The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 184

Episode Date: April 5, 2025

We're going live. I'll post the link. You can start it if you want. Boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop bo and oh are we gonna start let's start Twitter let's start where it's nice and juicy veto what the fuck are you doing a lot of people lost a lot of good friends over what are you alive we're live what is this shit that you're talking about here you're not gonna fuck that you'd fuck that Oh being veto on Twitter. I've just been tweeting about Trump. So you know I know Josh retweeted it. Yeah, let's see where this let's see where this gem is that you couldn't keep to yourself

Why we go? Here we go What's wrong with my toes Twitter nothing wrong with my Twitter? I'd hit it, you said. Mousy situation. The topic is a woman who looks eight years old forever. She's got some kind of a genetic... She looks like an old lady in a little body. It doesn't look like a kid. That's some kind of reverse pedophile you said to me. This is a kid

I'd be like that's the weirdest fucking kid I ever seen it looks like an old lady trapped in a little kid body And I'd hit it and I'd hit it cuz fuck it you only live once That would be a good that would be a good t-shirt just Jeffrey Epstein's portrait What was your shirt idea from last week? This guy's wife and all I got was this shitty t-shirt I am planning to add to the store. I have to design a good one.

It'll have a big arrow so you can stand next to it. Is it gonna have black shirts or is it gonna be sold out? It'll have black. There'll be a couple different colors of the I fucked this guy's wife. Please do the YOLO. And all I got was this shitty t-shirt. And you want a Epstein YOLO shirt. Oh, YOLO, yeah.

I would wear that. I mean he is, let's be real, of all the YOLO guys. He said, well I'm wear that. I mean he is let's be real of all the Yolo guys He said well, I'm only on this planet once maybe me and the president can fuck a bunch of kids I got these little baby teeth. I'm gonna fucking blackmail a bunch of politicians. That's fucking dope I'm gonna do for Israel, too. Maybe that'll maybe that'll save me I mean he he went for it didn't work out, but he went for it, but that's what Yolo is that is yellow Yeah, it's not like y'all are all in good stuff. He was all in What if he had saved what if aliens had attacked and he used his blackmail to like make everybody do the right thing?

He was fucking kids with the Prince of England Okay, like as far as Yolo goes like he was like that's like being on top of shit coin You know you're like how can I possibly ride it down from here? Would you stop an alien invasion? That's the question. I mean tagline of the movie. You know it's like a trolley problem, but See now I see a movie poster of him looking to the skies and tagline would you fuck a kid to stop an alien invasion this way Yolo the About shit like this because nobody wants to hear nobody fixes. Play this! Nobody fixes a kid! Look at it. That is a little girl.

I would have sex with her. I don't care. Listen. I swirled as a tiny little girl. That's a little girl! And my parents talked at a very young age. They were like, look, any guy that's interested in you, any person that's interested in you, you have to read into them. She's got sad old eyes. There's a chance. That's how you know it's not a kid. It looks like one of those little cupid dolls, you know, those little cute precious moment things! I grew up knowing that and that was scary. I was scared to date. I was scared to flirt with it. There's a chance

You could fuck that laugh are you kidding me she's gonna start laughing like that your jokes and you're gonna have a hard penis Ah, good luck. Look, I'm not saying it would be the most enjoyable sexual experience, but just to say that I fucked a weird little kid midget or whatever, fuck it. Definitely don't say it like that! Well come on, it's funny! It's not funny! It's funny to you! And then I had to end. Whenever I go on a date with a guy I'm not sure if he's a creep. Say yes! I can't say yes! I was like... What was the conversation like? Ah, come on, come on.

She's a podcast star too, so... What? Well, I'm saying, you know, you'd be dating a celebrity at that point. What the hell does that sound? I don't know. Anyway, I did post on Twitter that I would hit it. Meaning fuck it. I thought was... Yeah yeah. Yeah meaning had sex with the little ever I want to McDonald's had that a classic ad blunder cuz they didn't know what I'd hit it means

I talked to their ad department after that. Oh, really? Yeah. Why you guys like what do you do? That's so important I'm like, well, you know how you guys said you'd have sex with a cheeseburger That's why you need digital marketing. It was a guy next to a cheeseburger. It's a double cheeseburger. I'd hit it. I'm a dollar menu kind of guy. That would be an awesome ad now. Now if you put that ad up. A broccoli hair guy going, I'd fuck that cheeseburger. I'd say that would work on today's meme culture.

Yeah, it'd be cool if you're like, oh shit, I'd fuck a large fries. Welcome to Jammu the Box, where we only have sex with one out of every 20 hamburgers unlike McDonald's that has sex with all of them so your odds are way better they'd change their ordering procedure did they like would you like to fuck it would they would they would you like to fuck at McDonald's today I'll fuck it number one with no onions and bitch you what you want to fuck I want to fuck I want wanna fuck a grill McChicken.

I'll give you a little ketchup packet of lube, you know? No, no, no, no. It's just a word. It's not about fucking hamburgers and stuff. Yeah, but like- What are you talking about? You're messing it up! I'm sorry, I haven't thought through your genius marketing plan.

It's just like, yeah, what do you wanna fuck today? I forgot, you're the digital marketing king. I'll fuck a Arch Deluxe. I'll fuck an Arch Deluxe, please. And then they just you just eat like normal though. Okay, you know so fucking is it yeah, I got there clever But you have sex with the french fries? No! Okay, well now I know. The milkshake. They come in like a fleshlight looking package

Fleshlight milkshake now I'm in. Now I'm all the way in. All right, there's the theme. That's why we're the number one podcast on the internet. I think we're doing good. We are. We're doing good. Why the fuck don't we have 20,000 subscribers? Biggest problem in the universe.

Hackamania. Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe The only show that ranks every problem in the universe I'm your host, Dick Mashman, join me as always Oh wait, I forgot to read the thing From Quarterink's coffee schemes to Vito's money making dreams

Join me as always is Vito G. Smallsley Thank you for having me, Dick Gabe Benitez came up with that one. What an exciting show. And then he said, please play my stinger tonight. It's from the something Gmail. And I searched for it and I couldn't find it.

Congratulations on not getting your stinger played because we couldn't find it. Thank you, Gabe. Way to go, Gabe. You nailed it. I'm sure it's a wonderful stinger. Well, it's a new show. It's a whole new era for Dick Masterson. Oh, because I'm sure it's a wonderful stinger. Well, it's a new show. It's a whole new era for Dick Masterson.

Oh, because I'm married? You're now a married man. Yeah. You know, I walked in the house, you just look defeated, the lady's going, Ah, the thingy, dee dee dee dee! The whole dynamic has changed. And I said, Chief Dower. She has all the power.

I thought you said you were taking the dog for a walk. So you're married now. Very delightful ceremony you had. Really? Oh, I don't know. I don't know what was... We had fun. It was fun.

Yeah, it was fun. I helped fix your paint by numbers picture. Are you the one who black faced it? I didn't black... Somebody else started black facing it. You know, I don't know why we had that stupid thing well nobody fit I didn't first of all it was way too much busy work for the drunks at that party at the front my wife really She said I saw people do this at a wedding and everyone loved it

I said you saw people sit there like they're painting on rice and this little fucking thing at a three-hour wedding They left I'm like we did one of these and it took nine hours of yeah Backbreaking like it's made in China, so they don't give a fuck. They can't even see what they're doing Right and it's like this curly It's like somebody spilled spaghetti and you have to paint every piece of spaghetti a different color Those of you don't understand there was a paint by Numbulls numbers picture of the bride and groom at the front paint that by Numbull Yeah so it had these little like little like

Squiggles you're supposed to take the appropriate paint color and paint it in and like one lady was there for like an hour Really into it and was like doing it precisely and then some asshole just comes along and goes what if dick was black and just starts And it was you but it was not me. I know 100% that it's you shut up I came in when you were already black-faced you black somebody else What I look like you surprisingly was a black guy that was the most surprising part I was one of the well I'm saying there's no black people at the wedding, but there was some security guards loitering around probably one of them I said women there. I added you notice that helpful I just added a helpful outline. I added your teeth added your eyes. I saw that yeah

I saw that the teeth that look great Give you a big smile. You know what though. I know Johnny fucking loved it. Johnny was laughing Johnny thought it was the funniest thing in the world He's like Well now we can't even use it So fix you guys fix it print out another one you have to? Like for us for fun. So fix it, you guys fixed it. Print out another one. You have to order them, it's canvas. Okay well I'm sorry. Now who knows how much it's gonna cost.

Somebody else started fucking up your paint by numbers. I tried to salvage it. I saw it, I was like goddamn it, goddamn veto. I know he did this. I didn't do that part. I know that he did this. Somebody else black faced you. I swear to, if I black faced you you, I would take credit for it.

But once you were black-faced, I said, well, obviously we're past the point of no return. I might as well make it a nice black-face. So I tried to add some shading and color and I think it helped. I wish we had a picture of it. We should, did you guys keep it, I hope? It's somewhere. And I drew a cool picture of a muscle guy in your wedding registry. I saw that. Thanks a lot. You're welcome. Yeah

So we had a fun time. Mm-hmm Okay, is that the conclude the Reminiscing you have nothing you have nothing to say about that fun event. We had a fun time. Everybody was there It was great. Who else who was there? Johnny was there. Where was Sean? Out of town. He didn't go he didn't he wasn't feeling good. No some people wasn't feeling good He really wasn't some people have been sick lately. There's been a lot of sick I've been sick all fucking week get a taco bar, which I gotta say was pretty good Was it I should have stole good cuz I didn't get to eat a goddamn thing

I should have stole some honestly. I was like I should have have took a plate. You should have taken it all. I know. There was all this meat and fries left over. I'm surprised that you weren't hoarding there at the end. Well, because we came back here, and I was like, well, what am I going to put it in? And I'm not going to go, hey, Dick, can I get like a Tupperware to steal your taco meat? That's totally normal behavior. I would expect that.

I'm all right. I don't need any taco meat. OK. All right. Well, I'm sure more wedding details will come forth. It was a wild night, full of stars., Mom, I'm sure more wedding details will come forth. It was a wild night. Full of stars. Had fun.

I'm glad. You looked great. Randy was good. I said, who's that guy? Yeah, well, that was almost going to be my problem was everyone telling you you clean up good, which infers that you're an ugly piece of shit 99% of the time. Saying it directly. Saying it directly.

They said, wow. Not ugly, sloppy. Just like you should dress up more because you look so much better than you usually dress. But I don't have any reason to dress up. That's the problem. That reaction from people should be a reason. The only people I interact with is you every Friday.

And then I go home and I lock myself in my bathroom doorless apartment and I don't talk to anybody else. And windowless. And windowless. Doorless, yeah. My cats don't come to anybody else. And windowless. And windowless. Doorless, yeah. My cats don't come to me and they go, hey buddy, you're looking like shit.

Nobody cares. You should change that too. I got nothing. I mean, it's just like. The only possible, what do you call it, societal outing I would have would be playing in the latest Magic the Gathering pre-release, but I can't do that because it's every Friday.

Did you get those SpongeBob cards? There might be one tomorrow. I did get the SpongeBob cards. I didn't get them I get them there hundred bucks. I was like, oh fuck you I opened I didn't get the special card though. What's the special card? Well, cuz each one of them comes with a bonus card and the comment what It's just a they have the standard bonus card that you get in pretty much all of them Which is a nice little command tower very nice What do you mean a command tower, which is a nice little Command Tower. Very nice. What do you mean a Command Tower? Command Tower is a land card that is played in Commander decks.

You have one in your sliver deck. It's SpongeBob's Pineapple House. OK, that's fine. It's a nice little card. Krusty Krab would be better. Krusty Krab, sure, you could make your own. But if you're lucky, you could get one of the alternate bonus cards, which are, I think, probably like a 130 chance.

And there's the smothering tile with Mr. Krabs basking in money, which is pretty great. And they also have the counterspell, you know the one where SpongeBob's looking like retarded or whatever? Yeah, that's the one, that's cool. So they have the regular version of that card, but there's an alternate bonus one that does the spelling where all the letters are interchanged. They didn't do the spelling in the other one? You have to get the bonus version to get the fuck that Fuck that everybody's trying to get the bonus spongebob cards right now. I Will be having however on my whatnot channel a spongebob break

We're gonna take every card and you get a random card from the spongebob set by yeah Participating come to whatnot comm slash invite slash veto comedy I like how you texted me called me DM me and then texted my wife to say the spongebob I said I like it. I said I like it. No no no no no no no no you said specifically to me Hey, I said I like it. You said tell me when those spongebob cards go on sale I want to get them when a friend tells me I want a thing I Go above and beyond I know I get a message Why the fuck is VV know even as you are responding to me on anything else

And I knew they were gonna sell out and they did sell out and then I said hey I bought those spongebob cards everybody's ripping on me for buying a shit ton of them guys I'm gonna resell them not keeping a thousand dollars. We all you're reselling. Okay. We all know yes was freaking out He's like well. I don't even understand what's going on. Why did we spend $1,500 on spongebob? Why did you not? What are you talking about? Why is there a cyber frog game there you go? And then it could be in there with his kids so I've passed your kids to fuck up So I post hey, I got all the spongebob cards, and then I get a response from Corgan, who's working on the Maniac available on Indiegogo, and he goes, you son of a bitch, I just wanted

a Squidward card, and now I'm never going to be able to get one. And I was like, dude, they're still on the site right now. And he went, oh never mind. And then he went and he bought them. I know, I clicked on it and I was like, ah, a hundred bucks. Actually you saw the Deadpool cards that came out on April 1st Deadpool Deadpool Marvel the Marvel character, okay, they released a special Deadpool drop that one's actually immediately sold out So I don't want that shit. I just wanted a spongebob but too much

well if you want some spongebob cards, maybe I'll find it in my heart to You would never when your birthday rolls around I already bought her a100 milk tub or whatever the fuck that's a gift for you Let's be honest It's not funny. It's not funny that you got her the milking things that Chrissy had it's pretty funny And it's not funny that you said save me some That would be like from veto and I'm like, oh obviously a thing to store his wife's tit milk. That's a Vito present. Okay, and a nice little gift receipt Says save me some. Save me some I know I have another present for you. I know you got a kid on the way, you know kids like toys

Well, of course what child doesn't want a delightful You know, kids like toys. Well, of course, what child doesn't want a delightful Gamer Boy bathwater. This contains a Vito. It's me. Look, it's me. You're selling water You're selling special edition water on your it's Vito's bathwater as made famous by Bell Delphine Look at that little guy in there and you know, you just shake it around and you got a little glow It's a snow globe globe there you go Gamer boy bath water what the fuck am I supposed to do with this? Well, I'll just treasure it forever the thing on top is misaligned so the sticker is sticking off on the side You can trim the sticker. Why don't you put it's like there's room over here. I don't have a circle cutter

I need one of the circles. It's circled, but it's like it's over It's too far over cuz I did it with scissors because I didn't get it perfect. It's close enough How come it's a stormtroopers uniform? Well because I'm obviously famous for my Star Wars commentary And also it's very hard to get the Lego pieces. I had to get whatever ones were cheap So luckily stormtroopers they They made a million of them So this is what you're doing. This is my bonus gift for my patrons We've been waiting so long you got another bonus get two gifts Jesus Christ because they waited so long for the plush that they also get the veto bath

They're gonna unsubscribe cuz I got too much of your shit. No, no their whole houses will be covered in veto trash now Those you cannot boy those you can can well because they originally was gamer girl That was Bell Delphine's bath water. So I made the gamer boy. He's a gamer boy. Bell Delphine's not a girlie. She's a woman So yeah, the gamer boy bath water. Thanks. Those those I don't know if you can get them Maybe I'll maybe I'll give one out somewhere Okay, I'll have them at hack-a-mania if anyone wants you're gonna bring a tub of your That's it the rest of them go to page and then the water It's out

Anyway, well, maybe your kid will enjoy shaking that thing around. We'll go. That's uncle Vito in there. He's my favorite I'm gonna shake the kid around if he starts seeing All right, Fun Uncle Vito. Can't leave him alone with the kid, but otherwise he's great. Crybaby businesses. Crybaby businesses, that was you. You're the winner. Dream ideas. Which I believe we have a clip coming for that soon.

A what? What do you mean? We got a great clip of all the more consent dumb digging into the history of that police body cams the most confusing problem I'm like okay but what about them you know police body cams am I so glad I get them or like they're bad because of what's on them I'm just a believing that no would get my police body cam footage? That's the thing null chasing down my shit Well, we appreciate it having Reketa I thought we had a great show Let's see let's see let's read some some people were fucking pissing and moaning SS

Jack and every fucking Keno casino clip channel went do you believe they're joking about this? Can you believe that they went to Juju and Veto the Peto's podcast? Guys, we don't care. Whatever you did, we did. They're not even funny. The best comment was on one of those things, they said, well, this just proves Maddox won because these guys can't even get 600 views

between the three of them. But if Maddox uploaded a video tomorrow would have like a hundred thousand views We got like thousands of views, what are you talking about? We get thousands of people watching live Maddox uploaded a video that got like 15,000 views I have no idea what fucking universe that guy was living in I think Maddox could shoot himself in the head and he wouldn't get as many views as we have Dude, I don't know what Maddox could do to get views at this point Maybe make a second video about what kind of seafood is based.

Oh man. You know? I've been talking about- Is it swordfish? Because it's like the S word, shit, which is cool as shit. Like me. I don't even know if he actually said that in that video because I couldn't get through more than two seconds of it, but that sounds like a Maddox quote.

Islamophobia. Here's why tariffs are bad. That whole expose, sometimes I look on his channel, because the original expose had like 100,000 views or something. And now he had to delete it and re-upload it and nobody fucking watched it. No one cares. He wasted like five years on that fucking thing. Yeah, he's wasted ten years. and now Eric July is doing the same thing

What the fuck? Guys, you're not good at this Stop making little exposes Nobody cares if we're really bad guys Oh, hey guys, I mean, I know it's funny what they're doing, but they're really bad. They are actually bad They're really genuinely bad guys and sociopaths. Yeah. Wooo! So they're not funny guys. I don't think these guys understand. Like they might operate in a space where somebody's...

They don't. They're total fucking assholes. They're just crying because they're getting made fun of. I think they believe like, and maybe it's true that like in their space if they were labeled a bad guy, like yeah, they are in like a cancel culture types like air to a nice base I don't know well if you think so he's a fucking asshole saying he would get canceled for like not loving Jesus enough or something You know like he doesn't love Jesus at all. I know well. That's the thing though He plays he plays the game, but I'm saying they operate in a space where they're like oh, we have to have a good reputation We love the audience and blah blah blah blah blah and like we're like, oh, we have to have a good reputation, we love the audience, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

And we're just like, yeah, we're scumbags. What? I don't know. I'm not a scumbag. Sure. I'm an upstanding gentleman. Who doesn't, who you know what I definitely don't do? Make false police reports on executives

at Fortune 500 companies who have nothing to do but sit around and fuck with me all day for really trying to fuck with their life and give them a police record and for no reason. Eric has apparently filed, not just against Riley, there's also a gentleman named Chris. Which is funny, because Riley's a fuck and he likes it, he thinks it's funny. What did Chris Bagan do? He went to the warehouse and took a picture of it? After Eric said said my warehouse I was like trying to be friendly with him because it was like at the beginning and he's like well I'm into comics. I'm a business guy. He wasn't into comics. He just supported the whole like let's do it

I'm shit. Yeah, let's do it. You know a parallel thing right? Yeah, he's like a libertarian guy I think Chris Bagan, and he said Allah. There's a former Eric July fan. Let's put it that he lives He lives like two blocks away from him. He knows him personally. I don't know if Eric owns a house in the neighborhood, but I know Chris Beggin does. He said, I'll help you out. I'll help you with numbers and stuff,

because I have like sales... Yeah, and I'm interested in what you're doing. I don't know what his background is. I've been suckered in by the sales pitch, and I want to be a part of the team. Yeah, and then Eric kind of turned on everyone and started being an asshole. So Chris was like, oh, you're kind of an asshole.

And Eric's like, fuck you, I'm not an asshole. So then Eric went on, Eric July went on Nick Roketestream and said he has a private warehouse. So Chris Bacon drove over and took a picture. He's like, it's not a private warehouse, it's right here. He tweeted that and within three hours, Eric called the fucking police to try to get him the same stalking charge secret warrant

that he got put on Riley. Meet me in a gas station outside of town. You know the one, wink, wink. The one with the whiskey. This guy's got a, I don't. Psycho. How does he not understand? I would think like, if you're really, like libertarianism is your whole life,

you would understand the concept of public and private property on such an intimate and detailed level that you'd go, well of course someone can drive into a business park and take a photo. How could I possibly stop them? Pretty much anyone could drive anywhere. Yeah.

Except for an airport. I would almost say if Eric Jilai was a normal retard, I'd be like, well, maybe he's so stupid that he doesn't understand how property works. But I go, this is a guy who specifically advertised this. He's an accelerated retard. Yeah. He goes, I understand the government

on such a deep and intimate level that it is illegal to take pictures of my parking lot. Oh, shoot, a devoted booth. Hibbity-dibbity. Which makes it so much more absurd. Why would you call the cops? That's like a really low scumbag Maneuver, it's really weird

Yeah It doesn't make like what what is gonna? What are the cops gonna do like well a guy didn't take a picture of your they're gonna fucking rest them Eric's gonna make up a bunch of shit He said that he said that Chris Bacon was disgruntled didn't he say it was like stalking him basically He tried to get him a stalking and harassing thing which is I mean that's like in the real normal people world that aren't joking about fucking little children on Twitter all day That's she's a grown adult. Come on. That is a beautiful grown woman That means something that means something it's not nothing cuz you got no audience

You can't say like why people go up to you like why do you have this stalking charge? You go like I took a picture of a guy's warehouse. They like I don't believe that I think you stalked somebody I also crazy. It's the law of You know now Riley has put out a bounty he says go to the warehouse take a fucking picture some guy We shot I think we locked it on the line. I dis about that completely how much offering how terrible I? Mean if I was I need to know how much to disavow axis I would literally just drive through the parking lot every day I wouldn't I would eat a hot dog in the parking lot piss on a tree and leave I Guess you get arrested for the last part anyway pissing on trees pissing on trees. We got to legalize that legal in Texas

Anyway, I don't know everybody's talking guys probably. Blowing guys probably. Blowing guys. Police at gas stations outside of town. Blowing your warehouse employees. The only reason he got those uh those scissor lifts. You're gonna call the cops on Chris Bacon? Laser eyes? What'd he do? What an insane person. I don't know. Doesn't his wife stop? What are you doing? Don't call the cops on Chris Bacon. Well it's also a complete waste of your time. Like look just work. I'd be pissed if I on Chris Bacon. Well it's also a complete waste of your time. Like look, just work. I'd be pissed if I was Chris Bacon. I have a pretty, everyone knows that I have a long fuse. I think Chris Bacon is saying like, you know, get this expunged or I'm gonna take some sort of action.

Expunge my nuts. Yeah. Get your wife to come over in like a little, like a, you know, a maid outfit. Yeah. You know, 17th century maid outfit. You know? People might take pictures. What can I wash, will ya?

People might take pictures. Today is the day, you gotta do the voice. You gotta do the voice. You have to do the voice. Oh, mercy. Ah, well, we were gonna, we are still going to watch the second installment. I think we were both a bit wiped out

and sick from our exciting weekend. Yeah. But we plan to watch the second installment of the Eric Jilai copumentary very soon. Don't forget to catch the first one, which is now available for free on our channel. Yeah, the second one's not going to be free. So I don't think you're going to get out and stop patronizing us. Unless you give $100 in super chats tonight. You know, who could, anything could happen. No, we're not, that's not how it works.

SS Jacken says, the biggest problem in the universe is when two hosts constantly talk over their guest, who's telling a very interesting story, repeatedly asking the same question over and over again, while the guest answers coherently, Jesus, Jesus Christ. And he says it like, Jesus Christ like that. I've been getting a lot of, you're interrupting the guest too much stuff. I like to think we're keeping the show, you know, we're moving it along.

Some, I don't know. Who fucking cares? Who fucking cares? It was a great show. None provided. We get three fucking guys in a room screaming at each other. They might interrupt a little bit.

All right, just, well, listen to the fucking show, shut up up. What else you get what other show do you have to listen to? What's in your life? What's in your life? No one's interrupting anything cuz you have no friends. It's just you talking about shit and no one interrupts ever Yeah, you got nothing else to do talking about no other show as good as this So fuck you you get every other show is shit every other shit. I really show every other show is shit I can't find any other shit. I really think every other show is shit. I can't find any other podcasts I like None provided said vetoes living space is so unclean. There's cockroaches in his dreams. We dream about cockroaches like Kafka

What was going on? I don't have cockroaches in my current place. I used to have you know say dreams I've been in a variety of LA and I've been a you know I've had apartments that had cockroaches. When I lived in the fucking South Central cockroach city, when I lived in Vallejo, cockroach city, you can't really do anything about it. No, they're everywhere. Yeah, people always, you know what? That is a problem that I should have brought in

at some point, but people who think- You gonna do it now? No, but it's just people who think, oh, the reason you have cockroaches is because you're dirty. It's like, the reason I have cockroaches is because I moved into a legacy LA apartment that already had cockroaches.

And the only way to possibly kill them is to put a tent over the whole fucking thing and spread poison gas around my home. I don't think that will even stop them. No, it doesn't fucking work because they'll just come from another. Yeah, it can get worse. Okay. Let's be, let's be clear though. I've been in this current place for like seven years.

I've seen one roach the entire time I've been there. So, and when you see a roach, you go, oh, fuck it might breed.ach the entire time I've been there, so. And when you see a roach, you go, oh fuck, it might breed, and then you gotta hunt. I hated that. I had a big fat roach in my house. No, no, it's not a euphemism. And it goes behind the fucking oven,

you go, well I can't just forget about it because it might lay a million eggs, so I gotta spend the next two hours hunting one fucking roach, which which I had to do and it sucked Okay, lieutenant search his quarter pounder is really giving Eric July run for his money as the greatest businessman on YouTube Yeah, did he make all that money that he needed for his cake up so fucking retard I? Hope he I hope great things happen to him, but I Don't know man. Just seeing that guy cry when I'm like,

you're retarded and make millions of dollars being retarded. Just count your blessings. Stop crying. You contribute nothing to the world. Stop being such a mooch. You made a million dollars crying. It's not even, we already have coffee. Yeah.

You don't need any more coffee. You're making, I mean, that guy's clearing multiple six figures and all he did for a year was cry about Budweiser being woke. That's literally all he did every day for a year. And he goes, I had to buy an $80,000 kick-up machine. You didn't have to do that. You didn't have to do any of this.

To Catch a Dotson says, Vita was on fire this episode between covering for Nick's kids in the t-shirt, bit, excellent VEETS covering for Nick's kids I don't know what that means well it's like I said sometimes you're having a cocaine fight and a kid walks in the room oh yeah that's true hit him in the face with a cocaine snowball oh no that wasn't meant for you I hope that doesn't come out in the hair Alexander for a second I thought Nick was wearing a novelty fake tattoo sleeve as a joke. Oh, a lot of people commented on Nick's tattoo. I didn't realize that was new.

I guess so. I mean, I guess I've just never seen him with a shirt off, you know? Is that a new tattoo? Is that a new thing, having your shirt off? Well, I don't, I thought his little America fucking tank top was kinda cool. Yeah it was. Yeah.

It's a me Yoshi-o. Most tattoos are retarded so who cares. Last time I watched Nick was back in the lull suit days. His voice sounds so different now. A lot of people said his voice is higher now. Maybe so. It's possible the coat collapsed some of his like nasal passages. He's doing like a reverse Howard Stern.

Like he started out like, ahhhh, and then at the end he's like dead. Practically dead. At least he hasn't had his whole fucking nose collapse like Artie, but I think Artie was snorting heroin, which rots. It's a lot more nose to collapse than Artie. It's a lot more nerves to collapse on Artie. Drown the Poor says, Vito's dream ideas and his enthusiasm for them reminds me of my friend tripping on LSD for 20 hours

and telling me about his epiphany where he understood the entire universe after watching this YouTube video about time or string theory or something. That's what LSD does. It makes insignificant things feel good. Well, that's not at all what Vito had a great idea. Yeah.

That was not drug fueled at all. It was a pretty good, I had some people go, a lot of people were like, I kind of get what you were going for for I think you could have tricked a fucking college Sponsoring that shit the condom wrapper isn't even torn correctly the groove part is where you tear so you better fix that Little mock-up was torn run. How has I'll say this John dishwasher people are loving I think there's a future for John dishwasher Steven what was John dishwasher John dishwasher was just an idea in my head where I said name for a character

Oh, yeah dishwasher and you're like that's retired. I'm like now that's gonna be the future Steven uphill. Yeah when you get AI when I get AI All the John dishwasher should I can make an AI to watch your movie and like tell you what I thought about it It's gonna be great. Yeah, it's gonna be pretty cool Steven. Unhill says how has he never mentioned the consent Dom ever before? Yeah, that's what I thought it's like How is this never been mentioned before and there's pictures you want to do a veto this projects? Segment because I probably got it. I could go on my computer. I got some yes Yeah, I'm trying to think there's some good stuff

I'll get to 20,000 subscribers only a lot of great ideas Mr.. Andy Creighton says no viewer has ever asked veto why they don't have more guests on the show. I agree with that Look we got to figure out we should have some guests guests are good Herb beta patch says there's zero downsides to refusing the femboys offer. Vito just has to stop trying to squeeze everyone in his life for all they're worth. The zero downside is I have another person in my house

causing trouble and making noise. He said there's zero downsides to refusing. To refusing? Yeah, just say no. Oh, OK. It's free labor. I think I did refuse. Martin O'Keefe says,

the consent time isn't a bad idea, but the execution is terrible. Honestly, retarded design. I agree, it's a very bad design. I'm not- There you go. I was not a great graphic designer back then, and I'm still not the greatest graphic designer now. So, luckily AI can just-

Honestly, I should, as AI a I hate design a condom wrapper yeah although I don't think it'll do that I don't think it'll design condoms I tried to have it do I tried to design condoms I tried to chat GPT give me a Africa it was a Adobe would not let me make condoms in their AI generator what yeah and I'm like what's wrong with I shit man offensive. It's it's offensive It's good. Yeah, it's a positive thing. What is an eight-year-old get a hold of my an eight-year-old can't afford Adobe Photoshop, okay, AI really does not want me chat gpd really does not want me to generate women crying I've noticed you can make a big dong in Mario maker

I bet you can't make a condom in Photoshop. I was trying to make some thumbnail for the show of a lady crying with a game controller because we were complaining about that. And it's like, you know, we just don't want to show women in distress. And I'm like, oh, come on. I'm like, can you show her with a new surround her neck

being strung up and pissing herself out of fear so I can jerk off to it? And it's like, no, I can't do that either. It's so aggravating. Watching their shit, watching the AI tech bros talk about how everything's gonna change and all this shit's gonna change. But they all have to handicap all the technology

to make it retarded and terrible. How are you gonna make a movie if you can't have a condom? How are you gonna make a movie if I need to generate a blood spatter and I have to put, cover her in red ink like a pen just exploded is what I have to use. This is gonna be amazing when everyone can generate their own movies of like Sesame Street.

Yeah, that's gonna be awesome, bro. And every time you prompt it, the character is inexplicably changed to black half the time and you're like, no! I'd like to make a movie about man's existence. Whoa, I don't think so, buddy! John Dislossher can't be black, that's offensive. He can only be black.

This is completely- What are you doing over there? What am I doing? What are you doing? Mine's fine. You're cranking that thing off. I'm not cranking shit. Oh you have fucked up big time now buddy You have fucked up big time you tore the mic stand off the table and you're all nervous So you're gonna put it back together badly so it'll fall apart again Is this something or is this fine? That's fine but it's not screwed on in the bottom It doesn't screw on in the bottom

Oh okay, mine's together. It's you got to tighten it on the bottom or else it's gonna happen again With what? Underneath Underneath it's a fucking clamp What do you mean with what? The clamp is fine, the clamp's in there The clamp is fine it just popped off You gotta, you gotta tighten the clamp

There's nothing to clamp Right here at the bottom I'm not doing it. I'm not touching it. It's okay. You know clearly I think your mic stand breaks And it's my hanging off it like a fucking I tried to move it to fucking inches the whole thing falls apart He's aren't rated. I'm currently got a replacement mic stand for the gas never complaining about it Oh, I don't know why they can't get on the mic cuz the mic stand sucks. They're stupid. No, it's not They're stupid. It's cuz the mic stand was dog shit. It's cuz they're it's cuz there's it's cuz they have no confidence

Well, I'm glad we replaced their confidence with a working. That was frightening Knock your fucking mic down Have a very exciting segment for you dick. Uh-huh. It's called voted up Green Wolverine's gonna do the same shit for better. You just wait and see And i'll be crying in the studio yelling stay off my property All my intangible goodwill written off and gone All the hype and excitement that shit's definitely done. I'm still interested in this I basically have none. He says nothing. But it's OK.

I want it like this. I swear I'm having fun. I'm chasing a relief of failure. It's all I got. Oh my god. I didn't know it was going to be like this. I'm uncomfortable. Voted up.

Designing a little change. I'm glad he had to have voted up at one point. Well, it's the it up segment, yeah. I did already get paid. Damn, that's cool. That's a cool song. Very cool. Well, we loved the vote it up segment.

That was Unreasonable Rhino that made that. Unreasonable Rhino. Cool. That was good. Well, I actually was confused. I'm like, is this AI AI but I don't think it was Maybe that maybe the music was I don't know. It's hard to tell it was a little like precise and now when anything's precise I know I go shit. Is this a computer did this? I think it's a computer regardless

I the lyrics are his gotta be yeah, he wrote the lyrics. Yeah, okay He pro he prompted it, you knowrock knows that's what you're doing Anyway guys voted up the exciting segment where we visit our past problems and talk about them I got I had two and then I added another one. So I don't know. I guess we'll have three this time. Oh Okay. All right. First of all, well two of them are about things I brought in. Okay First of all from bonus episode number 27, I brought in Metazoo, the card game that scammed a generation. And now it's back!

Metazoo will now be released by GameCubator Labs. Cubator? Yeah, well the way they spelled it, Cubator, I'm like, well that makes me think of like a QAnon guy masturbating. Yeah, Cubator. You Cubatin'? Get outta here, Dad, I'm Cubatin'. If I saw a guy with the fuckin' username Cubator, I would not think, oh he must make-

Oh yeah, then what's the company gonna do then? Oh yeah, then it's taking down the Rothschilds. Oh yeah, the turf's on purpose actually. Yeah. Trigger a lower rate of death. I'm gonna say Gamecubator Labs is not a good name for a company at all But they went with it so game cubator. Oh Like incubator. Yeah, that was the job. It doesn't work

Should have said it out loud should have pulled a random person a. Should have asked a teenage boy what this sounds like. Well I told you what happened with my card game company where we made that Star Realms game. Asser Aper? Well, I mean we've had a couple cultural problems that we've had to get through. But one of them was they went, well we just love Lord of the Rings. And I'm like, oh everybody loves Lord of the Rings. So we want a name for our company that really evokes the Lord of the Rings. And said in our favorite character, we love Gandalf. We're gonna call it white wizard games

and then Every time we went hi The white wizard of course used to be gray Yeah, perhaps you've heard of them for For some reason, the one out of ten times when we told people the name of our company, they'd go like, are you guys like with the KKK or something? White wizard. What do you mean he's the white wizard? That's the Imperial wizard. We're the white wizard. Yeah, it's all white, all wizards. From the Imperium. All the time. Totally different. It's where the Imperium wizards. So they did end up at some point changing the name of the company

I was not involved in that decision. We are now wise wizard games to the numb diggers the numb Direction with it. Anyway wise wizard games is killing it as is game Q Bader labs headed up by CEO Rick Aaron's a former executive VP at Wizards of the Coast. Excitingly, GameCubeBeta Labs' lead game designer is Mr. Richard Garfield, also known as the creator of Magic the Gathering. But he's done like a million games and 90% of them fail. The new base set consists- You're better than him?

What is that attitude for? No, I'm just saying, I've seen so many card games come along and go, how could we fail? We've got Richard Garfield. And I go, well, I mean it could be like Soul Forge. Sammy Sosa strikes out all the time. It could be like Key Forge. It could be like every other game you made that, you know. King of Tokyo did well. Anyway, the new base set consists of over 200 cards featuring fans favorite cryptid creatures. Oh, they redid it? Yeah, well that's honestly, it it's kind of I'm looking at the new cards and I go well the reason people bought the old cards was because they had that really shitty almost like outsider art appeal to them like yeah just a dude drew them and I think that's what people liked

about it. Now it just kind of looks like anything like any fucking card game it looks like polished and clean and I'm like I don't think that's why those guys were buying it so I think you've kind of turned like any fucking card game. It looks like polished and clean. And I'm like, I don't think that's why those guys were buying it. So I think you've kind of turned off all fan bases there. I don't know. Anyway, Metazoo's back for all you guys looking to invest now. Remember, of course, the first edition booster boxes

were going for like thousands. Rudy from Alpha Investments was killing it. Now he deleted all his Metazoo videos. He refused to admit that it exists anymore. I like Rudy. I like Rudy's mouth investments. He's a YouTube finance magic guy. But he was really- Finance?

Like magic finance. Well, no, today I was watching him just tell everybody to buy stocks. So I don't know what he's- Oh, he's a genius. He's a genius. He's saying, you see this dip, you gotta buy it. I'm like, okay, Rudy, thanks buddy. Wait a minute. Thanks, Rudy, you see this dip, you gotta buy it. I'm like, okay Rudy, thanks buddy.

Wait a minute! Thanks Rudy. And how do I do that? I do like Rudy from Alpha Investments. Yeah, okay. I signed up for his Patreon. I'm getting fleeced. How much is his Patreon? I don't know. I think it's like 20 bucks, 25 bucks a month or something.

What do you get? You get, you get to buy stuff from him. Ah, that sounds like your dream Well cuz again, it's hard to get product for like card you get to buy magic You get to theoretically buy stuff from him at close to cost I don't know well how he sells access to get close to cost stuff. Yes. It's smart He has a lot of patrons and he has a if you unsubscribe from the patreon you're never allowed to join it again He's like you're either here for life or you can never come back. Oh, yeah, I'm sure I know master cards position on that

Yeah, I'm sure I know MasterCard's position on that. Look, I'm not blowing up his spot. But he's like, if you don't understand the incredible bargains you're having as part of the Alpha investment community, I don't want you back. You opportunists who are just here for the cheap Pokemon cards. And I'm banned. Amazing. I'm banned for a couple words.

It has been pretty fun to be getting like Patreon emails from him or he's like if you don't buy this why Schwartz? I don't know what's gonna happen. I'm like I guess I should buy some why Schwartz or the bunny gets it Yeah, okay, anyway, Metazoo's back Rudy's not talking about it for some reason who knows what's gonna happen another veto problem from bonus episode 31 guys I brought up this was the biggest problem in 2024 the discontinuation of the cheesy street chalupas we were all dying we all said Taco Bell how could you get rid of the cheesy street chalupas well guys on March 27th Taco Bell has introduced two new promotional items their caliente cantina chicken nacho fries that's a mouthful and drum roll the

toasted cheddar street chalupas great the street chalupas have been brought back but now have a delightful crust of cheddar on the outside which I actually think makes them worse I tried them again I said these aren't as good as they used to be that shit I don't normally Sometimes you want a shit. You know what actually I've been Now that you can like order online you can fuck around you know Yeah, okay Well I'm saying is like you never want to pull up to the drive-thru and be like an African American gentleman and be like can I get Double onions no tomatoes whatever else, but now on the app honk and they come out and stab you

Yeah, well you're sitting in a guy's chair black guys online go really it's everybody's fault. Anybody could have done that. You wouldn't even be the aggressor. I've realized now you can go into the app you can like change the ingredients or whatever. Okay Putting potatoes on like a burrito is pretty good Cuz that talk you know that taco bell beef kind of sucks? Yeah, cause it's like a sawdust. It's yeah, it's like trash. It has like, it has sawdust binder.

It has oat binder. Okay. There's oats in there. Not a hundred percent sawdust. Oh, you gotta make it sticky. You gotta put a little bit of oatmeal in there, I guess. But you can just replace the beef with potatoes and it's like a potato taco.

Yeah, okay. It's good. Do you put a little chef's hat on when you're ordering your- Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da Problem I wanted to bring up from episode 96 This was the problem of trivial cheating which was dick talking about people cheating at trivia But I think would also appeal apply to those who would cheat at something as stupid as video games speedrunning well Unfortunately, I made a big mistake coming on to the show good friend Carl. Joost. I wonder if they played any stuff from our show Thankfully, I don't think we were introduced in court.

Professional YouTuber in Queensland has been ordered to pay $350,000 plus interests and costs to the former world record-score holder for Donkey Kong. After the Brisbane District Court found that Carl Jobst defamed Billy Mitchell recklessly. Judge Ken Barlow found Jobs had made five defamatory imputations about Mitchell, including the idea that Mitchell had required Apollo Legend, another YouTuber, to pay him a large sum of money and implying in essence he hounded Apollo Legend to death. That's what a lot of people are talking about. Judge Ken Barlow found Mitchell did have an existing reputation as a cheat and for suing people who alleged

he was a cheat and even found that Mitchell had expressed joy after finding out Apollo legend may have died. So the judge- Was he not happy about that? Apparently the judge- He's not allowed to say, I mean, I guess in Australia No, the judge, Billy Mitchell said that he was happy. Yeah.

He's like, oh, I'm happy that guy died or whatever, which would have obviously impacted his reputation anyway. Wait a minute. Who's... Billy Mitchell is the cheating guy. It's so confusing because all the stuff that's saying here, I'm pretty sure you could do that. I was pretty sure you could do all that in America.

Like, yeah, that guy sued that guy, and that's why he killed himself. I think if this case was in America, Karl Jobst would have done very well. Obviously, Billy Mitchell is an American, so you obviously sought to sue him in Australian court because you probably thought it would be easier. You can't be talking like that if you're not in America. Dude, it's crazy. Really, you can't. I say anything.

Crazy stuff. They say in in Britain the because you know here the burden of proof for defamation is on Plaintiff the plaintiff and if they're famous they're fucked you can't you can't sue anybody for shit, but but in other countries It's that they have to prove that I don't know the best way to put it. I'm getting all mixed up Regardless the problem with this. I I know! Well, it is all messy. It is. Here's the... Something can come out of nowhere and take your house. The big thing people are focusing on is the idea that at one point, Carl Jopes put out

a video that basically implied Billy Mitchell, who is a video game cheater. There's another YouTuber named Apollo Legend who said, here's how Billy Mitchell cheated. Billy Mitchell... And he killed himself. Well, Billy Mitchell, I think, implied that he was going to sue him and they had to come to some sort of private agreement that may have involved money. And then Apollo Legend, who did kill himself, Carl Jobs said, well, he probably killed himself because Billy Mitchell used his financial muscle to try to bankrupt him. I don't know, man.

The way I heard it, he was pretty explicit. He's like, yeah, they reached a big settlement and that's why he killed himself. And then he killed himself. I don't know. I don't care. So it didn't happen? Who gives a shit? Well, the big thing is? I don't know. I don't care. So it didn't happen? Who gives a shit?

Well, the big thing is, let's be clear, when you think of Billy Mitchell and the reason you hate him or whatever. Cheating at Donkey Kong. Do you go, oh, it's because he killed Apollo Legend. Nobody thinks that. No. Like, Billy Mitchell's reputation, you have to prove that his reputation. The cheating is worse.

The cheating is infinitely worse. Way worse than killing a guy. And that's why- Or making him kill himself. I don't care. Well, that's why the judgment doesn't make sense is Billy Mitchell goes Well, I've lost all these opportunities because of my bad reputation because Carl said I killed that guy Yeah, dude your reputation was already shit like you would have lost those opportunities regardless you cheated Steve Weeby You cheated Weeby! You cheated fucking Weeby out of the record right there! You put it on me!

You and your little fucking gremlin friend! You can't blame Donkey Kong on me! That little pimp that you have working in there that little golem motherfucker There's a there's a couple dead that guy which which one that guy that put the tape in the shirt Yeah, the ref. I think the ref so the ref I think I hope you're bad or but he got kind of rope adoped by Billy There was that they did find out one of the guys who was putting in all the scores Yeah, you know like one of the guys working at Twin Galaxies. Huge pedophile. What? Wait a minute.

The guy that was working at a video game high score place was a pedophile? Wait a minute. Diddling the shit out of kids and downloading terabytes of child pornography. He was putting in any records for downloading child pornography? I think he did also have his own record. I don't know if he got it.

Drop him anywhere in the globe. He could find child porn in 10 minutes. Okay. So, a lot of the records that were entered. How board that way? Well, not only are these records a little suspect. See these tracks, there was a struggle. I'm not saying that, you know.

There's a phosphor in there against the wall of a camera, a Polaroid, cause they don't want to digitize, cause the FBI can track that. I'm just saying that organization has had a lot of problems. OK? Yeah. Twin galaxies has kind of been a, I don't think twin,

I think they're still going, but they should just stop. Somebody else should be doing that. Anyway, Carl Jobs is out of a house. Carl Jobs is out probably like half, I mean, I don't know how much he spent on lawyers. He's got to pay the cost for whatever. It might be as much as a million dollars he's got to pay. He thought he was going to win too.

That's the worst, man. You look bad when you think you're gonna win. That's why everyone hates him. They're like, oh, I feel embarrassed. I thought he was gonna win too. Again, if he wasn't in Australia, I think he would've won, cause you just would say-

Yeah, you can say that shit. They had a settlement and it was for a crazy amount of money and that's why he killed himself. That's not true. Well, you know, that's what I heard. That's what I heard. That's what I read on Reddit somewhere. It is true that he heard that from someone else.

Except for Alex Jones. Everybody except for Alex Jones can do that. Right. Seriously. Well, yeah, it's true. Alex Jones was the only guy who got nailed for it in that state. What is going on with Infowars? I don't even know. They won. The onion got fucked. The onion tried to buy him being cute and the judge said, No, fuck you. You're not funny. Who owns them then? Alex Jones?

Yeah. Okay. Israel bought it for him I gotta talk to hair it hair. He never talks about them. I'm gonna get Harrison Smith on here He'd come on so we can talk over him. Yeah Okay, look next time we have a guest I will just shut the fuck up and I'll stop being funny Little joke about did Nick Riketa getting I fucked your wife t-shirt cuz well you really Really ruined the show oh

Okay, is that it and play the fucking song? Fifty pages are lettered the color is finishing the last 10 pages now all right so once you're gonna be out In what form ah readable for people to have before the other gonna be in my hands is the order Oh, and that it like so my eyeballs my eyes as an order. Let me see if I can rush print What about it for my eyes? I think I'm digitally before Before the end of the month you said that last month yeah Now we're like right there man, it's right there I

Know it's been right there for Just like this guy saying look I got a colorist she's got a sick kid I don't want to go into it he can't color he's a sick kid I don't know man I try to color if I just see my sick kid oh everything's coming out measles there was some sort of hard drive crap like I had a hard drive crash she says she had a hard drive crash just every this little oh she There that yeah, the colorist is a lady. She's doing very good. I see she said a couple pages got you corrupted She has to redo them. I don't fuck corrupted. What is this?

I don't know it might be it might be one of those things where it's like oh, you know my Corrupted I can't believe corrupted. I can't believe it. My jazz drive got wiped. I can't believe it. I'm like, all right, great. Corrupt my, I didn't defrag my zip drive correctly. Regardless, I showed off some previews on my stream the other night. If you come by my stream tonight, maybe we'll look at some more previews.

OK. We have Eric Weathers lettering. The famous world renowned letterer of such comics as ISOM number one is here and he's lettering my comic. He's doing a great job. The ISOM letterer? ISOM letterer has come aboard Shonen Revolver Industries and I'm hoping this will be a long term.

Really? He does good work. Did you make him write a letter to you inside the comic? I think he also lettered a cyber frog. So he's got his hand in multiple pots. He's done good stuff, too He's done good. You've seen cyber frog and cyber frogs lettering is very good every page I was like these fucking letters makes it so easy for me to read Well, yes cyber frog has those cool little boxes when cyber frog talks They're in like a weird like a little I highlight the letters that I especially like I'm like

Oh, he's fucking amazing. Look you gotta have a good letter F Cyberfrog talks they're in like a weird like a little I highlight the letters that I especially like I'm like Look you gotta have a good letterer Kerning on this this period you know we have had discussions about kerning I had him send me three different samples of different kerning sizes good so I could make sure His kerning was a little too tight. I thought so I had him. I had him redo the page You're like my fans can't read that. They're too busy gooning and jacking off They can't focus on this tight-ass kerning that you got. I'm a guy and fonts are very important to me Okay, and I was like, let's just make sure we get the kerning just right. Okay. My problem is the 1% Here's a nice quote for you today stock market had a tiny correction tiny correction. It's not a big deal

Tiny I think I said this is the biggest back-to-back drop the S&P has ever seen across two days Who gets a shit me we have the? most tone death Feeling in February when all my stocks are up. I was feeling down. I said you gotta stop jay trading cuz it's So good. Yeah, and I'm now down about $80,000 From February I was so happy Man I just love the stock market. I love how it's going up

And all that super color money is gone. Wow, that's rough. Super killer two is gonna really have to do well. That's alright. I'm still up. I'm still up. No amount of job creation can make up for the trillions of dollars of value destroyed this week. This is a professor. Yeah. Here's another one. I've never seen so much value Destroyed deliberately. This is the worst leadership ever Andrew Yang said said that isn't that was it? What are you talking about? What value? This is numbers and all man numbers on the screen. There's a different universe where Yang was president. Everything was great Where's all that free money coming from though? What friend money all? All that UBI, that yang bucks, all that shit.

Comes from a shutting down existing, well, a dog, kind of dog type shit. Oh, that's a lot of money you guys are gonna pull out. If you were already getting government entitlements, you don't get extra under UBI. Have you met black people? I have met black people. That's not gonna fly.

That's not gonna fly. We'd also hopefully get people out of the presence of like you guys great. Nike just lost nearly ten billion dollars in under an hour because Trump slapped a 46% tariff on Vietnam. The stock crated. How have we done enough to Vietnam guys? This isn't America first. That's tanking American companies while pretending its patriotism Man I got stocks. Yeah, I don't what the fuck these guys are crying about it goes back up You just don't sell idea that like you know being doing any kind of protecting American workers who need jobs who don't need like numbers in their computer screen going up,

is so offensive to them that they can't even imagine it for two days. Okay, so- You know, for two days! Value destruction! It's a fucking number on your bank account, on your stock account, bro! It's no value there! Well, there is value depending on, if you were planning to retire in the next few years It's not good to see it thousands of dollars wiped off your retirement account Go back if you're planning to retire in a few years. You don't need rent every month

You don't liquidate your whole portfolio. That's not good retirement planning veto. Okay, so Fun, so because it goes back up do whatever, just zero it out one night. Who cares? I think you guys can take a little dip. You've had two or four years of double digit gains and you fucking cry. Obviously, obviously we can take a little dip. Everybody can take a little dip. Uh huh. But when a dip comes along, it should be for a good reason.

Like oh hey, the globe is being plunged into a health crisis that the stock market is dipping the there's an uncertain economic future yeah Trump is saying I'm going to put in tariffs and I don't know why to get money to get money from other people people. Okay. Other countries. So my hope... American manufacturing competitive. There you go. Boom. American manufacturing needs to be competitive. Yeah. So what's your... You know all that minimum wage raising that you guys did? Yeah. Guess what that did with compared to other countries where they got no... they got snow minimum wage. Uh-oh. Expensive to make shit over here. It is expensive to make shit over here. All those entitlements for Mexicans, for illegal Mexicans, all got no minimum wage. Uh oh. Expensive to make shit over here.

It is expensive to make shit over here. All those entitlements for Mexicans, for illegal Mexicans, all that free healthcare and stuff. All the Obama phones. That shit's expensive. So you're, but. We don't got no Obama phones in Vietnam. You agree with Trump that we need

more American manufacturing. Yeah, toasters. Let's make some toasters here. Okay, shut the fuck, see this is what. What are you talking about? What do you mean we make some toasters here? You're like- you're one of these 1% motherfuckers. What do you need to be made here?

All of it. All of it. I would like to pretend that no other country but America exists. Woop. Wipe it out. Nuke em. So, first of all, the unemployment rate was at what? Like 3.4%.

It was like- I don't believe those numbers. Dramatically decreasing under Biden ever the unemployment rate was fine This idea that like nobody has a job is kind of silly Honestly now you can get down into the like minutiae. Yeah, everyone's driving uber. It's great It's a great fucking world that we have everyone's putting little plastic toys from China in a box at an Amazon fulfillment center or Everyone's putting little plastic toys from China in a box at an Amazon fulfillment center or driving their own car to deliver them

House by house that fucking sucks. That's not a country, bro. That's a fulfillment service for China. That's not a country But everybody working in a factory to make toasters is a country Yes, make the fucking shit here that you're selling and buying here I would rather drive an uber car than sit in a factory and make a fucking toaster, I think. At least an Uber car. You can do that. You can play music, you can drive around. That sounds honestly like a better job, assuming it pays competitively. You know people need jobs, right? I know that some people are out of work, I agree.

But people need jobs, you know that. First of all, learn to code. Good jobs. We all know this. That's what your AI shit's taking over, people need jobs, you know that? First of all, learn to code, we all know this. That's what your AI shit's taking over though, what are you talking about? Well that is kind of the point, right? I don't understand how we're moving into a digital future where AI can automate so much of this shit

and we're going, well clearly what needs to happen as these new technologies emerge is we gotta get guys making toasters in a factory. That's the only possible thing we can think of for them to do. There's no other job for them. No, there's not. They gotta make, we're buying the toasters, make them here. All that shit that you want, all the UBI, all the entitlements, all this, all this labor protection shit, we gotta make it here. Okay, look, let me say, let me say I agree with the idea that it would be nice to have more manufacturing in America, and I can get behind that sure

It would be nice if it was possible. You're one of these established billionaire. Well when I lose $80,000 in a month I don't feel good about it dick. It's not great. You think it goes up forever What are you thinking? I think you could give me a little warning I know I pulled a lot out before, trust me, could have been way worse. Could have been way worse. It's bad, could have been way worse. It's just about your money. Of course it's about my money, why would it not be about my money? Ahhhh.

Okay, look. Let's say I agree with this idea that it would be nice to have more manufacturing states side, I agree with that, sure. And I could see America being a specialty manufacturer, making high-end goods. Tessus. Not crummy tessus. I think we should make nice things. It would be nice if we had a reputation

for quality American manufacturing. It's better than whatever. Even though China's making pretty good stuff, I have to say. Is this American manufacturing? That is American manufacturing. They're made in-house. See, I have to say. Is this American manufacturing? That is American manufacturing. They're made in-house. See, you could make this.

You'd be happy at a toy store making this all day. Well, it's got jars probably made in Vietnam, and I'm sure all the LEGO pieces are part of Denmark. But, oh, no, wait, there is a LEGO factory in Connecticut, I think. OK. Couldn't you slowly implement small tariffs across the board to gently ease all these businesses

that rely on foreign manufacturing to tell them, we really want to encourage you to producing stateside. So we're gonna slowly ramp up these tariffs. Now, cause they'll find a way around it. You gotta hit them hard and hit them over the head with it to make them panic. So they'll freak out and start building up old factories. So now I'm seeing all these small businesses going,

hey, remember that thing we were gonna make? We're not making it anymore. Because it's stupid. That Kickstarter, we gotta cancel it. So it's working. All this shit we don't need is getting canceled. We don't need a lot of things. We don't need Kickstarter. There's a lot of things we don't need is getting cancelled! We don't need a lot of things. We don't need Kickstarter.

There's a lot of things we don't need. Yeah. Okay? But these are still businesses that people run to generate money for people who want to buy their products. I'm tired of this argument. Okay, quartering. You don't need video games.

You don't need movies. No, you do. You do. Make them here. Easy. Done. Okay, but we do make them here. Just because part of them are manufactured abroad using No. resources available in other countries. Plastic. Get the hell out of here. And labor.

Cheap labor. Nothing wrong with that. Well, who voted out all the cheap labor in America? I hate to say it, but I think the average American at this point, if we tried to pay them, poverty, look, we have unions. What are you going to do? You can't get rid of them. You can try and bust them as much as you want. Yeah, you got to go to Vietnam. That shit's illegal.

Do you see that problem there? You can't have nice things here and then have all the manufacturing down where there's no nice things. I think that- Do you see the problem with that? Like morally, you don't say hey everybody We're not gonna we're not gonna beat kids into making things cuz that sucks But we're gonna buy it from those guys who do look you see a problem with that America won the race

What do you want? All right tears? This is how you catch up. We had child labor We had fucking kids in the sweatshops making the shoes. It sucked. It's a period of shit. You get through it. What's something that you could morally understand like that that you don't think we should have? If it was white kids in the factories, that I might be upset. Okay, what if there's white kids in the factories in Vietnam? That I would wanna shut down.

Little Vietnamese kids. Well, they're Asians, so, you know. So they like it. Yeah, they like putting stuff together. They like putting stuff together. They like making stuff. Sorry, well, that's my it. They like putting stuff together. They like putting stuff together. They like making stuff. All right, well that's my problem. Yeah, it's awesome.

It's so cool that like, you know, that card game company I'm a part of, they're not gonna be able to make shit. I got a bunch of stuff. You can make a little piece of paper here. Held up in China that's gonna get fucked over now. Shit made in here. That's too bad.

Cause it got a lot, luckily, my trading cards thankfully got lost on a boat and they weren't, they didn't print them quick enough. So now they're gonna cost an extra 40% so that's cool. Here's my hope and I hope it's what you're also hoping is that Trump is fucking around a little bit. Well he already said with Vietnam he's trying to make deals. Yeah deals. I don't think we're gonna that's I don't think these tariff rates are gonna stay where they are. It'd be great if they did no it wouldn't it's bad

What's wrong with people having jobs what? Are you hate jobs so much there are ways to create jobs without fucking saying hey business first of all yeah Yeah, you guys had plenty of time to show us to the night You did you see the 900 guys got fired from Stellantis today? I don't care about them. Oh, yeah, okay It's all about job is what is that an asshole factory or something? I believe they I believe it's chips Computer chip computer chips and they said we don't know what's going on So we're just gonna temporarily fire it's the 900 people not pay them because we don't know what's going on with the tariffs

Okay, okay, so all you guys are like, oh, it's about jobs. Oh, yeah, I'm sure semiconductor chips So that's real tumultuous time for them Right so you care about jobs, but then there's companies that rely on foreign manufacturing and obviously have plenty of employees So what is you're gonna offset all of that by building a couple fucking factories to make toasters? Yeah? Do y'all know all Foxcom? Set up that manufacturer. I don't know but you better if's too long, you better fucking accelerate that shit and figure it out. Okay. I don't, we're at the point of, I don't give a fuck. Just do it.

Well, if Trump comes in and he does get rid of all building regulations and whatever else, it says you can just build a factory. Just build it. You can either die of starvation or build it. Guess you got a good choice. You can either go to prison or die. You don't care about these tariffs at all. You're such a fucking retard. I do. It's great. It's just because Trump's doing anything.

I'm so sick. I'm so sick of the high and mighty liberals thinking they're doing so much good for people here while just shipping all the evil out and saying, well, yeah, you know, it's fine that we're doing it to Asian people, fuck them, but over here we need like, you need, we gotta have new Obama phones for everybody and new sneakers. So you're saying that the liberals are very America first is what I'm hearing. No, because it doesn't last.

That shit doesn't last. What are you talking about? It doesn't last. It doesn't need to last. Everybody's broke. Everybody's not broke. Everyone is dead broke. That's retarded. I! Everyone is not broke. Everyone is dead broke. That's retarded. I know that's not true.

You are dead broke. What are you talking about? I'm not dead broke! I'm doing fine! I make money making a fucking internet podcast. Everybody's broke. Now look, the super killer money is running out so you're gonna need a cash infusion soon but other than that... Don't you see people out there? They need money.

They're fucked. Gen Z. They're they need money. They're they're they're fucked Gen Z They're fucked on job. I know and you know shit You know what's been really cool about having a small business that is able to produce things abroad I've been able to give work to my friends and pay them money gig shit. Yeah. Yeah, that's not life That's not it. Maybe I could scale it up. I would love to have these people's employees I would love to have full-time artists and whatever the fuck else. Wouldn't it be great when Trump protects your your business from getting undercut by... Wow. Foreign slave labor. Undercut! How would I be undercut? In what way?

Because you can pay those guys less. There's a veto in Vietnam, exactly like you. Make it, make it a super-herer. Yeah, make him super-herer. He could undercut you. He only makes you wait two and a half years instead of three years. That's good. That's good. Anyway, that's my problem Well, you're one of these billionaire guys. I'm so glad that I'm seeing all these cool little small businesses going Oh, sorry, we can't afford to make things. You're talking about like card game shit Long box toys had a what do you call it? It was gonna be long box heroes. long box heroes we're gonna get it that's not the country though the country's like

you're like drivers manufacturing stuff like that millions of people so like a okay the guy who's fucking Donald Trump's little buddy is making AI driving cars you know how many jobs are gonna lose when that happens why's it shut that down we What do you mean, shut down AI? What if we're so desperate to protect jobs? Yeah, tax AI guys big time. Tax them and make all the scanning that they're doing, all the data gathering stuff, make that illegal, big time, unless they're doing it off somebody they have rights to.

All the open AI shit, find them billions of dollars. Well, it would be interesting if he did that, but he won't, because I sure he would piss off Elon Musk. Everything he does. No, it's because- No, Elon owns Twitter. He can do whatever he wants. He owns that content. It's true. He can scan Twitter. There you go. I meant the self-driving cars should be taxed. Yeah, tax that shit. All the taxi drivers. You can't have the taxi medallions worth nothing in New York now. Well... They should get those jobs back. It's so shitty what they're doing. You keep changing what it is! I don't understand.

It's not what it is! We need jobs here! We can't be shipping all the jobs of fucking China! What job is being sh- Oh, the manufacturing veto! There's like a million people just making iPhones and Apple shit in China! That should all be made here! So you wanna reopen the factories in Detroit and build all the cars here in a case Lee and shitily got it I want I want young urban males of you want the guys living in Detroit making my one thing Yes, I want them to be too tired after work to listen to their cell phone on speakerphone on the bus. Is that too much to ask?

You know that will fix a lot of problems. Get your ass to work! Get to the factory! I think it will introduce a lot of more problems when I'm driving my Ford around and a fucking crack pipe falls out and shatters my tires. See this is why you don't do it slow because you guys won't, you don't understand it all. You gotta hit, you gotta hit them over the head with this shit. We can do whatever we want. It's America. We can do whatever the fuck we want. Why not implement a plan? You say, hey, we're the government.

If you want to build a factory, we're going to subsidize it to this tune. Oh, more money! Oh! Nah, just tax them. Tear the shit out of them. Okay. Ah, fuck you guys. Destroy a bunch of businesses along the way. Who cares? A bunch of kickstarting shit. All sorts of businesses are going to suffer from this.

You don't need a job, so you don't care. None of these motherfuckers here... I care! ...do need a job. I have... You don't want to work. That's why. People want to work, and they can't need a job so you don't care. None of these motherfuckers here do need a job. You don't want to work. That's why. People want to work and they can't get a job. That's why it matters to them. That's why this matters to them. Look, I understand...

The 1%. You. That's you. The 1%. Here's the problem is, at a certain point, we need to reach some sort of status quo in regards to how you achieve success in America. A job. Okay. Getting a job. Right. Buying a house. Wow you can't do that anytime soon. Why do you think that is? How the fuck are you crying about the stock? How the fuck do you think houses are gonna go down without the stock market going down? You're right, I'm very excited about that so I hopefully will take advantage of that but But it's not that.

Again, it is disturbing to me where I go, well, a lot of these big companies, when you go, well, they can shoulder the cost. Yes, they can shoulder the cost. But then you look. No, it should destroy them. That'd be even better. I don't think it will.

I don't think you think Nike is going to be destroyed. No, it'll hurt their pocketbooks. Smaller companies can. I'm saying big companies can weather the storm. I think you're gonna see all these small, let's be clear, what has been exciting is you've seen brands pop up where a guy goes, I'm gonna make sneakers.

You know, what do you mean? You're not Nike. Name one. Sneakers, like small, I don't know the names of the brands, but you see all these like. Smodgens? Well, what are the fucking- Infinity shoes?

Yeah, infinity shoes. Hence the good product. One of the ones I keep getting sold, a back butt, no not back butt, shoes. Your shoes? Fucking sliders? I keep getting, well ever since I did the show, obviously my phone's listening to me,

because it's trying to get me to buy whatever those slippers were that people were telling me to buy. Shoes that don't come off, why don't you get those? Sure, but you're seeing a lot of like small, niche brands open up because Yeah Really at this point anybody can start a business and manufacture a product

because we have all these manufacturing partners and it is affordable You mean slave labor? We have slave labor Manufacturing partners you mean guys who will take a little cane and beat kids into making shoes If Chinese people are dissatisfied with their lot in life, you know what? Rise up. Rise up and kill them. So we can send everything to Africa to get made there. Make some noise. How's that?

Do you understand how fucked your position is? What? That we need people being beaten and worked for 12 hours a day. All I hear, I saw Chinese people hanging out with I Show Speed and they were having the best time of their life. Giving them cotton and he starts picking it right away. Giving them cotton and he was showing them their skyscrapers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're all investing in useless real estate.

I don't know. I think he might be stupid enough to do it for free, but I'm sure they paid for his trip. He's making Vuku bucks on that. You think the Chinese government paid him to come over and love China? He's like Hanoi Jane, that fucking asshole. He really is.

Taking a tour of China right now? Fuck I Show Speed, that cocksucker. He's like Hanoi Jane, that fucking asshole. He really is. Taking a tour of China right now? Fuck I Show Speed. That cocksucker. Yeah. He should be tried for treason and hang. It is kind of bizarre how many people are like retweeting it. Like, look at how much fun he's having in China.

I'm like, this is like the most blatant communist propaganda I've ever seen in my life. This is the worst fucking thing ever, dude. Right now. Oh, wow. This is like taking a tour of a POW camp and being like, look at how much fun they're having. These guys are great. Look at their buildings. Dude, all the Twitter posts I'm seeing of like, look at how great China's buildings are.

I thought America was cool. I'm like, what? I thought they lived on big piles of shit like in Jurassic Park. When she reaches into the diarrhea. It's like some North Korea levels of propaganda, this iShowSpeed shit. He's a fucking idiot. Wow, the TikTok generation is so retarded that they're actually falling for it. Which has been fascinating.

Yes, I have enjoyed the fruits of Chinese slave labor. Yeah, but American laborers, you're creative, so you can benefit from that, but people who aren't creative can't. So they deserve to be protected. I agree. I guess that makes sense. There are a lot of uncreative people who can't. Good thing Trump's gonna do it for them. Oh, they can just make TikTok videos. Oh wait I guess that makes sense. There are a lot of uncreative people who can't good thing Trump's gonna do it for him. Oh, they can just make tik-tok videos. Oh wait that takes creativity Just flip just flip shit. Just flip magic cards. Anybody can do that. All right I already played my sound effect like Blake's breaks. You can just scam people on whatnot. Okay. Anyway, the 1% don't be like veto

Yeah, don't be like me you one percenter. That's my net worth is probably one twentieth of years. Let's see here. Dick! That's because I know the common man. Because that's who I am. Because I'm so desperate to regain my losses from Daddy Trump decimating the market for no reason. It's gonna go down more. Eh, well, you gotta buy the dip a little at a time, right? I don't know what you're telling me. We'll see. I think he's fucking around. Well, you gotta buy the dip a little at a time, right?

I don't know, you tell me. All right, we'll see. I think he's fucking around, because the thing I was gonna say with Vietnam is, he already went to Vietnam, and he's like, oh, I'm talking to the president, maybe we can get those tariffs down to 0%. Yeah. I think he's just strong-arming everyone

into giving him some big trade deal, and then he'll go, I can relax the tariffs a little bit. Gonna be a little sticker shock at first. Anyway, that's what I hope. The other thing I hope is that I can get all this trash out of my house and Part of the trash I have is a stack of Dreamcasts that don't work I told the Dreamcast not working story yet I don't think so remember that so you remember I bought my buddies he had all these video games and his game story

He had to move him so I bought his whole back. Yeah, I remember that Yeah, and is rotting away for the past 10 years in various storage units. Capacitors exploding, melting, evaporating. Well, hold on, hold on. These Dreamcasts, let's be clear. First of all, my laziness has benefited wildly because I kept holding all that shit through COVID

when the prices and all that shit skyrocketed. So it actually ended up working out. Your hoard is more valuable. My hoard is more valuable. It has appreciated. So all these Dreamcast, which I think were worth like 50 bucks are now selling for like 100 and 120. And I went, Oh my God, well, I don't want to throw these ones out that don't work. The reason they don't work is because when my buddy had this game store, he would let people, if they wanted to play video games, they had a TV in there. They could go in the back room, grab a console, plug it in and fuck around. So some kids were like, man, we should play House of the Dead,

that classic light gun game. Yeah, it's really fun. He had the light guns back there. So they said, well, let's grab a Dreamcast off the shelf, plug it in, and then we'll plug in the light guns and we'll play House of the Dead. So they boot up House of the Dead and they're like, ah, fucking light gun doesn't work, man. What the fuck? And they're like, ah, this Dreamcast is fucked up. So they put it in the bag and they grab another Dreamcast and they plug it in and they go, light gun's not, this Dreamcast's fucked up too.

It's not working with the light gun. They do that with like eight Dreamcasts. And then they go to my buddy and they go, you know all those Dreamcasts you got back there, they don't work. And he goes, what do you mean they don't work? And he goes, well, I kept plugging in this light gun and then it wouldn know those dreamcasts you got back there. They don't work He goes what do you mean they don't work? He goes well I kept plugging in this light gun and then it wouldn't they wouldn't let me shoot the guys on the screen He goes you ever think that there was something wrong that with the light gun is like what do you mean?

He goes do you ever think you were shorting out the controller boards on eight? Perfectly good dreamcasts that I tested and put back there and they're like It was like a popping noise and a hissing every time we plugged the fucking thing in. Yeah. So these fucking kids burnt through like $1,000 of Dreamcast in an afternoon, just plugging a faulty light gun into it, shorting the controller board and they go,

oh, let's try another one. So he carried these things around? He, well, he kept them back there because he was like, well, there's gotta be a way to fix them. Unfortunately, back then, you know, it wasn't like- Back then the technology hadn't been invented. Well, honestly, them back there because he was like well, there's got to be a way to fix them. Unfortunately back then You know it wasn't like in the technology hadn't been well honestly It wasn't like now where I can go to like online and go How do I fix a Dreamcast controller board and there's a Chinese guy again?

Selling a $5 kit of every capacitor and fuse that goes on the controller board Uh-huh, okay back then you had to like figure out what the fuck you needed now And now you can even upgrade it with a you know normally it had a battery that had to be soldered in there now you can have a replaceable battery So if the battery charges out you just pop another one in sure okay, so I bought a bunch of these Dreamcast Fixing kits how much is one of these go for that you are fixing a Dreamcast if I get it working With a control like two controllers in the game like a twenty. Okay. How long do you spend fixing it? Well, I think the point was to try and get it down to a science where it doesn't take very long. Less than an hour.

For eight? Takes you one hour each? It'd probably take now, I could do it in about a half hour. Okay. Wow, alright. Because really there's only like two things. There's really only one thing on the board that has to be replaced, but I replaced that thing and the battery. The problem is that soldering sucks, and my problem is soldering. And I hate it, and I'm not good at it, and all the guys on the YouTube... I hate watching them do it.

I'm like, you fucking asshole. And they pretend like it's easy. When I see somebody with a really hot girlfriend, I have the same feeling when I see somebody solder and they're like they use that They use the soldering wick thing and it goes right on like you you fuck maybe my problem is YouTube solder guys Making it look like it's these and they go well It might have a bit of a learning curve once you figure out how to apply the flux and I'm like every time flux Fuck you

Why am I fuck to your ass anytime? I try to solder anything, I'm always like, it's gonna be easy. Just like the guy on YouTube showed me. He did it in two seconds. Obviously I could do that. Every single time I try to solder, it's like, okay, well, I'll just tin the solder thing. Like, uh-oh, it's not going out. It's not, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's too much. All right, just like kind of wipe it off here.

All right, still like a little ball. Okay, all right, now I'll go to the board and heat it up. Uh-oh. Uh-oh something smoking. Now I've burned the board and I've destroyed a trace. You don't touch the soldering iron, you heat the thing up and touch the other thing. Uh-oh now they're flinging off. Oh something else came off. Oh And then you get another guy who says you can do it for you I had an arcade board and the guy said yeah, I could fix that don't worry and then after three months of me being like Can I get that thing back he sent it back it was

obvious he had completely fucked it up God I had to do so many fucking soldering labs in college I put so many soldering holes in the in the carpet yeah but my first apartment didn't I made maybe one or two things and then you're like did I buy like a shitty soldering kit I definitely did because I just bought the first one on Amazon. I use expensive ones It doesn't get any easier. All I know is I burnt the shit out of my hand a bunch of times right here I have a giant blister on this finger So I guess this is also a finger pain problem and after I burnt this finger to shit, photo finger pain, you get a win there.

After I burnt up this finger, I said, okay, just don't do that again. I'll start going into a rage if I smell solder because of all the trauma. Yeah. And then I immediately burnt my other finger. Like two seconds later, I'm like, well, I just know not to touch the very hot piece of metal.

Like, ah, fucking shit, ah! I hate soldering. It's not fun. I fucking hate it. And I don't know why I think it's gonna be easy every time It's a pain in the ass There's like this one thing on the board that so the worst part is when you got to take a thing off the board And it's still just like stuck in there. Yeah, what solder is still holding this in there. All right

So I'll just use pliers and hold up the fucking resistor It should be easy. Melt it like I know that I shouldn't be using gravity to do this, but whatever I'm so done with the pliers. I had the fucking the snippers. I'm like I can't get this fucking thing off the board That's just I'm just using a red board now forever. Yeah, I'm not selling anything well two of them I fixed correctly this the third one I don't know what the fuck I did But that's the other part and now I have the multimeter and I'm like I don't even know it's got a million fucking things on the dial I gotta look up what fucking part of the multimeter doesn't want yeah, okay

But I think I every time I get a new multimeter it works differently What the hell is this? So once you put a fuse on the board? There's no way to test the fuse without taking it off the board again I mean, I don't know so now I saw to the fuse in but I think the fuse is the problem They're like well you got a D saw to the whole fuck if they use chatter the fuse in Yeah, the point of the fuse. I don't fuck it in a fuse holder so it pops the fuse out It's a what a fuck would you saw to refuse and think it's a way not a fuse What is the thing that blows if it gets too many hands? Yeah, but it's like a self repairing

What are those things? Have you seen that? Yeah, I don't know what they're called It's like a self-repairing thing that supposedly the new ones can't blow or whatever Really? Wow Yeah, I don't know, somehow they- Why do you need to test that then? I don't know! Cause it said the other ones fucking worked! Now I put up this one and the controller doesn't work

Are you sure what you put on there exists? I don't know! Well it worked on the other two the other two work So the other two I fixed and then they don't fuck it all is fucking broken because it comes from China. Yeah, well, okay Well, I'm gonna buy more from China At least I can get an American. Oh my god so much shit. I get from China I'm lucky I bought all that stuff before everything went crazy And now this lady on Alibaba isn't messaging me back and I'm worried they just stole my $2,000 So we'll see how that works. You bought two thousand dollars of what?

The trading cards the super killer trading cards Alibaba is like a purchase protection thing. So it's a lot of trading cards $2,000 worth well, it's yeah, it's one for every backer. So it's a lot of packs. They're in packs. Oh wow. Yeah I figured it's something nice for the can you play a game with it? No, can I play a game with it? You could make up a game? I thought about making them game cards, but I'm like I'm getting too creative. Yeah, I mean you only had three years Why would you it's not gonna come up with us? Okay, there's been other stuff. I've been doing just do mundane maths game. Just do mundane maths game monsters vs. Magic Here you go. Here you go and done I think I have said the one time I really

Questioned mundane math intelligence was when I saw how his game played I went. Oh man. That's a bad game You are not a game designer my friend anyway soldering sucks It's never gone well and any soldering project I complete disaster. It's a disaster I look at it and I go I could have done that better. I hate that that wick so much. I've tried to use it before and it's just always. So like the the flux or what? The finger trap looking thing. Yeah to try and get the solder off. I don't even get what it's for. Like how is it supposed to work? Yeah, it's supposed to be the copper gets the solder and it sticks to the copper, but it doesn't come back off But and now I got the solder sucker

You have one of those so you press the plunger and yeah, I've never used it I don't I don't believe I've looked at that. I think that thing doesn't work No way it was a pain in the ass. It like kind of works, but not really and then I see guys online I got like the fancy one. It's like I'm like I gotta eat the fancy solder sucker that my life better How much soldering do I really want to be doing in my fucking life? I wish that I love watching those like I fixed old Nintendo Yeah thing on YouTube. I wish it's so cool. You're like, oh man I could do all this cool stuff or guys are like HD modding their game boys

I wish they would you could watch a version where the solderings cut out. Yeah, I don't see that I feel like a like a fifth old 50s guys like let's cover these, you know One time I did customize a Gameboy Advance and I put in an HD backlit screen and even that I fucked up sounds ambitious There's a little plastic spacer to put in there So the screen fits right both the screens out you can't adjust the spacer anymore And I realized now that the spacer had a little plastic film on it that I didn't replace or it didn't take off so no when I look in you can see the little plastic film waving around and there's no way to

remove it without ripping the screen off and destroying it maybe I could remove the maybe I could jam the faceplate all right if I get another Gameboy faceplate I think I could wait today you mean you still have that yeah, yeah, I thought you're talking about when you were a kid No, no, no that was a couple years ago. Okay. I did get that solderless Gameboy Replacement though that's nice the first thing I ever soldered was a mod chip so you could play pirated games in the PlayStation ooh And I didn't tell my parents that I was doing this. Well, just would they be mad They would say don't do it cuz it's like a shot. Oh, yeah. Yeah, this was in I was still a kid. Yeah, let me get home. What year was that out?

95 94. Yeah. Well, do you know you're the mod ship came out? I had the one I had the first Model you just saw around like five things. Yeah, I was up there in my room in secret. I had the one probably I had the first model we had just sold around like five things yeah I was up there in my room in secret I had gone to circuit city don't worry about me did it work? Just playing free games up here. Did you get it working? yeah yeah yeah but I had like a smell it's like trying to hide it in the bathrooms and no one would so first of all so no one would bother me right it's like I don't know how the fuck anything I Don't know how to solder like okay. Let's read the instructions printed out on this Printed out from game effect printed out with like the rings on the side All right, yeah game. Yeah, I didn't sell much even had like a antsy drawing. Oh god. Oh god. Okay

Yeah, that that makes sense if I it's like if I saw myself doing that now What the fuck are you doing that's yeah? I still don't know what I'm doing are not good enough for what you're doing. But it worked. It worked. Yeah. And then I was like, fuck, I don't have a CD. I don't have a CD burner, so there's no point for this. No CD burner, fuck!

That was the good thing about the Dreamcast is you didn't end up needing any sort of mod chip because they just fucked up the technology, so you just burn CDs. I remember going to the flea market and just a guy was just like, yeah I got all the games. I'm like, oh shit you do have all the games. This is $5 fucking shitty Dreamcast games. I do remember the one kid in high school who was like, I'll mod your Xbox for $100.

And he was making fucking coin, dude. Everybody was getting that shit modded. I remember I soldered something successfully at Burning Man. That was the only two other things I ever soldered well because my electric I brought got those little Christmas lights, you know, yeah, I put them all over my bike Like I spent like an hour putting all these fucking Christmas lights over my bike, right and I turn it on nothing. Oh Shit, what was wrong? Very funny the battery box was busted It had rusted out. You got a what do you call it? You got a

Christmas vacation type situation going on. Yeah it was. Honey come look! I think Steve said that to me. I was like that's not funny thanks a lot. Thanks for pointing that out. I met your buddies. Had I met Steve before? I don't know. Your Burning Man buddy? Yeah have you? Is that your problem? Yeah, my problem. I met him at your wedding. Uh, he had a good time. Okay. We all had a good time. What is my... my problem? I should do my work.

Scooter parking zones? Seen these? It's a good one. I was gonna say, somebody offered to fix my arcade board that that one guy destroyed, and I should really take them up on that. Yeah. We had such a great thing, scooters. They're great. They're fun. They're they're too fun. They're really fun too fast Yeah The only good thing about going to downtown LA is scooting through skid Row and looking all the homeless guys going

I Can't catch me dude! You're too high to understand where I'm going! Crackheads lack the physical ability to chase a scooter. You guys smell like shit! They can't comprehend the scooter. No they can't. No.

Guys like I'm running that fast. Straight up. I don't understand why the homeless guys aren't like cracking the batteries out of it and using it to power like fun electronics You think that the man those batteries are in there good. Yeah, I took a scooter to try I remember you telling me this yeah, they're in there They're in there just grabbed one to see how it works. Yeah, and then a guy showed up at your house to get it back Yeah How'd you not shield it in like tin foil to like GPS? I mean, yeah One time I'm not doing a high time. I found an iPhone Back when I found no I found it. It was on that it was on the ground at a gas station

All right, I was like I maybe I can sell this or something I could use some money this is back when I was living in fucking poverty in Vallejo And then all of a sudden the thing starts beeping and screaming and I went what the fuck is it was the find my iPhone shit? Oh, yeah, I wrapped it in tin foil and I like put it in the freezer or something Like and then the next day I wake up and there's posters my apartment building going I know somebody in here has my iPhone. I'll give you a hundred bucks. I said alright. That's fair And I found the lady and I gave her her iPhone back and I acted like oh man. I was such a fucker Why would you do that?

Man, I was stealing it. I didn't steal it was on the ground. She dropped it I'm aware somebody's looking for it first of all it's very easy to find whose phone it is I know it had been one day I was still in the moral quandary of like maybe I'll find them and they'll give me a fucking award or whatever award Okay, we shouldn't need all these incentives to give someone their phone back I should you lived in Oakland too long look back when I was really poor like I remember I found a T-mobile Sidekick when I was like 18. Yeah, I took it the local store. I got like 200 bucks for it I needed that 200 bucks. I feel bad about it now

Okay, like now I would obviously I have enough enough money, the 200 bucks. They give you 200 bucks for a sidekick? That was back when the T-Mobile sidekick was like new and I went, oh my God, that's a T-Mobile sidekick somebody dropped on the fucking ground. Okay. It was back when I was working at the deli in Boston. I was like, I could use the 200 bucks, I'm sorry lady. Again, it was like some rich fucking MIT student.

I'm sure they can get a T-Mobile sidekick. That fucking school costs $100,000 a year. Billionaire Vito, the top 1%. All those college kids in Boston got more money than I fucking had. Anyway. We had a great system where you could get a scoot anywhere. Scoot around. You could scoot.

You could scoot around. And then just throw that thing in the street. Fling it off in the street. Do whatever. And everyone loved it. Whip it at the wall. Yeah. I'm here. Whip it at the wall. Yeah. I'm here.

Wham! Like the Kool-Aid man. You could crack the doorman right in his stupid face. It was considered impolite if after getting off a live scooter you didn't bash it against the walls a couple times. It was like a thing, like a touchdown dance. You know, you'd get there. You'd like spike the scooter.

You'd go, hey, look, here comes Bungie the Scooter. He's going to do something awesome. And you'd go like, oh, da da da da da da da da da. You'd spin it around and then smash it. Like, oh, that was pretty cool. All rightot. He's going to do something awesome. And you go like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. You spin it around and then smash. Like, oh, that was pretty cool. All right, that was pretty cool. That was pretty cool. I'll give you six.

But now I went to the bar. I went from one bar to the other, thinking I was going to save time. $5, hey, fuck it. I pull up to the bar and I say, how come there's no scoots here at the bartender? And he goes, you can't put that scoot here. And I said, fuck you. I'll put this right up your ass actually.

And I walk away from the scoot like always and it goes, wah wah, you can't turn your scoot off, you're still getting charged. I was like, what do you mean I'm still getting charged? Still getting charged, that's the worst part. That's what I was telling you, you have to put the scooter over there. I have to put it over there in that big pile of scooters. Yeah. What the hell?

What's the point of it then? So I had to walk, so I had to scoot back, like halfway, back to the other place where I got it, and throw it in a big pile, cause now there's little designated zones of scoots. It's bullshit. I didn't know about this either, because I, you told me in your stupid fucking email

for your wedding or whatever, oh there's no, there's no parking. So you gotta park it like a garage, and I'm like, I was driving towards it, and I'm like, there's no parking. So you gotta park it like a garage. And I'm like, I was driving towards it. I'm like, there's probably parking. And then I saw the parking garage. I'm like, you know what? I'll just listen to the email.

What am I? That wasn't for you. That was for women. That was for her friends. Can you put like a little emoji or something that would alert me that that's just- You should have known that. You live here.

You should know, like, I'm not fucking, I'm not staying in a parking structure. So I park in the garage. I start walking over. It's a couple blocks away And I go more than a couple blocks. I think it was like half a mile away. Yeah, and I said I'll just take one of these fucking lime scooters. Awesome I haven't ridden one of these in a while and I'm wearing my nice suit jacket scooting past homeless guys. That's what threw people off the most. Is that what threw people off that I didn't wear a hat to a wedding?

Yeah, cuz your your head looks more distinguished. Well, I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been going hard on the minoxidil. The lights are not kind to you. The lights are definitely not kind. That's the problem. In a low lighting, it does look like you're getting some hair there. It does look like I'm getting a little hair back, though. You look like Walter Goggins.

It's coming back. It's coming back. And I looked at it in the mirror and I went hey, it's not that bad Yeah, also, I don't want to be Tim Poole who wears a fucking beanie everywhere. Okay? Yeah, he's veto the the podcast character can wear a hat to the podcast I'm not gonna go to a wedding and wear a fucking hat. I thought you'd wear a fancy hat I could have wore like a fancy funny hat, but no, well, I almost, I was gonna wear, I actually went to look for like something to wear

and I was like, oh, I'll get these SpongeBob shorts from the Target that'll be funny. I'll wear a suit coat and shorts. They were like 30 bucks. I was like, this joke is not worth 30 bucks. No, no, no. Instead I just showed up drinking a Miller Highlife 40 and everyone laughed about that. And I'm like, that's a good enough joke. not worth 30. No, no, no. It's that I just showed up drinking a Miller High Life 40 and everyone laughed about that.

And I'm like, that's a good enough joke. People, people. Everything doesn't need to be a joke. Sometimes you just show up. I like the, well, you, no, hold on. Your invitation said black tie with a little flair. She wrote that. I didn't write that shit.

And I'm like, just tell me. I was gonna say white tie. She goes, what's white tie? I said, you're not gonna put it cause you know it was was. And I'm honest, you're not gonna put it. I'm like black tie with a little, what, like I gotta wear like a little armband or like a flower. A little something cute.

I gotta put something in my hair. Something that you wouldn't wear all the time. I couldn't find my prop. I couldn't find my prop bucket. I think my prop bucket's in the garage. Like carrot top. Yeah, exactly. Anyway, so I had to take the scooter over.

I was all excited. I'm whipping around to get there. And then it's like oh you're in you're like looking like a hit man I did you're looking you're in a business suit Zooming around hat totally serious be no serious Ended up having to park the thing like half a mile away. I think was oh yeah, so you got it too. Yeah exactly I'm like what the fuck did I take the scooter for then? I'm not even close now. What the fuck was the point of that?

What's the point of the fucking scooter? And I had to have a bunch of homeless guys on the same bench because I couldn't find where the parking thing was. They camp out knowing that you're vulnerable because you have to lose the scooter. If I was a homeless guy, I would be camping at the fucking, yeah, the scooter drop off.

Usually you could evade them and go like a block over and then say fuck you homeless. No, they're gonna park it away from the homeless people. It's fucked, Democrats did this. Honestly,'re gonna park it away from the homeless people. It's fucked. Democrats did this. Honestly we should give a map to the homeless people. Here's the best place to mug people. Here's where all the... No I'm good.

Yeah it's fucked. It's dangerous. Women could be raped. Women should... Well maybe for a woman you do the scooter you can park it anywhere. They should have women parking anywhere. I don't like the scooter I found. As much as men do. I think they're not-

I've actually never seen a guy your size do a scooter. Usually they- A lot of people are not confident enough to get on the scooter. I've tried to trick a couple big guys into doing it with me, saying it's no big deal. And they always know that I'm tricking them. I don't think it is a big deal. That's what I said. When we went to fucking Comic Con, we should have found the scooters.

I love the scooters. We walked. Oh yeah, downtown. Yeah, yeah. I always do it when I go to the con. Zip up and down. They're so much fun. They go way too fast. They do go way too fast.

Man. And it is funny to see a fat guy on there. People go, look at him go. Hey, hey, that guy. Look at that thing. It's like, wah. I was zipping. And then I got, well, the reason I was pissed was because

Maz just drove his car and he's like what are you doing? I'm like I gotta figure out what to park the scooter He's like I just drove my car like a normal individual and I'm gonna park it right here on the street I heard of the venue you should have known that That's bullshit. Why did you tell I should have talked to you ahead of time? I should have said so what's the deal? Well cuz I tried to ask you I said what am I what am I supposed to wear to this fucking thing? No, it said something with the flare. I don't know what that means look

I have to get my suit coat was I had to find my suit coat it was in my garage in a fucking pile I couldn't I don't know where any of this shit is I'll dress up. This is dressed up I got my I got is this oh, I'm that legendary priest everyone is talking about Where the fuck did I get this shirt? I don't know Is that about raping kids? I hope this is about D&D and not raping kids I think you want to wear shirts where it's like questionable what it is I don't know what this shirt is I just pulled it out of a pile and I'm like oh a pile of rape of kid raping shirts I guess I have a kid raping priest shirt.

I didn't even know that. What the hell is that? I'm that legendary priest. Everyone's talking. Is there something on the back? No? No. This is arrest me.

Could somebody look up where this shirt is from? Is this a reference? The fucking tag is still on it. Oh, that's where I got it from then. Well, let's scan the tag. It's a QR tag. So did I buy this? How have you never taken the tag off?

I've never worn it before! It was just sitting on a shelf. Give me the tag. It's gonna go to kid rape dungeon dot net No, it's not working. No, it's an old QR tag. It might be. This is an old fucking code No, I don't know. Okay, I'm really confused. Did somebody send this to the show? What are you talking about? You're wearing it right now! Why are you asking these fucking questions? I don't know where it came from! It just appeared! I've never seen this shirt before in my life! And I just put it on!

Okay, well Alright And yet your coat was in the garage Well, and I left, I keep leaving my coat It should be hanging up in your closet I've left this coat here the last fucking month Well, that's just a sweatshirt.. It should be hanging up in your closet. I've left this coat here the last like fucking month. Well, that's just a sweatshirt. Yeah.

Your jacket should be hanging up in your closet. Scooters, huh? Can't park them. They won't let you. I think it might be, well they said it's like an LA thing. Fuck, great. Like LA has a rule. LA has problems.

Well yeah, that's the thing. I don't know if in other places you're allowed to do it, but LA passed something. There's too many scooters everywhere. We need a designated scooter zone. We didn't we didn't We didn't. The scooters were never a problem The homeless can do whatever they want on the street anywhere. Who cares about scooters there? Yeah, exactly Some stupid naked lady. If a homeless guy can build a tent. Yeah, if a lady can jerk off and the street will do in fentanyl

I'm pretty sure I can leave a fucking scooter leaning against the wall Yeah, but no. Hom's don't take them back then give them a give them a penny or something our laws have to punish everyone Who's abiding by the law? enjoying transportation Everybody else can do whatever the fuck they want. Oh, you don't care about the law do whatever you oh yeah You look like you look like you would put this homeless guys make a scooter company because then the government can't stop You can go. Yeah, you park it anywhere you blow it up Right with a cop. It's all legal. All right, that's my problem. All right, dick

Well, we had a fun time at the wedding. Everybody was drinking a lot of fun drinks But it comes with one of the unfortunate downsides of drinking Socially and my problem is talking to drunks. It's the worst thing ever I was at this wedding and He's talking about I was trapped in a number of conversations With a number of individuals, okay, who thought the things they were saying They're just like I'm killing it telling this story that I literally told him 20 minutes ago

Going over the same ground and the same story you told me yesterday, so I've had drunk friends right you know it doesn't stop them. What doesn't stop them saying. I've heard this before Yeah, they'll just keep going doesn't matter. They What doesn't stop them? Saying, I've heard this before. Yeah, they'll just keep going. Doesn't matter. They don't even hear that. I don't think a drunk person can comprehend the concept of, I've heard you tell this story before. They will just tell it again. They know.

Yeah. They're doing it again. I've had a lot of friends who are really good friends. And then they always go, you want to hang out? I'm like, ah, cool. What are you guys doing? They go, just drinking. Yeah.

Telling stories. And I go, maybe I'll sit that one out. What are you guys doing? They go tell me just drinking. Yeah, you know telling stories and I go I Maybe I'll sit that one out. I don't know. I you know, I'm so full up on stories In one clip of the Sopranos maybe one episode or two Yeah, and it was when Tony said you that remember when is like the lowest form of conversation. I said yes Remember one was the name of our fucking spin-off podcast. Except we're talking about things once. Right. Hopefully.

We're not repeating shit. Unless I bring in low attention spans twice, but luckily I've only done that twice. I should bring it in a third time just to really nail it. Look you like these people, they're fun to talk to sober. They might even have great stories when they're sober. But you start talking when they're drunk and like a drunk person on average cannot tell a good story Here's something I've noticed. Yeah It makes it worse when you are not drunk for some reason and it's not because it's tolerable

somehow when the drinking when the dr drunkness becomes out of sync, then the behavior starts and doesn't stop. Damping up on the side of the drunk person? Yeah, yes. Sometimes it becomes worse in a way that it wouldn't happen if two people were drunk. I don't know why. You don't know the scientific reason.

I don't know the scientific reason, I don't know the scientific reason, but if you have two drunk people, the story of retelling is less than if you have one sober person. The story of retelling really amps up. I think, so like, obviously when you're drunk, you're happy, you're in a good mood, and I think you mistake certain cues from people,

like the, oh yeah, that's that sucks that happen to you as like genuine Like diving interest, you know Like if a guy's going, you know, I can't believe the cops took my kids away. You'd go. Well, that does suck You know, I wouldn't want that happen. Anyway, yeah, they really took him away though and you're like, oh, I'm there with you That's terrible Goes did I tell you how they took him away though, and you're like oh, I'm there with you. That's terrible Goes did I tell you how they took him away, and I go And I think you did yeah, I think I got basically just because they came into my house There's a lot of that you know from a lot of different people

Look you also get look the love bombing drunk the guy who out of nowhere Keeps having to tell you how much he loves you. Yeah You know and you go I know it's fine He goes no no man like I know I give you and I get this a lot because when people are sober They love to shit on me and they think they're drunk too Yeah, well, it's cuz they shit on me cuz they have a secret love for me And I'm like, but I know I know the secret love is there okay, okay? And then they get drunk and they go oh, you know Vito. I give you a lot of shit

You know I give you a lot of shit, and I have called you a pedophile so many times Yeah, but I do it cuz I love you, and I go okay. It's cool man No, you don't understand. You don't understand. Why don't we hang out man? I got a lot of why don't we hang out. Which is fine. I'm down to hang out. You know. You're the most down. If an audio engineer wants to get Korean barbecue okay. Anytime. That's fine. We should hang out, we're good guys, you're a good guy. You're a good guy, like, I don't know, there's like a lot, I think guilt must come out or something

or I don't know what it is. Yeah, maybe. A lot of stuff came out from some people. Okay. Okay. So you've named two so far. I've named zero people, nobody at all. I had a good time, no, I had a really good time and everybody was, we did some things

that I can't talk about on camera, but we had a real good time. It's amazing. There's some other people there who I don't think I can mention on camera. There's all these secrets. Yeah, that's, that's called life. Yeah, that's a healthy thing to do is splitting your private life. See, I'm doing it. Yeah. You always get, it drives you nuts because you're like, maybe I'll fuck it up. I'm not. I'm making little jokes look okay. I wouldn't fuck it up, but there was some cool guys there obviously You always accuse me of trying to hurt people with secret information, but I'm being very you know where's this going? No, I'm just saying I had a really good time. It was a lot of fun. I'm saying your suit looked great. It was a good, I have that suit.

I like that suit. I looked better than the last time I put that suit on, I'm gonna say. Oh, cause of the Zempik? Go to my Twitter real quick. You gotta see this. Did you see this tweet I put out? No.

I was skeptical and I think it's working. All right. I think it's working. right, I think it's working Because I looked in the mirror and I went I went no not the ozempic. Oh the suit look at this. Oh, whoa I went man. This this is like significant Wow, are these the Mark Lars? Those are the Mark Lars. That's from that's from like a hell That's from like a year ago on the left Those are the Markler's. That's from like a year ago on the left. I've been taking the minoxidil and the finasteride.

And you haven't done anything else? Is this like a spray paint job that you have here? I put a little dye in my hair dye to blacken it out a little bit. What the fuck? But you can see, dude, it's never looked like that. You know what I've been doing different is Do you take my accidental at this point? Yeah, yeah of course

Do you use the derma roller? Nah, I just take the pill I take the little fucking thing They sent me so many I cancelled my subscription Same thing happened to me I have all that goo to put on my head And I'm like guys I think I have enough goo You don't do the goo? Nah Bro you gotta be goo dropping I don don't want to fucking put goo in my hair. You take the pill you do the goo

Alright. I'm just taking the pill. Look I put the goo on and then I take they have this roller Which is like a bunch of tiny little needles to scarify your scalp so the goo really gets in there That's too much. So I'm putting little scars all over my head I'm just saying I was actually I looked in the mirror before I went to your wedding I said where the fuck did all this hair come from holy shit. What the hell? Yeah, no wonder you had so much confidence that night. I was feeling good so Well cuz there you gotta do it before I have my buddy who went and got that shit done in one of India or whatever

Not India, Turkey Turkey. Yeah, he went and he got it done. But before you do it, they quote you a price, you go, oh my God, and then they go, well yeah. What's the price? I wanna say. 10 grand? Yeah, like 10 grand, upwards of 10 grand. That was when I first got a quote. But if you take the pills in the goo for a year,

you try to get back as much as you can naturally, and then there's less they need to transplant because they go, oh, you got some of it back back You got all of it over here. They could yeah Yeah, well they take it from the back and they put it like Israel This is like the West Bank here the big the big problem is you got to pick your hairline though You got to pick the shit. You got to pick the shape. It's like it's a big decision to make How would you pick this is a little like character? Don't yeah, they'll lock you in and they'll be like do you want the M? Do you want like the peak? Or do you

want like a straight across? You know if you're like a black guy you want the flat top or whatever? You can't do a flat across. You have to do a peak. Yeah I'm gonna do a peak but I want to pull it down a little bit maybe. Pull it down like Eddie Munster. Yeah yeah I'll get a big spike going. Like a vampire. Chicks love vampires. All I'll get a I'll get a big spike like a vampire chicks love vampire All I'm saying is yeah, I've been looking in the mirror. I'm going this this is working. Something's working here Wow I can't believe that you got to do the goo man. Look at how bad it was. I don't need the goo I don't really care if my hair thins out I mean, yeah, I mean you already locked down a woman and put your demon seed in her But I'm still struggling out here in the paint.

Gotta go hard. It does look bad under the lights. I'm not gonna lie. You should work on everything else too. I am working on everything else, okay? It's all a big process. Everything is being worked on. Hang the suit up in the closet, not in the garage.

Well, it's cause it was in my car and then I was cleaning out my car and I forgot to take it inside. Okay. Well, it's cuz it was in my car and then I was cleaning out my car and I figured take it Inside. Okay. Nobody noticed it was a garage jacket. Nobody said anything Some guys on Twitter said there's some cat hair on there, but luckily they're so dark at the venue. Nobody saw that shit Well, anyway, I don't even know what I was fucking talking about. Oh, I was talking about drunk people. Oh, yeah Yeah, I guess I was just feeling so good about my my regrown hair That I stomach so many drunk fucking rants or whatever.

Trying to escape from a drunk conversation. I have a lady friend of mine who calls me up drunk all the time. Those are the worst. Yeah, and it's always, first of all, I don't wanna pick up. Sometimes I'll pick up because I'm like, well, maybe she won't be drunk.

And then she's always drunk and God she's got nothing to talk and I don't know how to tell her hey you got nothing to talk about and What you're talking about sucks? Yeah, just go be drunk and lonely by yourself And this isn't even like a situation where you're like close to me, and I can parlay it into sex It's literally just my drunk friend. Some people love calling other people when they're drunk. I've never been that person. Yeah, I don't get that at all. Other things, bad things I'm drunk, but never calling. If I'm inebriated, the only person I'm calling is Taco Bell.

And they go, sir, you have to come to the restaurant yourself. And I go, no. I just wanted to say I love you. I just wanted to say, why'd you put fucking cheese on the outside of the Cheesy Street Chewbacca? It already had cheese in it. Drunk stories, I had a lot of fun, I love all those guys. You know what, you take it.

When you're not as drunk, I was not as drunk as everyone, maybe I should have got more drunk. I tried to get drunk. You saw me drinking. It's not something good to be. I'm not good at getting, it takes a lot to get me drunk. I'm huge. I have to really pound fucking alcohol. I drank an entire 40 in the first like half hour I got there.

And then I brought some- I could've went to the hard liquor. I could've done that. Okay. No one's debating how much it takes to be- You know what's worse than drunk stories is the how to get drunk stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's how I get drunk. All right, is that it? That's it, to be drunk. You know what's worse than drunk stories is the how to get drunk stories. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's how I get drunk.

All right, is that it? That's it. That's all. The 1%. The 1%. Drunk people? Stories. I guess drunk stories, yeah.

Drunk stories, all right. Talking to drunks. Talking to drunks. Talking to drunks, okay. Drunk talking. No, because that's you trying to talk while drunk. Talking to drunks. Scooter, parking zones, and-

I do want to get Korean barbecue. I do want to get Korean barbecue. I do want to get Korean barbecue. I do want to get Korean barbecue. I do want to get Korean barbecue. I do want to get Korean barbecue. Iunk talking to drugs. No, because that's you trying to talk while drunk. Drunk talking to drugs. Scooter, parking zones, and uh... I do want to get Korean barbecue though, so maybe that was a good discussion. Is that it? One, two, three. I had soldering.

Did you get soldering? Soldering. Fucking soldering. Okay, go to patreon.com slash biggest problem, go to biggestproblem.show to vote on the problems. And go to killdozerIndustries to get your I fucked this guy's wife and all I got was this t-shirt which I and what was the other one that'll be up soon and the YOLO Epstein I would also wear the YOLO

Epstein shirt I think I could make that pretty quick because it's clear that you're anti you know absolutely what he was doing. Well, I'm pro Going for it. Yeah Pro commitment. Yeah, obviously I don't support. I don't support the commitment. He made the blackmailing Yeah, yeah, I support the spirit of going as hard as you can Yeah, you know, but for me it would be like a clock tower and a rifle for him It's diddling a bunch of people, you know kids Yeah, little people I think he probably diddle some adults along the way

I don't think so. I don't know what was going on. Okay. All right You probably got like a bunch of people talking about already cuz you know, whatever fuck you I'm calling it anyway so Vito when You tweeted who's John dishwasher? the first fucking thing I did was Google John dishwasher, yeah, and Who is he someone already beat to you like 20 years ago? There was like some kind of weird? Indie Avant-garde like outsider writer

novelist oh wow guy manifesto there's Like a John dishwasher magazine that has been a novel of the underground. Did you know this around? For like 20 years. It's just some guy interview who zine maker john really held down a real job and likes talking about fucking magazines so fuck either you're so like terminally online that it's kind of like a LinkedIn to this website that I really doubt I saw this You're just sheer girth your insane weight To lose has caused you to become a sort of black hole and And we've all been. Oh, okay, okay. It's another 30 seconds of that. You're getting a little... John Dishwasher works here.

Wow, you ripped this guy's idea off. I don't think this is the same... Is this the same guy? I think you subconsciously ripped this off. Well, hit about John Dishwasher. This is not a good website, by the way. In January 1994, I dropped out of mainstream society and lived in 13 different... So he's like a homeless guy who literally washes dishes.

What a stupid act. If you're interested in truths instead of illusions, if you value revolt instead of conformity, if you honored the chance takers in the bold, in this moment I am enlightened because... If you value revolt? What's like, is that like a battery? If you value revolt.

No, revolt, like revolting against the system Well of revolting if you value revolting over conformity, that's more like divine brown like revolting look man Don't come down on John dishwasher. I'm learning about this man If you refuse to exploit or be exploited then my work is for you If you refuse to exploit or be exploited, then my work is for you. So this- Sounds like I'm being exploited. Check out my honest to God resume

of 22 part-time jobs in 22 years. So day laborer, day laborer, emergency room janitor, sandwich maker in dishwasher, baker in dishwasher. So this is like a poor guy who lectures everybody on what a genius he is Okay, maybe that's good. Maybe I don't know is he a great fucking writer. He makes zines No, he's very popular. He's not a good writer. I'm gonna say my John dishwasher I have a different concept in mind than a guy who lectures everyone on how smart he is as an actual dishwasher

You know, it's just like you really get in touch with the dishwasher, man. You gotta revolt against the dirty dishes of society. I clean dishes during the day, but I clean society's preconceived notions at night. I exploit society, man. Yeah. Well, congratulations. I parked the scooter right on the edge. I'm gonna trademark his name, and then he's fucked.

You're gonna say you're not allowed to call yourself John dishwasher anymore Got money for a trademark Dude anyway, maybe John dishwasher is really cool. I don't know. I don't want to judge the guy in two seconds But it was a little sanctimonious his website sucks. You already said his website sucks It's a little sanctimonious tell it teaching me a lesson any guy goes you want to see my resume of all the shitty jobs I gotta work no, why would I read that at all? The picture of you washing dishes illustrated anything I would ever need to get from your resume of all the times you wash dishes Are you doing blackface, but for poor people okay? That's cool man the Los Angeles

That's his zine. Oh come on. That's not a zine Good cover to it. Alright. Well now I know about John Dishwasher. Fuck John Dishwasher. Fuck John Dishwasher. Let's make that t-shirt. That would really... That would have been the first public view of John Dishwasher. Macho Weatherman, there's another nefarious type, and that's the smug weatherman.

Oh yeah, true. We live in Colorado. The temperatures went from low 60s to 80-fucking-degree Fucked my world no acclimation period and I've got to wear a lot of heavy shit for my job So my fuck it's hot and every motherfucker I say that to maybe that's my fault for talking about the weather to people I get that I'm an asshole for that. You shouldn't do that. But every single motherfucker goes,

ooh, welcome to Colorado. Like you smug motherfucker, you're in t-shirts and a shirt. You're not decked from head to toe in fucking PPE and FR shit. Go fuck yourself, you smug motherfucker. Fudge rockin'. But vote up Masha Weatherman anyway. Fudge. Love you, bye. Fudge rockin'. But vote a Masha Weatherman anyway. Fudge. Love you, bye.

Fudge reamin'. He's a fudge reamer. Fudge reaming gear. He's in a bunch of hardcore fudge reaming gear. He's wearing a bunch of PPEs, penis packing equipment, so he can go fudge reaming all day long. Penis pumping equipment. Penis pumping equipment. Pumping penis and fudge reaming equipment.

Wow. That's a cool job, dude. The only show that insinuates all our viewers are gay. That's less gay than being a fireman, if that's what he is. Yeah, there you go. Wearing his penis pumping equipment and his fudge reaming. You better penis pump your way through that fire, bro.

No, good luck. I was reading Vito's Twitter, so you don't get that thing ready. And he's like quote tweeting the quartering about how you don't need an iPad. You don't need a new phone. You'll do all this like new shit because like the manufacturing costs overseas is going to go up and vetoes like, well, maybe I want to start a business, you know, doing overseas manufacturing, which may realize something if super killer comes out before the end of April. It's

exclusively exclusively Because Donald Trump made it harder for veto to make it's true Kitchy knickknacks. It's true instead of actually working on his comments. Oh that stuff's already Yeah, I'm making it possible to get super killer veto stuff's already out, I already made it. Trump's making it possible to get Superkiller. Veto. You voted for this.

People ordered the Kitchy Nicknags, okay? I have to, I can't not make the stuff. They thought it would make the comic faster. It did. It's ordering stuff. Although it didn't. It's all been, I gotta get the second one moving faster. Okay, one more. It's not very often that you get to have some kind of like objective

moral superiority over others. Like when you argue with them, especially online. But that one rip-a-verse guy who is like a convicted child molester it's pretty easy win like it feels so good to hate somebody and to have a legal slash support this profile comic book come you're right for hitting this person that you're coming here in what's gonna be amazing slash guitar man your instinct, your nationalisticism, and even your racism to a split degree has been validated. Is Kiss gonna have a comic then? It's a rebelling comic, sadly.

I'm Gene Simmons, I'll lick a butt. I'm having to feel like I'm kind of a bad guy. I'll tell you what's gonna happen right now. Go fuck yourself. Thank you, thank you. Here's what will happen in a rip-a-verse comic, and I'm gonna call it, and when when it happens you all need to clip it. Norfrica will be playing on stage and they will be joined by Slash on guitar.

That will happen in a Ripperverse comic. I'm calling it now because that's how stupid and predictable everything about the Ripperverse is. It's all such trash. There will be a cameo from Slash in the pages of Norfrica number one or whatever the fuck Norfrica shows up on. And Dean Cain will get saved by Brian Solari. Dean Cain will probably be there. Say, hey, you're like a Superman. An Asian Superman.

Who's that other fucking guy who's gotta get in on this shit? Russell Brand? He's gonna be raping a little girl in the mouth. Russell Brand will be there, yeah. He'll be raping. And The Salvage will come in and... That other fucking actor, you were giving him shit where he's like, they'll go and he said the left can't make movies. Fuck, what's his name? Kevin Sorbus. Kevin Sorbus will be there.

He said the left can't make movies, and he posted a picture of- Even I'm not that strong, he'll say. A perfectly normal scene from Snow White. I don't get it. Snow White's like dancing and singing, and I'm like, I don't understand- Snow White broke their brain, dude. Why you guys are complaining about this scene in particular.

There are things to complain about in that Snow White, the CG looks bad. Not for adult men, no. Whatever. The scene of her dancing and singing, I'm like- I had to go. Isn't that- That's the only thing an adult man should be

Complaining about Snow White I had to go see it because my daughter loves it. Yeah, and my wife looks like a shitty Disney movie Anyway, he said the left can't make move The can't make movies and then I posted a picture of the Daily Wires cancelled Snow White movie And I said well the right can't make the high back one the one with what's her name the lady who got fired from the daily Wires from the side hi, my name's I don't understand. What's her name? Chandler bosom bosoms or something no it's her name. What's that bitch's name? Oh? Your Chandler bosom bosoms. That's your name is snow white. She's like hello fucking name She's just like this all the fucking time in every scene. Oh, hi

It's not is it Sydney something. I don't Chandler bosom Chandler bosom. I swear it is anyway They were gonna make a snow white. Did you see did you see what's going on with the daily wire? It's falling apart Yeah First they fired that lady they fired Cindy bosomsoussums or whatever the fuck she said. Chandler. Chandler Boussums. What's her fucking name? Look it up.

I don't care. I don't want to look it up. Okay. And then, you know the Axe Cop guy was making that Chip Chilla show. They made a bluey ripoff starring the voice of- Rob Schneidus. Rob Schneidus as a chinchilla. I like him, but come on, man.

Why don't you write this shit, Rob? This sucks. Also, Rob Schneider apparently was like, Why don't you write this shit Rob this sucks also Rob Schneider Apparently was like I don't want to do it anymore, so they got a different guy. I'm like you were chip chillin That was the whole thing why would you stop being chip chillin cuz it sucks I know it sucks, but like just do it for the bit Okay, anyway, it's lame well the daily wires entire first of all Jeremy boring has been forced has Cooper Brett Cooper. Thank you Carter obviously someone was gonna get it rec Brett Cooper and she's like, oh

Hi, I'm snow. I can't even do it because I have too many trap muscles. She's like, hi, I'm snow white They also made her the voice. Are you charming? Hello, it's charming Thanks for waking me up look he's like sleeping in her head like this. Fucking hunchback, bro. I don't know if she's a hunchback. She's a fucking hunchback. I'll trust your word on it, okay?

I know a hunchback when I see it. She was the voice of the daughter in Mr. Bircham, another horrific daily wire failure. Is she a hunchback? She should have been. So, not only is Jeremy boring, I don't know if you notice he's he's still with the company, but he's no longer CEO. They said so you can focus on his creative projects. Well, that's the thing is I think that he's I think he's only I think he's lost them so much money that he's literally only there to finish his Lord

of the Rings or Game of Thrones thing. Yeah it's a Game of Thrones rip off, it's Camelot type shit. Avalon or something. They invest... They're just making about Israel, man. He invested all their money in a Camelot show that they must have spent countless millions of dollars on this fucking thing. These guys are so fucking dead. And I think he's only there to limp it over the finishing line and then he's gone completely. I think they couldn't fire him because then the project is completely dead. So I think he's just there. He's like, oh you know I'm just stepping down fire him because then that project is completely dead, so I think he's just there

He's like oh, you know I'm just stepping down to focus on creative project I'm like you're just there to finish that thing and have it not be a complete fucking disaster cuz if they fire you no One's gonna watch it and bent key there. We're going to be like Disney. You know we're gonna be right-wing Disney is gonna be for kids bent key is there if you buy it key is his name. It's called bent key No, it's their service. That's their kids streaming service That's what chip Chilla was on key. It's called Ben key someone's house Are you raping them somebody looked it up and it does have some weird pedophile? Connotation sounds I mean it immediately sounds like it immediately sounds like you broke a key

Someone I don't know why they called it bent key, but they're rapists. Well bent keys gone. They fired everybody Daily wire fired the axe cop guy. They've a chip chill is gone. All that shit's gone Apparently she just made shit about God. They just people love if it's not God or football like I don't get it I just don't understand what they hate severance bro. They're crazy. Okay, okay It's like Eric July. They're crazy. They think that there's a massive audience for a thing they invented in their head yesterday, where they're like, oh, there's all these conservative parents who just hate fucking Disney.

They hate Disney because it's woke and it's gay. That's true, though. There's not enough of them to sustain that streaming service. Here's what they think is correct. They believe the five guys they see represent this giant unspoken contingent that is not there. What they think is correct, that what they're making, like Eric Jilai, will be devoured by

a bunch of acolytes that will eat whatever they shit out of their ass. They will buy it, they will pay whatever. But what they're making, but that attention and that support has no appeal to anyone normal because what they're making is crap. Yes. That's what they... Exactly. What you're making... everything you made here, lady ballers, all this shit, it's garbage. It totally sucks.

If I brought a girl over, a normal girl, and I said we're gonna watch a funny movie... Chichilla. And I put on... no, not chichilla. If I brought one of my young friends over... no. You're like that girl that's on the internet that's like 30 but she looks 9, right? What? Shut up! Don't worry about it!

We want Chip Chilla! You didn't say no! There is no, any normal comic book fan, you hand them ISOM, they're like, well this kinda sucks. Yeah, they don't read it. It's just trash. Everything they make. So these guys are living in this weird delusion where they're like, the people consuming our stuff must be tastemakers.

They must be influencers who understand quality entertainment and they're going to spread it out to everyone else. And then it turns out that the guys who consume it are guys like Sturgis who have no cultural impact or influence on anyone else. No one goes to Sturgis and goes, Hey, what's a good comic book to read? Because that guy's only friends are his mom and his fist. Like the thing that they always accuse liberals of, which is being like angry and insane,

is true. But it makes them make good art. Like an angry person was like, man, this system fucking sucks. I'm gonna make this. I have passion to craft a narrative around it. About how the division between yourself and your work self is inhuman and slavery, and it's fucked up,

and they're going to fall in love, and I'm going to have really fucked up reasons in my head for why I'm doing this. Yeah, that's great art. The conservative version is like, you know is like have a God is like me basically Yeah, and perfect and everything I've done in life is perfect Can we make a movie about that a big problem with conservative media? And there's a great breakdown of mr.

Burcham that cartoon showing why it fails is that a lot of conservatives lack the ability to like liberals are always Doubting themselves yeah they'll go I don't know if I have the answers and that creates conflict is like here's what I think here here's what I think the world should be like but I don't actually fucking know whereas the conservative worldview is specifically built upon everything used to be good everything is bad now and if everything just went to the way it was when I liked it we'd be fine yeah yeah that's true so like the big problemcham, you compare it to like King of the Hill where Hank

occasionally has to realize, hey some of this liberal dippy bullshit Bobby's into is kind of cool and fun or might have some semblance of a point. We might agree more than we disagree. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you watch Mr. Bercham and it's basically like I'm the greatest guy ever the liberals suck Well, Cotton is the guy that you're talking about like his dad. Yeah Mr. Birchham like every episode is like Everyone coming to realize they love Mr. Birchham and he always had the perfect plan and everything about him is like Oh, we should have had this guy teach all the classes and all the kids love him or whatever else It's like there's no conflict then.

If the conflict is everybody just comes away to the conservative viewpoint. Well, he fucked up. You gotta make concessions. What is this fucking subscriber number? 19,911, guys, we are 89 subscribers. We are less than 100 subscribers away from 20,000 subscribers.

Tell your friends there's this cool podcast that's very racist and they're gonna love it. So tune on in. Even my cousin, my cousin's been driving around. He goes, I listen to that podcast now, huh? Yeah. He goes, that guy really, he really makes you get on that scale because you're fat, huh? See? Now you get it. I'm like, God damn it.

He gets it. Fuck you, man. I got a really good present for you today Now you get it. He gets it. I got a really good present for you today. Oh good. In the box? I'm very excited. If anybody pays 50 bucks. 50 bucks is the price. StuK4Two, when life gives you lemons you eat them. Frank Lucas, for 5 thoughts and prayers to Woody's Gamer Tag, had to put down his dog recently.

Wait, you didn't read Chrissy Mayers? That's from last episode. Oh, do we read that already? We might have no we did read that okay? Sorry, I'm sorry don't read it twice Frank Lucas for five thoughts of prison He's game attack had to put down his dog and on this week's episode He says he's been losing thirty thousand ninety thousand dollars a day since the tariffs. It's not enough And it's more than I'm losing how can I even afford a dog? Jesus Woody speaking of which I saw, the number could never go fucking down?

Is that it? The number could never go down? Nobody could ever have a house again because somebody has an index fund. Holy fuck, you guys. Crying, the crying about it is just insane. People don't like losing a big pile of money. You're not. Turn off the TV. You know crypto guys, the crypto guys are losing money. No one cares about when fart coin goes down. They say, ha ha, fuck you. When Bitcoin goes

down, they say, ha ha, fuck you. And now SMP goes down, they're like, oh, Probe's the fucking worst guy ever. I'm just saying. You guys thought it was funny when our shit went down. There's so many natural things that can happen to crash the stock market. I don't need a guy fucking around making it go down as well, okay? He's trying to fix the country. Great. So when a nuclear war happened

this is why I why yes Taiwan should nuke China that's step two well that's not how China's giving tariffs you know what we're we're reducing our tariffs on Taiwan purchasing a nuclear bomb from Israel so enjoy that one China all this cool Chinese stuff I was gonna make oh well Frank Lucas for. Frank Lucas for 20 DICK, I lurk. For an LTL trucking company, third or fourth largest in the US, they just promoted three women to VP of benefits and spend, innovation, sustainability, and communication.

It's a debt-free private company. What should I do? Help. You got to develop romantic relationships with two of them. Not three of them, two of them. And then force them to resign in shame. Just get what's coming to you. Get yourself a nice office job to keep things quiet.

Get one of those little things you can plug into the PC and it makes that horrible beeping noise at random intervals. Have you seen that thing? They make this thing and it's like, it goes in the USB slot and it will just randomly make a weird beep. Don't get that.

And it's like disguised in a way that like they can take their whole PC. I think you put it inside the PC. So you take the PC apart, you put it in there and then they go, I don't know what's going on with my PC. And then they go and they buy a new PC and then you wait until they're out of the office. You put it in the new PC and you just drive them fucking insane until they quit. What is this like meatballs? No, it's like a thing they sell. I forget what it they quit. What is this like meatballs?

I forget what it's called. How does it help you a thing beeping all day cuz you need to drive these women crazy Oh, you're trying to get rid of them. Yeah, now you can't get rid of them They're stuck there put a bunch of dogs outside until one of them fucks one and then get pictures of it and go She's a dog fucker. She can't be here get pictures of it and go she's a dog fucker she can't be here oh look at you married man simping for women they're all dog fuckers Mack hunt is itchy for five a female co-worker tries to use the brand new microwave to heat up her stainless steel Yeti cup and destroys the microwave amazing that's pisses you off yeah I mean how would she know how would she know how would she know that that's a problem?

There's no label on the microwave that says don't put a bunch of fucking metal in here. LJCloboreno for five, I finished my Navy time, now I get free college, what should I study? Manufacturing, I guess. You already learned how to suck cock in the Navy. Yeah. So, what else is there? In college you get a bonus helping of that anyway, just's by living in the dorms. So I don't know Why did you why did you go?

He's getting free college You know, he spent yet four years on a boat to think about what you wanted to do study accounting Yeah, no matter what you do. You need also should I hold or sell Bitcoin? I sell it get rid of it Really? Yeah, fuck it. You're I don't think it. I don't People ask about Bitcoin just fuck you who cares at this point doesn't matter to me anymore. You're trolling Let's tell it. Yeah. Yeah, okay. You just want it to go down It's proof they sold it. J-Rob detailing for five cheers boys. I'm on holiday in Spain Oh, I can't believe how cheap beer is two dollars compared to seven in Ireland. Thanks for the show and chat soon

Hey, Jay Rob. Thanks. You got five more bucks though for your super chats Come on saving money on beer Balder for two day five nine eight seven Superkiller is right around the corner Brits mad for two. Hey, we got Eric Weathers lettering up a storm for the next Brits man for two Brits man Brits man Brits man Brits man Brits man. LJ clobpperino for two. You got the power to change one law. What would you do? Well, I'm just saying like, you know, age is a number. Bobby Tercarcino for five, do you have an answer to that?

Not for two bucks. Barbie Tercalino for five Canadian. Richard, did you hear Lando is back? Lando is back with his little Sucon. Where? Tell me where. Yeah, you need to give me details. No way. Tell us more. Vito you need to give me details. No way. Tell us more.

Vito Snout for two, sniff sniff, I smell like I look. Bobby Turcalino for two, Su-Kahn, D's nuts. I gotcha. It's a good one. Black Crimson for five, what's your favorite part of John Dishwasher? Apparently the part where he is a sad, zine homeless man. Black Crimson for another five, thanks for the snacks. Thanks for not killing yourselves. RyDoc for five.

Happy ape swell terrible. That's not a pig related. Swell? Ape? Nah. And none of that works. Deluxe for 10. Remind Dick that he voted for this.

He voted for this. I've specifically voted for this. I've been eagerly awaiting it. Yeah, great. Congratulations. Ramp him up. Ramp those motherfuckers congratulations. Ramp them up. Ramp them up. Ramp it up I even like the Canva

Display that he made that Trump made he didn't need to do that He didn't need to make that big board that sign board with all the numbers on it Yeah, I like when his guy explained the math that was good. I thought that was funny So like oh, they're gonna they're gonna really get their panties in a twist about that math being both cuz a guy figured out What the math equation is he goes? Okay, so you just took see the I mean, we don't care Okay, explain explain it explain it. Yeah, okay, you know dumb it is You took the amount of the trade deficit and divided it what imports first exports of the trade deficit and divided it what imports versus exports? Yeah divided by the amount of the deficit. Yeah. And then somebody did that math and a different

White House guy went no this is what we did. Yeah no. And he goes well in my example I divided it by one in your example you divided it by four times point two five. Totally different different which is one So literally what the fuck is the difference You really got it. You really got him on this one guys Indian guy posting that math you got him people are People are we're really gonna be upset that is It would be cool if the tariffs were based on something factual other than based They're based on fuck you. Give us money. Fuck you, baby. That is what they're based on.

Give us some fucking money. Okay. You guys have been fucking around for too long. I'm sure that'll work. And if it works, you'll all look like Jesuses. If it doesn't work, we'll kill you. We're gonna march the US Army in here and fucking kill everyone in charge. That'll be good.

Then you'll be laughing. I can't wait to get boots on the ground. That'll be fun. For money, yeah. We're doing it for money. Strategie4five, you guys catch that video Veto2 put out today, badass content, bro, after Veto and Veto2. I can't wait for Veto3 to come out.

Check out Veto2. I'm putting up some videos there. Terry Hesticles for two. Crimsl has been mass reporting people in the Discord. To who? Terry Hesticle for two. Crimsl stopped reporting people and get a job, get help. The Discord?

Mikehuntazitchie for two. Get a job, Crimslestop reporting people and get a job, get help. Discord, Mikehuntisitchy for two, get a job Crimslestop, you named Lazy Ninja Eftler. Poito24 for two, Stockrip Vito blown out by the Huthies. Terry Hesticles for two, let's get some get a job Crimslestop in the chat. Crimslestop, get a job Crimslestop. Potfart Dingledorf for five, Crimslestop still doesn't have a job, that pisses me off. Shitlips for ten money Thank you Ian Miller for 50 booty Alright booty has been

Requested shoebox kingdom five get the super chat just to flex on crims will get a job you schizo hobo Timothy at McDonald for five who will yell first this episode my bet is Vito with a laugh slash scream at one of his own Lime jokes. Oh the show's so bad cuz Vito laughs People they really hate screaming and being men being loud. I've noticed there's been a lot of the our main detractors go Oh, they're just being loud is funny Don't they know that you have to have civilized because those guys have podcasts where they talk like fucking church marms and they go Oh, well, the thing is they take they sound like guys Are you believe online with their parents in the other room. Yeah exactly

were you done talking? Can you believe Nick Ricciata went on that podcast? I can't do it. I would never do that. Happy clams for five. I was happy we were getting clipped like crazy. It is nice when we get a guest that were getting clipped like crazy. They're shouting, are they on cocaine? It is nice when we get a guest that gets us clipped on all the hate channels. Are they on 700 proof cocaine? Have they been doing cocaine? Happy Clams for five. It is the type to argue about how wiping back to front is the superior method, especially while standing. Get the fuck out of here.

No, I know the superior method. I don't care. No one cares. It's to install a bidet in your home, vote it up, jab city for five. You know I'm flying back to LA in a few months Can I stay with you? Also you promised to talk to me about my divorce, okay? Is that true? No, that was a reference to a different guy Heart fart, dingle door five. My fucking parrot fell off of my jacket somehow. I don't think that's possible You can super glue that fuck pedophile back on there. Hot Fire Jingledorf 5.

Dude, biggest problem in the Minecraft movie or else that pisses me off. Man, I kind of want... Did you see the... Somebody has leaked an unfinished cut of the Minecraft movie with all the CG, just complete dog shit. And it looks way funnier than the actual... I'm like, dude, you should have just kept it like this with all these shitty 3D models of cows that are just jumping up and down. I'm like dude You should have just kept it like this with all these like shitty 3d models of like cows that are just like jumping up and down I'm like I would have actually enjoyed that

Yeah, pretty funny. I get the feeling that dick does not want to review the Minecraft movie I'm thinking I might need to actually do something with it. We'll see well you should well Maybe me will case swindle for 10 something tells me videos gonna team guys way into thinking of something negative to say about the tariffs. Yeah, I mean, all those businesses laying people off. It's great. Cameron for two. Stock tip Vito. But it was good for COVID, right?

I like that you had that planned out. Actually, when it's good for COVID, it's fine. Johnny Rock for five, RIP white guy. It's good for taxes. Vito's a cat for five. Any hot Vito stock tips? Yeah, you got any stock tips for us? Hims is more than half price right now.

Although, Hims has a problem it has to deal with. Honestly, I think Robinhood stock is a good stock. Robinhood, all right. This is not financial advice, but they've been acquiring users like crazy. Johnny Rico for five. Can you imagine being known as stock tip Vito and not making an easy six figures on put options out of

the tariff announcement Yeah, I should have held my puts longer. Oh When did they expire I? Just sold them early because it looked like Trump was fucking around. I'm like, oh, maybe he's not fucking around No, luckily. I pulled most of my money out of stuff. I Pulled I don't really I don't believe what did we think, audience? One out of ten. How do we bel- Do we believe that Vito pulled his money out in time? I pulled

at least half my money out. Not like completely. I don't know. Half! I dodged a lot. Dodged a lot? It could have been worse. Could have been way worse. Could have been worse. Well I wanna keep- At least you got the free beer, right? I wanna keep some in. I believe in some of these companies. I do believe in Robin Hood and Hymns and Sound Hound,

which is now in the fucking dirt. But I- Yeah, it's gonna be tough for you to claw your way out. I think it'll steady up. You're not buying any stock right now? On the index funds, I don't give a fuck about stocks. Retarded, you're gonna lose money. Okay.

You're gonna lose money playing around with stocks. You lose money in the index funds, too Oh really not as much not as never lose 80% of your shit in the index you only lose a little bit That's and then they replace it Well, but now the index is so fucking top-heavy that it's like isn't it like 15 companies make up half the S&P at this point Hmm, I guess you shouldn't buy it then well I'm just saying there's honestly be good equal weight fund if you don't like that you could do that are getting oh there he is it's my parents my old friend I'm

a pedophile great I'm so glad we're still doing this I'm saying I'm so glad we raised the price of this show to $6. It's gonna really help me out. Let's see. Do you have CD for Bible, SK, be hit by the tariffs? Some of it might. Also, why are you charging shipping for a comic that three years later I'm going through a divorce?

Vito, show some mercy. No. You should be the happiest man on Earth. Why do you need mercy? McCunt, it's a chief or two. Vito, would you mind misogynies? And for another two, he says misogyny's these We got presents. Oh, yeah, misogyny's these much. That's funny. We've got these a guy sent

These are Finger puppets. Why do I want finger puppets? I do but for what purpose finger puppets? I hope you these will relieve your finger pain from Patrick Okay So it relieve your finger pain. From Patrick. Thanks, Patrick. Okay. So it's a finger pain related gimmick. And now we've got these. I mean, I do like finger puppets. I do like these, but these aren't the finger puppets

I was talking about that I wanted to get. Did you mention wanting finger puppets? Yeah, I do want finger puppets, but these aren't the right ones. These are different. We literally just got these. Can you pretend to be excited? No, because they're not the correct ones that I want these are not these are not from the 80s. They're little monsters

They're the only ones that they had at the time What did the 80s ones look like these don't have a theme look here's a guy with four arms? Yeah, here's a fucking robot not well. Why don't we do that remember that shit podcast what the fuck? Are you this is what they look like this guy, but it's not this guy and it's not this material Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I don't know why you had to get five. I think one bag of these would have been enough I don't got that many fucking fingers, but thank you Now you've got one too Shit man star Jack B hearts face You know maybe I could get your pan to put those together or China to put them together before the tariffs go into effect Let's take a look. Oh

Look at that. It's a little guy little guy. It's a little rick bastard soon I'm trying to put this somewhere. I don't stick myself with it. He's got more hair than the one I put together come on It's got like glue coming off of the hair Look it's a face is too big. Oh, yeah. Well. Hey, you know what that is. I have an Amish beard I'm sorry you don't like American manufacturing It says American manufacturing ran out a room to write tism That's sure sir going down to his wiener the shirt card The shirt is coming off that Chinese coming off. Oh look at that shit Chinese manufacturer

I really wish we made more shit like crap. This looks like something somebody made for a voodoo thing Looks gross look at how shitty You know I really wish we made more shit in America, Dick. Cause I don't know if you can get that. Look, your shirt cuff isn't even like sewn or- he literally glued it. What the fuck is this? Did he sew any part of this? Does he have a sewing machine? It's dog shit.

Look at this! That's terrible! Couldn't you at least- Who did this? Jack B? Jack Rockstar? Jack Rockstar made this well It's a piece of you know what it actually looks way more like Riley

That's Riley's face You didn't even use the right color stitches on the other. It doesn't even look like dick. It looks like fucking Riley It's a little Riley doll. What the fuck is the hair doing? Oh my god. The hair is the worst part It looks it looks like you got dried cum in the hair Well, that's that's the kind of American manufacturing quality you'll be seeing on plush toys moving forward very excited about that This is worse than this. This is worse than that is worse than my stupid little bathwater jar. I'll tell you that right now This is grosser than this! That is worse than my stupid little bathwater, Jer. I'll tell you that right now.

Well, at least we now have two plush toys, one of which was expertly made by Chinese manufacturing, and the other one was made in the good old US of A. And you at home decide which is the way to go. Duff Fan, 1234 for $20, says, the biggest problem in the universe is crybaby snitches. Get a job crim Sb for five you know what's up with POTUS obliterating everyone's retirement savings. What is up with that? That's kind of goofy

Lj. Club, you know all of your retirement savings today is that right? My retirement account was up 110% it's now up 30% so wow great You deserve you know it does you deserve to be up a thousand percent. I deserve to be up a thousand. Unbelievable. LJClauborino for two, Vito can you give a fun fact about your brother? No there's nothing fun about that situation at all. Just Eyebun for five, everybody thanks for saving us from the alien invasion. Vito says alien invasion, that of course being a reference to me molesting children to save

us from aliens. Oh yeah, would you molest a child to stop an alien invasion? What? NGR lover for ten much love for Dick Masterson heart heart heart also the fat guy is too cool to Pig Pig Pig Cameron's content dump for five see these smell weird to the old ones from the dentist in the 80s and have this smell Oh, did you want maybe these could go in the treasure bucket? That would be cute. No, what do you mean? Well, I'm saying normally the treasure bucket of the dentist has a bunch of yeah But they'll spill all over the place. Oh, yeah, you know, it's not it's not like this desk is covered in trash anyway

Okay, you want me to put them in here? Do whatever you want. Where's my sword? Do you see it? No, you see the sword around here? I don't see your sword. That's a hammer. Yeah, I know that. Where's the fucking sword? Who cares? All right, what's the next super chat? I don't know. Cameras content up for five. Am in happy relationship. A waitress wants to hang tonight. Do I or no? Yeah, sure. Dominic for two. Can we crowdfund Jean's return Sean?

Jack Rockstar for five I got an encore Electromancer is the bonus used to pay my rent good work. Wait Jack Rockstar you made this abomination Yeah, and he just sold a magic card for like a grand. Oh Should have sent it in you got an encore Electromancer. That's the Miku bonus card John dishwasher for ten more Core Electromancer? That's the Miku bonus card. John Dishwasher for 10. More hypocrisy, man? More like hypocrisy, Marr. Cameron for two. How many hours did the water take you, Vito? Dean Shock for two. Should I play Magic?

Thanks for the last boys. Yes. Stratergery for two. Simple equation. Maddox age equals years he wasted. Ulam Ovok for 20. I for one find Dick and Vito's sociopathy to be quite charming. Quite charming indeed.

Terminiel for 5, just for money thank you. Agnosticousy Maki for 2. Vito, what is that pink red thing you're drinking? It was lemonade with gin and grenadine. Wow. Wings 270 for 3. You can't escape Hassledoctrine, Vito. I cannot.

Stone Cold Flea for 2. Vito's character name is Vito No Superkiller. True, Vito's cat for five, looking especially slough and lint in it, Vito. Am I? I don't think so. Terry Hestacles for two, John Dishwasher told me to say,

Crimshill get a job, Crimshill, your mom for 10, John Dishwasher is a fan of his podcast. I'm kinda worried that there's a real John Dishwasher. There is, he has all the side about him. I don't wanna have a feud with him though. Who cares? Homeless guy though. It's all just part of the life man. Even feuding man. Hopefully he's laid back. Charles Baker for two Charles, Carl Jobs should have minded his own business. I don't think so. Johnny Rocket for five. Rudy is gay

He's a top grifter. Johnny Rico. This is not Johnny Rocket. Oh, Johnny Rico. He's a top grifter on YouTube I was a patron for two years. Spent thousands. I can't take a break last year and he blocks me. Wow. Well, that's how he runs the Patreon. If you ever want to see his best scam ever, the Rudy 6.9 box. Oh, man. Doug Wilt for five.

I need Dick to do another impression of Milo Yiannopoulos because it's just so good. Do we need a cut out face of him? I need my cut. I'm looking for my cut, paupers. I was so, I was so- He's like fucking Sunset Boulevard. Milo is like- What was her name? Vivian? Yeah, Vivian something.

Vivian something? I was so wonderful in the right, in the early 2000s darling, don't you know? Ass sex, anal sex. I bet that's really, I bet that's driving you conservatives wild gay. I'm straight by the way, but I am gay, but I want to be gay. Look at me, I'm dating a wife, I have a wife of a woman. I'm not like those other gays back in the 80s that you didn't know of, darling. No, AIDS, poop, eating poop out of a butthole, monkey pokes.

Milo, what have you been up to the last couple years? Looking for my cats that I lost. Ahhhhh. Waaah. He's like a Charlie Brownah! Waaaaah! He's like a Charlie Brown character. Waaaaah! If you have any If you have any

information about my cat As a Charlie Brown character, he's pretty good I was off to our house for two seconds Off of what? No, out of what? Him as a penis character is pretty good I was trying to give you the peanuts music My cat darling, my cat! Dan and it Dan and not what him da! I'm fucking gay, I'm so gay, I'm so da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da early lose $80,000, yes. Charles Baker for two. Vito Love Slave Labor. Jay Gar for two, have the libs been owned yet?

Let's be clear, I was up 40,000 and then it came down. It's like a- Yeah, let's get the numbers, you know, let's get it down, man. Let's get the numbers right. February was big. Everybody was riding high in February. Look, you're a smart guy. No one's debating that, okay?

I'll check on my- It's Trump. It's Trump's fault. Hold on, hold on. Duff Fan 12445, the most offensive meme is this post-industrial society, America's deindustrialization that has destroyed the middle class. More toasters made in America. Yeah, we need the toasters.

I've lost 40,000 since the start of the year. No, it's counting. CL445, buy the dip, learn a trade. Cody Titus for two, seeing Richard with a ring feels wrong. I haven't even seen the ring. Javcity45, Idea of American manufacturing falls apart the moment Trump put tariffs on foreign precious or resources needed for, yeah, yeah, yeah.

One thousand for touch with. I mean, you know better. You should do it better. You should show us how it's done when you're president. Since all these, you know, all these details that Trump fucked up. I can't believe how stupid he is. I can't believe how stupid he is

and how smart everyone else is. Right now, Yang should be mayor of New York City and on track to becoming president But I said you guys fucked it all up because he has no support except for terminally no he has support He's doesn't have black guy support. Well. I mean, I don't know mayor Eric Adams I don't know what you're making all the free shit for and he goes he goes I'm gonna come in and steal money and everyone goes that's awesome. Yeah, go nuts Eric Adams I'm going to come in and steal money. And everyone goes, that's awesome. Go nuts, Eric Adams.

Case swindle for five, Dick's toaster BS sounds like affirmative action for meth heads who aspire to making toasters. I love this, that they think that's funny. If we just say it's DEI for and then them, then it's like we're saying, but you guys, it's something that you don't like, but it's what you're saying.

Right? That math was pretty bad's what you're saying, right? That math was pretty bad. That really bugs you, right? It's DEI. It's all DEI. It's DEI, but it's like for white DEI, bro? You guys are kind of woke right now, is what I'm gonna say. Bro, that's like a white right.

You guys are actually kind of woke. It's like such a woke right thing to say, bro. Bro. I just think I would let a math guy do the math, you know? Like an Asian guy So I just nobody Okay, so Andrew Yang's the only Asian that can't do math. Isn't that amazing? He can do math free money for everyone That's not what it is

It comes from less people entering the prison system because they have a financial safety net and existing social programs being Reconfigured you want less people in prison? Yes. Have you been to prison? But I'm saying... Have you been to prison? The reason... Have you met anybody that's been to prison? I don't want... I'm saying... Have you met anybody that's been to prison? Yeah. Do you want them in here or in there? Well the people I've met who have been to prison I'm okay with them being out. Every single person who's ever met a prisoner says that. I hang out with cool prison guys. How does letting those fuckers out mean you get UBI? It's just, look, it's not a huge amount of UBI, but it could be, you know, slowly move and more automation, and also,

I think Yang's big thing was obviously VAT tax A VAT tax would cover a lot of it. And that's different to a tariff how? A value added tax? Yeah, where does the value come from? Well it's not a tariff on a specific country, it's a tariff built on various layers of manufacturing. Which happened where? Well, China. China would get taxed, sure. It's not exactly a tariff.

Totally different. And also, wouldn't it be the companies paying the VAT, the companies producing the goods, so the American companies would pay the VAT as well. It's the same goddamn thing as a tariff. It's not the same. A VAT is not the same thing as a tariff. Yes it is. No it isn't.

A tariff is paid by the foreign company, not the domestic company. They've got a guy at the fucking dock. Hey, what's all that shit? You owe me ten million dollars. The difference is, it doesn't matter if they're different, one of them is being used to implement a UBI, which I support, and the other one exists to build toaster factories. Toaster, boom! Toaster factory, boom!

So why don't you make a fucking toaster factory? What kind of factory do you wanna make? A shithead factory. Yeah, okay. Well we got enough- You're our best model. I'm not a best model. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Well, foreigners paid shit will make quality projects. Cause I've seen what the foreigners make and it's really good. Okay, there's a lot of industries that have opened up

because cheap Chinese manufacturing has made various products available that are very high quality. Like what? Camera equipment for one. Camera equipment. It's true. It used to be if you wanted to get a fucking gimbal

or a steady cam or anything, it would cost you a fortune. Now you got Chinese manufacturers making high quality fucking variations. Yeah. There's tons of stuff like that. A tablet, you wanna get an art tablet? You talking about creative people. Okay, creative people have benefited greatly

from the ability. Tablets. Yes, art tablets. A lot of profit is making, how much profit is Apple making off every tablet? A lot. A lot. Yeah.

What do you think happens to that profit if they have to pay tariffs? Okay, but I'm saying not only- What do you happens to that profit if they have to pay tariffs? Okay, but I'm saying not only... What do you think happens to profit if they have to pay tariffs? There's less profit. Let's get that profit down to zero. I already said, yes, large companies are going to be able to weather it, but there are smaller manufacturers of these goods. Not of tablets. Uh, where did I get my tablet from? It's not from Apple. The gay store. Tablets where did I get my tablet from it's not from Apple a store

Just you know Really give yourself a couple points for that one Really really incredible It's like a fucking syntax orech or something. Syntech! It's from a Chinese company. A goofier model than the existing one. Well dude, a Wacom, like a top level Wacom is like a shit ton of money. So I got a Syntech.

And it's nice. You just worried about your lifestyle getting taken away? Oh, what a fucking outrageous... Yeah, that's what you're worried about. You're just worried that the way you enjoy living your life will completely disappear tomorrow Shit, what an irrational fear How horrifying

Everything that I've been slowly building towards You're trying to like pretend that it's like people and companies, which is you You just want to sit there, fiddling around I finally understand like a path forward, I understand what I want to do, I want to make stuff I want to manufacture stuff, I'm having fun selling stuff and being creative and making stuff on the internet. You factor stuff. Yes, you're not like a Toy manufacturing magnet. This is the beginning. This is the beginning. This is the beginning. This is the beginning.

Customized plushies. I could be the plushie guy, but you're not but I could be Doing what? I could make plushies for all sorts of things. China does that. They don't need you. Right, but I'm saying, but they need- You're gonna come up with like, meme plushies and sell them? Just cause it's, just yeah. Like a pizza? I've already talked to other individuals who want to make those sorts of things, okay?

So we're gonna have a John Dishwasher Plus next fucking week. Are you fucking serious? No, we're not making a John Dishwasher Plus. I'm not talking about the John Dishwasher, I mean that you're talking to people who want plushies. Yeah! Who Are you fucking serious? No, we're not making a John dishwasher plus. I'm not talking about the John dishwasher. I mean that you're talking to people who want plushies. Yeah. Who are you talking to? It's a confidential agreement.

I've already been getting- Not Mr. Girl? Anytime. No, not Mr. Girl. Mr. Girl. Although we should make a Mr. Girl plushie. Oh yeah. Likes bad touch, so he can have that.

Mr. Girl refuses to make merchandise. He does not know how to make money as he has integrity Yeah, you know it sucks. I hate it. His integrity is bankrupting him. I'm sorry I'm sorry. It's not making you any money that she's absolutely making me money. What are you making on veto plushies? They're a gift dollar support my fucking life. It's a long long term goal She it's for my patreon supporters. They help keep me fucking afloat. They help make it so I'm somewhat- Somebody is getting kept afloat with donations is not a manufacturing magnate.

I think I'm moving in the direction of look, I know how to make goods, okay? I made multiple card games, I'm making stuff, okay? Okay, alright. I'm establishing relationships with suppliers. You know, I have other guys in the, you guys shit on the lunch boxes. And I get other- Yeah, it's retarded.

I get other comic guys and they go, hey, how do I make a lunch box? And I go, well- Don't. No, do! Why not? Just cause you guys don't like it. Other people like it.

Nah, because nobody is making a good enough story to waste their time on lunch boxes. Put more time into your story. That's what you should tell comic guys. Hey, don't spend time with this shit. Work on your story more better. Put more time into that. There's guys who have made great stories.

They could be amazing. They're all good. They're all great. They could be, you know, timeless. I don't know, man. We're all just trying to get a little something. We're all just trying to get a little something. We're all just trying to get a little something. Okay, Cameron Woody from PKA wants a personal invite

to be on the show. Yeah, sure. Does he actually? Obviously he has one. He can come on anytime. Baldifatue says, Woody can kick rocks. Shoebox King of the Five, he always talks about being Italian, can't even speak,

it probably knows Klingon. A badda da boopy, a bibidda boppy. Klaxon Bear for eight. Vito the virgin, Tara Vorgir versus Dick the Chad. Let's see what happens. Let's see what happens, bro. Yeah, that's your opinion on immigration as well. No, get rid of them.

Get rid of them. I don't need to see what happens. Sure. Get the fuck rid of them. Doesn't matter if they're gang members or not. No. Shoebox, King of the Two, Klingon These Nuts, Fidel Cashflow for five, Vito Goh gambled the super killer money to try and make back your stock losses.

If you lose it all, that's fine. Everyone will understand. That would be funny. Fashionably underplayed for 20. Sorry, no ligma joke for me tonight, driving through a storm to Indiana for the weekend. Vito weighs a blooming ton. Cheers, guys.

For another 20 from Aspartame Brain Tumor, clean the darn dreamcast disk inner with some alcohol and you're good to go. No the fucking controller board is broken. How's the dead 2 deluxe sit in arcade with surround sound is my dream arcade. The only light gun for the DC that was available in America was garbage. I thought that light gun was fine. And for 10 if you guys are seriously looking for a venue for a live show with PK and don't

mind South Hollywood check out room 40. fine and for 10 if you guys are seriously looking for a venue for a live show with pk and don't mind south hollywood Check out room 40. I don't know if we're gonna be able to get those guys to come out to la But it would be fun Paz our gaming guy speaking of live shows hackamania may 9th come on out to Las Vegas Nick. Riketa will be there Paz are tickets are still available VIP sold out. I believe so what are you gonna? Do that's our gaming guides for two I love Richard the oinker is a great punching bag. Chud Bronson provide Vito McNamara's morons proof some can't hack it Yeah, no shit techs booming. So we need factory gigs for the brain dead slugs. No, I don't want retarded guys making toasters

Keep society sane. But you already have them. I'm sure they're fine I'm sure the IQ of the average Chinese factory worker is higher than that of a fucking retarded guy. You have some fucked up sim city view of China like well if it happens over there, it's great But if I move it here with other people I live around then it's going to be bad. Yes That's insane The Chinese have been beaten into the ground in a way that the Americans have not. Which is like retarded. Like that's just something you

say to be funny. No it's like true I think the Chinese ethic is... I think all you guys think that though. Yeah I think that's... Yeah we need... I've seen Chinese guys working... Nobody else in the universe can make phones. Dick! I watched a Chinese guy get sucked into a machine spun spun around into pulp, and you know what the other Chinese guys do? They go, ah, it fucking sucks. I'm sure that made all the things involved in that turn out really great. A guy getting spun around and sucked into a-

I'm just saying, if that happened to an American factory, they'd probably shut the factory down for a week. Yeah, because all the phones would have blood in them. It's not just- Could have cleaned them out. You replaced the spinner, the phone spinner. I think that you think it was a phone factory that was spinning a guy around. Aspartame brain tumor, now that Sean is gone, you can release the Australia road race footage.

I don't know if I have that. That's true. Ufungukas for five, all the blues love tariffs. Bernie, Pelosi, even Obama, quick short videos are in Dick's DMs. Everyone knows. Strategy for two, Vito should have worn a trilby. I had a tie, but I didn't put it on. What's a trilby?

Should I have tied on a tie? Is it a trilby? Is it kind of a hat? Maybe. Johnny Rocket for five, the last wedding I went to my friend's drunk 60-something-year-old dad asked people if they were red pill. It was hilarious.

N for two, room 40s, nuts in your mouth. Matthew for 10, tell Teejah she is hot. What is it, Teejah, am I nuts or something? I don't know what. Teejah for five, the problem with a very drunk person telling a less drunk person a story is that the story becomes sobering for the less drunk person. Chuck Dixon, my ass. Thank you.

Yeah. Utah-based Armenian for two. Vito forgot he didn't do nothing during Voted Up. Who didn't do nothing? Frank Lucas for two. Billy Mitchell? Vito's fat, Eslo Keis. He spelled fat with a P-H, so that means I'm cool.

That's true. My Cud is itchy for five. If Miyazaki made a movie about Vito, it would be called Porco Grosso. Nailed it. And the anime Hole Rapist for 25. Please join me in a moment of silence in the wake of the atrocity committed by John Dishwasher kneeling against Purple Monkey Dishwasher's back, ripped neck.

Phil Ossifer for 5. Has Dick ever heard of Redbar? I've been listening to his stuff lately and he's kind of like a Hebrew version of Dick. They'd probably get along great. I think I was on a show a long time ago. You were on his show. Yeah. Person McPeoples for 5.

Redbar's talked about us before, so we are aware of Redbar. Person McPeoples for five. Vito's only mad about terrorists because his cheap Chachki pipeline will dry up. Liberals don't care about actual shit. Yeah, no, they don't care about anything. I agree. They want people to suffer. They want people around them to suffer just because they're feel similar to them. I am friends with guys who are small manufacturers who make this stuff as their profession, okay? They're all about to get fucked. Good. I know you guys think that their fucking industry doesn't matter, but to me...

No, they don't matter. Not that their industry matters, but they as people don't matter. They have employees, they have businesses. I want all them punished too. Great. Good. Uh, I don't have a job. Where were we? Jesus Christ. I got it, I got it.

Let's see. Uh, Luke and Storm for 20. I've been a paid member of Biggest Problem since the Apple episode. Avoided parasocial stuff. Joined X for the fun, followed Vito but never saw any posts. Turned out he blocked me despite the fact I have never posted anything. Many such cases. Many such cases.

I don't know how you got blocked. Okay. I do not need unblocking. What I need is for everyone to refund Superkiller and visit Toucan Games to grab my completed card game ready to ship Do it to own the lives AKB doesn't go to 2k and games and buy I don't think I've ever blocked somebody who's never said anything But I'm sure you said sure you have aspartame brain tumor for five

Imagine not taking profits and Trump has been talking about tariffs since the 80s kicks mechanic for two. Oh, mr. Silas I'm drunk. You two are just a pair kicks mechanic for two. Oh, Mr. Silas, I'm drunk. You two are just a pair. Kicks mechanic for two. Do not have a job. Take this unemployment gun. I sold my Palantir. You can congratulate me on that.

Good job. Thank you. Jim tells you for five, John dishwasher scours the streets of filthy criminals every night. By dawn, they're squeaky clean. He is the pwned PMS quad. John dishwasher is a time traveler. It has to be part of it.

That's all I'm saying. Gay bitch for 4,000 for two. Great show. Here's some moolah gay bitch four thousand for three. Need a booey puppet of Eric July. Wasn't there an Eric July? Oh man, I would say we should have Riververse make us a puppet, but he hates me, so. He does. He really does. Jack Rockstar for two. He hates me in a way that is becoming like a little cringe. I'm like, I get it, I got it, you don't like me.

I don't agree with that. You don't think it's gone too much of, I want you to die, you fat piece of shit. He doesn't say that though. He has absolutely said that. No, you screenshot and you leave out what you say, you screenshot his post and post him to fuck with him, and you leave off what's said before. What did he say? What did I say? What was said before that

leads him to say I hope you fucking die you fat pig piece of shit. You'll say like well as if I care or something like that. Oh my god! Yeah that's equal. That's equal. I go fuck off and die is equal to well I guess I won't. It just seems like after every other episode I got to see a comment from that guy going the only reason you like him is because the comedy leaves He goes dick's really funny like dicks like a classic radio guy if only you could get away from veto He'd have a real show like real radio. You know I love dick and vetoes the worst yeah Okay, well, why don't you do a real? You know what Anthony? Coo me just got a radio show so why don't I leave and you can do a real?

Important to you that everyone says he's cringe the idea that he's Like agree with I got the message you don't like the show you love dick you want to hug his balls You want to make a little puppet of how many you love them like you? Yeah, I don't know what the fuck happened. There you go. That's right there. There it is I know I know I asked him to read my comic and he thinks it's a big scam and that there's no money. Even though he's like, you spent everybody's money and I've said, hey man. Are you representing his argument correctly? I think I am. He has on multiple occasions said Vito lost all the money and the comic's never happening.

And I've said- I mean I don't know if that's true or not. I've said on multiple occasions if anyone, if a third party wants to look at my bank account and see that there's plenty of money, and everybody's been paid- Okay, so I'm going to show you a look at your bank account. Yeah, a third party who I trust. I don't want any- Okay. Do you want to look at my bank account?

I don't want that responsibility. There you go. So it's not going to be you. Who is it? Who would it be? EBS? I'm saying, how much- I can show EBS, sure, but EBS doesn't want to get involved in that. Guys, I have enough money to print the fucking comic, okay? Well now? Yes! 100%! I already told you guys, alright?

I don't know. I'm up. The number is green. I was up more, and it felt real good. And now it's down, and hopefully it comes back. We'll see. And if it keeps going down, nobody gets anything. But, I think we'll be fine. Chris Primer from 5, no work tonight, so you got to see this live. Thank you. Johnny Rico for 2. Hit like and subscribe or Veto will you know what?

He will. Rape your kids. Who for S? Thanks. Mycom for 5. Did you say for S? That's a dollar sign. Well thank you. Mycom for 5, if you type before 2010 followed by your inquiry, you will get video results only pre-2010 unless you type before 2010 tariffs. Oh yeah, and they all support it.

Everyone supports it, we've always had tariffs, they're just crying about it today. They don't need to be this fucking insane. They need to be bigger. No. Higher, higher, higher, jack them up. Jack them up! Jack them up until Winnie the Pooh is executed on.

Was that your dad at the wedding? Yeah, why? I think I said hi briefly. I should've really said, I don't know. I mean, I'm gonna be a part of the family soon, so. What is that? I just feel like I've slowly become kind of like a cousin. So I should start meeting everybody else

and whatever family functions come on to the marriage No, we had to change the last minute Sport Nugget for five believe it or not veto the goal of factories is not to kill their employees. Yeah, no I mean, there's no there's no there's no logic there. He knows he knows I'm gonna get less Chinese death factory videos. That's the real crime here Dick's wrong about Chinese factories the workers key be them they have these fun nets. It's gonna take the stairs You can jump down and for two it's very nice of you to invite PK. What do you think you okay? What's in the box, you know you wanted so get on the scale right special to shit Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, Boogie, It is good. I promise you that it's good. I don't think it's good. Why don't we take a look? I'm are you sure why don't you smash it?

One more chance, and then I am gonna smash it because it's good. I don't know it kind of doesn't look like a Funko pop. It's not a Funko pop. I'll tell you that. Is it not a Funko pop? Not a Funko pop. Okay, here he goes. Let's see how much weight we put on it? Okay! Here he goes! This is the fault of your taco bar by the way You did this Vsync

Come on Nah, I need to track it I need to track it Nah, I just need to track it right here like I'm doing On the scale disconnected Why don't you make a thing behind you? Why don't you make a poster? You can write it on there and get digital information. Nah, I just need to track it right here like I'm doing. On a scale disconnected. What? Connecting.

My device isn't here. Now it's connecting. Successfully. You got a low battery. Low battery? What? Ohhhhhhhhhh nooooo. Oh no. Battery what oh? No, oh no oh No Yeah, I've got bad news

You're like Sisyphus. I am like Sisyphus. I mean back up the mountain. What we got 288 and a half very amazing oh It is a 2 AMS And you get this very amazing Oh! Uhhh It is a uh Action figure Action figure Limited edition

Oh this is kinda nice Limited edition action figure I don't know if you should be opening it like that Could be valuable Okay well I'm gonna open it This is a Is this a Spread bomb

What's his name? It's a notorious... The... Alright, is it... Notorious... I mean, I see a big fat black guy. It's a spreadvum. Signed. By Notorious... Is it signed? B.I.G. It's not actually signed. That's like a fake signature. How do you know? Because it's like printed on it. Aw. That's pretty cool. Is it an NBA guy? Because it's like printed on it. Oh, that's pretty cool.

Is it an NBA guy? Yes, the notorious PIG. Why does it look like notorious PIG? Why does it look like notorious PIG? It's PIG, they called him. Because he gobbled up all the rebounds. There's schmutz on him. No, what are you talking about?

Look at his neck. It's fucked up. They painted it wrong. No, that's how he wore his jersey. No, no, it's got fucking paint schmutz on it. Brooklyn Well, I obtained a collectible toy. It's a very collectible toy. Look all I know is you know where that weight came from It's all this new hair All that hair you put a couple pounds on. Here's a list from three months ago.

I gotta fix that list. Goodbye everyone. It's been a busy week. Guys, we'll be streaming over on Vito2. Come play some video games. We'll be hanging out. I love you. And come to Hackamania.

Go to hackamania.com. Bonus pro- whatever. You know. You know all of it. And congratulations on being married, Dick. Thanks. Bye. Bye.