The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly - Why Would You Do That?
Episode Date: December 24, 2021Dave Attell joins The Bonfire as Jay and Dan discuss an article about a grammar school teacher's reenactment of the Holocaust with students that didn't go over well with the school or the parents.Stre...am "The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson & Dan Soder" for 3 months free on the SiruisXM app! Offer Details Apply: www.SiriusXM.com/BonfireFollow us on all social media @TheBonfireXM @DanSoder www.DanSoder.com@BigJayOakerson www.BigJayOakerson.com@Attell www.DaveAttell.com
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I'm Dan Soder and I'm Big J. Okreson and welcome to the Bonfire podcast.
You can hear our full show every day on SiriusXM.
Go to SiriusXM.com slash Bonfire for a special offer.
And now the Bonfire with Big J. Okreson and Dan Soder.
And we came back, you weren't here.
Sorry.
It's no big woop dude.
Alright, is everybody hearing this in the world?
I hope so. Yep. Oh shit, we're in the world? I hope so.
Yep.
Oh shit, we're on the air. I was so confused.
I thought I fucked up. I genuinely thought I fucked up.
Hey everyone.
Because, Dan, before we're on the air live,
I've been seeing someone seriously behind Christine's back.
Oh, it's Will Witsky.
Can I tell you, Jay, every single time?
Ever since I'm a asshole surgery. I'm gonna tell people all
Dan people are listening. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, they know about my two but holes
One for pleasure one for business. I'm an awkward starter
It's the bonfire
Series XM fact you talk 103 I'm dancer that's big J. Ehrerson. Hi
Join us our guest is hooking up or our guest is coming through the matrix
Where's the guy?
Yeah, the cigarette on the table. That's how you know it means business
Yeah, guys and cigarette in the mouth. I'm pleased welcome back to the show
One of the grace of all time,
you can catch a Caroline's December 27th
through the 30th, it's David Tell.
DavidTell.com for tickets.
Go check them out in New York City.
December 27th through the 30th.
I was thinking about it and Christine,
email me and I was looking at the email and we have the same thing from last year of like,
hey, we're not going to be in studio, we got to do it on Zoom. So we've come along with people.
We really are there. Look at us right back to where we were, just like kids.
All back down. But I was ready to come in. I brought the holiday treats. Oh, man, in person that would have
been awesome. Christine's got to change her panties after this. Not the first guy to be talking about
candy on Zoom, I assume. No, no, no, no, that's, I assume I tell people lower children over to their home. Candy. I'm gonna give it to a first responder. Why not? Yeah. If you're pulling bodies out,
dude, might as well have some Reese's or some Kit Kats.
What we're going for is when me and Christine came over to visit you,
I remember you had the when they were doing the cheering for the first
responders. And you had like a professional like trumpet player
would come do a whole thing. Yes.
Street from you were still. Yeah, it was like a Broadway guy or something right or symphony
Jay that was three variants ago
That's how I keep dying now because that's so three variants. That's funny. I always I measure a cost of things in shinler juice
How many juice is that cost?
Yeah, how many do I have How many juice could I have gotten?
What else could I have gotten? This guitar could probably be four juice. This globe could be half a
Jew. You get really black and white and I was watching that on the road. And I fell asleep and I came
I came back, you know, like I woke up and raging bull was on and I'm like, yeah, at least they're fighting back
This one they put you down fighting back
Which good you're doing the the week at Caroline's who's doing it with you this year?
I got a bunch of people coming in Nicole Amy is gonna be there's coming in from LA
Karen is gonna be there, you know at the stand.'s great. Honestly, yeah, I'm luck together and
Ian's gonna come by
Louis cast is gonna be there
Oh, and then we're gonna have probably have a couple of drop-by's but you guys are always welcome to come by I always offer
Honestly, if you want to always try to come at least watch one. I
Damn I can't think of anything better than Times Square this time of year.
Yeah.
People are coming together and just being together.
I don't know.
It's fine.
I was going to go lick some benches anyway.
And if I'm in the area.
I'll be in the area.
How about you guys?
You're going to be on the road holiday.
You're going to stay, uh, stay in New York.
I'm staying in New York.
Yeah.
I'm staying in New York.
I'm going to go, uh, I have a New Year's gig in Providence.
Oh, that'll be fun.
And that's it.
Yeah, and then we'll see.
We'll see if I don't have this COVID or not.
Wait, are you guys constantly testing?
Because that's the hard thing now is to get a test.
No. I got tested today. I'm waiting to hear back and I did, I did a rapid test because
I was in Boston all this weekend doing shows. So when I got back, I gave myself a
head. No, Danny means COVID. Danny means COVID. That's your eight, that's your home age tests.
Oh, no. Well, that's usually through a bunch of beakers in burning liquids. I would determine if I have HIV or not.
You know what?
The lines have never been longer.
I've been out of that.
It's crazy.
Looks like new iPhones are coming out.
You see that?
Yeah.
I've got COVID tents.
Yeah.
Oh, dude, I've used the tent.
In fact, the guy, I used the tent one time,
and the guy was like, hey, just a screen grab the picture of your of your code thing, you know, and he's like next time you
want to get tested, just walk up and show me this. I just like show it to him and he's like,
and you can get tested. Wow. Nice VIP. Oh, yeah, dude. it's the bottle service of COVID Dave
Instead of them bringing you a bottle of vodka with a sparkler in it. They shove a swab up your nose
Yeah, those swabs have gotten thinner and they go deeper with them now. Oh
But at least they should have a flap or something just a little privacy maybe I'm old. I don't know. Just fuck my nose in front of all these people.
Sorry Dave, we're way more open.
You're a live street person.
Yeah, we're way more open.
We do it in front of everyone.
I love the watch people getting tested.
I'm a warrior.
I'm a test warrior.
But sure, yeah, that's the new king.
Yeah, Christine, do you have that story up?
Because we were talking about Schindler's list,
this thing about the third graders acting out the Holocaust.
Is this like the, is this like the power experiments they used to do with the, I think it was
just an old way to do like police or like wardens and prisoners.
70s.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, not all the kids got super mean.
That's how my parents met.
My father was one of the guards, my mother, a prisoner.
Yeah.
Yeah.
In a mock prison.
Oh, God.
They met in mock prison.
What brought you two together, just role-playing?
Yeah, it was a...
It was an after school special.
They weren't sure.
I remember about that.
Oh, they didn't want to be... They didn't want to be... They didn't want to be... school special they were they were i remember about that
uh... they don't
you're turned all the kids in tenazis
well this is uh...
a certain librarian
and dc directed third graders can you go down
i can't read it
well the weird thing that the headline itself was weird it says
to reenact scenes from the holocaust like
you mean events of the holocaust
scenes are like that they think it. Yeah. You know scenes from that
fable, the Holocaust. You know that tell they tell to get sent me.
But isn't it real story here a librarian? I mean, if anybody just sits there quietly more,
it's these people. They're well, they're staked with so proactive, you know, well, yeah Dave
They're just sitting there kick cooking up cockamami schemes to make third graders relive the hall of
Squid games for children
Historical squid games for these children to participate in well apparently
This librarian and DC directed the third graders to reenact the holocaust including asking them to dig ditches for mass graves and simulate shootings
According to a according to email that the school's principal
That's parents. That's the part that's striking me more than anything here
Well all this information was given to them
According to an email the school's principal to parents late. Was he sending that email like
Hey parents just so you know we're doing the Holocaust
So we could be to get mass graves doing some
Couple guys what's going but it's principal Davis is one of that you guys do we're doing more of an immersive thing now
Where the kids actually live out the Holocaust we got one kid do they give one kid in structure to do it big
We're doing a bake sale fundraiser to be able to
afford the our bands. The our bands are pretty expensive. One
student was instructed to portray Hitler. Wow. Which that kid,
that kid's going to be obnoxious the rest of his life. Yeah.
I like it how it was digging ditches like she had them just do
like chores around her house. Yeah. Yeah. I it was digging ditches like she had them just do like chores around her house
Think of you ditches clean out those gutters, you know like in the holocaust
I don't know if you guys know this been in the holocaust a lot of Jews power washed driveways
It's gonna be funny after they they know nothing about the holocaust now, but they all know Karate like Karate kid
Did we learn? Did we learn about World War 2? No, are we efficient in Miyagi style?
Miyagi do Karate? Yeah, from the trees, from the trees, dig the hole
Do you keep an eye on them little Hitler? I'm going to Northstroms
Don't let these North from These little Hitler you're in charge to like it back
Yeah, and if you're good. I'll give you some speech juice
She's just giving a fucking booze just feeding these third graders dacqueries
You know when they asked the kids are gonna go. Oh, are you instructed to play Hitler's like instructed?
It was my honor
Yeah, I can't believe I was able to do that. It's to lead you. I got the lead in the
What did you do? What did you do today in school, Jimmy? And he's like I ran the third Reich
I mean you learned about the third Reich like no, no, no, there was a lot of important decisions to be made
No, I take Poland or not. I guess well, I led with Poland because obviously, you know a lot of important decisions to be made. No, I mean, Paul Winder not. He goes, well, I led with Paul Winder, because obviously, you know, a win to win.
Do this is crazy.
The staff member has been placed on administrative leave while the matter is investigated.
The episode has been referred to the district's central equity response team.
What do you think the thing, what do you think the tell was at the end of having the
reported?
Was it the ditches?
Uh, was it?
I bet it was little Hitler.
I bet little Hitler came in the clay.
I think little Hitler came back to like he went to math class too confident or art.
He was an art just being like, oh you don't mean he you don't think he turned on him.
He wasn't a rat.
You're saying he just wore it too long.
He kept going.
He took his Hitler act. He took his Hitler act in a lunch room. Doesn't that well?
Well, the student assigned to the role of Hitler is Jewish according to a panel.
His Hitler act. That's hilarious. He goes, ah, when I was in third grade, I had this Hitler act.
Oh, I would do this Hitler. Yeah, they wrote a play around it. I don't know, man. I just
this one librarian. What if she's one of these kids favorite teachers when they grow up?
Like, ah, I want to thank that librarian for teaching me. I don't think, Dave, did you ever have a
teacher when you were young that you felt even really cared enough to dig into a project like this?
I feel like all of our teachers were just getting through the 45 minutes.
I think a lot of them were teachers because they were dodging the draft.
So they were just.
I'm alive, you know, yeah, you can't kill.
I'm teaching.
I don't know who we used to fill out the ditto, you know, whatever that was.
But I don't ever I've never I've never had a dangerous mind,
turn the chair around type of teacher.
I never had one that just like took a such a major interest in like turning lives or teaching.
They were all just like fine with it.
None of them were that upset if you didn't do good.
Like I never felt the heart, the teacher that cares this much.
I can't say I had that was not a big influence on me.
If anything was not a big influence, me if anything was not a big influence
It was always like you know, you see this guy. He's dumb, but he's rich. Look at
I've had a sixth grade, but he you know cop a liar something
Would you know I have a a stand-in deliver
You got to learn math man. If you want to learn these Dave you got to learn math, man. If you want to learn these jokes, man, you got to
learn premises in punchlines, I say, I'm going to help you. I'm going to walk you through
it. I say, yeah, I never I can't think of one teacher who gave it shit. Teachers, this
is this kind of thing happened. Every time I trouble for playing hookie because a teacher
was even that concerned about that. They're like, whatever. No, but Jay, this kind of thing happened every time for playing hookie because a teacher was even that concerned about that they're like whatever
no but jay this kind of thing
happens once like every three years a teacher thinks they're really going to
break through by making them do like reenact a slave auction and then they're
like hey all the kids are mad all the kids parents are mad and you have to be
fired now or they try to make the where they try to take like that Michael Richards
like shock approach like you're all faggots.
Who words, words, words, words.
Am I right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
We're all saying crazy words.
What's the meaning behind the words?
We just go and start giving preachy lessons like, I think the teacher called us like
against today.
You know, it's the weird thing though is that they all wear masks.
So maybe they will associate masking with learning, you know?
Yeah.
I really need to tell you something.
Okay, let me put on my mask.
Yeah, hold on, let me get my,
let me get my not.
Get your magic power, you know, there's your cape.
Let me put on my knowledge muzzle and we'll get to work.
I don't know, man, this kind of thing,
this kind of stunt when they try to do this
is always backfires and never goes through.
So this person, I know more teachers,
I know more people who have fucked you
or stories of teachers who have fucked students
than teachers that have cared so much about students
that made it their entire lives.
Like Joe Clark and Lino on me,
where these people aren't out there.
Someone who cares that much about the youth,
they don't care.
They all do the cracks.
That's what happens.
Everybody I talk to in an audience who's a teacher
is always, I'm like, do you love it?
They're like, no.
So I hate it.
I just fucking count in time until I get my pension.
You know what's the point of teaching that
trying to take something you like and use it in the
curriculum.
Like, you like like matches, right?
Yeah.
What if I told you that was all science?
You know what?
Just because he worked at those like just because he worked.
Yeah, I guess you probably see him at those like fancy fucking like, you know, academy
schools. I mean, I bet there's teachers there who like really give a shit when you're a place. It fucking like a academy schools.
I mean, I bet there's teachers there
who like really give a shit when you're in a place.
It's like, you know, that's funny.
I bet from those pictures of him being a professor,
I bet Jeffrey Epstein, it was that teacher for so many people.
Like, people he didn't fuck,
just people were like, you know, this guy just cares, man.
He's so smart and he's just such a great guy.
He broke down economics like it was
almost like I was saving my allowance. He really changed the way I looked at money in general.
He did what? Oh not the Epstein I know. Not the Epstein I know. Not Professor Epstein. He wouldn't
do those things. Not teacher and he's like, guys, I want you to show tomorrow with a shovel where you pajamas.
Right?
We're gonna have quite a day.
Take the story down, Kristi, you make us all full screen.
God damn it.
That's so, man, I've never, yeah, that was that one famous one in the 70s where they had
the kids do the prison and stuff and they started being mean like right
Yeah, but that was at Stanford and it was college kids, so they were almost adults. This was the third graders
Yeah, well you get them young they should do that now now let's do the goes all right
I guess we're just do the prison thing. I was trying to mix it up
They don't like flashcards, so we got to act like their prisoners
So I can't do the Armenian genocide next quarter. Well, then I have to work on my curriculum.
Well, fuck me, Ronin, because in the spring, we were going to do the Sudanese Civil War.
I guess these kids aren't going to learn who the Hootsie, the Turingia,
I fucked it up. I didn't know the tribes, I blew it. That's pot.
You know what I think Bob said it best.
Doesn't get a nice tension. These kids want to learn, man.
Yeah, who takes just a bold experiment like that?
I mean, every teacher I've ever had was absolutely okay.
If it was a day where they could just show us a TV thing
or a movie or something, they would just would.
Like, they just never were, they just did exactly what the book said and
wanted to like eat their bagel and drink their coffee while we did work.
Did you guys do field trips?
Because that was like a learning experience, you know, like,
yeah, what was your, what was your favorite field trip you ever went on?
We went to, I lived on the line.
So we went to go where news day was made.
Paper. So we went to go where news day was made. Ooh, paper.
The print center guy, you know, it's like three fingers, you know.
The printing machine is a hungry animal.
Not operating when you're drunk, you know.
And then we went like ramen where they made missiles.
So they were really training us up for a couple of different careers
But I remember like these weird field trips like, you know, you know
Hey, you know if it doesn't work out in school, we're gonna tell you to take you to a place where you might get it
Yeah, yeah
This if you loop those those first
We're gonna take you by a union office get comfortable here. I owe school trips for me though.
I think we said this in the show a while back.
A couple of years ago we talked about this,
but school trips, like the field trips,
like the day long ones where we go to like DC
and look at all the historic stuff.
I bring back nothing of the rich history
or whatever we were doing or the information we were doing.
It was always about like hooking up or talking to a girl
or something or what you can get while you were out there.
Like what could we buy while we're out there?
Yeah, some gift shop and shit.
Like it's all we ever cared about.
Yeah, imagine wanting to learn on a field trip.
Well, there was like also less penalties
like the other teacher and you went out with like 20 kids
and you came back with 18
Two of them we're gonna have a story Yeah, I also think field trips where I thought you saw teachers get loose a little bit
I definitely saw a few of them crack a cigarette once or twice. Oh, dude
The best was always when you would have shaperones that were kids in your class as parents and you got to see either how big a dork how mean they were. We were like oh oh
Nick's mom's fucking mean. I shaperone I shaperone once and they literally
always bells friends thought I was a pirate they said and then it just it
looked off the optics of it looked bizarre. It's always like three moms and one
unemployed dad you know. Yeah that like three moms and one unemployed dad.
You know, yeah, that was me.
I was the unemployed dad.
Yeah, that's what it was.
I would go, you're going to say kids, I'm kind of in a rut right now,
but I think I can watch you look at dinosaur bones.
I was thinking about all like in New York,
just like all the stuff that you would never do with the large group
because like we would get on the Long Island Railroad
and then get in the Penn station.
And while holding hands get in the Penn station and while holding hands
Walk through Penn station to the subway then we get on the subway. It was like there's a million ways that would go wrong now
You know, yeah, I would have been like a horrible experience. I was I was I was a
subway
Do you know dead? I was a I think there's bad Isabella
When I would take her to Girl Scout stuff,
like I was the only father that ever went.
And you know, she went to like a free port one.
So it's like kind of the hood.
Her Girl Scouts thing.
And so I would sit and say,
I go, is it Bella?
Am I the only father who ever comes to this stuff?
And she was like, yeah, I go,
no father, is it weird that I come?
Like, do no other father's come?
And she goes, Dad, I kept saying this, it's like kind of loud.
And she was like, dad, a lot of them don't have fathers.
And like, she wasn't wrong as the thing,
like a bunch of them just didn't have fathers around.
So, so they were, they were getting so awkward.
Yeah, they would like be very much.
Yes, you guys, you guys had East Coast field trips.
I grew up in Colorado.
So we would go to caves or places where we killed Indians
That was a big one. They would just take us. They just take it to where like massacres happened of Native Americans
Yeah, like this is where the slot the slaughter the slaughter of Aurora
Yeah, no, but they would they'd be like all right well, we can go over to cripple creek where it was a mining town
They love taking us they would take us to jobs that don't exist anymore like silver miners or like fucking donkey trainers
Yeah long island I think they should have took you guys like Boeing and like a DJ academy
It's too ways of it possibly turn out. This is a gym some of you guys are gonna be personal trainers
Welcome to the exciting field of catering
Party, but you do everything
I was out there and like honestly honestly, that town is all north face.
Everybody there looks like they're ready to climb something.
I mean, everybody.
Do they wake up and you can't take off your fleece in Colorado or you don't?
And I've been watching all these movies about these guys who were like master rock climbers
and all of them were on the spectrum. And I've been watching all these movies about these guys who were like master rock climbers.
Yeah, all the more on the spectrum, you know, it's, that's the thing that they like latch onto this like life into the thing.
But I was just thinking like growing up how like rock climbing was like, I guess for you, for you guys, that was like, you know, consider like, yeah, okay, cool.
You're smart and all, but how's your, you know, how's your assent?
You know, can you free climb? Well, how high can you free climb? Or, you know, how's your assent? Can you free climb?
How high can you free climb?
Or, you know, what's going on?
But also, Dave, that's interesting.
I didn't know they're on the spectrum.
It's kind of, that's the West Coast version
of autistic kids with trains.
Is Colorado autistic kids just know how to climb real well?
They're all like, it's amazing.
Like their moms are like, you know,
we didn't know what to do with them,
but then he got involved in this rock climbing
and like it really really like it was like
We call them koala brains in in Colorado
I
We would climb power, you know like telephone poles and power cables and stuff like that and that was like amazing like this guy cut like right up to the wire
power cables and stuff like that. And that was like, you know, amazing. Like this guy cut like right up to the wire, you know, this guy's like a ma- this guy's like magical. Like he's alive, you know.
Yeah, we had some towers and stuff you can climb like that. Like the, hey, like a Leon
Leonardo DiCaprio and Gilbert Grape. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This climb in the whole town has to come over
and get you down. Water power. One thing, you know. Yeah, dude. We had a bunch of that, but I always feel like in Denver though now, I love Denver, by
the way, but I feel like everybody there is.
I think they're dressed like they're ready to go climbing anytime, but I think it's just
a look out there.
I think people move there from all over now.
I think it's a very like, it's a very like, what do you call that?
Transplant town at this point.
And I think it just goes there and can't wait to put on the, they're nicest like, what do you call that? Like transplant town at this point. And I think it was just, goes there and can't wait
to put on the, they're nicest like,
you don't know.
You don't have Tony Hinchcliffe moved to Austin
and now he rocks the cowboy look.
Yes, exactly.
Everybody goes to Colorado and then they,
no matter where they're from, they moved to Denver
and then they go to the REI and they just come back out
looking like a different person
and hiking boots and light jeans.
Yeah, you have like your pants are always like held
on by suspenders.
Yeah, you have a, you have a no-wording suspenders?
Yeah, you have a trail mix recipe.
I'm going to let you're a barman, you call it base camp.
Yeah.
So I woke up at base camp and then I ascended to work
where I worked for seven to eight hours.
I only deal in military time and not measurements.
Yeah.
Is they good?
Oh, go ahead, Dave.
No, I had nothing.
I was just like, I did DC, that was awesome.
And then I did Denver.
Like I had some towns and there's a lot of fans,
comedy fans like watching this.
So I had a lot of towns during the,
I guess you could say the good, good months
when I was in the house.
This is awesome, you know, like this is great.
And then there was a couple of, you know,
there was a couple of like rough and ready towns as well,
but the majority of the crowds that came out were,
I think we can all agree with great,
but soul jails continuously brings it.
Crazy.
I mean, honestly, it's amazing how this guy has put that together. It's really great. It's gone
Yeah, those those those is it really the dome's gone. It's gone. Yeah, they move to another location, right?
That's what I don't think he has a no, I think it's just like using temporary locations. I might be wrong about that
But I said he hasn't have an actual official location. Yeah, was that Joel's so that dome was his field of dreams if you build it they will come yeah I think
he's gonna definitely get ran out by the locals damn really but yeah that was I mean that was killer
that that was one of the gigs it saved comedy in the quarantine really did yeah and he showed me
he said it was like I'm bringing it indoors I'm like you should just keep doing this outdoors
I mean like it's just like one of the best honestly it had
You know it was like you need to play red rock when you're out west
Here's what you do dude, but they did that audience had the feel of a 70s concert film like they were like
There were always like Jesus you guys are fucking into this. It was great
Dave had you ever done comedy at Red Rock for like an hot ball or something?
Yeah, no, I hosted like a band thing
and a long, long time ago and I was like,
this is like an amazing thing for everything but comedy.
You know, I was gonna say that guy,
it's the most amazing thing for bands,
but I couldn't see doing comedy there being awesome.
It's like too cool.
Like there was a surround,
it was like that red lights and all that shit.
And like that's where Inkybiz is supposed to play.
You're not supposed to tell a come joke.
Okay, it's like a Greek amphitheater.
Like it's supposed to do some kind of crazy,
you know, like speech or something,
cause you're standing on rocks, sitting on rocks, and you're like in front of them, you know, I felt weird something, could you stand on rocks sitting on rocks and you're like in front of them
You know, I felt weird. I just felt weird the whole time
But the cool of it is is that like you know for some reason like
People party extra hard when they're there because they're like, you know, I don't know
It's like we're at Red Rock and like I know the dead play there like every couple of months or something
I don't know what they do
But they always eat the starter and it's where they're, and I'm always in Denver when that happens.
Like the dead are playing and it's funny,
because like you'll be in a hotel
and there'll be like a 60 year old guy
dressed like we were talking, you know?
And you know, this is like my hundredth concert
or something like that.
Yeah.
Never the number is,
and you're just like,
hey, we all think different things in life, you know
Those guys go it's like it's like the I think
The average of someone who would call himself a dead head is like hundreds of
Hundred would be like you can't even get me the merch table. I think yeah, what what are you at DJ? Little what are you at for Pearl Jam shows?
82
Yeah, you're not even you're barely a fan I think it's barely a fan
dude you're garbage that sucks I thought you gave it shit it's not true it's not true
I can't believe it's not in triple digits you fucking damn man you're actually you're an
Irvana guy I guess what only tore every three years this is all I can do Dave have you
watched any of the HBO music box documentaries?
No, I haven't seen him yet. The Woodstock one or anything. Oh
Yeah, yeah, I saw that one. Yeah
Yeah, that was wild. That was a that was a crazy documentary. They made a couple of them now
They have this one about this guy juice world. I just watched the Atlanta smartest set one was good. Are you watching them all, DJ Lou?
Yes, every single one I saw.
Are the, I didn't see the one about the guy
who started disco.
Was that great, Mr. Saturday night?
Yeah, that was probably the best one.
Oh, really?
Yeah, watch that one.
What are these on again?
These are on HBO Max.
They're on HBO Max, but there's one and you watch the juice world one.
Oh, what a piece of shit that I watch it.
It's just worlds a rapper quote unquote, I guess the got
a entertainer that got killed or didn't get killed.
Or a he he OD, right?
That's right. That's right.
It must have been where it's just a document.
I don't know like a year or so ago, but he.
It's the music is completely auto-tuned nonsense the documentary is a bunch of people just saying how great he was, but it's all
Just dumb people it seems like the people like interviewing always like yo, he had a next level thing
And then we just him doing auto-tuned stuff and non-stop taking drugs crushing up pills and doing a non-stop
So and then they're like and then sadly he died you know like let me stop you right there die from an OD
That was coming a mile away. It was just
I don't know if it was more like a celebration of his music or what it was just
terrible
It was so like I just never felt I never felt
less bad for a person's legacy who passed away. I wouldn't be able to tell you a
juice world. Do you have any music, Lou? Well, that's also those documentaries that
don't do serve. When you watch a documentary about someone that doesn't do
many service, we're like, oh, you've made me not like this person more and I think
that wasn't your intention. What's the song called?
Lucid Dreams. This is his hit.
That sounds like Post-Malone.
Dave, you're a big fan, right? You have all of Juice World songs.
What is that?
Scrillics or...
No.
Scrillics actually makes those noises though like this guy's just saying words.
No, there's a microphone and production happening around him.
I don't understand what was.
Are the lyrics that great?
I don't know.
It just sounds like one note over and over again in this.
So why does it make it go hours long?
I don't know why that's what I want to ask HBO Max.
Why did they make a documentary about this guy?
I want to watch the Atlanta Smart 7, because she was definitely
like a road warrior.
She toured so hard like through the entire 90s, I guess,
whatever.
Yeah.
She was just like incredible.
Like I remember all those like just fast outdoor,
like all that kind of stuff over and over and over.
So, you know.
What's funny about her is she still looks great, by the way,
but what's funny is she doesn't like a mom now.
It went, I stopped seeing her ever when she was still
the mousy, female Jim Morrison slinking around thing.
And now to see her, she's just like a mom.
She looks completely a mom, but she I mean like but it is pretty funny and she says now that
that song is not about Dave Queh bull shit bull shit she said I was do you remember that you ever
hear that theory Dave? Yeah yeah I did yeah it's my first thing I ever said to him.
I'm alive that was always the weird thing of like, well, what then I look at his
tour dates and he's playing the same clubs, you know,
he's gotten more of a pop all of it.
Yeah. The Atlanta's more set push.
I get the more sent bump.
Yeah, he goes, I did full house them.
Atlanta's more said set.
I was a piece of shit.
So that's how it out.
We've another thing. a Lannis Morris said I was a piece of shit, so that's how it happened. One's the last time you guys went to a live show though, like one's the last time you went to like a concert.
I went to a concert a couple weeks ago with Ari and Katie.
We went and saw LCD sound system.
Okay.
And did they check everything like that kind of thing?
Yeah, they checked to make sure everyone was vaccinated. And then it was good. You
know, it was, it felt like pre pandemic kind of. You only saw a couple of people in
masks. Yeah. Let me tell you something. I, we went to see
Genesis live walking in thinking Genesis live for the first time in my life at the
garden.
If I get COVID for this, I understand. And I left leaving saying, I wouldn't have taken a light hang nail for that horrible horrible show, horrible horrible show. How dare he? How dare he suck so bad.
Wow. That said, well, he's sad. Well, he's very old.
He's sitting in a chair the whole time.
They don't, they don't, uh, you know, what are you called?
They don't promote that at all.
You get there and he's sitting in a chair.
Not even a stool.
They don't pay him enough to stand up.
He said, you want me to get up?
Give me more money.
I always want more money. And then he gets up and walks with a cane like off
When they left and I saw that they're doing an encore and I saw him leaving the stage before the encore
I was like, oh god. Oh, man. I'm gonna be 20 minutes to get him back out on the stage. I'm like this leave him there
So what's it throw a blanket over him like that comic? What was that? Oh, I'm a reporter. Oh, I'm a generator. Yes
throw a blanket over him like that comic. What was that?
All the Joe Porter.
All the Joe Raider.
Yes.
Just throw the blanket over him.
Jesus, like I'm going to sit here and smoke a cigarette under the sheet.
Pull it when he want me to sing.
Is it not as much for Gordon the coolest?
Like I did that 9-11 benefit.
That was a Pete Davidson and John Stewart's, you know, Charlie.
Yeah.
First responders.
And like honestly, like the like, system they have there,
it's like such an amazing, amazing experience.
And then we, because we're backstage,
we got to see, like, you know, like, the load in,
like, we're like, it's played there.
They would, like, load in, like, you know,
20 RVs or whatever it was.
Like, it's crazy.
Imagine in your mind, like, all the crazy stuff that went on there.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's a pretty cool place.
That's got to be bad ass.
You especially get to see all behind the scenes thing.
One time I got to go to the WWE was at Barclays Center.
And I had been to the Barclays Center before for concerts
and stuff, but I went with Michael Che.
And since the WWE and SNL have a good relationship,
they sent them a car and they drove us in and took an elevator down.
It was fucking crazy.
That is cool.
I've never made that.
Then you get to see a bunch of men in their underwear, dude.
Yeah, dude.
I did. And some of them took home the US championship that night, Jay, and two of them were in a ladder match.
So, watch Change Tone.
Did he pictures with you like you were a make a wish kid?
No, they didn't.
Were you gave number one fingers, number one forever fingers?
I was too scared to ask.
No, no selfie in the headlock.
Come on.
Yeah, damn it.
Where were you guys when I needed you that afternoon
before I went or I could play on my photos?
Did we, I don't know if I said this on air or anything or not,
but my thing was seeing celebrities on an airplane.
Now it's like, if I notice someone the plane starts,
I'd rather be on a plane with no celebrities
because when I am, I'm consumed the whole trip
with what I have to do or not do to say.
I understand them.
I was just recently on a flight in Kevin Durant
was sitting on a row in front of me.
Oh, that's what I mean, man.
And you're like, you just don't say nothing.
Well, sports is easier for me because if you're not on my team,
I can give two fucks about you.
You tell everyone's messed up though.
He was six foot nine and you know, like he looked like Kevin Durant with the man.
Oh, Kevin Durant, I don't know because like he says,
where are you now?
Well, Kevin Durant is a zillionaire and for some reason it looks like a fire broke out on his head. I don't know why like he says well Kevin Durant is Zillionaire for some reason
it looks like a fire broke out on his head
I don't know why his hair is like that
Dude he does his, he has peshy home alone one head
It's can you bring up a picture of Kevin Durant's hair?
If you like right that, everyone will,
there'll be a lot of pictures.
It must be talked about a ton.
That is the hilarious these guys that stay in basketball
so long now,
like LeBron James and stuff watching their hairlines go back and the ball. And then you
get to see one season where their hairline comes back because they got the surgery.
Hell yeah. Jay what's the liberty to be flown with? It's not Jesus. It's a mess that
hair. It's I flew with the...
Well, you're just with Fat Joe.
Yeah, Fat Joe.
That's the awkward one.
No, they're all awkward to me.
Because I thought...
But that was the only one you try to talk, you know what I mean?
Yeah.
Fat Joe, the Rizzah from Wu-Teng Clan.
And, oh, there's been like one or two more.
I can't think of what they were.
But like, it doesn't,
because I've never said anything to them, but I really,
oh no, I flew,
the lead singer of anthrax and his wife,
I knew them briefly.
So that wasn't a weird introduce.
Like we did the same,
like the same like a gigs together before.
So like, that wasn't so weird.
But the fat Joe,
yeah, the whole flight,
I'm like, what am I gonna say?
Dude, fat Joe's gonna think I rule with what I say. And then it just, he did not at
all. And then I ran like I got away from as fast as possible because I felt embarrassed
by saying something at all. Yeah. And then when I got far away from him, somebody recognized
me, which would have been so cool for him to see. Yeah, you're like, you did not at all. We're really what's the biggest celebrity you've flown with Dave? I really, I was in the airport
one time and Mitt Romney was a walking to the gate or something like that. I really wanted to
be sure though. That thing was all all like waving and everything like that.
But I really can't really put my, I don't know the celebrities
like you guys do.
Like I don't know who to and all that kind of stuff.
Yeah.
I think I would have never, I think someone from Babel on five,
you know, like, when it's cool, or something.
You just fly to like L.A. or Aspen or something.
You have to go to like celebrity places to see this
celebrity.
I was when I was at the cellar the other day and Kevin Hart
was on stage upstairs.
It was a Che.
And somebody else just felt like a bit of a
a little bit of a star studded knight.
And I looked across the room while the band was playing.
It was packed and I go, oh shit, and Erica Badoos here and Christine was like really where I go right over there
that you can see their silhouette I go it's definitely only Erica Badoos has
dread you know the those braids and that whenever they go all the way down her
back and wears that wrap and a big pilgrim hat that's her look that's her
thing now right you see it there? It was it was not
her at all. It was like a closer. It was just a woman that dresses identically to Eric
Abadoo. But I was I was moving forward with the confidence that it was definitely her.
Yeah. Were you like that's 100% Eric Abadoo. My God. It's another lady that just decided
to look like Eric Abadoo. So you, if you thought celebrity that you knew,
would you like engage with them like, you know,
hey, what would you do?
No, I think it'd be too awkward.
I would always beat you.
I, the last celebrity that I approached to say something
to was a wrestling manager named Paul Heyman
because we were on two flights together.
And I was like, it was just awkward and I felt stupid
and I walked away being like, that was it, I shouldn't have done that.
You're an NWO for life, I gotta go.
I know, I just wanna let you know, I think ECW ruled.
Thank you for creating it.
We should let Dave go because we gotta take a commercial and then when we come back, we
just, we went long so when we come back, we're gonna have to just end the show anyway.
So let's say Dave of course is gonna be at Caroline's
the shows of the year at Caroline's yeah, absolutely. It's a tradition. It's a holiday tradition back. It's gonna be
Hopefully I save fun week and thank you again guys for having me on. It's great to connect again with your fans because of the ultimate
Comedy people. So I hope to see you guys down the road.
27th 30th. It's the it's the shows of the I really it's my favorite thing in New York comedy is David.
So David tell Doc.
I'm if you're in New York go go check them out at Caroline's December 27th through the 30th and then Dave.
We'll have to have you back in studio the second. We're back to hang out.
Anyway, Christine. Thank you and guys be safe be safe and hopefully I'll see you guys over the
next couple of weeks, you know.
Absolutely, Dave.
Take care.
See you Dave.
And we will be right back everybody.
It's the Bound Fire.
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