The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 111

Episode Date: October 21, 2023

I need a funny name for this. It just doesn't make any sense. It's people freaking out. I don't fucking know. I don't know, man. Now the show's starting, I don't have a fucking clever name for my problem. We'll come up with it during the show. Do you have a rhyme? Ah! Yes, that I actually do have. Okay. From Matt Piedi.

Maybe I should leave this up here for good. It looks pretty cool. Why do I keep breathing into the mic? I don't know. You love breathing into the mic. I'm trying not to. It's like below my nostrils. But it's like when you're sitting there, you get into this rhythm of like... It's supposed to be good to breathe through your nose.

I don't think I do it. I don't know. Okay. Should I hit the fade? Yeah. There it is. It's the fade. Okay. Should I hit the fade? Yeah. There it is. Fade. Wow.

Does that look cool? Well, I don't know if cool is the word. There's you. What do you think about this? Why are you showing me first? Because I forgot which way I was going from. How about right there? Don't put that there.

Come on. What do you mean? Why? We don't need that on the screen the whole fucking show. I'm not going to put it there the whole show, but don't you think it looks cool? I don't know if cool is it. This is cool, man. This is hardcore.

I'm not upset by it. I'm not as upset by it as other people seem to be. Are you even a little bit upset by it? No. Did you think it was hilarious like I did? I laughed. I was like, oh. I was like, what did you think was gonna happen?

You're feuding with a bunch of internet morons and you go, my comic character's based on my great grandpa. Here's his grave. I'm getting sued by a church and they're fake Christians and they're bad and actually it's because of my dead great great great great grandfather, the child of a slave. Yeah. That's actually, so I'm digging his body up and using it as a shield against the fucking Christian ministry.

Okay, it's the same situation. Here's why it's funny. It's because it's so innocuous and stupid. She's like, oh, your great-grandfather's grave? Well, I'm going to go and take a picture

with a bunny rabbit and a turtle. What do you mean innocuous? That's disrespect of that. It's often incalculable. Did I use innocuous incorrectly? I mean, I think you meant... Inoffensive.

No, you meant... It's horrifying what happened. Yeah, not innocuous. Not innocuous at all. I mean, it's literally racist intimidation. Can you believe it? An entire message board is saying how we are true maniacs for... They would never do...

Oh, I have null... We would never do anything on this level. Don't you guys have porn of a mentally challenged guy? Isn't that the whole reason your site exists? No, but you don't understand. Going to a public cemetery and taking a selfie and then working yourself into a frenzy, trying to convince yourself that he peed on the grave.

Well, I mean, look at this photo. I mean, look at this photo. It's like he didn't pee on the grave, guys. Oh, wow. There's no reason for him to do that. Are we there? Are we up? Yeah, we're up.

We're up. Let's give a little cup check there. Are you as jazzed as I am? I was going to say, as always, the reason it's funny is the complete overreaction. To like, just go, ah, you guys, you little scams. Wait a minute. You little scoundrels. Are you saying this stuff isn't funny unless people overreact to it?

What do you mean? That's not how comedy works. Comedy is you do something and everybody is aware of it and everybody's in on the joke. Nobody's emotions are tested or teased or surprised at all. Right. People sit stone-faced

in the audience. We never once implemented any sort of laugh track into our entertainment in order to share the reaction to a piece of comedic material and encourage other people to also react to it. So you did think it was hilarious?

The grave thing? Here's the thing. It's not on its face. It's not hilarious. It's ah, hey, that's a thing a guy did, right? He put a curse on. No, he didn't, though. He just went and he took a picture. And now I have people telling me, well, this is basically considered a federal hate crime,

what's happened here. This is a federal hate crime. He could be arrested. It's so important that they let everybody know it's a hate crime. If this was Texas, you could legally kill him, as we know. It's hilarious. Thankfully, Eric July's family is now running 24-7 security. They got Taylor Swift's bodyguard, that IDF guy.

When he tweeted, oh, don't worry, we have family and friends keeping... Kinfolk! Yeah, kinfolk keeping vigil over the grave. I didn't get... Oh, did you say... Oh, did you say kinfolk? Did you say kinfolk? Hey, you know, I heard a...

I heard a nice white boy came to my... came to my tombstone. See, this is racist intimidation. Why is it racist intimidation what I'm doing? I'm not what you're doing. Never in my wildest dreams would I imagine a young white man would come to my, never when I was a child of a slave in the Reconstructionary South

did I ever imagine that a young white man would come take a picture of my tombstone. Isn't that crazy? Took a picture, a photograph in your time must have cost a lot of money. Yes, of course. It's a rare piece of technology. Took a photo. Must have spent all kind of time and money just below me. It's very exciting to get your picture taken.

Gonna be tickled more people. And you must be excited now that you have friends and kinfolk surrounding your grave on a 24-hour surveillance to make sure. They got some Pokemon over my grave. A Geodude, I believe it was called. They should make Isomnox's grave into an official Pokemon site for Pokemon Go. I always wanted to make a video game. Yeah, that's a whole other topic.

I want to get on that ASAP. Well, your great-great-grandson also wants to make a video game, and we discussed the upcoming Isom video game on our newest bonus episode, The Biggest Problem in Halloween. Yeah. That'll be available by the time you are listening to this, probably on Monday. I'm going to get that shit up. Patreon.com. It might be available tonight.

Patreon.com slash biggest problem. All right. Backed up by slash biggest problem. Did I play the correct theme song for the bonus episode? Yeah, you did. Okay. Because I screamed over it like a moron Alright are you ready to do this episode now?

Yes Okay let's go Thank god Thank fucking christ Stop with the racist intimidation Biggest Problem In the

Universe Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe The only show that ranks every problem in the universe. Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe. The only show that ranks every problem in the universe from neighbors being bad to dead kids making people sad. I'm your host Dick Madden. Joining me is Vito Giswaldi. Hi, Dick. What's up, buddy? How you doing?

Doing good. You know what? I just realized I have a clock here that I could watch to time that intro better. Well. Because I like to finish talking the intro when it fades out. I like the comments that are like 110 episodes and they still have not figured out the audio. But I think we got it now. Do they mean the audio in general or the theme song audio? Sometimes, no. Occasionally we screw up things.

Guys, we do a great show here. Yeah, so check out the bonus episode. Biggest problem in Halloween. The eye-song part's gotta be... The rip-a-verse part's gotta be the best part of that bonus episode. We gotta go back and watch the rest of that video. We'll have to do it next week. We could do it on this show.

Because here's the thing with Eric. He says so many stupid things. Yeah. Like, I just want to watch everything he puts out and make fun of it. It's so dumb and bad. And nobody is making fun of anything he does. Like, everybody else in comics and, like, you know, like, talking about pop culture shit.

Which is, some of them, it's their job to talk about comics and pop culture and make fun of it. They're vicious with everything, except everything he does is dumb and funny. And they say nothing. Or they say, what a genius. What a genius. And you're like, no, he's like a child. He's like, literally the more things, here's the other.

He's sued by a church. He's a bad guy. Okay. Well, that's like a child. He's like, literally, the more things. He's getting sued by a church. He's a bad guy. Okay. Well, that's part of it. The more stuff he says, because at first I was like, well, he's just like a regular dumb guy. And now I'm like, oh, man, he's like an ultra not self-aware dumb guy. Because anytime he's done anything dumb, everyone around him has been like, well, you're a genius. You're a once in a lifetime talent.

anything dumb. Everyone around him has been like, well, you're a genius. You're a once-in-a-lifetime talent. I'm like, no, he's like an autistic kid with on-devian art coming up with endless superhero characters without any connecting plot threads. Total dog shit. I'm going to make... You know that guy...

Who's the guy who kept making the endless runner game that was just about how high you could jump? I don't remember that. He kept making a game? He was this super autistic guy. Someone in the chat's going to get it. All right. And all it was was like, he really liked the idea of video games

where you could jump high and he would play terrible games like Bubsy 3D just because it had a glitch where you could jump out of bounds. That's all he cared about was jumping really high. Hey, man, jumping high is cool.

It is cool. Marvel vs. Capcom where you could shoot up the whole thing. I was like, what the fuck, man? Whoa, no way. No one's ever going to hit me up here. I wish I could do this in real life. And I realized Eric is just like that. It's that guy.

It's that I don't really care about making a good game or a good comic book. Everybody got themselves way overextended in all this. Yeah. Kissing his ass, letting this shit slide. And now some of them are, well, here's the other thing is that- That's the lesson. So many of them I think felt, okay. I mean, not to like spill tea or whatever.

But I would have guys in my DMs going, listen, I watched Dick's critique. What do you think of my cock? And by the way, it seems pretty reasonable. I wish Eric would listen to some of what he said.

I've tried to give him this advice. He won't listen to me. And also, I can't really talk shit about him because, you know, I'm trying to make comics and I don't want to stir up waves. Okay.

And now I guess we've emboldened people to finally... Again, the emperor is wearing no clothes. The emperor is wearing no clothes. One kid comes out of the crowd and goes, Hey, look at that naked motherfucker. And that's it. And then it's just...

The dreaded N-word, naked. Yeah, that's the N-word that everyone is trying to avoid. Now we're on your grave. It is the guy. Tap dancing on your grave. P.K. Rockin' S is the guy who talked about dabbing pizza with paper towels. That was one of his things.

Look at this beautiful, beautiful man. See, now you've blocked me on Twitter because you're an asshole and you shouldn't block me. Maybe I'll unblock you this week. Well, maybe you should. I posted a thing. These guys also don't realize they've become the thing they hate. Racist. The woke people.

Yeah. They're blaming everything on racism. That's racist. Yeah. I had a guy who was commenting. Chrissy Meyer went on the Anthony Acumia show and talked about the ISOM lawsuit. We came up briefly. It was mostly them talking about Nick Riccata.

Okay. I saw him lawsuit. We came up briefly. It was mostly them talking about Nick Ricada. Okay. But one of the comments was, don't they understand that Eric is trying to build institutional wealth as a historically disadvantaged black man? And I went, you're the social justice warrior now. You're the guy telling me we have to buy his comic because he's trying to generate, because

black people have been kept down historically and he's trying to build institutional wealth. I don't have to read it, do I? Yeah. Do I have to read it because he's trying to generate... Because black people have been kept down historically and he's trying to build institutional wealth. I don't have to read it, do I? Yeah. Do I have to read it because he's black too? They're saying the reason that we hate it is because we want to stop black men from getting ahead in life. Well, um...

Which is only half true. Yeah, that's... Exactly. I gave a lot of tips for the next black guy to come in and not fuck up this badly Okay I kind of forgot how we did the show I don't know why

Last week, bad neighbors The neighbors are getting worse Okay No The other neighbors are Which neighbors was I talking about? I don't know Which neighbors blew up talking about? I don't know. All I know is one of the neighbors.

Which neighbors blew up a hospital? Well, that's the question, isn't it? One neighbor says that his bottle rocket went over the other fence. The other guy goes, you followed your own fucking bottle rocket. So. You know, I love it. It's been a hell of a Fourth of July for those two neighbors. Yeah.

I love the next day how everyone went, Oh, it wasn't even a hospital. It was just a parking lot. Don't you guys feel dumb? You know hospitals have parking lots, right? Either way, something happened. Yeah, but who blew up the parking lot then? Because there was a bunch of people's cars there. Yeah.

I mean... I think something happened. Okay. Pimples on cars there. Yeah. I mean. I think something happened. Okay. Pimples on your nose. Second. Second. Jesus Christ. Come on.

Game stop. Third. Third. Counting dead kids at the very bottom. Everybody likes counting those kids. Yeah, they love it

because you. Can't do anything because a kid there might be a dead kid. Kid might die. I don't care. But then remember when. Same reason we can't have Four Loko. That's what I should have brought up. We can't have Four Loko. We can't have flavored vapes. Yeah. Dead kid. That's what I should have talked about. You could have also talked about when, how I said you don't need the

government regulating stuff. And you said your first, the first thing you say every time is, well, then you could sell poison to kids. Yeah, I'm very much going against myself. I mean look, you could have common sense things. You remember those buckyballs you're not allowed to buy anymore? Those little magnets that were fun? Oh yeah, because people

kept eating them. Oh, supposedly but it's like kids weren't really eating them. It's just like the idea that kids could eat them. That's it like the idea that kids could eat them. That's it. Yeah. If a kid could eat something, you can't sell it. Yeah.

If it's like something that would be hard to get out of a kid. You as an adult should be able to buy things without any what if a kid ate it. What if a kid stabbed himself in the eye with it? Yeah, you are, that's what I'm saying. No regulation at all. Sure. But then you're saying you could sell poison to kids. I think poison is the one thing where I could...

Why would that... I take a firm stance against poison. Why would a kid eat a fucking... Why would a kid eat poison? Why would people... What is stopping people from buying poison and giving it to kids right now? The government? The point is that you can't sell poison shaped as popsicles and call it hyper sugar treat,

you know? Why would someone... First of all, yes, they can. No, they can't. It's just a crime. They absolutely can go make. They can commit a crime, yes. Well, then how are you stopping it? By making it, by regulating shit.

I'm just saying. Like, you think he's going to do it as a business? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, exactly. Like, you would start. He'll just never going to be arrested or killed? You would, you could be an ice cream man, start an ice cream truck, and be like,

I'm selling super ice cream. And as long as the kid doesn't ask you what's in it, you can just be like, oh, it's super ice cream. And then the kid dies. I didn't tell you to eat it, idiot. It's for a drain cleaner. Well, and then people are probably really pissed at you. They'll kill you.

Have you seen neighborhoods where guys are walking around with trailers of popsicles? It's kind of a quasi-lawless situation that they got going on down there. It is quasi-lawless. I guess the ice cream man could just kill kids if he wanted. Well, he couldn't, though. He's a little bit... I think we need a little bit of the food and drug administration. God damn you.

Just a little bit. Okay. Machine Shop Billy says the blaxploitation music for Eric's grandpa should be southern blues guitar. We've had a lot of suggestions for... Let's see. Yeah. Southern blues riffs. Let's see if that works.

The key of A. No, I need like Robert Johnson Yeah Robert Johnson Why don't you put Classic Spirituals

Of a certain No it's gotta be like You can't put the I can't say the What type of spirituals Kind of spiritual Let's see Oh

Oh yeah Oh yeah Mmhmm Sit me down Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. Sippin' down. I'm gonna put the sun on it. All right, all right, all right. Excellent work. Friend on lines in garlic says,

I woke up with a pimple on my nose. Fucking hurts. Flirt up. John Veal says, Super killer needs to stop Hamas. He defeated George Floyd. Can he stop the killing of kids Hamas. He defeated George Floyd. Can he stop the killing of kids? He did not defeat George Floyd.

That's not canon. And I keep getting shit for that. Well, you should. Why? I didn't draw it. You created an environment where it's tolerable or accepted. Wow. Encouraged.

Yeah, I guess I didn't come down on it hard enough. Yeah. I told you I got an insane phone call about that image, right? I don't know. Did you? Yeah. Did you tell me that? I told you privately, but I haven't talked about it on the show.

Oh, okay. But basically a former friend went, and this was somebody I'd already had a falling out with because apparently I'm alt right now or whatever, but they were on Twitter and for some reason somebody had retweeted this and said, look at what these boys are doing to this poor black man. And they went, I know that. I know that gentleman. And they called me up and they went, well, what are you doing? You're drawing comics about killing black men now? And I went, listen. First of all, the fentanyl killed him. Shut up. I didn't say that.

I really was like, I knew this was going to be hard to explain to somebody, and you're the person who it's going to be hard to explain to. And they didn't buy it. They did not buy my explanation where I went. That somebody else did it? Well, I went. What do they look like? Let's draw a picture of them doing it. Yeah.

I went, well, the reason that it exists is specifically to upset me because of how much I find the imagery distasteful as a liberal person who does not like the killing of George Floyd. And they're like, I still think you're racist. I'm like, well, what are you going to do? Well, yeah, because it was a good test. Like, let's see what Vito values more, his liberal politics or his sense of humor. And the sense of humor won.

I get why it's funny. It's funny because it hurts me inside. Okay? I get it. And I've rewatched the clip of when we first brought it up on the show. You were laughing, dying. I was laughing. I was dying.

Yeah. I was like, please. This is the funniest thing I've ever seen. I was like, please take it off the screen. I can't deal with this. Okay? Because that's how effective it was. But now you've convinced this.

So maybe he would team up. You say Super Killer would team up with Hamas, you're saying. No, I didn't say that. He would be in a paraglider, maybe, in a music festival. It's not a thing. Because, like, the ultimate hero is, like, love. Superkiller supports the state of Israel. That is canon.

But what if, it's a multiverse, right? Maybe Israel's evil in another, yeah. That's, I wasn't even going to say that. That's amazing. You think Israel could be evil in another dimension? How could you tell? What would Israel be doing in a dimension where they were evil? It would be pretty bad

if I started off an issue of the comic book and it's like, what universe is this? It's like, oh, it's one of the many universes where Israel is an evil superpower. We call it Earth Prime. This is Earth One, where Israel is... Oh, my Christ. What did they do with this universe? We call it...

They invented compound interest. God damn it. That's horrible. Okay. All right. Mystic Marbles says, I enjoy the Eric July drama more than the Maddox drama. Maddox only has so many resources and ways to act retarded.

Eric has millions of dollars, a bunch of zealot followers, a shitty self-insert comic, and he's easily baited into arguing with his enemies directly, which Maddox never had the guts to do. The black gem is really getting bigger. Also, in I Saw Him 2, he's pissed because they burned down his warehouse. That's right. Yeah. They burned down part of his business thing.

Yeah. Which we would never do. We would never do. Um... I was gonna say, also, I thought it kinda seemed like Eric was, uh... finally accepted the idea that I should stop fighting the trolls. Yeah. But then I see him on Twitter and he's doing the same, like,

somebody comments under it and they're like, who's your warehouse? He's like, my warehouse is fine. Everything's fine with my warehouse. I'm like, just ignore these fucking people. It's crazy. He had a whole stream on why it's, you shouldn't ignore trolls.

Right. He had a whole stream on how it's basically, the situation he's going through is directly comparable to the Israel-Palestine conflict. Oh my God! I don't think we've talked about that. No, we haven't! No.

She's just so much dumb shit every day! You can't keep track- Dude, I feel like- You can't keep track of the dumb shit he says. It's like impossible. I fucking- I swear to God. I feel like in Demolition man when they bring Wesley Snipes back from freezing and everybody is a pussy That's how I feel every day when air July does something dumb and nobody says anything I'm like nobody's gonna do anything about this. It's all mine

You gotta you gotta bring up the Hamas the the Israel-Palestine clip you have to do it real do it at the end We can do it at the end. Let's do it at the end because I've got to search around for it. I don't want to... Yeah, you don't want to hold it down. But that is this man. He's an expert wordsmith. He goes, well, here's my take on Israel-Palestine. I've had a similar situation with my warehouse.

And you're like... I cannot believe that any man would compare what's going on. Whatever. I want to get five rabbis in a room and sit them down and then play them the clip of... So what do you think here? So 500 Palestinian children are dead.

You had a man tape money to your warehouse. I said rabbis, not... The parallels... Or whatever. Not mullahs or whatever they are. The parallels are undeniable, Dick. Not Mulas or whatever they are. The parallels are undeniable, Dick.

Ty Spence says, My school has a Palestinian foreign exchange student who got a call on Friday that tomorrow her parents and siblings would be killed because they're going to be bombed because the roads are too obstructed while others are trying to leave since Egypt closed their border. Vito thinking they could just leave

is probably the stupidest take he's ever had. Okay, they can't just leave, but they can go south. What's south of Gaza? They can be the south end. Yeah, Israel said they could all squish over. That's what Israel's saying. They're saying we're gonna bomb

all the shit in the north, so go south. Okay. You can get out of the way. Yeah. They're not gonna bomb the south part. Yeah. Have you seen the kosher light switch? What's that? There's not enough time for me to get into it Jesus Christ No, no, no

Is this all going to be about how I don't understand the geopolitics A lot of it's negative Just leave the Jews alone. That's it. That's the bottom line. If you don't paraglide into their fucking playland, they'll leave you alone. What if they're in your house? Well, it ain't your house anymore then.

Is it like a haunting? It's that classic joke. A Jew walks into a house and says, this is mine. My house. This is mine now. Pure Radio says, Vito, ignore all the people saying you're low energy. Fatigue is a common symptom of diabetes. You shouldn't be ashamed.

I don't have diabetes. Yeah, a lot of people were saying I was low energy on the last show, which I think I was. A little bit. But I'm back on a proper sleep schedule. Cody's. At least I didn't cry. Cody71111 says, everyone should block Lofty. I agree.

Everyone should, everyone block Lofty. I haven't blocked Lofty. Hashtag block Lofty pixels and never unblock him. Lofty agrees with me on Shadiversity being a bad AI artist though, so I have to respect him there. That guy Shadiversity, he's like a psychopath. He's retarded. He's a weird Mormon guy who likes playing with swords, and he made an entire video about how AI art—

Well, let's be clear. AI art is very cool, and I like playing around with it. Yeah. But he made an entire video about how people making AI art are the same as real artists, and we need to respect what they're doing And he to make this point he made an entire video about how he made his wife into Supergirl But the thing is if you watch the video He's like see I had to take it and then you've fucked around with a are you can like draw stuff on top of it?

And then it'll change that or you can like you know, yeah erase stuff Yeah, and he's saying the amount of time it took him to draw stuff on top of it and erase stuff makes him a real artist. And it just still looks like dog shit. Well, and it's obviously like his wife. Yeah. He's kind of like a dumpy face. He said, I have to train a model on my wife's face, which takes, what, 20 pictures, I think, to train a model?

Yeah. It's weird. It's weird that you're putting that out. You plug 20 pictures of your wife's face into AI art, and you said, make my wife into Supergirl. And it looks like dog shit. Well, that's the problem. Yeah.

Yeah, AI, I'm sure, is a great tool for artists, but you're a retarded person, so it's not art when you do it. Well, that's the problem, is that he's not an artist. So me, I have a lot of graphic design training. I'm like, oh, yeah. The actual image he generated, because he had this video go to his website go to his video I want to say he was arguing with people in one of my things about how it's actually a realistic pose never mind I can't find it right now go to his website rogue or you want to find yours still nah point is that the image he spent 20 minutes go to his go to his

website just go out the top to his profile and it'll give you his YouTube channel. YouTube.com. So he made an entire 20 minute video about how he's this incredible AI artist now. And all the comments are ripping him apart because they're like, you're a moron. A love letter to AI art. Okay, so

skip. First of all, this is his art, which sucks It's fucking terrible It looks like shit Yeah, he can't draw to begin with But he's always drawing these skinny girls Dude, like super unrealistic anatomy bullshit

And then look, he plugs it in the AI art So like, he's all excited Go back a little bit He's like, look, the one where he has two of them on the screen He goes, look, it took my dog shit picture, and it made it into this AI-looking dog shit. And you're like, those both look fucking terrible.

It's like really like hyper-fetishized though. You got 1.7 million weird people following this shit? Yeah, cause they're all like medieval swords and shit. Oh no! Here, give me the mouse real quick. Oh, please. Okay, cause I've watched this video, this video is like So first of all, he can't draw. And he goes...

I think he says, well, I drew this in high school, so that's why it's dog shit. But look, I put it in AI and it made it incredible. And you're like, no, it still sucks. This is still bad. So then he goes, I want to make a cool Supergirl picture, right? So he has to generate this, which you're like, yeah, that's kind of cool, I guess. But the AI did it. The AI did it.

Anybody could do that. Yes, you just plugged in a prompt, right? Yeah. But then he goes in to the image and he starts like fucking around with it. I did it. Anybody could do that. Yes, you just plugged in a prompt, right? Yeah. But then he goes in to the image, and he starts fucking around with it, and he goes, I don't like that the shoulders are so broad. So he shrinks her shoulders in, and you're like, no, this is correct proportions. It already spit it out with correct human proportions. You're actually just making it worse.

So because he shrunk the shoulders in and he pasted his wife's giant fucking football helmet head on top, look at how big her fucking head is compared to the rest of her. That's wrong. Her head is fucking gigantic. It's just so weird. It's like when Peter Griffin cut out a picture of himself and pasted on his wedding photo.

And look, the sun is back here, so how is the sun also in front of her completely? Dude, I mean it's I'm going dog shit. It's terrible any because he's not an artist You can't tell look the fucking Superman logo is all crooked. It's not even like straight on Yeah, and he literally says can we get can we get let me see if he says it he goes look at this piece this masterpiece as to how beautiful this image is Or as to how beautiful this image is. The lighting, the movement, the flow of the hair,

cape and cloth, the design of the outfit, the finer details, the metallic sheen. The design. Excellent design. And of course, it has the beautiful face of my wife. The build of the outfit. Now let's just compare. It looked better when it was like a fucking anime lady. You actually made it worse.

You made it uncanny. Because you put a real human face that's all stretched out like MODOK on a sex waifu that you had a computer make for you. And it looks like bad cosplay. It looks like a fucking Party City fucking cosplay. Anyway, here, let me try to find

the one that he did. Yeah, it's so funny. And you didn't do it. Like, you being like, I wanted to have gold piping, so I very quickly, like a fucking amateur, drew some, like, yellow lines on top of it

so the AI would reinterpolate it or whatever. It's like, yeah, I could have done that in about two seconds. It takes zero effort to do this. Damn it. That's gonna be too hard for me.

Oh, there it is! Yes! So this is what he's arguing with all my, you know, my guys, racist intimidators. That this is a natural pose. And then he made, he did the pose. Why would you ever hold a sword like that? What is the... And the thumb is over the...

It's like a legitimate sword move, because when you're doing swords, you've got to poke at their weak spots. It's not just about sword fighting, but it's... I mean, first of all, it's not... It didn't match the pose either. No, it's not matched at all.

But secondly, his fucking face. Look at his face. Here, you've got to scroll it over so they can see it. Look, dude, AI art is cool. It's cool to plug words into a thing and have it come out,

but you have to have the basic level of artistic training to look at something and go, oh, well, that's fucked. I can't use that at all. This pose is the most unnatural, stupid-looking thing, and my wife's giant fucking head looks incorrect on this terrible superhero body that I have pointlessly shrunk in the shoulders.

Anyway, Shad, you're a true artist. God bless your heart. God bless your wife. Just stick to playing with swords. You'll be happy. Only she has her husband to complain about woke Disney and make terrible AI art. Yeah, all right. So you won. Do you have anything you want to? Oh! husband to complain about woke Disney and make terrible AI art. Yeah.

All right. So you won. Do you have anything you want to? Oh, there's a segment that I kind of like. Okay. And I like to call this segment voting out. Calming. Oh, wow.

Are you going to the biggest problem? Cats, Q-tips, and Eric July. Wow. Remember to vote up Vito's Twitter. Yes. Yes. No. Do it. Or he'll kill your whole family.

I will do that. That will happen. All right. That's beautiful. Biggest fan in the world, he says. Okay. Put your name on the MP3s, you guys. That's the biggest problem.

Well, Dick, I have a very special voted up this week. Oh, good. Okay. Because I have two news stories on the same problem. And this problem comes all the way from episode one of the show. Can you believe it?

No. Wow. Well, that problem, Dick, that's one I think you'll be interested in, is Pokemon card scalpers. Wow. Well, that problem, Dick, that's one I think you'll be interested in, is Pokemon card scalpers. Okay. I remember those. You do remember those. Well, you would have thought, it's been two years since we did that problem, you would have thought it would have stopped by now, but it hasn't.

Real quick while I'm telling this story, why don't you Google Pikachu in gray hat? Okay. Because this past week, the Van Gogh Museum in Amsterdam had to stop giving out Pokemon cards inspired by Van Gogh after fans of the game caused a frenzy in the gift shop and resellers positioned themselves

outside the building. Oh, you fuckers. Dude, actually, real quick, see if you can look for the video of this. So there was a table with all this Pokemon fucking merchandise. Right. And the second the fucking thing opens, they all ran it.

Dude, it's a feeding frenzy of people grabbing every fucking Pokemon thing they possibly can. Hit the videos tab up there. Oh. And you'll probably be able to find it. Shoot. Just hit back. Hit back. All right.

Just give me the fucking mouse. No, no, no. You can't do that. That one? Yeah, yeah. That one? I don't know. One of them. Oh, you said videos. It is a video of it. Good morning! I don't want to hear this fucking jackass talking over it. Alright. Well, there is a video of this

feeding frenzy. I should have brought it up ahead of time. Is it that one? That one's only 56 seconds. Yeah, here, you can see it. Just turn off his fucking audio. Why is there always a guy talking over it? Just show it. As you can see, this is the Van Gogh Museum, which, again, had special cards in the image

of Pikachu, the beloved mascot of the Pokemon. Dude, in like 10 seconds, these cocksuckers took everything. This is in Amsterdam again. I hate that poor people have museums. Poor people? People. They're public museums.

It should all just be rich people having the art. They don't deserve it. The most obtained item, because they did have various Van Gogh Pokemon items, but of course the Pokemon card, which is based on Van Gogh's 1887 work, Self-Portrait with Gray Felt Hat. Yeah. It's Pikachu with Gray Felt Hat. Can now go on eBay for as much as $600. Cool.

Because of the chaos, the museum says we had to make the difficult decision to no longer make the special Pikachu promo card available in the museum. So that is Pokemon Scalpers Gone Wild. Yeah. But it doesn't stop there. Okay. Dick, did you hear this story where a Florida GameStop worker has been charged with manslaughter after fatally shooting a shoplifter who tried to steal Pokemon cards?

Oh, yeah. That made me think of you. It also made me think of me. The man snatched five boxes of pokemon scarlet and violet ultra premium cards that's a 600 value 120 dollars per gift set okay and ran for the door derrick guerrero 33 pulled a handgun from his waistband and shot hitting the man in the side the man drove was driven to the hospital by his waiting accomplice where he died from his injuries. Died several hours later.

That GameStop worker again now charged with manslaughter as it appears that the shoplifter, again, can't shoot a fleeing man. Even in Florida. This was in Florida. Oh, wow. Apparently you can't. I thought you could do whatever you want. Yeah, I thought you can just aerate people if they commit some sort of minor crime of some sort. Yeah.

Or not a crime, even. Just goofing around. Showing up. Just shoot people. Why not? Like happened at GameStop. Dick, Pokemon card scalpers currently number 342 with only 138 upvotes. I'm going to say based on this recent news.

Vote it up. Vote it up. Now let's take a trip. Are you going to the biggest problem? Can't you tip? Send Eric July. Remember to vote up Vito's Twitter. Or you'll kill your whole family.

Look at this guy. Look at this guy. Look at this guy. How is he? Why would you ever take that pose? It's not useful for anything. It's like showing off your sword. Why would you start with that one? If you were going to do a pose, why would you start with the goofiest, most awkward pose? And then turn yourself into a little anime girl.

I mean, I'll have to save this problem for another show. But guys who got big on YouTube for doing something stupid, thinking that they're a unique once-in-a-lifetime talent, that anything they touch turns to gold. Yeah. Just accept your limitations. There's some things you're good at. Complaining

about Marvel. Complaining about Disney. Showing off your collection of stupid replica swords. And there's some things that you're dog shit at, like making pictures of your wife to beat off to, of stupid replica swords. And there's some things that your dog should add, like making pictures of your wife to beat off to because you're weird. As Supergirl, for some reason. Big tits, you know?

Why would you want to ruin your... I would never put my girlfriend's face on like Tifa Lockhart's body. Right. It's going to ruin Tifa Lockhart. Yeah, why ruin that? That's our special time. That's Tifa Lockhart Yeah, why ruin that? That's our special time That's Tifa time I don't want to involve any other ladies You fucking weird freak

Why you love your wife so much? What are you, gay? Also, if you're so good at AI art, couldn't you invent a superhero character for your wife? No, you have to rely on the fact that somebody has already plugged in what a superhero is Yeah, because there's tons of You don't actually have the creativity No, you have to rely on the fact that somebody has already plugged in what a Supergirl is. So you don't actually have the creativity to come up with a new thing and train a model on that.

You have to go to something that already exists that the other programmers have provided you. Okay, here's my problem. I don't know what to call it, really. It's IRL. It's histrionic zoomers. IRL histrionics? Histrionic millennials and zoomers That apparently Interacting in IRL

Is like It's illegal It's illegal to do that It's illegal You got Maddox with his garbages You remember that? I've heard that story

Somebody What happened Someone took pictures of his garbages Yeah And he said my garbages? You remember that? I've heard that story. Somebody took pictures of his garbage. Yeah. And he said, my garbages. Right. Somebody took pictures of my garbages. Who knows what could happen with those pictures?

Who knows? Riley's putting money on people's doors. Eric and his millions of fans are going to shoot him. Someone going to a gravestone, taking a picture of that. It's just, maybe there's a skeleton there. Right. Probably not, honestly. They probably just dumped him in the ground.

Right. Put him in a little plywood box. You're not allowed to go to public places, Dick. That's the point. On the internet, you can do whatever you want. Right. It's fine. Right.

Leak DMs, do whatever you want. But if you leave your home, there's some sinister intent there. Even if you peek your head out, if you have in your mind that you might see the other person that you're dealing with. Someone you don't like you might see. Basically, then you should be killed. Especially if you're like that sniper wolf girl. Yeah. I know I have you blocked on Twitter right now, but I saw that you had a big argument with a famous person about that she should-

Well, semi-famous. I don't know. Semi-famous. Some YouTube people. That this poor girl with huge tits went to somebody's- drove by somebody's house. Yeah. Like everyone has done when I was in junior high. Everyone did all the time, you know?

Sure. And I guess she should be killed. Well, she took- I guess Hamas should kidnap her and rape her because she drove by someone's house and took a picture. She took a picture and she posted it online, which we all know is illegal. As I've been told by numerous people, that fits the definition of California cyber-stalking law, is to go to someone's house and take a picture of it with no identifying information or address or street name.

It would matter. None of that shit would matter. No, it does not matter. It's not illegal to do that. I can't even argue with it. Yeah. When people go like, well, you know, and it is. That's cyber-bullying.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's nothing. It's nothing. It's rude. Nobody likes it, but it's nothing. If I hate Barbra Streisand, I can still take a picture of her house, and I can post it on the line, and I can say, this is Barbra Streisand, I can still take a picture of her house, and I can post it on the line, and I can say, this is Barbra Streisand's house.

And I can even say, I hate this stupid bitch Barbra Streisand. Look at her stupid house. And that's not illegal. This is literally what the Streisand effect is. You know the Streisand effect is literally about a picture of a house, right? Oh, it is? Yes. I didn't know that.

The Streisand effect is about the fact that somebody took a picture of her house. Yeah. Which is, you can see it from the California coastline. You can just go, there's her house. It's even space. Yeah. And they took a picture of it. Yeah.

And Barbara Streisand said, you can't do that. I've hired a firm to scrub the internet of pictures of my house and issue takedowns and get all the pictures of my house taken down. And the government and people said, legally you can't do that, so we're going to spam pictures of your house everywhere to show you that you have no legal right to prevent people from taking pictures of your house.

Well, that's funny because I would say, my first reaction is to say... Or your warehouse. My first reaction is to say, shouldn't people know that? But then I think, well, they do. Like Eric Cholai knows that. This other guy that Sniper Wolf showed up at. They know it.

They just cry about being pretend. It's like pretend victimization. Like I was almost raped. I was almost killed. Yeah, I could be killed at any moment. You posted that picture at my house. A crazy person could come and rape me. Right.

Who's that guy that said he was... Shit, I have you blocked. Which guy? You could unblock me on Twitter. It would probably facilitate the show faster. Instead, I'm like, hey, I'd like to send Dick this information for the show. Oh, I'm blocked. Never mind. Hold on. All I'm blocking right now.

It was like a fun joke. I went home and I'm like, well, he'll unblock me at some point during this week. Look, this guy threatened to rape me because I said it was dumb. Oh, yeah. I know who it was. Rich, what's his name? ReviewTech

USA. He said, I'm definitely going.. What's his name? ReviewTech USA. He said, I'm definitely going. Is it okay if I come to your house and put your dick in my mouth? Yeah, he threatened to rape his mouth, me. I was being raped. Right. Forcible oral sex on you. Yeah, he's raping me with his mouth on my dick.

And I thought, that's a pretty odd. Did I talk about this on the show where ReviewTech USA is the same guy who found out his daughter is going blind? And I said, you should probably take some time off to deal with that. And he said, no, I'm going to really sink myself into my projects and apparently argue on Twitter about sucking off dick. Raping me?

And I want to be very clear, I'm not mocking this guy for the family tragedy he's having. I'm glad his daughter couldn't see this tweet. That's all I'm saying. Shut the fuck up. Don't make any jokes about it, okay? Would you want your daughter to see your dad threatening to rape a man's penis with his mouth?

I wouldn't want my daughter to see that. She doesn't know Braille yet, I hope. So she's not going to read it with her fingers. What is wrong with this? I'm not touching any of this. I'm not. I don't want to be yet, I hope. So she's not going to read it with her fingers. What is wrong with this? I'm not touching any of this. I'm not. I don't want to be raped. I'm the victim.

I do agree that this is not, if I was going through a family tragedy, I would not be fighting with Dick Masters on Twitter about whether or not I'm going to put his dick in my mouth. Forcibly. Right. He says, I said cry about it. I don't know. A hot girl went to a house. He goes, let me. She's a good looking lady. Oh, man. I don't know. A hot girl went to a house. He goes, let me-

She is a good looking lady. Oh, man. I'm so tired of all these people being like, she's an ugly skank. I'm like, now you're definitely lying. You can say she's like a bitch. She's clearly a bitch or whatever, and she's apparently stealing YouTube content to react to. Fine. You can be mad about that, but-

Oh, man. You can't say. If Diamond Wolf came to my house- I prefer her to put my dick in her mouth than ReviewTech USA. I'll say that. Oh man, I would put some shoes on a fishing line. Cast it out in the street. Lure her

in. That's how you get them. Lure her in. I would be in bed munching on blue shoes. I'd reel her ass right in. Well for those of you listening to the audio version of the podcast this tweet from ViewTechUSA responding

to Dick says well why don't you let me show up at your house uninvited show millions of Instagram followers where you live and see if you have the same reaction I'll even suck your dick just like you want Sniperwolf to does that still hit the same, you fucking idiot?

No. What the... At what point are you going through, I'm going to insult the shit out of this guy by telling him I'll even suck your dick. That's how I feel about... Again, I think this guy needs to take a little break from the internet. That's how I feel about all these guys

crying about, like, IRL anything. Like, you guys are so amped up on violence that you just, you can't be uncomfortable even for a second. Nobody wants weirdos showing up at their house. Yeah, but you can just go, first of all, if weirdos showed up at your house, this is somebody he knows. It's somebody he's been feuding with. It's not a stranger. He has his house address as his business address.

His house address is a registered business address. So literally, everyone's like, oh, that's so creepy. How'd she get there? And I went, oh, you can just go on Google and Google Jacks Films LLC

and it's literally the top result. So again, it's a public business address that anyone can find. People are saying, well, you could take the picture of the house and you could reverse geotag it

and plug it into a thing and blah, blah, blah. I'm like, or you could go on Google and search for it and find it in two seconds. Yeah. Or you can go to the Department of Records or whatever and go, hi, I would like the registered business address for Jack Films LLC because it is a business and all business addresses need to be public by the nature of law. His address is not sacred. I don't like that.

Neither is any celebrity's address. There are tours in LA where you get in a car and they take you to celebrities' houses. And even if you don't like the celebrities and wish harm upon them in your mind, it's still not illegal for you to go out in front of their house and go, there's Jack Black's house.

I hate that motherfucker. And then post it on instagram for everybody to know i hate this motherfucker look at that motherfucker's house that's not illegal you can hate a guy and take a picture of his house and tell people that you hate him and his house well you can like does not fit the definition of cyber stalking there's all these layers of it that are just wrong. Including this whole like you're going through these steps of finding someone's home. But it's just like, it's outside. It's a public street. Even like Bin Laden, it wasn't like

a private residence, you know? Okay, you have to find out. Everyone is like on earth. There's no like secret pocket dimension with a code that you have to get. It's not like your email, you know? You're like outside in the air. Now, I'm sure people are already maybe in the chat or whatever because I've been surprised at how many people are like,

no, that's cyber-stalking. That's doxing. It's illegal. She should go to jail. She should have her entire YouTube channel removed. Yeah. She deserves the death penalty. And I'm like, guys, just say it's really rude what she did and I don't approve

of it. That's fine. That was really- Because what you guys are doing is way more annoying. Yeah. Like we want to take away all our money and stuff. Well, that's the thing. If you just said like, I want her reputation to suffer, I'd go, that is fair.

That's fine. It's fair that you want people to think lower of her. To say, I want YouTube to step in and take all our money away forever. I'm like, I don't want that to happen. That happen yeah that sounds like that now you're the bad that sounds like that cancel culture thing that you guys keep claiming you're against but then anytime you identify a target which is easy because everybody hates them at that point in time you go well no we can cancel them we can take all their money away yeah because somebody else could show up at their house and rape their dicks with their mouth.

Just say, I don't like this lady, and I think what she did was very rude. I hate that she's getting away with it. That was very rude what she did. Yeah. I'm mad at how rude. I know it's not illegal, but it's very rude. But they don't want to be rude, because then they feel pathetic. Well, that's-

Because that's like what church ladies are. Like, well, I'm not just rude. I'm like standing up for common rude. I'm like standing up for common good. I'm like protecting somebody's life and a family and kids. It's not that I just don't like people who are rude. That's gay and lame.

That's like the lamest possible thing ever. So that's not me. I'm protecting kids. Anyone could have done anything, Dick. Same with Eric July's warehouse. Anyone could have seen that warehouse. Well, that's what they... It's all slippery slope arguments. That's the problem, is that they all go,

yeah, I know nothing happened this time. But you could imagine. But what if a guy came back with a machine gun? It's like, well, what if he doesn't, though? What logically... How does this logically lead? That's what they said about the warehouse. They're like, well, this is just the first step towards a mass shooting event.

And I go, lead me through the steps of how a guy goofing around and putting money on Eric July's door then leads to somebody with a... Nobody wants to kill Eric July, I'm pretty sure. Anyone who does want to kill Eric July, it's probably like a weird, stupid, moronic fantasy that they will never actually act out upon him. Who knows? Maybe they're out there. We don't know. But a logical human being can say, even if there's somebody out there who hates Eric July

and wishes harm upon him. It just doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. All those things they're trying to throw at you. It's like, what if something... It doesn't matter. That shit doesn't matter. That's crazy that you think like that.

That's how women think themselves into so much insane shit. Well, what if... I need to put my keys in my hands because what if there's a guy hiding under my car and he cuts my Achilles tendon? Like, yeah, is that how you live in your brain all the time? That's not the correct way to live. All situations contain some element of danger. Why go outside?

Somebody might just drive up in a car and shoot you in the head for fun. But you still go outside. Why do you even drive a car? Every time you get on the highway, you're theoretically taking your life in your own hands. More people die in a car. But you still get in your car and drive everywhere. You can't live life according to this weird what-if scenario. Yeah.

Especially when it's so ridiculous as posting a picture of someone's house on Instagram is a direct pathway to crazy people showing up and murdering his entire family. I don't buy it. You can't even give me any examples of that ever happening in history. Doesn't matter. There has never been any example of someone posting a house on Instagram and saying, oh, I don't like that guy.

And then a bunch of people murdering them. And you're right. Even if it did happen, it wouldn't matter. It's just dumb. Yeah. And then a bunch of people murdering them. And you're right, even if it did happen, it wouldn't matter. It's just dumb.

I saw it with, I saw the same thing with Isam's grave. Yes. Where guys were either going, well, this is how it starts. And then the next thing you know. They're smashing the grave into pieces. No, the next thing you know is people are murdering each other. Like, well, um. I think there's a couple steps in between.

Yeah. Why are you guys all pretending like that you're in a Warren G's, like we're regulators. You're not. You're comic book nerds. Because the most valuable currency in the modern market is victimhood. Yeah. Yeah. We only want to buy products from people who are victims. We only want to...

Is that it? Is it just a victim complex? Is that my problem? Yeah. This acceleration of this absurd... I mean, it's a part of it. It's a part of that problem, is that people... Because that's the thing.

I don't... I mean, this guy's threatening to suck my dick. I don't think... Just to stop me. I don't think Eric July thinks anyone's going to burst into his warehouse and kill him. I don't think Jack's Films actually believes that a picture of his house getting posted means he has a rational reason to fear for his safety. I think all these guys know, hey, if I'm the victim, I make more money.

Yeah. Yeah. I get all this attention. Sometimes people are actually victims. Like when we went to Netflix and someone smashed your head into a ball. Yeah. And that that you're legally like you genuinely i cried less over that than these guys are well that's the other problem

is that we're idiots because we could cash in way harder on that but we like have some weird morals where we're like well we can't play this up too hard i don't i tried but what are you gonna people don't care they only care because they want to abuse this woman well you want to be the well they collectively want to beat up a hot woman because they can't fuck her. I get it. I hate... When that Hamas shit happens, I'm like, well, I'll take that. Pardon me, pardon me. Not all of me. I think if a guy went to... did this thing,

there would be far less outrage. But who knows? Do you think Sniper Wolf will see this? And fuck us? Yeah, me. Well, yeah, us. Okay, I'll take us. That's all I really want. That's really all I'm doing. People keep saying that she's not gonna fuck me, but I think she's seen that so many times. She didn't say no, so...

Yeah, exactly. I think she's definitely gonna fuck me. That's the only reason. Fucking shit. Look, again, and I know everybody's mad, and they're like, but she stole people's content, and it was mean what she did. Sure. I don't care. Say she's a rude bitch. She's been demonetized for a period of time. Take that victory to the hole or whatever.

But wanting to take away her entire channel and wanting to ruin her life. It's just so annoying. Over a five second incident where she drove by a guy's house and took a picture is frankly evil. I'm going to say I don't want to take away somebody's entire life for that.

I don't think that's reasonable yeah and if she had posted his actual address I would almost be there with you like what the fuck why are you doing that

what did you want to happen but taking a picture of his house I can't get there I just don't care I'm not there for the life ruination um okay

that's my problem what a problem Dick victim uh victim complexes I don't know maybe that's it victim complexes you'll see well Dick I've got a little story for you What a problem, Dick. Victim complexes. I don't know. Maybe that's it. Victim complexes.

You'll see. Well, Dick, I've got a little story for you. It was my birthday recently. Yeah. What would you say about that? How do you feel? Say happy birthday is what I was... Oh, my God.

Happy birthday. Thank you, Dick. Don't forget, you at home can super chat your birthday wishes as well. Well, happy birthday to me. A little late. Whatever. What was your actual birthday? A couple days ago.

We went to a German restaurant. Very tasty. Had ourselves a meal. But one thing about that restaurant, parking kind of sucks in that area, right? Yeah. Did you find a decent parking spot? No I know exactly

I thought of this problem yesterday When I was in that area No When I was driving by that place Going to Pilates I swear to God I know exactly what you're going to fucking say Because every time I go there There's this gigantic

yeah empty bank of america parking lot there's probably 60 empty spaces just sitting there a giant empty piece of land where people could be parking their cars and going to all the neighborhood attractions there There's bars. There's restaurants in that area. But you're not allowed to park there. No. Because we live in a society. Dick, my problem is unused parking lots.

Yeah. This is bullshit. It's bullshit. Now, did you know that parking takes up one third of land area in all U.S. cities? I didn't know that. Nationwide, there are an estimated eight parking spaces for every car we have so many fucking parking lots you know the and you're not allowed to use the the uh the creator of sim city yeah i was listening to this interview with him and they said well what do you do to make it like more realistic he goes well honestly we can't

because it would just be parking lots. Yes. That's what the game would be. The game would just be parking lots. The game. And not even parking lots that are being used. That's the fucking insane thing about it is that they're all private property. And instead of being like, okay, the bank closes at five.

After five, the parking lot is now usable yeah just the general public yeah yeah don't cause any trouble don't break any windows or whatever else but clearly we should allow people to use this there's got to be like an airbnb for parking for that yes there needs to be i get so angry every time i'm right down the street from there every time i go to pilates there is an east bank that's on the other side of the Bank of America. Because the Bank of America is open then. But the East Bank doesn't open until like 11. But they have a fucking security guard to make sure nobody parks there.

So I have to go an additional block over to park at Whole Foods. Which doesn't have that. That's so, it's like so aggravated. How has this never been solved? This is like an obvious problem. Why does it even need to be solved? Because people, if they parked there, if they allowed it, they would fuck it up.

They'd be like, oh, we got a full parking lot and nobody, everybody's gone. Well, a bunch of people would park their RVs and start living there. Yeah. That's a whole separate issue. Dick, with rapid post-World War II development and explosion in car ownership, cities and towns across the U.S. introduced minimum parking requirements

in the 1950s. These are zoning ordinances that required all new businesses to include off-street parking lots. Those mandates remain nearly universal across America. So every building now has a fucking parking lot that you're not allowed to use.

Like, who comes up with that when you come up with a handicap parking too yes never used never used okay when you come up with the rule that every building needs a parking lot you also need to come up with the rule that and anyone can use it it doesn't just sit there unused uh zoning laws typically require one parking space per apartment. That makes sense. 300 square feet of commercial for each, one parking lot per 300 square feet of commercial development and one parking spot per 100 square feet for restaurants.

That means that a typical restaurant's parking lot is three times the size of the dining area. Just giant fucking empty parking lots. And parking... How is this not solved in L.A.? Like, you would think L.A. L.A. would be the worst one. That would be the last place it's solved.

Because all just homeless transients would take it over and fuck it up? Because it's, uh... I mean, it's just criminals running the city, so why would it be... This is the last thing they want to do is solve anything. No.

Just make it worse and worse and worse until everyone kills themselves. So I had to park all the way up the hill. And I'm walking towards the restaurant the whole time. Just my eyes are locked. It's giant. That parking lot is so fucking. For a little bank.

I know. It's the biggest fucking. And there's not a single car. There's a fucking. Okay. There's a restaurant near the freeway. Fuck, what's it called? Salzar's.

Okay. Amazing restaurant. Amazing restaurant. Yeah. The parking is fucking impossible. Yet, right behind, because it's a bunch of like production studios that are just always open at exactly the wrong time and none of them have parking lots that are publicly accessible. They're all using it for storage.

It's all in the street. The streets have fucking rules. It's impossible to find parking. You go there like a half hour early, you're just half hour early some pepper. There is a gigantic lot. Yeah Right next to it like gigantic. That's all just dirt. That's fenced off God forbid They just get rid of the fence down or so everybody could park there every fucking day But this will never happen. We all just sit there and walk by like go like, well, yeah, that'd be a great place to park.

Wouldn't it be cool if you could park there? Obviously we can't, though. We take a picture of it so I can dox this fucking lot owner. It's one of those problems that has existed for so long without anyone ever attempting to solve it in any meaningful way. Where you go, I truly do live in hell. Yes. I live in a land where problems, many of them the biggest problems, including this one, are just so fucking obvious.

We don't have enough parking. And there's no possible way to solve it. So let's just forget about it. No, you know what you need to do. You need to come up with a way that somehow people have access to this. The fact that it exists, the fact that you required people to build it by law. You made a law that says you have to build this thing, and no one is allowed to ever use it except during these specific hours for this building.

They're shopping for you. How many people are ever in that Bank of America? How many cars could possibly, like, five or six? Max, I've only ever seen five or six. That lot has room for 120 fucking cars. It's fucking infuriating. Unused parking lots is the biggest problem in the universe. Well, you've really been slacking and phoning it in lately, but that was probably the best problem ever.

It's been a good one. Everyone should be able to identify with that. I can't believe you've snaked me to that problem. You beat me to that one. Yeah, that should have been one of yours. You're probably doing more parking. I won't leave my house in LA because, you know what? Okay.

I have such parking anxiety about LA. You do? Yeah. I'm like, I can't go anywhere because I'm not going to be able to find parking. And if I find parking, I'm going to fuck it up and it's going to be like you only have two hours and I'm going to go over by five minutes and I'm going to get a $200 ticket. Speaking of which, Andy Signore left his parking ticket

in your house somewhere. Is it here? It was upstairs, remember? Because he was showing it to us. Yeah, I don't, I mean, you know. Oh, well, Andy. If it's in this room, it's here, but if it's upstairs, then. Andy, you're... I have a drawer for tickets and stuff that it might be in. Well, again, Andy was in LA and he parked in the wrong place for five minutes because parking is a scam and nonsense. Yeah.

And got a $100 parking ticket. And if you could just use the parking lots that were all freely available, because this doesn't need to be a big deal, he wouldn't have got that parking ticket. Andy, maybe look it up on the city website. Now I'm in a real bad mood. It's infuriating. I know. It really is.

And it's that parking lot. Every time I go to that restaurant, I look at that fucking parking lot. Everything is based off of that. There's some degree of everything else. Somebody came up with something 50, 60 years ago, and it has been completely fucking us ever since, and no one's ever attempted to solve it rationally.

But it's also, like, how many houses and apartments are just empty, and you can't put homeless people in them because they're crank addicts and they'll fuck them up, but there's some that are not... Yeah, there's just, like, an abundance... There there is an abundance of resources but we cannot connect the dots because the people who need it are not they do not deserve it right uh the people who are in a position see here we go sure the people who are in a position to connect them are criminals are evil criminals the people putting in that position are dumb. And then the people who own it are getting

shafted and taxed for it. It's like, yeah, you guys, you've just built the worst possible system ever. You built the dumbest system. You built the absolute average, average-est system you could. Good job. Isn't it genuinely fascinating that society continues to function on this, like, mishmash of interlocking parts that are all

evil and fucked? And you're like, I mean, kind of. Howing parts that are all evil and fucked and you're like i mean kind of oh it's just working at all it's not the only reason it works is literally everybody's like i hate capitalism you're like you can't get rid of it it's the only way we can go like well you can't fuck around too much because then you run out of money all right you can only fuck around a certain amount well uh when jenllen said, yeah, we have enough money for two wars, I'm like, well, I mean, if this doesn't, if we're not doing like violence and riots and shit after that, then it's never happening. Yeah. Like this is, you can't say anything worse than that. Sure, we got enough wars.

We got enough money for all the wars you could ever imagine. Just keep printing The dollars baby Yeah Whose kids are paying For that And using them To fund parking lots That you're not allowed

To use Alright How's the parking At the capitol That's why they were rioting Couldn't find a place To park Where did they all park

That's a good question Do they have to walk Really far to their cars Maybe Yeah Maybe that's why They broke in They're like God fucking damn it I'm Do they have to walk really far to their cars? Maybe. Yeah. Maybe that's why they broke in. They're like, God fucking damn it. I'm going to have to walk all the way back to my car.

Maybe I can get a cop to give me a ride to jail and have them walk all the way back to my fucking car. That shaman guy called into my show last week. Yeah. How was that? He was cool. He's a white guy that does mushrooms, so you know. He's always wearing a Halloween costume. The FBI stole his hat.

Yeah. And they won't give it back. Well, they got to put it in the Smithsonian along with the blue suit that Congress guy wore where he picked up trash. They should put it in there. They should. What about a heist to steal that suit? Enemies of America. They should have, like, an exhibit and it's just all the January 6th guys, you know, like, their mug shots or whatever and go,

on the day that crisis was averted thank God somebody picked up the trash. Does anybody have the Hamas parachutes? That's a good question. Do they leave them there? They can't. Yeah, you're not gonna you know, once you're killing guys, you don't want a big fan on your back. Yeah, or even

like that. They take it off. And they're kind of they probably are getting chafed. Yeah. They have that harness. Like, I don't want to rape. I'm doing a bunch of rapes tonight. I got to get rid of this harness so I don't get, you know, a chafed wiener. I saw one festival guy was wrestling with a Hamas guy, and he took his fan, and he got away into the air. Oh, he did?

Yeah, it was exciting. The Hamas guy or the festival guy? The festival guy, yeah. He took his fan, and then... He's like, you come in here, you try to... And he punched him out, and like the Rocketeer, he grabbed it. Yeah, and he just took off. Yeah, he A-teamed him.

Wow, that's cool. Pretty sure that video's on Palestinian TV. I don't think it would be the A-team, though. That's what they call him. The Jew who flew. Pixar movie? Yeah. He got away.

He was the one survivor to tell the tale. I bet Anne Frank wished she had a big fan in a parachute. Fan Frank? Fan Frank. Ah, times. Bad. We were talking about before the last show. Did it pick it up?

Talking about Lisa Frank confusing it with Anne last show Did it pick it up? Talking about Lisa Frank Confusing it with Anne Frank Did what pick it up? I remember we were talking about it Because we were talking about it before the show Yeah I love the idea that Lisa Frank Creator of colorful notebooks

Was paying homage to her ancestor Anne Frank Who famously her notebook was cut short She said all children should have a notebook I think her notebook was extended actually By her dad by her dad. No, her dad took stuff out of it. Oh, really? Yeah, because there's a bunch of stuff where she's like, yesterday I fingered myself.

And he's like, well, I don't need to hear about that. Save that one for me. They eventually put it back in. But there's like some sexual stuff that he's like, I don't know if I want people reading about that part of my daughter. What a killjoy. Let's focus on the tragic. Come on, buddy.

Let's put some... Yeah, you gotta... Make this thing could be a bestseller. Spice it up. Let's put some of this... And we can... Plausible deniability. There was some of her

Sonic the Hedgehog inflation fan fiction I think he took out. Oh, that Anne Frank wrote? Yeah. She had an entire... I would love if Knuckles put his fist in Tails' butt and inflated him.

She had an entire half-Sonic, half-Pikachu character she had invented. I heard she had a thing where Quagmire's face was like a toilet. And Tails was shitting his... Tails had like a big swollen stomach of poop. I think his poop is going a little too far. That's a meme, isn't it? I'm pretty sure

the poop mouth... Wait, there's a poop mouth Sonic toilet meme? I didn't just make that up. I hope you didn't just make that up because Jesus Christ, that's horrifying. Okay. Okay, the secrets of Anne Frank's diary have been revealed. That's a good problem. I'm never going to beat that. Mine is when deodorant's not unscrewed enough out and it scrapes your armpits, the edges.

Yeah, the edges of the plastic thing. You don't have it going out far enough. You use the stick. What do you use? I use the spray. Spray? Somebody brought me spray at the show. Fuck the ozone, man.

Oh, is that why people don't use it? That's why they don't use it. You know, the aerosol. I just don't want it to like get all over everything. What if you aim it directly at your fucking armpit? Then it's like a spray paint. I don't want like a damp spot there. I love the spray.

Really? Do you spray it all over yourself? I hit the under the arms and maybe occasionally one line down the middle. Oh, a line down the middle. Yeah. Just quick. The stick just stays in one spot pretty much. But then there's...

But then you're scraping the plastic. We use... My fucking girlfriend decided to start using the same deodorant as me, just in case. Just in case. One person. I'm like, I don't want that. You're crossing armpits then.

Yeah, because then you smell like me. She's like, it's fine. Don't worry about it. Well, it's not like bacteria under the armpit. I don't think you want to share. Not sharing. It's the same brand. Yeah, but how do you keep them separate? Well, that's exactly the point. So, we're in Greece and I go,

what the fuck? I'm taking off like a whole dermis under my arm. What the fuck is this shit? Oh. Somebody has this all the way down under the... What are you... What the fuck is going on here? You gotta go all the way.

She's like, well, then I put the cat back on it, it scrapes it sometimes. That is a small price to pay for this shit. I got a big rash here. Okay. But now it's in my head. Well, just screw it more when you do it.

Screw it out more? You're right, this is a shitty problem. I'm definitely gonna win. But then, she's right, it does scrape off. It does scrape off. And then you got it all over your fingers more? You're right. This is a shitty problem. I'm definitely going to win. But then she's right. It does scrape off. It does scrape off. And then you got it all over your fingers.

That's why I use the spray. I don't want to use a spray. You're saying that now, but I think if you did it, you would like it. I don't want people knowing that I'm putting deodorant on, though. I want it to be in secret.

Oh, you don't want to hear the hiss? You don't think the hiss is you don't want to give it away? Yeah. That's why I take it off real slow. Give it away now. And go. You're a quiet deodorizer.

Then I come out and people are, I want them to be surprised that I smell like that. Like, wow, that guy smells great. He smells like pure sport. And I'll say that's right. But if they hear, then they're going to go, here he's coming. I bet fucking Mr. Smell Good's going to come out. Mr. Smell Good. Here he comes.

You're self-conscious about your deodorizing. Yeah, don't you think? No, I think this is a terrible problem and you're gonna lose. But you get those scrapes. This is the finger pain of episode 111. You just don't do anything. Like, normal people use that stick. This shit is from the 70s.

Or 70s, maybe 80s. Not past 1983. So you're telling me embrace tradition, reject modernity. No, actually. Modernity. I don't like that meme. No one does. Well, some people do.

Weirdos do. Yeah. Who think that. Shadowversity loves that meme. He said that verbatim in one of his videos. What a retard. And he's all into sword fighting and shit. He was mad that.

Why don't you go shit outside, dummy? He was mad that Buzz Lightyear video. When your potato bitch wife goes shit outside. You fucking idiot He's one of those guys who because the Buzz Lightyear movie had like a two-second kiss and he's like well You got a reject you got to reject Modernity and embrace tradition. Are you doing AI? Cuz you are not a good artist and your brother is a world famous artist. And now you've got to like shit all over his thing because you're fucking pathetic. Okay, so I'm going to tell you something that I don't know if you're aware of it.

Shadiversity has a graphic novel coming out. Oh, yes. And I'm pretty sure we're going to get a copy. Well, Shadiversity, when Eric Gilles said that he was going to sue us. Oh, he went big. He went hard in the paint against myself. Shadowversity, the quartering, all these fucking idiots came out. I'm coming after you guys.

I got a list like Steve Buscemi. If you want to talk about secret lists. I have a very open list. We have a very open list. I'm going to tell you all the time. You have picked a fight. I think it was a bad fight to pick because we will endlessly ridicule your... If you make a bad comic, your comic better be good.

Your comic better be good. My comic is good. It's already good. What are you going to do after your comic comes out? Kill myself because I've accomplished it all. What are you going to do for real, though? Are you going to make a free digital comic? Yeah.

Actually, you know... You're going to do digital comics like pop, pop, pop, pop. None of this year-long shit. I know. I'm going to... People get bored. I know. I'm going to come up with some sort of assembly line process where I can make comics faster.

Come up with that now. I'm working on that, okay? I've got to find more people. You need an artist. Also, I'm hoping... Pop it out. I'm hoping AI art continues to get better. If AI can handle coloring, which I think it will be able to do very easily.

That's honestly, if it can do that and you just need to provide a line art. Just make it black and white. Nah, I've thought about it, but people really want color. They're like very insistent on it. Who people? Just the people who want the comic. People like black and white all the time. Here's the thing.

I'm going to do color for the first issue. Garfield. Black and white, mostly. I love black and white. Family Circus. Black and white. I love black and white comics. I really do.

No one gives a fuck what Jeffy's pants are colored. For some reason, Americans, and most of my customers are American, they really want the comic to be colored And I respect Let me see the data Let me see the percentages that you got for this I'll put up a poll, I don't know Put up a poll, everybody vote black and white There are a lot of advantages to black and white

There really are Yeah, it's easy It's faster What about porno comics, black and white? Here's what I'm thinking No big deal In fact, it's better It's weird when they're colored.

Yes. I think no matter what, the first issue will be colored. It's possible that that's like the big marquee color issue, and then we just go to black and white for the rest of it. Oh, man. Oh, man. I also, and here's an idea that I've been kicking around. I want to do a companion webcomic.

So I want to find a second artist to have like the side adventures that are like kind of fun and comical and four panel four panel comic? Yeah. Like a family what are you calling? Like Stone Toss? It's going to be like racist and stuff?

I mean. That would be cool. Stone Toss does do four panel comics. I'm not going to make racist ones necessarily. What about Wormwood? Those are cool too. More racist than Stone Toss. Peanuts was four panels, right? Garfield is four panels.

Garfield's three. Dilbert I know is three. Scott Adams, if you wanted to. No. Scott Adams famously said, I made Dilbert three panels Because that's 25% less work I'm like that's the reason No it's better for punchlines

Or something Joke ass I don't know what's four actually I think Peanuts was four panels Peanuts is four panels? I think Dagwood was four panels Originally comic strips were all four panels Just look up four, comic strips were all four panels, I think.

Peanuts. Just look up four panel comic strips. Old strip. Oh. Four panel comic strips. I think all the classic ones were always expected to be four panels. Okay, yeah. Peanuts. That's not peanuts.

Oh. Why did you think that was peanuts? I don't know. Calvin and Hobbes, that's four, I guess. Calvin and Hobbes. I think he changed the number of panels. I don't know if it was a strict rule. What about the far side?

You could do those. One panel? Just with that kneeling on George Floyd's neck, that's one panel right there. Oh, my problem, Dick. I recently saw one of those articles, one of those classic articles that you always see. Top 100 video games. Okay, and you look at those lists, one of those classic articles that you always see. Top 100 video games. Okay, and you look at those lists and you go, I know they're going to fuck it up because I know what they're going to do.

And what do they do? They put Zelda Ocarina of Time at number one. The best video game of all time is Zelda Ocarina of Time. And I look on the list. I'm like, well, how'd they rank the Marios? And they went the Marios? And they go, and the best Mario ever is Super Mario 64. No, that one was horrible.

And they go, and the top 20 is some bullshit like Banjo-Kazooie. Why? Because an entire generation has been poisoned with N64 nostalgia. Oh, yeah. Okay, guys. GoldenEye. I think, I don't know what happened. I know, I was in the right age group.

I grew, yes, I remember growing up with the N64. I remember going to people's houses to play GoldenEye. I remember. I remember playing Mario Kart. It was very fun. These are fun childhood memories. But I also remember getting older and being like man a lot of those games Are dog shit

And then getting like a Playstation 1 At the same time as the N64 And going man these games are just Clearly better Than what the N64 has This fucking controller sucks The controller is complete fucking dog shit It makes no sense and it breaks every two seconds.

The odds of finding a not-broken N64 controller are... Because the stick falls apart. Because you know what holds the stick in? The fucking motion? It's just a rubber band, and the rubber band stretches out, and it's impossible to replace and fix. The N64, look. It has its place.

It has some stuff about... Every game console... How do you follow up on such a great problem with this dog shit? Well, I'm already going to win with the parking lot thing, so now I just get to rant about why the N64 is complete dog shit. Yeah. The N64 has five. Oh, it's the N64.

Okay. The N64. Every console has some good games. Uh-huh. The N64 has five of them. Only five. GoldenEye. Nope.

Wait, let me guess. Okay. Superman 64? No, you know that's not one. F-Zero, yes. That's one of the five good GoldenEye. Nope. Wait, let me guess. Okay. Superman 64? No, you know that's not one. F-Zero, yes. That's one of the five good games. Okay. Turok.

Dinosaur Hunter. No, but that one is fun. But it's not good. Perfect Dark. No. Sim City? N64 version? Sim City on N64?

No. Yeah. You done? That's where you want to do, that's where you want the precision controlling of the game controller. Of an N64 controller. Yeah. Yeah, you don't want a mouse or a keyboard or anything.

I couldn't believe they put that out on the N64. Well, you got F-Zero. You got any other guesses? Mario 64. Mario 64. That's two good games. Wario. Kirby.

Zelda. Obviously Zelda. Nope. Zelda is bad. Okay, what are they? Mario 64. F-Zero, Star Fox, Pokemon Snap. Pokemon Snap sucks! Pokemon Snap is great. And Wave Race. It's fucking dumb. No, it's not. You take pictures of Pokemon. You're riding around on a, like a roller coaster? Yeah. Slow as shit. And you gotta get the perfect shot of it it That's like A great idea for a video game They all look like crap though

It's just you're taking Like pictures of Well every N64 game looks like crap So you can't ever say that The pictures you take It's not real So it's just like Oh it's just like a crummy picture

No but it's really like Engaging to like You gotta speed up Or you have to throw a thing Or you have to like Wait for the perfect timing Oh man that game fucking sucked You're an idiot

Pokemon Snap is brilliant. What was the last game? Wave Race 64. Oh, yeah, I remember that one. That one's just real good. I'll say this. Mario Kart's good. I'll say there's six good games.

Mario Kart 64 is also classic. Here's the thing. Look, Goldeneye was fun at the time, but if you go back and play it, let's be real, it's one of the worst first-person shooters ever. You only enjoyed it because it was the first time you were able to play Deathmatch,

probably because you didn't play Doom Deathmatch. Every other first-person shooter is better than Goldeneye. Zelda is a tedious, confusing piece of shit. All you do is walk around super slowly in this big fucking empty world devoid of any personality or anyone you actually want to meet or talk to. You have to memorize a bunch of Songs you don't know that that's life when you're a kid, so it's cool Oh my god going back and trying to play ocarina of time is the worst fucking chore

And then you have to do all these crate puzzles and for some reason the developers were like you know the best part of Crate puzzles are it's when the character makes this horrific grunting noise and pushes it one inch at a time It's when the character makes this horrific grunting noise and pushes it one inch at a time. Eh! Eh! Eh! Eh! And it takes like ten ehs to get the fucking crate into place. I do hate the Nintendo 64. I fucking hate it. I didn't have one, though, when I was a kid. I had one, and you know what I did?

I threw it away. I sold it to get a PlayStation 1. Because I was like, when I bought it, I was like, well, clearly it's going to have the new Final Fantasy and all that shit. And it's like, no. You know why it doesn't have those things? Because it's designed by a fucking moron child. The worst thing, now an N64 cartridge holds 64 megabytes. Yeah.

A CD holds 650 megabytes. Yeah. So about 10 times as much game data can fit on a CD. You can't fit that much on that fucking cartridge now The worst part I think of the n64 were the graphics they looked fucking terrible. Why do they look so bad? I'm gonna tell you yours enough room the n64 only had 4k of texture memory Compared to the PlayStation which had one megabyte K of texture memory compared to the PlayStation, which had one megabyte.

So that means every texture at max was a 64 by 64 inch, or 64 by 64 pixel icon, which was then stretched to fit giant fucking polygons. Now, the developers knew this

looked like dog shit. So rather than go, hey, we've clearly designed a monster of a console, which is complete garbage compared to the competition, why don't we just not use cartridges so we have more room for texture memory and the architecture or whatever else? Instead, they came up with the brilliant idea

of applying a bilinear filter, which turned everything into fucking mud, which is why every N64 game looks like you took a good game and smeared fucking Vaseline all over the screen so everything smudges together into a complete garbage nightmare, which looks terrible. And the way they excused it was, well, you're playing it on a CRT, so people won't even notice.

And now that we have new technology where we can play the games on a good TV, we can go, oh, it doesn't look any better. And it's never going to look any better. I remember people would call into the game store or whatever when my buddy was selling N64s and they'd go, it just looks wrong. It's horrible. It's all blurry. He's like, yeah, because you're playing it on a good

TV. It was designed to trick you into being like, well, it probably just looks all smudged up. It looked like shit all the time. Because of my TV. But it was so expensive. That's the other problem. N64 games were at minimum like $60. You got a big stack here for the N64. The good ones.

No, no, no, no. That's a bunch of other stuff. How old is this system? N64 games were like $80. Yeah. It was like $80 to get Mario 64. I remember that. And PS1 games were $50 across the board.

You could pirate them too. Eas board. You could pirate them too. Easily. You could pirate them. You could get a boot disc and have a good time. Now you had to get a mod chip. I don't understand when people... You know when I knew Keemstar was stupid? Okay. I just bought a complete

N64 game library. He bought every N64 game in the box and I went, oh, Keemstar is a moron because anyone who wants to own... I just get that flash cart thing. That thing is cool. Load it all on that. And honestly there are actually some N64

emulators now that remove that blur filter through some sort of magic processing or whatever that actually tell it not to implement that at the fucking software level. So actually playing actual N64 games looks worse than playing them on an emulator. Anyone who wants to own the complete N64 library, to the exclusion of other, why would you, the PlayStation 1 was the superior system in every way.

But it's bad nostalgia. You have to. There's no such thing as bad nostalgia. It's all bad. Okay. It's just nostalgia that people liked having it as a kid. You have to. There's no such thing as bad nostalgia. It's all bad. Okay. It's time that's dead. I have no problem with nostalgia when people admit, yes, it was stupid and bad. I only like it because I was an idiot child. That's great. There's

a lot of things that I liked because I was an idiot child. Every day I woke up to watch the Mighty Max cartoon. How about like- The Mighty Max cartoon is not good. Uh, yeah. Masters of the Universe. Everybody's mad at Netflix. They're like, I can is not good. Masters of the Universe. Everybody's mad at Netflix. They're like, I can't believe they ruined Masters of the Universe. And you're like, are you a moron?

Masters of the Universe was always stupid. Because it was about men. They made it about women. It was already a bad cartoon. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Nothing about men is as bad as the best thing about women. Sure. Name me one good thing that's women. Well, sex with women.

That's not good because of them. This is my fucking penis. Teddy milk. You need it to keep your baby alive. Alright. I can't make it. So what is it? This is a top 100 list. Did you see that

top 100 hottest women? There was a trans woman on it. Hey, maybe. Was it. So what is it? This is a top 100 list? Did you see that top 100 hottest women? There was a trans woman on it? Hey, maybe. Was it a good-looking trans woman? What? What do you mean, what? There's some good-looking trans ladies out there. Is that nostalgia talking?

That's nostalgia. So you're mad about nostalgia? I'm mad about specifically... What if someone said, like, Game Boy is the best system ever? Would you say, Donkey Kong, you know something? You suck. Mortal Kombat's a good game, but Donkey Kong is the best game of all time. I just wish everybody would stop pretending.

Look, if you have a top 100 video games list... They always post them. It's like clickbait shit. You gotta stop. It was some game magazine. Don't give them this. Just people need to... Look, Ocarina of Time is not...

Ocarina of Time is not even the best Zelda game. Which one is? What's the best Zelda game? Probably Link's Awakening. Which one is that? It's on the Game Boy. The Game Boy? Link's Awakening is really good. I made a guy play it. It was on the original Game Boy. They fucking...

They remade it for the Switch. They have a Switch version of it now and it's all 3D or whatever Okay Link's Awakening Link to the Past Probably Tide I like Link's Awakening a little more But if you said you like

What about Zelda 2? That was a good one Side scroller Mix it up Yeah mix it up Zelda 2 is terrible You could fight that clone I finally beat

Get some magic I finally beat Zelda 2 After like 30 years of beat Zelda 2 After like 30 years of Having Zelda 2 It's cool Satisfying It's interesting

It's definitely not a good game Probably That's probably the best Zelda game I would say Zelda 2 is very interesting It is not a good game Stop saying that It is

It is the close It is It's interesting I see what they were trying to do But it's bad They were trying to nail it Ocarina of Time is trash Majora's Mask is trash Banjo-Kazooie Yeah It's interesting. I see what they were trying to do, but it's bad. They were trying to nail it. Ocarina of Time is trash.

Majora's Mask is trash. Banjo-Kazooie. Donkey Kong 64. Go back and look. They all look like shit. They're not that fun. And everything they did, the PlayStation did better. All right.

Nintendo 64. Nostalgia. Nostalgia 64. How's that? Boom. Roasted. Okay. Nostalgia? Nostalgia 64. How's that? Boom. Roasted. Okay. Nostalgia.

And anyone who argues with me is a child. Nostalgia 64. Or you did it on a PS1. Unused parking lots. Unused parking lots. Or empty parking lots, whatever you want to say. Well. I don't know. Unused.

Unusable parking lots? Let's put empty parking lots. Empty parking say. Well. I don't know. Unused. Unusable parking lots? Let's put empty parking lots. Empty parking lots. Okay. Empty parking lots. Mine were scraping your arm. With deodorant. Yeah.

Your armpit. Deodorant scrapes. Armpit. With deodorant. Deodorant damage. I love alliteration, baby. I know. But then people look at it like, I don't know what any of this shit is.

Nobody votes. Okay, you know what? Don't vote for vetoes problems. Vote them into the fucking dirt. Vote all of mine up. No, go vote. What was my other one? IRL.

IRL. Victim. IRL victim. IRL retardation. IRL victim. IRL victim. You have no idea what that is. IRL victimhood.

IRL victim complexes. Fear of IRL. Fear of IRL. Yeah, histrionic fear of IRL. I'm sure people will figure out what it is. Guys, don't forget to vote on all the problems at biggestproblem.show. And once again, bonus episode, Biggest Problem problem in Halloween a spooky adventure Available at patreon.com slash biggest problem and back dot by slash biggest problem. What did I not put the voicemails in here shit?

I'll buy some time by singing my favorite song damn it. It's the biggest put it in here So I put them in the wrong Show am I supposed to show this shirt on. Did I put them in the wrong show? Am I supposed to show this shirt on? Is this something somebody sent us for the show? Yeah, that's for you. I already looked at them on my show, but the one that's 3XL is for you. It's for all that's funny.

Did you have to say the one that's 3XL? I think we all knew that. Well, I'm just fucking letting you know. Soon I'll be at 2XL. As long as I keep eating my beef and broccoli. Have you weighed yourself this month? No, I had to go get a new 9-volt battery for my scale. You burned it out?

I don't think I burned it out. I don't think that's what happened. I think it ran out normally. God damn it. I guess I didn't put them in the fucking thing. You don't have any voicemails? No. I'll just watch Eric July's video about video games. And his Palestine thing. Yeah, let's watch the Palestine thing. You don't have any voicemails? No. Let's just watch Eric July's video about video games

and his Palestine thing. Yeah, let's watch the Palestine one. Okay. What is this show he's on? It's like a big, like, political show. Is this a Blaze lady? Is this the Blaze? Yeah, it's gotta be the Blaze. Man, if there is one thing...

Did you see Alex Stein talked about us? Oh, he did? He had Nerd Rod... What'd he say? He said he had Nerd Rodic on. He was like, I don't know how I've gotten dragged into this. And I'm like, well, the reason you got dragged into it is because Eric July is freaking out about someone going to his business, and all you do is go to people's businesses and fuck

with them. Yeah, it's hilarious. Yeah. See, you're like, why are you not watching these clips? Dick, there's so many clips. Everyone's getting involved. Yeah, but Ethan Van Cyber had like a tearjerker man I watched I watched most of that stream

What do you think? Ethan has more. What do you call it? What's that word when you believe in something and you're not a fake He has more... Fuck, it's on the tip of my tongue. Like, genuine? That's close. He's a more genuine type person.

Like he believes in something. Integrity might be the word I'm looking for. That's not quite it, though, is it? Well, I'm going to use it. He has more artistic... Bonafide. Yeah, he's a more bonafide individual. Yeah, he has more artistic integrity, you're saying? He has more artistic... Bonafide. Yeah, he's a more bonafide individual. Yeah, he has more artistic integrity, you're saying?

He has more artistic integrity than I expected. Oh! That's not an insult. Sounds like one. No, because also... I have less artistic integrity than Ethan VanSkyver. Because if I was in a situation where I knew I was profiting by shutting my mouth, I would probably just go along with it.

Like, he was making money, you know, and he could have... Yeah, okay, so the guy's... Eric July clearly threatened Ethan into, like, not ignoring what we were saying. Yes. It's like saying, like, you better, like, defend me or else. Or else when I'm on stream, I won't defend you. Right.

Like no one's, what are you fucking talking about? That guy's the fucking king of independent comics. No one's going, who's going after, who needs you to defend? Eric, if I'm going. You've never made. If I'm going to the fucking electric chair and you show up as my lawyer, I'll shoot myself in fucking court. Yeah. Mushmouth.

Who needs you to defend anybody? Also, I can understand Ethan as a guy who's made hundreds of comics, a guy who's made two, coming to him and being like, listen, here's the way things are gonna be. I'd be like, oh, slow your roll, buddy. Okay. Uh, but still, I- He's so unnecessary.

I, you know, I saw him, you know, kind of, uh, pushing back against Eric Jelani, and I was like, yeah, but don't you have a good thing going? Aren't you making money off the back of this? Because, again, I have other guys who come Jelani. I was like, yeah, but don't you have a good thing going? Aren't you making money off the back of this? Because, again, I have other guys who come to me, and they're like, listen, I'm just making money off the back of this thing, so I can't really talk shit about it.

I said, yeah, I understand. Yeah, but they're not. I understand. I know that. I know they're also not. I know. I knew his game the whole time. It's just suck, suck, suck, take, take, take, take, take.

Never promote anything. Load your pay pig's throats up with shitty comics and plug it down until they fucking burst. That's the game plan. Because you see it in Hollywood all the fucking time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Promote me. Promote me. Never goes the other way. Never. Right. And I also

some of the stuff he says I don't know if we brought it up on this show, but he's got a big thing where he's like these guys are crowdfunding comics. I print my comics ahead of time. Crowdfunding is bad. And I'm like, well, all these guys are crowdfunding, and you're telling your audience that that model sucks and is bad and that you shouldn't trust people who crowdfund?

I'm like, and Ethan crowdfunds. Is that a tax thing? Because he's doing crowdfunding. Eric's doing crowdfunding. I've tried to explain that to people. Well, no, he's pre-ordering it. I'm like, yeah, that's most big companies. Because a crowdfund is, I think, is like a gift.

And a pre-order is, I know they're not the same thing. Yeah. For tax purposes, it's classified differently. Maybe. I'm guessing. Because it's not the same if you i don't know all tax situations are in regardless i'm like bro here's the thing you have the money to produce your comic up front and some other guys do as well if i wanted to print my comic ahead of time i could have it just would have been stupid. Mr. Moneybag. Shut up. He didn't need

any of the money after all. No, I want the money. Okay. I'm saying if I needed to, I could have done that. I wouldn't have wanted to. But, you know, there's some guys

who have to crowdfund. So don't say like, you know, I hate crowdfunding and, you know, it's stupid and you should just print the books and blow.

It's like, well, no, because now you're telling your audience to. The overall, the only, the most important takeaway from the whole thing is you have to criticize people. Yeah. Everyone needs to take criticism, not be open to it, but take it or else it's not going to get any better. And you can listen to criticism be like listen i don't agree with this and i don't agree with this but maybe this has some truth to it that's the thing is like i went back and listened to your review and there's like some very small inaccuracies right yeah where we said like uh at one point it was like who's mrs newman and there was like

some throwaway line that says she's like the mother of jasmine or something but the point is who like why is that important right well that But the point is who? Like, why is that important? Right, well, that's the thing is like that small thing does not discount the fact that- Try starting a new like- It doesn't have a plot. Try starting a parallel comedy economy and having nobody criticize anyone.

Just everybody be terrible. And nobody's laughing. No. And that's what the- And see how that goes. His entire focus was, well, because it contains this small inaccuracy, that means that it's obviously bad faith and can be completely discounted. And you're like, no, the overall points are still valid,

even if your confusing comic did not make it clear why he was searching for Jasmine. All right, let's watch this. And we had to infer a lot from one panel that somebody missed. It's a two-minute clip. This is, it's some, it's some wall-aged woman. Okay. And a gay guy and Eric July talking about what's happening. Wait, you said Eric July twice.

There's two Eric Julys? I'm confused. It's basically my dream team. If I wanted an analysis, a smart analysis of what's happening in the Middle East. Yeah. There's two Eric Julys? I'm confused. It's basically my dream team. If I wanted an analysis, a smart analysis of what's happening in the Middle East, I say, you give me a wall-aged woman, a gay man who's too excited to be there, and Eric July. That's what I want.

Feed me that analysis on the Middle East. Foreign relations correspondent Eric July. Yes. How many communications degrees do we have here? Three? That's what I thought. Hit me with it, people. Hit me with it. I'm excited.

Can you find America on a map? Something tells me no. All right, here. We have a right to respond. I just think that response in a time of war that they didn't ask for is much different than Hamas going in and specifically targeting innocent children. Well, again, what's going to happen is people are going to defend that action or speak, not even defense, it's more of speaking against, let's say, a reaction, because people are going to say, well, before that, they did this, and before that, that's how it always happens.

This is how it is, and I'm dealing with this, and I've dealt with this. But that's government. I'm dealing with this, and I've dealt with this. But that's government. Oh, God. I'm dealing with this. Can you imagine? Can you imagine? Can you imagine? That, uh, yeah. Can you imagine someone being like...

I'm dealing with this. Can you imagine? Yeah. Have you seen what's happening in Israel and Palestine? Well, I've been dealing with this. I've been dealing with this. I've been dealing with this. What do you think about this? What do you mean you've been dealing with this?

What do you think how Israel's like- What do you mean? Killing kids and they shut off all their power and like there's- Well, I've been dealing with a similar situation. Oh. Do you know, like you're, I mean you're black, do you have ancestors in like Africa? Like Rhodesia or something? Well, not exactly.

In Israel? Do you know people in Palestine or something? It's a similar type scenario. Do you know people in prison? I'm just reaching here because it's a horrible genocide that may or may not be happening and terrorism that may or may not be happening. What are you dealing with? I just see the bloodshed. I see the

horrible things that are happening. It really reminds me of what's going on with me specifically. Were you in 9-11? A personal 9-11, I would say. Really reminds me of what's going on with me specifically. Okay. Were you in 9-11? A personal 9-11, I would say. Oh, okay.

Very personal. And what is it? Well, have you heard of an individual named Riley? Yeah. Okay. That's a problem. 100%. Not innocent civilians.

I agree. I agree 100%. Well, you said institution against institution. Yes, that's exactly what it is. And I've dealt with this, and I think everybody here has. Oh, God. I've dealt with this. Dude, they're, like, trying to keep him on.

Like, they're having a conversation about global terrorism and, like, politics. And he's just, like, trying to wrestle the gator into talking about people taping money to his warehouse yeah and they don't even know it's like when you're in school and they tell you about how they're putting all the jews on trains to go to auschwitz and you go i've been on a train yeah oh thank you billy thank you for that insight my parents call it the nighttime train where i have to go brush my teeth and wash my face and then go to bed and my mom reads me a bedtime story usually like three bedtime stories i get to pick two of them um but i don't like it so i it is something we've we've all had to deal with it we've all had to deal with the train we know about

the train may not be called the night train for you but you've had some sort of nighttime vehicle experience so i think we can all identify he tries to say, like he realizes what he's doing is so dumb and tries to say, we've all dealt with that. We've all dealt with it. We've all dealt with this. Panicked. Here we go. That's how it always happens.

This is how it is, and I'm dealing with this, and I've dealt with this. But that's government problems. 100%. Not innocent civilians. I agree. I agree 100%. Well, you said institution against institution. Yes, that's exactly what it is.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I've dealt with this, and I think everybody here institution. Yes, that's exactly what it is. I've dealt with this, and I think everybody here has dealt with this on more of a micro level. It's a cultural thing. It's a micro level. And any event that someone feels, and people that follow me know where I'm going with this, I'm not going to bore anybody with the details

because I have my own experiences here. No, please bore me with the details. I really want you right now to bore me with the details of how your life is like the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. Please bore me with those details. I would love to be bored by that. Please, Eric. Please.

Eric, we got all the time in the world. I got all the time to be bored by the details of how your life is like an ongoing humanitarian crisis slash war. Genocide. Genocide. Okay, here. But what happens is that in the event that people have made up their mind that you are not to be liked, okay? Liked? Whether it be a person, individual person, type of person, no matter what.

Wait. Individual person, type of person, no matter what. Wait. Individual person, type of person. In the question of Israel and Palestine, when people have made up their mind that you are not to be liked, the big problem is that they don't like the Jews. Oh, yeah, or Israel. Israel doesn't like Hamas. It's a situation of liking someone

People have made up their minds People have made up their minds He's just so fucking stupid What is he doing? Why would you say this? Oh my god People who listen to my channel know what I'm talking about You're right and we know you should stop right now.

You should not make this comparison ever. Anything that you do is unjustified. Right. Anything that someone else does to you is to be justified. And, like, to your point, you worded it perfectly where you say, hey. How is he proud of himself? Look at him smiling about this. I'm an excellent metaphor smith.

I make a composed smith. Anything that you do is just anything that you do is unjustified. Eric, it's just not funny. Like you're just like ranting about murdering people because they taped bunny money into your warehouse. I mean, you said it would be justified to

kill a man, so people are reacting to that. It's not justified or not justified. If you're wondering why they don't like you, it might be your propensity towards murder at a minor slight that was delivered upon you. If I was black, I would not want this guy to be going around talking about murdering people

over a bunch of money taped to my door. It's not a bad, it's not a good look. Okay, here we go. You're just supposed to take it on the chin. That's the expectation it is that they have for people that they despise. Wait, wait, wait. Let me rewind a little bit. I really want that line, take it on the chin, to be heard in context of a festival being massacred and women being raped.

Everyone expects Israel to take the mass murder of hundreds of people on the chin. That's an argument that's been made. Just take it on the chin. That's an argument that's been made. Just take it on the chin. He's not talking about himself here. Anything that someone else does to you is to be justified. And like, to your point, you worded it perfectly where you say, hey, you're just supposed to take it on the chin. That's the expectation it is that they have for people that they despise.

Now, why they despise them, whatever. Is it because they were told? Is it because they were told? There's hate in their hearts. Okay, Eric, no one is telling you you have to take it on the chin. Just respond equally. When someone shows up at your warehouse

and puts money on your door, call them a fat F-sler and move on with your day. This is like a Palestinian child throwing a rock and an IDF soldier saying, I have every right to murder that kid. Yeah. And then going on TV and crying about how they couldn't,

but they should be allowed to do it and no one likes them. You have to respond equally, saying you're going to kill people because they made a joke in your parking lot, which was unused, by the way, that's not responding in kind. You can fire back. It's fine.

You're too dumb. And he did that thing. The biggest losers will always go, oh, I'm not going to give them attention. And then give them endless attention. You tried that. If you really weren't, you wouldn't say that. It could be a various, whatever they've made up their mind,

that anything that you do is wrong. Any reaction that you have is unjustified. But anything that someone else does to you, you had it coming. It was your fault, yada, yada, yada. I think a lot of us deal with this, but what we're seeing right here is this more out of like just a massive level. I'm not going to sit up here and pretend like what's happening in my life is the same as what's going on in Israel.

At least he walks it back a little bit. At least he puts a little disclaimer on it. What an idiot. Thank God. What a fucking idiot. I'm not going to sit up here and pretend like it's What an idiot. Thank God. What a fucking idiot. Uh, uh, well, I'm not going to sit up here and pretend like it's exactly the same, but that would be crazy. The similarities

are noteworthy. And, pal, that's not what it is that I'm saying. I'm saying that approach to the response that people have is similar, and it can be applicable really anywhere else. I can't believe you said applicable correctly. We have a right to respond.

They talk about shoes for a half hour after this. It's really amazing. Just, you wanted to kill a guy for putting money on your door. Yeah. You said that would be a self-defense situation. Okay. Got to respond equally. Guys, what a great show

I have to play one voicemail I gotta play an old one Man, I made a whole fucking bunch of them too God damn it Can't you search by date In this folder? I just didn't copy them over to my Dropbox, although I thought I did Well

Fuck! Hey guys, the biggest problem in the universe are those spam texts that you get. It's gone from emails to calls to now it's text messages. Oh, your package couldn't be delivered, or hey, how's it going? Can we meet up? I just- all these stupid spam texts just to get you to respond. Yeah, those kind of suck. And I have a solution, okay? Wouldn't you be okay with your funding of the military if you-

All right, all right, all right. This is fucking- I love when you shit on the voicemails. No, that was a great one. Spam texts. Good. It's on my computer. But now if we start doing super chats, it's too late to do the voicemails.

So I guess they're just- I guess all that effort is wasted. You can play them on the next show. Then they're too- Then they're late I guess all that effort is wasted You can play them on the next show then there are two then they're late It makes no sense Vito. Can you copy them over while I read through the super chats? But you don't want to do that and what we start doing it. Yeah, then it's it's already gone Well, what are you gonna do? It's my drop is my Dropbox running Yeah, shouldn't show sync history suggestions for Halloween?

Look, yeah, can't find it. What the fuck is going on, Vito? It's haunted. I don't know. My computer's haunted. We gotta get another computer. We need a separate station to pull things down. God damn it!

All right. Well, guys, I want to thank you all for listening to a great episode. How many people do I have watching real quick? Can you go to that tab? I feel like this is a big show. Big, big show. Thousand. We have over a thousand people watching. That's actually kind of a milestone. Who do you guys, uh... We normally,

I think the only other time we hit like a thousand is when we have Destiny here, so... Who do you guys want to hear more? Who knows more about the Middle East? Are you going to put me or Eric? Eric, July. Eric, July

or Ja Rule. Okay, there you go. Which one? Vote. Why'd you put a question mark next to Ja Rule? It's a question mark. It's a sentence. That's not how polls work. You don't make the poll a sentence. Guys, get those super chats in.

You know you want to support your favorite show. Biggest problem. Fuck, I fucked it up again. No, it's episode 111. That's what we're on, right? There you go. Right there.

Koof successfully obtains the first super chat of the night for two. He says, thank you all for not killing yourselves. Thanks. Thank you, Koof. Riley Edwards for five. If Vito loses the Vito loses weight challenge, you should have to dress up as Isom Knox for Halloween.

No. Red for two. What is the warehouse situation in Gaza like? Bad. Bad. Talk to Eric July about it, and he says it's basically the same. Warren for two. Next live show at Isom's grave.

Grave rave. Grave rave. Grave rave same. Warren for two. Next live show at Isom's Grave. Grave Rave. Grave Rave. Grave Rave! Turkey Sandwich for ten. Just wanted to get gay for a second and say, Vito, I genu- Hold on, this is going to be a trick. Say, Vito, I genuinely appreciate you and what you bring to the show.

Your sense of humor and ability to handle bullying makes the biggest problem in the universe reach its full potential. I'm surprised you did not try to slip a TBF in there. Thank you, sir. A genuine super chat? My God. How often do we get that? Jay Thompson for two.

Problem. Tim Sheridan's anti-anti-woke marketing. Guys, if you want to learn more about that. Tim Sheridan, who will not give us a review copy of Green Lantern, which is bullshit. Where's his grandparents buried? It's not our new thing? Every time a comic creator slights us. Oh, you didn't say it was.

You were just like, well, begrudgingly. I made a video about this situation. Guys, go to YouTube.com slash Vito2. That's V-I-T-O-T-W-O. Okay. To learn about how Tim Sheridan is picking a fight with the comics gay community and trying to get his gay Green Lantern into your home. Maybe you want it.

Lemon Trashy for two. Just wanted to get gay for a second and say Vito. Good joke. Jammis for ten. What is going on? I've never felt closer to you, Vito. Thank you for strengthening our parasocial relationship. The only way to be closer is to be inside. I'm reading these very closely because I feel like these are tricks. There's a trick in there.

LP Dirty Tea for two. I'm here for my weekly dose of racist intimidation. Dick, can I get a drumroll? Dick, can I get a drumroll? The big Avaxis for $100 on the board. Wow, thank you. Thank you, Avaxis. Fantastic. Hey, Vito, seems that the Jameson turned me into a whiskey prick.

So to make it up to you, I became a beast tier Vito-phile. I need to rename those tiers on my Patreon. But I have to stress, just because I'm a veto-attracted person, don't make that a meme, doesn't mean I'm prowling my local magic tournaments for vetoes to molest. Well, Avaxis, thanks for joining my Patreon. And if you're at the beast tier, you may have qualified for the veto plush doll, which will be the holiday gift. All you guys. I'm giving shit away.

It's free. All you got to do. Digital, man. You got to shed this fucking poisonous skin you wear. I'll give them a Vito NFT. How's that? You got to watch. What's that movie where they put all that shit on their labyrinth?

They're putting all that shit on their back and it's like weighing them down and breaking them. You know what I now figured out is, you know, there's a website where you can vote, you can bid on Japanese auction sites. Okay. And they like send it to their Japanese warehouse and then ship it out to you. So now I can buy even more garbage I don't need. You need, if there's like a meteor that hit your apartment, wiped all that shit out, that'd be the best thing that ever happened to you.

Well, at this point I might sell it all and just buy bonds based on the market. Torturous for seven Canadian dollars. I've never felt closer to you, Vito. As you slowly miss more and more weigh-ins, I feel your gravitational pull more and more. Okay. I think we're doing good. Riley is here. Give him a drum roll.

Young Clippa himself for $100. Wow. Says, let's all Pokemon go to the grave of Isomnox. All hail the Clippaverse from our good friend Young Clippa. Employee of the month

for, what was that, September 2023. Who's employee of the Month this month? Riley again. Well, somebody suggested it was the racist individual in the hockey mask. It's always Riley. It's always Riley. He's Employee of the Month every month.

Horse McGee for five says Israel. More like was real. Oh, those busty IDF girls are always welcome, though. I hate that PS psyop and meme maybe more than any other which one that israeli whenever they show the hot israeli girls in the army yeah i the sick the amount of sick that i feel is threefold i don't even know if i can say this on youtube. The hatred of them, the hatred knowing that it's a psyop, and then the absolute

self-loathing, sickening hatred that I feel for myself and everybody that it works on. It manifests in that. You know, we can all, how about those? Oh, man. I don't know, every time I watch those Wonder Woman movies, I'm like, it's a little bit hotter knowing Gal Gadot hates those Palestinians.

Yeah. This is, yeah, you're the target for that shit. Bunch of skinny girls. Gorgeous little Jewish goddess Gal Gadot. Anytime a bass gets blown up, I'm going to imagine that they're in there. Please, God, tell me that they at least have to sleep in the bass. I'm going to take a fan to her house and she can Krav Maga me into the ground anytime. Laying Steel for five Australian dollars says,

My name is Vito Giswaldi and I love red delicious apples. They are not mealy. They are back. Wow, I didn't know you felt that way. Mysterious Ways for a thousand sneaky dollars says, I can't believe they think he actually peed on the stone. That's a grave accusation. That guy's calling into my show on Sunday.

That's a good one. He wants to defend himself. Yeah, because he didn't pee on the grave. It's a stupid thing to say. It doesn't... Have you seen urine ever in your life? It doesn't appear in a small... It leaks everywhere.

I just pee a little bit out and then shut it off right away. Yeah, shut it off immediately. No drips. Fun. Big Brian, GG for five. Got my super chat in

before last call. Eric July Saga is the best. Hope his game is accessible. Keep up the jokes. He says his game is going to be very accessible. No, he says his game is not going to be accessible.

Didn't he? That he's not worrying about accessibility in his game. I'm glad. So Big Brian has not actually watched the bonus episode yet because we haven't posted it, but he did pick up on the fact that Eric July

does not know how to pronounce accessible and says multiple times in his video, I don't want the game to be too accessible. He's playing it up. I don't know. It's a minstrel show, man. I'm telling you guys. How do you not know the word accessible?

He's just playing that Plymouth he didn't know. He's a mush mouth. It isn't really engaging, and you can kind of sleep through it. Before we even get to build out the game, we start with the combat and general gameplay loop. This is him describing the rip-averse video game. The game plays, not the other way around. We're not going to create a game and then say, oh,

people got to actually play it. Can we pause it for a second? So he made an entire video about the video game he wants to make, but the entire video is just him bitching about other video games. This man... No, no, no, no, no, no. It's about... It's him bitching about

video game design philosophy. It's not about... He's like... Design philosophies he does not understand. He was like, I want to make it an MMO, but I hate MMO combat.

And, you know, it always feels like, you know, this. It feels stiff and whatever. I want to make it jam-packed. I want to make it... Yeah, I want to make it super fun and expat. You can't because it's-packed. Yeah, I want to make it super fun and ax-packed.

You can't because it's on a server with 100 players, and you need to be able to issue the servers very simple commands, like my character is walking from point A to point B, and in the middle of that they will swing their sword once. You can't do a fluid action MMO because the server would fucking explode. Or you would just see other people's characters warping around as the computer tries to figure out where they're going but then has to constantly revise it back because

they changed their action midway through. You don't... You're over-explaining it. This is a 12-year-old going, I don't understand why they don't just make an online Devil May Cry with a thousand characters. Everybody would like it. Yeah. Because you fucking can't do... There's not enough bandwidth to do that. You don't have

infinite bandwidth, you retard. Like, you don't understand how video games work so don't spend all- You're picking on, like, the most technical, like, autistic point. Because it's- Of a technical limitation. He's way dumber than that. I know. He's got, like, you're, like, obsessing about this simple server

limitation when he's saying stuff that's way stupider. He's every guy on the internet who goes, I just don't know. This game looks like it was made in Unity. And you go, what does that mean? What are you talking about? What do you mean it looks like it was made in Unity? I don't know what that.

I've never heard that. There's people who think that the graphics of a game depend on the engine that you use. And it's like, no, a game, games made engine that you use yeah and it's like no a game games made in unity can have completely different fucking now if you're saying they're using stock assets but whatever it's just one of these stupid arguments that people know nothing about game design yeah i worked in the video game industry you're making it look good yeah fair enough play loop everything extends from how the game plays, not the other way around. We're not going to create a game and then say, oh, people got to actually play it.

So just that part. He doesn't know anything about video games. Everything extends from the way it's played. We're not going to make a game and then say, oh, people have to play it. Just say, I don't know anything about video game development. I would really enjoy making an MMO. Yeah. When you start making statements about here would really enjoy making an MMO. Yeah. When you start making statements about, here's what's wrong with MMOs,

is that I want them to perform in technical ways that are literally impossible given the current technology and available processing power of machines, that's when it's like, okay, so you're stupid. Shut up. You don't know how to make video games. So just say, I would like to make an RPG starring Isom. It would be a fun quest. Well, here's what I'm thinking for a combat system.

I'd like this to be a mini fighter of sorts. This would very much be a controller-driven game, but I have some ideas. Controller-driven game. Have they ever tried that? CDG. It's a classic industry term. Controller- driven game?

Sure He wants to make an online brawler Starring You make your own superhero It's a controller driven game Don't think you know More about his vision Is he writing these scripts for himself?

I have no idea Who could possibly write this? I want to hear about his controller-driven game. About input options, too. We'll talk about that in a bit. Marvel's Avengers was a game that failed because it did exactly what I said not to do

or it would fail. But the one with the inequality was its combat system and its setting. What I mean by that is that we got to see a true live response combat system with heroes varying in their powers. I imagine for our game, it would be a mix of that with maybe even a hint of Dragon Ball Xenoverse. He's a 12-year-old child. Like, that's it. It's listening to a 12-year-old go. It failed because exactly what I said.

That's exactly what I said. That's why I said it would fail, because they did. I want to make a video game that's like Spider-Man plus Goku. Mario 2. Pinball. Pinball. Put a, yeah.

Also. Contra. Fuck it. Put a, yeah. Also, quarters. Throwing quarters at the wall. Everybody play that. The important thing is it's a controller driven game

that is not accessible to everyone. The point is it's live response and I don't want it to be a button masher. I want there

to be combos when it comes to melee that's based on both the button combinations and the timing when i say live okay so i know the technical shit is like pissing you off but the reason that mmos have very simple like three hit combos is again you can't feed that many inputs into the

system when a game has like 100 players because each of them has to see what you're doing at the same time. I know. You're just explaining stuff that's so far beyond. It's like you're mad at a child for not understanding. Listen to how he describes a combo. It depends on the buttons and also the timing. We've only now discovered. Look up rollback netcode.

We finally figured out how to make fighting games work online. and those are video games that are one-on-one uh-huh and that address the problem of the computer can't possibly know what you're doing so it has to guess and if it's wrong it will then roll it back slightly with minimal lag look up rollback netcode watch a video on it it's very interesting and we've only now figured that out for two-player fighting games. He's gonna correct you. You wanna put that in a hundred-player MMO. It's not at that point. And it probably never will be unless we

somehow achieve the gift of infinite bandwidth, and we will not achieve infinite bandwidth in our lifetimes. He could be the Elon Musk of online games. You can't have a complex fucking combo system in an mmo because it will just i know i'm getting too technical it's just infuriating to hear guys who know nothing about video game development being like the problem is the video game studios are lazy and it's like no

it's not laziness it's not a lack of your brilliant foresight it's literal technical limitations that you do not understand because you are not a programmer. Bunt, I mean that there's going to be an obvious skill gap because of the reaction speed. So that means a very thoughtful weave and dodge mechanic. That's going to be key.

With the primary gameplay, I like the characters to have two main stances, if you will. A general stance, which will allow them to freely aim and target whatever their character is facing. And then a fight stance, which not only allows the user to focus on one enemy, but it would also change

the combinations and moves that are available to you. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Did you ever think of anything like that in games? So I used to know this kid, this Hispanic kid named Johnny. He loved video games. Right. And he reminds me very much of Eric Gillespie. One time I got roped into playing. What did he ride to

school? He had a moped. Oh. I mean, I knew him from the card store. Was it a normal size moped? We didn't go to school together. He rode a normal-sized moped. Eric July reminds me of this guy because at one point we played a

tabletop RPG, like a Dungeons & Dragons type thing, but it was a superhero universe. Clicks? I forget what it was called. It was like Super Powers the RPG. Everybody says their character. One guy's like, well, my guy's kind of like Superman, but he's just got his powers. He's And, you know, one guy's like, well, my guy's kind of like Superman,

but he's just got his powers and, you know, he's figuring it out. And the other guy's like, oh, my guy's, you know, a speedster. He's very fast. We get to Johnny

and he goes, my guy is like, you know, like Trunks from Dragon Ball Z and he has like a sword on his back and the sword

is like invincible and also he's invincible. Like, you can't hurt him at all. He can shoot fireballs and he's got a special gun and he's got a magic motorcycle that can jump. And again, you can't hurt him at all.

He's the most powerful. Sounds cool. And the only thing that can hurt him is gold. The only way to hurt him is with gold. With gold. And the dungeon master, my buddy Seth, was like, so you made a character who can't be hurt by anything unless it's gold. The only way to hurt him is with gold. With gold. And the dungeon master, my buddy Seth, was like, so you made a character who can't be

hurt by anything unless it's gold? He's like, yeah, yeah. And so he can't be hurt either. He can't be hurt by anything unless it's gold. And then he spent the DM for the rest of the campaign. He'd be like, you're fighting against a villain. He has a gun. And then Johnny would be like, what kind of bullets in the gun?

He'd go, golden bullets. He's like, fuck, I'm screwed again. Every villain had a golden weaponry for the rest of the campaign. I see. And that's Eric describing his video game and his characters. It's like a 12-year-old child just being like, he's going to have a fighting stance and then like a regular stance. And then like sometimes you do like a cool combo.

And there's all these combos, man. But then you got to dodge sometimes. Right. What's the story? Well, he's got a sword that you can't break. And also he doesn't like being disrespected and he hates security guards, man. There's all these security guards coming at you, man. And if Johnny's listening, Johnny, I love you.

But that was the stupidest character I've ever encountered. You've got to charge up your respect. You kill the security guards and collect their respect, and then you charge up your respect meter. And you collect respect points. And then you can fly. It's a man with endless ideas. Then you can go in the club.

The man who never runs out of ideas, Eric July. Because this would basically change that game into like a 3D fighter. This is where I'd imagine some of the PvP could exist. Balancing that would be one hell of a challenge, however. And that's where Xenoverse lacked. But my idea to address accessibility concerns would be in the gameplay and the class system. Though melee type of combat, that's going to be where most people gravitate towards. I can think of a few other options. I want as much variety as we realistically can have without much of a meta.

Easier said than done, I know. Your developers are going to kill you. Your game developers are going to be like, I mean, not for you. You don't do anything. You'd be like, okay, so you want a 3D brawler that then transforms into a side scrolling whatever the fuck and then becomes a fighting game. Let's get the stance down.

Write it. I want a Zelda game where every time I complete a dungeon, it sucks my dick, but I'm not making a video about it because it's moronic. I've often thought that I would want a little bit of porno in the game, but then I think about it in practice, and I'm like, eh, I don't know. I think that would ruin it. Some Japanese games do it. Well?

We talked about on here, I need a copy of Steam Hearts for the Sega Saturn. Hmm, okay. Though I think the Sega Saturn version has, I don't know if it has the porn stripped out or not. I just don't think it would be, I don't it would be... I think it would make it worse. Usually it's a gimmick. Do you ever play the Senran Kagura games? No. Those are games where you're female ninjas

and every time you beat up other ninjas, their clothes fall off. If they punch you enough times, your clothes fall off. That's weird. They're pretty hot. They got big old bitties on them. Okay.

The games are not that tight, but if you want to knock a lady's clothes off. They have a pinball game, too, where you hit them with pinballs until their clothes fall off. Hmm. I'll give it a shot. Give it a shot. Wet Bandit for five. Why is Isam Nock's grave so accessible? Are there no gates?

I guess not. John Riffs for five. No wishes for Riley and Vito's death. Not Chris Chan, though. Oddly enough, she's an actual sex criminal. Rapist. Well, Chris Chan has denied the allegations against themselves. Lemon Trashy for two.

Today, Noel said he's going to review Ice. Oh, okay. Oh, I can't wait to see how great and made it is. I'm sure he's going to say it's great. And then we're just overreacting. Yeah. Wait, I have a Noel clip, too. Okay.

I better have that. You got a couple of them. Oh, yeah. There got a couple of them here. Oh, yeah. There's a ton of Null. Null is just... I saw his clip where he didn't even know. He's like, yeah, it's his grandfather who he was really close to. Yeah, here it is.

Here's that one. Yeah. Yeah, he named his book after his grandfather. And then when people found out that he has a really close relationship with his grandfather, one of the dicks showed people... That's wrong. Null is incapable of getting a single fact

right. And I don't know why that is. And you can just qualify your statements with I don't really understand what's going on. Here's what I believe is happening, but I could be wrong. And if you did that, you't think that gets as many super chats No

As just saying That you had a close relationship Making up in your head Yeah That's the thing That comes out of nowhere Yeah No one has ever said

Eric had a close relationship With his dead great great grandfather Like you made that up in your head Yeah That is not And he does that a lot Yeah Is he'll take a situation

and he'll go, I'm pretty sure that guy said that Eric and his grandfather were really tight. It's like, no, you came up with that. Who said that? Only you.

Constantly, he invents new information and he's sure that he's heard it somewhere else. It's really weird. All right, here we go. Yeah, he named his book

after his grandfather and then when people found out that he has a really close relationship with his grandfather one of the dick show people went over to the headstone and it looked like he pissed on it it doesn't look like that at all

cause he didn't wait a minute oh wait a minute let's see what let's see what Null thinks looks like he pissed on it is. Okay. Yeah. That? That's the piss? There's another piss.

Does anybody have the picture Null's talking about where he looks like he pissed on it? Apparently there was like some grass clippings that he moved so they're like ended up being like some grass clippings on the grave or something i forget if they were already on the grave and then he moved them because uh that's not but that's the old pic that's not the picture from the day he was there okay let me see that's just how it appeared i'm pretty sure i was joking about it on Twitter because it's so fucking stupid Guys nobody pissed on a grave And if they did we would say please don't piss on a grave. Don't piss on graves

That's probably illegal posing in front of it with a stuffed bunny rabbit and a turtle is in you know Harmless it does nothing. I don't really care about pissing on graves, but it's probably illegal here we go. Yeah Yeah, okay. Here's the piss. Here's the legendary piss Somebody's and somebody zoomed in they're like well if you just look at the full picture. It's clear that it's grass It's like no it's not grass. There's a shadows. No. I'll tell you exactly what it is okay? I know exactly what it is Here is the let me save it so I can bring it up. This is the grave of Isom. Which someone is being accused of.

And maybe I'll save this one, too. But that picture is not from the same day. That's just the generic... Well, you know what, Vito? It's still... I'm going to bring it up anyway. I get why. Okay.

Turns out that moisture exists in a lot of scenarios. Okay. So, let's bring up Exhibit A. One more thing. So, this is the Kiwis, or I guess Null, I don't know who, saying that a grave has been micturated upon in our fair city. Right. Here is the piss stain.

Which is not in the shape of any piss stain I've ever seen in my life. Not dripping down the side at all like liquids tend to do. Have you ever pissed that much? My dog will piss when I take her out and she wants to mark every inch of territory. By the time we get back to the house, that's about how much piss she has left in her. mark every inch of territory. By the time we get back to the house, that's about how much piss she has left in her. Have you ever pissed on a flat surface and have it remain perfectly

on that flat surface without any drops slowly sloping? On this perfect, obviously this hundred-year-old gravestone is a perfectly flat surface. Or splattering on the side like the toilet.

Noel, do you sit down when you piss? Is that why you don't know what happens in the physics of a piss when someone pisses? Could that be the problem? How come none of this is wet? How come like a normal piss, it didn't start out like a little tiny bit of piss and then work itself up into a full piss and then die down? Why is it all directly there like he's shooting a bullseye at a womp rat? If I could perfectly center my piss the way that this man has, clearly. He stood over the gravestone, pissed straight down.

He said, oh god, I gotta piss a little bit to the left to really balance it out. Now, I'm gonna go ahead and fill all the retards in Null's audience in with a little bit of forensics detective work. You can see right here where you've expertly circled the piss. Thank you for that. We wouldn't have been able to identify it without your expert CSI. There's piss on it! Where? Yeah, where?

Right here. What are you talking about? Right there. Oh, thanks for the CSI cross-section. We can see that there's? Right here. What are you talking about? Right there. Oh, thanks to the CSI cross-section. We can see that there's a crack here that goes all the way down. Now, perhaps he pissed an acid piss or an earthquake piss. Right, that eroded its way through the stone. Instantly.

Yeah. Or perhaps. A predator type or an alien type situation. Perhaps water has been condensing on the freezing cold stone every morning and puddling in a microscopic, microscopic area of indentation

on the gravestone that over the years, over the 100 years that it's been sitting there in the exact same spot in wherever it is, has worn its way down. Gradually freezing, unfreezing,

expanding until it slowly, very slowly eroded a crack in the granite. Wow. And that's what you're seeing. Maybe. Just maybe. It happens to be normal moisture. On a tombstone. I've been to graveyards and that morning dew

is out there Yeah And then here's the Here's a picture of it on a completely different day right Yeah So this is the picture that was brought up from Whatever the grave stone searching Site is

Yeah And wow Would you look at all that piss That just naturally occurs on it Throughout the day You see all that grass All around Smart guys

Grass needs water So either they're watering their shit Or water is just as naturally there Right Wearing its way down Through the grave You don't think that it's naturally Being pissed on by

Maybe the gravekeeper Comes by every day And pisses on it Gives it a good piss. Fucking I some knocks. He mentioned, like, he teased that he would shit on it or something. I don't know what the fuck he did. He never said he was going to shit on it.

That's ridiculous. Never. In fact, he was, like, a really nice guy. He cleaned it. Yeah, he was like, oh, guys, please don't fuck around with it. And also, I feel kind of bad about how bad the cemetery looks. Maybe we can donate them some money and like help them out And yeah, it's like a really nice guy. Yeah, it's like I just went there cuz I'm a fan of the show

And I wanted to like take a picture There was like a big wet stain on the head some that's not present in other photos of it So yes, it is. We just look okay. Wait, let's see where that not present in other photos Fucking moron you dumb piece of shit., there is grass all around the tombstone. How do you think it got there, buddy? A girlfriend? No. We're going to keep saying it.

One push-up. One push-up, no. You've got to get a life. Give us one push-up, buddy. I know you've got one push-up in you, man. Come on. You're addicted to not doing push-ups. I don't know what country you're hiding from extradition or whatever.

They have push-ups in that country. They probably do. And if you just get a woman and you love her right, you'll get all this insane out of your fucking head. Don't get a woman. It's going to make things worse. Trust me. I've been with women my whole life.

My life's terrible. Focus on science and cis-admitting, but just do a push-up. All right, here. Play poured something on it. It's just really fucking gross, man. Yeah. It's really gross that people are like this. I still don't fucking get it.

I understand that Eric July feeds something on it. It's just really fucking gross, man. Gross, man. It's gross. It's really gross that people are like this. I can't believe it. It's gross. They're doing gross things.

Guys. I have really strong ethics, and it is just it's gross That a man would show up and take a picture of the naturally occurring Moisture hold on I have to make sure I have to make sure Chris Chan's mentally Mentally incapable porn is still being hosted correctly. Okay. Can I get back to the... It's really... It's gross. Ryan. It's so gross.

I need to make sure all these legitimately mentally ill individuals are properly documented Hold on, I have to make sure these anonymous people are appropriately moderating underage revenge porn. A wink. All right? It's just gross. I just want... I don't know.

There's no way to make. It's like a sorority girl. There's no way to make Noel live in reality. It's not possible at this point. He's too far gone. I think at one point he might have existed in the realm of reality, but it's just like when you're just on the internet that long and you never, you never, you isolate and you never see another real person. And you sit around.

Because they're all pedophiles. Right. You can't associate with real people. Okay. Well, whatever accusations you want to make, that's your call. I just think that. People, all people. Probably.

Anything I ever see from Kiwi Farms these days, I go, these people are living in a paranoid fantasy. Yeah. And it's a very. I understand. Slur, slur, slur, slur. days i go these people are living in a paranoid fantasy yeah and it's a very weird i understand i understand the paranoid fantasy is very fun like it's more interesting than your actual life man same way for q anon it's very interesting to assume yeah that there's a secret plot yeah that secretly people are conducting piss raids on old black men's graves. And you're exposing the truth. And you're putting shame to these people.

At the end of the day, a fan of a podcast went to it and took a selfie. Yeah. In front of a grave. Yeah. No one was hurt. Well, he literally touched grass. He literally touched grass. I guess that's the real issue.

I don't fucking get it. I understand that Eric July feeds the trolls just a little bit. You wouldn't know anything about having a website that endlessly tries to get people to engage with trolling for

content. A little bit. I mean, I get that he doesn't get it, but all the other stuff is engage with trolling for content. A little bit. I mean, I get that he doesn't get it, but all the other stuff is just like made up nonsense. It's fine to not think it's funny that like there's an internet beef and that you like, for some reason,

I have a weird thing with me and Nick, but it's this constant making up stuff that's weird. It's the, I don't like this guy. Have you ever heard of bitch eating crackers syndrome or whatever? Uh-uh. The idea where if you hate someone, no matter what they do, you will find a way

to be upset about it. Like Israel and Palestine. Exactly. As Eric was explaining. So if you see someone you hate eating crackers, you go, look at that fucking bitch eating those crackers. Where at the end of the day, it's like, yeah,

but you eat crackers. Like, it's not a big deal. Yeah. All right. Because he, he does like instantly give these people attention and I wish he would fucking starve them out. Why?

But even funny, it's like nobody on the forum did shit like this to, uh, to people. And okay. Taking a picture. It's like nobody on the forum did shit like this to people. Okay. Taking a picture. It's not funny. It's the reason.

It's not funny. You're right. It's not funny. The reaction is funny. I mean, who's a professional comedian? Who is currently podcasting to a thousand people who all seem to think it's pretty funny. It's not funny. It's not funny.

I mean, anytime people are guffawing with laughter and somebody goes, well, that's not funny, it's usually that person's dead right. And I would know a lot about comedy because I ran fundraisers for a man who raped his mother. Okay, well, good work, Noel. No one on the forum would do that?

Take pictures at a gravestone? Do your internet show. You can poke fun at lolcows. I get it. I think that's kind of what we're doing. It's kind of the same thing, but sure. What we're doing is bigger, actually. It's more fun than what he's doing. Just endless kvetching and moralizing.

I just, nobody on the forums would ever do something of this. This is the most horrible thing that's ever happened. You guys tricked Chris Chan into getting a sex change. What do you mean? Wow. I'm sure he won't take responsibility for that. I don't care, but that's what you did. Okay. I know. We're the worst people who ever existed, and Kiwi Farms

is a bastion of morality and truth. Somebody said on there, somebody said, I never go on, but somebody posted it. Somebody always posts the hits. Somebody said, I just hate that Dick's getting away with it. Yeah. Well, you know what?

Tell the cops that someone we don't know went to a gravestone and took a picture and see what they tell you. So, Null says he's going to review I, Some. I'm sure he's going to say he likes it because he has to. Because again, he hates us. No one can see what's coming next. Oh, man. It's bitch reading comic syndrome. He goes, he hates us. No one can see what's coming next. Oh, man. Bitch reading comic syndrome. He goes, look at these

assholes reading a man's comic. Well, we have that right. Black Angus reviews for two. I thought you were not going to say naked. Lord of the Kino for two. Love me, sniper thought. AI apologies to dab on haters. Yeah, I think she had AI write that stupid apology note. That's awesome.

Which she didn't need to read. Lloyd Llewyn for $14.99, Australian. Tried talking to Eric about his fallout with Nick Ricada and all he did was pretend not to know who I was talking about and would obsess over particular words I used like an autistic.

He does that to everyone. That's a gangbanger thing. That's not an autistic. Don't try to... He's a criminal. Don't try to... Don't forget that. Anyone who tries to have a conversation

with Eric July, I just tell them, if you say one thing, if you say like, you said Isom was good, he'll say, I never said Isom was good. Yeah. That's his response to everything.

It's because he's raised by a woman, so the way he deals with everything is like a woman would. Yeah. Demanding 100%. You can't characterize his statement. He doesn't understand the idea of characterizing a statement, being like, well, that was generally the idea of what you were going for right, but I never said that yeah like that's a woman thing I sounds like a kind of like a detective story. I never said it was a detective story. Okay. Well yeah I mean it is you know whatever don't don't try to engage that man. Honestly. It's impossible wet bandit for five

That's an awesome shirt dick is wearing if only biggest problem had merch I'm going to get that set up. Hold the Truth Hostage for two in good faith. Prayers to the Isom Graveyard. Tourism is up 100%. That is a 100% factual truth. When is the last time someone went to the grave of Isom Knox? He's a celebrity.

Tourism is up 10,000%. Yeah. Synapse for $20 Australian dollars. I'd much prefer you being low energy than crying, Vito. Thank you for not killing yourself much love Well there you go You don't have to do either Shut up I drank a nice coffee today I'll drink coffee

Cullen Cara for five The biggest part or the best part about Shad is his brother Jazza is an actual artist with a massive art channel And actually busts his ass to make cool stuff Yeah I checked out his channel He knows what human anatomy looks like Yeah Shad is like the Danny DeVito and the twins thing. Yes. Or the stuff that ran out of the pussy.

Ran down the side of your mother's leg. Yeah. Abtus, I saw him for 10 GBPs. I'm an independent journalist for Ripaverse News and the Avery Knox Foundation. I was considering doing a story on the successful campaign for the Superkiller comic. I look forward to hearing from you. Wow, a journalist is reaching out. Sam Coyne for five.

Hey, Trevor. I bought a Super Chat for Biggest Problem. I don't know why. DBF, I just wanted to say hey, though. Dick and Vito, I love the show. Thanks. P-Tong for five. Every week you're not banned is a good week for my ear holes. Thank you. LP Dirty T for two. Stranger Danger created a generation of dummies. Stranger Danger.

That's what I'm calling it. Stranger Danger. Thank you, LP Dirty T. J-Lo for two GBPs. Hey, I love you guys. Keep up the jihad. Jihad. Is that euros or is that pounds?

I think it's pounds. So that's like five bucks. Beach Hook for five. Up until three days ago, Jack Films had his home address listed on his LLC, but according to the mob, that's not him doxing himself. Yeah, you could just Google his address. It's stupid. Clap chapter of the Destroyer for ten says, happy birthday, Vito.

Cool. Had it is my birthday. Happy birthday. Give me birthday super chats. I deserve them. CG for five. Shocked with reaction of the sniper wolf. These terminally online people would get PTSD from a phone book.

Didn't even happen on YouTube. It was Instagram. Yeah. Reporter to Meta. No. Reporter to YouTube. Danny Fist for five. I wish for Vito to finish his comic and be less fat.

I don't think I'll get my wish. You get one. You get one. Pick. Melissa Baker for five. Happy belated birthday, Vito. Hope your next year is the best yet. Yeah. I think it will be.

Fox Foley for a big ten. I agree with you about the doxing thing, Vito. I think these people are acting intellectually disabled, too. But BF about it, though, and remember that Zoomers can't handle the confrontation. I'm on to you. Alclevech for two. Happy girth day, Vito.

Fuck you. That's a free Mountain Dew. Kch for two. Happy girth day, Vito. Fuck you. That's a free Mountain Dew. Koo for two. Happy birthday, Vito. Thank you for not killing yourself. Wet Bandit with the bunnies and the turtles. And another thing we're ignoring. Jose M for two.

Shad M. Brooks is the Eric July of AI-backed drawing. He is bad. The Redback for five. Australian. They should just charge people to use them at night like any other parking station. Sure. Yeah, put up a pay station. CG for five.

Vito's problem is regulation for parking lots. Anything. I don't care. Is that a Quicksilver too? Happy birthday day, Vito. Sarah Gardner for five Australian. Oh, come on, Dick. Where's our fun?

What else would you want your money spent on, really? You know what? If people would die in it, I'd be more for it. But it's this drone shit and just like shelling buildings and stuff that I, that should be not allowed. War crime. You've been watching the grenade dropping videos though? I don't like those.

I don't like video game shit. You feel bad. Pigeon saw for five. Avoid the deodorant scrapes and use gel. I do use gel gel but if it's too far down the edges scrape well never mind please vote down this horrible problem

Dusty settle for two says you need to be fair Eric doesn't remember the phone book that's a classic move black and white works for your comics art style it looks good in black and white but I think the customer demands killing whatever Joe Ray for ten happy birthday Vito may you always find a parking spot It looks good in black and white, but I think the customer demands Kelly. Whatever.

Joe Ray for 10. Happy birthday, Vito. May you always find a parking spot. Turtles. PW Project for two. Super Killer checks in on his hospitalized girlfriend, Miss Carrie. And then we can do the classic loss. That would be good if he has to burst in and kill the baby before the other guy shows up.

Yeah. Okay, that's actually pretty good. Especially down the stairs. If we show that Superkiller is responsible for the death of the Control-Alt-Delete baby. You better do it. Beardhair Flosser for Big Ten. Hi, Dick and Vito. Take my money.

I've already taken my laughs. This week, I learned Eric's favorite band is Sum 41. Don't you lose your N-word usage card for that? Yes. Maybe Papa Isom could comment. Not for 10 bucks. Okay. Is Eric July half white?

Well, they're saying that Avery Knox was. The historical graveyard thing is. That would explain his enjoyment of Sum 41. Yeah. Because all white boys love the Sum. I was a big Sum guy. Yeah. Summer of Sum, as we called it.

Clap tap into Destroyer for five. Says you forgot Jet Force Gemini. Garbage game. Fox Foley for five regarding the coloring comment. People are really open to black and white thanks to the rise of manga. Don't be a biatch. Exactly. Stop making me go over this in my head.

Pop Quiz for five. Super Smash Brothers. Terrible game. Logan HS for five. Vito, did you know in LA you can park in yellow loading zones after 7pm and all day on Sundays? Yes, I did know that. Dayman for $2.22. Roll on deodorant. Makes my pits crazy itchy.

Get the spray. Mega Harv for 5 Canadian. The hidden ice arrows in Gerudo Valley not being a weakness for the Twinrova boss in the Spirit Temple is the most poorly thought out part of Ocarina of Time. I'm just gonna agree. LP Dirty Tea for 2. Says a girlfriend plus an

N64 controller with a rumble pack equals a squirting emoji. Dominic. Were you getting your girlfriend off? Were you playing video games? I guess so. Dominic for five says we hit 1,000 viewers. Yes, finally. That is a milestone. Guys,

one thing you can do is hit that like button. It does I believe boost the algorithm, makes more people find the show, but we keep on growing strong. Thanks to all our supporters we love you common cure for five you know you conveniently left out that the ps1's lack of a depth buff depth buffer made all the textures warp and bend like a funhouse mirror that is a uh error in the architecture that uh many emulators have solved but yes and you know what

it gives it a certain charm rusty shacky Shackleford for $10. Did you guys see that vid of the Saudi guy saying, BB should have eradicated the Palestinians when he had the... Do we need to really get deep into the Jew killing whatever the fuck? I didn't know the Saudis were so into genocide. That's not what this comment is about. Wait, what is it about? It's about genociding the other guys.

Who is BB? BB.? B.B.? Netanyahu? Is that what they call him, B.B.? Is that what they call him, B.B.? I have no idea. It means like grandpa in whatever, Yiddish. Okay, so should I read this again? There's a video of a Saudi guy, B.B.,

saying B.B. should have eradicated Palestinians. Biggest problem, a thousand years strong. Yeah. Dayman for 555 Australian, the N64 is fine and dumb. Terrible take on Ocarina of Time. No, you're an idiot. And then he goes on to say, I'm an idiot, and I'm dumb, and I have bad opinions on video games, and I should jump

off a building in Minecraft. Thank you, Dayman. Jacob Ritchie for five says, I have to agree Vito. N64 is overrated, but had some fun games. PlayStation had that enormous library. Siphon Filter was fucking dope, which reminds me I have a present for Tony from Hack the Movies that I have to remember to send him. Tony loves Siphon Filter. Did you know that?

Yeah. We played it. He has an entire series of people playing that dog shit video game. Go watch my episode. I just rip on him the whole time and tell him why Metal Gear Solid is better. Longbow for $40 for $5 says, Get a job, Crim. Get a job, Crim.

PW Project for $2. Dreamcast and Saturn deserve more love. N64 equals trash. I love these super chats. On the John for $5 Canadian. Richard, are you still going to review that LGBT DC comic you were asking for earlier? Also, the only thing worse than spray-on is the gel deodorant. I have the gel.

I guess. I mean, if someone sends me a link to it. That guy blocked us all. He doesn't even want us to read it. Yeah, it just kind of seems like. Yeah, sure. Send it to me. I'll look at it.

Go watch my video about it so you know what he's talking about. Red for five says, hopefully Nina Infinity doesn't go in public because she might get slain by a mythical hero on an epic quest. Hopefully. It's possible he would see that goblin woman and want to slay her for the gold that lives inside her. That's why Nina Infinity has to stream inside because every time she goes outside adventurers

are trying to behead her. It's gross that you guys are talking about that. It's just gross that they're being so rude to that woman. It's gross that they're so mean. LoganHS for five. Vito, I hope you still like the Japanese Mario Kart bundle I gave you with the exclusive controller. At least N64 has lasted for 20 years solid state. I do like it, and thank you.

That was a very cool gift. As I said, Mario Kart is one of the six good games on the N64. And every console has something like i just the the endless fawning over it it's like it's one of the best consoles ever made it's like not even the top 10 best consoles where do you hear this this uh stuff talking about video games they're also obsessed with the gamecube there's a lot of like. I mean about blockchains being in competition and stuff. And trilemmas. Not like Mario's.

I don't know. That's what I read about. Brandon Robles for five. Vito, you're a land whale in Johto. I don't know what that means. Pokemon Johto League. Oh, okay. I'm in the Johto League.

No, Johto's spelled J-H-O-T-O. Land whale? I don't think they... Is that a thing? Is that in the game? Yeah'm in the Johto league. No, Johto's spelled J-H-O-T-O. Landwhale? I don't think they... Is that a thing? Is that in the game? Yeah, see? Johto. Well, that's Wailord. I don't know if that's exactly what he's referring to. Is this it? Can we not look up Pokemon that are whales to compare me to them? Okay.

Is that necessary? Robin Turner for 10 Canadian. Hey guys, could you play a short clip called Hila Klein IDF style? It's really funny. This doesn't sound funny. Send it to us on Twitter and we'll review it for the next show. Pigeon Saw for 5. Eric July stands alone against the Billion Bunny

Jihad. He's fighting his own personal war. Jack Telliam for 2. Used game stores in LA are the biggest problem. They're mostly bad. Game Realms is okay. Game Dude used to be fantastic, but all the prices now suck. Jay Thompson, 1327 for five. Yellow Flash will not read super chats that mention Masterson on his streams.

Oh, really? Because he's a bitch. And he knows he's a bitch. And I'm going to fight him in real life. In Minecraft. Oh, you pussy. I don't know what I'm allowed to say on YouTube. Let's call me something else then.

Super chat him and then we'll use a different name. Just call him Bugs. Come up with the names of the popular rabbit characters. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like, what was Bugs Bunny's original name? Ephraim the Retarded Rabbit. Call me Ephraim. Ephraim the Retarded Rabbit. Call me Ephraim.

It wasn't Ephraim the Retarded Rabbit, I don't think. I think it was. Call him Dr. Velveteen, the Velveteen Rabbit. That was a sad one. That was pretty close. Ask him about Benicula. Superchat him, like, what was your favorite Benicula book? Because it's Halloween time. What's that book about all the bunnies who are living in the burrows,

and then they bulldoze the burrows, and into an animated movie that was the rats water ship down Oh I don't know come up with a different name it's more literary than the secret of NIMH column it yeah what's the name of the five ol five ol goes west don't that was a man I don't call me five ol why not Bible was cool yeah how many Palestinians is five will kill I don't call me Fievel. Why not? Fievel was cool. How many Palestinians did Fievel kill? I don't know. I didn't see that one in that movie. Fievel goes west. Fievel 3. Fievel

goes home. Yeah, Fievel goes to the promised land. I didn't see that one. G33X for two. Chris Chan made those videos for Vito's birthday. I think he did. Oh, that's cool. You're welcome for tenses. You guys should get some ordinary gamers on the podcast. He recently had Justin Wang

on his podcast where he talked about how Maddox absolutely exposed him. I've met Some Ordinary Gamers. Very cool guy. Yeah. He's not in LA, but we could have him come out.

Koo for Tens is, Vito, you gotta be careful with his Japanese auction websites. You can easily end up paying triple the cost of the goods price if you lose all your money. Thank you for not killing yourself. Don't spend

too much money. Yeah. Jose M for five. Sounds like a challenge. How is Eric Jolly thinking about a video game where you can't even tell an interesting or coherent story? Not to mention he has endless stock of unsold inventory. Because he's a moron! Because he's an idiot! He's a child! He's thinking about game

design. He's thinking about the part of video games he has the least expertise in. He's your moronic friend who's sitting on the couch and goes, did I ever tell you about my idea for a video game? You play it in your sleep. You play it in your sleep. It's got a combat system.

It's got combos. You can dodge. It's kind of like Marvel Avengers. So you can play while you're sleeping and not be awake, but then you wake up and you feel like you played the game. And it comes with a special headset

that jacks you off. Pee and Wienerstein for two. Pants and underwear on the floor at public urinals. It's pretty gross. Specific. At least you're not taking your shirt off. Yeah. What the fuck is that about? Human Dynamo

for five. The best way to end the war is to fund a hunt to no. Drunken Atheist Studio for two. Says Diddy Kong Racing was pretty good. Fuck Diddy Kong Racing. Incorrect. And Crash Bandicoot Racing. Just rip offs. Fuck you. Somehow they got me. Jose M for five.

Well, the next one says it. Eric July's book sales must be so terrible right now. He must be getting desperate if he needs to bring back His shitty incoherent podcast For Can't rights sake Okay It says Vito said to be fair where did he say it

Where did Vito say to be fair Somebody tell me on the Stream chat See this bit never works because you always miss them Well you should actually Make me read on the stream chat. See, this bit never works because you always miss them. You should actually make me read a 200 or 300 word essay if I miss it.

I don't want you to read that much. Just say you respect Eric Shalini. No, I don't want you to do that. It has to be big. It has to be a big thing for it to be funny. Earlier? Okay, I'll take want you to do that. It has to be big. It has to be a big thing for it to be funny. Earlier? Okay, I'll take that.

I suck, Hawks. Yeah, we'll give it to you. We'll give it to you. Diamond G also reminds us. Nominal for two says, I'm a racist, and even I think the show is going too far. Oh, come on. What do we do? Why don't you kill yourself?

No, in Minecraft. Minecraft only. Oh, you can't say that? Why don't you kill yourself? No, in Minecraft. Minecraft only. Oh, you can't say that? I don't think you can. But he's a racist. He said. I don't know, sir. You're not allowed to kill anybody.

Rusty Shackleford. Even yourself? No, you can kill yourself. Well, that's what I said to him. No, but you. Stop. I know. Okay. Ten for Rusty Shackleford. Sorry for the shitty super chat. More money. Oh, but you. Stop. I know. Okay.

Ten for Rusty Shackleford. Sorry for the shitty super chat. More money. Oh, thank you, Rusty. What was the shitty super chat? I don't know. DrunkenAtheistStudio for two says, happy birthday, Vito. And for another two, he says, Bunnicula is the shit. Tortrist for seven Canadians says, Waylord is from Hoenn.

The biggest Pokemon in Johto would be Steelix, but vito would need a jawline to be compared that's just mean that is just steelix is cool aklovich for five vito where are we with regards to wearing the hijab i worry for your safety also like your content looking forward to super killer number one also happy happy birthday thank you Aklevich what a show Dick can I see our top supporters up on the board somebody sent me a message going

I joined the Patreon you didn't add my name to it yet yeah I do it like every month month and a half I told you it would

be a pain in the ass it is a pain in the ass so everybody whatever this is the ones if you want to get on it earlier join the Patreon

earlier and then you'll already be on it and then you'll have nothing to complain about I know but I told you there it is guys all our Dick