's like, oh, now you're the headlining act, other than Lila Hart, but like, Lila's tiny, so she can't headline anything. Oh, yeah, that's right. That was right.

Didn't her dad get like murdered or something? Yeah, her dad got murdered the day, like two days before she was supposed to be on the comedy show. Well, that's a pretty downer fucking comedy show then. Our headliner's dead. Yeah, then Lila Hart. We got a lawyer to do some jokes here. Did you at least do lawyer jokes? No, I did a bunch of racist. Well, that's good

Just racist comments just racist commentary The thing about Chinese people is they got squinty eyes The Jews had it coming and I finally got to give it to them. I didn't mean I said unfunny women I didn't mean here. Okay. I was just looking at this sheet I just said what the paper said well I was looking at Bill Burr and I was like yeah Yeah, and then I kind of- well cuz he was on the view you're saying that was the- right, yes Okay, there we go. You know what I'm talking about. I know what you're talking about I just- don't fuck with don't fuck with me alright. I'm not fucking with you. You know what I was talking about

You know that I didn't mean Chrissy. I didn't come up with a rhyme. Let's see What happened last year? Let's see unfunny women and silver made me think of the view bad I know it's a bad look, but I don't I just had to clarify Okay sure I like Chrissy Mary, and she was great on the show. We had a lot of fun. Yeah No, you're talking about milk a lot though. We were talking a lot about milk. You were talking about milk a lot. You. I- Well, hold on. No. I came over and her and the other one are just talking about-

My wife? Yeah. Just talking about squeezing milk out of their tits and they're going through fucking- Peter's like, I squeezed chocolate milk out of my tits. I wish I could, honestly. They were taking out these little thermoses. Chrissy Mare was showing her breast milk off like it was in the fucking container. The rock. Yeah, the rock fucking container. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.

Losers shall always whine about doing their best when they suck my milk. Yeah, it was cool. It was pretty cool. She had like this like custom uncomfortable though I got a comfortable just talking about milk way too much I think it's kind of interesting when a lady okay as I said Like we're never gonna at some point our life starts secreting a different substance than what we've been secreting our entire lives Okay, I know about sweating. I know about peeing. I know about pooping. I know about crying

Okay, I know about sweating. I know about peeing. I know about pooping. I know about crying. This is so fucking awkward. Okay, but at no point. You know men can lactate. It's like if you woke up tomorrow and you started shitting strawberry jam. You'd be like, that's a new thing that my body, that has never come out of my body before. Shave everyone out of the studio. Will you stop lactating on the show? Whatever, and then your lady was so excited about the magic canister of milk

that I went on the gift registry and I got you on Thanks, it's your love could save me some What do you mean? She goes? Oh my god liquid veto put on the thing. Yes, I don't see it I don't want to see what veto said on them. So I bought you a hundred dollar like Titanium breast milk canister. It was one of the most expensive items on the registry. I don't want you to have bought me that though. I'm gonna send it back. No, I'm gonna send it back and buy another one. Now every time that she's milking herself, you gotta think about how Vito bought the device to squirt it into.

I already sent your one back and I bought another one. Doesn't matter, cause the idea came from me. It's a different one. And I put a gift note in there that said, save me son. I sent that back too. It's disgusting. Vito, can I sniff your mustache for no reason? Yeah, absolutely, get in here.

How you doing? I'm pretty good. Yeah? Yeah, it was rough for a while. I don't know, like the government decided to put a strap on on really go to town on me for a while. You're gonna start me with a good time. It's to town on me for a while. It's already made me a good time. But it's mostly over now.

I'll be sentenced next month. And my sentence is really simple. It's like, just don't drink or do drugs for a while. How long is a while? No, we get to argue about that. Cool. You get to argue about at what point? I could probably do some more drugs at this point.

Yeah, I could do some drugs now. Yeah. I can't. The drinking though, that's annoying. Like, why does drinking get lumped in with drugs? It's a dumb thing that, in my opinion dumb, that Minnesota does. If there's a substance crime at all, they demand abstinence from any mood altering substance that doesn't have a prescription. Right. But the funny thing is, I've got more prescription drugs. Can you still get nagged by your wife? Because that's mood altering for me.

You've got to be prescribed for that too. Okay. Bitch, you're going to jail. They do that. But I'm on more prescription meds now than I was on fun drugs before. I wouldn't be saying stuff like that. It's just true. It's so weird. Okay, but mood altering substances, they don't stop you from ingesting sugar. Sugar, caffeine. Yeah, you can have anything.

Nicotine is fine as well, which is weird because nicotine gets special treatment in all drug discussions because you cannot fucking stop people from smoking. You can't just kick it. Yeah, they'll kill themselves. But no, they do tell you, like, no liquor at all. It's like, well, but I didn't run over children with my car or anything while drinking. I just did that while I wasn't drinking. You should have.

You would also think, hey, like, drinking makes me not have to do drugs because at least I got something. You're going to take it all the fun away. I know Then you go hey, you know what make this liquor better. Why don't you put some more cocaine on you? Let me get a little bit more cocaine Okay, what are you talking about? So yeah, I would have done it like the whole box Critique my stupid Like you had this edgy comedian idea and you bitched out

I didn't bitch out like I would have done it all over my face dumped it out You could have you had the opportunity wasn't my idea though. It wasn't my idea He can't you're just a joke from someone who's less funny. I hate you guys. You just bitched out. That's all I Was literally smearing on my face, and I said does this look good? That's like candy ice stuff. OK. GCI CW Vito is excited to talk to a woman last episode. Deranged Ape says, what's your favorite part of Chrissy's stand up? My favorite part is when Chrissy says that she

moved from being a single lady comedian to a married comedian. So she's doing sandwiches now. She's making sandwiches and doing like, jack it off stuff. Cause it's negative towards women. We should have talked about how I didn't go to her stand up thing last time she was in town. That would have been a good discussion. Why is doing a jack off thing negative towards women?

Like, don't you want- Cause she's saying that women comedians are just doing like, jacking off their dicks in their face. Yeah, so? Well, that's, I mean, it's like my vagina. That's what she's saying. Stop! It's funny.

I don't know. What do you mean to say? It's funny. I haven't seen it. I thought you were saying it was not from the record. I don't think I've ever seen Chrissy Standup. She invited you personally. I know.

And I didn't go. Star Wars Girl was there. You could have made a lot of inroads. Wasn't there like plastic lawn chairs in somebody's house? It was a rape... It looked like a rape dungeon lawn chairs and somebody's house. It was a great It looked like a rape dungeon. Yeah, yeah, I almost went I've always told I said I was like she said it was like a VFW home like oh, I love a good VFW Oh, it's just like the back of somebody's fucking garage. They built a bar and VFRW home

I did start driving over there. I just by the time I got over there was over Rape veterans of foreign rape rape boys just by the time I got over there. Veterans of foreign rape? Veterans of foreign rape. Rape-wise, yeah. Okay, cool. Okay, Alexa Dame says, Vito, I used to work in Goodwill for four years in SoCal.

Wow, that's specific. We never wash the clothes. Goodwill does jot have washer machines. What the fuck? We tag them and put them on the sales floor straight from the donation we get from the people in the city. If it looks dirty, we toss in a bin to recycle. I suggest.

And then there's a comma. There's a space and a comma. And there's no space after the comma. Lowercase i, suggest to everyone to wash the clothes you buy from Goodwill. Well, I didn't get it from Goodwill, so we're good. Did I see that right? Like, you got shoes from Goodwill or something wearing them barefoot?

No, I just, my shoes are disgusting and I don't wear socks. And I'm currently barefoot. Why don't you wear socks? I just don't like them. Why do you hang around these things? I don't like socks! I just don't like wearing them. How thin of a sock could we get you in? If I could get a thinner sock. Maybe that's the problem is I got too thick of socks. You gotta get like socks. I just don't like wearing them. How thin of a sock could we get you in? If I could get a thinner sock, maybe that's the problem is I got too thick of socks.

You gotta get business socks. You like wearing raw shoes? Yeah. Ash00, Vito wearing those. People wear Crocs! It's like the same thing. No, people don't wear Crocs. Children wear Crocs. No, they host those down though. These guys wear sandals all the time. I'll get sandals.

Yeah, Vito wearing those gross shoes barefoot might be the grossest thing about him for me Hremon says Chrissy is an inspiration to all up-and-coming comedians. She knows you don't have to even tell jokes to be one I Know I know I don't agree with that I'm just saying people always go. Hey, how come you guys never get guests on the show? I go well cuz every time we get a guess we get guests all the fucking time. I don't know the comments Who says that? Every show has a guest. The comments go oh

Fuck you this fucking sucks, and I like the show better when there's no guests Desert trolls. I know Onion desu Vito if you if you really cared about comfort you would weigh 150 pounds working on that Which way you well? Yeah, I want to go up first. You know so it's more fun to come back down like a rollercoaster Yeah, exactly you gotta get to the heights first I gotta say I watched a little bit of that lol cow fat camp thing And you're be better on that show well obviously you should have been wings wife I would have had a first of all I would do great on lol cow because I know how to corral those fucking idiots

They always get off topic and just end up talking about nothing, but it's just sucks It's terrible the best part of it is when one of them loses his mind tries to beat up his wife And I'm like well now we got to entertain you had a comment to like what what she like jumping in front of a tank No shit bitch. You got knocked over wow. I can't believe that happened Well, it is wild that Keemstar goes well We had to fire him and then the next day he goes by the way we've made an exclusive trading card of Wings you know fighting everybody and knocking his wife down. Do you see that? Do you see wings? No You know wings are hamstring? I don't watch any of that shit like it's not interesting. Well you might wings now, you know, I don't watch any of that shit like well, they're doing it

Well, you might see the clip, you know, I don't watch it either. But yeah, I've been busy. Sorry They're doing a they're doing a fat camp where they have yeah a bunch of fat guys I watched that I watched a little bit the clip of Jordy knocking his fat wife down and boogie trying to stop him or whatever else and I went, Boogie didn't do shit. Yeah, Boogie didn't do shit. Boogie didn't even move. Boogie didn't like shoot off into the air like just, stop now!

Bam, bam, bam! You didn't see Jordy knocking his wife over? Boogie should embrace that. Did it happen this week? Yeah! No, I had my, I took my kids to the water park this week. Oh, you gotta see this clip real quick. So basically they're doing a fat camp

and Wings of Redemption was arguing with Keemstar about the location they got because the internet's spotty or something. Oh, that's right I guess yeah, and then somehow It's just all bullshit. It's always gotta be a guy talking over it Got wings pushes his wife at fat camp Yeah, this is of course wings who was formerly on the PKA podcast. People are saying that he's a pedophile or something. Have you heard that? There's like something, I don't know.

I mean, like they say that about everybody at this point. Not me, people don't say that about me. Not everybody, Vito. No one says that about you ever. Shockingly, there's one person in this room that people say that about. Yeah. No one has ever said that about anyone other than me.

I got it. Hold on, move it over Yeah, there you go. All right Get the audio get the audio click the little audio thing Sweaty is already that's kind of boogie says that's your wife. Yeah, that's the first person I would want to throw in the ground. I was gonna say, my favorite part of this clip was there's one bitch who comes in at the end and she just keeps going, that's your wife! That's your wife, dude! That's your wife! And I just left a comment, I'm like, was that his wife? I wasn't sure. I needed some bitch to scream it 12 times. Who's the planet that's bigger than wings in the blue?

Oh, that's Billy the Fridge! We like in the blue Man he put way But he's put the weight back on it makes me sad he's been in the hospital too he's got to watch it I don't have anything against him. He's just He's just so massive. I don't know. He had like a heart attack I thought. Well that's what I was saying is I watched this and I went, I went, look man I don't feel great about my weight but when I see Billy the Fridge, Wings of Redemption and Boogie I go, I'm doing alright.

I think that's the worst part that it makes people like you feel good about themselves. Fat cope? That's why all those shows, see you watch that fat doctor show. Doctor Now. Yeah, your enjoyment out of it. You could have lose 30 pounds yeah fucking hammer but you understand that like smaller fats like me we watch that as well and we go like well at least I'm not that fucking smaller fat

Vita I'm pulled towards you constantly the gravity I've noticed you've been leaning slowly towards my gravitational pull yeah we should measure fat guys and like how low their dick hangs on there like under Guns you can set that up. I'm sure You can measure all the back guys dick snick the weird like once the gun goes Oh, she can't drink you're gonna have a lot of free time, so maybe you can set up that fucking Need to measure fat men's penis It's part of you like... It's part of you like...

Yeah, I need to measure fat men's penises immediately. Nick's house of fat dick measuring. Come on in, I got all sorts of dials and rulers. It's part of you upset that you're not going to jail so you can just like relax and like not have any, you know, not have any strain. Not have kids yelling in your ear and then people screaming at you. It's a weird thing because... That's how I would feel.

Some people do have the option to go to jail rather than be on probation for like a long time. Yeah. Now you can do six months in jail. Oh, six months. Or you could do five years of probation or whatever. Six months is too much. Yeah, six months would be- Two months would be good.

Two months would be fun. That would be good. There would have been some level where it would have been something I would have considered, but they never offered it. It's like, no, we don't want to pay for you to be in jail. It's like, please, like, I need time. I need affection from men. I need affection from men.

415- Apparently Cosby had a real good time in prison. He was loving it. Bill Cosby? First of all, he's blind, so he can't see anything that's going on anywhere. So it could be a woman fucking- It could be a woman fucking- No one's fucking Bill Cosby up the ass, come on.

Are you kidding? You don't think the Aryan Nation has a price on Bill Cosby's asshole? I gotta be real, that's a good scalp to get. You think you're cool? I raped Bill Cosby, so think about that. He's gotta be like a celebrity rape brag board. Yeah. No, apparently he's just telling stories, playing checkers, all the inmates loved him. I think he's sad to be out for a four-and-five Nick you mean to tell me Vito made up for his shitty unrelatable problem last well last time Chrissy was on by bringing in another shitty unrelatable problem for her second appearance what was my shitty

unrelatable problem last week I don't remember no one else does either well fantastic awkwardlypoised says, Vito, nobody wants to hear you talk about the concept of work, hard or otherwise. If I want to hear someone ramble about something they don't even understand conceptually, I'll tell an LLM! What do you think about that? Nailed me. Nailed me to the wall. Atticus Finch said, I left a comment on YouTube saying I would love to fuck Chrissy and her giant milky tits.

And they deleted it. I can't believe that. And sent me a warning message. What's that about? Did you delete that? I have nothing to do with that. No, I can't send a YouTube warning message. Well, someone did. I'm sure a lot of people want to fuck Chrissy's milky tits. I get it. They were big.

They were swollen. In gorge. I mean, I had to go back, I had to go back to make the thumbnail for the show and the whole show, she's like, cause remember her tit was hurting cause it was backed up with milk or whatever. So the whole show she's doing this.

See, what he's talking about? I'm just saying, that's what, and I went, they are large. Okay. Frank's a lucky man Man is great having a wife with an engorged uncomfortable breast. It's awesome. Well, you know, it's better than having nothing at all. Yeah Anything's better than what I got Jar with a my little pony figurine in it every night. How much for that? Would you do that?

We'll talk. We'll talk numbers. Does the pony have to be engorged? Does the pony have to be? No, it's a little figurine. You're trying to fill the jar. Just one overfilled nipple. Wyatt says grill tips. To preface this, I work grill at a top 10 restaurant in my city. I work grill. Can I say I hate the way that guys who work in a restaurant talk about working in a restaurant?

Guys throwing out slang that they know you don't, that normal people don't use, is so fucking infuriating. I work grill. But like, that's like... I work the grava. You work the grill. No, I work grill. I work at a restaurant.

I work at a restaurant. I'm a chef at a restaurant. I cook the food. That's an ambiguous comment, though, right? Like, why work at a top 10 restaurant? I cook food at a restaurant. I work at a restaurant. I'm a chef at a restaurant. I cook the food. That's an ambiguous comment though, right? I cook food at a restaurant. Say that. If I say I work at a top 10 restaurant in my town, there's only like six restaurants.

So that's not impressive at all. I don't know where his town is. It could be any grill. A gay town. He's a top 10 come eating restaurant. I know guys who like that. James Beard awarded. Just a great place.

Vito's right on two zone grilling, but it's not needed. If you can feel out the hotspots on your grill and sear on the hotspots and then move to the cold spots after searing. Resting your meat for five to seven minutes is great. Rest longer for how thick your meat is. Always rest your meat. Oiling your grill is necessary for searing your meat veggies.

Would you put fat in your pan on the stove top so you should also rest on your grates? He's right. So garbage grilling was my unrelatable problem, and yet here a man who works groil came on in. Just oil a rag and wipe it over the grates with some tongs so it coats evenly. That sounds good. That's a good advice. That's like an SEO guy. No actually I can use that tip. If you're cooking steak try finding some shoulder petite tenderloin You have to probably go to the butcher for it. I'm not doing that. Shoulder petite tenderloin. Some of the best cuts of beef

Grilling in my... okay. I've gone to a fancy butcher shop, but I was too intimidated I was like I don't fucking know what to ask for. It was like a fat Italian off? Yeah, basically, yeah. Ding! Hey, oh, hey, oh, hey, oh, hey, oh, hey, oh, hey, oh! What do you want there, buddy? Hey, what are we getting ya?

I'm like, I don't know. Okay, do you have a... No! Voted up this week? No, because we have Nick Krakato, we have a guest, we have a lot to talk about. So we're just gonna get right into the problems, I think. My problem is crybaby businesses.

CBBs. CBBs. Can you believe the quartering's- Bankrupt? The quartering's coffee company is fucked up? Can you believe the quartering fucked up- He believed brilliant businessmen who offered to Elon Musk to work for him over that? The quartering was gonna be the CEO of Twitter

Someone who knows not a goddamn thing about running a billion dollar ad company. Elon I can do it. I can do it I'm really busy. Yeah, but I can take over Twitter for you. Just give me a shot. That was his real honest-to-god Shot. His pitch. Yeah, I don't know why it didn't go over And then he instead Elon Musk said no I'm gonna have Ian miles Chiang be my second command for some fucking reason And then the quartering said that he would give Eric July Anything you need anything including sexual things he didn't say I'll give you anything you near Eric except for sexual things He said anything you need which means if Eric needs to get jacked off anything you need, which means if Eric needs to get jacked off, quartering would do it.

Eric July is an interesting litmus test, where if somebody comes out and says, I support Eric July, I go, oh, you're fundamentally unintelligent. You know Eric July owes me money, right? How? Why? He said he would pay for my rehab.

Oh, that's true. I remember that. I remember him saying that! Are you gonna do it? Cause he prayed for you. I did rehab already, so he owes me money. I had to pay for it. How much?

It's like three grand. I think we gotta get that money. I think we gotta get that money. Would you take ISOM statues? Yeah, will you take back copies? I want stuff that's worth money. He meant three grand using the Eric Julli accounting system where each dollar dollars technically $12

I'm just saying he said a bunch of people made these public promises like I have Nick out this way And none of them that's before you got arrested. Yeah, no it was after I was after yeah I thought it was the stream. He's like look I just did and then I got prayers for Nick and like, you know Yeah, I'll pay for his rehab. I'm like, oh, cool. Like, let's do that. I like this idea. Yeah, I like free money. Rehab, you just basically go party and do drugs. Well, the most annoying part of all of this, I think,

was all the guys who were like waiting for you to have this big teary-eyed come to Jesus moment. They're like, when's Nick going to make the video where he goes, you guys, I'm really at the bottom of the barrel and I need a lot of help out here? You know? I owe you. I fell off the wagon and the evil Dick Masterson taught me how to party and I hate it. I just hate it.

I hate party. I hate party. That fucking dick did this to me. I hate party and you're having sex with women. It's the worst thing in the world. Please, make it stop. If I haven't done a line of cocaine off of you, you're not getting an apology. Yeah, so there was all, it was really annoying on Twitter.

I'd see all these cocksuckers being like, you know, I'm really hoping Nick wakes up to some of the people who are leading him down a path. It's like so fucking sanctimonious. The other funny thing is almost all these people knew I was doing a bunch of cocaine because I- They're all doing cocaine. Of course they fucking are.

I offered it to half of them. I'm like, oh, Of course, they fucking are. I offered it to half of them. I'm like, oh, we're going to be at the same show. You want some coke? Some of them would do it. Some of them wouldn't. Yeah, whatever. You can just fully talk about it now, right? Yeah.

Because it was my coke. There are YouTubers who are majestic. It was mine. That's what I told the court. Oh, you admitted that to the judge at this point. I told the court, no, no that was mine. It was my Coke for personal use. Right. Yeah.

And I would have done- Not for business use. You're not just covering for your kids at this point. Damn it, don't be funny. Nobody was- Can Eric pay for your Coke? It's actually my 12. Is that on the table?

That's more expensive probably. Space camp? It was mine. It was taking lessons from her expensive probably. Space camp. It was mine. It was taking lessons from her on how to do cocaine. It was really crazy. I'm just saying it's like, oh my god, like a fucking YouTube guy that does a little bit of fucking, I don't know man. There was a lot of like holier than thou bullshit.

Yeah, you're way worse than him. I'm way worse. Quartering got so pissed drunk that he literally was pissed drunk. He pissed in a fucking can on a stream. He's probably driven drunk. I bet. Absolutely. I would bet the quartering's driven drunk with how much he drinks.

The quartering pissed in a drain in his basement. Yeah. He walked over to the corner of his basement pissed in the drain. Which is awesome. I would do like anything in my business. No, why not? It's a hold of the sewer. I don't give a shit.

So anyway, the quartering made a... The quartering's coffee business. The quartering paid a bunch of hyper-progress progressive lesbians to make coffee for him. And then like him and all these guys, all these YouTube guys that know nothing about running businesses. They just try to sell shit to their stupid fans, right? And it's a lot of white label bullshit where it's all white label shit. I've talked to guys who are like, wow, it's really cool that Jeremy's making coffee.

I'm like, do you think he knows how to roast coffee? Do you think he bought a fucking coffee roaster? So he tried to do that. Cause he was paying. Well, I guess he did try to actually do it, which is actually more stupid than just doing what he should have done. Like what he was supposed to be doing

was having lesbians make coffee for him. And everybody said, this coffee's really good. Why do you know it anybody? Yeah, anyone. You didn't have to hire hyper progressive, penis, little men's, little boys penis shopping on plug beans. The point is, he was getting coffee beans from Who Gives a Shit, putting his dumb fuck coffee brand coffee under label on there.

What's up man, Rick and Morty coffee, that's what I want. A political coffee. And you know what? Coffee is all apolitical. Right. Even if you try to make it politicali- It's still just coffee. Because the coffee can't make you Republican or Democrat. No.

Like if you buy Black Rifle coffee, you don't just become like a whiny bitch. You- You have to be a whiny bitch who buy- Yeah, that's why you're buying the coffee. Alex Jones is not in the back of Infowars, you know, stuffing each alpha brain pill. What's wrong with that?

Here's the quartering's video. Why does he look like he has cancer? I love when he does these. His coffee gives you cancer. Did he lose definition in his face? He looks like a corpse. There is no one on the internet who is better at pretending to be poor than Jeremy. He is so good.

He's like, guys, I don't know if I'm going to make it. I lost $20,000. He's like, dude, you made $60,000 this week. Oh, yeah, dude He's making easily easy money I remember when he was like I just need a new thing to collect and I said hey you should collect a neo Geo games they're kind of expensive. Yeah, and they just went and he bought every single one probably like a $50,000 collection of neo Geo games just appeared behind him and then like a couple weeks later He's like, I don't actually want these does anyone want to buy my Neo Geo collection but at that point he was

already mad at me because the Eric July shit and I was like shit I could have got those Neo Geo games at a good fucking price. Speaking of YouTube. And I sent him an email from a dummy account where I said hey Jeremy I'm a longtime fan and I noticed you're selling your Neo Geo games you know if you're looking to get rid of those maybe I could work out a deal. You are so fucked. He didn't email me back. Because it reeks of veto. Dude I could have got like a fucking whole neogeo collection for 50% off like he was just dumping them. You just buy like a little raspberry pie and have all of the- Oh it's not the same. No it's not the same.

The big fucking cartridge. I know it's the same. It's not the same. Speaking of YouTube businesses, I am selling half-sized straws coming up very soon. I would buy that. Rikki Lop branded half-sized straws for when you have a small drink. I'm opening a candy company! Nick Rikadalaw's delicious sugar candy. Comes with a pixie stick straw and you know, you and the kids can have a good time. Powdered sugar, baking soda and flour. Cornstarch edition.

I do think that if they're going to stick you with the fucking suns, you at least got to make some novelty gifts for the fans. Yeah. And a little something big. Uh... What's he gonna tell me about... I think they're gonna do like a... Riketa Law mystery box that had like a bunch of great stuff.

In it, like a... Okay. Like little baggies of different... You need more merch... Do you even have t-shirts or anything? My merch game is really weak. You didn't bring... You gotta have a t-shirt.

I want a Nick Riketa t-shirt. What do you wanted to say? Like, what do you wanted to be? I wanted to... I fucked this guy's wife and all I got was this stupid t-shirt. I want a nacrecated t-shirt. What do you want it to say? Like, what do you want it to be? I want it to be that I fucked this guy's wife and all I got was this stupid t-shirt. Oh, god damn it! What? Water went for the tub!

Theodore, my wife is over 12. No one believes it. I fucked this guy's wife and all I got was a t-shirt! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH No, let's see if we can find him. It's like, it's crybaby businesses. It's like, your business sucks, so you're going to cry about your big targeting. Instead of making your business better, you're going to cry about how everyone should give you money to keep your shitty business afloat. Yeah. He looks like Bud from Day of the Dead.

It's like, there's no way your coffee's good, bro. There's just no way. Like, you don't care about coffee. You care about liberals. Well, did you read what he said? He said he apparently, and somebody found like his like, did he file bankruptcy or something? They had like financial documents or something. He filed gayrupcy.

Well, apparently he spent eight thousand dollars on a K-cup machine to make his own custom cake cups. K-cups is just trash. Yeah, why are you making fucking K-cups? Just put the white bag fucking labeled coffee on the website and forget about it. I made coffee like I sold coffee. Yeah, I was with a roaster out in Yours was a good idea because it was fun. It was good. Yeah, it was it was funny It was get a bag of dicks is a very good bag of dicks, but it was like yeah This is it's just not making enough money. So yeah forget it right, but his like meme coffee He's been doing this forever. I don't yeah

But I didn't know every business that he has fails up to $300,000, then he needs money. He like launched his coffee on my channel, you know that, right? Did he? He said I'm doing this fucking, were you like, did you ever pretend to be excited for his white label fucking bullshit coffee? Look, I'm excited when anybody makes something and they want to sell it. He's not though, he's selling another person's thing with his name on it. That's even better. That man's making something.

That man's making something. Penises off the little boys. Oh, this is gross. Do they put it in the coffee? Yeah. Ew. They put that ID in the coffee. Israeli Roasters. On my channel we sold like 20 grand worth of coffee that day, it was awesome. He should be paying for your rehab. And then he had to shave, his wife came and shaved his face. Oh wait, what? Like because he sold, we said- That was the challenge challenge he would shave if he yeah His wife came and shaved off his fucking beard My challenge is my wife will shoot me in the side of my head if we sell a bag of coffee

One bag of coffee that stupid like radio shit. We're gonna shave my beard everyone We're gonna shave my beard everyone. We're gonna shave my beard everyone We're gonna shave my fucking beard if I sell two bags of coffee It's like so fucking dumb It is a bit drive time radio It's like a sin man, there's like a tenth level of hell He's like the only guy who actually does look better with a beard down to his nipples. Yeah, he looks terrible here. Let's hear it I wasn't sure what you're saying

So it says woke leftist. He looks like he got into my stash. All these guys are so worried about their employees. You notice that? Eric Jelani, the quartering. Well because their audience is obsessed with business and money. The idea that it's just coming their way at some point. I'm gonna go public about this, but it appears I have to now. business. Business. Business. Business. Business.

Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business.

Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business.

Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. Business. fund the new studio. Obviously it's a meme, but you all know I have my coffee company. Well, the coffee company has also been expanding to- To what? So that's not a meme. To try and compete-

Expanding to Amazon, anyone can- Why are you- Amazon takes like 40% of your sales. What are you talking about? Yeah, there's no reason to expand to Amazon. This guy has two million subscribers almost. Like you have a big enough base that Amazon's not helping you.

No. I mean, well, I think that's why he bought this fucking $80,000 K-Cup machine, was he thought he's going to put boxes of K-Cups on Amazon or whatever. Bro, the people you're competing with are serious coffee makers. Yeah. It's not jackasses in building a new studio and crying about little girls with back hair. OK, and also, what is your passion for coffee?

Like, what do you know about coffee? Do you know what coffee tastes good more than other coffees? Have you traveled the world tasting different coffees? Or is it literally just, would you suck dick for coffee? Well, what was it? I don't think so. I fucking hate coffee. What was this a response to Black Rifle coffee being woke and then everybody started making coffee because they're like we're gonna be the true anti woke coffee. Yeah. I liked his hot chocolate. Hopefully by the end of the year. Who's hot chocolate? Jeremy's hot chocolate.

Well how do you fuck up hot chocolate? It's chocolate with water. I know I just was delivered to my he sent it like a care package with hot chocolate Lesbians made it he didn't make any of this shit. I don't care who makes it I know you don't care who makes it and that's why this whole business is flawed Cuz when I make hot chocolate, I don't go I hope my favorite anti woke youtuber made this hot chocolate I just go whatever it comes in a packet. You put it in a mug and you're done Yeah, I assume Swiss miss is staffed by lesbians too. I'm not worried about it they're making good coffee. At least Swiss Miss I can jerk off when I make the hot chocolate

this I gotta look at this fucking guy. Why do you jerk off with Swiss Miss? Well you seen the Swiss Miss she's a good-looking gal. There's no woman on the package of Swiss Miss. Well you're getting the wrong Swiss Miss. There used to be. There used to be a Swiss Miss girl. Find her, I wanna see this. You know what? Hot chocolate got woke we can't see wrong Swiss Miss. There used to be. There used to be a Swiss Miss girl. I don't see this. You know what? Hot chocolate got woke. We can't see the Swiss Miss girl anymore. Yeah. This is what Vito is checking out. Wait no! I was thinking of something else!

What was I thinking of? Not this! Not this! Not this! This is her audition to be in Cuties Vito. No no no no no no no no. I fucked up horribly. Uh, there it is. No! That's not what I meant! Which one? Which one? There's a different one. Waifu. Which one is it?

What am I thinking of that has the fucking... Little girl? No! There's like a lady! Land O' Lakes? Like the butter? Well the Land O' Lakes is close. I know you're thinking of butter. The Land O'akes one is good There's a fucking lady with the and Jemima Dutch shit the Dutch outfit a Dutch outfit not this There's what there's a there's a different Swiss. It's not a little girl. I know that's a little girl

So you're talking about I've gotten my wires crossed There a Swiss miss that had like a hot blonde chick on it? Are you trying to meet this girl at a local grocery store? This is one of the classic blunders I gotta say. I've really goofed. This guy? Yeah, it's that guy. That's who I was jerking off to on the Swiss Miss.

Anyway. You know what? I was thinking of Uncle Ben. It was Uncle Ben. That's who I was jerking off to. And Aunt Jem mama did have those sweater puppies quartering stand dollars because he thought he would make a

Anti-woke how is he not making money in coffee like cuz he fucked up Fuck up non-stop you have a company that's doing all the work And it's just yeah, they just fulfill orders drop shipping right like you can't lose money You just may not make as much as you want yeah And your advertising is built into your show that you're already doing it's completely free to him What the hell is this shit? Well? This is how he's gonna save his company So this is what's linked in the description is the MAGA mix olity G cookbook Which shows the quartering and Donald Trump sipping on stupid drinks.

Have you met Trump, Nick? No, I went to his house, but he wasn't out. I was at Mar-a-Lago, yeah. Nice. Did you do any blow there? They're rolling up the documents. So there is a clip of me coming out of a stall in the bathroom because Viva was there, and I definitely did cocaine

Believe it Can you believe that the limited edition number? Jeremy can you believe this big design coffee of quartering? I had to tell you guys this if you get a book that's spiral bound that guy has given you the cheapest fucking book You can ever wait a minute For coffee bartender like where did this come? No, this is yeah Look here tailgate for Trump cookbook. We can special or this is how he's gonna say. Are you serious? What the fuck is this shit? Wait, what does that say the ultimate what's the log line? ultimate patriot power pack drinks dishesinks, dishes, keeps scrolling down. Well one part, okay the ultimate... Defiance. Holy fuck dude. A one-two punch of American grit, flavor, and unfiltered freedom.

It's not just a bundle. It's a full-on celebration of sovereignty, community, and the MAGA spirit. Pairing the boldest drink book in town with the tailgates for Trump cookbook for a combo that's as defiant as it is delicious. Heritage meets hustle, served with a side of sass and a whole lot of class who wrote this She'll any Mac T. I would assume Melanie Mack write this the MAGA mixality drink book teaches you how to Let's see all ages refreshers that especially raise his son in a world full of this from kicking the pants Well, don't you want to serve your school them and protect them from the world? No, you can't though. But dig, you can serve your kid all ages refreshers that flipped the script

on the plot project 2025 hoax with a smirk. What? All ages refreshers that something project 2025. I have no fucking idea. Just put the N word on it. Like that's why Kanye is so refreshing. All right, hold on. This is some good MAGA comedy. The Trump Tower Zinger Burger. Have you been to Kanye's factory? No. He's got here with the swastika on it? Here in LA?

Yeah. That's a new thing. He set up a factory? A factory. Yeah. Who's he manufacturing there? I wanna go to the swastika factory. I don't know.

God, I can do that at home. I wanna inspect the smokestacks on that building. RFK'sastika factory. I don't know. God, I can do that at home. I wanna inspect the smoke stacks on that building. RFK's nuclear chili. Hey, don't! Hey, don't! Hey, don't! Hey, don't! Hey, don't!

Pete Buttgig's booty jiggling XL hot dogs and buns. What the hell? Because he's gay, I get it. And the Clinton. Oh, it's an ass sex joke. It's an ass sex joke. And the Clinton cooler. With your coffee?

Can I get some more butt sex with my coffee please? So this is one way the quartering is trying to save his business, the other is guys you gotta get Coffee, brand coffee. Pre-order the Founders Vault Pack. But this doesn't make any sense, why is he making literally gay coffee? Tangerine coffee. Tangerine coffee, cherry coffee with freeze dried strawberries. They're just covering up how bad it tastes.

I thought the whole thing with coffee, brand coffee was like, it's just coffee man freeze-dried strawberries. They're just covering up how bad it tastes. I thought the whole thing with coffee, coffee was like, it's just coffee, man. It's just coffee. Tangerines. It was any political coffee, now it's specifically political coffee. Now it's specifically gay fruit coffee. I don't understand this at all.

I do want a surprise gift of cum. Please send to Vito's booty the Founder's Peg, because I want the Founder's coin, and I want to find out what Jeremy's surprise gift is. I can help him It's a picture of him. It's a picture of him jacking off into the bag Crybaby business, it's just like dude like no one needs your fucking coffee You like just let it die just come up with a better you clearly ever. Yeah, you said I messed up

I'm doing a million different things because I don't take any of them seriously, so I don't know by my fucking cookbook You're not good at you're not good at coffee, right? That's it when I'm tailgating and thinking of like grilling stuff. The last thing I want is bad political humor Yeah, I don't want to think about that. Yeah. Yeah I also don't need a MAGA cookbook to tell me how to cook a fucking hot dog. Like what is this? Oh get it cuz shove it up your ass. Yeah, shove it up your ass Actually, it would be funny if it just hit shove it up your ass. I'd be like alright well that's kind of funny I heard you only eat Vienna sausages though

I like the little guys They're taking donations to save your company like you're a glow- you're not like a local business I don't like when local businesses do it, but at least you know they live here I feel like the local businesses will just post one crybaby Facebook post goes you know after 20 years of Serving community I guess it's time to shutter our doors. Yeah, I feel bad We'll just post one crybaby Facebook post goes you know after 20 years of serving community I guess it's time to shutter our doors. Yeah, I feel bad Local businesses go down cuz I like them I don't want some kitchen United shit or like a franchise to move in yeah, whatever

But a youtubers side venture going down It's like well you failed at that cuz that's not your thing cuz you do like we used to like board game reviews like that's Now he does shitty political commentary, but it's like that's what you do like another magic to gathering game That's what you should do. He's banned from magic forever Call it Melanie Mac the gathering old bitch the old maid call it old maid old dumb bitch Call it the old dumb bitch game every card comes with a shitty out of context Bible verse Yeah, my old bitch says the F slur. How's Melanie Mac doing with the Jesus? The old dumb bitch game. Every card comes with a shitty out of context Bible verse. Yeah.

My old bitch says the F slur. How's Melody Mac doing with the Jesus? She doesn't seem to understand that Bible. She told me she was praying for me. That was nice. When? Like right away when I got arrested. She's like, oh, I'm praying for you.

Does she say, I'm praying for you, faggot? No. What, I thought we could say it now She didn't know I was gay I don't know alright nevermind I'm allowed to say it I'm praying for her old dumb bitch ass old old fucking bitch A lot of people told me they were praying for me and my family

and like I believed it and like but when you're a grifter who uses Christianity to try and sell your YouTube shit I don't believe you. I just inherently, like just don't. I don't, I don't. I mean, does it bring anybody closer to the Lord? Has anybody watched Melanie Magneau? Has anyone ever gotten closer to the Lord, really? Well, I'm just saying, if you're trying to find the path to God, I don't think it's through that fucking bitch.

You know what I'm getting? I get people wanting to find something beyond themselves, but I don't see how like an aging harlot going, You know, the thing about all the fucking gays is, there's no fucking gay! And you're like, I know, I know, I know. I know. Like, is that what you want? I mean, you know what, honestly, maybe she would be a good preacher. Maybe that is what people want now. Nobody wants a woman preacher.

Remember that woman preacher who tried to lecture Trump, and you like shut the fuck that was so you saw that I saw that That's great. I really wish you had just gotten up and just wouldn't been like nope out You see you should have a man do looking at Trump like I'm down. Whatever you're doing, I'm down. You wanna tackle that bitch? I'll tackle that bitch. You wanna tackle that bitch? JD Vance is ready to wingman at any moment. Like he did it with Zelinski. He's like, you want me to get in here? You want me to get in here?

I know you can't get your hands dirty. You want me to get in there? I will give JD Vance that. He's got good instincts for wingman. Did you meet him? JD Vance? Yeah. Mar-a-Lago. You went to Mar-a-Lago. No, I met Roger Stone. Was Tim Poole there. No, I met Roger Stone Was Tim Poole there? No, this is Dan Bongino and

That's how you say that I was about to say Don Bongo all the time like I was Dan boing gingo Who's the guy who did that Hillary Clinton documentary the India dude? Yeah, so it's like Dan Bong about. Dinesh D'Souza. So it was like, Dan Bongino and Dinesh D'Souza combined, they made this documentary about how MAGA people were getting targeted by law enforcement. Like moms were getting arrested in their homes. Well, there were a bunch of Jews there. They could target themselves. Go on, go on.

Like speaking of, Lex Friedman was there, for example. Oh, yeah. Oh, we love that guy. Oh, man. Mr. Massad himself. MIT, basketball. They made him. You remember that Smurf and Gargamel made that little Smurf

to infiltrate? That's what Lex Friedman is. Look at a Smurf in there. Smurfette was a Gargamel. Are you talking about Smurfette? Lex Friedman is smurfette Smurfette ruined the entire smurf culture Well yeah cause then all the smurfs wanted

Once the smurf found out they could fuck they're like Fuck her with their tails They fuck her with their tails But no I mostly hung out with Lady Raggits was with me and I hung out with her and then I hung out with like Robert Barnes and Viva Fry All the lawyer guys?

Yeah, the people I know. Still friendly with the lawyer guys, some of them? Very few. Some of them, a lot of them, I see a lot of them crying going, you know, Nick never gave me any money for being on those streams. Oh my fucking, that's fucked.

You got free promotion to like tens of thousands of people. Hundreds of thousands of people. Hundreds of thousands of people, fucking figure it out. No, that's actually, that's like the wrong way of looking at it. It's just, fuck you. You didn't put this together. You're not me. Fuck you. Here's the crazy thing.

Almost all of them... Did get money from me. I went on their shows and I super chatted them hundreds of dollars like saying thank you for joining. Like I didn't have to. They want reparations. That guy Nate the lawyer is like always crying about reparations. So weird, cause I'm like, I never promised any of you money. I specifically told you I wouldn't give you money.

And I will never ask you for money to go on your show because that's not how this is done. This is a different business and the exposure and the networking is the money. And being on any one of those shows, like I went through my ad rates and with the live shows that they were on had a hundred thousand people on them yeah and like you were on this show for eight hours that would have cost you fifty to seventy thousand dollars and at these lawyer terms you know these shoes well no the amount of airtime they were getting got fuck I should have tried to get on those streams my god you only go on streams where people hate you I I know! For some fucking reason. Hey everybody, you all hate me right?

There are no streams that like me! I love fucking kids! I talk about I went on Ralph, I went on Ralph. You always do. He invited me on to talk about Andy Worshki and somehow the topic became me. Whatever, we had fun. I told him I'm like, look guys, I plan on giving you thank you gifts for coming on my show.

And so I would go on their streams and I'd super chat them like a dildo and a big dildo. But I super chatted a lot of these channels tons of times, not just like right after the show. I would do it for years because like you go on and I want to encourage super chatting all the time. So I would go in and drop a 20 or $50 super chat on any show I'm watching a chat of cuz then I want to they're worth 20 bucks It's like a whore like you throw 20 bucks out and I get way more than that. Yeah Because there's like well, thanks for like 10s of thousands of subscribers after appearing on your fucking thing

They had six figure careers because they came on my show. They're like this fucking They came on my show like this fucking it's insane It was and like they were nice sounding bored But I could have done that with any any lawyer who happened to be there I just invited people that I knew or people that were you know mostly entertaining I guess and yeah, if you're at it look if you're good at the job You can make the money yourself and they all see you're they've all had the opportunity since then to build their own channels some of them built up their channels Some of them didn't do so well and the reason is they're just not that entertaining they can be very smart Well, that's the big they're all better lawyers than me

That's great But like they they're not very good at holding on to audiences because they get wrapped up in legal autism instead of translating law to normal People and they're like I want to talk about this stop just tell us what's going on to audiences because they get wrapped up in legal autism instead of translating law to normal people. And they're like, I want to talk about this. Stop. Just tell us what's going on. Then they go, why is Nick drinking and having fun? And you go, why do you think everyone's watching the motherfucker?

He's not going, well, here's the thing about this legal brief. It's very interesting online for it. It's like, it's a show. It's a fucking drama. Okay. What's your problem? My problem? Yeah, your problem.

I don't know yet. Go to Vito first. You don't know yet. You're supposed to Yeah, your problem. I don't know yet. Go to Vito first. You don't know yet? You're supposed to be in the middle. I don't know yet. My problem is unprepared guests. No, no, no. I'll go. He wants to... He's got time to figure it out. Alright, here's my problem, Dick.

Is, uh... What brought this on? I've been having a... I've been taking sleeping pills lately. Amazing. Just hoping... That's the problem with your life. You need to put more things in your mouth Oh, I just it helps. I need help sleeping. You know I don't sleep good

So fucking exercise I do exercise dude. It doesn't change it Okay, I can't okay exercise always makes you see I exercise and it has not been helping Don't carry a big rock from one place to another ten feet move it ten times Okay, you'll fucking pat you'll go like I can't believe I'm so dark You know my problem is that you tell you try to tell a story and it's gonna turn into a whole unrelated fucking thing It's just like so fuck it. It's crazy. It's crazy that I'm taking sleeping pills lots of people take sleeping pills Yeah, it's crazy that you're trying to add sleeping pills to your life something that's easily fixable with a little bit of work I a little bit of effort. I am putting it

Anyway, don't you think so wouldn't you agree? I've never taken a sleeping pill in my life. That's the only thing you haven't taken It's just a nice little thing to help me sleep. It's not a big deal anyway For some reason these sleeping pills. I am I dream, you know, you have crazy dreams. No they don't. What are you talking about? The ones I take, I'm having crazy dreams because of the sleeping pills. A lot of them are really bad horror dreams where I'm not actually scared, where I'm like there's like a cockroach but he's like got the brain of a man and he's plotting against

me. But I'm like, but it's just like a little cockroach. Your sleeping pill is labeled ketamine? If Tom knows, it sounds awesome. It's kind of like I'm being stalked by like plankton from like Spongebob where you're like ah he's just a dismissable threat. Did you buy all those Spongebob? I did buy all those Spongebob magic carrots. They sold out. They weren't a hundred bucks you looked at the wrong thing. It's too close. I can sell you one if you want one stop right there. I'm gonna stop you right there I don't hear the rest of this. That's the pitch all right

But I've started having that thing where like you have an idea in a dream Oh, no, and then you wake up, and you go this is the best idea I've ever had finish you write it down Yeah, we're not doing that. That's a terrible idea. Yeah. And then, so my problem is dream ideas, Dick. The worst thing is that I have a Google doc full of my dream ideas that I found recently.

Rape kids. Those ones I deleted. Those are my, that's my dream journal. That's, let's see. Are you fucking serious? You have an idea, you pitch ideas while you're sleeping So I do sometimes get good ideas from dreams. Sometimes I get good ideas Sometimes you know like every sitcom has done this bit in the dream idea that you come up with is always fucking retarded

Yeah, that's the whole point is that your dreams aren't reality and they don't they don't match You know because I'm a great writer I'm always coming up with great ideas for stories. So tell me if any of these pitches work for you. Okay, here we go. Okay, so a guy gets visited by his future self. He's able to travel back in time to take over the body of a guy who's supposed to be dead. I guess that's himself, and then so is the older guy gives him a file and then steps in front of a bus and gets killed and his younger self

has to prepare for an alien invasion. So the guy goes back in time. I can't really make sense of this. Take over the body of someone who's dead but that someone who's dead is himself how the fuck did he get to the future to go back in time you know what I really can't follow it made a lot more sense all right hold on this way this one's this one's better this one's better okay there's a tiny lady who you ask her for help and she says I can't help but she leaves two screws out two tiny screws and their screws

They're the kind of screws I literally wrote this down there at screws for fixing dental hydraulic chairs Of course, right and the indication of her leaving the screws on the table is that she's subtly asking for a bribe and Then so the book goes, is explaining that... Is this Coach Redpill's book? Do you have that book? Mohon Drive? I think I have to have it somewhere. I don't know where...

You have to have it somewhere. I don't know where I would have deleted it. I just haven't... You have to send it to me. Might be on an old hard drive or flash drive. It's somewhere in my house. I just, I'll find it. Maybe the cops have it.

No, they didn't take any of that shit. How about this? Bugs Bunny is really worried about making money but someone tells him he could still make Space Jam 3. Now that's pretty good. That could actually happen. With whom? I don't know. Angela Reese, that ugly bitch. Okay here's one you might identify with Nick is that you're at a party that's serving cannabis infused brisket which then gets raided by the cops about brisket cannabis infused brisket that's a fantasy some of these are a little bit bad here's a good one that I don't even know if this was I don't know if this was dream idea main characters name is John dishwasher Well, it's like you know how like some people you know it's like Mike Baker like

It's like oh shit, I'm getting raided by the cops? God damn it. I think I might just like a real like, yeah, really fucked you over. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. That was the worst part of all of it really. Was Eric paying for? Yeah, it was the Eric July thing. That was the worst part about getting arrested and having my life destroyed. Honestly, if I were you, that would be the worst part.

So I'm crushing. This fucking dumb fuck black guy. No, I'm gonna play for my getting lectured by Sanctimonious cocksucker shit that can't ride his way out of a wet paper bag couldn't ride his way over the news Yeah, go ahead John dishwasher. I think is a good I might I might use that is he a soup is he a busy wash this well It's like the idea that you know how people are named after their profession in the times. You'd have like Tom Baker or Mike Potter. This guy's father was a dishwasher so he's John Dishwasher.

I like that you explain the whole thing. It works! Yeah. Okay, here's the worst deal. But like what happens, yeah? Like, you know, he's like an average guy who finds out he's on an adventure. And he has to discover a mystery on a far off planet. I don't fucking know. What the't fucking know what do you mean?

It's a name that's all it is Characters there's all you need is good name like Zaylin, you know You wrote this shit down. I wrote this down. That's stupid. Okay. Well, here's here's some that you did Here's the worst dream idea I ever had because I woke up and I was in such a manic state This was like 10 years ago I was in such a manic state that I said no that is a good idea and I am gonna do that So dick I sent you an email. Did you get my email like an hour ago? Yeah, I didn't look at it though All right. Well, let's let's bring it up

So this was around the time 10 years ago when people were talking about sexual consent, right? The idea that you have to explicitly consent. It's condoms for kids. Is that the idea? It's not condoms for kids. It's not the idea. That's not it at all. Ask condoms for your little boys.

It's not correct. Okay? Yeah. So people were, colleges were starting to say to kids, like, hey, you really gotta get consent before a sexual encounter, otherwise you might get sued. Okay? Okay.

So I said, well, what if there was a consent form that people could sign before they had sex, right? Which I think they have. Haven't they had that at some colleges or something? Yeah. People have set that up. Really funny. So I said, but what if that consent form came packaged

in a tiny condom wrapper with a condom along with it? Yeah. So it would be a two pack. That's stupid. The white condom would be a form for each college kid to go Yes, I can send to the sexual encounter and the black baggage would be a condom to have sex with Wait what? And I spent a month Coming up with like trying to like get website URL. You're like a Howard fat Howard Hughes

I was on something. I was uh. I was not in my right mind. You had a fucking chemical imbalance. What are you fucking talking about? The consentdom is like, because it's the consentdom. It's a tiny, unfoldable form contained inside a condom wrapper that you keep in your wallet. Why did you make this? So if you're going to have sex with a lady,

you can then later prove that consent was obtained legally by having her sign the form. Why did you make this though? Cause I'm cry- cause I had a dream! You made this? I had a dream! Do you want to see the form? I sent you the form too. This looks like a product made by someone who's never had sex with a woman at all. Well, in my mind I was like, listen, this is the stupidest idea ever, but these liberal douchebags would love this.

Cause at the time, this is all they were talking about. No, well cause I was like, I need a pink haired lady to sell this. Cause if I show up and sell it, everyone's going to know it's a grift and a lie. But I was like, this is like, I could get colleges to be like, yeah, well, you gotta, you gotta get your consent-dom.

You gotta bring your consent-dom before you have sex. You need a condom and a consent-dom. Vito, no one likes opening one condom package. Opening two is way worse. This is like the most amazing thing you've ever done. The worst part was emailing my lawyer uncle, being like, hey, do I need to trademark this terrible idea? And him being like, nah, man, I think you're good. I don't think you got to worry about that.

Do you know when no one else is going to try this? Because in my head, I'm like, somebody else is going think you're good. I don't think you gotta worry about that. Do you mean no one else is gonna try this? Cause in my head I'm like, somebody else is gonna steal this idea. So brilliant. This was, all right, here was the form I mocked up. Oh my God. Let's see, I might've, I don't know if I borrowed this. You would open the consent them.

So it's a nine-fold, like a nine-square-fold. Yeah, it's like a nine-square-fold thing. So you would open the consent them, and it would say, by signing this form, we declare we are freely about to engage in sexual activity and then both person engaging in the sexual activity Would uh, you know sign either side of it. You're a lawyer Nick Which is why I want to bring this in. You wrote all this stuff? I don't remember if I stole this or I wrote it. I think I wrote it. What's worse?

I don't know I think I even put the lines on where it would be folded up to demonstrate. You know this is like, the consent form for sex is unenforceable, right? Okay, but my idea was that colleges have a bunch of money and they're retarded. So if I went to them and I said, you have to hand these out to every kid to protect yourself legally or whatever. But it seems like the way you have it with the way you graphically designed it, it looks like the consent dom. Yeah I know. Like you're gonna dominate college kids.

You need way more bullet points on this form. Well the name was terrible, the consentum, it doesn't even work at all. I should have just called it the condom, but con was short for consent. You shouldn't have done any of this. No, it was terrible. And look, it says this form is not a legal document So why would you put that I didn't know what cuz you should have put it is a legal document learn more about your right to a Consensual document Website where they could go learn about yeah, learn about consent You know I don't think I ever made a website gotta You gotta push them a little bit. I don't think it got that far You gotta kind of push. Look in my head. They want you to push too. In my head I was gonna find some social justice lady who was really into the idea

I was gonna be like listen. I'm just gonna be a silent partner on this you're gonna be the face of this thing Like a rape victim who goes if only I had AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH goes, you know, I was brutally raped by all these lacrosse. Somebody get a perfect rape victim. I know how to help you heal. Go sell these condoms to men. Well, you know, I was going to be like, you know, if only she had that form, she wouldn't have been brutally

raped by all those lacrosse players, because she would have communicated consent before. You made this when? Like 10 years ago. This is so funny Yeah, I know it was like retarded. I'm so glad I didn't lose this in my hard drive I'm like, oh great. No, this should be in the Smithsonian what you need is the quartering to have condom brand condoms Yeah condom brand condoms. Everybody can enjoy a safe fun and consensual encounter terrible font I chose these are some bad fonts. I'm gonna say

No, they look great. They look great. See it's happening. I even look I even made a little tour tear open condom to demonstrate So you tear open one condom and the contract comes out? Yes, and then you tear up it's the favorite part of time in with the contract open the condom is kind of fun So there's a fun element of like hold on hold on and the girl fun so there's a fun element of like hold on hold on and the girl goes so sorry for any woman who's ever encountered sexy figures no ripping up with the condoms great that's the best part it is fun it's got a fun wrap you don't like opening a condom no what is wrong with you it's in that little tiny like it's like a trading card wrapper some of them not mine. Some of them aren't tiny. You know what it is?

Honestly, it should be like trading cards. You should open the condom and occasionally... Oh, I got a Charizard! That's a gold one. If you got a gold one randomly, you'd be like, well, this encounter is going to be great. Yeah, for me. Vito, if we turn this sideways, is it also two inches deep?

It is two inches deep. Why'd you write two inches on it and six inches? Because that's how big the package would be. Well, why'd you write it on it? What's the six inches thing? Because I was fucking out of my mind crazy. I was in a manic state I was on- I don't know. Who did I say today? Vito's like I've never met somebody who's more embodies mania than Vito. I definitely embody mania. I agree with that statement wholeheartedly. Look, I had a dream. The dream was a bad dream. And uh...

It's like the anti-Martin Luther King. I had a dream last night that we added two condom packages. And you'd open one and sign it. Something's wrong with my head. Look. This is one of... You know how Vito has ideas? Well, they're not all winners, unfortunately. So I have actually reviewed a consent contract that's legitimate. Yeah, they have like actual ones now.

Yeah, so pornography companies. That makes sense. And so, okay, so they could use this on a certain porno. No, this would not work at all. Why not? It's not a legal document. It's in a, well, we would erase that if we made it. I had to put not a legal document because I wrote it, you know, if we got a lawyer to

write it, it could be a legal document. You just went so far into thinking about it that you wrote not a legal document because I wrote it, you know, if we got a lawyer to write it could be a legal document You just went so far into thinking about it that you wrote not a legal document. It's crazy I still every time I talk to my uncle I go I really hope he doesn't remember the time I called him up in a manic state and went hey, I got this idea. They're condoms, but they're not really condoms It's a little piece of paper. I think Riley had sex with a lady I think Riley hit you at a bad time. When you were like entering a manic state and that's why everything went bad. I think everything's been working out fine.

I'm taking the pills. I'm having all... What were you going to say? Dick, John Dishwasher is going to be a smash hit. The people are crying out for John Dishwasher. Just saying those consent forms have highly specific things like... Like what? He can spit in my mouth, for example. What are you talking about? Say it again.

The consent form for pornographic production. Okay. So what they'll do is they'll have like the acts that the actress is consenting to on film. Because you're not going to like ask for consent in the middle of like, can I spit in your anus? I understand that I will suck your dick in this scene right and they so like they have these giant sections of bullet points of all the crazy shit you can imagine and the chick will like just check yes or no. Oh okay and so no spitting in the face if she doesn't like check it off. Right it's really funny like when you read them you're like oh I haven't thought of that and'm horrible. So. Have you thought about being a porn lawyer?

That could be fun. That would be. No, actually, that industry is garbage. Because the like- I don't think there's any industry left at this point. There's a bunch of women in it. Yeah. And the Me Too shit is pervading the porn industry.

And like, some of it's legitimate. Like, some of these guys are weird and they do like rape the women off set. Like, that's all bad. That's bad. That happens in every industry. But just like everything else like if if you insert any politics into the like your personal stuff they'll come after you like they will shut down your payment processors and it's really easy to go

after people who produce porn because it's a vice and it's a sexual vice so. If only they had a tiny little piece of paper and a perfect little foil wrapper, you know? And you could sign it. I can't believe you made this shit. Well, I didn't actually make it. I just Photoshopped it. You could have got USAID money. It's not dumb.

That's what I was thinking in my head. I went, there's got to be a way to trick one of these colleges into being like, well, this is fantastic. You should have just been ripped torn with a bucket of them. We want to order, yeah, well I thought about, my plan was, again, to get a rape lady to set up a booth at a college with a bucket of these things. You're such a fucking scam artist.

Everything's gotta be a scam. As ladies are walking by, she'd go, hey, you don't want to get raped, you're gonna want one of these, and kind of like a homegrown thing. Unless you want to get raped, hey everyone, this lady wants to get raped you're gonna want one of these you know and kind of like a homegrown Let's you want to get raped hey everyone this lady wants to get raped Consent Dom was a really I knew it was a bad Name at the time and I just the consent the consent Dom it doesn't work at all It just sounded so I think in the dream. It was called the consent Dom so I was just so fixated

I'm in the dream it was called the consent dom, so I was just so fixated on it, I'm like, The consent dom! It's genius! I know, it was a bad idea! It came from a fucking manic fever dream, alright? Condom is two syllables. Consent dom is three. It doesn't make any sense, there's no flow to it. But I just got it. Condom consent dom. You just got that? That's how bad your thing was! He's been talking about this for 20 minutes and he had no idea. Well I didn't say it was good, but I think he at least understood the basic fucking concept of it. No, it's that awful.

Yeah, scams. That's the basic concept. Look, two weeks of my life, this is what I... This took you two weeks? No wonder Superkiller's late. I was probably busy jacking off the rest of it. All right? The consent of your penis? I was thinking about how much money I was going to make this rape lady, and it was just made me so horny But I never found a rape lady, and I just got tired of it. You're fucked you are fucked up Well now I'm making comic books, so everything's fine now. You should go back to making fake condoms

Maybe I'll make maybe I'll make a you know what I should make a run of these I would buy this. I'd buy a stuffed animal of this I'm just gonna make a couple I'll make a, you know what, I should make a run of these. I'll buy this. I buy a stuffed animal of this. I'm just gonna make a couple hundred of them. Anyway, so uh, idea dreams are my, dream ideas is my problem. Okay, Nick? There you go. Body cam footage. Body cam footage. Wait a minute, wait. Okay, now you can go.

Body cam footage. Body cam footage? Yeah, it's wait. Okay, now you can go. Bodycam footage. Bodycam footage? Yeah, it's terrible. It's really hard to get, you know? Like when you wanna get the bodycam footage. Obtaining bodycam footage. No, bodycam footage in general is terrible. There's more issues with it than just trying to acquire it. That's the first one.

The other is you get to see like how shitty cops are in general when you review it Making jokes little jokes in like they're jealous of stuff and they're not oh wait Did they say look at this house? They're like this house just keeps on going Consent Dom like Consent Dom. Consent Dom. Consent Dom dot com. Dot com. I can't believe how he's

created this house. I would be way better with this. No you wouldn't. You don't have it. You'll never have this house. That's why you're a small town cop. Being forced to raid an innocent American. Plus if you have funny stuff in your house, cops don't think your funny stuff is funny like they don't they don't they don't have a sense of you

They don't get the joke at all so when they like reach into a drawer and find like a giant dildo to link What's this for it's like this moment? Like you this small-town cop your hands are double fisting a giant floppy purple dildo like that's that's what's going on this way I got it But I do love body cam footage though because we get to see cops being shitty Yeah what about that lady that black lady that was like YAAAAAAA And the cop's like ba ba ba ba That poor little asian cop's like oh shi-

It ohhhhh We've got some good footage out of the body cams Body cam footage is entertaining I actually like the utility And you're learning about what the cops are doing to you too From the body cams. Body cam footage is entertaining. I actually like the utility. And you're learning about what the cops are doing to you too from the body cam footage. Yeah but it's a giant pain in the ass to go through it and all of them are assholes the entire time. Do you wear VR goggles while you're watching the body cam footage? Now that would be good. I'm gonna look around my house and see if they pointed guns at my kids.

To their credit they didn't point guns at the kids. That was nice of them. They didn't plant evidence though. We know that. I never claimed this at all. And what I said was, they will have to prove that it's my drugs, which is true. All drugs are your drugs.

They don't know where the drugs came from. I don't know where all the drugs, like I do now, but I didn't know what they found came from. I don't know where all the drugs, like I do now, but I didn't know what they found at the time they arrested me. Because I wasn't there when they found the stuff. I got a lot of drugs in there, officer. I don't know what you found. You got shovels?

Nick, it's good that you didn't look under the floorboard. It's shit, I shouldn't have said that. They're like, well, we opened. They call me Anne Frank. We opened your safe, and I'm like, like which one I have a bunch of saves. Yeah, yeah, that's a good one. I don't know what you found.

Did you open the cool one? What? They did. They did open the cool one. Did you open the one that only gay people can open? So here's what they did. The safe code is F-A-G. They take this safe outside of the house. It's in this, it's in our ensuite bathroom.

Yeah. And they take it all the way through the house, outside the house, they open the safe, and they're like, oh, there's drugs in here, we better take this right back inside. And then they take it into the front bathroom. Chain of custody. And they like take it out, and it's like,

you guys are spilling all the drugs. All over the place, what are you doing? You're getting cocaine all over, oh, come on. No one did drugs in that bathroom, I did drugs in the other one. Getting it all over the place. But um... You want to get crack heads? Because this is how you get crack heads. AHHHHH!

Hahahaha! You get these really shitty moments, like we have kids, obviously. And so, you have oral syringes to help deliver medicine into young children's mouths when they have like a fever. Like liquid Tylenol. Okay. When they opened our medicine drawer... Don't... I'm just listening to a story. I did Like okay

Liquid in the kids. Yeah, it's with you saying like that. I didn't know they did that Oh, that's really I started injecting fluids that his kids mouths. I'm like, oh, you're like, okay reason to say that I Come off your vagina. Like, okay! I'm just saying, you know, it's not a topic I hear a lot about. Sure. Tell me about injecting fluid into your children. Oh, so you know about that too, huh? That's what it sounded like.

Was that what it was? A knowing glance? Give these, like, obvious purpose medicinal aids to, like, help these kids take medicine. Okay. Because kids suck at taking pills. See? Sure. Like, I'm trying to shove pills in my kids' mouth they won't take. It's very hard to get those kids kids take medicine. Because kids suck at taking pills. See? Sure. Again. Like I'm trying to shove pills in my kids mouth they won't take. It's very hard to get those kids to take the pills. I agree.

I'm right there with you. You gotta put them in ice cream. You gotta really jam it in. You gotta get it back behind their teeth. Behind their teeth. Yeah. Right? So the cops open this medicine, it is a drawer full of like medicine stuff,

like the little cups that you drink. You should have booby-trapped your house. Dime-a-tap. And they're like, we got them. Syring drank. You should have booby-trapped your house. Dime a tap! And they're like, we got them! Syringes! And they're excited. And you should never be excited about finding syringes in someone's house if you think they're

doing heroin. But syringes with no needles. I've never injected a drug into me except for, like I have a prescription drug. Regardless, there are prescription drugs that need to be injected, so finding syringes is nothing. I take one every month. I take an allergy medicine that goes in the back of my ass every month. Diabetics need needles.

What is to being sober? Yeah. 100%. I just inject vodka into my... I cancel in. Well, cops are always... Cops always want to feel like they're smarter than everybody.

Did I ever tell you about the time that I... Well, usually they are smarter than the people there usually they are That's the thing. It's when they problem That's a slight bit smarter than the average dumb criminal like sometimes they're from a small town though They do ask you great questions. Yeah, like when I got so I got arrested and they questioned me at the scene And so I can say all this now April had stayed the night at the house, but none of us had gone to sleep. Like, I had been awake the entire night.

Whoa! Hi-yo! So... Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, No! So this is another thing people said that I lied about. Yeah. But the cops didn't ask me if April had been there overnight. Right. The cops asked me, did April sleep here last night? Eh, okay. And so I went, no. No, because there was no sleeping.

Not an idiot. I don't know, can you? No. Can I ask you something? So then we had that conversation at the house. So then they take me to jail. And then April left her cocaine in your safe, which is whatever. That cocaine, so the cocaine that was sitting on the nightstand is gone.

It doesn't exist. There's no evidence of it. And we found it! So on the body cam footage, they opened the container that was on the nightstand and it's full. I didn't know it was full, like I didn't remember. But it's full of cocaine. And then they close it up and they're like, well, we've, you know, our testing kits were running low on them and they're expensive so we'll test it.

Frank will test it in the car. Well, no seriously. What the fuck are you talking about? So they have these, they have field testing kits and field testing kits are specific to whatever drug you're looking for So you can't just... These cops are gay. You need a testing kit for cocaine? Well, it could be so nice. Well, there was also ketamine there, for example.

Yeah, you can't smell the difference. They're small town cops, man. I can. But no, so like, but the reagent kits... I think if the cop goes, hold on, I'll check the cocaine. And then goes, yeah, it is cocaine. I think they've got to use a swab, unfortunately. So there isn't a general drugs reagent kit.

You have to have the specific one. So if you find a white powder, there's like four things that it can be. And so you've got these four packets. So they didn't want to keep wasting the cocaine testing kits. So they say, we'll take it. You've got to mix them up.

We'll take it back to the station. They're say, we'll take it back to the station. They're like, we'll take this back to the station and check it there. So I get the evidence photos and the canister is empty. And they're like, oh, there's two grams of cocaine in it. It's like, where is it? It doesn't exist anywhere. No one knows where this cocaine went.

And like that's in the body cam. That's funny. But you're like- On the body cam we saw was full and now it's not full. You did a bunch of cocaine. The problem is body cams? It sounds like body cams is a good thing then. No, they're a big pain in the ass though.

They're a pain in the ass? If you introduce any part of the body cam, you introduce all of it. So like, if I wanna play a portion and be like, look, the cop fucked up here, they can be like, okay, we'll play the two hour body cam for the jury. And then you look like, like you cannot not look

like an asshole on body cam footage. With cops saying stuff about what an asshole you are across two hours. Cops are gay across. Cops killed George Floyd. And they're like, oh, this guy. Wait, that would unfairly predicate the jury if they got to listen to a cop be like,

ah, this guy's a real scumbag, what he did. Or whatever he's narrating it. Yeah. There's a rule of evidence called the rule of completeness. And so if you try to enter a partial piece of evidence into the trial, then they can say, no, there's context to it around that. And we have to have the complete picture. So wait, man, why don't they tell? I would imagine they would tell cops.

You know cops are always like pulling shit. Why didn't Noel tell everyone that he was going to get your body cam footage and then he didn't? Yeah, so it's fraud. Minnesota. Didn't he pay money to get it or some shit? Everyone paid. I paid nobody's money I paid Noel a hundred bucks to get your body cam footage and then he didn't deliver He should give it back. Or and he didn't do any push-ups. Don't you think that's fraud? He can't. It's unreasonable So Minnesota is a specific statute about body cam footage And if you're not autistic you understand exactly what it says and it says that body cam footage. And if you're not autistic, you understand exactly what it says. And it says that body cam footage that takes place on private property is private

because you have the subject. Like you're going through someone's house and not not all of that's related to criminal activity. The in fact, it's not available to the public, like a freedom of information act. Right. The only time now. Can you shout the N word while they're doing stuff? That definitely makes it inadmissible. It's a good thing to go. There's a provision to correct public perception

that is incorrect. Now, what that is, is the guy charged the officer with the knife, so that's why he shot him. And they're like, no, he was an innocent black child. A black lady charged him. Yeah, but the hands up don't shoot thing. Michael Brown charged the officer multiple times. So you would release the body cam footage to show, no,

in fact he did. It's in the public interest, is that what it is? Now, if you're autistic, you read that provision and go, no, Nick Lyden said it wasn't his drugs, the cops planted it, we need to undo the narrative. It's like, that's not the public interest they're talking about. Right, that's the Kiwi not the public interest they're talking about right that's the QE you're talking about a racial protest that has happened because of body

right yeah so and God knows the QE farms guys are not gonna organize to do fucking anything other than my hard drive can you let me see it and then maybe tomorrow we can put it on a projector screen on a big wall every fun to watch. I would tell Null about it, but he's so mean to me and disrespectful. He's such a bitch. He's not happy. As I said, look, it's actually interesting.

I have both of Null's internet dads in the same room. So he went from his original father, Dick Masterson, who he had a falling out with, and then he went and he latched on and said, well Nick Reketa will be my dad. He'll be my cool lawyer dad. Like imagine... Ah, you fucked that up, Null! falling out with and then he went and he latched on and said, well, Nick Arcata will be my dad. He'll be my cool lawyer dad. Like imagine- Ah, you fucked that up, no. The dad's got nobody.

Now I have a kid. Now I'm the family guy. Now he's the dad. Christ is king. Like imagine if your dad disappointed you and you're like, no, I'm gonna get a new one. I'm gonna get a new dad. Oh man, I can't even think about that.

That was that movie North. I'm so afraid of my dad that even thinking about him disappointing me was- My dad never hit me, but I was always a new dad. Oh man, I can't even think about that. That was that movie North. I'm so afraid of my dad that even thinking about him disappointing me was- My dad never hit me, but I was always afraid he would. Cause that's how, like, the idea is like, I'm gonna get my ass kicked if I do the wrong thing. So I just was pretty good as a kid, which is why I fucked up at the 40-year-old.

I'm just worried about my dad looking at my stock portfolio and going, oh, what are you doing? Just a disapproving thigh. Why do you have so many bonds? You should have bonds right now, Jesus Christ. Yeah, but what if he says, portfolio You should have bonds right now Jesus Christ yeah, but what if he says What if he says how come you didn't buy Palantir when your fat buddy told you never say that He starts if I asked my dad anything about stocks. He goes at your age I think oh no got me right back you got me on my heels already So you said you said cops are generally smarter than the person they're arresting.

So when they take me to jail, they're like- Oh, I almost made a little bit of an oopsie. When they take me to jail, they're like, will you come answer some questions? And okay, I know exactly how to assert my rights and not answer the questions I don't want to answer. Right. And I wanted to know what the cops knew, because I'm still in the dark. I don't know what they found.

I don't know. I have no idea. Playing mind games. And so I go in there in this. What do you mean you don't know what they found? I'd just been arrested and I was arrested before the search was done. Once they found the vial of cocaine, they hadn't even cracked the safe while I was there. And so they found the vial of cocaine. They're like, well, you I was there and so like they found a vial of cocaine

They're like well, you're going to jail and they're like those are track marks on your own Oh, yeah, I remember that shit, but um the drug recognition experts. They're so fucking stupid I was watching a stream on Twitch and you were having too much fun Drugs pretty much yeah, but so they get me into the interrogation room in the That's fine. Just right in the middle of my story. Yeah, you so they get me into the interrogation room in the air back. That's fine Just right in the middle of my story. Yeah, you know why not? Should I like wait until the story? I don't know should I tell it to spite him? Uh, I don't know what we do with him gun. How you been Nick? I've been better. Yeah No, I'm I'm doing much better than I was. It's not the worst possible situation, it sounds like.

The hardest part was knowing that it was going to resolve eventually. Yeah. But you can't say anything that mattered until it resolved. And so once I pled guilty, I'm like, well, this is really easy because it's my drugs in the safe. I'm not trying to obscure anything. Now you can talk about it. You don't got to worry about saying the wrong thing.

I can go online and be like, yeah, it was my drugs. I fucked up. I had a bunch of drugs. And that's consistent. Dick Masterson forced me to do them. Yeah. I was holding them for him. And a magic autistic child's medallion poisoned my brain. He's like, I want to trade them to the cartel for Bitcoin.

And I was like, Dick, I don't think you should do that. That sounds like a federal crime. I have logs of all these conversations. Well, we all have our... But no, once I was able to plead guilty, it's like I've been just waiting to either beat the charge on constitutional rights or it's going to be basically plead guilty. Now we had a pretty interesting case. There's a lot of factors to my case that make it it's easy generally to prove that someone has

cocaine in their house and it's theirs. Right. But when you have other people that have access to that house. It could be anybody. It could really like the cops have no idea. So I did say this morning. A sneaky man who calls himself the Toe and is always just sneaking around creeping around toeing it up. People like Nick accused him of that. Accused Aaron of leaving drugs in his house. Aaron's a fucking dork. Aaron, I think Aaron emailed me and he wanted to he said, he said, I don't want this to be weird, but if you sent me

a vial of your semen, I'll pay any amount. It's like, I will drink that. I got that. I got that that. I got that email. Rocketmail.com Rocketmail You got that email too? Maybe he could do a come taste test. Which one's me and which one's Vito?

Do you remember when he would message you He would message you probably around between 9 pm your time and like 11 pm your time? like 11 p.m. your time? No, I don't know. I actually don't. No, why? So I don't know what platform he would do it,

but when he would get high on Molly, he'd be like, and he'd start messaging you like a bunch of really gay shit. What, you mean me? Yeah. He would message you and he would message me this shit like- No!

You guys write a group text? No! No, no, no. What do you mean me? He messaged you, I don't know what platform. He would message you in the middle I hope he doesn't know about my secret grinder account, but he's like cuz he would tell me about the messages like

I didn't see these messages. He would tell me about them Grindr I didn't see these messages. He would tell me about them. He'd be like He would get on Molly and he could not put his fucking phone down So you just sit there texting people a bunch of like he'd be like, yeah, you're so funny and stuff like that He'd send you like these gay messages I don't know. Are you talking about really? I'm just telling you what he told me because he would eventually would you steal my cum? But wait, how does he tell the story said hey, you know what I texted dick last night. I said no he's so funny Here's exactly how you would tell this how we told the story goes dude

I gotta put my phone away when I'm on Molly like yes, you should definitely do that Okay, he was texting some random guy thought it was you I think So he I thought it was you I think Only went to reddit dick show instead of the dick Sean probably he would he would send me shit It wasn't like gay or like Yeah, it's like the concept of it's gay, but you would just send stuff like oh man I'm having such a good time tonight or whatever. I'm like that's And and it's like we just be sitting there singing karaoke, right? Like yeah, and he'd start texting and texting a man high on Molly to karaoke event. That's two men Cuz he was texting you in his mind. What the fuck are you talking about?

But he told me that's on you didn't say karaoke was involved now. I get it That's when he that's when I found out is when he's like he's like I gotta put my phone away cuz I Yeah, I wake up and I look at my phone away. What's his name here, Steeltow? Yeah. I wake up and I look at my phone. I do have texts from him. Wait, really? Yeah, I just searched for that name on Twitter. What does it say?

This'll be great. Would you mind coming on Steeltow to talk about this bullshit? Oh, this is 2023? 2023, is that after? No, that's before you got arrested. That must be before, yeah. I was arrested in 24.

Is that allowed? I really don't like what's happening to you or your channel. Oh, it's cause your channel, probably when your channel got deleted, he wanted to have you come on. I said, when do you guys do your show? Yeah, okay. It'd have to be December or after.

And I said, yeah, give me a couple of days. I'll be there. I guess I didn't. He said, awesome, Looking forward to it. He says, talking to Nick right, this is January, 2024. So he's in my house doing Molly. Is this after he ate cum? Hold on.

Can he still taste the cum? I'm thinking of the timeline. After he ate cum could be any sort of time frame. Talking to Nick right now, didn't know you even knew about us. Oh, that's a Molly message, bro. Uh-oh, uh-oh. Dude, yeah, so you told me he's like,

I gotta put my phone away when I'm on Molly. Let's have you on sometime. Okay, don't ever talk to me like, that's an instant I'm out. Let's have you on sometime and hopefully see you sometime in Florida in March. Yeah, you guys are hilarious. Well, hopefully we can hang out in March.

I can't go to that. We're very up in the air on that show too. That sucks. How I was gonna make my, no, these are all at like 7 p.m. I don't know. Symbian, your time is 9 p.m. my time. Oh yeah, true. The January one, that like kind of weird one.

What's his Twitter name? Cum Eat. Yeah, Cum Eater. Cum Eater. Nick's Cum. But so I didn't know he was texting you. Cum Guslin. That like what kind of weird one? Come eat you know either Next come but so I didn't know he was texting him He told me I got to put my phone away cuz I'll wake up in the morning I look at all these messages I sent to Dick Masterson like what I'm like fucking weird don't ever text Do you want to see how much calm I can drink? No, but so I say Last week actually I don't know I still so I saved this for you. That's from last week, actually. I don't know why I still see them. So I saved this for you since you went to the bathroom.

Yes. So the cops take me into the interrogation room. They sit me down, and the cop looks at me, the lead detective, Detective Quinn Pomplin. And he says, look at that cum. That looks tasty. Get those balls out. I got you.

Just like that. And I'm like, cool. Were you trying? Yeah. Because I wasn't trying to get away from you. I had no idea this was going on. He's like cool well like were you trying yeah cuz I wasn't trying to get away from you I had no idea this is going on he's like I fucking got you he did get me eat this footage I have the audio of it oh I want to hear this yeah they record all this shit they have to give it to you he had

you have I got you on audio yes I Okay. Here's the next thing. So his partner is a guy shaped like a bowling ball. He makes you look good. I was gonna say, I identify with that. He pulls up his utility belt, right? Like they got the the bat belt on. Yeah. You're telling me I'd be a great cop is what I'm hearing. And he goes, are we gonna find your DNA on cocaine? Are we gonna find your DNA on cocaine? Are we going to find your DNA on cocaine? And I said, I said, good luck. I don't think so. I mean, is this like a question?

Should there be a question? No. My mind is blown at this point. I go, are you going to find DNA on cocaine? My DNA? I said, I don't know. I'm not a chemist. Like, I don't know if that even works.

No, I'm not a chemist. I could say no. You know what I mean like on the bags We can find your DNA and fingerprints on bags of cocaine like I don't know what you're gonna find. I don't know Are you gay? I have no idea Hahahaha See I am like If I knew this would all be recorded

Yeah, exactly if I knew if I know all this being recorded. I mean, I don't know you're the one that's not gay So you say you might you might find a sphincter says what what? But this is a caliber like you interrogation that was so excited to get me popples Pomplin there's nothing in their bags. So work. Yeah, that guy so work there Yeah, he's like he's like one of the lead detectives in the county. That's crazy. But I was like, you got me, what are you talking about? And then you read the search warrant thing, it's like-

What race is he? He's white. Shame. Yeah. Goes to my church. He goes to your church? Yeah. The new one, not the old one.

Oh, the new one. Do you see him there? Les Rats. No, he goes to the morning service I don't I'm not up that early But that was the caliber of interrogation and then they'd be like so is that your cocaine the savers We're not gonna answer that question dude like I'm gonna plead my fifth amendment right here. It's yours actually We mean you are gay lovers. You gave it to me remember. Yeah, you gave it to me. No you did We mean you are gay lovers you gave it to me remember. Yeah, you gave it to me. No you did

At the flying jay, I love the interrogation video. Do you watch the interrogation videos on YouTube ever? Yeah, those are great Yeah, yeah, I hate to say it. You know a lot of the times Usually the person getting what are you talking about? What do you mean? I like the ones where it's like are you wearing a Negro baseball? You know what I shouldn't tell this why why I like watch them wearing my Negro base Young criminal whoo, you know, it's crying about I wanted to be a doctor They're never gonna let me be a doctor and I'm like you weren't gonna be a fucking doctor What does that have to do with the Negro League? I have nothing- nothing at all. He could have been a great baseball player perhaps. All of those interrogation videos I've watched are white people.

Really? Yeah, actually. I see a mix. No, not in the first place. I know. I don't want to watch them interrogate a black person. I know. I want to watch them too.

Well, think about watching you and Eric July. The reason the black interrogation's- Well, you're about to see your- Everybody likes your interrogation of a black individual. Well, what is this? Well, there's a gate over there. Oh, lordy. No, it's a private business. The reason the black ones are good is for some reason they always bring in the mom.

And the black mom- Glanzer! Ah, damn you! What are you doing? You gotta tell this cop what you did! She's the most unhelpful person they could bring in. It's the worst giving the worst legal advice. I told you selling drugs was gonna get you in trouble. Like, mom, fuck off!

They literally will say in the video, you gotta tell them exactly what happened. That's the only way out of this. And I'm like, no, no, no! The kids are like, alright, well mom said I have to tell you exactly what happened in Great V-Tale. So you're anti-body cam footage. No, I hate it. You hate it. I hate the... Your antiBodycam footage. No, I hate it. Like, I hate it. You hate it.

I hate the... Your anti-Bodycam footage. No, I hate it. Nick, we're all very confused about your stance on Bodycam footage. Very loyally about it. It's funny though. It is funny. No, I do like Bodycam footage.

I think it's done a ton of good work. Yeah, and some of the legalese around it and the way it operates. But it really puts... It really fucks with black people, right? Exactly. I mean, I hate it. It's not fair. It really has shown us how shitty it is to be a cop, right?

Yeah, right, that's what I think every time I see it. Wow, it sure sucks to be a cop. Gah! Don't get me wrong, I still hate them. There's a mix, you know? Sometimes the cops go a little far, sometimes the criminals go a little far. Sometimes the criminals go a little far. Whoever loses here, I'm for it.

You know the thing where you hate something, but then when it happens to you, you kind of change your opinion on it? Marriage. Get ready. But no, so I like body cam footage in some respects. But the body cam footage paints this picture that isn't correct, because it's narrated by a biased narrator with no fucking knowledge of what's going on.

Here's where this perp scum keeps his whores. And here's the fucking safe where he's got his go-go juice powder. The white powder flame that we got him on. Like when they pick up a 22 show from like an Amazon flower pot That's like a joke. They're like he's been firing guns in his bedroom I'm like where are the holes you see these needles? To inject his kids with pure Bain juice. He's trying to turn his kids into Bain. They fucked you up, man Yeah, it's been a you up. It's been like

Absolute it's the definition of abject. It's an abject disaster and it's gonna take a while to fix it. Look at this guy. That's your brain. This is your brain on Vio. This is your brain on Lard. This is your brain on Taco Bell's street cantina tacos, which my uh, my voted up. They're back. So. Don't save it til next week. I'll save it for next week. Alright, that's a shout out everybody. Thank you guys! Don't forget to check out all the problems at biggestproblem.show.

Uh, vote for them there. We also have our bonus episodes at patreon.com slash biggest problem and our good friend Nick Ricada is here! Okay, now we're reading your fucking super chats! They better be good! If they're not good. We won't read them Are you allowed to stream these days? What are you doing? Yeah, I so

It's funny how things work in parallels like I have my legal issues But I also had some personal issues that have been brewing for a couple years that I tried to like I Really worked on keeping that private because it's not for public stuff Yeah and that shit came to a head and was keeping that private because it's not for public stuff. Yeah. And that shit came to a head and was kind of devastating for a while. And I didn't want to bring that energy onto a stream

because I don't want to go on a show and be like, guys, I'm really sad and everything sucks. That's all my streams. I know. I don't want to ever do that. Streams are fucked. And so like I was going to play Sonic the Hedgehog and I want to kill myself.

He's selling like cards. He's selling cards. Hey, that's different. That's fun. Everybody has fun on the card streams. What's your what-not thing? Are you doing that tonight? Not tonight I got I do have my new shelves for selling cards, but not to interrupt go ahead No, it's just like I wanted to come back and bring good energy Talk about law talk about Trump because I think this shit Trump's doing is the funniest thing you can amazing

It's amazing and agree that to breaking agree that to make an omelet, you gotta break a few eggs? Yeah, I mean absolutely. And Trump is just, so it's like, Ah! No. To break an omelet, you have to make a few eggs. Sometimes you gotta toss some laws out.

It's true also, you still have to make the eggs to break the omelet. You gotta make the eggs to break the omelet. You gotta make the eggs to break the omelet. If you wanna get raped by Haitians, that's your business. No one wants to get raped by you do So it's for the good of America exactly get rid of hey as long as they signed the consent Dom ahead of time We've got no issues guys making like pretend condoms with a form in them Yeah, that's you should be able to breathe. Yeah, you should be killed.

I gave him an opportunity to promote whatever the fuck he's doing and somehow it turns into Vito's not allowed to breathe. He doesn't need promotion, he's the hottest commodity that there is. Well how do we find you, what's the URL? Pacer.com Yeah, Pacer.com No, you gotta go to Search for Nicholas Riketa You gotta go to MNCRO, which is Minnesota Court Records online.

Yeah, there you go. Type in Nicholas Riketa. No, it's you can find me on Riketa Law on YouTube. You can find me Riketa Law everywhere. YouTube, Twitter, Rumble. How's your kids handling all this? They're really resilient. They're awesome.

Like, the government taught my kids to hate the government before I ever even got the chance. Yeah, that's cool. And, what people- Do they teach your kids to use shampoo before they go in for a fucking drug test? Come on. Fucking they almost want to talk about hygiene today.

We're washing our hair every day now. I do, I take constant baths and showers. What is this? I'm saying kids. Oh, okay, I thought you were ripping on me again. How did you miss that joke? Oh my okay. I thought you were ripping out me again. How did you miss that joke? Oh my gosh. But maybe the shampoo did it though.

Because some kind of weird herbal shampoos can do it. The test exists to put black people in prison. The test, they actually washed the hair that they cut off to have external contaminants. The thing is, the wash, there's a study out there that shows that the wash forces cocaine into the hair follicle, or into the hair. And I've looked at the... Nah, it just makes it up. It's not as accurate as you're saying. They're supposed to provide you with the test results of the wash, along with the test results

from the hair, because you can find out if there's like an external contaminant that has been forced into the hair. They didn't give us any of that because they didn't accuse us of anything. Bro, they can come from anywhere. But no, it's a, fuck, I had a thing I was gonna say. It doesn't matter. Sometimes you're having a cocaine fight, kid walks in, okay? Anything could happen.

No! We were just- Anything can happen. Weoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Thanks. Straturgery. Straturgery revived it mostly, you know. Yeah, I mean, it sucked for a while. It will still suck for a while, but like, all that shit's in the past. Like it's just now it's a timeline, it's government's timeline. It's like the Holocaust. Doesn't matter. Okay. Well, I don't know if that's the case. I was also going to mention-

Mine situation's worse, because mine's real. Might happen to me. Okay. You're now listening to the show on Rumble, because we're not on YouTube anymore. I did want to mention, I think, Nick Reketa, can I say this? You may be at a certain event. No. OK.

Why would you? Two months from now. Hackamania. Hackamania. Yes. Why would you ask about that to me? Ask him. Because the camera is there.

I'm facing the camera. You. I'm facing the camera idiot Tomorrow, what do you call it? Not tomorrow in May shut the fuck up. You got me all fucked up. We're at hackamania So I'll be I'll be in hackamania Shared comedy show we're all doing People we're trying to promote the fucking thing I don't give a shit about I know you already sold the tickets Tickets they're not sold out sales guy like pretending to do sales

WATP when I open the fucking video it goes hey guys we're gonna be at hack a mania I go you know that Carl is a professional Caster because that's how you tell people something's going on. I don't fucking care about that stuff. I don't care if you care, it's a nice thing to do. They invited us to the thing, we should try to sell tickets. Now we fucking sold, okay we tried to sell a couple of tickets. And we should still tell tickets. Yes, every show we should promote Hackamania.

It's part of it, it's a thing we're doing. Does Patrick Melton plug us all the time? No. He's promoting Hackamania, which we're going to be at. He's not plugging us all the time? No. He promotes Hackamania, which we're gonna be at. He's not plugging us all the time though, so why are we fucking plugging Hackamania all the time? I wasn't gonna make it a big thing, I'm just saying, Hackamania in the-

You have made this into a way bigger ad than he would have ever done. Thank you, it was gonna be a two second plug. It's just crazy, it's crazy. It's not crazy if you interrupt it and you draw it out of this fucking bullshit. I mean, it's just like, how come we don't get a plug? You do the plug, then. You say, nobody come to Hackamania, it's pointless.

Where the fuck is our plug? Where is our plug? Go listen to Biggest Problem in the Universe. It's not just Melted. You stream 24 hours a day, because you got to fucking stream feed all day that Vito tried to do. They mention our show. They mention it like a one-off, like, ah, these guys are involved too. Like you're selling fucking magazines. Plug the show, like, go listen to the show. Go listen to the show! Go listen to it!

Nick Prakate is on. Vito's on, who's a big friend of, you know, wink wink. Shut up. We're all gonna be in Vegas, we're all gonna have fun. It's gonna be a fun event, and if you're a fan of the show and the other shows and whatever else, you should come out and hang out with us. That's it emphasis on the cum Come yeah, maybe Aaron Emholt's gonna be there boxing for some fucking reason. I'm gonna rape him good Come watch thickness and rape Aaron Emholt. It's gonna be Let's bang through these super chats sir turn dream for two. Hey beats. How are you? Hey dicks? I'm gonna look him in the eyes. I'm gonna show you, you can't forget. I'm not gonna look him in the eyes. I'll look at a lady.

Let's bang through these super chats. Stratergery for two, hey Vietz, how are ya? Hey Dix, all good. We're doing good. Coo for two, thanks for not killing yourselves, thank you. Coo for another five. When is the biggest coffee in the universe going on sale? I miss new project brew.

I miss it too, it just wasn't worth it. I mean that's the difference between me and like all these other guys. I'm like, oh, that's, you know, it's just not making money. It's a waste of time. It's a fun idea, but it's not making money. My merch store was- You don't go, oh if I bought an $80,000 K-Cut machine and got it sold on Amazon, that would be working. I need to be the lesbians.

My merch store was making a joke on a t-shirt on spring and that's all that I cared about I didn't care if anybody ever bought it because it was free like you just make the joke It's like look at this shirt I made and then- it's funny. And then that's it Do you remember when they had the OJ slammer the OJ Simpson? Had the guilty not guilty the guilty not guilty slammer They were fucking great if we made a Nick Reketa guilty not guilty slammer I would want I want one you want everything well I'm gonna 3d print one then and then I'll be the only one who has one. It's cool. Okay pogs are back by the way

I don't know if you saw it's really cool of you to do that. I would be cool. Well, we're going to make them. Cameron for two. Be honest Vito from one to 10. How mentally ill are you 10? Balder for two. I'm sorry Vito. Would you like a pizza? I would. Pizza this dick in your ass. How about a pizza juice nice? I was getting to that, but feel free to skip ahead. Britsman for two I hope ice raids dick so he can taste his own bigotry. Yeah. Dribbles for five there was once a pig named Vito said super killer would be neato it's still not out he has a big snout. Has a big snout and he's constantly called a Vito. Ah ha ha ha ha. Baldur's gay. How about a pizza these nuts.

We did that already. Frog washing for two. Excuse me Rotundo where's my refundo? It's coming very soon. You're getting very good at rhyming on your channel. I refunded a couple people. So we're good. Nah, people are fucking pissed. There's like one guy. People are pissed at you.

That's fine, they're not gonna be un-pissed at me. Just send them 200 bucks, what's the deal? It's not 200 bucks. It's 300 bucks. I refunded the three guys who wanted a refund. Jay-Z Denton for five, are you guys gonna review a working man? It's based on a book written by Chuck Dixon. No.

Jay-Z for two says, Vito, can you ban me on Twitter? Absolutely. gonna review a working man it's based on a book written by Chuck Dixon no jay-z for two says video can you ban me on Twitter absolutely FYE for two love the show thanks guys Lawrence the baby for two biggest narrative in the universe we got a new narrative that's been broken oh yeah we might have to do a bonus episode the The second installment of FUN Eric. I'm not participating in the FUN Eric. It's about fun. I understand the meme. I love when a guy's like, they do the struggle session video they're like look guys, I just want to come on here and I want to have fun. It's like you look like you're being murdered right now, like this doesn't seem fun at all. I'm tired of talking about this. I just want to keep talking about these fun subjects. I just want to have fun. It's like you look like you're being murdered right now. Like this doesn't seem fun at all. I'm tired of talking about this.

I just want to keep talking about these fun subjects. I just want to have fun. I've never thought that. Ever in my life, I'm like, gosh, I just want to get back to having fun. Aww. I think we're going to have a lot of fun. Don't have too much fun, guys. Eric Joliet has a new co-op humanity.

Part two has dropped. We're probably going to do it as a bonus episode. It's called FUN. Because again, it would take another two hours to go through it. Guys Eric has a new copumentary part two has dropped. We're probably do it as a bonus episode again It would take another two hours to go through it. Yeah, so you're gonna want to sign up at patreon.com Biggest problem this one will not be public if you end number two be a legit private bonus episode Let's see SP. I also wanted to mention speaking of merchandise you start reading a chant and then you stop well Shut up dick Speaking of merchandise. You start reading and chatting and then you stop. Well, shut up. Uh, Dick, you like t-shirts,

don't you? Okay. No. Do we have black? What color t-shirts are your favorite? Why don't you head on over to killdozer.industries and take a quick look to see if I actually don't know if on over to killdozer.industries YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS There's the trucks me shirt. Hey black large

Yeah, look at that. Yeah, you did it cool. I think you know what I think I think it was available just not in I think it was only small and super small were sold out the whole time I don't know whatever it's working now. You can get a black shirt. It was always available. You fucked it up somehow I didn't fuck it up clearly obviously fucking printful fucked it up All the black shirts in the world were not sold out for a year and a half They shit I think something happened where black shirts went out of stock and then when they came back into stock it didn't repopulate the store Last time black things went out of stock They don't send me a message saying hey, it's back you got to like re- had to read fucking add the whole thing. It was a whole thing. Okay, you did it

You did great. Thanks. Thank you. Can you finish the super chat? You started 12 minutes ago SP for five I wish where Eric went all in on his gay space guy stuff Zanlin what fucks must suck would have been hilarious Hot fart dingle durr for five using all the characters in super chat. That's pisses me off That's pisses me off. That's pisses me off LJ clobberina for two rich are you giving your son the circumcision snip cry Baldr for two bigger wiener Well, good luck with our flesh on the wieners. That's my idea Baldr for two Vito I hate you. You really gotta you really gotta keep an eye on him in the hospital though There's just Jewish guys running through the hallways with scissors. You gotta be like ah stay out of there leave him alone

I know I called I'm flying Nick Fuentes in good keep an eye out The door is Kanye's gonna be there and then good guys I'm not joking around The delivery nurse is like a woman with these curly sideburns go on to you. Hi, I'm Dr. Brown Stop bitch! Stop right there! What was your birth name? Nothing. Brownstein? Brownstein and Switz. Get the fuck out of here! Oh man I spilled all these pennies everywhere. What's happening? He's just pent up for it. Yeah, you just throw a bunch of pennies in the hall and any doctor gets on his knees to grab them. You go, not him, not him, not him. That guy. That's my doctor.

Armenians are kind of like Jews. Yeah, well those you can spot a lot easier. Yeah, they're good. We have an Armenian doctor, I think. Maybe it's Maddox. He should invite Maddox just for the fun of it. For the birth of my baby? Yeah, so he wants the birth. It's kind of like he's responsible for it, right? Video it or whatever. Go Maddox, look, all your desperate pleading and pathetic crying birthed life. I do kind of feel like it is. He's probably read a wikiHow on how to deliver a baby,

just in case he ever needs to. You're probably right. I know I'm right. That wasn't a joke. That was dead serious. New Box Kingdom for two, obligatory mention of Vito's head scum trademark. StuK for two, when life gives you lemons, you eat them.

Did you see the copyright trademark thing and the ISOM statue? I did see that. You did see that? He put a ice some What was it was a copyright with a TM neck over the word copyright? Hey, that's not how you do that no Gabe. Oh for 10 says money. Thank you. Fashionably unemployed for two You should look at the Glen Haywood thing going on. Who's Glen Haywood not for two bucks Hey, would you blow me? Hey, would you blow me fucking Christ? He got me

Not for two bucks. Hey, would you blow me? Hey, would you blow me? fucking Christ he got me Majanga for five jokes are funny and super chats are super George Sears Ian Miller first a name from the past see a bad guy George Sears He like went crazy and then went crazy. I don't even know I got a I got a message from the other day He's just like he just said a bunch of sweary stuff Well, Ian Miller for family disappointed him is demanding booty and I think we will oblige. Hotfar Dingledorf for five, streamers being late and gay. That pisses me off. Camera for two says Nick, is that dandruff?

Yeah, I'm sitting next to Vito. Purple Pawsome for 50. Can we make a trip during Hackamania to the Heart Attack Grill so we check out their cool scale outside? We willamania to the Heart Attack Grill? So we check out their cool scale outside. We will be close to the Heart Attack Grill, because we are going to be on Fremont Street, which is fun. Fremont. Fremont. It's not Fremont.

Whatever. I'm going to go to the- How do you see that and say Fremont? Well, there's not a second E. If there was a second E, I would clearly say Fremont. Vito, I try to like you sometimes. Okay, what do you call it? It's just like fucking retarded.

Did you ever read Dune? They're not called the Freeman. They're called the Fremen. There you go. I will be at the D playing their vintage horse racing mechanical gambling machine. If anybody would like to come. Have you ever seen that thing, Beck? No. They have a classic 1950s mechanical horse racing gambling game. Yeah, where they go k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k It's very cool. Pineapple Man for two, RIP melee guy. That's true. That guy who liked Smash Brothers killed himself because he wasn't allowed to play Smash Brothers anymore. People want me to talk about that, but I don't know enough about it.

Johnny Rocket for 10. Did you hear the impractical jokers had not one, but two veto situations. P.S. Back the Maniac. The Maniac currently available on Indiegogo. Is that correct? Check out the Maniac spelled M-A-N-I-A-K, written by Johnny Rocket and featuring art

from our good friend Corgan. Hot for our DingleDorf for five, everyone in this chat loves Nick, we're straight up Nickers, we like Nick, Nick is funny, any other Nicker with me. You're saying bad words. Very terrible. No, I'm not. Yeah, you're saying that. Hateful.

No, I'm not, I'm saying Nick. Dean Shock for Till, RIP hacks the shine God Thanks for the show. Yeah, it is bad. That guy was a bad guy. He deserved to stop it What the fuck is wrong with you fuck him always do this? What was he saying? He was saying bad stuff. He said a different smash guy was like Hitler and he got Comparing he's like just like saying people are Hitler. Yeah, we've never done anything like that on this show. I haven't. I haven't said someone's bad so they're Hitler. So fuck them.

No, you said the reverse where you said, ah, it's like the Holocaust because it didn't happen. I didn't say that. He said something close to that. He deserved to die. Don't say that. We do not want... Why? He's dead. It is sad that he died. I actually got a lot of grief because... I'm not sad at all. Did you see that is I was and that Hitler died No, I'm not sad that Hitler that was good

Around all down. You're Hitler. You're Hitler. Yeah, I was getting called a Nazi all week because did you see was he skipping like that? Do you like yeah, he was hacks his mom posted. Hey, he's in the hospital. He might die. She way I don't fucking know what his mom posted hey, he's in the hospital he might die. She way I don't fucking know what his mom ways man But I was the only person she responded to and she was like oh thanks for looking out for mom Yeah, I talked to it was weird I was getting all these messages from people where they're like why is hacks mom talking to this Nazi and I'm like I barely Even know what's going on, but I was getting like all the smash Oh, she I don't fucking know but apparently out of like she had was getting like all the Smash community. How old is she? I don't fucking know, but apparently out of like-

Does she have big tits? Out of the hundreds of people who responded to the situation, I was the only one where she's like, well yeah, it is really bad, you know, what's going on? You do have this power where people will talk to you. I'm very good. You know Palmer Lucky follows me on Twitter? That's insane. That guy's like a billionaire.

I've DM'd with Palmer Lucky about like, hey, what's going on man? Why are you still poor? I don't know, I'm really bad at- well I've tried to get him Lucky about like hey, what's going on man? Are you still poor? I don't know I'm really bad at well I've tried to get him to come on the show and he was like I don't think it would be good for me to come On your podcast right now It would be fun to have them on I'm also whatever I'm followed by some weird guys Yeah, I find it weird. It's cuz I have fun tweets everyone like to eat Epstein Network all these guys all the abstin

No, Palmer Lucky is not an Epstein. Palmer Lucky is saving America with drones. What does that guy's mom look like? Hacks his mom. I don't know, man. Ah. I'll shack up with Hacks' mom in her time of grief. She clearly likes me.

Just look. I'll find out. JuH for 10. Nice to see you, Mr. Rackets. Hey, thanks. LJClauberino for two. How much gooning is too much gooning? It's never enough.

Johnny Rockets, five. Cool to see Nick and Rick together again. Also, potentially criminal lost a lot of weight. Oh wait, that guy is big. Cause he was fucking fat as fuck. No, he's saying his wife was fat. Oh, he didn't lose the weight. He downgraded from a couch to a love seat.

He's saying that I'm couch to a love seat. He's saying that I'm less fat than potentially criminal. He was a big fat piece of shit. Sorry, I messed up. Sorry to potentially criminal Ian's wife. How's your relationship with Yellow Flash these days? Oh, it's been bad for a long time. He said he's going to fight Vito. Yellow Flash is going to fight you?

He said he would fight me if he saw me and I said, well, why don't we set it up? We'll make it happen. He says he's gonna beat the come out of him And then he said I was at comic-con I would have fought you if you came to comic-con like bitch I didn't fucking know you're at comic-con. I don't fucking know. I'll keep track of your schedule trying to be like I ducked the If he said come to comic-con we'll fight I would have been like, alright, yeah, let's do it Yeah, but it said I had to keep track of his schedule and know where the fuck he was. Nuckin' Futs for 10. Biggest problem in the universe. Aside from Vito's sockless feet are food enablers. No help is needed to stay fat, let alone encourage someone else to stay fat.

Everyone needs to lose 20 pounds. True. MC Lightsaber for 10. Nick needs to sing a cover of Push It to the Limit. It would definitely be better than Eric's cover of of chop suey or the other screamo emo songs he did i would just do uh i would do that song be a man i love the cocaine i love the cocaine i mean you could just do that clapton down to the ground I need a new drug. That would be a good one. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da. Utah bass, I'm meeting you for two nights to eat the kingpin of the cornfields again. Pitcher for ten, holy shit, a lawyer. Imagine Eric having a lawyer on stream so he can hit him with some Razzmatazz.

Buck Cherry lit up. That's the song. But it's a good song. I'm gonna go with the song. I'm gonna go with the song. I'm gonna go with the song. I'm gonna go with the song. I'm gonna go with the song. I'm gonna go with the song. Pitcher for 10. Holy shit a lawyer. Straturgy for 10. Imagine Eric having a lawyer on stream so he can hit him with some

Razzmatazz. Buck Cherry lit up. That's the song. But as soon as he brings up his 3D asset comic book scam, it trucks dicks in my ass. Nobody wants that dicks and feets. Glow in the dark CIA for 5. Sorry for spamming horse puss in your discord that one time, Riketa. Hope you and your family are well. Go fuck yourself. ShoeboxKing number 5. I'm not gonna be mean to Nick. I've missed him. Good to see you back, buddy. Why'd you say that first part about I'm not gonna be mean then?

I don't know. Like what are you? I don't know. The hell is that? I'm not gonna be mean. Who is that for? But like you can be mean. It's fine. I think he's saying other people are being mean, but he doesn't want to make light of the situation or tease the man. Just say it's good to see you back. Why is there the, I'm not gonna be mean to you.

I think he's saying he disapproves of the people making jokes about the situation. Then say that. Yeah. Chirixis for two, American Beauty was a terrible, horrible, bad movie. I agree. You're obsessed with that movie.

I agree, now I live my life like a day man. Kated the Swiss for five, Nick, get your lanky ass back on the internet, fucker. I don't care about your feelings I want to laugh again just once before I die. We'll try and make it happen Renox is for five promise to kill yourself after you laugh Well, we're not just five says I'd love to have a veto plushie, but I didn't qualify a fuck me I guess you can still buy one if you're a patreon follower

If you really want one clap trap to destroy five, I'm just glad my good friend Nick is on this episode. ClipSama for two says, Nick, what did you think of Vito's thumbnail of you? I didn't see it. It was when you got arrested you were behind bars. It was a nice mugshot you had I thought. It was my mugshot? I love that thing. That mugshot's pretty good because you got this like Charlie Brown fucking aura about you. It reminds me of Nicolas Cage in Raising Arizona. Yeah, somebody ripped the football up. His mugshot where he's got the black guy and I was like, oh, that's funny.

It's a good mugshot. Hazman for two, Nicker with the Coke, Frog Tony for two, small face podcaster and black face lawyer, best duo. Two bucks, Frog Tony, you got more than two bucks. No, he doesn't. Frog Tony's saving up. Utah based Armenian for two, we all know than two bucks. No, he doesn't. Frog Tony is saving up. Utah-based Armenian for two.

We all know it's powdered doughnut on Vito's lip. There are doughnuts upstairs. And I had a little bit. Davy the Dope for five. Nick, who wins in a fight between Vito and PPP? Vito by a wide margin. How tall is PPP? He looks short.

He's tall. Is he? Yeah, he's tall. He's like 6'2 to 6'4. Interesting. LaGwandan T-Rex for two. You look like Chewbacca Jabba and a Jewish lawyer. 0.024 for six euros.

My right hand me can't finish me off normally after surviving a stroke. And my bitches in rehab, that's pisses me off. Missed Nick's beak. So he's having trouble masturbating. My right hand can't finish me off. You's what you gotta say. That pisses me off. You gotta go with your left hand, man. Yeah, you gotta be a lefty.

Black Crimson for five. You guys have had a lot of good guests on the show, but can you try and have on Phil? Dark Side Phil? Probably Dark Side Phil. Yeah, we should talk to that guy. I don't know. Justin Brodick for five. Be careful, Dick. Nick will give you your unborn child coke like he did his kids. Come on. Now you give other people's kids way worse coke. Yeah you're not wasting your

coke on other people's kids you want your kids to be all energetic so they're running around you know. There's a lot of fat kids these days if only my dad had given me coke I wouldn't you know I would be doing better. That is like the last person that needs coke is a kid. They got a lot of energy already. Have some coke. Youaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Have some coke. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Just giving them the same superpower. Okay. Yeah, I mean, that's why they have adrenochrome is because it's just basically rich people super coke. I mean, it's your work to force-feed women coke.

Terrible. I don't. Terrible. Nothing about the hangover I want a kid's gonna run well as we remember Black crim or who asked us if we were gonna have Phil on oh that was black crims He says can you have on Phil he then wanted to say fill up on D's nuts Which is a terrible follow-up fork in the Burke for two dash for ricketa Don't blow it all at once a little David to for five. Nick looks fantastic. They should take his kids more often.

God damn it. I did kind of think, like, Hey, he looks good. Now that I'm having a kid, I'm like, oh man, that was probably kind of a little bit. Probably a good relief there. A little bit. Dirty Wap for five. Good to see Nick.

I'm proud to be a knicker Can't of the Swiss for five now. That's pisses me off trucks me Oklavich for two would you wear ladies hosiery as a bit veto ha ha Depends on the bit coo for five guys no idea what that means for five from kuf Nick You got any Aaron gosh you can tease for us. I need a hit. Keep me going until HACK-a-mania! By the way, don't forget the meat fridge. Yeah, he fucked a dog. Aaron Imhold fucked a dog.

He texted me about it. On Molly. Yeah, he's been texting you a bunch on Molly about all the dogs. He was like, the first time I ever fucked a dog and he told me about it. I don't understand. All I hear about is that the toes been winning Winning all day. We're not winning. Congrats. He's getting the donos. He's got that. Does he have a co-host? The dog was named Donos. Donos. Yeah. It's a St. Bernard named Donos I'm fucked to stay warm. I'm dick deep in Donos and everyone's like, oh, he's just excited about all the donations

He didn't know it was a Eryon the vegetarian for five only people married to the person they lost their virginity to who was also a virgin and never had fun Experimenting before marriage can talk crap. Yeah, I agree. Yeah That's you G- for 20 make fun of yellow flash force for Kato to watch Beyond the narrative 2 by Eric July. Oh, that's you. G-dash for 20, make fun of Yellow Flash, force Rikado to watch Beyond the Narrative 2 by Eric Jilai. Oh, I can't force this man to watch that nightmare. You think this comic's gonna be good? Yellow Flash? You don't think this comic's gonna be good? No, I don't think so.

Aw. Did he ever try to send it to you or anything? No, no, no. He hadn't, I don't think he'd even started working on it when he like, he got really pissed off at me for something that I didn't do to him at all. So. Cause he's fucking a pig. That's why.

Cause he brings, he brought a sheep, I heard the story that Yellow Flash brought a sheep home to his wife. And he said, and he said this is a pig I'm fucking and his cop wife said that's a sheep and he goes I was talking to the sheep. Yellow Flash said that! a sheep and he goes I was talking to the sheep Yellow flash said that can you believe that Melanie Mack told me that Melanie Mack told me Melanie Mack told that Clinic there's been a lot of goss. She prayed about it later though. This was fine Yeah, she she was at church. We go to the same church There's a lot of behind-the the scenes going on with some of those guys. And she said Yellow Flask brought a sheep home to his wife, who's a cop.

I don't want to go too much into drama, but is there anyone who's really wronged you, you feel? Like worse than anyone else? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Yeah. The Nate the Lawyer shit is pretty wild, because it seems like you were really nice to that guy. That came out of fucking nowhere. I was like, I would never promise to give people money. I would never promise to pay someone to be on my show. Like Stanley Livingston shit. And I hate to say it, whenever I saw Nate the Lawyer, I said, that's that guy who hangs

out with Reketa. Like you made him as far as I know. I didn't know who the fuck I was before you. Nate's really good at making short video content. He hits these subjects, they get four or five million views. He's awesome at it. Yeah. And like, so he's-

So what does he need your fucking money for? I don't know. OK. And it was like, you know I would never pay you. Like, look at me, I'm Jewish. Look at the nose on this motherfucker. It's not going to happen. Yeah.

So that was like the most offensive part. It's like the idea that I would even suggest paying some like I did say I Plan on giving you guys some gifts or whatever and I did go to their streams and gave them super chats Which seems great to just get a couple hundred bucks for hanging out and talking shit It was a couple hundred bucks that I wouldn't give anybody else like I'm not gonna come How much is super chat this fucking show? Well every once in a while I made like five bucks But yeah, we're not getting to that rick a to love

Yeah, no fuck you guys is there anybody who broke ties that it like really hurts really like of all the people Yeah, a ton of them. Yeah, yeah, that's our Yeah, especially people have any of them reached out and been like try to mend fences been like nobody fuck you over been like try to mend fences and been like nobody. EBS didn't fuck you over. I guess. Ethan Van Skyberle. I don't think so. No, EBS has been very nice to you.

There are a couple of people who've been with- EBS was too nice to you though, where he said, some of the stuff he was saying where it's like, oh, you know, sometimes in a household, you know, dad and mom are fucking up and the kids got to take care of the other kids. It doesn't really matter. And I'm like, don't say that. Funny. Fucking up and the kids gotta take care of the other kids. It doesn't really matter and I'm like don't say that Funny sometimes your sometimes your parents are degenerate drug addicts, but it's normal. It's normal I'm like EBS is not a good defense of Cronkita

There are a bunch of people who have been like still good friends But have been like dude you really fucked up here here and here and you need to fix these things like well Yeah, I got it. Okay. Thanks like I already know like I figured that out when I got a- hey drugs are bad cool thanks man I've literally never heard that before wow but I said this somewhere else was like once the government takes your kids like the government's the problem the other people talking to you and being like oh you fucked it's like go away the government has my kids they took my children I'm not worried about what you say anymore. So I helped a lot of people.

I never really asked them for stuff. When they would shit on me, I'd just be like, I don't care. Do your show. And those people stabbed me in the back. Almost all of them knew I was doing cocaine. I offered it to some of them. Some of them took it. I hate to say it, the idea of a lawyer taking cocaine

like just feels right to me. I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, I've never heard of this. They're like, I can't believe he was doing this. A guy who like, entertainer is doing cocaine and he's a lawyer? I can't believe it. Wait a minute. So it's like, and then they go,

man, I love Robert Downey Jr. in that new fucking Iron Man movie. And you go, oh, shut the fuck, come on! It's like, there's a shitload of things that that happened. It's like Guys like you don't even have to be performative about this like I know I fucked up guys fuck off like just I don't get it was the sanctimonious sanctimonious tweets were the worst of all these guys being like yeah I just really want to, I hope Nick finds God

and finds himself. Or how about the guy. You guys are lucky we can't say the F slur. You know, he was so good, he was so good. How about the lawyer. He was so good. And now he's not good. Who makes a public proclamation that he will represent me for free.

Has a phone call with me. Is that that fat ass? No, a DUI guy. Oh, okay. He has a phone call with me, considering like, he's like, look. I'll represent you. he's like look I'll represent you hear the terms I'll represent you if you just cover some of these expenses and Fly out even if I'm not representing you alone like it can be part of your team because he's not licensed in Minnesota and stuff Like that right so we have this conversation in contemplation of me retaining him

And then he makes a public proclamation that his offer to represent me is rescinded. And I'm like, Because of the test. And I'm like, Holy fuck that is wildly unethical. Yeah, wait, did he publicly say I want to represent you ahead of time? Yes! Yeah. So he's like, dude that's like fucked.

Oh never mind, I'm gonna help you actually. It's like, dude that's- I don't know about this test of this one little girl. And for the record, he knows nothing about it. He never contacted me about the test. He never did anything. So he knows nothing about it at all. He just contacted me to solicit male prostitution.

He said, I'll suck your cock. It's weird how these guys come to you in confidence. They do. What was his name? The DUI lawyer. He said, I'll suck you from the back, I'll dig my nose in your asshole. I'm not surprised. He sent me a message and he said, hey do you actually know where to get CP? And I said no. He said I love child pornography. Can I get some? I was like man

that's just a bit that we do. This is a comedy show that we're doing here. He's a weird freak. So when you say, oh I'm going to represent this guy for free and then you make a public proclamation in reaction to something that you don't know about you're like I'm not gonna represent this guy it makes it look like it's valid and he has no idea about it. He's not a part of it. It's like dude that's like that's an ethics violation like what the fuck are you doing? Yeah. But I don't know man. It's like that Superman comment where he goes I'm gonna save this guy from a burning building and then he goes never mind that guy's a pedophile and you go oh Superman he can't say that. I'm four. Yeah. Anyway. Jake Glover for Ten. Biggest

problem in the universe is apps that could change around for no discernible reason just so someone can pretend to be working at Spotify who keeps sending us emails trying to get our show on their platform and then when I say well how much money are you offering they go none. Unpleasant for five hey Nick do you go to court trust like that? No I'm usually wearing an orange jumpsuit. It's a good look. Arianne the vegetarian for two I have six kids and struggle with daydreaming about jail. Oglovitch for five here biggest problem we don't condone road sodas but let's not pretend we haven't all played slalom on suds with the road meridian once or twice It's cool. Charles Baker for five. Hey Vito, talk about Chrissy Mair's hooters like Mickey Rooney

Oh, she got a good hoot-arsh! I did a fucked up version there. Bob Twiliger for ten. I got to meet both you guys in Philly You signed my Andrew Brancaca book don't ever let the Bastards get to you dick what programming language you use do you like either Python or C sharp? Oh Js sucks Python is C sharp fuck fuck you Lawrence to veiny for five the left camp actually, but wait. What are you using? Lawrence Devaney for five. The left can't meme. Rust actually. But wait, what are you using? Rust and Nude. Okay. The left can't meme. The right can't make decent coffee. I will not have it if it's not served by a tattooed rainbow-haired barista. It's true.

The left makes good coffee because you know coffee's gay and they make it good and gay. Clay Early for two. Super Chat drink by Ryan Ogden for two. Nick is the best kiwi stopper poop Street steak for two para ser justos does it count in other languages I don't know what that means Jack Rockstar for five didn't you guys do toe radio thing of super chat 250 will watch the Eric July vid I've been Took this into doing that Good idea suck a dick fuck you we put it out You know pineapple man for two best episode in a long time shout out to Schmidt has mad for two wings and veto are similar uncouth The bastards mains truck cabbie Davis for two there was a Swiss Miss Oktoberfest girl That's what I was talking about the Oktoberfest girl

She was not whatever little girl popped into your head that you immediately searched out. I was thinking of the Oktoberfest girl. Not whatever little girl popped into your head that you immediately searched out. I was thinking of the Oktoberfest girl Case Wendell for five says she's Swiss misses now. She was kidnapped by migrant groomers Blanko boy for five. RE Chrissy Mare, I'm a 40 year old virgin and somehow veto still sounded like a bigger incel last week I enjoy talking about Milk tits. You do sound like an inc install when you're talking to girls. Yeah, that's fine. Girls are gross. LJ Claverino for two, Big Sproutman, Eric, July part two, Electra Boogaloo, could be a bonus episode coming to you soon. Willie Dingus for five. Nick took his kids to the water park now that the winter wonderland is closed. Gave no more

snow skiing for the recaded children. Gave it $4,000 for seven dollars Vito's morning routine one wake up to take a huge shit three get out of bed for jerk it to mrs. Buttersworth Energy king for two mission Nick mon come back to the island the Jerry and coke for a big $20 on the board Thank you. Love you dicks andS, but especially my favorite internet lawyer. Glad to see you back on my favorite show, Nick. Malarkey for five, hey Nick, can't wait for you to return to the top of the Law 2 pile. I would have given more, but I just learned

I'm gonna need to buy a new car. Don't make excuses for me to give some more money. A new car is fucking 20 bucks, you cheap piece of shit. Fuck you. Renox is- It's a Camry versus a Corolla, man. Renox is for five. Vito thinks being an idea guy is something worth mentioning. Sure, Terdry for two. Classic Vito wearing his Nagruder shirt today.

Yes, I'm wearing my Nagruder shirt because I'm reversed in the camera. Point zero two four for two. Cockroach on the brain. Cat scan of your head now. Ogluvich for two. nobody can figure out John dishwashers John dishwashers a good name everyone agrees Zeta quickself five guys are for the future and vetoes films are finally set to premiere in 2084 all hail veto the John I think veto is can oh Tiki the mighty for five I think veto is confusing Swiss miss with the Sun made raisin yeah I think so too almost thought we had another Mandela effect on our hands. Not a pedophile.

Not a pedophile. I didn't even know there was a little Swiss Miss girl. I've never seen that in my life. The squid for 20, Vito MLK Jr. had dreams too, but that doesn't mean they're good ideas. I agree they're not good ideas. Except for John Dishwater, which is the John Dish washer. It's a practice lawful relations, but when you open it, it chucks sticks in your ass. Nobody wants that. My Comfort Tube, kickstart this condom idea see if there's interest managed truck Cappy Davis for two John disher Catch phrase dishing out his dishes out justice man ray for 20 veto could sit single-handedly solve anti-semitism By making this consent dom convo go viral and then revealing he's not Jewish There's grifters out there who aren't Jewish folks. They're mostly Italian.

Pizzarhoid gaming guides for two. Question for Peggy. Is comic still coming by the end of March as promised? No, don't answer that because they didn't spend enough money to get the answer. The Gentleman Sausage for five. Welcome back to the world of the living nose man. May AA Ron spend the rest of his days in a chair in the corner for his crimes. Flirkin the Blurk for two, John Dishwasher and the evil Danny Clock Cleaner. Wings 2070 for two, veto, sissification inbound, paging Dr. Don Wario. Why am I, why do we gotta page Dr. Don Wario? Are you afraid of him? Are you afraid of Dr. Don Wario. Why do we gotta page Dr. Don Wario? Are you afraid of him? Frank Hassel has hassled men into jail.

You got fucked by Riley. Frank Hassel would send you into another dimension. I did not get fucked by Riley. Okay. Denying it very hard there. Colonel Jay to the sheriff for five. What does rackets think about fat dudes who drink six liters of diet soda a day? Everyone I know who drinks diet soda is fat except for two people.

Noel was saying that he drinks six liters of diet soda every day. Six liters? That does not surprise me at all. Holy shit, that's a lot of fucking soda, how? That's a lot of soda. I don't drink that much soda. He said he would drink one and shove the other one up his ass and shake it up. I drink these little lemon lime primes with only 10 calories, but I drink like maybe two of these a day.

Then I drink some water. Eric, you like you see for ten, Vito, letting the femboy move in would solve so many of your problems. You get your house clean, cook for you and keep your lonely ass company. The femboy doesn't want to pay rent. That's the bigger issue. Kyle for five. Cook for you and keep your lonely ass company. The femboy doesn't want to pay rent. That's the bigger issue. Kyle for five. If the femboy said, and I'll give you $7.50 a month, I'd go maybe.

You want money. You want money to get fucked. I don't want to give... I'm not giving a femboy... Look, fucking your ass might be a good time, but I'm not giving you a free room and board. Why not? It's a lot of... It's like you're married. How often do I want to fuck the femboy's ass, really? I don't know, you're the clear... Pretty often, I'm guessing. It's a lot. It's like you're married. How often do I want to fuck the funboys ass really? I don't know you're the pretty I'm guessing it's a whole thing

Can't do it every day you break them and I need to space it out Kyle for five Nick Cosign being friends with Ethan Ralph and support me being friends with Ethan Ethan I don't care who's friends with him And I'm not cos-signing shit. Death Trout for five, Vito coulda gotten the Columbia Mattress Girl sell consent Dom. I'm like 15 minutes behind.

Coulda got her, that's true, I think it was the consent, I think the Mattress Girl was around hot at the time. Yeah, Eddie Aferts. I was like, Mattress Girl's making money selling her period blood smeared on a dirty mattress. I'm pretty sure a little form. I can make a little taste of that. I can make a little something here,

I can get a taste of that. 88 for two, Nick is much of a joke as Aaron Himmelt is. That's terrible. Aspartame brain tumor for two. Remember the house always wins. Missouri for two, Vito I love how open your shirt hides. The point of pounds. The point of pounds right there.

Oklovich for two, you can definitely find DZ on most narcotics. Oklovich for two, these nuts. Oklovic for Tootie's nuts. Clipsama for two, Nick has reunited with his pod now. Oh, yeah. Wasn't that crazy? That's so... He's your pod now. What do you mean?

Man, it's just so insulting that you chose to be this black on a stream with me. He did give me that great clip, though, where he called me a white bread ass nigga. He called you a fake ass internet lawyer right? That Eric Jeline. I'm quoting a black man it's fine. My god. It's not fine.

My god. He used the A right? He used the A right? He's quoting rap lyrics. Ah fat guy. Why does he get to call us it? Called you the unword. Horrible.

I know. It's my word. I'm at work just popped in to say no shoes, Fido, camera for two, Nick, bathrooms need doors. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Nick. Well, he digs for 10.

I'm imagining a bowl of the consentums at a college freshman year kickoff and all the jocks grab the ones with the condoms in it and throw the old form ones on the ground and the nerds are scooping them up. It would be bad if you had like a sex party and the guy goes to grab one and he thinks it's a condom and then he gets in the bedroom and goes, what is that, a condom? He's like, I guess I'm just raw dogging this bitch then. Wait, the packages aren't together? They'd be clued together, but like, you know, it could become detached. Everything about this idea is awful. I agree! That was why it's a problem! Dream ideas are bad!

Except for Johnny Dishwasher, the greatest hero America has ever seen. And when Johnny Dishwasher comes in the room, you know the heads are gonna turn. Brian Ogden for two, be good Nick, I believe in you. Doug Grumps for five, I missed you Nick, or I come buckets for five. $3,000 for rehab, my rehab Hacienda was 30k. I think you could, I think you'd get like way more for rehab. Hacienda was 30k. I think you could, I think you get like way more for rehab. Fun fact, I broke two years of sobriety watching Nick's and Drex's New Year's 2021 stream. Happy to help. Brian Ogden for two. Nick deserves our support. MC Lightsaber for five. Drugs

are fun. Lawrence Savani for two. Nick, whatever happened to Ron Toye? I don't know. Joseph Fazio for five. You mean President George Sears, AKA solidest snake of the Los Enfant-terrible project? Yes. Sport Nugget for two. I understood that reference. When will Nick join EVS on Trashcast? I don't know.

Sometime, I'm guessing. Anytime soon. You gotta hammer him for licking urinals. Wait, what? EVS. I have not heard this. You gotta get him in there and hammer him right away. Licking urinals?

Disgusting. Ellen the Chat for two. Ellen the Chat heard this. You gotta get in there and hammer him right away. Wicking urinals. Ellen the Chad for two. Ellen the Chad. Okay. For two, Truxme, that pisses me off. Mashauff shirt, please. Oh, he wants a that pisses me off with a Truxme shirt. You want a double shirt. Not for two dollars. Big Boss for two. DSP

is half the sector co-hosting his show Howe. I don't know. Tremendous Fatigue for two, thank you. Jacob for ten, Nicky Poo is back in the studio, we are so back. Love you guys, I started watching both Nick and Vito separately, it's so good to see you two together. Massive love to Dick, Vito, Nick and Johnny. Cryxis for two, that DUI guy is a big mouth fan, he was always sus. Hey is Johnny coming to Hackamania? No. You should see if he wants to come. I know he's always busy. Dalton for five Vito add the consent dumb to your lunchbox backers

might as well. Big Boss for two. Any time for Warhammer Nick. Books etc. I have not been reading anything. Anime Hole Rapist for fifty dollars says money thank you. And Mike Cutts for five just got here Nick are you going to Hackamania? Yes, I will be there Thursday and Friday. Assuming the court says okay. For the big VIP dinner. What's the game where we smash on the toy? Who's booty?

A man who tweets about little boys. You're bad at this. And what's in the box? You know you want it. Get on the scaler. Just get on the scaler, I'll smash it. You gotta wear in the box? You know you want it. Just get on the scaler, I'll smash it. You gotta wear the fucking headphones, you can hear the song. You ruin the whole fucking bed. BOOTY! VEEDO'S BOOTY! You're completely off the beat.

VEEDO'S BOOTY! What's it gonna be? Well, Nick, are you familiar with this fantastic bit here? Hey! What's it gonna be? Sounds lovely. What's it gonna be? Well, Nick, are you familiar with this fantastic bit here? If he doesn't weigh himself, he's not losing any weight. If he doesn't weigh himself, then we smash his toys. Give him the hammer. Oh, this is the thing where you have to be less fat.

This is good. Yeah, this is the thing where I have to be less fat. I say, in celebration of our great friend Nick Ricada smashing his way out of prison to be here with us. Why don't we too smash this glorious toy? Okay. Okay, no, don't smash that though. Wait, what is that?

Oh no, these are cool. Hold on, let me keep one of these. No, no, no. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Just this one. Wrong, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I think right I don't want to smash any of them. We can make fun of you for not trying hard enough These are nice neo geo little pads. They're nice Just don't smash it too much. Oh, that's the Terry Bogard one. Oh Yeah, you fucked up

Cuz you wouldn't want to go put it back. It is it's right there They're all there do we take it out of the box and smash it? No, just smash it in the box. They're all all the boxes are they now. There's one missing. I don't know what you're talking about There's one missing. It's under his fat disgusting foot Nothing's missing All right now they're all on the table Why do you even care about this? Why do you fucking chainsaw? You're gonna destroy that fucking yeah, Nick get in there Why do you have a fucking chainsaw? Because it's better. AHHHHH AHHHHH AHHHHH AHHHHH AHHHHH

You're gonna destroy that fucking- AHHHHH Nick get in there. Oh not that one, that's a good one. No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no, no, no, it's fine No, I don't know they're all destroyed okay There I'm gonna knock over your dry know you killed me this one you really like so I'm gonna hit it harder This is a good bit you got it it's done cuz you. Because you didn't lose weight. Because you were drinking sugary stuff. That's why this is happening. I understand why it's happening. That's why this is happening. Because you're not- Lose the weight you fat piece of shit!

Because you're not losing weight. You better be a person! We gotta clean this table. This is more embarrassing losing weight and Be more responsible with your eating habits. I'll try my best well. You're not trying hard enough I'm gonna weigh a hundred pounds by hackamania there you go guys. We got a great show. Thanks for coming by You had to this guy 100% you had to do this drug addict 100% You had to bring in Uncle Nick to destroy all my Christmas presents, is that what you're saying? Yeah, you have fucked up.

Well, we got a couple more super chats here from Chrissy Mare for 1999. Wow, this show has really gone downhill. Yes, Chrissy, he is still barefoot. I'm gonna chop those toes off. Thank you, Chrissy Mare. You're gonna try to pull your controller out of this. I bet. I don't need...

We gotta... What's this thing? No. No. No. Now try it. Fuck you. They're all...

Stop! I got it! Alright? I'm back! What do you want? You have to lose weight. We want you to be skinny! You gotta lose weight.

Like a human! I'm working on it. You're not trying very hard. Alright, well here's the list of Patreon subscribers which is completely cropped out and incorrect. Thanks to everybody for coming by! We will be back soon. A new bonus episode comes soon to patreon.com slash biggest problem. Vote on all the problems of the biggest problem show and check out our good friend Nick Ricada on YouTube, Twitter and all other exciting platforms.

We love you. Don't buy the Quartering's Gay Coffee and Eric July is... Review Bomb The Quartering's Coffee. Yeah, go nuts. Say it tastes like a dick. Tastes like a cum. Say it tastes like a cum.

Tastes like you raped a horse and then you drank your own cum out of its ass. Say that. Fantastic. Cause the liberals are out to get you! Ayayayay sure all your favorite internet retards complain about this show and all the jokes we made. Oh, I can't believe they would joke about that. Nick really needs to get away from those guys. Tell Muda Hart to stop shitting in the street.

You said that. I didn't say it. You said it. You said it. You said it! You said it! He black-faced me! He black-faced me! I can't believe you said that. Oh my god. I can't wait till that guy...

He's gonna get his buddy Cash Patel together and go, Oh no no no no no no! Stop! Cut it! Stop! I can't wait till that guy gets married so he can light his wife on fire. And the fuck you see! I love a star! Thank you to all our supporters.