The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 114

Episode Date: November 11, 2023

Not big-leaguing. Tony said I was big-leaguing him. Tony's in a smaller league than you. Yeah. So it's not big-leaguing. It's just... It's just... Leaguing.

It's just communicating. How are you big-leaguing Tony? Because, like, he, like, rips on me, and then I go, Well, you're just mad because I can put Brie Larson's face in a thumbnail and get as many views as your How Many Goonies are in the Goonies video or whatever. Yeah. He said you're big-leaguing. Which Goonies is the most Goonies of the Goonies?

Yeah, and he said I'm big-leaguing him, and I'm like, I'm just fucking around. Obviously, I know you're working harder on that shit than I am. Yeah, you have, like, shill content that everyone hates. Tony has real, like, feel-good content about Goonies. Which Goonie do you want to fuck? Which Goonie gives the best head, right? Which Goonie gives the best head? Which Goonie is getting the best head?

It's from a kid, though. I'm glad we're not live. Not from an adult, not a pedophile. It's which Goonie is getting the best head from another kid. I'm so glad this is not live. It's being recorded. I know it's being recorded. This is the cold open, man.

Okay. What do you mean? Is that bad? Uh-oh. Whoops. You're going to hit transition. I'm not going to hit it. I'm going to do it this way.

That's fine. Is it bad to talk about? Stop it. Let me ask the audience. We were having a conversation before the show. No, we weren't. It wasn't a conversation. Is it?

Like the chipmunks. Which chipmunk is getting the best head? Those are kids. Which chipmunk is getting the best head? Yeah. Tell me you haven't seen that meme. No, I haven't. Is that a thing?

What are you talking about? Wait, why are the chipmunks getting head from the chipettes? I don't know if they say. They used to not say. It was just chopped off at the waist and they're like, Oh, all the chipmunks are gone. Which chipmunk's getting the best head? And you're like, it better not be Alvin.

We'll give you action and satisfaction. We're the chipmunks. We got our nuts in your mouth. We've got our nuts in your mouth. We're the chipmunks. Oh, shit. I was going to start this stream by going... Wow.

You and this X-Men thing. That song, you don't know? I know the X-Men. It took a second. If I got married, I would play that song as my first dance at my wedding. And then me and all my best men would walk around going... The bride is like, can we take some nice photos? And you're like, schnit, schnit.

Think, bub. What do you think, bub? Bub. What do you think, bubs? All night. We'd all have... All you and all the groomsmen. All Wolverines.

The all Wolverines wedding. That poor woman. And then I would marry another Wolverine. Like I'd say, get out of here. We're doing our own thing. Well, of course, you're all hyped up on X-Men Fever because our newest video has dropped. Yeah. The biggest review of the Marvels.

Somebody did leave a comment saying it should be the biggest problem in the Marvels. That classic debate rages on. It's not the biggest review. We name multiple problems, though. And then what? At the end we gotta name which one? We should have said the biggest problem. I mean, it should be. Okay, so what was the biggest problem

in the Marvels? At the end, we can do that. Yeah. What was the biggest problem in the Marvels? The lack of emotional arcs of any sort not enough brie larson in a white tank top yeah whatever that is smaller than a tank top frazier's shitty cameo oh no that was i would say not enough frazier but there was the perfect amount of fra enough Frasier was the perfect amount of Frasier. I wish Eddie would have been in there, too, though. Which Eddie? Eddie was his dad's dog in Frasier. Oh, okay.

The dad would be cool, but at least a little. I thought you were doing X-Men lore, but you're doing Frasier lore. Like, which X-Men was Eddie? Hold on. I'm like, I know Venom is Eddie Brock. No, Eddie the terrier, the Boston Terrier. Except for Joe Cristalli fucked up that Frasier reboot. Speaking of Frasier.

Yeah, I was supposed to make a video talking about how much they fucked it up. I guess I still will. Let's review that. We're going to watch the Frasier reboot? Everyone says they're like, what the fuck? Niles is not in it, which is like, what's the point? He's in a different city. Is his son in it?

That would be cool. I don't know. Hey, I'm fucking Niles' son. I'm a real maverick renegade. The guy who played his dad must be dead by now, right? Oh, the detective? Yeah. That would suck.

Yeah. What about Daphne? Is she fat now? She couldn't be, you know? I mean, odds are she's fat. But again, check out our review of the Marvels. You can watch the non-spoiler review on my channel, which Dick takes issue with for some reason. It was just a weird conversation to get where we got.

It was a real conversation, and I think we did it wrong, and my original idea idea was better but we'll talk about that at some point your original idea is fucked a lot of channels will do a non-spoiler review and then a spoiler review and they're like separate videos so your idea is we come back from a movie we sit down we talk for five minutes in generalities about the movie yes which you did a very bad job of. No, you did a bad job. You did a bad job of talking about it, because you're like, yeah, but then in this one part, they didn't even tell them about the thing. No, I don't think I did do that.

Everything you said in generalities relied on specific information that you did not give the audience. Well, maybe I'm bad at that. I'll watch some other non-spoiler reviews to see how to do that. The reason it doesn't work is that people come to my channel and they watch that video and then they leave after three minutes to go watch the other video. So YouTube goes, wow, this video must

suck. Yeah, I don't know why you thought you wanted to do that. No, I didn't want to do that. That's what you convinced me to do, which was incorrect. My original idea was actually better. Your original idea is we come back from a movie We do like a five minute

Review that has no spoilers And then we start completely over But we don't have to start completely over Another review that's an hour Okay but we can just have a very quick intro That just goes this is the movie Here's the actors we're getting into it That's it

But how do we get into it without like talking in general about it I'll try it but it's weird Well other channels do we get into it without like talking in general about it i'll try it but it's weird well other channels do it and i think it works and honestly though uh it did bring over some new people the biggest problem we might have some new people watching here tonight okay we got like 50 new subscribers which is great and they're listening to stuff about the chipmunks getting head well that's your fault. You did that. Started off, I come in here talking about... Because the question was, the question we were talking about

was which goonie is getting the best head. No, you were talking about that. I do not know which goonie is getting head or getting head. Now we're talking about it again. And I said, so it's fine to say about the chipmunks, but you can't say which goonie is getting the best head?

Because the chipmunks... It's another kid. And then I said it's another kid doing it, so it's not any kind of a... The goonies are human children, okay? Alvin and the chipmunks, there's a layer of fantasy. We're talking about them getting head. It's

separated enough that you would, you know... Why are we starting the show talking about this? You're talking about it. You are talking about it. I was just making a joke. All right, you want to get the show started? Let's do it. We're already late.

Oh, yeah. Biggest problem in the universe. Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe. Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe. The only show that brings every problem in the universe from Russian-filled saunas to the guy dating your mama. Oh! You know how I stick to that? You're going to be both.

Hello, Dick. What's up, buddy? How you doing? Good? You done with Marvel now? Are we done with Marvel? Will we be done with Marvel? I don't know. What else is coming from Marvel? How you doing? Good. You done with Marvel now? Are we done with Marvel? We be done with Marvel?

I don't know. What else is coming from Marvel? I don't even know. We can just wait. No more superhero stuff until the Rip-A-Verse. I think the next Marvel thing is... No, Armor Wars? See, Armor Wars might be good. Because why? Because Rhodey in the fucking War Machine suit.

Don Cheadle's? Don Cheadle, yeah. The problem is it's going to have that lady. It's Terrence Howard. Which one is it? Terrence Howard is the one who got fired in the first Iron Man and got replaced by Don Cheadle. Is it the Hotel Rwanda guy? He gets a super suit?

Is Don Cheadle the guy from Hotel Rwanda? I think that's correct. Training Day? I don't remember any of these things. They should have got Cuba Gooding. Hey, big news. We might have a black guy on in a couple weeks, right? You're going to announce it right away?

I went, Dick, I got a guest for the show. Big one. Big score. On our alt-right white supremacist podcast, we might get a black guest finally. So the Marvels was so bad that you had a cancer. Yes. Is that what happened? My cancer has been taken care of.

You're kind of cheating at the weight loss thing with that, though. Yeah. You know that, right? I had what we assume is a benign, what do they call it, a lymphoma. Who's we? You and the other pedophiles. The general. Why does this have anything to do with the show?

Yeah. All right. We. Ironically, yeah. No, they just quickly cut it out and put it in a jar. It was in my back. Wow. Yeah, it wasn't a big deal, I don't think.

Do they gotta, like, taste it for cancer? Yeah, they gotta send it to a lab, but the doctor's like, I don't know, it looks pretty benign to me. How much did it weigh? I didn't ask, man. Well, that's like, I mean, if it's... It was a big old lump. It looked big. Yeah. Some people thought it was your penis.

I know. It kind of looked like a little penis or whatever. A lot of people were concerned. I'm like, I don't think it's a big deal. It's just something that happens. So yeah, the tumor came out of me. That's what, five pounds probably I'm down? It looked like about five pounds.

All right, we're going to win this thing. Did you weigh yourself? Time to celebrate with some Sour Patch Kids. No, I didn't weigh myself today. All right, let's do the... Sounds good to me. Picking on Step Dads for the wrong reasons. That was the winner.

That was you. That was me. Idea Guys, the winner. That was you. That was me. Idea guys, second. And that was you. And Slavic men treating the gym like a Turkish bath. Well, Value Select, Max, should not feel bad because we got a lot of positive comments. On him. Yeah, he was a great guest.

Yeah. And, of course, subscribe to him at Value Select TV on YouTube. Google Bomb says this guest didn't say too much but what he did say was top notch. There you go. Yeah I was wondering. I'm like did we do that thing where we like talked over the guy but he was getting in there I thought.

That's the best thing you can do. If they say barely anything but like a couple good things that's the best. Yeah, that's a good guess. We know the formula, and they're getting in there. Yeah. Verbal sparring. It's better than some guys who've got to be like, I'm here.

I'm doing a thing. Like who? I was thinking of a guy. A guy who liked puppets. Me? No I've tried to listen to the old Biggest Problem There was a certain guest who was on a lot Made a Christmas album

Oh And every And I'm like I should catch up on the lore of the show I should learn it And every episode that guy's on I'm like that I should catch up on the lore of the show. I should learn it. And then every episode that guy's on, I'm like, that guy really likes being here. Being part of the magic, I guess. Okay.

Rob, the dating advice girl. I do think that guy's funny. The other stuff, he's not as funny. The bread name says, Dick's unrelenting hatred of Boogie is the funniest thing on the show in a while. Guys, stop saying in a while. If you make a compliment, just delete the in a while part. It's the funniest thing on the show. Period.

It's funny. You don't need to denigrate the rest of the show to give a compliment. That means that other things have been funny. That could be interpreted positively. I guess in a while infers it's been a long time. It's been a drought since there's been something funny. So say it's the funniest thing right now. Yeah.

There you go. Do you speak to your wife like this? That's the hottest you've looked in a while. This is the thinnest you've been in a while. God. Yeah. You fucking incel. Get a clue.

Well. Thank you. I heard Boogie arguing with Mudahar today i meant to watch that and then i didn't watch that was it good there's like a lot of boogie stuff going on because he's doing obviously the documentary just dropped and he's also doing his lol cow podcast oh yeah with tommy c yeah and i talked to tommy c i went on his show briefly, and he said, Boogie came to him, and he's like, listen, you know, the show is great or whatever. Just don't talk about, not don't talk about my girlfriend, but don't something about my girlfriend. Don't be rude to my girlfriend, I guess.

He's such a fuck. He's always, he's always, yeah he's evil i'm the only i see it well tommy was like it's the lol cow podcast obviously part of your lol count is is the fact that you're dating anorexic hooker that you're old yeah how do we not talk about that it's disgusting why would we not it's the lowliest thing that you've got going on right now i think we're gonna i might get into Boogie a little bit. Boogie said to Mudahar that he would prove... He says, I could prove that my girlfriend's 20 right now.

I have her ID in my wallet. And I was... Oh, no. I was listening to it on Ralph, and me and Ralph at the same time go, why do you have... Why are you carrying her ID? What is this, like an Andrew Tate situation? Yeah, I was going to say, I got her passport and her wallet and this long...

And this length of chain that I can use to pull her into the room. I talk to her parents on her behalf. For her, I relay things, you know. Well, I'm sure it's all going to work out. He was fighting with Mudahar because he called Mudahar's wife, but he says he didn't know it was his wife. More lies. Mudahar's wife is Dojangles, another YouTube person. She's fantastic.

Yeah, she follows me, I guess. I haven't seen her content, but I guess she was shitting on Boogie, and for some reason he decided to find her phone number and call her. And Mudahar's like, bitch, don't be calling her. What are you doing? What are you doing? What the fuck's wrong with you? He's going through a lot. Bookie? He's going through a lot of

fast food. Yeah, I was gonna say. Nothing else. I was waiting for you to pick a food item. He's going through a lot and I'm like, I can already see the gears turning. You're like, pizza, hot dogs. I'll just go with fast food. That will cover all the bases.

That piece of crap. I hope he loses his house and he has to live in a big pile of shit under a freeway. I just want him to just make good content. I hope he falls into a time portal and ends up in the Old West and everyone kicks the shit out of him all day, every day. I don't know why the Old West is the place for that to happen. Guys, that's where you can do anything. That's what white people eat. There's no rules.

Wild, all over the country. Kick the shit out of this fat piece of shit. Maybe he would thrive as a... As a pig. Could be a bartender. Serving up sarsaparilla in the old saloon. Boogie Saloon. You could work at a whorehouse.

Yeah. Well, Boogie, we're all pulling for you. Except Dick. Yeah, I'm not. Who wants you to suffer. Evil Fandango says it would be hilarious if someone started a comic book called Super Liver about a superhero doctor who travels to other dimensions healing and resuscitating superheroes that got killed.

Super Liver? Yeah. Oh, like he makes them live? Yeah, he typed that whole thing out. Wow. That was, okay. Brilliant stuff. Martin O'Keefe says,

Vito comparing hand sizes with the guest and touching his hand. That's a move I used to do with women in my 20s, but never men. That's the gayest thing that's ever been on the show. I was surprised I had slightly bigger hands than him. You were doing that. Well, he's a swimmer. Normally swimmers, they're like paddle hands, man, so you can push all that water. I did get a brief sexual thrill, though, I must admit.

Steve Larry says, I didn't think Vito could get gayer, but now he's dyeing his beard? Well, I always, I talked about this on the show, that there's like, I get white hairs, but it's only on this side, so it looks

fucking moronic. Like, who wants half a white beard so I just even it out my beard got real gray here yeah um sinkhole says I lost 50 pounds in two months by eating nothing but bacon and eggs for every meal with a coffee in the morning I saw that yeah I do like bacon and eggs that's been a part of my diet routine. Do some eggs in the morning. That's all he ate, though. That's it. Well, the bacon's not terrible in terms of calories.

That's true. It's protein. I guess if you knock off the calories, then you can worry about the cholesterol and stuff later. Yeah, once you're down, then you can worry about blocking out your heart. Yeah. The human body is a poison trap anyway. What are you going to do? That's all I have.

Do you have any segments that I straight into problems? Okay. Got out of the doctor's office. I do have, I think I might have a Vito's Twitter. Let me see. Vito's Twitter. I got a bunch. Vito's Twitter.

Vito being Vito on Twitter. What happened to Vito's stock tips? I've been killing it. Vito's Twitter. Palantir. Vito's Twitter. Vito being Vito on Twitter. What happened to Vito's stock tips? I've been killing it. Vito's Twitter. Palantir. Vito's Twitter. Vito being Vito on Twitter. Stock tip Vito.

Day trader Vito. Vito on Twitter. Actually, I think I told a bunch of people to buy Cruz stock. I saw that. It's like in the toilet. Right after they bought it, it was up to like 17, and then boo! Everything went down though. Is that what you're doing? Day trading and stuff?

I'm not day trading. I invest in the long term. I've just been adding to my positions. Do you know Palantir? That AI company? Yeah. The war AI company? Yeah. I don't know if I'm allowed. Is this insider trading?

You don't know shit. What do you mean insider trading? You don't know fucking anything. Some army guy was like, listen. Some fucking army guy? Vito, you gotta buy Palantir. We're going to war. Well, it's not that we're going to war. It's more that it's just like, it's showing up everywhere.

What army guy told you that? You think you're going to get busted by the SEC for insider trading? No, I know. I know. I'm saying all this AI stuff, though. The more I play with AI, the more I'm just convinced that, like, it's going to be running our entire society. Yeah. You mean openly?

Because the government's had it for a while. Yeah, sure. It's just cheap for us now. So, basically, like, Microsoft. I bought a shit ton of Microsoft. Yeah, sure. It's just cheap for us now. So basically like Microsoft, I bought a shit ton of Microsoft. Oh, okay. This is the veto on Twitter. Why is everyone giving me shit for this?

They're saying it supports your side, which doesn't make any sense. Yeah, because it's retarded. It's not retarded. It's a perfect example. Well, why is everyone giving you shit for it then? Because everyone in our audience is a moron except me. Remember when I made that overlay and you still won't put it in here? Where is it? No matter how many times I fucking email it to you.

Where is it? Hold on. No, it's somewhere. I just lost it, man. God, sorry. Sorry I didn't use your precious overlay. It organizes the thing so you don't have to move windows and constantly be overlays. Well, I forgot.

Where is it? That says overlays right there. Is it this one? There you go. The two one. The two one. That one. Yes.

This one? No. Wow. That's helpful. That looks fucking amazing now. Yeah, you can make both our boxes. See how my box is smaller than your box? Oh, yeah.

All right. So we can be the same size. All right. That's literally be the same size. All right. That's literally infinitely better. You're welcome. Let's get back to it. He chose Twitter. The Twitter at hand.

Okay. You said, why would anyone poison kids? That's your quote. That's me. That's my quote. Why would anyone do that? See, I remember why we stopped doing this, because you play with stuff and it moves the mouse, so then I can't control it. I'll put the mouse here.

Why would anyone poison kids? And then this says in 2008 a Chinese milk company intentionally tainted baby formula powder so they could pass quality control tests. At least six infants died and hundreds of thousands of more got

sick. This is milk producer and trader G Genji Ping. Is it Genji Ping begging or is he begging? I think he is currently begging right there. Genji Ping begging for forgiveness during his trial. He was executed in 2009. Yes. So this is an argument that you think...

This is an argument for regulation. For regulating. Yeah. So then I assume that they did not have regulations when he did the poisoning then. No, I assume they did have regulations, which is why what he did was illegal. No, murder was already illegal. But if murder is illegal through the sale of a product, it's not. Yeah.

You can say... You killed a bunch of people. Yeah, we're going to kill you. Oh, what? All I did was put lead in the milk, though. Well, yeah, that would be the argument because it's like, well, it's not illegal to sell lead milk. That's not against the law.

No, negligence is... Like, if you leave a big hole in your yard and somebody falls into it, you're going to jail. I think that it's useful to have laws that say, hey, if you put poison in baby form. But they had that law here. They had the law, right? And somehow it didn't stop it. Okay, I'm not arguing for pre-crime, okay? I'm not arguing for three guys in a fucking water tank to predict who's going to build a fucking Jewish dance hall incorrectly and everyone's going to...

We have business regulations so that you build things right and you make products safely and don't fuck up and make things out of pasteboard and kill everybody. Okay, so I just want to know why did he put, it's a weird thing to do to put poison in milk. To pass a quality control test? Yeah, I don't understand. I'd have to look up the actual story. Well, it turns out there was a regulation on milk so that it had to, the government regulated it

and said it had to have this much protein in it. So he was at making the protein. He was putting it in the milk to meet the government regulations. Okay, that's still not an argument against regulations. Someone deliberately skirting the law

to avoid a regulation. He's skirting the law, he's breaking the law. Exactly, he is breaking the regulation. He's got all this good milk. He's skirting the law. He's breaking the law. Yeah, exactly. He is breaking the regulation. He's got all this good milk. He's got good milk. You don't know that it was good. It was good before he put a bunch of fucking melamine in it. How do you know it was good?

It was probably bullshit milk. Because milk comes good. It comes out of a fucking cow good. Maybe, maybe it was, okay. And only six people got killed out of like, you know, hundreds of thousands of milks. I like that your argument is that milk was probably good and he had to make it poison. Well, did they die from poison or from bad milk? You don't usually die from bad milk because you go, whoa, that's bad.

Like all milk goes bad and people don't die from it because they can tell. They can't tell what a chemical is in it. You are twisting this in the stupidest fucking way. Okay. Would they all be dead? When I buy a house, I want to make sure the house is made out of lumber and not... You want to make sure it has a sewer, right? Yeah.

I do want to make sure it has a sewer. And then, yeah, somehow... Okay, again, your argument is that people avoiding regulations is not an argument against regulations. It's an argument for stricter regulation checks and safety inspectors and whatever else. So would this have happened if there wasn't that quality regulation on the milk? I don't know, sir. No, obviously. I assume. The answer is no.

You don't know that. He would have just added goo to his milk for fun? He would have found a way to make milk. The way he was supposed to make this happen was to produce milk that met whatever regulatory standards the government decided. The Chinese government. The Chinese government. All right. I got to support this guy's right to sell shit milk.

No, you got to make decent milk No you gotta make decent milk If you wanna sell it It's just like milk You buy it and you're like there's not any kind of goofy like chemicals In this milk is there And he's like well I can't say yes cause that's illegal But I can't sell it unless it has this protein in it Next week I'm gonna bring in whatever the fucking

Actual story is and we'll go through it That is the story No you ambush me with these things where you go You fucking called me out Actually He had perfectly good We'll go through it. That is the story. Now, you ambush me with these things where you go, you fucking called me out. Well, actually, actually, he had perfectly good milk. In fact, his milk was incredible, and the government made him turn it into poison. Does this look like a man who has bad milk?

You're telling me, look, he's got a snappy vest here. I can't tell the difference between them. You got two guys holding him down? What's going on in court in China? Well, have you ever seen Chinese court proceedings? They're hilarious. No. They just walk you in and you go, did you sell drugs? And you're like, yeah. And they're like, alright. Shoot him in the head. Guilty.

Yeah. It takes two seconds. How did they end up with this green chairs? You know, ours are like blue or tan. I don't know. Maybe they thought it would look good on film. So you're the winner of that argument? Yes. No.

My problem is tinnitus. Tinnitus. Do you know what that is? I do. It is a ringing, a persistent ringing in your ears. Like, right after you get out of a rock concert, I think, eh.

We haven't done this problem before. We have? No, I'm saying, have we? I don't know. Why are you asking that? I think we haven't. Oh, we have? No, I'm saying, I think we have not,

but for some reason... You think we did it before? It might just be my persistent interest in tinnitus. Why do you have a persistent interest in tinnitus? Because it's horrifying. Oh, that's why? Yeah. I think we haven't done it.

I don't think so. No, we haven't done it. No. I guess maybe just I have tinnitus on the brain. So I have... You did earworms. Mine hasn't gone away for about nine days. Where did you go to obtain tinnitus?

Just life. I played piano for 25 years It's What do you mean it hasn't gone away for 9 days? It's been It's been Sorry anytime somebody says that I'm sailing away

So somehow You don't know what caused It's hard to describe the noise to people Because it's not like a note that you hear or make It's like It's like if a broken appliance is plugged in somewhere In your house And you can hear that electricity

It's a high pitched whine High pitched hurts Maybe I could find it with an oscilloscope Or a tool or something It never goes away You can't plug your ears because it's in your brain Because your hairs are Malfunctioning

And I think if it goes I think if I have to do this for another Another couple Months or years I'm gonna blow my fucking You can say brains Brains. Can you?

You can say... I think you can threaten to kill yourself. I don't think you can do that. Maybe you can't. Say your player avatar. I will blow my me. I will blow my me's head off. Yeah.

In my... I'm going to play Modern Warfare 3 and throw a grenade at my feet. I'm going to stub my... I'm going to kick my toe right against my bed on purpose in the dark, in the middle of the night. Well, I remember reading some, uh,

some stories of, uh, there was one man who went to a rock concert and he stood too close to the speakers just once. Uh, yeah. Well, I don't,

he said it was just this one thing, and he developed tinnitus, and it sent him into a terrible depression where he's like, all I had to do was not stand next to the speakers, and now this horrible noise is in my head. And then he wrote a letter to his family, and he said, I just can't do it anymore, and he did end up mind-crafting himself. Here, I got interesting stats on that. 20.1% of tinnitus patients reported having suicidal thoughts 1 in 5

That's not high enough No that seems like normal I feel like the normal rate is higher than that Yeah I had suicidal thoughts yesterday What are you guys thinking about all the time? Just for fun Thinking about the office

That's the difference with a normal person Just replace anything thinking about the office. That's the difference with a normal person. Just replace anything thinking about the office with suicide. Compared to 12.2% without tinnitus. So it's just a 9% jump. I mean, that's significant, I suppose. About double. Suicide attempts were 1.2 compared to 0.6. So double the suicide also.

Going for it. We're giving the tea crew a run for their money. The T crew, Jesus Christ. I forgot which one was the slur. You're talking about low testosterone men, of course, the T crew. Yeah. This study gave concrete evidence between tinnitus and suicide. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Do you know who is a famous sufferer of tinnitus? Hitler. Is that true? No. I mean, I don't know. The correct answer was William Shatner, who on the set of Star Trek, Explosion went off next to him, and he developed a horrible case of tinnitus,

and he's actually, I believe, a spokesperson for the National Tinnitus Council. Really? And that sounds like one of those things I made up as like a goof, but that's actually true. I need to fact check that. Because I make up a lot of shit on this show, and I'm like, that sounds fake as hell. Shattertonitis.

Look, he's always talking about it. Look, American Tonitis Association. Click on that E online. I thought I was in a bad mood before, but my mood has really fallen off a fucking cliff. What do you want me to click on? Hit that E online. It's only 52 seconds. I want to hear how Shatner deals with tinnitus.

Okay. Well, maybe it'll give you some ideas for how to live with your tinnitus. Deal with it! I think they have some new, like, treatments. No! They don't! When it happens, is it something you feel? You realize it?

Or you start to hear this, and then for weeks you're like, what is this? What is this? And then you have to deal like, what is this? What is this? And then you have to do it. She's exactly right. I was on the beach. And it's a vivid moment. And you know how the waves go out. Wake them up.

You know why he's able to live with it? Why? Because he killed his wife. Wait, did Shatner's wife die? She drowned or something in a pool. It's always a drowning with these guys. And he watched it. He was on the side of the pool kicking her fingers off until she got tired, I think.

I think that Phil Collins song is about him. Which one? The one I remember when you were drowning. Really? Do you know that? No, it's not. But do you know that famous Phil Collins in the air tonight?

I only know Peter Gabriel. I don't know any Phil Collins. I can feel it calling in the air tonight. You The I only know Peter Gabriel I don't know any Phil Collins I can feel it Calling in the air tonight You don't know that song? No I know like Da da da da Da da

You definitely know that Okay I know Shock Sledgehammer I know Like that Da da da Da da da

Ba ba ba The urban myth For some reason Was that Phil Collins Watched a guy Who didn't jump in To save somebody else who was drowning and then invited him to the concert and sang that song for the first time to get that guy. And you're like, that's the stupidest, most obviously fake story I've ever heard.

Man, boomers, they made up some dumb shit. Their memes were stupid. Did you know there's a munchkin in the back of Wizard of Oz that's hanging? He hung himself? You know, they say with an A, uh, and the other way to say it is like, ER.

Like, yeah, okay, cool meme. Thanks. I am more surprised that you don't know what's calling in the air tonight than your stupid tonightist thing. Let me hear one of the rest. I want to hear one with Shatner. Come on. It's only a minute.

It goes out. Is that what you're experiencing? I'm like a YouTube guy. I'm hearing this. Even though there was another wave coming.

And that's how I discovered that I was. And it started. And I went to the doctor and said, will it get worse? And he said, this is bullshit.

It might not. But of course it does. Oh my God. See your fuck. It gets worse. As you age, it gets worse, he says. It's always been there. I've always been concerned about it, but now it's not going away. Well, maybe you should contact Mr. Shatner's American Tinnitus Association.

We can shoot each other. That would be a nice way to go. What's up, Shatner? Is he dead? Shatner's still alive. He went to space recently. Did you hear about that? That was awesome

He totally backstabbed Bezos Wait how? Because he said it was Really depressing and awful It's horrible This is all we have Space sucks

Yes He went up there And he's like I didn't feel any majesty at all I just felt horribly alone And realized we're trapped On this fucking rock Yeah

That was an awesome That was a top ten anime betrayal. I like Shatner. I know I'm supposed to not like him because he's kind of a dick, but I'm kind of a dick as well. Why do I like Shatner? No, why are you not supposed to like him? Famously, I think on the set of Star Trek,

he was like a jerk or something. Fuck those nerds. George Takei really hates him. I think George Takei says he was homophobic. George Takei belongs in an internment camp. He raped a guy. He did rape a guy. George Takei fucking sexually molested a guy.

George Takei is kind of worse than Shatner. Younger than him. Shatner's never done that shit. Shatner's also in that, he was a follower of that guy who's going to make us all live forever. So Shatner would take like a hundred supplement pills every day.

There's some guy and he made his dad into a robot. He's like an old guy and he says we're all going to live forever as robots. Phil Collins? Yeah, it was Phil Collins. I watched the documentary about him and Shatner and a bunch of other rich people all follow his shit. Yeah, I take a hundred pills every day

because I want to live forever. So Shatner's going to get frozen. Are you going to get frozen? Would you get frozen? Yes. You would? Yeah. Alcor, baby. What's that? That is the largest head freezing operation in the domestic United States. Just your head? Well, you can get the full body

but there's no point and it costs way more money. There's no point to either one. Nah, they're going to bring you back and then you get to see the future. Why would they do that? I think if you... They'd just dump you in the trash. No, you have to assume that in the future somebody... Imagine if we could bring back like a knight of the Crusades.

Yeah, but it's not going to be you. If they activate your brain, you're not going to be any kind of person in there still. Well, what kind of person am I now? Who knows what's rattling around in here. What if you come back? What if they wake you up in the future and everyone's fatter than hell? Like, huge.

So I'm going to be... The skinny one. The skinny one. Yeah. That would be a good movie. Fat guy freezes himself, comes back in the future, and everyone's like,

how are you so skinny? And he's like, hey, kind of like this. Alright, that's my problem. Alright, here comes my problem. And if you have it, don't fucking, don't tell me. Don't send me some sob story about your version of it. I don't want to hear it. I think there are

some sort of treatments now that you should look into. Treat these nuts. Go to the Spearmint Rhino. That's my treatment. Okay. So the inspiration for this problem was a man we've been talking about a lot, a man named Boogie2988. Okay. Who has been tweeting endlessly.

He's dating an 18-year-old girl, I hear. Okay. Well, that's a whole other story. This is a guy who has a documentary about him, and up until the release of the documentary, he was tweeting all sorts of things about how it was going to be the end of his career. You know? Yeah.

I found this tweet responding to somebody asking him how much money he would make from the documentary. He says, there's no revenue from the documentary. It is entirely free. I'm not here to make money. I'm here to hold myself accountable and show the world how I destroyed my own life so they can do better than I did. It's my

swan song. And then for some reason, he posted a screenshot of the definition of swan song, and I was like, I think everybody knows what a swan song is, dude. I didn't have to do it, but basically saying, the end. It's the end. It's the end of my career.

I guess I'll just die now. I guess I'll just die. After this documentary'll just die now I guess I'll just die After this documentary comes out Everyone's gonna find out how much I suck Then he's gonna restart his life as like El Bugarino And have like a mustache and stuff Just make your stupid 18 year old girlfriend

Start an OnlyFans Yeah It's free money Right It's the way I mean If I had an 18 year old girlfriend Who you could abuse Who I could abuse

Mercilessly And hold on to her ID for some reason. I don't think you're that many steps away from bullying her into an OnlyFans at that point. You're obviously both trash asking to be abused, like with every fiber of your being, and no one will give it to you. Might as well give it a shot. Boogie then, a couple days ago, says, When I first watched this documentary i thought to myself it's over everyone will hate me after this i was okay with it but that's not

what happened yeah instead i saw so much love in response most of it is tough love but so many of you still want to see me succeed as we were were filming that doc, I felt like I had given up. Can I get a Diet Coke? Please. Please. Not sorry, it's please. I'm not good at pleasantries. I know, you texted me before you got here saying,

what did you say? Can I get a coffee? No, no, you said, not to be retarded, can I get a coffee? You could just ask. Yeah, but it's like, it's rude to ask somebody to make you a thing.

Saying not to be retarded does not make it not rude that's we have etiquette and manners that make things not rude i guess i could say hey i would really appreciate i'm a little low energy could you make me a coffee before i get there please absolutely can i get a fucking coffee not to yo not to be gay or retarded over here but But anyway, Boogie says, today I feel like trying again. My problem is fake retirements. Thank you. Oh, yeah. Like Michael Jordan.

Like everybody. It just goes on forever. At this point, when somebody retires now, especially when they're a young guy, I'm like, shut the fuck up. You know you're going to back in like two seconds uh i had a list of different ones and i was surprised at how many there are across all that medicare on that list do you i don't have medicare but i should because i thought you might because i would say that's out of line you better watch it if you don't put him on that's a cancer thing that's a little different you know he only came

back one for one stream he came back for one stream fair enough you fucking't put him on there. That's a cancer thing. That's a little different. He only came back for one stream. He came back for one stream. Fair enough. Why don't you fucking put Medgar on there? Elton John retires from touring in 1977, returns in 1979. Motley Crue retires in 2015, then their big biopic hits.

They are thrust back in the spotlight, and God forbid they reunite in 2019. Kiss retires in 97, comes back in 2004, retires again in 2018. I'm sure they'll be back. Yeah. Ozzy, 92, back in 95. Now he's finally retired in 23, but he's already talking again. What about Obama?

About coming back. He's retired, and then he's weighing in on stuff all the time. That's a little different. Did he say I retired from public life or I retired from president stuff? Should have been gone, man. You don't retire from being president. You just can't be president anymore. Dude, out of here. It's not just musicians,

Dick. The actor Daniel Day-Lewis, who famously retired in 97 after the movie The Boxer, came back in 2002 for Gangs of New York, and then retired again in 2017 after Phantom Thread. He did? Yeah.

He retired in 2002? No, he retired in 2017. He came back in 2002. That doesn't add up. All right, so he retired in 1997. He did? Yes. After did? Yes. After what?

The boxer. How old was he then? Like 30-something? I mean, it's only five years later he came back for Gangs of New York, so that's not even really a retirement. He retired from acting? That's what he said. Came back, then in 2017 he retires again.

Tarantino right now saying that this will be his final movie, the movie critic I kind of believe him I don't believe him at all I don't think he likes making movies I think he just wants to run like a shitty like I think he wants to run a big auditorium Where he wheels in a little AV card

He does that Plays like a worse one You know he has that theater right? Yeah I haven't gone there in like 10 years I should I feel bad The Lendley?

Is it the No it's the New Beverly. The New Beverly. They like show cool movies on film and I'm always like, man, I wish I like, you know, left my house to do cool things. I wish I was like an art aficionado. Yeah, exactly. Instead I sit at home and I play Magic Cards on the internet. I did see Enter the Void

at that theater and that was one of the most startling. Have you ever seen that movie? Is it like Evangelion kind of anime? Well, it is set in Japan, but no, it's made by... Shut up. If you've ever seen this Kanye music video... How old are the people?

They're in their 20s. You would actually like that movie. Enter the Void? Yeah. I think it's called Enter the Void. Enter the Void. It's all about a guy on a drug trip being I don't want to

spoil it. Okay. It's about a drug trip and the whole movie's first person and it's fucked up. Okay. And it has the coolest credit sequence ever which Kanye West famously just ripped off for one of his music videos. It's cool too. Alright. The one that is the most crazy, I think, is, speaking of anime, Hayao Miyazaki. Oh, Miyazaki?

Miyazaki. The Totoro guy? The Totoro guy. He retired? He retired multiple times. He won't stop retiring. Maybe it's cool, though. No, this guy, I'm like...

Hey, everybody, I'm fucking retiring. Yeah, but you know, I mean... Get it while it's hot. This is the last episode. I'm out. Well, here's the thing. It's like bullshit marketing, because then you're like, oh, man, I got to go to this concert.

I got to watch this movie. It's his last one. Yeah, but... It's bullshit. You got to be above that. It's like a fake out. You have to suppress that in yourself. this movie it's his last one yeah but it's bull it's bullshit gotta be it's like a fake out you have to repress that and you suppress that in yourself i bought the guided by voices farewell

tour documentary all about oh this is the last guided by voices show and then they come back 10 years later all right i haven't even watched that norm stand-up the last one yeah because i'm like fuck you i'm not watching it because it's the last he's gonna come back at any point yeah you're not sure you stashed another one up your ass or something. It's going to shoot out on Chris Farley's death day or something. Every time they go, this is the last Beatles album. We found the last couple Beatles songs or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So they did another one like last month. Yeah. Oh, we found another one. And everybody listened to it and they're like, well, it kind of sucks. Because it's not the 60s. Yeah. And also, you know, it's just been sitting around. It's probably a reason it didn't make it on an album.

Point is, Miyazaki, 97, makes Princess Mononoke. He goes, done making anime. 2001, he makes Spirited Away. He goes, I'm done making anime. 2013, he makes The Wind Rises. He goes, done. It's all over. Done. And then this year, The Boy and the Heron will come out,

which will be the last Miyazaki film until he just makes another one. Really, they get dumber and dumber. First, it was like, I'm a fucking monster living in a forest. And all these kids are exploring. And now he's like, I'm an architect. I'm riding a wooden bicycle. Are you talking about the one? Are you talking about The Wind Rises?

The one where he makes airplanes? Did you see that one? I don't know. Yeah. Sure. I don't know. I about the Wind Rises? The one where he makes airplanes? Did you see that one? I don't know. Yeah. Sure. I don't know. I like the Wind Rises. The Wind Rises is funny because they were making it. Speaking of Evangelion, they were making it and they were bringing in all these Japanese voice actors and they were all way too

animated. They're like, oh, the Wind Rises and a magic time or whatever. And he's like, I just need someone who's like a flat, boring, the most boring motherfucker who ever lived. And they're like, what about? And he's like, I just need someone who's like a flat, boring, the most boring motherfucker who ever lived. Yeah. And they're like, what about?

And it's like, he's like kind of like Anno, like the guy who directs Evangelion, who's like his buddy. And then he goes, let's just fucking get him. So they just got the guy

who made Evangelion to just come in and go, I like making airplanes. Airplanes are cool. I thought the tinnitus was bad, but honestly, the listening about anime makes me more suicidal i

love that story um you gotta watch the the miyazaki documentary where he tells those guys who are making like an ai uh animation have you seen that famous clip no they're like uh we've taught uh this thing it's like this creature and it moves through ai and it's learning how to crawl you know we think this could be the future of 3D animation is something like this, you know, maybe for like a creepy zombie movie or something. And Miyazaki just looks at them and he's like, you men have no souls. This is a, this is an absolute disgrace to my industry. What a fucker.

Fuck you. Get out of here. Oh, this is the most inhuman. Wow. Fuck fucking crazy, bro. All that stuff's pretty good. Parents are busy. Sorry.

It's got a style. Point is, oh, and of course, I forgot this one. Tom Brady retires from the Patriots two months later. Signs with the Buccaneers. That's got to be the shortest fucking retirement ever. That guy kisses his son on the mouth. That guy does kiss his son on the mouth. Think about that.

Well, I didn't say it. You said it. Disneyland. When he says, I'm going to Disneyland, it's like a honeymoon for him. Where are you going after the Super Bowl? Me and my son are going to go to Disneyland. Do you remember how bad that was? Come on, that wasn't even a kiss, And his masseuse is there jacking him off.

And he's like, yeah, that's what happened. That is what happened. He said, that's not a kiss? Is that what he said? I don't remember that part. Lay it on me. I just saw the picture. Lay it on.

He did not say, lay it on me. He did, I think. And he said, here, kiss my. If you don't want to kiss my mouth, kiss my hand that I'm talking with. And he's like, whoop, puts it down by his cock. He told his son, he's like, I like when you call me daddy. Say daddy. All right, well, this show's going off the fucking rails.

The point is, Boogie, you said it was over. I think you lied. I think you knew that you were preparing for a second act. Boogie's such a fucking lying control freak. Like, the way he got in front of that, the way he manipulated the director to make it like a puff piece, feel sorry for me, puff piece. Yeah.

And like secretly also sabotage, like tried to be this character that the director didn't even notice that he was like being this boogie character. Like I'm going to go for a job. Oh, Hey, like, yeah,

you know that he even said himself like, Oh yeah, you know, during that job thing, I was just, like, goofing around or whatever with the lady or whatever. Yeah, I mean, kind of. Okay. I think you're too good to feel like you should get a job, though. Like, that's what I – I think that's where that – I don't think it's a goof. I think you just think you're better than that. Right? I mean, that's what I goof. I think you just think you're better than that.

Right? I mean, that's what I think. Boogie is an excellent... Well, not excellent because it's so transparent, but he is a serial... Liar. Emotional manipulator. I hope he doesn't have insurance on his house. I'm going to kill myself if you don't buy my comic book.

That's for real. But he would say that as like a you know just a shady way to get support yeah yeah are you gonna retire after this comic i think after one comic i'm done you know i think i've hit my heights no it's gonna be great we're gonna do a million of you don't want to overload the over i don't want to overload you guys too much you know and there's a lot of comics coming out that other you know you know, go read Alpha Corps. You'll probably enjoy that better. Alpha Corps looks like shit. How do you design a team of Green Lantern guys and not give them like a cool emblem that they all wear, right?

How do you combine the Justice League and the Green Lantern Corps and make them obvious bad guys and then it's just like some stupid Texan hillbilly and a spicy Latina and a generic cop. And a guy in a motorcycle helmet with a green jacket and green pants. And I'm like, can you at least put a big A on their costume or something? Anything that makes these emblematic superheroes that you want to buy merchandise.

I was way more into it when I thought they were bad cops. Like, I'm like, oh, yeah, these are evil, fucked up, corrupt cops, which they look like. They look like assholes. This is like the gang to the libertarian paradise. And they're cops, so they are assholes. Right. Yeah. They're obvious cops.

They fucking, they enter and they're looking down. They code like bad guys. Yes. Everything they're doing, they're bad guys. They absolutely code like bad guys. It's absolutely low shot. You're right. Isn't Eric supposed to hate the cops as a libertarian?

Well, the problem is Eric's retarded, so he doesn't understand. Fake libertarians, I think people should vote up. Yeah. Maybe because they're super. They're better than regular cops. The Ice Home comic really seems to think that cops are good guys, though.

There's no corrupt cops in that. If anything, a guy just trying to live by the libertarian ideal of having a private business and selling drugs to the community is being unfairly chased down by the evil Isom. Do you think that Eric July has internalized his, I mean, has been bruck broken by the cops, like that he's internalized the parenting of the police as his own father because he didn't have a father, so that being disciplined by the police, that's why he's always acting out as a gangbanger, doing crimes to get attention from the father, which is the police figure. No, I think it's far simpler than that.

Okay. I think he just realizes that right-wing people play into copaganda, bullshit, and Blue Lives Matter. See, my racism is like refined and complex, and yours is like, black people in the drive-thru, am I right? I'm not racist. Everybody was mad at you on the biggest problem review of the Marvels where you said Muslim is not a race, which is correct, but then you said Mexican is a race. Yes.

And there's a bunch of comments saying Mexican isn't a race. It's a race. What do they mean? It's not fucking Chicano. Hispanic is a race? Is that what they mean? I mean, not really. Okay, go find somebody from Ecuador and tell them that they're the same Race as Mexicans

I don't know why there was multiple comments And they all said you were racist And I was like well Dick is Mexican I can be racist Say whatever you want My problem Dick again is fake retirements And also how did the Alpha Corps Not have like an emblem

Like that's obvious You gotta give them like a cool logo When I buy a Green Lantern shirt With just the Green Lantern logo on it It's like cool right not have like an emblem. Like that's obvious. You got to give him like a cool logo. When I buy a Green Lantern shirt with just the Green Lantern logo on it, it's like cool, right? It's like, yeah, it's the Green Lantern symbol. Like it's iconic. Superman has the Superman symbol.

It's a paramilitary group. Don't they have like a challenge coin, a flag? Yeah, exactly. Like a patch. They can have a patch on the arm. That's how military groups work. Same with Isam. The only identifying emblem is that he has a cross on his dick. You're like, I think you're doing

superheroes wrong. Wouldn't the tailor say something? You want to put this up on the screen? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have to watch this trailer. It's so bad. Let's do it. Then I'll do my other problem. I haven't watched the full trailer yet. Oh, you haven't? No. Okay.

I like to be surprised. So what's... They look... Okay, who's drawing all these things? When did that guy become black? Was that guy always black? I don't know. Wait, the guy with the helmet, was he black?

I remember him being white. I don't know. Did he change him to black? Let's see here. Maybe I'm crazy. I mean, I guess he was wearing a helmet. I thought he was like Hispanic, that guy. I thought they were all kind of

tan. So... She's got laser whips. The other guy is just like Superman. She's Wonder Woman, but Mexican. And the other guy... Okay, so they have like kind of super suits, but again, the guy with the helmet is just wearing a jacket. I'm like, dude, you got to give him something.

He just has it. That's it. It's not even like a design. Oh, God. This is taking me back to Maddox. When we were working on that cartoon for Fox, we're sitting around trying to come up with the characters, and we come up with the guys that are based on us. Sure.

And that was funny enough. But then we get to the girl, and he just starts going like, yeah, and she likes hot sauce. She really likes hot sauce. I'm like, that's not a personality trait. Yeah, what is it? Okay. Yeah, and she likes a big enchilada. I. Yeah, what is... Okay. Okay. It's like a quirk. Yeah, and she likes like a big enchilada.

I'm like, what are you... What is this? Was the character Hispanic? Is this like a sexual thing? No, it's a white girl. She's like, yeah, she could really put down an enchilada, like a big enchilada. I'm like, man, I don't know who this is for. Yeah.

But... Did he want like a comic routine where she's constantly eating for some reason? That's what this guy reminds me of. Yeah. He's got a jacket. He's got a jacket. A green jacket. I mean, it kind of just looks like a guy putting on regular stuff anybody could own.

And this weird chin strap hat. Yeah. It's not comfortable. No. I got to say, if he is black, did you have to give him the really defined lips, you know? Vito, that's totally fine. That's totally fine. Um, do you notice anything about her?

What am I looking at? What? Do you notice anything? Does anything jump out at you? Not, I mean, she's got nice looking tits. Exactly. Nothing jumps out at you. Yeah.

Imagine if it did. Imagine how much better. You want the tits to be bigger? Just imagine. Okay. Just imagine if you were like, whoa, wow. They're well defined. They got a nice shadow under them. That clearly establishes that they're popping out a little bit.

But it took you like a while. All right. Let me see this trailer. Maybe they look better in the trailer. All right. Alpha Core is here. It's time for the Alpha Core. Click the one below it. The Let's Go button doesn't work. Yeah, well, half this website's broken. In Floor Spark Text.

Floor Spark can be an unpredictable city. But fluency doesn't mitigate its problems. Okay. Did you hear that? Fluency doesn't mitigate its problems. Did you hear that? Fluency doesn't mitigate its problems? Affluency. Affluency. Okay.

Affluency, yeah. So this guy's got a fancy way of talking for some reason. No, the voice actor just didn't know how to say that word. Oh, he said it. Affluency. Affluency, yeah. It's not correct. I didn't hear him say it the first time.

In some ways, it amplifies him. The mix is really bad. This is why we're deployed. Yaira again. What is this character? Did you believe him? Yeah!

Yeah! But we've seen better days oh my god oh you missed yeah gyro's winning eric's gotten so much uh so many miles out of that one fight. Yeah, from the original thing. How many pages was this even in? I some one.

Was it like five pages? Two pages or something. Yeah. So then he looks like a fucking bad guy when he comes out, and he's holding her. This is a very inappropriate way to hold somebody on the job. And they all look evil. Yeah.

They're literally fighting a blonde white woman, which is the most easy way to establish a villain in any movie or TV show. It looks like she's on her way home from the gym. Right? Like Men in Black style. And these awful cops. You bring up a good point, though, is like, could he not

have written a new script for this? Like, new stuff that they're doing? He has to go back to ISOM 1? Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. But you know why he's doing that is because he wants to present this to investors as we got to make the isom uh animation do you think i should make an isom uh porn no parody porn why because it's funny is it isom i suck off i suck off men porn parody isom porn parody i suck off men i think it's getting a little too involved.

I think the amount of effort. I'll do it. I think the amount of effort that would take would. Go nuts. Ask the poll. Wouldn't be funny if I made a I saw him parody porno. I think it's one of those situations where there's not enough people who would understand it.

You know, I only care about my audience. If you're making it for the audience, sure. It just seems like I'm not wasting effort on this audience. Where he comes in and... He's slovenly mubs. He comes in. Sucks off Darren, obviously. If you made it like a ten minute like OnlyFans clip, okay, like a quick, easy thing. Boom, boom, boom.

Hire two black guys to fuck each other. Could be any race. Have one of them come in in a helmet and a green jacket. Have the other one come in with a big cross on his dick. He could go down on his niece. I could put that scene in there. Or he goes to his sister's house and talks. That should be an adult woman.

An adult, okay. But we would know. Okay, here's the only scene. And then he fucks Santon. See, now it's getting too elaborate. You get one scene. Three. I get three scenes

Double up The only scene I want Is he goes I don't know He's gotta have a line Something like And then Blood Ruth Comes in and sprays

Period Well he should Fuck Blood Ruth And it should end With blood just squirting Out of her vagina Everywhere And it looks like

Fucking Carrie Yeah You just need one shot Where he's got his Crotch zipper And it's got a big cross on it. Yeah. And he unzips the cross and a dick just flops out.

Small though. Small. A black guy with a small dick. Well, good luck. Because he just sucks guys off. Yeah. You're going to have to get a white stand in for that. And then his niece is a trans woman, so he sucks her off too.

Well. That's funny. That's funny. That's funny. You thought the grave shit was bad? See? There's so many other places to take it. It's just money. It's just money that I need to do these plans.

That's it. That's nothing. I mean, maybe you'll be the first guy out there, you know? Because, you know, once ISOM takes off and it's a huge global success, nobody else can make the porn parody because it's already done. What else happens in this? Okay, so these clearly

evil-looking guys are beating up a more defensive Bond lady. And floating. They can all fly. How can they all fly but ISOM can't? Then why are we just now debriefing? This mission is not complete. I only know

ever. Our lack of data collection is a problem. Valdez, I'm aware of your investigative talents. It just is the dialogue from a comic. He couldn't come up with any like new exciting lines that build upon like a trailer. This universe

trailer. Yeah. Does this guy just like exciting lines that build upon this universe. Yeah. Does this guy just like... If I was going to make a trailer, I'd write cool new lines and stuff. It's an interesting way to explore this universe. Not a lady complaining about data collection, which was one of the worst lines from ISOM.

We really got to work on our data collection. That famous line from ISOM 2. I'm well aware of our data collection. That famous line from I Saw Him Too. I'm well aware of your data collection. Who's writing this? I don't think. If Eric's writing this, then I have no idea. I bet my porn parody will have better writing.

It probably will. I'll write the shit out of that. We really need to work on our data collection. The knee scene, the trans knees. That's so funny. Come on. I'm not touching that with a 10-foot pole. He comes in.

I saw him. I got there already. I know. All right. I got it. Your mom said that you was having some trouble since your dad left. Okay. Oh, I understand the concept.

What are you going to do? I saw him. You just suck off men. Well, in your case, I'll make an exception. I'll make an exception for you, my trans niece. No, he can't say niece. It has to be just, you know. It could be incest.

It could be adult incest. They get sketchy about that stuff. Oh, is it hard to sell? Yeah, a little bit. Has it gotten sketchy? I don't know. The overpopularity of incest porn. Vote it up. There's a stepson you can do.

All right, I got it. I'm just saying, I know a lot about credit card processing and stuff. That's a big no-no for them. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Yeah, that would make sense. Braxwell spoke highly of you, and that's why you're on. Why does this little dickhead have his visor on?

Yeah, he doesn't take that off back at the... Is he like Geordi? Why don't you pop your shades off there? Is he blind without that? Did he tell this guy to sound like Optimus Prime? I don't know. Autobots, transform and roll out.

Is he like Tim Henson? Local law enforcement handles itself very well. That's Isom. It's not even Alphacore. Okay, so he's definitely just... What does this have to do with local law enforcement? He's just trying to pitch a cartoon to the Daily Wire.

Isn't Glenn Beck starting his own Daily Wire Plus type thing? Yeah, I think so. Okay. Now after he becomes Jewish, right? Didn't he say he's going to become Jewish? Glenn Beck is going to become Jewish? Glenn Beck said he prayed to God that he would become Jewish. Okay.

Well, once he finishes that, I mean, he's starting a TV network, so he's already halfway to being Jewish. Here's what I think is the pretty obvious game plan, is that Eric July is talking to Glenn Beck and saying, let me make a six-animated or four or four episode animated series of my idiotic comic book for whatever stupid right wing television network you're putting together. If this shit got turned into a cartoon, that'd be so funny. See, that's what people don't understand, is they're like, oh, that would make the haters so mad.

And I'm like, no, as I've said before, please keep making comic books. Please. It's fucking hilarious. So this is long for us. Make a cartoon. Handling their own. Yeah. But there are those with abilities.

Some believe themselves to be good. Others don't even attempt to act as if they are. Okay. Guys. Okay guys. Either way. Actually this is not cracked. Okay.

We're involved. This is a jacket though. Lame guy. Not everyone will agree with our status. Huh. Okay. So that table was glued to the ground? Is it a table or is it a pillar?

No, it's like a lab bench. It's a wooden. You're getting attacked by it. You're enemy weapon guy. You're getting attacked by a magma monster. What's the first thing you'd use to defend yourself? Of course That can be said for anything Wait, he's literally using it as a shield?

Well, let's hope He has like a twink haircut He does? The alpha core guy? Like Quail Man Yeah Um, yeah. And that is.

May I remind you both. We're Alpha Corps. And failure is not what we do. And then he's got the Marvel title logo. Yeah, he's got Rip Averse Studios, but if you look closely, you can see that all the pictures are like stretched out because they don't

fit. Well, I'll say this. I mean, he paid a lot of money for this stupid thing. Looks good. Yeah, looks cool. Yeah. Hey, animators do good work. All Eric has to do is hire people who aren't him and also stop writing it and managing it in any way.

Maybe something will come of it. Find a guy who can write and put him in charge of the whole thing and then just walk away and you might be okay. That's cool. And kill off Isom because he's the most boring fucking character that ever existed. I suck off men. That will be the parody.

That trans thing, man. People are going to go, what the fuck? But he sucks off men. What do you need me to say? Do you need me to say this is the greatest idea you ever had? It's a good idea. It's a good example of a twist. It's a great twist.

I'll be like the M. Night Shyamalan of porn. Why don't you do a parody comic book? Nah, it's got to be way grosser than that. All right, you're right. It's got to be actual fucking and sucking. Okay, backseat murderers. Okay. That's my problem.

So that guy, did you see that cool guy that shot those terrorists on the highway in Panama or something? Yes, I did. And everyone's like judging him. Like, oh, well, you know. I don't know if that makes you a backseat murderer. You're saying if you were in that shoes, you would not have murdered. Guys are like, oh, maybe you just get in a fight with him

and punch him out. You don't got to kill somebody. It's like, oh, okay. Fucking Mr. Monday Morning Murderer over here. Monday Morning Murderer. Right. Monday Morning Murderer. Right? Where was it? Panama?

Yeah, but apparently he is an American. Of course. Yeah, of course. Take business in your own hands. 77 years young. Oof. They got to let him out for this. They're not going to let him out.

Come on. Look at all this backed up traffic, man. I'm so glad that they got all this footage of it. Look at this shit. All these semis. Is this going to be one of those situations where we watch news footage or a channel gets deleted for some reason? Oh, fuck. You're right.

Sorry. Isn't that... You're right. Yeah. That's what happened to my other channel. Yeah. Great. So we can't even talk about...

Well, we can talk about it, but we're not allowed to look at it. Good old YouTube. It's like people can't just have something nice. They got to ruin it and say like they could do it better. You know? They could have handled those protesters. Oh, well, you know, just because they're terrorizing people, just because they're holding everyone hostage doesn't mean that they should someone, a brave man should kill them. We should change the laws to make it a hostage

situation if you're stuck in traffic. It is. It is. 100%. I don't want to be here. I want to freely progress through the United States as is my right as a citizen. If this ever happens to me, I just want everybody to know farmers market terrorism. This is the move. If you're being held hostage

by whatever kind of protest, it doesn't matter what protest they're doing. It could be any protest. If they're blocking the road, it's a murder felony. Whatever. It's evil. If I'm in that traffic, I will say I'm having a heart attack. No matter what.

So if you get Gucci. Don't you have to fake a heart attack? I've driven myself to the hospital thinking I was having a heart attack. I know how to do it. Well, I was going to say, I mean, it doesn't just apply to... What do you call it?

It doesn't just apply to protesters. Anything that blocks off a street... Take it. It's your mouse. Okay. I was going to say this video should be one we bring up here. Yeah. How do I bring up a video? Just click it. What are you dragging onto

OBS4? And then what do I switch over to? Yeah, but we can't, no, we can't show this shit. No, he didn't kill anybody. It's on the fuck, it doesn't matter, it's endangering people's lives. I think this is different. Show a little bit. Look, right there. No, I think this is different. Right there. Cause it doesn't hit there. No, I think this is different. Right there.

Because it doesn't hit anybody. It's encouraging violence, though, against kids. It's not encouraging violence. We're just scared. Well, we are. Yeah. I showed that guy. That guy who, that teacher stole his Switch. Yeah.

And he got it. Thank God. He stopped her. He stopped that thief. And incapacitated her before the police could apprehend her. Yes. I showed that, and I lost my chance for that. Well, that was a good video of, again, a good Samaritan.

Nobody's perfect, all right? A bunch of parade psychopaths governed by the state. The enemy of good is perfect. Yes. So a guy goes and does a heroic thing. His intentions are heroic. Yes. And what he does is heroic,

don't, you know, shit on him. Because you think you could have done a slightly better job. I mean, now, every time one of these protesters wants to do a thing, they're going to think, like, well, what if a crazy old guy shows up? What if Santa Claus appears? Yeah, what if Santa Claus...

I mean, we got to make this a thing. Like, next time you see those Just Stop Oil protesters, like, trying to tear down a painting, just cold cock them. What is that? Jack off on them. Piss on them. Yeah, do it.

Yeah, piss on them. I have to piss, and I'm so... Oh, my God! But I want to know more about your cause. Yeah, tell me about your cause while I just piss all over you. I'm pissing! Someone stop! Help!

This never happened to me before. I don't know. Is it the bystander effect? People just will not do anything. It takes one brave man to step forward and do what needs to be done. Yeah, I don't know what's going to happen with this. I mean, that guy's

going to go to jail. Oh, man. That would suck. I can already tell you that's what's going to happen. We've got to bust them out. Something's wrong in America. You can't for some... Well, it's not even America.

Something's wrong. If it was... You know what? Isn't Panama like a communist country? It's the commies. It's a worldwide issue. Yeah. People are blocking roads.

And finally, but a strong American man went to this godless... He's a big guy. ...country. I don't think Panama's communist. guy. He's probably on testosterone. I don't think Panama's communist. I don't know what they are. No, I don't think they are. He went to this godless society that worships golden idols and sacrifices children.

And he said, no more. There will be. He's like, ah, fuck it. Fuck you. Well, don't you always have that, like, you know, what age would you have to be to just go, I mean, I'm old enough. I don't got that much time left. Probably like 35. Time to climb a clock tower and see what happens.

You know? Why not? No, a clock tower is different. A clock tower is a different scenario? Yeah, this is fine. You can't go into a dormitory full of nurses and just start strangling them? No. Who was that guy?

That was an old guy, though. I don't know. I try not to learn anything about serial killers. I don't want people to get the wrong idea. That's what made that other guy into a serial killer. I think that guy, I think Gacy, maybe it was Gacy. No. Dahmer?

One of them, his mom was a nurse. Oh. And his mom. Ted Bundy. And then after all these nurses got killed by a different serial killer that made his nurse mom crazy and abused him because she hated men. And then that guy became a serial killer because of that.

It's all because of women. My point is There goes my hero. Watch him as he goes. Yeah, you would have murdered him differently. I get it. You would have gotten in he goes Yeah you would have Murdered him differently I get it You would have gotten a fight Or you would have like You know

It's Human life's You would have had like An argument with him Until he died or something Fuck off God You fixed the problem

Stop worrying about I'm just thinking about A related problem I don't know if I want to Bring it up Because it would take too long But I've been getting lectures

on Kyle Rittenhouse again, but I won't go into that. There's another one that everyone was trying to backseat murder. Yeah. Those were great murders, man. Yeah. Well, there were murders in the Rittenhouse case. I'm in the drop zone. Done. That was a self-defense situation. Who cares? And maybe this

was a self-defense situation. Again. I don't want to get into Kyle Rittenhouse, so instead I will get into a problem I call unqualified applicants. Okay. This is when I, as an employer of men, who reaches

out to creatives who could potentially assist me, I go, hey, I need like a video. I'm looking for video editors, right? Is this about Tony from Hack the Movies? This is not about Tony from Hack the Movies. I don't know why you assume that.

I'm curious. I love Tony. Tony told me I was big-leaguing him today. I'm like, I was just fucking around. He's like, you got to work harder on your YouTube channel. I'm like, oh, my YouTube channel where I shit out a video about Brie Larson in two seconds and you got to work hard on your video to get half'm like, oh, my YouTube channel where I shit out a video about Brie Larson in two seconds and you gotta work hard on your video to get half the views.

That's funny. If only you guys were in the mob. It's like two fat Italian guys. I love Tony. Me and Tony should be podcast and we have a good If you haven't watched it yet, over on the Hack the Movies channel, me and him watched Face Off and it's a great video. You should put that one on

and listen to it. It's a good one. all right so i go hey i need a video editor and i get like a million dms same with that thing where i said i want a writing partner okay i get a million dms from everybody how'd that go and i go well i don't want the writing partner thing i'm not even i'm still getting emails about it yeah i don't read them at all because uh what do you expect would happen i don't know because i thought people would understand you know intrinsically that i'm too good for them uh no that's the joke with the video that though with the video no i mean it's true i would want someone who has okay again unqualified applicants yeah you gotta come to me and you got to go, well, I've done this. I've published this.

I've put out this. And there are a couple of guys who have legitimate problems under their belt. And there's other guys who go, I'd love to be your writing partner. And I go, oh, cool. Do you have like a background in comedy or have you written anything? And they go, well, in high school, I took a creative writing class. And I'd love to send you this book report on the wind in the willows, which I think

really establishes what I can do. Or again, I went looking for a video editor and I go, well, okay. Have you never done anything? Do you know, why'd you put it on Twitter? Do you know, after effects to use a Adobe premiere? Do you, what do you, what do you edit in? And they go, well, I edited an iMovie. I'm very good at putting up the iMovie titles. Here's my, what do you call it? Here's my freshman high school, me and my buddies playing Minecraft together. If you want to watch that,

I edited in a lot of sound effects. Whenever we die, there's like an explosion on the screen. I'm like, okay, well, it's not exactly what I was looking for. Or you just get guys who go, I go, well, do you edit video? What do you edit? And they you edit and they go well i haven't ever done it before yeah but i've always wanted to learn yeah that's cool and i go did did

you think when i said i needed a video editor that i meant i was offering free video editing classes for you yeah but it's because you're cheap like you don't want to go on like a freelance site and hire somebody with qualifications you want to like, like, get free help from, like, a fan. No, I pay everybody. And second of all, I pay people better than you do. I don't have video editors. No, but you have, like, freelance people do stuff. What the fuck are you talking about?

You're the one constantly talking shit at me. Who do I have? Who do you know that I have freelance relationships with? I don't I don't know who am I paying for freelancing there you go you're not paying anybody for freelancing what'd you pay what'd you pay me for those incredible posters I don't remember that was Carl's that was a Carl's Carl's decision so that was up to him what do you call it uh I pay people I mean I wish I could pay them more, but honestly, the videos, you know. Me too.

God, if I could only pay people more, but mine is so tight. The video only makes a thousand bucks. What am I going to give them? Yeah. You know, a couple hundred, but. What are you editing? Well, because I. Something about like Star Wars.

Yeah. Like a lot of my Star Wars videos, I've had like some help. Some of the big, not the two biggest ones ones, but some of the littler ones. I've reached out to people and had them edit chapters. I'm finally going to finish my big Ghostbusters review, which is where this debacle started. For some reason in my head, I'm like, clearly if anyone reaches out to me as a video editor,

they must know kind of what they're doing, right? I would just send them a portion of voiceover and I'd go, well, just do the best you can and then send it to me and I'll, you know, fix it up or whatever. That was a mistake. That was a nightmare. What'd you get?

I got back shit where they'd just be like, I didn't do these two minutes. I'm like, oh, well, why not? And they're like, I just couldn't think of what to put there. And I'm like, all right, well, that's kind of an important part of the editing process is figuring out what to put there. Or I'd be like, I was like, here is an HD rip of the movie. Use this for the clips. Like, pull from this.

Yeah. And then they'd set it in, and I'm like, why is this 480p resolution? They're like, well, I got all the clips off YouTube. Yeah, that's fine. Instead of just ripping it from the movie directly. Some people can't tell. Some people can't tell. It actually drives me nuts.

My girlfriend's like that. Yeah. She rents everything in SD because it's cheaper. Right. It looks like shit. I can't tell. It looks terrible. Yeah.

What? Especially with, again, I'm doing these video essays. I'm like, I want it to look HD. I don't want to be one of these guys using shitty footage. Yeah. Look, you've never had any unqualified applicants in your life? You run projects. Yeah.

Yeah. Not to this degree, though. I'm not always trying to get shit for free, though. I am not trying to get shit for free. I pay all these people. Yeah, you're trying to get, like, writing partners and stuff for free. Okay, if it's a- If you're like, oh, if only the right guy will come to me if I sit here.

If you're a writing partner, the idea is it would be a 50-50 split, I assume, if we get any projects made. Yeah, but it's like a weird way to go about it. I said I need a writing partner. It didn't mean I'm taking applications for a writing partner. It's just been- Then what was the point of it? You know, if you say I need a house painter, it doesn't mean-

Oh, I'd really like lunch. And then like, why is everyone giving me suggestions for lunch? What the fuck? If I said, you know, man, I really need to find a house painter. You'd get a bunch of suggestions. Yeah, but I wouldn't get

a bunch of guys on Twitter going, hey, can I come paint your house? I guess not. You know, you might get someone reaching out and being like, hey, if you're actually trying

to get your house painted, here's a good place you could go to. It's me. Yeah, well, maybe it would be. Maybe it is a local contract okay you get what i'm saying uh unqualified look and i'm you know some people who have sent me messages you probably are qualified and honestly there's been some guys reached out i'm like maybe i could work with a guy like this i don't know so everyone send veto a message i've got like a million I've got like a million of them Like a joke message

Whatever Or lie Say you're overqualified You worked for like Industrial Light and Magic For ten years Yeah say you wrote on All the Star Wars things

And then send him back shit Like lead him on For the whole Like interview thing Whatever you're doing Let me see if any of these Okay Well that one's not funny All I hear is What a great bit He's, uh... Okay.

Well, that one's not funny. All I hear is, What a great bit. What a great bit I'm doing here. Fill in time while I look for this. There was a funny one. Do you make them do, like, tryouts? Yeah, actually, for the video editing.

Now I do. Now you do. Now I send them... Big league in everybody. Tony was right. Tony from Hackney. Well, I feel bad making somebody do a thing, but honestly, it's like I can't. If you haven't made a video essay before, I have to be like, look. And that's the reason when I don't go to like a Fiverr site is I want people who've watched my videos before and like understand them and know the style.

Okay, whatever. Yeah, I just want to take advantage of everyone. That sounds like it. Okay. You got to ask them to rate their abilities on a scale of 1 to 10. And then you have a number in your head, and if they guess that number, they're in. You know what? I'm not going to humiliate any of these people, but I love them all.

Why? What was it? I don't know. Some guy linked me to a Spotify. How does that help me? What did you write on Spotify? Maybe it's a podcast where he talks about editing. I think that's a guy who actually has edited for me before.

He's a good guy. Point is, it's mostly, no, I paid all these people, except the ones who did the free test, which I know you're not supposed to do, but you can do whatever you want, as it turns out. And I found some editors who are good through that process, but there was

a lot of guys who, again, were like, I watch your videos. That's enough qualification. I'm i'm like no no you need again if you're editing an iMovie like come on you know you know you're not a video editor guys to edit one of your it's been so long since i had an editor that i can't even like guess it you can't even estimate it well i pay them by the length of the amount of voiceover they're doing. Does that vary a lot? Like by 10? It could be like a five-minute clip or like a 12-minute clip.

But I think it was like $20 per one minute of voiceover you edit. So it could be like $100? Yeah, if they do a five-minute portion of the video, it's $100. How long would that take, them? Longer than, I don't know. It depends. Minimum wage are they making? Probably. Yeah, it sucks. It's shitty work. It's hobbyist work. But again, I don't

make a lot of money. I pay them a bonus if the video goes crazy. You give them like a couple pins or something? I send them more money if the video goes crazy. I think I even say it ahead of time. I say, look, I don't know if the video's going to perform, but if the video does well, I think I even say it ahead of time. I say, look, I don't know if the video's going to perform, but if the video does well, I'll give you this bonus.

I pay people really good. What is this I'm a cheapskate narrative? I don't know. You're always asking for free shit. You sound like Eric Gly's fan base. He goes, Vito isn't even paying his artist, and he's taking advantage, and his book has three less pages than I saw.

Did you see the guy who was calculating the number of pages in my book times the amount that you pay for it? He's like, Eric's book is $35 for 96 pages. Vito's book is $25 for 56 pages. That means Eric's book is 70 cents a page, and Vito's book is 85 cents a page. That is a ripoff. That is a ripoff. Yeah, and I'm like, well, yeah, but my book isn't a complete piece of fucking shit. Less value. Is 70 cents a page. And Vito's book is 85 cents a page. That's how you measure toilet paper. Yeah, and I'm like, well, yeah, but my book isn't a complete piece of fucking shit. So.

Yeah. And you get trading cards, which you don't get with ISOM. He got really mad when I made that point. He's like, so you're saying the trading cards are worth how much? What do you value the trading cards at? I'm like, $1,000. You're getting $1,000 in value. I can't believe how retarded those guys are.

They're fucking nuts. It's really weird. They think he's their dad. They have to, like, all their profile. You said, you think some of them are fake. I don't know. The ones that are posting, like, all day and they'll answer everything, those are fake. I think they're just, like, super autistic.

No, the guys who bought $900 worth of stuff and they're posting it and then they respond to everything, those are fake. There are guys who are spending thousands of dollars on ice time shit, but they're not responding to everything. I think the easiest explanation is that those guys have never gotten any Twitter engagement on anything else. So they're like, hey, people are responding to me and I finally have something to do. Maybe, but then what's their social media manager doing all day? on anything else. So they're like, hey, people are responding to me,

and I finally have something to do. Maybe, but then what's their social media manager doing all day? Nothing. Don't they have two social media managers? Yeah, because they're being fake profiles on Twitter, arguing with dickheads. It's possible. My problem is unqualified applicants. Okay.

I didn't mean for it to only apply to me. I assumed Dick would be able to help me find some other examples, but instead the problem was nailed down to... problem is unqualified applicants okay i didn't mean for it to only apply to me i assumed dick would be able to help me find some other examples but yeah it's the problem was nailed down yeah but that's on you you gotta like learn how to weed them out because of course you're gonna get people who are not qualified though yeah but you gotta like before you send off any all right look have some experience before you fire off an email you gotta send them to like a form that says how many videos have you done? If it's less than this, don't. That's a good idea.

Then you can just filter and get rid of them. Yeah. Still taking applications for my writing partner. How come there's nobody in LA? Must be a girl. Must be hot. Cause you're supposed to be friends with somebody first. Yeah, but I don't make friends, so I'm fucked.

Well, you gotta work on that. Or am I gonna meet people? You gotta go outside. You gotta go outside of your house. And go where? To a coffee shop. Oh, and what, to sit there? And pretend to be, ah, hey everybody! I'm just writing my script over here! Check me out!

Is that how it goes? Anybody else writing a script? Yeah, because there'll be some other idiot there who's pretending to write their script. I do have a buddy, but he's not a writer. He's an animator. Nah, you can't write with a non-writer. I know. It doesn't work. But I want him to make the Super Killer animated promo, which we're going to put out.

For free. For free. No, not for free. I would pay him. I asked him how much it would cost. Pay him a little bit, would cost It'd cost a nightmare Yeah how much did Eric spend on that He must have spent like $200,000

Yeah He said he's poached the animators He doesn't know what that means Poached And also for some reason You didn't know this that he's like A lot of his guys are like Brazilian artists

Oh they are? Yeah He's got this Brazilian art Well that's the other thing man Everyone's like Oh he gets books out so fast It's incredible And I'm like well yeah

Cause he's paying a bunch of like Cheap Brazilian talent To like do all the fill in work Mmm What? Okay Am I coping? Well, yeah, because you're saying like Marvel gets books out every month

Because they got, you know, a human there doing it Well, I talked to Ethan and he said those books are done like a year ahead of time At Marvel? All the Marvel and DC stuff He's like, oh yeah, like we would like work on the Green Lantern book And it wouldn't, you know They would work for a whole year and then Yeah, I guess I guess like, you know. They would work for a whole year and then.

Yeah, I guess. I guess like, you know, they prepare like a pipeline so if they have delays, the books are still ready to go. Why don't you take a drop? Look, a couple pictures. I don't know, man. I'm not trying.

So. There you go. Pretty good. Put it up. Make some money. All right. My problems are backseat murderers and backseat murderers.

Tinnitus. And tinnitus. And your problems are what? Unqualified applicants and what do they call it? Fake retirements. Yeah. Good problems, guys. Where do you vote?

Biggestproblem.show. Biggestproblem.show. God damn it. Oh, you're doing it. No, sorry. I had an idea. Should we reset the... No.

What? Well, because the problem with the voting is that all the old problems get more votes because they've been around longer. This is the worst deja vu ever. Can we depreciate the old vote? No, that's not how it works. Why don't we reset it every year at the end of the year? You have to vote.

That was the winner of that year. If you like a problem, go vote on it. That's the deal. Yeah. I mean, you think it would make sense that as we get more viewers, they would vote on the problems. I can filter it by, like, this year or this month. That might be interesting. What was the biggest problem by year, by month?

By year, by month. I'll do that. So not a terrible idea from me. I think people would like to know what were the top problems of 2023. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Okay. Let's see here.

Here's an editor. Man, y'all are wasting time trying to edit down that movie reviews. They're funny as they are. We don't give a shit. All right. Go fuck are, we don't give a shit. Alright, go fuck yourself. Was that ripping on me because I didn't put up the movie review? I think so. What happened there? I fell asleep the second

I got home from the movie. But you were tweeting. No, I woke up at 3am tweeted a bunch of stuff as I was lying in bed and then I fell back asleep again. Oh. You just wake up and like are tweeting? I had like a moment of like, I can't fall back asleep. Let me play on my phone.

Yeah. But I was not. Yeah, I was not in the mood. It wasn't, oh, let me wake up and then run to the computer and edit a fucking movie review. It was, yeah, I'll just fuck around until I fall back asleep. All right. Hey, Dick.

Hey, Vito. The biggest problem in the universe is the fucking bullshit when it says x.com formerly known as twitter we all know it was fucking twitter we all know it's still twitter we all know it was twitter we know what x.com is we know it was a weird porn slenderman but we know it's twitter now so like can we stop who needs this clarification that it was Twitter? Just fucking stop. It's time to stop. Does anyone call it X?

No, they call it X, formerly known as Twitter. I don't call it that. What do you call it, Twitter? Twitter. Yeah, but, like, newspapers have to go, oh, on X, formerly known as Twitter. Well, I'm not reading newspapers, so thankfully I've avoided that discourse. Yeah. I still think it's so annoying. I still think it's so annoying. I still think it's like a joke.

Like at some point he's going to go, yeah, you guys are right. Elon Musk has this like obsession with X. Like that being the global dominating company. It's so stupid. I will say I own the steel stock, United States. I forget what it's called. U.S. Steel or something, and their ticker is just X. So when he renamed the company, it spiked because everyone's like,

oh, Elon Musk is going to buy them just so he can own the ticker, man. He might. He might. Okay, here we go. Stock market morons, vote them up. It was like the Disney earning call happened this week, and a bunch of YouTubers were like, oh, they're going to tank in stock value because all their movies are bad,

and they're too woke, and South Park had a bid on them. Oh, yeah. And it's annoying because it's like, well, why can't their movies just be bad? Why do you also need their business and stock price to reflect that? Also, I think the stock spiked after their earnings, so. Oh, good. I think it was at 80. It's back at 87.

Yeah, well, it's the classic thing of, like, again, the fucking conservative boycotts where they wait, like, a day, and they're like, see? Oreo cookies are down because they made gay Oreo cookies. And you're like, Nabisco stock is in the toilet. It's over. They did that with Nike. They're like, see, because they hired Colin Kaepernick. And then Nike stock went to the fucking stratosphere. It's like, guys, you're stupid little.

You got one. You did get one, and I said you might get one. But what do they think is going to happen? Like that the stock is going to go to zero, and then like Obama will explode? Yeah. The devil will come out and go, the the devil will come out all the gay will come out of him that's what it is um they all just i don't know man it's the conservative

boycotts they're so stupid yes even the bud light one you're like what exactly did you accomplish well now they know not to hire a lady to translate or we'll get mad. Okay. What about when Gina Carano got fired? That's different. That's free speech. That's free speech. She needs to have her job.

Well, shouldn't What's Her Name have free speech and be able to do a Bud Light commercial? No. No. No. Because we hate that beer, that beer is piss But, but, but They should be making ads for us Yeah That's cool man

Why don't you fucking blow your brains out Um Okay, favorite part of the show Hey Jake Vito I've been a subscriber of this show since I think episode like Two or three of the original. This is the first time I've wanted to call in. Wow.

And it's my favorite part about the Vito weight loss competition is that he's got to lose 13 pounds in a month of Thanksgiving. Good luck, Vito. Oh, shit. I didn't even think of that. Are you going to do it? Am I going to lose 13 pounds in the Thanksgiving month? This month, yeah. You have to do it. Why do I have to do it? I I going to lose 13 pounds in the Thanksgiving month? This month, yeah. You have to do it.

Why do I have to do it? I'm going to try. I'm trying. You're just going to not get 800 bucks? That's like rent. I know. It's a lot of money. I know it's a lot of money.

And you're just not going to get it because you're not trying hard enough. I'm trying pretty hard. You've got to try all the way, man. Look, I'm drinking a Diet Coke. I did notice that. Did you? Yeah, when you said a Diet Coke. I always drink the Diet. I drink Diet Coke. I drink Diet

Soda. Are you gonna make it? Are you gonna get We'll see what happens and if I don't make it, everyone can just endlessly complain because they're vicariously living through my failure for some fucking reason. I get so many fucking... I'm really rooting for you, Vito. I really believe you can do it. Well, maybe I can't.

Those are jokes. Good. Stop. Stop. Stop it. I'll do what I can. Christ. At least I lost some weight. As long as it stays on a course, I'm happy. You gotta drop these 13 pounds, though.

I care more about the weight loss than I care about the $800. That's the point. No, you don't. Yes, I do. I want to lose weight, and it's happening, and I'm happy about that. You care more about, quote-unquote, losing weight than $800? I am happy that I have lost, what, 17 pounds?

17 pounds. I'm happy about that. More than $800? More than $800. Oh, look. So if you miss it by, like, half a pound, you'll be like, well, at least I lost all the weight. Okay, that'll suck. But I assume I'll miss it by much more than that because 13 pounds is a lot.

All right. I'll just fast. Yeah, do that. I'll tell you what. I'll go into my DMs for the hundreds of different fasts that have been... You should just eat carrot shavings mixed with almonds. And then put it up your ass and then take it out of your ass and make it into a juice. And there's a guy named Dr. Krogel Schnugenstein and he did it in Germany in the 1950s. Yeah, that's cool.

And everyone who adheres to that diet says they can see through time. And I'm like, okay, great. I'll just fucking do that then. So you won't even do that? It's like that guy who called in this show and I said, well, I want to Was it the call-in show that we did on Low Value Mail? And I was like, well, I'm just going to do cardio.

And he's like, no, don't do cardio. If you do cardio, it actually resets your fat cycle and then the lipids will be... And I was like, well, I'm just going to do cardio. And he's like, no, don't do cardio. If you do cardio, it actually resets your fat cycle, and then the lipids will be... And I'm like, that's true, though. You can't lose weight just doing cardio. You're not doing enough, either. You've got to do, like, three or four hours. Okay, I'll do three to four hours of cardio every day. Not half an hour. Because you're just sitting there

otherwise. You could be riding the bike. Well, every Wednesday, I've been streaming games, and people have been donating to the Fido Exercise Fund. What do you do with that? Well, every Wednesday I've been streaming games and people have been donating to the Vito Exercise Fund. What do you do with that? Well, as long as I get $50, I'll exercise that day. And if I don't get $50, I'll eat a candy bar. So I'm emotionally manipulating my audience.

So you've been making more than $800. That's why you don't care. I've made like $200 streaming. Don't give this fucking asshole. Only give Vito money if he's lost weight from the day before. Make him weigh himself. I put a ticker in the corner and it says Vito's exercise fund. I've made like 200 bucks guilt tripping people.

That's bullshit. You fucking simps. You fall for this shit. Well, guys, I don't know. That's disgusting. You fucking simps You fall for this shit Well guys I don't know That's disgusting I don't know if I can exercise tonight Unless we raise $50

Come on by youtube.com Slash Vito If you really want me to succeed Alright That's funny Hey what's this Evangelion one That's gotta be good I'm sorry

In front of God and everyone Did Vito just tell me that there's not that much crying and f and fucking evangelion who cries i don't think there's a single episode that does not involve crying it's like what 26 fucking episodes first episode is crying every single one involves at least two scenes of crime yeah they're usually done by Shinji, the main character, that's supposed to not be a shithead. Fucking hell. Anyway.

But the girls don't cry, so that's cool. I love you. The guy just cries the whole time. Because they're men. They're not men. Oh, you're dead. They don't act like women. Ray is an emotionless, soulless

being. And Asuka just goes comatose and ends up naked in a bathtub in the middle of Japan. A man. And then Shinji jerks off on her comatose body in the movie. Really? Yeah. You never seen that famous meme where he's got his

it's a scene from the movie where his hand's out, it's covered in his semen. No. He says, I'm disgusting. Why would I see that? Well, because people make memes out of it, and they go, oh, I got sticky ice cream all over my, yeah, Shinji hand. Cum hand? I don't even think you have to put cum.

The very beginning. It's like the first scene in the movie. Shinji jerking off on his comatose friend. in the movie. Shinji jerking off on his comatose friend. Hey, look. Look at the one. They added Hellman's mayo and a bunch of sandwich stuff under it. This is funny to you? That's pretty good.

Disgusting. He was just making a sandwich. He jerked off on Oscar. He jerked off on this woman with the blue hair? No, that's an edit. He didn't jerk off on Ray This one? Yeah that's the scene He goes and he visits his girl

This girl who's in the hospital He's like why won't you wake up? Why are you in a coma? I need you And then as he's shaking her Her tit pops out And then he rubs one out How big are her tits? They're like normal 14 year old girl tits

it's anime and then shinji rubs one out showing it from like the point of view of you that just jacked off it's very autistic okay uh that's how you start the best robot movie ever made yeah okay jerking off on 14 year olds let's uh let's do super chats that's how you start the best robot movie ever made. Yeah, okay. Jerking off on 14-year-olds. Let's do super chats. That's enough of this shit. Oh, wait, there's one more. Oh, there's one more? on YouTube short of someone doing basically exactly what Vito did to his cat.

And guess what? The comments were turned off because everybody was probably commenting, you just raped that cat. They didn't use a Q-tip, though. They used their finger, which was even worse. Okay. See, that's way worse. It was even fucking worse, man. I did not use my finger.

Even worse? That's way worse. That's a million times worse. Why are you putting your finger up at cats? See, that's gross. Pussy. Q-tip's a million times worse. Why are you putting your finger up a cat's? See, that's gross. Pussy. Q-tip's fine. Clit.

Is the clit in the same spot it is with a woman? I have no idea where a cat's clitoris is. Well, you got something. It's not on top of their head. I know that. You have some idea. Okay, I have some idea of where a cat's. You could guess.

I don't want to say I have some idea. You could pin the clit on it if it was on a mat or something. Sure, pin the clit on the cat. I'd have a... Yeah. I could guess. Probably right here. I could make an educated guess. Is it outside?

Does a cat have a clitoris? Is that a thing? Do all animals have clitorises? Yeah. They all got a penis type of thing. Penis type thing inside them. I know that cats' penises are barbed. I know that.

So once a male cat gets in there, it's like a spiky thing. It's hard to extract. And, of course, dogs have the knot. I know that. Oof. So once a male cat gets in there, it's like a spiky thing. It's hard to extract. And of course, dogs have the knot. You know that. Is this like talk about animal penises? Well, it's part of the- Pigs are like a corkscrew. What are you-

Yeah, they are like a corkscrew. And ducks are too. And the duck vagina is like the opposite corkscrew. Oh, really? It's an opposite corkscrew. Yeah. Well, I bring this up an opposite corkscrew. Yeah. Well, I bring this up because, I don't know, did you get an email from these guys?

They're working on a furry RPG. I think I have a business card from that guy. Yeah, and he wanted some, well, I emailed with him. I wanted some advice, and I told him, I might be a consultant on a furry tactics video game. Is it porno also? No, but I'm going to encourage them to make it porno because then it'll sell better.

They were like, what should we do to make this game good? Oh, God. I'll look it up real quick. I should promote it. Huge tits. Every girl character has to have enormous tits. Do not fuck that up like Vito has done, like Eric July has done.

I did not fuck it up. My character's tits are perfectly reasonable. I did tell them I'm like, look, it's called Live by the Fur Tactics. But there's no anything for it yet, but it's based on another game. Whatever. Point is

What game? It's based on another tactical RPG which is currently available on Steam. Live by the Sword Tactics. Now available on Steam. And actually, guys, check out Live by the Sword Tactics on Steam because all the reviews are for the previous version of the game, which people did not like, but then they fixed it

and made it awesome. So check it out and give them a good review. Did you know that if you went to petto.community it goes to the biggest problem in the university? Fantastic. Wonderful. That's cool. Yeah, that's great. Did you see that? You saw all the

bootleg Petto t-shirts? Yeah, fuck that. We gotta put those up. Anytime you Okay, so there's a thing. If you ever have an idea for a t-shirt don't put it on twitter because all these sites just search for t-shirt idea or like cool t-shirt and whatever image you've posted they will just immediately upload it to all these aggregate sites as a t-shirt for instance right now remember that eric made his which part is the best shirt which is now available on every chinese website because he uploaded a super high resolution image for them to steal.

Yeah. Which part is the shirt on a shirt? It's a shirt. No, it's still the actual image. They know what they're doing. God, that's that guy. That toe head guy. He's fucked. Who's this toe head guy He's fucked

Who's this toe head guy The pronouns guy That bald guy Heels vs baby face That's his name I think he called my comic book Super groomer or something And I was like that doesn't even track

God damn that guy's like painful What was funny was he tried to get He doesn't take selfies at the gym everyday Of him wearing a Brack. God damn. That guy's like painful. What was funny was he tried to get. He doesn't take selfies at the gym every day. Of him wearing. But he never loses any weight. Rip-a-verse merchandise. And he's doing a Rip and the Silverback podcast.

They're doing a podcast, which is him and Eric July talking about how they're both stupid. And he's Silverback. He's Silverback. That was a surprise. I was like, do you really. It's like, really? If you're doing a podcast with a black guy, do you want any monkey or gorilla references in the name? Shouldn't you? Seems like an obvious thing

to avoid. It's called Monkey and Eric. Okay, well, I guess that's fine. It's called Big Dumb Ape and Eric July. Oh, good.

All right. I was misled for a second. It was funny because he was trying to shit talk my comic to that Nerd Roddick guy. And then Nerd Roddick kind of was like, well, this comic does kind of look cool. And I was like, oh, man. All right. You know what we got to find? I figured out what the end game is.

We got to find Nerd Roddick and all these guys, a younger, blacker guy that they can use as a token. Yeah. A better token. Yeah, a better token. Like a woman. One who's like smart and charismatic. Yeah, yeah.

Like a black woman that's not too hot and not too annoying, which, believe me, this is going to be like finding the fucking Philosopher's Stone, all right? But. I was going to say, a woman? I don't know. That's going to be a tall order. A woman that's not too annoying? That's going to be tough.

A woman who knows stuff about comic books? No, she doesn't have to know shit about comic books. She can just show up and go, neurotic, you so crazy? Just be in the corner of the screen. That's the end game for Eric. Then I don't need Eric July anymore. Guys, don't forget to get your super chats in now. Vote on all the problems at biggestproblem.show.

Like a guy that does a good Urkel impression. Yes. Did I do that? They'll be like, oh, this guy. You, get out of here. This guy's our guy now. I do have to say one thing To everybody watching this Please

Go to youtube.com Slash biggest problem Watch The biggest review Of the Marvels Even if you don't Want to watch it Please just put it on

In the background And run it for the full 60 minutes Okay Because it will boost it In the algorithm And it will grow this show Immensely

Oh We've already gotten Like 55 new subscribers From it But we just need people Really Just put it on In the background Watch it in the algorithm, and it will grow this show immensely. We've already gotten like 55 new subscribers from it, but we just need people. Really? Just put it on in the background. Watch it to the end. You don't even have to watch it. Just leave it running.

Or watch it, because it's actually good. Put it on like a podcast. It's basically a podcast episode where we rip on a movie that I thought was shitty and you thought was cute because you're basically a woman now. Yeah. That's fine. That's your girlfriend talking. No, she watches Lifetime movies

No Have you ever watched one of those? Not in like years I haven't had cable in like 15 years so If they're not on cable I have to pay for a special Lifetime You're paying for the Lifetime pass Through Amazon It's like three bucks a month

Did you ever see that thing and it was like all the Lifetime movie posters That are just a man and a woman wearing holiday sweaters with like a tree behind them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a hundred. Yeah, they're funny. They are funny. Because women don't, like they're writing, they write for, it's women writing for women. Right.

So it's like a copy of a copy, right? And they don't understand, like, they don't value specificity in certain things. Sure. So the problem will always resolve around, like, well, my husband's at his business proposal. He's going to make partner. Like, that's, like, a big thing. That's very important.

Like, he's going to make partner. And it's like, well, is he a lawyer? It's like, he's making partner. He's making partner at the firm. At the firm. The firm where he works. Yeah. That's just classic storytelling right there.

He's got his expense account. Please watch The Biggest Problem in the Marbles now on our YouTube channel. Also watch that great clip of the Isom fan who admits that he hasn't read Isom, which is fucking hilarious. Oh, yeah. That was great. All right, guys. Antagonist for 10. Hey, Vito, post pictures of your cats in my pet owner Discord server I worked so hard to get you into.

There is a pet-o Discord server. Are you aware of this? No. Yeah, well, join that. You can post pictures of your dog. Hello, Dick. Hello, Maddie. And also, Crimson, get a job and stop stealing my hard-earned tax dollars.

Yeah, come on, Crimson. Get a job, man. Kaiju Turtle for 7 Canadian. My uncle died this morning at 2 a.m., age 59. I am choosing to memorialize him here. Have a drink for Donnie tonight. Thank you for not killing yourselves. Thank you, Kaiju Turtle.

For $6.99? Your uncle was a... Yeah, you should really pay tribute. Come on. He's a fucking $20 man. $100 is like a $10 man. He's a proper tribute. Yeah.

Aren't you going to get some money from the estate? Come on. If my nephews donated $7 to memorialize me, I'd be pissed. Well, you'd be dead, so it doesn't really matter. I'd be pissed still. Yeah, behind the grave. Like, I saw Knox going to rise up and cause some trouble. Red for five. Shout out to Tony!

TGD from the Geek Getaway. All hail the Frog King you see is all. Tony's killing it right now. He's got his own. We've spun off an entire network of Rip-A-Verse hangers-on. That guy had Eric July's neighbor on. Yeah, which is hilarious.

It was like a sword collector and like a business analyst. Yeah. And he spent thousands of dollars supporting Eric. And now he just does not like him anymore or something? Or he thinks he's crazy? Well, he wrote this giant article about all the ways Eric's business is failing. Badly run. Yeah.

The audience is shrinking. The total take is dying. And he's just stuck with dead inventory and he's and way too many employees yeah his overhead's insane it's all the same stuff i said like that eric wrote a big cry fest on that he wasn't going to pay attention to me anymore because i was right or the shit i said which is you can't overprint your comic you're going to destroy the secondary market, which obviously happened. Yeah. So. That's what drives me nuts.

It's like everyone just goes, they're just like haters. I'm like, yeah, but we've also been just like very right about most of the shit we've said, if not all of it. Yeah. I'm like, if you overprint the book, collectors are not going to, you're going to lose all those speculators and collectors because they know they're going lose money by buying your comic no i'm a hater though i just hate him sure for calling me the n-word well that was very bad of him and he said that uh he said that it looks like from an outsider's perspective that in order to like be a fan of the rip averse now you have to like take sides against other people and that's bad like you don't want customers going like oh well if i buy this i have to be against like these guys right we're making

fun of everybody like i don't want to do that right you should have just ignored those guys and let them make fun of your comic once this wasn't supposed to happen it was honestly when it had started happening i'm like man I probably shouldn't be picking this fight. I'll just say one thing, and then we'll move on. I shouldn't be fighting, but then he went crazy. He had a crazy relationship with Ethan VanSyver

and all these people, just so you could get off calling out Eric July. Well, and then it turned around, and now Ethan VanSyver, for some reason, turned against Eric July. It's been nuts. Koof for two. Thank you all for not killing yourselves. Thank you, Koof, but you didn't get in the first Super Chat.

What's going on, man? You're slipping. Red for two. R.I.P. car. Don't laugh at that. Dick Wood for two with a bunny avatar. Pop quiz for two. I wish Vito would pull up.

Hey, would you blow me for two? Vito stopped to get his $10 fish fillet. They're not $10. Pop quiz for two says this episode better be ad-free. There will be no ads on the podcast episodes because Not till we get big. If we get big, but also we have trouble

monetizing them because you'll play the shaft theme or something stupid like that and then we can't monetize it. I mean, or we can monetize it, but then we gotta give half to whoever owns the Shaft theme, so it's not worth it. It's Eric's great-great-great-great-great-grandfather. Yeah.

Shaft knocks. Goldilocks for five. Both of my parents are dying from cancer, and even they show up on time. Also, Crim, get a job. Pablo Rambo for ten. Fido, we went to the world-famous number two. It's a B-fair.

GG. I get it. Okay. Red for two. It's a B-fair. GG. I get it. Okay. Red for two. Leighton Gay hops. Bunnies. Turtles. I forgot you were late.

Shut up. James Gardner for 20. I did. Dear Vito, please grab me a fish filet, some liquor, and a fancy copy of I Suck Off Men. Not to be confused with Which Was Which. The fish filet is good. We've discussed this. It's a great sandwich.

It is good. Man, I just want to see that porno, man. The ice on porno? I suck off men. All right. Make it happen. Failure is not what we do. Talk to Adam 22, whose birthday I need to RSVP to.

You didn't already? No. That was dumb. You should RSVP right away. Yeah. All right, I'll RSVP. Fucking porn star? The hottest porn star on the internet?

Well, I was going to, because I didn't know if I was going to have a plus one, but I can't think of anybody to bring. Oh, yeah. Should I bring Josh Denny? Yeah, that's what that place needs. I'll talk to Eric Escobar. He's a good guy. Oh, let's see.

I'll bring Josh Denny. Well, he's got, I mean, will his girlfriend let him go? Yeah, does his girlfriend want him to go to a porn star's birthday? Let's see. Actually, she'd probably like, yeah, take him anywhere. I invited my friend Dirk. He's going to get back to me. Hold the truth hostage for five.

I am a real bunny-merican. Hop for what's right. Hop for what's right. When I some knocks, grandson Eric July grifts outside. Hop for what's right. Was I supposed to sing that to the tune of something? Sounds like lyrics. Clay Early for five.

Happy birthday, Justin. This could have been a beer for you, but it's a super chat and said, happy birthday, Justin. Clap Trap the Destroyer for five. Is that why it could have been a beer for him? We should stop reading birthday wishes unless they're 20 bucks. No, I'm just fucking with you. Clap Trap five.

On time as always boys Fuck you There's traffic The gentleman's sausage for 5 Reignite the beef Get revenge Tear into that Frasier reboot Like it makes Isom look like Citizen Kane We should

Yeah We should Review it I guess Slow that sucker up I just don't want to watch it It sounds like it's terrible Tommy Salami for 2 Come on you want to watch Frasier?

Says Sour Patch Yeah but it's a bad Frasier If Niles is Niles was the show Yeah but it's terrible. Tommy Salami for two. Come on, you don't watch Frasier? Says Sour Patch. Yeah, but it's a bad Frasier. If Niles was the show. Yeah, but it's still Frasier. Frasier. He was good in the Marvels. Yeah. I do like Kelsey Grammer.

Tommy Salami for two says Sour Patch kids are healthy. They have vitamin C. Let me check that. How much vitamin C? How much is enough for you? I don't see any of that. Not a significant source of fat, trans fat, cholesterol, vitamin D, calcium. Yeah, I have no idea.

Sure, they're great. They're great for you. 0% fat. John Riffs for 10. Crowder put his logo on that manifesto. Oh, God. I've seen people call it. Well, I mean, he broke the story.

That's something I would do. The story. Oh, wow mean, he broke the story. That's something I would do. The story. Oh, wow. Somebody sent him a thing. Kill all these F-slurs. Oh, my God. Well, that's the other thing. The manifesto is not nearly as sensational as I thought it would be,

but everybody's treating it like it is. Like, she said she wanted to kill crackers. I'm like, wasn't she a white lady? Who cares? I thought it would be like a trans rights statement. Like, hey, we gotta take back America for the trans people. That would have been more interesting.

I think people just kind of don't understand mass shooters. Yeah. They're nuts. Did that main guy live a manifesto? Mr. Main? The guy that shot that blew his head off in that dumpster? Yeah I don't know, I don't think so

I think he just hated bowling It really annoyed me that These guys were all saying, like Crowder and all these guys were saying Well this is what they want The trans movement, this is what they want I was like, well What about all the violent video game stuff? Like I thought none of that I thought it was just the shooter who's crazy right so now it's like the whole isn't it a mental health problem yeah well that's why they're gonna say it though because

they're gonna say she was mentally ill because she was trans that's how they're gonna spin it well there's a lot of mentally ill people that don't have the balls to go and also most mass shooters are not trans people so So, you got it. Maybe they are. It's the mass shooter lotto, man. We've talked about the mass shooter lotto. Yeah, it's just so dumb. They get all excited when you get a trans guy because it's like, oh, man, this is a whole new thing.

We finally got those bastards. Finally, we got one. Right where we want them. David Gomez. Oh, so he put his logo on the manifesto. I've seen people call him a hero. Like, he broke into the police station to steal it for fuck's sake. Yeah, he got an email.

They're also worried he'll be Epstein'd. That's ridiculous. Can't believe people like that guy. Yeah, they're worried that Crowder will be at a bathhouse and he'll suck off so many guys it'll drown. Yeah, it'll drown and cum. Now that he's divorced. Right.

Wait, is he actually getting divorced? Oh, yeah. That was a divorce. Well, he should stop yelling at his wife. David Gomez for two. In a while, throwing up emoji. Steve for two. The best episode in a while. Hashtag ban Lofty his wife. David Gomez for two. In a while, throwing up emoji. Steve for two. The best episode in a while.

Hashtag ban Lofty Pixels. Ban Lofty. If you haven't blocked Lofty yet, go find Lofty Pixels on Twitter and block her or him or whatever. Lofty's, look, he's got his problems, but don't block him. Just Ebon for five. Speaking of the Old West, Vito, please tell Sergio Leone that The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly is a shit movie because it doesn't have character arcs. That's different. Ghostbusters doesn't have a character arc either.

Ghostbusters definitely has a character arc. Venkman softens. No. Venkman goes from a womanizing whatever the hell to like, you know, he's a little softer to attract that lady, I think. But nothing happened. You know what? Maybe she just kind of learned. Maybe she has, you know what?

She has the character arc because she goes from I'm a stuck up bitch who could not possibly fall for this Venkman character. Okay. Okay. You know what? There's a certain charm about him. Okay. Boom. Character arc.

Yeah, but none of the Ghostbusters do. They don't need to. Not even Winston. The black one learns the value of a hard day's work, maybe. He's the only one who knew. Lady, if there's a steady paycheck in it, I'll do anything. I'll do whatever you want. Alright. Look.

Some movies don't need a character arc, but a superhero movie involving a teenage girl who is becoming a superhero for basically the first time probably should have one. It would have made it better, but if the bad guy had been bad and whatever she was doing had been clear, I think it would have been okay to not have any character arcs. Something needs to change. There could have been one character arc. Yeah.

Just the little girl, who did kind of have one, because their Indian mom said, oh, precious, we thought it's totally fine. I don't know why you gotta do the voice. We still love you. I like that the review I posted on my channel, and it starts off with you going,

oh, and I'm like, okay, well, I guess that's how we like that the review I posted on my channel and it starts off with you going, Oh, he jumped up and he got you. And I'm like, okay, well, I guess that's how we're starting the review. She had a character arc. The mom or the kid? The kid. Not really. Yeah, kind of. A little bit.

Not really. Mempod for 10 Canadian. I was listening to your guys in the car and my mom was laughing along at the show. A few days later, I found it listening to it on her own, dying laughing at your grandpa. I had some impression. On her own? Wow.

You got to kick her door in. Mom, what are you listening to in there? Are you listening to The Biggest Problem? I don't know why any women listen to this show. Does dad know about this? I don't know why. You know what's weird? You know that's blackface that you're laughing at, mom.

You make all these fat women jokes, and then I swear to God, I get messages from fat ladies. They go, that is so funny. Fat women hate fat women too. Yeah, I guess. You know? They hate the other fat women. Pop quiz for five. Regulation veto. Oversized veto. They're just temporarily fat. They could lose it. Yeah, they could lose at any point. Temporarily

embarrassed fat people. Always with the checks and balances. Spider Eternal for five. Dick is saying that government regulations caused a man to desperately add protein goo to his regular milk or go destitute. Yeah. Vito doesn't get it. Lol.

Okay. Dumb. Fine. JJ for five. Vito, you ambushed me with a story that I posted at you as an own. I wouldn't look dumb if I'd looked up the story I posted to make you look dumb. It was a tweet. I shit out a tweet.

I don't know whether we're going to actually discuss it. Pigeon Saw for 10. I love the liberal idea that regulations are to protect people from big, bad companies and not for corporatocracies to strangle out competition. Corporatocracies. Great. Coup for 10. Raw milk is safe to drink.

Okay. And stays for a long time, even without refrigeration. But the government forces producers to pasteurize them, reducing its shelf life, increasing food poisoning. Go USDA slash FDA. I have heard more stories about people buying raw milk and getting horribly poisoned. I have no problem with pasteurization. When have you heard that?

Because you can sell raw milk in America. You can do that. You just have to do it according to some guidelines as part of a co-op or some shit. Bullshit then. And then you have to go transport it a long way or something? All I. And then you have to go, like, transport it a long way or something? All I know is that you have to, like, get it from the farm directly,

and people will do that, and then they get horribly sick and die. They do? I think so. When do they get horribly sick and die, though? I'm not prepared for the raw milk question, okay? Well, let's see. Look up raw milk injuries. Injuries.

I don't know if injuries is the right term. Okay, bullshit. The first one. Oh, why? Because it's a public health database. Go find a story. Hit the news tab. No, no, no.

Just hit the news tab. Shut up. Not statistics? No, because there will be news stories. Okay, outbreak studies from raw milk. All right. What's the deal? What's the deal? What's the deal?

Go to that outbreak studies thing. Is raw milk safe to drink? See, you can get raw milk, so I don't know what fucking regulations you're talking about. Consumers can now buy raw, unpasteurized milk in North Dakota. Can now? So they just made it legal to do that. Well, this year.

So you've been fucking gaslighting us and thinking you can do it's okay look at this do it forever look at this dove song dairy brand goat milk possible contamination possible but this is like half a year ago and this one is an arson factory that was a great man and i don't know why we're tossing out his what was his early life if i go to wikipedia louis pastor. I think he was French. Oh. One of those French Jews, you think?

What are you being Jews? Louis Pasteur. Famous. Let's see. Was a French chemist and a microbiologist. We'll have all of our questions answered. Born to a Catholic family of a poor tanner. Who's still bad.

There you go. They were all Catholics. Come on. All right. Okay. That checks out. Why did you control F for Jew? You can see that?

Yes, I did see that. Control F, Jew. Zero to zero. Shit. All right, whatever. So why don't we have raw milk all the time? Control F Because you have that mouse Shit Alright whatever So why don't we have raw milk all the time You know what leave a voicemail we'll get into raw milk later Somebody who knows about raw milk let us know

Let Vito know Don't let me know I don't want to read I love my pasteurized milk it's delicious Maxwell 21 for $17 Vito it's your boy Prime Bruh you had more anti-Marvels videos this week than the quartering did. Can't wait for Vito brand coffee ads.

I find Jeremy TBF cringe, and I'm seeing red flags. That was a close one. That was a good one for $17. That was a good amount. That was a good one. Good try. Nitro5, hi Wendell. Versed for $20. Vito, have you been keeping up with the boogie fallout with Muda and his GF?

Shit's hilarious, well we talked about it a little bit I gotta watch this video, was it cantankerous? But then Boogie said that Muda's on his side And wants to help him or something And I don't know if that was a cope Um, Muda fucked it up a little bit Yeah He should have kept up the kayfabe

He should have gone harder You always gotta go You always gotta go hard But he can't go hard on Boogie Because he just goes Yeah, I guess I am The worst guy who ever lived No, you're worse than that

You're worse You're worse than that You're worse than that And when that girl gets pregnant And you want to abort her baby You look her in the eyes Yeah Let's start a campaign

Save Boogie's baby Hashtag. I think that's, well, yeah, okay. Hey, you know who's in the chat is our good friend, comic artist Pro Secrets, Ethan Van Skiver, who says Sinatra was the first fake retirement. He did a big farewell concert, did My Way, et cetera, just wanted attention. Came back two years later singing a new song, Can't We Try Again, which is not a classic. That's no my way.

Gay, but I still like Frank. I think it's cool. I think your problem sucks. The fake retirement thing? Yeah, because everyone gets to like, it's like a fake funeral. All right. I'm quitting the podcast. See you.

Yeah, it's cool. I kind of thought about for episode 108. That was fun. If I just blew up and I left the show, it would have been good. People, it's cool. I kind of thought about for episode 108. That was fun. If I just blew up and I left the show, it would have been good. People would have liked that. Gut for two says, Wait, is Cyberfrog 3 out right now? Cyberfrog 3 is being worked on.

I think it's still available on on-demand on Indiegogo and wherever else it's being sold. Cyberfrog 3. Me, 4-1-2-0 for five. That mouse is not going to work on a blank white piece of paper. Just FYI. Get me a mouse pad. I was going to use the scroll wheel.

The scroll wheel will work. No, I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it.

You don't want to use the fucking Super Hornet? I got this from the Super Hornet guys. I thought you were giving me the laptop for some reason. That would be suicidal. It would be. It doesn't work. Look. It doesn't do anything.

You're messing it up. See? Now it works. It's broken. Where is it? Up there. I think it's dead. You got to plug it in.

That one's dead. It works fine. Well, it doesn't fucking work for me. It doesn't even have a laser coming out of it. You can't see lasers. You can't see lasers. Let me see it. I bought a mouse, and Dick is like negging me about it.

It was off. Look. So it only worked because you were moving that one along with it. That's so stupid. Dick was moving both mice to fuck with me. I'm pretty sure it works. Okay, well I think you gotta charge it or put some batteries in it or something. Yeah, alright. Did you do that by accident? You were moving both mice and you're like, see it works. No.

You're an idiot. Stupid. I did it on purpose. Alright, me for five says wait a sec. But it was working because you were moving both mice and you're like see it works. No, you're an idiot Stupid I did on purpose. All right me for five says wait it was working because you were fucking with it It doesn't work. It has never worked No, it worked while you were fiddling with your paper. Look at this brand new. I don't have to plug Oh, I don't want to have to look at how much nicer is than that one If I was a little drunker, I would have smashed that mouse. I would have thrown it so hard at the wall. It would have smashed. It would have been awesome. I'm sorry I bought a mouse to try and make the show work better. I'm such a terrible co-host. I already fucking had

one. That one sucks. It doesn't work. I bought a nice one. And then you got mad at me for buying a nice one. You said, just use the one I have. Because we already fucking have so many mice. There's already like a car mouse. Then get one that works. The car mouse is right here and the car mouse also doesn't work.

Is this plugged in? Maybe. Can you read the thing? Can I have a regular mouse and not one that looks like a car for no reason? I can't read the thing because I need to scroll up. Okay. Now that one works. Great.

No, go down. See, you're fucking it up. The Marvels end up on a planet Of people who can only communicate Through song and dance It was so bad Theater kids Vote it up

Yeah That was so That was Singing dancing planet Man that was the worst thing I've ever seen I did like Captain Marvel's dance A little bit

Well and it sucked Because like If you're at like a singing And dancing planet You think like Oh yeah okay We're here Like everything's hopping

and popping all the time. But in fact, they're singing slow and stupid. Yeah, like Newsies. Like, hey, hey, everybody. You know what?

That's a good point. It really should have been more, welcome to the planet where everybody has some fun and there's my brother and he's got a gun.

Yeah, that would have been great. It needed to be more jazzy. But it wasn't. As you said, the black lady didn't rap, which was a very obvious

missed opportunity. They should have cut to her and said, and now for didn't rap, which was a very obvious missed opportunity. They should have cut to her and said, and now for a rap! And then they just cut to her. They can't understand you! They can't understand what you're saying! You gotta sing it! You gotta sing it! The joke would have been, and now for a rap. And they cut to her and she goes, why do I gotta rap? And they go, well... No, that's not a good joke.

That's a good joke. That's racist. It's not racist. No, it's anti-racist. It's funny. Stop fucking with the car mouse. What? Great guy Gabe for $2.79 says, Keep your chins up, Vito. Meet up in Toronto.

I'd go to Canada. Lloyd Lillooin's here for $8. Aha! I knew it! I fucking knew that it worked. Look, that's mouse one. Mouse two. Okay, give me mouse one.

Okay, let's see if it continues working. Nope, it's broken. You fucking broke it! How? Because you put it down so hard! Why would that break a mouse? You put it down so hard on the table Go, go Move it. You're fucked, man Yo, that mouse is fucked It works fucking fine

It probably has to be within eyesight of the fucking Bluetooth or whatever What? Eyesight? Not eyesight, but it needs to be right next to the fucking thing to pick it up. Because I'm thinking eyesight. What the hell are you talking about? It needs to be in the general range.

Oh, you're right. Okay. So we need this one, which is new and probably has better range than that one. Alright, just read the... Oh, I was right the whole time. Great. I'm glad to know that.

Well, I was right. It works. No, but if it doesn't work, because if it worked, it works in certain situations, that doesn't mean it works. If a gun fires one out of ten times, would you say the gun... You could easily reach over that far and use it from there. Oh, okay. Well, your fucking feet are that far under the table.

Let me do it. I'm going over here to use the mouse. What a great show. Lloyd Lillooin for eight says, AlphaCore is just a ripoff of Zod and his Kryptonians, but in green armor. Low effort Eric strikes again.

Dean Chalk for 10. If the copyright lawsuit is any indicator, branding like writing is not one of Eric's strengths. Or maybe he believes he can rebrand the cross. Yeah, how are you going to sell Epsom merchandise if his logo is a cross? You want to sell the t-shirt with the emblem on it. That's how DC makes 90% of their money. You don't want cross underpants?

No. Honestly, if you look at DC and Marvel Comics, all their money is selling an X-Men logo. Lightning bolt, Superman. He's literally fucking up the branding. That's 1,000% of their money is that. What an idiot. I want a Green Lantern shirt. I want a Superman shirt.

And he didn't give any of them emblems of any sort. Not even like I saw them on himself. Why do you think Superkiller has that big stupid circle? It's so I can sell t-shirts and shit. Good luck. You gotta do something. I'd sold a t-shirt to Riley. He wears a Superkiller shirt.

Yeah, the branding is terrible. Mark's made... Oh, what an idiot. Yeah, you're right. He has no logo. There's no iconic logo to sell. He has to put the Isom logo. That's the logo.

I can't even put an I. logo to sell. He has to put the ISOM logo. That's the logo. It's like wearing a shirt that just says Wolverine across it instead of like a cool Wolverine graphic. No, the head. The head thing. Yeah, exactly. You just have his face. Something iconic. Oh my god. What a fucking idiot. Is it cool to own a shirt

that says Spider-Man instead of like a picture of his cool head and his webbing? Yeah. The spider emblem or whatever else. That's real cool. Marks Maine for 20. Biggest problem, Connecticut drivers. Massachusetts naming all their streets.

Maple Street, Pennsylvania extorting tolls for I-76. The money doesn't even go to the roads. Alpha Corps big guy has that Bucol fat removal. Oh, yeah, he does. Connecticut drivers, huh? He does. Oklovich for 10. That woman in the Marvels collects in hot sauce.

Oh, we were trying to figure that out. Because the capeshit target audience think nerd hobbies and the consumption of products in intellectual properties constitutes a substantial identity. Yeah, she collects things. Jim Satala for 20 big dollars. I can't believe neither of you mentioned how the lightning dude who burst out of the motel in the Ice Sum trailer was completely ripped off of Avatar the Airbender character, Boomy the Earth King Duotie.

That's because you assume I have watched all of Avatar the Airbender. I don't know what that is. Yeah. Well, I missed that reference. Let me see. Don't press your mouse. Okay. Boomy?

Boomy. Avatar. Avatar. The air queer? Bender. You don't know Air air queer? Bender. You don't know airbender? All right. Oh, shit.

Wow. It is pretty similar. Look at that. It also looks like a guy named Colonel Stinkmeaner. Yeah, all right. Isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, all right.

I hear. Yeah, with the hair. I can see it. Yeah. Yeah, all right. I hear. Yeah, with the hair. I can see it. Yeah. Cool. Very cool. Clock. Did you see the designs for the Boondocks revival that didn't get made?

I'm so sad. They looked awesome. But Aaron McGruder wasn't on it, though, was he? He must have been in some way. It's his property. I don't know. But they made him look like fucking Capcom characters. It was awesome. Bendy Banana

for five wants more dictations. Okay. Verico for seven Canadian says your Uzumaki hat is fire, Vito. Who's your favorite Naruto villain? What's the one? I mean, the first guy they fight is pretty cool with the big sword. The shark teeth

guy. Why? Because he had a big old sword. He traps him in a water bubble. Oh, that's why he's your favorite. I'd have to think about it. I bought this hat because it was on sale, not because I'm a huge diehard Naruto guy. But I like Naruto.

I like the heroes more than the villains, though. Garo was cool, but he becomes a hero. That's the other problem. That girl with the pink hair. All right, well, my mouse is broken again. So, Dablin' Man for 10. I am just a- How did it with the pink hair. All right, well, my mouse is broken again, so. Dabbling man for 10. I am just able to- How did it-

All I did was touch it, and it fucking worked. Dude, it goes in and out. I fucking told you that it paused, okay? You weren't ready for this. You weren't ready to do the mouse, because you cry too much when shit goes wrong. I'm going to put the mouse- It's not going to work. In my area.

It's not going to work. You didn't tell me that when we- Now you're inventing, like, a new history. Did you ever inform me that the mouse doesn't work in my general area? It's not going to work. You didn't tell me that. Now you're inventing a new history. Did you ever inform me that the mouse doesn't work in my general area? It's working right now. See? Okay, why is it going to stop working? I don't know. Dablinman for 10 says, I am just a worthless

liar. I am just an imbecile. I will only complicate you. Trucks and me and fall as well. Okay. David Gomez for 5, I like how the Isom fan on the Low Value Mail show was the lowest IQ wigger you could have ever found. I was really surprised. He wasn't a wigger.

He was a black guy. I was really surprised that he was like, well, what'd you like about the plot? And he went, well, I didn't read it. And I was like, there's no way. I can't believe it. These guys are, they believe in the parallel economy and they just full on believe it.

But how do they not understand that the parallel economy falls apart the second you need a mass market audience to go, oh, I don't want to sit through this show because it's boring. Like when you sit someone down from the Ice Home cartoon, you go, yeah, are you going to watch it all this before Eric July? And they're like, no, I watched the first episode. I didn't find it interesting. Yeah.

And then you don't have a budget to make any more of it. And your parallel economy falls apart. Yeah. On the John asks, how long did it take for you to pay Mr. Girl? You know, you gotta ask me if you think I owe you money, alright? Jaguar or Jagar for two. Thoughts on Heels

vs. Babyface fanboying over Eric July? It's tremendously embarrassing. Yeah. And again, if you're that big of an eyes on fanboy, why you with a giant YouTube channel have not put out any sort of review about how it's your favorite comic or something like that? Because they've

decided that it doesn't have to be good. You just have to support it. Right. And I think that guy just has like a, I think he just has a hate boner for Ethan VanCyver. And he also has a hate boner for me and for you, so. Me?! Well, you do a podcast with me and he hates me. What did I do?! you do a podcast with me, and he hates me.

What did I do? You made a podcast with me. So he hates me? I assume he does. I mean, you're also ripping on him on Twitter at this point, so he must hate you. That's fine. That's no reason to hate someone. That's a good reason to hate someone.

He just looks like a toe. How is that my fault? And he pretends to work out. And he hates pronouns. He takes gym selfies. Did I miss one? Can you scroll down because my mouse doesn't work? You're done with the mouse, man.

It's too much. You bought a shitty mouse. Why is this my fault? Okay, get your mouse. Where is it? It's in this bag. Let's go. Well, I don't know if it needs batteries or something

Let's go come on here I got a battery Oh it's already got batteries in there Okay it's already got batteries Let's go Come on let's go Fork it over Give me your fucking connector I don't know how you connect it

Of course you don't Right there exactly where I thought it would be The connector fucking amazing I thought it would be in the box Wrong here Okay Right there. Exactly where I thought it would be. The connector. Fucking amazing. I thought it would be in the box. Wrong. Here. Okay.

My brand new Logitech M510. Which I'm sure will work swimmingly. It was working for us. Hey, look at that. There you go. That feels pretty good. I go up. Are you happy now? I am happy now.

I don't know why it took us 20 minutes to just plug in the mouse that works. You don't have anything to say, do you? Because it's working great. Look at this. This is incredible. Why didn't we just do this to begin with? This is awesome. I can scroll and shit.

Well, all right. Now we have a show. Dave Gomez for five. Yeah, we already did that. All right, now what Now we have a show. David Gomez for five. Yeah, we already did that. All right, now what's wrong? Okay, on the John for five. We did that. And just Ebon.

Oh, this is real smooth now. All right, I'm going to grab this thing. I think the scroll wheel gets screwed up. Just Ebon for five. The biggest problem in the universe is Vito using a problem to advertise a job. There's no job available for anyone. Nine of mine for two. Good thing Riley is funny because his pee-pee is...

Shrimp. Oh, shrimp. I thought that was Pac-Man eating a brick. Is that what Riley's dick looks like? Pac-Man eating a dick? Pac-Man eating a dick. Clamp Trap to Destroyer for ten. Wow, that'd be cool.

All the extra gravy. That's how I take my hydrocodone. I shove it into the tip of my cock. Shove it into the tip of your penis. That's the real. Boofing is like so, you know. Yeah, I hear you. Teens.

Claptrap for 10. Think about all the extra gravy you can have on Thanksgiving if you lose 13 pounds before then, Vito. Yeah, but when's the weigh-in? You gotta look it up. I mean, the countdown's on the site. Koo for two. Now I have to use my phone.

Says, happy Thanksgiving, Vito. Thank you for not killing yourself. Tool chest for five. What's a bigger scam? Boogie sad sack fund or Vito's weight loss goals? Shut up. Wolfer for $9.99. 25 days, so you have to go through Thanksgiving.

Yeah. Unless I lose it before Thanksgiving, and then I can cheat. It's like December 5th. That's your... December 5th? You can pig out on Thanksgiving, but you have to throw up. Yeah, I could it before Thanksgiving. It's like December 5th. That's your December 5th. You can pig out on Thanksgiving, but you have to throw up. Yeah, I could have one day. I probably will throw up if I do a zip.

You have to throw it up. Wolfer for 10. Good show, guys. TinyVin for 5. Someone gave Vito a daily plan to lose the remaining wheat last week, and he said he would do it on the last day. There's no hope for Vito. Guys, I've lost 17 pounds, okay? I'm not a complete fucking failure. We're on the last day. There's no hope for Vito. Guys, I've lost 17 pounds, okay? I'm not a

complete fucking failure. We're on the way. And remember that if you donate to me at youtube.com slash Vito during my Wednesday workout streams. That's bullshit. People shouldn't give you money for that. It's for other stuff. It's not just for that. They give it to me because I'm so

entertaining. I've been playing Resident Evil. It's a lot of fun Butts Grenoir For a good amount of money No wait, that's 1337 is not the other number Butts Grenoir I saw 1337

And I thought it was What's the bad number? You tell me I don't remember What would it be? You had to pick a number. 14 something else. 14 perhaps followed by two loopy boys.

But that's not it. It's 1337, which is late. I found this podcast a few months ago, and it's my favorite. The only negative thing is the deep sadness I feel when thinking about that bike that Vito let rust away. Missed opportunities voted up. Okay. Well, I'll get another bike. And then a Vietnamese family took it.

Did they? I gave away all my Burning Man bikes in the front, and one family took it, and I was kind of annoyed. I was like, well. They're obviously going to flip them. Yeah. So what do you care? They're all rusted out and shit anyway. I feel like they think they're getting something over on me.

Because they're taking all the bikes. They're probably going to scrap them. Joe Ray for 10. Vito, is there a dollar amount that would make losing the 13 pounds palatable? What about like $50,000? $10,000. Yeah, okay. That's what I thought. Cara Fro for two.

Great show, Vito and Dick. Well, $10,000 I could buy a complete collector's edition of Magic the Gathering. Featuring a gold-bordered black lotus card, which I can... I would invest it. Koo for two. I was late and gated the stream. Like this show. Absolutely.

Red for two. Castle... Fart? Fart Wind. Okay. Oklovich for two. Vito, five. Sour Patch Kids is 100 calories. Is that true? No, it's not. It's like 12. 12 kids? 12 Sour Patch Kids is 100 calories.

Wow, you knew that exactly. I read the book because I count calories. I look at the thing. I don't eat stuff that has too many calories. Drunk at Atheist Studio for five. Yeah, calories like Scrooge McDuck counts money. Yeah, exactly. And I jump into a giant pile of them and shove them in my mouth.

Drunk in Atheist Studio for five. One of these problems has shifted my imposter syndrome into hyperdrive. No, you're doing good, Drunk in Atheist Studio. He's talking about other people that are editing. He's been editing our clips. Shut up. You're doing a good job. Everybody else sucks.

Pigeon Saw, 174 for 10. Also, good show. Don't have imposter syndrome. Drunk in Atheist Studio for 2. Says, remember when the band Kiss retired in 1996? I think we brought that up. F1Fan for 5 says, I'm drunk. Here's money. I love you guys. Thanks, F1Fan.

I'm going to give the last. And that's the end of the Super Chats. And okay, that's the show. There you go. Yeah, you can put that up. I got to change that graphic. But I'm going to change it soon.

Wait, let's look at that shirt. What's your favorite part? Which shirt? Oh, the ISOM shirt? ISOM, what's your favorite part? And now there's guys uploading videos, finally, after two years, talking about what their favorite part of Ice Sum is Isn't that crazy?

John Delarose you're a traitor Stop with this Oh yeah wait what's with that? Cause John plays both sides of the fence Oh is he? He's a comic He goes I love what Eric Chilaz is doing He's just making comics

I'm like yeah alright Okay whatever You fucker Where's the shirt? What's your favorite fart shirt? This is, you're going to find, look, it's everywhere. You can buy it anywhere you want. Yeah.

It's like my favorite thing. It's only $22.79 from this site. From this pirate site? Yeah. So we got the AlphaCore guy and the Isom guy, both of which have no identifying markings that would ever be a possible branding. You literally can only get the Isom or AlphaCore logo on a shirt. The AlphaCore logo has a stylized A in the logo.

Why is that not on their uniforms? I don't know. Like, that's obvious how you do this. But why are they, like, why are they looking so tough? Because they're tough guys, man. They're the ultimate guys. Hey, we came here to tell you not to do drugs

and to ask you, what's your favorite part of not doing drugs? Yeah, I don't understand. And this is Isam. I don't understand that people are like, oh man, this is so cool that Eric did this. I'm like, so he's immortalizing a phrase that establishes that most people who bought his comic book either didn't read it or can't think of anything memorable to say about it. And that's a big win for him.

Just tell people what you like about. So what's your favorite part then? So what is it? Which part is your favorite part then? That's what I want to know. Tell me. It's crazy how many of them wrote giant diatribes explaining how to tell people. This is why I would never say and I don't have to say and why these guys are just disingenuous.

Honestly, it is a really hard question to answer because I tried to think of one positive thing to say about ISOM. And the best I can get to is like well you can follow the panels really pretty well you know who's what and who's what well not all the time though it shouldn't be hard it's not hard for anything else but their favorite

part is that it made money and they know that they know that when they think about it they don't identify with the story or the characters. They think about how much money it made and how it's going to destroy the mainstream. And they know that they can't say that. You know why? Because that means they got rooked.

That means they got tricked. That means they got swindled and hoodwinked. So they can't say it. So they start freaking out. You know why they hate us so much? Is because they went into this going this is going to piss off the libs and that's who we're going to be

fighting with. We're going to be fighting with liberals. But instead they're fighting with us and we don't care about any of that political shit. We're just like no, we don't hate it because it's a right wing thing. We just hate it because you guys are fucking stupid and it sucks. Yeah, because it sucks. I hate this for the same reason I hate the Marvels. They really now

want to be fighting with Marvel and DC fanboys. That was their dream. Was to go, yeah, all your comics are gay and our comics are cool, but instead they have to fight with us. We're just going, no, they're all like, all of them suck. The Marvel and DC stuff sucks and this sucks. It angers me more because it could have been

so big. It was a good comic. 40,000 people, $6 million. Oh, he could have had the next Spawn if it was a good comic. Exactly. Spawn, HBO. People remember it 20 years later. Oh, yeah, that was awesome.

And I don't even think the original Spawn was that good. No, it's not. The story was that it was decent. Spawn was very cool looking in this story. And Todd McFarlane wasn't like a guy who went online and called people the N-word when they disagreed with him. No, he was just a weird nerd who focused really hard on his comic book. I honestly think that Eric could have got away with this if he just had been like, okay, well, you know, oh, that's good advice. Like, that's good advice.

We already said this. All he had to do was say, well, I understand that it's not for everybody, but I'm just really passionate about comics. It's the thing that he did yesterday where we were talking about that he put up a tweet going, it's not my job to promote anybody else's comic book. Why would you say that? And it's like, you don't have to say anything. We know that you think that.

Everyone thinks that. Everyone thinks that. Why would you say it? Just say, either say nothing or say- Honey, do I look bad in this dress? I mean, I wish I wasn't having sex with you. I wish I was having sex with other women, all of them, every day. Just say, I'll do what I-

Why would you say that? All I had to say was, first, nothing, or I'll do what I can to promote creators as I get the opportunity, and I really want everyone to succeed in comics. Instead, he posted a big statement going, I don't have to help anyone. It's not my job. I don't statement going, I don't have to help anyone and it's not my job. I don't need you. I don't need anybody. He's a very

I'll say interesting individual. Guys, one more time please go watch Biggest Review of the Marvels. We've got to find a younger, hotter black guy. Good luck. One who got a degree. Well, we're going to have our own black guy. I should not talk like that.

But we will have my buddy come in. He's a cool guy. Your bro? Is he a bro? Your bro. I don't call him my bro, but he's a cool guy. Try it. If you call him your bro on the show.

Yeah. You give me 20 bucks? Yeah. All right. I'll give you all that. Well'll be like, well, my bro here knows what's... See, I'm already comfortable doing it. That feels terrible. Do it. If you call in your bro, I'll

give you 20 bucks. Hold on one second. And I'll do it on the show right when you do it. I'll pull out $20 and give it to you and say... He goes, what's going on? Oh, he just owed me some money from something. Guys, please, on our channel, biggest problem, biggest review of the Marvels. We need you to watch it.

Put it on. Watch it to the end. Leave it looping all night long. We're going to get this review into the stratosphere and get a bunch of subscribers, and the show gets bigger and better, and then we can fly in guests like Tim Pool or whatever the fuck. We need to go to one of those screenings, and then we have to break the like Tim Pool or whatever the fuck. We need to go to one of those screenings and then we have to break the contract where you can't say anything.

Okay, well we can't do that. Why? You can do whatever you want. Then you never get invited back to another screening. Fuck them. We'll do different names next time. Yeah, okay. I'm going with mustaches. It's going to be hard to get advanced screenings to anything, especially when my channel has a bunch of pictures

Of Brie Larson screaming But Why'd you do that? Why'd you go all like quartering? Because they're funny They're funny thumbnails You want to see them? I love my thumbnails now I've seen them I think they're pretty good

I've been having so much fun with AI Yeah I've been having so much fun with AI. Yeah. I've been having so much fun. These thumbnails are great. I mean, look, man. This is like, it looks like a quartering channel. I know it looks like a quartering channel.

Well, that's how. It's fucked up. Yeah, but look at the views. I got 20,000 views on that fucking video. My views were in the dumpster. Where? 20,000 on that one where she's in a flaming dumpster. Is this the kind of life you want to lead?

I'm genuinely, I find the news of the Marvels interesting. And honestly, it's not like I call, here's the difference. You could be doing better than this, doing Brie Larson hate watch videos. Well, yeah. Be living a better life. Well, as I've told people, YouTube's just kind of like a fun thing. And my real passion project is Superkiller.

Now available at Superkiller. Well, not available now, but will be. At superkiller.org. Get in soon. When's that coming out? April? Yeah. No.

January. Later? No, it'll come out tomorrow. It's coming out December. December? It comes out when it's ready, man. We're working on it. It's looking good.

I don't know. That's a long time for a comic. Look, it takes time to make stuff. What do you want me to do? Do it faster. Okay. I'm trying. I'm hiring more guys.

Whip it out. I tried to hire a guy, and then he said no. So that's another problem. Qualified applicants. Why? What do you want to pay him? No, it's not the money. He just was like, nah, I don't think I have the time. Oh.

Because he's making more money on other stuff? He thought that what I proposed didn't make sense. Well, no, he proposed an idea, and I'm like, that sounds interesting. Let's do it. And they said, I thought about it more, and honestly, I think what you're doing is already too good and too perfect that I don't want to interfere with it. And I said, well, thank you for that. That's very nice of you. Alright? So that's how

that conversation went. Guys, what a show! Thank you. Good night. Fuck this. Fuck your mouse.