The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 153

Episode Date: August 24, 2024

Okay, that was working. Uhhhh... I got some cool stuff in the store now. There you go. What store? In my what not store. Oh, your store, okay. What's cool about it? Well, just like weird...

I got the Nintendo Game Pack cards from 1989, you remember those? Trading cards? Kind of. They were trading cards, but they had... They were like lottery ticket cards. They were trading cards, but they had, they're like lottery ticket cards. They're scratch offs. Okay. So it'll have like, you just get Mario's or something? You'll have Mario, it shows like Mario at the left side of the stage and it's like choose three bubbles to scratch off. And if you hit, you know, this many coins you win. What do you

win? Nothing? Yeah, nothing. You win the fact that you beat the card I was gonna bring that in actually kids into gambling early. Yeah. Well, yeah Trading cards and whatever else. Yeah, the packs are nice though. So I'm selling those on there Yeah, I'm tired today or low today Well, I'm always low. I've got the Donkey Kong trading card game from Japan. I got the Animal Crossing e-reader cards. You remember the e-reader for the GameCube, for the Game Boy?

I really know. That was when they released a device. This was actually a good idea. Uh-huh. I'm sad that, like, America, we didn't get most of the cards. It was a device that went on your Game Boy Advance. Yeah. And you could get playing cards

and swipe them like a credit card. Oh man, okay, and then what? Even some of the Pokemon cards had the little dot patterns on the left side for a period of time. Yes, okay, okay. They had data so you could theoretically get little mini games or little unlock bonuses, unlock levels. Okay.

And then what? And then we didn't really get them in America. We didn't get them in America? No, we only got, they sold American consumers too stupid to understand the genius of buying cards and swiping them. Well yeah, it's awesome. It was like, in Japan you could play the Mega Man game and you could like swipe a card

to give Mega Man a special power. How about one that you swiped it and maybe your video games would melt? Nah, I don't want that. Or go like, try again, loser. Swiping is fun. Everyone wants to swipe. Something like that.

Speaking of which- There's one that you swipe and it says, a guy jizzed on that card. I don't think they have that. Biggest problem with card games is available at Patreon.com slash biggest problem. Yeah? A lot of card game stuff going on these days. lot of card game stuff going on these days. A lot of card game stuff going on these days. You wanna do a show? Come on. You wanna do a show here?

Come on with this. Just cause I have a relaxed tone. You're all like- I know what the tone is cause I can measure it. I can prove scientifically what the tone is. Yeah, so you can be the screamy guy. Oh! And I can just go wild and- Cruise through it. Scientifically what the tone is yes, so you can be the enter you can be the screamy guy. Oh Well cruise through it well, it's like did Ed McMahon yell the whole time no Yeah, I think he did I think he started by yelling. That's his whole job. All right. I think he can here's Johnny That's like his whole purpose Hank. I'll be the Hank Kingsley. He was a very you know hey now

Yeah, that's what you see is your Contribution. I'm the Hank Kingsley. Hey, I'll just play the maybe the theme song. Well figure it out No, cuz now there's pressure There should always be pressure. I don't want pressure There should be pressure Biggest problem in the universe Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe! Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe! The only show that ranks every problem in the universe.

From forcing milk into schools to fake tits made for fools. That's okay, smelly. From a dairy conspiracy to shortsliners bothering me. Not very funny. Terrible. Terrible. Yeah. Oh, I guess that's it. I'm your host, Dick Maschinen. Joining me is always Vito Giswoldi. Hi, Dick You're listening to NPR. Yeah, the time is 11. It's not going well for you. Oh RFK Just dumped it in your just shit in your Cheerios

I have no idea. I didn't watch that shit. He assume I follow any of this political shit, I don't care. Tim Walz, you are addicted to Twitter. I know that you know everything that's going on. No, because I don't watch it, because here's a video of Kamala, the only thing I saw was Lil Jon going, turn down for votes. Lil Jon was involved? John Wayne, what's his fucking name? Not John Wayne, I know little John

Yeah, he's the one who goes turning down for what yes. Yeah. Yeah, he did that at the they're like oh shit It was a crunking there was some crunking They were doing that thing where they're like and now the delegates from Ohio would turn down for what? It comes out of that part. That's pretty good. I love that part. It's a pretty good surprise Everybody give me your best your best comedian and be like, that's pretty good. I love that part. That's a pretty good surprise. Oh, everybody give me your best comedian material. Yeah, that was great. Good job. And then everyone's going,

doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot doot. Wow. Who was it? Zach Galifianakis said something today and I was like, he's kind of got a point, which is like every time the Democrats start to like move and like a like everybody's behind them and they're all excited yeah they get all like fucking celebrity happy and destroy all the goodwill or they love it and he's like you're Seth Rogen everybody

everybody we're all we're in a positive message right right we're moving forward we're united Trump's a bad guy he's got that little creep with the inset eyes But we're all here together to say hello to Seth Rogan That was what happened with Hillary's is like finally the Democrats might be connecting with like real people on the ground We're all voters or whatever else and they go like and here's Madonna to sing a song and you're like, okay Here's Beyonce's coming. Yeah Wow, okay. Here's Beyonce's coming. Yeah, cause that's, oh wow, okay. That's all they know, I guess.

Beyonce gonna fix my house? Here's Taylor Swift. Swifties. None of which can vote, they're all eight. Anyway, all I know about politics is little John is throwing in the Kamala camp. Little John? Who gives a fuck about little John?

I don't fucking know. Okay, here's um, oh yeah. I forgot how to do this. Very disappointing results last week, I'm very disappointed in everyone. Fool's Tits, number one. Obviously, Mandatory Milk, which I think should have won, but...

Should have won, but, you know, the well researched problems on this website do not necessarily outweigh I have brought in more research lying women. I have put in more research to fool sits than you Well, your research does not exactly it's a different kind of same. I'm not jacking off to it. It's a little as I hate it It's a little so Locking yourself out. I thought that should have been higher too, but at least higher than milk. Locking yourself out is pretty annoying. That should be higher than milk, well the milk one was pretty good.

Shorts that have a liner, dead last. That's the- Shorts that have a liner. Worst. So did you actually take any time to look up why shorts have a liner? What do you mean? No, I looked it up after the show because I'm actually curious about things. Okay, why would you ask it like that? Well, I'm just, I want to know, it's like weird that it's-

Did you take like a setup for you to say that you did? Well, because it's your problem and it's like if this is bothering you so much, do you not have a naturally curious mind that you don't want to figure out? They're wrong, that's why. Because they're idiots in charge of the shorts manufacturing process.

It's supposed to be- Probably women to make you miserable, yeah. It's just extra support for running manufacturing process. It's supposed to be, you know, probably women to make you miserable. Yeah, extra support for running shorts for running. Yeah, but running shorts are little athletic activity, not long like these. I think it's just going to run in giant shorts like this. They'll be moving bicycling or something. No, definitely not for bicycling. Well, you want to keep everything you want to keep everything contained.

That was my they're also for shitting in as we Yeah, that was my problem is thinking that anyone in this audience is exercising or buying new clothing. Mm-hmm So they don't encounter this Okay Napoleon says a chess clock in TCG's would eliminate all the ambiguity of slow play. It needs to be implemented. Yeah, I agree I got safe stuff like you think by the chess clock and I was so mad that I turned it off. I was playing Magic Online. Yeah. My deck was like so fucking good. Okay. And then we got into the final match. We each had two minutes on the clock.

Yeah. And I just, I dropped the ball. All I had to do was play defensively and run his clock out, but I'm not good at playing defensively and I was making too many moves and my clock was going down and then I just ran out of time and I got an automatic match loss. What a shitty game. It sucks. What a waste of time to be playing this game. And I was like six minutes ahead at one point and I don't know what happened. Then that guy, that's what I hate. I I hate losing on time how often does it happen to you whenever you play online every once in a while yeah every once in a while you lose on time you just sitting there well if you're playing a deck that's you know complicated it's got a lot of

different shit you gotta do you know what I'm gonna do I'm gonna start instituting a chess clock on Scrabble games in this house that would be smart because they take way too long more games should implement the chess clock. Also the chess clock seems fun. You get something to hit. Yeah. Count it. Boom! That's why Boggle has a dangin' sand clock. I don't know anything about Boggle. You don't know anything about Boggle? You're not a Boggleman? I don't know anything about Boggle. Oh bro, we gotta boggle it up. No, it's just got a little, it's got an hourglass. What do you mean you're not gonna play boggle? I don't want to I don't want to learn a new game. It's it's I'm done I don't want to learn anymore game once. It's not even learning it

I don't know how to play boggle so I don't know how to play that's all words You know what a word is not really not in this one scrabble, but you won't play boggle I just put letters down one of the classic old games boggle scrabble Well Poggle shiggle that sounds like a really bad bit Classic old games. Boggle, Scrabble. Ugh. Poggle, Chiggle. That sounds like a really bad bit. Was that in your stand up? No. It could be though.

Jay says, I bought a pair of shorts right before I finished this episode when I got home. They had a lining and I wanted to kill myself. Cut it out! Just cut it out! That's not how shorts work. Danny Fiss says, I have some suggestions if you still wanted to do the biggest problem in Dungeons and Dragons. I think your best bet for making it entertaining is to do an old school dungeon crawl.

Modern D&D is too improv-y with too much shit to learn. Also get Carl from WATP involved as he has shit on so many D&D podcasts. The new D&D is just like about being a gay orc making a making bread, right? It's a bread cafe. It'll be like your mission is to plan a goblin wedding, right? Yeah. Oh good. I Specialized in a cake. Yeah making you roll for like your queer fact check for your queer resistance Let me let me roll to see which type of icing. Oh no! I can't use buttercream, because I only rolled an eight. We could be the wheelchair guys. We could just have a whole...

A D&D podcast of just guys in the wheelchair. Yeah, we have a retarded wizard, Tim Walz's son is a wizard in our group. Disabled and dragons. D&D and dragons and disabled That would be fun We all have to roleplay as crippled guys whoa I'm gonna really embrace it to be really aggressive about the Crippled calls like that. I got a reach out to what's his name that uh, what's that crippled guy who we like? Uh

Ricky Berwick Ricky Berwick. He's too big for us. What do you mean? I've talked to him You've talked to him you want him to play in this game. He uh How does he work the mouse like and do those videos like he does? He that's the thing though is he's like he's like ultra the best kind of handicapped where he's just like He's got lobster hands, but he's got complete control over him, you know? He's not like one of these spastic's who's like knocking things over, he's got... Oh, he has control over all that shit?

He's like the advanced, yeah, he's like... Could he balance a beer on his head? Like if he was here, could I balance an open beer on his head? I think that guy, you know, he takes that wheelchair over ramps. He can grind on that thing But he wouldn't want to play a disabled person because he's a little joke is he would be the one not disabled guy And we can't help them Just take just use your hands just grab it like turn the crank It's it's just he's gonna be like use it like a seven foot tall paladin with just like perfectly no disabilities whatsoever.

He can run really fast. And the rest of us are just like, wheeling behind him. That'd be pretty good. Yeah. Wait, wait up, wait up, Paladin Ricky! He's a cleric that worships a retarded god. So he has to take care of us.

Exactly, he's a paladin, he's neutral. This is good, this is funny stuff. And we can try to stop the war in Israel. Israel-estat-israel-io. Let's just call it Israel. I'm trying to think of a fantasy variant name, but no, it's just Israel. Why not sneak in through the tunnels with our wheelchairs and prove to everybody that we're not hindered by them.

Jew Darenstein. How about that? I don't want to have any... I don't want to have Jew anywhere near... The kingdom of Shekultonia. How about that? See, I don't want it to be... No jokes. It's just gotta be, we're going to save Israel from hurting themselves, wiping out Palestine. The legendary palace of Israel. And they have Shekuls in there. Israel, yes. All right's we'll figure it out.

Okay, I do like Shekel-topia though. No, that's let me tell you something that's not good. Cute little things are bad. Okay, James Simeone says, Dick and Vito refusing to listen to a two-minute voicemail instead choosing to mock the caller for five minutes is what makes the show great. I mean, you know... Come on, man.

Now I shit my pants. Why don't you ruminate on that for a sec? Hold on for a second. Think about that one. I'm just gonna leave that out there. Hahaha! If you leave... Look, I see the time stamp on the voicemail

and anytime it says two minutes 15 seconds I go this is gonna suck Alright, it's gonna be a guy doing shtick Hey, after I poop my pants just think about that one for a second there. No just do it. Just do the say it I with my my Biggest dread in doing the thing I dread the most doing voicemails is seeing the same number twice Because the first one's always three minutes, which means he got cut off by the oh god Eight six seven says veto is in a reverse parasocial relationship with his audience in which he is the one being abused somehow

What do you think about that? I don't know I feel good my audience has been a feel good about the audience I put a YouTube video about Star Wars for some fucking reason Everybody's happy. They're only oh vetoes back Complaining about Star Wars the acolyte complaining about useless Star Wars bullshit. Well, what's in it? What's in the video? Yeah, 20 minutes of me explaining why star is that sucked? Cuz just everybody front all the promo materials just everybody frowning. It's just Jedi gone There should be one dressed like a clown like putting on clown makeup for his yeah something fun Honk honk right there's never been a silly Jedi no there have all the Jedi have been silly

Okay, what Obi-Wan Kenobi was silly? How is he silly remember when the he could they can pull over the stormtroopers and they go? We're gonna need to see these droids papers and he looks like Okay, you know need to see this move along he's all he's all smug about it He's like look what I did yeah, what he's sneaking around the Death Star and he's like and the Star Troopers like what was that? No, he's like Yes sneaky. He's a little Yoda's a little fuck too they're all little sneaky Goblin Fun Boys like even Yoda's like yeah and he's even doing that when Luke isn't on camera

yeah why is he just doing that for himself for some reason all these modern writers all they remember about the Jedi was like Luke and Robes being all brooding or whatever and they don't Remember that all the Jedi were true little goofy trickster wizards. Is that in the video fucking with everyone? Yeah, that's what I'm talking about Okay, that's good interesting Cool ATF agent says veto we need government regulations so people don't sell poison or something The government starts to regulate the dairy industry. Years later, starts forcing milk into kids' hands,

which could be considered poisoned, depending on race. Vito, what the fuck? Why is the government forcing milk on kids? Well, if the government wasn't there, I think the milk would actually be poisoned. At least this, the milk to get kids to throw away, not poison milk.

Which way do we go? We just have to have less regulation? Do we have regulators for the regulations? There's some tricky wiki of regulation. Let's put it that way. OK. Maybe just like a sign. Hey, don't put any poison in this.

You ever read about that, what was it, that factory somewhere in America that's building tanks? And the military, the army keeps going, please stop making tanks. We have enough tanks. We're not in a land war I'm making them. We don't need tanks. Yeah, and then the guy the congressman whose district it is is like well Can't shut the tank factory down. I don't have a job So we've just been endlessly producing Abrams tanks no one can use

For no reason big ginger who they sit around for no reason. Big Ginger. Ooh, almost messed that one up. Whatever I'm do, I'm disappointed in a different way. Way to go Vito, you understand the bit. There you go. So sit there. There you go.

Um, FR8. I didn't get this one. Imagine that the person that gets locked out of their house doesn't like Age of Empires? What does that mean? I don't know. But also- It's a slam on you, I'm sure. Well no, cause you said we were talking about mobile games and you brought up Age of Empires? What does that mean? Don't know. But also, it's a slam on you, I'm sure. Well, no, because you said we were talking about mobile games and you brought up Age of Empires.

But Age of Empires is the good PC game. Oh. I think it's like Clash of Empires is the mobile game that is specifically named to trick people into thinking it's Age of Empires. Yeah. I think you're right. There were some comments that were like,

how can they be talking shit about Age of Empires? It's like, no, no, we met the other of empires. Sorry guys You have to pay attention a tiny bit and realize that we're talking about a scam mobile game, right? Maybe listen to that part first and use some context clues. You know they learn in fifth grade Tattiest Mason says I just realized gambit would be such a cool a much cooler x-man if he was throwing a hundred dollar valued magic or other trading Cards instead of just boring regular playing cards now. This is a really good idea They never give gambit anything other than the French accent which is tiresome. They don't explore His fascination with playing cards, which he doesn't need to have I mean

It would just be cool if was there as an x-men thing where he's just like like, oh, what are you gonna do throw poker cards at me? He's like Mona me I've delved into my monocrypt and I have fun This is my best 9 with alpha 9s that I have here Wolverine I've got a black ludis just for you Maybe the cards are more powerful since the weight of a human the cognitive human something yeah yeah something to do other than just be French it would be cool if you threw Pokemon I've got these jories all the back in 2003 yes I was so we'll destroy this is a misprint okay yeah enough gambit material that's it I've got

Central Park five stuff people like what was your gay gambit? I love gay gay gambit. I love gay and a new character. I'll check out the mic and charge my monkey box for you How'd you like a charge of monkey box a squirt in your face? There's got to be some gay guy out there who goes yeah, I was there when that first guy fucked that monkey. Oh Yeah, I saw that go down. Is that what really happened? That's how AIDS got started. Someone fucked a monkey?

All that shit's real? It has to be. I don't know if it has to be. Well there's no other explanation. Eating a monkey? You got attacked by a monkey that you're trying to fuck? Maybe? I think a guy, probably in San Francisco,

imported a monkey. Not Senegal? I forget, where was ground zero for AIDS? Where are people gonna be fucking monkeys? Hmm, San Francisco, imported a monkey. Not Senegal? I forget, where was Ground Zero for AIDS? Where are people gonna be fucking monkeys? Hmm, San Francisco? Somebody got the idea to fuck a monkey. Well, I think they brought a monkey. The Congo?

Hmm. There was a rare period of time I was reading about where getting a pet monkey, in the back of the comic books, it would be like, hey, get a pet monkey sent to your house. Yeah. They would just ship it to you, a monkey. The first time I went to San Francisco, we drove all night, we got up there with my life coach,

and there was a pet, we came upon a pet store that said monkeys. We waited for it to open and went inside. And they said, I said, where's the monkeys at? He goes, we don't have any monkeys. What the fuck? Says it right out, we've been waiting all night for this shit. She said, get out of here.

You can't sell monkeys anywhere. You were waiting for us to open? Alright, you got anything else? No, that's it. Play me a song, folks, because we got a very exciting segment called Vote It Up. Dick missed the show again And the calling show just didn't come Vote it up when October ends Here comes the shill again, from morning super killer It's a scam artist now, because it's never coming out.

That'll come out. Biggest problem that shows is where you have to go and vote. Vote it up when October ends. Oh, man, did you see that you getting roasted by Carl? Yeah, but I thought it was funny. Oh, you thought that Carl was wrong? Yeah, well, I was like, here's the thing. You take all those clips out of context. I'm like, oh, Vito is a comedic mastermind.

This is hilarious. OK, I did see. If you go to the WHTP channel, I like all those clips out of context. I'm like, oh, Vito is a comedic mastermind. This is hilarious. Okay. I did see, if you go to the WHTP channel, I was Cringe of the Week at the live show. That Tony was at. Yeah. So Tony's there minding his own business. Tony's in the audience.

Not knowing that Carl's about to rip apart the episode he just recorded with you. I was sad that I saw Kumio was doing some stuff. And well, I wish Kumio had gotten in on this, but. Ripping on you. Kumio was too busy watching videos of black people Yeah... Doing anything...

On cruises... Yeah... Hahaha! Kumia's Twitter at this point has just got to the point where other people are starting to notice what I noticed about Kumia's Twitter It's great! It's really great! It's crazy! I'm like wow! He's like a gym leader in Pokemon

You gotta go fight the racist gym leader Who's oh Kumia yeah yeah Yeah Kumia's clearly the a gym leader in Pokemon. You gotta go fight the racist gym leader. Who's Okumia, yeah. Yeah, Okumia's clearly the racist gym leader. He's the most. Which Pokemon you have? I got a Mankey right here! Oh, shocker. All these Pokemon are Mankeys and Prime Apes.

What'd you name it? Uh, Diglett? I named it... Oh, Entos? Oh no, the thing that sucks is, I was interputting the name and the button got stuck, so it's just, na na na na na na na na. Anyway guys, welcome to Voted Up. This is the MFN Gym. The M NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN Really count seven. Well, what about this one? One said eight. Please put that back in your bag.

We don't want to look at that. Kicking Kewpie out of the Junto League. Well, welcome to Voted Up, where we talk about past problems. Put them in the new light, guys. I got two news stories for you. From episode 50, this is, of course, a problem close to my heart. It's discontinued food fakeouts.

Oh, yeah. That your favorite food items are discontinued. They're gone forever, only to return in a new exciting way to scam you out of your money yet again. Well Dick, Taco Bell fans nationwide could soon get a taste of the past. As over the last week, the fast food chain has begun a test market launch of certain nostalgic food items that haven't appeared on the menu for years. Taco Bell? Taco Bell.

They're always fucking around with their... They are always fucking around. They gotta bring that dog back. The, uh, the Chihuahua. Yo quiero Taco Bell. Yeah, we all... Yeah, that guy was great. Was that a big moment for the Mexican community?

You finally had a guy, you know? We consider Taco Bell our whole restaurant. Yeah, but... But yes. But I'm saying, like, you know... They finally got a. They finally got a McDonald's and Ronald McDonald. That's clearly a white guy. Grimace black guy.

Jack in the Box guy. The Fry Guys are Mexicans. The Fry Guys are Mexicans. I think some of the Nugget Buddies are Mexicans. Oh that's who I meant. The Fry Guys are Polish. Well, Dick. The front guys were. The front guys are Polish. Yeah. Well, Dick, these items were launched at test markets in Southern California.

I don't know if they're still available here. Where are they? May move to the broader market, depending on popularity. I swear to God, if you did a six hour video on the history of Taco Bell, like, you know know Zelda timeline videos? Yeah, I know. But Taco Bell timeline, like here was the Chalupa.

And the Chalupa breaks into the Gordota. Yeah, exactly. And the Chonrupa. Like, that would be the most fucking fascinating. You could give a TED Talk on it. I love all those timelines. You ever see the Tony Hawk timeline that somebody invented? No, no.

And they're like, well, Tony Hawk 4 leads into this Tony Hawk game. But Tony Hawk's American Wasteland is the alternate universe where Bam Margera challenges Tony Hawk for supreme skateboard dominance. For supremacy? OK. Yeah, and there's like splits like the Zelda timeline.

Bro, that guy's fat. That's the only celebrity news I can tolerate. Bam Margera? Bam Margera, how fat he is. I saw a video. He's posted on Instagram just a picture of him cuddling up with Ryan Dunn's grave, and I'm like, I get it.

You're sad your friend's dead? Does it have to be your only defining trait for the next? Is he fucking it like Saltburn? Dude, he's literally- Like the end of Saltburn? It's like his dead girlfriend or something that he's laying his head on it with flowers. He's like, I miss you, buddy.

I think this has gone from cute to pathetic, man. This is weird. I think that whole, that archetype of man of guy was like really big starting with Green Day and Ending with Ryan Dunn dying. I think cuz we all realized that they're actually just gay Well, oh wait, I thought this was like a new way to be a guy. You're just gay. Yeah shit No, we've had that forever. Is there another type of guy? No Yeah, shit. No, we've had that forever. Is there another type of guy? No Finally a straight guy no no no that's another gay guy you're being

No no no no no no no no I had to break He's actually Nick but it's so straight? He's straightened Milo Milo Milo has to be straight Come from a different decade in Taco Bell's history from the 1960s one of the original Taco Bell menu items the tostada Okay, corn tortilla with a little, what do you call it? Refried beans on it. Yeah, beans. Okay. From the 70s, the-

They discontinued the Tostada? Yeah, apparently they discontinued it in like the 2000s. Are they gonna put Mountain Dew on it or something? No, it's just gonna be- Taco Bell's a little much with their berry, with their Mountain Dew shoes and everything. Code red, yeah. Yeah.

They got some, the new tacos, they got these like new Cantina tacos a taco ball What they're like pillow e soft okay? Yeah, very good. All right very good from the 1970s We're bringing back the green burrito What did you say about the pizza that was in my house by the way when you got here look like shit? When my girlfriend goes you want a piece of pizza, and you said you a piece of pizza and you said ew. It looked like shit. How was that?

Cause I looked at it and I'm like ugh. It looked like one of those microwavable pizzas. It was not. It was cooked in the oven. Yeah but it looks terrible. You didn't do what I said. The worst. You didn't do what I said to the pizza.

The worst you can say is no. Ew. Oh I'm just telling ya. Do watch the pizza. You need to eat that crust is uh, it's got a pale color to it. Oh you gotta put olive oil on it? You gotta put a little oil around the crush. I wasn't cooking pizza I know and that's why I don't want your rushed. Let you know last Pizza get back to the talk from the 1980s the Mexa melt will be returning is it gonna be called the latinx melt

Yeah, it's gonna be called the next melt from the 90s the beef Gordita supreme remember Gorditas I don't even know what those are called the La Tink Smelt. From the 90s, the beef gordita supreme, remember gorditas? I don't even know what those are, but I remember them. Gorditas were like the, the only way to get the gordita now is they still have the cheesy gordita crunch, but that's a gordita inside.

No, it's a gordita on the outside with a crunchy taco inside. Okay, now I get it. I love the cheesy gordita crunch. All right. And from the 2000s, Dick, a beloved dessert favorite, the caramel apple empanada will be returning.

Ugh. Talkable says they want to bring the whole lineup to menus nationwide later this year for a limited time and while supplies last. Yeah. So guys, all your favorite top. None of this sounds good, by the way. I guess I would have more.

You know what the hipsters, because I miss when America had one shared menu. You could see your cousins in Nebraska, or you could meet some weirdo in New York, and you all have McDonald's. You all have the same thing to eat. And now it's just hipster shit everywhere. And everyone has to constantly explain

what hipster shit that's so fascinating to them that they have in their neighborhood. They've got to pick a couple to have it every one. We've got the Detroit pizza. We got the Nashville hot chicken. We got everything. Yeah. It's a waste of time.

It is complicated. It's weird. There's too many pop ups coming around. Well, all I can say, guys, discontinued food fake outs is currently number 673 with negative 99 votes, because all my food problems get downvoted but why don't you guys if you're excited to see your favorite Taco Bell items returning.

Although all this sounds terrible I'll eat one of these apple empanadas. I think I remember that being okay but I don't want a tostada. Well that's too bad. You're gonna have to eat one. For this show you're gonna have to eat one. You know what it would be a good video if I got one of each and I just hated all of them. Why don't you do, here, why don't you do this? Why don't you do one Star Wars video and then one food video.

Can I combine the two? They all combine. Don't get those Star Wars Oreos, then I can do both. Do a Star Wars, a video that starts Star Wars and then slowly start turning it into a food video so that by the end you're just talking about food. Have you seen those Star Wars Oreos where like, they're either red or blue and you don't know until you open it? Or did you get the dark side or the light side? But you can see in the side of the Oreo.

Well not from the package. Oh, it's the whole one is red or blue? The whole package is either red or blue. Can you see it in the cookie? Well people then checked underneath and they said, oh there's actually a code on the package that tells you yeah you tricked them you fucking nerds they got you whatever this food crowd Nabisco yeah that'll teach them that'll teach them fascinating stuff well here's one I think everybody can get behind this might be I forget who brought this in from episode 80, The Homeless.

Probably me. Probably you. Yeah, get rid of him. Well, guys, the homeless may not be a problem much longer as the homeless death rate continues to rise. Give him some fentanyl. Well. Shhh.

New stats have come in from Utah, which has been tracking the death rate of the homeless, which is currently 10 times higher than the general population. They found three primary reasons why homeless people die. And I want to see if Dick can figure them out. Three? The top three? Drugs?

On the board. Drugs? Hold on, hold on. Drugs? Let's see. Let's go to the board. Go On the board. Drugs? Hold on, hold on. Drugs? Let's see. Let's go to the board. Go to the board. Number one answer was drugs with 35%.

I don't have the ding ding. I don't have those. But you have the song. You have the song. Well, I have that, but I don't have the let's go to the board or ding ding. I just have that. Yeah, but that's pretty good. At least you got that.

Drugs. Are we going to get copyright struck for this? Probably. Drugs. Wow, drugs is number one on the board with 35%. Murder is number three on the board. Accidents, suicides, and homicides. Uh, sepsis. Sepsis.

What is sepsis again? Like, infected wounds. I can't give it to you. I can't give it to you. Well, no, I can't give it to you. What is sepsis again? Like, infected wounds. I can't give it to you. I can't give it to you. Well, I can't give it to you. What is it? It is chronic diseases. Okay, I guess not. Heart disease and diabetes accounts for

33% of deaths. So, the homeless are eating good. They're getting diabetes. Eating all that sugary snacks. The average age of death among the homeless was 56, which is 16 years younger than the general population. So pretty old for homeless. That's pretty good. You got the top, you got two of the three.

I was pretty close. You were pretty close. You were pretty close. Is that all you have to vote it up? That's all I got from the vote it up. Dick missed the show again. And the calling show just didn't stop But I'm way up

When you're doing the rest When you're doing the rest Fucking song. Fucking Green Day. Ah, here's my problem is communism. No, no. No, communism's good. Everybody gets a little. Everybody gets a little bit. Everybody gets a piece of pie, right? Nobody gets a big old pie. Nobody gets a big old pie.

Everybody gets a little bit of pie. I like that you're at least honest about it. I like some communism. There's not such a thing. You know, just a little bit. Just a little bit. Get little bit a little more get a little more you get a little more You know I Was uh I was reading how much communism reading animal farm again recently. Oh, yeah great book. Yeah You ever read that one? No never read animal farms you watch the the show or the the movies any of the movies

There's a movie about animal animal they made it anymore Clarkson's farm. No no no you should watch the animated animal farm No, I'm not watching that shit It's about calm you know I already know it's bad. I don't need a fucking cartoon Yeah, but it's explain it to me. I need a ninth grade book. Oh wow what a fucking fascinating book This is it's an interesting little fable. It's it's... Explain it to me. I don't need a ninth grade book. Oh wow, what a fucking fascinating book this is. It's an interesting little fable. It's interesting. What did you take away from it? That it's great if only those pigs wouldn't have gotten off there. If only Napoleon hadn't killed Snowball, we would have had a...

Who the fuck is that? Napoleon would be Stalin, and I believe Snowball was... What's the other guy? Are these animals you're talking about or they pigs They're pigs so they're actually pigs in the book. You don't know animal farm at all. No, I don't know this retarded shit I don't know about cartoons telling lessons All cartoons teach lessons I don't watch those kinds of farm is about it's a farm full of animals. It's an actual animal farm and Jesus Christ they kick out all the humans aka the animals do yeah, they kick out the Russian royalty

What you know been being in a Russian royalty or is it a metaphor? It's all a metaphor the whole thing stop mixing up the metaphor. It's like I some okay So they kick out farmer Bob or whatever the fuck it is And they take Ivan sure okay, and they take over the farm and they go well all the animals will work for the animals We'll pretty yeah, how does it go they eat each other? There's some funny stuff. It's just funny I think it's gonna be pretty funny I think it's the crows who like the pigs are like everybody you got to keep working to the crows go Yeah, keep working cuz right over the hills there's a place called

Sugar Candy Mountain and you go there when you die and there's just magic candy that you eat forever and they're like, hey will you shut the fuck up about Sugar Candy Mountain, there is no Sugar Candy Mountain. Just say, you don't need all that shit, just say communism is for and then F-slurs. That's the book, right there.

It's just a fun little take on all of the communist stuff. Yeah, how much do you think we need you think? You think all that food you think all taking all the foods a good idea? Taking all the food. What do you find wiping it out fine taking all saying no more food you guys got a star I don't think no, I don't agree with that. You don't agree with that. No, okay. I got you on that one at least Taking your house. What do you think about that one? Taking your house. Taking people's houses? See I was going through this thinking well this beetle will definitely see this is bad but I was like well taking people's houses I bet you would like that.

It's not so much taking people's houses but I agree in a government housing I think there should be more of it. More of it? Well there should be more we should build more you know houses. We should who the, you know, houses. We should. Who? The government? Probably the government shouldn't own them at this point. Should they build them?

They should provide huge subsidies to private industry to build them. Have you ever been to projects, to project housing? I have driven past the project housing. I have not gone into it. Would you want to live there? No. Okay. Other people could live in that shit. Project housing I've not gone into it Okay other people could live in that Chinese apartments though those Chinese apartments Well not the ones in the ones in China that are not falling apart But some of the ones closer to like the nice city center, I guess that's the problem isn't it? You don't know when they're gonna fart start falling over. Yeah, yeah dead because of communism. Wow. Wow, how many are dead because of capitalism?

None. None. 50? How many do you think? You think it's more than a hundred million? See, I hate that. You think it's more than a hundred million? I think it's probably equal. What are you talking about? EEEEH! WHAT?! Equal! They're not dead because of communism. Uh, sorry, they're dead from starvation. Yes. And being killed. And exterminated.

Mostly starvation, I believe. Yeah, yeah. That's pretty bad. How many people has capitalism killed with starvation? Probably less. How much less, you think? Probably infinitely less, but most... It's hard to quantify. Look, here's the thing, is that why would communism cause famine?

Uh, cause retards are deciding where to grow food and how much. But that's not a tenet of communism. Communism does not say in its, uh... Retards are in charge? Yeah, it does not say retards have to be in charge. That's what communism is, retards are in charge. No, that does not say retards. That's what communism is retards are in charge No, that's not part of it. Okay. I'll tell you a retards in charge in every government system I'm not in charge of food farmers are in charge of food. Yes farmers should be in charge of food Okay, but it's not a communist policy that farmers can't be in charge of food. It's not

In any communist doctrine the communist manifest manifesto it does not say cards that I have yes I've read the cut it's like ten pages have you read it I don't think you have yeah okay I don't even think it's ten pages I think it's like five pages a pan no it's long the communist manifesto is like so yeah it's like I think it's like 40 pages five pages dude it's like 12 pages. It's not five pages. Dude, it's like 12 pages. The whole point was to- Get the hell out of here. The whole point was to distribute it to like, idiot farm workers who don't read.

You know, here's the Communist Manifesto. You get whatever you want, you don't have to work. Or actually, you do have to work, but not as much for some reason. Yeah. Central power- Here's the tenets of communism, since you don't seem to know what you're talking about. Centralization of power in the hands of the Communist Party. Sure. So retards right there. Right. Centralization of power right there and the other one. Do you know what caused the Chinese famine? They can't see where they planted the crops. That's a big part of it.

You nailed it right on the head. I planted so much rice here of it. You nailed it right on the head. I planted so much rice here last year. You nailed it right on the head. I can't print the rice. I can't see no more. The problem- I wrote it down here but I cannot read. The problem was just like idiot agrarian practice, okay, based on not understanding farming.

Oh, they didn't understand it. I think most of the world didn't completely understand it at the time. Like a lot of our modern agricultural practice has only been developed within the last 50 years. So it would go okay now? What happened in China was they had the four, what is it called, the four pests. Do you know any of this? No, you don't. Pests? Yeah, Joy Behar, Elizabeth Hasselbeck, Whoopi Goldberg, and McCain's daughter, the fat one. McCain's daughter, Meghan McCain. They kill them over, ahhh! The four pests.

The Chinese said, listen, we have to enact a policy, we need to get rid of, what was it, like locusts? Get rid of locusts by bombing them. Well, it was like different pests, the pests that attacked the green. But one of them was sparrows. Right, kill them too. They said, we need to kill all the sparrows. Yeah, so retards. So Chinese school children were throwing rocks at sparrows,

killing the native sparrow population. And what they didn't realize was the sparrows eat the other three. Right. So getting rid of the sparrows, like, fuck them. And so if you were a guy, if you were farming, you're like, I think you should not kill the sparrows. They're like, kill that guy. He's saying shit that we don't agree with. I don't think there was farmers saying, like, I think they didn't.

There's always somebody saying, I don't think that's right. But I'm just saying it's not comm, there's no part of communism now or ever that says you have to kill all the sparrows. It's just poor agricultural practice. It's not related. Well, the problem is when somebody says, I think that's a bad idea, they go, you got to kill, you kill that guy. You could make that argument. Sure. That's the argument. But if you would need, you would need an example of a guy who said, don't kill the sparrows.

And they said, murder him. They killed him. They killed like millions. They put, what do you think the gulag is? I don't think that's true. I think that people were just like, yeah, I don't know. It makes sense. The sparrows are eating the crabs. And you think everybody was like that? There wasn't anybody that said don't know makes sense the sparrows are eating the crabs That's okay. You think everybody was like that there wasn't anybody that said don't kill the fucking spare okay, so under cat under Capitalism we said hey, we got a what were they spraying for with the DDT right? Yeah, it's the same shit We're gonna stop doing that yeah eventually you go shit. We fucked up you figure out that's capitalism. Oh shit We've been messing under communism

They eventually realized we got to stop kill everyone dies in communism. That's the problem, but what is the difference? Why does this system does the lawsuit? Yes, lawsuit solves Pretty much everything okay collectivization of agriculture. That's that's the first thing in communism. That's bad Oh, it's bad because as we learn and you can't really convince you can't get peasants to uh, They just can't learn farming. Would you like the government to tell you how to build a magic deck? Would you like the government to say you gotta have you gotta have 40 mana at least or 10 mana? The big you have 10 man

The big problem with communism is the biggest problem with liberals is believing all men are Created equal which is clearly incorrect a lot of people are very stupid. Oh, is that from your book? No, are you sure I've heard that kind of a phrase like that from your book all men are created equal Now that animal farm book that you were talking about and old farm Oh, yeah, they do have their state control of the media and education, huh? Do we have that state control of the government and educate them in Britain? They're not communist Really? Yeah, they got the British News Network. You gotta pay for a TV license to fucking watch If they catch you watching TV who gets arrested

Who arrests you the government the government because they control all of the media and in Britain education That's not right. What do you mean? That's what that's the oh she's a Form of communism fair enough suppression of religious beliefs yes, okay That's sugar candy mountain man. It's gonna fuck it Nobody's gonna work hard if they're thinking about sugar candy man classless a classless society where all all people are equal We think about that. That's we're definitely doing that right people are equal. I don't know I was gonna bring in Kamala's price gouging grocery stores, or I don't even follow that well

She says that we got a limit the price of of like chips and sugar and stuff at the grocery store because they're price gouging us. The people making the meat. Well, they are price gouging us. That's the problem. Grocery stores are not price gouging anybody. Maybe not the grocery stores, but the manufacturers of the food. I think the grocery stores are price gouging. Why?

Because they make like no money. You could just go across the street if you want cheaper groceries I thought that the grocery I mean why would Amazon buy Whole Foods if not grocery like huge money in it Whole Foods is like for rich whores Where it's too lazy to leave the house so they get like delivered stuff to the house Pretty sure grocery stores are doing good, but this is your problem Grocery stores are like barely eking by. This is one of those things.

The skin of their teeth. This is one of those things where I wish you had like some stats. They make 1% profit. Grocery stores. 1% profit in grocery stores. What about Walmart? I saw that one tossed around too. They're price-couching. So Walmart's not making money? Barely any. Percentage-wise. Why are there so many fucking Walmarts, man?

Capitalism is why. All right, that's my problem. What, do you have a rebuttal for the communist side? Oh, the price gouging. But there is price gouging going on right now. Because basically, the American consumer has no money ability to we have no collective like will to just go well I'm not going to spend all the I don't know maybe it will maybe it'll work itself out if less people are eating out and whatever else okay it just hasn't manifested

itself yet people have just kind of accepted what do you think is being price gouged? They're just going, we've realized that the consumer, I mean all of this is a constant race to find out, you know, and it always has been, but now you have more tools to figure out what is the absolute maximum you can get someone to pay for a certain thing. Yeah. I was actually going to bring this in and I wish I had because now I can't remember Yeah, you think the grocery stores are doing that for like milk. What's the most we could get these fuckers to pay for them? I think they're doing it for every item. They probably have you know stats across the board. I'm sure target I'm gonna jet where they're all in a race. I'm gonna jack up this milk price to these fuckers

Well, if you could get an extra dollar for a gallon of milk Why would you not because the guy across the streets selling it for not? Because the guy across the street's selling it for less. But the guy across the street will match your price. OK, so here's the art. Together. They're going to match it together. Yes. Just for fun?

No, because collusion is great. When industries can collude on price, price fixing is a way to make a shit ton of money, which is why it's illegal. But. So they're going to break the law. Target. No, but there's new.

Will you let me fucking tell this news article I read, okay? Where'd you read it? Any time. DOS, but Comrad. Every time I try to say anything. Communist Monthly, where'd you get it? Communist Monthly. Uh-huh.

So there is an app that landlords can go to to find out what to price their units at. And they'll say, well, for your area, here's the recommended rent price. And this is because they're collecting data from all these different landlords or whatever else. So it would be illegal for all these landlords to get together and go, listen, we're only going to rent at $1,500. That's going to be the minimum floor. Nobody's going to rent below that. That's illegal. That's price fixing.

But if you go through an app that is just aggregating all the data and going, well, we're just suggesting that you charge this much, it's not price fixing. Yeah, that would be the same as just going around and using your eyeballs. I don't know. No, because the- What do you mean no?

Well, because I think that there's stuff in the app where like it was saying you'll get booted off the app if you do rent below the like price floor where they're like, listen, you're fucking things up for all of us. Oh, so then your stuff will rent right away. Yeah, it'll rent right away. Okay, so problem solved.

Well, no, because then you get kicked off the app. The app is like forcing you into adhering to this price floor. So people are so lazy, they can't, they could only rent through the app? No, it's not that renting through the app, it's an app telling you how much to price your stuff for. And then if you rent it for below that,

you get kicked off the app. Something like that. And that's happening with milk? I think with milk, you probably have, I mean, let's be clear, if it doesn't have to be across things, it can just be every Target sells the milk for that. Every Target does sell the milk.

Right, and I'm saying, yes, you might be able to get milk cheaper down the road, but the Target knows you're coming in for the convenience of the Target shopping experience, and they're gonna try and price that milk as high as it can go. What? It's just, ah.

Of course, see, it's not related to whatever. I mean, that's just products, I guess. Yeah, that's products. We gotta jack these milk products. What about pizza? What about a pair of Nike sneakers? Can we get $200? Can we get $500?

Yeah, that's Nike. I mean, that shit's a brand. It's not shoes. Shoes are nothing. I'm just saying that a lot of businesses are using, you know, they're using COVID as an excuse. They're going, well, you know, price of production has gone up on this and this. It has.

No, but not, not to the rate at which they're, they're turning the prices up. Oh, so rent hasn't gone up? The rent, the rate at which they're increasing the prices on the goods is not in direct proportion to their production costs. What's the proportion? I don't know. I don't have that data in front of me. But you know that they're doing it. Yes, absolutely. not in direct proportion to their production cost. What's the proportion? I don't know, I don't have that data in front of me. But you know that they're doing it.

Yes, absolutely, 100%. It's not my problem, I don't have stats in front of me. What do you want me to do? It's communism. Do you want me to get a little info pewter? No, no, no, I don't need any stats, it's the ideology. It's only the ideology part that I have a problem with. Everything that you're saying. Well, universal. It's the ideology. It's only the ideology part that I have a problem with everything that you're saying

Well universal basic income is I know that you agree. I know that you want more universal income. It's fucking crazy But okay, that's my problem more welfare more you ready for bread lines, but RFK like we're fine now No, the line you don't get any bread the bread's just to get you in line everybody's in the bread We're all talking about bread in the line talking about bread you're gonna get that day talking about red actually you I'm excited for that bread I wonder how good that bread is gonna be come back tomorrow you'll get to talk to a lot of Russians a lot of Russians say you know I miss the bread lines we had fun yeah kids are around, everybody's eating bread. I think that's a Seinfeld bit.

Is it? I don't know. Here's my problem, Dick. You know how sometimes people die? Yeah. And you're like, oh, that's sad. It's not sad forever. At a certain point, you kind of got to move along.

But some people will not move along. What are you making with your hand? What are you doing that's not this show? You're making little balls with your hand with your paper, thinking about God knows what. What are you doing? My problem dick is Robin Williams death posting. Still? You want to head on over to my Twitter real quick? Oh that's what's been happening.. It seems like every week for some fucking reason, I go, it's sad Robin Williams died, I get it. At any point, can we stop reposting the same five quotes and the same three inspirational stories?

Yeah, okay. Okay. Thank you Robin Williams. It's always every week somebody feels the need to remind me that Robin Williams is dead. And that he said some stuff that is not nearly as profound as people seem to think it is. Okay? Okay. Here we go.

Today marks five years since we last Robin Williams. Oh my God. Remember Mrs. Doubtfire, remember? Yeah, that was a weird, it's a weird movie. Remember Good Morning Vietnam, which was critically panned and nobody actually likes it that much. Remember Hook which is not a very good movie. It was the Genie.

Yeah. You hang out with Matt Damon and then he played a cancer doctor with a funny clown nose. Yeah those were good movies. They're fine. There's a lot of actors who make good movies. Who cares, what's the point? Let's fine. There's a lot of actors who make good movies. Who cares?

What's the point? Let's see. Why are you posting so many things about Robin Williams? I think the saddest, here's a Robin Williams quote, I think the saddest people try their hardest to make people happy because they know what it's like to feel absolutely worthless and they don't want anyone else to feel like that. Yeah. Did you know during the height of America's homelessness crisis, Rob Williams testified about homeless people. Oh, man. Here's the, I used to think the worst thing in life

was to end up alone, but it's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone. Do you remember when he was friends with a monkey? Do you remember this? Yeah, I remember this. And they died and they told the monkey that he was dead. Yeah. And the monkey with sign language said, I'm sad. Isn't that profound? Isn't that incredible? That bitch didn't know any sign language. I don't know what it is about Robin Williams, but it's gotten to the point where,

you know, his daughter on Twitter is like, can you guys stop reminding me that my dad is dead? It doesn't help me at all. She has posted numerous times on Twitter. Did you see there was a guy who made a, they made like a short film and it was an actor who did a good Robin Williams impression. It was him finding out John Belushi died of drugs and it's a so it's basically a video of

Robin Williams preparing to go on stage for Mork and Mindy and he's just sobbing because John Belushi's dead Okay, and everybody said I know what I'll do I'll send this to Zelda Williams and say hey have you seen this short film of your dead father? Sobbing like a baby. Why is she on Twitter? I? Just block your close your account She eventually had to send she eventually had to say guys Are you retarded like I don't need a thousand of you to send me a video of a guy pretending to be my dead dad It's not helpful. Well as a guy pretending to be not. It's not actually him. It was an actor portraying him.

And they're going, oh, isn't this incredible? Isn't this a great tribute to your dad? He's like, I don't want to fucking watch this. Why would I want to fucking watch this? What's wrong with you people? Will you get over my dad being dead? It's not nearly as interesting or important as you seem to think it is.

Yeah. So what is interesting? People should be doing instead of... It's just I don't know why I constantly, when I go on my feet, it goes, you know what is interesting? That people should be doing instead of- It's just, I don't know why I constantly when I go on my feed it goes, you know what Robin Williams- You know Robin Williams? I never see any Robin Williams posting

You don't see any Robin Williams posting? I see it every fucking week! Him and Anthony Bourdain are like the two guys Why do you get so much suicide shit on your timeline? I don't! Maybe I'm just getting targeted ants. Yeah! It's just that- I just get whores as fake tits. And then you go- first of all, as we always say, he probably died of autorotic asphyxiation.

Cause that's like 90% of suicides. Who? Rob Williams. Who? No, he did not. Probably. You don't know? You weren't there! Yeah, I know. If it happened, they wouldn't tell you! No, he died- he had like a degenerative brain condition. Yeah, that made him jerk off in a closet with a rope around his neck. That caused his lip.

Okay, it was autoerotic asphyxiation. Let's be real. I think you're jealous. Why? Because he's like what you wanna be. You wanna be like That's a terrible Robin Williams impression all robberies impressions are bad cuz he was a bad comedian I don't think you could do three jobs in a row

Okay, uh-uh-uh, that's not a joke. I don't think you could say three sentences You know Robin Williams just stole jokes constantly you know he good fucking comedians comedians are so fucking Precious about all their jokes that anytime they have to say one they preface it with this is a joke that I tell like What what do you want a red carpet to roll? This is a joke I used to have in my act. Who the fuck cares? Just make the comment. He would burn other people's fucking material He'd go on Johnny Carson. Burn material. He would. People have been telling the same knock-knock jokes for two thousand years Some jokes are unique and original and Robin was stealing them and using them on fucking- Jealousy! It's jealousy. Okay, go ahead. Do a Robin Williams impression.

Good morning Vietnam! It's a sentence. Okay. You are truly the dead poet society. Hey Will, why you always hunting Will? What are you hunting over there Will? Now you're not even doing the voice though? I think you're jealous of him not for the comedy, but because he killed himself Yeah, I could I could get in on that yeah like I'm just saying at a certain point

I don't need to see you. You know he was friends with a monkey and the monkey was sad Do you know that monkey you know that everyone suffers from depression? Not they don't Robin Williams if Robin Williams can suffer from depression. What does that say about depression? I don't fucking know I don't care imagine being Robin Williams and being that funny and you know one is ever funny No, cuz you're like every time they start talking you can see like oh god. Yeah, I like some look I like some Robin Williams stuff. I get it, some of it's good. You like Aladdin? Yeah. Do you always point out to people

like the sex stuff in Aladdin? No, I don't actually. You don't really? That one line when they get on the carpet is a little weird. I don't know if they took that out. And then they gotta tell the story about, you know, Disney really fucked over Robin Williams because he said he didn't want merchandise made of his kids. He didn't want his images used to sell fast food to

children and then they made a McDonald's toy of the genie. He's very upset. He didn't get enough royalties and then he got a degenerative brain disease and he killed himself. And I don't say that part though. Anyone can suffer from depression. It was a rope. It was a rope and he was jerking it and that's fine. Why does it upset you so much? If people were quoting you like they quote him, you would love it. Actually you'd probably even act even more sad. If I was dead I'd be happy.

I can't believe they're quoting me. It's just like, I don't know what the obsession is with that guy's death. I don't get it. Well, cause they think he's like, they had it all and it's fun. And then he killed himself. He had it all and he was fun. Yeah That's why. So what is what is having an ugly girl? You're successful. Yeah, yeah family So I have a rich guy kills themselves. It's more interesting. I guess. Yeah, anything that rich people do is better

Can we understand that more important most rich people are equally Miserable no a rich person does not have a smoke alarm chirping in their house every 20 seconds. Sure, not equally miserable, but still has the propensity for misery. Also human beings are- No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. They're living much better. Much better lives.

They're definitely living much better. Rich people, yeah. Yeah. Living better. Still, they can experience loss. They can, yeah. Yeah. Living better. Still, they can experience loss. They can feel bad. Yeah. Their brains can rot away or whatever the fuck.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you got? What are you building here? I'm making a little snowman. Jesus. You're really digging into it today. What do you got? Just rolling a little thing.

What are you going to do with them? Well, you know, I take them and I leave them in places and then maybe I find them again. Yeah? And then I just leave them. So Robin Williams posting? A little trinket. Robin Williams death posting. Okay.

If I ever have to see a quote about, oh, you know, I thought being lonely was not havin' it's people who make you lonely. That's true, though. Remember when I was in that movie, I gotta find my wife in hell and it doesn't even fuckin' make any sense? Yeah. What dreams will come, huh? He's wife in hell and it doesn't even fucking make any sense. Yeah.

What dreams will come, huh? He's not Kermit. Anytime he tried to make like a movie that was like profound, it was just fucking stupid. Yeah. Good Will Hunting. What if a gay kid killed himself? Good Will Hunting was great. Oh, not Good Will Hunting. Dead Poets Society. I didn't see that one.

That was the one where, I think, was the kid gay? Or maybe he was just sad. I don't know. And then he hangs himself. Good Will Hunting was well that's only good cause of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon doing Boston stuff. No, they're annoying

in that movie. Yeah, exactly. They're from Boston. It was 100% accurate. How about them apples and that body, yeah? He calls him Chief. You ever see the SNL sketch where Casey Affleck goes to a Dunkin' Donuts? No. Everyone in Massachusetts watches that and they go, this is the most accurate sketch

you ever made about Massachusetts. What happens? It's just Casey Affleck going, yeah, go to Dunk's, get a, I got the app right on my phone. He holds up like an iPhone 2 and the screen's all cracked to a million places and he's smoking parliaments. See, this is why the suicide posting is so important though. Yeah. Because I'm sitting here wishing I was dead before you're done describing an SNL scene.

It's one of the only good SNL skits. But I persevered. It's one of the only good ones. And I'm thinking like, man, I wish I had a Robin Williams quote to feel something. If Casey Affleck actually molested all those women, he gets a pass. Because that's a Boston boy. Molesting women? That's what you call it? Whatever Casey did. Well, kids.

Casey Affleck did not molest kids. No, you say molest kids. You didn't say molest women. I mean, that's doing... you're doing someone dirty if you say molested women. There's a reason it's called a child molester, not a molester. Well, if you call someone a molester, people are gonna think it's a kid. I don't think it's a kid. I think it's a molester. She got molestered. I think that's a problem. It might be a problem. I don't know. Yeah, well, Well, I would think- like if you really molested that cake.

Well, you can molest a cake. You can molest a lot of things. I don't think that's a good idea. OK, is that your problem? Sure. Robin Williams posting. Yeah, death posting. God forbid anyone have a real... Celebrate the life of a... God forbid anyone have a real emotional reaction to anything. It's just like, but it's never like anything unique.

It's never like, oh, I was thinking about this particular scene in the movie. It's the same five quotes and the same three stories. Did you know he was friends with the monkey? Did you know he was friends with the monkey? Yeah, I know he was friends with the monkey. I don't care. You got anything new to say about this fucking guy? Did you see this video when John Belushi died?

Yeah, I saw it. I haven't seen that video. You want to watch it real quick? No I don't wanna watch this shit. You don't wanna watch Robin Williams and the Mork and Mindy? I don't want this stuff on my timeline. I don't have it. Well you know what it's probably cuz I watched that video once now I'm gonna get it for the rest of my life cuz I watched a guy put that video on and cry. Oh yeah. Okay, my problem is lag. Mm-hmm. Been playing a lot of GTA online. Why? Because I got really into it over the summer

You're gonna do GTA on five GTA five and then I just found out at the end of summer that they have online It was like oh shit. We fired this up doing the online Just get killed because of lag apparently You're doing great and then all of a sudden you're shooting at a guy I wanted to do that I have wanted to do those bank heist missions in the online. Have you done any of those? Yeah, also killed by lag. Sitting there, running around, and then,

plk, exploded, dead, done. That's how they get you. Yeah, that is how they get you. You haven't tried it at all? No, I don't know. I haven't done a lot of online gaming in a while. Too busy. Well, I don't wanna hang out with 10 year olds,

is mostly it. Half the people you're playing with on GTA Online are 10 years old, Dick. It's impossible, because they're doing better than me. There's no way they're 10 years old. I know for a fact the guy I was playing with last night is not 10, because he's an adult black man. He's an adult black man, who's saying the N-word.

Some of those children have very deep voices. No, no, no, no, no. he's an adult black man. Who's saying the N- Some of those children have very deep voices these days. No, no, no, no, no. He was an adult. It's all those kids, they go, what do you want for Christmas? Shark cash? I want shark cash! What's shark cash?

Shark cash is the GTA fake money. You don't have your shark cash? What? No. I just have normal, I don't do buying stuff in the game. I think that's the like in-game currency. It's not, it's shark cash. It's just money. It don't do buying stuff in the game. I think that's the the like in-game currency It's not it's sharkish money. It's not it doesn't say shark cash. It just says a dollar sign what the fuck is shark cash

I don't know look up shark cash. No, I'm gonna look at how you can't you to resist to resist You know the immediate the impulse to immediately satisfy yourself is totally impossible. To no information. What does this bring to the show? Looking up shark cash. Shark cash is king in this town. You can buy shark cash cards for PC. Again, you can get $600,000 if you buy a $10 shark cash card. How does this help the conversation of the show?

Because I want to make sure I'm not crazy. You just, oh yeah, I gotta look it up. Is there anything I can look up? Well, cause you just told me it's not shark cash, but it is shark cash. I don't know what the fuck this- what is this? Buy shark cash cards? Cash is king. What is a shark cash card? I think it's if you want more money in GTA, technically you're purchasing a credit card of shark cash is what they said. Who gives a fuck?

I just want to make sure I'm using the right terminology. You're not, you're still not. it's just cash. That's a shark card See that well, I'm asking if you've purchased any shark cards and apparently no no well I just have cash, and you're never gonna be able to buy the now. What are you playing? I have a leftover pieces of medicine Look at that for you a fidget spinner or something. Check out the back of the foil though, that is pretty cool. Alright, it's lag. That's my problem is lag. There you go.

I've been getting lag, uh, you know you can stream your PS5 to your PS4? What? So I have the PS4 set up in my bedroom and I have the PS5 set up next to my computer, but I can use the PS4 to stream gameplay from my PS5. You're fucking kidding me really? Yeah, so that way I there's no way that works. It works Okay, but occasionally I'll get a little bit of like a disconnect. You know, what do you play on it? I'm playing Final Fantasy 7 and then I'll be hitting guys and all of a sudden cloud stops moving I go on that lag that monster There you go gonna murder the shit out of me in the next ten seconds

And then I come back and clouds dead. I'm like god damn did it you're streaming video games from your streaming video games from one room of my house to another room of my house it works I could run a cable I guess but now I don't have to run a cable yeah but it doesn't work it's working okay it's where it works like 90% of the time it works every time and then they quit on you and then they quit on you. And then they quit on you. Because your lag sucks and you get killed. You can do it on your PC too, you know you can do that.

What? You can stream your PlayStation to your PC, you can be playing in bed. On my what? I don't have any video games on my bed. You don't have a laptop? I'm gonna sit in my bed playing a game on my laptop for my...

You can use your controller. In bed? Yeah, what do you mean? I don't have video games in my bed. You know what I'm saying, if you ever wanted to relax in bed and earn some shark cash, you can stream your PlayStation on your laptop. How the fuck is that gonna work? What do you mean how's that gonna work?

How the fuck am I gonna set up a laptop, what in the bathroom? On the floor? Wherever you wanna be. And then I'm playing it? You could be outside on that nice patio you got. That I could do, yeah. Yeah, you could set it up and you could stream it out there. See, look, immediately you go, okay, well that'd be nice. Well that, but not in bed.

What am I gonna play? You ever grab like a Game Boy and play Game Boy in the bed or the Switch or something? No! I'm going to bed to sleep. You don't ever Gameboy in the bed or the Something I'm gonna bed to sleep you don't you don't ever Read a book you ever read a book in bed. Yeah, read a book. Yeah, okay So you know that you can get I'm not gonna play video games on my laptop with a controller Lazy to be laying in bed playing on a video game. You lay back and read the book Why don't you sit in a chair like a gentleman? Jeez? Gosh, it's way too lazy. Everyone listening to this has played video games in bed. You're a psychopath. You shouldn't no no no no

You should be playing. Anybody with a switch. It's portable. I'm gonna balance it on my Girlfriend's back while she's sleeping. Oh, yeah, here we go Put it on her head. You're nuts You're nuts. How often you play video games in bed? Not often. I don't think I've ever played video games in bed. No, I don't know. I'm not playing. You gotta sit up I'm not playing a lot. Well, I play on my phone. I play I've been playing Magic Arena I was up till like 5 a.m. Playing Magic cards last night. Oh, I see. I got a new deck, and it is hot. I think I've broken this format wide open.

They got the store championships coming up. You want to go play Magic? Will you win some promo cards? What store? All the stores. All the stores that run Magic events are having these store championships, where you can win exclusive promo cards by participating.

No, I hate playing Magic. I've decided. Come on. It's just like, you gotta read all this shit every time. It's like flip the card over and use your reveal mechanic for two. There's not a lot of cycle cards anymore. Grave Cycle your vehicle, your grave rider.

All right, vehicles I get in pretty stupid. It's all fucking stupid man. Well now they have mounts instead of vehicles have you seen mounts? God can I put I gotta look the problem with magic is I gotta look up every card I gotta go to my phone and go MTG. No no no no you can't just read the cards like well Can I put a mount in a vehicle? I don't know Yeah, yeah, can you put a mount in a vehicle? Yeah you I put a mount in a vehicle I don't know yeah yeah can you put a mount in a vehicle yeah you can put a mount in a vehicle okay well you're not putting you're not putting any well technically can I load it in or not you're crewing the vehicle yeah you can crew the vehicle with a mount is it tapping to do this is it fucking tapping

the mount's a horse and the horse is an artifact that I equip suffer from summoning sickness too or is it just a creature with hazed like I don't know and then you do google it you're asking if equipment has summoning sickness if I is it just a creature with hazed? It's like I don't know. And then you do google it. You're asking if equipment has summoning sickness? If I attach it to a guy, yes, yes, sure. That's a good. No, equipment does not have summoning sickness. Does an artifact, can I put an artifact down and tap it? I don't know.

You can tap, artifacts don't have summoning sickness unless they're creatures. Only creatures have summoning sickness. It's just too much looking shit up. I don't know. Maybe I can. It's too complicated. Maybe I can guide you through it. That's the last thing in the world that I want. You want to go to Magicon in Vegas? Fuck no.

Could be fun, is it? I think it's in like a month or two. I might go. Okay. All right. Well, that's my problem. I have a bunch more lag shit, but I mean, honestly, I don't know what to do. All right.

I don't know. Is that it? No, I got to do a... Yeah. All right. I don't know. Is that it? No, I gotta do a, yeah, do one. All right. All right, here's my problem. You ever experience any sort of illness or sickness or tiredness or depression or anything? Is that what I'm seeing?

And you mention it to somebody. You go, ah yeah, I've been a little tired lately, or I haven't been sleeping, I've been getting the sniffles, anything. Okay. I'm getting headaches. Yeah. And there's good, you mentioned it to a friend,

and the friend goes, you ever try smoking weed? No. And my problem is guys who think marijuana is a magical cure all delivered to us from God when in reality it barely does fucking anything. Medical marijuana. And who tells me that?

Yeah, who tells me that? Who tells you that? To smoke weed? All the weed guys. They always go, oh, you know, I wasn't able to sleep, but I started taking the CBD gummies. Or I started smoking the weed and whatever else. And you're like, look, I'm sure it helps a little bit.

I'm sure I could just take sleeping pills. I'm sure there's like infinite actual fucking ways. Weed's better than sleeping pills. Sure sure depending on what kind of sleep you want, huh? I mean, I'd rather get prescription sleeping pills though. Those are useful the big Okay, there's all these videos and there's always these videos of a guy and you go come on you do it a bit right now And it's a guy videos of a guy, and you go, come on, you're doing a bit right now. And it's a guy, and he's going, oh, my seizures. Oh, my seizures.

And then he's spread sweet. And they give him a little bit of hash oil, and he goes, yeah, there you go, 100%. You're like, come on with this shit. I wish I would have done that before going online, pretended that I had seizures. Yeah. So I could just like seize out.

It's all good. You could develop them. Say you hit that ball real hard and your brain's finally all the brain bleeding. Especially with all the Matic stuff. I could have pretended to have seizures the whole time. Well everybody wants to pretend that weed is perfectly safe. It's the safest thing alive when weed actually has a variety of negative health effects. Heavy marijuana consumption is associated with clogged arteries and heart failure and may impact male fertility. Speaking of clogged, you clogged the upstairs toilet by the way.

No I didn't. Well, that's what I'm reading. Clogged? Clogged with toilet paper and the poop is still in there. Well, cause it wouldn't- I can't flush it twice. I flushed it once. And there was a little bit of whatever left over so I wiped it up and I just left that in there. I would have flushed it again when I went back up. There was some residue on the back of the toilet. What do you want me to do? You want me to leave it there? That's not what I'm hearing! That's not the reports that I'm hearing.

I... used the toilet. Did you open the window? No, I don't know there's a window in there. You're seeing what you're s- so you closed the door, you took closed the door you took a shit I closed the door and left the fan on So it didn't get out of the house That's a fan you have a fan in the bathroom. No, it's a heat lamp Why do you have a heat lamp in the bathroom to be hot and the cool more on the cold?

There's a fan in there. It makes a fan noise. That's to blow the heat around that's retarded. It's nice Okay, well now I know there's a window. There's a window. You can see it. That's retarded. That's nice! Okay, well now I know there's a window in there. There's a window, you can see it, there's no chance you didn't know there was a window there. Honestly, I can't remember there being a window in there. Okay. It's clogged with toilet paper and the poop is still there. It's not clogged, just press the thing again.

And the downstairs toilet is broken. I have nothing to do with that, I didn't use the downstairs toilet. Oh, you mean the seat that was broken the second I went in there? Yeah. I went in there and lifted it up and the entire toilet seat came up And you think I did that well no one else uses that toilet. That's the issue I asked you do what do you think I did I went in there? I ripped the toilet seat off for fun I went it's all me. It's the toilet seat is off. How would I break the toilet seat by peeing? I don't think you broke it this time. You think- so you think weeks ag- when?

I don't know. I never used that bathroom. Bro. I never used that bathroom. Okay, I don't know. Sean, who uses it? Sean doesn't use it? I don't know.

You've had people over- Sean doesn't sit on it. You just had a fucking pizza party. You shit. You come in shitting, like, 30% of the time you're here. I do not shit 30% of the time I'm here. I shit 10% of the time you're here. I do not shit 30% of the time I'm here. I shit 10% of the time I'm here. Okay.

One out of every 10 shows I might take a shit. So that's 10, that's 15 shits that you've taken here. Sure. And now the toilet seat is broken. And we don't know who broke it. Bro, I went in there and I went to lift it up so I could pee in the toilet. And it shattered. And the whole thing came up.

Yeah. And you're telling me, what did I do? With my herculean strength? I don't know! I ripped the toilet seat off. I definitely am not accusing you of having herculean strength. Somebody broke it. Didn't say anything.

Me? Who ever used it before I did? Who would have used it? You have people over here! You and your little buddies, and I'm not going gonna say what kind of medical marijuana users they are, but they're stumbling and bumbling around going, ooh, we're having so much fun, the dick smells good, and then they, ooh, I'm just gonna use the bathroom real quick. I'm just saying, you're the one that discovered that it was broken. Alright, Drunky McDrunkenstein, you probably were on a fucking bender and you ended up stumbling on it.

Well somebody did. Because it feels like an airplane bathroom, I don't like that one. I know, it's a terrible fucking toilet and I only use it out of Tommy boy. I use it out of respect I say I'll use the tiny shitty toilet And not pollute Dicks main master toilet. There's issues with I'm getting texts that there's issues with the toilet Why is there no bidet on that upstairs toilet? Ah? That would have solved your problem 100% you know why because I would have been able to ask I would have been able to ask blasts. I'm getting texts from other people about the shit

What do you mean other people? You mean one other person First of all if you were a gentleman and you had a bidet on that upstairs toilet I would have been able to ask I'm putting a bidet on a public company toilet Why? Why? Because it's presumptive

Presumptive of what? That I want to enjoy my bathroom experience? My open toilet is not for you to enjoy. It's to be used for urine. You should shit at home. I'm- I'm- I'm- This is unreasonable what you're asking. Shitting at home?

I'm tired of this anti-shitting propaganda. You can't shit at other people's houses. I'm gonna shit wherever the fuck I want, whenever I want. You can at least open a window. You can at least open a window. You're hot-boxing shit. If this is how you're gonna treat me, I'm gonna make it the most disgusting,

horrific fucking experience every time. It's hard to imagine it getting worse. Cause God forbid, I go in there, I leave the fan on I wipe it up lamp I take the toilet paper and I wipe it on the ceiling I make sure I leave no stains I make sure I leave no hair. Why am I getting to what am I getting text for? I can't flush the toilet twice the tank has to refill so wait okay next time I'll sit around when we're getting ready to do a podcast in two seconds Who cares you just go in and you hit it!

You hit it once! Who cares whose shit is in a toilet that's not yours? There's no shit! There was a tiny bit of residue left over that I cleaned up. There's not a log of shit in there. Clogged with toilet paper. Not clogged. And his poop is still in it. No, it's on the paper.

The paper had a tiny bit of residue left over that I wiped off. So you gotta get rid of the paper. You sit in there and keep flushing. Till it's gone. How is this new? You just hit the fucking plunger one more time. Who cares? The person who is not, who's shit it is not,

cares. I tried to flush it a second time, and I said, okay, the tank is obviously still refilling So you just like panic flushed so you knew something was wrong well that I started hitting it knowing that cuz everyone knows When the tank is full or not they know it's a pre they know it's a Pre I left a tiny bit of toilet paper in there because the the tank was not full so the toilet paper Covered the poop. There's no poop.

Could there have been a poop under the toilet paper? There's no... what do you call it? There's no log remaining. But could there have been? No, not at all. Under the toilet paper? No, no. So you know what's under the toilet paper.

So let me ask you this. How many fingers am I holding up? Let's pretend this is toilet paper okay sure floating in the bottom okay how many fingers am i holding up since you're the expert at seeing through toilet paper I'd like to court reporter to mark down go ahead figure it out

three wrong one it was always gonna be one you know she's gonna flush it the boys poop in it what do you mean the bowl has the times I'm getting reports the bowl has poop in it it's possible that one flake separated itself from the toilet paper but that is not a log that is not anything if I need to get an estimate? Go up there get an estimate. I get an estimate over the phone What would you estimate? Estimate the size of the remaining poop is there's no remaining poop. It's a flake

A flake is not poop, but it went from there's no poop to now. There's a flake. I said there was residue Okay It's the scattering hold on it's I'm getting dot dot dots Now there's a flake. I said there was residue. Okay? It's the scatterings. Hold on, I'm getting dot dot dots. It's a smear of poop. A smear is not poop. Okay, that's not poop. It's a smear, thank you.

All right. Okay, go ahead with your problem. I did my duty in more ways than one. Uh-huh, okay. Currently recreational cannabis is legal for adults over the age of 21 in 24 states. Home to whatever. And here's the thing that everyone's gonna tell you

is you know what's great about weed is it's an excellent pain killer is what they're gonna say. Yeah. You know all my pain, my chronic pain. Yeah. I couldn't deal with my chronic pain until I smoked weed. And now all my back pain's gone, all my pain my chronic pain. Yeah, I couldn't deal with my chronic pain until I smoked weed and now All my back pain's gone all my joints everything feels better dick ever heard of something called the placebo effect Yes, i've heard of that 20 studies including

1400 individuals age range between 33 to 62 Found that trials with low risk of bias had greater placebo responses. Pain intensity was associated with a significant reduction in response to placebo. So basically they said, hey, we're going to give you a weed medicine. Oh my God, recreational cannabis. What, CBD or weed? It was a variety of things. They gave them every... CBD doesn't do anything. Well, this was a scattered again.

They took multiple studies. So they went through, you know, like 30 different studies and they compiled them all together and they said based on these studies, it's just, it's a placebo effect. And you know why the placebo effect is so strong with people who smoke weed is because of all these fucking meteor. They literally said they're like, you know how you always see like news articles and say, smoking weed has been found to reduce pain So people hear that and their brain goes, oh my god

And then they smoke weed and they're like it works it works just like the news said Yeah, it works. The placebo effect works though. The placebo effect works. No, the placebo effect is very strong. The chiropractic is covered by your health insurance. But it's even stronger for people to smoke weed because of all the bullshit surrounding weed because people actually Yeah, like if you just give a guy a pill He's like, I don't know if it's gonna work and you go I'm gonna give you some weed and he goes Oh, I've heard about this. Yeah, and then his brain gets all amped up and he goes Yeah, this is gonna work cuz I read it. I saw a news report on it

Yeah, and the police see about effect is even stronger They talked to doctors and doctors go if it's not an opiate They're none of these painkillers matter at all Like the only ones that matter either you give a guy opiates or you don't the rest of it is just fucking bullshit there was a Kind of forget what they were testing for but the it was this happened like two weeks ago the the double blind whatever results were in on this Yeah, the the double blind whatever results were in on this

medical test this drug they were doing drug test and the drug was MDMA and it was let's test its efficacy on like depression or something or suicidal ideation no and The FDA threw out the they got results like the people who were doing ecstasy Didn't want to kill themselves nice. Yeah, so the FDA threw it out because they said, well, we don't, even though we gave you the requirements for this, we set out the steps for how this is going to work, we don't believe that it was a blind test. And they're like, oh, why? Like, well, because the people on ecstasy reported knowing that they were on Ecstasy. Well, yeah, I think you can figure it out, man.

Yeah, that's what it was. They're like, no, because the people that were on Ecstasy knew that they weren't in the control group. No shit, moron. How else can you test Ecstasy? What are you talking about? Yeah, then I guess we could never approve it. Right? Why did you make us do this? You didn't think that was going to be a problem? Well, no, because they figured out that, you know, once I started seeing cool shit and all the lights... Well, what can you do?

Again, so weed as a magical... Look, there might be like some... There's some therapeutic effects, but people seem to think it's like so fucking magical. And it's like, guys, it's just weed. It's so annoying that we had to go through this stupid back door of it being medicine just to make it legal.

That's a good point. It's like, yeah. It's medical marijuana. It's medical. It's not medicine. We don't have to say that anymore. We can just say we're doing it to get high. You don't need to say, although it worked.

My anxiety. Yeah, well, you know. Like ketamine, everyone's say... Although it worked! My anxiety! Yeah well yeah like ketamine everyone's doing like that's good for therapy that's good for therapy like LSD is good for therapy. Marijuana is only good for your fucking anxiety because it knocks you out you can drink a bunch of fucking heavy creamer and you'd probably get the same effects. This is gonna make you sit a little sleeper. Sleepy. Yeah, you're fucking yeah Medical what do you call me medical cocaine? Medical you think Nick's gonna get off. I've been taking medical cocaine. Basically that fucking Ritalin shit is real. I

Got my doctor to up the dosage of Ritalin. Yeah, she's a You got a woman doctor. It's a telehealth And you could tell she's always like I I got to, you got to act. You did this problem, drugs, doctors don't give you drugs or whatever. I never got a doctor to give me drugs ever. Well, cause you don't know how to play the game. You got to be pathetic,

which is something that comes very naturally to me. I see. Where I just go, gosh, you know, I just, sometimes I just run out of energy in the middle of the day and I don't. I don't I Don't know what's going on. That's true It is true, but you gotta you gotta you gotta put it on I go I just feel like if I I just feel like if I could focus you sound like you have more energy

Then you're pretending I go you know I go. I don't know I just I just feel like maybe you, if we up the dosage, like maybe I could focus a little bit more. Yeah. And the lady doctors, they go like, eh, we can make this happen. Yeah. I just get told that I shouldn't drink so much.

That's it. That's all that. Once I say alcohol, once I put alcohol out there, a woman doctor will never help you or give you anything. Because you don't know how to look or act pathetic. You got to go in there. As soon as they hear it, as soon as they hear man drinking, they think, I gotta fuck up his life.

I gotta fix him. Stop, like he's ruining his life. No man should ever be drinking beer ever. Well, you gotta go in there sweating. You gotta go in there disheveled. You know? Next time you accidentally cut off You do it. Next time I have a Teladoc

You do it. Next time you do a Teladoc I'll come in and I'll do it But I was gonna say remember when you shaved off your beard by accident? Yeah. Schedule a doctors appointment the next day. Go in looking like a fucking Schlub loser And you go, oh I don't know I just sit around and eat hot pockets And I don't know why I can't wake up in the morning.

No. I don't even know what I would want, though. Usually it's just Vicodin. What do I got? Well, they got this new, it's like, they got like slow release Ritalin. And like, you know, all day long, you get a little. So you're on that?

Yeah. Right now? No. I didn't take it today Oh, why not? Because I knew I was going to do a show and I didn't want to do a good job Hahahaha This isn't important to me at all

I'm saving those for work days This show doesn't matter What's work? What's work for you? Comics going good man Oh man Comics going good, we're making some YouTube videos you gotta do if you give if you give like a line item, you know of

Superkiller money raise taxes paid like artists paid like I got Save if you give a line item and and like a total amount of money raise you'd be a fucking hero Where like online? Why would I be a hero people want to know it'd be so funny What does a hundred thousand dollars sounds like so much? Yeah, and after all this shit? It's like well It doesn't help when I've paid a lot of guys for Canada not using one guy just stole three hundred dollars that sucks Who did that? I don't know if he stole it, but he just disappeared the guy who made the Ricky ritardo shirt I sent him $300 and he's gone. Who was it? I forget is I got away, but he made the shirt

No, no, no, but I sent him $300 to do super killer stuff. Oh, he's like he's like, yeah I just need the money now like I got to pay this bill or whatever. Yeah, sure. Whatever you mean You didn't ever he does good work and I sound my really I'm like I like that shirt But yeah, the shirts great, but it's not worth an extra three dollars. It's just showed it and went nowhere So he's gone. I don't know where the fuck he went. What was he gonna do for you? I was gonna help well I originally I paid him to do some extra pages, but then the main artist was like no No, I want to do those. I'm like okay. That's fine. Oh, man You get the feeling in all this that writers shouldn't be doing comics

and artists should? Yes. Yeah. I kind of get the feeling too. The feeling I get is I should have spent the last 20 years learning how to draw. Just draw your, like, whatever you draw.

I might do that for a different kind of thing. Yeah. Cause now you're just like telling artists what to do, and they don't care. It's complicated. Well, some artists are like, well, I don't want to do that because that's not my style or whatever else.

Yeah, right there. Yeah, done. You get into these little like, yeah, but I think it would be better if we did it this way. I remember reading comics as a kid. You look at the art, and then the words are there, and you're like, ugh, get away think it would be better if we did it this way. I remember reading comics as a kid. It's like, you look at the art, right? And then the words are there, and you're like, ugh, get away. Ugh.

I was not that way. I was the opposite. Ugh. I was the opposite. I like the words. Get this gay trash out of my cool comic book. Erase it. Scribble it out.

That was the image era of comics. That was the Liefeld era. What? When Rob Liefeld and Todd McFarlane were putting out Spawn and Youngblood and it all sucked. I don't know, I'm just talking about comics. I'm saying, but the art was cool. All comics, even like the old like 50s comics. I'm like, oh yeah, cool, yeah. Boom, yeah. Pow. Get these words out of here. Bang. Yeah, bang, pow, get out of here. I don't need that.

Get it out. Get it on. I just want to see the art, you know? Well, speaking of art, guys, don't forget, I did want to mention our friend of the show, Ethan Van Skyver, is selling action figures. Oh, Rainbow Brute? Yeah, I don't know if we missed the campaign, though, because I meant to bring it up ahead of time. So check out the Rainbow Brute action figure on Indiegogo.

Those look pretty cool. Yeah, they're cool. I love what everybody's making. We also got a new bonus episode, So check out the Rainbow Brute action figure on Indiegogo. Those look pretty cool. Yeah, they're cool. I love what everybody's making. We also got a new bonus episode, Biggest Problem in Card Games, at patreon.com slash biggest problem. And don't forget to vote on all the problems at biggestproblem.show.

Okay. What are our problems then? Lag, communism, and? Medical marijuana guys, and Robin Williams Williams death posting. OK. Go there. Just today I was wondering, why did that bit ever

where I said this show sucked, why did that ever stop? Why was I ever doing that bit? Wait, why did that bit stop? I was like, why was I doing that bit? I don't remember. Wait, are you saying this show sucks? No, I was just remembering that. At Propel of Nothing, I was just like,

why was I doing that bit? I don't know. Everyone was so upset about it. Okay, here's some. This is a good episode. We argued about who shit and what shit. Oh man. All right, here we go.

I take good care of your bathroom. I don't know what this is. You don't though. There's no reason to shit in other people's toilets. This is my place of work. I come in here. We do a, this is a company. You shit like that.

You shit like boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. So I'm gonna shit on company time. I'm the talent of the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Along with you, two pieces of talent. You don't tell, you don't tell the movie star on set, oh by the way, you can't shit in that toilet. Okay, if I'm gonna be on-

What did Josh Denny and Carl say that you shit in both of their bathrooms during Thanksgiving? Yeah. You remember that? I did. You got a shitting problem. I'm a talent, the talent's gotta shit. I'm Italian?

It was Thanksgiving, of course I shit in both their toilets. You're not supposed to shit twice ever. You do on pregame Thanksgiving shit. At your house! You shit when you gotta shit. No! That's a rabbit does that. A human being has a colon. Do we have a popular podcast? Do we have a devoted audience? Yeah. Okay. So what? Then you let me shit where I want to shit or it all goes away. That's it. Or what? You'll show up half asleep? Or what? I'll do it. I'll do it anyway. I'll do whatever I want.

Which is what? I'm gonna shit wherever I want to shit. And I'm not taking any shit for it. And so you are definitely taking shit for it because it's very aberrant. That's fine. I hope it brings you great displeasure. Yes! I don't want you shitting, not wiping properly. Well, you're gonna have... And not opening the window is the most egregious part. I put on... Because the window's right there. I put on the fan. The heat fan. The window is right there. Whose bathroom has a heat fan? I've never experienced this before. There's a coil, there's like an

oven coil in the ceiling. Why don't you put a fan in the window if you're so worried about it? Because the window needs to be open. Okay, I'll open. Open the window. Why do you not have that instinct though? Cause I'm not normally in a bathroom with a window. There's a bunch of toilet paper in here, I'm just gonna leave it. Not every bathroom has a window. But every bathroom has toilet paper.

Some bathrooms have fans. When I hit a button and a thing starts spinning, I assume it's a ventilation and you still leave the Toilet paper with shit on it that in the toilet wasn't refilled and we had to do this Oh, wait, who cares sitting here for like two minutes wait for the tank to refill It doesn't matter. Do you think I care about starting on time? When have I ever cared about starting on time never I'm gonna I'm gonna get wild with how I shit in this house. It's gonna be crazy. Brito, you're already breaking toilet seats!

Good. Are you gonna break toilets now? Yeah, I'm gonna break every fucking toilet in this house. If you're shitting in someone's toilet, If you're gonna do them the- I'm not gonna learn a lesson. I refuse. Stay in the bathroom,

Till you flushed all the toilet paper down. No. That's all people are asking. I'm not gonna flush even on the first time around. I believe you even stuff. I believe you and that'll be a bit And I'm gonna go in there and go how did super killer get printed and get in my toilet this is so weird It wasn was a stretch. That was a reach. No, I read it. It wasn't a stretch. That was a reach. Hi, I'm Tim Walden's son and my biggest problem is no Ricky Vitano on the biggest problem in the universe.

We haven't had Ricky in a while. Yeah, that's true. Please put on Ricky Vitano. He's my favorite superhero from the Eric Kimmel episode. He's my favorite superhero. Thank you. He's my favorite superhero from the Eric Jilai episode. Thank you. We got to do an Eric Jilai catch up episode.

There's been so much. His $5 sale. $5. $5. I some. $5. All the comics that Eric Jilai has finally realized that you can't just fill your warehouse with bullshit that you can't sell

But unlike instead of as somebody pointed out, you know, if you have like a company and you go We got all this on-should shit. Well instead of tanking the secondary market Let's just set it on fire because we're not retarded And said Eric goes all my comic books are five dollars now and his fans are revolting and they're like I gave you $35 a year ago for this fucking thing. What do you mean? It's five dollars Yeah Why is it five fans for some reason after are you on his behalf because he's a terrible businessman go Well, these are supposed to be read, you know, it's just to be read. Well, if it's supposed to be read

Why didn't you sell it for $5 to begin with? What do you mean? It's kind of just a fuck you It's a huge $5 You can't you can't especially when you do a Kickstarter or whatever, or whatever. I know he says, ooh, it's crowdfunding, it's crowdfunding. Why is he saying it's not crowdfunding?

Because he thinks that he's, his whole thing is he goes, I can't believe, you know, as an anarcho capitalist that people would give you money for a product that don't exist yet. So I gotta print it, you know what I mean? And it's like, yeah, but because you- Yeah, but why does he really say that about crowdfunding?

Cuz it's not, he's not telling the truth. What is he really angling for? Is it like a payment processor thing? Is it a tax thing? Well- Why is it not crowdfunded? Cuz he always corrects people, weirdly. Somebody said that it might be becauses people weirdly somebody said that it might be because PayPal doesn't let you run crowdfunding so if you call it

crowdfunding PayPal will go okay well you're not allowed to take payments anymore okay so Eric July is lying running crowdfunding through PayPal and not calling it crowdfunding that makes otherwise you can't take PayPal payments that makes sense yes none of the other reasons make sense I think that's the best explanation I've heard but he also accepted an award for crowdfunding from the was it called a crowdfunding award I don't fucking know what it was called. Can I give you this can I give you this present now that somebody sent us yeah sure okay Do you need a mouse pad? Yeah, okay. Well. This is a

commemorative prayer mat I assume of the 9-eleven September That's cool. You can always remember. Oh wow when the Twin Towers burned as you can see it has two planes Slamming into it. There's a missile labeled MSI Where's this from some guy to sent it to my second impact I just sent it to my PO box Yeah, what flag is this even know it or anything that in green flag. That's got to be Iraq right now Well there you go this is a As you can see we have the American flag we have the twin towers exploding with two planes going into them see we have the American flag we have the twin towers exploding with two planes going into them so when you're using your computer and you can use this

during you know during your daily prayer to Allah you can put this you can take this off your desk I'm sick of this one yeah so when you know when it's prayer time you just take your mouse pad off the desk you throw this on the ground turn your body to air man it's it's double. That's cool. It's a mouse pad prayer mat so you can double up That's nicer. That's way nicer than the city. That's very nice. Okay. Thank you very much. There you go Well, thank you to the fan who sent that in you didn't leave a note So I don't know if you want your name mentioned, but we do appreciate it Okay, it's a very attractive mat dual function feels good dual function

Very attractive, Matt. Dual function. Feels good. Dual function. OK. Mousepad prayer, Matt. That's smart. That's smart. If the calling shows were so fun and so good,

I would actually just consider it should just be bonus content. I wouldn't mind paying for that. It was pretty fun. You should do it in addition to the game. We could do one a month. We could do one every other month. This guy wants you to do a bonus content with a call-in show. I get all the super chats, right?

It's a bonus episode, so there's no super chats. Well, then what the fuck's the point of doing it? Yeah, what's the point of doing it anyway? We should, hold on. We should have more bonus content. I just don't know what to do. That guy said. The call-in shows?

But the problem is the call-in shows have to be public. You could play Jack games. The call-in show has to be public or the call-in shows have to be public. You could play Jack... Jack games. The call-in show has to be public or we won't have enough people to call in. It's gonna be just Patreon people. You don't wanna talk to them. No, I would, but I don't know if there's enough of them to show up and watch a show live. I don't know, maybe. We'll see. Why don't you do a fucking... Why don't we do a call-in show together?

That guy wasn't saying... No, no, that guy was saying you do the call-in show. Yeah, I know. I do it. That's the format. He didn't say you guys both do the call-in show together? That guy wasn't saying no no that guy was saying you do the call-in show Yeah, I know I do it. That's the format. He didn't say you guys both do the call-in show. God forbid Dick do anything. I'm awake. I'm just fucking awake. What is this? I have a perfectly normal amount of energy. Oh man.

Give me my trophy. I just wanted to follow up on the X-Men director guy thing. The idea that anybody feels harassed at work by just being naked pictures, it's pretty crazy. First of all, yes, Dick, the AI thing is absolutely right. I don't know if you've seen how Carl is using that defense against SJ. It's pretty good. But I talked to my girlfriend about what she does at work, which is obviously nothing, except for talk about dick a lot.

Her and all of her female coworkers are constantly talking about fucking at work. Yeah. Way more graphic conversations, like locker room talk, which women are always fantasizing that we're talking about dicks and pussies and stuff at work, which will not work. Some of us are working. So yeah, that type of harassment doesn't exist.

Working for a woman, that's harassment. I'm going HR. So women are talking about dicks at work. Yeah, pussies, I guess. I don't know. There should be more dick stuff at work. I'm okay with that. Okay.

Hey, Dick, hey, Vito. Hey. The biggest problem in the universe are not real meal deals. Ooh. So I go to Wingstop, not Wingstop, this fucking wing place. Okay. Before they had a deal where it was like,

hey, Wednesday's wings, bonus wings are 50 cents. Awesome. Really fucking cool nice post pandemic they're like you can now get these wings for 60 cents if you buy fries just like okay fries 50 cents not that cool but whatever okay but then if you want a drink you add that on and now you there's you get like 50 cents savings this me even less only that you have to buy a specific amount only five wings or 10 wings you can't do Okay, okay, okay?

cheaper Jesus Christ Okay, I'll get you Hey, what's going on guys the biggest problem in the universe is inappropriate attire I don't know if you guys saw Ethan Ralph at the hearing for Nick Reketa But uh when you go into a courtroom you're supposed to show respect Okay, the judge notices what you wear the judge notices who comes to support you so imagine Fucking Ethan Ralph pulls up. He sits next to fuck. I don't think it's not a wedding Doesn't hold your supporters shit about any of that

If that mattered you'd be paying people to show up for the other guy Nick wear a suit to court Nick probably worse of course Yeah, but the people in the fucking galley they don't give a shit The judge holds the guy on trial for doing crimes his friends against him How's that gonna go? I don't know also like fools. I don't think the judge goes around It's not like a wedding where you go are you here for the defendant or the plaintiff state? Yeah The judge doesn't know who's for who unless that you think Ralph in the middle of court was going yeah, Nick, that's a boy But you can get kicked out if you do that. Yeah. Oh God the seething and the cope around Nick Riketa's trial has been tremendous. No is lost it man. It's just crazy No, isn't that he's completely off his foot this lady boy

When Nick Riketa ends up basically getting a slap on the wrist if anything and they toss the whole fucking search warrant. The warrant will get tossed out. It's done. The warrant's getting tossed. The warrant's tossed. Everything's tossed. That's it. There's no coke. Or whatever it is. Uh, yeah, because they said the, for those of you who have not been paying attention to the Nicaricada trial, basically the defense was like, yeah, what is your justification for the warrant? Well, the cop lied. The cop has three lies,. I think three big lies, which is I got it on your YouTube channel Which he did I watched your video which he didn't he didn't watch the video

He just well he watched a video but he didn't say where the video was. He didn't say it's a copy He didn't say it was on another channel. He just said I watched the video It was taken down which it wasn't and I watched it which He didn't or he didn't it wasn't on his channel. They have to say that Aaron Emholdt is not a concerned citizen. He's a criminal informant for the state like he's working with the cops you know you have to say yeah, a a Guy whose wife that the plaintiff fucked told me that he did coke with a bit of a conflict

of interest there. Different. That's a concerned citizen. Oh, it's just some guy who said it? No, it's a guy whose hot young wife that he fucking depletes. His wife is getting fucked by the guy he wants us to raid. Yeah. Which is really bad when you...

Wait, wait, wait. Your justification for the search warrant was a guy who wanted to punish the guy who's fucking his wife. Yeah! Yeah. Oh, well, find his wife. Yeah! Yeah. Find somebody else. Find somebody else. Is that not allowed?

Find somebody else. Is that not okay? Is that weird? Is that not okay? And I forget what the last one was. The last one was the cop said, well, there's a, there's a, the kids are in danger because here's the CPS report. But the CPS report had already been closed.

CPS already said there's no danger. And the cop knew that and didn't say, here's the CPS said there might be danger. And CPS already said there's no danger. And the cop knew that and didn't say, here's the CPS said there might be danger. And then they said, there's no danger. Oh shit. Did they bring that up in court and say, well, the CPS report was closed? What are you talking about?

Yeah, that's the Frank's hearing that Nick's asking for to prove that the cop lied about everything on the search warrant. So what is gonna be the Kiwi Farms' hope is just gonna be? What is it? You're just, I mean, what is this Vito? You're like totally checked out playing with toys. I'm literally engaging with you and asking you questions about the negative trials. You're taking everything apart and ripping it up that you can find.

I can put it back together, it's a screw. What is this? It's just like trash everything. That's what this is. You smash toys and leave little bits of them all around the studio And I want to play with- What is this? I mean what even is this? It's just fidgeting around who gives a shit. Here, well, yeah. Okay, yeah, and then what happened? Yeah. Are you kidding me? I've been completely engaged in the conversation. You literally interrupted the point I was making to be upset. It's unbelievable. That I'm spinning a- What's your fucking point then about the screw? It's not about about the screw in the trophy. I bet you'll clean all that up, too, right?

I don't give us taking shit apart. Yeah, I mean I could tell that I know Nick Roketa's wife in the courtroom with sunglasses on indoors a baseball cap and a baseball pinstripe jersey. Like what? I mean, I like Ethan Ralph more than the next guy, but like, come on man. You can't put on a button up for fucking 25 minutes. You have to wear the goddamn baseball jersey. There has to be something better you can do than fucking pull off a Fred Durst cosplay in the biggest trial in internet history. You did have a Fred Durst look going. It's just fucking wild man. Inappropriate attire, biggest problem. I think the Fred Durst look is a good look for Ralph. I think he looks good.

Who the fuck cares what you wear to court? Who gives a shit? This is the whole court trial. It's all a kangaroo court anyway. Hey play that Metazoo one. I want to see what people have to say about metazoo I'm fine That actually played that metazoo game Seriously, like they signed up for all the big tournaments and the first one was like big $50,000 scam tournaments Like I knew like three people who all rushed to sign up for it one of them the tournament was on his birthday and he was freaking out because there's

apparently this card that's like Putting magic terms like one mana one damage, but if it's your birthday It's a free lightning bolt and it turns off the abilities of whatever you're shooting So if a tournament is held on your birthday you have a built-in advantage yeah that's awesome it's amazing what a terribly designed fucking game that's okay that's I like I can't believe that I can't believe that game didn't work out I I find it all very interesting you got it you got to go super meta then like all right your birthday you get this but if you don't use any words that have E in it,

you get like a double advantage. Magic used- Like Calvin Ball. Magic did that once in one of those unsets, and it was one of the biggest design decisions, worst design decisions they ever made. What's that? Well, cause they would have cards that were like

gotcha cards, where it's like, if you use an adjective, if your opponent uses an adjective, you can return this from the graveyard to play Yeah, so that just turned into games of magic where no one talks Oh, and everyone's like well, this isn't fun at all, but yeah, but the unsets are for like fun people. I guess yeah They're not supposed to be yeah, but it's still it's tactically advantageous to not talk the magic unsets are for people who would never say something like tactically and advantageous. It's for just a bunch of guys hanging out.

I'm just saying based on the metagame and the expected value of a booster rank. You're going to have to put down your toys to scroll through the super chats. Do I? I can do both. Toys. These are collectibles.

Well guys, don't forget to get your super chats in. Dick's complaining about everything today. You fidget with your alcohol, I play with a little thing. Oh man. Just because you can soothe your nerves by sipping your IPA is still an IPA. Well let's see what the people think, I guess. What do you mean no energy?

Take it back. No. How have you mean no energy? Take it back. No. How have I had no energy? What are you talking about? You're right. I take it back. What did I do that was low energy? We've been having an engaged discussion the whole time. It's been amazing. What is this? Why do you do this? You tell me!

We do a perfectly normal show I'm perfectly the normal amount of energy and then you put this idea and everyone's head. Oh, well videos low energy today I'm just I'm just fucking casting a spell on everybody to make them say the same thing. It's you are I Want okay. I'm gonna look at the chat right now. Where's the go for it? Am I low energy zero energy? Okay Then this is what you do and then I have to go unban everybody you will have to unban everybody You're such a poor sport because Because I'm not low energy. You show up and phone it in.

Hey, it's Travis and you never have energy. You are so low energy. Hide user. There we go. You're so low. And then this is a bit lashing out at fans for pointing out the obvious because they show up and you don't. Let's see.

Zayda Quinksel is banned. Is a bit. There we go. It's so crazy. The entitlement of you is just off the charts. Let's see. Oh veto is mid-energy Yeah, just cuz you're like high-energy crazy and I'm yes energy a normal amount of energy Oh, no low the show look at look at all the low look at all the low We don't need the naps high TV. No no go says veto. It's fine

naps. Hi team veto. Noco says veto it's fine. Veto is low energy for someone high calorie. Without all those people you banned. Yeah we gotta ban more people. Let's see low energy veto. Matteo is banned. There we go. Refund super killer. Refund super killer. There you go. Best decision you ever made. Refund super killer. We banned some of the people who are ruining the show by lying about my energy levels. Just one email. Write it. Refund, super killer. We banned some of the people who are ruining the show by lying about my energy levels. Just read one email. Write it, refund me. Order numbered. Oh, I've gotten those emails. That's it. Charge back on the credit card. I put them all in a folder and then everybody who wanted a refund is getting a very special variant of the comic.

Go complain to Kickstarter, whoever it is. Go complain to Indiegogo. Do it. Complain to them. Let's see, J-Rob detailing for five it. Complain to him. Let's see. J-Rob detailing for five euros. Cheers, lads. Synthetic Shinobi for two.

Thank you for not killing yourselves. Koof for two. Thank you for not killing yourselves. You're late, Koof. Koof for two. Gonna buy the shirt and a ticket to Greenland. Well, we'll see you there. Jamie for 10.

Don't forget, if Harris wins, Dick eats his book. Yeah, I think it's on the menu. Uh-oh. I was gonna say I might have a bit. I might have a good bit. Oh, yeah? Yeah. We gotta come I was gonna say I might have a bit. I might have a good bit. Oh yeah? Yeah. We gotta come up with some, I'll save it. I gotta remember to do it. Oh god. I gotta come up with it. It's just like put it in the trash then. Like what's the

good bit? It's a secret bit. I'm building up anticipation. What? It's gonna be fun. It has to do with you eating your buck. I'm giving a little hint of what's to come. Why don't the movie trailers just tell you who the killer is? Because you got to wait. They do. They do, actually. Sometimes they do.

And that's bad. Yeah, most of them they do. Well, they should stop. Yeah, OK. Coo for two, what's the best way to cook a book? Thoughts, Vito. Become a Democrat. Synthetic Shinobi for two, Coof.

No hard feelings, buddy. Dick got it. Coof for five, Reoof, no hard feelings buddy, dick got it. Koof for five, Reckon says he wants Vito to chuck dicks in his ass, no one wants that Reckon. No one wants that. Reckon's banned now. Hasman again, well he can come back if he apologizes for calling me low energy.

Go tweet about it nonstop, Reckon. Go tweet about it nonstop. Go on Discord and rise up, rile everyone up. Hasman for two, new show boys, guess what? Vito's still fat. Synthetic Shinobi for two, Greenland bait rile everyone up. Hasman for two, new showboys, guess what? Veto's still fat. Synthetic Shinobi for two, Greenland baiting, voted up. Hasman for two, biggest problem, fat people, literally big, humongo.

Zeta Quink Cell for five, Cole Marklin for two, Movember's coming up. T.T. Veto for two, thank you. Black Crimson for five, thanks for the snacks and thanks for not killing yourselves Fr for five age of empires and ocarina of time suck Equals or oinkles vetoes video game journalism career the locks for 2245 says Please play the gay team song for my fat

best friend Vito 45 already gonna write it down. So now what's the new one 25? I rule B-B-B-Bito, the Fat Team Guy. Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! Fat! I'm gonna be moderators. That's so bad. Hidden users. It should be in order. Now, you gotta show more. Why is CMC a ban? Is that not the real CMC? What are you doing? I'm unbanning a guy.

You're unbanning a guy in the middle? Yeah. Well, they're not in order, I don't think. Okay, no, that's it. Okay. Okay, anyway. Let's see, FFR it. Okay. Okay, anyway. Let's see, FFR for five. Shout out to Dick. I had Sky Kid and I was into Marble Madness like you. Thumbs

turned to meat if you were good. Yeah, those were good games. Marble Madness is a lot of fun. Laurence Devaney for five. I will have to catch up on this episode later because of IRL stuff. But hub-bub-a-bob to all. Meow-mang Chegs for fifty. I summon Vito's booty. Ah!

Also read the member super chats this week, you monsters. What's that? Do we not read all the super chats? I thought we read all the super chats. What's member super chats? I don't know. They're different? No, I don't think so.

I'll take a look. Meow-Mang, say it. Tell me what the hell you're talking so. I'll take a look. Meow man. Tell me what the hell you're talking about. Use more words. FR for two, Habababab to you brother. gun smoke star Foxy for I forgot to bring in video games LJ club Reno for five how I convinced my wife to let me do psychedelic mushrooms without her being upset You got a hide him in some just make her a pizza And don't tell her they're in there do something way worse

That she likes do something that will upset her way more and say like oh, yeah I'm also doing just make a pizza Cook the mushrooms up and a little bit of honey give them a little bit of sweetness and go ahead medicine made us a little piece by a little piece by a Black crimson 450 Australian can get a call to prayer for the Pokemon game card shop that was busted for having over one million dollars in Methamphetamine. Okay.

One million dollars methamphetamine in the Pokemon games now. Is not haram. Not haram. Wait, not halal? Is haram. Not haram. Not Haram. Wait, not Halal? It's Haram. Not Haram. Ha-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba I'm helping reading reading the email that I'm loading up shout out say what you see Pokemon Pokemon Pokemon Math Pokemon which is worse not even a lot knows Was the math labeled with name of rock Pokemon? May say Alex Smith. Let me get one kilo dude of Geodude let me get the Geodude

Golem, Golem, let me get the Golem of meth first you go the first you go Geodude, Weed, Golem, Cocaine, I go to I go to Pokemon card shop and I go I need to level up Do you have the rare candy and they go? Yes, we have the rare candy I need a chamo five snort Chichen Changa movie put the cocaine mess in the card Put the mate in the card. I need Jim Bage Put the maid in the card. I need a Jim Bage And the Jim Bage is I got the n-word budget do the man right away and then badge and then it badge And I gotta say I go to the whole thing in my head to do the initials correctly

Jim leader Kumiya is no good is no good man. We got the myth Rattick with the myth badge Jim leader Kumiya saw Brock and said, What sort of nationality? And he said, Japanese. And he goes, Ehh, okay. You know, he saw Nisa and he go, Too dark, not allowed in gym. Sometimes too wrong, I do make a right.

Yeah. Too wrong. Pokemon, wrong. Wrong. Pokemon, wrong. Yes. Correct? Metazoo Two wrong. Pokemon wrong. Wrong. Pokemon wrong. Yes. Correct.

Metazoo wrong. Very wrong. Meth wrong. Meth is wrong. But two wrong make a right. Well that's three wrong though. Well, you need to add more wrong. Four wrong.

You need to add a woman over eighteen. Yes. Wrong. Also wrong. Ok. Kumia. Gym leader Kumia. I love kumia Well

That's why we're not allowed to work in Hollywood. Oh, let's see here. No. It's a talent issue It's a talent. What do you mean? It's that's why we're not allowed to work in Hollywood It's not a toy who do you mean we're were you talking about me? It's a joke Foof you calm down. Yeah, just're just too you make it easy with a goo Too easy with these chow goof. They're not we goofs. No Okay, the we the we should my god we should is way Never make a little joke about the idea that Kumi is a Ideas are maybe a little too extreme for the Hollywood liberals. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was the bit. Uh-huh.

Hey, you wanna apply to be on a game show? No. We gotta go to Mexico. No. It may be fun. I don't wanna go to Mexico. We should do the Amazing Race. What are you talking about?

Amazing Race is a new game show where they try to determine which race is the best one. Oh yeah, I've heard that guy's joke. I have no idea if that's an existing joke. The Amazing Race, is that about white people? The guy that plays the piano? That's funny. Okay, sorry.

I didn't know it was, I didn't know I was stealing a bit. Like Robin Williams, vote, oop. Let's see here. Strategy for 10 Imagine voting, browsing Patreon for the biggest problem in card games. Bonus episode, but as soon as you click on it, Chuck's dicks in your ass. A couple of people want that, Vito and Dicks.

A couple of people want that. Mr. Poopsnoggle for two says, Cummies, Cynicys for two says, I hope you're having fun today, Giswoldy. Mr. Poopsnoggle for two says, Vito, you're looking very slim and athletic today. FR for five says, I'm your German cousin, Heinz. Disciple of Dagen for two says I'm craving chungusi.

Braves Ryan says something stupid about Oinktober. Oinktober, Oinkamania Assurance. How come you're not reading the super chats? Says I found funny moist crystal in my basement. I've been licking them to gain power. I can bench press a tracker now. Fear me mortal. I see in the dark but sun rays blind me with rage. Captain Blackbread for fives is don't forget to play my voicemail about the safety hazard.

Hello from the issue crew with Riley 2. I don't know about that. I might not have downloaded it. Stratergery for fives says I was watching Vito 2's Star Wars vid but the Death Star slowly started blocking my view. Turns out it was just Tony leaning over from many states away. might not have downloaded it. Stratergery for five says, I was watching Vito 2's Star Wars vid, but the Death Star slowly started blogging my view. Turns out it was just Tony leaning over from many states away. TTVdo for two says nothing.

Says my name, Pega. RealBlackGuy for two says, Chuck Dixon Facebook post our peak entertainment. Yeah. Ssdf for 10 says, Vito, the point of the toy bit is we bully you, and I'm not reading the rest of it. It's unreal. Government name for 10. Vito, you should show toy bit is we bully you and I'm not reading the rest of it. It's unreal! Government name pretend! Vito you should show dick.

You guys are getting to him. You guys are really getting to Vito. I will no longer read any super chats. The stress of super killer failing, the stress of super killer's imminent failure and the weight bullying is starting to really hammer you. Well I can just not read them. Okay don't read them then. I'm not gonna read them. Just scroll right to the end. Vito you should... Don't super chat the show anymore. I agree. Until Vito vows to read them. Okay. Don't read them then I'm not gonna read a scroll right to the end veto You should don't super chat the show anymore. I agree vows to to read everything. No, it's fine

Nobody super chat next week. Okay. Listen to me. Why don't you nobody super chat? Nobody's I'm fine. Nobody's don't super chat anything. They've stopped being they're not funny. It's just like a waste of time Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, we can't over you're a pig. Here's a pig emoji oink oink Such this just come up with some words than Eric. It's gotta be something new. I'm saying it's so boring at this point It's worse than Eric July remember when RFK said fat people belong in the circus. You see that today. That's cool. That's fine Government name for 10 veto you should show dick the I'm Gay video you played with Tony on the show if

Dick hasn't seen it already. That's a new song by... is it Hardman Working Hard? I forget who made that. Oh yeah, I played that. I'm Gay, very good song. Britsman for 2. Is that Coke and Dick's hair or just rapid graying? Iseta Quincell for two. It's not rapid. Says, looking forward to soupy, Suweeep- Temper. Suweeep-temper. Rarity made my dress for two. It says, it's my birthday.

Can I get an HBD? Oh, happy birthday. Happy birthday. To Rarity made my dress. Eric Wong for five. Blacks love Dragon Ball cause Goku and Vegeta married rich chicks then abandoned their kids to go work out with their bros all day black life goals that's pretty good

oink God says something about my weight Abe Schmidt pretend never super chat the show again you were never super chat the show again $100 says nothing the God of sleep 215 for two report the channel as all this channel the barbarian with cerebral palsy Fr for five a hundred super chat ignored fr says something about oinktober clips on the fire Race rant on opi and anthony everyone's gonna hate superkill loudly play candy crush into the microphone to piss him off Mike hunt for five Gary and his his Demons was pretty good. Another good unknown show is Seven Periods with Mr. Gormsby. The whole thing is on YouTube for now.

Okay. FR for five says something about my weight. Mike Hunt for five and the Australian cut of Demolition Man. They dubbed it all the lines. Oh my god. Where the characters said replace Talkable with Pizza Hut. I do remember that. So he's allowed, you can talk about food but but you can talk about you eat too much food. Yes

Sarah Gardner five veto saying that hug box. This is officially the OP hug box part of the show That's this is where the show dies Revoke your patreon's this is where the show dies tonight because veto will not read super chats. I'm reading them No, you're not you're ignoring them and pretending. It's a bit. They're just boring. It's just I'm just telling you That's exactly what Opie would say It's crazy to see in real time. Yeah, but it's funny. No, it's not I think it's fun. Opie thinks it's funny Well, he's like I'm gonna go do my own thing. What are you gonna do Sarah Gardner? I know what I'm gonna do. I got a great show do Dr. Polish for five says oink desert pirate for two no longer veto. He's a commie

Is that a quink sell for two something about eating? I wanted to give a bigger super chat, but had to give the same amount to other less funny shows Rusty Shackleford makes a hoggiest joke. Oh my god. Another Skip Chad. How many is that? Death is a preferable alternative to communism. The Jerry and Coke for five, better deceased than red,

had to edit because of comrades running sight. Fake Aquila for five has some stats. Vito, I love you buddy, but the giant grocery stores make 3% on a good month. Yeah, it's crazy. I manage a large chain. That is crazy. I didn't know that.

No shit. Well, I mean, but other, our department stores only make it 3%? Target on it? Is that what Kamala's targeting with food price fixes? Well, a lot of the targets in Walmart's are grocery stores now. So that's what she meant by- I'm just asking a question. A retarded question that doesn't have anything to do with groceries. I want to know how much they're making. I'm just curious

You want to know what Dillard's is making? I'm curious to know what is that guy showed you up and I hear like well What's something else? I'm curious to know what a Walmart is making 10% Let's see. Oh, no Walmart's 3% Dominic, Vito capitalism changes to find the most efficient way to produce something. Communism is controlled by the people. And the people are retarded. I agree the people are retarded and that is a big problem. Stripless Royce for two, do you have any oats brother? I am quite famished.

Hollywood for 10, this is another pro recada chat. Reject the boot of the state and a pig joke. Flutter Dashie for five. Another skip super chat, oh my God. Vito plays Shin Megumi Tensei III Nocturne. I think the remaster is the best version. But it's almost the exact same as the original. Either is fine. I still have been making, wanting to play that.

The Goose for five. Vito has zero idea how American economics work. And this painfully shows. Guess he'd know more if he actually produced products. Ruby C for five. Vito you are a slur. Kroger has a profit margin of 2% as of last quarter. Steve with some pig emojis. Oh, another skip Super Chat. Another Saunders for two. So Vito, I should be fired.

Rusty Shackleford for two. The bread is just to get you in line based. Luke makes some month puns. Another skip Super Chat. And Toy for five, Robin Williams was giving out Game Boys. 190s Halloween, my friend kept changing costumes, got three. Okay, well that's actually pretty smart.

He was giving out Game Boys? Is that not a to be fair thing? No, but I don't think so. Oh, that's cool. That's awesome. All right, I'll say that, it's pretty, look, Robin Williams was kind of a cool guy. He liked Evangelion famously, he liked video games, but.

I just like- You still wanna shit on him though. I'm not shitting on him, it's just like, why, why, it's like, it's just engagement posting it's like oh if I post a thing about Ron Williams I don't be sad and like it and retweet it it's like they're using his death for stupid endless clout. Pineapple man for five where were you when Robin is Killiams? My phone rang in 2014 a mom told me Robin is Killiams. I answer back on my phone and say no, that's crazy. He got kill yums

Trio Doug five comedians are the lowest form of human fuck their material also. We love V Yeah comedians has man for two vetoes mad someone's better than him. That's new Mike hunt for two hook was awesome Hook was awesome. Look, I like hook but it's like not great you know what the most interesting thing that I found out about Hook is, remember the big fat black kid? Yeah. You know, he had a piece of cheese with his name on it in the movie.

Oh. You know, remember that scene where they're all eating? Okay. So for some reason, there's a giant piece of cheese that has a carved likeness of his face, and his name his name was thudbutt and has the word thudbutt on the cheese as well okay and when they were making hook action figures and trying to decide what

accessories to give him he came with the giant piece of cheese with his face and his name engraved on it which is the most inexplicable action figure accessory I've ever seen and now I really want one But they're like a hundred bucks. Well the thud butt cheese. Yeah, it's good stuff Let's see Kufr to trio. Doug says I love dick Thanks, Kuf the gentleman sausage five problem with communism is always implemented by communists It was only work if was implemented out of spite by someone who hates it. That's a good point. DLKTDR for five, thank you to my high school math teacher for not not killing himself.

Godspeed, you sad said gnome. Fuck you, high school math teacher. Scarf for five, hey Vito, I saw your tweet where you advertised your second channel had a video. I wondered why it wasn't on the main channel until I saw it's low effort. It is low effort. The second channel is specifically for shitting out stuff that I'm not putting any effort into, like most of my content.

MintSalad is here for $10. Cool Lorenzo areola shirt dick. I do a weekly review with him on his channel. Everyone should check out Tits and Areola. If you like movie review shows, that's Tits Mint Salad on Fansly. You know what? I do feel bad about skipping $100 super chat.

Abe Schmidt for $100 says, Huggis is upon us and Oinktober is coming. Please play the Vito Team Guy song. No, no, no, no, I'm not moving the I'm not moving it up though. OK, because you would have got now that the team guy would have been 100. Would have been 100 bucks. But you skipped him. I accept. you know what? That's fine. I like the team guy song, but you gotta play it You're not gonna play. I'm not gonna play You skipped it how much I gotta pay to play how much do I have to pay can't 25 bucks, right?

You can't 25 bucks and you pay it. No you can't what do you mean? I can't I can't super chat They have to but you skipped it I will reimburse the next person to pay for the team guy song. How's that 25 bucks? You skipped it? This would have been a hundred bucks, but you just rules. I just get so emotional You get so emotional about everything not emotional, but you skipped everybody else's you can't just go back to the one that benefits you for two bread line veto's in the bacon line and then there's a bunch of pig emojis. Yeah, but you skipped everybody's so you can't pick the one super chat that helps you. Luke for two, snout timber, swine timber, slop timber. Classic.

That's only two, you skipped ten, you skipped eleven. Dick, it's the name of a month but with a pig pun. Yeah, it's hilarious. Wow. Those are all good. Let's do that forever. Why don't we just do a whole show that's just that? That's my show. It's a...

Fat Lodge. You know what it is? It's when you post a video and everybody comes in and they go, well, not all heroes wear capes. Not all heroes wear capes. Not all heroes... You know, it's like, you know, it's like, you know, it's like, you know, it is? It's the, uh, it's when you post a video and everybody comes in and they go, well, not all heroes wear capes. Not all heroes wear capes. Not all heroes, you know, and you're like, I don't... No, but this is like fat. Like, hey fatso. Yeah, but there's fat.

But it's, but it's fat jokes with a, like a lazy crutch of like, oh yeah, you're one to fat people can't really, uh... Oh, a pig, you know, cause pigs are fat and like, ooh, what if there was a month, like oinktober? Yeah, oinktober. And then we could come up with other months. Fat timber. I'm just fatuary. I just, I need people to try a little bit harder.

You're killing me with this stuff. No, no, but you still skipped everybody. I didn't skip everybody, I just went back and I did clear them. You skipped nine more people. Yeah, I'll be all right. Let's see here. Justin Wong, or wait, Juen Wong for five. Stop talking about Juen Wong.

Billing yourself veto, and then he calls me fat. Straturgy for two. That's another skib. You try to play GTA online. And Chuck Dix in my ass. Oh my god, this fucking lag. Straturgy strong. He split it into two.

Euthanasia enthusiast, when's super killer gonna be finished? I'm moving in one month and I can't change the mailing address I gave to Indiegogo. Not in a month. It won't be finished until December at least. The mailing address on Indiegogo does not matter. No address that has been collected currently will be used.

I will email you and you will provide your email or your actual address at that point. ClipSopper2, Sean blew his kidney stones at the toilet. Yeah, maybe Sean did it Oh, yeah, it was kidney stone and meow man chugs for five who the fuck shits at someone's house regularly. It's not regular It is very regular. It is not very regular When you draw okay, here's what happens is you leave your house, right? You leave your house, right? I not you I Anyone no you anyone No, what causes the need you know what happens if you look at a little kid and you want to suck their dick

Right, you said that you said that yeah you that's what I'm saying. That's the device You're gonna ever go into like a bookstore and you use the bathroom. No You ever going anywhere and you go, huh, I don't know why, but the second I've entered this place, I need to use the bathroom suddenly. No, because I just go home after I eat. The point is a change in atmosphere and a change in temperature stimulates.

Atmosphere? Yeah, what do you call it? Elevation? Well, yeah, I mean, you definitely, you live at the top of a fucking mountain. That's like 100 feet. It's still a change in what's going on in your body, in your body, especially changing,

going from like a warm, or like a cooled house, like an air conditioned house, and you walk outside into the heat. Yeah. It stimulates your body. So you're just remaining in the house, so nothing's changing. But I'm experiencing a change in temperature and air pressure and whatever else.

And that's why you end up having to the bathroom. It's like a lot of people say, hey, it's so weird whenever I walk into the bookstore, which has famously pretty good air conditioning. I always have to pee for some reason. Why are you going to bookstores? No, but back when I used to go to bookstores, I'd go, every time I come to this book store,

I have to pee for some reason. And then I eventually I looked it up. Yeah, that's fine. Or whatever. Shitting is not. I'm just saying, it's because you get to remain in one place and your body's acclimated to it. Me? Yeah.

If you were coming over to my house, you'd be like, oh God, I gotta shit for some reason. I would say I need a head-dress. Because you had to travel. and a door on the bathroom How am I gonna shit in your house? There's no fucking door. It's just shit without the door I'm just saying I'm gonna ask you to go outside Shit, I'm handicapped cuz I have to come over here and now you're gonna go I can't believe you're gonna use the bathroom If anything you should be happy I come over here to do the show you don't gotta go anywhere

Someone can't even shit in your house. I can shit in my house. But no one else can. You're right they're not yeah. That's a big problem. If you want to come over and shit in my house you can come over and shit in my house. No I don't want to do that. Cat shit in the house they got no problem with it. Let's see uh, Straturgy for two, damn it as a veto file dick is right poop at home no. Oglovich for five, veto shitting in other people's houses big problem voted up. This is my place of work It's not just your house This is this is this is the work we're doing it here. We've established this

I mean one of us is working. I think of us is banning supporters and not reading their super chats I'm reading their super chats. You did not you skipped fucking 12 of them So I'm gonna skip a couple more. Mr. Drunka for 10. Get Rucka Rucka Ali on the show. Enough time has passed. Vito leaving shit is wild. Does Rucka even do anything anymore? Like, I know that he wrote songs. I've never listened to any of his songs. He like completely fell off from what I can tell.

Was he like a big deal at the time? He had like a song, like I'm an Armenian song. It's like all of his songs sounded retarded and then he tried to pretend that he was this free speech, like, you know, think leader. There's a lot of those guys. And he sounded like a fucking idiot. All right, Sucke makes a bunch of pig pangs. Steve for two, I did my duty.

Let's see, MFF syrup compares me to a hog Yeah, another chance another side. How did you know? Feels untied it's unbelievable It's unbelievable that you're skipping comedy or unbelievable that a quick sell for nice to you or else you skip it You know you ruin that ruin everyone's fun. It's so fucking crazy You can be mean to me. It's so fucking crazy. You can be mean to me Grab a tron for five. I was high on weed for six years straight was during that time. I developed epilepsy Who even cares general cares about these shads? Hey dick and Vito I'm gonna skip all the ones making fun of me Any books or anything else that late you learn to write better any books you recommend for writers?

The best thing that you can do as a writer is refund Superkiller. There you go. If you bought it, refund it today. Pigeon for 20, are you gonna have EVS on when you launch Supperkiller? Yeah, we can do that. We've launched him every night. Isabel is watching you for five. We do need to have EVS on again. Isabel is watching you for five. You should keep two chests.

One for if Vito loses weight and one if he doesn't. They want to change the bet. Hey, guess what? I've heard that before! Holy fuck! Stop sending me the same fucking idea! Yeah, I get it! If he loses weight, it's a different fucking chest! If he doesn't lose weight, it's the other fucking chest! Shut the fuck up! Shut the fuck up!

God damn it! The same fucking email for two years! I get it! It's so funny! So you understand hearing the same thing over and over about- No, I don't understand what you're doing. I don't understand not reading it. I'll read it. Passive aggressively not reading it. I don't understand that. I'm not passive aggressively reading it. Yes you are! Okay. Let's see. Cyprus and Texas for two, lock the bathroom.

Spook Horse for five, if only Vito would work on his comic with the same passion he argues about shitting. Sea Villa for five, Vito, the problem with communism is that it isn't organic, capitalism is. You should have made a comic about shitting. Have stuff, you have stuff, I want your stuff, let's trade. If you made a comic about shitting, would there be shitting in it? I guess so, yeah. You would think, if I made a comic about like the super shitter, how much shitting would I see in that comic?

A lot. Are you saying there's not enough killing in Superkiller? I'm just asking, if you made a comic called Super Shitter, how much super shitting would you see? Wait, I'm so confused. Because you can't just answer a question without like they're playing the ramifications of it If you made a comic called super shitter, yeah, how much super shitting would you expect to see a good amount? I got a good amount

Is that your critique of super killer is not enough killing? This is super shitter that I'm talking about He kills a billion people base six bit whatever I won't spoil it Cybers and sucked this for two says veto you should care about the people around you I do Pitching for two inconsiderate bathroom guests vote it up Sarah Gardner five years dick complaining about people shitting and other people's toilets when he's shat his pants Yeah, but he shat his own pants. Okay. No, I've shat other people's toilets when he's shat his pants. Yeah, but he shat his own pants. I'll give you. No, I've shat other people's. You shat other people's. Yeah.

I don't know how you did that. I had to borrow them. Strategy for two says, remember, walking for Ricky is like flying for you. That's a classic. Yeah. Cybersuggests for two, Vito the Vito guy. Vito, Vito, Vito, Vito. Michael winning for five after leading one of the worst shows in history, Vito follows up with showing the toilet

at his place of work. Classic. Ewing Wong for two says TBF, some of July's fans are revolting. Yeah, they are, it's funny. They are becoming upset. Cypress and Suck does five, Madschen respectfully shits his own pants,

not others, you just argued with them. No, I've shit other people's pants. Oglovich for two says Vito uses round funding because, well, you know. See that's fucking funny. That's really good. Only because you got tricked into reading it. No, I didn't get tricked.

I said two- round funding. That's new and exciting. I haven't heard that before. There's so many skip super chats. I just want people to put in the effort. That's a good fat joke. It's not just a pig emoji. It's not funny though. Look, next week I will go back to put in the effort. That's a good fat joke. It's not just a pig emoji. It's not funny though.

Look, next week I will go back to reading every single pig joke. This week, I'm laying out. No, don't super chat ever again. I'm laying out. Nobody super chat ever again. I'm laying out. I want under 200 bucks next week.

I need you guys to pick it up. I want some real shit. StuK for two of those mouse pads are sold by Lord Miles. Do I know who that is? Oh wait a minute! Um, somebody sent me that they sent you a magic card or a Pokemon card at your PO box. Oh shit! Well I haven't, maybe I haven't got it yet? Like recently? Was it like- I'll bring it in next week. I gotta look next week. Was it in the last week? It was in the last week, yeah. Well I'll have to go check my PO box. Because I I told everybody send veto like shitty stuff and then send me a picture of it So he doesn't say send a shitty magic card something don't send something that's gonna make me lose my PO box

That's the end. We're all send total crap. Okay, just as long as it's not like, you know poy. Yeah Veggie so who's Lord miles? Do I know Lord miles? He's a British guy that like got arrested by the Taliban Oh, well, he is the guy who is apparently selling these Taliban mousepads So they're cool Lord miles is selling the rug mousepads his veggie for five and Stu K reminds us as well Is that a quick sell for two says never forget masala? Dean shock for two says thanks for laughs boys clip Sama for five says you should go shit in vetoes bathroom We can watch you do it from the kitchen because there's no door exactly So Iverson sucked his five says veto will say he does not mind his bathroom being used

because it's already a horrible mess. Well, you said it, not me. Well, let's see. We got some more super chats here. Let's see. There shouldn't be any. OK. Aklovitch Vatuz, his Vito has been in diabetic shock

for two years. Dan Saltman, five, how does it feel that Destiny's co-host, myself, Vito and Miss Girl are all from the same town? Who the fuck is Dan Saltman? You're from Amherst? Look at you eagerly clicking on it to get clout. Come on, I'm, yeah, ooh, ooh, yeah, let me see. You're going on this show.

This is the show you're going on, you cock suckercker. Oh you you're related to Destiny somehow. Let me see more about you I'm just saying Hold the fuck on a guy just told me he's from my hometown and he's Destiny's co-host. I can't find that curious Who are you? This is cloud hunting. I've seen this guy. I've seen this guy in the videos with Destiny. It's cloud hunting cuz it's live It's not like I'll file that away It's like oh I gotta go save. Are you going on this show isn't that the show you're going on? I actually don't know. Yeah, you don't even know the name of the show you're going on I'm trying to promote your upcoming podcast appearance, and you're shitting on the co-host of the fucking show

I'm not shitting on the co-host, I'm shitting on you You're going oh it's just Claude Hungry. You're like oh let me see more about you I'm Claude Hungry, you're the one going on the coals, I'm shooting on you! You're going, ooh, he's just cloud-hungry! You're like, oh, let me see more about you! I'm cloud-hungry, you're the one going on the show! That's the ultimate form of cloud-seeking! Nah, it's a good time. It's a good time for everybody, it's gonna be great. What should we talk about?

Why don't you find out the name of the show you're going on, you can promote it. Why? What's the point? So that people know when you go on a show you want to tell people you're gonna be on the show! Uhhh... I'm sorry that Dan Saldman from the anything else podcast tried to grade. I'm just saying I'm just saying you're like, ooh, ooh, ooh I won't read any oink oink tweets but our super chats, but James D for a 10 veto Why do you like getting served up the ass?

Jad dragon for two veto doesn't even have the energy to flush a toilet. That's what we're all thinking Okay, here's digital bath for five. That's what we're all thinking. Okay, here's digital bath for five. Let's read this one. Edo, the no energy slob with no social awareness. Pig, pig, pig, snout, snout, snout. That's clever. Knocked it out of the park.

Nailed it. Yeah, that's great. Nailed it. That's what people want the locks for two veto This makes me want to stop supporting you. Yes, exactly exactly stop You should trio Doug for five veto clips on was unbanning all those people. Yeah Good, oh, good unban everyone betraying me improbable for five Ben Carson energy Vita Yep, go for five Vito recon set you catboy picks and wants you to say he's cute He's assumed dare a to say he's cute.

He's a tsundere too, so he'll be all flustered but really happy to. Reckon, you're a cute guy and I love you. Meow Ming Chegs, member milestone chats, they're a perk. What the fuck is that? I don't know. How do I, can I? Don't do any of those. Well, why?

They're paying for them. No, I mean him. Well, you haven't read everybody else's chats. Yeah, but these guys are members. So? Free member milestone chat is a thing on YouTube. You get a super chat for free if you're a member of the channel once a month. Where are- Free super chat? Where the fuck is the free super chat? Kagon pose for two, any update with finishing the comic? The comic is cancelled. Doof warrior for two, I have the same pirate hat on your crew the Amazon ship sales here you go euthanasia for 279 Canadian

says oink oink oink that's hilarious I nailed it Steve for two Vito weighs as much as three elephants. Zeta Quintel for five, says fat fat fatty fat with some pigs. Michael Whitting for two, start the charge back, boys. Yeah, don't let him get away with this. More pig chats. Rusty Shackleford for five, Vito's a giant fee jote. I read the chat.

Richie Richard for five, would a nuclear holocaust cancel out global warming quite possibly cool for 25 says veto the gay team guy. Okay, I think that's a that's a fair amount Well, he would have given he gave a hundred bucks to make this the second time you fucked up this show. If we're trying to make- if we're trying to make money, we want the slow escalating scale. We don't want it to get to 100 immediately. If we're trying to make money, we gotta, uh, be high energy. Gamer, okay?

Yeah. And not- not read Super Chats. Well, what if we bait the audience with the idea that their pig Super Ch are affecting me so deeply that they want to send an infinite amount more to try to get to me. It's not a bid. You know, now everyone's going, oh now I have to super chat a bunch of pig stuff because it's really getting to Vito. Yeah, yeah. Let's see, Christian, last name for five, I took work off to catch you two live and this is what I get exactly Drain jabe for ten original bit idea two people walk out of a bathroom covered in crap and they blame each other for smearing it

On them, but only one person preemptively planned it. Well, the other person is clueless Well, I think that's very similar to another bit black that James D for ten veto frequent urination is a sign of diabetes Well, luckily, I'm not paying, I'm a pooping. Desert Pyr for two. You definitely have diabetes. Same guy who eats half a Twizzler. Yousef for two, dude, the two chest idea is pretty good. Danny Fist for five.

My Twitter, like other box of the shit you don't read is just like, hey, dude, I got an idea. I got an idea. I got an idea. I don't know what you should do with beauty. Hey, you don't read. It's just like, Hey, I got an idea. I got an idea. Everybody's got an idea. Danny Fiss for Five Australian Veto Gets Too Much Grief About Being Fat and Not Enough About Being Dumb. Vote up, fat brain. There you go. All right, is that it? No, hold on, hold on. On the John Fertusas test. Test. And Ku Fertusas also be sending a 25 dollar e-voice.

What do we got here? Will everybody! Will, hold on everybody. This thing's shooting up a lot more than it used to. Shooting up? Like falling off? Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Oh, what's the game where we smash all the toys? Vito's Booty Oh, my, my! New tweets about little boys! Vito's Booty What's in the box? You know you want it!

Vito's Booty So get on the scale or I smash it as shit! Vito's Booty Vito's Booty, Vito's Booty, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep Oh, he's going for it. He's walking the plank. He is is here he's gonna fish the scale out of the hot water heater over there and Move it over in a level place and He's weighing himself. Oh

Well, I've got good news and bad news for you. Alright. What do you want first? Good! The good news is you are under 300 pounds. Excellent. And the bad news is only that you won this toy. Can you- you gotta tell people what I weigh. 297.7.

All right. So, it's like a ramp, a steady ramp, from a year ago almost. Steady ramp. 293, 282, 300, remember those days? Yes. Now you're all the way back up to 300 pounds. Well, let's, I think we can get over 300 if we keep at it

Oh, I don't think you have to keep it for anything. I know. Here's the toy. Oh wow. It's in a something. It's a It's got a Vito's booty yar on the side. Yar. Someone sent in a package for ye. Okay. Oh Well, that's your you pee that's your yo box address Okay, you don't do you know what this is I? Don't know I don't know what it is. Could be something good could be something even better now it's got a It's got a ziplock bag. Wait. I'm actually a little sis. Do you know what this is? It's got a ziplock bag in it Jesus Christ.. It's got a weird note. It's got some lolly here. Okay. Okay

All right. I don't want to see that out of this eye. There's another there's another biggest fan note Am I gonna have to read this? Whoa! Hey, this is a cool one. Okay. That's a little bit of lolly. It has lollies on it Hello Vito. I'm a fan of URs Hello Vito. Wait'm a fan of URs. Hello, Vito. Wait, what is Ichigo Mashi Mato? I think that's the guy who drew that. Oh, OK. OK.

So it says, hello, Vito. I am a fan of yours. Hello, Vito. Me and you are alike. So that's troubling that he said hello, Vito twice. You should call him. OK. We both are sort of contrarians

We both like Tim Rogers and his content. Well, I don't like Tim Rogers because I don't know him I also don't like you because I don't know you but I like the content that you both make we stink yuck Okay and close inside so people can see the hundred No, why are you yanking away from me? I'm not gonna do anything. I'm just, have you read, have you read this? Uh... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Cause, I'm a little worried. It says a photo of it right like not actually it

By like a child Closed inside is a photo of my ejaculate all over a photo of you Along with a photo along with one of my favorite handhelds, so so apparently it's a photo Apparently it's a photo of ejaculate. It is not actually ejaculate. I hope So it's a picture of my touching it. Yeah, it's a picture of my face with cum on it. He jerked off on a picture of me and then he took a picture of the picture. I don't know if I want to touch this shit. I'm hoping it's not actually... And then we got a Miu mini, very nice little...

Oh, I'm glad we didn't smash this though. I hope it doesn't have a jackulate on it, but... Well, thank you for the... I'm worried that he filled this up with something that the FBI is gonna come to my house though. It does have a USB stick in it. You want to hold it up? Oh my god, that is a fire. Well, you don't mess with it. I'm sowing people. Okay, oh it's turning on.

That 100% has come on it. I don't think it has come on it. It does! It be having come all over it, Vito. Let's see if we put any games on here. Hey, can we get a little bit of fog in here? Why? I don't fucking know. know that you hated the fog. I love all the fog. I love everybody. Oh, let me find these men Oh god, he came all over this picture of you Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Sometimes people see my face and I'm glad my fans have enough emotion that they want to jerk on a picture of me and send me video games. It's very touching. See, this is the kind of parasocial relationship I approve of. This is a level of psychopathy that I appreciate the thought. Oh, sure. I'm just glad he didn't send actual ejaculate. This is a level of psychopathy that I appreciate the thought. Ugh. He jerked off. Ugh. I'm just glad he didn't send actual ejaculate. He sent a picture of ejaculate. Well, you don't know that.

You know, it's good. It's good. OK, recent member activity. Recent comments from members. Your super chat and sticker activity. How the fuck do I see super member whatever? All right. We got to look it up next week,

because I have literally no idea where to see this. Active members, recent member activity. Okay, so will it have recent? Recent comments by your members. Yeah, that's comments. That guy's making shit up. That didn't happen. He's not, what he's saying is not a real thing.

Well, hold on, I looked it up, so let me see if this tells me how to see it. Members can only send Milestone chats during live streams. OK. Remember, Milestone chats. Can send one highlighted message per month. Only members in their second consecutive month is in Milestone chats.

I can turn them off. All right. Goodbye, everybody. Guys, so thanks so much for sending your ejaculated pictures here. Show our top supporters. Stop messing with it. There we go. Thanks to everybody who sent a message about me being a pig or a month being related to

pigs. They're all good. Refunded. Refunded, canceled. No refunds. There are no refunds. But, I do appreciate it and you know, I read them all in spirit I feel.