The Biggest Problem in the Universe - Episode 30 - The Flip-Flopalypse

Episode Date: February 26, 2022

Vladimir Putin, Nuclear War, Flip Flops Breaking, The Cost of Admission (Rich Kid Nation)

I find that people like when we scat the theme song People like scatting a lot Scatting and whistling Scatting is the biggest solution in the universe That's an interesting idea Maybe we should talk about the biggest solution in the universe sometime Biggest solution in the universe What are the biggest I mean we universe sometime. Biggest solution in the universe. Uh-huh.

What are the biggest... I mean, we are doing so well with the problems. Yeah. Maybe we should... Clearly, we could fix the world. Clearly, we could do something about it. Is this a discussion for a previous discussion? I don't know what you're talking about.

Are you ready to go? Yeah, I guess we can just get right into it. Let's do it. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Biggest problem in the universe. Welcome to the biggest problem in the universe.

The only show that ranks every problem in the universe from worms in your ears to dicks in kids' readers. I'm your host, Nick Masterson. Joining me as always, Fido Juice Walsey. You got me off guard with that one, Dick. I know. I changed it at the last minute. Yeah, you snuck it up on me. Just like a pedophile.

Just like they will. That is their MO. Just like they. They. We can't say the word, right? Because then you get demonetized john our youtube i had to spell it creatively yep the files oh the files is that what you call them yeah the file like the fonzie the files the p files the files are here what's up boy the less

popular spinoff of the x files it was worth way more popular. Let me tell you something. In certain communities, yes. If there was a remake of the X-Files called the P-Files, where they hunted down peas, and there was a cigarette-smoking man, and the lone gunmen were all with their, like, terabytes. But they all had their terabytes of C-Porn to, like, hunt the guys, right? And Scully was like, you know, those guys are

way too many. They have way too much of it. Everyone's been focusing on what's on top of Epstein's Island. No one's focusing on what's beneath the surface. Oh my god! Tunnels! Yeah, tunnels. Vans with white vans. The center of the earth. That's where they hold the children.

The B-Files. The truth is out there okay you ready i'm ready pedophiles well that's a pretty uh pretty it's a pretty big problem all right big winner right here well i i want to i want to say that i brought that problem in its spirit you know i was right there with you this is a group this is a group win for everyone okay earworms though that's not a group that was number two earworms oh come on i got some of the songs stuck in my head all week yeah the final fantasy one that was a good acapella that we did we did do a pretty solid rendition pac-man theme song yeah that's another one i could just do them all day There's a lot of good ones

You know what one I always Has been stuck in my head For like 30 years What's that? The Bubble Bobble theme Did you ever play that game? I did play it How did it go?

For 30 years That's been stuck in my head That song in particular Local businesses That should have been higher it didn't get very high but I saw a lot of comments in solidarity

and I think those people understand I think a lot of these guys are buying the propaganda support the small business small businesses are trash who do you think is doing the propaganda? Amazon Jeff Bezos

they want you to go in there so you hate them right? they're setting Jeff Bezos. They want you to go in there so you hate them. Right? They're setting... Jeff Bezos is using his media empire to set your expectations sky high so that when you go in there and they're rude assholes, you're like, I hate small businesses.

Where's Amazon? Right? Yeah. That's what they're doing. He's overselling the small business so you can't help but be disappointed. Right. Yeah.

Like, cheers. They set your expectations as that's a bar. That's not a bar. No. Let me tell you something. small business so you can't help but be disappointed right yeah like cheers like they set that your expectations is that's a bar that's not a bar no let me tell you something there's no norm boy was i shot there is a norm but he's a child predator who stumbles in they're they're all cliff and norm yeah i don't know uh fear of a black elf what a fucking disaster. Well, the audience is afraid of a certain things. Diversity, progress. I think there's certain elements of this audience who support moving forward into a bright, glorious, diverse future. A future past.

It's in the past. Hell yeah, it's in the past. It's a lie. It's long ago, right? It's long ago. Well, but it's not. But it's not. It's a lie. It's long ago, right? It's long ago. Well, but it's not. But it's not. It's in just a middle.

Point is, bigots, you're being left behind. Get on the right side of history. So you did woke marketing. Yes. And that is the top. And then you also brought in marketing show.

Fear of woke. Fear of woke marketing. But it's not being marketed as woke. I'm going to argue it's not marketing. What are the billboards then? What's on the billboards? What's the ads? What do I know about the show other than the blackness?

Well, just because they have a black character, how do you show it and it's not woke? Should they have put a picture of the black character and went, sorry. Yeah, sorry. That's the conundrum. They should have put it up and it said, don't worry. Yeah. It's not about. See, that's the conundrum though is we've reached the point. It's not a conundrum They should have put it up And it said don't worry Yeah

It's not about See that's the conundrum though Is we've reached the point It's not a conundrum No no no it is We've reached the point now Where you see a black character And you just go

Well that's woke It's like no It's woke if they do certain things With the black character Shut up But you can't just go Oh there's a lady in it So it's woke

No you have to wait To see what they do with the lady Nah just right away Fuck this It is true Why'd they do so it's woke. No, you have to wait to see what they do with the lady. Nah, just right away. Fuck this. It is true. Why'd they do the ad then if they didn't want me to go, ah, fuck you? Just put the show out. Just put the show.

Do they need to say it in advance? Just put it out, and I'll watch it. No, because then they'll say, oh, they snuck diversity on us. They didn't even tell us there was going to be a black elf. Well, they don't need to. No matter what you do. This is what they risk. No matter what you do.

They could just put the show out and let the show speak for itself, but they got to tease you and advertise and do all this bullshit. It's their fault. I'm going to work on some advertisements for you guys where it goes, listen, it's going to be okay. Right below the black elf we go, but it's not about Black Lives Matter. You got to send a care package to the quartering and nerd Roddick and all those guys saying, look, look, I know what it looks like. We're sorry.

Here's some shoe polish and a bow. If you could just go on your stream and not... Right? Yeah, if you wear this for a part of the show, it'll really help.

You'll get it. Yeah, you'll get it. You'll get it. They're on their streams. Chucks4W says, this show peaked with World War II flags. It'll never get better than this.

Well, I don't know if I can disagree because that was such a fantastic... I have replayed that clip a dozen times. It was great. I had to isolate it and it's actually available

on our YouTube channel. You can watch it separate. King Silo says, Why does Vito think they'd care or feel the need to explain where the black elf came from? I would bet money

that there won't be a scene where the elf goes, Yo, I'm from Elf Compton. There's probably gonna be something. And even if there's not, there won't be a scene where the elf goes yo i'm from elf compton there's probably gonna be something and even if there's not there doesn't need to be i'm from lower earth i'll just accept that elves are very progressive i'm from west earth yeah yeah um speaking of uh i didn't bring this in i don't know if you got it did you see somebody brought up the brown toads on twitter oh i did I did see that. Yeah. Makes sense, though. They live in the desert. Of course they're brown.

Okay, so if the elf is from a desert, is that okay? Well, I don't know. I don't know if you can have a spiritual desert. Why can't we have a brown toad, but we can't have a black elf? Because the toad's a little guy. A fungus. He's not, like, magical. How?

A toad is not magical? If Q showed up as black, I would go, what are you doing? Yeah. Why did you pick to be? What are you doing this? He would have a reason right now Okay, you we're gonna black elves, but we can have black toads, but not black elves. You can have them It's just a little odd We're gonna find out you make it everything that cannot can or cannot i don't hear this guy

says i don't know if this is public knowledge but i can confirm that amazon has a race quota mandate for both cast and crew i've been working on a couple amazon shows myself to shoot myself in the foot oh has one of my problems amazon let us know that 75 of our crew needs to be black or multicultural um i grew up in a multicultural household yet my skin is not multicultural so i was lumped into the allotted 25 of whites anyway they skirt the law by calling this a goal instead of a mandate but we know um the goal was to have a few oh geez blacks on set gentlemen oh we know that if the goal was to have as few blacks as possible, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah,

they're the real races. What do you think about that? We had talked about Amazon's diversity, whatever the thing, and I have said, look, if it ever comes out that we only had a black elf because we had to...

But how do you deny it? We specifically had to fix a checkbox. Because they have that quota saying, we want 50% by 2024. Yeah, but of course everybody's people behind the camera i mean i don't agree with that mandate again though i can't i can say that i disagree with the mandate existing but i have to wait to see if the show is actually doing something okay okay ridiculous before i can be like oh it's definitely woke bronzac says veto says just watch

it before complaining. Oh, no. Vito has never made a prediction about something before it happened based on available information. Obviously, I've done that. I don't. I'm saying. What information do you have other than there's a black elf? You don't have information.

Okay. I have. When I make a prediction based on information, I don't go like, oh, Oh my god It's the end of the fucking world Because there's a black guy I go well let's You know wait and see And I usually I usually review things After they're out

Speaking of the end of the world Can I get to my problem please Yeah Nuclear Armageddon Nuclear World War 3 Nuclear Armageddon

Problem for me You might not agree because you voted for this right you vote we all told you oh my god we all told you that biden is gonna caught biden is gonna fuck around biden has uh bribes and shit in the ukraine we told we warned you about this we said his son is having a problem in Ukraine. They paid him a lot of money, and he's going to do something fucked up there. And what do you know? We said his son is entangled somehow in the energy sector in Ukraine. What are you talking about? His energy companies in Ukraine, gas companies, are paying his son millions of dollars for no reason.

That's a problem. To do what exactly? To do what exactly? To do what exactly? To start wiggling his dick around on the precipice of nuclear war. That's what. No, no, no. This is a whole separate thing. Nuclear fucking war that you caused.

That you caused. Yeah, good. That you voted for. At this point, the way, the stupidity of you and your people, whoever they or maybe We told you that this would happen and now it happened. And it's your fault.

It's not my fucking fault. How does this Hunter Biden have anything to do with what's going on right now? How indeed? Why is he on the payroll of all these energy companies in Ukraine? Because he did some fucking nepot? Because he got, he did some fucking nepotism and he got his kid a fucking job. It didn't lead to Putin. What do you think the money was for?

It didn't lead to Putin invading. 4,000 active nukes in the world. Oh, is that my vote? Did I vote for all the nukes? No. Thank you. But they're there. Okay. They're there.

Okay. Yeah. You're not going to not. You know what I feel like with nuclear war? What do you think? It's like Chekhov's gun. Right? Am I getting that reference right?

The playwright Anton Chekhov who said if you put a gun in a scene, you have to use it. If you put it in the first act, it must be fired by the third act. Or else people don't like it. Or otherwise, why did you put a gun on the mantelpiece? Because it's unresolved, right? Right. I feel that way with nuclear weapons, big time. Like, everybody learned about them. And then we never used them.

And then they get to their deathbed, and they're like, when are we going to use those? I really need, like I learned all about it and I see them and I saw the, but I need to have used it. I don't care if it wipes us all out. Like I need it. Yeah. I don't need it. I don't want it.

Why did you vote for it then? I didn't vote for it. You know what? Did you ever hear what Trump said about nuclear weapons and all his loose talk about, I can't wait to nuke anybody who fucks with me? Yeah. I voted against that. That worked, by the way.ke anybody who fucks with me. Yeah, that worked. That worked, by the way.

It didn't work. What do you mean it worked? You don't know that it worked. Why? Because for 40 years there was no nuclear war. Nobody started shit with Trump. That's why.

So every other president had worked too then. And Biden, there hasn't been a nuclear war yet so I can say it worked for Biden as well. It's closer. Until the nuke goes off,

it's worked for fucking everybody. Okay, so I should have you on the top of my speed dial for when I see the mushroom cloud, so I can hit dial to call you and say now you voted for nuclear war. When the nuke goes off, you're allowed to call me and say you voted for this. Okay. Just trying to understand the liberal... And you don't have

a response queued up. Somehow that's Trump's fault or my fault. It is kind of still trump's fault he led to this it is a series of lessening sanctions and cozying up to the russians and uh cozying up yeah that's very that's what we've been doing for 40 years cozying up not blaming them for everything that's wrong with our country every day. They do a lot of horrible things, the Russians. They're not good people. Like what? Back up the independence of sovereign territories in Ukraine?

Hey, we're tired of being in Ukraine. We want to be independent. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, okay. Oh my god. Here's a... Here's a list. We're tired of being Ukrainians. We're tired of being in Ukraine. They treat us like shit. They're bullying us. They're bullying us.

Putin says, alright. That's what they're all saying putin's coming to save them he's gonna denazify that uh well ukraine is yeah yeah good there's lots of nazis there oh okay i hope he denazifies every fucking part of the globe u.s has five five thousand nuclear warheads yes russia has,000 UK The rest are surprising me UK has 250 France has 300 China has 350 I would have thought China would have like a million

Because they got so many people China got there late Yeah We started building them like Immediately Like us and Russia Were just like Oh yeah let's do it

Let's do it Crank this shit out By the time China came around It's like We had realized like We don't need 6,000 of these. We're only ever going to fire one or two if we need them. This is our parents doing this. How many nukes did you guys make?

Oh, like 50,000. Why? Why did you make so many? You only need like 50 to destroy everything. It was the spirit of the times. Everybody was getting in on it. India. No, they weren't.

Just you guys. Well, yeah, but everybody with us. All of us were. All of us were into it. Everybody with money and who was having fun. The older I get,

the dumber our parents get. India, 160. That's a good statement, actually. It really is true. It's like, what? Because now, my earliest memories of them are how old I am now

Right And I'm thinking And I'm going What the fuck were you thinking Yeah My parents were idiots Pakistan 165

Wow North Korea 45 Israel has 90 nukes Did you know that Does India have any Yeah 160 Oh

You think that's too many I think a lot of people too Who is it we're trying to keep from getting them turkey huh right fucking turkey man you guys don't get shit do you know we gave them to russia one of oppenheimer's guys from the manhattan project just walked into the russian embassy and said here you go here's a communist yeah here's all the research we've been doing oh good salamis good work communist from berkeley Oppenheimer's buddy. I don't want you guys to fall behind. A real Bernie Sanders type.

Yeah. And Oppenheimer originally wanted to be only tactical, but the president said, no, no, we got to, come on, we got to do this big. We're America. We got to make a doomsday device. Yeah.

I don't really think you guys should have a doomsday device. He wanted devices capable of tactical strikes, not just destroying entire continents. Yeah, to just settle battles. Like, less people. Anyway. No, no, no. That's not fun.

Even a small nuclear war with 50 Hiroshima bombs. I'm sorry, what did you say? Small nuclear war. Yeah. Will knock up 5 million pounds of soot into the air. Oh, I hate soot. It'll drop corn and wheat production By about 40% in 5 years And 2 billion people

Would starve That's pretty bad And no one even has bombs that small anymore That's what new kids wear Anywhere It kicks up so much soot That it lowers the temperature And blocks out the sun for 5 years

And 2 billion people will die of starvation Well that's just fun If each side Now here's what you the temperature and blocks out the sun for five years and two billion people will die of starvation. Well, that's just fun. If each side... Now, here's what you... That's... You didn't vote for that. What you voted for was each side shooting 2,000 nukes like all of them. Or a bunch of them. Why would we do that?

Temperatures would drop 20 degrees. Rain would drop by half. People couldn't go outside because they'd be sunburned. Nuclear winter. Jesus. And that would only take would drop by half people couldn't go outside because they'd be sunburned nuclear winter and that would only take uh that would only take a thousand two thousand and the u.s has 800 ready to go within minutes why yeah why well that's why i got so brag about it too well yeah that's why I got so worried when fucking Trump was talking about how great nukes are and how he can't wait to nuke everybody.

That was a real problem. So you voted for a guy who has no brain. No, no, no. I voted for a guy... Who doesn't know if he's nuked or if he's dreaming. That was one of the reasons I really didn't like Trump was his loose talk about nukes. You don't even joke about that shit. And he was like, well, we got all these nukes.

Who knows what could happen? I'm like, shut the fuck up. Don't even joke about that. And you're going to say, well, he was talking tough. That really got all these nukes. Who knows what could happen? I'm like, shut the fuck up. Don't even joke about that. And you're going to say, well, he was talking tough. That really puts all these guys in line. No, that makes them all think that they can do the same fucking thing. Yeah. You can't even joke about nukes?

Not if you're a fucking president of the United States. No. Why not? Because it's fucking, it gets everybody nervous and crazy, and they might launch their own nukes. Oh. I find it very unpresidential. Here's somebody else I got from the army.

Was bragging about how if Trump told him to launch a nuclear attack, he would say it's illegal so he won't do it. Good. That's good, you think? Yes. That there's a guy, that the balance is like a cute joke that that he like a reverse joke about actually it's illegal. He he he I think this is the devastation of the entire planet My hope is that everybody working at these nuclear facilities with the launch keys is secretly thinking No, i'm i'm never i'm never gonna launch that thing. I don't care what happens. There's no point

What if a guy's having a bad day just got broke? He just got catfished by a fat woman That's why they know you can't just press a button it's like a series of checks and balances What is it? What if it's not even connected? What if the engine like what if the engineer just said like I'm not plugging this shit in fuck. I hope that's what I Hope that Honestly, I trust engineers more than I trust fucking heads of state to fucking run shit. Yeah. I'd rather an engineer's in there and he's like, I'm just disconnected.

It's all a joke. I think we should just get it over with. Why don't we just do the nuclear war? Why don't we choose one country nobody likes. We all launch every nuke at them all at once. Let's say the country at the same time. No, let's not. Let's say the country at the same time No let's not

Because I saw I saw a vowel Coming out of your mouth I could have said it That could have been anything And I immediately regretted This thought proposal You're like

Let's think No But then it would get out of our system For a while Right We got the nuclear war out of our system. Okay, we got to get an alien threat to a nuke.

That's why we make all these movies about nuking the aliens. Why's that? To get that feeling off our chest of, God, what are we going to do with these things?

We got to nuke the moon, as they say. Do they say that? It was a Bob and David sketch. You ever saw that one? We're going to blow up the moon? No. And all of humanity is totally stoked on it. They're like, we're gonna

blow up the fucking moon! Hell yeah! And there's this one astronaut monkey and he's like sign languaging and they're like, what's he saying? He's just, he's saying why. Why? And everyone's like, oh! Fucking, he ruined our fun! It does feel like that. We finally have the technology to blow up the moon!

It feels like most guys think the nuclear bomb is their dick. When they talk about it, they're joking about it always like it's their dick. Does it ever feel like that to you? Like, well, we got the nuke. It's not your nuke, first of all. And if you launch it, everyone's dead. You're living under tin roofs and you can't stick your arm out because it's going to get a UV burn. Yeah, you got to wear a snowsuit out in the middle of a desert.

But they want it still. It's this sickness in people to want that annihilation. It's like smoking and driving fast. That's why it's a big problem because it's happening. It will eventually happen. You know what it is? It's like when you buy insurance and you go, I hope I never need it. But you do.

But you do hope you have to use it. As soon as you have it. All those guys who built bomb shelters are like, I built this fucking thing. I thought I was going to be the smartest guy on my block. I was going to watch all my neighbors vaporize while I ate beans. That's why it's a big problem. Nobody wants cancer. Nobody wants whatever

woke marketing. But people, everybody wants a nuclear war. Everybody wants nuclear Armageddon so they don't have to go to work anymore. They don't have to talk to their wife. Maybe they can have two wives in the apocalypse. Maybe their dog will grow another head. It's like having two dogs for the price of one.

There's no Tinder. Bitch has to look you in the eyes when she's talking to you. Probably not enough material to make... She can't even look in your eyes because they'll burn out of the sockets. We're all going to have to grope through the darkness. Yeah, you finally have an excuse to have abs... You can't even look in your eyes because they'll burn out of the sockets. We're all going to have to grope through the darkness. Yeah, you finally have an excuse to have abs. You can't just snack all day.

Yeah. Cool. Man. Eventually those... Women will look at you with respect. Eventually those Tim Pool doomsday buckets run out. You could just walk up to Tim Pool,

punch him right in the face. There's no cops. Who are you going to call, Tim? Take his beanie. No one's keeping that hat on you anymore, buddy. He's got to ditch the hat at this point. It's like a running joke. That's my problem.

Nuclear war. I guess as a hat man, I can't really come down on him. Yeah, but you take your hat on. I take the hat off. I just, uh, I hate shaving my head, so I don't do it enough. And if I don't shave it, it'll look stupid. Do you have one of those razors that goes in your hand? I had one, but it sucks. I think I got a cheap Chinese one. I should get another one.

The ones with, like, eight blades. It always gets gum got a cheap Chinese one. I should get another one. The ones with like eight blades. It always gets gummed up, and then it yells at me in Chinese. Nuclear war, Dick. That you voted for. Such bullshit. I voted against it. If nuclear war happens, it's your fucking fault. I'm sorry, but the guy with the nukes is your guy.

Okay, but if Biden doesn't launch the nuke, then it's not my fault. If Putin launches the nuke, it's Putin's fault. It's everyone who voted for Putin. Biden would just sit there with his thumb up his ass? Yes, I would hope so. I hope that if anyone ever launches a nuke, we go, you know what? Whatever. What can you do? What does the retaliation get us? It might

kill more innocent people. Who is them? Everybody's not me. I don't know what's going to happen, Dick. But I'll tell you who will be responsible. Yeah. And he is my biggest problem. It's a man you may have heard of.

His name is almost as bad as Seth Rogen. Okay. Vladimir Putin is the biggest problem in the universe, Dick. Wow. Have you heard of this guy? Have you seen this guy? Oh, shut the fuck up with the buzzers. Fuck you. Yeah. I'm sorry. Why is everybody pretending

that Putin's like... He's awesome, man. Yeah, exactly. I get this from you guys. Fucking riding around on a bear with no shirt. It's all fucking... KGB badass. He's not a bad ass. He's a psychopath. He brings dogs around a lady who's afraid of dogs. This is the,

this is a big part of the problem is that, is that little brained morons are so easily baited into going, Oh, it's Chad. He's so Chad. It's fucking cool. He poisons guys like, like journalists and protesters.

That's so cool. Journalists. Yeah. And then you guys go, you guys go, I can't believe That's so cool. Journalists, yeah. And then you guys go, you guys go, I can't believe Biden stole the election. And then you go, that Putin guy is great. Oh, cool. You don't like elections being stolen? I don't like it when it happens to me.

Oh, okay. So it's Chad if it happens to the Russian people. I don't care about that. You don't give a shit. Well, they steal it back and forth all the time. Who steals it back and forth? The Russians? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, and forth all the time. Who steals it back and forth? The Russians? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no, no.

Yes. Putin steals it every time. That's how this Ukraine shit started, actually. Way back, like in the early teens, there was a contentious election that stole the presidency of Ukraine away from a Moscow guy to a West-friendly guy. Yeah. In the very beginning. Started all this disaster.

Okay. Go ahead. I'm sorry. Well, it's just interesting that you're so upset about elections, but then a guy in a foreign country does it, and he's the coolest guy in the world. He's pretty. I mean, he's not the coolest. Well, as the great John McCain said, Vladimir Putin is a thug and a murderer and a killer and a KGB agent.

All four of those are bad things. Dick, this guy is a madman. He's a psychopath. Why do you think that? Because he's a former KGB agent who now wants Russia to return to this era of back when he was a super spy cool guy. Yeah, he's sick of taking shit from us all day every day. They're taking shit because they're a shit fucking

country that fucks with everybody and they just need to knock it off. They're not in charge anymore. What are they fucking with? They didn't do anything. They didn't do anything. NATO said we're not going to Eastern Europe. Then all of a sudden they got a whole bunch of fucking countries in NATO and Putin's like, well, what the fuck? You guys said you weren't putting any NATO guys here.

Ukraine is not in NATO right now. They were about to be. No, they were not about to be. Yes, they were. They want to be, but they're not. They made a special plea with Biden to let him do it, which was part of the whole fucking bribe in the first place. And Putin had to get China to say no.

Regardless, Ukraine is a sovereign nation. If they want to join NATO, it's their fucking business nato said no we're not letting anybody east of germany we're not letting anybody east of germany in don't worry we won't fuck you up we won't fuck you over okay and then next thing you know poland fucking hungary and czech republic all sovereign nations are allowed to do what they want if they want to be a part of nato okay fucking putin just has to suck it up. He doesn't own those countries. But they always fuck with him. NATO is there to fuck with him. By saying we want to be a part of a unilateral coalition that is not...

Against you. Yeah, because you suck. Stop sucking and we won't need a NATO. They just want to steal his oil. They want to get all the countries together so they can gang up on him and take his oil and fuck up his oil pipelines. No, we have not fucked up any of his oil, Russia. Yes, you have.

Germany has not approved his fucking Nord 2 pipeline in like 10 years. They didn't approve it, and then they fucking rescinded it because he's fucking around again. They just, they had the Nord 2 moving forward, and then Putin goes, well, now we're going to, now we got to invade Ukraine for no fucking reason. Invade? Yes, invade. He's protecting those two territories that said we don't want to be part of Ukraine anymore.

Oh, yeah. He said, oh, what did he say? I don't even fucking have it here. Donbass and Lufthaka or whatever said, we're independent. And by the way, Ukraine already said you guys can be independent, but you have to give us the border first.

They said, no, give us our independence first. He said, no, fuck you. So Putin said, okay, I'm sending guys in there to protect them he said it's a fun training exercise guys we're doing a fun training exercise don't even worry about it and then all of a sudden he goes well you know we gotta we gotta save these people from uh what the fuck was he even talking about ukraine he's saving them from ukraine! Ukraine attacks those guys all the fucking time! This Putin guy is a real bad nut, I tell you what. Thank God for Putin!

What the fuck? Why? Why? Thank God! Yeah, to protect what? The Europe? Sovereignty! Yeah, the idea of freedom in the Eastern Bloc! Thank God! The separatist parts of Ukraine that are going, Oh, please come fire missiles at us! We need somebody to stand up to Angela Merkel!

Please come in with your tanks and your soldiers and kill all of us. That's what we want. We want you to capture our capital cities. This is how we want this to happen. Let me shut my dog up. I'll be right back. Your dog is distracting and flustering. Ay, ay, ay.

Well, I was arguing with two people there your dog backing you up okay let's be clear this putin guy has a history that tells me this guy's not a good not a good boy not a good friend fucking a cia operative i mean kgb operative kg I mean, KGB operative. KGB, yes, who has killed many of his enemies, including politicians, journalists, not to mention the exiled former Russian spy, Alexander Litvienko, who we remember was poisoned with polonium, a woman's weapon, as we know. That is a woman, yeah. He's a little bitch. Can't even shoot a guy in the head properly. He can't even poison them properly because half the time they survive. Making them all ugly.

Yeah, making them all fucked up with their face. What's that all about? Come on. I'll give you that. That's fucked up. That he's got uggo poison sitting around? It's like, just kill me, dude. Yeah, dude.

Don't fuck up my face. Because now you're making me have this thing with my wife where it's like, oh, well, you know. The horrible conversation, like, would you love me if I was like ugly yeah and women's become real has become real and like nobody means that shit yeah i'm like no it really fucks up their face we got pockmarks like crazy yeah uh probably i mean one of the one of the scariest here's the thing about putin is that he's everything guys like you claim to hate and And then you fucking love him. Why do I hate? What do you mean that I hate? Do you love false flag bombings that are used as a pretext for seizing political power? Would you like if Biden, you know, staged 9-11?

Would you like that? No. No? No? Did you like when George W. Bush maybe did it? Did it? Okay, because... Wait, why?

When did that happen? When Putin in 1999 was prime minister he had only a two percent approval rating when all of a sudden there was a series of bombings from the chechen rebels those guys are bad guys okay so you're saying he staged it well there has been strong suspicions that these were a false flag attack from Russia's own security services. Who put the Nazis in Ukraine? We all did. CIA did.

You think the CIA implanted Nazis? Yes. To do what? Why? To fuck up, to cause fucking problems in those independent states that Putin is protecting.

That's why he sent in the peacekeepers in the first place. The false flag on top of a false flag on top of a false flag. You don't think the CIA does that? Do you like the free, uh, you know, all these protests that you like attending? Aren't those fun? Yeah. You know, political, uh, dissidents?

Yeah. Yeah, don't try to pull that shit in Russia. There's currently 102 people held in Russian prison for their political beliefs alone. Not to mention the current Russia protest, uh, the current Russian protest against the invasion of Ukraine. They have arrested about 400 people during these demonstrations. And meanwhile, you're worried about truckers.

They can't honk their horns. They're just honking their horns. And then the Russians arrest a bunch of protesters. You go, yeah, but that Putin, he's got it all figured out. So you're saying Trudeau is as bad as Putin? I'm saying guys like you are... Yes, sure. Now we're getting somewhere.

As long as you're not a fucking hypocrite. It's like you guys, again, the elections, it's bad if Biden does it. The CIA... It's great when Putin does it. The CIA put the president in the Ukraine in 2014. They totally disregarded the election and they put a fucking coup. They put a coup on them. What do you want them to do?

The CIA did this? I'd have to read into this. What are you going to possibly read where the CIA admits fucking up Ukraine? Regardless if the Ukrainians accept the outcome of the election, it's their state. They're allowed to determine what they want.

So what about the Don Disguise or whatever? If Putin's not bringing it up, if Putin said, like, when did this happen? Like, 12 years ago? Yeah, 2014. That was your time to deal with it. It's not even his. He's got a lot of shit on his plate. Well, good.

Then why is he fucking with Ukraine? Deal with your own fucking shit. You don't get to wait eight years later and go, oh, by the way, I decided that your president is, you know, not up and up. He doesn't want a bunch of NATO guys right on his fence looking in going, hey, what's going on over there? Oh, this place looks pretty good. Ukraine is not in NATO.

They were about to be. Don't you understand? They were trying to get in and we would have very likely let them in. No, we would have said no because it's going to piss off Putin as we pretty much established. And Biden went to him and he's like, look We can come up with some common sense shit Like, okay, they want to be a part of Russia Or NATO, but we can make sure they don't have guns on the border

They don't have this and that Like, we'll make some concessions, of course But then they lie about it. The US lies about everything Yeah, so does fucking everybody So who cares We're not going to put guys east of Germany Don't worry Oh, you'd put guys in three of those countries They used to be called the who cares? Then you can't make a decision based on anything. East of Germany, don't worry. Oh, you'd put guys in three of those countries.

They used to be called the Iron Curtain. You remember that? Yeah. You like music. You like free expression. You as an artist, you like to be able

to freely express yourself. Don't try doing that in Russia as we've seen bands like Pussy Riot sent to jail for their dissident. Fuck you. Fuck Pussy Riot.

You have to support all artistic expression. I'm not saying you have to like the stupid music or whatever else. You think that's the same as like, hey, we want to be our own country. Can you let us? I'm just saying.

And then shooting me? Another thing on a long list of Putin's horrible fucking things that he has done. That's not that many bad things. There's a lot. That's just what we know about. He's the only one standing up for

territories' rights to be sovereign. He's going to run the fake elections, and that'll be better. You know what? Did you see that Ukraine's trying to get Russia deplatformed off Twitter? They deserve it. they should have well there's the terms of service here you go again here you go again and i would say russia has

broken the terms of service reporting you and ukraine like this i'm gonna false flag russia i'm gonna i'm gonna what do you call it false flagging flag them yeah except they're false flag ends with hundreds of people dying point is this vladimir putin is a he's a old madman who thankfully the world is united against him these sanctions will be swift and sanctions of what on all this stuff except for oil well oh yeah we're gonna putin you you're fucked. We're gonna charge you for everything Well, not not the oil we need the oil well not the oil Well, they're not well not the fucking rare earth metal. We need to work. Oh, we need to hear rare earth metal

Okay, not the oil not the oil for Germany not the rare earth man Like but all these Russian businessmen are locked out of the Western market. They're going to be angry. All of Putin's cronies. They're going to be yelling at him. Why do you think sanctions hurt anybody but the poor? Well, I mean, they're also going to hurt the poor. They're going to hurt the poor a lot. Which is great. Good.

I'm glad. That's good. It's good because it will motivate them to stop being fucking idiots who blindly support this weirdo. Oh, I see. I see. So the election is stolen. Yes. So he's not elected.

And you still want to punish the people who did not elect him. Well, I see. I see. So the election is stolen. Yes. So he's not elected. Yeah. And you still want to punish the people who did not elect him. Well, they got to work to get him out of there. I assume you want them I assume you're I want a glorious uprising of the Russian people and we're seeing some dissidents in the street. Seeing these

seeing the Russian people protesting even as they're being stuffed into police vans is a truly inspiring sight. But it's not enough. It is a direct rebuke to fools like you who support a dictator and a madman while claiming that you hate any infringement on life, liberty, or the pursuit of happiness. Man, you try to fuck with my oil pipeline, you're getting fucked with. I don't know what to tell you. Everything goes out the window.

I just want to lay this pipe and mind my own business. I got a lot of oil over here. You're not allowed to use credit card processing to protect oil interests. If I had a bunch of nukes, I would be able to use credit card processing. And you wouldn't like how I got to do that. Build a fucking nuke then. I would like to, but your Democrats and supreme court have put restraints on the second amendment so i cannot do my second amendment rights and build a nuclear bomb in my garage

i hope you build a fucking nuclear bomb i can't you deserve one yeah good fucking idiot uh my problem is vladimir putin and uh the morons who support him blindly why in his pursuit of evil across the globe he can play a piano that's true what's he can play hockey pretty okay it seems like he can yeah yeah look at how with it aren't you don't you ever look at that and say wow now that's a leader did you ever see the time he uh went snorkeling and immediately pulled like a 10 000 year old relics out from like two feet of beach. Really? Yeah.

They're like, that's awesome. I didn't, uh, I keep getting his name, Biden. They have that same, cause you said he's evil. It's cause it's I N they both had an I N. Uh, they go, Oh yeah. He went snorkeling yesterday. He got in the water and immediately comes up with these ancient jugs of like pottery and all these archeologists are like, that's not how that works.

Those aren't just cool though. Yeah. And all these archaeologists are like, that's not how that works. Those aren't just. That's cool though. Yeah. Biden's. Killing bears. Telecasting from a fake White House. Total Chad. What is the difference between Putin's fake archaeology and Biden.

It's not a fake White House. Fucking sitting in a fake White House getting fake injections. It's next door to the White House. Having press conferences that end at three so he can go get his dementia medication. Oh, and he's a hologram and he's reading off a teleprompter. Blah, blah, blah. No, he's an old man that has dementia. That's it.

It's not a hologram. He seems perfectly lucid to me, and I think he is handling this Ukraine situation with a plomb. So, what was your favorite part of what he did? The sanctions against poor people, because you want to incentivize them to kill themselves? Yes. To take over? You've got to make the citizenry suffer if they have bad leadership well i want to know get that guy out where do you draw the moral if everybody in russia is happy they're not going to affect change so you want to personally uh leverage the financial system against the impoverished, oppressed, so that they commit acts of suicidal terrorism against a dictator.

Yes. And you think you can now judge. I'm the good guy. Yeah. Yes. I'm the good guy. When you have stupid people who have elected stupid leadership. Oh, you know about that. I know.

Well, you have to show them the consequences of their actions and then that will affect change. So yes, if the American people start to suffer as you seem to think, they're already suffering. Then they'll vote Biden out.

But they're not suffering. Whatever we're suffering is not nearly... Biden rigged the election anyway. Oh my God. You love rigged elections. You love Putin. Fuck anyway. Oh my God. You love rigged elections. You love Putin. Fuck you. Do your problem, you tyrant.

What did you think about Biden saying we're all going to have to pay for what we're doing here? It's going to make prices go. He's being right up front with the American public. So Putin's the reason that inflation's happening. Yes. No, inflation was already happening, but this is not going to help But we have to send a message To this guy

You can't just let a guy If there's a sovereign nation that says we're independent You can't just let a guy take it over and go well He didn't take it over he sent guys in there So Ukraine wouldn't fuck with them He's going to take it over That's his ultimate goal Why would he do that?

He has his plans he's going to attack the fucking capital And he's going to say this is all part of Russia now. He didn't stage a coup. The U.S. staged a coup in the Ukraine. They're all Russians. They were part of the USSR. They don't want to be Russians anymore. They have established that we want to be the independent nation of Ukraine. That's like saying Texas doesn't want to be Americans.

That's like saying Texas wants to be Mexico, which is not true. If Texas said, fuck off America, we're on our own, and Mexico sent a bunch of peacekeeping troops in there, I would say, fucking thank you, Mexico. Viva La Raza. Yeah. What would you say? Oh, fucking Zedillo's. What a nightmare. Not taking it,

fucking defending it from America that will freak out and throw a big hissy fit because one of its precious states got away from it. We have a very different view of world politics, it seems. What do you think? If Texas said, okay, fuck off. If Texas wants to secede? Yeah.

I think we could allow for that. Oh, you'd allow that? But Biden wouldn't. If the people vote for it if that's the will of the people that's what happened with the civil war yeah but that was a while ago what do you agree that you would handle things uh diplomatically i think we'd find a solution really yeah either that or we'd say no well yeah they would say no yeah texas has a bunch of oil the problem is the texans aren't gonna you fight for their independence. They don't want it that bad. They like being a part of America.

Okay. Look, if an actual war started, maybe, but I don't think the Texans would ever fight. They're a bunch of... I don't know what they are. Sexes? They seem to think they all care. Well, they're either steers or queers, I heard.

They seem to carry the spirit of the Alamo. I don't buy it. I think they'll roll over the second we say Okay, but we're going to take away all the Taco Bells and Pizza Huts We're going to take away all the You can't get Amazon Prime anymore You see they're trying to take Apple

Apple Store away from Russians too Citizens That'll piss them off According to you, they didn't even vote for this I think hurting the poor is a very noble thing to do in pursuit of a greater aim. Somebody, in Ukraine, they're going around taking men, grabbing them and not letting them leave the country, saying, kiss your wife goodbye. You're fighting for us now. I haven't seen that.

I think they're volunteering. Volunteering? Have you ever seen people forcibly conscripted? Yes, it's called conscript. Yes. I have not seen that well you saw they're not letting young men leave the country right

no I haven't seen that I mean it's very possible wait how do you feel about that what are they just saying you can't leave the country yeah why cause you could hold a gun

yeah cause you could fight the bad guys who are them not us who is making you stay here man desperate times desperate times. Desperate times, Dick. So once you've decided who's good and bad. If only that madman hadn't forced them into this horrible situation.

I know, by protecting those two territories that say we want to be free. I'm not saying Ukraine's a perfect country. I'm just saying that on the whole, whole you can't tell a sovereign country like hey we're just coming in we're taking over we're gonna bomb your people well he went into other countries that said they're separate who putin sent guys into those new territories and said we're not with them anymore who said that like a handful of guys in there no they've been saying it for a while it's called the mints the minsk like they've been independent for a while it's just how they negotiated their independence.

But they don't represent the whole of Ukraine. No, it's just them. But that's complicated. He sent troops into them, and then Ukraine attacked them. But that's not why he's doing it. He's not doing it to support their glorious independence. He's doing it because he's worried about NATO. Yes.

Okay, well then. I don't want NATO anywhere near me. I want NATO near me. Good NATO. What about cops? All our allies Do you want cops around you? Fund the police

Double fund the police That's what I I know you don't feel that way Double fund the police No I do not want to double fund the police 2x Okay

Here's my problem Flip flops breaking Flip flops breaking Look at your sandals Well that beats Putin all day long You get salt water on them Yeah Ruined

You get a crappy pair of flip flops, right? Yeah You blow right through it I'm gonna be honest with you I don't own a single pair of flip flops Why not? I don't know, nothing about them appeals to me What do you mean?

The breeziness? The ease of use? Putting them on? Putting them on? Putting them off? Maybe I would like them. I got extra ones. What size shoe are you? 13.

I got some XLs that I can't wear. I have giant feet. Yeah, these might fit you. I'll get you into the flip-flop lifestyle. All the socks that go sizes 6 to 12. 6 to 12, 6 to 12. Yeah. You can't get a size 13 sock.

I just make two. Maybe I'm strangling my foot right now. There's bigger socks. Yeah, I could go to like a big and tall store. You have to go to a big and tall store to get big socks? I couldn't find big socks at the store. They don't have them at the like Walmart. They got size 13 at Target socks?

No, the size is not. It's like. I know it's a range. Yeah, it's a range They got the bigger one I've never seen the 13 plus at the store I'll give you these Man, put some socks on

In a sandal You're telling me the flip flops fall apart Why would I even want one? That's a big problem Because the flip flops are so comfortable To wear That we have to endure it that's why it's such a big problem yeah because you can't go back to once you've gotten flip-flops

you can't go back once you flop you can't stop once you flop you can't stop yeah you would get cheap ones you that feel great look cool bust right through them done and then you're stranded somewhere with busted out flip flops from the side, from the front. Everyone's looking at you. Everyone's jealous of you and your flip flops normally laughing at you, looking at you and pointing. You're walking around with one foot like an idiot, like you're trying

to get attention. Is this something you encounter a lot? It happens to me a lot because I've worn flip flops my whole life since I was like 16. I said, fuck you shoes! Flip flops are the future. Yeah. I'm only doing flip flops. The shoe of the future, America. Only flip flops.

Even at school, I would wear them. Yeah. Really. Is a croc a flip flop? I'll count it. Okay. I'll allow it. All right.

Anything that's not a shoe. I've also never worn a croc. Well, start with flip flops. I'll start with flip flops. I have crocs, but I'm an advanced flip flop wearer. Do you have to insert it between the big toe and the other toe? No, the ones I'm going to give you are not like that. Okay.

They're just right over the top, like Adidas. They're Puma brand ones. I've seen those. But those have their own problems because you can blow out the side, and then with a normal flip-flop, you can get by. If one tongue blows out, or the other one, or the middle one, you can get by getting back to your car. If one tongue blows out or the other one or the middle one,

you could get by getting back to your car. But if you're wearing the saddle ones and it blows out, you're fucked. I feel like being a giant-sized man, I'm going to destroy these things in about five seconds. How do you do with regular shoes? Not very well. Do you blow through shoes? I blow through shoes.

Haven't you seen big? Haven't you seen when I came over that one time, my shoes had like huge holes in them or whatever? I just assumed they were old. I mean, they're old. I also just don't buy shoes very often. Video game consoles. I do.

Stockpile. Oh, man. I bought one yesterday. Someone gives you a flat tire. It's all fun and games, right? Flat tire. Irresistible to give someone a flat tire. Step on the back of their flip-flop.

Blown right through. Oh, no. Destroys them. And then you got to like, buddy, come on. How common is the flip-flop? Is this a shoe a lot of people enjoy? It's not common enough. Yeah.

I don't know why. People are so uptight. They got to be wearing shoes everywhere. Right. But flip-flops are the way to go. They're worried about their feet. They're protecting their feet from something. Uh-uh.

I will say this I hate a shoe with a I'm done with the shoelace thing it's always been a mistake oh yeah yeah you know what

once Velcro showed up like that was it the gold standard if you even needed it all or just slip them right on what about like the frog head which one

what's that remember that shoe no the frog Velcro head that went over your... I think I know what you're talking about and I approve.

Do they make them in adult sizes? I want Heelys. I've also never owned a pair of Heelys. Do you know how to skate? Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah, get a pair of Heelys. I think I would have fun with them. They have ones that will attach to your shoes Oh yeah And you can just like have them on

They call them strap-ons Is it weird for Just go to a If you see an adult Heelying around a mall though right Everyone goes What the fuck is that That guy's fucking awesome

Look at that I love the idea of gliding Yeah Why have I never gotten Heelys I should get some right now I don't know But I'm gonna hook you up with those flip-flops And when they break

You're gonna know Cause you're gonna love them You will never love a shoe I've never gotten Heelys. I should get some right now. I don't know, but I'm going to hook you up with those flip-flops and when they break, you're going to know because you're going to love them. You will never love a shoe like you love a flip-flop that you've had. Pick them up. Go to the beach. You get a nice expensive pair

that won't blow out. Take them to the beach. Fucking ruined by salt water. This could be one of those problems where I come in in a week and I go, Dick, I have to say,

vote it up because I will have experienced this pain firsthand. Okay. I'm excited. What's your, what's your non-poo-poo Well, I mean,

I don't know if I am excited because you're telling me I'm going to experience disappointment. You're selling me this shit. Yeah, but everything, like, it's like getting a pet. It will die eventually

and you're not going to like it. Jesus Christ. Fucking dark. Could you use any, could you use any fucking example? Like, oh, you get an ice cream cone eventually There's no more ice cream like that would have been nice because it was worse than that

I don't want to feel I don't it's worse than my dog sits on me. Yeah, like oh I talked to her I'm gonna be so sad when you're dead. Yeah, please live forever. I don't want you to die I'll die when you die Yeah, I said the same shit to my cats I go oh why can't you just live forever I was just kidding I don't say that You really say that? Sometimes I really say that too

I go oh man I'm gonna be so fucking sad when this cat's dead I love my cat man she sleeps with me every night She's incredible But you know what's not incredible Dick? A little problem I'm calling The price of admission Alternate title rich kid nation dick we are becoming okay a land of experiences reserved for the rich the poor man has been

barred access to traditional uh exciting activities fun time activities, which are now priced well beyond the budget of the average American. That's true. I find it tragic. Well, I have a number of examples. Sanctions on poor people. If only our poor people would rise up and murder the people that have done this to them, right?

If only that Trump guy hadn't gotten us into this horrible fucking inflation quagmire with his nonsense. Oh, Trump caused inflation too. Yeah, of course. Come on. Who else? With his lack of response to anyway. I'm not going to bring up any of that because then I immediately lose.

Let's focus on the topic at hand. No, I agree with you on this one. I'll say a bigger part of the problem, though, is not just inflation because these prices have outpaced inflation. In fact, I would say a lot of the times it's just greed, just simple economic greed of let's take as much as we can because why? The rich people are happy to pay the prices. Poor people, yeah, they can ride it home and watch a Disney Plus show.

Sports tickets are a great example. Used to be able to just go to a ball game. Yeah. Have a good time. And beers are like 18 bucks a piece. We've seen the price of the beer go. Yeah. At one point can you imagine going back in time and telling somebody oh yeah we pay $18 for

beer at the football stadium. They go oh is that inflation? We would go no a beer elsewhere is $2. $3. No. Well not at home. At a bar 5, 6 whatever bucks. You know You're at a bar Five six Whatever bucks Yeah

You're paying three times as much Season ticket prices For NFL games Have gone up An average of 68% Every year? Since 2006

Oh okay So uh 15 years But for the top teams It has gone up as much as Over 100% Yeah The Saints, 90%.

Let's see. Who's a good team? It's fucking bullshit that major leagues teamed up with TV studios in the way they have. Well, also that they've turned these ballparks into, you know how now it's like, oh, well, we have like a fine dining restaurant. We have all these VIP skyboxes. Shitty soapbox. like oh well we have like a fine dining restaurant we have all these yeah skyboxes so pop that's all they're focused on is uh yeah the rich whales that they can bring in to spend they don't care

about you and your family like i'm on the mailing list for those now like i got pitched a season ticket package for the dodgers yeah and it would like the cheap one it was like seven grand or something like it was um for like a vip suite for a day for a day like for a very small amount of time yeah i really fucking hate and i really fucking hate that the government pays for their stadium at all yeah it gives them huge tax breaks for all of it yeah they're making these owners of these teams are making insane money a good example would be the Packers. 2006 average ticket was $60. Currently $130 for an average ticket. That's a 120% increase.

That is well past the pace of inflation. This is just simple. Eh, fuck these guys. We can fuck them, so why won't we? There's no reason not to. I mean, and college is just as good. It's just like there's so many bullshit rules yeah and uh and going to a college game hurdles to see them yeah i mean they're not like they're

not but there could there could easily be four times the amount of professional teams at everything and it would be fine all of this is just uh trying to see it used to be i want to say at some point it was like well we want people to come have fun that was like part yeah like yeah you want to make money but you're making obscene amounts of money it's like yeah but we want people in our community to be able to enjoy a sports game go see a concert now it's just we just care about the money eat shit concert tickets dick in the past two decades have risen from an average of 2525 for a concert ticket to $90, almost a four times concert price ticket increase. Again, far outpacing inflation.

And then here's one which I've been talking about a lot. That's why I bring up this idea of Rich Kid Nation. The Disney ticket. The Disney ticket, Dick. Dick, do you know how much a Disney ticket was in 1971? 1971? $5? Let's go all the way back.

$3.50. Okay. With tax? $1 for children. Amazing. Now adjust that for inflation. How much should a Disney ticket be? Do you have any idea?

Hold on. $18? $24. Not bad. Okay. $24. The bad. $24. The current price of a Disney ticket at its lowest is $105. If you want the pass that lets you get into the other park of Disneyland. The park with the good rides.

The one with the good rides. $220. They go, yeah, it's only $100 unless you want. We did make a second park, which is directly next door and is basically just the same part continued can i go over there no you only paid for the one park but it's only it's only 100 it's 220 because what are you gonna do not go to the other fucking half of the park so fucked did you see the disney uh community that thing oh we're gonna talk about we gotta talk about that a little bit i didn't get any stats on it but we should i was gonna say real quick i mean you're not bringing into you

got a factor for okay do you want to stay at a disney hotel you got three kids with you okay the cheapest room at these disney hotels is like five hundred dollars a night uh you're paying a hundred dollars a person for your family family of four is is going to pay at least $2,000 to go to Disney for a day. Psychopathic. And these people are part of it. It's like an idiot tax. These people are part of a cult

because they are starting Disney communities, right? Where it's going to be living communities that are all Disney themed. You know, they've tried that before though. Well, that's Epcot Center. That was the original plan of Epcot

and then it changed. But then they did make Disney's celebration village in Florida, which fell apart. And then they voted to like divest themselves from Disney. Like they had like a homeowner's meeting and they're like, Disney's fucking everything up and like severed ties because Disney can't run this shit again. They're going to bilky every fucking, I can't imagine. Can you imagine paying Disney prices for fucking this shit. Again, they're going to bilk you every fucking, I can't imagine.

Can you imagine paying Disney prices for fucking tickets and being like, I want a homeowners association run by these psychopaths? Well, that's what a homeowner, like, bundled homeowners, Medicare, everything, that's all Disney prices. Yeah. So it's a perfect synergy of charging.

Yeah. It's crazy that people just submit to this. And I, of course, have been talking about the new Star Wars hotel experience where the price is so fucking astronomical. It blows my mind, Dick. It's like six grand. Star Wars. That's all you do in that thing. Star Wars.

Okay. Yeah. I've made a lot of videos about this. Okay. Because I don't understand it. Okay. This whole thing drives me nuts they've made these people are crazy like the ones the one percent are are getting so rich and retarded

and it's infecting their brain yeah um that now they go oh there's a i can get a vip nfl ticket for twenty thousand dollars for a day i don't care My company's getting it. The problem is that the American experience is deviating into individual and corporate. And the government is dumping money into corporations nonstop via bond purchases. So they just spend money on whatever and then write it off if it doesn't work. Or just keep stacking it if it does. So these corporations are just buying up tickets and garbage for them. Oh, yeah. Big corporate events and everything else.

Can I sit in that box? No, AT&T bought 10,000 years of this box. It's 0%. Like, when you say 0% interest, it's like, well, oh, that's nothing. Yeah, I'll have it. How much is it? Doesn't matter. It's 0% interest, it's like, well, oh, that's nothing. Yeah, I'll have it. How much is it? It doesn't matter. It's 0% interest.

I'll take it. It really is just a complete lack of touch with. Again, I am hoping this Disney Star Wars hotel fails. I'll tell you this. How bad could it fail? The cheapest cabin is $4,800 for two nights. For two people, two nights. If you have a full party of four you four wife and two kids

two kids six thousand dollars for two nights in star wars and it's a concrete bunker where you pretend to be a jedi and you pretend you're on a spaceship i'm starting to think nuclear armageddon is not a terrible yeah it's more of a solution than anything because i do want it like i really want it i just want to reach a point. Look, I understand that capitalism, it's all about, can I get a little bit more for this? Can I charge an extra dollar? It'll help, you know, with my overhead.

But at a certain point, the corporate greed has reached a point where you're like, does anybody, is the only, I know this is cynical, but yes, the only motive of capitalism is unfettered greed. Why does it have to be that way?'t be like you know what we could charge a little bit less and i'll take a bit home a little less of a paycheck or uh we'll open this up because the executives aren't using it that weekend we can give it to make-a-wish kids the problem is capitalism is ungoverned by any morality. No, it is governed by the law. And when the law is written by companies, they will write it in such a way that maximizing suffering is a business model.

Right. That's the problem, though. All our products feel like they were designed not to make us happy, but to maximize our suffering. Yes. Because companies wrote the... Like, if the laws didn't exist and companies ran out of money, you could kill the CEO. Like, where's my money?

Yeah. Well, I'm going to... Like, my law is that I'll break your... That I'll wring it out of you. Yeah. Like, well, I passed a law that says... I got, like, the U.S. military that says I can just declare bankruptcy. Like, well, that, I passed a law that says I got like the U S military that says I can just declare bankruptcy.

I'm like, well, that doesn't, that's not capitalism. Capitalism is who's going to pay the most to fucking kick it out of you. Yeah. I'll pay. I got 20 bucks.

And I'm putting in an extra five. Yeah. Me and Vito got 25 bucks to kick the bankruptcy out of you. Yeah. Um, it's a very complex, sick Yeah. It's a very complex. It's a sick system. It's a sick system because it's also, you go to the ballpark,

and maybe you spend the money, but then you come out. Imagine how much more fun you would have if you didn't have to think about, can't believe I just paid $300 to get beers and pretzels. That's why I do acid games. You put all that out of your fucking head. No, because you don't have to buy beer. If you do like a half You don't have to Half a tab of acid

You don't need any liquid No two or three beers Yeah Before I was going to games And spending Two hundred three hundred dollars On beers like you're saying Yeah

And then just being an asshole Getting thrown out But half a tab of acid Which sounds fun No it's not fun No No Not at this age

Yeah Not Not at this age Getting kicked out of one game. That's fun, getting kicked out of 40 games. You got a problem. How many games have you been kicked out of? Once you have to go to a seminar to get back into the stadium, that's like a fan of behavior.

You have to go to Dodger fan awareness training. When they take a picture of your ID, the fucking guy is taking a picture of your ID. I thought this was American. I'm sorry, I thought this was America. Yeah, Habitat by Acid. That's fantastic. That gets you nice and calmed down. Yeah.

Daddy Dick can enjoy the game in his own little wonderland. Yeah. Or maybe you don't need a VIP suite. Maybe the real problem is we just need to legalize Acid. Then you can enjoy any experience for a low, low cost. I agree with you. Why? That it's horrible.

Why? I don't understand sitting around and going like, how can we make sure that poor families, and again, I hate the poor as we've established,

but how do we make sure that they and their children are denied access to funding experiences? Like that whole hotel is dumb. Yeah. But they needed to make it that dumb to bring in the people who would spend dumb money on it

that's not even theirs. They need the whales who are going to roll through and buy every single thing in the gift shop. Because the company's just way bigger than it should be. Like, it's about cartoons. But they've used their money and their influence to extend copyright law needlessly. Yeah.

Like there shouldn't be any copyright law. Well. Why? That's something we can talk about sometime. Horseshit. You need limited copyright law for small guys. Why? Because I don't want you taking my shit.

No one's interested. No, they might be. You don't know. You don't know what they're going to do. I don't trust. I want to protect For the small guys Against the big guys No no

See that fear that you have That's the original I've been tricked I've been tricked Well no Cause it's a valid fear But that's where Companies come in

And they get that fear And they're like I'm gonna play it out Everybody wants to steal your shit Everyone's afraid Of everyone stealing their shit And I'm gonna take it And make it the law

So I can do All kinds of Heinous shit There's gotta be There's gotta be A common sense middle ground If I write And I'm going to take it and make it the law so I can do all kinds of heinous shit. There's got to be a common sense middle ground. If I write a great song and next thing I hear Lady Gaga making a billion dollars from it, I'm not going to be happy about it. Who wrote Happy Birthday? Me.

Do you know? Michael Jackson. Do you know? It was like a school teacher like a billion years ago. What did she get? Not a goddamn thing. Well, no. But now they got this. You know, Happy Birthday is not under goddamn thing. Well, no, but now they got, you know,

Happy Birthday's not under copyright anymore, right? Yeah, but it never should have been. It never should have been, but that was because it was a mistake based on authorship, whatever. Look, some songs may, whatever. It's a complex topic. The point is I understand that companies want to make money. I just think that there's a common ground,

and this constant desire to, it's also this corporate desire of we have to, common ground's the problem. We have to increase revenues. We have to keep growing. We have to appease our shareholders. It's like, how about once it's a stable platform and the tickets are selling and everyone's happy,

you just go, that's good. Yeah. We don't need anything else, but no. You know who wanted to do that? Putin. All he wanted to do was have a country, sell oil

All he wanted was a nice pipeline through Germany to sell his oil to the world And they wouldn't give it to him. And these awful, awful people. All he wanted was that and for cops to leave him alone, and they wouldn't fucking do it They wouldn't fucking do it. He just wanted to defund the police Yes, all he wanted was no cops fucking around on my border all the time yeah did you even watch the super bowl halftime show uh the one where the the kneeling of the m&m no they were talking about all kinds of cop stuff watch it you should have you would learn something of that my problem dick again price of admission. Or Rich Kid Nation. I don't know.

Price of admission is probably... Well, now you seem to like both, so let's put both on. I'll put in parentheses like Rocket Man. Parentheses, I think it's going to be a long, long time. Yeah, yeah. Okay, my problems were nuclear war. Nuclear war. Nuclear war. And flip-flops breaking.

Flip-flops prone. Mine were Vladimir Putin. Vladimir the Bear Putin. Just put Vladimir Putin. You would like that guy if you talked to him. I'm sure he's a fun uncle in the way that some uncles are crazy and should not be in charge of world governments. Why not?

What's he done? He's poisoned people. He's locked up journalists and fucking protesters. We do not nearly. We have a whole system. Who's locked up right now that protested wrong? All of Abu Ghraib? Other than what's his fucking name?

Look what we did to Afghanistan. All of the January 6th guys just got locked up? Well, those guys were punching cops. No, they weren't. And they led a riot, as we say. They led an insurrection. All right. And what else?

The price of admission. The price of admission. And Rich Kid Nation. Rich Kid Nation. Okay, everybody. Go to patreon.com slash biggest problem to support the show. Go to biggestproblem.show to vote. And remember, this week you're voting on whether or not you support fascism.

So, good luck. I trust you guys to make the right choice. You're talking about Justin Trudeau. Yeah, Trudeau. That's who we're talking about. I mean... That's a whole separate thing, and I'm not saying I agree with Trudeau.

I don't know why he did that. Yeah, but you don't hate him. He did the same stuff. I dislike him. He didn't kill anybody. Well, what do you do when you arrest people with families? What's the difference? Oh, you're murdering their souls.

It's a whole different fucking thing. No, you're killing them. You're freezing their fucking bank accounts. How do you buy food when they freeze your fucking bank accounts? Did Putin freeze anybody's bank account? He just arrested them like a man. This is not a Trudeau problem. That's a whole separate

fucking thing, all right? The emergency acts thing is stupid. I don't know why he did this. But he's evil. Sure. He's a... What do you mean, sure?

He's a fucking idiot. And he's just in charge of shitty Canada. Yeah. Putin's in charge of Mother Russia. People fucking with him all the time.

All the time. Trudeau just sits around and lets the U.S fucking with him all the time. All the time. Trudeau just sits around and lets the U.S. protect him. You can't say Putin is better because he didn't invoke a fucking emergency act or whatever.

I'm saying he's better because he's getting fucked with at all times. I could do Trudeau's job. I couldn't do Putin's job. I'm like, I don't know, man.

I would fucking lose him. I would just nuke, nuke, nuke, nuke, nuke, fuck you. I don't know how you haven't brought in any of this stupid trucker bullshit as a problem by now. I would fucking lose it I would just nuke Nuke Fuck you I don't know how you Haven't brought in any Of this stupid

Trucker bullshit As a problem by now I save stuff for my The stupidest thing The stupidest thing Was when they're like We're gonna kidnap Your dog

So I'm like What are you guys doing Yeah can you believe that I was like I was like Do you guys want The worst PR possible Cause even me

I'm like Those truckers Are fucking idiots We're gonna kidnap Your pets And release You know Probably kill them In seven days We're gonna kill them I'm like What the fuck these truckers are fucking idiots. We're going to kidnap your pets and release, you know, probably kill them. In seven days, we're going to kill them.

I'm like, what the fuck? Well, how long am I going to be in prison? We don't know. We don't know, but we're going to kill an innocent animal to punish you. Oh, my God. That was pretty bad. I don't know if he was going to kill them or rehome them. That's worse than Putin.

I don't know if it's worse. He's killing people. Fuck people. Yeah, well, that's true. Why don't you fuck with dogs? All right. Here is, let's do some voicemails. Hey, Dick.

Hey, Vito. Hopefully you can hear me. I'm driving right now. But here's the biggest problem. Rubbernecking and this whole fucking justification on it. I'm right now on the highway. There's a huge amount of fucking backup. And what is it for?

Oh, for a wreck, not really that bad, on the other fucking, like, on the other side of the, uh, of the highway, okay, not even on our side, everybody's just slowed down to just stare at it, you know what even, like, makes me, uh, fucking pissed about it, is that I saw a TV show or something like that that was, like, talking about it, and it's like, oh, society's degrading to the point where, you know, people would see a wreck like that and not even just turn their heads and look. Like, that's just such a sad sign. Like, as if rubbernecking is a good thing in society, like, it shows you care or there's morals, there's nothing that justifies rubbernecking Take a little quick look for like two seconds

And move the fuck on Especially if there's no car wrecks in front of you Fuck these people I mean I am a rubbernecker myself Me too, so is he, fuck off It's fun I don't think people take that I don't know, I never seem to slow down to do it

Sometimes it looks awesome Sometimes you see a car that's like flipped over And you're like how often am I going to fucking get to see that? See, there's like a body there. And what? Oh, dude, I have a

video. It's hanging out. Maybe, dude, because I'll take a video of somebody else's driving. I had a great video where you drive. I'm like, oh, there's

an ambulance and there's a guy getting wheeled into an ambulance. It's an SUV that's completely landed on its roof. And I'm like, oh, that was poetic.

This is beautiful. I saw one where it was a wreck. Yeah. And I slow I slow was poetic this is beautiful i saw one where was a wreck yeah and i slow i slowed down almost to a stop and then it was a little bit down the way there was an ambulance flipped over i yeah and there was another ambulance i love it they were loading loading the ambulance people into yeah i'm one of those guys i go looking for videos of uh people getting killed on the fucking internet it's's fascinating to me. Yeah, come on. Tragedy is just fascinating. Fuck off with the rubber.

Go back to 1990 with that rubberneck and shit. If you saw a dead body, you're not going to look. Come on. I'm stopping. I'm stopping. I do. If I see a really cool wreck and it's not on the highway, but in the middle of town, I'll stop, take out the phone, try to get some pictures.

Okay. Maybe I'm sick. Dick, Vito, what's up veto just wanted to drop you a line and give you massive props on an absolute junk of a problem last week just listening to dick fucking stretch himself mentally in ways he had never done before just hey why can't why can't black people exist in a magic universe so everything can exist except black people? I mean, of course.

I mean, of course. What the fuck? Not elves. If you're mad that a black bird can exist in the world of the rings, congratulations, you're retarded. I'm not mad. I like that caller. Some people get it.

What was that impression of me? I don't talk like that. Well, that's what you sound like on the inside it's the whiny fucking bitch well he can have dragons but a black person has to evolve on a separate continent across a period of a million you don't fucking know well the toads did you don't know how the black toads the black toads and mario are in sand land okay they're in a sandy land so when their son lord of the Rings show comes out and they say he's from the fucking east of the...

Sand elves? He's east of Mistville Mountain where the sun is in the sky all the time. But you guys can't wait for that. But elves are magic. You see a black elf on a billboard and you go, it's woke. Oh my God. How are we going to explain it? They're advertising it as woke.

The black dwarf? I'm gonna wait. Black dwarf? That would have been no problem. Alright. Black dwarf makes less sense than a black elf because they live under the fucking ground or whatever. Black elf makes way more sense.

Elves live outside all the time. They live in forests and plains. You're right. Black elf makes no sense. They live in forests and plains. You're right. Black elf makes no sense. No, black elf makes sense. Black dwarf makes no sense. Black dwarf, there is going to be more to explain, and I look forward to finding out what magic sequence it events.

Somehow the black dwarves got stranded on the earth and had to turn black. Maybe it's a separate dwarven society where they have a big hole in the cave where the sun comes in. And they didn't get fast or anything? Yeah, they didn't get fast. Well, I'm just wondering why they...

Why can't they make a layup? I didn't say that. She should be really tall. Duncan hoops. And Vito, how does having a black dwarf or a black elf make it worse i don't even know where to begin with that these are small tiny communities in a medieval setting don't have fucking airplanes how the fuck is this yeah they don't have airplanes community even existing in the first place you're such a fucking retard. Yeah, there's no black people on our continent. This is established

lore written a hundred years ago by Tolkien himself. It's established road lore from a dead old man. We know exactly why the elves are who they are and what they are and what they look like and the course is the same. Why? Just like a black person destroys the immersion that you can get from these fucking stories

or that you would get from these stories. The immersion. I'm not immersed. It throws you out of the world because it's violating the rules of. The illusion of that abyss. It's violating the rules of the world. What are the rules? What are the rules? It's not like they're going to say, oh, this bitch is cursed. Because they're saying black skin is a curse. And they're never going to say that, Vito.

They're just having them in there. Oh, I'm not immersed in the lore. Oh, Tolkien is rolling in his grave Oh You're a fucking nerd You're a worse nerd than me Only fucking nerds care about any of this shit You fucking retard

No one gives a shit But you care about like Disneyland prices Yeah, because I want to go to Disneyland Do you really? I've never been to Disneyland What? It's too expensive Oh my god, okay I want to go to Disneyland. Do you really? I've never been to Disneyland. What? It's too expensive.

Oh, my God. Okay. I'll go sometime. I grew up here, so I had to take every ride. I hate lines. That's the other thing. I've been reading the lines are like two hours long for every ride. What do you hate? You hate lines?

I hate... Waiting is a problem on the biggest problem in the universe that people should vote up. Okay. I don't do lines. Not a linesman dick veto you fucking retard you you piece of shit when you say stuff like oh man i gotta take these sponsorships these ads because i gotta put a roof over my head i do buddy you've got two patreons or at least one and a half yeah you own multiple youtube channels earning revenue yeah you've got a side hustle selling video game consoles yeah you're struggling to put a roof over your head maybe stop buying bing bing wahoo toys secondly

is just a shitty product no it's great that's why people are getting mad at you no one maybe a few people you know about yeah But no one is really getting mad at Skillshare sponsorships Alright, no one's getting mad at Squarespace game has more chance than Champions tell me about right now. Yeah. Gouging you for as much money as possible. My God, it's a one-minute plug. Just skip over it. Just skip forward one minute of the video.

They pay me $1,000 to do nothing. You haven't even played it yet. Oh, my God. You're selling a product, and people go to you like, oh, I wonder what that Star Wars hotel is. Just skip the fucking ad. There's an extension

you can plug in that automatically skips over it. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to fucking kill you. Shut the fuck up. I'm so tired of this shit. I have so many comments. I'm unsubscribing because you let a Russian company give you a thousand

dollars to do nothing. They're Russian? All of you. Yes, they are Russian. What the fuck? Hey man, well, I got to take the money where I can get it. Point is America. Uh,

yeah, I do sponsored content sometimes. Don't watch it. Don't watch it. Just let me take the thousand dollars. It's free money that they're handing me. What should I? No.

He's saying that the game sucks though I respect my audience too much The game is fine I hear so many people But you said you didn't play it No I'm not gonna play that shit What do you mean it's fine?

I'm not gonna play that I just hear people I just hear people say they really like it No Look the game killed children Every time you play it Fine But it is a popular game

What about those kids that Biden killed? Those seven kids In Afghanistan every time you play it fine. But it is a popular game. What about those kids that Biden killed? Those seven kids in Afghanistan that he killed. It was for the greater good. How's that not worse than Putin's killing regular men? He didn't order,

hey, go kill the kids. It was the fucking accident. Look, we fuck up. It was an accident? Russia would have killed them on purpose. But it didn't. Oh my oh my god you're right i'm always wrong this is such a stupid gotcha because biden because an airstrike by our shitty military which always fucks everything up that means that biden's as bad as putin you wouldn't so if you're putin you want a military

that always fucks up right on your border? I don't want that. Like, you guys are fucked. Get a whole country away from me. All I know is that right now, if you use the description code on my site, you're going to get a free bonus champion, 300 gold, five energy pellets, and an elf is going to suck your dick. A black elf will suck your dick. Raid Shadow Legends. Or you'll suck its dick A black elf will suck your dick Oh

Or you'll suck its dick I don't fucking know Anything black and dick related is inappropriate No they like it No they don't What about the black guys with regular dicks They're okay with it No

Thanks a lot for saying black guys have enormous dicks Here I am A guy with a regular sized dick Here's the point No, like, oh, great. Thanks a lot for saying black guys have enormous dicks. Here I am, a guy with a regular sized dick. Here's the point. Everybody who comes to me complaining about my sponsorships, they're not going away. I'm going to take the free money. Just skip ahead in the video. It's the same as watching the ads you watch on YouTube anyway.

There's no fucking difference. But it's in addition to that. Okay, so you skip those ads. Skip this one. Cause you're too lazy to press the fucking arrow key on your keyboard four times. Can't you just stop buying toys? Like that guy was saying, I want toys. I deserve toys. It is the only, there's nothing else for me to do on this planet. Dick. I am. I have run out of anything that brings me joy, joy, other than these short endorphin boosts of opening a garbage Amazon package and then throwing it in the corner and buying something else. Okay? I have nothing else.

So just let me. This is my only drug. Just let me have my toys and my garbage and my bullshit. Okay. As sponsored by Raid Shadow Legends. The greatest mobile game of all time. Here's another one. And then we'll do super chats.

Hey, Dick. Uh, I got a question for Vito. Uh, did he vote for Biden to be a pussy in the face of the whole Ukrainian? Yes. I voted for him to be a pussy.

Yeah. Which one did you vote for? I need to know which so I can make fun of him when both happen. How was he a pussy? What pussy thing did Biden do? Well, he said, no, we're not sending troops in. Yeah, we're not sending troops in.

Nobody's sending troops in. No, but if he wasn't a pussy, he'd be like, hey, you better stop fucking around. We might. Fucking might. So he didn't threaten World War III, so he's a pussy it only works if it's a threat he can't complain about starting world war three and then you say well biden didn't threaten to start world war three so he's a pussy yes the nukes only work

as a threat oh my god they don't work to use because then everyone's dead they only work if you go in if you fuck around i will nuke your fucking house i swear fucking god and he goes are you serious yeah i'm fucking i'm right here i'm right one of these two buttons nukes your ass the other one should have been the other one nukes me i don't i don't even care i'm just gonna go we need a wild card in there to say crazy shit because then everybody's on edge all the fucking time on edge oh my god not everybody thank you just the leader of the country you want to go like i don't want to fuck with that guy everyone in the audience a little bit of common sense a little bit of uh humanitarian love for your fellow man who do not support these renegades and mad men and blame those who are getting fucking killed right now thanks to you. Yeah, fuck you. Women are getting

blown up in their houses. Yeah. Kids are getting kicked across like footballs. By Putin. Putin's doing it. It's not Biden's fault. The Ukraine is doing it. Oh my god! Alright. Are you ready for Super Chats? Yeah, let's read some Super Chats.

Blow it up. Hold on. Yeah, blow it up for me and thanks for everybody to come and buy don't forget you can check out our patreon at patreon.com slash biggest problem and uh vote on the problems which will be up immediately after the show hopefully at biggest problem dot show yeah uh oh let me go back to the beginning, sorry. And did we mention the World War II flags bit? Is it just a great one? Yeah. Keep mentioning it, though. Well, I'm saying if you go to our YouTube channel,

you should watch that clip. I've laughed so many times at that one. USA. All right. Wait, am I starting at the top or the bottom? Pop quiz. Pop quiz for $4.99 says USA, USA, USA, USA, USA, USA, USA, USA, USA. Good.

I think he likes the USA. Toothless Ninja for five says, Spend this money on some speech lessons to learn how to say nuclear properly. No need. I think we've said it correctly every time, right, Dick? Nuclear. Nuclear. Nuclear.

Nuclear. Random username for two says, CIA installed a puppet government in the Ukraine in 2014. That is probably correct. Mike Hunt for five. Why would they not? Shut the fuck up. What do they get paid for if they're not doing that?

Oh my God. We're going to be on this forever. Mike Hunt for five. Yes. There is a great John Carpenter film about the Fed called They Live. Can we get a dictation? I love that. You ever see that movie?

No. With Rowdy Roddy Piper? The one with the sunglasses and the secret messages? It's a good one. ASE Presents The Great Riley for 10 says Ukraine is being invaded? Shit, this is the first time I'm hearing of it. Listen to my new Void Gazers podcast at

youtube.com slash ASE Presents and I will see you next weekend at Road Ridge. Is Road Ridge next weekend? Yeah. That snuck up on me. I got Maddox's coffin built today. Jesus Christ. So we can bury him. So bring, if you're coming to Road Rage, bring

your Maddox books and stuff. I gotta get my booster shot. You gonna get your booster dick? Yeah. Yeah, you gonna be all boosted up? I'll print it out. For your fucking super spreader event? Rare state cubes survive. It's it's over the pandemic is over that's why we had to have this right russia is a private company you can do what they want jokes aside would veto as a oh uh would like veto as a pka guest big ups to liquid richard uh pk is that one you always go on

right yeah good guys fun John Rips for five. Dick was right to make Vito his co-host. Vito is like Maddox, except he doesn't suck. He has the opinions of Maddox, but none of the brain damage to be far. No, no, no, no. You're not kidding me. Peter R for 10. Vito Trump placed sanctions on the Nord pipeline and financial.

These were rescinded by the grandpa you'd love to bone biden shut up about foreign policy you don't know about it i eat shit peter for five he also says veto not scared of the nuclear war because everyone knows cockroaches can survive the nuclear winter oh you can't credibly keep defending biden thank you were you doing it credibly? Was that your intention? I think I did it with great credentials Does that matter for you in politics being credible? Oh and by the way

It doesn't matter to me I'll be streaming Elden Ring when I get home If anyone wants to come watch that I don't know what channel I'll do it on Leo for two says Based As we are I want to give Daisy Ridley a

Something Something for two. It says, I'm rooting for Putin and I'm glad for Vlad. Make that fucking t-shirt. Oh, yeah. Purple monkey.

Fuck the US government. Oh, my God. They're doing the same stuff to him that they did to me. All right. Oh, he's a Nazi. Oh, take away his bank accounts. Take it to InfoWars.

You should be on InfoWars. I don't know why you're not. I'll take it over. You should. When Alex Jones gets killed by the CIA. I don't know why you're not I'll take it over You should When Al Shones gets killed by the CIA I don't know why you're not doing your own infotainment The government's locking people up in gulags Political gulags

Google logs Google logs What's the difference? De-platforming people San Jose Fucking Silicon Valley Just wipes out your whole existence If you think the wrong thing

Fuck the United States Fuck the government Fuck you God bless America Just wipes out your whole existence. If you, if you think the wrong thing, fuck the United States, fuck the government. Fuck you. God bless America. Purple monkey dishwasher for five. When will you do more Twitch piano streams? I miss hamster cam.

I don't know. Maybe soon reset and refresh real quick. Make sure we didn't miss any as always though. We like to thank our fans for coming by and showing their love. We had a great show here today and I think that's going to be the end of it, Dick. No, no, no. There's more. Oh, wait.

We got one more. Dozer Man for a big $50 US dollars. Thank you, Dozer Man. Vito is the biggest problem in the universe. She runs on emotion and has no ability to be rational. Well, I have a woman's ability to be rational, which is no ability to be rational. Well, I have no ability to be rational. I have a woman's ability to be rational, which is no ability whatsoever. Fadix the Great for five.

I don't know how you divvy up the Patreon money, but I want all five of my dollars to go to you, Vito. You owe Dick a roll of quarters every four months. What the fuck does that mean? You want to give all the money to me, and then I have to give you quarters. This is a reference I'm missing. I don't know.

A roll of quarters is like 20 bucks though, isn't it? I think he means four quarters every four months. A roll of quarters is 20 bucks.

I don't know. All right. I don't get it. And on that bombshell. Ending the show on a great joke from Fatix. Again,

biggestproblem.show. Vote on the from Fatix. Again, biggestproblem.show vote on the problems and patreon.com slash biggest problem. We love you guys. Peace and love. Take care of yourself.

No, I don't love you. Putin, as we all say. Putin's man. All hail Biden. He's resisting. Who's resisting? Putin.

He's actually resisting Hail Biden Good luck God bless Oh it's called a quartering he says Oh What's that? It's 10 bucks?

A roll of quarters is 10 bucks? Only? I think it's 20 Maybe it's 10? I A roll of quarters is 10 bucks? Only? I think it's 20. Maybe it's 10. I don't know. How many? What's a stack of quarters?

Yeah, I like that long. 10 bucks? 40 quarters? Maybe it's 10 bucks. 40 quarters, yeah. Okay, 10 bucks. That's fair. Vito, take the money you spent on toys and buy acid instead. You'll stop eating.

You can't eat on acid. That's true. I'll find a way I'll find a way