The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 3 - Apologizing to Chinese Psychopaths

Episode Date: June 8, 2021

Messed up sex doll fingers, selling AMC, crappy children's artwork, "China Aporogies", female writers, the metric system, Gavin McInnes cries about something, "Disinformation", women banging psychopaths, edgy reboots, and the top hat pooper.

Yeah, that's the sound of a healthy man. Oh, my God. Are we going to talk? We're not going to talk about Patty C. Cups at all. I have to wait till Sean gets back to talk about Patty C. Cups. Oh, yeah. If Sean ever gets back. If.

Yeah. Do you know who Patty C. Cups is? No, I don't. He's the most prolific podcaster of our time. Why do I assume that's a joke? Well, I mean, it is a joke. It's only a joke if you think that podcasts have to be listenable at all. Is he the guy you were freaking out about on Twitter?

Yeah. Because he did something? Yeah. I didn't know the deep lore, so I didn't listen. He does. He has a new podcast every week. I didn't know the deep lore so I didn't I didn't listen he does he has a new podcast every week like as in a whole

an entirely new show and they cover topics like are you hungry where he talks about fast food meals with his guests like not

with chefs or yeah wait I think maybe I heard that are you hungry like what's your go-to at Taco Bell yeah doesn't he maybe i heard that are you hungry like what's your go-to at taco bell yeah doesn't he ask like about napkins and stuff like that yeah yeah how many napkins do you like to grab forget where i was listening i know it was on who are

these podcasts yes it was he puts this like urban patois on everything like yo how many napkins you dig when you're grubbing like he sounds like a bad market. He sounds like a bad advertisement. Every time he says anything, like, yo. Maybe he is. Maybe he is. He did a whole episode of his show, The Briefcase. Yeah.

Get it? No, I don't get it. He did a whole show, a whole episode of his show, The Briefcase, where he just shits on me and Carl. Oh. For making fun of them.

You try to give the guy some exposure. You try to do something nice and get the guy's material out to a bigger audience and he just shits all over you for it. Yeah, he's got to roll with the punches

and take advantage of all this. Mm-hmm. Because who was listening to him before? Nobody. Not even his wife, I assume. Yeah. Maybe he makes his kids

listen to him. You think he goes to his kids and he goes what's your to go to taco bell order they're like dad please how many napkins do you slam i need money for school books while the podcast is about to get profitable oh yeah so there's that he works on this podcasting setup where you no matter what, no matter how many listeners you have, you're making money while you're podcasting. That's the motto of this place, which I guess is maybe a couple cents. I don't know who's selling ads for this absolute garbage that this guy is engaged in.

Is he making money? I don't know. But you get other people to sign up, like Tupperware, and then they make money and you listen to each other's shows. Oh, so he's trying to get other people to sign up and be podcasters.

This is like a pyramid scheme kind of scenario. Yeah. A lot of gay jokes, though. He spent the whole episode calling me and Carl gay. During Pride Month. I know. That's just underhanded.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I don't know i'll wait till sean gets back to talk about it it was funny he sounds like a colorful fellow patty c cups yeah he wanted you for a whole episode yeah 17 whole minutes dedicated to us and how we're um that's an honor how we're worthless how we don't matter how uh how he's gonna quit podcasting because he doesn't want to even want to be associated with us associated yeah he doesn't even want to be mentioned in the same sentence as a podcaster with us so he's gonna quit he's just gonna go to his local fast food restaurants and go up to people's tables if Ask people if they're hungry. Do you like the ketchup here?

What's your go-to ketchup? I'm a Heinzman. You're a Heinzman? A Heinzman. I don't like ketchup. I don't believe you. In very select situations, but for the most part. All right, what are we doing here today?

Do we have an actual show? Yes, we do. Let's do it. This is the last. Oh, my God, that was loud. This is the last. As we know it, biggest problem in the universe reboot sean's travaganza episode here it is for you right now you got us the show that's gonna be live from Mountain Dunker. Dunker. Bronker. Deep in the heart of the city of failure.

Let me host Dick Mattresson. At least half of him. Joining me for this last in our trilogy, our three-part biggest problem in the universe reboot, Johnny the Audio Engineer. Hey, what's going on, Dick? What's up, buddy? Thank you for not killing yourself.

Thank you, everyone, for listening for not killing yourself. Joining me to finish this reboot is Vito Giswaldi. I'm excited. This is our return of the Jedi here. Yes, it is. The revenge of the Jedi. Which one are you? Are you the good guys or the bad guys? I would like to think

I'm Luke Skywalker appearing with my cool green lightsaber. The bad guys. We should do the announcements. I don't have a drum roll like Mad bad guys. We should do... Should we do the announcements? I don't have a drum roll like Maddox. I should have just stolen Maddox's drum roll.

But here is the rankings from last week. The winner was Fat Brain. Yeah. That was me. Big win. I saw that one took an early lead. It did. I knew it was a runaway.

Yeah. Anything shitting on fat people usually. I know. It feels like it's a runaway yeah anything shitting on fat people usually i know it feels like it's a little too easy maybe even with fat people they all they will vote it up too i hate myself too i'm gonna vote for that one yes i do coming up next was the war on black face all right well i took a solid second there that was a little intellectual that problem a little too uh high reaching yeah um kid friendly pride that came in next and then lack of bidets which honestly should be number one yeah um well i'm gonna say even though it came in last i saw a lot of comments where people are like you know

what right after the show i went on amazon and bought a bidet good and i'm like at least it changed some lives that's all i care about i think it's the homophobia in this country that stops more bidets somebody was saying that their dad was like really opposed to the bidet like it was a gay thing like oh i'm not gonna let a thing blast water up my butt what am i what am i a queer and you're like dude like it's just sit down why don't you have an opposite of you know like a boomer how to catch a boomer with chris hansen bringing idiots in like that why don't you have a seat? You put paper on it. An opposite of, you know, like a boomer, how to catch a boomer with Chris Hansen bringing idiots in like that. Why don't you have a seat?

Is it better to be- Tell me about this ass blast? Yeah. What are you talking about? How is it better to be touching your butt with your finger with a piece of paper between it? That's gay. Yeah, that's way gayer if you think about it.

I have a machine between me and my asshole with a bidet. Right. There's like space. Part moving parts. You're not groping around your butthole. Yeah. Well, I thought that should have placed higher, but there you go. We talked also about

doing this on the reg. This biggest problem in the universe. What do you think about that? I think if people like it, it's all up to the audience. By like it, you mean shell out the big bucks. Well, yeah, we got to, I mean. Vito's got to see a little taste.

Classic Italian. Vito's got to see a little. Extort people. Money or little boys. That's what. Yeah. Send the children. No, I'd be down to do it, like I said,

but there's a little bit of preparation That goes into it Oh here we go You don't even print your stuff You read it off the phone I'm gonna print it I just didn't print it this time Talk about preparation No no no no

You don't have paper in front of you Well cause I don't know How involved I should get Cause you sometimes Just go off the cuff I'm like ready to print That's cause I memorize everything I have dyslexia

So I have to memorize All my notes This is just for show So you're fucking Making fun of my disability that i've had since i was a child look i have to memorize all my comedy i'm prepared to bring like video clips and audio and whatever else but then i'm like i don't want to be the guy who's like overly prepared and i ruin the whole format you have to fucking mixed media what are you giving a ted talk i'm still yeah i kind of i'm figuring out the format. What could be in a clip?

Maddox used to bring in clips all the time. Like, what is this that I'm fucking... Sometimes there's a relevant clip. Yeah. Look, the point is, yeah, I'd be down to do it. The point is, if you're a Patreon, I was thinking about it. And we could do a new Patreon for the biggest problem, right? But then anybody who subscribes to that, first of all, they might take money from me.

I don't want that. Yeah, don't want that yeah don't unsubscribe don't unsubscribe from dick uh but no the real the real reason is anybody who subscribes to that is gonna not get bonus content on either of our patreons right that's my thinking but you're saying we were talking if your patreon goes above what uh i was well right now my patreon's at about a grand so i was going to say if i get an extra 500 on there 1500 then we'll do a monthly we'll do a monthly episode okay yeah that sounds fair to me i think that's reasonable if a certain number of your audience wants to come over yeah patreon.com slash the veto show um and then we're gonna do it yeah then we'll do it it'll show. And then we're going to do it.

Yeah. Then we'll do it. It'll be free to everyone. We're not going to pay wallet. Why would we pay all this service? No, I don't want to pay wallet. I think it would be good.

That we're doing to society. It gives us the incentive. Or at least it gives me the incentive to put stuff together. It's always about money. Whatever, man. It's fucking always about money

with this guy. Fucking always. I got a bunch of stuff I got to work. I got to carve out a little piece of my schedule. I do a bunch of other shows that don't make me anything, so. Oh, and that's the audience's problem that you waste your time on bullshit. That's everybody else's problem.

They have to pay for it. Whatever, man. To support your lifestyle. Yeah, exactly. Of arguing about pedophilia online. That's on everyone to pay for we're subsidizing that shit away from that argument well if you want us to reboot the biggest problem as a monthly installment maybe i'd bet i could talk you into bi-monthly i would be a little

bi-curious if the audience is again if the audience likes it more money no but also you know i'm worried that everyone's gonna turn on on me and go, Vito ruined my favorite thing. You know what? It's my favorite podcast back in the day and the reboot's terrible. Ah, fuck those people. 80s girl is saying, God, everyone, we had a party last weekend and right after Vito left,

she turns to me and she goes, oh yeah, I got to talk to you about Vito. And she's like, everybody really loves him. He's like the light of the party. And she's like, it's just, she sounded like my mom. She's like, it's just so sad that everyone on the internet

hates him so much, but everyone in real life loves him. I just don't understand. And I said, well, honey, he's not arguing about who and who isn't a pedophile

at the barbecue all weekend. That's part of it. Yeah, I'm way more obnoxious. It's weird. Like on Twitter, I'm like kind of a different person. Really? Everyone on Twitter

is a different person. You're a different person. When you're typing things, it's like you're reaching into a different person. Really. Everyone on Twitter is a different person. You're a different person. When you're typing things, it's like you're reaching into a different part of your brain. Yeah, the evil part. I don't have to see the person I'm hurting. This isn't me. This is Karl Marx wearing sunglasses saying this. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

I don't get banned from Twitter. That guy did. Jerry Lewis did. Everybody, like your family, you're like, I can't believe my uncle is such a horrible racist on Facebook. But then you talk to him in real life. It's like a whole different thing. Okay, well, that's food for thought, everyone. Go to patreon.com slash the veto show.

And again, don't unsubscribe from my Patreon. That's the worst thing you can do. Additionally subscribe. This is for all the people who said I would pay more for this content. And I'm sure there's stuff at your Patreon they could also get, right? Yeah, I put up stuff on there. Like what? A little like what?

Like wow me, something good, something really great. Really blow my brain, my fucking balls off right now. What do you got there? So just tell me. I'll post my videos ahead of time if you watch my YouTube stuff. I also post like the uncensored versions that have jokes. Uncensored version full of the N-word. Well, not exactly, but jokes that I'm worried YouTube would demonetize me for.

Maybe we'll post my blackface video on there at some point. Do you want to tell people what your blackface video was? Did you like the idea? I want you to tell it. All right, I'll tell it. Is that an answer? It's really stupid, but I was like... Oh.

No, no, no. I was like, all right, so people are so mad about blackface. So what if you made a video, right, where it's just you looking into a mirror, just silently applying blackface makeup with no commentary, right? Right, right. You just upload it as like blackface.avi. Okay. And you leave it there for like a week.

Everybody gets really mad. They're like, I can't believe YouTube sensation Vito would do blackface. We have to cancel this man. And then like a week later, you reveal. Yeah, exactly. Then a week later, you reveal you were putting on green makeup, which you then color keyed to brown. Does it really count? Does that really blackface?

Yes. How, though? Because you were trying to make it look like you were doing blackface. Because you were doing hue saturation. Digital blackface. Digital blackface. You can't even use open shifts anymore, man. Yeah, you're not allowed to use those.

You're definitely not allowed to fake blackface. I don't know, man. I think there's something there. Oh, my God. I'll tell you what makes me rage this week before we get to our problems. Did you guys happen to see that sex doll that's in the other room? Did you pass? Did you happen to see it? Did you take

a good look at the sex doll? I touched its weird rubbery skin. The skin is a little off, right? The pigment's a little off, too. Yeah, it's a very pink woman. It's a very pink woman. Did you happen to notice that she's got the worst case of cerebral palsy in her fingers? My fucking friend brings over to our barbecue, which is the reason I say don't ever bring kids to my house ever,

because I don't know what people are bringing, brings over this sex doll from a production shoot, a real sex doll. Yeah. A real live sex doll. And first of all, she is fucking heavy as shit like throwing a drunk girl out of your literally throwing like you think 125 pounds is no big deal like oh i could carry that i mean i weigh whatever i lift myself every day 125 pounds of sex doll is it feels like you're lifting the earth. It feels like she's bolted in

somewhere. I don't know how these perverts who have sex dolls, I don't know if their legs are all built like Lance Armstrong or something from hauling their perversions around, but I almost broke my back every time I carried her. Some jackass put her in the studio in

Johnny's spot. I had to lift her out of here. I was like, that's all I got for the day. I got no more effort in me. Secondly, some asshole bent her fingers all up. Why the fingers? This is a $6,000 sex doll. Yeah. Right?

Is it? Yes. Real dolls are very expensive. Did you look up who made it? A real doll. Is it actually a real doll? Yeah, yeah. Oh, because that's like the top of the line. Top of the line.

Oh, man. That's the crumb to the crumb. When you're done beating off with a little tube, silicone, you're done beating off with your hand or a blowjob machine and you want a woman who's got spikes coming out the bottom of her head. She's got fucking spike, like spikes coming out the bottom of her heels she's got fucking spike like metal coming out the bottom there's so many things

about it that I would find a non-starter for singular eroticism she doesn't have that heavy metal skeleton she's like the Terminator yeah

yeah um but some jackass went and bent her fingers into crippled Jesus's uh

fucking learning how to play the guitar right like all crabbed and fucked but they made them they made the bar Triple Jesus' fucking learning how to play the guitar. Right? Like all crabbed and fucked. But they made the bars inside like pipe cleaners. Like you would think it would be an articulated skeleton,

like an action figure. Just give it a kung fu. I'm going to stick my dick in it. That's what's going to happen to the hands. Just start it like a He-Man with the hole in it. Right? It's ready to hold the battle axe. And put a lever on her back so I can jack myself off from watching tit-spounds. But instead, it's got these

pipe cleaner fucking fingers. It's got pipe cleaner fingers. And you know pipe cleaner, once you bend it, is never going back straight. Never. So some jackass came over, some cockblocker came into my house, not his sex

doll, and bent the fucking fingers that are unfixable into these weird crab shapes. So I tried to put it back, and I'm like, well, I just gotta chop her fucking hands off. I can't fuck this sex doll the way it is. Like, now, because now I'm thinking about you. I'm thinking about the guy that did it.

Every time I see the crab hands, I'm like, I know exactly who fucking did that. Just do some Islamic role play and like put her in a hijab and accuse her of stealing. Stealing?

And then just chop that hand off. That's a man's only crime. That's true. So that made me raise. If anybody knows how to fix the fucking hands on a sex doll. That's what was making her throw up gang signs.

Yeah, she's like, you know what? I'm going to shape it into blood. That's probably what he was doing, yeah. Just trying to make the... Nobody, did anyone make any money off this? Blood? This is one of the greatest inventions in human history. Did anyone make any money?

Did they come up with blood before? Some fucking guy. Some guy figured this out. It's a better invention than the wheel. And we don't know his story. There should be movies about this man. For those who cannot see this, Dick is showing the bloods. You can use your fingers

to form the word blood. Yeah. So hard. So I hold up three fingers, white supremacist, I'm fucking flashing a gang sign on the show. No big deal. Yeah, that's fine. The bloods are cool. Whoa, really? Oh, Black Lives Matter.

What are you, what are you, which side, wait, aren't Bloods East Coast? I don't, I thought they were on all coasts.

No, no, no, this is Crip, this is Crip Town. C-Town. This is Crip Town. Yeah, I don't know. I'll tell you what else makes me rage.

I, uh, this is the last show I'm gonna kill myself. Um, I, Your girlfriend's crippled, uh, crippled fingers make her part of Crip Town, by the last show I'm going to kill myself. Your girlfriend's crippled fingers make her part of Criptown, by the way. I'll call her my girlfriend.

I sold my AMC at $14. I remember that too. I felt bad because I remembered our discussion where you're like, should I sell? And I went, yeah,

I don't know, probably. You know what it's at now, Johnny? a million dollars that short squeeze the stocks are you familiar with stocks oh yeah oh my god it's worse not getting something not getting money that you would have got yeah is is infinitely worse than losing money the squeeze was real quick, though, because it shot to 35 and then right back down. God damn it. I sold a little too late.

I think I only made like a grand. Oh, you make me... Actually, okay, here's the order of how bad things are. Money that you could have got. Yeah. Money that you didn't put enough money in. Right. And then money that you just lost. enough money in. Right. And then money that you just lost.

Yeah. Burned. Gambling. Like, well, that could have happened. Yeah, once you lose it, you're like, yeah, that's, you know, it's the money that you had in the hand and you let it slip.

Yeah, it's the money. You were right there, and then I just decided, well, you know. Let's see what it feels like to have paper hands today yeah what's the worst that could happen

oh it's happening it's happening in real time everyone's all celebrating and being happy and you're not part of it they're gonna tell this story for years

about the time they dragged the Grinch through town and the noose hung his body up on the tree and I was where was I

ah fucking went to the store you guys killed the Grinch and pulled his stomach out and crippled his fingers? And the worst part is, right now you're like, well, what if it happens again?

Maybe now, yeah. How worse would it be if you missed it a second time? Fuck it, I'm out. I'm done. I'm only collecting Pokemon's cards. That's actually probably wiser right now. That's it.

I'm going back to what I know. You can't grade the Pokemon cards, though. That's actually probably wiser right now. That's it. I'm going back to what I know. You can't grade the Pokemon cards, though. That's the big problem. What do you mean? You know they have the trading card grading services where you send them off and they give them a score? Yeah, they're not accepting submissions because so many people are getting their cards graded right now.

What do you mean? There's a back, like a... Yeah, there's literally... A registered firearm? There's a backlog of like, they're like, we, there's literally, there's a backlog of like, they're like, we are not sending, we will not be grading any other cards for the next year.

Is it that hard to grade? Do they like, they're hiring, have a fucking CSI team in there? people send them like 500 cards at a time. Like it takes, you know, they got to go through them.

They're hiring new graders or they're trying to. Oh man. Again, it's this whole Pokemon scalping bonanza. Everybody's lost their mind. Same for sports cards and everything. Did you see that they're letting us in California have assault weapons again?

Really? Yeah. How about it? What do you mean? Federal court struck it down. Oh, they said? That shit's unconstitutional. The federal court said,

are you fucking kidding me? What are you talking about? Can't do this. Shall not infringe. Right, right. Motherfucker.? Can't do this. Shall not infringe. Right, right. Motherfucker. That's what they said. Shall not infringe, bitch.

What was the law on the books in California? Just complete ban? You could only buy dildos. Yeah. At a gun store. You could only... Yeah, it was a ban. Complete ban.

For how long, though? Forever. That's what it was. Couldn't have any kind of... I've never tried to purchase an assault weapon in California, so I don't know. Really? What kind of weapons do you own then? Typically, you know, samurai swords, you know, gun blades.

Do you have a samurai sword? I do. I have a... It's a ceremonial. It's not really... That's a joke. What does that mean? I have like a stupid prop samurai.

Do you have like a kimono that you dress in on the weekends, like Otho from Beetlejuice going around. I practice the way of the blade. No, I have like a stupid prop samurai sword I bought for a short film like back in the day. What short film? I was actually a pilot. Did you like volunteer like, oh, guys, I'll buy the samurai sword.

Do you use the samurai sword? Don't worry, I'm right on top of it. I'm not really needed. I got it, I'm the producer I got it I got it I got it yeah I bought all the props I put half of our budget

into the fucking samurai sword so look it's gonna look great this is an ancient samurai sword shooting it just to get the samurai sword I'm pretty sure

it's enchanted by the thunder god Raiden and I've been practicing with it for months to make sure it's good to be used on film you know what else annoys me about this X-Song it's made out of like plastic it's good to be used on film. You know what else annoys me about the sex doll?

It's made of like plastic. It's not a real... Yeah, what? The tits are... They could be... Like if this is a sex doll, I mean this is... It could be like anime size. Well, you gotta...

That's why normally... If I'm carrying around fucking 120 pound metal exoskeleton, I would like tits that are bigger than my head. Which is significant. Looking a gift horse in the tits. Look, man, when you get a free one, you don't get to pick all the assets. Next time, when you get to customize normally, they have one.

I'm going to start collecting sex dolls now. First of all, I need one with new hands. It doesn't look like somebody smashed the fucking piano key guard on them while in their middle they're playing all right um should we do a should we do our problems sure okay i won last time so you go first i go first my problem is disinformation quote quote quote disinformation or misinformation uh because we're rapidly so the Fenucci emails leaked. Did you see those?

They didn't leak. It was a Freedom of Information Act. That's not a leak. The government leaked that shit. The government doesn't want you to read that. Somebody filed some kind of a secret form. Yeah, by law

they have to give you that. They made a wish. For sure. Call it a leak because it sounds salacious. You know what I love about them? Every single email is like can you take care of this?

Can you take care of this? Can you take care of this? Can you take care of this? Like an auto responder could do this guy's job. Right. So we find that the lab leak is true. The lab leak turned out to be plausible, right? Maybe it was made in a lab. Oh, shit.

The mask, shit. Well, his YouTube video just got demonetized. He says in his own words, well, the masks don't work for keeping you safe, so don't bother with them. Did you see that email? He was saying that, yeah, like privately to like a friend or something. Yeah, she said, should I wear a mask? He goes, nah, that's retarded. They don't work.

They don't keep you from getting sick when you need it. Was that before or after, though? Was that like early on? Because early on they said. What's check? Well, early on they didn't know whether or not masks were effective and then they decided later oh yeah they did they are not i don't know uh my problem with it is we're rapidly approaching a technological cybernetic singularity wherein the

government and big tech are indistinguishable from one another yeah uh vis-a-vis they're both they're both uh they're both pursuing the same goals which is maximizing profit uh if you think the government is anything but an extension of corporations desire to maximize profit you're an idiot go to go to another country and sell that shit uh there um disinformation was created by the Soviets and Americans to actively delude the public. And now they're pissed. Now that they're calling it, it's people not believing what the government says. Like, I don't know if you guys are shooting me straight this time.

Like, well, this guy's spreading disinformation over here. Like, what's disinformation? Well, we invented it when we lied to you. When we lied to you for decades. Yeah. Which I find a little too on the nose. Yeah. The label has become simply a way to write off

what is inconvenient or any kind of debate about anything, about anything. It establishes disinformation, establishes the idea that there is information which is not true. Not even a little bit. Yeah. Which is what annoys me about it.

That's my problem, Vito. It is the lab thing. Because I was always like well how do you know it's not from a lab? You don't know. Why don't you just say

you don't know? Also, why does it matter if people, I didn't understand why Twitter and Facebook were mad about people saying that. Why?

Because it makes China look bad? Yeah, China's bad. Yeah, they're bad. Yeah. They always do bad stuff. So accusing them of bad things, just be like, yeah, okay.

Well, yeah, they're awful. What else? I have some examples of disinformation here. White supremacy is the biggest threat facing america today do they say that oh that's say that well yeah it's people who are determining what is not disinformation i love all the times where they're like uh asian hate we got to stop asian hate you're like oh who's who's hating the asians i haven't heard

about this you're like wait do you have a video heard about this. Well, yes. I don't know. You're like, wait, do you have a video of an Asian person being assaulted? Yeah, but don't watch that one. Why not? Who's in it? I don't worry about it. Delaware, Mass, EF. One in five Americans say they primarily got their political news from social media in 2020,

according to Pew Research Center. And they're also pretending that this is something new. You remember when we were kids, I believed that after you beat Mike Tyson in Nintendo's Punch-Out!, you would have to fight a shadow version of yourself or a robot of some sort. This information has been around forever.

It's just now convenient to stop it when the narrative is something obviously political like, well, I don't think I should get a vaccine.

I'm not worried about these things. So I'm just going to keep living my life. Yeah. I got the vaccine. You did? But I understand

why people don't get it. Why? I mean, look at like ddt and all the other stuff the government's like yeah we got this figured out and then you get all the disinformation that the government was telling exactly it's just perfectly then your kid gets born with sex doll fingers it's a horrible uh nightmare i'm gonna send the sex doll back and say the fingers were all busted send it back to the guy who gave it just send floppy just put nothing in the fingers were all busted. Send it back to the guy who gave it to you? Just send floppy, just put nothing in the fingers. No, because you want to wrap them around something.

That's why they're opposable. But they're, it's silly putty with pipe cleaners in it. How are you going to jack off with that? Some guys, that's what they want. I don't know. She's got a working mouth though, right? The Soviets spread. Unfortunately, yes. she's got a working mouth though right the soviets uh spread unfortunately yes

but the teeth are rubber too though so and the nails are hard the nails are hard the fingernails are hard so it's like this goo it looks like somebody put a lee press on nail into silly buddy yeah i don't know the hands are... You're making a lot of sacrifices when you commit to the sex doll lifestyle. Hands are hard. The Soviet Union spread the disinformation,

this was in the start of the disinformation age, that the U.S. invented AIDS. Disinformation? That's a matter of fact. Right? Yeah.

What is... Who is this hurting? Like, whose life is significantly impaired because they think that the U.S. invented AIDS? And I guarantee you that's not the dumbest thing they think. Do you know what I'm saying?

Yeah. The U.S. did not actively... A fake document reported that the U.S. supported apartheid. Oh, no. Oh, wow. Let's see. There's a bunch of shit on Trump as well. Yeah, this all sounds, like, cute, Oh, wow. Let's see. There's a bunch of shit on Trump as well. Yeah, this all sounds like cute, this disinformation,

compared to what people believe now. Which is, I don't even know, what is so bad people believe now? I don't know, man. Healthy at any size. That's it. Yeah. That's disinformation. How come they're not getting busted?

How come Cosmo puts a whale on the cover of their magazine and no one's stamp Facebook doesn't delete them? Food for thought. Food for thought. Too much food for thought. I have more stats here, but I don't really care about them. Oh, yeah, here we go. Future healthy information environment.

This is an expert on disinformation. Probably doesn't involve Facebook or Twitter at all, at least in anything close to their current forms. It involves a completely redesigned internet. What is this person's name? Ryan Milner? Phillips?

I don't know. Some lady that is an expert on this. My guess is it will take us 50 years to clean up, she says. All the disinformation. All the disinformation. You know, like 50 years ago, it would be so easy to predict where we would be right now in the year 1971.

It's going to take about 50 years. People lying online and just bullshitting, that's going to take us about 50 years to clean up. Open your checkbooks. It's a big money grab. We'll also all have rocket pants by then. It's a big money grab by big tech and the government, which are the same entity as they have always been

and continue to be so. It's a big problem. They benefit. Yeah, it's the elimination of free speech forever. They can call something disinformation. Hate speech works, so they invented a can call something disinformation and get it deleted. Hate speech works so they invented a new category called

disinformation. Now, big techs can delete that. What else is like Facebook and Twitter banned? I know you can't, on YouTube, you can't talk about

9-11 conspiracies. You can't talk about any false flags. Yeah, thank God. Whatever. Stop that disinformation from getting out there. Like, it's retarded.

All of the things they're stopping are retarded things for retarded people. Well, I'm just worried that at some point there is going to be, like, a plausible governmental conspiracy. And they'll go, no, no, no, no, no, no. Wait a minute. They're all, like, Pizzagate was thrown around in my research. Pizzagate was thrown around. I'm like, wait a minute, but there are a bunch of pedophiles in the government. Sure.

They're always getting caught. They're always doing bad shit. Oh, like the Pizzagate conspiracy. I mean, in the details, it's an insane conspiracy, but the point is valid. You're all a bunch of pedophiles and whoremongers and warthogs. That's what we're asking. Where is that? We get one little morsel.

Oh oh oh Pizza Alright alright Let's see more about this Well the Whatever Podesta's got a bunch of Very creepy

Pedophile artwork All over his house I'd sure like to know More about that That's a conspiracy It's not a conspiracy I can fucking see it Some of that stuff

Yeah totally I don't know Yeah and I don't know How they differentiate Like what you're allowed To talk about or not. Whatever's not advertiser-friendly. We're just getting fed a steady stream of advertiser-friendly bullshit

all day, every day, and questioning it, questioning it. People are on board with saying, well, you can't say the N-word, you can't be racist, that's hate speech. Like, okay, all right, all right. I agree, but now it's— We should have never ceded that line because it's just gotten worse and worse but now it's well i don't even want to say that but the other stuff they don't want me to say i'm like oh come on you can't take that word away now that's one of the best ones i can't even say it youtube will youtube will get mad anyway that's my problem the quote

the quote information information hate speech part two. There you go. It's coming to get you. Now, when everybody lives in their pod, when everybody lives in their shared work space, live space pod, and you get busted for asking like, well, I don't want to wear three masks. That's disinformation.

Get that guy out of here. That's revoking the terms of service. Get out of here. Is it safe to eat this bug paste every day? Get out of here. Get out of here. That's disinformation. Shut him down. I don't know. It the terms of service. Get out of here. Is it safe to eat this bug paste every day? Get out of here. Get out of here. That's disinformation. Shut him down. I don't know.

It looks kind of gross. It does not look gross. That's disinformation. Yeah. All right. Well, I guess I should do my problem. Following up on the China stuff. I mean, talking about the labs and whatever else.

China's always very, always trying to control the conversation. They're really fucking around. Yeah, they really are. Fucking around. What drives me nuts, though, is the people who capitulate to them because my problem is these sniveling apologies to China. Okay. Now, I don't know if you saw that Mr. John Cena,

beloved wrestler and up-and-coming actor, was very excited to be talking. Up-and-coming, he's a cum. Oh, yeah, he's here now. He kind of took like a break and arrived. Oh, did he? Yeah, it felt like there was a while where he wasn't really in anything. Maybe I'm crazy.

Was he the Marine in that movie? I think he was, yeah. God, that movie really, what the fuck? Okay. the marine in that movie i think he was yeah that movie really what the fuck point is he was promoting a fast and the furious nine or f9 as they will be calling it oh and he was uh doing an interview with a taiwanese broadcaster and here's what he said this is the most horrible thing that anyone has ever said taiwan is the first country that can watch the film. Uh-oh. Now, do you spot the issue with that statement?

That's disinformation. That's disinformation. About Taiwan being a country. China, of course, exploded. Not only the Chinese government got mad, but all their little citizens. How dare you call Taiwan a country? What is wrong with you?

How did they sound when they were getting upset? I would imitate it, but I think I would get in trouble. I don't know how Chinese people get angry. And of course, does John Cena make any sort of, hey, man, I just... He's a rich millionaire. Why doesn't he should stand up for what's right? Shouldn't he stand up and go,

well, they feel that they're a country and I want to respect that. No, i have made a mistake i have one thing which is very very important that i must say i love and respect china and chinese people well thank you mr john cena uh this has been a problem weird apology it's such a point i love chinese people i love hispanics and It's like Trump's. I love Hispanics. And it's like, well, yeah, okay. What does that have to do?

You can't love Chinese people when you say Taiwan's a country. I don't understand this. And this is just a long list of people who China just throws their stupid weight around. I don't know why. Because, I don't know. I guess we want their money. Fast and Furious is bigger than every other property there.

It's bigger than Star Wars. It's bigger than Marvel. I'm sure that whoever's whatever in charge of that movie is like get on your fucking hands and knees because we need Fast and the Furious to come out there.

That's fucked. Would you do that? Get on your hands and knees? Do you wear John Cena? Would you suck China's cock? What would it take for you to say something like that? To make that apology?

Yeah. I mean, if I'm getting paid X billions of dollars. But you're already rich. Yeah. How much more money do you need for everybody? The thing that bugs me about Cena specifically is his demo, his target demographic of stupid Midwestern hillbillies who like wrestling, their lives have been

permanently and irrevocably destroyed for generations, specifically by China, through sending all of their jobs, all of their manufacturing jobs overseas to see the one, like, that's your demo that you're shitting on. And maybe they're too dumb to understand it, but they should be pissed. It's just shitting right in your own, like, do you think he really wants to be adored by China? No. I doubt it. But they should be pissed. It's just shitting right in your own... Do you think he really wants to be adored by China? I doubt it.

I don't know, man. I almost don't blame him as much as I blame the companies behind him. It's almost like he's in a position where they're like, we will completely sabotage you and your career. I'm sure they had the

you will never work in this town again discussion with him. So for me, it's more about the companies that are forcing people into this position. And I actually have a list here of all these companies that just apologized to China, just groveling because they're desperate for these Chinese dollars. Dior, a luxury goods company, they gave a presentation in China that showed a map of China that did not include Taiwan on the map as a part of China. A big apology from them. Of course, the NBA, Houston Rockets general manager. Houston Rockers. The Houston Rockers.

Granny ball. Daryl Morey, he tweeted out, you know i support hong kong whatever else uh refused to apologize for the tweet they ended up suspending nba games for a full year in china you could not televise them and he didn't apologize we know who apologizes on his behalf is of course the great lebron james who uh what did LeBron have to say? We all talk about freedom of speech, says LeBron James. Oh, okay. Oh, we all, are we all in on that conversation, LeBron, you shithead?

But at times, there are ramifications for the negative that can happen when you're not thinking about others and you're only thinking about yourself. See, the evil Daryl Morey're only thinking about yourself see the evil darryl moray was only thinking about himself when he said he had solidarity for the hong kong protesters fighting for democracy i don't want to get in a feud with darryl moray he continues but i believe he wasn't educated on the situation at hand and he hurt people not only financially but emotionally physically and spiritually well physically thank you he hurt physically lebron james uh yeah so these companies just look you're desperate pandering to china to just you want their dollars and i don't know like i know you're a corporation and i know you're soulless but this is like the height of soullessness to just be like

I like shamefully getting on your hands and knees and yes sucking their Chinese cock their tiny tiny

pee pee tiny shiny tiny shiny you know what's the deal with Taiwan anyway what is so great about Taiwan that they well Taiwan is

exiles from you know China used to have whatever their government used to be. It was more of a dictatorship before the... Jesus Christ. Before the... You're not supposed to...

That was a whole other thing. Before the communists took over. So the previous government all fled to Taiwan. Oh. So that's why the communists hate them because they're all the remnants of what used to rule China.

But have now evolved past that and formed into a legitimate democracy. Which China hates even more. We pick up Jerusalem, drop it in Taiwan. Let's get all of these and move all the oil to Taiwan. Let's have one big showdown to end it all. So your problem is what? Kowtowing to my problem is apologizing to china both celebrities and corporations yeah just knock it off it's i think it's worse the celebrities that do it though because they're already so rich yeah why do you

they don't really and you're like you're personally co-signing concentration camps like that's your that's your brand now yeah people are too stupid or they don't they don't really care like they'll follow the pleasure of the art wherever it goes but just you as a man you are co-signing concentration camps just sit with that i just wish you could just be like you say your thing about taiwan and maybe i don't know you don't you didn't you don't like that you said it, but you said it. Just don't, why is he going to apologize? Yeah.

Why can't he just go, listen, you know, they think of themselves as a country and who am I to tell them they're wrong? But the Chinese, they'll always get their way, I guess. They're really amped up about it too. Yeah, it's very weird. Like Jackie Chan is super pro he was like anti-Hong Kong protests it's like what the fuck is your and then

because the propaganda in their country is just hyper nationalistic where they're like China's number one anyone who disagrees with us on anything is racist and evil and we are going to destroy the Taiwanese and then I saw

I also saw Jackie Chan do this thing that rich people do that I fucking hate when they do it. When they're like, well, I'm not going to give my kids any of my money. Yeah.

If they can't make money on their own, they're useless. Then they don't deserve it. I'm like, you motherfucker. Like, you, you lucked out into this.

Do you realize that? Like, do you understand economically how fucked your kids are compared to you secondly uh you're not like you didn't earn you're just like a jackass who made a bunch of jackass movies and stumbled into this uh what is your deal like what is what is everyone's deal with wanting to play god anyway Anyway. Yeah, like, why just denying your kids that? Like, I think they always assume, oh, well, then they'll work harder or whatever else.

Yeah. It's this classic mentality. Maybe they'll just kill you. Yeah, well, wow, wow, accident happened to dad, oh, well. Didn't have time to sign that stupid will. There's these guys who have, you know, there's a lot of guys who have that belief that, like, oh, the only virtue in life is to work hard. And it's like, I don't know, man, there's a lot of guys who just sit on their stocks

and get rich doing nothing. And nobody, nobody really Don't remind me. Has any, yeah. Those guys didn't sell their AMC. A lot of guys just bought AMC

and just sat on it. They're not working too hard. I wish I was dead. I'm just working smart. Okay. Here's my, here's my problem. My next problem.

Women banging psychopaths. Yeah. Like the kind of guys who have a doll in their room that, like that kind of person? Oh,

they're psychopaths. Not me. I realize this is a hypocritical problem. Yeah. Uh, where did I, wait a minute,

I need a, I need an actual thing to pull up here. A stats for you, Vito. Stats. That's what it's all about it's really hard to describe how exhilarating and fun it was talking about rebooting the biggest problem with you after

five after seven years no wait when did we first start that in 2012 it's been eight years since Maddox and I started talking about it uh seven years since we started doing it. Five years since it was over. Has it really been five years since you guys did that thing? Yeah, this is the

fifth year anniversary of this show. Yeah, because you were like, you were really excited like texting me. You're like, this is great. Because so much stuff

that we could have done with that show just didn't get done because Maddox is such a fuck. Yeah. Well, I'm excited. You're only partially a fuck. Yeah. Well, I'm excited. You're only partially a fuck.

Yeah, I'm only partially a... Don't worry, I'll screw it up somehow and then you'll have a whole nother five years to complain about. I'm already figuring out ways to sue you.

To stab me in the back? Yeah, exactly. I'm going to put tits on my back so you don't know if I'm... He called me fat and that is salacious because my body type is...

You know, you got to be proud of who you are. All right, let me load this up. Like Tess Holliday, who has bulimia. Anorexia. What does she have, anorexia? Yeah, she's still fighting it. Does she like used to have anorexia? Because how does she have anorexia now?

Look, those types of questions are disinformation. All you need to know is that she has a very skinny girl's disease. And if you think that's funny, then there's something wrong with you because it's not funny. Anything of any size

can have anorexia. It's actually informative. You're laughing out of ignorance. If you think it's funny that a woman who's 700 pounds and bleeds pancake syrup has anorexia, that's just, you're showing your ignorance by laughing at that. No, I'm laughing at something else. You're laughing at your own dealings with anorexia, I assume.

Thinking about all of the troubles I've been through. With a straight face oh man I'm really my fucking anorexia is acting up today on the yeah

do you think you would mention it National Geographic bring it up but maybe that's her brand I guess attention seeking yeah

feel bad for me she probably was laying was laying on the floor because she can't fit in bed and it struck her as laying in the barn she owns she was laying in the floor because she can't fit in bed and it struck her as

laying in the barn she owns she was laying in the barn and she goes oh my god I've got it like whatever album sales are dipping

and she goes oh my god I got it I'm gonna say I have anorexia she's like all high right and her friends are like no you can't and she's like all high, right? And her friends are like,

no, you can't. No, no, no, no fat bitches ever said that they've had anorexia before. You don't understand. I'll be the first.

Like, well, people aren't going to believe that. Okay. Um, one study says that 39% of hospitalized male psychopaths had consensual sex with female mental health staff. Yeah, I believe that. You believe that?

I absolutely do. Because you know women. I know women and I know psychopaths. And they're promiscuity. Yeah. See, we build this society. We make these laws and these institutions of learning and the economy and these things. But it doesn't matter because women will keep banging psychopaths and cranking out.

So what are we running against here? Well, if they keep doing it, they'll fix them, right? Isn't that the goal? Well, it hasn't worked. They're working at it. How do you stop this? They're just, they're cranking out

new psychopaths left and right, banging psychopaths. Did you know that 40% of cops are psychopaths? Really? It wouldn't surprise you. Women are banging them.

How about that? Yeah, making a whole generation of cops. We spend all this time wondering about China and disinformation and we have this conversation about free speech with LeBron James, but all this time wondering about China and disinformation and we have this conversation about free speech

with LeBron James but all the time we're doing this women are behind our backs banging psychopaths perpetuating a cycle of psychopathy that goes through

the generations ruining any chance of anything. Anything bad. Anything bad that happens there's a psychopath there behind it.

Yeah. Perpetrating evil. Do we need some sort of a... And some woman has banged him. Eugenics solution, perhaps. I don't know what that word means. But that's my problem. If we could just, just for a day, ladies.

Not me. Other psychopaths. Don't bang any of them ones that are criminally insane don't bang them is that so hard to ask there's gotta be a guy that's not

in a mental institution that's not in Arkham Asylum that you could bang today it's all these fucking crime shows man all these crime shows they're getting women all jizzed up in their brains about fucking psychopaths. They're getting all turned horny about murders.

Yep. Well, that was like Ted... That's a good point! What's the murderer? Was it Ted Bundy? The guy who, uh... The serial killer? Yeah, but all these girls were sending him love letters.

They were loving him. Yeah. Sending him discounts on their OnlyFans. Proposing marriage to him. And that guy, what do you call it that guy who killed his kids and his wife and he put them in the oil

refinery no more recently but he's been getting a lot of love letters like a recent guy who got put away Stephen Watts I mean how

what are we supposed to what do we do all this for all this stuff that we made all these institutions that I was talking about women are just going to go that's why the law exists just to prevent us from getting laid because they know if we murder people it just makes us more attractive yeah exactly the man's just trying

to hold us down oh i see why murder is illegal because you get all the pussy you want you can go to a fucking mental institution and still bang there are virgins listening in a contest listening to this show that have less of a chance of getting laid than a psychopath in a mental hospital whereas if you went out and you just slashed a couple women up you'd be drowning in pussy

yeah gym membership too look vote for that problem if you hate women no no no no that's cheating because then everyone's going to vote for it

and this determines who wins the trilogy no That's cheating because then everyone's going to vote for it. No, no, no, no, no, no. And this determines who wins the trilogy. No. That's cheating. Because then you can declare that on anyone and you automatically win

because the whole audience hates women. I did it first. Like, test holiday. Oh, okay. Go ahead. Your turn for your problem. Oh, God.

All right. Here's my problem. I just watched a movie yesterday. Do you know what movie I watched? Cuties? Yeah, exactly. Ten times in a row. I watched Cruella. Oh, God. my problem i just watched a movie yesterday do you know what movie i watched cuties yeah exactly 10 times in a row i watched cruella oh god the edgy disney reboot of the dalmatians franchise yeah about a a young fashion artist who learns to uh you know take charge and also learn to kill

dogs kill puppies yeah basically okay uh so my problem is the edgy reboot. Oh, edgy reboot. Edgy reboots. Now, look, sometimes this works. I think Joker it's not necessarily a reboot, but Joker was already... I don't even think it's a comic book movie. I think they made a movie and then stuck a bunch of, like, Batman shit

on it. Yeah, just to get it along. It was kind of a trick to make their own taxi driver, and they're like, yeah, we'll just say it it along. It was kind of a trick to make their own taxi driver. And they're like, yeah, we'll just say it's Joker. It doesn't really matter. Like at the end of Taxi Driver,

he drove Bruce Wayne to where he got or whatever, to that theater. Like, oh my God! Batman Taxi Driver! Wow! But I think

because Joker happened and it made money, now these studios are starting to go, oh, we need dark. We need to darkify our movies and do that sort of thing

so we get Cruella the origin of a dog murderer the new G.I. Joe is going to be just everybody chopping each other's head off or whatever else oh really?

yeah yeah wasn't Transformers kind of dark? well that's the thing they've always that's the first one I'm like this is a little

fucking okay yeah all I came for was the wop w wop, wop, wop sound. Yeah, they've taken a lot of the fun out of this stuff. Like Man of Steel, remember he snaps Zod's neck at the end? You're like, can't you just zap him into the Phantom Zone with a stupid laser gun and have fun like a regular Superman movie? Yeah, like Marvel.

Yeah, exactly. Well, kind of like Marvel. Yeah, it is. Yeah. It's campy and stupid. But, you know the dc fans they want it dark uh but i think where it's gotten worse is uh in tv are you the show riverdale the uh the archie archie the dark archie oh man now i've never watched

riverdale but i real quick when it gets raped gets raped. Yeah, kind of. There's, there's. Oh, really? Well, not exactly. I wrote down some of the plot points. Archie is fucking Miss Grundy. Remember the old lady? Okay, that's enough.

That's enough plot points. Jughead joins a gang after his father gets framed for murder. Is it a white supremacy gang? Something like that. Betty helps bury a body while Archie's dad gets shot at Pop's Malt Shop.

Seems unnecessary, right? Isn't this a little too much? But you know what the worst one is, Dick? What's the worst one? I know you've seen this and I know you've heard about this. What is it? The planned Powerpuff Girls reboot.

I saw a little bit about that. Yeah. Now, Powerpuff Girls reboot. Oh, I saw a little bit about that. Yeah. Now, Powerpuff Girls, if you might remember, was a show that was about- Sugar, Spice, and Ingredient X or something. It was about adorable six-year-old crime-fighting superheroes who were created, yes, from a scientific concoction. Went on fun, colorful adventures. It was a franchise for children. The Powerpuff Girls reboot features the lead character Blossom killing Mojo Jojo,

the adorable monkey villain from the original. It also, the Powerpuff Girls cartoon exists. Is it a computer CG? Like she's killing a monkey? They've made him into a human this time around. Oh, that's not appropriate at all. I guess they didn't want to spend money on making killing a monkey They've made him into a human this time around Oh that's not appropriate at all I guess they didn't want to spend money on making it a monkey They're just like yeah she just kills a guy

Isn't it great that the six year old killed a guy Also in their universe The Powerpuff Girls cartoon exists Like the cartoon we have I hate when they do that Oh god I hate that shit But here's what makes it the worst Is that what do you call it

Buttercup in the reboot is a black girl. Oh, that's horrible. Vito, you're right. That's the worst part. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. But in the cartoon, she's still white. Based. So they're saying, and then at some point in the script, she says specifically, that cartoon whitewashed me.

So in the Powerpuff Girls live action universe, the Powerpuff show that you know and maybe love is racist in that universe. And then real quick, I have just a little piece of the script. It's really like crass lesbian humor.

Well, I have a couple things. Let's see. So Bubbles The best kind of humor. They're joking about Bubbles having a sex tape. At one point they say, wake up or we're going to leak your nudes. This is great that these formerly six-year-old characters are talking about this.

And then the weirdest part is Blossom goes upstairs to check on Buttercup, who she finds in bed with her lesbian lover and then she says oh don't worry we're just finishing up aren't we finishing up? and then the lesbian lover says

yeah I think six orgasms is enough for one day yeah isn't it great that you're that's typical lesbian sex they don't know when it's over because there's no guy

there to come isn't it great that a children's cartoon has been edgified where we now get to learn that our favorite six-year-old crime-fighting superheroes have grown up and are having multiple orgasms, making sex tapes, and murdering people? Who is this for?

I don't know! Did you get the whole script? Yeah, I have the whole script, actually. Somebody sent it to me. I like the powerpuff girls. I wanted to do a dramatic reading if we can get a bunch of people. That would be fun. That would be good. But yeah,

it's unnecessary. Leave franchise... As I've said, you want to do a reimagining of something? You can just make your own franchise. You look at The Boys or Invincible. It's like, oh, you don't have to use Superman. You don't have to use the Powerpuff Girls. Just make

your own version. Just make like an analog of them. Yeah, and it's much more interesting. I mean, but it's, again, just cynical marketing. Like, oh, well, we want to sell Powerpuff Girls merchandise. Oh, people know their names so we can sell pop figures more easily. It's like, dude, no, just be like a little tiny bit creative. Make it like angry lesbian teen girl squad. Don't be so sexual about everything.

Right. Fuck. Like, Greg the Bunny had a little bit of sex in it. It was funny. Yeah. Even that happy time murder. This is a little too much sex for my taste. And I like puppets.

You know what I mean? Listening to a bunch of, I don't know, former girl superheroes talk about, ugh, my sex tape. Ugh, my vagina. Ugh, I just fucked my girlfriend. Like, yeah, all right. Got it. You're on the edge. Like, yeah, all right. Got it.

You're on the edge. You're living on the edge. I murdered a monkey and now I fuck ladies. Like, yeah, all right. Cool. Good work. Anything else going on there? Yeah.

So the edgy reboot. They're taking our edge. Yeah. That's our culture. It's not even edgy. It's just still edgy. Yeah. Edgy.

Edgy. I mean, I guess that word never really meant anything, but there was always like... It means too far. Like, ah, you took it too far. Well, you think of like Batman the Dark Knight. You remember that comic

when Frank Miller was like, what if Batman was kind of a badass and whatever else? You're like, oh, this is actually kind of cool and like an independent artist making a whole thing. Kind of set up the template

for, you know, today's modern edgy Batman or whatever. It's cool when it's coming from a place of like... A man. Honesty. Yeah. It's cool when it's coming from a place of honesty. It's cool when a man's doing it. To be fair, the Powerpuff Girls reboot was written by a woman, and I'm pretty sure Cruella was also written by a woman.

Actually, Riverdale's probably written by a bunch of women because I can't imagine any man giving a shit about Archie. How would you reboot the Powerpuff Girls? Either A, I would not call it the Powerpuff Girls? Either A, I would not call it the Powerpuff Girls as I discussed or B,

you can't do it. If you want to do it as live action, it's got to be like colorful fun. You can't talk about them having sex and murdering people.

It doesn't work. It's weird. It's like when you see those ads like on porn sites and it's like the Simpsons fucking, you're like, come on. and it's like the simpsons fucking you're like come on yeah like the simpsons are already my brain don't go don't go in my brain all the way back to when i was 10 years old and make it sexual it is it annoys me i know why you're

doing it and it's it's making me upset it's just really baffling because you're like okay why did people like the original and it's like oh because it was like fun and colorful and you know kind of funny or whatever else it's like okay well let's do zero of that let's do the opposite yeah let's do the exact opposite and you're like well then who is it for people who didn't like the power of girls and are now like yeah now it's like not anything like what i like what other people i don't know who it's for. It's very confusing. I feel like most movies

are written for the people writing them. Luckily, they have apparently tossed out this script. I think they actually finished filming a pilot and they're like,

this is unwatchable and they're going to try again. Well, those are the problems going around. What do we have? Quote disinformation. Vote for mine

if you hate women, by the way. Women writers. Because they're just, because they're terrible. And mine actually makes more sense. Are we going to end all our problems with that? I think we're going to end all our problems with that. No, just once.

That's that one. Mine was appropriate to the context and the plot. I think mine was appropriate. Okay. Disinformation. That's mine. appropriate. Okay. Disinformation. That's mine. Yes. Apologizing to China.

The idea that the government controls all of... Oh, what is yours? Apologizing to China. Oh, that's what it's called? All right. Well, I'm trying. Not very snappy.

Hold on. Hold on. Think about it. Something about apologizing to China. Well, Chinese apologize. Chinese apologies. Chinese.

You have to apologize. Chinese aporages, probably. Apor Chinese apologize. Chinese apologies. Chinese. You have to apologize in Chinese? Chinese aporages, probably. That's better. Apologies. Oh, Chinese aporages. So powerful. I don't know.

That's not funny. I don't know what he's talking about. That's too far. This is how you get canceled. That's what they got Shane Gillis on. Powerpuff Girls for you. That's what they got

Shane Gillis on. That guy who got that SNL job. He did a voice? Yeah, they got from his podcast. He went, you ever go to like an Asian place for you. Yeah, that's what they got Shane Gillis on, that guy who got that SNL job. He did a voice? Yeah, they got, from his podcast, he went, you ever go to like an Asian place, and you're like, oh, tasty neuterer. That's it?

Yeah, he was like, my girlfriend would order, and she's like, oh, I want a neuterer. And he would be like, no, you can't say that here. Was his like exact quote, was him doing his girlfriend saying it. Existing in the normal world is so, was such a stupid waste of time. Yeah.

Like, can you imagine? I cannot imagine stopping and not saying shit like that every day, all day. It's such a goddamn waste. Everything that we have and we made is just squandered on these fucking midwits. I hate it. I hate it. Absolutely hate it.

Every day. This is why comedy is like, if you try to watch the comedy. Why do you think SNL is unwatchable? Because nobody on it is funny. Yeah. That's why. And you almost had a guy like Shane Gillis who seems like a pretty funny guy. But he made one joke that offended a couple people.

And now you got what? Elon Musk dressed as Wario or whatever the fuck that was. I don't even know what's going on. Chinese apologies. What was my other one? Psychopath women. Women banging psychopaths.

Not psychopath women. Women banging psychopaths and your last one was gritty reboots. I'd say edgy reboots. Oh, edgy. Okay. Grit is like a little. Yeah.

Yeah. Do they get to the bottom of why Cruella de Vil murders puppies? You know what? You know what's weird? Like the movie kind of sidesteps it. Because it's pretty dark. Yeah, because they want you to like think that like you're supposed to come away from it like she's the sympathetic character. And you're like, so does this exist in a universe where she's never gonna actually kill dogs?

Are you setting up for a sequel where she's gonna learn to kill dogs? There's one fake out where you think maybe she killed dogs, but then you're like, nah, she didn't, because the filmmakers know that she didn't, and then they revealed that, of course, she didn't. Do you have any more comments about female writers? I love

all women, especially writers. I think they just haven't been given opportunities because men like Vito... No, there's some good female filmmakers and writers out there for sure. There's some good ones. Alright. It's just a lot of them are diversity hires who just screw the pooch.

We're nodding over on the corner. We're getting a nod. Like Rick and Morty. Yeah nod like Rick and Morty yeah like Rick was destroyed by destroyed by well that's

some people believe that I don't know if that's true it fell look statistically yeah if you want to get funny writers

who are obsessed with the rules of sci-fi it's gonna be a guy right and that's what kind of makes the show work is that you have to like sci-fi, it's going to be a guy. Right. And that's what kind of makes the show work.

Is that... You have to... Like, sci-fi is so structured and rigid. Yeah. It has to be... You have to be obsessed with it. You have to have rules and you have to adhere to the rules because it's so interesting.

So, going outside of the formula on... Even slightly, I think you're asking for it. All right, let's do some comments. Remember, go to patreon.com slash thedickshow to vote on this. It's open. You don't have to pay.com slash the dick show to vote yes on this it's open you don't have to pay

it's public and patreon.com slash the veto show if you'd like to see more you know I'm tempted to just tell the new the new website where people can go vote

is it ready is the site ready it'll be ready by the time this is up it's up to you man it's biggestproblem.show oh oh oh yeah interesting biggestproblem.show oh oh oh yeah

interesting biggestproblem.show so the I'm assuming you're gonna get the money you're assuming it's gonna happen yeah

it's only 500 bucks I count my yeah 500 bucks come on 500 bucks if you had AMC toss 500 bucks to Vito

toss 5 bucks cause it's not like you the one who doesn't work on anything because he believes it. He's got to have money up front. I would do it.

I'm like, look. Okay. I just, it gives me a little motivation. I'm not being a jerk. Motivation. Jesus Christ. Jimothy says,

don't make it a monthly bonus show. Make it its own show. We will. We'll have a separate feed and everything. Kevin McAllister says, a monthly bonus to the biggest problem

in the universe would be sick. Fat brain is a huge problem. At least alcoholics can admit that they convince themselves to drink more through mental gymnastics.

Yeah. I've never said, oh, actually, it's the doctors that are wrong about liquor. It's totally healthy to drink this much

and act like a jackass and abuse people who are close to me because of drinking. That's totally healthy. I'm not an alcoholic. I just have big liver. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Maybe these people need F.A.

Fatty's Anonymous. That's a good rip. So you have to go and say, Hi, I'm Tess Holliday and I'm fat. Do you really have to say it? Can't you just stand in the front of the room at that point? You really got to say, I'm fat. You got to stand 30 feet away.

You may not have noticed. I know exactly how it went when she said, I'm going to fucking say I'm anorexic. You really picture her smoking a blunt. She's listening to Jerry when she said I'm gonna fucking say I'm anorexic you really picture her smoking a blunt she's listening to Garcia Baker Street

oh okay Jerry Rafferty said I got it I got it I'm saying I'm fucking anorexic man

it got her at least what like a week of press but she can use it forever she can go talk she can go to anorexia convention.

Bum, bum, bum. Lumber up to the stage and say, like you, I am too suffering from anorexia. Equal Robocops. Is the metric system, oh God. Fucking metric system.

See, a lot of people took my side on this one. Yeah, idiots. A lot of people not measuring shit. A lot of people who don't measure shit either. Yeah, idiots. A lot of people not measuring shit. A lot of people who don't measure shit either. No, no, no. Because I did a little more research. It's easier because you use decimal places instead of fractions.

So instead of needing 5 16ths of wood. Tell me more. Oh, whatever. I didn't prepare. Using 5 16ths of wood? Because it's like a 2x4? I guess. I can't do it in five sixteenths of wood? Because it's like a two by four? I guess. I don't, I can't do it in my head. Shut up.

Stop trying to catch me off guard with math. The point is that like, you can just shift the decimal place to go up or down by tens. You don't have to like. Stop staring at it. What tens do you want to go up? That's what a European weirdo should be. No, because centimeters, millimeters, like it all. What's the next one?

Foot, yard. You have to like remember. Three feet to a. How many fucking times. Okay, and then how many yards are in a mile? A thousand, two hundred. I don't know. Yeah, you don't know because you can't just go up by a thing.

Why would I need to do that? Because sometimes it's helpful depending on what you're doing. Oh, yeah. My parents' house is about 30 miles away. Well, what is that in yards? Somebody back me up on this. Somebody in the comments. You know what I'm talking about.

The metric system is useful for converting from cubic length to volume. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. So, you know. Right there. If you need to convert a cubic length. Do you even know what a cubic length is? Of course I do.

One cubic centimeter is one milliliter. Case cracked. There you go. That explains why the whole country should shift to this goofy ball measuring system. It makes perfect sense. Daniel Atwater, lack of bidets hit home until Vito started talking about metric shit I didn't you look

you you made that into a thing I hate metric the US adopted the metric system since the 1890s and we teach

SI SI units in schools oh no our street signs say miles per hour who cares get fucked

what do you think about that? I wish it had cubic liters per hour. I think that would be more helpful. Every street sign should be different. Yeah.

It has cubic liters. 14,000 cubic liters per decimal place. Per decimal place. Yeah, if it's so easy to convert,

you should just know what it's always talking about. Cops would love it, actually. Let me see if you're Oh yeah okay good um uh herb beta patched fahrenheit is better than celsius oh this was another fucking debate too celsius is so dumb scientists don't even use it for math they use kelvin because celsius is really gay oh Oh yeah, I think that makes sense. Someone was touting Celsius too. Why has everything got to be like

reinvented for you guys? Why do you never ask like why do what we have, why do we use it? It's always, well, this is fucked. Let's use a new system. Yeah. Just hold on. Just ask, why do we use this system?

First, never mind. What am I even talking about? Smashing penapes. Just an opposing view to dicks and an example that he can relate to. I always viewed the people chugging dildos and wearing fetish wear to pride parades as kind of being to pride what the overly pro-N-word guys are to free speech. This is a good point. You've got people on one side advocating for or celebrating shit that most people probably think is reasonable. And then another group trying to latch onto that to push

things that are tangentially related, but that aren't really important. And they're going to be poisoning the well with people who would otherwise be perceptive. Perceptive to your cause? Yeah, that's not the correct word. Come on, buddy. Pull it together. Jesus. Receptive, probably. I also saw it as people just being kind of dicks and talking, taking something that's

about one thing and trying to make it their own thing instead for attention but no the issue though is that those guys have existed since the dawn of pride it's not like they

suddenly latched onto it the sex people yeah that's always been a part of it I feel I think that he's right because I always say

like there's a huge contention of people who are on the free speech side who just want to say the n-word, but then lose their minds when any, like when lolly con stuff is brought up. And it's like, well, you can't really, I mean, you guys just can't bitch about, you can't say the N-word, and these other guys can't do their free speech thing.

It's speech to speech no matter what. They do. The N-word people hurt the free speech cause a lot, considerably. And they're also, I have this one guy, because I'm always like, dude, I'm so about free speech. Like, it's so important, whatever else. And he goes, yeah, but you banned me from your Discord for spamming the N-word hundreds of times. So you can't call yourself. I wish I could ban you from Earth, man.

He's like, so you can't say you're actually in favor of free speech. And I'm like, that's not a free speech issue. That's just you're annoying and spamming my chat with stuff I don't like. Like, it's my... Yeah. Just because I like free speech doesn't mean in my house I have to let you call my wife a whore. Like, I can set my own personal limits. Your imaginary wife?

Well, yeah. She's got purple fingers and a metal endoskeleton. Okay. But she's doing quite well. However, I will say, when the free speech people enjoy the same protected class rights that gays have, which is like listing number one

on job applications. If you're gay, we're going to hire you over everybody else. Fuck everybody else. As soon as the free speech people are, if you support free speech, then I'll relax. Then it's like, okay, and we're going nuts. But I don't think pride needs more.

I think they're as accepted as you can get. I think they're even valued. Right. Right? There's a premium on being gay. The leather whatever people, the fetish people are not holding any gay anything back. Like the acceptance has happened. Yeah, you're accepted.

It's not going anywhere. Don't worry. They figured out that you are a valuable marketing block from which they can make money. So white women love gays. Yeah. Don't worry about it. You'll be fine.

It's the other guys that need to. As long as you're allies with the white women, you're going to be good. They'll get stuff done on your behalf. Yeah. Plus, I think it's like, it's weird to see like people getting involved in the gay identity that are using it for politics

because they think it's like left. They consider it left wing. They're like, well, we got to keep, make this kids friendly. So we get the kids in there and teach them about tolerance. And it's just like, this is about

dicks in the butts. It's not about, keep all your politics fucking in the bedroom, buddy. It's complicated, man. Anyway, Matt Cook,

dick is an idiot. I built my deck using the metric system and it was 10 times easier than using Imperial. All I needed was my trusty.000013 kilometer drill bit and.0048 kilometer planks to cut down and assemble. I forgot a decimal place at one point

and drilled a hole as big as a hubcap. But I threw some builder's bog in there and it was good as new. Easy. All right. So he's on your side. No. Okay.

I get it. Hey man, my birthday is this week. Can I get a picture or a video of you flipping me off and telling me to go fuck myself?

Oh, I didn't write his name down. I copied his email but I didn't write. Well, sorry buddy. Have to send a cameo later. Yeah.

Would you get on cameo? No. I don't. Honestly, I'm better than that. I was listening to. I got flat out I'm not gonna just say shit

cause you paid me some money to do it uh I never will I was listening to who are these podcasts and I guess High Pitch Eric

from the Hard Stern Show just makes like tens of thousands of dollars just making cameos really yeah good for him yeah

well what else is he gonna do um let's see here. Nobody would want my cameo. I don't want my cameo. I don't want my cameo. Fat brain is the biggest

problem in the universe. Jel Haydick I've been loving these reboot episodes. This is the last one unless Vito gets his money. This is our edgy reboot. Yeah.

The monthly bonus episode idea you posted about on Twitter sounds great. As a Patronian I'm completely in favor of gatekeeping the best content from the poor and the stupid. About your problem of fat brain, I might have found something interesting in this article related to it.

The gist of it is that being a fatty fat fat rolling around actively lowers blood flow into your brain. And the chronic inflammation causes a slow shrinkage of the areas that are used for memory and learning. Wait, really? I mean, it could be disinformation. That doesn't sound, yeah, that doesn't sound, I hope not. You got some fat brain going in your head right now, Vito. I'm all worried. I don't know.

It's definitely bad. I don't have fat brain. it's definitely bad I don't have fat brain uh eBay bans adult games from Franger the hentai ban coming to the USA soon

we live in hell eBay bans sexually explicit games is that true I think they banned all or like they're banning a lot of

explicit content let's see that's awesome I love living in a Christian caliphate but you know what it is a lot of it is actually like this weird

like cause it's the lolly thing is what it comes down to it's like they can't it's crazy it's like maybe the characters are underage

we can't really tell and we're not sure if it's legal or not and we're not gonna deal like it might be legal in some countries but what if an eBay seller sends it to you know

Canada which is more strict about stuff like that? But yeah, look, it's not just games. eBay will officially be implementing a ban on adults-only video games as part of a larger policy update prohibiting the listing of sexually explicit content like movies, magazines, anime, and more. Okay, so it's not just games. It's DVDs, magazines, domain names.

Oh, what the hell? How can you have a porno domain name? It's like a sentence. Well, you remember they have the.xxx ones? How hot can a domain name be? Oh, boy! Right? Yeah, no.

That's insane. I mean, it's not to get... Yeah, it makes sense. Oh, pornography. All right. Well, we're banning those sexy domain names, too. What? All right.

No laser... No sexually explicit laser discs? Well, now I'm fucked. There goes my... Come on! All the best porns on laser discs. Broadly speaking, this essentially bans all sexually explicit pornographic video games.

What if I buy, what if I sell a quilt that's just for masturbating? Is that okay? You can only use this thing for masturbating only. An Afghan. There's a special large hole

in the middle. While still allowing titles like the modern Mortal Kombat. Oh, I hate when they do that. Oh, they banned all porno. But they still allow, like, would you just shut up? Yeah, because they'll take that next. They're banning those too, you know?

What do you think, you're going to catch them out? They're going to go, oh shit, we still have Mortal Kombat on there. Guess we better let all the porno stuff back on. Assholes. No VCDs either. All my favorite formats. Huh. All right.

Well, that sucks. I can't wait till we just move to the blockchain entirely. We can stop thinking about these middleweight problems. Oh, God.

We can let all the dumb fucks have their banking system. They can run it into the ground we can just spend we can give each other cryptocurrency like kings that is a really good argument for cryptocurrency that they're now stuff that has been legal to purchase for since the inception of ebay how old's ebay at this point 20 years 20 years yeah maybe more and now for some reason you think it would be like going in the opposite direction there We just found out that they're selling porno on our... Oh, my God.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Pump the brakes. I really want to know if they're worried about some sort of legal trouble or like payment process. Because that's what took down Pornhub, right? Was like that the payment processors were like, we're going to stop processing payments unless you verify every single person who's on there or whatever else.

So, Obama made choke point. The Patriot Act is the original sin that destroys all banking and payment processing as it pertains to free speech and expression in economy because it makes you check for things like money laundering. And I think, no, just money laundering. Money laundering and terrorism. So the money laundering is impossible for banks to stop because they're doing it, number one.

So you're asking them to stop some amount of their regular business. Like, money doesn't care about the law. It just is an abstraction of value. It floats around. And a lot of illegal things are very valuable. There's no like, well, oh gosh, you guys didn't stop that a billion dollars of money laundering for illicit things? Why not?

I feel like that's self-evident right there. And hate, no, no, no. What was the other one I said? And terrorism. Yeah. But now we can define terrorism as anything. Capital, self-guided tour on January 6th. Self-guided tour.

Terrorism, white supremacy, terrorism, and Operation Chokepoint, which was stopping firearms sales, hate speech, and one other big one. Trump overturned that, but the people who were hired to keep banks in compliance with Operation Chokepoint

are still there, are still operating under the same directives mentally. Like you can't make that big of a change in four years. And Biden is 100% bringing it back with a vengeance. What are the rules?

They sound like hate speech that you can't... If you're a bank and you do hate speech, you're not FDIC insurable. That's why i'm not allowed to process credit cards on earth because of that because of that that's such insanity yeah because is hate speech even defined under the law no it has no it has no definition because like terror literally the soviet union invented it and forced uh everybody else after world war ii and forced everybody else after World War II

and forced everybody who signed up the treaty to incorporate hate speech into their, like whatever, into their doctrines because they used it specifically to stamp out political dissent. And that's what we're moving into. Operation Chokepoint Part 2,

which is going to include disinformation as well. Anyway, they're probably just getting in front of it. Anti-ban. All right. I'm looking forward to my pod. Are you? Quiet, quiet pod. Prison rage story.

CCCC. Hey, Dick. Call me Johnny Foreskin. Okay. Here's a prison rage for you. My best friend is in his final year of his four-year prison sentence. Here in Australia, if you're on good behavior, they let you out of prison once a month to visit friends and family in your final year.

Oh, from seven to seven. What a nightmare. One day? If prison wasn't bad enough, they make you hang out with your fucking family for 12 hours. Not even like half an hour. I gotta go, honey, I gotta go. Back to prison prison you know now you're here for 12 more hours not only are you here for 12 hours but you have to get up at

7 a.m or else you don't really love your kids as much as the big poker games tonight i gotta get back make it 10 to 10 yeah like come on when do we get out of prison? Seven in the morning. Oh, awesome. So if I show up at 8.05, I fucked up. So we cooked him a big feast full of all the foods he hasn't had in three years, although he's not allowed to drink alcohol during these days home. He really loved eating the barbecue and cakes we made for him. Aw, cakes.

Here's the rage. When he went back to prison that night, he failed his piss test. Aw, cakes. Here's the rage. When he went back to prison that night, he failed his piss test. Oh, no. He tested positive for opiates, although he was

completely sober that entire day and didn't take any drugs. It turns out one of the family members baked him a cake with poppy seeds in it. The prison said...

It's like Seinfeld. Mm, yeah. They didn't watch Seinfeld. The prison said they's like Seinfeld. They didn't watch Seinfeld. The prison said they would send his piss to the lab to run further tests but in the meantime he's lost all of his good behavior privileges. I don't think the prison is going to send the piss anywhere. I don't think they give

a fuck. Go fuck yourself. I don't make or eat any cakes with poppy seeds. And don't eat any cakes with poppy seeds. I guess you don't think about it but maybe they don't have Seinfeld in Australia. Yeah, but even outside of Seinfeld. They got Seinfeld. People have known that thing.

Australia. Seinfeld. Seinfeld. Oi, we gonna watch Seinfeld tonight. Seinfeld. Then get in the uke. Get on down to Bendigo. Ba-darn-darn, like a didgeridoo.

That's stupid. Dingo baby. a didgeridoo. That's stupid. Dingo baby. James B. says, metric system. Oh, my God. People are mad at you, I think. Here's a headline for the last episode. Software engineer complains that people who don't measure things

don't get to complain about the measurement system. Scientists and engineers who actually do measure things. Don't do that voice. Scientists and engineers who actually do measure things like civil, mechanical, and chemical engineers prefer metric. Oh, there you go. So I guess I just have a more science-minded brain. Yeah.

Yeah. That's what happened. I think that's what it is. Yeah. That's what it is, right. Yeah. Yeah. That's what happened. I think that's what it is, yeah. That's what it is, right? Yeah. Many Americans consider themselves a scientist, but they just didn't have the proper encouragement.

If they had had the metric system, we'd have a lot more scientists. You have to use both to do engineering in America. Mm. Well, because all the formulas we use are in metric SI units. Remember that time NASA crashed an orbiter into Mars because they used both metric and imperial

and fucked up the conversions? That must have been the best day in the lives of these metric people. They fucked up that thing. Do you know they, so when they launched that thing, because people say it was a European to American thing, and that's why it messed up. It wasn't.

It was American to American thing. Like Northrop Grumman or whoever built it made it in newtons or pounds per square inch or something, which they would never do. They just did it wrong. And then as it was going to Mars, they had to recorrect the whatever rockets like 14 times what is a normal amount of corrections in flight

and then nobody thought, gosh, we should look at why we had to correct this thing 14 times more, 20 times more than we thought. No, they didn't. Fuck it. And then after the fact, they figured't. They just, ah, fuck it. And then after the fact, they figured it out?

After the fact, yeah. There's ways metric makes things easier for everyday people, too. Oh. One advantage is that the metric is a decimal. Yup! That's what I'm talking about. Go on.

I believe you has more to say yeah then you could have like a .5 socks if you lose one yeah of your pair yeah

like the Hindu Arabic numerals we use nobody who works with drywall knows their 12x tables but everyone can cover

the last two digits with their thumb the fuck does that mean? It means if you're shifting decimals, you can just get rid of some zeros. You use your thumb to do drywall? I don't know what he's saying. Now that I think about it.

The correlation... I still remember it's on the piece of paper with the measurements he's covering up the zeros. What the fuck are you covering up with your thumb? Covering up zeros. Did you just ignore them with your mind? Why do you have to cover them up with your thumb? Covering up. With zeros. Did you just ignore them with your mind? Why do you got to cover them up with your thumb? Builders can calculate how much concrete they need to fill something. Concrete's measured in yards. Not in other countries.

Yes, it is. It's 10 cubic yards of fucking. You measure concrete in trucks. How many trucks do I need? How many cubic centiliters do I need of concrete? Excuse me, Joe Concrete? I need 47.5 cubic deciliters. How many trucks do you want?

Well, how much cement is in one truck? 10 cubic yards, give or take an entire yard. Oh, hold on. I need to go figure this out like a normal person. A normal person. All these arguments make perfect sense to me. I guess, again, just my science brain. Ordered a lot of concrete, have you?

Oh, yeah. A farmer can work out how much water or diesel is left in a tank by measuring the diameter and using a dipstick. Oh, that just sounds convenient. Measuring the fucking diameter. A farmer is out there. All right. A truck driver can work out their payload easily when hauling liquids. If you're using pesticide on a farm, you'll have an

application rate of liters per hectare. Isn't hectare... Isn't that like... I don't know. Acres? And that's far easier

to convert into a flow rate. I want to kick this guy's ass. Sorry. I'm just asking for it. All right. Thank you for your letter.

I think that's the show. Thank you for your letter. Vito, plug all your stuff. YouTube.com slash Vito. And of course, if you want more Biggest Problem. If you want the biggest problem, what do you think, Johnny?

Fucking go subscribe to Vito, I guess. Patreon.com slash... It's not strong-arming you. It's strong-arming. It's holding people for ransom. No, I think it's extortion, actually. It's a helpful donation to support a struggling comedian.

Oh, struggling. Yeah, you helpful donation to support a struggling comedian. Oh, struggling. Yeah. Yeah, you're struggling like that. Did you see that? Okay, Boomer chick has like a $2 million house. Yeah, well, I ain't her because I ain't going to get up in any,

you ain't going to see my tits flopping around singing about Bernie Sanders. This is all I have. Patreon.com slash The Vito Show. Thank you for everyone's support. I appreciate it. That bitch had a $2 million house. How did she make that much money

in like, I don't know, like two years. I wonder that too. I don't believe, I don't, she was funded by a bunch of, is she renting it

or did she actually buy it? I don't know. I don't think she bought that house. But then she said that, eat the rich. When she said eat the rich, it meant billionaires. Right,

not millionaires like her. Does she have like an OnlyFans where she's getting like, I mean, I'm sure she has an OnlyFans. She's getting her tits out? Is that what you're going to say? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but she's probably making like...

Dirty. She looks like a clown. I don't think she's very attractive, to be honest, and not just because of her politics. But that's kind of the thing with OnlyFans. Don't you... She's too made up.

I can't tell what's... I can't tell what's under there. There's so much makeup, I can't tell what's going on. I think the OnlyFans girls who make more money are probably the ones who are a little

not like unattainable attractive they're all unattainable yeah but the guys who like go to them they're not gonna fuck you the guys who sign up are like

oh I might have a chance yeah they're definitely not gonna fuck you I think there's like this illusion though where you're like oh if she just hung out with me

oh yeah she would realize we're perfect for each other. Right. Just be more of a psychopath and then she'll date you. Go kill someone. No kidding.

Detransition stats. I don't know what you're talking about then. That's disinformation. I'm sure that's disinformation. Did you see 60 Minutes did a whole detransitioning? Did they really?

Special. Yeah. What did they say? They talked to some people who detransitioned. Did they really? Special, yeah. What did they say? They talked to some people who detransitioned, one of which was like, I was on hormones for three months

before they gave me permission to cut off my testicles. And I now deeply regret every, yeah. Wow. And he's like, my life is now ruined. Yeah.

How good was your life? Ruined. Come on. Maybe it's ruined the Mona Lisa over here. Fucking. yeah Clyde and then Clyde issued a statement ruined come on maybe it's fucking ruined the Mona Lisa over here but then Clyde was very mad that they posted that the 60 minutes

I was like I can't believe 60 minutes actually I did that yeah the detransition people get a lot of shit yeah they're seen as traitors it's crazy I have white women

throwing a fit about lesbians here. People hate lesbians now, huh? Women. Oh, yeah. All these white brides. Pride month begins with this from somewhere. Instagram. The white women at the Sacramento hotel pool were pissed that a queer black woman was kissing her girlfriend in public because there was children present.

They were shamed. So these white ladies threw, oh my God. Oh wow. She's whipping off the camera. This is peak white women. This is multiple white women. It's a Starbucks cup? It's a murder of white women.

They're going to get all their underarms flopping and cause a seismic disturbance or a weather disturbance. Wow, she's really going off. Because there were kids present. Kids should be illegal. I really want to kick kids out of most spaces. Eliminate the age of consent so you can pick a fight or do whatever you want to any kid. That'll solve a lot of problems

oh we can't take our kids out that guy Dick Masters is gonna come out and start punching there's no longer any distinction between minors and adults

you can hit any kid you want oh my god a day with no fucking kids what a paradise you can walk around you don't even have to zip up your fly anymore just walk out of the bathroom

oh you know your fly's down yeah cause there's no kids around I don't fucking care I mean you really can't do that now girls kissing girls

I don't think women going around topless guys wearing puppy suits or whatever the fuck they were doing at pride god I fucking hate kids if you have kids

if you have kids at home, wake them up and let them hear what I'm saying. You have ruined the world. You kids have ruined the world because you're such fragile little pussies. You can't even see two women kissing. Oh my God, two women kissing. I'm fucking losing it.

I'm selling all my AMC. And you contribute nothing. Nothing. Nothing. All your drawings are shit. I am the Maddox of the new show. Yeah, you're stealing a Maddox. God!

You're just so obnoxious. It's like, what are your parents in love with you? Are they banging you that they're so fucking worried about your well-being all the fucking time oh man in 10 000 oh kids today versus 10 000 years ago like i gotta go i hope you don't get murdered while i'm out hunting for food or whatever gathering fucking eggplants or something stay here shut the fuck up or you're gonna get eaten by a wolf I mean, they can't see two women kissing. That's horrible. God.

Caring about your own, caring about your kids so fucking much and expecting anybody else to do it. Fucking kids. I'm going to make out with guys. If I ever see a kid, I'll start making out with guys immediately. To try and horrify them into submission.

For whatever, yeah. Yeah, just to fuck with their parents. I'm going to come at you like a heat-seeking mouth. There should just be a social contract where all parents realize, like, if you have kids in a situation, you're in the wrong automatically. You're disgusting. You're degenerate. You mixed up all your juices together and shat out some of these fucking kids that are now everyone's problem because you're going to be dead before they're gone. Now we have to figure out what to do

with this useless middle-wit fuck that you're not going to train to do anything right. Coding? What's that? Load them up on self-esteem and drugs and turn them loose onto the world that we have to deal with. Thank you very much.

Just sit them in front of Minecraft until they get autism and then everybody else is prone. Why are these two girls kissing in front of, there are children present. Yeah, well, they shouldn't be. Right. Maybe the next COVID that kills kids instead of old people, we can let that one run rampant.

Maybe there's a scarlet fever part two that we could let run across the world and wipe out everyone under 18. Shit. And we could build a wall out of them. It'll be useful for one. God. Can we just normalize cages for children?

I mean. Yeah. Yeah. I see what's going on at the border. And they're like, we got kids in cages. I'm like Yeah. Yeah. I see what's going on at the border and they're like, we got kids in cages. I'm like,

can we get more kids? Can we put all the kids in cages? They have Nintendos and shit there too. Get rid of them. Is there something we can file to get rid of those Nintendos

that those kids have in the cages in the border? Because they might see girls kissing in their Nintendos. They might get attracted to Princess Peach. Yep. Yeah. Ugh. People in their Nintendos. They might get attracted to Princess Peach. Yep.

Yeah. Ugh. People ain't fucking kids. Speaking of disinformation, if you beat the game 500 times, she gets naked. Peach? Yeah. Does? Very common.

And then you fight a robot. Then you fight a robot version of yourself. Kids. Shadow robot version. Other people's kids. The reasons we can't have any. If you have children, you owe everyone an apology. If you ever used your child

as an excuse to stop people from having a good time, you're the worst human being. Well, you have to. I mean, you have to. Like, I don't, if there was no kids, I would wake up every day,

walk outside and just go, fuck! But I can't. Remember when we were having that party and you just screamed and a kid started crying in the house next door? We felt really bad.

What was that? Yeah, your neighbor was like... What was that? Remember when I screamed at a party and a kid just started crying? Like across the street or something. Yeah, we were out at the fire pit and you were like,

it was like, oh, the neighbors are telling us to keep it down. And you're like, ah, fuck the neighbors. And immediately... keep it down and you're like ah fuck my fuck the neighbors and immediately you just hear this kid oh yeah

and I feel bad about that why should I feel bad about that we all felt really bad we're like oh that was too that was over the line that was over the line

I talked to the neighbors I blamed Randy on that I said you're not a Japanese guy that's always around you guys are Chinese right that was Randy was doing that wasn't Keon

no you know that Chinese guy we told him Taiwan was a country You're not a Japanese guy. That's always around. You guys are Chinese, right? That was Randy was doing that. Wasn't Keon? No. You know that Chinese guy? We told him Taiwan was a country and he just went nuts. He's trying to go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You've seen Super Mario Land on the Game Boy? That level in China

when they're going like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He went like that. He started leaping all around, splitting into three people. All right. Well, thanks, guys, for doing this reboot. Oh, yeah.

It's been fun. It has been fun. I have a song that somebody made. It's some kind of a Ween Maddox parody song. Oh, good old Ween. Do you like Ween? The limited amount that I remember. What do you remember? They had that rainbow song. Oh, good old ween. Do you like ween? The limited amount that I remember. What do you remember? I've had that rainbow

song. There's many colors in the homo rainbow. That was ween, right? Homo rainbow? That's a ween song? Yeah, yeah. There's many colors in the homo rainbow. Don't be afraid to let your colors shine. It's a mixed message. I'm pretty sure that's ween. Alright, well this one is

by, god damn it, it's by somebody. Adam Thoreau. This is pretty sure that's ween. Yeah. All right. Well, this one is by, God damn it. It's by somebody. Adam Thoreau. This is a Maddox ween parody. You guys remember Maddox? No. I think I've heard of that. Yeah, here it is.

Was he on a podcast? He was on a podcast. Okay. Defunct. Yeah. Here we go. Thank you, Adam. See you next Tuesday.

Patreon.com slash The Dick Show. See you next Tuesday. I have an authority that Maddox likes to pee on people in the shower. Not as a Show. See you next Tuesday. Maddox likes to pee on people in the shower. Not out of sexual. Not as a sexual fantasy. He just likes to do it because it's hilarious.

Georgie had a website and a book deal. He also had a bunch of fans and friends. Then he tried to sue a Stereo's dick in Patreon. Oh, yeah, I forgot he sued Patreon. And when he watched Asthmatics, his career came to an end. Now he's getting drunk on Twitch, sometimes for groups of ten. Banana Docs blows. Banana Docs blows. Banana ducks blows Banana ducks blows Banana and blows

is the song Ox-Mad is a bore I don't wanna watch anymore Easy listening Oh, I could've listened to more of that Alright, everybody Here's some voicemails

A couple Let's do a couple voicemails We also need some new Dick Lost songs. Why would we need that? Yeah, well, because you're going to lose on this one. We will never need a Vito Lost song because I'm going to sweep. Really?

Sweep the leg. We got to have like, we should put stakes up for some. Some people said you should make us watch Cuties. I don't want to. I still have not watched that movie. It sounds really boring. I mean, it sounds, it's probably a good movie. Yeah.

I just don't really want to watch it. And I also have no interest in forcing you to watch it because I don't want to watch it. I'm not really like, you can't really annoy me with watching Cuties. Yeah, I feel like I would just watch it and I would go, okay, well that was like a film. Yeah. And then I would furiously jack off. Hey Dick, here's what makes me rage. 90s nostalgia shit, or just nostalgia in general.

And how they try to use this as marketing, you know? Yeah. I'm watching ready player one for the first time fucking horrible like movie it just got me thinking about like this whole like nostalgia shit because everybody was hyping it up to me oh you gotta watch this oh it's such a great film oh it's such a film such nostalgia fuck off if you operate on this whole like nostalgia shit oh you know and i see like a stupid fucking effect oh people are collecting pokemon cards people are collecting like magic cards and shit from the 1990s oh i'm gonna show

my my nintendo 64 games guys i'm totally fucking relevant you know that shit retarded with my fucking money you know it's so fucking stupid you know i doubt that there was people around in the fucking 80s that were like yo dude is that from the 60s is that a 60s reference yes

oh bro the 60s that was called back to the future that's why that happened remember when we had no air conditioning and it fucking sucked you ever hear of 50s diners

yeah all the crazy edubevics they never fucking said that yes they did but here you have a whole bunch of fucking man children

you know losing their Collective shit over Literally the shittiest thing It has gotten worse though the nostalgia Fucking Pokemon cards wow cool The game that nobody knew how to fucking play But every kid collected it And then nobody knew how to play Pokemon

It's easy It is really easy It is true that a lot of people Don't play it though In Minecraft Wow Yeah a lot of the people Who collect Pokemon cards Like never play the game

I played the game a bunch Back in the day though I loved that game Oh good for you It sucks though It is not a well designed game It's not a good game It's a good game for kids.

It's a good, like, learning game. Because you need, like, people to do dumb things. Yeah. For there to be any... Otherwise, this is one I like anyway. It's a super simplistic game. There's no real complexity. People in the...

People in 1910 were like, oh, do you remember 1890? Again, like, the whole, like, 50s nostalgia was, like, a huge thing. Like, remember George Lucas made American graffiti? Remember before we could fly? Remember that? 90 again like the whole like 50s nostalgia was like a huge thing like remember uh george lucas made american graffiti remember before we could fly remember that yeah that was awesome remember trains man when that first train came barreling into town it is it is like more of a thing now though what i have some like the whole nostalgia well let's see i think nostalgia picks up more

when you're living in a really shitty time period, which is now. Yeah. And you're like, oh, I want to go back to when I remember things not sucking. I think people have nothing to do. There's nothing you're going to do.

You have limited money with which to establish a new identity. So why not just surround yourself with the flotsam of your childhood? Comfortable shit. Yeah, because you're never going to own a house like your parents. So why not go back to when you lived in your parents' house and you were comfortable?

Yeah. There's layers. It's weird. It's very, it's a very complex. Dick and John or Vito and Johnny or whoever the hell, this is Rex Sexton. This is respect.

And I have to weigh in on the, uh, uh, toilet debate because my favorite piece of trivia is that 50% of people wipe sitting down and 50% of people wipe standing up. Is that true? 99.5% of people have no idea that anyone else does it any different. I myself am a sitter. I do not understand how the hell someone can get up

to wipe their butt. Because when you do, you risk like piss driblets falling onto the floor, falling onto the rug, falling back in your pants, falling onto your phone if you have that sitting there. Yeah, you have a piss rug?

I don't know how you stand up there and walk around with these handcuffs. What the fuck? Well, I guess they're your skivvies or whatever, but still, your maneuverability

is limited. While standing. Look, man, I got an ass shit every day. I just don't get it. You have to turn around and look at your own

poop and piss. I don't look at my ass. Before you flush, like no, he's... Yeah, you take a look. You want to see, yeah. You want to make sure. Blood, that's green.

You'll never figure out if you're bleeding from your colon or whatever if you can't see it, but that's not really a big deal. He sounds like he's trying to keep it low at work. You don't have to lift your leg to get through it and and why if you just go down from the back and entry through the little hole in the back between you're going down from the back now well like reverse that's messed up i don't know i'd have to look at Slender Man? He's got an extra elbow. He's going under from the back?

That's messed up. I don't know. I'd have to look at somebody wiping their ass sitting down. It's really not that complicated. I go in under the leg then.

I don't know. But then your whole shit is balanced. Or you can go between the legs. You don't throw your back out ever?

Like I throw my back out putting on my seatbelt. You don't throw your back out ever? Like, I throw my back out putting on my seatbelt. You don't throw your... Honestly, I have thrown my back and neck out reaching for the seatbelt in too much enthusiasm.

Yeah. Putting it on, like, fuck! I can easily see getting too jazzed up about sitting down wiping and going like, oh, fuck!

Well, I did that poll. My back. I did a poll on my Twitter and it was like 70% sitting down 30% standing up you got but that's your Twitter yeah

if I posted a Twitter everyone would be subscribed to your ideology how is my Twitter biased towards how you wipe your ass because they're following you yeah but they don't all

listen to your show no but they're following you yeah they like you because there are other shit sitters I didn't give a preference I didn't say

the glorious sitting down or the virgin but they like you there's something in Shitsitters I didn't give a preference I didn't say The glorious sitting down Or the But they like you There's something in the brain Of a shitsitter They know I didn't say which side I was on But they know

They like your comedy already My guys are Up Ready to go Boom Shit over Active Active

Bam Time to wipe Done Are you saying my audience Is lazy And slovenly Yeah And pedophiles

And pedophiles So they would sit And they hate women And they hate women Especially writers I'm not gonna argue With that part Okay let's see here

What about that one That says Vito was right About wiping You wanna listen to more Ass wiping conversations Well I mean That one says I'm right So

Sean doesn't sit here and tell me what to play I don't know if Vito's still fucking there the one thing he's right on one thing is how you wipe your ass he's correct you have to stay sitting or you're just gonna

fucking mush all that shit between your ass crack what are you talking about shit between your ass crack what are you talking about yeah why do you have shit between your ass correct too because in the stall it's so fucking tight i mean i'm six four so my fucking elbows are hitting the wall in the stall i have to fucking stand up use the handicap one idiot and so i'm trying not to get shit on my fucking button up. And then I'm also trying not to fucking be seen over the top.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Are you telling me you don't take your shirt off when I shit? Yeah. What shirt? Like my over shirt?

What do you mean what shirt? Do you shit? Where do you wear your shirts? Do you shit shirtless? Yeah. What are you mean what shirt? Do you shit in shirts? Where do you wear your shirts? Do you shit shirtless? Yeah. What are you talking about? That guy's talking about keeping a... First, you're wearing a button-up shirt, right?

Yeah. And it has those tuxedo tails in the back? Oh, well, yeah, if I was wearing a... Take that shit off. Why would you risk getting shit all over your button-up shirt? I thought you meant like your t-shirt, like you go into a public stall. They even have a little fucking hook

in there they have a little hook in there for what? I thought you were saying that you shit shirtless in a public stall I do but shirtless like your chest is like what the fuck does shirtless mean?

I take my shirt off you don't wear like an undershirt you don't have like a undershirt? yeah no I don't shit shirtless in a public stall i'm sorry no someone looking through the crackly yeah somebody comes through and sees me shitting

like like half naked what do you know it's gonna be more than half naked your pants are down i assume feel free to leave a voicemail about whether or not you shit like bare chested in a public you're wearing a dress up shirt at the airport I'm not wearing a dress shirt normally but like I don't have one with like long tails

what are you like a fancy 20's gentleman do you put your fucking top hat on the hook too what are you talking about if you were wearing

a top hat you would shit in your top hat did you take your top hat not just oh this is totally normal

I don't know my monocle has fallen into the port. Yeah, that's what will happen. What is wrong with you? No. Why would you risk it? I don't go to the fucking public bathroom like it's a fancy ball, okay?

I just go and I shit. What are you talking about? What, do you store toilet paper in your top hat and you keep it on? Yeah, yeah. Take your shirt off. I'm not wearing like a fancy gentleman's robe when I go to the fucking

It's not the fanciness of the shirt, it's the shit that gets on the shirt. Okay, well I don't know. What are these long tails? Do you have a fucking like trail? Like do you have a

What about like a fucking blowback? What about like a puffy jacket or like a big sweater or something? Yeah, what if you're wearing like a ski jacket? I'll take my jacket off.

Oh, okay. It's not the same principle. Because I'm still wearing a shirt. I'm not shitting half naked. It's the being naked that sets you. Just take all your clothes off. You're shitting. And you're shitting and you're worried about being naked? You might piss on your fucking underwear

and your shorts. Why don't you take those off too? Why don't you just get whole fucking naked in the stall? That's your logic. Then fucking do it. No one's stopping you. What do you mean underwear? I'm not. They're all the way down in the stall. That's your logic. Didn't fucking do it. No one's stopping you. What do you mean underwear? They're all the way down on the ground. You should take them off. They're about three feet away from me because I stick my legs straight out

so I don't accidentally get anything on them. Why do you not take your shirt off? You never get shorn when I shit. I'm going to make a poll on Twitter. Do you take your shirt off when you shit? You you shit You 100% And it's gonna be 100%

Shit particles On your dress shirt Bullshit And that you don't dry clean Every time Probably So you're just walking around With basically wearing toilet paper

Good I'm glad You know what On a long flight Oh man I gotta Oh shit That breakfast burrito that I got Is not hitting right

I'm gonna go Take a shit I'm gonna go take off my shirt. Do you take it off on your way to the bathroom? You just tuck it up and hold it there? Yeah. You pull it up a little bit. If I was wearing a dress shirt.

It's all wrinkled. Oh, look at that guy. I was shit. Oh, yeah. Take it off. Hang it up. And you can dress again. Nice and snappy.

If I'm wearing an undershirt. Okay, but I'm not going to. What's all this undershirt shit? What is this, a bear shirt? What are you, Don Draper? This is the 60s? What are you talking about, undershirts? I'm talking about, like, I'll wear a t-shirt with, like, a shirt over it, like I'm wearing right now.

You're wearing two shirts right now? You see, there's a t-shirt with a shirt over it. See, there's my shitting shirt. That's a Void Gazer's shirt. Exactly, I forgot to mention. I'm wearing my Void Gazer's shirt, soers shirt, so I have great taste in all things. Yeah. What are they doing now on Void Gazers?

I have no idea. I just asked Riley for a t-shirt. Do they have an RV yet? They got to get one. They got to get one. Maybe I'll pay for it. Like Chagat and Baked Alaska, who made the news, I saw.

Oh, God. They're really, they're matted. Yeah. Rawstory.com was like posting about it i think because he had to go you saw baked Alaska had to go back in front of a judge because he was ripping on Chagat and like oh really yeah because the judge was mad that he was glad a judge intervened those two's homoerotic trad homoerotic relationship that he was like you're you know you were trying to bait him into a conflict and you're on parole and you shouldn't be doing that.

Your Honor, go fuck yourself. What are you talking about? I don't know. Getting involved here. It was a weird thing. Oh my God, wait, Gavin McGinnis was talking shit. Yeah, he was. Did you watch that?

Was that a new clip? Yeah, I did. He was talking about me or Mersh. Both. Oh, he was talking about me? Yeah. He was talking about me or Mersh. Both.

Oh, he was talking about me? Yeah. He took issue with your thing because it was the clip where you were talking about how you worked on a website for him. Yeah, I thought— And he just kept asking you for shit. Like a total asshole. Yeah. Like, with—disrespectfully. Yeah, not like, hey, can you do me this favor?

Can you do me this favor? And he's like, well, it looks bad. This needs to be updated. It looks bad. I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, Gavin, Gavin, Gavin. Yeah, are you paying me? Gavin, I don't care about you. Yeah.

If you drop dead right now, my life would be improved because then I don't have to get these texts from you. I don't care about you, what you stand, any of this retarded stuff that you claim to stand, what you stand for. Gavin McInnes, what you stand, when you have this retarded stuff that you claim to stand, what you stand for, Gavin McInnes, what you stand for is being a loser.

You are erased from Earth. You're sending apology letters to your new neighborhood so people will like you, which is I have not heard about this. That's fucking weird.

Which is so repugnant to me yeah even imagine trying moving into a neighborhood and appealing to people's better job guys I'm not really as bad as the internet makes me seem oh or his neighbors all turning on him and he he did this he volunteered preemptively do this here this ass yeah like that clone of Jerry and in Rick and Morty where he just moves into a neighborhood and presents his ripe asshole for pounding. I don't understand the mentality of a man

who gets helped on an internet thing, which is, the internet can be difficult if you're a fading hipster and a moron and used to people obsequiously trying to serve you in any capacity they can because they think you're your dad. But you subscribe to an ideology of loserdom. You lost.

All of your dumb Proud Boys went to fucking jail because you're stupid you thought that this would be an acceptable way to behave and you were wrong all of it was wrong because you're a fucking moron that's why

that's why those guys got really high on whatever they were pushing oh yeah we're not beating off and we're all proud of each other we're gonna go protest oh And we're all proud of each other. We're going to go protest. Oh, we accidentally ran somebody over. Prison, federal prison. Well, yeah, but other people are,

no, no, no, you, you, you, you're in prison. You're in prison. Well, yeah, but other people, the hypocrisy, no, no, prison. Prison. Because your gay little club, your gay little club got people thrown into prison

for the rest of their fucking lives. You did that because you're a fucking idiot. And it's the same mindset that goes into texting me, hey, this needs to be updated right now. Prison. See, I'm using the maximum of my authority to say, fuck you, because I don't like the way you're talking to me, which is what society did collectively.

Oh, wow. That's a really nice gay club you got there. It'd be a shame if somebody were to go to prison for the rest of their fucking life. Oh, well, I mean, well, this is an American. No shit, dummy. There's no America. It's just a series of authoritarian,

it's just a series of authoritarians that you have you have to learn how to deal with from when you're born to when you're fucking dead um anyway

I didn't listen to his video what he if he said anything about me but god it's like you go to somebody comes over like a mechanic comes over

can you look at my car I was like yeah you know I'll get to it like oh well you know could be well I need I need it working yeah

like buddy I need the entire engine rebuilt tonight i need to know yeah um man uh don't fucking talk to me like that ever again yeah a lot of the clip was him correcting mersch because i oh yeah he's like well actually you know the legal fund worked out and I never took advantage of anyone everyone who listens to you went really well for them fucking loser the entire so many people

on the right conservatives whatever they want to lose so they can act like little girls and complain about how they're oppressed and they can act like little girls and complain about how they're oppressed and they can have big beards say that makes them a man

but it's just how to be a loser it's the same victimhood culture that they complain about is that you want to be the victim because then you get the money you get the book deal I was censored I was whatever else I was censored come to censored TV yeah come to censored TV get the book deal i was censored i was whatever else i was censored

come to censored tv yeah come to censored about how i was censored it's cringe.com check it out i mean it's it is built right into it is built right into his brand i was censored you know you're taking a stand pathetic is what it is pretty transparent what it is uh and they know that that's what they're doing which Which is fine in a way, but... It's not fine. At a certain point when it's everybody's brand is I got censored. Can you believe that? Yeah.

Can you believe that I got censored? Yeah. What did you think was happening? For some people, I feel bad. Because I'm under a military technocracy. What are you thinking? Well, I thought this was America. Yeah, you thought wrong.

This is America. I thought this was America. Yeah, you thought wrong. This is America. I thought this was America. Grow the fuck up. All right, everybody. See you next Tuesday.