The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 155

Episode Date: September 7, 2024

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 the pig man's gonna... should not be the first one you're laughing so the answer is clearly yes well you know what I mean obviously that's funny if you're laughing the answer is yes there we go I don't think you need to do it it is funny though I think you need to do it
Starting point is 00:00:27 It is funny though Now you do oh, okay. Yeah, that's true Already seconds We'll do a little... Forty seconds? Yeah. Hmm. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. Ah. Check, check, check. Okay, that works. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:03 Hehehehehehe. You gotta be stone-faced. You gotta be like, don't even acknowledge it, yeah, yeah. You gotta be stone-faced. You gotta be like, don't even acknowledge it. Oh, okay. Do whatever feels right. Mmm Oh, do you have a different one? This? I have no idea what that is. It's a somewhat somebody sent it in as a present, I think. I have a ton of presents today. That's good. That have been stacking up. Yeah, well we get sent a ton of presents today. That's good That have been stacking up Yeah, well we got a lot of stuff Yeah, most of its garbage. Yeah. Yeah stuff that gets sent in. Yeah Well, what can you do? But this is a pretty good one. What are you gonna? Are you gonna be a mystery host?
Starting point is 00:01:41 Mystery, what's the mystery behind? Wait, what's behind the mask? What is this? I don't even know what this is Somebody sent this in for you. Yeah. Yeah now This was I have no idea what that is somebody sent this in for you. I'm very excited. I think it's for you Okay gave a size. That's right between one of my favorite guys. Yeah, they're yeah the good doctor One of my favorite guys yeah, they're yeah the good doctor Dr. D. Yeah, who's killing it right now? What's that? What size we got he came back in the nick of time? Is this oink to jump into the wood chipper for you?
Starting point is 00:02:20 You will he can't I think I'll be able to fit yeah, okay What do you mean he jumped in the wood chipper for me back He came back just in time to get called a pedophile by 300,000 people for free. Is that what's happening? I can't tell what's going on. I don't know if- because his fans don't care. Yeah, that's true. They don't. Yeah, which is tragic. You're like you can't get them to care. And team celebs don't care. Yeah. Koryring doesn't care. No, they love this guy. They love it. I'm so glad he spanked I'm so glad he's you know showing the haters. He's running 4d chess. He's running 4d chess He put that minor thing in the in his post to trick journalists into thinking he was a pedophile Yeah, he said that and now they're saying he tricked journalists into thinking he was a pedophile So now he can sue them.
Starting point is 00:03:06 Yeah. Which is- We wanted to get caught. That's not how that works. And you know what? You can't go to a journalist and go, I killed my wife, I killed my wife. And the journalist goes, Okay, I'm gonna write an article
Starting point is 00:03:16 about how you killed your wife. Oh, I gotcha. He also, he wasn't sexting the girl, which he explained by saying his messages didn't constitute sexing sexting, okay I've never said my messages with veto don't constitute sexting you would say I have never sexted me sound to sex Dick you ever sext a minor no, okay Would you say is there another way even close not even close Is there any other way you would like- I don't think I've ever texted a minor.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Right. Is there any other creative phrases you might want to come up with on the fly? I sent my nephew the gif of that guy throwing up at a baseball stadium. He's like, bleh, bleh, all over himself. That's the totality of my communication with minors. That's the most you can get out of him. And- It's a lot going on.
Starting point is 00:04:05 Twitch didn't, even though it wasn't sexting, Twitch didn't even bother to check that the minor he wasn't sexting with was actually in her state that it is the age of consent. Yeah. So him sexting, him not sexting a 60-year-old is actually fine. Here's, yeah, that I could not wrap my head around where he's like,
Starting point is 00:04:25 well they didn't even check, is he saying they didn't check what state she's in? Yeah. It kind of sounds like he's saying she might have been legal. She was legal, well first of all no, because you can't sext a minor and then cross state lines to dick down the minor. If you're in California, if they thought, the federal government thought of that. Really? Yes, you can't, just just warning out there for everybody thinks they're funny I don't know the rules because I have no interest in sexting miners And if anyone asked me if I six miners I would say no Yeah, and I don't understand how his fans go. Well, you know for legal reasons
Starting point is 00:05:01 He has to say if a man to say Perhaps with an electronic message Was perhaps to digitally insert herself onto my device He's talking like this cuz he's got a lawyer and a lawyer is advising him To do that that's the problem unless it's that new retarded lawyer that just passed the bar. He's got some problems. Speaking of problems... Biggest problem in the universe. Best show on the internet. And it's back and it's better than ever.
Starting point is 00:05:34 I have some clips... Episode 155. I have some clips from your...what would you call that with Ethan Van Skyver that you did last night? It's an excellent podcast. We do a good show. One of the funniest podcasts I've... One of the funniest episodes of Trashcast I've ever seen. One of the funniest episodes you've ever seen. I was dying.
Starting point is 00:05:52 I don't know why you would be dying. It's just two men having a fruitful discussion about the world of podcasting. Oh man. You know, Ethan's a performer, I'm a performer. And we talk about the nature of performance and what that might look like Ethan has Guyver in his like, you know king chair Hmm. He was like Columbo Columbo was like, you know a powerful man and not a bumbling retard. Okay, and Columbo was not a bumbling He made me act in like one. Yeah, he was and and then what happened Vito and you were like
Starting point is 00:06:25 You think I got Columbo He was like, and then what happened Vito? And you were like, oh, oh, well, oh gee, you're like, oh, oh, well this happened, and then, oh, oh, oh. Oh, you thought I got Columbo'd? You think I got Columbo'd on Trashcast? You just got like, oh, oh, oh. I don't think that's correct at all. You told him some little fibs too, I noticed. I clipped those. Okay, okay, are we gonna watch them later?
Starting point is 00:06:41 We can watch them later. If people wanna donate. So people are gonna have to stick around till the end of the show, and then Dick will play his little clips We're gonna watch him late and watch him later if people want to do I'm gonna have to stick around Till the end of the show and then dick will play his little Little clips that he's got do you have any rules for any super chats today or thank you by many rules? There you I think I think you quit all that shit I think the rules will appear throughout the episode sprinkled around you know so you gotta you gotta pay attention at home I want you to take out your biggest problem
Starting point is 00:07:07 Junior reporter notebook right and if you get all the clues together you junior woodchuck Yeah, you'll know jumbo woodchuck guidebook on the end of the episode. You'll know all the rules, okay? It's gonna be fun. This is a real spicy week everyone was talking about it. I do I do you know what I got one thing I do want to say oh you have a you have a statement. I have a statement real quick Cuz you know I Don't have it a lot of fun. I know and I'm having a lot of fun, but Well, this is it What may end up being the biggest problem in the history of the show the problem nobody wanted or saw coming the end of shows
Starting point is 00:07:45 Sometimes show run their course. And this is one of those times. 354 consecutive episodes. This will be the final show for the biggest problem in the universe. I want to give a special thanks to all the guests, callers, all the people who sent in JPEGs, the fans who came out to live shows, people who brought me drinks, all the contributors and people who worked behind the scenes
Starting point is 00:08:07 to make this podcast possible, including producer Randy, Sean the audio engineer, assistant Jessica, Lori Foster and Megan Panock. The show wouldn't be possible without you. And finally, a very special thanks to me for tirelessly putting in 10 to 12 hours per episode for over two years without a single break. You're welcome. So long for now. It's been a hell of a ride. I don't know who wrote that. That's just a thing I found.
Starting point is 00:08:34 You know what? If you would have quit and not thanked me, you would honestly be the king of the internet. That would be the funniest thing. It's like that guy gave up $72,000 a year to not thank that guy again That would have been the funniest thing I don't know funny is the right term. No, okay. I your funny meter is not Calibrated to the same as mine. That's part of this whole thing. We have two Converging, but we have a Venn diagram of humor. Yeah, a lot of things we think are the same funny,
Starting point is 00:09:09 but then there's a lot we don't see are funny, and I'm telling you, that's funny. All I'm saying is, you know, sometimes they're bringing snacks. Don't get a big thank you out from it. Yeah. Just, I brought you and your- You wanted thanks for eating the snacks, I think.
Starting point is 00:09:21 I brought you and your girlfriend sandwiches, and frankly- Did we not thank you? You didn't think you thanked me. I didn't? No, I think you and your girlfriend sandwiches and frankly Do we not thank you? You think you thanked me. I didn't? No, I think you did. I think manners are very important to me. Actually without manners, my behavior on this show would be my behavior all the time and someone would kill me. So I have to have very good manners.
Starting point is 00:09:40 I think the biggest thanks you can give an Italian guy is saying that the food he brought you was tasty. And you did say it was tasty. It's always amazing. I know Are we doing a show? All right There we go. Oh, that's shut up. That's fucking little thing shit Problem in the Problem in the oink oink oink oink oink. The biggest problem in the universe. The only show that ranks every problem in the universe from car rental agencies squeezing you for cash
Starting point is 00:10:15 to the government causing another market crash. You're hosting massive. Joining me as always is Vito Giswoldi. Hi, Dick. How you doing? Are you prepared for the crash? Are you ready? Oh God, the market crash? It's coming, man. I think it's coming. I've been waiting for it for two years, you know
Starting point is 00:10:30 I'm not like a fucking financial genius, but Look, they've done it so many times before it seems kind of obvious. I don't know. You prepared? You leveraged up? You got Stop putting the fear of God in me about this fucking shit. I don't know, maybe I'll start pulling out of some markets. Oh yeah, how's your hymns doing? I mean, I'm still up.
Starting point is 00:10:55 I probably told everybody the wrong time to buy, but... What? I was looking at the graph of hymns. And then when you were telling people to buy was at 25 and now it's at like 14 or something I think I told I think I started telling people to buy at 14 so okay And then it went to 25 you could have made money is that my fucking problem I? Bought it eight so I'm good. I think my cost basis is eight okay, I Still like that company
Starting point is 00:11:27 Some aglutide. Yeah, I put my subscription because they sent me so many I'm on that the finesse dried or whatever the pill Okay, I don't know if it works. I just said what the hell right for the hair Yeah, for the hair like stop it from falling out and honestly, I have too much testosterone So I'm mostly interested in turning the testosterone into the hair stuff, right? But then they send you, it's like one a day, but then they send you a prescription for a month with like 100 pills in it.
Starting point is 00:11:55 Oh yeah. I'm like, what am I supposed to sell these? I'm a man, I'm not throwing drugs away. Are you just taking the pill or do you also put the goo on your head? Just the pill, I'm not doing good shit. I have a weird thing about my hands being sticky and my hair being sticky. I can't do it I understand um Okay winners last week subsidizing demand one. That's me stupid fucking broom
Starting point is 00:12:17 Rental car insurance number two also stupid tools. I think is losing your tools was good Yeah, but rental car insurances really hits you Yeah But how often are you renting a car once in your life to get hit with that rental car insurance shit is enough to make you I'm losing my multiple times a year then you get to go buy more tools You might have a point buying tools cyberfrog saved the biggest problem the universe I think in one way What I'm asking to a lot of your point your With Ethan Vance Guyver talking about therapy session I went I talked about the fuck is really patient watching him talk to you
Starting point is 00:12:55 And you lie to him right in his face and try to like manipulate him Made me feel like I want to be a better man. Why? Anytime I try to be like instead of a piece of shit. Anytime I try to be genuine with people and this is the craziest thing is I go I want to thank everybody Ethan I want to thank you for everything you've done for me and I come in here and you go you're such a disingenuous piece of shit Okay, do you want to hear what what? Let's hear well, I'll thank you which part let's hear the this is you thinking
Starting point is 00:13:36 Genuinely, this is me thanking you guys. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I have this This clip let me see here this you're gonna. This is crazy I'm all of this all of this seems to come down to Vito is ungrateful. Yeah. You know, we're his friends. We defend him. Yeah, we've elevated him. We've given him this show. We've funded his comic, and he's not grateful for our support, right?
Starting point is 00:13:55 He isn't. Yeah, that's the worst part of it. See? See? So right. I'm right. I think that is driving everybody nuts that I'm not... That there's this idea that I'm not grateful enough, right?
Starting point is 00:14:06 Right at all now now Even I think you will have messages from me or in your back end Thanking you pardon me in your in your DMS. I whipped what was that? Yeah, the back and I've said Ethan Yeah, first of all don't feel the need to support me, but I have to tell you that your support has been invaluable to me. You know, I thank you so much for what you've done. Oh my god, god forbid I thank a guy for helping me.
Starting point is 00:14:35 God forbid. If there's any big project you want to promote, please tell me. Oh, if there's anything I can help you, don, don Ethan, if there's anything a humble veto can do to help you With your projects and push them over the goal Because I I do owe you Obviously I owe you More for me than I will ever do for you
Starting point is 00:15:02 You're incapable of gratitude. Do you want my blood? Do you want my shoes? In the same way I hate, you know, fucking elaborate praise and whatever else. You hate the idea of gratitude. That's not gratitude! That's like an antiquius, like, groveling. Like, oh, oh, I've been reading so much to you, you can't even know. You're the sun and the moon to me, Ethan! Ethan's done a lot for me. I don't know what to tell you.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Reciprocate on a level that would give you back what you gave me. Here's what I'd like you to do. If that's true at all. Which I know it isn't. But if it is true at all. Which part's not true? Oh the part about oh I owe you so much. What do you owe me? You owe me anything.
Starting point is 00:15:42 I do. I absolutely do. I have no I do. I absolutely do. I have no idea how much I owe you. I feel that way. I don't know what you want to say. Yeah. Okay. Why would I not owe- Okay, let's be real. You should feel that way about the $2 super chats though.
Starting point is 00:16:00 I owe that guy the world? Yeah. I owe the $2 super chat guy the world. He's done so much for me. I would say look, there's a lot of guys who have helped me out. You're one of them. Mm-hmm I'll say you're the top guy It cost me 20 bucks though, I cost you 20 bucks that guy's super chat about losing weight that cost me 20 bucks No, that cost you about seven bucks because it gets cut in half and then the YouTube takes 30 percent cost me 20 bucks. No that cost you about 7 bucks because it gets cut in half and then the YouTube takes 30%. Cost me 7 bucks. I'll give you 7 bucks. I gotta get a booster pack. I'll buy you a sandwich! How much is the sandwich? You don't even know.
Starting point is 00:16:33 I was asking your way of making up for the 50 dollar shoot. I brought your girlfriend a puzzle. So everything's smooth sailing. That's true, that'll keep her busy for about two hours. I try to find good puzzles when I'm out thrifting. You brought her food, I don't like that. I, you, I, T, S. I try to find good puzzles when I'm out food. I don't like that. I Want to eat the food I sent you a private message and you said yeah get two of them So it's your fault that she got a sandwich Wait you want to hear another eat the van skyrook? No, I don't hear anything This was a real weird comment This was a real weird comment. Okay, whatever You knew the metaphor. I was going for that's the problem with it. This is the peakest This is the most veto thing ever why you are
Starting point is 00:17:13 irreplaceable Completely this makes not on this show but on this earth this this comment is so preposterously rude so preposterously rude that no one could just do it. If you gave a million comedians a million years to write the most offensive thing you could say, they couldn't come up with something like this. This is you talking to Vince Guyver. He's talking about getting girls.
Starting point is 00:17:38 Fat guy's getting girls. He's talking about getting girls. I asked him how he met his wife. And I said, you must have been a skinny guy when you got here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, here's what a skinny guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah So, I mean there's always that like finding um somebody who is like Healthy like emotionally healthy and still attractive on the outside is really tough that is really really tough to do For fat guys like us, you know, yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't count on it. Where you uh, but you were a skinnier guy when you uh Landed the way well not the way landed the big fish
Starting point is 00:18:23 Okay, you've heard the way big catch, you know, oh, you know, she's quite a catch. That's what I'm saying. She's a catch. She landed a whale. Okay, you've heard... Landed the whale. The big catch, you know? Oh, you know, she's quite a catch. Yeah, she's quite a catch. Not she's a great big fat catch that you got there. That's quite a catch you got there. And a thing, I think, you know...
Starting point is 00:18:35 She landed a whale? Well, you know, you think of... How old were you when you backed that dump truck up? If I'm thinking about great fishing metaphors, my mind goes to Captain Ahab chasing down what's his name? And land a whale. Well that's a good point. That's not a good metaphor for someone's wife Ahab and Moby Dick.
Starting point is 00:18:51 I'm just thinking when you think of like the most challenging form of fishing. Why don't you just talk like normal, like when did you meet your wife? When did you like first start courting your wife? Like why does it have to be a whale metaphor? I think metaphors, you know everybody likes metaphors it's fun. I think maybe I think maybe you're swinging above your I think if you're thinking about looking for a metaphor about catching fish what is the most majestic fish you know the most challenging fish to catch would be a whale. No you're not you don't fish for
Starting point is 00:19:22 whales you go out and harpoon them. Yeah exactly. Well, that's a that's hard You can't you still catch them you bring them on the boat with a team of other guys You catch like a marlin or something no, those are just your boys sleek and fat your wingman Now when did you fuck that big tuna? It's not a fish Hmm give me a taste of that baby called a I think it would be called a lady of tuna. That's not bad. Hey, you landed that tuna. Nice can.
Starting point is 00:19:50 Well now we're getting into other fish metaphors. Alright. I'm great. I'm great on all these shows. Every show I go on is a delight. I'm one of the greatest pod guys I've ever fucking met. You did Mint Dirty though. No I did not. I'll play more of that later. You know what? You're right. I did not play more that no, you know what you're right
Starting point is 00:20:06 I did do meant dirty and I apologize Maddie Mac says vetoes mad at caves caves because he can't fit never mind. I forgot. It's a new fun show now. There you go Noosa says you don't fuck with the money. How hard is it to read super chats? I don't know Very difficult. Well, the rules come out throughout the episode. There's no rules. Ah, Sammy Classic says, I'm 20 minutes into the show and you know, your silkiness is so severe that I'm feeling ill from secondhand embarrassment.
Starting point is 00:20:36 So you only pulled the negative comments then. Well, yeah. Okay. If you want positive ones, you have to pull them. I know. Ah you know what? I'll let you steer the ship. Wait, no, I have a good one for you. JD Power & Associates says, shithead veto
Starting point is 00:20:52 is the best veto, whether I agree or not. Thank you. Jeremy Jackson says, veto stay the course. Demand respect from your audience. They must behave with more decorum and civility. The internet is no place for petty insults or rude jokes Oasis says just spam pig emojis in the chat. We need to get ready for oinktober I hope the biggest problem to gets better better get used to beef Okay, then he's got a bunch of oinktober fast
Starting point is 00:21:26 They get worse Yeah, well, there's a lot of positive ones, but I decided I would just Were you gonna read positive? No, no, I don't want it to devolve into who's right and who's wrong. Yeah, it's all about having fun Okay Well, it's nice that you're back. Do you have a do you want to do? I have a very exciting segment about former problems It's called vaudeville This is sent in by reckon. Yes Is this new or is this from this is new you cut his one short last week So he made a worse one. says. Got it. Here you go. Please go and just vote it, vote up all the problems, or Vito will leave us and the show will be over.
Starting point is 00:22:13 Please go to the website, biggest problem that shows, and be nice to Vito, wish him well You know everybody can make these right not just wreck on anybody in the audience Of any sort ungr he's ungrateful. No, I mean they've got such a... He put a lot of work into that. I'm sure he did. They've got a lot of great character to them. Guys, it's voted up.
Starting point is 00:22:54 When we talk about past problems, we put them in a new light. Dick from Bonus Episode 22, which I think must have been the Chinese episode. Biggest problem in China is the problem of appealing to the Chinese episode. Biggest problem in China is the problem of appealing to the Chinese market. Oh, is this Lauren Chen? No. She's appealing to the Russian market, right? Same thing.
Starting point is 00:23:14 Same thing, all the commies. Get Harris elected. That's the market. That's what's important. That's what's most important. Well, the problem, I think, was the idea that a lot of Hollywood productions and other productions are now made with China in mind,
Starting point is 00:23:28 and the quality sometimes suffers as a result of putting a bunch of Chinese stuff in there. Like, oh, it's good to have a dragon. We gotta make Shang-Chi. He's like a Chinese fighting guy. Put this guy in, and they'll make this role important for no reason, so we can cram this guy in it. Well, we might actually, this might be a voted down situation as we might be seeing less
Starting point is 00:23:49 of this. Oh, why? Walt Disney's latest film, Deadpool and Wolverine, despite being the highest grossing R rated film of all time has failed to replicate that success among Chinese movie goers. Oh no. Though it did make a respectable $57 million. A Chinese-produced comedy-drama successor has made six times as much money in the same time period.
Starting point is 00:24:11 And it's also abysmal compared to previous Marvel movies, such as Avengers Endgame, which was the third most popular movie in China back in 2019. Maybe they just know it sucks. Well, it seems like Chinese. It makes no sense! I can't spiral! There is some of that.
Starting point is 00:24:30 And there's also, it seems like China has figured out how to... I think when Hollywood went in there, China really sucked at making movies. It's like they just couldn't make anything. And now they just suck. Now I think Chinese filmmakers are like, now we know how to make this fucking CGI dragon shit. It's not that hard. You put a bunch of guys on a fucking green screen you have them go
Starting point is 00:24:47 Oh, no dragon giant golden dragon is coming for us to Super Shang-Chi village We must we must fight with finally lured some Jews over there like we got our own The Chinese Jews made a manufactured a knockoff Jew so though I think the Chinese Jews are killing it. They manufactured a knockoff Jew. So though in... What is... Like a hexagon, yeah. Yeah, he's smaller and more compact than a typical Jew.
Starting point is 00:25:10 Why he not have big nose? Big nose! Boi-oi-oi-oi, right? It's a portal. It's a new portal Jew. Because he has a big penis. Yeah, I got there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:20 Yeah, so... Was that joke boring? Yeah, it was very boring. Things have changed dramatically since 2019 this year Godzilla X Kong is the only Hollywood movie to rank among the top 10 highest grossing movies and last year No, Hollywood movie was in the top 10. What was is a first since 2011? What was in the top 10 of the air? Yeah, yeah, Fast and Furious gotta be not last year, last year no movie was in the top 10 from Hollywood.
Starting point is 00:25:47 Yeah, but what was? Just Chinese shit? Yeah, all Chinese shit. You can't even pronounce it? What's it about? What's the number one? Well, right now. What do they wanna see over there?
Starting point is 00:25:54 They're doing a lot of, they do a lot of historical action movies. They love The Great Wall, they love Chinese good. They love martial arts shit, but they're also doing a lot of comedies and stuff and stuff again this movie really yeah successor Chinese version of comedy That guy walking down the street everyone going big like like like for like three hours I was gonna make a peepee in your coke joke, but I made one of those last night It didn't go over well did it I love that joke. I don't care if it goes over. That's hilarious
Starting point is 00:26:22 A lot of Chinese guys peeing in cokes. It's their favorite thing. Anyway guys, appealing to the Chinese market is currently number 192 with 345 up votes. Vote it up. Voting up. Still a problem. We're still appealing. Yeah, well we appeal in other ways. Somebody told me that You know that game Apex Legends? Not really. Well anyway, they made a mobile version of it, but If you showed me pornography from it, I would know.
Starting point is 00:26:50 Sure. Well actually all the characters look like shit. But uh... Oh, how about that Concord thing? It's interesting. Did you see my tweet today that I tried to buy it and I can't? That thing's gonna be expensive. Yeah, it's already getting scouting. I went to Best Buy and they had six copies on the shelf. Oh, and I was like, oh cool I'll get these I'll throw them on eBay and they're like, oh, we can't sell it out. It's not in the system And I was like, yeah
Starting point is 00:27:13 Should've stole some some trans allies if they have a copy would you could say trans allies? You're an ally. It's a trans game. Yeah, it is Who else bought it? Who bought that shit? No one. That's why it's after a week. They've discontinued the game It's a game or on the character select screen even show anybody. I don't know anybody No, that looks like shit, dude I don't know how you spend eight years on a game and don't focus test it and just bring in a bunch of teenage boys To go. Yeah, I didn't like the fat black chick with her pronouns on the character select screen. Yeah, I would rather play Call of Duty Yeah
Starting point is 00:27:52 Dude they have they have like previous sketches of nobody had kids at the entire company I don't I guess I was like trying to figure out if they're based out of Washington is a Bellevue Washington That's what happened to McDonald's was gonna get Pokemon for their Happy Meal toys Yeah, they're marketing guys a bunch of gay dudes. No, like this is this is stupid a monster in your pocket Is this about AIDS so they passed and Burger King got it? Well now McDonald's has it again. Oh they do Yeah, they put out the they've they've since gotten it though. Those Burger King's Pokemon toys were great though. We amazing we lucked out Yeah, I wish I still had all those.
Starting point is 00:28:26 I don't. Those were a lot of fun. Guys, another voted up from all the way back in episode 12. We haven't talked about this in a long time. Tell me if you even remember this problem. Master Erasure. Oh yeah. Yeah, I remember that.
Starting point is 00:28:39 Removing the terms like master and slave. Now I'm used to saying main, like checking into the main branch. Oh really? Yeah, I totally forgot about master., like checking into the main branch. Oh, really? Yeah, because you get in trouble if you... They just all changed it. Like all the services, like code services, just swapped it. Well, Epic Games has put out a new Unreal Engine coding standard document,
Starting point is 00:28:57 which mandates inclusive word choice for coders, which does include things like master and slave, but also some that you might not have experienced before. One example from the document is do not use metaphors or similes that reinforce stereotypes examples including blacklist and whitelist. That's not gonna stick. That's a hard one to get rid of. Getting rid of whitelist and blacklist? Come on. Allowlist? No, that's not the same. Getting rid of whitelist and blacklist? Come on. Allowlist?
Starting point is 00:29:26 No, that's not the same. Do not use words that refer to historical trauma or lived experience. Slave and master, okay. But here's one. Nuke. Nuke? You can't say nuke that. That's not happening.
Starting point is 00:29:38 Cause you know, Japanese people. You have to say holocaust it. Holocaust that thing out of there. You have to say remember the holocaust. Every time you want to clear a hard drive. Take that code, throw it in the oven. Cause we're done with that one. Halt and catch fire.
Starting point is 00:29:52 And also guys, do not use collective nouns that assume gender. For instance, avoid colloquial phrases like, well that's just a poor man's version of Mario. Cause that infers, not only is that hurtful to the poor, but it's hurtful because it assumes a poor person would be a man or oh Can't say oh, it's a poor woman's version. I say it's a poor white man. Who's a racist then you're gonna probably get some extra points Master erasure still say don't hire Indians
Starting point is 00:30:19 Is that okay code that in is that at the top of your document if any Indians are reading this code? You're gonna fuck it up. Leave it alone get out of here guys master erasure currently a big 108 with 468 up votes Why don't you go and vote it out? Okay? When are they gonna change the thing on your phone to dark mode? To like African American mode? Please go to the website. You joke, but like-
Starting point is 00:30:54 I'm not joking. Yeah, I was gonna say that's- And be nice to Vito. If somebody told me they're gonna start doing that. Be nice to Vito. Only nice chats to Vito. Please go and just vote it. Again, anyone can make Stinger. Just like anyone at all. Vito, we are lovey-d Vito. Oh. Again, anyone can make stingers.
Starting point is 00:31:05 Like, anyone at all. Anything. At this point, they don't want to get banned. At this point, I would just take a fun MIDI with you saying Voted Up over it. You know? You think maybe if you made like one stinger, people would like it? I made a bunch of stingers. I'll make more.
Starting point is 00:31:23 Maybe if there's no fat jokes and super chats You'll make a stinger. Maybe that's maybe that's the way to do it. Okay. Well, you're the big winner. Yeah Speaking of all that shit you were talking about. Here's my problem Hail, nah Let me pull this out. Let's pull it up. Oh, hell nah, you know, I have a medical condition What's what's yeah, you gotta man if I don't know I have a medical condition? What's, what's, yeah? You got a medical condition? If I don't, uh, if I don't see at least one fat black woman every day, uh, I'll die. Oh shit, that's hard.
Starting point is 00:31:52 Yeah, isn't that crazy? But you can, you can see them in media and then it qualifies, you don't have to see them on the street. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so you just gotta tune in. I don't have to go to like the Waffle House or anything. I just have to see, if I don't see a fat black lady once every day I will die something horrible has happened. So I was gonna die like how do you fried worms? But is how to see fat black I was gonna die I was gonna die into this problem and then the Minecraft trailer came out. Yes, I I see it
Starting point is 00:32:19 I don't even have to hear it anymore. I just see it in your head Hell no, oh, thank God. You can hear it in your head. Oh hell naw. I'm like oh hell naw. Oh thank God. Thank God, Minecraft, you saved my life. I can live another day of having to seek out and find a fat black woman. Thank God. It's a very important part of our culture.
Starting point is 00:32:36 Oh hell naw. Oh hell naw, Steve. Oh hell naw. I don't even need, I know it's in there. It's gonna be. It's like Arnold Schwarzenegger, I'll be back, I'm gonna go to the movie. Where is it? Where is it? Where? Oh hell no! I'm out, thanks.
Starting point is 00:32:49 It'll be in there, or there will be some modern variation. No, it'll always be that. It's like Chekhov's gun. It's a rule in Hollywood, if you have a fat black lady- There's a fat black lady in the scene. By the way, skinny black women are the hottest women that there- You know how many fucking big titty skinny black women I follow on Instagram? Fucking tons. None of them are faking you out with those fake They don't have the fake. I don't think they make do they make black versions of the big fake boobs? They must not. I don't think they do
Starting point is 00:33:18 They're not using them tits enormous. Yeah hot as hell and I've never heard one of them say Oh, hell no. They also don't really need them a lot of the blanks. I've noticed don't say They have large not s don't put you don't put s on a race the black community. Yes He said the Jews right I wouldn't well Like I get the Mexicans the Mexican community say Mexicans Like I get the Mexican the Mexican community say Mexicans You know it's coming oh Yeah, I know the second I saw the trailer know me I said I understand what happened a scriptwriter sat down He said all right who could react to the the situation of your placed into the Minecraft world
Starting point is 00:34:03 And how would they react? Gonna be a Chinese? Trace of squares? Oh hell nah! Where's it gonna be? That's what I wonder. Where's the hell nah gonna be? Yeah, what will she react to that will give the oh hell nah? What's hell nah in here? The sun? That's pretty fucking weird. It'll probably be like a skeleton archer, you know, pops off around a tree and starts shooting arrows. Oh hell nah!
Starting point is 00:34:23 Yes, that could be. that's a good guess. Or the first time a creeper explodes, it explodes, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it could be, I think, all right. Oh hell no! Right? It would be a situation where maybe she's lured into like, say she goes, look at that little green thing over there, that looks pretty fun.
Starting point is 00:34:37 And then it explodes and kills like a bunch of villagers. She goes, oh hell no! And they all start running in the other direction. You know, really the reason that I'm bringing it as a problem is because it's setting us as a culture and all of the race is back by engaging in a minstrel show. It's Hollywood writers writing, it's out of date, it's out of date racist, performative, stereotypical language. And it's very offensive.
Starting point is 00:35:04 So I don't want to see it in movies anymore. Okay. And go ahead and make her skinny as well. Because it's actually racist also that she's fat. Well that's why this is so fascinating, is like, people's ability to recognize... When I see a fat black woman in a movie, I go, Oh hell no! There's a lot of people who I've seen post...
Starting point is 00:35:23 I think even Nick Fuentes kind of got confused. Where he said, are you fucking kidding me? He's like, what are they doing? And I see a lot of these guys on Twitter and they're going, oh, they woked up the Minecraft movie that's going to be woke. And I went, guys, a big fat black lady going, what the hell going on in this Minecraft shit is like the least woke thing you will ever experience That's literally just actually kind of racist which is fine. Yeah, it's like a good racist stereotype
Starting point is 00:35:53 It's the best racist stereotype. No it's not. It's one of the good ones. Put this skinny one with the big tits in there on OnlyFans. That's not a stereotype. I know I don't want stereotypes in the movie I want to break stereotypes by putting a sexy black woman in there You know that I can get off a house out of get out of here. What is that tree turning into a into a square? Oh? Hell no Jason my mom. Oh hell no. I bitches be crazy open this minecraft. You're doing too much though Doing it. I don't know you'recraft you're doing too much though You're doing too much racist stuff, sorry well they get to do you know the movie gets
Starting point is 00:36:41 The Jews are all going yeah, we know how to make movies like are you kidding me man? We know what the hell Yeah, where's the last all oh hell no, I'm gonna have to hear. The day of my death. I honestly- I do have that medical condition. I think that's gonna be in the movie and they knew they couldn't put it in the trailer because I think if you put it in the trailer you do get a bunch of people going, well this is just another- because it seems like Topsy Turvy world, I'm seeing people defending her and going, well she's an Academy Award winning actress. I go, yeah but they still hired her to be the oh hell nah lady She's not gonna turn in an Oscar winning performance. What was your role in that? Oh hell nah?
Starting point is 00:37:11 I was studying. I was in a hell nah at Juilliard. Oh really? Oh yeah, I can give you a 20 different inflections of hell nah Like Henry Higgins, you know what you talking about they still do that I don't know are we do that? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I don't know. Are we gonna get an mm-hmm? I'm fine with that. I think she punched- I think she punches out, you know, like a creeper.
Starting point is 00:37:32 She goes, Mm-hmm. That's fine. Alright. No, that's fine. We'll get one of those. It's the Hellknot. I want a director's cut.
Starting point is 00:37:38 With 20 Hellknots. The Hellknot Criterion Collection. It is- it is one of these things, you know. I think when you're writing a script, you go, well, yeah, what is the- Did you write it? What is the pinnacle Ah Hellna moment? Because they can go kinda anywhere.
Starting point is 00:37:53 Oy vey, right? Oh, whoops, I mean Hellna. You don't know exactly the best place to drop it in. It's really got to be at a climax moment. You need one, it's like a fuck in a PG-13 movie. It is literally the fuck in a PG-13 movie. You get one Hellna. You get one it's like a fuck in a PG-13 movie. It is literally the fuck in a PG-13 movie. You get one hell nah. Yeah, one hell nah.
Starting point is 00:38:07 And a guy's sitting there and he's looking at the script and he's going, oh god I mean I could put it here but maybe during the climactic battle or oh maybe it should be an interch between. That's gonna really, no it's gonna remove all the tension. Yeah I know. If you put the hell nah when the albatross shows up. Or like maybe they have to dress up as Minecraft characters and he shows her. He goes, oh this is your creeper costume. Oh hell nah! And a hard cut to her wearing it. See that's just, it can go anywhere.
Starting point is 00:38:34 It's good. Oh hell nah! I bet Jason Momoa will just steal it knowing him. If Jason Momoa steals the hell nah. Oh hell nah! No no no no no. If that wooden acting fuck tries to take the hell nah I was a black woman. I don't know man cuz he's just what is he always goofing around
Starting point is 00:38:51 It's one of these things where like remember when our old swords nigger first showed up and like he probably couldn't act but then he kind Of figured it out dubbed him. Yeah, they dubbed. They always had him not acting. Yeah, it turned out. He was hilarious Yeah, cuz he's hilarious That was the thing is like just can't act's hilarious. Not that funny Jason Momoa. He doesn't he doesn't have that natural He might be funny, but he tries so hard I want to write him a fan letter like hey, man, everyone come everyone says that I look like you Can you please stop acting like such an asshole for both of us? Thanks. I don't Swartzenegger was hilarious Yeah, you ever watch that a pumping iron documentary. Oh, hilarious. Yeah. Ever watch that pumping iron documentary?
Starting point is 00:39:25 Oh yeah. Yeah. It's great. What was Jason Momoa before he said- Walking out for me is like calming. You know, just every time it's like calming. And you're like, I just want to hear this Austrian guy talk about how- I think that might be the worst Arnold Schwarzenegger impression of ever.
Starting point is 00:39:38 I'm really bad at all impressions. Get Carl to come in and do all the fucking impressions. Mad Cucks has a good one. Mad Cucks has a good Arnold? Mad Cucks has a good Arnold. I'm terrible at impressions. Alright, ah hell no. Was it not enough ah hell no's? Vote it up.
Starting point is 00:39:54 Everyone knows what we're talking about. Alright. I hear it in my dreams. My girlfriend wakes me up, she was like, I'm covered in sweat. She's like, you were just going, ah hell no. Ah hell no. Ah hell no. She was well. I'm covered in sweat. She's like you're just going oh hell no Oh hell no because it just sticks with you. It's just one of those things. It's got such an energy to it Well dick. I'll tell you what problem. I've been going through now. I don't know
Starting point is 00:40:21 Shut up. I don't know if you're like me or at least as a young boy I was a big fan as a young boy Trying to think what would you be as a young boy. I was a big fan as a young boy Trying to think what would you be as a young boy? Just a little asshole. Yeah causing trouble. Well, I as a young man Loved going to the local mall. I was a bit of a mall rat. What time period was that? Let's see. Well honestly like five years you're like five years younger than me, aren't you? Yeah. So let's see.
Starting point is 00:40:47 You have Spencer's? My, well, we. Or Julius? They had, my local mall. So there was my mall, which was a little smaller. And then there was like the super good mall. The super good mall definitely had Spencer's. I loved the Spencer's.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Yeah. My mall was a little. Your piercing store? They had Claire's. Did you have a pet store? That's the decider. Did you have a pet store? That's the decider. Did you have a pet store in your mall? The pet store was...
Starting point is 00:41:09 Because they wiped them out during my lifetime. We had a pet store and it was fucking amazing. Even though I look sad thinking about pet stores now, but as a kid it's like, oh fuck yeah. The dead mall had a pet store and the big mall across, up the highway had a pet store. So yeah, I remember the pet store. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:26 I remember when it hit the puppy mill idea, and you'd go and you'd see the puppies, and you're like, oh, they're not supposed to be doing this. I'd say, look, honestly- Hamsters and shit were fun enough, but I guess you can't pay rent with hamsters and guinea pigs. Well, you can get money for a puppy. What, like $600, $800?
Starting point is 00:41:41 Yeah. Yeah. I don't want to think about it. It's a whole thing. I probably started going to the mall probably in 90, well let's see, the Pokemon card game. Started going in 1996. Okay. And my local, we had a store called Media Play, which is kind of like just like a Borders bookstore or whatever. Yeah. They had the Pokemon Trading Card League, so you could go and you could win promo cards or whatever
Starting point is 00:42:07 Wow, so every weekend I was at the mall playing Pokemon cards. Did anyone ever get molested? Yeah, we all got molested at the Pokemon Anybody getting molested at Pokemon card league but that seems like ripe for molesting No, I think it was run by some it was like 22 year old guys running running it. It's just like some, they're not really, yeah, cause the game is new. So the older guys are not going to learn how to play it. It's like, I'm going to church. I'm not learning how to play this. There's a bunch of 20 year olds being like, yeah, you guys want, honestly, the worst thing now, thinking, you know, Pokemon cards are worth a fortune. Yeah. Okay. So I remember back, it was run by just like two skeevy like college guys You didn't give a shit, and they're like yeah
Starting point is 00:42:46 Yeah, they sent us these promos like you guys are supposed to like you know play each other to get them But we don't give a shit uh-huh so they were just giving us stacks of like Hundreds of Pokemon promo cards the only six kids who showed up you ones Yeah, the muse like I had at one point like a hundred of holo foil muse And I'm like oh god those are worth a fucking fortune if I'd kept all of those what the fuck happened to them cuz they didn't give a shit they're like yeah whatever there's only six of you like take whatever you want and a million EVs and P whatever's and then I ended up working at the mall I worked at the GameStop and then I ended up
Starting point is 00:43:19 what happened all your Pokemon cards I still have a lot of have a lot of them yeah I should ever tell you that my nephew found all my Pokemon cards? What do you mean? I was going nuts. I had lost them. I had shitloads from like 1999, whenever they first came out. First edition, like some, a bunch, right? All holograph, multiple sets of the base set and stuff like that. But I just wrote them off. I could never find them.
Starting point is 00:43:43 In my house, in my old house, right on my home. Right. And my mom calls me one day and she goes, look what your nephew found. And it's all the Pokemon cards. Where'd he find them? And I don't know, he's crawling around. Like fucking John McClane. He's like, look what I found.
Starting point is 00:43:56 And I said, oh my God, put him on the phone right away. And I said, hey, those are very expensive. Don't touch them. Don't fuck with those. Don't touch them, don't let Nana touch them, okay? Yeah. He goes, yeah, got it. So I went up there Did you run over there to make sure he's not putting his grubby hands all over? Oh, no, you know, okay, I didn't want putting the grubby hands on so I said hey, where's the cards? He shows me I said, all right
Starting point is 00:44:16 Where's the ones that you stole? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA I'm gonna buy you a box for your honesty, but just so you know honesty is not rewarded other times in your life. Normally this is not good. Don't steal from me. Don't ever steal from me. Steal from the star. Other people. Steal from the target as we all know.
Starting point is 00:44:34 Other people, not me. Yeah, so I got them all back. I should have brought my new suitcase. I got one of those like suitcases that you can keep all the cards in there and everything. Oh yeah. So I'm going through. I should show you my Pokemon card. you'd probably find some cool stuff in there. Maybe maybe we grade them It's got a little slot for women's numbers Well, I had it in the one thing I held on to most of my Pokemon cards
Starting point is 00:44:54 the only ones was I started working at the card store at the mall and To make a little extra money. I had a binder of all my old Pokemon cards So I would have people come in and be like yeah Give me eight pucks, and you can take that or whatever. So I probably sold some good stuff that I shouldn't have. Yeah. But I got a bunch of Charizard's and whatever the fuck else. Okay, so what's your problem?
Starting point is 00:45:13 The point is, Dick, we're reminiscing about all these great mall memories. I know, I just realized how long it was. Oh, the mall, okay. Yes, and now I go to the mall, now I go to a mall and it's either there's no stores or there's stores selling Funko pops that seems to be the only malls I can find So my problem dick is of course and losing the American shopping mall. It was a great experience. It was a communal place The first completely enclosed mall was the Southdale regional shopping center open in Minneapolis in
Starting point is 00:45:44 1956 and ever since then these have been places for get-togethers the Southdale Regional Shopping Center, opened in Minneapolis in 1956. And ever since then, these have been places for get-togethers, entertainment, fashion. This is where you get your music, get your CDs, your records, teen hangouts, and even holiday traditions. Remember going to the mall to see Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny? Yeah, everyone is a weird fuck now,
Starting point is 00:46:01 because we don't have anywhere to go. Any communal spaces at all. It's just Discord, where you're talking about fucking Pedophiles yeah, I used to go to the mall every week to like hang out and again the card store at board games I went to board game night or whatever else or you just meet your friends them all you go Let's go to the mall. You know go listen to some records If you were Ava Tyson and you're trying to give kids pornography at the mall someone would see that if I invited you to the mall You would say no because what are we gonna do at a mall? Wait? What do you mean now?
Starting point is 00:46:30 Yeah, I'm saying if it was like maybe 20 years ago. Yeah, yeah, fuck it. Let's go to the mall They're playing arcade games. Yeah, exactly Playing NBA Jam the mall has a fallen apart Dick malls are no longer being built in America. In the mid 1990s, malls were being constructed at a rate of 140 a year. 140 new malls every year. In 2007, a year before the Great Recession,
Starting point is 00:46:56 no new malls were built in America for the first time in 50 years. And the last mall, do you know when the last mall was built? Probably 2000, I'm gonna guess. It's actually 2012. 2012? Was the last time anyone's built a mall. Obama.
Starting point is 00:47:13 Cause it's the worst. Killed malls. Well pretty much, yeah. Pretty much. Well why is this dick? Obviously online shopping. That's stupid, no one needs to talk about that. But, couple interesting things that I did not consider the average shopper actually
Starting point is 00:47:27 Tends to enjoy the big box stores more than a mall People would rather go to a Walmart or a Target cuz they just buy yeah Cuz you can just park your car and walk in you don't have to walk through a bunch of hallways to find what the fuck You're looking for yeah, and your wife doesn't want to go. Yeah, I'm going to Home Depot. I hate Home Depot Okay, I'll see you later People again like parking in and they also find lower prices without the overhead of a traditional mall If you're in a mall, you're paying a lot of rent and then your four your prices are not very good You want something tells me you want to like open a video game store in a mall
Starting point is 00:47:59 Is that a dream of yours? I would I would uh, well, well. I don't want to. Something tells me I'm close to the target. So I have shut up. I shut up. I have a buddy. Who owns the card store in the mall. You're like fucking Kramer. Okay. Your buddy's Bob Sacramento.
Starting point is 00:48:22 I have a buddy. Yeah. While at Bob Sacramento. Where's that knife guys? pvk.com. He was like, I was. I have a buddy. Yeah, well Bob Sacamano. Where's that knife? Guys, pvk.com. He was like, I was going to make a promo code for you idiots. I'm like, wow, it's too late for that. Ah, make a promo code. Okay. Anyway, uh, my buddy owns the card store in the mall back in Massachusetts. It's been one of these things. Pokemon cards. They got Pokemon cards. They got magic cards. He no no sports cards, but all the other things board games and stuff sports cards who the fuck's gonna buy sports cards That's a great question. There are people still doing it for some reason. I guess basketball is huge
Starting point is 00:48:56 I you know what am I saying sports is huge. There's a yeah right now. There's in Pokemon So I don't know I was actually watching a funny thing because the new set what Jason will black Pokemon, so I don't know. I was actually watching a funny thing, cause the new set, Jason Wublecki or Wem- I don't fucking know. There's some new player that everyone's excited about, and there was like a one-of-one rookie card in all the boxes. When has that not been true? Yeah, well, whatever. There's some new rookie card that everybody was trying to get,
Starting point is 00:49:19 but then somebody already got it, and now all the guys who sell basketball cards are pissed cause they can't sell the boxes anymore because nobody wants them. Oh, yeah Card yeah anyway once I quit this show I will end up owning part of that in a card store in the mall, and then you'll be able to watch me Why what do you have like a she's my buddy? It's a man's deal or something. What do you mean? I? he's just he's my buddy. It's a man's deal or something. What do you mean? I he's just he's my buddy. And so you own half his stuff. What the hell are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:49:51 It's one of these situations where he's you know, he's not making the best run of it. And I'm like, you're gonna put money. I'm like I could come in. I think you're in a really good area. We could be selling online a little more. Oh, that's a good idea. Where is his store? It's in Massachusetts.
Starting point is 00:50:09 Running like a whatnot box breaking platform out of his store. That's what I would do. You could make millions of dollars with that. I absolutely know that, yes. You gotta actually do it though. He's in Massachusetts. Can't be arguing online with people about.
Starting point is 00:50:20 He's in Massachusetts. You should do that here. Why don't you? I mean, I've been- He's in Massachusetts. You should do that here. Why don't you? I mean, I've been... That's a winner. I've been selling on whatnot. I went to a buddy of mine who's a distributor and I said, listen, I don't know which Pokemon
Starting point is 00:50:33 sets are hot. Bro, you need to get a warehouse out where it's cheap, put free ping pong lessons. And then when the Chinese women drop their kids off you say no ping pong We buck we breaking packs we breaking packs break packs, and then you walk around with a ruler Yeah, I don't think and they just cracking packs all day right. I don't think that and you say Ping-pong yeah, and then when the moms come out you like how and yeah Ping-pong yeah, and then when the moms come out you like how and yeah Kill your mom if you fuck they're doing opening open open open you know for backspin
Starting point is 00:51:15 It would be I would be that's a good idea, and he's got he's got an employee. I've said hey You know that guy who works for you. He's real funny. You should have run auctions or whatever I'm trying to help him through it Trying to help him figure out how to make some money. Is this like your Shawshank Redemption plan? Like you're Morgan Freeman and your buddy's Tim Robbins? It's kind of been this thing where it's like if Vito didn't leave Massachusetts he would own part of that card store right now. It's like the understanding. Everybody knows that. Everybody knows that there's an alternate universe where Vito bought the card store
Starting point is 00:51:42 at the mall. I worked there for like five, six years. Who's everybody? Everybody, everybody. You're from here back home? Everybody, the whole town. They all know. Have you done your 30 year reunion yet for high school?
Starting point is 00:51:51 They don't, I don't know what happened. They won't do a reunion. It's weird. Is it white supremacy? Well, it would have been a 20 year reunion, but they just didn't do one. No, wait, we didn't do a 10 year reunion. I guess my 20 year reunion would be- You didn't have like a tight ass-
Starting point is 00:52:02 No, there would have been a 20 year reunion. We didn't do it sucks everybody from my Hometown isn't the same Including apparently the co-host of the anything else podcast I just don't have to talk to that guy about that Elijah Schaefer No, the guy you went on the show with the guy with the hat. Oh, yeah. He told me that. Yeah He said he's from my hometown
Starting point is 00:52:21 Yeah And Phil that remain you know Phil that remains who came in and now no longer follows us cuz we talk shit about Tim Poole all the time Well, he's a fed. He's a Russian asset. Okay. What do you want us to do? That guy worked at the same card store at my mall That's our connection is that he worked at the card store ten years before I did So you're gonna be like Sam from Cheers, but with this shitty. Yeah, this Pokemon card store, and I'm gonna run box breaks Well What's all the fire five year plan comic shit falls apart? It's my backup plan
Starting point is 00:52:53 I think it's either that I'm working in the knife warehouse. It's one of those two things I always got my it's like quite a retirement plan. I'd have fun selling well I'd also bring video games back into that store You know the reason I have all those video game consoles is he's the guy well. He's the guy I bought them all from So you sell them back to him? Yeah, basically honestly I said that to him and he's like you know what honestly Because he sold them all to me for like nothing and now they've like other price of video games has gone through the roof And I'm like hey you want to buy all that stock back, and he's like oh god
Starting point is 00:53:22 I got it before everything crashes Hey, you want to buy all that stock back? And he's like, oh god, I kind of- Yeah, unload it before everything crashes. I'm selling stuff. Stuff's getting sold. Guys, whatnot.com slash invite slash veto comedy. Get $15 off your first whatnot purchase. Come buy some Magic Cards.
Starting point is 00:53:36 15 bucks? You can buy like two packs of Magic Cards for 15 bucks. But you said off the first purchase. Yeah, buy two packs of Magic Cards for me for free by signing up. What? They just give you $15 in credit to sign up. It's insane. Oh Yeah, free magic packs. Okay sign up with my invite code What the fuck? I might already signed up fuck and they just sent me an email Which is everybody who has the $15 credit on their account and hasn't spent it yet
Starting point is 00:54:00 Yeah as an incentive they're gonna send them all an extra $10 for some reason hasn't spent it yet. As an incentive they're gonna send them all an extra ten dollars for some reason. So you're gonna get $25 for buying anything. It's a fun platform. I like it. No boring jokes though. No boring jokes on there. Just magic. Well a guy came in and he started going, hey pig fucking pig piece of shit. And I banned him and he sent me an email about he was mad I banned him. And I'm like, what do you want? I'm trying to what do you want?
Starting point is 00:54:25 I'm trying to sell magic cards, it's a different show It's not the biggest problem magic card show, it's my show Save that for here And he sent me this big long email I signed up for what not because you told me to come buy your magic cards I just showed up and I said piggy piggy oink oink and then you banned me for some reason Not the time. It's not the right time. I'm trying to sell it's a different situation An interesting situ an interesting thing about the malls though
Starting point is 00:54:54 Is that actually the real estate industry was just buying more places to shop than the actual rate of growth for the American population They're gonna have to make them into like homeless zoos or prisons That's what they're doing right now They're turning these malls into Holocaust is gonna be Mexicans and it's gonna take place in mall in dead malls with barbed wire And they're gonna go like I think that could I am a mayor the white supremacist Trump Did a Holocaust on all the Mexicans you ever go to one of the malls that has a go-kart race? Did a holocaust on all the Mexicans you ever go to one of the malls that has a go-kart race Go-kart track inside the mall. No, well that was something that happened again to my local mall because they're just like we have no idea We'll give it to anyone. Yeah, you ever go to a mall that had a paintball range inside the mall
Starting point is 00:55:35 No, that'd be cool though. Like Call of Duty that I remember was really weird in like the 2000s They're like, yeah, this is this part this they took the craft store Yeah You know the old ladies buying yarn and they said now it's just a paintball store 2000s they're like yeah this is this but this they took the craft store yeah you know the old ladies buying yarn and they said now it's just a paintball store and the cool thing was that they had the they still the big glass windows yeah so everybody would just be watching them play paintball as the windows are just getting soaked that's cool yeah it was awesome I'm surprised that didn't catch on but yeah malls are now being converted to offices clinics education
Starting point is 00:56:02 centers residential housing I went to that dead mall where part of it is a like clinic for prisoners so half the mall is covered in barbed wire for some fucking reason. And I'm like, I was like, can I go in the mall? This looks like it's locked down. It has like a shifting gate or whatever and they're like, oh yeah, part of the mall is just a prison intake facility now. They're pretty secure. I think Aaron Imholz in there getting checked out. How's that guy doing? My problem dig I loved malls I had a lot of fun in the mall a lot of great memories in the mall and you know what I'm gonna end up when this
Starting point is 00:56:31 Show ends when I get fired and replaced with ether owl for whatever the fuck else You guys will find me at x9 games in Hadley, Massachusetts Where I'm told they're currently sold out of enemy weapons, so I have to send them another Massachusetts where I'm told they're currently sold out of enemy weapons, so I have to send him another Weapon owned by the great Seth Yatin guys. He just had just make millions of dollars doing box breaking You don't have to tolerate any shit about I love I love opening the packs of cards. It's a lot of fun Yeah, I will say my buddy Seth just had a big help and he had a big health thing. We Help he was in the hospital for a for like a week or something so... He tried to start exercising or something?
Starting point is 00:57:08 If for some reason... He's not as... He's not like a... I haven't seen him in a while I don't know what he's looking like. Yeah. I'm just saying if anybody's in Hadley and you want to go buy some Magic Cards, please go to X9 Games. What is up with all these fucking ads? Like the knife guy is like the fucking... Well I wasn't gonna do an ad. This is like the most Italian shit I've ever seen out of you
Starting point is 00:57:27 Eh, well we got started talking about him and now I'm getting sentimental Well, you know, maybe if I can get him some- Is the ozempic making you? Either one I just uh, I just love everybody and I want everybody to succeed Are you going to do like ozempic menopause? Somebody said ozempic makes you very emotional You know who I really want to succeed in life My good friend mint salad
Starting point is 00:57:50 You an excellent artist an excellent entertainer, I'm not joking I Didn't do her dirt. What I? Did her dirty I did a horrible thing like I'm not gonna. There's such an asshole. I'm not an asshole to her I was just trying to be an asshole to Riley and I by making fun of her no Videos look I'll tell you do that. Here's I didn't make fun of her videos I'm sure her videos are fine fine the view counts. I made fun of Riley who was telling me veto You don't know how to promote You know you're bad at YouTube
Starting point is 00:58:23 Yeah, you know you don't know you you're bad at YouTube, and you don't know how to promote, you know, you're bad at YouTube, you know, you're bad at YouTube and you don't know how to get views. He said, you know, you can't get people watching your stuff or whatever else. And I said, well, here's a channel that you definitely manage. It's MintSalad's channel and it doesn't get a lot of views, so why the fuck are you lecturing me? But why don't you know that that's like not necessary to say? Why is he saying all this shit?
Starting point is 00:58:43 Why does he say whatever? Anyway. Because he just talks shit. I was not trying to say why is he saying all this shit? Why does he say whatever anyway? Just talk shit. I was not trying to insult mint salad I was trying to insult Riley's abilities to promote mint salad. I think you're gonna have to deal with this either way That's like I don't think he's taking you know I support both these guys I support mint salad and Riley are like in shitting on her for like three hours. What did I shit on her? What did I say that was shitting on her? Well three hours. I should honor. What did I should honor about? What did I say that was shitting honor? Well, I didn't I don't memorize it What did I say that was bad about her all I said was Riley?
Starting point is 00:59:14 You are in like okay. I hope you're a huge success. I've done nothing but support you. Oh wait actually I have a clip of what you said, okay, okay? Yeah, mint salad beef. You were you and mint salad Big fight. Best friends. No. Let's start with that. Let's talk about mint salad. I'm not fighting with mint salad We all love mint salad. That's it end of story. Any any fight is one-sided. I Oh-ho
Starting point is 00:59:44 I'm not. who said that? Who says that? And who says beef is one sided? Who says that? Who? Who's the guy that? Is it an Armenian guy or is it a different guy? Oh, no, a black guy.
Starting point is 00:59:55 The black guy says that. All the beef with me is one sided. Oh, hell nah, white boy. That beef is one sided. I didn't even cook the other side. Beef is still raw. This fits. I wish you even cook the other side of that beef. It's still raw! Let's see how this fits. I wish I could sell the best. She's great.
Starting point is 01:00:09 She's so great. That's why I asked her to help me out. One of her trading cards is a part of my comic book campaign. There you go. She did a great job. And everybody's back. That was a long time ago though. Now you're fighting back. SuperColor is getting a mint salad trading card. Everybody getting a trading card!
Starting point is 01:00:25 I wouldn't have known if I didn't think she could, you know, draw Mint salad's my best friend! I wouldn't ask her to do if I didn't think she could draw Yeah That's what that fight- If she was a shitty artist I wouldn't ask her to make a trading card I'd ask her to take a picture of herself or something That could have been good, that could have been a good card actually
Starting point is 01:00:43 She'd have had her dress up and a costume Okay the here's more that you had to say about her I would get Riley in here, too, but I haven't you know I love both those guys Riley and men are great Except you say that but you like don't really act like it. You know yeah, what do you mean? What do you mean? How do you make a trading card for the comic book? That was like a year ago when your comic was due. This is like, you know, now. That was a long time ago.
Starting point is 01:01:12 Min, I sent you the link. If you want to come in here, a lot of people would be interested in what you have to say about this. I gave Min my phone number. I said, why don't you call me? I'll apologize in person. That phone number shit, that phone shit is not everyone's favorite way to communicate. It's the only way to do an apology. You can't apologize with text. It doesn't work. No.
Starting point is 01:01:31 When have you ever had a successful text apology? I don't care about apologies though. Well you're telling me how to do it. You're saying. No, because like it's like it's taking up too much time of someone's Like get on the phone get on the phone so I can apologize like man I got shit to do just say you got shit to do so you'll call me some other time I always have shit to do you I have no time for call ever honestly This is probably gonna be the only place I can apologize because I can you know and have inflection and in human tone And I will say
Starting point is 01:02:05 You let me hear the rest of this very fucking man And I don't know I mean I'm hoping that things get resolved here and I don't want to steal the thunder of the biggest problem in the universe Tomorrow, which is gonna be I don't think you are I don't think meant was gonna come in on biggest problem Yeah, you just get around you know, it's pissing me off, but I'm streaming myself. That's what Mint said. Mint's streaming. How do you do both?
Starting point is 01:02:29 How do you do it? I guess she's watching him. Maybe she's dual streaming. Yeah. Well, Mint, obviously I support you. You think that came across as good? I'm not talking to her. Obviously I support you.
Starting point is 01:02:45 She's gotta come on so I can apologize to her. So you would change your tone and what you were saying if you're talking behind her back to someone? When have I talked behind her back? Right there! Right there! Have I ever come to you and said anything bad about Mintzal? No, no, no, no, no. But what was that that I just heard? That was in front of a bunch of people as she's in the chat talking. It's not behind her fucking back I want you to succeed. I don't know. I don't know what this fight is about but uh
Starting point is 01:03:14 You don't have any clue I Understand that she's upset that I was again Trying to say that Riley is bad at managing YouTube channels by using her channel as an example. What other YouTube channel do they have? laughter It's got his, it's his production company. It's ASE Presents. Which everyone should subscribe to.
Starting point is 01:03:38 I've given you my phone number, I wish you would just call me, we could hash it out. But uh, doesn't seem like you wanna handle it that way. I don't know. can I it's called escalating I think it's a great apology that's why there's so much more of it here it's so good do you want more well I can all I can say is I want I want all my friends to succeed including mint salad who was a dear friend of mine and I think people should subscribe to her on YouTube at ASC presents okay because Riley's doing a bad job but it's got nothing to do with
Starting point is 01:04:10 men it's Riley who can't promote and that's that's I hope he figures it out you know you haven't you were you glad that when he got arrested no okay I was confused when he got arrested oh yeah here again, it's one of these things where, you know, meant goes that I'm not grateful enough to her because, you know, she told her audience to buy the comic book. So it all comes down to, you know, Vito isn't grateful. And then said, you know, you don't promote my YouTube enough. She did say that she said, I don't promote her.
Starting point is 01:04:42 So a lot of this just comes down to Vito doesn't do enough for other people. I mean, look, I've been very busy working on the comic. I know nobody believes me on that. But I am. And if I, you know, do a bad job of promoting my friends, I tell my friends, you know, if you send me a link on Twitter and you say please promote this. I will absolutely blast it out anytime. And I've said to you, we have a project to promote anything that you need to get over the line or you need to get eyeballs out. Just tell me and I will do it. Okay. I mean, she-
Starting point is 01:05:15 So, Manza actually ungrateful. Well, she told me that- Your gratitude. She said, how come you never promote my YouTube? And I'm saying, if you tell me I've got this YouTube video, I will promote it 100%. Okay, well. And they're two very talented people.
Starting point is 01:05:30 I wish Riley would listen to reason when I try to inform him on how to promote himself on YouTube, but he would rather. You like giving advice. He, he had, I won't tell you what happened, but. But you do, right? You do like giving advice. Okay, let's just put it this way.
Starting point is 01:05:47 I have what, 245,000 subscribers on YouTube. Okay, and there's another individual who I won't name, who has I think a million subscribers on YouTube. And there was a DM thread or whatever, where Riley's going, yeah, you know, I'm really trying to promote the YouTube and trying to figure out how to get it out there. And me and this guy who has a million followers said,
Starting point is 01:06:09 well, here's some cool ideas that might help you out. And Riley got really mad and said he was going to come to my house and do stuff. And I was like, I don't understand. I'm literally trying to help you right now. And there's been a lot of animosity ever since I gave him advice. Basically, I gave him advice. He tells me the animosity started before that.
Starting point is 01:06:27 I gave him advice. No, I don't think there was. Right then? Okay. I tried to say, here's like some ideas I think for your YouTube channel. And he said, these are all really stupid ideas. You're going to ruin my channel and I hate you. And that was when I went, I don't know how to,
Starting point is 01:06:45 okay, I guess I can't help you, I don't know. Tell me how to help you, Riley. What do you want me to do? Do you want me to, if you want me to promote the YouTube channel more, just say, hey Vito, we got a cool new video up, like I tried to blast you out on this show. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:59 How do we not, have we ever not gone, hey, check out Mint Salad at fansly.com slash tins mint salad. You know how many times we've said that on this show? I don't know, I don't know. I try to promote my friends, I really do. Yeah, I agree. Is that bad? No, but I'm telling you, if that's true,
Starting point is 01:07:16 maybe it's something else. Right. Yeah. It's that I made fun of the view counts on the channel. Oh, yeah. And I've apologized. We call that big-leaguing. You ever heard that term? Sure.
Starting point is 01:07:29 I guess people, but I'm not big league. I, like, I'm just a guy. You just said you and another guy with a million subscribers implying that you guys are in a league of your own. If you want to make a sandwich, you can ask the guy at the deli what the best kind of meat is. Like, what do you want? I didn't, like, get the subscribers by accident. I think I have some common-sense tips that can help people out
Starting point is 01:07:50 I'm just saying it's called big league Call I didn't say do this or you're an idiot. I just said well, here's what I would do I think it would be cool. Okay. I Don't know. I'm trying to repair. You know the bridge I said they should call the reviews the autistic review of this movie Yeah, cuz right now it says mint salad saw this movie and I go that's great for your fans But as a guy on YouTube scrolling through would go mint salad saw terminator. Mm-hmm That phrase means nothing to me, right? Okay. Do you understand what I'm saying when I say that that like from a branding perspective?
Starting point is 01:08:29 You know I don't know what a mint salad is I understand your point But if it said the autistic review of terminator 2 you would go an autistic girl is about to review This I want to click on that he asked you this how many times did you make your point more than once I? Click on that. Let me ask you this. How many times did you make your point more than once? I Don't I probably yeah, I probably twice said it. I think I think I've I was told that mince out is very committed to that title And that's fine. Uh-huh, but don't say I've figured out YouTube and videos terrible at getting views But I've specifically told you a way to get probably thousands of more views the video I'm not autistic
Starting point is 01:09:07 If I was autistic I would have the autistic version of the autistic review of Deadpool Okay, people would click if you saw an autistic girl going ooh and Deadpool's next to her and I said the autistic review of Deadpool Yeah, I think there's an infinitely better chance that somebody would click on that then mint salad Saw Deadpool you're gonna go what is a mint salad? Why I just know you I feel like you probably made the point more than it needed to be made I think it was that I made the point and Riley said you're an idiot and Riley said you're an idiot. And then I was like, okay. Then I said I will not give you advice on YouTube.
Starting point is 01:09:47 Nevermind, I'm sorry. I think I said I'm sorry for trying to help you. And that's what- Where was that? This was like a year ago or something. And ever since then it's been like, oh my God, I can't believe Vito tried to help my YouTube channel by giving me advice.
Starting point is 01:09:58 What an awful evil person who doesn't know how to get viewers and doesn't know how to entertain. This is, okay, you know what it is? It is the grateful thing. It's the ungrateful thing. From who? From Riley. Oh, he's ungrateful. No, he's ungrateful. I'm ungrateful to Riley.
Starting point is 01:10:13 Oh. Because he booked me on the Dick Show, what, four years ago? Yeah. So he's- It's a good book. He's basically, he's kind of communicated this idea to me where he goes, you would have nothing without me. And I said, okay, well, you know, a lot of people get connected
Starting point is 01:10:32 with different people in business. You can't, like, what do you want me to give you? Do you want me to be eternally grateful that you booked me on Dick's podcast four years ago? I'm the reason you got booked. I'm the reason you have everything. Right. I guess in like a Rube Goldberg type way. Yeah, sure. It's not very complicated. Rube Goldberg. Yeah. But what, okay,
Starting point is 01:10:51 what can I do? What can I do for Riley at that point? Does that mean like, I just got to, for till the end of time, I got to love Riley with all my heart. Like, Oh, thank you so much for booking me on Dick's podcast four years ago. I don't know. Do all your old podcast guests gonna bail the matter joe all the time I sent him money and they told me it's not good because I do money's no good here They said cuz I did it anonymously. It doesn't count. So Count for what that I don't it's not a that me helping Riley is not real because I did it I didn't put my name on the go fund me Why did you why did you not do that? I just it on I didn't put my name on the GoFundMe. Why did you not
Starting point is 01:11:25 do that? I just figured that I don't know I figured people would make things out of it you know I figured all these guys who are like detractors or whatever would go oh look who's helping Riley out you know trying to after he hurt Eric July or whatever else. Huh that's interesting. I didn't know the whole situation, but I wanted him to get out of jail. And I was like, I don't know if I want my name. I think it's nice that you gave him money. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:50 I was like, I don't know if I want my name on this. I don't know what it would count for, though. Yeah. What do you mean? It's nice. Well, I'm being told it's not nice. I'm being told that it's like. I'm going to need a quote for that.
Starting point is 01:12:01 It was basically like, you're not allowed to get, you don't get any points For that I think was what they said points at what points in like they're related like this being you like being a part of a friendship Like you're not actually contributing. Oh friendship points. Yeah, and I'm like, okay I mean, I don't know I still gave you guys some money and I hope Riley doesn't go to jail but Also, they're really mad cuz they're not getting a super killer refund. But what are you gonna do? I Oh also, they're really mad because they're not getting a super killer refund, but what are you gonna do? I Give my I'm old but when I started getting into the refund threats, I think you know what I messed up somewhere here
Starting point is 01:12:36 No, this is I don't need this. It's pretty I should have been I should have done something different Well, it's all been very complicated. Yeah. At the end of the day, we love mint salad. Yeah. We like Riley. I hope everybody succeeds. My problem is snitches. Yes.
Starting point is 01:12:55 Have you heard of snitches before? This has come up in a couple ways here. Let me find Tim Pool. Tim Pool was found getting paid by Russia, Russian spies. Apparently getting $100,000 a video. I've seen a lot, yeah, $100,000 a video for videos a month, so that's $400,000 a month. Yeah, Lauren, Shin. That was being funded
Starting point is 01:13:19 by Russian interests. Oh, and they asked you to do it, right? Russia Today asked you tweeting about this to be a spy for them and they gave you access to something you said on Twitter I forget how you phrase it exactly I don't want to put words in your mouth. Well the way this works and I saw another guy tweeting about this is Russia Today which let's be clear the money I was offered was nothing near this and if it was I would be working for Russia right the money I was offered was nothing near this.
Starting point is 01:13:45 And if it was, I would be working for Russia right now. It was some sort of- Don't protect the spies. Honestly, it was like, I would have to go back through the messages, but it was like an hourly rate. I think the problem, it was like a typical salary, but I was like, yeah,
Starting point is 01:13:58 but I'm gonna have to work on that full time, and I'd rather just make my own shit. And it was for what? It was for finding influencers or something for them? It was. You're going to be there gasoline Maxwell? Well, they were like, the other reason I didn't take it is I was like, well, I want to make videos.
Starting point is 01:14:11 And they're like, yeah, yeah, we'll get you to make videos. But also, we want you to manage our Facebook and our Twitter and post news articles and all this other shit. I'm like, oh, that's. Oh, bitch work. Yeah, they wanted a lot of social media work because I was doing, they were seeing my tweets were going viral on there. They're on there like oh you're good at
Starting point is 01:14:26 tweeting like you should tweet for us you know with the promise of oh and then down the line we'll give you a show here's all these people have a show this was before Russ and Tay got shut down they had like a web presence on YouTube yeah they were huge I was on their show I was on their show and they didn't offer me shit you would have been way better at it honestly. You could have talked shit about it. I legitimately hate America. You hate the government. Yeah. But I think that's part of the problem. I think they're paying these guys like Dave Rubin and the baby that he stole. Yeah. I mean he gave the mom money but you can't really you can't buy a human. Still leavery. Right? Yeah. Still kidnapping. Right.
Starting point is 01:14:59 Or slavery. Those guys, Tim Pool, all the guys that they're paying are a huge embarrassment to conservatives. Like, Tim Poole and his Civil War shit, all they do is they exist to draw attention and turn it into money instead of activism. You know what I mean? So I think, and maybe it's a crazy conspiracy theory, but I think they're putting them on the payroll to just be themselves. Yeah, I think that is what's happening.
Starting point is 01:15:26 Which are totally retarded people. They're, I mean, the reason you would give money to Tim Pool is like, how much do you not love a retarded stooge who every day tells his audience, civil war is coming. Yeah. It's gonna be a civil war in America. Don't vote.
Starting point is 01:15:41 Don't vote. We want, you know. There's gonna be chaos in the streets. You don't think the Russian government sees a guy with like millions of followers telling everybody there's gonna be a civil war? Who's a total retard. There's a total retard and genuinely believes that like a civil war is coming and complete destabilization of the American economy and whatever. Yeah. And they go, can we give that guy money to keep saying that shit? You know, we don't want anything bad to happen to this, this chosen retard. That's actually, yeah, that's the, like, how is you, Tim, like, because Trump's terrible for Russia.
Starting point is 01:16:10 It would actually be better if Tim Pool was saying it because Russia told him to. It's actually worse that he's saying it and he's so retarded that he doesn't know. That he doesn't know that he's helping Russia and they're just giving him money. And all these guys are pretending like getting half a million dollars a month
Starting point is 01:16:28 doesn't just influence you on its own. Right. Like you're telling me he just, his bank went up by half a million dollars and like the natural reciprocation urge just didn't do anything in him. Cause anybody on earth gets half a million dollars in bank account, they're like,
Starting point is 01:16:44 well I gotta start, yeah yeah I'm gonna start kissing someone's ass yeah who did you Lauren you did this you're I mean you're a handler for these agents right spies literal spies like you know it can you like a hand gone in prison probably and then she's getting deported hopefully to yeah the Sun I've seen people in they're confused and they're like, what, you can't take money from Russia or whatever? It's like not only Israel. Not if they don't register as a foreign agent. Like you have to, the Department of Justice has to know where the money's coming from. If it's Russia, yeah. If it's Russia, yes.
Starting point is 01:17:17 If it's Jews, then it's, that's a nation. It's not even, it's not money for them. It's just, you know. Come on. I know. But you're saying snitches. What was the snitch type situation? Well, then Tim says this, Jim. I have been contacted by the FBI as a potential victim of a crime. Oh, were you victimized by the $400,000 a month?
Starting point is 01:17:41 Tim says, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would have fixed him. Tim says, I can't be bought. It's like, yeah, but you're bragging that you're too stupid to know where half a million dollars came from. Yeah, you didn't look into it at all. Your defense is that you're too dumb to know the-
Starting point is 01:17:55 What did you think Tenant Media was? Just a guy? Did you ever meet the guy? Why would any of these people deserve any money? No, yeah. They're not any good. They're not any good. They're not generating value. No.
Starting point is 01:18:07 No. That guy stole a baby. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Just don't get one. I got two. They each got one. They each got one. You know, I'm not good I'm not digging it at all All I know like surrogacy you made a comment on EBS's show. I'm gonna wait. Does he like surrogacy? I'm gonna do it at some point you are We'll see you fucking asshole if we get to a certain point and I just don't know there's definitely not we in that one if we the veto No, there's definitely not we in that one if we the veto
Starting point is 01:18:49 Experience me as a being of the cosmos if we you need to write an album Just call it we and I see you and like a one button sure Jumping in the air and can you yeah, I'll jump. Yeah, let's get a snap a shot of me We and I'll have an exclamation point a cool 90s font so Tim Poole said after crying that he's not influenceable because he's too dumb he said how tragic is that honestly you know his audience doesn't even care they can't figure it out because they're all fucking stupid too I've been contacted by the FBI as a potential victim of a crime the FBI believes I have information relevant
Starting point is 01:19:25 to an ongoing criminal investigation and have requested a voluntary interview. I will be offering my assistance in this matter. This retard, He's the victim. Has lived through all the J6 arrests, Trump getting sued for raping a woman that he didn't know that might not even exist,
Starting point is 01:19:44 and the FBI shows up and says hey I heard you got a half million bucks a month from Russia but you were the victim right and he goes yeah you there you go how would you like to interview how would you like us to ask turn and stay it's with us I would love to cooperate with you guys I want to be a part of it it's no honor among thieves my friend I hope they send honor among these I hope Tim cast the band is playing in fucking San Quentin. Yeah, maybe they'll get let him a Folsom was it Folsom state all the reason yeah Tim gets off there dress like Johnny Cage. He just starts going
Starting point is 01:20:21 And they're like, oh I thought you were gonna. We're gonna beat the shit out of you, you dumb piece of shit. Here's another snitch. Yeah, who's gonna survive in prison longer, Aaron Emholt or Tim Poole? Who will survive? Where is it? There we go.
Starting point is 01:20:37 Did you hear his experience talking about being in prison? Did you hear that at all? It was like, he immediately got bitched out. I know a guy who went to jail recently. I know a guy who went to jail recently. And the first thing he said when he came out was somebody asked him for his orange juice and he told him to go fuck themselves.
Starting point is 01:20:59 And it was like a cup check. Like it was the guy- Just trying to see if he's a bitch or not. Yeah, and now he came out and he was all proud of that of that like yeah, I mean, you know, that's cool In jail for that he had night. Just give him the fucking orange juice at that point. What the fuck you care? Nah, fuck you. I'm not no one's taking my fucking I do like OJ. I get it and then Aaron I heard the thing I heard in his story was Somebody asked him for his fruit cup and he like immediately
Starting point is 01:21:25 handed it over. Did he say that? Yeah, that was a real like a special part of his story. Did he say that about himself? Aaron bragged about it. He's like, yeah, cause what do I need the fruit cup for? And like, you're just that, you're not even realizing that you're a bitch and making fun of yourself.
Starting point is 01:21:41 You're talking about it like you, like you're sharing, like you're in kindergarten. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then the... Yeah, because I was like, what do I need a fruit cup for, you know? The Latin King is one of them. He pulled down his pants and he said, suck my dick, white boy. And I'm like... I wanted a different kind of taste in my mouth.
Starting point is 01:21:56 I wasn't doing anything with my mouth at the time anyway, so what else am I going to do? I'm going to sound like I'm reporting a podcast. Aww. God, why does he look like the biggest dweeb in the world? I mean that's coming from a guy like me. He can't talk about Nick's wife anymore. I think if you just say Nick's wife he can't even, he probably can't even play the clip. If you super chat Nick's wife he actually can't read the super chats, can you believe it? Isn't that crazy? The snitch mindset. If you're snitching on something that's then no one got harmed, like there's no murder or
Starting point is 01:22:27 theft or something, theft from a human, from a person not from like a bank or a corporation, you go to the lowest level of hell. I think you're at the bottom of the rape pile. For those of you who have missed out on what's going on with Aaron Imhold, it's that he had a restraining order or something? A restraining order from his first ex-wife, which he violated. So he had over his head, what do they call it? A suspended sentence. And a suspended sentence is, if you fuck up, we're going to put you in jail.
Starting point is 01:22:58 Yeah, for 90 days. And while he was on a suspended sentence, He went on his podcast and he said, Hey, hey Gino Bisconti, how about I send you these naked photos of a certain lady? And did you hear what he said to Gino on the show? Your boy didn't do bad, did he? Yeah, your boy didn't do bad, did he? What kind of fucking loser are you that you send a pictures of a lady you you had sex with you go? I didn't do too bad Aren't you too bad, huh?
Starting point is 01:23:30 Yeah, did you see the news article of dude? It's been in the Sun like this is becoming. I don't know how Aaron It's always so weird when shit that we think is like locked to our little internet corner. Also. There's like little local news reports Yeah, local All of a sudden there's like little local news reports. Yeah local popular internet podcaster Aaron Imholt has been caught in a revenge porn scandal again This is revenge porn if a lady sends you naked pictures of her You're not allowed to send them to Gino Bisconti as part of a bit for your podcast That's against the law. Well the bit was harassing the harassing a woman. Yeah, here's the look at this look at this Mother scared man about to lay down the law
Starting point is 01:24:11 Fox 9 it's like a portal to boomer land this guy oh great And this is gonna facing charges or something he allegedly did while live streaming my god It's like reality wrecking I know Fucking news it's completely changed This is all fun and parents found out Everybody put your shit down good luck Is the host of the steel-toe morning show can you my that has been on the air for? Decade oxides Karen skull and joins the decade explain what is happening. Let's hear it from Karen Seven-year-old Aaron and hope made his first court appearance this morning for disseminating private sexual images without consent
Starting point is 01:24:55 But he appeared to do this well actually live streaming. Well. Here's the clip I know okay, this late it like it's so fucking stupid because it is yes It's so stupid because the steel toe morning show is a guy in his house with a bunch of crap on the wall Yeah, it's not like a real fucking show. It's not real Look at that set 37 year old Aaron Imholz the hack comedian shirt the steeltoe morning show a youtube podcast with about 13 000 subscribers but one of Imholz may shows has him in some legal trouble he was reported for sending a photo of a naked woman Gino turned him in right what i think Gino him in. Jeano snitched a little bit of himself.
Starting point is 01:25:46 Oh, he did? I think Jeano went- Is that why he's like panicked? He seems kind of panicky about it. I think Jeano fell out with Aaron because he's like, what are you doing? And you reported Nick and his kids? What the fuck's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? Yeah, so I think Jeano went to the cops and was like, hey, this guy's sending me fucking revenge porn. I could be wrong, but that's how I understood it
Starting point is 01:26:06 Okay, a person joining him on the podcast That woman snitch around my situation to police and now em Holt faces criminal charges Did you check it? I like tattoos more than I think You boy didn't do too bad did he look? Look at that sheepish creepo! That is the creepiest! Look at how pleased he is with himself in like this creepy serial killer way! Your boy didn't do too bad, did he? Your boy didn't do too bad.
Starting point is 01:26:36 I had sex with a woman! Gino, look at the picture I sent you. Look what I did. It's fucking horrific. Jesus Christ this guy. He already looks creepy. Don't talk like that What's gonna happen to the steel-toe morning show He's got to keep doing the show, but he can't talk about the only thing anyone wants him to talk about He talks about cop stuff now. Yeah, it's like a show for cops if you could imagine He talks about cop stuff now. It's like a show for cops. If you could imagine a radio show for...
Starting point is 01:27:03 Wait, what? He talks about cop stuff? Like if you can imagine like an audience full of policemen, what they would want as entertainment, that's his show. Okay. You know? Just imagine like a cop sensibility. He does a lot of like sports talk and shit,
Starting point is 01:27:16 but he's lost every... Kind of, but he's like a noodle man. So he can't talk about it from like any kind of, not like Josh Denny and yeah Those look like Carl was a football player. Yeah What was I gonna say? Speaking of which we should put on our good friends Carl and Josh Denny with the big uglies podcast Which is a great podcast. Oh, you're shouting people out now cuz mint. I love everybody Subscribe to mint salad at ASC presents on YouTube and fans Lee dot com
Starting point is 01:27:45 all right well tits mintsale not a lot of data you saw me look up try to look up stats for snitching and I couldn't find very much it's it's an interesting well there's so many different types of snitches they make drugs more expensive yeah by snitching can you find that Tim Pool blurred out photo though I did want to oh yeah let me see the best One of the best things of this has been the news reporting on it and going like a certain podcasters have gotten themselves in trouble It's just like Tim pool blurred out, but it's just like white guy to be an eagle. Yeah, I wonder Where is it? Where is it? Oh, it's just Riley explaining why mint yeah right is explaining why We all love Riley he's gonna climb up the hill and kill oh you said you were gonna ban him from
Starting point is 01:28:38 The live show I didn't say that I did not say that Mint said mint said what are you gonna do the next time when Riley shows up to the live show and Riley's coming and heckles you yeah? And I said well as long as he doesn't do it during the actual show nothing If he's in the audience going you're a fucking piece of shit, but I'd go well I can't do the show if Riley's yelling the whole way through Would you hear how would you be able to hear one person yelling? You're a pig over an entire room for I am sure Riley will find a way Depends our last live show is very intimate. It was a small venue.
Starting point is 01:29:09 This is the guy they blurred out. Look at that, who could that be? I have no idea. Russian agent. I'm glad, you know what? He's gonna need a bigger beanie if he gets deported to Russia, right? Well Riley's not allowed to walk up the hill and threaten Eric Jalai anymore, so I guess I'm the stand-in. So at least I'm giving him something to do.
Starting point is 01:29:30 That's good, right? Yeah. He can't make Eric Jalai content until he gets this whole court thing followed out. So he needs a new thing to do, and I support him. He needs a new Eric Jalai, and you're acting like Eric Jalai in every way. I volunteer as tribute for Riley's ire.
Starting point is 01:29:46 I know he's probably sitting at home bored. He's like, I can't can't put stickers on a warehouse anymore. So he wants to come to my house, put stickers on it. You know, I want him to have something to do. OK, yeah. Snitching. Snitching. They in elementary school all the way up until you're fucking dead. It's just a tyranny of snitches. That's true Back I can't make friends you got we got to have apps that encrypt and hide everything cuz everyone is a fucking snitch
Starting point is 01:30:13 Did you ever get snitched on as a kid or more kid like snitch you out to the teacher or something? I don't know. I don't remember. I was in Bible camp and they had communal showers For the boys there was no adults in there what why how in the fuck would they have a communal boy and adult shower first of all they didn't why would you specify it's just saying it was a bunch of boys and all this shower in the same fucking shower whatever like that's how it was set up was there a little hole in the wall actually there was to see it all actually there was what do you mean there was a pipe that went felt a little
Starting point is 01:30:53 that squirted there there was there was no there was a pipe went through a hole in the wall and there was room around the pipe? So you could see but you could see into the girls locker room. So I remember all the boys. Like Porkies? Yeah all the boys the showers were connected and the boys would go hey come over here and you're like what and it was like a pipe but like the pipe wasn't flush with the wall so you could like see around it into the girls shower room. But I also assume that when the boys were showering, probably, I don't remember. I don't think they were showering at that time.
Starting point is 01:31:31 I do not, I did. How old were you? It's probably 10. I do not remember seeing anything through the pipe. And then I think they, I think a kid pointed it out to them and they're like, oh my God, we had no idea. And then they like fixed it. And I'm like, how did you have no, and looking back, I go, oh my god, we had no idea. And then they like fixed it.
Starting point is 01:31:45 And I'm like, how did you have no, and looking back, I go, no, you must have had an idea. There's no way you built this and didn't know that there was just a hole between the two showers. Let me get this straight. Yeah. The boys were showering and the girls weren't showering at that time. I don't think so.
Starting point is 01:31:59 So an adult could go into the girls. Yes. That is what I now assume was happening. I assume that when it was the boys shower time, probably there was a guy who would go into the girls' shower room and look through the pipe hole at the boys' shower. Wait, wait, say that again? Probably when the counselor, a pedophile. When the boys were showering, I assume a camp counselor at some point had figured out, hey,
Starting point is 01:32:19 I can watch. So some pedophile was beating off looking at you. That is my assumption. I don't know if he was doing it at the exact time I was in there. When did you figure that out? Oh, of course he was. He's like, had his eye on you. Everything I remember from Bible camp,
Starting point is 01:32:31 like the older boys' cabin going, we need to wrestle today. And taking all their, because the camp counselors told them wrestling is cool, taking all their mattresses down and stripping down to their underwear so they could have a wrestling match in the older boys cabin and I remember all of us in the younger boys cabin going man I can't wait till next year cuz then we'll get to then we'll be able to wrestle oh boy okay what was the point I was making oh the point is I was trying to make what's the name of this camp camp molestas
Starting point is 01:33:01 fun no mr. girl was not at this camp. And there was a camp was fun. The parts I remember. Sometimes I wake up screaming and I don't know why. Anyway, the part I remember is we were all in the shower room and I for some reason thought it would be funny to moon one of the other boys, you know, pull down and go, hey, look at my butt.
Starting point is 01:33:23 You're coming on to that. Yeah. Sure. That kid went running and screaming to another counselor. And he went, he mooned me in the shower. And I went, this guy's fucking insane. Oh, yeah. I was trying to take a shower.
Starting point is 01:33:33 I took off my pants, and he started screaming like a little bitch. And because it, but here's the thing, because it was Bible camp, he started pointing at me. He goes, Jesus knows what you did. Jesus knows what's in your heart. He knows that you fucking tried to moon me, and I'm like you're fucking nuts I love Jesus way more than you and Jesus knows I didn't do shit and
Starting point is 01:33:52 I always remember that kid snitching on me for mooning him in the shower Bible camp and you're doing this for a fucking entertainment of a pedophile yeah exactly and there's a guy Watching through a hole at the whole thing he's going all right This is a good show. Oh look at that moon. Yeah, I knew I had a good eye for you There you go, okay, don't send your kids to Bible camp. It's very fucking weird Yeah, and not just because of the fucking preaching to you about how dinosaurs are only 200 years old I don't know I don't know what that was about. Why are they so obsessed with that fucking shit?
Starting point is 01:34:27 I'd rather have your kid... uh... molested by a trans person than a priest, right? It's also the reason I learned the wrong lyrics to, uh... Louis Louis. How did they teach it there? Pharaoh, Pharaoh! Oh baby, let my people go! Louie Louie. How did they teach it there? Pharaoh Pharaoh. Oh baby, let my people go.
Starting point is 01:34:50 Oh no, you did this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all the lyrics are about Moses. They did that with a lot of popular pop standards actually. And then later on in life, I heard Louie Louie and I said, why are they covering Pharaoh of Pharaoh? I said, these lyrics are all wrong. You're supposed to be talking about the- What a bunch of fucking assholes.
Starting point is 01:35:18 Dude, Bible Camp is weird. I wish I remembered more of it because I remember it just being the most surreal fucking experience Yeah, and my family was the weird thing is it was just this one period of time where my dad all of a sudden had Some sort of crisis and he went we're religious now And I'm like what is going on boomer dads did not have a lot of direction Yeah, like they didn't they weren't watching the right things on TV They were seeing TV, but they were seeing like bonanza and shit They weren't seeing like Mad Men
Starting point is 01:35:45 and like sitcoms where dads are fucking up all the time to learn how they could fuck up. So they just- To learn that no one else is living this weird Christian lifestyle that you've suddenly imagined for yourself. Yeah. Yeah. To have somebody say, I don't do that.
Starting point is 01:35:57 Well everyone else's family is taking their kids to church and sending them to Bible camp, whatever else, it's like not really. Yeah, okay, well. Yeah, there was just a weird two year period where my dad decided we were religious. And then eventually he went, no, we're bad at this. No, he was, no.
Starting point is 01:36:11 Honestly. Was he your age now? Probably, yeah. Probably, maybe even a little younger. They didn't have podcasts back then. No, he didn't have anything to do. Now he could just check into Joe Rogan. I think it was, I think honestly though,
Starting point is 01:36:21 I think it was the thing where it's like, I want a community, I want friends. I'll make friends with all these Jesus people. So podcasts are for now. There you go. You don't need God. That's what you do. Okay That's my snitches. Great problem, dick Well, here's a problem. I've got as I've said I've been streaming over on whatnot. I'll stop making plugs, but one thing is I have my whole table set up with all my Magic Card stuff that I sell. And I have, because of the table, the way it's set up, and the camera, or whatever,
Starting point is 01:36:49 I need a chair that's low to the ground. So I can grab stuff and have it right in front of the camera. And I said, I know what I'll do. Simple. Get a bean bag chair, nice and low. Nice and low, and then I'll be right there. You didn't know that was a bad idea. And it has been the worst experience of my life
Starting point is 01:37:06 and everything about it is terrible. Yeah, there's like two beanbags on top of each other. So my problem, Dick, is beanbag chairs. Why would you think you can work in a beanbag? You are so fucking lazy. How could you? It's not lazy, I just saw you do a load chair. A beanbag is so lazy.
Starting point is 01:37:22 You can't even move in a beanbag. It's work to move in a bean bag Well, how the fuck were you gonna do presenting whatnot in a bean bag? I just I love the word bean bag It's like FTX level. I mean it's one of those ones where I'm like I'm sure you can uh, you know, I could contour in the way I need I could put it exactly where I need to be And it does that's not it doesn't work at all It's not cuz cuz I would I've how long does it take you to get out of the bean bag it takes a while I'm gonna need a I need one of those things from the shower. You know any yeah exactly
Starting point is 01:37:56 Here's the thing about you need something low to the ground Just for some reason the way the camera is set up because you can't your tripod is too low Yeah, my my try I guess I could get a higher try I could get a higher tripod But then too low? I guess I could- I could get a higher tripod. I could get a higher tripod but then it's gonna be above the table. I could get a different table that's higher. I don't know, man. I just haven't figured out- What are you talking about? Why is this so confusing? I haven't figured out the ideal situation.
Starting point is 01:38:16 And it almost worked. By the way, a bean bag would never have been- It almost worked. You engineered it so you could sit in a fucking bean bag. No, I really didn't. Don't bullshit me. I tried using a regular chair, and I sat in it and I said, oh shit, I'm like way above the camp. Like how? Where's the table? Like this? Okay, here's the problem is I have one of those phone tripods that only goes up like yay high.
Starting point is 01:38:37 Okay, where's the table? The table's like a normal table? It's one of those like folding tables. Like a camping table? That's about this big. I have one upstairs get from Home Depot. They're like about this big I have one upstairs. It's a little lower than this one. Okay an inch two inch I can't I can't I could not do this. I could not get my knees under it So it's lower than that. What the fuck? Yeah, I could not get under this table. It's at knee height About so it's at the seat of the chair height if it was actually at this height did you not extend the legs?
Starting point is 01:39:05 I should check if I know I I'll check the legs extent if you if the if the legs extend I'll let you know Regardless yeah, it's at a good height right now. Okay. I'll see if the legs extend I don't think the legs okay, so you have a table that goes legs come out from underneath Yeah, but sometimes they have extenders on those. I'll see if they have extenders. Yeah Anyway, so you decided a good height. I should get a table. How the fuck would a beanbag help cuz you're the same height No, but it's because the beanbag can get lower to the ground. It's not really yeah beanbags lower than a regular chair Well, but not your feet like not your knees. I
Starting point is 01:39:46 Don't I don't know how to explain it. Okay, all I can say is the beanbag was... How do you get one of those beach chairs with little tiny stumps? Honestly, it might be at the right height, but it's probably less comfortable than a beanbag. Beanbag. How much comfort do you need? If I'm going to do a two hour hour stream I would like to be comfortable. Why would I not want to be comfortable? But how comfortable? You're talking about like a bed. It's not a bed. I just look again if I if I could have this chair in a table of this height I'd be
Starting point is 01:40:15 fine. You can easily have. I know. I could get another table. I'll get a different table if I decide that's the way to go. Maybe I'll just get a different table. Or find the extend. Or find if I can extend the legs or maybe there's the way to go. Maybe I'll just get a different table. Or find the extend the legs. Or find if I can extend the legs, or maybe there's another way to raise it up higher. My belief was I should just get a lower chair. It's not that big a deal. I had the table already set up. I already had the table and I said,
Starting point is 01:40:40 well why don't I just get a chair? Well, cause the table was at my knees, Jerry! Kramer, why do you have a beanbag? You're streaming, not sleeping! If you have the table already, you get a chair to fit the table. You don't get a new chair, you don't get a table to fit a chair you don't have. But you don't have a table, you have like a kneeble. I do have a kneeble.
Starting point is 01:41:00 So right now you're like stooped over? Yeah. It's very uncomfortable. It sounds very uncomfortable. It is very uncomfortable. You can't stop at like Home Depot on the way home and get a normal sized table? I'll measure the table. I'll figure out what kind of table I need. This has not been an elaborate process. I just said why don't- How have you been doing whatnot this long with a fucked up table?
Starting point is 01:41:19 I haven't been doing it that long. I don't do it that much. Okay. I've been doing it- That tracks. Yeah, I've been doing it like once a week at the most Problem with beanbag chairs dick is the filling can flatten over time. They're fucked. Yeah retarded They're bad for you. I forbid you spill on yourself when you're in the right when you get in the chair Oh, so into the fucking beanbag. That's horrible. It's like a workout to get out of them and He's fall asleep in them. You're fucked. Your neck is fucked. your back is fucked, everything's fucked. Actually it's true, yeah if you sleep
Starting point is 01:41:48 in a beanbag chair it will destroy your spine is what I basically read here. They're like please do not sleep in a fucking beanbag chair. You can't fucking them. Remember when love sacks were big? Yeah those are not bullshit. Cuddling in a love sack was nice. I enjoyed the cuddling but the fucking was not enjoyable because you can't like get him away. Yeah women love Oh, yeah, I'm just falling on top of you get the fuck away from me for a second And you always like you'll be in a beanbag chair and you're like this is our And then you look and there's a bunch of little white shit next to you Fuck is that a little white shit and you look around there's a bunch of little white shit
Starting point is 01:42:23 Yeah, come oh man. No little beads white shit and you look around there's a bunch of little white shit. Yeah, oh man No little beads or whatever and y'all they're looking at rip in the fucking thing. Yeah, you know great I'm not gonna fix a beanbag chair where half the beans fell out of it I'll talk about beanbags making me want to get a beanbag Well, I I was trying to see this thing and I started looking up my are there any good beanbag chairs The answer is no love sacks were good Love sacks are good. Yeah, okay, but like that's too big for what I'm trying to do that takes up like a whole fucking room. Yeah Here's another thing about beanbag chairs is do you remember the? 1995 beanbag scare My tabs, it's how I keep track of it. Were you there for the 1995 Bean-
Starting point is 01:43:05 You ripped hair into your notes. I did not rip hair into my notes. It's just I tear up my paper a little bit. Like Bart Simpson hair. Yeah, okay. Were you aware of the 1995 Bean Bag Massacre? No, it's not. That's not what they actually call it.
Starting point is 01:43:18 But back when they first started making bean bag chairs, they're like, well, this is great, you know, because it's full of stuff. If you want to add more stuff stuff to it you just open it up and put more stuff in it And they said so we'll just put a zipper on it that way you want to unzip or it You can put more beans there you can take some beans out if there's too many beans in it You know yeah, you really got a fucking fine-tuned. You got a really fine-tuned your beans Yeah, and then a kid said hey, this is cool. It's a magic cave. I can explore. Oh, they all suffocated they just unzipped the beanbag
Starting point is 01:43:49 climbed inside and Suffocated you would come home and you're like something's wrong with my beanbag I'm sitting on the even unzip it like this area in the fuck. He was retarded Fucking moron make his tombstone a beanbag Died in a beanbag like an idiot you ought to sit on it. You're like this fucking beanbag chair I make his guys this thing full of bones and meat this sucks Your kids is dead inside a beanbag dead inside a bean bag. How horrible is that?
Starting point is 01:44:24 How did they fix that? What do you mean? Well, now if you get a bean bag chair, they don't open. Or if they open, they open to a separate zippered compartment. So it's not like you can't just get into the beans anymore. This standard regulation started in November of 1996. Young children should not be able to open the zipper and gain access. Any bean bag chair capable of being refilled must possess a zipper with a lock that can only be opened with a special tool.
Starting point is 01:44:50 So if you have a beanbag chair with a zipper... Ah, fucking all this regulation shit. It's gotta have a lock on it. And I just want those beans. And there also has to be a permanent warning label on beanbag chairs. That's helpful. Kid comes along and goes, oh fuck, I was gonna climb inside this death trap. But I read this label. So that's my problem dick is the uncomfortable beanbag chair and murderer of children, which is beanbags
Starting point is 01:45:14 beanbags What's the other one? malls the death of the shopping mall experience of shopping mall experience snitches, yes and shopping mall experience of shopping mall experience snitches Yes, and Was the other one that I did was the first one that I did and Riley is don't read
Starting point is 01:45:40 Wait from you you said snitches and hell nah hell nah Hell nah Riley's live commentating his Wait from you you said snitches. Yeah, what I held on hell no that was hell no hell no Riley's live commentating his uh I'm glad he has I'm glad he has a focus now. You know because he can't talk about a ring July anymore Maybe we gotta pick up that ball Taganize I'm helping him. I'm giving him a focus in his life wait somebody sent I want this young man to succeed somebody sent me this for you okay slacker shirts yeah let me see they said put it in Vito's booty but I don't want to do that right oh here you go it's got a picture yeah okay it's got a picture of me looking cool, hanging out on my farm. It says oink oink oink on it.
Starting point is 01:46:25 And it says oink oink oink oink oink-a-mania. There we go. That's a new. Oh my god! Look what you made me do. Look what you made me do with your present. What was in that? What was in?
Starting point is 01:46:37 It's just water. OK. I spilled my water. Water's fine. It doesn't matter. I know. But I don't want to ruin the table or whatever. Thank you for my oink-a-mania t-shirt. Let's see it. Oink-a-mania is cool. It looks cool like Hulk Hogan. It does.
Starting point is 01:46:53 Well, he should have made a yellow one. Yellow and red. Oh, he fucked it up. Or red and yellow. Is it oink-a-mania or oink-a-mania? I assume it's oink-a-mania. Oink-a-mania. You gotta admit, that's funny. Very good. Sounds funny. Very good Oinkamania is going wild. That's a classic. At least people are getting a little creative. That's all I ask Oinkamania run wild on you. Oinkamania is running wild. This is I don't know what this is. Is this the whole, is this the prop comedy section of the show It's a fucking get present that someone sent you
Starting point is 01:47:28 Okay Just pull it out. What are you doing? Hey remember that knife that you got sent last week. Why don't you fucking use that? Okay, this is no. I'm not gonna wear a hoodie in California. Sorry to tell you that There is no universe in which sorry if these smell they're from Afghanistan Wait, what does this say? Both of these have the same note just in case Wow. This guy must be a military guy Sorry if these smell they're from Afghanistan you can unroll the hats if they don't fit your fat fucking heads Vito the black one should help slim you down since you are unwilling to do it yourself. Got it. Boring. B. What do we got? I'm just making sure I didn't-
Starting point is 01:48:25 It's a blanket or a hoodie? This one's for you. I can't, there's no way I can wear this in California. Jesus Christ. It's a cool like, I don't know what it is. Is this for doing a, okay. All right. Oh my God, why is it black?
Starting point is 01:48:39 Is this a hood? What the fuck is this? I don't know. Is this for your neck? I don't know. This is Afghanistan. This is a hat. This is a hat. Okay.
Starting point is 01:48:51 You said the black one's for you, right? I think I got it backwards. I got the same thing, so... It's a hat? I think it's a hat! What else could it be? I don't know. Let's see. Actually, it looks... a hat! What else could it be? I don't know, let's see.
Starting point is 01:49:07 Actually, it looks- maybe I was supposed to keep it rolled up. I think I wasn't supposed to unroll that part. It's too tight if you keep it rolled up. Oh, is it? Yeah. Here, let me play a voicemail, won't we? Can you play- should you play that a la music? Is this- is this some sort of...
Starting point is 01:49:20 And then we also have- well, this is like a nice Afghani shawl or something. Oh no, you're supposed to unroll it Look, it's got a tie. Okay, but is it a hat? Are we doing it? Right? That's not for anything else. It's a nice blanket though. This is nice Wait, what is this? I don't know. You said it was the tie Remember this is a blanket. Yeah, you taking the burlap one or the black one? I think he said, I thought he said the black one. Oh the black one's for me cause I'm fat.
Starting point is 01:49:49 Yeah. Got it. He said cause you won't lose weight. So it'll help you. So I'll wrap myself in a black blanket. You gotta sweat it out. Okay. Trust me I'm already sweating it out.
Starting point is 01:49:58 This fucking California's a nightmare. Uh. Get your, get your thing away from me. This looks good on me. Look at that. You're wearing it wrong. You look good actually. What do you mean I'm wearing it wrong? Yours is all flopped over and shit. You gotta like Tim pool it
Starting point is 01:50:14 Like this no pull it maybe you look like a mushroom man I look like when Bill Murray goes to the future and ground and Scrooged I look like Claire right I think it's hard with the and uh, Scrooged. I look like Claire. Right? I think it's hard with the uh, head. Get him away from, don't let him touch you. Touch you Claire, or something like that. Remember that? Like that hat she has?
Starting point is 01:50:29 I do remember. There we go. Huh? How about some spaghettios? Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Jesus. How's Nick doing? You talk to Nick anytime recently? Nah, but I'm sure he's doing good. He's streaming, right? He's happy. I don't know. I'm taking this off.
Starting point is 01:50:49 It's too hot. Okay. Thanks. Do we know who sent that in or is it private? Jesse's. Thank you, Jesse, for your delicious present. Oh, the last one. This.
Starting point is 01:51:00 I'm not, come on with this. What? Come on with what? I don't. Do you know what happened here? Yeah what I don't know what happened here Yeah, I actually do what it happened here. Well. I know what that tape is and I know what's going I know what that is as a thing. What do you mean? Is it whatever what I hate Funko pops, you know this yeah, but what do you why are you?
Starting point is 01:51:22 Being weird about well because it's it's not just a Funko pop. Yeah. It's a pop yourself Funko pop. Yeah. But I'm going to assume the person who sent it did not pop themselves. No, but then they also said after last week they said hey, first they said I sent you Funko but that's not for Vito's booty. That was the first email I got. So that was this. They sent that was not for Vito's booty. right, that was the first email I got so that was this they sent that was not for vetoes It's just as a present right and then after last week. He said hey You can just throw that in the trash now. God. I felt different at the time Whatever you want to do
Starting point is 01:51:58 For some of the final laughs on the show Some of these final laughs because of your behavior right because of how you were treating fans I just because I hate the fans so much well. I don't respect them Do you want to see it do you want to apologize to that guy first? Where do you want to see it first I? Have the feeling I'm not gonna want to apologize to this guy. That's my assumption assumption I have the assumption I'm not gonna want to apologize to this guy. Make sure I get ready for it yeah and then because of your the way you were treating people. I feel like you've opened this already and you've looked at it. No I haven't why what do you mean? It looks like it's been tampered with. How? Just like some of the tabs are a little. You're
Starting point is 01:52:39 fucking gaslighting the audience right now with your bullshit Okay, this is what he made and sent Am I gonna like it maybe I like it maybe it's cool. I mean he had his feelings hurt it is By you he'll be alright. No he said throw it away. Okay, that's it. Oh That's actually pretty nice. Yeah, but he said throw it away because you hurt his feelings. Well, I mean, it's his, it's his call. What are you holding? Oh, you have two mugs of beer. Two beers.
Starting point is 01:53:11 And I'm holding a Cuties DVD. Oh, no, that's a Funko Pop. I'm holding a different Funko Pop. Yeah. Of Freddie, oh wait, but it's a, okay. And I'm holding a cheeseburger. Yeah. In my other hand, as I am.
Starting point is 01:53:24 I don't know if he wants credit cuz you Cuz he said throw it away cuz you were acting like such a You know what? Diva oh look he couldn't put dick they wouldn't let him know do you know that's like a thing That's I know I lost my twitch account because of it dude They said take mashin is offensive now, so you can't have it. What the fuck? And I said, what, she just deleted it? You couldn't change the name? Bro, it's so crazy. Because I'm using, okay I'll say this, I'm using that Whatnot app and people go,
Starting point is 01:53:51 Hey how's Dick going? And it says message block for inappropriate words. And I go, was the Dick Van Dyke show not like one of the most popular shows on television for a decade? Not allowed. I can't even have it on Rumble. Rumble won't even let me do it. So that guy made, he took all that time to make those. And then you were shitting on fans so much. I didn't shit on any fans. What fan did I shit on? I have not shit on any fans.
Starting point is 01:54:15 You said like, you don't want poor people to be able to have a voice. I think you said. Yeah, that was definitely the worst. And you said they're not funny in their sense of, in your sense of humor is better than theirs. Well, they're definitely not funny. I will definitely say that about a certain group of fans who are ones
Starting point is 01:54:29 I know you you think you're better than you know Maybe maybe coming from affluence does allow you to be a funnier person Domino's money that Domino's money is real What do you think about that cool nice thing that that guy made it's very cool And I appreciate the fan who sent this in. So you want to apologize to him? I apologize. I mean if he wants an apology. I mean like Ethan Van Skyver you're like blowing him like oh you don't even know how much I love you. Okay okay okay. This guy makes this and you're like fuck you. I don't need you. Vito has not grateful. That is the ultimate complaint of everyone. Yeah. He's the most ungrateful and I'm not being a victim what do people want me to do what do you have to be grateful to me to do okay you have to be as grateful as me I'm like
Starting point is 01:55:16 whatever you guys want to do I'll do it yeah I know that except for the silly pants skating routine for some reason I broke my leg because of Ralph. Hahaha! Which you promised people for 20,000 Patreons and you didn't do it. Yeah, but then my Patreon dipped! So it's- That's not- That's the policy!
Starting point is 01:55:31 It dipped because you didn't do it! You didn't do it! I had a bunch of injuries right in a row! Everyone should ride dick! I got sued! If we're talking about fucking promises- I will do it if it goes above 20,000. Guaranteed.
Starting point is 01:55:42 It was above 20,000 and then you didn't do it. But I was dealing with so much stuff. That's not an excuse. Oh, Superkiller's not coming out because I'm dealing with so much stuff. See how gay it sounds when I say it? No. Okay, well you should make up to the fans and do the things you promised to them. Okay, I'm sorry everyone. I took you for granted. There you go, and I agree. I also took you all for granted and thank you.
Starting point is 01:56:03 There, we both did either man's got me like oh if I could ever do anything for you cuz you're So beautiful Italian way I was promised a favor the Italians are well known for our favors Okay on the day of my daughter's wedding. It's not a favor though. Cause like what could you do for him? He's like a successful, you know, accomplished man. What could a baker do for the godfather?
Starting point is 01:56:33 Save his life. You don't bake? I could bake. Oh my god. I've made a... I baked a great loaf of bread one time. A huge pain in the ass. Ethan, what could I ever do for you? Do you need me to talk about cuties online? Anything you need.
Starting point is 01:56:55 Enzo the Baker... I could define epiphelia for you online if you ever need that. Enzo the Baker saved the Godfather by standing in front of the hospital and pretending he had a gun in his coat. And who made the cake in Godfather 3? Enzo. Because loyalty is rewarded. All right, here's this guy.
Starting point is 01:57:16 Hey, this is Jeremy Burbank. Vito called me his very good friend. And I would have considered him that. I know I sent those excellent Microtech knives, but I would have considered him my very good friend if he hadn't gone on a blocking spree, including blocking me. By accident I have defended him.
Starting point is 01:57:44 By accident? On many of his accusations from the idiots who you go against him over the last few years again I wish I could unsend those knives realize what is funny. And he doesn't realize that myself, Jeremy Burbank, this is how I talk. Wait, is that the guy that runs the knife thing? This is not Jeremy Burbank. This is not him. It's a prank call.
Starting point is 01:58:17 Guys, he's got his name wrong also. When you're like, it's Jeremy Burbank, I go, that's not his name. PVK.com, get yourself a Microtech knife. They're very cool. Hey guys long-time listener first-time caller Vito's talking all about how it's all the allowed minority I Do hate loud minorities? Oh hell no! Veto refunding SuperChats? Oh hell no! Veto not grateful about fucking cussing fuckabuzz? Oh hell no! I don't know if we can talk about loud minorities with keeping our channel.
Starting point is 01:58:55 As long as you're not in the drive-through line. We love them. Okay, here's another guy. What the fuck? Why? How come I still can't send fucking SuperChats? Fuck you, Veto. I send- I give you guys money every fucking week. I'm on member your fucking patreon I'm a member your fucking YouTube channel and now I'm banned from fucking Communicating with the other people. Yeah, I can't send you guys fucking super chat. Fuck you fucking fat piece of shit Thanks for all your support and Thanks for your comment. Are you gonna stop banning paying customers? Yeah, I already said look everybody who got banned
Starting point is 01:59:28 I thought I unbanned everybody. No I had to. Who did not get unbanned that you had to unban? A lot of people Okay, what do you think I'm fucking lying about that? Just send me a just say hey I'm banned You know how many people unban? Do you know how many people said you do it? Why would I tell you to do it if you already said you would do it and didn't Do it I thought I did Now you didn't whatever I get messages all the time dick block me on Twitter and I don't know Twitter Yeah, you're not fucking paying for Twitter paying I feel like dick doesn't respect my contribution not on Twitter
Starting point is 02:00:01 I don't I know you don't because I have to get the messages all the time begging you to unblock these people And then I start blocking them and all of a sudden. It's like oh, I can't believe you I'm like I'm blocking super no I get the Twitter fucking thing any to Twitter I don't give a shit about all right anyway if you're blocked on Twitter I don't know why and then that gravedigger jester guy was crying to you that he's he's blocked or whatever Yeah, cuz he's doing good stuff, okay I don't know who the fuck here's here. That's the other problem. Yeah, I can't keep track of you people I can't if your name is goobledee gook fuck it well not that goobledee jubilee
Starting point is 02:00:38 Jester okay could he be I didn't connect those fucking dots. I don't know he doesn't have the picture of himself the mask And then I go hey, I'm having a great day and someone goes in you fucking team guy pig piece of shit I go okay. Well. I don't really want to interact with that person I don't know who's who on this fucking team guy on there veto the team guy That's very good, and he has a hamburger in the hand. I did notice that pretty cool. It is actually pretty cool They've gotten pretty good at making those and I got to throw that away got the color of my glasses, right? So you might well made his love turn into no no we're gonna throw that away Because of your behavior anyway when you go all these guys look I know the guy who went to the grave and that's great That's how I know you as I don't know you as this guy on Twitter
Starting point is 02:01:20 So if I block you you can go hey, I'm actually that guy who did that thing and I go okay. No one cares about Twitter. But I think the problem is people think I know who they are when I block them and I go I don't think you guys understand how many stupid fucking messages I get every day I don't know who's who. Mr. Big Shot. Whatever anyway if you want to be unblocked at the BPITU and you can say veto unblock me and you You're gonna block in two seconds Yeah, say team guy T unblock me team guy fuck team guy fucking and then show up in my whatnot chat pig pig Oh, I'm trying to sell magic cards to people Trying to extend the fucking show into every aspect of my life Oh, no, that's it. You can't undo that. Look if you sign up for whatnot.com slash invite slash veto comedy I'll give you one. Don't you think it's like
Starting point is 02:02:09 You can't say dick though or apparently you get... All these like all the things all the all the bits that you've like forbidden all share the same like they're boring like the team guy thing the pig thing. What can you do? Do you remember those SpongeBob episodes where SpongeBob he's fun job is like Squidward Squidward Squidward Squidward Squidward Squidward Squidward Squidward and he finally goes what yeah? You're a squidward I am like you don't think that's funny because it's funny. It wasn't funny to Squidward clearly fuck Squidward fuck This is fuck Squidward, okay? What do you want? You're asking Squidward to not, you're like, I can't believe Squidward's acting like Squidward.
Starting point is 02:02:53 Have you people not watched SpongeBob? Yeah. You all act like fucking gibbering SpongeBob retards, and then fucking Squidward reacts and you go, I don't understand why he doesn't respect the fans. I don't understand why Squidward doesn't respect the fans. What? Squidward should respect the fans more.
Starting point is 02:03:13 Yeah, he should. You're right. He wouldn't get... That episode when Squidward went to Squidward World, and he went crazy and became annoying, he was a lot happier. Right, because there's two of them. Then he realized that
Starting point is 02:03:25 Squidward he needed Alright Hi, I'm that guy shot himself in the finger with a pin nailer guess what you got a vote up fucking finger pain again Yeah, my thumb with a hammer last night You gotta vote up fucking finger pain again. Yeah, my thumb with a hammer last night God it fucking hurts like a motherfucker Fucking go fuck yourself and you know when super killer coming out Hmm that's coming along
Starting point is 02:04:00 I'm pretty happy with it. Actually. I think Okay, here's it. I've been having a lot of fun Hey, dick the video just waltz is how I talk. Yes. I don't appreciate it the way you and the fans have been treating me Lately, so I just want to say Barnyard noise fuck yourself very cool boring boring Was putting an effort See how everybody's finally trying. Yeah, I didn't really work on the phone though. You gotta go like oink oink oink not like REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE E E N E T E R T H I T H I T T H I T H T H I T H V O U L L L Y M E A L L L O W M O R E. Yeah. Hey, hey, Vito. I know the voicemail will not get played every time I leave a pro Vito voice. Oh, okay Never plays it Do you see the craziness already I get I get I know there's a lot of voicemails, sir
Starting point is 02:04:46 I know Voicemails like I'm looking at a list of voicemails This is a fraction of what's on there people ask me for the voicemail number and I go you have to find it because otherwise We're gonna get another 50 someone said why would anyone call in if they're not even gonna play them like I mean I don't even Do you think Howard Stern lets every caller on the air if no one asked you to call in so what it why are you? Upset by I'm sorry if it's really good Not even if it's really good. It's just like I see em and I'm like, okay word word word word Fuck you for that. However, I got it. I'm on team veto on this one about
Starting point is 02:05:25 the direction of the show the show is way better when it's the two of you guys bring in problems that are well-reserved Thank you kind of doing goofs and gaffs on the problem. I only call veto fat So many times in so many ways And it is just kind of a bit repetitive and annoying so I am pro Veto. There you go. And both you guys. He's a Veto file plus.
Starting point is 02:05:52 He should be a Veto file plus because that's where all the fun is. The Veto files have been having a great week. Veto stocks are rising. The guy who came on that picture of you is in that is in your Veto file chat. Yeah. Which one is he? I'm not going tell you okay? Yeah, I love that guy. He came on a picture of me That's the one that's a high honor Disgusted you which is funny, so it's double. It's a double win for me learning to me very boring kind of something You're coming on pictures of stuff that everybody's putting in effort
Starting point is 02:06:22 Done with the low effort super chat. Oh, yeah As I was listening to you talking to EVS I realized why you want people to put in effort to make fun of you, right? It's so you can shit on their effort. I Don't think that's correct. That's it. Do you want them to put something of themselves out so you can shit on them? I'm sure that's a that's a theory. I don't uh, I don't subscribe to it necessarily. It was like a eureka moment. I said, aha. I agree. Okay, go to biggestproblem.show. Yes. To vote. Uh, patreon.com slash biggest problem. And now, so we don't do super chats anymore, right? No, we definitely do. So we don't do super chats anymore
Starting point is 02:07:12 Let's see how many super chats do we have what time is it what do you mean? Where are you going? Actually, I'm better bus. I am I am going somewhere. Where are you going? I mean some guys for a late dinner Well, you better fucking hurry Well, then we'll have to burn through my go for it No Yeah, go for it. No, no, it's all right. I got time. You can read them faster. I know. You missed one.
Starting point is 02:07:33 Oh, wait, no, you're right. Sorry. OK. Frog Tony for two, thank you for not vetoing yourself. Synthetic Shinobi for two, thank you for not killing yourself. Lemon Trashy for two pounds, thank you for not killing yourself, haha. The Malware for two, it's with a heavy heart that I send this super chat
Starting point is 02:07:47 he but two for two says bus bus bus bus pig pig pig cyphers and suck this for two says thank you for not killing yourself ours in for two says coo for two thank you for not killing yourself dick paninski here's here's a thought should we tie here's a thought can we just tie, here's a thought. Can we just like- You didn't make it that far into the- Well, here's what I think. The Super Chats do go very long sometimes. Right now, this talking is taking longer
Starting point is 02:08:18 than the Super Chat. I'm sure. I'm saying if it's a $2 Super Chat, can we just like, should we just breeze through it and like only respond to like the $5 ones? Listen, you can always go faster. Okay. Yeah, but like sometimes we like drag on one and then when it like ends up being like 20 minutes, sometimes I know Reddit like is really crying about, oh, the Super Chats are too long.
Starting point is 02:08:46 But it's like, hey, retard, that's how we make money for the show. Yeah, I know. I don't know. If someone's giving me a solution and the problem is me making money, then I think I found where the problem is. I just, I do look at a lot of comments, so I get bogged down on that and I don't know
Starting point is 02:09:08 what people want. Maybe we do a poll or something. Doesn't fucking matter what they want. It's money. This is money in your pocket. I know it's money in my pocket and I'm reading it. You can take this money out of my dead hands. What if I read it and then like if it's a five dollar one we go like, oh well that's
Starting point is 02:09:21 a little more of a thing and we should, you know. You don't have to do any of that shit. We should look for five dollar ones that are like, you know, have discussion topics should you know we have to do any of that shit. We should look for $5 ones that are like you know you know you have to do any of that topics. You can just read it. Or is it for two? We did that one. Dick Paninski for $5.56. Happy girth day Edo. Oink odds for $5. Over under odds for Vito's weight tonight. Over $3.04, negative $200. Under $3.04, plus $100. Argarash for 10 pounds. Can everyone stop with the pig jokes? It's boring.
Starting point is 02:09:48 No one gives a ham. People getting banned need to just stop swining. When I see these same super chats every week, I think you all have hamnesia. All right, you got me on hamnesia. Pretty good. TBF for five, stench tempers upon us. After hearing Vito leaves dump smears and TP to marinate the air. No wonder he's so smelly
Starting point is 02:10:07 Nighthawk for five Vito will super killer be getting released to coincide with like tober we will see Beach hook for five I found Vito's old blog where he documents cheeks He slept with it says here the last entry was eight years old and that was last year Right dog five. Thank you for not oinking yourself. That's not a real blog user. User for five, no it's not. Turkey Sammich for five, everyone thinks Vito's gonna quit, but considering his support for communism I think he's gonna stage an oink-chevek revolution. Yeah. See everybody's putting in the effort. T.T. Vito for five, Canadian. Sucks with that phrase. Why did Vito the pig become a comedian? He was known for his hammy jokes. Okay that is actually terrible. Diamond G for 2.22, reckoned 1911 as a patriot, justice for all.y jokes. Okay, that is actually terrible. Diamond G for 2.22, reckon 1911 is a patriot, justice for all.
Starting point is 02:10:47 Thank you. Diamond G for six, request the team guy song. Nah, it's 25.25. Hasman again for two, the last woman Vito slept with was a man, that's incorrect. Black Crimson for five,
Starting point is 02:10:57 Australian, thanks for the snacks, thanks for not killing yourselves. Black Crimson for five, Australian, airing of the grievances to Electric Borgaloo. And no. This is the cleverness you wanted. You asked for this. I mean, they're trying. They're trying their hearts out. It's a little better.
Starting point is 02:11:13 Antoids for $50. Says a Vast Ye Land Lubberer, prepare yourself for the greatest bacon bit. See, that's good. From here to Key Lardo. That's not as good. Captain Masterson and his band of baconeers are here to smash your booty before ye ham-hack it to the highest bidder. Not terrible. Thank you for the $50, Antoids. We're in the New Yorker now. Chris Primer for $25. My zippers bust, my buckles break. I'm too much man for you to take. You have to tell me what song That was supposed to be done in the key of Jeff City for five Australian video You should shame the audience by revealing the order numbers for 2xL to 7xL biggest problem shirts
Starting point is 02:11:52 Actually, the audience needs to be shamed for being too little there's too many mediums. There are a lot of little guys, huh? Lots of little Both got start eating start eating also excel Sturgis to the show Yeah, I fucked up I printed a bunch of the largest and extra largest because I was like yeah our fans are huge Dirtbags and it turns out it's all like a little little boys Yeah, pineapple man for five just a kind to comment about veto in a sea of rudeness and hate a checkpoint if you will Bag of Schmidt told me I'm an empath and he is so right. Well, thank you for your support If you will bag of Schmidt told me I'm an empath and he is so right. Well, thank you for your support
Starting point is 02:12:31 Hot fat dingle door for five Canadian. Hey, if you know your guest appearance in house season three episode six was awesome What is that where the guys like super fat or something? He's got the guy with the wiggly eyes and he's like he's yeah, he's like 600 pounds But he also insists the whole time that he doesn't care about his weight and everyone tries to get him to lose weight And he'd like throws a fit the whole must be hard to find a 600 pound actor, huh? It's fat suit Wow That's that's uh as you would call it a suit. I was gonna say, you know if we can't have You can't you can't have a straight guy play a trans guy or a gay guy that's against the rules Yeah, can't have a skinny guy play a fat guy like Brendan Fraser yeah exactly I mean well he got fat for that so well not fat enough put in the after he just got fat
Starting point is 02:13:13 normally yeah has manned for five veto lied about losing weight to the PKA boys how did I lie I said I cheated it's funny veto talked about what speaking of which can I get that Vito loses money? Whoever's in charge of that. You have to email Boris on. I sent him a message one time. Well you gotta do it again. I know but can he ma- alright whatever. Boris. Oh yeah, don't wanna do the work yourself. Can't send two emails for 1200 buck a reel. I forget. I can't rem- I always forget. Vito talked about working on two issues once when he could barely get the first out You guys will see has meant for two Billy billboard headed Masterson slap and add on my head
Starting point is 02:13:56 Achilles for five. Thank you. Jack Rockstar for 50 Says I can't watch live because I'm helping host a benefit concert But if you want to make Vito mad for obvious reasons and give money to a good cause, he's at a benefit concert. Do you have any? Oh yeah. Do you know what that is? He sent me this message.
Starting point is 02:14:13 What do you mean a benefit concert? Isn't a benefit concert like you buy a ticket and you watch music? I don't know. I think it's a trick. It's Help Palestine. No, okay. So he's not actually at that, I assume. Help Palestine. Help Palestine. Heal Palestine. No, okay. So he's not actually at that, I assume. Help Palestine.
Starting point is 02:14:28 Heal Palestine. Nebraskans for Peace Palestine Rights Task Force. About Heal Palestine. Okay. So if anyone wants to help Jack Rockstar's Heal Palestine app, how much do they get? I mean, they're getting a lot of money. Like individual donations are a lot of money Yeah, every individual donations are like a hundred bucks ten bucks twenty bucks like super chats basically people love Palestine
Starting point is 02:14:53 What are they playing? Maybe they like the music? And all their comments on the on the donations are boring like Palestine flag free Palestine, repetitive. Anything about the Jews in there? Well... Hahaha! Any kind words for that? I don't really know how to... HS Dante for two says unban Steve you pig. Whoever Steve is.
Starting point is 02:15:17 TTV2 for five Canadian, what's the difference between Maddox and Vito? One weighs less than Lizzo. Achilles for five, I met a real life master chief ISOM last week. There are some people named ISOM out there. Matt Parzinski for a big $10 says, why do you guys refuse to acknowledge Doug and Anthony? Also don't read my name on the show.
Starting point is 02:15:38 Okay, well it's a little late for that. I have no fucking idea who Doug and Anthony are. Doug and Anthony are great, or they're pedophiles. Yeah, I love Doug and Anthony. Or Doug and Anthony are pedophiles. I who Doug and Anthony are. Doug and Anthony are great. Or they're pedophiles. Or Doug and Anthony are pedophiles. Pick whichever sound clip you need. I love Doug and Anthony, slightly less than I love Mint Salad, who made a trading card for the Superkiller.
Starting point is 02:15:52 See, you're just using, you're using her to boost your comic. That's the part of the problem. I'm promoting her artwork. Nah, you're promoting your comic. Well, it's a little, you know. That's how it comes off. Well, I also promoted her channel. I should go to as he presents go to fucking.
Starting point is 02:16:09 What is it? Fans Lee dot com. Yeah, Titsman salad. I don't think it's about the promotion though. I think it is. I think it's that I'm not grateful enough and I don't do enough. I think you think it's transactional, but it's actually just rudeness. No, I don't think it is transactional.
Starting point is 02:16:24 It shouldn't be transactional, but it's actually means rudeness. No, I don't think it is transactional. It shouldn't be transactional. Transactional means promoting, though. Right. And I'm saying I'm trying to do that because I genuinely want people to succeed. I don't want anyone to not be making money. I want everybody to be making money and everybody to be safe and happy.
Starting point is 02:16:38 Nah, you got to, it's the relationship part first. I think, OK, so like, you know. So saying it's about transactional stuff is demeaning to the Relationship part, but I think there are a lot of people who go I put more work into this friendship than than you I think Not transactional common Emotional work is what well a lot of people are not coming to me for emotional support And I get it might be and you might be this might be why you're having these problems with people. If anybody needs emotional support, okay, I'm here and I'm available.
Starting point is 02:17:10 I don't know how much I can offer. I don't know what I can say or do, but I'll try. Probably not making fun of view counts anymore. I'm not making fun of the view counts. Okay. ASE presents Check out Mint Salad reviewing. She's reviewing Twilight Zone right now. You don't need to plug her! That's very cool. Yeah, but yeah. I think it's cool that you're- I thought it was cool Remember when she reviewed Mallrats and Kevin Smith was like, hey this is who I made this movie for. Arrr.
Starting point is 02:17:40 And I was like, man, aw man, I wish I had helped- He's trying to fuck her. I told Kevin, I was tweeting at him, like, Kevin Smith, go on the show, let her interview you, you know, that would've been cool. I remember that, that was nice of you. Cause that would've been really cool. Cause you are good at networking. I have a way of... But you're not good at taking compliments. I don't get a lot of compliments, so...
Starting point is 02:18:00 I guess I never learn how to take them. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 02:18:08 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 02:18:12 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 02:18:16 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 02:18:20 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 02:18:24 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! before the show no veto you can't have any you can't have any that's what he should have well he didn't Warren for five we only make jokes as we care Vito we don't want you having a super coronary before super killer comes out Lane Steele for to Australian we don't take kindly to folks ruin podcast well I'm ruin it's return jury for 500 dicks in my ass I am NOT for that V it's no one wants no one's dicks in my ass Megan I am NOT for that VEETS. No one wants Dicks in my ass. Megan Mann for two. Veto don't visit Greenland Thank you. Well, but the Cylon for two Why is the intro black and white? Because the end of the show forever. Odysseus for five dick the segment about the double a guy, AA guy asking how to manipulate another addict was one of the best segments of your other show. Oh, thank you
Starting point is 02:19:00 I agree. I missed that segment. That was really funny. Was that recently? Yeah, that was last week I'll have to tune in that was oh that was a humdinger Lord Pepsi for two does we don't I know don't feed the trolls Gu-way, I think you meant suey Flutter dashy for five veto play shin Megami tensei three knock torn, please. I'll play it on my whatnot stream I can now play video games while I sell magic Cards. Krizlers for two, RIP podcast. DiamondG for five, I'm not gonna release until Superkiller gonna be a hell of a tribute in just October. I come.
Starting point is 02:19:32 He's not gonna come until Superkiller comes out. Is DiamondG the guy who come on the stuff? No. We got a lot of comers now. Synthesis for two, if you don't play Shin Megami Tensei, VV Cosmo, is that the one that just came out on Switch? Utah B Utah Bazaar meeting for two how much do you regret wearing that pink hat I don't I'll wear it again synthetic shinobi for two comments. This is ha ha ha ha ha Cardinal Cardinal for five says we love veto Jared 7 7 1 4 5 says I lost my shit at the pig mask veto 1
Starting point is 02:20:01 Oh, there you go. I put it on before the show and I said dick is this funny And you started laughing very hard and I said yeah yes Megan man for two doctor disrespect the age of consent Boba the Cylon says veto is and some sort of Chinese characters which I assume spell pig the Jerry and coke for $20 says great opening dick and veto I love you both thank you Jerry and coke and that's a huge super shit thank you Flutter dashy for two Shin Megami tensei VV is garbage play knocked I like say I like the super chats everyone arguing over shin Megami tensei
Starting point is 02:20:31 So that tell ya do more of that LJ clobberino for 20 says chest I'm making video cry It's funny to see dick rage. I support the Federal Reserve I have notes for the show and Maddox is a genius No, you gotta find something that will make me upset. It's harder than you think. Arrr. Yeah. Matt M for five says, Vito, you should play and stream
Starting point is 02:20:49 on Machine for Pigs this month. Is that the... I saw people saying that, you gotta bully Dick Back. I was like, oh, that's bad advice. Oh, that's terrible advice. You don't understand. If I bully Dick Back, I'll just go,
Starting point is 02:21:00 oh, we're doing this. Like, I know you too well. You're gonna say some horrific shit, so... That works on bullies. I'm not a bully, I am a psychopath. No, you're absolutely insane. I don't think people... I get a lot of comments that are like, no, like you should really push back on Deck.
Starting point is 02:21:16 And I'm like, call him an alcoholic! Yeah, I'm like, look guys, I'm doing my best, but you can't push this guy. It's a little... Did you learn that from an Oscar school special? I knew a guy who pushed dick a little too far, and I saw how that turned out, and you know,
Starting point is 02:21:34 what are you gonna do? Yeah, he's a guy that did 40 episodes with a guy pretending to be his friend after he fucked the love of his life and was still doing it. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. That's kind of a, not really a bullying that guy back. That's a pretty good bit.
Starting point is 02:21:51 Cynicys for two, it says Shin Megami Tensei VV is funnier than Craptorne. Zeta Queen Cell for five, keep up the good work Edo and remember we love Edo. That's a Veto file. Yeah I know, I love the Veto files. Fuck! I didn't update the end of show graphic I will do it next week if someone reminds me. Megan Manifortus says veto play sort of the succubus Oh my god, there's so many video games. SB for five, veto's mind currently teeters on the edge Will he pour himself into super killer, embrace religion, or go trans for real? My money's on all three. Although it sounds like work
Starting point is 02:22:20 So wrong. Being a woman is a lot lot of that's what I don't understand about the trans thing as I'm like that seems like an exhausting amount of work and then I realized there's a lot of trans people go no it's not and you know you're doing it bad like you do have to put in a shit ton of work you see the trans shooters manifesto came out dude what the fuck he he wanted a big dick his parents to take care of his stuffed animals after he died you know I saw that been a major concern of mine for my whole life is a man what happens to your stuff what happens to me stuffed animals you're saying that's not the most masculine
Starting point is 02:23:02 sure you get all me stuffed animals their own and I don't want you to change my room mother. Don't change my room. Oh my god dude. I'm a man. If you change me high school room I'd be insulted. For some weird reason. So they said if I don't survive my massacre is how they said it.
Starting point is 02:23:23 Yeah. I don't survive killing a bunch of children please don't change my room in any way I don't want all my stuff in the basement total guy total guy thing a lot of guys think about that for every everybody it's very manly baby yeah that's what Ted Kaczynski most of his most of his manifesto was about is stuffed animals. And the industrial sector has cheapened stuffed animals so much that they don't even mean anything anymore like the Velveteen Rabbit once did. When I die, you know, plushy the snake, I don't want him being left aside.
Starting point is 02:24:01 Take care of my beanie babies, mom. And I loved stuffed animals. them being left aside. Take care of my beanie babies, mom. And I loved stuffed animals. I will say, I was a stuffed animal. I loved stuffed animals. I wish I had a big throbbing cock. I never had that, yeah. Why does my brain not work because I was born in the wrong body?
Starting point is 02:24:17 Doesn't sound like it. Sounds like you're born a woman. And your brain don't work. Exactly how God intended it. There was a lot of, the part where they started talking about about the penis they want who they want to fuck with the penis I was like right things I want to talk to this kid who's not talking to this kid and going Okay, here's that's not what being a guy is about yeah having a big penis and fucking Girls that you want to fuck that's like a really tiny amount of
Starting point is 02:24:44 Yeah, that's well again. That's like a really tiny amount of being a guy. Yeah, that's, well again, it's a lot of derogatory for you to say that, you fucking bitch. It is kind of bad. That's great, put together, put that IKEA furniture together. I think a lot of this is coming down to, I think if you're a parent,
Starting point is 02:24:58 you gotta, you can't give your kids privacy anymore. These kids are going insane. If your kid has access to the internet, you go, you can have access to the internet internet and I will look at every single thing you do and say on the internet until you leave this house. Cause the internet's just turning kids fucking nuts. And I get it. Hack the movie clips channel for five says Vito. I want to make a great show. Also Vito. I did no show prep. Can you carry the whole episode Tony? Yeah, Tony you fucked up that episode Why didn't you carry it the down range gamer for a 279 Canadian says shout out to Josh Hill Thanks for watching
Starting point is 02:25:34 Cross-purposes for 10k and dick doesn't text minors But there is the 16 year old boy who calls it a TDS to discuss doing his mom's friend Here's to the greatest last show ever. This is the last 17 Fucked his he fucked his mom's friend when he was 14. Oh, yeah old men trying to fuck teenage girls is infinitely worse than teenage boys fucking their mom's friend Just because they just want to get their nut off. Yeah, don't get any relationship with them They will groom you and fuck up your brain.
Starting point is 02:26:06 Right. But the girl will have her fucking life destroyed. It's a lot different. You weird feminists. It is not the fucking same. I think when I was in high school I uh... I forget what it was. No, I was probably...
Starting point is 02:26:20 I was probably like 19. When what? I had a sex with an older woman. Whoa. But I don't remember how old I was. I don't remember if I was still in high school. 70? She was in like her 40s or something.
Starting point is 02:26:34 How big were her tits? Very large. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Starting point is 02:26:39 Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! It was a very large black woman. OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Starting point is 02:26:48 Big, big, huge titties. Oh my god. Hit me with a couple of hell no's I'm sure. Oh wait a minute. She was black. She was black, yeah. Oh hell no. Oh hell no HELL NAW! I think I might have been like 17. I can't remember. Was she big?
Starting point is 02:27:07 Yeah, well she wasn't like, like, huge fat, but she was like, you know. Mid-sized. Was she like that lady posing in front of the white people are racist sign and giving that lecture? I don't remember if I saw that. Let me bring it up for you. The white people are racist- no, I know what you're doing. No, she wasn't that big. White people are racist. No, I know what you're doing. No, she wasn't that big. White people are racist seminar. I know who you're talking about. She wasn't that big. Let me just show the audience though. This lady.
Starting point is 02:27:36 Bit skinnier than that. Bit skinnier. Aw, thanks a lot Vice Magazine. Thanks a lot Kevin McGuinnessy. Fucked us over again. This girl. Activist Ashley Scha- God damn it! Keep ahead a little bit. Aw, thanks a lot, Vice Magazine. Thanks a lot, Kevin McGinnis. You fucked us over again. This girl. Activist Ashley Scha- God damn it! Just skip ahead a little bit. There. Right there.
Starting point is 02:27:50 I see her, I see her. She's bigger or smaller than that? She might have been that size. I don't know. I was just- I was just looking at those huge- Oh! I was just looking at those huge titties. The huge titties did it for me. I was like, you know what, I don't care. I'm into it. You're looking up like a mountain.
Starting point is 02:28:12 Well they are like a fucking mountain. I like black chicks. You know, when they're not crazy is the problem. And again, it didn't ruin it. I still go, man, I should find that lady again and see what's up. Now she's like. 70. Yeah, I was going to say. Now she's probably a little too old.
Starting point is 02:28:32 Yeah. Let's see here. Durange845, people will always overlook the production time if the product is good. I like the preview chapter. It's just weathered storm Vito. Yeah, it's looking good. Durange845, you're so funny, Vito.
Starting point is 02:28:44 ZetaQuinkSell for two says says Maddox lost Veto one. Durrangeape for two, says I love you, Veto. For another two, he says check your mail, Veto. For another two, he says wear the dress, Veto. And for another two, he says put the lotion on, Veto. Now I don't want to check my email and I'm scared. You fucked it up, Durrangeape. Government name for five.
Starting point is 02:29:03 Back super killer Eric Chalaz and F-Slur Goad, Green Bay Packers. I, uh... Who was the quarterback for the Packers? Was it the Packers? Red Favre. Who's that other guy? Uh... I don't know. Maybe I'm thinking of the Jets. Anyway, Big Stiffy for five, my son and I love you, Veto. I don't know about the son part. Thanks for not quitting.
Starting point is 02:29:27 Drain James for two, why don't you respect the fans, Vito? Kevin Flesher for two tries to get me with a beef fare. It's been rough making a comic. The Jerry and Coke for five says, I made you a burger, Vito, you won me over. Oh, thank you. What did I eat today? I had a delicious sandwich.
Starting point is 02:29:43 Government Name for two, two to get Patty the Batty on the show. Don't know who that is. Spider Eternal for two. Finish your do an entire episode as a loud Italian. It's the difference. Nefersetti for a big 10. Edo, pitot, disappointment. Fails with the ladies with great corpulence.
Starting point is 02:29:58 Desperate for fame, but it's always a miss. Shirley will pass from body, how beatis? And hashtag replace Just what you wanted they want to replace so funny who won the replace veto up hole Ralph of course What were the who are the contenders? I don't know Nick. Riketa was one right yeah, Riketa Ralph probably Tony from hack the movies. Oh, you should do a show with Tony you guys can talk about which gremlins has the most gremlins. You know why this show works. It's cause you're funny. Cause we have the same trolling sense
Starting point is 02:30:39 of humor but also you're a really mean person. That's what people don't get. They're all telling you why you're funny and how the show works Right, you're liberal and stuff, but it's not it's because you're a mean person. I'm that look Right, right all these 80s movie review channels. Don't they kind of blend together over a certain time It's always a bunch of nerds sitting around dressed in Ghostbusters outfits going, hey, you guys remember Goonies? Remember? Remember all those Goonies? Grandmas are Goonies. Here's some you might have missed from Friday the 13th, 7. Who gives a shit? Who's watching this shit?
Starting point is 02:31:19 I might hack it. How much were the gems in the Goonies' mouth worth? Where's slots at add? I might hack it. How much were the gems in the Goonies mouth's words? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Thank you. DrainJay for five. This bit put my card on fraud alert, and it wasn't that funny. I'm so sorry, Ted. Oh, because you super chatted so many times. Yeah, you fucked that up, DrainJay. Please take my money. I'm not worthy of your attention. Idiot.
Starting point is 02:31:50 PS, do not read this. Spider Eternal for two says, if Vito wasn't here, the moon wouldn't get a break. Renaxxus. Everyone's funny today. Renaxxus. Well, not that. Renaxxus for five, Canadian.
Starting point is 02:32:00 Everyone is talking about other people's wives. You can't stop thinking about food. What, the whale? I don't think of whale as a food. Unpleasant for five Australian. Yeah. I have wanted to try whale bacon. That's the one thing. That they cut into the jaw, or it's all the fat and the meat.
Starting point is 02:32:14 Apparently it's very good. Unpleasant for five Australian. Dick you have a pronounced forehead and long hair and a t-shirt and big muscles. Veto hello. Thank you. Tritergy for ten. Big ten on the board. Imagine complimenting someone's wife
Starting point is 02:32:26 by comparing her to deep sea bass fishing. It's classic Vito. But when you expect gratitude, they chuck dicks in my ass. No one wants to have pizza dicks, no one wants it. I like when they sneak the chuck dicks in there. J-Rob detailing an iron for five euros says, cheers boys.
Starting point is 02:32:40 Thank you, J-Rob detailing. I love you, buddy. Bova the Cylon for two. Their J is called Harvey Wangstein. Talking about the Jewish, Chinese Jews. Harvey, get Harvey Wangstein in here! Get him in his wig penis! Oh, oh!
Starting point is 02:32:55 Harvey Wangstein. Hello. Oh, hello. Harvey. I have a new movie called Aromio and Juriet. It's kind of Shakespearean rub. Shakespearean rub. Aaron for a 10.
Starting point is 02:33:09 I think Vito should ironically host an Oinktober calling episode with big personalities as co-hosts. Oh yeah. Who are these big personalities as a possible olive branch. We could do something in October. Oinktober. for five pounds says, did Vito like getting spit-rosed by his trans girlfriend? I did not take dick in my ass. Trio Doug for ten says, couldn't make it today, but I'm sending my energy, we will win and I love Vito. I love you Trio Doug. Trio Doug comes on by the whatnot streams just to hang out.
Starting point is 02:33:39 He's my number one guy. Yeah. I sold him a PlayStation. If anyone wants to buy a PlayStation. Oh. 50 bucks. Psychonautical89 for 10 says, I am the cum king. You are all my very loyal and very gay subjects. Paging Dr. Eric Wong, more Josh Denny.
Starting point is 02:33:56 And thank you for not krilling yourselves. Josh Denny is very popular on this show. I want to remind everybody, check out Josh Denny's comedy special, Goliath, now available on YouTube. Search for Josh Denny Goliath and watch that. Yeah, a great like explanation of why you were messing up. Did you see that? I don't pay attention to that. I saw Ralph made like a big gay video about how to like make a ring better. Yeah, but Josh Denny had like a really good explanation of what you were doing and why you were wrong. Alright, fair enough. I was gonna say, if you watch that special you can hear me and Dick laughing in the background and you can hear a girl asking is that actually
Starting point is 02:34:33 how trans surgery works as I tell her can you shut up and listen to the jokes you dumb blonde bitch. So Goliath from Josh Denny on YouTube. Sega Genesis Survives says I'm just glad my best friend Vito is having a good time. Well, thank you Sega Genesis. And for five, I can't wait for Vito to ban me, so I have a reason to pirate the show. Pirate the show. So like I plan to do a super oinker. Arr! Pirate to super oinker.
Starting point is 02:34:53 Don't pirate my comic. What if they do make a super oinker like edit? Go nuts, man. He goes into universes and oinks. And messes up everything. It would be highly, okay. That would Mr. Mick Stippleyick, except he has to convince his superhero to go oink
Starting point is 02:35:09 and then the whole universe messes up. What if the fans of this show took initiative to be creative and original and interesting? Yeah, that would really drive me up a wall. That would really blow me out, as opposed to what they do now, which is harass my artist on Instagram You fucking asked for that! You're gonna say you didn't but you were arguing with that guy on Twitter or on Facebook
Starting point is 02:35:31 You cannot argue with everybody! I got a great uh, I got a great email from Indiegogo where they forwarded me his complaints HAHAHAHAHAHA! They're like, hey this guy is really really mad and I'm like well what can you do? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHH A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A It's all you with love who I love tough love and mint salad set me straight as well a lot of a lot of tough love So I was acting wrong not showing respect I want her to I want her to be happy I hope she she made the trading card for the thing and the card looks good So you're gonna have to drop with this transactional shit. It's not transactional. You're talking about like do this
Starting point is 02:36:20 I'm trying to promote her. That's not what everybody wants. They want a real human response I can't give you one. You have to. I'm not a human. I'm just a pig. Nah When you have to apologize then you can't. I am apologizing. No you're not. What am I supposed to do? You're promoting You got to listen with your ears. I don't know. I don't know what's wrong. I'm a bad friend. That's it. Can I just be the bad friend? How about I'm just everyone's bad friend? Why don't you go to Home Depot and get some wood to make a big cross for you to nail yourself to?
Starting point is 02:36:53 That'd be good. I probably wouldn't. Did you see the little pig that Mint Salad made? Yes. When you pissed her off? I know, she's very... She's very displeased with me. Joe, I'm Joe for 20, thank you. And for another five, he says,
Starting point is 02:37:06 I'm not sure what happened to the message on my last super chat, I think Vito ate it. Good one. There you go. Sebastian Anon for 10 says, oink oink piggy piggy oink oink. Also nice seeing you on trashcast last night. Well, I love Ethan, we love EVS. Oh, we heard how much you love Ethan.
Starting point is 02:37:22 I wonder if Rainbow the Brute action figures may still be available. I'm not sure if that campaign's ended. I know Cyberfrog campaign is still running and all my friendships are transactional. So I gotta promote. You have to give real compliments. I think the Rainbow the Brute action figures look really cool. I want one. Did he like?
Starting point is 02:37:44 I hope I don't have to pay for one but I'll buy one Like them they look I think I think it's cool. He's making action figures It's really hard to make action figures Brits man for two. It's his dick's not ugly. He old he oh wait He's not ugly because he old he okay. You know what if you're gonna Know if you're gonna do a $2 super chat you need all these like little fucking Abbreviations to make it fit yeah, but I look better when I'm drunk so that's true Odysseus for five Donna the Dead couldn't happen without malls, and that's the best commentary on consumerism good boomer problem But I agree popcorn plant is here we love popcorn planet for $10 this
Starting point is 02:38:25 video is fat did I do that right is that how this show works you nailed it buddy Mike hunt for five Australian says a surprisingly funny cartoon was the clerks animated series the first episode was a flashback episode flashing back to earlier in the same episode. That's incorrect. The Clarks cartoon. I thought that couldn't go any worse. I like the Clarks cartoon. I'm sure. The first episode they aired was a flashback episode that kept flashing back to an unaired episode which was very confusing. Yeah. The Clarks cartoon is great. RJ Dio ruled for two. Thank you. Cameron for two. Vito, when was the last time you were wrong? I've never been wrong in my life. That's a good question.
Starting point is 02:39:06 The Archangel Joe. When's the last time I was wrong? Let me think. What was I wrong? It was a flashback to a gangbang. Well, I told everyone to buy HEM stock and then it got cut in half. And it's not coming back.
Starting point is 02:39:20 It's coming back. No, the market's gonna crash. There, man. Everything's going down. There has been a, it's a bad week. Mm-hmm gonna be a bad three years. Yeah pull out everything I've been sitting on my sitting on me bonds and me tea bills I've done I've done all right. Let's see I'll start pulling some stuff out the Archangel Joe for five oinktober is upon a super killer more like super killed your career JK loved the show Vito don't kill yourself
Starting point is 02:39:51 But they're robins for five. It was nice of you to promote mint cells Twilight Zone review. What was your favorite part? I don't watch them real black guy for two says dad what so I'm talking about. I don't have time to watch movie reviews I'm talking about though. I talking about. I don't have time to watch movie reviews. That's what I'm talking about though. Look sometimes I'll try to watch Hack the Movies and I go okay this is some interesting stuff about what's his name. You don't have to watch it but I'm telling you that's the part that you're missing. He asked what's your favorite part? I didn't watch it. I didn't watch it that's it but I'm still happy she's doing it. I think it's yeah you know again I think it's cool that she's doing it. But I'm still happy she's doing it. I think it's, you know, again, I think it's cool that she's doing it. Real black guy for two. Dr. Disrespect said he was trolling by being a pedo.
Starting point is 02:40:30 I heard that. Good troll. Good troll. We believe you. Russ against for two Australian says monster energy. Russ against for five says Tony Hawks pro skater. Maxwell 21 for a giant $17 says Vito, it's your boy Prime. Can I play with you in Street Fighter? I'm pretty mediocre with Kami, but I bet we'd have fun. Are you talking about Street Fighter 6? I have a copy of that and I have not opened it yet But maybe I should. Straturgery for five, imagine asking for a number so you can apologize But as soon as you speak you escalate dicks in my ass. No one wants that Vito's in dicks.
Starting point is 02:40:57 No, I don't know why people say they don't like the Chuck Dixon. Super Chad? I think it's kind of funny. Coding Titus for five. I know they're like fun stupid though They're like no because because you start reading it like it's normal reddit Well, you start reading it like it's a normal thing and then out of nowhere it goes and then it Chuck sticks in my ass I'm like, I'll see you weren't expecting the horse man is coming out. Yeah the horse man You see the ripitart that was like I Talking about the chess thing. He said I win with the night sometimes. Is that what he said? I win Yeah, I've won. I've he said I win with the night sometimes is that what he said I win Yeah, I've won. I've won tons of games with the night. I think what bro. What did you just say about chess? Oh
Starting point is 02:41:34 Yeah, I love the night. I've won a bunch of games with the night And then another other riptard was wanting chapters in the book because he keeps losing attention Oh, yeah, he wanted a chapters a graphic novel, which no one does. Fucking retard. Here was my question is, so there's a video where Eric Jalai did a stream and then a guy was confronting him about his books being $5? Yeah. Did you watch that?
Starting point is 02:41:57 I didn't watch it. I also didn't watch that. He's making fun of him. I saw like a clip of it. Yeah, and then apparently deleted the stream or tried to hide it because he was like fighting with the guy. Yeah. So here's the thing, I don't know if we talked, do we talk about this at all, that he's everything's five dollars or it was he had a flash sale. Yeah. And my theory which you
Starting point is 02:42:13 might share is that he is running out of money and has some sort of impending warehouse bill or has to make payroll and he's like the only way I can do that is by shoving out a line of new merchandise, shoving this dirt shit fucking horseman comic. He's making all sorts of announcements all at once where I'm like, That's desperate. It feels like weird desperation. He ran out of Russian money. Lauren Chen's, Chen Choo's cutting him ISOM checks.
Starting point is 02:42:40 Well now he needs, but now he needs, first of all, what do we think about Yellow Flash giving Eric half his is basically a bunch Of money for no reason There's no way he agreed to give him like that much money to I would hope not it's moronic. Yeah, you're just a fulfillment warehouse Well, if yellow flash makes three million dollars eric's got to make 5000 What do you get five percent?? Not even? Three percent? You'd make like four dollars a book for fulfillment?
Starting point is 02:43:08 Five or three or four? Four if you're ripping them off. Just for fulfillment, probably two bucks. Two bucks a buck. Yeah, so ten grand. It's nothing. Yeah. If Yellow Flash agreed to more than- I mean maybe he did because he's dumb. And he's dumb well, I wonder if it's this I
Starting point is 02:43:34 Don't know what's happening. I feel like Eric July is going to these guys he's going Look at how much my campaigns made I'll put you on every one of my students You can come on with me in that fat British retard Yeah, and we'll go oh the thing about the golden patriot man is the most exciting thing since horseman Who's that? Eric that's a new Eric. I guess it's not as good as not as hippity-jibbity Whatever I don't know what he's promising. I saw they were making fun of Star Wars action figures on sale Yeah during their $5 sale. Yeah, you saw that Ethan had it cut up if they're going Oh, look at this $5 shit. This is never gonna sell and then over on you're like, yeah
Starting point is 02:44:10 Oh, they just got to get rid of him cuz no one's buying him Well, that's what I said he was doing with the charity fraud like oh he needed he needed like eight grand for some reason You need you need cash you need it and you do weird thing Well, I think it was the thing where he's like, oh I can make a little extra money doing this stupid thing which notice He hasn't done it again. He hasn't done it again. Yeah, he's had tons of comics. He's got tons of debt inventory He hasn't given the comics for kids another shot actually it would have been odd Isn't it if his company was fucking? Company was doing well. He would not be posting all the comics for five dollars. He'd be going
Starting point is 02:44:41 I'm sending you know five thousand copies of ISOM to fucking Kabul or whatever. So our troops. I can't wait till he goes under. It's so weird. I'm gonna laugh at everybody. He had that video yesterday with like, here's all my favorite suckers, like all his friends. Yeah, all his friends.
Starting point is 02:44:55 He went, here's the indie creators I want to promote. And you go, yeah, but it's only guys who have sucked up to you so fucking hard. And it's also like 20 guys. Yeah. No one's gonna click on any of them. No. There's too many.
Starting point is 02:45:07 You should have done one. You did this on purpose so no one would help them. Well, he did it so that all those guys go, yeah, Eric's got my back. He spent five seconds in his video saying, check out the libertarian comic, The Voluntarist. Have you seen that guy? No.
Starting point is 02:45:23 It's a guy who runs around doing libertarian shit where he's like arguing about the age of consent. Yeah pretty much yeah. Sounds cool. Cody Titus 5 says Vito I'm sorry I said your pink outfit made you look like a pink farm animal a couple months ago I didn't know you'd spurg out so hard. That's an apology that's a good apology why can't you do those. I didn't even connect it to that. Russ against for 5 Australian says fire breathing back flip. Is that a Street fighter thing? Dalsum? Crazy cat for two Vito big leading getting meant lowest heel turn imaginable I am NOT big leading here. Russ against for 5 Australian says caps lock just eye bond for five says Vito your school Did have a 20 year reunion. Your name was briefly mentioned. Hmm. What?
Starting point is 02:46:01 Your school did have a 20 year reunion. Your name was briefly mentioned. Hmm. What? I don't know if that's a joke or not. Diamond G for 222 says Vito, can you promote on October for me? Yes. Rosi Dance for five says I'm trying to make my chats extreme and less boring for the big energy man himself. Crash for two. Hey, guys, Lauren Chen coming on tonight.
Starting point is 02:46:19 No, she's in a cell. Live from prison in Guantanamo Bay. Alex Reinhartt for five. Tony from Hack the Movies has kinda helped Mint Salad. He hasn't foundry, I have no idea. You've misspelled something. Michael Winning for five. Will Vito be hosting the Toyota Oink Tobu Festival?
Starting point is 02:46:36 That's a one. See, that's pretty funny. Hippie Terrace for five. I'm dead inside, but the show gives me an ounce of joy every Friday. Thank you. Tiki the Mighty for two. Says Vito doesn't like Mint Salad because of the diet. I made that joke already. Did show gives me an ounce of joy every Friday. Thank you. Tiki the mighty for two says veto doesn't like mid-sale because the
Starting point is 02:46:45 diet. I made that joke. All right. Did I make a joke on here? Just as bad. A disius for five. You know, I was in because depression, anxiety and mood swings never taken again because I want the old veto back counter separate sectors of two says counter side effects with more drugs. Dechalk for five. Thanks for the last boys. Glad the hog father Father could set you straight veto apparently EVS is losing weight Well, maybe not straight Johnson Duterson for five YouTube veto hot shit veto always with the big league Always with the big league Sturgery for five says Ricky ritardo found the Russian spies clearly Kato goodieing who else would call themselves a poly myth
Starting point is 02:47:23 Well wearing shorts with clockwise rotation Zedek quick sell for two your boy didn't do too bad did he? Jesus, but didn't do too bad, but I didn't do too bad. Did he are you getting off with that other guy? I think he wants Gino Bisconti to fuck him is what I got from that. Hey Gino. Look what I did Doesn't that make you want to fuck my little ass your dick? I think I'm gonna fuck your little ass. He's that's you wanna fuck my little ass? Is your dick hard too? Doesn't that make you wanna fuck your little ass? That's, he's getting off on cuck shit there. He is getting off on cuck shit.
Starting point is 02:47:49 He is genuinely a cuck. Yes. Yes. Ooh. Ooh. Well, he's not gonna like prison. He's a weird, he's a weird, weird boy. He might get, he might get prison.
Starting point is 02:48:03 Oh, that would be so funny. I mean, it would be funny. I don't know. I don't know what's gonna happen there. I can't follow this Aaron Imhol- there's too many guys doing too many things. But uh, Dave for five! Hey bus, where can a cool shirt like- you wanna get a shirt like that? Yeah, where can you get that shirt? Oh! Killdozer.Industries. Comics great, oink oink, reverse compliments, sandwich. I actually do need to update the Biggest Problem t-shirts,
Starting point is 02:48:31 but yes, from Kildozer.Industries, those are where they're available. Pigeon for 10 says, laughing my ass off, Vito had a Porky's hole. It was a Porky's hole. Yeah, you did have a Porky's hole. I mean, I didn't establish the Porky's hole, but it was there.
Starting point is 02:48:43 Dave for five, your boy didn't do too bad, Imhol didn't pull anything, he got got game so another man could steal his wife Yeah, I think I think you lose if at the end of it you're divorced right yeah You have no didn't that come later like he showed you know the thing like hey my wife left me And I'm a complete loser fucking idiot, but No, you didn't do too bad No you DID do too bad! You lost your fucking wife! Who was hot She was not terrible
Starting point is 02:49:10 It tolerated your like, your shitty shell Yeah it tolerated your little gay shit I think you fucked up George Peter Gastis is here Do you know this guy? I love this guy Oh yeah the blue guy The blue muppet guy Who weirdly made all the logos of my childhood.
Starting point is 02:49:25 And I'm like, wait, what the fuck? Wait, what? You know like Beyblade and like Cardcaptor Sakura and like all these children's properties or whatever? It's like all the, it was more my... Cardcaptor Sakura. You've heard of it. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:49:39 I was going through his portfolio and I'm like, wait, you made the fucking Beyblade logo? And he's like, yeah, yeah. I'm like, put that on a shirt. I mean I guess he probably can't anyway George Peter Gass this I told him it's can you got any like old press material sent it to me. I want that shit Hey, you did something can you give me something I get something can I get a free action figure from EBS? fucking it I Mean isn't that the whole point of the show is that we have a part where you put me on a scale and I get Free shit. I love free shit. What do you want? Okay? That's the show. That's what the bit is. I like free stuff
Starting point is 02:50:12 I love free stuff so much that it drives me crazy Uh-huh for five Canadian He says critical blast publishing and I have made a little president Trump sandbox children's book available on Amazon in critical blast Trump Sandbox Children's Book available on Amazon in critical blast love Trump So guys critical blast is a kind they're basically represent not run by a crazy black man Oh, so if you have a comic that needs help check out critical blast publishing which has a new little little Trump book Alex Reinhart five might as well have bought an inflatable table chair. Oh wait day for two how much for a signed mother's milk I am much I haven't figured out what I should sell those for Cuz I only have a certain amount, but I don't want to price them so high that I feel like an asshole
Starting point is 02:50:50 But you're gonna get more. I'm sure I'm gonna get more. I'm saying though. I told you I don't want to give away I Should raffle them off JM for two. No, not that's stupid JM for two You two should try and get that Tim Pool Kremlin money. I know, I wish. I almost got it. Dave for five says, Magga, Magga, Magga Trump 2024 and 2028. Magga, Magga Harris slept her way to the top. My initials are VG and I approve this message.
Starting point is 02:51:14 Oink. Nominee for two. Riley's mad because he has a small dick. Oh, that's terrible. Lawrence Devaney for two. This is Vito, biggest problems when I watch, when I want to smile. Oh yeah.
Starting point is 02:51:24 Oh, okay. Alex Reinhart for two. This is Vito looks Biggest problems when I watch when I want to smile. Okay. Alex Ryan Hart for two. This is Vito. Looks like sway from MTV with that rap. There you go. Good old sway. We're going to refresh super chats. Guys, get your last super chats in. Your boy didn't do too bad. Your boy did not do too bad. Your boy did not do too bad. Let's see, justIbun45australian, that Pro Veto color is the guy pulling it on the other side of the shower pipe. He loves it. Zach Reiss for two.
Starting point is 02:51:54 He says, I love you on PKA. I don't know if we mentioned this, but I was on the Painkiller Already podcast. They decided to upload it with all the video and audio unsynced, which is great. But it's a podcast, so you can just listen to it. You don't need to see my face anyway. I don't know which PAYK episode it was,
Starting point is 02:52:09 but go check it out and leave a comment. Let everyone know to come to Biggest. Good job. Tell everybody on PKA. Ha ha ha! Thanks a lot, guys. Tell them if you want a podcast where the audio is hopefully synced up. Check out Biggest Prom in the universe.
Starting point is 02:52:22 Pigeon for $10 says, can we pay $10 to have you skip the next super chat? I think that's a little too gamified. I like the idea though. Utah based Armenia for two This is veto censorship attempts are ham-fisted Yeah, JJ for five Johnny rocket found the biggest problem universe with veto in Maddox check the discord That is a video that Johnny Rockets has put together with AI voices of myself and a certain other guy. Frog Tony for five. I'm catching up. I was in that DM thread video talking about earlier is using more hibbity jibbity than Eric July. Yeah. 100% big league. Oh, I know he's in the big league. I know.
Starting point is 02:52:54 Well, 100% as a as a kind of fool me. What sort of league should I be in? Look at the size. There he goes again. I mean, I can't be in the small league. Mintz out. Just call me. We can nationalize can nationalize. No no no because people lie in private they lie and then they get in public and lie I don't know I can't give an apology on a podcast. I can't give it in a DM thread But you're not even like sorry at all I want everyone to subscribe to ASE presents more transactional shit and watch mint salads. Well, she said she wants promotion So I'm doing it
Starting point is 02:53:29 Presenting what she wanted tells you that they want promotion. You should promote them And uh Gaslighting I Look forward to Riley coming to my house and taping money to my door I will be blown out. Throbbered for five. First time catching the show live.
Starting point is 02:53:48 Thanks for the laughs, Dick the Prick and Vito the Guido. Wow, that's the nicest thing anyone ever called you. I know. Oh! So, I'm a G for 26, says the Team Guy Vito song. Vito, the gay team guy. 26 now! Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay! Vito, the gay team guy now it's 28. What did he say?
Starting point is 02:54:06 He said 26. Now it's 2601. It goes up by a penny? Yeah, it's just... No, it should go up by like a dollar. You should look more like man. 2601? That's retarded.
Starting point is 02:54:22 It should go up by a buck. Why a buck? Because it should go up by a buck. It should be 27. It's up a dollar! Why a buck? Because it should go up a dollar every time. Not everyone is loaded up with money to go up by entire dollars. Not everybody who doesn't have money needs to pay for this retarded song to play. You could have stopped it for good if you just participated in the game. I participated in a lot of games on this show. You shut it down, because I don't get the bit.
Starting point is 02:54:43 I don't understand why this is funny. Well, now I get the bit is I get $25 at a time we play the show so I like that bit Not mob man for five. Hey Richard. Did you really think you drive from Miami to Key West in a single day? I did I just didn't get I almost made it halfway out. I should have left before noon How far is my head left if I had left like an hour earlier? I would have gotten all the way to the tip. Yeah If I had left like an hour earlier, I would have gotten all the way to the tip Yeah Why were you trying to go to Key West? Because I thought it'd be a fun drive to drive from Miami out to Key West
Starting point is 02:55:13 I only got halfway down the keys. Did you do anything in Florida? I just told you what I did You just drove in a line? To the yeah, I saw everything there. What would you do? I don't know go to a pinball museum or some shit if they got a look at video go look at shit to buy I've not been to the pinball machine Museum do not judge the pinball museum. Okay. All right, the pinball museum is a hollowed fucking institution. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, pinball is fun. You don't like pinball. I Just don't need to go see a pinball museum I guess. I like to occasionally catch up on
Starting point is 02:55:46 what the pinball community is arguing about. I definitely don't need to go twice. One of my favorite things of the pinball community is a lot of people, one of the most prolific pinball designers of all time, where everyone, oh his pinball tables, those are the best ones, he makes the best pinball tables. And it turned out he was a huge pedophile and he molested a bunch of kids. How did the pinball table work? I don it turned out he was a huge pedophile anymore The pinball table work, I don't know And now everyone's like I kind of feel weird about owning that pinball. I mean they're like he was a good pinball designer This is a pinball Memorabilia to memorabilia when you own one of those the pinball guys come over your house
Starting point is 02:56:21 You know one of those Dave pedophile fucking machines Great. It's real smooth though and tight. Everything's like perfectly designed for a little boy's hand. It feels like every subculture has like this one guy, same for like the video game high score guys. That was one of the things with Billy Mitchell is that he got all this- He's a pedophile?
Starting point is 02:56:39 No, but one of the judges who gave him all his scores got out of his huge pedophile and went to jail for it. Was it that guy that lied about all the scores? He's been accused of lying about the scores, I'm pretty sure. Are you saying like impossible scores? Like a drag racer? That guy was the guy who was actually playing the game. This guy was the judge who worked at the thing that like did the scores. What?
Starting point is 02:56:57 So the judge- That guy was a pedophile? One of the guy- not the old guy, but like one of- they had multiple judges and one of the judges who did the scores for Billy Mitchell I believe if I'm getting this right turned out to be a huge pedophile. He's actually in jail He's been in jail for like 10 years or something. Maybe he's gonna be an Aaron Imholz jail. He might be so That's why that's why some of that Billy Mitchell drama goes. He goes. Yeah. Yeah, I got that score and you go Yeah, but I got to trust the pedophile judge. You got that score I don't know. I don't trust it anymore Let's see here on the job for two. Let's not forget that dick eats ass peach peach
Starting point is 02:57:31 Goldilocks for ten. I love toxic veto great new character. He's doing will you sublet so great swine 11 That's pretty close to good AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HELL HELL! or the fucking end. This is what you do to jokes. No. That's perfect. No, it's not perfect. You're gonna celebrate swine eleven? Because it doesn't mean nine eleven. It could mean anything. It could mean anything. You're celebrating it. Okay. Knucking futz for ten says, Vito, if you put as much everything in a banning pee-double
Starting point is 02:58:15 as you should in your diet plan, you'd be down thirty pounds. Yeah, more diet tips. Odysseus says, if you skip my comment, it does something. This has a ghost of tedious. Give all your money, everybody's going, I'm gonna give money to Dick instead of this show. Yeah, what do I fucking care? Go nuts.
Starting point is 02:58:30 Well, you should care. That's a problem. Why, you get money anyway. So what are you mad about? See, this is part of the problem. Is your bits of I don't care, I don't want money anyway. I think you start, I think the bit starts becoming real as you do the more, as you do the bit more.
Starting point is 02:58:49 I've agreed, I agreed when we set out to do the show, I said 500 bucks an episode. Anything above that is just gravy. I love gravy. This is a bad. I'm a big gravy boy. So thank you for all the gravy. Zetta Quicksilver two, Vito, you are our sunshine, we love you Vito.
Starting point is 02:59:07 Fogelodzfor5 says, do you two have enough of those old Pokemon decks to build? I've thought about getting my old Pokemon deck together. Well, I know we've talked about the biggest problem, gaming challenge, and I thought one of the rounds should be Pokemon cards. Sure, okay. I think that should be one of them. Yeah, we can do that. It's probably more fun. Should we limit ourselves to cards from a certain time period?
Starting point is 02:59:32 I don't know, let's breeze through these. We got, let's finish up. You're not going anywhere. Yeah, I am. Let's go. All right, Edgewise CL for five. How do y'all really feel about Redbar? You hate your boy Denny, but you gotta admit he's the man.
Starting point is 02:59:44 Guy's cool. I like Redbar. Hack the movie, again, feel about Redbar? You hate your boy Denny, but you gotta admit he's the man. Guys, cool. I like Redbar. I hacked the movie, again, I think Redbar's stuff, talking about Chrissy Maris stealing Christmas presents. Which Chrissy Maris? Again, a fight you're picking hurts all your friends. It's not a fight. It's not a fight. Hurts all your friends. Chrissy Maris gotta laugh along with that.
Starting point is 02:59:57 But you can't get called sad. It's really funny that Chrissy Maris stole Christmas presents. Just the way she brought it up is funny. Wouldn't go, wouldn't face her in public. I did make amends only talking shit and hurting friends She's on the podcast going you guys want to hear a funny thing I did and they're like oh what'd you do? Uh-huh, and she goes I saw a bunch of Christmas presents at the restaurant and I stole them It's just like the complete ignorance of everyone's like why the fuck would you that's horrible Anyway, you love fighting with women I've've noticed I just if you ask me about red
Starting point is 03:00:25 bar that's one of the funniest bits I think red birds ever done hacked the movies for five says veto horror movies are lame also veto Tony let's watch a Japanese cartoon with robots and a naked boy it's art Evangelion is art and we love it has man again for two says EVS asked you to jump you ask oh yeah that's
Starting point is 03:00:44 correct Judd Bronson for five you know the human pig have you broken your bike And we love it. Hazmat again for two. It says, EVS asked you to jump. You asked how high. That's correct. Judd Bronson for five. Vito, the human pig, have you broken your bike yet? HS Dante for five. Only 3,000 views on the new video, Vito. Wonder what happened there. Judd Bronson for five. Vito, did you say the last US mall opened in 2012
Starting point is 03:01:01 at Liberty New Jersey? No, it was built, dummy. And the American Dream Mall opened in 2019. Oh does that mean they started building it? I don't know. It looks like you're wrong. Can we finish 2020 like I said? Can we finish the super chats? You gotta hurry up. Okay, let's see. Joel Dickinson from Five says I was blocked on Twitter for saying I hate when mommy and daddy fight. I fucking hate that saying. I fucking hate that saying. I will fu- I wish I could fucking kill you when I say I hate when mommy and daddy fight. I fucking hate that saying. I fucking hate that saying. I wish I could fucking kill you when I hear I hate when mommy and daddy fight.
Starting point is 03:01:30 I hate when mommy and daddy fight. Okay. You should unblock that guy. I wish I could block your parents and your grandparents. You should respect the fans. Fuck you. You need to respect the fans. We're in excess for two Canadians
Starting point is 03:01:44 sell the mother's milks on whatnot. Okay. Play the song. You can sell tonight's mother's milk on to respect the fans. We're next is for two Canadians sell the mother's milk on what not. Okay, play the song. You can sell tonight's mother's milk on... Play the song. Oh, tonight's mother's milk. Oh, I'm gonna see you. A man who tweets about the Du Bois. What's in the box?
Starting point is 03:01:57 Get it over with. It's mother's milk. I keep telling you, I'm never gonna give you anything good until you start smashing things. Vito's booty, Vito's booty, Vito's booty, Vito's booty! It's fucking mother's milk! It's mother's milk! You got the wait? No, I haven't even started yet. I'm showing you that it's mother's milk. That was the point, because I will never give you anything good until you start smashing toys
Starting point is 03:02:28 See All right hold on yeah there go Whoa 292 and a half Holy shit. How'd you lose so much weight who cares here you go it's a mother's milk that's the end of the show what a pussy. You do it really hard. It's like fucking horrifying. Show us my top supporters on the board. Thank you everybody for supporting this show. I love all the fans. Big shout out to Mint Salad, Riley, Hack the Movies, Ethan Van Skyver, Josh Denny, Jeremiah Burbank from PVK, my good friend Seth at X9 Games, and everybody who I love with my transactional friendships.
Starting point is 03:03:31 I love you all. Peace and love. Peace and love. Peace and love! Alright, now it's gone. We forgot the box is still alive. What is it? Hammering a cardboard box?
Starting point is 03:03:42 Go nuts. There's a guy's cradle in there. No there isn't Shut up. Oh my god. There is Thankfully I didn't attack the box It's just mother's milk! It's just mother's milk! It's just mother's milk! You really thought you had me. You're such a fucking retard.
Starting point is 03:04:14 You thought telling me it was mother's milk, but you didn't know that I was all happy that I don't have to deal with this weight loss shit or whatever. Well, no, cause you did lose weight. I did lose weight, so why would I not get on the scale? Well, I didn't count on that. You didn't count on that you didn't see that coming Yeah, is it what would have happened if I said smash it you would have destroyed this yeah? I don't care about how would you have destroyed it with the hammer? Yeah, that's horrifying well
Starting point is 03:04:38 Alright well now I got the mother's milk so I now you could smash whatever you want all right now I got the fucking guy is cradle. I have a lot more show me it. Did you put up the top supporters on the board? Uh-huh Thank you to all our supporters. I know I need to update that graphic This has been the final episode of the biggest problem the next episode will have Ralph Which you guys can do whatever you do all right goodbye everyone bye I gotta go get dinner didn't ding it Yeah, it's a little fucked up. But, it's still playable and that's all that matters. I probably took $100 off the value, but whatever, it's going in a deck, it doesn't matter.
Starting point is 03:05:16 It's got a little crease on it. Did it really? A little bit. I don't wanna talk about it. What do you mean? I just I heard it I damaged the magic card because I'm an idiot and I got all excited you told me the second you said what if you smash it here's the hammer I probably should have read into it a little bit. It was the same thing I already did. It should have said this is clearly a trick of some sort.
Starting point is 03:05:40 You were so happy you lost weight. Good job. No no no no no no. People can't were so happy you lost weight good job People can't be happy that you lost that is correct. Well, everyone is gonna be happy I don't want to do that. I lost a lot of weight, but at least at least it's moving in the right direction Yeah, and we got this great. We're not gonna destroy this. Thanks to ever say now. I hope that guy I hope that guy I hope you heard this episode and he saw his two favorite hosts or best friends Again, about as close as you're gonna get to an apology from veto. I think Yeah, that's about right. Yeah, I agree with that I think you knew that coming into it too, sir And you do have veto the team guy on the Funko pop so you're not a big apology
Starting point is 03:06:22 Yeah, you're not you're also you're not blameless you're fucking around all right I love you Mitzel and my best friend everything's gonna be fine I'm oh I'm on to the gas lighting it's not gas lighting I have no bad things to say about that lady mm--hmm. All right. I just think her boyfriend could promote her a little better. You see... Let me tell you what social convention that you routinely violate with those two. Right. When you have a beef with one, you bring up the other one. That's very inappropriate. But I only have a beef with Riley. I have no beef with Mint so...
Starting point is 03:07:02 Yeah, but when I'm saying Mint has a problem with you, you say, I just think your boyfriend... You see how you shift it to the other one. Yeah. You know? You gotta be honest in life, you know? You're not being honest. I love both these young people. I want them to succeed. There's no reason to talk about the other when you're dealing with one.
Starting point is 03:07:22 Sometimes I have some tough criticism that I think will help them out Okay, all right. Goodbye everyone the autistic review of Terminator would get a lot of views Yeah, but just because just because you think you're right doesn't mean that people want to do it. That's true So that's it. I've heard I've heard women so and doesn't want to do it doesn't why doesn't matter you gave your advice That's it. That's heard why Mintzalan doesn't want to do it. Why does it matter? You gave your advice, that's it. That's the end of the advice giving part. Like I said, I want to use Streamlab and you kept like, you don't want to do this. You don't want to do this. You know, I was like, I'm just fucking checking it. I get where they're coming from if it was like that. Do you want to use Streamlab? Did you look into it more? I did. And are we gonna use it or what?
Starting point is 03:08:04 Well, I was playing with it. I couldn't get the cameras to come up on it yet I just think Streamlabs is fucked so see but you've already said that so now now see how it's it's becoming like Well, do it this way do it this way. It's like I understand. I have another show You know that I'm looking at tools for sure Just letting you know Think about stream labs is alright. I'm just fucking with you. All right. What a great show Bye

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