The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 124

Episode Date: January 20, 2024

Derivative Dummies, Fast Food Face Grease, Home Repair, Ignoring Social Cues While Driving

We'll just bump up my gain or something there, huh? I do look a little low. There we go. All right. Wait, I think you bumped you up. Did you bump me up? I bumped you up. Okay.

You're bumped. You're bumped, bro. The chat will tell us. And fade. Fade. Hello. That was your, that's your, so you bust my balls for like two minutes about to fade and you're on your fucking phone When I get the fade right

Are you fucking serious You know why I'm on my phone You always do this thing What do you mean I know why you're on your phone You always do this thing where you're like You can't even like try to do it You can't go like oh yeah alright everybody We're here

Successful transition We're like Caitlyn Jenner over here Shut the fuck up When we're ten seconds away from starting the show and you suddenly go, oh, hey, the audio is fucked and the audio levels are wrong. Yeah. Okay, me, who's proactive, I go, okay, well, I'll just bring up the chat of the show. Yeah.

And then they can tell us if there's something wrong. But you did it right during the transition that you were breaking my bones for due. You had five minutes to fix the fucking audio and you waited until ten seconds before showtime to announce that you think it's broken. Because I'm doing like fucking ten things at a time over here at an early time that I didn't want to do because I Saw Him 2 is getting ripped up right now, and you know I wanted to watch that. Dick is mad at me because I set the show for six o'clock not knowing. You knew what I wanted to see. I did not know. You knew I wanted to see it. You knew I wanted to see it.

You knew I wanted to see it. Dick wanted us to push the show an hour later so he could watch Ethan VanSkyver's Ice Hump 2 review. I can't compete with that. I know. He's a master. He is a master. He's very good at what he does.

He's from Jersey, so everything's like, hey, what are you making? Trashy comic books? You making dog shit over here? I understand that we're currently up against, he's probably got what, like, what are you making? Trashy comic books? You're making dog shit over here? I understand that we're currently up against. He's probably got what? Like 3,000 people watching. He's probably got 5,000.

Why are you even bringing it up? We're going to send everybody here over there. I don't even care anymore. I don't want to be around anymore. We have a time for the show. People come to rely on a certain time. We can't push it for certain other things. I'm fucking around with my audio.

I'm sure of it. How is the audio, boys? If anybody in the chat, hopefully our voices are... The problem is you get real animated. I start animated and then stay animated, and you come in just having sniffed coffee. Oh, okay. So the fact that my voice has a natural dynamism that people love and are attracted to. How do you say that word?

Dinosaur? No, it's dynamic. My voice is dynamic. Dynamism? Dynamism. Dominism. My voice is a natural dinos-house-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s So come all the way down here. But no matter where I go, there you go.

I always got my favorite comic book on me. Eason. Starring Avery Nice. I'm going to go Scotch Earth on your ass. I forgot about Scotch Earth. That was the other good Eric July shit this week. I got a lot of Eric July this week, folks. Here on the piggest problem in the universe. Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe.

The only show that ranks every problem in the universe. From saying would to Coach Red Pill thought he could. Ha! Escape from Ukraine. No, he could not. He could not. He choked on him. That one was by me.

I'm your host, Dick Masterson. Joining me as always is Vito Giswaldi. Hi, Dick. I'm just really excited to be here. Yeah. I can't wait to do it. Nailed that transition. I can't wait to do a show with you.

Me one, Vito zero. Start out. Let's start out keeping... Oh, we're keeping score? Yeah. We need more leaderboards on the show that already has a leaderboard. How about that Chickening Out by Eric July? Wow.

Whew, bitching out big time. Wow. Chicken, chicken, chicken. I was all excited. I was like, wow, this Alex Stein and Alex Stein's producer who I've talked to because I've been on the Alex Stein show. I actually DM'd a little with him afterwards. Afterwards? After this incident.

He told Alex Stein's mom on him. He told the Blaze management. Yeah, he told. Yeah, he told the Blaze management. Eric July went to the Blaze and he said, I feel like Alex and his producer are bullying me. Oh. He made him take the fall for him and then made Alex not retaliate because Alex doesn't want to lose his job. And then he called Alex Stein a clown show and a minstrel show.

Yeah, he said, I don't want to go on that minstrel show. I think he meant minstrel show. I feel bad. Well, I don't know if I should feel bad for Alex Stein. I mean, he's trapped. He's trapped. Trapped by money. Send her a big, big yoke of money. They slapped on him.

Can't make fun of Eric July, even though he's the fucking lamest dickbrain loser there is. Lame piece of shit. Everybody wants to be friends with him still. Like the audience doesn't know. Everybody coming out of the woodwork to need to defend Eric at every turn.

It's like, why don't you let the grown man fight his own fucking battles? We think his comic sucks. He goes, it's actually industry standard to trace over 3D assets. That's very exciting and dynamic for people. And yeah, I saw George Alexopoulos giving people a lecture on it. What a disappointment that guy turned out to be. I got a comic to sell. Better sew my lips like human centipede style onto Eric July's asshole.

God damn. Yeah, I mean, I guess I'm not in this like... I'm the only honest conservative as it turns out. I was going to say, for me, I guess I'm not in this, like... I'm the only honest conservative, as it turns out. I was going to say, it kind of sucks. Like, for me, I can just say, well, all these guys are liars and snakes and assholes. So it's not a disappointment to me when they lie and cheat and suck on Eric July's taint. To you... Big disappointment.

Yeah, it's an actual disappointment where you're like, oh, I kind of liked that guy. But it turns out everybody on your side is just like, well, maybe I can get some of those dumpster dollars falling out of the rip-a-verse. Desperate. Call it desperation. Desperate for money. Why? That's why Maddox never put ads on his website. He didn't want to become that. He didn't want to become beholden to the money

these guys are. These guys, they're already making money. But it is just a club. It's a club. You got to be part of the club. Yeah. It's like you said. You're like, Vito, why do you pick fights with everybody? I'm like, because I hate all these people.

I don't want to be in their fucking club. Wow. They drive me nuts. I mean, you. And I mean, I wouldn't be let into the club for the same reason. Pedo stuff. Yeah. It's not pedo stuff.

All right? They didn't let me. Whatever. It's a whole thing. All right. Let's do pedo stuff. Fuck you. Live service video games. I win. I brought in a problem to rile up the

gamers. I thought about that all week, that game. Oh, the Suicide Squad? Yeah, and how pissed off I was. Some people were giving me shit. I don't know if I'm stepping on any comments you brought in, but they're like, well, Vito, you're the problem because you said you're still going to play it. I'm going to play it when it's

in the bargain bin. I'm not going to run out and buy it. No, why? Why play it? Because I want the story from I like the Arkham stuff, and apparently the story is good. Man, can't you just not play it? It's going to be like $10. I just wait.

It's the same with Spider-Man. I'm finally playing Spider-Man I waited for it to be 20 bucks and it sucks. I fucking hate it. I don't even know why I'm playing. Stop playing this shit Stop Did you set the gay couple to prom? No That's in the new one that I gotta wait

I'm not paying 60 bucks for that one Oh, you're playing another game that sucks? I'm playing the previous Spider-Man that sucks. Oh, wow, buddy. There's all these sequences where you're like, man, I can't wait to swing around as Spider-Man. They're like, well, how would you like to be Mary Jane sneaking around a warehouse?

Playing with my tits? Yeah. Yeah, cool. I got to run around and I got to be sneaky Mary Jane. It sucks. Okay. My thing is all messed up here. I don't know what's going on.

Am I peaking at all? Do I sound okay? I don't know, man. This thing is fucked. I'm just going to close it. I don't want to look at the chat. Oh, I have glasses on. Somebody wants to take those off.

All right. There you go. Where were you looking this whole time? That wasn't on the screen. Where were you on that one, buddy? Why don't we get a second monitor? One that just- What's we?

What do you mean we? We. The show. What do you want to do? Deck the place out with fucking monitors so you can obsessively watch them? I'm not going to obsessively watch them. You have one right back here. Why don't you have this one just show the show so we don't accidentally do 30 minutes of the show with

fucking stupid glasses. A glasses joke from two episodes ago. Who gives a fuck? Everyone's watching the Isom 2 review anyway. You're right. No one gives a shit. Let's not even do this. Show's cancelled! Cause Dick wants to go watch the fucking Isom review. Alright, just shut up. Now I gotta see it

rerun like everybody else. Oh, whatever. Live service video games, okay. Wood came in second, didn't get very many votes. Too many Asians at Costco. That was a great problem and that should be way higher. Outrageous. It was funny but it was a terrible problem. I don't know why

people didn't understand it. They're like, I don't get it. What's the problem? The problem is you can't go to Costco. I made that very clear. You can't get in there. Well, but on the other hand, who would you rather have there? If I'm gonna pick, this place is crammed with, survey says, 100 out of 100 people surveyed said they'd rather have.

Who would you rather have in the Costco? How do you still not have the Family Feud music queued up? Because that is just gold. I do, actually. Do you now? Yeah. All right. Top five answers on the board.

Who would you rather see in the Costco? Asians, number one answer. Bang. I need a ding sound. Yeah, you need the dings. And bang. That's a good bit. I like that bit.

Abandoning American citizens abroad was dead last. Was dead last in the negatives. Everyone is happy that Coach Red Pill is dead, and he probably deserves it for fucking around. Well, he definitely deserves it. He's an idiot. But, you know. The first time he got arrested, and then they go, okay. Look at this.

Why is it all slow? Look at the way it's dragging. What the fuck's going on? I don't know. Something's going on here today, man. Something's going on here. We've got a great show. Sergeant Surge says

Can we all take a second to thank Nina Infinity For this timeline Yes, thank you Nina There's a lot of timeline points Inflection points I brought up the point When you did your review All Eric had to do was go

I don't agree with the man But we're always trying to get better here at the Ripaverse. I thank him for taking interest in our project. He should have called me the F-sler. Yeah, I mean, that's... Instead of all this jibber-jabber, dance-a-roo. He said, fuck, Dick Mashins is an F. He just said it on his channel.

They wouldn't abandon me for that. They hate me at YouTube. So there's a lot of better ways to handle it. Either one or the other. The problem was that your criticism was valid, and that's what drove him insane. And he's like, I don't have to listen to anything Dick said. And then Ethan was like, well, you should listen to some of what he said, which was Ethan's way of wanting to be like, this is shit I've kind of said to you in private

or tried to bring up while massaging your ego. But Dick's just giving it to you straight and maybe you should listen to some of it. He's like, no, he's wrong. He's just, it comes from a place of anger or whatever. Fascinating. Yeah. American. Okay. Captain Cheese says Vito has a lot of race

based problems. Next bonus episode should be the bigot problem in the universe. So he can let all the hatred out. What do you think about that? Forget about our bonus episode, biggest problem in Black History Month. We did that one last year.

People were asking how long you go, but without bringing in a race problem. I don't bring in a lot of race problems. So far, zero. Hold on, hold on. You do, though. No, I don't. I don't think you could go past two episodes. I don't bring in a lot of race problems. So far, zero. Hold on. Hold on. You do, though. No, I don't. I don't think you could go past two episodes. I don't think you could get three.

I do not bring in that many race problems. I guess we'll see. There are a lot of Asians at the Costco. I had stats. Stats is the foundation of racism. Let me clue you in on something. Look. I just... I observe things, okay? I'm an observer.

You've noticed things. I've noticed things. Yeah, the noticing. The noticing is a problem. The noticing has spilled over onto liberals, and they don't know how to handle it. I'm waiting in line to get my Costco hot dog, and I go, wow, there's a lot of Asian guys getting hot dogs. Remembering the moment of your incepted racism is a huge Racial Racist rebirthing moment

Evan G says I got worried last time when I heard Vito got only three hours of sleep Because last time he did that he cried on air Yeah I saved the crying for after the show Did you really? Once I got in my car Most shows I go to my car to cry afterwards Like what am I doing?

How do I hook up with this lunatic Who bullies me for getting a working mouse And decent pens Bullies You've seen me bullying I watched Maddox stream And he said that I am being bullied And manipulated by you

And frankly I think there's a lot of truth to that Maddox said I just think he's a lot of truth to that. Maddox said, you know, Maddox is like, I just think he's falling in with a bad guy. Did he do a second Q&A? No, he didn't. Did he realize, like, it's a really stupid idea? Did he realize he's been trying to be doing live stuff for 10 years and it's not working?

Yeah. But somehow I doubt it. Gamma AKF says, Ethan VanSkyver was still so nice that he said we should at least make it to book three before we give up on Isom. That was nice of him. Well, as he said, we got to see how it wraps. How do you tie this up? That dumb bitch that they have at the Ripperverse who is their like...

No, not Carol. She's fine. Okay. Their customer relations... Cara. Cara. The one that got fired for a trans tweet she made or something. Well, I went, hey, that sucks, but you're selling video games. Do you know who's buying video games?

It's a bunch of furries and trans kids and whatever else. Can you believe I got fired? Can you believe that Colin Kaepernick got fired? Wow, me either. I'm so dumb. I can't believe that. I've worked in the video game industry, okay? If you say something about trans people, you go, well, you're not allowed to work here because, like, half of us are trans.

Elon, I need to sue these guys. I got fired. Fuck off. Holly, you just fuck off. Yeah. She's telling people they can't get their money back for the 3D assets. She's, like, on there arguing with them. She's like, there's no refunds after 48 hours.

Like, 48 hours? That's not very long. I feel like I should get a year to discover the trickery that you've employed against me. You tricked me into buying a 3D fucking render gallery. Why are you arguing with this motherfucker? He's clearly a fan of mine. I'm fucking with you.

He's definitely trolling you. Great community managing idiot. They're not too bright. Great community managing idiot. They're not too bright at the rip-a-verse. Lieutenant Fluffy says, Holy shit, Vito's observation was hilarious. Richard was a theater kid. And he got oddly defensive when Vito wanted more live shows. Reminder, this would have been a super chat if Vito had weighed in.

Oh, okay. So even though I was right, I have to be punished. People are punishing you because you're not weighing in. Well, I brought in a comment on that same topic. What? Well, because... Okay, we were arguing about whether or not we need to do more live shows or not. Okay, need already.

You're framing it. Look, I understand. A lot of people are like, I want the live shows to be special. I get it. Okay, we don't have to do one all the time. I think they still would be special. Well, you said you wanted 20 people outside of like Arby's in a parking lot.

To listen to you do stand-up that you don't have. And then I acquiesced that I do have stand-up. I have some new jokes I wrote. What are they? I got one about... Is one about Satan? Is one about Satanic Panic? No. I bet it is. It's actually about Asian people. So I thought I'd save that for you.

It's a good Asian joke that I wrote. And then there's actually, you know what sucks, though? There's a stand-up night, like, literally in my neighborhood, like a block from me. I'm like, oh, that's cool. I could go, and I could try out my jokes, and I could meet comedians. It's every me. I'm like, oh, that's cool. I could go and I could try out my jokes and I could meet comedians. It's every Friday. I'm like, oh.

After the show. Go there. I don't know how late it goes. You think they're done doing stand-up and doing cocaine by 9 o'clock? I gotta see what times they do it. Maybe I'll swing by. I assume they're, yeah, I don't know.

Okay, so you're gonna be doing stand-up there. Yeah, people can come by. That could be my show. Maybe I'll be running the show pretty soon. Okay. Anyway, as Special Ed Class said on YouTube, Dick is a sad, uncreative, lazy alcoholic who was ruined by a little list

and can't do his crap improv routines anymore. Sad. Vito is right. Do live shows. You aren't better than them. You make a lazy internet show drunk. Do live shows. You aren't better than them. You make a lazy internet show drunk. Do live shows. Can you ban the term alcoholic and...

Lazy? No. Uncreative? I want lazy. Usually people are referring to you. Yeah. Just alcoholic. Ban alcoholic from the channel.

Anybody who puts alcoholic in there. Yeah. I think we should look at when we did the last live show. I think it's been a while. It feels like yesterday. It feels like yesterday, but time's arrow moves live show. I think it's been a while. It feels like yesterday. But time's arrow moves swiftly. And I think we're due.

Alexa Dame says, you know what, Vito? I'm starting to like you. You're like the Italian version of Nick Fuentes. You even brought stats to the Asian question. My racism is cheeky and fun. And Nick Fuentes' racism is also kind of cheeky and fun. His is hilarious. What are you going to do?

Keith Filibeck says, Vito has this idea that he's worth having kids with so that he can have an army to do the things he's already too lazy to do, baffling because of how obviously unlikely this is to ever occur without him literally paying for a surrogate child. I don't know about that. Which he'd never be approved of as a single guy.

You can be a... No, okay. I don't know how... I actually read that comment and I was like, I don't know how hard it is for a single guy to get approved for surrogacy.

I don't think they care, though. Women? Yeah. It's pretty cheap. Like a couple drinks. Well, you have to go through some sort of agency But I assume they just want money

Well Dick The agency of no Does that bring me to One of my favorite segments Yes Well then I think the audience Should hear these three words

Vote It up You just gotta vote it up Or you're letting Vito down Even if he breaks the scale, you must vote now. God damn it. You just must listen to me or kill your family. Voted up.

The biggest problem. Got a show now. Voted up, folks. Reverend Scott. Wow. Fantastic singer. What are the odds of you getting on the scale today? Reverend Scott.

What do you think? Well, I mean, we only got 750 people watching. What's the point of that? So if we get 1,000, you'll do it? No, I wouldn't say that. 1,500? What will you get?

I'm not getting on the scale. Should we guess your weight? It's not the segment. The segment is not guess your weight fun time. The segment is voted up. The segment where we revisit past problems

and perhaps put them in a new context. Dick, you did bring up the topic of satanic panic. Oh, yeah. Which is back in the news. This is a problem from episode 77. Well, as you may have seen, Has Been Hotel, a new animated cartoon show from Amazon,

has become the center of controversy as it draws criticism from Christian groups for its fictionalized portrayals of Lucifer. Wait, was it fictionalized? I thought that was real. It is definitely an original take on the Bible. Does he not do those things? Apparently not allowed to do. The Bible is apparently...

Some people are treating it as a historical event. They're like, no, no, no, Lucifer actually did this or whatever else. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah. They even made the angels real for you guys, like spinny wheels. Yeah, they made the cool spinny wheel angels. Look, I understand that for people who haven't seen this show, it's clearly an art school kid, gay fantasy about little animal people running around hell or whatever.

Okay, I get it. It looks hella gay. But, you know, it's not for you it's for it's for the fanciful art house kids i get it they like this shit yeah yeah it's got a lot of singing and dancing oh it does yeah apparently it's like very uh a lot of people were mad because this is it was actually created by a youtuber did you know that no so she's an animator. She had a big YouTube channel lady. Yes. She's always the subject of a lot of controversy, though.

And people were mad that she didn't use the same voice actors that were used in the original YouTube. She sold them out. She sold them out. Oh, that's dirty. I was like, that is dirty. But then they said, well, the reason is that it has kind of morphed into more of a musical show. They couldn't sing. So they got actual Broadway performers to be the voice actors.

Oh, God. So they're mad at the Satan part and not about all this shit. They should be mad about the singing. Yeah. Okay. Point is, let the gay, weird kids make their stupid, fanciful cartoons. They're having fun. God, can you guys get over like,

oh, but it says that Satan was a good guy and heaven is the bad guys. I'm like, who cares? Satan thinks he is a good guy. Satan would definitely believe that. Satan's not in hell going, oh man, I really fucked up. That was a good plan.

I was actually surprised that Tim Pool had a good take though. He was like, well, it's like fiction. And I'm like, yeah, it's fiction. Why are we coming down? I'm just going to be in hell with all these guys. Matt Walsh needs to be like, you're having too much fun. You better be suffering more. I'm like, man, we're already fucking in hell.

What are you talking about? Don't worry about it. Again, it's one of these situations where I'm like, what am I supposed to do on a planet where a bunch of people believe there's magic? I'd like to see him make a show about Islam! Well, no, man, because those people behave really poorly.

So I don't know why you're weirdly invoking Islam. That's a good point. I should be grateful that you're not like that. I already don't like that. It's a very good point. I am grateful. Christians should be very happy when fiction is poking fun at them because it's saying

you're a more advanced people. We like you more. Yeah. We like you. That's why we're making fun of this. We know you're not going to go crazy and cut off somebody's head because of it. That's a good thing for Christians. Yeah, that's called tolerance and acceptance.

That's honestly the best part about you guys is that you let us dunk on Jesus and you don't murder all of us about it. Anyway, Satanic Panic is currently number 436. Feels like it should be higher. Only 72 upvotes. That's it? I think we got a lot of Christ children in the audience who believe Satan is truly taking down the world.

Well, Dick, that brings me to my second voted up, which is a little something I call Boycott of the Week. Boycott of the Week. Well, Dick, we've had a lot of boycotts

going on right now as relating to the state of Israel and Gaza continuing their war. Currently, dozens of companies find themselves at the center of controversy as consumers and advocacy groups express concerns over these companies' perceived support for Israel. A new viral video from the children of Gaza is letting shoppers know which companies they should avoid. And I have brought that in to help educate our audience. The kids are telling me where to shop? The kids are going to let you know. And how can you say no to a sad Palestinian child?

You can go fuck yourself. Hold on. Hold on. Well, let's see which companies we have to avoid. Fucking assholes. Hold on. You haven't said anything. All on. Hold on. Well, let's see which companies we have to avoid. Fucking assholes. Hold on. You didn't even say anything. All right.

All right. All right. So we're starting off. Starbucks. Okay. Oh, KFC. Oh, come on. McDonald's.

Oh, Doritos. Come on. Pringles I can deal with. I can deal with that. Soap, fine. No more Nutella. Oh, my. Pepsi. Coke. Come on. I can deal with that. Soap, fine. No more Nutella. Oh, my. Pepsi, Coke.

Come on. Coca-Cola and Pepsi. Then what the fuck am I going to drink? Nike, okay. That's fine. What the fuck is that? What the fuck was that juice? Buenos.

Buenos. Macadamia nuts. Cadbury. Snickers. I'll give up the Snickers. Nivea yogurt. Boy, cut. There you go. Those are the children of... Cadbury. Snickers. I'll give up the Snickers. Nivea yogurt. Boycott. There you go.

Those are the children of Gaza are imploring you to avoid it. Look at this lazy motherfucker. He didn't even pick it up. He gave him the best one. All right, buddy. You're Coke. You got Coke. You better not fuck up.

All right. You look the most. You look the darkest. So it's really going to hit. These Americans, they love black people. We love brown children. They don't know, really. Once you get a certain level of dark, they're just like, oh, it's George Floyd.

I don't know. So you're doing coke. Whatever, man. Fuck you. Jamal did not take the assignment seriously. You fucked up, dude. He's too busy focused on his cool bike. Where'd they get all these BMX bikes?

I don't know, man. Everybody in Palestine is just riding around having fun. Wow. This is a big fuck up for Gaza. Is it? Yeah. America's taking McDonald's over our own kids. Yeah.

So you guys can eat shit. They got the guy from Sandlot here That rapes the lifeguard That looks like a Yeah I was gonna say How is this a Palestinian kid What is this clown doing How did he sneak in

That's a child actor Buddy look at the camera Don't fucking look at the director Look right Look at the camera Don't you know You're right This is the best take they got out of you kids

What is this guy doing He thinks he's at a soccer game Holding it above his head This was like a one shot and done huh What the fuck is this guy doing? He thinks he's at a soccer game Holding it above his head This was like a one shot and done, huh? What the fuck is this? Metamucil? One take Charlie It looks like a

It looks like tea Is that a jug of tea? Get him a hat or something Fucking Charlie Chan here They got him all They all got him all Safety vests What was that about?

We gotta see the face Come on, come on Do it again No more bueno bars. He was looking to make sure he didn't hold it upside down. The kids aren't even enunciating either. I don't even know what they're saying. All right, kids.

Have you ever heard a cat throw up? That's what we want out of you. It's going to America, so you gotta make it nice and guttural. They fucking love it there. Well, guys, point is, if you're looking to support the state of Gaza, pay attention to these children and their poignant message. Okay. Boycott of the Week currently number 84 with 491 upvotes.

Boycott of the Week. Is that all? Vote it up. You just gotta vote it up. Or you're letting Vito down. Even if he breaks the scale You must vote now You just must listen to me

Vote for your family Vote it up, the biggest problem Got a show now Here's a bit I have. It's called, I wanted to get a theme song for it, but I didn't get it. Okay. It's called What the Fuck is Eric July Saying Here? Maybe we can come up with one.

What the fuck? Too many, no, too many jingles. Too many jingles. No, it's never enough jingles. Hold on. I'm going to have to fight you on that. Everything needs a jingle. What is he saying here?

Okay. Uh. Do you want me to try to read it? Um. Okay, here. I got the jingle. It's, uh's Once Eric July says Once of the things

I've learned Is you have to accept others Apostrophe S Intentions for what it is What it is I've spoke about this The only reason I'm not going Scotch Earth

is due to business and what you're mentioning. What is Eric July saying with this statement? With this statement.

Okay. Scotch Earth. You know he said Scotch Earth twice? So there's no way that it's just like Does he really think I think he actually

thinks it's because somebody looked it up and they're like he said it twice Because he said it before like two weeks ago And Eric July as Ethan has pointed out Is the kind of guy who will hear A word or a term And just start using it instinctively I'm going scotch earth

Yeah so I think He's like the black big Lebowski Somebody must have used the term scorched earth around him. Or scorched earth. And he heard Scotch Earth. And somehow he heard Scotch Earth. And the other thing is I want to say, okay, well, maybe it's like a text-to-speech error or whatever, but he has Twitter Blue so he can edit his tweets whenever he wants.

So anytime I tweet something, I read it again. Oh, he doesn't use speech-to-text, does he? I don't know, but I read it. I've spoke about this. The only reason I'm not going Scotch Earth, Scotch Earth, is due to business. But even your text-to-speech, doesn't it kind of know phrases? Of course. If you say Scotch Earth, it would go, oh, well, clearly he's saying Scotch Earth.

Let me see if I can even make it say Scotch Earth. I bet you can make it say Scotch Earth if you really enunciate. But he hasn't. The only reason I ain't going Scotch Earth on these motherfuckers is because of business. Okay, yeah. Scotch Earth happened. Well, maybe it's

just his particular African American vernacular, which the racist phone companies are not attuning for. Alright, it's your problem first. It's my problem. Okay, well Dick, my problem is one of my classic alliterations here. I'm calling it derivative

doofuses. These are people who complain about things. And what are they complaining about right now? Well, there's a new video game that just came out. I actually just... You ended last show on a video game problem. This is not a video game that just came out. I actually just... You ended last show on a video game problem. This is not a video game problem. Now you've picked up on a video game. It is related to all sorts

of media problems. This is just one example. It is media. And I should have brought up some tweets and maybe I can bring... Maybe not. Okay. So there's a new video game. It's called Pal World. It's a world of pals. Okay. So there's a new video game. It's called Pal World. It's a world of pals.

Okay. And it's like an open world Pokemon game. Okay. Online, multiplayer. You catch little buddies. You put them to work in your farms. You catch Pokemon. You catch Pokemon.

Okay. It's a little more mature. Or they catch themselves and sell them to you. The Pokemon catch themselves. And then they sail over to your farm and you buy them. Yeah. No. I think you catch themselves and sell them to you? The Pokemon catch themselves. And then they sail over to your farm and you buy them. Yeah. No, I think you catch them. Okay. And also you have a gun. Cut out the middle man. Cut out

the middle man. Alright. So it looks fun. It's getting great reviews. It's in early access. I actually just bought it and maybe I'll be streaming it after the show when I get home. Looking forward to it. Are you going to be laying in bed like you were last time? Yeah, have you seen my bed streams? They're going great. I heard people complaining about it. About what? How? Why? You laying in bed. They're you going to be laying in bed like you were last time? Yeah. Have you seen my bed streams? They're going great. I heard people complaining about it. About what?

How? Why? You laying in bed. They're very disturbed by you laying in bed while you're playing video games. It's comfortable. Yeah. Usually, that's a reason for something to be disturbing. It's comfortable.

Yeah. Well. I got a monitor mount next to my bed so it folds in. Then I can pull it out and I can see the chat while I'm lying in bed. But that's a story for another day. Are people watching that shit? Well, I don't have a camera set up. I'm worried the second they have the camera and they're like,

am I just watching a fat guy lie in bed and play video games? But that way I can stream and it's just comfortable. I can stream for more time. We're getting off topic. Point is, Pal World is out and I'm seeing... Is this an ad for Pal World? This is not an ad for Pal World.

Go to my Twitter real quick. I think I retweeted a tweet about this. People are complaining and saying, well, this is just derivative. This is a ripoff of Pokemon

and a bunch of internet autistic kids. Well, that's what I'm saying. No, I mean, who gives a shit about this stupid game, Pal World? What the fuck do you have on your Twitter? Look what's on his fucking laptop. I'm talking about myself jacking off.

I hope I don't jack off. All right, where is it? All right, I'll find it. This, Pal World? No, hold on. Wait, wait, wait, was that it? Yeah. No, no, no, no, no.

I don't think people understand Pal World. This is what you're using your win for? Yeah, hold on. Wait, wait, wait. Was that it? Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. I don't think people understand Palworld. This is what you're using your win for? Yeah, there we go. Is there a video game? There we go, this one. All right. Can you bring that up? Yeah.

This is what they're mad about. This is what they're complaining about. Okay, so on the left is a Pokemon character. On the right is a Pal World character. And all these people are going, well, this is an outrage. Look. Look at that tail. Look at the long bunny ears. Clearly that

belongs to Pokemon. I can't believe they would do this. I'm not like cancer, man. That's a problem. Well, listen, I have more examples, but I'm just saying these people do not- Okay, Pal World, yeah. Yeah, okay.

The problem is that they don't understand. They think this is copyrightable. They think that if you come up with a bunny character that has feet and ears that runs around, you can catch it. That's a copyrighted thing. Is this a big problem, though? These people that cry about Pal World? Well, it is a problem, yes, because it's people finding stupid reasons to complain about stuff that is actually cool and different. This is a bad reason to complain about stuff.

This is stupid. What is? People complaining about Pal World? What else? What are your other examples of this? Well, I was going to say that what people don't understand, okay, these people who come out and they say this is a ripoff of that and this is derivative of this.

Okay. Oh, derivative. Okay, yeah. Derivation. Okay. Whatever it is. Yeah. Okay.

People don't understand that all ideas come from existing ideas. Pokemon is 25 fucking years old. Obviously, the people who grew up with Pokemon are going to start taking and borrowing from things they like. I mean, it's clearly ripped off. But it doesn't matter because they can't copyright that. Yeah, but it sucks. It's obviously ripped off. Okay, Omni-Man is just Superman.

Who cares? Not really. Yes. No, first of all, he has a fucking mustache. Were you gonna say he's an alien? He's Superman with a fucking mustache. No, first of all, he's a dick, but better than that, he has a fucking mustache.

How is that similar at all? You know what? Date a woman and say, I'm going to fuck a mustache and see how similar she thinks you are. So if I put mustaches on all the Pokemon, it's okay. Totally different guy. If I do Pikachu with a mustache, Pokemon, it's okay. Totally different guy. Totally different guy. If I do Pikachu with a mustache, I got a new character?

What is... When I say the following word, what's the first thing that comes to mind? Disguise. It was mustache. And you didn't want to say it. It was mustache and glasses. I don't think that's correct. That's a fucking clear ripoff.

It's not a clear ripoff. It's a different thing. It even has gay little things on his pants and fucking tips on his feet. That's a total rip-off. It doesn't matter. Okay, look. It's clearly inspired by. It's not bullshit. You can take inspiration from a 25

year old franchise that every child in America grew up with. That makes perfect sense. Okay? Things are supposed to take from other things, and because we live in a fucking terminally online fucking generation of autistic morons, they go, well, I can see that this came from this, and blah blah blah.

It does not matter. That's everything that you see. Are you pissed that people are calling Superkiller a ripoff? Okay, that's what I thought. Superkiller's what? The Boys? Well, they call it The Boys. It's The Boys, except I don't have to pay Amazon Extra to ship me episodes of the boys That's the difference

I've had people tell me that my exciting comic book super killer is a horrible rip off Look at what you've done to this paper Dick doesn't want me to play with my papers My exciting comic book super killer, which is a labor of love, obviously.

For the artist. Okay, for everyone involved. Are you paying that guy? Am I paying the artist for my comic? Well, Yellow Flash isn't paying his artist. I know, I am paying. And his house burned down. He's living in a fucking dumpster with his family.

He didn't even have Christmas. Not only am I paying my artist, but I have told him multiple times, if you ever need an advance to cover any sort of thing that's going on in your life, please let me know. I do not want you. What's his email? I'm going to tell him to... No, I'm not going to give you his email. Leave him the fuck alone. Hit Vito up for some cash, man.

I already have those weirdos who are like, I'm going to research Vito's artist and blah, blah, blah. I'm like, can you just leave him alone? Will you just let him draw the comic? You fucking psychopaths. Okay. Because you took too long between announcing

it and then it coming out. If it even does. It's not too long. It's a perfectly reasonable amount of time. If Ethan VanSkyver gets

whatever it is. December would have been reasonable. Ethan got what? Two and a half years to make his rainbow brute. Okay. Everybody loves him.

He's made like 50 comics or a thousand comics or something. And they were late before. All his comics have been late. My comic is not even. None comics.

My comic is barely late. Okay. And it's not actually. Okay. It's 10% late. It's not late at all. When did you announce it? Like a year ago?

It's perfectly fine. It's on time. One out of 12. That's about 8% late. When are we getting the silly pants skating routine? Any day now. Yeah? Yeah. How's that book you're working on? I'm never writing a book.

Well, you already wrote one book. That's enough. Anyway, as I've been told, my book is a rip-off of The Boys. It's a rip-off of Kick-Ass. It's a rip-off of Wanted. A comic book which I think I read like a million years ago.

It's also a rip off of Punisher Kills the Marvel Universe, a comic I have not read. It's mostly a rip off of Rick and Morty, though. Because it's like another dimension and stuff. I think there's some obvious. A butt dimension. It's not going to be a butt dimension. Bones are calling pizza stores Delivering humans Those are the good seasons You can't call shit on those seasons

Those are some of the fun ones I did see that Ladies have been writing all that show And the new season was not that good Point is look yes My comic draws inspiration from things That I have enjoyed across my lifetime I have said up front What many of the inspirations are.

You don't have to tell me that my comic is derivative of other things. I know that because I create stuff. Yeah. Okay? Anyone who makes shit will tell you. Okay, let's put it this way. Has Eric July ever said what he was inspired by to make ISOM? No. Money. Yeah, inspired by money

and his desire to own a forklift. And that's it. You better watch out with all this inspired by shit. Why? Because I'm going to get sued for ripping off shit? It's just getting a little bit too much. You gotta start wearing a scarf and little glasses and a beret and talk about what an artiste you are. All your favorite

shit was ripped off of something else. Batman is Zorro plus Sherlock Holmes. That's it. And then he dresses as a bat. Okay, Star Wars is just the movie. The Hidden Fortress from Kurosawa with a little Flash Gordon mixed in there. Okay, again, Omni-Man is just Superman with a mustache. Or is it Jimmy Seville?

Sure. Yeah, or Seville. It's just updated for a new. Jared is just Jimmy Seville. Sure. Yeah, Seville. Just updated for a new generation and he sells sandwiches this time. Why not? Okay. You guys like cyberpunk shit? You play that cyberpunk video game? You like watching whatever? It's all Blade Runner. Who are you lecturing? It's all Blade Runner. All of these people.

These people who are making You can take this Pokemon shit off the screen by the way. It's the same thing. It's obviously a ripoff. I saw them make a tweet, and they're like, the reason we have to take a stand against this is because if we allow them to steal from Pokemon, next thing you know, they're going to be stealing from us,

which is, again, that fucking thing of Bow Black said, where he's like, oh, I can't give out my deals because someone's going to steal them. Okay, yes, if you create a fucking genre-expanding fucking phenomenon like Pokemon, people are going to steal from it. But most of you are retards and morons and will never make anything of value in your life, so stop worrying about other people stealing Pokemon, because then they might steal your fucking Pokemon.

That's probably not—there's no chance it's going to happen. The fact that you're arguing about it on Twitter already tells me that you're probably not making anything of value that anyone would ever want to steal. Okay? Because if you don't understand that your own ideas are derivative of other ideas as well, then you're probably making shit. Everything good comes from something else. Okay?

That's it. Okay? That's it. On like a scale of 10, like how much do you feel like you represent like artistry and creativity? I'd say I'm one of the greatest writers, living writers. That's what it sounds like. In America. Creators. I think we all know that.

Creators or writers? Creators. I'm going to say writers sounds better. If you had to rank you, Kanye, and Tolkien, J-R-R Tolkien. Tolkien. Tolkien. How would you rank the three of you? Kanye, number one.

Me, number two. Tolkien, number three. Because you only wrote the one thing. What if there was elves? Yeah, okay. What if they all came from a magic land? I mean, that's obviously a rip-off, though, with your example.

No, it isn't. They look different. It's fine if they're... Look, again, when Superman first came out, do you think that all the superhero characters didn't just look like Superman? The point is that they were inspired and then you start having permutations and whatever else. Yeah,. He's just like a guy

this is like a gay mouse with like a You know flares and stuff you make one of the doesn't exist one of the top 20 franchises of all time the fact that we Don't have endless club which we do have endless close. There was like a we have to I should be making a Pokemon. Okay, cuz it's fucking everybody should be making it I got in trouble cuz one time I made a video. You know how everybody always makes like fan video games where they're like, I made my own Pokemon. It's called Pokemon Butt Version. Okay.

And I'm like, don't do that. Stop wasting your time. Just go make your own idea that is, have you seen this new Castlevania game? No. Do you want to see a video game? I know. I don't want to see a video game. Okay. But instead of making a... Do you like Castlevania? You know those games? Not really.

It's like too slow. Okay, whatever. I like the Castlevania games a lot and there's a studio and they're making a game and it's called the Transylvania Adventure of Simon Quest. Okay. Ripoff, obviously. Yeah, obvious ripoff. But it's Dracula.

That's public domain. They can just do that. You don't have to make fucking your own little Pokemon. Man, you gotta unplug from this shit or you're gonna go crazy. You're gonna start seeing only in terms of these online arguments about retarded shit. Like, who ripped off what mouse? And it's like, everything's a remix shit. I just think that we

should celebrate. Wait, who's calling? Hello? Hello? Oh. Got me all worried for a second. I just think that we have a generation that is all precious about protecting their Pokemon. I think it's just crazy. It's just a luxury.

Why are you simping for the Pokemon? Because who gives a shit? It's just retards. It's just about your comic again. It's not just about my comic again. It's just about fucking like I know better than everybody. Shut the fuck up. It's about people simping for a multinational corporation.

They think Nintendo is their best friend. Yeah. Which makes no fucking sense. And they're like, we have to protect the sanctity of Pokemon. No, you don't. It has nothing to do with you. I don't have to argue with every person. I'm not arguing.

I'm just saying. Okay. Who are you enlightening? That's what I want to know. This tweet has 5,000 likes and like- Who gives a shit? It's got almost a million views of people going, I cannot believe that someone would do this to Pokemon.

This is horrible. Yeah, all right, all right, all right. It's fucking stupid. Is that it? Derivative doofuses. I can't believe that that was your problem. Derivative doofuses. Why don't you bring in another dead guy in Ukraine and then we can hear a good problem, huh?

Here's one that people can relate to. Yeah. Home repairs. It's not just about online. Not our audience. Nope. Yes. Not your audience. Nope. Yes. Not your audience.

Oh, your audience is all homeowners? You're arguing about fucking Pokemon and comic books all day. My audience is trapped forever. Home repairs, Vito. That's a real problem. Sure. For real people. Not arguing about cartoon mice.

Just make the landlord pay for it. Yeah, I bet you do. I do. I bet you call in all the time. Hey, there's a crack in the wall pay for it. Yeah, I bet you do. I do. I bet you call in all the time. Hey, there's a crack in the wall. I spilled some lemonade. I spilled some Mountain Dew on the carpet. The law says you have to replace the carpet every 18 months if I ask.

I do need to call my landlord. I actually don't bother my landlord at all. Can you send the guy out to trim the outside? I don't go outside. I don't go outside. I don't go outside for stuff. They remember you exist and they jack up your rent. I want to exist in this perfect

nobody remembers I'm there situation. It never fucking ends. I got my gutter fixed and I went up I went on the roof to see what I just paid $500 for. And I see that the other gutters on the other side is totally destroyed. I'm like, why didn't you fix I told them to fix this one, and they're like,

well, that will only cost like $100, and our minimum's like $300. So how about we clean everything out, and we'll fix it? And I was like, yeah, okay. Here's $300. And I went up there to see it, and there's a gigantic crack on the other side of the gutter that they cleaned out!

Without telling you. So you didn't... You knew that there was a limit I couldn't hit. There was a minimum. And you went up there and started cleaning it and saw it and said, Ah, fuck them. Yeah.

That was the deal. You just paid us to fix the thing and clean the gutters. Can't you just drop another gutter thing in there? Now I got to start over. Do it again. Well, maybe you shouldn't live in a house precariously perched over a shit pit. Maybe that's leading to all your problems. That's not what happens.

That's not how shit breaks. A friend of mine is putting in, fixing the lake at their house. They've got like a lake front. That's something everyone can identify with. Fixing their lakefront property. The guy comes out. No, no, no. The lake's all mucky and shitty.

He's like, we've got to do something about this. Bring a guy out. He goes, oh, yeah, I'll come out. My consulting fee is $200 for me to just come out there, and then we'll talk about it. Jesus Christ. Why? Did he agree to that?

Well, he will. He complained to me, so I'm sure that's phase one we'll talk about it. Jesus Christ. Why? Did he agree to that? Well, he will. He complained to me, so I'm sure that's phase one of I'm doing it is texting me with can you fucking believe this? Yeah. Do you get a $200 credit towards fixing the lake? It's just $200 to look at a lake and go, yeah, you're fucked. It's $200 to

look at it and go, well, you know, this is what I'll do. I'll dump sand all over it. Okay. Can you just send them some pictures? No, no, no. They will never do that. They'll never do that. Contractors, huh? I got some non-racist stats for you. It's not contractors. California home repair jumped up 67%

in a decade. Wow. Went up 6% last year. Wow. You don't even know. You're so busy crying about people crying about comic books. You don't know what real problems are so busy crying about people crying about comic books. You don't know what real problems are. I'm going to fit a Neo Geo machine in my tiny apartment. That's the only home ownership problems I've got.

If you had a home, you wouldn't be able to afford Neo Geo machines ever. I know. $6,000. This will really bake your noodle. Bake my biscuits. Roof repairs, $10,000. Fix a roof. Like a leaky roof.

Yeah. Water heater, $1,000, Vito. You think about that. $1,000 of what? How many toys did you get? I don't know. I could get a lot of cool shit. You're living the dream.

I am kind of living the dream, huh? Painting, exterior, $5,000. How's your, I know you had a problem with your sink. More money. What did that cost you? I don't even want to talk about that one. That one was way too much. Oh, you brought in the home repair problem, but you're not going to talk about home repair. Because that one's too much.

That one's not fun. Why was it too much? Five grand. To fix your sink? To change the, yeah. To change all the pipes? Yeah. What kind of pipes you got now? Brand new. Whatever is the legal minimum for me to have.

That's why you have problems. You have to invest in success. You're lucky. You don't know how good you have it. Well. Just being able to call my father a fig head. You got all that new Maddox money. You can pay for it. Not anymore.

One month of Maddox money. You can pay for it. Not anymore. Maddox paid for those fucking pipes. One month of Maddox shit. In my gutters. Handled your dumb pipe bullshit. Alright, what's your next problem? My problem, Dick. This is one we can all relate to.

Driving, huh? You're in your car. It better be better than this comic shit. This is the first week where we haven't told each other our problems. I would have said another fucking comic problem. What do the first week where we haven't told each other our problems. I would have said

another fucking comic problem. What do you mean another? Name any other comic problem I've brought in. Any problem that is I know more about this than these people. Well, that's every problem.

Well, that's it. All you are fucking stupid as hell. You gotta be better than gay mice if you're gonna do that. It's not gay mice. It's clearly a EV type situation. You're driving your car. It's nighttime.

And you as a driver want to help other drivers on the road. You see someone driving. Could be any sex. Could be any race. Their lights are not on. Flash your lights at them. You flash your lights. And you go, that's it. That's all I need to do. They don't turn lights at them. You flash your lights. Yeah. And you go, that's it.

That's all I need to do. I don't turn on their lights. You do it again. You do it again? Oh, I keep, I'm going. I'm flashing. I'm flashing. No, that's too fast.

Fuck you. No, I do it once. How far away are you noticing that they don't have their lights on? I'll see them. I'll see them at like the light. We're both at the light like across from each other. Like we're both at a stoplight. Okay.

Bop, bop. Bop, bop. They don't turn it on Alright well that's their problem then Well that's my problem Dick is ignored signals Ignored Driving signals Okay It's you trying your best To be a responsible motorist

And help other people out And they don't know Anytime somebody flashes their high beams at me I know what that means your best to be a responsible motorist and help other people out. And they don't know. Anytime somebody flashes their high beams at me, I know what that means. Flash yours back at them. Well, yeah, make sure your lights are on. That's simple. Okay.

Why do we not? How often does this happen to you? A lot. All the time. People don't have their lights on? People don't have their lights on. On the way over here. I had already had this problem ready to go. No, I think you're just too impatient.

Because, like, even when I, as soon as I sit down, you're like, hey, start the video. I'm like, I got, like, a bunch of stuff to go. Dude, they're driving down the fucking street and their lights aren't on. So there's a bunch of lights on the street. Who cares? Okay, another way you might try to alert other motorists of what's going on is by using your horn. No, never. What do you mean, never? Never on is by using your horn. No, never. What do you mean never?

Never, ever. Use the horn. I had picked up my meal from the local drive-thru salad establishment, and I was stuck trying to get out of the parking lot because there was just, again, a person of an indiscriminate gender and race. Okay. And I just, little tiny a person of an indiscriminate gender and race. Okay. And I just, little tiny, beep, beep.

You know? You honked at someone to leave the parking lot? They were in the line for the drive-thru, but it was one of these things where the drive-thru is wide enough, so you're supposed to be all the way to the left if you're in the drive-thru, and the right's supposed to be open for other cars to get by, right? They're like smack dab in the middle, okay, with a bunch of room in front of them. And I think they must... So two people are supposed to go through the drive-thru at the same time?

No, it's that the left lane is the drive-thru. The right lane is to park your car in the parking lot. Oh, okay. Okay? And they're blocking the right side because their big ol' whatever the fuck SUV is just in the middle. Aren't they supposed to be reaching the window? I don't know what you're not getting

here. Well, you're saying drive-thru and you're saying they're like way out of the drive-thru. Yes, they're way out of the drive-thru. They should have gotten more into the... Well, it was wrapped around the building. It was before they reached the menu. Okay. So they took too big of a turn. They took too big of a turn, but they had lots of room to pull up.

So I give them a little... Now, I think they thought stupidly or something that I was trying to jump the line in the drive-thru or something. I'm like, no, I just literally need you to pull up into the drive-thru lane so I can go around you on the right. I do it again. I do it a third time. They refuse to move. And I go, okay, well, there's actually, and this is crazy, there's actually more room on the left than on the right.

So what I'm going to do is I'm actually going to drive around them on the left and then go around the front of their car to exit. So the second I start doing that and I'm like, you know, right next to them, they lay on their horn. Like I'm doing something wrong. So I park in front of them and I get out of the car and I go,

I'm trying to leave the drive-thru. Why did you park and get out? You dumb, because I wanted to yell at this dumb bitch because I'm like, why are you laying on the horn? You are wrong. I'm like, why are you laying on the horn? You are wrong. I'm leaving. Okay. Just let me do this.

I've decided to maneuver around you because you refuse to move your fucking car for some reason. It's drivers who are not remaining aware. We have these things available to us. We have the horn. We have the little lights, turn signals. I can let people know when people are like honking They're like why are you not going straight? I'm like well you can see

These things that are on my car you could do you need me to stick my arm out the window? Do I gonna do one of these yeah, you do that. You know I'm taking a right turn What happened after you yelled at the lady? She started recording me And I was like what are you gonna do with like, what are you going to do with that? What are you going to do with that? Oh, I hope so. She's like, I'm going to call the cops.

And I'm like, I want you to call the cops and tell them. What race was she? She was like Hispanic or something. Oh, okay. Hispanic lady. I was like, you should call the cops. She turned left in a driveway? She was trying to turn towards the menu thing, but she left this giant cab. And this is, you know, an audio show.

I'm going to draw a guy. Okay, and then I'll describe it. Okay, this is my car going this way. This is her car. Well, where's the building? Hold on. This is the building. Where's the window?

And the window is over here. Where's the window? And the window is over here. Where's the ordering thing? So this is the way you would... She would be going around the building like that. Yeah, but where's the ordering? Where do you order food? You order right here. Where do you pick up the food?

On the building, the fucking... Why are you getting so upset? See what I mean about getting so upset? Okay, so you order at that thing, and then you drive around here. And you drive around here. And where's the exit to the parking lot? Okay, so then my car, after I got my food here...

So you were getting food? Yeah, after I got my food... No, I already got it. So I had gotten my food from here, right? Okay. From the second window. Now, and here's the street. Okay, where's the street exit? Where's the exit to the street? This is the exit to the street, okay? So I'm wrapping around the building and I want to go out this way

Okay I can't because of her giant fucking car which is in the middle of two lanes Yeah, am I sure that I couldn't get back yes Because that's why there was so much room that I was able to maneuver between her and the building which is insane. How is there that much room between her and the building? There was enough room in front of her and the next person

Yes! There was like nothing there she just needed to pull up so I could get around her. Was she waiting in line? She was waiting for the drive-thru. She was like last in waiting for the drive-thru. She was like last in line for the drive-thru. How do you know she wasn't just parked there? Well, I don't know why she would park right in the middle of the fucking thing. Okay, yeah, she's an idiot.

So when I honk, just fucking move a little bit. You're just honking at a random woman. What if she was just parked there to get her food together? She wasn't. She was waiting for the drive-thru, okay? Because I was there for like 45 seconds. Just like, beep, beep. Beep, beep.

Okay. Point is that ignoring car signals. Yeah. Ignoring... Yeah, that's what I put. Ignored car signals. Honking high beams. Turn signals.

They're all there. All right. These problems are terrible This show is probably The worst one we've ever done Well let's just never do a show again I really I mean

All of This whole like Not discussing the problems beforehand I had a guy I don't think I don't think it was a good idea I had a guy And he came to fix my gutters

That was a bad one too But he didn't fix my other gutters I think I remember Having this argument On the first show The reason to tell them Is to think about them beforehand But we don't do that other gutters. I think I remember having this argument on the first show. The reason to tell them is to think about them beforehand. But we don't do that.

I do. You don't? You must. Even subconsciously, you must. I mean, I think about them and I'm ready to talk about them. There you go. Okay? It's not my fault that I come in and you immediately start shitting on my problem, which is perfectly reasonable.

Look at this shit, man. That's an obvious ripoff. All right. My problem is which was perfectly reasonable. Look at this shit, man. That's an obvious ripoff. Alright, my problem is fast food face grease. You're right. This is the worst episode. Yeah, I know. See, it's terrible. Alright, let's do voicemails. Let's do voicemails.

Just terrible. Terrible episode. Well, okay, here's the thing about this show. It's like, I don't know. I thought these were pretty good. No, it's like okay, here's the thing about this show. It's like, I don't know. I thought these were pretty good. No, it's like the... It's always rough when it's lecturing people who aren't there

about, like, I'm smarter than you. Okay. You blew it. You blew it! You didn't even... Fast food face grease! I told you that we should have done it after Ethan VanSkyver is... Don't pin this on me. This has nothing to do with me.

This is a perfectly reasonable show. We had a great voted up segment. I brought in a great video. Thank you. That was fun. The Palestinian kid one, it was pretty funny. That was pretty funny. Okay, we had some great comments.

We got some great voicemails. No, the voicemails are terrible too here watch listen hey dick and veto um so i usually listen to the podcast with the goss and you know just laugh and he's bad already with myself in any way or form but as a fucking today that has changed i fucking have beef with somebody right now he's got beef so for a living i make 3d renders using sketchup but because uh july decided to derail my entire livelihood and uh decided to outsource his comics to quote unquote uh illustrators in Brazil. I want to know this. Effectively making my beloved program a laughingstock. So he's a sketchup artist.

I have dedicated my entire career into 3D modeling and rendering very realistic and disturbingly veiny renders of penises. Okay, so he's doing a bit. I have a Twitter post with them. I'm talking about every penis is going to be a different race, different species, even fantasy creatures

that just come up in my imagination. You can't put dragon on your dick, son. Twitter, you can. What? You can? You can't? Alright. I told you. See? Horrible. You knew I was going to shut that shit off right away.

All right. Then there's... I got an email. You want an email? No, it's too late. No, hold on. No, no, no. I want to really... Here you go. If we're doing the worst show ever, I have the perfect... Next live show, I'm going gonna fly over from the UK so cookies

do not let Vito turn it into some bullshit, cheap, scribbling t-shirt selling nonsense. Make it good, and I fly over. English deal. It's gonna be a fucking slam poetry. I will not be talked into doing some shitty live show. Okay, hold on.

Hold on. You got that audio clip I sent you? Uh, yeah. Oh, hold on, hold on. You got that audio clip I sent you? Yeah. Oh, you were holding out on me? Yeah. All right. Hold on, hold on. Don't play yet. Okay.

So here's the deal. Episode 123, that was the last episode. Yeah. You apparently missed a TBF. That timestamp, 2-0-6-13. Someone has sent in a, they say this is a stinger you can use at timestamp 20613. Someone has sent in a, they say this is a stinger you can use to punish Dick every time he misses a TBF.

So this is our first ever submission for a TBF punishment clip. Let's hear it. I hate ass. That was fucking terrible. That's so annoying. Dick, you want me to make it even worse? That was sent in That's so annoying Dick you want me to make it even worse That was sent

I eat ass I think you're supposed to be saying I eat ass is that correct Yeah man that's a good one Alright well Dick do you want to know Who sent that in Well I'm going to tell you anyway Because it's part of the bit

And comes to us straight from the niggler You've been niggled my friend That's what you get Fuck That is a good one I wish the episode was better Because that's a good unveiling of that bit That's a very funny

Finally it's funny Everybody had such stupid ideas For what it should be You should watch Cuties if you miss one. All right. Well, now we can add that. You should say you love fat women. We can add that to the soundboard.

Here's how we're going to save this episode. We should watch Eric Gilles. There's no saving it. Shut up. It's done. Shut up. We should watch that. This is what a live show with 20 people would feel like, by the way.

It's a bad feeling. It's fine. It's a good show. Look, we got a little bit of time. We went through the problems quick. Just feels like we're warming up to a show that's not started. We should watch Eric July's 3D render video. What are they talking about?

We? We should put on the video. On the show? Yeah. Why the fuck would we do that? I don't know. I think you've been laying down streaming too much. All right, here we go. Oh, for fuck's sake. This is Jado.

Hi. I'm calling for Vito. Vito, this is for you, brother. I had to pause this last episode. I'm catching up. I've been out of the loop. Dude, you get shit on for your way. And I'm going to tell you something, brother.

Fuck all those idiots. Every fucking day. I'll tell you. I drink a pink monster Hawaiian pipeline punch every goddamn fucking morning. Cause that shit gets me going. That's my caffeine and sugar hit in the morning. If I don't drink that shit, I'm going to PTSD the shit out of somebody. So I drink every day.

Ooh, a lot of sugar calories. Big fucking deal. Cause you know what? You can drink your bullshit, have your cake, eat it too. Are you fucking farting again? No, I didn't fart. Why do you keep saying that? You know why you're bitter on the fucking computer?

You're angry. And you know what, Vito? It's time to go outside and fuck some shit up. So, Vito, let's break some shit together. Because I got proof. I got metrics. I don't do dumb shit counting calories. I have a fucking Apple Watch to do that shit for me. Okay. And I don't even track calories.

I do the knee cursors. I'm fucking moving all day, every day. So, veto. All right. All right. He's saying I don't have to count calories because he drinks a Hawaiian punch every day and he's fine. So, I'm going to take his diet advice.

That seems reasonable to me. Here is... I'm excited. Here his diet advice. That seems reasonable to me. Here is. I'm excited. Here's a joke. Okay. Hey, Dick. Hey, Vito.

You touched on this problem last episode with the wood problem. Right. But the biggest problem I have is when dudes make jokes about coming online. Okay. Like every time. And it will be in like innocuous shit. when dudes make jokes about coming online. Like every time, and it will be in like innocuous shit. Like I'm a huge F-sorter and I watch football. And I'll be like, Jordan loves stats from last game, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And someone will say, keep going.

I'm almost there. It's like, gross. Now I'm thinking about, or I'm going to need a new change of pants after that one. Like, stop making me think about you jizzing. Vote up wood, vote up jizz. Biggest problem, guys making jokes about cumming. And it's always predictable shit. All right, go fuck yourself. Do you remember in high school when, like, every joke was like, oh, you got cum on your shirt?

Do you have anything on you at all? On your shirt? Yeah, it'd be like, like, you know, you'd, like, spill something on your shirt. Oh, is that, like, cum? You at all On your shirt? Yeah, it'd be like You'd like spill something on your shirt So we'd go Oh, is that like cum? You got cum on your shirt? Yeah Yeah, did that stop?

Did we stop doing that? Nobody told me I remember For some reason I remember everyone always being like Hey, cum on you I have no idea what I'm talking about I'm trying to find where to load the show here. Okay.

I can never find anything. Hit create. Create? Yeah. Hit go live. Oh, go live? Yeah. Oh, jeez.

That's the opposite of what I would want to do. I know. It doesn't make any sense, but there you are. Okay. There we go. Now, this one works. I don't know why the other one wasn't working. We have fixed the show.

Okay. One more voicemail. Why don't we talk about all the things? Herex sexton wants a live show okay what's up this is rex sexton and i am perplexed as to why veto suddenly wants to engage with all these people at frequent live shows he has open disdain for fans who tried to give him tips on losing weight he has open disdain for fans who inquired about his call for a writing partner. When I introduced myself at the Philly live show, he was sulking in the corner,

looked at me like I had three heads. Granted, he was being accosted by some fat gay guy. He doesn't understand the emotional investment required to pretend to enjoy interacting with the chuckle-fuck listeners of the show on a semi-regular basis.

Go fuck yourself. I was not sulking at the Philly Live show. I was very friendly at the Philly Live show, okay? He's bitter, obviously lying and bitter about not being your writing partner. He doesn't know it yet. He's on the short list. You're on the short list, Rex Jackson. I haven't gotten back to you yet. Okay, that's it?

That's it. I mean, the last voicemail isn't back to you yet. Okay. That's it? That's it. I mean, the last voicemail isn't going to save this. It's not that bad. It's a good show. Even when the show's bad, it's good. It's fun. Unlistenable, I would say. Us arguing about the show being bad is entertaining.

It's unlistenable. All right. Especially compared to last week. The Jasmine stuff. That was phenomenal. That was amazing Do you even want to read these super chats or Can you stop coming down on our show

Which everyone loves Okay It's a great show Alright I mean I guess Wow Who's shitting your biscuits buddy

It's everybody I did I think I think we did a great show We had a lot of laughs. I think if you would stop coming down on it, we could find more humor to engage in. There's just none. You can't just give up on the show.

Like, midway through the show. You gotta commit. All right. Do you want to read these? Or do you want me to? Can we wait a sec? Are we doing Super Chats right away? What else is there to do?

That's the format of the show. It's voicemails and then super chats. I want to check in. How's everything going? What do you mean how's it going? Fine, I guess. Anything exciting been going on? No. Not really. What'd you do this week? Who gives a fuck what I did this week? I do. I want to know more. I don't want to

talk about what I did this week ever. Well, I had to know more. I don't want to talk about what I did this week ever. Well, I had a great week. We worked very hard on the comic with my... More fucking comic ads. Holy shit. I'm working closely

with my editor. We had a great creative week, I feel. Yeah. And, yeah. Will you read these? You got any creative projects lined up? No. And, uh, yeah. Will you read these?

You got any creative projects lined up? No! Well, we should write something. Fuck no. Not after that treatment debacle. No fucking way. The treatment was not a debacle, okay? It was just whatever.

I just thought I could spruce it up, and, you know, you guys also could spruce it up. It's a collaborative exercise. Um, okay. I can read the super it up. It's a collaborative exercise. Okay. I can read the super chats. Yeah, read the super chats. Wow, Dick is just really plowing through here. Okay. Well, Koof for Two says, thank you all for not killing yourselves.

Thank you, Koof. Dumb Username for Two says, what's the best place to send super killer fan art? Twitter? Twitter's good. If they want to get on the website. Yeah, you to send super killer fan art. Twitter. Twitter's good. If they want to get on your website. Yeah, you can send it to me now. I now have access to update our great website. It's got some fun stuff on there.

Johnny Rocker for two. EVS' Cyberfrog got torn apart by Eric July. Did you see that video? Oh, is that the AI one? The AI Eric July. I saw a tiny bit of it. It's pretty good. I kind of want to get that AI Eric July voice.

It sounds exactly like him. Well, that's the thing, is his new video that he put out is even more monotone than the AI Eric July. And he edits the shit out of his videos, too, the short ones, so it sounds even more AI-y. Dude, he sounds not human at all. It's bizarre. Kix Mechanic for 20. Been watching since Destiny on the show, and I haven't missed an episode since.

Well, he's going to quit the show after this. That's it, yeah. After you keep coming down on this episode. That's it. This is not that bad an episode. My problems were not that bad. All the problems were bad. All the problems were bad and dumb.

They were bad. You have to help sell the problems. If you say they're dumb, people will think they're dumb. The car thing is good. No, people aren't stupid. They know when something is bad. You have to help sell the problems. If you say they're dumb, people will think they're dumb. The car thing is good. No, people aren't stupid. They know when something is bad. You must have a car story. Oh, yeah, I know what that is about.

Car story? Whatever. It says, even my 65-year-old super conservative old school mechanic mentor slash boss loves the show. Oh, that's great. Well, that is actually great. You guys are going to blow up. Keep grinding. Vito and Dick as a boss loves the show. Oh, that's great. Well, that is actually great. You guys are going to blow up, keep grinding. Vito and Dick as a team make the show 100% hand clap emoji.

There's no tricks in there? Oh, God, did I get fucked? I don't know. I can't believe I missed that one. I don't want that stupid niggler thing to play over me. Well, maybe they're going to get you. David Hodge for 10. Or Hodes.

My last name is pronounced how Eric July would say hold this. Hode. Hode. Hodes. Hodes. Got into a fight with a girlfriend over a horny cat. Still wouldn't unconsentify her. Vito, you are 2.1 tungsten cubes.

Guys, your cat is in distress. 2.1. Help that cat out. 314. I do not weigh 314. Influence history for two. Vito, can you do toy reviews on your second channel? I don't really like... What am I going to review? How do you review a toy? Why do you buy it? To look at it.

That's it? I bought those Cowboy Bebop figures. What am I going to say? Hey, this looks cool. I like to look at it but why i like colorful stuff i don't know man as a comic creator i like to take inspiration from colorful things around me you know i might draw from different elements of uh franchises i have personally enjoyed i have more of a reason to own toys than most people. Why's that? Because I was a graphic designer for like 10 years. Oh, okay.

It's all about shapes and colors and whatever else which has informed my design sensibilities over the years. Whatever. I'm not like a guy who buys pop figures. Every toy I bought is not like just The video games I buy are crap

But that's different because they're not toys And I just impulsively buy those like an idiot I would just love to see how much stuff you're buying Every toy I buy Has a purpose Except for the ones I win from that Japanese crane game That I need to stop playing Are you doing that what not thing

That wheel of consoles Yeah so I have decided I really want to sell on what not to stop playing. Are you doing that Whatnot thing? That wheel of consoles? Uh, yeah. So I have decided I really want to sell on Whatnot. I'm really committed to that idea. Okay. I'm going to turn my living room into a little set. And I'm going to go on there. This is going to be Vito's

fun time. You're going to be able to buy all sorts of stuff. What do you mean? I want to sell magic cards. Okay. I want to be one of those guys Pack openings And I'm going to be one of these guys Who opens a really good card And I take the pack out of the camera

And I go, it's just a basic land, sorry Oh man I'm going to rip everybody off I want to get a real wheel I want to get all sorts of shit You could get a wheel I would have a wheel. I would have a lot of fun with it.

So that's my hope. I want to get there. You're going to do it every day? If I make money from it, yeah. Dude, there's guys who are cleaning up on there. Yeah. Because I only go on at like 2 a.m. It's gambling.

Yeah. Right? Okay. Yeah. Well, magic cards have always been gambling. Sports cards. Pokemon cards. But like you're paying for what's in the pack.

It's like straight up gambling online where you're just clicking like, yeah, yeah, yeah, like a slot machine. You're buying a pack at a time. Buying a pack is fun because you're like, ah, maybe I'll get something good. Spin the wheel. It doesn't have to have a wheel. But it's still like a metaphorical wheel. There's a metaphor.

Every time you buy a pack of cards, it's like a slot machine. Some people get addicted. And I see guys, dude, some of this shit. Remember when I was showing you all those scam videos upstairs? Sometimes I'll be watching these streams and I'm like, how are these guys getting away with this? They're like, it's the mystery box. We got 100 mystery boxes and they're $200 each. I'm like, $200 fucking dollars.

And that guy buys one and it's just like fucking trash garbage in there. I don't know how they even allow that shit. I don't know. Honestly, like, I can't just go do roulette down the street. But you can go on Whatnot and just gamble on Magic Cards. Did you know that this is, like, hugely popular in China? Oh, shocker. Like, in China.

No, like, insanely so. Like, 50% of Chinese people are just logging into auction apps and buying, like they're buying like watermelons and like fish through fucking like online auctions now. It's insane. They're like, yeah, every person in China, they're just addicted to it. And I'm like, well, this seems like one of those things where if you get in early enough, you're

going to make a bunch of money. What, at gambling? Yeah! It's basically Look, I'm selling magic cards, which I like. I like magic cards. I like opening packs of magic cards. I'm giving Magic Cards, which I like. I like Magic Cards. I like opening packs of Magic Cards. I'm giving all my money to these people to open Magic Cards for me. The problem is, is you're going to be selling, you're going to be taking advantage of your fans. That's the problem with whatnot.

Because it's gambling, so it's bad for them. Well, if somebody like, I don't know, man. I don't know everybody's financial situation. I guess if a guy spends $1,000 on Magic Cards, they'll go, hey, man, just to make sure you're not bankrupting your family with this or whatever. You're cool, right? We're cool, right?

Yeah, okay. I mean, I like to think that. But you can only be successful by preying on people who have a gambling addiction. Well, I mean, it's like me. I have money to buy Magic Cards and stupid toys. Yes, do I spend more on it than I should Sure but you know I'm not

I got a roof over my head I could be Well honestly though I look at this This is my magic cards and shit are like my Alternative to gambling is like cause if I went to a Casino I'd just be like well I'm gonna hit eventually I'm gonna hit eventually At least here the most I can lose in a fucking

Night is like yeah yeah, exactly. Okay. Lose 20 bucks. And I go, okay, that wasn't a good hit. So I think this is a better alternative to most gambling. Because no matter what, you get something. Oh, that sounds like a gambler if I ever heard it. No matter what, I'm getting something.

You get something. And you're helping out small. They got free drinks here. And then when I get like a really shitty run, I go, well, at least I helped out this small business, so you can always justify it to yourself. Yeah. I'm obsessed with this app. It's a-

What are you going to call it? Vito's Casino? Vito's Casino. I was thinking about calling it Vito's Casino. They'll kick me off real quick. They'll go, listen, motherfucker, we are on the edge of legality as it is. Yeah, we're going to Vito's Crypto Casino, where lady luck can be your guide. Stop it.

Stop it. This is already like we don't want the FTC to even know we exist. Look, I got to get in before, again, the FTC shuts it all down, which I'm sure they will. Slarp for 200 Japanese. Jan, Vito should take up smoking to lose the weight. Trust me, I've thought about it. Steve for two says Truxme. Don't forget, guys, the Truxme shirt is now available.

But the XL is not there. I mean, come on. That's kind of a popular size, isn't it? Okay, look. Here's how it works. Okay? There is a fulfillment company That prints on demand

They're out of black XL shirts No one's blaming you, it just sucks Okay, well, here's what I'll do when I get home I'll put up like a heather gray shirt Which is close to black, it's not actually black Okay, so it won't be pitch black It'll be dark gray Then buy a white one or a yellow one.

I'm just saying it fucking sucks that right when we do all that stuff, it's like, oh, XL's out. Look, I thought it would be cleared up quicker. The hats are now available. Who do you use for printing? It's a site called Printful. They're very good. Oh, Printful. Yeah, all their

shirts are great. And you were all worried that the shirts are not going to be comfortable, and in every review of this brand of shirts, they're like the most comfortable shirt you can get. What's the brand? Not Gildan. What is it? Bella? Bella? They're fine. They're great. I wear like, because I

make shirts. I wasn't worried about the comfortability of shirts. What are you talking about? You were worried that the graphic's going to wear off or something? Well, it's print-on-demand. You can tell that it's print-on-demand. I can't tell. I don't know the fucking difference. You can tell because you make shirts.

Most people do not manufacture and screen print shirts. Nobody knows. I have a bunch of these shirts because I make my own shirts, and I love them. And they're all great, okay? What am I wearing right now? This is not one of them. Yeah, it looks great. It attracts me.

As long as you're not extra large. Get an XL in yellow or white and I can also add other colors if anyone specifically wants like a green one. What else have they sold out of? Let's find all those. Oh my God, I can't do...

Everything has to have a problem. It's not your fault. It's just Printful. Sure. Printify routes your order to somebody else. I could put up black shirts of a different... No, I think it would fuck it up.

I would have to make a separate category. How about I put up black hoodies while we wait for the XL shirts? Nah, it's too expensive. Yeah, you're right. It's just a joke. On the John for two says Richard. Kyle Baxter for two. This intro sounds like a shitty WWF walkout theme.

I like the old intro music. I mean, the new intro music is good, but I was a big fan of the... That guy made... Your man Martian made that whole thing. I'll listen to it again. I'll listen to it again. I'll listen to it again. Maybe I'll learn to love it. Oh, my God.

I had lyrics to the previous one in my head. What were your lyrics? I can't remember. I'd have to hear the song. Do, do, do. And there's something like, it's the biggest show, the show that you know. It's fine. It's good.

I love it. I love the new intro theme. On the John, for two says do, then for another two he says you. Riley Edwards for two says weigh in. I want to know if you weigh more than Lizzo. How much does she weigh? A lot. I do not weigh more than Lizzo.

Okay, let's see about that. I do not weigh more than Lizzo. She weighs like 400 pounds. Well. Although she's like five foot something, so maybe she doesn't. How much does Lizzo weigh? They're not going to tell you that online. How would they know?

What do you mean? Because she's like fat and I love being fat. So she says how fat she is? At the start of her weight loss journey, Lizzo weighed 308 pounds. She's like five foot six. That doesn't count. But at first you said. It's a different scale, okay?

Oh, wow. Now she lost 60 pounds, she says. Okay. Wow, man. That was how much weight you said you were going to lose. Fine. Liz, that's kicking my ass. I don't care. She shredded 40 pounds. Wow.

That's her prerogative They have an x-ray of a fat woman On there too that I'm seeing 260 Congratulations Lizzo you're doing great And I look forward to joining you very soon As I continue my weight loss journey Red for two says

Eric July is a chicken and is distant from intelligence I agree I would think Vegas for two says crosswords and croissants. Yeah. On the John for two is continuing his do you with eat. Do you eat? Pigfeeler for 10 says finally catching it live, my favorite show. Biggest problem with prick flaccid soon.

And Fido, he's balding. Shut up. I'll pop and Fido He's Balding. I'll pop some popcorn. Damien for 50 big pounds. Pounds? No wait, is it more or less? More.

I saw this in a comment on the last episode. For every six weigh-ins that the Fat Fuck loses weight, you do a live show. Vito can sell his shitty hand-drawn t-shirts while also eventually fitting in one. Thanks for all the laughs. Six weigh-ins. That's every six weeks? I don't want to do a show every six weeks.

That's a lot. That's a lot. Well, thank you regardless for the 50 euros. Thank you. On the John, do you eat butthole? And as we know from the sound clip, you do. Excuse me. Mick Quiz knows for four, I'm playing Halo drunk, listening to Biggest Problem, and the

woman is not bothering me. That's good. Life is good. Women tend to not like my voice if you play my shows around. They'll just leave. Meanwhile, women are drawn to my sultry tones. I believe you.

I don't know what vocal range would you call it. My baritone? A little higher than that. Well, your radio voice is really high. It's really high. I don't know what you are. Isn't everyone a soprano around there?

Everyone is a soprano. Are they? I don't know what you are. Probably, isn't everyone a soprano? Like, around there? Everyone is a soprano. Are they? I don't know. I have no idea. Scar for 10. You guys have been killing it as of late, except for Vito, who won't get on the scale. I'm about to reach 10K on the Fat Girl Anthem, and I'm very happy about it. Must be how Vito feels after his fourth meal.

What's 10K on the Fat Girl Anthem? I'm going to assume that this was some sort of mistake. 10,000 pounds of women? Is that like a pedometer? 10,000 steps or something? Yeah, I'm about to reach 10K on the Fat Girl Anthem. Again, I think this might be a text-to-speech error. I don't know.

On the John 5, you've left the sunglasses on Vito for 30 minutes. Don't think I didn't notice. See, that's why we need a second monitor. Hayaski for five euros. First time catching the show live. It's four in the morning here, so get on the scale, fatty boom baddy. Hail Satan and Kanye wearing a Burzum merch. What's that?

I don't know. Burzum, Burzum. I've heard that. Some sort of joke. Charles Baker for five. Is Eric July going to San Diego Comic-Con? If so, have you thought of organizing a Q&A raid like how Fuentes did it to Charlie Kirk back in the day? He will be at...

He announced that they're doing a Rip-A-Verse panel at a certain comic convention. Oh, really? Yes. And I am not encouraging our audience to go there and create content whatsoever. But you are by saying that. Don't do it. You're directly encouraging them. No, I don't.

No, I do not approve of that. What are you telling them not to say? I don't know. What should they not do? What's the top three things? When I heard he was going to be at it, I went, somebody's going to fuck something up and it's going to be my problem again. Speaking of which, Obtuse Gnome is back on Twitter.

Remember when you said you'd give Eric whatever info on Obtuse Gnome? Yeah, and then he fucked me, so I didn't give him anything. And I wasn't going to throw that guy under the bus anyway. Look. What should they not do? Fans of the show? Yeah. At the Comic-Con.

If you had to list definitely one thing. I haven't thought about it. God, what should they not do to Eric July? Well, not to him, you know. Or in general. Or around him. I think just go, be respectful. Oh.

Ask a nice, at the Q&A, whatever questions you might have. Don't go pretend to be the writer of ISOM. And host a panel, a Q&A. Don't go dressed as a super killer And say hi and see how he reacts I don't know you guys Look I think it's I want to say Montreal comic It's something with an M

It's definitely not Montreal What's another M place Missouri Yeah maybe it's Missouri You guys figure it out Tony for five you can't give Vito a screen He'll obsessively watch the chat and have less energy Shut up

Yeah I have to hide the screens from everybody when I do my show because they just sit there and read them. I think it's fun to interact. Mr. Abstruse for 10, please read in caveman voice so that idiot Crimsel can understand. You go work, Crimsel. Crimsel, you go get job. You work now.

Crimsel, find job. Crimsel, go do get job. You work now. Crimsel, find job. Crimsel, go do job. Living with mom bad. Crimsel, work. There you go. Get a job, Crimsel. Get a job. Get a job.

James Gardner here for a big $20 on the board. Wow, thank you. Thank you, James. Thanks to Nina Infinity and Mushmouth for creating fun. Bunnies in the tunnels. Chickens. Chickens now are, that's where it's at. Chickens are the hot, hot, hot.

Did you think when you reviewed the comic that like, we, the indie, I've been thinking about it, I'm like, honestly, what you did is one of the best things that has ever happened to comic books in the modern age. Yeah, I know. That's why I did it. You've saved... I did it on purpose.

But for more reasons than I think you understand. No, I did it to trigger Eric into melting down so everyone would see him as a huge fucking fraud. That's helpful, too. But you're also, just like people are now who don't care about comic books at all, are going, well, these guys are all arguing about it. What is...

Are comic books a thing still? And then they're looking at you and they go, all going, well, these guys are all arguing about it. What is this? Are comic books a thing still? And then they're looking at you and they go, all right, you know what? I got to see. Maybe I'll buy this fucking Cyberfrog comic or whatever else. Yeah, it's good. We've created a new market. And if you're making comic books, you have to do a better job with your story. Yeah.

Stop rushing it and throw away lines and stuff that you like because it's not good. Not only are we encouraging people to do a better job making comics, but I think people are being like, remember when Image first showed up? Well, you have all these shitbag YouTubers. Yeah. Like, Eric's whole plan was obviously from the get-go to sell vanity, 3D art, shitty comic books made by this Brazilian chop shop to YouTubers and go through them one by one. Yellow Flash was like his bitch first

demo run. Let's make you a vanity project and then we're going to sell it through my warehouse and my shop and I'm like, I'm going to be like the kingpin of shitty YouTuber comics. And then after you it's going to be Nerd Roddick, Heel vs. Babyface all these fucking retards

that are like a constant embarrassment pretending to know jack shit about media crying about pronouns like that was his business which required the destruction of crowdfunding because crowdfunding connects people with shit they support instead of this

just woke conglomerate yeah uh run by uh trans kids uh me too feminists and eric july an illiterate a functional illiterate so destroying the fucking red line was crucial to this business taking off i hopefully it won't well Well, I wonder what... Hopefully no one buys Yellow Flash's dog shit comic. I don't know. What happens in the universe

where we're just not here to call bullshit on this obvious emperor has no clothes situation? He just gets away with it. Well, that's what I'm saying. If you hadn't have said anything and if I hadn't have said anything,

I'm going to take partial credit. Yeah. Eric Gillespie would probably be making extra millions of dollars. It'd be amazing. People can't even wait for Icon 3. And they would all be reading these shitty comics and having to tell themselves, yeah, but it's pretty good. I have some problems with it, but it's pretty good. But it's dead now because somebody just said, no, that motherfucker can't write.

Now everybody goes, oh. And Dean Cain has a comic book coming out? Who the fuck cares? Dean Cain has a comic book coming out being made by Eric's colorist. So they're all part of this incestuous bullshit fucking circle. Jacking each other off. Hey, what's your comic book about? What's your fucking comic book about?

You were the Chinese Superman, right? Does everyone know that? But I am excited. It seems like more people are learning about comics from the drama. They're checking them out. And I urge you guys to support your favorite creators, whoever they might be. I urge you to anti-support people you don't like. Attack their fans.

Make fun of their fans and make them feel bad. And stupid. And small. I do wonder how Yellow Flash... I think Yellow Flash will probably be able to raise like a million bucks just because his audience is stupid. His audience is probably about the same size as Eric's. Yeah, but he's not

black. Well, that's what I'm saying. Eric got like four million. I think Yellow Flash... There's one Eminem. Dr. what I'm saying. Eric, you know, got like four million. I think Yellow Flesh. Well, there's one Eminem. Yeah. Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, you know? That's what white people, that's how white people think. But I've heard Yellow Flesh talk, and I go, there's no way this guy could write anything. That's the thing with some of these guys.

I'm like, they're so stupid. Like, I just cannot picture them writing, you know? Yeah. That's why I always said, I'm like, I can't picture Eric July writing a script because he goes on Twitter, he goes, I'm going Scotch Earth on all you motherfuckers. And's why I always said, I'm like, I can't picture Eric July writing a script because he goes on Twitter. He goes, I'm going Scotch earth on all you motherfuckers. And I go, how did you write a script? How is that possible?

There's no way. We'll find out someday. Utah based Armenian for two. Plug my new play Fiddler in the sewer. I love, I want more Jews. Did they ever shut down the tunnels Or are they still there Nah they shut them down

They welded them shut That's bullshit Laid steel for five Remember Block Lofty Pixels I heard lofty the other day On some show

And I went I really do Cannot listen to this motherfucker Coup for five Is a professional anime connoisseur Eric throwing manga on their bus Really struck a nerve Go fuck yourself Eric

No thank you for not killing yourself For you He's attacking everybody Don't attack anybody Just stop that Professional anime connoisseur Eric throwing manga on their bus really struck a nerve. Go fuck yourself, Eric. No, thank you for not killing yourself for you. He's attacking everybody. Don't attack anybody. Just stop that. Slurp for 200 Japanese yen. Live in Japan. The Costco here also has too many Asians.

I believe you. I was looking at Costco stock, and I'm like, shit, I should have bought more of that. Did you see the video everybody posted in response to my problem of Chinese people lined around the block for Costco? A day, yeah. Should have brought in that fucking video. Two days they lined up for Costco. And you go, I don't think it's a real problem. And like, Asians love it.

They love it more than anything in their fucking life. I was thinking that I should go to Costco, too. I was thinking I should buy. I should go to Costco. Well, I have a card if you want to go to Costco. I think she does, too. I was like, I want to buy Costco stock. And then I looked, and it's already skyrocketed. I'm like, if I had only gotten in before the Chinese did.

It's about a returnal for five. A skinny Vito would fit between Costco Asians. Did you know Fat Brain is banned from Super Chats? I didn't do that. The fats are taking over. Get on the scale, Vito. Wait, what? Fat Brain is banned?

How is Fat Brain banned? How is Fat not banned? No way. You typed it in. I don't know how that would be banned. You typed it in wrong. That's weird. Do4year for 10. Vito, if you step on the scale, you'll be like Maximus in the Coliseum. The crowd's screaming. You'll pass away from 10 minutes of standing.

Wow. Koofer2. G Prime hates AI, but tracing 3D is okay. Amazing. It's the fucking lying and the gaslighting that these guys are doing that drives me fucking insane. Yeah. Like, the attitude is like, huh. So people are like, people are like pretending to be surprised that using a reference to draw? Ladies and gentlemen, I just stepped down from heaven.

Let me tell you something. As an accomplished artist, I can tell you that drawing from what you see in your mind is basically art. That's not what we're saying, you pretentious fuck. You condescending fucking moron. It's rendered. It's rendered. It has the polygon lines left in. It's rendered from a fucking minimum wage chop shop promoted by a retard who lied about it, told everybody they were lying about it.

They did lie about it. Then admitted about lying about it. He did lie about it. Then admitted about lying about it and then said it's fine. And then threw the artist under the bus. He said it's fine, but also it's not fine. Also, I wish Cliff Richards hadn't have done it so much. Well, then why didn't you stop it when he did it? Exactly how much would you have wished? It's this fucking pretentious attitude That famous people have

Where they think their audience is stupid And as soon as they start telling their audience is stupid It starts eroding away from under them Like what are you What's happening to me Why is all my support eroding away Yeah I mean there's people in the comments of the video he put up

That are like Well yeah but it is shitty that your comic has a bunch of 3D renders in it That doesn't seem like art It's not yeah I don't think you watched the video and understood what I was trying to get at You clearly didn't watch the video Like, well, yeah, but it is shitty that your comic has a bunch of 3D renders in it. That doesn't seem like art. It's not, yeah. I don't think you watched the video and understood what I was trying to get at. You clearly didn't watch the video. Did you see the comment where somebody was like, well, wait, are your employees doing 3D renders without your knowledge?

And his answer was, they're not my employees. They're my contractors. It's like, well, that doesn't answer the question. Okay, bro. Are either of them? Somebody pointed out, like, that man will never just answer a question. He will find any. I mean, we knew this.

He'll find any pedantic thing to go, what do you mean I said it? Yeah, yeah. He's like, well, you said this. He's like, I've typed it. Oh, I've typed that. I never said it. And you're like, cocksucker, you know what I mean. Just answer the fucking question.

Well, see, Mr. Nick McCade, I never said I was going to sue them. You know I would not be so presacious as to... I fucking hate e-celebs so much. I hate celebrities, but I hate e-celebs even more. They're so much more craven and submissive

and obsequious than real celebrities because they're competing for an even smaller amount of money. Like, at least real celebrities get fame and, like... Relax a little bit. They can relax a little bit. They can sometimes do, you know, make some good art by accident, right? E-celebrities, ugh. They're fighting over the same couple bucks.

Never wanted to be one. I fucking hate them so much. What was I going to say? Yeah, it's it's and also these guys who don't understand that yes they've been successful but they're at the lowest tier of success and that's not the time to start grandstanding like kanye like you're a once in a lifetime irreplaceable talent and i'm like you can't do the kanye thing yet like you sold one comic book you can never do it you you you are not the comic book You can never do it You are not the Kanye here Yellow Flash where's your artist money

Where's his money He lives in a dumpster behind his burnt down house With his fucking family Cut him off a check for 10 grand today Where's the check Your brother told you to your face you don't know how to draw Just accept that that's fine Stop pretending otherwise

Yellow Flash where's the. Where's the money? Where's the fucking money? Where's the money? Where's your artist's money? Where's the money? Well, people don't understand about that situation. They're like, well, he agreed to the terms. If your artist can't buy... Give him some fucking money!

I don't care what the deal is! Give him some goddamn money! You cheap, fat piece of shit. Just go, hey, I noticed your house flooded and your kids don't have Christmas presents. Send him money. Why don't I give you a big old advance? He has the money. Yeah, all this shit is crazy.

Dave for five. I'm not on Twitter, but I would still like to block Lofty Pixels. Any ideas? Make an account. Block him. Get somebody else to block him. We'll to block Lofty Pixels. Any ideas? Make an account. Block them. Get somebody else to block them. Well, find Lofty Pixels mailing address. You can send him a card that just says blocked.

There you go. Who cares for 20 Australian? Good to see you. Have energy, Vito. Maybe use some of that to get up and onto a scale. Okay. Stray beans for eight AUDs. Is that Australian dollars? Is Eric Jolli's Be Great catchphrase just a clever smoke screen To disguise his entire career as a hate monger

That whines about queer people? Yes That's a big part of it Joe Cool for big ten dollars This show should link up with Danny Mullen and his guys Similar audiences And they run their own stand-up comedy show in North Hollywood For Vito to try out new jokes

He's also a new UCB guy Why do I know of Danny Mullen? Why do I know that name? I don't know. Every time the internet comes up, some fucking person has like, oh, you should connect with Danny Mullen. I'm like, alright. Tell him to connect with us.

I don't know how to connect with anybody. I'm an idiot. Does he play magic cards? I could connect with him on that. I don't even know. I couldn't identify him if I saw him, what he looked like. He has a comedy show in North Hollywood. Well, maybe we'll go do stand-up. Danny Mullen show.

Why are you saying that like that? Because I'm going to go there to ruin it. My stand-up is not bad. It's fine, okay? I'm pretty good at stand-up, I think. No, you don't do stand-up. I've done stand-up. I don't do stand-up. I've done stand-up. I don't do stand-up.

I've done it at least 20 times. Yeah. That's more than most people. Yeah, but that doesn't mean it's like... I'm not saying it's my thing. I never said that. I just said I like the idea of it. Yeah, that's good.

I think I could be good at stand-up. You gotta really commit to it. And the problem is, you know... You didn't. I'm so committed. I think I could be good at stand-up. You got to really commit to it. And the problem is, you know. You didn't. I'm so committed. I'm committed to other things. Why are you so offended by that? You didn't commit to stand-up.

You're not a stand-up. That's not a big deal. You're right. I'm not a stand-up. I'm not saying I'm a stand-up. All I've said is I would like to do more stand-up because it's fun. Oh, yeah. You should.

Maybe I could host a show, you know. Because the host doesn't really have to do very much except just introduce the comics and have fun. What do you want, though? Do you want to be a host of a thing, or do you want to do stand-up comedy? Like, what do you like? Because those are different things.

I just want to get out of the house and meet other funny people and maybe find people you know could collaborate with or bring on the show or whatever else oh yeah i know it's la most of the comedians are fucking terrible most comedians are terrible uh yeah i know there's a lot of really bad comedy these days i don't know what happened well people aren't funny and they want attention i know but like they think they can pretend to be funny was comedy used to be better or is it just like I've gotten older and things aren't as funny as they used to be? Rodney Dangerfield revolutionized comedy by saying...

My wife's a fat bitch. My wife says I'm so ugly. Yeah. And people would say, well, how ugly is she? Because before that, it was just the joke with no anticipation at all. That's how unfunny people are. That was a big moment, and then it was recent. Yeah.

The call and response is pretty good. I'm also interested, though, that stand-up has kind of remained antiquated. Why are guys not going on stage with, I don't know, VR helmets and electronic doodads? Like Carrot Top? No, stage with, like, I don't know, VR helmets and electronic doodads? VR helmets? What are you, like, Carrot Top? No, but I feel like, you know, I don't know. Like, I saw one comedian, you know, he went up, he had, like, a PowerPoint or whatever.

It was funny. Like, we went to that show where that guy pretended to be a suicide, or whatever, they had a suicide bomb. Yeah, that's funny, yeah. I'm like, oh, man, that's, like, really a memorable bit. I'll never forget that bit. That's, like, UCB level shit, though. Well, that's what you a memorable bit. I'll never forget that bit. That's like UCB level shit, though. Well, that's what you used to do.

Yeah. Before, you know, they kicked you out for being a rapist. Yeah. Probably for my benefit, though. Probably for your benefit. That's what you keep telling yourself. LJ, Claberino for five. If you're forced to give up one, drugs or alcohol, which will you pick?

Drugs. Really? Yeah. I can't live without alcohol. Yeah, I guess that's right. I like alcohol. I lived for a long time without drugs. Alcohol is very tasty.

Tony for five. Not from Hack the Movies. Regular Tony. I'm a fan of the sound effects lately that more... Wait. I'm a fan of the sound effects lately that more than Maddox could have made in three years. More than Maddox could have made. Well years. More than Maddox could have made. Well, that does not make sense.

Thank you. Good try. Thank you. We have Riley here for a big $100. Wow. Wow. Whoa. For canon's sake.live, guys.

You got to go to forcanonsake.live. This is great. Canon with one N at the end. I turned it on. Riley was, he had no shirt on. I mean, he looked like a, I don't even know how to describe. Riley's a madman. He's a go-getter.

He's out there. He's pushing it to the limit. First of all, he's wearing all white morph suit with glasses, like Rorschach, which was hilarious. Yeah. And then in the next scene, he came in on on Mint who's dressed like Yairo and he started punching her in the tits. Like over and over. And I said this is one of

the most amazing things I've ever seen. Not because of the tits, just the whole thing. And he has so much hair coming off him like a wolf man. Riley, you gotta pull clips from the show and post them as like a little five minute thing so people can learn what the show's about. I think they would enjoy that. Would that teach you what that show was about?

If there was a clip I could watch right now of Riley in a Rorschach mask punching mint salad's tits, I would watch that clip. Well, I just don't know if you can do that. It would not be as good as matching the live energy, but I'd like to see that. Regardless, guys, for canon's sake

dot live, best show of all shows. Pull up for the most obsessive rewatch of Eric Jalai's podcast on the internet. There you go. It's really great. Get all the Eric Jalai lore from ForCanonSake.Live. KFM for five. You guys are watching Fish Tank. Alex Stone did his show from there yesterday.

Did you see Roger Stone was a... I saw a shot of that. That was funny. I was like, fuck, if they got Roger Stone on Fish Tank, that would actually be pretty good. There's no way they know who that guy was, though. Why is that guy... All these autistic kids having no idea who fucking Roger Stone is would be

pretty funny. And he's so weird. He's so weird. He kept showing me his Reagan tattoo or whatever the fuck. James Gardner for $10. I agree with Riley. Lovely weirdos that show how Buster Blackster scorched the earth. Scotched.

But if that's wrong, it's Scotched the earth. Scotched the earth. Panic pun for 10. People complaining about Power World is insane, saying everything is copyright. I think he means Pal World, the game I was talking about. Where were these people when Digimon created a rabbit with machine guns for Hansel? Thank you, Panic Pun, who agrees with me.

Kelmas for 20. Here's my super chat cherry. Breaking the cherry tonight. You better be over 18 with that. Let's hope so. Metaphor. Pitch for 10. Forgive the boomerism, but childhood mortality rates appear to not be high enough.

Sorry, there was a two and a B, so I started getting worried. Not B. Yeah, no, we're fine. Sarah Gardner for five. Vito is so lazy. Oh, come on. Can't even get out of bed to stream. Portly of frame and plump of fetlock.

The model of a human body in perfect working order. I mean, you're streaming from bed, man. It's comfortable. That's where bed, man. It's comfortable. That's where my TV is. It's in front of the bed. Why not? Yeah. What?

You don't watch movies in bed? I don't stream it. Well, this is me. I'm playing games. As long as I'm playing games and I enjoy talking to the chat and whatever else, I might as well stream it. It's fun. No one's debating that you're having fun.

I want to have fun. This is fun. Riley Edwards for two. The biggest problem is Vito's artist. I disagree. Utah-based Armenian for two. Vito is a rip-off of Subway Charity. Koo for five. IceM3 should take the 3D models from Pokemon instead of SketchUp. That would be good.

TBF for five. A ton of stuff in Lord of the Rings was based on hollow earth stuff. Anyway, stop buying plastic garbage, Vito. Is that true? That's probably true. That's probably true. Cozier Lobster for 20. Vito, did you know you are sitting next to someone who likes to eat ass?

No. No. Riley Edwards for two. Too many Asian drivers. Christian Hollingsworth for 20. Busted gutters, clogged storm drain, and a derivative shit pit of my own. Home repairs for the win. Yeah. You got one guy on your

side. Glow warmization for five. The dev for Pow World. Crap out. Lazy asset store EA trash. The same as Eric's lie, but Vito defends it. Look, I haven't played it yet, but I don't know, man. The argument that it looks too much like Pokemon is a bad argument.

Why? Well, if you listened to my problem. It just looks like shit, though. Where I elaborated on why. It does not look like shit. It looks good. It looks like a copy. Why not copy something that looks good?

I don't understand. You should copy good looking stuff. The problem with Eric's lie is he copies shitty looking stuff, like fucking 3D models he ripped off of SketchUp, okay? Why not copy something that looks good? I don't understand. You should copy good-looking stuff. The problem with Eric Gly is he copies shitty-looking stuff, like fucking 3D models he ripped off of SketchUp, okay? If you had copied something cool, we'd have much less of a problem with it. Colin for 10.

Love you, Vito. But, man, you're missing out on the indie comic craze right now with Super Killer. Ethan VanSkyber is everywhere right now making comics big. Oh, yeah. Imagine if Super Killer was out right now. Oh, shit. It if Super Killer was out right now. Oh, shit. It'd be getting huge play. Oh, I didn't even think of that.

It's fine. It's going to come out, and it's going to be like, everyone's going to be done talking about this and sick of comics. Oh, that's brutal. I feel for you. Look, now that I think about it, yes, right now would be a perfect window to have a brand new comic book And stick it to Eric Goliath, okay?

But sometimes life does not work out exactly Timing, you know, you can't always plan ahead that well, okay? Oh, that sucks It might still be going on Well, here Nah Oh, okay Every time we say the Eric Goliath thing is over, it keeps going

So we'll see No, it's peaked Ethan Van Cyver making all this money and just fucking totally ass fucking in. And then once my comic comes out, there'll be enough residual leftover goodwill. Okay. I'll take it on all the shows. I'll take it on Ethan's show and I'll go, hey, well, here's what I got. Yeah.

Whatever, man. My life sucks anyway. Okay. Could have been great though. This has been pretty good It's better than nothing I'm happy we got it funded It's getting made

Shouldn't you put him killing Isom in it somewhere? To get some clicks? You know Andy Signore every week You're putting Isom in the comic No I don't I don't want to put Isom in it That's too obvious. Andy's ignoring.

No, right? Maybe I'll put ice on him. You've got to put him in a little bit. I don't know. I've got to think of a place to put him. Or just like a flashback in one of his old, when he's explaining what he does. Flashback. Boom.

So you have thought of it. I've thought of it. But you wanted to be Tegrity. So you wanted to be your own separate thing away from Isam, right? Part of it is I don't want to force my artist to get involved in this shit war. I don't believe that you're benevolent about this. I am very benevolent about this. I had floated the idea of putting, you know, that table in his living room?

Yeah. Just putting the table in, like, a background. Not as funny. Okay, sure. Killing Isom. That's what I'm talking about. There's not really a place to, like, organically. I can't wait to see you talk your way out of this one for three months. There's no really a place to like organically

talk your way out of this one. There's no place to organically work it in, you know? There's not a lot of flashbacks. What do you do? I kill superheroes. The thought bubble of like, boom, I saw him dead. In his truck. He's just sitting in his truck, head blown off. Isn't that a little like, you know, on the nose?

Like a pie in the face, right? That's so dumb. Who would want to see that? Everybody keeps saying they're like, well, why don't you put him kneeling on Ison's neck on the cover? That's too much. Maybe that's why I'm worried.

Then I'm playing into that and they go, well, why is he fighting Ison? I wonder if he's fought Ison in any previous situations. So if he goes into a black guy universe, he's like, I can't. I'm playing into that and they go, why is he fighting Isom? I wonder if he's fought Isom in any previous situations. So if he goes into a black guy universe, he's like, I can't. I'm freaking out. Honestly, that would probably be. I'm not touching this shit. I want nothing to do with this.

Stratergery for 10. You'll never get a super chat from me. Thank you, sir. Thanks, Stratergery. Ryle Edwards for two. These problems are bad. Weigh it in to make it up. JJ for $20

The biggest problem in the universe is slavery Imagine someone losing their home Trapped in a portable shack Slaving away for hours without pay Someday maybe earning your freedom with a vague hope Of perhaps doing Dome compensation Slavery

Shameful That's what Eric July and Yellow Flash are doing Poor artists Slavery. Shameful. That's what Eric July and Yellow Flash are doing. They're poor artists. Slavery. Slavery. Pig feeler for five. And they're fucking up the comic. Yeah.

Because now everyone's going in on. Well, Ethan made a very good point. It's the same point I had in my head, which is like, Eric, don't tell your audience that. All this Twitter beef of everyone being like, hey, you use 3D assets for your comic. Just handle that on Twitter. Don't go on YouTube and go, everybody's attacking me because my comic's full of 3D assets. And a lot of people watching, they go, wait, hold on a second. What?

Did you just say 3D assets? I didn't know that. So everyone's calling me a pedophile. But the thing that you got to remember is buffering. That's a very good point. Because I've had people honestly go, I don't know why you don't just make a YouTube video where you address everyone calling you a pedophile. I'm like, what are you,

fucking retarded? My YouTube audience was like, Would you put the fucking graphic in front of it? I like this fat guy. He talks about movies. Guys, some of you may have heard that I'm a pedophile. I really want to talk about that. No, I of you may have heard that I'm a pedophile. I really want to talk about that. No, I'm not going to make that video, you fucking...

I won't tell you who told me to make that video, but I went, cool, that's a good idea. Is it someone I know? Someone who's been on the show, I'll tell you that. Is it Destiny? A former guest. No, it wasn't Destiny. Is it Eric? Don't worry about it.

Is it Winston? Stop guessing. I'm just saying. They said that. I went, thanks for the advice. I'll really take that into consideration. Is it Bow Blacks? Sure.

It's Bow Blacks. I knew it. Let's say it's Bow Blacks. It was not Bow Blacks, actually. No, because the first thing he said is, why do you always talk about pedophile shit? Bow Blacks is a very good guess. I'll say that, because that is something he would say. That was my...

I wanted to get a control answer from you. That's like an autistic response. It's like, well, just make a video about it. Yeah. That is something he would say, but it was not him. A verse for $200 says, scale question mark. $200? Yeah.

Whoa! Thanks for the $200. Scale, you're not even going to fucking do that. LJ Claberino for five. Verse, I want to thank you for the $200. Praise by it, not even considering it. Thank you very much for supporting. First, I want to thank you for the $200. Praise by it. Not even considering it. Thank you very much for supporting this comedy podcast.

If I got $200 to do a breathalyzer, you know how fast I would do it? It's different. It's not different. It's an addiction that you think you have control over. I don't think I have control over my alcoholism. People buy breathalyzers and bring them to parties. Everyone goes, oh, I'm so drunk. It's fun. People like a drunk, okay, I'm so drunk. It's fun.

People like a drunk. Okay? A fat guy. It's not fun. Everyone goes, people do not like a drunk. Let me clue you in on something. They really don't. Okay.

I think the depressing misery of the state of my body. People like a pizza party, too. It's not helpful to the show. I think it brings the... Every time I missed the weigh-in, it wasn't like a fun party too it's not helpful to the show i think it brings the every time i missed the weigh-in it wasn't like a fun part of the show it was literally the most fun thing ever people would be like wow i just i can't keep watching this show it's really but you don't do it and you give up money for not doing it that's all that matters that's the reason that you're

getting this because you won't you leave money on table, and you're like the most money-grabbing person ever. And you leave this scale money on the table. That's the fascinating part. I just think it's... I have thoughts, okay? That's it. I have thoughts on... I think it brings the show down.

Because if I'm fat, then everyone's disappointed. Everyone knows you're fat. Then why do they need me to weigh myself? Because you won't. Because you fucking won't. And that's a, that just assume, just assume that it went badly.

Do you not understand how all of this is related to like very personal demons that come out in behavior and actions? Like, why is it, why is it funny that Eric July rendered a 3D comic? Why is it funny? It's just some cheap shit comic. He made seven million bucks.

Why is it so funny? I don't know. Because it's his fucking brain. It's the way he deals with this shit. Okay. So it's that... Look, I get what you're saying. I get it.

You don't. No, I do. I get it. Okay. My resistance to it is what makes it so interesting and what makes me want to continue to egg it on and send me messages all the time and shame me for not doing it. I understand that. Okay.

Okay. But I'm still not going to do it, so fuck you. Then you don't get it. What do you mean I don't get it? Why will you not do it then? I just don't see the value in it. If someone said to Eric, don't make a YouTube video, he's like, I get what you're saying. I understand that I'm going to...

Okay, but now if I do it, it's not going to be interesting. Now it's like stupid. Why won't it be interesting? Because then I'll just have accepted it and then it's just like... And it'll just go away. It'll just go away, yeah. What you say that you want will happen

if you do it no because then they're gonna want to do it again so then you don't even believe that it will stop there's no way to make this work okay in my head if there is get on the scale and lose some fucking weight that's all they want

is you to lose weight they want you to lose weight I have to lose weight, sure. Either you are, everyone has someone in their life that will not do something that will help them. And you are now an embodiment of that. So either they'll punish you for not doing it, like they wish they could punish the person in their life,

or they'll reward you for doing it. But either way, I get punished because unless I've lost... The only way to not get punished is for me to lose weight. Right? Correct. Okay. Which you should want to do. And I do want to do.

How much? A good amount. All right? I'm dealing. Look, I'm not going to make any excuses. I have fucked up. Okay? No one says you've fucked up.

No. I know. Everybody wants me to be way. I should have lost way more weight Why do you think they want that though? Because they want me, they like me I get it They enjoy the show

They enjoy the comedy They don't want me to be a big fat sack of shit I get it They don't want you dating GameStop girls It's like watching Artie Lang die of heroin You're like, oh Artie, stop doing all that heroin I get it, it's you know it's like they don't want you dating game stuff it's like watching arty lang die of heroin and you're like oh arty stop doing all that heroin like i get it it's a radio thing you don't want the big fat fun guy on the radio to die of heroin or overeating okay i get it but but i have been i'm a fuck up okay that's it all right i'm a fuck-up. Okay, that's it. All right? It sounds like Artie. I'm a fuck-up, loser, piece of shit, fat moron.

And it's not going to stop. 200 bucks. That's not changing anything. What does that change? It doesn't change anything. All you have to do is walk over there. That doesn't change the actual problem. The problem is not that I'm not getting on the scale.

The problem is that I'm not losing the weight. Okay? You cannot carry me over there. I dare you to try and carry me over there. I think I could. Eh, maybe. If I could carry you over there, will you get on? No, we're not doing that bit.

Oh, my God. I literally can't fucking pick you up. I don't want to be carried. Look. Everybody wants to be carried. The core of the problem is not that I won't want to be myself. The core of the problem is that I won't stop eating like a fucking garbage dump lives inside my tummy. That's the problem.

Okay? It's got nothing to do with inside my tummy. That's the problem. Okay? It's got nothing to do with the scale or the fans or the show. It's me being a fuck-up, and I'm trying to address it. What do you mean? Okay? How are you trying to address it? I was working out this week. I got, again, I cleaned up the area, so I have a workout area. Okay.

You cleaned up the whole town? No, I cleaned up my area. Josie Wales? Yeah, I cleaned up the town. Okay. I am, look, let's pretend I'm already lying, okay? I'm trying to get off the stuff. All right, do some heroin. I'm trying to get off the junk. You don't need to measure how much heroin is in my bag. You literally do. Yes, yes you do. Yes, you absolutely do. I will manage my own heroin.

And that's the bottom line. And if somebody sends another... How's everybody doing? And if someone sends another $200, I will get on the scale. LJ Claberino for five. If you guys starred in your own Black Mirror episode, what would it be about and how would it end? Stupid question. Riley Edwards for two. Scale.

Rydog for five. Not everybody knows how to do everything. Driving isn't the only thing. That's a good quote. Good one. Butts Grenois for five. Please use this money to get a circus weight guesser on payroll. Maybe also a writer for Vito's problems.

I think you're 308. I'm not 308. Maxwell 21 for $17. Vito, it's your boy prime. I've heard theater kids say make my D wet because it's wacky slash wrong. I'm not defending Maddox because he manages to be even less funny than they are. Yeah, he might have heard that and then thought that they were being like real. Wait.

Because he's not doing it to like real Wait Did somebody say make money Maddox said that money doesn't make my dick wet In his live Q&A Because the last thing I said to Dick was Money doesn't make my dick wet So he's saying that he got that from the theater kids Maybe Yeah maybe he heard them doing it like to be funny

There you go Dean Shock for five Please Dick Vito has zero format instincts. Now, what are you talking about? Voted Up is a very popular segment. Yeah, Voted Up's great. Come on. Voted Up is great. Thank you. He's always terrible in that

regard. Always 100% right to wait until after EVS. Oh, yeah. I didn't even argue that point. I said we could do that and you said, no, we're already... No, I didn't. I said we could do that, and you said, no, we're already. No, I didn't. I said on the phone, EVS, and you go, yeah, well, you know. Yeah, check the text.

Check the text. I said six. I said seven because EVS has a thing. I said, oh, you already said it's a six. Okay, you said seven o'clock again. EVS is going to be streaming until then. Never mind. I see you already made the stream. Six o'clock. It is. That's what you said 7 o'clock again? EVS is going to be streaming until then. Never mind. I see you already made the stream.

6 o'clock. It is. That's what you said. Yeah. I said, I put out a poll. Most people want these 6 p.m. streams. We will see how much of a bump there is between us and Ethan. All right.

You could have made the argument. Well, I really would. I'm not arguing. Okay, then don't do it here, then. What do you mean, don't do it here? Oh, I'm not going to argue with you. That's not the point of the show. I know it is, but you go, oh, I'm not going to argue with you.

If I'm saying I'm not going to argue with you, I'm 100% arguing on the show. Fair enough. You are being very fair. With no number attached to it. Oh, my God. Let's see. Here we are. Euthanasia. Euthanasia.

Enthusiast for seven. Great show. Thank you. K to the Swiss for five. There's my giant Giswaldi. David Hodes for two. Yes. I got you to pronounce it right.

Hodes. Hodes. Hodes. No, he said like. You got a Hodes. Oh, you got a Hodes? Hold this. Hodes. Eric July would say hold this. Hodes. Hodes. Hodes. No, he said like... You got a Hodes. Oh, you got a Hodes? Hold this. Eric July would say hold this.

Hodes. Hodes. Hodes. Hodes for me. Rex Sexton for two. I'll write something with you, Vito. I know you're on my shirt list. Black Angus reviews for two.

Back Godfoe Universe on Indiegogo. 175 page manga. Wow. Rex, can you write a super killer issue? Yeah, write a super killer issue. Just like a generic one-off of super killer. Pick a universe and see how it goes. Yeah, and let's compare them.

Shut up. Utah-based Armenian for two. My script is good. I didn't say it wasn't good. I hope you better not say it's not good. I'm saying it to prove that he doesn't deserve to be your writing partner. Are you ready to read version three of the script? You're not going to read it again. I'll read it to prove that he doesn't deserve to be your writing partner. Are you ready to read version three of the script? You're not going to read it again.

I'll read it one more time. Really? Because I got some good changes in there. Utah-based Armenian for two. Vito's mystery box just contains head sheaths. Oh, God. I remember that. My head scraper got lost in the mail, so now I can't even scrape it.

Maybe I'll buy another one. Aklovich for five. The reason nerds are mad about Palworld is because the monsters, and to a lesser extent the humans, don't make them horny enough like Gardevoir. Oh, yeah, that's true. I have not researched the horniness of the Palworld monsters, so I do not know.

Those didn't look very attractive. No. They weren't sexualized, you know, the ones that you showed. Right. You need the one that has the tits like Gardevoir. Well, just got to have certain suggestions, you know? The ones that you showed. Right. You need the one that has the tits, like Gardevoir. Well, just got to have certain suggestions, you know? Yeah. Can't be furry with, like, Peter Pan shit coming off the knees.

Right. Like a little jockey. Makes me think of a midget or, like, a, you know, Mary Lou Retton. What Pokemon is it? Oh, no, everyone's obsessed with that Ranamon from Digimon. That's the one everybody wants to fuck. I think she does have tits. What?

I think it legitimately, at least her body is shaped like a lady. They give her tits in the furry art. Cool for five says, Vito, you don't need to use your resume to justify buying figures. I buy figures because they're cool and I like them. Yeah, but that's gay. I buy them for work, which is not gay. Aklovich for two. Vito, as a woman, you're probably a contralto.

Jose M for two. Vito, the hats took over a month. You hard R-tar. I didn't know why the hats weren't getting updated. I had to figure... I had to reload it into the store. It was a whole thing. What's this store you're on? I had to refresh the whatever. It's good. It printifies. It's way better. This is good.

Shit like that. Shut up. The thing we're using is great. Pigfeeler for five. Guys, you can get shirts at killdozer.industries. Trucks me shirt available now. Pigfeeler for five. Wife just interrupted the show to meekly say you have dishes to do.

How do I handle her? Say I'll do them tomorrow. I've been saying that every day for eight years. Tell her you're going to hire a maid. But you have to do it exactly 30% of the time or they won't believe you. Yeah. So just put it. She'll just do it if you keep stacking them up.

Jay Thompson for two. Every question Eric should be about warehouses at the Comic-Con. Hi. Yeah. I just started leasing a 600 square foot industrial business park warehouse. I'm wondering, do you have any forklift recommendations to reach them? Where do you hang your OSHA

poster? I have to put it up. I was thinking bathroom, but some people have it in the lunchroom. I just want to know what your warehouse gets. Some really like technical terms of like different shelving units. Yeah. I just bought a Marshall 310-SU industrial shelving unit. I've noticed that the brackets uh around the

leg area uh don't allow me to expand that uh can you recommend a different vendor perhaps too how long should i'm doing a drone shot of my warehouse for prospective investors how long should the drone shot be i can't believe 40't believe. 40 minutes? I can't believe. 45 minutes. There's a drone video of his fucking. Like, you forget about stuff that has happened. And you go, instead of like figuring out how to make a decent comic and make sure the comic had good art, he said, we got to get a drone to fly around our empty warehouse. It'll look amazing.

It'll look amazing. It'll get everyone excited. And no one was making fun of it. Yeah. Because they're all friends. Can't make fun of that guy. I think it's cool that he flew a drone around his warehouse. He's friends with him. Let's put it this way. He has a million fucking videos of his warehouse.

Why is there no interview with the artist of ISOM? Not a single one of like this is Cliff Richards. He made ISOM. Here's his process. Or shot of the Saska sisters chopping off a kid's dick. Yeah, exactly. You know, like they support. At one of their drag queen story hour rallies, perhaps.

Yeah. Or me too-ing somebody. Should have had that. Joe Cole for two. $100 a hand, banker or player? Gambler. Vito. Cool for two.

Thank you for shaving indie comics. Thank you for not killing yourself. Jacob for five. Vito, do you think you can get a stereos on the show? You got boogie on Maddox's. Also, Dick, you're too nice to Vito. We'll see what we can do. Spider Eternal for two.

I can super chat five fat five times in a row, not six. Ha ha. Beyond Wednesdays for five. I saw number one is the That Blows book of the week on tonight's House of Stein top 10 comics of the week show. Comic drama Alert. Wait, is that true? No, I think this is his show, not House of Stein.

Oh, that's his? Yeah, I think Beyond Wednesday is his show, not Alex Stein. I can't believe he did Alex Stein so dirty like that. Alex Stein, who's a great creator. Alex Stein looked genuinely shook on his show. He was like, you got me in a lot of trouble. I could have got kicked out of the place. He did a funny thing to get out of it, but I really hate that.

I could tell that it was a severe cope. Like, oh, well, you know, we're just going to smash a thing. I don't like that you're doing that voice because it demeans Alex Stein. I don't like that that's happening. I just have to say. I just have to say because I have to say, you know, that he got done dirty. Me and Alex Stein's friendship is older than the mountains.

Okay? I still would like respect. Although I think, I think, I think I've created troubles for him because now he's like, oh,

I don't understand, you know. Eric, Eric July is the blazes black guy. He's like, they're only one. Yeah. I know.

So it's like, he's got special status. Alex Stein is the black guy. They got a lot of white guys that can get rid of it. Like, one of the one. Yeah. I know. So it's like he's got special status. Alex Stein is in the back. They got a lot of white guys they can get rid of at any time. Like if one of the white guys goes off the wagon, like the producer or whatever, they can get rid of him. Yeah. You can't get rid of your one black guy.

You know how hard it is to find an Eric July? What a fucking crybaby. That's why they settled for him, even though he's a fucking dummy. They're like, well, you gotta have a black guy. Can't just be white guys and dumb ladies. We've trained him his whole life to be this conservative token. Come on. You got that track scholarship?

Fuck. Boosters. And they got one. Now Alex Stein almost scared him off. Listening to his goddamn music? They went to Alex. Backwards or whatever the fuck that was? They're like, Alex, if Eric July sees his shadow, he's going to disappear for another three years.

Six more weeks of respect. You have to give them. Exactly. Can't scare them off. Jarby Jimson for Ted Vito, I think it's neat that you're doing some of the panel layouts for Superkiller. Do you have any tips or book recommendations for teaching yourself comic page layouts? Yeah, other comics. That's it. I pull

comics I like off the shelf and I look at them intensely. And then sometimes I go, oh, man, you can do that? And you rip rock. Well, yeah, kind of. Okay. Like, I have this comic series I really like called Planetary. And most comic pages, if you look at them, normally the max number of horizontal panels will be, like, rows of three.

You know, so it'll be, like like two boxes, three boxes, two boxes. You know, always stacked in like threes. Like a warehouse? Yeah, like a warehouse. Like boxes stacked on top of each other. All right. Planetary, I've known this as I'm going through it. A lot of fours.

And I'm like, these thin strips, these thin. And I'm like, oh, fuck, you can do that? Oh, man. So that's been my life. Wow. I was looking at Death Note where Japan. And I'm like, oh, fuck. You can do that? Oh, man. So that's been my life. Wow. I was looking at Death Note where Japan, they're just like, you can put as many fucking boxes on a page as you want. I'm like, you can't put that many boxes in Japan.

You're crazy. You're crazy. And what's the max boxes that you could put on a page? Dude, I've seen Death Note. Well, I think the max. Five? No. You can, if you want, you can do.

I mean, because you could do a grid. You could do nine. three, three, three That's like the max you should do though Three, three, and three Yeah, Watchmen does that a couple times But that you're really getting into What if you had a big page like this? Okay

Well yeah, you could do that 24 by 36 Some comics do have interesting page dimensions And they don't fit on your shelf Right and you're mad that you own them I have a couple like that Mike Allred decided to be cute And he's like it's the same size as a

7 inch record cause it's about A superhero who's Record related All my shit is made for 7 inch records Exactly I'm like well it's kind of cool But it's a dumb gimmick So yeah I just read a lot of comics There's really Exactly. I'm like, well, it's kind of cool, but it's a dumb gimmick. See, I just read a lot of comics.

And also, I told you I have an editor. I have a guy. He's worked for DC Comics and shit. So I literally send him my panel layout, and I go, tell me what's wrong. And he goes, you have too many panels up here. Move this here. Move that to the next page. And I go, got it. And then I fix it. Jesus. Get a guy. Get a guy who knows what he's doing. Pig Filler for five. Speaking of men, she's precious, but the beginning of her appearance on PKA was a little painful. She pulled it up in the end. People said that.

They said, uh... Hey, uh... What is this like? I'm just gonna criticize mint time? What the fuck kind of comment is that to be making? Well, I was gonna say that, uh, everybody said, you know... That's a huge show. She's probably nervous. Yeah, well, that's the thing. Jesus. Well, I wanna say, you know, every comment I said said, you know,

I think when you go on a show for the first time, yeah, you're a little nervous. You got nerves. But then apparently she settled right in and had a great time. So I think everybody should watch Mint Salad on PKA. You should have gone out and just N-word PKA, 100,000, whatever viewers. That's why you come in hot. When I go on these shows, when I go on Kick or Keep, I'm like, just going hot. You said the N word. I said

the N word, dick. There's nothing hotter than that. Might have went a little too... You know Randy called me up to yell at me about that? Yeah. He's like, bro, you can't... Oh, man. I told him the ADR didn't later to me. I used the normal version

and then they made it worse. That was a clip that somebody else it worse. Oh, okay. That was a clip that somebody else put together. Oh, let's see. High speed life for 10 minutes. It needs more support. Let's go, Vita Files. We love mid-sale.

Let's run with your idea for five. Eric, you'll lie more like Eric. You'll shit for brains. That's a good one. Jacob for two. Dick, can I have your blessing to make a biggest problem be comic? No. No.

Absolutely not. What are you talking about? Blessing? You can send us fan art if you want. We'll look at it. You can do whatever you want. Verse for ten. If you won't get on the scale, we'll use that $200 you didn't earn to pay for some super killer shipping for the fans.

You guys, shut the fuck up with this shipping shit. Okay? As I've explained it, do you want Indiegogo to take 8% of the shipping money? No? Then shut the fuck up, okay? Why give 8% away when I can just charge it for you later? It was on the page, and if anyone really has a problem with it, send me a message. I'll refund your money or whatever.

Oh, it's a tantrum move that you're doing. It's not a tantrum move. Yeah, it is, because you're not like, sorry. You're like, oh, well, I guess if you don't like it, then I'll just blow everything up. How about that? I'll make the whole comic out of 3D assets. Yeah, that's basically the way it is. Now you're going like, sorry. You're like, oh, well, I guess if you don't like it, then I'll just blow everything up. How about that? I'll make the whole comic out of 3D assets. Yeah, that's basically the way it is. Now you're going to get that.

The shipping total is going to be like 10 grand. That's like 800 bucks I would add to give them. That's a lot of money. You blew all that on lunchboxes. I blew all that on lunchboxes. You're right. I did blow all that on lunchboxes. I hate you people.

I hate all you fucking people. DJ, for 10, everyone should refund Super Killer until Vito gets on the scale. Hashtag refund Super Killer. Fine. I don't care. I think you would pick not getting on the scale over your comic book. I've watched a lot of Intervention.

I know how it plays out. This is not an Intervention scenario. Yes, it is. Me stepping on the scale for... At no point in intervention did I go, oh, also, we need you to publicly humiliate yourself in front of an audience of a thousand people. That's the

entire show. What are you talking about? Yeah, well, that's the thing, though. Their addictions are so bad that their families are addicted to enabling them. That's the whole point of the fucking show. I know. Okay, look, I get that, but in the immediate... I've defeated my own point. Okay, look. I get that, but in the immediate... I've defeated my own point.

Let's see. Euthanasia Enthusiast for seven. Vito, aka Slim Boogie. I'll accept that. Dickwood for one. Puts a smiling poop emoji. Cycle Crusher for 20. Hey, Vito, that XXXLarge shirt is perfect for you, who way more than Lizzo ever did. Way more than Lizzo

ever did. Thank you than Lizzo ever did. Thank you. Jacob for two. Dick, I'm 5'3", 190. How much to gain until I look cool? Oh, you got to get over 200, buddy. I would say over 210 at least if you're 6'3". Yeah.

Beyond Wednesdays for five, I'm a fat former heroin addict. I feel your pain, Vito. Scale. Well, you didn't get the 200 bucks like you threatened. If I get the extra 200, I'll go buy some heroin. Hopefully I'll be one of the heroin guys for... I saw it! All right, whatever.

Who are you texting? I'm not texting anybody. Are you going to read it? You got to read your way up there. Who are you texting? I'm not texting anybody! Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Hold on, hold on, hold on. I gotta load it. I gotta get my app. I gotta find my app. Okay, okay, okay. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm loading my app. I deleted it. I never thought I would use it again. This is so stupid.

Okay. Go ahead. Hop on. Make sure you position it correctly so you don't, you know, complain about the results. I can't fucking believe it. I can't fucking believe it. I can't fucking believe it. Oh, come on. Oh, come on.

Fuck. What? Yeah. What do you think it was? It was 293 the other fucking day. Man, you had an easy win with that one. What was it? 299.2.

Okay. Under 300. Well, is that good or bad? Under 300 is very good. It's not very good. It's still bad. In the mornings. You got to be a little bit positive about it. No, it's bad. Why. It's still bad. In the mornings. You got to be a little bit positive about it.

No, it's bad. Why? It could be worse. In the mornings, it's like 293, okay? Vito, this is a big win. How is this a big win? Because you overcame your control over the narrative around your weight, and you're under 300.

That's less than. Being under 300 is not. I should be at like 280 at most. Well, you should be at 210 at most. At most, I said. All right. This is a big win for you. This is not a big win.

This is a loss. This is an L. It's still less than you started on this show. It is less than. That's an easy bar to hit. Not necessarily. Boogie is still. Dude, 299 is not a W. I necessarily. Boogie is still fatter than hell.

That is not a W. I have no idea where you're considering this is a W. I think this is a W. You have managed to keep off 10 pounds. I've kept, well, there's more, because again, it's at the end of the day. It's literally what? 8.30. Is this how you talk to yourself? Shut up. I drank a Diet Pepsi.

I drank a fucking Dr. Pepper, whatever. DP. I drank You Diet Pepsi. I drank a fucking- Bro, that's not- A Dr. Pepper, whatever. DP. I drank- You have them in the fridge. This is a mixer, dude. First of all, it's for women. That's why it's so tiny.

Okay, it's good that I drank a tiny one. It's good that it's not a full one. Drink coffee or water. Well, coffee's not that much better, but I drank a big coffee. Wait, coffee is- A diuretic? Coffee has no calories. You can drink coffee all day. I put cream in it. Wait, coffee is, uh... A diuretic? Coffee has no calories. You can drink coffee all day.

I put cream in it. I put the sugar in it. Okay. So you don't drink Diet Dr. Pepper. It's just Dr. Pepper. If you had Diet Dr. Pepper, I would drink Diet Dr. Pepper. I will get a pallet of Diet Dr. Pepper if that's what you drink. I don't like Diet Dr. Pepper.

Okay, what do you like? Give me that Prime stuff. I'll lock the fucking I'm not buying Logan Paul's fucking Prime. What the fuck? It's my drink. I do the show. Shouldn't I have the drink I like? Okay, get a pallet of Prime. Thank you. And you'll store it here for me? You can't talk

to yourself like that. Like, this is not a win. Okay. It feels like an L. That's cause you did the scale. You don't understand. The audience is going to treat that as an L That's cause you did the scale You don't understand, the audience is going to treat that as an L Just cause you're beating yourself up Okay It's not great, but it's not bad

It's pretty good You kept my weight off Did you or did you not keep weight off? I kept some weight off, yeah People don't do that, people always get way down and then they go right back up You went down and went up, but not all the way up. It's pretty good. You could ride that.

I'm going to say that I've lost 15 pounds total and I need to get back on the wagon. Okay? Okay, well. I think I'm down 15, which is better than nothing. Yeah? I think it's good. See, this is why this bit sucks. David Hodes

for two. Nice t-shirt Masterson. I did mention your t-shirt is good. Nice tapestry Vito. Oh, my shirt's a tapestry. I get it. Michael Winning for two. Took you a second to get that one. Took you a second to get that one, didn't it? Michael Winning for two. I'll send Vito

a scalp scraper. You might as well. Please don't. Rex Sexton for two. Super killer competition. Rex Sexton, man of substance. Yes. Yes. Did anybody send us something for the show? Somebody said they were sending something in. You got to go to your P.O. box if you didn't get it yet. Yeah, I do. I have a present, but it's too late. I got to break it out earlier. Okay.

Let's see. Aklovich for two. How much do you see Vito do squat lifts on the show? We're not adding to the bit. Stop. Riley Edwards for two. Congratulations, Vito. 0.8 under 300. That's good. Klovich for two. How much did you see Vito do squat lifts on the show? We're not adding to the bit. Stop. Riley Edwards for two. Congratulations, Vito. 0.8 under 300. That's good. Kua for two. Thanks for getting on the scale.

You didn't weigh yourself again, so I know that you know that it was good. Because every other time you've complained about the scale being crooked and you weighed it again. But this time you just accepted it right away. So I know that you know it's good. I hate all you people. Chad Dragon for ten. Vito, three lifts. No.

Okay? No. This is not the time to give me a deadlift fucking routine. Just stop. No, don't do deadlifts. Riley Edwards for two. We love you, Vito. Thank you.

Any progress is good progress, too. Why don't you be fair to yourself, Leafy? I know what you're doing. I get it. Wait, didn't you just say it? No, I said, why don't you be fair? Oh, okay. I did not include the two. I skipped

it around. You got it. I think you should punish yourself for thinking otherwise. Oh, guys, what a great show. I want to thank all our supporters on Patreon. I want to remind everybody, we have a new bonus episode, The Biggest Problem in 2023, and we'll have another new bonus

episode coming very soon. Yeah, we talked about the Jewish tunnels in that. We talked about the Jewish tunnels. We talked about Eric July a little bit, I think. Yeah. Get all the drama over on Patreon. Get all the fun. Yeah.

And we've got to come up with a theme for February. If anyone has any good February themes. If a movie is coming out, you know, a franchise, a big franchise film. We've done Star Wars before. We've done whatever. Harry Potter. Is there any Harry Potter is coming out You know a franchise Big franchise film We've done Star Wars before We've done Whatever Harry Potter

Is there any Harry Potter shit coming out? Oh man We gotta We gotta change the way we do I don't know Something about the bonus episodes Like it's so long on Harry Potter It's too much

Like Harry Potter's a good idea But we gotta have like two then Cause a whole hour on Harry Potter I think that do you know what I'm saying though? it feels like it's too long like if it was Harry Potter and

like I don't know fucking He-Man like what was the worst of those two but I don't think that's a good idea I think if we can't handle one topic for a full show we've failed I think that like we should just step up to the plate. Black history month, that's fun. There's a lot of black problems. But that's not

how shows work. They have an A plot and a B plot. So it would make sense to have a Harry Potter and something else also. 40 minute shows always have... Oh, the biggest problem in Harry Potter and fast food franchises.

Yeah. Something. You know what I'm saying? Something. Okay, how about this? I'm not saying I know. Okay, we could call it biggest problem in Harry Potter. We each do one Harry Potter problem, and then we can come up with something else to be the B part of the show. And then we only need one problem each. That's what I'm saying. Okay, but we would still call it biggest problem in Harry Potter. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The focal point. Yeah. And then we could have a second bit. Yeah, and the second thing's about nothing only obliquely related to Harry Potter. Or not at all. It could be something else entirely. All right. Okay. Bye, everyone. Why don't we just do another movie-roo?

What movie do you want to see? I got advanced tickets to see the Snoop... Snoop... Wait, wait, wait. Snoop Dogg's in a movie where he's got to, like, coach kids basketball or something. It looks terrible.

Basketball? No, I don't even... Wow, not swimming or water polo or something? I think it's actually football, so that's... Black people play football as well. Yeah.

Yeah. White people play that too, though. It's all the way on the other side of town, though, so I don't want to go. I think we should review Rebel Moon, the R-rated cut

when it comes out. Oh, no, they're making more of making more of that shit yeah dude they're taking the movie you saw but they're you know how that was pg-13 they're making a version with like all the blood and like the shit they cut out of it dude i can't watch it knowing that it's not star wars now it's like total dog shit yeah it's like what is this it what is this? It sucks, but fun sucks. It's great. No, no, no. All right, well, you don't have to review it with me. I just thought it would be fun. Another movie.

If somebody has a great idea for a great bonus episode, let us know in the comments. Yeah. We will be back soon. All right. Goodbye. Goodbye, and thank you, Vito. Vito won. They're saying, see?

Vito is.97 Lizzo's. Oh, my God. The scale at my house is much nicer. Dude.