The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Hot Body/Evil Tattoo

Episode Date: January 14, 2025

Jay talks about the alternate endings for the movie "American History X." He reminds the gang about the scene where the skinheads play the black inmates for control of the basketball court. Jay poses this question to everyone: If a magic genie granted you Edward Norton's buff-body but you had to keep his American History X Nazi tattoo, would you take it? Jacob wants to take the deal if it would make him taller. Hear everyone's shocking answers! *To hear the full show to go www.siriusxm.com/bonfire to learn more FOLLOW THE CREW ON SOCIAL MEDIA: @thebonfiresxm @louisjohnson @christinemevans @bigjayoakerson @robertkellylive @louwitzkee @jjbwolfSubscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ on Apple Podcasts to listen to new episodes ad-free and a whole week early.

And now the bonfire with Big Jay Okerson and Robert Kelly And we ain't going nowhere Cuz we're queer cuz we're moving right next door to you body count motherfucker mmmm y'all can suck my motherfucking dick oh ice tea Oh, Ice T. What a wacky dude. Did he ever go back to rap or did he just go right into acting after this? Did he ever go back into rap or did he just stay in metal?

No, sure. No, no, he did rap for sure. I mean, he's the rapper in the movie Breaking. I mean, he's like the most basic corny like you know, the ice is cold, the tea is hot. Come on baby baby show me what you got. But that's actually a line from it. My favorite type of rap. Is it really? Yeah. You like that? cheeseball? Ice is cold and the tea is hot.

My name is Bob. Was it Dougie Fresh? Dougie Fresh? Yeah. That was that type of rap. Do you like that the best? No, of course not. I don't like that the best.

I said I have a hard time. Like the evolution of that, it went so fast from that, in my eyes, at least as a kid, it was like that. And then like Public Enemy was the first thing that kind of got out of that Run DMC kind of vibe. Where it was like different.

And then by the time it got to like, for me like Onyx and Wu Tang and stuff like that and then the Far Side and bands like that, it was so levels above what Run DMC, there's no obvious none of it without Run DMC, but I mean Run DMC never ever got past like the, you know, beep-a-bop-a-dee-ba-boo.

Do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Skibba-dabba-do-ba-da-ba-do-ba-da. Uh-huh, with the hoot-ba-ha. Ba-da boo. Skibba dabba do ba da ba do ba da. Uh huh, with the hood pie. Ba da ba da ba ba do ba deedus. But I love Run-Gem-C. Yeah, I like, I mean I like that. Dougie Fresh, I like Dougie Fresh, that was fun.

So silly. Mother man's mother need a shoe horn. Sex man, Dougie Fresh, ya own. Uh uh uh. You remember when Roger tries to rap in Lethal Weapon? The name is Roger and he the heat a hood a hodger. I always remember that being the worst rap. Well, my name is something I'm here to say

is the quintessential, this is about to suck shit. Did you see that deleted scene from that, from... Lethal Weapon? Lethal Weapon, they deleted it. It was a school shooting. Guy was in the... Nice. Yeah, it was a guy killing kids.

Just killing fucking kids. Deserved though? And he just walked, of course. Okay. Not all of them. Is that for real? Yeah, he walks up, they're like, we're swat. They're like five minutes out.

He just, all right, check it out. He just walks up. Nice. And just shoots. He goes, how is this guy? Riggs or Murtaugh shoots him. Who? Riggs. Riggs walks up. Murtaugh's not there. Riggs just walks up and he goes, how is this guy? Riggs or Murtaugh shoots him. Who? Riggs.

Riggs walks up. Murtaugh's not there. Riggs just walks up, he goes, how's his shot? Is he taking people out? He's like, he's kinda, you know, he's shooting, he's not hitting everything. And he goes, all right, and he just walks up. Guy's shooting him, missing, just takes him out,

shoots him right in the fucking head. Oh, that's awesome. I gotta see that. You know, I read a thing yesterday. There's an alternate ending to American History X where something after, you know how it ends, American History X, like he turned his ways around and then the kid goes to school.

They've also said in the script, it's supposed to be the kid who shot Danny, Edward Furlong in the chest, is the younger brother of the kid that Edward Norton stomped on his face. I don't think it was ever made clear in the chest is the younger brother of the kid that Edward Norton stomped on his face. I don't think it was ever made clear in the movie, but the thing I read said that was supposed to be the case of it.

But then, could you imagine if they went with this? See if you can find like a write-up of it, of what the alternate ending was. They never showed the video, I don't think, but it's Edward Norton, you see him like, after Danny's like, Danny's like crying, he gets up, I think that's it, and then you see him, you see a sink, and the hair hits the sink, and then it pans up,

and you see his swastika tattoos out again, and he smirks at the camera. I was like, what? Does Back in Black start playing after that? Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk, dang, tsk, dang it. Time to go take out some blacks again. He kicks the door open on the front lawn, there's a cross, he throws a cigarette and it lights up. Well, the director was like, well, this is how the thing, we can't ever get outside

of this cycle of violence, but I'm like, yeah, but he's screaming while he's holding his brother, he's saying, what did I do? He's saying, what did I do? So it wouldn't have made sense. But like, it is so funny to see him go like, you know what what you're right I'm back

Let's get some black people Get those mixins across the wall Indians from India. Put him in the catapult. Yeah, the ending he wanted to do. The original thing ends where he gets shot by a black student whose brother was killed by Derek earlier in the film. In the other version, after we are taken to a scene in the family

apartment where the detectives are trying to comfort his mother and sister, the camera pans away and cuts to a scene in the bathroom, the sink filled with hair and an electric razor next to it. Derek is standing there with his head shaved. Stairs in the mirror, looks at the swastika on his chest before pulling out a pistol. The film ends with a shot of Derek's sick smile, the same style we saw when he was arrested for his murders earlier in the film. Sss, sss, sss, dang.

I'm glad that's not the ending. Him smirking at the camera would have been such a hilarious. I'm like, that would have been the most confusing thing. As confusing as the triumphant music for finally taking the basketball courts back from black people. Besides confusing scene I saw with Kurt Metzger the first time and when Kurt pointed it out cuz like if you go to the basketball scene because I play the music there they start thinking the black guys are playing rough like hits him in the face or whatever and they're like yes but he

goes you know what how about this he goes whites first blacks rest of the game score stays the same like we're down or whatever and I mean everything Possibly that can go wrong In this bet that's what I made with when I did the Shane and Matt McCusker thing. I made an American history expert But they go alright, so now we're gonna blacks first whites but winners take the court like whoever wins Losers are fucking gone. No fighting, no complaining, he says. No bitching, he goes, we leave or you leave for good. And they go, okay, and then this ends. And you'll see with Edward Norton stealing the ball,

all five foot six of them, and going up for a game-winning reverse dunk And they play triumphant, you know, it's like yeah, I get out of here you black pieces of shit They're throwing stuff at me. Yeah, we did it. We finally got rid of it's the music so confusing to what wait I thought this is bad. You're not supposed to that's Stacy Keach. Yeah with the hair lip. Yeah Without the mustache God, why do they do that? No back up back up. You gotta go to the dunk Give it a little forward and some volume, please We're doing mostly an audio medium so this is uh Hmm hmm hmm peculiar

New year, you'll catch it. Oh, yeahculiar. New year. New year. Same problem. You'll catch it. Oh yeah, there's your boy, dude. Is that Ethan? Ethan Suppley. Ethan, oh look, he's big. Look how big he is.

Yeah, well that's back when he was a small forward. Small forward? Large forward. You gotta, wait, wait, turn it around, back it up. You gotta show Bobby this. Bobby doesn't remember the most amazing play in basketball history since the black man's involvement in basketball this is the most amazing thing a white man's ever done yeah look listen to music

even I have goosebumps right now and I'm not happy for them but I'm fooled into them like oh bye bye blacks the palm trees are laughing Against all odds we beat you at a game that you're way better at with a morbidly obese guy in full clothing And you guys left you left quietly and also no trouble. I guess the words I guess those skinheads beat us fair and square. Oh Yeah, now they accept that all of a sudden you just push them in the chest this is stupid I know the point forward is wearing full suspenders this is like an Adam Sandler movie and Kurt I remember watching Kurt goes are they trying to trick me in the cheering that the fucking voice of premise won the game? Ha ha ha!

Ta-da! And we're like, yeah! Oh my god, we did it! We beat the blacks in basketball! You have a rocky moment in the theater by accident? Woo-hoo! But only that ending would have gone with that scene. It's the only two things where they would have

gone together perfectly. I just watched a little documentary on this movie. The director totally totally he hates it He hates Edward Norton why Edward Norton took over the editing? Yeah, because Doug Davidoff was friends with that director He used to come to the cellar. Okay. He's crazy. He's a crazy-looking dude to talk to him a little bit But I heard something about that. Why did he make much stuff after work like they were? He was mad at everyone. he hated Edward Norton. He hated him.

Cause exactly, he just took over. And kind of like, at the original cut, Edward Norton was drastically less seen. Yeah, much less. And Edward Norton saw it and threatened to, I don't know, disassociate himself from the movie. Yeah, much less, like, much less. It was supposed to focus far more on Edward Furlong.

Is this a bio of this director's life? If you see the guy's... He's nuts. He's still upset. Jacob. But he admits that I'm not a Hollywood director. I wouldn't... Like, he would have bankrupted them. Jacob, Jacob is a

great question and he goes well take us around the whole room except for you Christine go back to that picture of Edward Norton with a shirt off I know what you're do you take this body but you have to live with that swastika tattoo forever I just would I would explain it I'd be like yeah dude the genie was hilarious and he said I can get the body but I gotta keep this one I swear to you I'm Jewish I don't believe in this at all okay it's not the first time I've thought about this I mean four years when I saw this like if you had to by the way none of the arm stuff none of the hands stuff just that one at some point you have to

reveal the giant swastika and the tank top's not gonna cover it completely. So do you have to reveal it or can you just wear shirts all the time? You can wear shirts your entire life and then what's the point of having the body? Yeah. That's true, it's a catch-22.

But every time you're like, every time you go to the beach, like you got it when you're in your perimeter, and everyone goes, guys, I'm about to peel down, listen to me. Part of getting this body, the deal was I had to have a swastika tattoo and have it exposed for the rest of my life. I mean, no offense to anything.

I hate what this stands for. But look at my body. Voss, thank you for inviting me to your barbecue, I love you. Voss, before you freak out, I'm about to take my shirt off here. Now not only is your wife about to get dripped by my body You're gonna be a little upset by my chest tattoo

I think a woman would overlook a gigantic swastika if you have that pot or you just find the hottest racist chick That's an option. Yeah How can I say there's never be supposed to laugh and they just kind of go like okay It's a good idea Just move down to South Carolina get a show on Anthony's network. You gotta roll your eyes cuz she's always being racist She's not gonna accept you but you have to roll her eyes cuz she's too ready and you're not you just have the tattoo She's like another fucking black just move the neighbor. You're like calm down, honey. I don't care that much Well, your fucking tattoo says you do. I mean it not I look at nothing nothing. It's a

the logo itself your fucking tattoo says you do. I mean, look, not for nothing, it's a, the logo itself. Go on. It's a, I'm gonna finish what you were gonna say. It's a great, Trump's on my back, you can say it if you want. I'm just saying.

No, Trump's on my back, you're fine. What it represents is terrible, but it's like the, I'm a Red Sox fan, I love the Red Sox, but the Yankee symbol is the shit. Sure. You know what I mean? I hear you. You see that symbol, you fucking. I know.

You can't. I mean, even if you're black, you're kind of like, it's a cool tattoo. I'd rather have a swastika than like the Toronto Raptors, like Raptor drilling a basketball logo. I'd rather explain a swastika than have the Raptors logo on me. Well, when I go in there. And they go, what is that swastika for?

I go, I'm a Raptors fan, but I'm not wearing that gay ass Raptor dribbling a basketball on my chest. So I went with swastika. The two ways to show that you like it. I know there's other directions. When I go into the Hindu market, they're all over the... They have the swastikas, but they're reversed. I know.

They're trying to tell you you're not welcome and you're not listening. You keep coming, you walk around and he goes... They had it before the swastikaas but they're reversed. I know they're trying to tell you're not welcome and you're not listening. He keep coming, you walk around and he goes. They had it before the swastika. Why don't they understand? Not welcome. Yeah, they had Buddhism. I think the Egyptians had it.

Why do these Jews keep coming in? Don't they see our swastikas? I think it's where it's located too, like the position of it, no? I always think it's so weird, there's a building when you drive by on the highway in Philly down 76 West. One of the buildings,

I don't know if it's the right or wrong. I think it's the right way. One of the buildings is in the brickwork at the very top of it. It's just got like a brick swastika. Like, it's weird. Really? Very strange.

Like, on 76 when you're going like, towards where my grandmother lived in Philly. It's right by the, it's kind of by the art museum. I think there's probably a lot of buildings with swastikas in them. In America? Before the second world war,

it was probably what it was, Hindu and all that. No, that's the other direction. You know what I mean? Yeah. Is it the other direction? This just says that the swastika was basically stolen by the West. By the way, it means good fortune or wellbeing.

I don't mind that at all. But not to Jews. But not particularly to Jews. But believe me, all these little fun facts you see here, it may have first been used in Eurasia as early as 7,000 years ago, and also Native American tribes used. These are all the things I'll be saying,

hysterically, while I'm... Taking your shirt off in the rubble race. While I'm taking my shirt off, yeah, yeah, yeah. While some girl's pulling my fucking sick dick out of my pants, I'm explaining to her why my swastika, no, you actually know, 7,000 years ago they believed there was swastika, so that's way before the Jew thing.

Can you get another tattoo around it, or is it just that? So you can't get like a smiley face? We all take it, or is it just that? So you can't get, like, a smiley face? We all take it if you're like, I could turn this into a fucking box. You could turn it into a big square or diamond on your chest. That doesn't matter. How do you know?

No, you get to keep the... Look at it. You just close off the sides. I mean, you know what you did in high school. No, I sit next to Luis J. Gomez, who draws swastikas and then boxes them up... Before you leave. ...before you leave. It's like putting out your cigarettes

before you leave somewhere. But, Jay, you're saying if you got the swastika tattoo and you tried to cover it up, it would magically just come back as a swastika. Well, how about this? Let's put your life on it, yeah, for your life. You will keep this body, but that swastika has got to be that prominent always. I can't put, like, Chinese writing

or Japanese writing nowhere. You can't fuck with it at all. Can I get other tattoos? Like can I get a letter on my arm explaining what it is? Can I get like tattoos on my abs going, if you like these abs, I- You could get, here's what I'll accept. Here's what I'll accept.

Very, very small, right below it. You could put dot dot dot J slash K that's it but it's gonna be you got to be up on your tit to see it right but you get that body and by the way that's not even the best look you gotta see when he puts the arms over the head that's when he really gives it to you that's when he really shows you what he's working with or how about when he's angry fucking the white trash girl the white supremacy girl yeah Fyrouza Balk. Remember their aggressive fucking in combat boots?

I've only seen the movie twice. Right before he kills the guy. I've seen it twice. And what happens, you come when he kills the black guy and you never saw the rest? No, why would you say that? Oh, because you seem to not know about the rest of the movie after he kills the black guy.

I don't, I didn't, it didn't. You also stop Rocky IV after Apollo Creed dies. I did not, that is. You know Rocky wins in Russia. You should watch it one day. I did watch the black guy. I don't, I didn't, it didn't. You also stop Rocky IV after Apollo Creed dies. I did not. You don't even know that he wins. You know Rocky wins in Russia. You should watch him one day. I did watch the whole thing, that's not true. Damn dude, this is the same smile

he said he was gonna do at the end of the movie. Jesus, he's creepy looking. What a fantastic racist body. There it is. Yeah, come on dude, that's how I would show my swastika. Hey you guys don't mind my swastika do you? Yeah Swastika boy swastika boy. Oh, they'll call me swastika boy. It'll be great. It'll be my rap name Lou when you take your shirt off in the beach, you're gonna attract other handjob races I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink.

I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink.

I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I'm gonna go get a drink. I got butt fucked by my own people in prison. They butt fucked me into, and then the hilarious comedy of Guy Torey was able to snap me back. Maybe you could just tell them it's a Chinese star. No, no, no, no, no. No, you can't make excuses. Listen, you can't make excuses. You have to tell them what it is.

You have to tell them what it is. You can't. It's a swastika. It's a swastika. It's a symbol from a German totalitarian government that was trying to eliminate the Jews. But I don't feel that way. I just wanted this body.

On your defined peck. Yeah. Do I have to get the Pam Anderson, Bob Weir tattoos? No, you don't have to get any of the other tattoos. You don't have to be littered with them. You just have to have that gigantic, full side of your chest swastika. And by the way

Say what you will It's a fantastic tattoo in that it's not I have a lot of things that are filled in thick black that you they start getting Choppy that thing is shiny It was good. It's good It's good color work. I don't know how to say it. I've said this before, white supremacists somehow have the best tattoos. They're all... They're all swastikas, but... Jacob loves eagles and iron crosses so much.

He really does. If you watch the prison show, I'm trying to remember the name of it, the white supremacist who's in maximum security, they can't even let him out for an hour because he'll kill somebody. They do get bad ass tattoos.

I don't know where he gets his tattoos from. They get them from the little gay guy who does the tattoos who they fuck. Yeah, the twink. Yeah, the little twink does them. Jacob, did you ever answer this question in your head? Because by the way, I'll start devoting and I'm gonna say 100% yes,

I take that body for that swastika. Jacob. This is tough. It's a lifetime of explanation, but I'm a wordsmith, dude. I know how to yap. I'll talk my way out of this. Question. Yes? I have to keep my height.

Ooh. Oh God, then don't take the tattoo. No, that's the end. Yeah, absolutely. That's it. I'm saying no. But that body. No, not with that height.

That looks weird. It looks like a strong midget. It doesn't mean no good good do I get to be? I'll take five ten five ten Six feet you get you get his body. Okay. Yeah, you get his body you get six feet. I'm six feet six feet that body But I mean you have to do a lot of topples things at your parents house. Yeah You're in Florida this is gonna make Florida a real different experience for you my man You have to do a lot of topples things at your parents' house. Yeah. You're in Florida.

This is going to make Florida a real different experience for you, my man. You only get one shirt, too. You can't wear like two shirts. Yeah, so if you choose a lighter color, people might see. If it starts to rain, they're going to see your swastika. Right. You'll be exposed.

My thing would say, I say, I say treat it like Megan's law. You go up to everybody and inform them, I have a swastika tattoo. It was a deal I made with some kind of weird fucking relic I found that I would take this body if I kept a swastika. I got it, I don't regret any decisions I've made. I just want you to know, I don't feel any kind of way about this, it's just the nature of what it has to be.

You'd have to lose some weight. How tall are you? Six three. I'll take three inches knockoff to have an unreal body. So you take three inches off your height, six feet, that body, swastika. Yeah. Okay.

I'm saying even if I'm a chubby six feet, I'm saying yes, as long as I can be six feet. So the body is. Really? To have height? You'd take Ethan Suppley's body? Chubby six feet. I'm saying yes as long as I can be so the body really So you take a height you take Ethan Suppley's body with the No, no, that's too much but I mean I want no no no that definitely yes Okay, you look like that. Yes, but you get how about you keep your you keep your height now No, you keep your height now? No.

You keep your height with that level of body? No, five, six, and I get to have that body? No, I have to be six feet. Black Lou? Because it's worthless. Now keep in mind you're black, so that swastika tattoo's gonna show up like thug life on the stomach.

It's not gonna be that prominent. People gotta get up on ya. That's what I was gonna ask. Can it be the same tattoo, the same color as my skin? No, it's gotta be the color of tattoo. But on your black skin, it's not gonna show through a ton. You probably have the easiest path on this. Done, absolutely. And also you get to say things like,

you could do things like this too. Radio bit. You know what I mean, you're black, so no one's gonna hold you over the fire for what this, they're gonna be more like, were you branded in jail or something? You're no no no my family's a part of an African tribe are you staying your height or you're so I'm six foot no no this is all staying heights you know no no way you're doing that well you have

to stay your height you stay right you can't get the six feet the body I never thought about the height with the body is part of the height Jay the you don't know bodies the height our lives It's worthless to look like that at five at five six big deal Jacob all hand you cereal boxes off the fridge just fucking Sandwich your dream into this You gotta give him the height you gotta give him the whole body DJ Lou, what do you think? Do you think they give him the height or not? You give him the body, the whole body. No, that's two separate things.

That's two separate wishes. Thank you, thank you. Then we're out. On behalf of me and Lou, we're out. Black Lou question? Quick question. Jacob, not now. Black Lou's got a question. I don't know if it's ever been said,

but how well hung is this guy? Because that really... Edward Norton? Yeah. Has Edward Norton ever showed his fucking hog? No. Check out Edward Norton's, I think he Norton ever showed his fucking hog? No Check it out Edward Norton. I think he has I feel like he has. I bet somebody slept with him and talked Maybe. Such a girl thing to say. I bet somebody talked about his cogs. I bet the guy's got a decent swinger on him. I've been on his Facebook hog fucking member group

I feel like when he got I feel you see his flapper when he gets up from fucking the chick in the movie Yeah, but it's not what's up. No. No, I'm sorry. I didn't want to interrupt I was curious you have to stay your height. You're one of us. I get that body forever But do I have to do do I have to do all the prison workouts that he does to keep it? You're gifted this body for payment. Yes is not exercise or diet or any of that Yeah, the payment is simply you have to live your life. You're the that body is forever marred by this Tattoo and you have to show it sure of course You want to show that body off for now? You got a swastika on New York, New Hampshire

They'd fucking carry me on their shoulders. God damn right to you be the governor Beholdenous squam-like king. Christine, any word on his dick or what? No, I'm looking. That was a weird tone. I bet she's looking looking. Christine, would you date a swastika guy if he looked like that?

Mm-hmm. Dane? She fucked swastika guys. What are you talking about? Well, for, didn't that? I forgot my Christine history for a second. That symbol in our black dick, the Nazi dick, I can for a second. That's way more black dick than Nazi dick, I can tell you that.

That symbol means a lot to her. Did he show an ounce of interest in me? Wow. Holy shit. He's like, well, you're white. Well, you are white, I guess. That guy did compliment my skin. Your whiteness?'s a fucking ounce of interest

What about DJ Lou fuck no, I've never Sleep with a Jewish or black or Spanish woman ever again. Yes, you would it's exhausting. I'm not gonna explain that shit every time It's a very easy explanation for you. You're I was granted. I was granted a wish. Just called you a wordsmith? Yeah, I called myself that earlier. You called yourself that. I was just gonna become a Nazi. I'll just lean into it. Yeah, you will hook up with those things, Lou.

Won't you explain the situation? Those things? What, do you have one now? You know, those things, blacks, Jews, those things. Those things are sexy to me. You know, for sure, but you're gonna still get them. It's nothing to do with it. You just gotta explain your swastika.

You know how do we- They're so happy to be with that body. If you take your shirt off and then all of a sudden they see that, they're gonna be like what the fuck? And then you're like let me explain. They're gonna find that so interesting. I don't know. It's like having that body with herpes.

No way. Hmm. Interesting. Wait, what about herpes? Herpes. It's like having that body with herpes. No way. Hmm. Interesting. Herpes? It's a, it's a, it's a, you can't fuck a girl and give her fucking swastika. So it doesn't, it doesn't come off on her. She sees it. You can have a rough time explaining it. Yeah. But just here's the thing too. What if you do that? And all of a sudden,

she's like, well, I see mine. And I'm like, oh shit. Nice. Damn. You join in a club. A girl who would be into that must fuck like crazy, though. Yeah. Trying to lose going to sit up with a swastika. The Grim Reaper is paying you a visit today. That's Wayne Grow from Heat, my favorite movie. Is that your favorite movie? Yeah. It's a good movie.

So weird, too, because I'm not a heist guy. It's not my type of thing, but the acting is. My favorite movie. Is that your favorite movie? Yeah. That's a good movie. So weird too because I'm not a heist guy. It's not my type of thing, but the acting in that movie is so good. I'm a heist guy. So dark, I know, I know. I'm surprised Heat's not higher up your list. It's because it was, I like Michael Mann,

but he's a little bit, I like Miami Vice. Thought that was cool. The movie? Yeah, no, the know the show of course Yeah, it was a little too. I don't know Pacino took me out of it Really a little bit one of the best. Yeah, I got 16 year old prostitute dead on the thing saw if the chicken got

Yeah, weird. He was weird. Yeah. But still good. See Val kill him, kill him his elbow in that? You remember that? Yes. Fucking gross. What was it about?

He had an injury on his elbow. He hurt his elbow and he had this big. It's like an infection or something. Yeah, he had this big lump on his elbow the whole movie and I was like, I couldn't stop looking at it. It was fucking me up. Like stuff like that just fucks me up. Like Denzel's finger, Vince Vaughn's thumbs.

What's wrong with his thumbs? His thumbs, he's got no car accident. His thumbs are all fucking whacked out. Ew, I hate that. Yeah, they're all smushed or something. If you ever see what he did to you, he's always hiding his thumbs. Oh yeah, go ahead, go ahead Christine. See always hiding his thumbs. Oh, yeah. Go ahead.

Go ahead, Christine. See it for a second. Okay, good. Let me pay attention here. Wait, what are we looking at? We're looking at Edward Norton getting raped in the shower by his own people. So much for having that tattoo on your chest. Right there, right there, right there.

Oh, for sure. I'll take his pecker. I love that pecker. Why not? Look how far it was sticking out. He's turned three-quarter degrees. Look at that. Yeah, that's great. Flopping forward. He's turned three quarter degrees. Look at that.

Yeah, that's great. Flopping forward, that's nice. He edited this movie, you know he was like, I look good in that shot. Right? Leave that shot in. Oh, go back. Had a nice little boing to it too.

Little, you know what I mean? A little floppy boing. But I tell you what, though, you can tell though, without a doubt, he fluffed a little. It's a little stiff for what it is. But did he really have to fluff? He's naked with a number of naked guys taking a shower. What?

He had to knock it around a little bit. I don't think he knocked it around. I think he just looked at the guy. He's just excited about what's going on. I think he just looked at the guy and he's soaping his balls up next to him. Everyone in this jail has a great body, by the way. He has a wonderful body to prison. You never see too many fat guys in prison and then everyone leaves so you can get butt fucked

Now he gets whacked right here. They all fuck him look at you see it again No, just the main guy fucks him, but they give it to him pretty good good Christine. You could let us watch it He deserves it for the tattoo. Okay now Bobby now that guy's dink. That's terrible terrible Bobby Bobby yes, sir Do you take the body? You got to have the okay ready mm-hmm You have to have the arm racist tattoos Small they're all like small ones. Yeah now you can hide much easier, right? Mm-hmm

But you have to get a you get the body, but you have to get butt fucked by your own people Would you take the butt fucking for that body and smaller? Racist tattoos no look at he edited this to look at guys so happy about his butt He's got a great ass He knew what was gonna happen to why? Wow, oh He knew what was gonna happen too. Why? ow, ow In the shower, it's so no no it's not no you're wrong buddy You cannot have sex in water it dries it out Yeah, what's he do to asshole same thing?

No, I asked pussy baby. They soaked him up I think my ass pussy baby. They soaked him up Now there was no soaping up Bobby the way he got it in their first pump like that. Yeah that hurts No, no for sure. It hurts. I'm saying like there was something in there That would hurt his dick if he didn't put something on it. Yeah, I don't think he cares I think you've never raped a guy in a shower. So why don't you shut up? That's not what I'm saying First of all, how dare you fucking say that Bobby you've never raped someone the show Stop giving your yeah, I was in juvie hall You know what most likely to have raped or been raped in a shower is Bobby in this room that hurt

Cuz he's uh He's mad at them Cuz he sees when he got in the jail that these guys are just like they're prison Nazis They're just guys who were like we're not they don't give a shit. I just dropped jizz on him. Do you see that? Yeah They don't believe in the swastika. They just have them. They just have Tattoo, yeah, they don't that did that that hurt his assholes bleeding We had to stitch him up member he's laying on his belly when the principal comes in the principal from Buck Rogers I think yeah, the water doesn't lube it up

No Fuck. The principal from Buck Rogers, I think. Yeah, the water doesn't lube it up. No, shampoo, stuff like that. They don't have shampoo, it's a prison. Of course they have shampoo. You think they just water themselves down? Well, it's not like a thing of Brett. He walked in, threw him against the wall, and stuck it in, Jay. There was no...

But that would hurt his dick. Yeah, it did. Watch the first scene. He went, aah! No, but that's because he felt good. No, that's the... That's the throws of passion. That was the throws of passion.

That was both, if anything. Bobby, when was the last time you saw passion? That's true. I haven't seen it in a few months. A few years. Look at his face. Right here. Ready? One shot. Watch this.

One shot. Look at this. He goes... Wham! Boom! Now... Watch him. It's hurting him. No, it One shot. Look at this. He goes... Wham! Boom! Now... Watch him. It's hurting him. No it's not.

He loves it. He comes super fast. Wouldn't you? Look at that ass. That's one of the perils of looking that good, I guess. Oh, look at the slow motion water. Well, if you recall... You don't think about the downside of looking that good.

You know, it's the funny of like the same guy doing different things for the same character or for different characters. If you recall the movie 25th Hour, what's the one Patrice was in, 25th Hour? Yeah. 25th Hour, the Spike Lee movie, remember he has his friends beat the shit out of him before he goes to jail?

So because he's too pretty, he's like, yeah, I look too good. He goes, fuck me up. I can't go in there looking like gorgeous. So he hasn't beat him up. That is the peril of going with that body. You're right. If you get that body with that swastika, you find yourself in jail

and then you're telling them in jail, you're like, oh, no, I made a deal with a genie. I'd have to call you. I made a deal with a genie. And so the swastika is not real. They're going to go, so you're wearing a swastika, but you don't believe it. I go, yeah, you I made a deal with a genie and so the swastika is not real They're gonna go so you're wearing a swastika You don't believe in ago. Yeah, which is deal to get the body then you're gonna get butt fuck gonna get buck fuck But that at that point who cares? You're right. You already got the body. Yeah, I would be putting stuff in my ass every night to make it nice and wide. Yeah. Yeah

I'd be I'd be you're gonna train yourself I would train my ass training soon as they put it it would go right in they'd be like What he'd stop he'd be like what and you go and then you do and you look back at him And you do the thing where you make your asshole. I was doing the way. I just did it myself I would kegel you make your asshole tighten up around and you look back on he goes He would try to pull out of be like whoa, this is gay like you're not going anywhere fella Yeah, I clench on it Chinese finger trap Who I love it, huh?

That's hot Robert Kelly if you want to see that tight asshole It's gonna be at the Comedy Club of Kansas City January 23rd to the 25th after that Batavia, Illinois Levittown, New York Philadelphia, Pennsylvania You can catch Bobby every Tuesday night 7 p.m The Fat Black Pussycat Lounge the Comedy Cellar for tickets and tour dates go to punchup.live to the Comedy Cellar for tickets and tour dates. Go to PunchUp.live slash Robert Kelly and of course his new YouTube channel,

YouTube.com slash at Robert Kelly Comedy. Go right now. It takes five seconds, it's on your phone. Go subscribe. Big Jay is gonna be at the Desert Ridge Improv in Phoenix this Thursday, January 9th, then Tempe Improv January 10th and 11th. After that he'll be in Miami Orlando

Syracuse Ontario California at the improv for tickets and all of the tour dates visit him at big J comedy comm and punch up dot live Big J Okerson his special is gonna be dropping in February at some point They them them day them day. I Don't know point they them them day them day uh... uh... will be right back i think the city of our government