The Commercial Break - Brother Cousins, Zero Times Removed!

Episode Date: March 24, 2023

Bryan's not afraid to say it...he is against cousin-fucking! When all else fails, block those cousin-fuckers from the family facebook page. My left foot foots?  TCB has finally made it, because we�...��re getting spammed by Russian troll farms! The Evolution of Trolls Bryan & Krissy had a messy trip to Costa Rica in 2013 Krissy, rum, and a lovely conversation with the police The racoons ate Krissy’s birthday cake! Would you marry your cousin? Bryan found a documentary on two first cousins who are married If you can see the head of your penis through your jeans…leave those jeans at home First kiss, first crush, first love, first cousin Cool it, Angie! Taking it to the family facebook page Cousin Fuckers, by TCB These people do not understand science WE is now Cinemax After Dark To the park for a petition! LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 I saw her feet and her feet are so beautiful. I fell in love with her feet all over again and got my pillow and got down to the end of the bed and started to work on her feet and I massaged her feet while she explained how heavenly that was. And then after I got all the lotion worked in real good, I kissed each toe separately, each toe. I kissed him and then I massaged her feet some more and then I kissed her toes some more. The end of each toe I kissed it some more and and Told her how much I loved her and told her toes how much I loved them too and I was shaming you men who never massaged your wife white feet.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Shame on you. Amen. On this episode of the commercial break. Dear mom and dad, slash aunt and uncle. Okay kids, I know Aunt Debbie was here last year with her husband, but this year she's my wife. So now you've gone from cousins to brother and sister cousins. Once removed. Once removed.
Starting point is 00:01:14 You are brother cousins, no time's removed. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Ah, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to another episode of the commercial break. I'm Brian Green, this is my dear friend and co-host, Kristen and Joy Holt, like best to you, Chris. Bestie Brian. Bestie you out there in the Vod gas universe. Why not? Start off in a good mood.
Starting point is 00:01:38 That's what I always say. Start off on the right foot and on the wrong foot. What was that? Um, my two left foot foot. What was that? My two left foot foot. Do you remember that? My left foot foot. The foot foot. And I used to, there used to be a band when I was in high school that they called left foot down.
Starting point is 00:01:57 Left foot down. Well, that was a band that actually had like music you would listen to. Yeah. But then we did that. What was it called like outside or music? Yeah, outside or music? Yeah outside or music This way back in season one and we reviewed the very famous in some circles song my left foot foot or my two foot foot
Starting point is 00:02:18 My to left foot foot was by like the gangrene sisters Back in the heyday. Now we're just old and worn out. That's a bad, that's a commercial big. How you doing? It's easy to be bad guys. Clicked your index. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot.
Starting point is 00:02:35 My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot.
Starting point is 00:02:44 My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. My left foot foot. I think we've made it. And here's how I know we've made it. I think we've made it. I think it's very possible we have more than 10 listeners. Okay. Because we are officially getting spammed by Russian troll farms. And I know this to be a true, it's like a fact. It's not even a question mark. So congratulations, Chrissy. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:59 Break it on Russian troll farms. We don't have no issues tackling you. I talked about writing a response. So on one of our Instagram posts. We were talking about how I think that fast food, the people who get paid minimum wage should at least be paid a decent living wage so that they would give a shit about their jobs,
Starting point is 00:03:14 such as fast food workers who just could care less about whether or not you get the food hot and tasty, right? And I claimed that the, or I thought the reason why, one of the reasons why might be the fact that they have to sleep in their car at night. The fact that the chef had McDonald's, the cook at McDonald's cannot even afford the same burger he's cooking. That should tell you something. So we got this silly reply. You can go on our Instagram and see it. This silly comment that was like, you know, okay, you've identified the problem now. Big guy. Now give me the solution. Well, the solution is to fucking pay them more.
Starting point is 00:03:47 That's the solution. If the poverty line is $26,000, pay them enough to make $27,000. There you are. That's the solution. It's not a political thing. It's just a decent human being thing, right? Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:04:00 So I go and I, and actually I didn't do this. Astrid did this first, but she was like, I'm gonna go investigate this guy who's like, you know, given us a hard time. He has 17 followers. He has zero posts and you saw his profile. I did. His profile.
Starting point is 00:04:13 Not Mary or Mary. Mary not looking for a hook. Yeah. Yeah. And conservative conservative. Who writes that on their profile? Absolutely no, but not looking for a hookup. Yeah, I don't care how married you are. You don't put not looking for a hookup. Well, in other news, just to show you how
Starting point is 00:04:32 often I go on social media, I just realized that for my birthday, a month ago, you guys had posted a really sweet. You're so plugged into the commercial break, Chrissy. Yeah. You're the fucking co-host. You don't even look at our Instagram. I don't look at anybody's Instagram. And I explain this to Jeff, because Jeff's a big Facebook person, although he has to kind of use that for work and that kind of thing. But I like to protect myself from the trolls out there.
Starting point is 00:05:06 I like to protect, I believe that humanity is good. And if I'm on Christian media, I'm on social media too long. My view of humanity starts to go down. Here's my view of humanity. We're all about your assholes. And or I feel like I should be traveling to Bali. I mean, yeah, I mean, and having an Instagram body,
Starting point is 00:05:29 and I'll wear it any clothes. Yeah, I feel like I should be lifting weights for times today. I know. Listening to Jordan Peterson and believing in some wild conspiracy. Yeah, so I have to strategic strike. I get it. I get it. You don't want to put yourself in a bad mood on it. You don't want to, you don't want to put yourself in a bad mood on purpose. You don't want to put yourself out there in a way to get
Starting point is 00:05:49 attacked by people. You don't care about in the first place. And you don't want to read about. I look at other people attacking other people. Yeah, that's what the thing is is I don't believe that those are other people. Most of the time, there is a point at which people who follow this kind of thing follow the evolution of technology. And they said that there's a point at which there's more fake content on the internet and fake creations and creators on the internet than there are real. It's like a tipping point. And a lot of people that follow this kind of thing I believe we've already reached that tipping point that there are more trolls out there
Starting point is 00:06:32 Downloading the commercial break that there are real people listening Because so many people are rigging the system gaming the system finding a way to make it to use AI to their advantage What the advantages of a Russian troll commenting on the commercial break, it just makes them look real in the eyes of Instagram. They're also trying to so dissent and anger so that, so essentially they can do what's already been done to the country which is terror at a part. Now, I believe we're doing this from the inside out also,
Starting point is 00:07:01 but I do believe that there's a lot of outside influence. These people are smart. They're smart. They got good game. They got all the time in the world. They set up like news sites that are mirroring an actual newspaper. It was, yeah. That's that was scary to me when I heard about that a while back. The scariest thing to me was during the 2016 election, they were creating fake events. They were organizing Facebook events and people were showing up to them by the thousands and they were manufactured verifiably by Russian bot farms.
Starting point is 00:07:36 So listen, and it's not a political thing I think it's happening on both sides of the earth. I think there are plenty of outside influences. If you're liberal, plenty of outside influences. If you're conservative, me, I'm just a pragmatic asshole who doesn't know much, but I did spend the night of the holiday in last night. Prachmatic pragmatists.
Starting point is 00:07:50 Pragmatic pragmatists is what I am. Right down the middle. It's currently right down the middle. But I just, the fact that a Russian troll farm would even target the commercial rate. We have made it. And I say, if Russian troll farm, if you'd like to do us a favor and give us like 10,000
Starting point is 00:08:07 followers, we take it because we've been stuck at 800 for two years, two years. Then again, we only made one post in the last two years. And that was Chrissy's birthday, and she didn't even see it. Asher took all that time and we've collected pictures. We're so sweet. I know. Yeah. I enjoyed that.
Starting point is 00:08:24 Fuck you. Baguette. I thought you said that. You thought. Yeah. Yeah. I enjoyed that. Fuck you. Baguette. I thought you said baguette. Yeah. We found our picture from Costa Rica when we went. God, what a fucking crazy trip that was. Man, was that a crazy trip? I mean, this is not the topic of today's show, but do we ever get to the Topic It Today show? 90% of the time now, because this is what happens. Kristian and I, I had a friend, my best friend, at the time, Raphael convinced his entire family
Starting point is 00:08:54 to pick up their entire lives. That his father-in-law had a successful law practice. He convinces him to sell the law practice and get in the coffee bean business in Costa Rica, of which they know nada, nada shit. They don't know shit from Shinole about the coffee business, Costa Rica, they visited one time. They had a really nice vacation for two weeks.
Starting point is 00:09:17 Everybody that goes to Costa Rica loves it. I know, and then a month later, they're moving there. I'm like, you guys are out of your mind. He's like, no, bro, this is the coolest thing, he's best thing I can ever have. I go, you're moving with your father-in's like, no, bro, this is the coolest thing he's best thing I've ever had. I go, you're moving with your father-in-law and his new wife down to Costa Rica for what reason?
Starting point is 00:09:30 We're gonna be coffee. You know the fucking first thing about coffee? What are you talking about? And predictably, the first two years, a little rough around the excuse. Right, but they do, they had a great operation by the time we got down there, right? Well, now they are owners of the company Thrive Coffee,
Starting point is 00:09:46 which is like the fourth largest coffee collective in the world. And so they've done okay for themselves. I would say that everything worked out just fine. But Chrissy and I had to go to Costa Rica because when your best friend lives in Costa Rica, you gotta go to Costa Rica. That's what you do.
Starting point is 00:10:01 So I'm going down there. I'm gonna spend like a month or so. Yeah, I think I had just lost my job. And we both just lost our jobs. Yeah, we just luckily. We're gandily unemployed. I had a company with Raphael that sold this search engine marketing services.
Starting point is 00:10:16 Hey, you want to be on the first page to Google? $500 a month, a paper click campaign, no problem. Trying to sell it to like, Coastery can tire shops. There's a new thing called Google. Okay, yeah, whatever, bro. So we go down to Costa Rica. We get picked up by Rafael. The first thing that we do is we stop at a gas station so we can pick up a 12 pack of
Starting point is 00:10:41 whatever beer. What was that Tico Rico or something? Something kind of beer. And it tells you all you need to know about Costa Rica. It is such a great time. It is so fucking beautiful. Everybody there is so damn nice. There's almost no violent crime.
Starting point is 00:10:55 They have no standing army. They have no... They treat their elders really well. It's a great place to retire. And it's a third world country where you might have a shack sitting on the side of the road, but you're gonna clean up, there's not gonna be a speck of dust
Starting point is 00:11:09 on the floor of that shack. You wanna know why they take pride in what they have and they know the value of their little paradise. You can't just go down there. I mean, in some cases, I'm sure there are deals to be found, but generally speaking, you can't just go down there and steal paradise for a dime. It's not gonna happen. Why? Because they're very protective over what they have. And that is
Starting point is 00:11:29 paradise. It really is. So, Chrissy and I decided to do this. Just rain for us. They've got it all. Zip lines, howler monkeys, really large scorpions and snakes. They've got it all. It's like Australia less deadly. You know what I'm saying? I don't think Australia has any jungles. But anyway, that doesn't add grass. So Chrissy and I decide to do what two Americans do when they find paradise. We went there and pissed all over. That's what we think.
Starting point is 00:11:52 I got a drug in the bar. Oh my God, that was the crazy. Yeah. I took a liking to that rum. Yes, you did. The floreboma, was that it? No, it was. What was that rum? It was so good
Starting point is 00:12:07 Yeah, think of Flo Mar or something. I don't know what it was, but it was some kind of rum and Chrissy really took a liking to it so much she took a liking to it that the last night before she left She drank almost the bottle of it by herself I had to carry her back to the hotel room and she was outside yelling at the police office Sitting down this street and I was like get your ass inside before we get arrested and you were in a great conversation. You were the police officer. I'm in a great conversation. That's your version of it. My version of it was please don't get arrested. Please don't get arrested.
Starting point is 00:12:44 We didn't. We survived. You woke up the next morning and you're like, can you help me take my bags downstairs? And I was like you got to be fucking kidding You picked the wrong guy for that job. I am so hungover. I'm going back to bed I bet that was the most miserable car ride Okay, it was two and a half three hours to to the airport. Oh, fucking bus. The airport. Yeah, yeah, we were up in the sticks. It wasn't like, it wasn't a hopskip, a jump. And on.
Starting point is 00:13:10 On a Monday. I don't know if you had a similar experience on your bus ride down the mountain. It's really only like 35 miles away the airport, but the problem is it's a real bus. The roads are not roads, it's just dirt. And we're on the top of a fucking mountain range and you gotta get down.
Starting point is 00:13:27 And I don't know about you. I think I've told this story before. On my bus ride, I had like four people. The chickens and the. Chickens and the guy that was smoking crack in the back of the bus. And he wasn't even trying to hide it. He was smoking crack on the back of the bus.
Starting point is 00:13:41 And my bus driver decided that anytime there was a fruit stand and a lapis stand, a grocery store, a cousin long lost cousin he found, he would just stop the bus, take the keys and get out. They back in a minute. Hey bro, I don't even think I slept the whole way back. I would, but I was high on secondary crack. Cook, smoke.
Starting point is 00:14:04 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck,
Starting point is 00:14:16 buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck. To, oh, this place was incredible. I mean, it was definitely a splurge, but it was my birthday and you know how much I love my birthday and we hadn't been anywhere major because of COVID. Where did you guys go again? Oh, we went to, um, God, I mean, it's on that, it was on the west coast. It was on the west coast.
Starting point is 00:14:40 Yeah. So hot co area, like near Guanaquastas. Guanaquastas. Yeah. So isn't that the time that the raccoons came in and he'd draw on to something? Yes. They came in the nature birthday cake.
Starting point is 00:14:49 Well, the mayor, mayor Bicca. Or what are the local people called the raccoons something? Yeah. Yeah, they budgeted. They, they opened up the door. We hadn't secured it enough. And they opened up the door. They pressed it and opened it up,
Starting point is 00:15:02 went in and ate my birthday cake. It's like a little blue. And they got inside, they were able to get into the mini fridge and get the nuts. I think Jeff went, said, I'm going for a smoke break and then ran in and drank all the booze. We called them, we called the front desk.
Starting point is 00:15:17 And they were like, we can't even tell you how much money we've lost in everything that's been taken from rooms, food wise from the minibars because it was not the first time they tried to warn us and we got there and we were kind of like yeah yeah raccoons yeah that son is a bitch yeah they waited until we left to go to dinner because they're fucking smart animals they're really smart animals and then you got dumb shits around man I don't know dumb shits some of them have saved these raccoons and they just can't put them back in the wild because they're so used to humans. But I see these videos all the time of these people that get, you know, baby raccoons and then
Starting point is 00:15:51 they're running around the house. Some guy had the raccoon that he had found out on the street and he was like documenting the growth of this raccoon. Well, by the end of the one year, the raccoon had torn up all the fucking house. I had no drywall because the raccoon was just like getting in the drywall and you couldn't find him. He was in the air conditioning unit. He was in the refrigerator. Yeah. Those raccoons, they're squirrely motherfuckers. Yeah, they are. It's, I think blue is like a raccoon.
Starting point is 00:16:17 It's like a reincarnated raccoon. It's what I think blue is. It's a raccoon in my life. A loud reincarnated raccoon. I wanted to ask you a question. This's a raccoon. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue.
Starting point is 00:16:29 I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue.
Starting point is 00:16:37 I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm blue. I'm, like, I only have one male cousin.
Starting point is 00:16:45 Oh, you only have one? Is he a good looking guy? He's a good looking guy, you sure? Are you, would you? No. I'm not saying would you fuck him? No. Have you ever found him attractive?
Starting point is 00:16:55 No. Of course not, because he's your cousin, right? It kind of like automatically, like there's this little shield in your brain. There's a little brain, yeah, click. But if you had a super hot cousin. No. I think this had a super hot cousin. Now. I think this is a pretty straightforward question
Starting point is 00:17:09 to answer for most people, but what we learned years ago, Chrissy, or maybe in season number two, so years ago, yeah. What we learned is that like, what was it? Like 37%. I wanna say 37. I'm just, I don't have the paperwork in front of me. I never have the paperwork in front of me.
Starting point is 00:17:25 What am I talking about? I'm just making this up. Let's say there's some percentage of the world that is actually married or has children with their first. Cousin, it's a large portion of society. Well, that used to happen a lot more, especially with the aerosocracy. The royalties, yeah, aerosocracy.
Starting point is 00:17:42 Yes, look at those people over there in England. That's the most dramatic thing happening in England. This is the fucking royalty. Yeah. It's it's not an uncommon practice. It's uncommon here in the United States because you never hear about it. No, I'm sure it happens all the fucking time because you're taking a big chance with genetics on crossing and having children that just not mention it's just one of those things that seems weird to me. But I know this happens. I know what happens all the time. I know there's a lot of states.
Starting point is 00:18:12 Most states have no law against marrying your first cousin or procreating with your first cousin. There's no law on the books, probably because most reasonable people think they don't need a law on the books, because most of us have this little curtain that goes down as soon as we see a cousin now I will say this I will say this I do have a really attractive cousin and when I was a kid I don't I don't think I would have like you know First of all, she was eight years older than I was right, so I think that was kids Yeah, that was part of the allure. No, I'm talking like 13 14 years old. I was. Right. So I think that was kids. Yeah, that was part of the allure. No, I'm talking like 13, 14 years old. I was like, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, it's cousin Debbie. Oh, yeah. But when I was a kid, I don't know of your parents did this, my parents did this. When I was a kid, I used to have cousins quote unquote, which
Starting point is 00:19:02 were really just friends that for some reason my parents decided to can totally confuse the shit out of us and call us cousins like Uncle Brian. Yeah, like Uncle Brian. Exactly. I didn't think about that. Everybody in my circle of friends calls me Uncle Brian. I've requested using the shit out of all of the kids. For years, I thought it was cute. Then somewhere around Harvey Weinstein, I decided it wasn't. Sometimes in the Harvey Weinstein timeline, I was like, Uncle Brian doesn't sound so good. But we had these cousins, quote unquote, we went to a place,
Starting point is 00:19:41 I don't know, I'm probably, I remember it, so I'm at least seven or eight years old, nine or 10 years old, and you know how you get into that. Oh, kiss me, you know, you know, smoochy thing, you're just y'alling and you don't know what you're doing, but you see, adults doing it, you think you should be doing it.
Starting point is 00:19:55 And so me and this quote unquote, cousin or this cousin and I got caught kissing. Kissing. Behind this cabin we were staying at. And then we were literal kissing were staying at you literal kissing cousins We were literal kissing cousins mom straggd us into our room gave us a whole speech can't kiss your cousins Really cousins or was this no we weren't even pretend to cousins Well, that's kind of huh listen to this why did they I mean why are they so much information for the come even the commercial break?
Starting point is 00:20:22 God, but the guy, the man and my uncle, quote unquote, was married to this woman, but my uncle had asked my mom to marry him before my dad asked my mom to marry him. And my mom said no to the first guy and yes to the dad, right? So, and it'll lucky me, I'm here, but at the same time, it was me, I'm here, but at the same time, I didn't realize these dynamics when I was young, but as I got older, and
Starting point is 00:20:50 my mom started telling these stories, I was like, no one understands adults when you're young. No, you have no idea what's going on. Go behind the curtain. And that's a good thing. It is a good thing. It's like that little shield with the cousin that comes down. It's a little shield in your mini little brain that keeps you from all of the real drama that's going on. And it's a lot. Yeah. Oh, yes. I'd only spilled over every once in a while
Starting point is 00:21:12 when my mom was like throwing the phone across the room because my aunt was pissing her off or something. I'd be like, whoa, hey, I don't know what it's all about, but it sounds serious. So that is as close as I've ever come to any kind of physical, romantic interaction with anybody that's that I would even pretend to call a cousin, second cousin, third cousin, fourth cousin. I mean, I think once you get down to like third cousin, I get it.
Starting point is 00:21:35 We're probably cousins seven, seven times removed. Maybe. But there is this couple. Seven times removed. What is the removed part mean? I have no idea. You know what you say? Like a cousin once removed or a second, you know, I don't know, a cousin's cousin or an uncle's cousin. Please look at that. Trust me, I have and there's no end to that debate
Starting point is 00:21:58 about what that means. Because it's so confused. It could mean like, you're not actually blood related for your cousins. That what the removed part means. What is seven times, I don't know. I don't know. I guess that means seven generations.
Starting point is 00:22:12 We'll look into it or you can tell us. Send us a text message, let us know. I say all of this to say that there is one couple that keeps showing up on the internet, claiming their first cousins. And I think they are claiming their first cousins, and I think they are. Claiming their first cousins, and these people are thirsty. And I mean thirsty for a television show
Starting point is 00:22:31 because they are all over the fucking internet, morning shows, everything. If you listen, they'll tell you how in love they are with each other, how much sex they have with each other, and how cousin-y they are together, how blood-related they are. Fabulous. They have no qualms about this.
Starting point is 00:22:46 And like I said, I think in their heads and their little pea brains, they're hoping to get a television show out of this. I don't think anyone's ever bit, right? So they keep on putting themselves out there. I think even for TLC, this is a little too much. You know what I'm saying? No, if matter.
Starting point is 00:23:01 And then come on, do you have something? I don't know. I think Mill's got it to show. Yeah, give these guys a show, or don't. No one cares, but I found a documentary type video on these two, and I just have to show you this. Okay. This is out of control, disgusting, and I'm not afraid at all to say I'm against cousin fucking.
Starting point is 00:23:26 TLC just texted me. Oh TLC just texted me. They said it's time to put those cousin fuckers. So you wanna see some fucking cousins? Let's see some fucking cousins. Okay, here we go. G-Z-B. Hey everybody out there in the podcast universe, it's time for the dreaded commercial break
Starting point is 00:23:48 inside the commercial break. It's season number four, you've heard it all before, so let's get to it quickly. You can text us or leave us a voicemail at 1-855-TCB-8383. Questions, comments, concerns or content ideas, send them to 855-TCB-8383 toll free from anywhere in the world. Visit our website, tcbpodcast.com to listen to any of the audio, watch any of the video, or send us a message, hit the contact us button, Instagram and TikTok at the commercial break. And now YouTube videos the same day they air on the audio feed, they'll air youtube.com slash the commercial break.
Starting point is 00:24:24 Chrissy and I are very grateful every time you choose to listen to the commercial break. If you're ever in the market for our sponsors, products, or services, all we ask is that you use the specialized URL's or codes. Thanks again for being part of the TCB family. Now let's hear from those sponsors and we'll be back to this episode of the commercial break. to this episode of The Commercial Break. G-Z-B. We were introduced to these people, by the way, back in season two.
Starting point is 00:24:51 Yeah, the guy is a good looking guy at first glance. At first glance. And the white pants with the shirt. Yeah, can I say something? So go to youtube.com slash the commercial break. If you want to see this, what we're seeing right now. And Morgan, I'm going to talk to share it. Can I say something? So go to youtube.com slash the commercial break, if you wanna see this, what we're seeing right now. And Morgan, I'm gonna talk to you directly. I wish that you put this large so that they can see this.
Starting point is 00:25:12 When you're the entirety of the shape of your penis is discipleable, the second that you sit down, your penis are too tight. It is. And I'm sorry to notice, but I notice things like that. I'm like, the first thing I look at on the guy is dick. And it was, Maybe that was my animal instinct too, just saying,
Starting point is 00:25:33 he's a good looking guy. He's a good looking guy. And then you look at his dick and you're like, well, it's average. He's not bad, he's got the bad, he's packing, he's packing heat. But anybody's packing heat when your pants are that tight, literally choking off the blood supply, making it look bigger.
Starting point is 00:25:50 That was Ron Jeremy's secret. It's also what people do to where they're men do with their shirts, with their arms. They're small. They're too small. That's right. I'm not afraid of a skinny gene, but don't make them this skinny, bro. If you can see the head of my penis through my jeans, then you wouldn't be able to this skinny, bro. If you can see the head of my penis through my genes,
Starting point is 00:26:06 then you wouldn't be able to have micro-penis. But if you can see the head of my penis through the genes, genes. This is not, he's not wearing yoga pants, he's wearing jeans. Yeah, it's genes. Then I say, leave those genes at a, for a, for a, Well, first of all, white genes on a man, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:26:20 Yeah, I don't know about that. I tend to stick to real familiar colors. Blue, black, white, that's it. As far as shirts are concerned, and then slacks, gray, black, blue, that's it. That's what I go with. Anyway, now that we've had a whole conversation about this, let's take a listen to these f**k cousin f**kers.
Starting point is 00:26:39 I was trolling on the internet. As you do. As I do like to do. And I found some cousin f**kers. We've known each other all our lives. We've been each other's first crushes, first kisses. And we happen to be first cousins. Wait, hold on.
Starting point is 00:26:55 This is information that's new. They didn't tell us this last time. First kisses, first love. First crushes, first loves, first kisses. Well, now that I can see as being a reasonable thing that happens to some people, you get in like a family event like Christmas time and you bone your cousin.
Starting point is 00:27:15 That happens. It happens. Listen, we all make mistakes every once in a while. The old under the sleeping bag, the cup. Yeah, the sleeping bag, you slip one in there real quick. Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha sleeping bag. You're a slip one in there real quick. Ha ha ha.
Starting point is 00:27:27 Can I go to second base? You know, that kind of thing. Always consensual, always consensual. But if you're gonna fuck a cousin, fuck a cousin drunk at a family reunion and then never speak to her again. Yes, that's right. And we happen to be first cousins.
Starting point is 00:27:45 Angie's father and Michael's mother are brother and sister. Oh. That makes their relationship illegal in the state of Utah. Okay, hold on. What is going on here? Wait and hold on about Utah.
Starting point is 00:28:00 Oh yeah. Oh, don't wait. Utah, dear Utah. You're going to decide to be picky then with the cousins. This is the, because everything else is allowed, as I tell my wife often, I'm not going to die on this hill. Like, when we get to an argue and sometimes I'm just like, you know what, babe, you're right.
Starting point is 00:28:22 I'm not going to die on this hill. It's just not going to happen. So Utah, you're going to die on the first cousins hill. That's what you're going to die on this hill. It's just not gonna happen. So Utah, you're gonna die on the first cousin's hill? That's what you're gonna die on? That's where they hold their moral ground. Well, to be completely fair about this, it is illegal. Polygamy is illegal in Utah. It is not legal.
Starting point is 00:28:36 They just choose to look away for most of them. Yeah, that's good. Yeah, by the Salt Lake City, it's like that's not something they think is cool. No, that's true. I know. Most mainstream Mormons don't, it's like, that's not something they think is cool. It's not like city. I know. Most mainstream Mormons don't think it's cool. Yeah. Best show.
Starting point is 00:28:49 But what I want to know is why are they filming a porn movie and their kitchen? They really are. What's going on, which you can't see if you're listening to it, is they're showing them in the kitchen and they're literally fondling each other. Like, he's grabbing her boobs and sticking his tongue down her throat and I don't know why they're showing this. I don't know why they're showing this. I don't know either. I guess this is the way you prove we are actually doing this.
Starting point is 00:29:10 It's not a joke. Ah. Their strong connection began when they were just kids. They're like second grade, like 70. Well, one night at a family reunion, we got in the same sleeping bag and she said, put it in. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:29:24 It's old. And we immediately clicked and we're like best friends We were slow dancing in the closet got caught kissing. I got pulled aside by my parents And they said what's going on and my mom said cool at Angie and we felt like from then on We were kind of kept apart for dead love. Yeah for bed and love Romeo and... Or something to that. Romeo's cousin.
Starting point is 00:29:48 First of all, second of all, every other shot in this particular video, and we're only 16 seconds in, has been them literally, graphically touching each other and sticking their tongues down each other's throat. I think they feel like they have something to prove. I think there's a lot of people that say, you're not really first cousins, you're just doing this for a television show. And the more that I see them,
Starting point is 00:30:11 graphically making out in front of the camera, the more I think they're just doing this for a television show. Because I don't know any married couple that acts like this to you. That's true. Yeah. No, once you can marry all the romance is over. You've got to pay bills and shit. It felt unfair.
Starting point is 00:30:24 It felt a little bit like Romeo and Juliet, except instead of these warring families, it's the same family. After years of the family keeping them apart, Michael and Angie are now both divorced, but were recently reunited and learned the old sparks was still there. Nine months ago, we saw each other
Starting point is 00:30:43 for the first time in 10 years, and just fireworks. It felt like we've picked up where we left off. Amiru was like, she's still super. It was Amiru, I get the penis pump out. This guy is such a charge. He's such a charge. All right.
Starting point is 00:30:59 I had a sex stream about Michael after that. And I wanted to tell him about it, but I was so nervous that he didn't feel the same way. No doubt about how Michael feels. God damn, do we have to be that graphic? What is this? Who made this? We TV.
Starting point is 00:31:16 What does we TV have on there? Is it like- Women's entertainment. Little people of city of Atlanta or something? Little women of Atlanta? I saw that. High class entertainment. Reunited once more, the canoe-deling cousins then have the dilemma of how to tell the family.
Starting point is 00:31:32 The infamous Polaroid. So, they posted this photo on the family Facebook page. Oh! That's a fuck-up! That's so fucked up. The family Facebook page. Mom, dad, I'm fucking your brother's daughter, yay! That's a fuck top. That's so fucked up. Family Facebook, baby. Mom, dad, I'm fucking your brother's daughter. And that's what.
Starting point is 00:31:49 Yay. Yay. We have an announcement. Uncle Don and Aunt Angie, you're also my parents. Dear. Mom and dad, slash aunt and uncle. Okay, kids, I know Aunt Debbie was here last year with her husband, but this year she's my wife So now you're you've gone from cousins to
Starting point is 00:32:14 brother and sister cousins Once removed once removed You are brother cousins no times removed You are brother cousins, no times removed. Now kids, I'm gonna go ahead and post a picture to your Facebook page for the school. It just let everybody know where together. Yep, that's Daddy's penis right inside your mommy. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:32:35 Why do you have to post that particular picture? They have kids. They have kids. I don't know if I'm trying to. They're divorced. I don't know. But they posted the most graphic picture of them. I know.
Starting point is 00:32:46 If I were them, you remember how we were all upset that the one family wouldn't tell the kids who's dead? They were. They look great now. Yeah, those people, I have no qualms on them anymore. Everything's gravy.
Starting point is 00:32:58 And I think these people should adopt the same policy. We don't know who your parents are, you're out to ver adoption. It's awful. Even no question, they were way into each other. We got kicked off the family group page. They were shi- cannot understand why. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:17 I cannot understand why. Look, there's your cousin. Huh? What is that? Oh, that's a penis in your cousin. Oh, for God's sake, you're out of the group. You can horrify. Horrify. We took some more polaroids that we didn't ever show them to any good news.
Starting point is 00:33:40 Oh, I was gonna say I thought they posted those. But what they took, they took new polaroids. New polaroids for themselves, I guess. and they are now showing them to we TV. Perfect. Let's get it together, guys. Perfect. You guys, you are so thirsty for a television show, so thirsty that it's obvious. Why are you showing all this to the world?
Starting point is 00:34:01 You don't need to show all this to the world. Couldn't they just be on camera talking about the relationship? Or couldn't they just have the relationship and that's that? That's right. Astor and I only post our nude photographs on the closed Instagram group. That's right. Which by the way, you can now find on Patreon for $5 a month. Get to know your commercial break host just a little bit more.
Starting point is 00:34:22 There's Brian's DD Cantor. Carlson Kathy has become the nemesis. It's just gross. People joke around that our family are a bunch of yee-ha in breads. And it's not just the cutting family insults that these joke. I don't think that's true. Okay, you kinda hard. Yeah, but if there's one person in the family that's going to be upset about this, it looks like Kathy is going to be the lady.
Starting point is 00:34:46 Kathy, yeah, cousin Kathy. Anybody who's got a cheek piercing, it's going to look bone to pick with somebody. You know what I'm saying? Us cousins have to contend with. Oh, we have 25 new messages. Here's someone who said, what is wrong with you two? Do you think it's normal to marry a person who has the same blood and genetics as you do? One is that ever right. I think the law should never be changed for this to
Starting point is 00:35:08 become legal. Never! Yuck! That's called incest. What's next, your pet? People that hurt other people are hurt themselves. I try to forgive them and move on. Well thanks, Dr. Wayne Dyer. I know. I got it. You've gone at least five seconds without sticking your dick down your wife's throat. Do you think it's time? It takes a pull or it's put them up on Facebook. This is a normal reaction, guys. We are not taught, at least I wasn't taught,
Starting point is 00:35:32 to breed with my cousin, because first of all, there can be medical problems. That's a well-known fact. I think sometimes it's drama ties to, for effect, but that is when you... Please get out there and see the other 17 year family. No, no dating's hard right now. God, bro. With those tight jeans, you should be able to walk into any Johnny's hideaway anywhere.
Starting point is 00:35:57 Fix somebody up. I mean, if Marlon can get an 88 year old girlfriend, you can find someone close to your age. In with the whole family and the online world against them, nothing was going to stop these copulating cousins from taking their love to the next level, like getting married. You know what I think? I think they're either looking for a television show and or they have an only fans page. Is my guess? Because they probably fetishize this Do you think I bet?
Starting point is 00:36:29 There's all that step brother stepsister porn most popular porn most popular porn out there is brother stepbrother stepsister But it really does I have probably cousin porn I am more accepting of of step brother porn than I am of cousin porn. But in it, he does have tried to erase misconceptions that polygamy is legal in their state. Since it's not legal in Utah to marry your first cousin, we had to drive to the next state. We could do that, which is Colorado. There we go. We tied the night. We tied the night. The night is time. Back home in Utah, just by having sex, these
Starting point is 00:37:11 first cousins could risk a five-year jail sentence. Never the last. Well, so let's put more new photographs on Facebook. Nevertheless, let's post it everywhere. Everywhere. In graphic detail. And then let's make a wee show about it. It's, what? They're hoping to complete their love story by starting a family of their own. Angie and I have discussed having children a lot and I would love to have a child with Angie. Okay, so they didn't previously have children
Starting point is 00:37:42 with their other spouses, which is good. Thank God. Good news. Thank God. So far, you're not going to ruin it. You're going to fuck those children up, man. You're going to fuck those children up. I've been to therapy for like 10 years, and I don't have the,
Starting point is 00:37:55 I don't have the most normal family in the world. We all have our stories, right? Yes. But I also don't have cousins for, for parents. Yeah, that's a whole new ranch. Oh, are you kidding me? We found out that we were pregnant. Oh, she's pregnant.
Starting point is 00:38:10 What's up? Yeah, she's pregnant. We went to our doctor's first ultrasound appointment. And the doctor was looking around and he said he couldn't find a heartbeat. We've been kind of lost since then. Having the promise of a baby gave us more purpose, gave us more... I don't care who you are, that's tough.
Starting point is 00:38:34 I don't care who you are. Yeah. Really? Yeah. I don't know. Or the laugh, the baby just had a little memorial thing to her, the baby. Yeah. How old was the baby? thing to her, the baby. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:45 How old was the baby? Two weeks old? Not there. Yeah. We came to her because you're not pregnant. Yeah. It's all of your hair. All for war.
Starting point is 00:38:54 Yeah. We miss you. We won't forget you. I think you're allowed to bury the baby that... No, they wouldn't allow you to take it. There's no baby to take home at two weeks or three weeks old. That's when you have the first ultrasound is like a month old. A month's in the pregnancy.
Starting point is 00:39:15 If you know that early, right? A month or six weeks, eight weeks, whatever it is. There would be nothing to bury. But they're doing something. They've buried something. Well, they're grief. Maybe it's one of those polaroids. Had to endure for a day. We miss you. We'll never forget you.
Starting point is 00:39:34 Theism about the biological consequences of first cousins having a baby together. They think that reproducing with your cousin will automatically cause genetic defects. To address fears, they've undergone blood tests to see if a potential baby is at any genetic risk. They're about to discover the results. On camera.
Starting point is 00:39:58 On camera for we. Yeah, on camera for we. I think more than being cousins, this is endemic of what's going on in society as a whole. Everybody wants to be famous, every fucking asshole with some kind of twist in their story or opinion, oh, that's me. Okay, back to the show.
Starting point is 00:40:19 I was gonna say, everybody wants to have a podcast. Everybody wants a podcast, cousin fuckers, the new podcast from the commercial break I put these to a podcast I'd bring in other cousins and see if they got attracted to I throw an extra cousin in there. I'd bring out a little Kathy over This is far too close. I'd be jealous Yeah, Kathy might have wanted to have yeah, well, he shows it right there is Jean So you know, is it not we to have that. Well, he shows it right there as G and so.
Starting point is 00:40:45 You know, whether or not we can have a child, a healthy child. She's not, you're a true woman. Moment of truth, here we go. Wait, how do they know that? They just tell that the DNA sequencing is gonna be okay. I assume. Yeah, it's a kind of blood test.
Starting point is 00:41:03 Yeah, which doctor is authorizing this? Yeah, sure no problem. Find out of YouTube. Goons going to have children. These blood tests will help guide that decision. They are so into themselves. They think this is the coolest thing since sliced bread. This isn't a family picture. This is a picture of her picture of him separately looking off into the distance. Yes. Since Jerry Lee Lewis saying, great balls of fire, no cousins have been more famous for getting for fucking.
Starting point is 00:41:33 You know what I'm saying? And so they are looking to milk it for everything that it's worth. And that's my impression of this culture. Sure. Could it mean having to put an end to their baby plans for good and were their critics right after all? Okay, look at this. We're good!
Starting point is 00:41:51 Let's get the fucking... I just came in, yeah? Some more of my cousin jizz right there. Cousin jizz. Mine just says one thing, cystic fibrosis. Just a little cystic fibrosis. What does your say? They showed a picture of it saying that.
Starting point is 00:42:20 It says on negative for everything. Negative, negative, negative. They test for 274 different possible chromosome deficiencies that could arise. If you have a chromosome problem, they do this also with mother's blood during pregnancy. And they can tell if you're going to have major problems, from Down syndrome to Crohn's disease, they can tell all this stuff with a certain degree, like, you know, 97% accuracy. And so I think what they're doing is they're just taking this like chromosome test to see if they have any deficiencies, but that doesn't
Starting point is 00:42:53 really tell you whether or not the two of you having sex together is going to create any problems. I don't think anyway. We don't know enough about that. I think they're doing ancestry.com and they they're doing, like, I think they're just getting their ancestry.com reports. Yep, we're cousins. I don't have anything wrong with it. You know, they said most people have like a handful
Starting point is 00:43:18 of something, but I don't have anything. I'm perfect. I'm perfect. You see my dick? Let me show you to my jeans. We're going to head to my penis. Perfect'm perfect. You see my dick? Hey, let me show you to my jeans. Look at the head of my penis. Perfectly circular. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:29 There must be something wrong with me. You know, most people, they're like, you know. They're the most people, but not me. Most people come up with like 27 different deficiencies. Not me, perfectly strong, perfectly. I can fuck any cousin I want to, basically. Well, now that I've figured this out, I don't need to fuck my cousin anymore. I'm out of here. Yeah, I don't know. This is just about their own. This is about their own disease.
Starting point is 00:43:49 This has nothing to do. This is so misleading. This has nothing to do with whether or not the two of you have sex of something's gonna happen. I'm nothing. Tins. Well, accordingly this. But you know what that means, right? It means it doesn't matter what I have. I'm not a carry for anything. So you could be a carry for a hundred things, it wouldn't even matter. No, that does matter. Yeah, that does matter.
Starting point is 00:44:11 Which science class did you take, bro? That's so weird. You're just gonna cancel me out? Yeah, okay, it's a lot of things. Okay, it's all that, everything. You've got a hundred things wrong with you, but I've got nothing. One plus a negative hundred is 100% positive. We're not getting anything wrong with you, but I've got nothing. One plus a negative hundred is 100% positive.
Starting point is 00:44:26 We're not getting anything wrong with our children. Unless of course it has two heads, then there's a problem. What do you with that? What cost of average do we come to? I'm best to perfect. I'm just so happy right now. I can't believe it. We need to have children because these are gonna be like
Starting point is 00:44:50 Perfect like super baby genetically perfect children. Wow. These kids are so high on their own supply I think they've been divvied dabbing their way through life How much cocaine do you think they use on a regular basis because because this is I'm not even this optimistic on the commercial break These two are just so optimistic Having a kid is a scary, serious, highly involved thing. And even in 2023, under the best of circumstances, things go wrong. It's just a really risky, it's really risky.
Starting point is 00:45:19 Always has been. I'm my mind is like, it's below. It's below. Yeah. Ta-da-da-da-da-da-da. What the. Yeah. So it's good started. Bam. Nearly in power. How can we show this girl having her tits grabbed like that?
Starting point is 00:45:35 How is that possible? When did we turn into semi-porn? All of a sudden we as like cinematics after dark. It's unbelievable. By the results, Angie and Michael have even more reason to change the law and live in a state where their marriage and incest is allowed. They've already set up an online petition gaining me Oh my god So they've actually taken this
Starting point is 00:46:12 Distorted a petition That says allow me to marry my cousin I got 1500 supporters Allow me to fuck my bird. Oh my gosh. I don't know. I thought this was a GoFundMe too first. This is a GoFundMe.
Starting point is 00:46:35 I lose my shit. So there's, I love how they have a whopping 1500 people that signed out of 2000. And only 261 in Utah so you know the rest are Russian bots. Oh, yeah, that's it. Russian bots are like, this is where all the action will happen. Ground zero for our titanic net operation. Cousin fuckers. Thousand signatures.
Starting point is 00:47:05 Hope to get more support from the public in their local park. How do you feel about first cousins being married in the state of Utah? They need as many signatures as they can get. Oh, yeah, that's a fun part. Well, um, can I fuck her first before I make a decision? Yeah. Um, can I fuck her first before I make a decision? Yeah, I mean, yeah, well sure right? I mean, if I'm gonna, if I'm gonna allow this, I might as well see what we're working with. I can already see your penis, so I know that's great.
Starting point is 00:47:39 For, you have any nude polaroids laying around? Yeah, what you can't see is that the woman, she has an Angie, I guess it's her name, she's got like a visor and a clipboard and roller skates. Oh, and skate. She's wearing roller skates. Okay. Yeah, they're at this local park and they've got to sign up. And drop me in support.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Allow us to marry each other. We're first cousins. Kids, go to the car. If I'm not back in 15 minutes, down on one one. I'm going to go talk to these two cousin fuckers. At to be able to take this petition to the state Senate, so the law can be repealed. Morning, I would say probably not. Okay. Why not? You're messing with the DNA. Are you interested in signing our petition to change the law to allow first cousins?
Starting point is 00:48:28 You want to allow that? Why not? Yes. Do you have an argument against it? But what are you even doing this? Why don't you just move to fucking Colorado? We're illegal. It's legal in like 40 states and you're living in one of the 10 that doesn't allow it You're just looking for trouble. You are just looking for your 15 minutes of fame. No one. I promise you no one who has this kind of fetish or Weirdness or oddness goes out in the public park and starts asking people. Hey, you mind if I fuck killer whales What give me an argument against it. Well, it's a whale and it's got a big vagina and I'm not going to do any damage. I know, but they're going extinct.
Starting point is 00:49:14 That's why we got to start fucking. But you can die. It's my life, my body, my body, my choice. Wouldn't you die for your love? That's all I gotta say. The luck begins to change. Would you like to go ahead and sign our petition? With their first sympathetic pass-by. Thank you so much for doing this. Yeah, I'm Mary, my first cousin years ago. Here, yes, you have a wonderful. Here, here's our brand new baby. Ah!
Starting point is 00:49:47 Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! He's got floppy ears. Don't worry about it. It's all good. Hey, our first signature.
Starting point is 00:49:58 And now we're trying to change the law in Utah so that we're not outlaws here. Right. Sweet. Sweet. You got this fun. There's like 313 year old boys standing in front of them with backpacks from school. We're trying to change a lot. Then they kiss each other with tongue
Starting point is 00:50:11 and the 13 year old boys are probably like, cool, you got like a video we can watch or something. We can. You guys on a porn hub? You guys got a twitch, were you a fucker or something? I don't know. The guy is so gross. So gross. He's so gross, he's just l don't know. The guy is so gross. So gross.
Starting point is 00:50:25 He's so gross, he's just licking her mouth. He just licks her tongue, yeah. That's not the right way to kiss. And if it is, I've been kissing the wrong way the entire time. Which is a good thing. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if I'm known for my kissing skills, but I know I'm not known for my kissing skills. So there you go.
Starting point is 00:50:40 I guess I'm doing something, right? You're not known for bad, because I'm... I'm not known for bad kissing skills. At least I don't think I know there's a whole reddit page with my ex girlfriends. Michael there, Rastu. Thank you. If they choose to prosecute, we could be in prison for up to five years.
Starting point is 00:50:59 Yeah, I think it proved that we've had sex there would. Well, the polaroid is fucking, gee. This fucking Christ, Bob. Can I talk to you for a second? Can you, I have a conversation? Because I'm sure you're watching. When you put yourself out there like this, you are asking to be scrutinized. Why don't you just quietly move to another state?
Starting point is 00:51:18 I can tell you, Bob. And continue fucking. Why do you have to tell everybody that would listen to your cousins and your fucking? I'm over it. Like, you guys, okay, you love each other, find whatever cool, not something I would ever tell my children would be okay to do.
Starting point is 00:51:33 Not an ever something that I would myself think about doing, but I accept the fact that you have the right to live how you want to live as long as you're not hurting anybody else. I just ask you. I ask you. I asked for possibly your children. That's right, probably stay away from the children thing. Okay, let's just pretend like we both have 400 diseases that could go
Starting point is 00:51:48 But going out into the middle of a public park and asking 13 year old boys if it's okay that we go ahead and have sex in the state of Utah Because we're first cousins is the most ridiculous thing is the most ridiculous way to call attention to your To this whole thing that's going on in his movement. Yeah movement all attention to your, to this whole thing that's going on. In his movement. Yeah, movement. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, What color would it be? Black? Yes. Black ribbon. Join the FCS, the free the cousin fuckers movement. FCS, FCS. First of all, second of all, if you're gonna do this kind of political work and you don't want to get arrested beforehand,
Starting point is 00:52:39 stop putting nude polaroids up yourself out online. Or on TV shows. Oh. Yeah, even that is illegal and you're t-t-t-t-t. Thank you. Projector Simon's petition. Suddenly, the tide is turning for these two.
Starting point is 00:52:53 Suddenly, everybody's lost their mind. It's joining them, yeah. Oh, I've always wanted to fuck my cousin. That's illegal. Yeah, that's illegal. What? I've been doing it for years. I've been sex with all my cousins Just have to have their sign this we are one of our family in the unions. It's just dedicated to fucking each other Decks prove dextra I thought it was a female As long as you're happy. That's all that matters
Starting point is 00:53:22 And then someone really manages to make their day. Yeah. Come on, it was my grandmother and my grandpa. Okay. Yeah. I mean, it turned out great. People were happy. Yeah, you turned out great.
Starting point is 00:53:36 You've got jail tattoos everywhere. This guy walks up shirtless. He's got the tear running down his face, which is the jail thing that I murdered somebody, right? Now, making an assumption, I have no idea. But, you know, because your grandmother and your grandfather did it, it was a different time back then.
Starting point is 00:53:53 Back in the early, like, late 1800s, early 1900s, it was a totally different time. And you couldn't get on the internet and you didn't have Tinder and Eharmonie didn't exist. And you lived where only your cousins lived. Yeah, and you probably never left your town. That's right, ever in your life. Because there were no arrow planes.
Starting point is 00:54:10 It's unbelievable. Happy? So don't pull. Thank you. Oh, sorry. We found someone whose grandparents were first cousins. Right. These crusading cousins are on college.
Starting point is 00:54:23 What does? Mission accomplished. Mission accomplished. Got another three signatures. What does? Mission accomplished. Got another three signatures. Only got spit on twice. And we met another cousin, fucker. All right, we have plenty more to talk about. We'll do a part two.
Starting point is 00:54:36 I promise, everyone settle down. I know you like the cousin, fucker stuff. You dirty, dirty nasty people out there. I'm going to see if I can find some of their porn videos too. I'll take a look at that I'll review. I like you research that If you could only see my browser history, it's a total hot mess Listen TZ me podcast that car. I just can't stop laughing
Starting point is 00:55:04 The movement? The FCF. Free the cousin fuckers. Free the fucking cousin fuckers. FFCF. Free those fucking cousin fuckers. Alright, listen, tcbpodcast.com is where you go. You can listen to all the audio.
Starting point is 00:55:20 You can watch all the video. And most importantly, you can contact us. If you'd like your free 21 EPM sticker, 21 Ejaculations part month, the commercial break is showing it's support for prostate health and cousin, Bukers all around the world. Doesn't matter how you get those EPMs,
Starting point is 00:55:36 just get 20 month of a day. You got to fuck your cousin under the guise of 21 EPMs, then. We're gonna have another Snicker next month that's gonna be FFCF, right in down. The next Snicker is FFCF. Are the ribbon. Oh yeah, FFCF. Oh yeah, we'll do like little buttons. You can wear it to school. No one will know what it means. Right. 855-TCB-8383-1855-TCB-8383-Toll-Free. From anywhere in the world, we'll pick up the charges. Please write us.
Starting point is 00:56:04 Contact us if you have comments, questions, concerns, or content ideas. We love them all. We're taking them at the phone line. Even if you're a Russian troll. Even if you're a Russian troll. Come on, bring it on. Give me your best shot.
Starting point is 00:56:18 On your best day. Your, I don't even know what it's gonna say there. Fuck it. Come on, my controls. Yeah, on your best day on your best day. I'm smarter than you asleep. I don't even know what that means, but I did stay at a holiday and then in last night. I don't know what I'll have this. And the commercial break on Instagram, youtube.com slash the commercial break where you find full episodes
Starting point is 00:56:43 the same day they air here on the audio feed and take talk at the commercial break where you find full episodes the same day they air here on the audio feed and Tiktok at the commercial break live commercial break live TCB live on Tiktok You're gonna be so excited to see our four posts there But I promise I'm trending we're trending oh So I guess that's all I can do for today. I think so. Chrissy, I love you. I love you. Best of you. I'm best of you.
Starting point is 00:57:07 And best of you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I always say we do say, and we must say goodbye. Goodbye. I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a singer

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