The Blindboy Podcast - The history of Ginger Nuts and understanding the Human Condition via the Temptation of Christ
Episode Date: March 5, 2025The history of Ginger Nuts and understanding the Human Condition via the Temptation of Christ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....
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Welcome to the Blind By-Pak guest. There's long evening sun outside.
You can't hear that fucking truck reversing, can you?
There's also a fucking truck reversing.
Can you hear that?
I'm gonna turn off the limiter.
See if you can hear the violence of that sound.
There's been a truck.
Can you hear it there?
Can you hear that? I've got the limiter turned off. I've had that all day long. Not even reversing. Not even, the truck isn't even reversing. It's
cleaning a window. There's men cleaning a window on a tall building. And here we go.
And here we go. You get that intermittent beeping. They're not even reversing. This, this. Now there's a seagull getting involved. So it's quite a noisy day. I've just turned off
my limiter so you could hear that properly. I'm gonna turn the limiter back on. Now I use a thing
called a limiter which technically cuts out background noise, but
it impacts how I speak. When I use a limiter, I have to be careful not to breathe audibly
because you get a weird sound like this. You see that? I can't laugh.
That's the limiter up at 100.
I can't laugh.
So what the limiter does is it only picks up when I'm speaking, but then anything that's
breathy, it cuts it out.
So if I breathe like...
It cuts it off.
And then when I laugh...
It sounds like if a cheese grater could masturbate,
and then this is what it sounds like
with no limiter at all.
You're just bare back in the environment there.
You're getting everything there, see?
The sound of my annoying fan, the sound of my computer, and luckily someone could fart
next door and you'd hear it. Now I'd prefer to record like this because you hear all of
my voice but then you get background noises so all you have to do is turn the limiter
back on so you get this, but that's too much limiter, so let's go.
About here.
Here's okay.
But still, I have to be careful about anything breathy.
So all day I'm dealing with the sound of a beeping, reversing truck, which is getting
in the way of recording.
The truck isn't even reversing.
It's lads washing the window of a large building.
The truck is stationary, but they have the beeping noise on, as if it is reversing.
And that truck beeping noise, the reverse beeping noise, it's known as the backup
beep.
Invented by a fella called Matsubaru Yamaguchi in Japan in 1963, and it's the same back-up beeping noise everywhere around the world.
And there's arguments that it doesn't work anymore. That in an urban environment you hear so many
trucks beeping and backing up every single day that we just ignore the noise. And also it's a
very easy noise for birds to mimic. So half the time when you think you hear a truck reversing,
it's a black bird, a black bird mimicking the sound of the truck reversing. And now
we've got a siren. Let's just let the siren do its thing before we turn the limiter back on. There we go. But yeah, you
get birds, you get blackbirds in particular, mimicking the sound of the backup beep from
trucks. And we don't really know why blackbirds do this. I read a very interesting study about mockingbirds in Texas over in America. But mockingbirds, they imitate many
sounds. Mockingbirds will imitate the sounds of other birds and whatever sounds they hear
in their environment. And as with blackbirds, it's the male, it's the male who sings, who sings all these songs. And the theory is that a male mockingbird,
the more songs and the more sounds
that this mockingbird can imitate,
then the greater that mockingbird's territory
and the more resources that it has access to.
It's like the mockingbird's song.
It's listing out everything, everything that it knows and everything that
it's heard. A bit like a hipster, a bit like a hipster who's trying to impress a woman
with how esoteric his knowledge of music is or how many films he knows or what books he's
read. And the researchers arrived at this assumption because they found that
the male mockingbirds in this area of Texas, the ones that had the largest
repertoire of mimic noises and songs, they also were the ones who had
territories that were larger and richer in food and resources
So the... Can you hear it?
Can you hear that beep?
So the blackbirds
The blackbirds that are fucking mimicking the sound of that backup beep in Limerick City
they're trying to attract a female blackbird, especially at this time of year and they're saying like
Did you know that the backup beep was invented by Matsubara Yamaguchi in 1963 in Japan but the female blackbird doesn't want to hear that. What the
female blackbird wants to hear is the blackbird doing impressions of frogs
because if the blackbird is doing impressions of frogs, then what he's saying is, I live
near a fucking pond I do, with an endless supply of slogs and snails and flies and insects.
Because I live beside a pond and to prove it to you, here's the noise of a frog. That's
gonna get a blackbird his whole. Not, do you like the sound of this truck? Well, be-be, listen to this.
Beep beep, beep beep.
Climb into my nest and we have a fuck.
That's what the blackbirds are saying.
That's what they're saying.
And then the female blackbirds are like,
what the fuck are you talking about?
What are you, I don't care about trucks or lorries
or the beeping noises that they make. I'm a blackbird, I don't care about trucks or lorries
or the beeping noises that they make.
I'm a blackbird, I don't even know what they are.
I don't even know what these things are.
I want to kill a snail with my beak and eat it.
Tell me about snails.
And then the male blackbird is,
he's like, I don't know anything about snails.
I live in an alleyway in Limerick City.
I don't know about snails.
I can tell you about some bins and car alarms,
maybe a siren.
I could have a crack at a pigeon.
Are you sure?
Are you sure you're not interested in?
Listen again, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
You're not into that, no?
But, nice actually can really harm
the reproductive behavior of birds. Urban noise pollution and artificial noises can reduce bird
populations they can reduce the fecundity of male birds. The closest thing, within the next five years, within the next five years, human
men are going to start getting catfished by AI. Artificial intelligence is going to get
so good that men are going to think they have an online girlfriend who looks like a real
woman and talks like a real woman, and he's gonna be spending his money buying her gifts
to try and impress the artificial intelligence woman that doesn't exist.
And that's what's happening to male urban blackbirds
who mimic the sound of lorries that are reversing.
The female blackbirds aren't interested in hearing this.
And that's how those noises are contributing to biodiversity collapse.
I'm liable to go down to the two lads. this and that's how those noises are contributing to biodiversity collapse.
I'm liable to go down to the two lads, I'm liable to go down to the two lads who are
washing windows and say that to them.
A. I can't record my podcast because you're beeping all day long.
B. You're cockblocking a lot of blackbirds, you selfish, selfish men. So I'm very happy
this week because I've been nominated for two awards. I made two pieces of television
last year. I made a documentary called Blind Boy, The Land of Slaves and
Scholars and I adapted one of my short stories, Did You Read About Arskin Fogarty?
and I adapted that into a short film and I made them both with my own
production company. I started a production company last year called
Cunlagh's Well which is named after the mythical well, the well of eternal
inspiration where the salmon of knowledge lived and where the goddess
Sinan, the poet, went to drink inspiration
from the water and the well rejected her because she was greedy and it overflowed
and carried her body all the way down through Ireland into the Atlantic to
form the River Shannon that flows through Limerick City. So I named my
production company Conla's Well after that Well.
And having my own production company, it sounds fancy but it's not that fancy.
It means creative control.
It means the only person you answer to is the commissioner and that's it.
You see, how making television works is if you're what's known in the industry as the
talent.
Talent is the person who appears
on screen or maybe the writer.
Let's just say you're a fucking comedian.
You're a comedian and you want your own TV show and you're up and coming.
Well usually what happens is it's a production company that approaches you.
One of the many production companies comes to you and says, would you like to make a
TV show?
I reckon we can get it on BBC.
So you say yes, and you're on the screen,
and you're writing, but it's the production company
that's commissioned by the TV channel.
And your production company might be a pack of pricks.
They might not be interested in getting your vision on screen.
They might be interested in taking that commission
and instead of producing the best piece of work they want to take big production fees and then
put fuck all money on screen. You can lose a huge amount of creative control and all of a sudden
the work that you've been making by yourself and the internet or your stand-up work is really good.
yourself on the internet, or your stand-up work is really good. But now this thing that you've made for television is not good at all. And that's a very, very common story.
That's a very common story. Like I've had production companies who I don't even know,
who I've never worked with, go to television channels on my behalf without even telling me and they will go to a television channel and pitch
a horrendous idea.
Male mental health with blind boy. Blind boy goes up a mountain with a lot of young men and they lift up logs and cry.
It's like reality television, but with men crying. No mention whatsoever about underfunded mental health services or structural inequality. Just performative slogans and cliches about men's mental health
and just opening up.
I've had a TV production company who I've never met go to a TV channel and pitch to
them the idea of a TV show where I interview people and I take my bag off.
I'm not wearing a bag, I'm using my real face.
An idea that I would never agree to, that I'd never do.
And then the TV production company will come to me and say,
hey, we got a commission.
This TV channel is interested in making this documentary
that we haven't told you about at all, that we never contacted you about.
And then I say, fuck off. Please don't pitch ideas to TV channels without asking me first.
I don't even know who you are. But then other times you get lucky and you meet a production
company full of like-minded, creative, nice people who want to make good TV and that exists as well. Well I've been making TV
since 2000 and fucking
nine I think, so that's
Jesus, 16 fucking years, Christ.
I started young, I've been making TV for 16 years
so finally I'm bypassing
all of that shit and now I have my own production company.
So if I make TV, the and now I have my own production company.
So if I make TV, the only person I have to answer to is the commissioner.
So my production company has been nominated for two awards now.
I've only made two things with this production company this year, and they've both been nominated
for awards.
So I'm very, very happy with this information.
It's the RTS Awards, which is the Royal Television Society,
which I don't know why it's called Royal, because it's Irish nominations,
but I think they're the wing of a larger television society
in which the Brits are probably involved.
I'm gonna have to just take the soup on that one.
So the documentary and the short film have both been nominated for awards,
but technically have three nominations because the short film has been nominated twice, but
it means that the short film and the documentary are going against each other in one category.
Now you know I don't like awards.
I don't like any type of external validation.
But these are industry awards so
it means that it means that the film and TV industry have deemed these pieces of
work worthy of being nominated for awards and there's a very practical
benefit to that. The only reason I make anything, the only reason I write books or make TV is so that I can make more.
I love the process. I adore the process.
Particularly writing. I love writing for television.
I love writing with other people for television.
I love working with really talented, passionate people. I love it. The bit when everything's
finished and I can see it on a screen, that's actually the saddest part. That's
the least enjoyable part. The enjoyable part is the journey and the process.
That's what I live for and I make things so that I can make more things. And
getting industry awards, that's what brings more projects.
It's that simple. Getting industry awards means that
something else would probably get made in the future. That's all I want. What is the next thing?
What's the next project that gives me personal meaning?
Where I get to wake up in the morning and say today I'm gonna do something
that I love and this thing that I love doing is also the reason my bills are paid. So I
want to do that for as long as humanly possible, until I die, ideally, especially with books.
Because my favourite thing, writing books is my favourite thing in the whole world.
I fucking adore writing books and I write books so that another book gets commissioned.
But with this TV shit and the production company,
I'm taking stories from my books that are written
and then adapting them for television with other people.
And I wanna speak again about humility and failure
and the importance of failure.
About one year ago, maybe 14 months ago, I did a podcast about
failure. About if you're working in the creative industry, you must fail. You have to fail.
You have to fail frequently. And what will keep you from creating is the fear of failure.
But failure is inevitable. You must fail all the time. So like a year ago, one of
these projects that just got nominated for an award, did you read about Earth
Skin Fogarty, the short film? I'd spent about two years adapting that from a
short story into a script and a year ago it had been almost commissioned. As in, all that needed to be
done was the ink had to be signed. This was getting made. Loads and loads of
effort. Two years, two years of adapting this thing from a story into a script
and then at the very last minute, at the very last minute, they pulled the plug on
the commission. The TV channel that was commission, they pulled the plug on the commission. The TV channel
that was commissioning it pulled the plug. The worst thing that can happen, to have the
plug pulled on a huge project with two years of work, to have the plug pulled just before
you're about to sign the contract. That fucking happened. That happened. One year ago I did
a podcast about it. When it happened I told you. That's failure.
That is crushing failure. That's what that is right there. First time that ever happened
to me. I was 24. I just made a TV pilot for Channel 4. I spent 18 months writing the script.
We got it filmed. Everything done, the pilot was made. Channel 4 were like, we
love it, we love it, this is gonna get made into a TV series. Yeah, most likely this will
get made into a TV series. And then just before it was gonna get made into a TV series, the
commissioners changed, and the commissioner axed the project. Two years of work down the
drain, didn't know what I was gonna do with my career,
thrust me into a deep fucking depression.
Really, really upsetting. I really tug it personally.
Because I was like 24, 25,
crushed me. Same thing happened last year.
The exact same thing happened last year. I spent
ages writing and developing a script. Surefire
commission, ready to sign the fucking contract and then boom it's all pulled
away. Did I go into a deep depression when that happened last year, when the
exact same thing happened last year? No I did not. I was disappointed. I was
appropriately disappointed and inconvenienced but But did I tell myself,
you're a fucking failure, you're never gonna work in television again, you're toxic, you
have no talent, you're useless, you didn't get a commission because you have no talent,
you have failed, you failed to get a commission and you have failed because you are a failure.
That's the shit I told myself when I was 25. And that type of negative self-talk,
I then start experiencing feelings of depression. And now my entire world view becomes negative.
I become afraid of failing again. I don't want to try again, it's too scary. What did
I say to myself last year? Fuck it. This is what happens in the industry. That's disappointing. But it's
just failure. Happens all the time. I have to fail. I must fail. And because I looked
at it through that realistic, that realistic lens, now I'm not depressed. I'm
appropriately disappointed. And I'm solution-focused and I said to myself,
fuck it. I thought that was gonna get commissioned commissioned and it didn't, bollocks that disappointing. I wonder can I salvage anything from the rubble here?
Where are the positives? Well the positives are, okay I just spent two years writing a
script, it didn't get commissioned, but at least I've got a fucking script that took
two years to write, let's see if anybody else wants it. And my production partner who adapted the script with me just shopped it around and
says, look, we've got a full fucking script, does anyone want it?
And then Screen Ireland came along and said, yeah, fuck it, we'll take that, let's make
this.
So we did, and now one year later, what was a crushing failure is now being nominated
for an award.
That's a success.
And then next year I might
have another failure. And the point I'm trying to make is there's no such thing as failure.
There is no such thing as failure so long as you keep trying. It's especially true for
art. It's especially true for anything creative. But on a long enough time scale, there is
no failure. That isn't also a gigantic lesson.
Like not getting that Channel 4 series in my mid-20s. That crushed me.
Was that a failure? No it fucking wasn't. I had the opportunity to learn how to write scripts for two years.
Doesn't matter that it didn't get commissioned. Even though it failed,
I got to write a script for two years and have it...and run it past
failed, I got to write a script for two years and have it run it past fucking professionals and make it into a pilot and work with a lot of professionals and learn and watch. There's
no such thing as failure. Whatever the fuck you're doing, just stick at it, just stick
at it. And when it, and expect failure, and then when it does fail, you say, great, I
just failed.
Where are the positives?
What can I do next?
How can I get back up?
The only failure is doing nothing because you're scared to try.
That's it.
And I'm not sucking my own flute here talking about getting nominated for an award.
What I'm trying to do is I'm trying to illustrate how this theory is actually true.
I did the podcast a year ago where I told you I've just had a crushing failure,
where something I've worked on for two years has not gotten commissioned.
I'm really disappointed.
And now a year later, the project got commissioned somewhere else and it's up for an award.
I could have done nothing because I was scared to try.
I had a choice. I could have chosen. I could have done nothing because I was scared to try. I had a choice. I could
have chosen, I could have chosen to have said, I've just worked on something for two fucking
years and it didn't get fucking commissioned. They told me it's because they didn't have
the money, but really I know it's because I don't have any talent and they didn't believe
in me. This is hopeless. What's the point? What's
the point in spending two years working on something only to get it rejected at the last minute?
Why does this always happen to me? Why am I so unlucky? I'm the most unluckiest person in the
world and bad things always happen to me because I'm a bad person. and I have spoken to myself that way in the past when I fail.
And one reason is because of a lack of humility.
Placing my self-worth, my self-worth, my identity and my self-esteem into external achievements.
When I was 25 and I got that fucking commission from Channel 4, the pilot, I thought I was
the pilot. I thought I was the shit. I was deeply
insecure and I allowed the external validation of that to soothe and bam, to
temporarily soothe my deep insecurity. The little boy, the little child in me who
wasn't good enough in school, who failed his leave insert, who
the teacher said was stupid.
When I was in my mid-twenties and I got that Channel 4 commission and I got written about
in the paper, I let it all temporarily reassure and soothe that wounded child.
I measured my self-worth against my achievements.
Oh, you've just been given a pilot by Channel
4. Not many people get that opportunity. You must be fucking brilliant. You must be an
amazing person. You must be a good person. You must be a genius. All horseshit. All a
big load of fucking horseshit. And then when it fails...
Now the work hasn't failed, but I've failed as a human being. And it hurts so bad.
When the rejection came, when the failure came,
I would have said things to myself such as,
you're a failure, you have no talent,
you've been found out, you're inherently unlucky,
bad things happened to you.
All the teachers who called you stupid were right.
The principal who expelled you, she
was right, you've just failed now, you've made a fucking idiot out of yourself, you've
disappointed everybody, you're a bad broken person, and anything good you've ever done
before has been an accident.
And that sent me into a spiral of creative block for like a year where I couldn't create
because I was terrified of failing.
I did nothing because I was scared to try for about a year and I can't get that year back.
So why didn't that happen last year? Two years of work. Commission pulled at the last minute.
Failure. Well my attitude towards that failure was much more flexible and realistic.
Actively practicing humility. Nothin of my work doesn't define my work
as a human being in any way.
If I write a good book,
if I write a book that I'm not happy with,
all it is is work.
None of it has to do with me as a human being
and my value as a human being.
I just got nominated for two awards.
I'm conscious and aware that that's an achievement.
I'm conscious and aware that that is an achievement. I'm conscious and aware that
that is an achievement. That's hard to do. There's a lot of competition and also, to
the first ever things I've produced, I don't give a fuck. None of that makes me a good
person. None of that makes me better than anybody else, more important than anybody
else. None of it. Stories that I write, films that I make, whatever.
These are just aspects of my behaviour. They're just aspects of my behaviour. They're pieces
of work and they have nothing to do with me as a human being. It's not really that important.
What's important is the daily mindful effort of treating other people the way that I'd
like to be treated. Cause that is effort. That is effort. Sometimes we get angry, pissed off,
frustrated and we're not as nice to people as we'd like to be. So the daily
active self-compassionate effort of treating other people the way that I'd
like to be treated. I'd like to focus on that. That's what I want to focus on. And
if I get nominated for an award I'm only happy because treated. I'd like to focus on that. That's what I want to focus on. And if I get nominated for an award,
I'm only happy because it probably
means I get to make more work.
But if I identify with that award nomination
and start to say, oh, look at you.
You're class, you are.
I must be better than other people
because society says that this is an achievement.
That's a very intoxicating drug and I have to resist that temptation.
I have to resist the...you see, it's a temptation because like I said, that temporarily soothes
my insecurity.
It temporarily soothes my insecure child.
Whereas something I've started to do recently and it really really works.
Instead of temporarily soothing my insecure child,
I try to be kind and compassionate to future me and I find that really works.
So if I want to be kind and compassionate to future me, then I view an award nomination
realistically. This is a pat on the head for
a job well done, for a piece of work. I'm not getting this award, a piece of work is
getting this award, that's it. And I'm going to have other pieces of work that don't get
commissioned, that people don't like, and that will be viewed as shit and a failure.
Because failure is inevitable, that's what happens. And my pieces of work
have nothing to do with my value as a human being. And if you want to practice compassion
for your future self, I find it incredibly useful. You start off simply. And what I mean by that is,
most people struggle with smartphone use in bed, right? That's very common. We all get stuck on Instagram and TikTok when
we're lying in bed and we should be going to sleep. You make the decision to
go to bed nice and early, you feel great, fucking hell I'm in bed early, wonderful,
can't wait to sleep and then you whip out your phone and now you're on TikTok
and now it's three in the morning.
It's three in the fucking morning and you're awake and you've done nothing but scroll through TikTok.
You wake up the next day exhausted, you're cranky all day, you're not present, you're thinking
negatively and you feel like shit because of what you did the night before. So tonight,
when you're saying to yourself,
I actually really want to go to sleep tonight.
I don't want to scroll through TikTok or Instagram.
I don't want to be looking at my phone screen.
I want to go to bed and be rested.
When that little temptation comes up,
where you're like, fuck it, I'll just do five minutes,
just five minutes of TikTok, it'll be grand.
Think of future you tomorrow.
And say things to yourself like,
Jesus, this is really mean.
Why am I doing this to that person?
They're not a bad person.
And you're thinking about future you
almost as a separate human being.
They're not a bad person, they're a nice person.
Why would I punish that person with sleep deprivation?
That's really mean. Why would I punish that person with sleep deprivation? That's really mean.
Why would I do that to that person?
They don't deserve that.
They deserve a good night's sleep
and to have rest and happiness
and to be able to enjoy their day.
Why am I doing that to this person?
And if you can practice that little thought experiment, that mind exercise, where
you look at potential actions now as being mean, doing something mean and nasty to future
you, you're not going to go near that phone. You're going to put it down and you're going
to go to sleep. And it's a very useful, that's a really useful exercise in in self compassion this episode is turned into a phone call
I'd actually plan on speaking about Christ Christ's 40 days in the desert
this week because it's coming up to lent but anyway look I'm glad to be nominated
for awards I'm glad that the work was considered good enough to be nominated
for awards and it's not just me up for awards it's an glad that the work was considered good enough to be nominated for awards and
it's not just me up for awards, it's an entire team of people who did wonderful work. And
I would like to win these awards just for the practicality of it creating more opportunities
to be creative. For one of the categories you can vote if you like, just go to my Instagram, blind by boat club on Instagram and at the top of
my profile there's saved stories just underneath my profile picture and one of these saved
stories says vote here. So if you click on that you can actually vote and what I will
say about the vote is, so did you read about Arsken Fogarty?
And blind by the land of slaves and scholars,
they're actually competing with each other
for the same award, the People's Choice Award.
So I would ask if you could vote for
did you read about Arsken Fogarty, please?
Because what I really, really wanna do is,
I wanna take my short stories
and turn them into films and television.
I do enjoy making documentaries, but and turn them into films and television. I do
enjoy making documentaries but I'd rather be behind the camera. I don't even like being
on fucking camera to be honest. I like writing and making podcasts so please vote for Did
You Read About Arskin Fogarty and the Royal Television Society People's Choice Awards
if you are voting. Let's have an ocarina pause. This is another fucking phone call podcast because
I've been up the walls with gigs.
Gigs!
And another very exciting project that I can't tell you about just yet
but you're gonna fucking love it when it's done.
But I was up in Belfast all weekend, gigging and working.
Had a wonderful podcast in Belfast.
Let's have a little ocarina pause.
I've got my large stone ocarina, which makes
a baritone sound. Doesn't interrupt any dogs. Sounds like a distant ship.
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Upcoming gigs, Killarney. Killarney don't carry this Friday, I'm in the i-neck. Now
that gig is sold out, but I was holding back about 30 tickets for the guest list Friday I'm in the I neck now that gig is sold out but I was
holding back about 30 tickets for the guest list I'm now gonna put those
tickets out to sale because there was too many people couldn't get tickets to
the gig so if you want to come to Killarney on Friday there's now a few
tickets left next week Thursday the 13th of we March we are in the Cork Opera House, the wonderful wonderful
Cork Opera House at the Cork Podcast Festival. I love the Cork Podcast Festival, check it out.
Then at the end of this month I'm off to Australia and New Zealand, that whole tour is sold out.
I can't fucking wait, I can't wait. I hope I get to go for a run in
the Sydney Botanical Gardens just by the Opera House. I remember I did that the last time
I did a live podcast in Australia was probably 2020. And I remember saying at the time that
my if I had a version of what heaven could be, it'd be going for a run, listening to music in the botanical gardens in Sydney.
Hopefully I can do that this time.
From Melbourne, loads and loads of my listeners have requested that I speak to a fella called Tyson Yunkapurta.
Loads of people have said that me and him would have a good chat.
So if anybody knows him personally, tell them I'm looking for him.
Then I'm back on the 23rd of April.
Limerick fucking concert hall sold out.
Can't believe that.
And then June, my big tour of Scotland and England.
I'm in Bristol, Cornwall, Sheffield, Manchester, Edinburgh, Glasgow, York, London, East Sussex,
also known as Bexhill, and Norwich.
And you can get those tickets on
fain.co.uk forward slash blind buy.
And a lot of those gigs are setting out very very quickly.
And fuck it, I have a gig in Derry.
I have a gig in Derry in September that I keep forgetting
to promote. But if you're around Derry in September, I know it's six months away, come
to my gig in Derry in September, I'm in the Millennium Theatre, wonderful venue. Last
week I did a podcast about Madeira Cake. I spoke about how my mother, when I was a kid,
Madeira Cake was the choice of cake and how it used to
frustrate me because it's such a plain, austere cake.
And my ma would say to me, we're getting Madeira cake because any other type of cake
would be extravagant.
And so many of you had the exact same experience.
It wasn't just a fucking Irish thing.
Americans were calling it pound cake. There was a different
name for it in Australia. But Madeira cake appears to be ubiquitous. And it's the cake
that your mother buys when she's pretending that she's not buying cake. And something
else people started bringing up with me was ginger nut biscuits, or Ginger Snaps as they're known outside of Ireland.
Ginger Snaps are, they're just one up from a digestive. We call them Ginger Nuts.
It's not ginger bread, although it tastes like ginger bread.
But they're round biscuits that are quite hard.
They're just sweet enough and they taste like ginger. And these were, these
were the austere biscuit treats that my mother would buy. Because you're not
getting like a macado, which was an elite sweet biscuit, almost a cake,
marshmallow and jam, profoundly tasty. You're not getting a fucking macado or a
Viscount. They're not even fancy anymore but when I was a kid, Viscounts, Jesus Christ, these
were mint chocolate biscuits, individually wrapped in foil, once a year, that's it.
So the sweet biscuit of choice was the ginger nut, or the ginger snap as you might call
it.
The Madeira cake of the biscuit world. And because so many were
bringing up ginger nuts to me, I wanted to look into the history of fucking
ginger nuts. It's very very interesting indeed. So to go to the roots of the
the ginger nut biscuit, it comes from medieval funeral traditions. So there
used to be a thing called a funeral cake and this was present in a lot of medieval European cultures.
It was kind of half pagan, half Christian.
When a person died, their dead body would be laid out and people would make a bread or a cake, like the dough, not baked yet.
They'd get the dough of some bread or a cake
and they'd put it on the chest of the corpse.
And as the yeast in that bread would rise,
people believed that the bread was rising
with the sins, the sins of the dead person.
So that if you let the bread rise on a corpse's chest when it's lying in wait before burial,
all that person's sins are filling up, filling up this yeast and then they'd bake it.
But also, and this is medieval times, dead bodies were anointed, okay, and the anointing of a dead body was
embalming didn't exist. So some dead bodies were covered with oils with
strong smelling spices to hide the smell of decomposition. And these funeral
cakes that were rising on the chest of a corpse, that the yeast was rising.
Sometimes these cakes, they started to be
flavored with spices that were associated with anointing.
So cloves were used, caraway seeds and ginger.
Lots and lots of ginger.
Ginger was very popular in medieval Europe. So now you've
got this ginger flavored cake, this funeral cake, rising on a corpse's chest,
rising and absorbing the sins of that dead person into the fucking cake.
And it's flavored like ginger, then it's thrown into the oven and it's baked and
this is the funeral cake and it was presented at like ginger, then it's thrown into the oven and it's baked and this is the funeral cake
and it was presented at the wake for the dead person. But in England,
England, very much Wales and parts of Ireland, some communities had an individual known as a sin-eater,
often an incredibly poor person in the village and their job was to be a sin eater.
And what this meant was, this person would call around to the wake where the dead person lay
and the cake that had risen on that dead person's chest had absorbed all the sins.
had absorbed all the sins.
So the poor sin eater
who didn't have any money would eat the cake full of that person's sins.
So the sin eater was eating the sins of that person, this ginger flavored cake.
They're eating that person's sins and then absorbing the sins into themselves. So the person who's dead now
gets to enter heaven with no sins because the poorest person in the
village is after eating all their fucking sins. And then once the sin eater
was finished and it's like that's it now I've eaten all the cake, yum yum, yeah I
can feel all their sins inside me, definitely I have their sins, then everyone at the wake would like be overcome
with this contemptuous hatred.
They would contemptuously look down, they'd look down on this poor person, this poor person
who was willing to eat cake and absorb someone's sins, and then they'd kick the living shit out of the
fucking poor sin eater. The sin eater would be forcibly removed from the wake, full of
the dead person's sins, and then the bereaved party, the friends and family of the dead
person, would spit at and shout and beat the sin eater and banish them. So that tradition of these ginger cakes
that rise on the chest of a dead person
and absorb all their sins.
Over the centuries, by the time you get
to the Victorian period, you now have funeral biscuits,
which are what we would now call ginger nuts, ginger snaps.
So there were these biscuits with a strong, sweet ginger taste
that were hard to bite.
And people at funerals made them into like little skulls,
or they might have Bible verses on them,
or even an image of the person who died.
And these Victorian funeral biscuits they'd
either get eaten by the mourners or they'd keep them as souvenirs from the
funeral to remember the dead person and those biscuits eventually became
gingernuts, ginger snaps, the hard ginger biscuit that you buy that's a little bit
sweet that you're gonna have with your tea, you can follow
a thread to the early middle ages where there were cakes full of sins leavened on the chest
of a corpse and flavored with the spices that you'd use to stop a corpse smelling.
So I got a new found respect for fucking, for ginger nuts or ginger snaps after that.
Now if you're listening to this podcast on the day it goes out,
today is the...
Wednesday the 5th of March, it's Ash Wednesday.
So today is Ash Wednesday.
Now you know,
I'm not into religion,
I'm not a religious person.
Christianity was something that was done to me in school,
against my will.
But also,
you know I love mythology, and at the end of the day,
the Bible is a gigantic book of mythology written by human beings from the Iron Age.
So I'm fascinated in that respect in the same way that I'd be fascinated by Greek mythology
or Irish mythology. So today is Ash Wednesday which means that Lent begins today. And when I was
speaking there about that medieval practice of the sin eater, which was a bit of an outlawed
practice in Christianity. It was half-peg and half-Christian. It wasn't sanctioned by the
church. It was a bit too weird. Like there's a poor fella in the village and he comes and eats a fucking cake on your dead man's chest to eat our sins. And
then presumably when the sin eater, the sin eater who has his belly full
every week when people die, that sin eater then when he dies he goes to hell
he's got everybody's sins. But that sin eater most likely comes from an Old Testament
practice known as the scapegoat.
So like 2 and 1 half thousand years ago
in the desert in the Middle East, what the people would do
is they'd get two goats, two goats that are related,
like brother and sister or whatever, maybe twin goats.
And they would kill one goat, they'd sacrifice this goat, but then the goat that lived
absorbed all the sins of the entire community and then they would get this goat that's alive and
they'd just send it off into the desert to wander.
And that was the scapegoat.
This goat that wanders in the wilderness is hell effectively.
This goat that has all the sins of the community wanders the hell desert.
And in the desert in the Old Testament, in the wilderness, there's this demon.
He's a fallen angel.
He's a bit like Satan. but his name is Azazel.
And Azazel, he was a fallen angel that gave humans forbidden knowledge.
So like Azazel was the one that showed humans how to, how to sin basically, how to make
weapons, how to commit adultery, how to steal, whatever the fuck.
Azazel was the one that showed humans how to do this. And in some stories, the scapegoat that
sent out into the desert becomes Azazel, becomes this goat-like devil. But anyway, the scapegoat,
the scapegoat definitely inspired the sin eater, but most likely too. The Old Testament story of the scapegoat probably inspired the story of Christ.
So today is Ash Wednesday, and Ash Wednesday is the beginning of Lent.
And Lent is when it's its...it's the temptation of Christ.
So Christ, like the scapegoat, fucks off into the desert. Christ had just
been baptized by John the Baptist, right? And now that he'd been baptized, now he's
going to be tempted. The Holy Spirit doesn't take him towards safety, but takes him out
into the unsafe barren wilderness, the desert. Christ is wandering, he's not eating, he's denying his physical body all sources
of stimulation and pleasure.
Food, drink, comfort, in order to achieve humility, to be free from desire, to be free
from attachment, to abstain from wants, needs, ego, to strip himself down
to nothing.
So now Christ is walking the desert 40 days and 40 nights, right?
And he's freezing cold at the night time, he's roasting hard at the daytime, he's hungry,
he's at his absolute weakest, he hasn't slept, he's fucked. And then when he's at
his weakest in the desert, out pops your man, Azazel, the goat devil fella. And he
says, oh it's Christ, is it? The fella who can perform miracles, water into wine,
loaves and fishes, alright, okay. I've seen you walk in the desert here. No food, no sleep, nothing.
Starving. And then Azazel, the devil, he picked up a stone and said, if you're really, if
you're really the son of God, if you're as important as you say you are, turn these stones
into bread. And Christ said, yeah I am fucking starving. I'd love some bread right now.
And I could turn those stones into bread. I could
do it in two seconds. Oh it'd be so tasty and I could eat all that lovely bread. But
then he goes, no, no, I'm going for something greater. I'm going to abstain from the bread.
No I'm not doing it. And Christ kept on walking, meditating, not eating, going about the desert.
And now as Azel, the goat devil fellow, was getting real pissed off.
And he did some devil magic and now all of a sudden they weren't in the desert anymore.
They were at the top of a very tall tower above a city.
And Azazel says to Christ,
if you're the son of God, then you can jump off this tower
down to the ground and angels
will come out of nowhere and they'll save you. And what's being tempted there
now is that's arrogance. That's human arrogance is what's being tempted.
Thinking that you're brilliant, thinking that you're invincible, thinking that
you're better than other people. The arrogance of I'm the son of God, I can jump off this tall building
and I can do whatever I want and the angels will save me.
That's hubris, arrogance, cockiness.
Thinking that you're better than other people
rather than equal to other people.
That's what's being tempted there.
So Christ says to Azizel the Goat Devil,
go fuck yourself, you prick.
No, I'm not jumping.
I wanna wander the desert for 40 days and 40 nights
and not ease and abstain and achieve humility.
All right, that's what I'm doing.
Now they're back in the desert.
Azazel is really pissed off with Christ now.
Nothing's working.
The devil goes off, Azazel has a bit of a tink
and he comes back and now he approaches
with the greatest temptation of all.
Christ is wandering the desert, very hungry and then Azazel
waves his hands or whatever and then before Christ the desert changes and what's in front of him is
this beautiful city, gorgeous buildings, all the riches you can imagine, all the food you can
imagine, the most beautiful women he's ever seen, fucking everything that he could possibly
want right there in this city, and as Azel says to him, you can have that, I'll give
you all of that right now, every bit of it, all you gotta do is worship me. You can have all of that.
Every pleasure you could ever want is yours. Just worship me. And Christ says, no fuck
off, I'm not interested. I'm here to wander the desert. I'm here to achieve spiritual
atonement and humility. And then the angels came down, told the devil to fuck off, as
is El, and the angels gave Christ food and and met his
needs and he was happy and then of course at the end of that that's when he
was crucified that's he's the scapegoat he's the goat that's that took
humanity's sins and was sacrificed that's why they call him the lamb of
God the sacrificial lamb of God.
The story is just based on that much earlier scapegoat story.
And again I reiterate, I'm not into religion, but I view that story there as brilliant mythology,
brilliant mythology that was written down by human beings, that contains fuck-tons of
wisdom that aligns with with psychology. The devil there, that's
that's our weakness, that's our desire, that's our insecurity, that's our pain.
The first temptation. Just because you can turn stones into bread doesn't mean
you should. Turning stones into bread there is it's giving into short term
gratification. I mentioned earlier both you're going to bait and then you have
this short term gratification of fuck it I'll just look at TikTok for five
minutes. Ah fuck it yeah go on. I don't tolerate the frustration I give into
that immediate gratification I I look at TikTok.
Now I'm up to three in the morning.
I feel like shit the next day.
I'm tired and I'm self-flagellating.
I turned stones into bread because I could.
I chose the path of least resistance, the easy way out.
Choosing to not do that, that's emotional resilience.
Choosing to not look at TikTok, choosing to not argue with a
stranger online, choosing to not give in to a feeling of anger and say something mean to another
person. Christ's first temptation there is about emotional maturity. Having the emotional maturity
to notice the feeling of frustration, to tolerate that feeling of frustration,
because you want to be nice to your future self.
The second temptation.
Azrael or whatever his name is takes him to the top of the building and says,
if you're the son of God, jump, angels are going to catch you.
Again, it's all emotional maturity.
It's humility, arrogance, insecurity.
Nobody who's secure in themselves, who has strong self-esteem, thinks that they're better
than other people.
Someone who has a narcissistic view of themselves, someone who consistently compares themselves
to other people, whether that's by saying, I'm better than them, or I'm not as good as that person,
continually comparing, or being jealous,
temporarily soothing the feeling of insecurity,
by telling themselves that,
I'm fucking brilliant, I'm better than everybody else,
I can do what I like,
being at the top of the tower and saying,
I can fucking jump off if
I want. I'm special. I'm brilliant. I'm special. The angels will save me. Instead, you go,
no I'm a human being the exact same as everybody else. Doesn't matter who the fuck I am. Even
though I'm high up, even though I'm at the top of the tower, up here at the top of the
tower looking down at everybody else. I mean that's a metaphor for status right there. Even though I'm at
the top, if I jump, I'm just a bag of flesh and bones, I'm a human being, the exact same
as everybody else. We're all equal when it comes to death. That's what the second temptation
is. That's about humility. I'm better than nobody else. Nobody else is better than me.
Because all humans are equal, we all have intrinsic value.
It's the exact same.
And we're all just bags of flesh and bones.
Life is uncertain.
Anything can happen.
The only certainty we have is death.
Everyone's gonna die.
And then the third temptation.
The devil says, there you go Christ.
There's a kingdom for you.
With food, drink, women, everything. Everything you you want it's there you just got to worship me are
you willing to have nice things if it means being cruel and mean to
other people would you like a life with meaning in it with meaning where your
happiness comes from simply just existing and being alive and that's
enough or do you want to that's enough? Or do you
want to become a slave to possessions? Do you want to become a slave to greed, jealousy,
gossip, backstabbing, taking from other people to increase what you have? Having a life full
of things but devoid of meaning and humble happiness. Do you want the end result, the emptiness of the end result,
or would you like to work on the emotional maturity to pursue the present moment and
enjoy what's happening right now, the process, and that one there is the last temptation.
And then the angels come along and they're sound to him and what that means to me is like I don't believe in fucking heaven and hell
Heaven exists heaven is the present moment
if we can be free from
Internal chatter
Negative thoughts about the past negative thoughts about the future and instead
Just simply observe and notice
and be right now in the present moment, that's heaven. The happiest moments of
your life you've been in the present. You've been in the present moment in the
here and now enjoying whatever that was. Hell is when we're not in the present
moment, we're not here. We're off in the wilderness of our thoughts,
worrying about what might happen or ruminating about what already has happened. So that's that there, that's the whole point of Lent and Ash Wednesday and all that shit.
Ramadan is similar. It's an opportunity to abstain, to test yourself and achieve humidity.
And I don't want to be accused of Christianity there. That's a brilliant story that was written by
human beings who understood the human condition. And that's what that is. And
you can go at that without needing any belief whatsoever.
Alright, dog bless. I'll catch you next week. In the meantime, genuflecto a swan,
rub a cat, marvel at some earthworms. If you're at a point in life when you're ready to lead with purpose, we can get you
there.
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