The Commercial Break - Frankie's Follicles

Episode Date: July 3, 2023

The follicles have spoken, and they do NOT want to be put back on Frankie's head! Somebody help them! AAAAAAALIEEEEEEENS Dirty Phil from ITV! TCB Minus  Baby Dante Tickle my taint sir! All the pervs in hollywood and the news Frankie B on hair transplants Who’s wearing baseball cap to fancy places? mAN, he’s got a full head of hair! A former girlfriend gave him a complex Billboards…they work! Step by step A lengthy process…two whole days Did this follicle live? Only the professionals know… There's a whole lot of novocaine here Aaaaaand it takes a year to get your hair to grow in LINKS: Send us show ideas, comments, questions or concerns by texting us or leaving a voicemail at: 1.855.TCB.8383 Speak to TCB LIVE by calling 775.TCB.LIVE (1.775.822.5483) Tuesday-Thursday 12pm-5pm EST Watch TCB on YouTube Creator: Bryan Green Co-Host: Bryan Green Co-Host: Krissy Hoadley Written By: Bryan Green Exec Producers: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Content Production & Research: Tina Khano YouTube Producer & Editor: Morgan Please Audio Editing: Christina A. Executive Director: Astrid B. Associate Producer: Gustavo Episodic Contribution: Marianne, Diane, Natalie, Will The Champ, Will D** Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I am in a very good mood this morning because I'm doing my favorite thing, looking at pictures of myself. On this episode of the commercial break. Hi, it's me, Frankie Fockel. Hey, dude, what happened to my head? It was like a test. Frankie Sam! They got me a break as a constant blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Look at my body, this!

Get a free wrist band. I gotta give you a break as a constant blast. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la The next episode of the commercial break starts now. There you go, you sick fucks. Welcome cats and kittens back to the commercial break on Brian Green. This is my dear friend and beautiful co-host, Kristen Joy, only best of you, Chrissy. And as you ride in. Best of you out there in the podcast universe. All you twisted sickos out there with your aliens They call for the aliens. They do we they tell us not to play the aliens then they ask us where the aliens are No, no, I don't get it. You're all of my just kids hoist out there. I don't know what's going on with you But okay, there you go. I've fed you now go away. It's like blue. I gave you a treat now go away

Well actually stay through the commercials and then go away away. Well, actually stay. No, say. Through the commercials. And then go away. I found out more information about our friend Philip at ITV. Remember how? Sir, are you telling me you fathered 1,300 alien babies and have never seen them? You put your human penis in an alienoid vagina, sir? Your sperm of all the people on Earth, sir. You were chosen to father alien children, sir. Yeah, it was like a farmer out in the woods with... Oh, yeah, he couldn't answer any questions.

No, sir. You have no pictures. After having 1,400 sexual encounters within an alien you did not think to bring a camera sir. He always treated it so seriously. Oh I know. Yeah but it was always so torsional. Oh he said you'd have wide eyes.

You'd have his paper in his hand. You'd lean forward. Oh yeah. What do you mean? What do you mean what do you mean sir? What do you mean your six dollars marrying you? I'm gonna miss that guy. I am gonna miss that guy. It's a he's an institution. He really is he's he was like a children Here's the ears the background that I got yeah, and the background if you're just first tuning in sure it's a British Talk show morning show like a morning show. A hard hitting morning.

It's called this morning, right? And it's on ITV. It's called this morning. I want an original name. It's like today. The today's really is today. We're watching it today on the today. So this morning, ITV, Holly and Philip, they've been around forever.

Philip was a, he was a host of a very popular children's program. Oh. And when he was younger, and then he took some time off, and then he came back on ITV. ITV and BBC pretty much, they all, BBC and ITV, if you, like I was just in London, they have, they, they corner like 30 channels on television. Oh, really? It's ITV-1, ITV-12 It's ITV1, ITV12, ITV13, ITV23. It's all in BBC's the same way.

But BBC is publicly funded, but BBC's got some really fucking fantastic programming as does ITV. It's some of the stuff that I watch on my own stream. Like I got a VPN, I'd love to stream into ITV. And one of the, one of the peepep the shows that we found had some really interesting content for breakdown was ITV this morning with Philip and Holly, most of the time, not always,

but most of the time it was Philip and Holly because they do have a couple different versions of the show with different hosts. Philip made a surprise announcement that he was just leaving, he was retiring. And a day later, it came out that many on the staff had suspected for a very long time that Philip had been having an affair with a young male staffer. Uh-oh.

Now, it wasn't but two years ago or three years ago when the pandemic started, I think, I may have my timing off a little bit, but he had been living as a married man and he was gay the entire time. So he made the announcement, he came out live on television to Holly, Holly did the interview, he came out live in like a prime time special and I know like, but I get it, I get it, okay, big deal. You know, the guy we've been watching forever is gay, whatever. Yeah.

Care. But anyway, yeah, come out. His wife chose to stay married to him unbelievably. Um, but I, but I have like this arrangement. I know. I don't have to get dicked down. Yeah. Yeah.

We don't have to pretend your ED has something to do with me. And, uh, you know, it all makes sense now. But I like living with you. You're a cool cat. And we got this nice house and check-split. And you decorated it beautifully. Yes, exactly. Thanks for stereotyping, Ryan.

But it's true. I mean, let's just admit it. Thank you, good taste. They've good taste. And so, I mean, I lived with that gay guy. That one time, I'll tell you what, it was the most beautifully decorated $700 a month apartment. You've ever seen it here in Thailand.

We had antiques and it was just a really classy ass apartment, right? And so Philip has been having this affair with this young man. So the day after he announced his retirement, unsurprisingly, the tabloids come out with this big story. Many in the business and many in the office and many in the studio had already suspected that this was going on. This guy with this kid was brought on as a teenager, like 15 years old as an intern, and he was a family friend of Phillips.

But he claimed he never had anything romantic until many years later when he was in his 20s and all this other stuff. So let's take that a face value. It's a simmering, simmering. It's called office romance. He had a work wife and it got uncovered. Me personally. This sounds like the plot from that Apple TV show, the Morning Show. Isn't that what it's called?

The Morning Show? It sounds exactly like the same plot that Apple TV show, the morning show, isn't that what it is called? Yeah, the morning show? It sounds exactly like the same plot, exactly like it. And many believe that Holly knew and that she may have helped cover up and that, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Whatever's going on, there's a big drama over there because the British, if we think we love our tabloids,

they love their tabloids. Yeah, I mean, that's a reason why Prince Harry is going to court right now. We'll have a full breakdown on that from our friend, Maryanne, that's a reason why Prince Harry is going to court right now. We'll have a full breakdown on that from our friend Mary Ann, Mary Ann, on a future episode. But I know this information is a couple of weeks old. I'll remind you that Chrissy and I are human beings who need a break. So we're taking some vacation this summer and you're getting episodes that have been

recorded a few weeks behind. So I know that this is not breaking news. We heard here last. I TV minus. Yeah. It's TCB minus. Exactly. All your favorite content. So I know that this is not breaking news. We heard here last, ITV minus, CCB minus. Exactly. All your favorite content, somewhere else.

So. Fagnies are fiction. Fagnies are fiction, guaranteed. So Philip, he had to leave because he felt like this was gonna be a big stain on the ITV name. I mean, you had on the guy. I thought they've already done. Yeah.

I mean, you had a guy on that have you already done? Yeah. I mean, you had a guy on that claimed to have 1300 alien children that he visited often. And no alimony. He didn't need to pay any fraternity money, but you know, what happened? They were in Pods. Don't forget. Oh, yeah, they were locked in Pods. Pobby! Pobby!

We figured it would take a lot. It's going to take a lot to send them to college. Yeah, I hope he has that college money there. He's been doing that five, 20, three, whatever. How many cards is that guy gonna have to buy? Well, they turned 16. Yeah, they're all around the same age too. It's just gonna be a big nightmare.

And how do you keep the name straight? I mean, I have four to eight children. I can't keep their name straight. I don't even know the name of my dog. The only reason why I know the name of my dog, the only reason why I get that right every time is because I say it 4,500 times a day. Blue, blue, blue, blue, blue, blue.

My neighbors think I'm crazy. My neighbors must hate me. They just hear me yelling and screaming at me. So, Philip is departed and that's really sad. So, have you telling me you've been sucking the dick of your intons? He also had on one of our favorite pickup artists on there. Oh yeah, and the liar.

Yeah, that's right. When he went from the pickup artist to the polygamist, he came on ITV to tell everybody how happy that's right. Yeah, that's right. He was on there. When he went from the pickup artist to the polygamist, he came on ITV to tell everybody how happy that relationship was, and the two women looked like they'd been kidnapped. They were breath really hot. Yeah, they're both really cute, which, you know, whatever. Whatever, Adam is so full of shit that I'm sure they're in on it. They're just, everybody's doing it for views,

but remember that one of his wife's was pregnant. Yeah, that's what we got baby. That's what we got baby. Was that baby Dante? No, baby Dante was the children who didn't know who their father was. Okay. Wasn't it?

I don't know. You think it was Adam Lier? I think it might've been Adam the liar, yeah. Baby Dante. Ugh. What a terrible name. Goo Goo Gaga. Change my diaper, daddy Adam. Daddy bullshit, pick up orders. What a girl, man. Goo Goo Gaga. Furnkills I don't even know what lacking office, but if I did I do it right now. Oh, I had that. You're supposed to be a big

little boy. You know the people we watch your videos to laugh at you right now. Okay, just check it. I got a new BD boo boo. Change my shitty diaper. Don't you say it in its day? Don't say it. Don't say it out. Don't you soon it's the day, don't you, Sider? Don't you out. So I imagine Philip is a lot like our Ryan secrets. He's just kind of an omnipresent, always there, milk toast kind of guy,

and then he's got a little bit of controversy and he leaves. I understand why companies put this policy in place, but it's a stupid one that you can never fraternize with anybody that works with you, because the second you tell people that, well first of all, they're gonna frat and ice anyway. Yeah, they are. It'll just be secret or not.

Yeah, now what I do understand a little bit in some circumstances, and I guess this is like, circumstances by circumstances, is when someone is like a big deal like Philip is, when he basically runs the network, and then he's fucking an underlings. Yeah, we know what, I know all about it, You know all about that.

I don't know. Yeah. We've seen that in action. And let me tell you, it's ugly. Yeah. Yeah. When someone kind of rolls on you, you know, you get, you get in transparent power.

Person of power. And yeah, the money or whatever it is, you know, fancy trips or luxury cars or whatever they're afforded that you aren't. You get engrossed in that world, and then sure, I'll suck your dick, why not? You know what I'm saying? That's kinda how it works, and it's human nature. It's not like anybody necessarily did anything wrong

unless Philip was saying you suck my dick or you're fired. Right, but I don't get that from Philip, but I don't know, I also... So you better suck my dick. You better all tickle this paint before you get fired, sir. Are you telling me you won't tickle my paint? With your tasty teen tongue? Sir, you will not blow in my asshole with your delicious lips?

Well, sir, you are fired. Yeah, I don't get that from him. I don't get that from him either, but you know, so I don't really see what I'm doing. I didn't see Matt flower coming down the pipe either. I didn't see Matt flower coming down the pipe either. I was rooting for the guy. He was there during 9-11.

He beat up Tom Cruise about the, you know, they went toe-to-toe about Brook Shields and heard Xanax or whatever. I mean, Scientology. Hi. He was at the Winter Olympics and sought like, city ever watching him.

I was like, He was in all the Olympics. Yeah. And he sees on those Olympics forever and ever and ever. He was like, you kind of thought of Matt Lauer was like, he's a cool guy. Yeah. But he was not a cool guy, at all.

And then, you know, there's that Brian Williams, too. He was always there at Brian Williams. And I like Brian Williams. But then he was like a cool guy at all and then you know, there's that Brian Williams too He was always there at Brian Williams and I like Brian Williams But then he was like making up stories about jumping out of a chopper and killing a bunch of you know Isis people. Well a Fagnus or fiction Fagnus or fiction. That's all you said. It's all fiction anyway guys Let's history is written by those who win and that's always going to be the truth and AI is gonna do no better It's something that out. It's already bullshitting everybody. We tried that out a couple of episodes ago.

AI is full of shit also. So I'm really sad to see Philip go, but somebody will take his place. Let's see where he goes though next. Yeah, this will keep a close eye on it. Well, he's in his late 60s, early 70s, I think is what I read. And so maybe that was his last straw. Maybe he doesn't come back.

But if I'm somebody, I'm picking that guy up. Yeah, he's crazy. I'm like, wait, you had a consensual relationship with someone that you worked with and you're never gonna work again. That doesn't make any sense. He's not that fucking shit head. Who's that fucking guy?

Who's the guy? Now I can't remember his name. I can never remember anybody's name So that's not so any surprise the guy who was in Sandy ball. No, not Sandy ball the creepy Actor Kevin Spacey that's who I'm thinking. I Turned out to be a real creep But I always thought he was yeah I never liked Kevin Spayson.

I really liked him. I enjoyed the movies that he was in sometimes. Sometimes I didn't. Yeah. Because I always felt like he was being way over dramatic. Right. And so I didn't, he wasn't selling the character to me. He was just being way too dramatic.

And so there were a couple of notable films that I liked him in. One of them was, what is that one? American. American Beauty was good. Yeah. There was the other Kaiser Socey when he played Kaiser Socey. Oh, that's really the one where I really liked it. Usually I like the visual suspects.

Yeah, he was also in Midnight in the Garden of Goodnevil. And then he really, like, when everything was coming up to the clothes of his entire career, really, was when he was on the Netflix, the White House show. I did like that show. I can't believe it. House of Cards.

I did like House of Cards. I liked it more for what's her name? Robin. Robin Wright Williams. Robin Wright Williams? No. Robin Williams is not Robin. Robin Wright Penn.

I'm sorry. Robin Wright Penn. Well, she was Penn. Yeah, now she's just Robin Wright again. They got divorced. I think she's still Robin Wright Penn. I think sorry. Robin right pen. Well, she was pen. Yeah, now she's just Robin right again. They got divorced. I think she's still Robin right pen. I think. I don't know.

She's Robin right. Okay. So, whoever she is, you know the chick, the girl from House of Cards. I had Princess Bride. Yeah. She was the Princess Bride. She was so lovely in that movie. I just loved her in that movie.

Right, movie. Yeah, that was like my first like hard-on crush. Yeah. Like I had a crush and then I got a hard on. And then she was in house of cards and she was delicious in that. But I thought the two of them played off each other so well in that show that it made Kevin Spacey's overacting

a little bit more palatable. Another word, she was, you know, she's kind of muted. Her acting is muted. She speaks with small facial movements and looks that she gives people and not quiet to mirror voice of her most of the time. And then he's just acting like a lunatic half the time. So Kevin Spacey, when someone says,

yeah, that guy molested me at a party, doesn't surprise me one fucking bit. It really doesn't. He was grooming grooming people. I mean, in these plays, yeah, I guess like all in Broadway or over in like Shakespeare and the park, there was something about that.

I don't know, but it was really creepy. It was really, the whole thing was creepy. He was like, and he was young men and older men and men men and fine dude, be, be, be whoever you wanna be. I'll just go ahead and come out, but don't also, don't be a pedophile. I know, and then he like never, and this is his right, his absolute right

to not tell anybody what his sexual preference is. You shouldn't have to be your force to be to come out. But he was so, like, he dodged the question in so many ways and then he was so outwardly creepy at all these other places. It's just like, Kevin Spacey to me is just like a real shit head. And then he, and then he goes when everybody cancels him when this whole big deal comes.

He comes out with a series of videos, you know, in that character from a house of cards. He's pretending to play the house of cards. And he's, you know, he's, do you the house of cards and he's you know he's if you remember the video that he put out yet he's like sitting by a fire of the youtube videos like sitting by a fire the real truth will come out no one knows the truth like me you missed a president

and the real truth will come out i don't think he's ever recovering i think he's still being sued i feel like that's the thing in the the news recently i found not guilty uh... forcible mol thought something in the news recently. He was found not guilty of forcible molestation in the UK, but then he got sued again by a different person here in the United States. Yeah, he's out of money and he's never gonna act again. Not in a professional manner.

I heard he was doing like summer stalker, something like summer stalker. Out in the park or some shit, it's like, yeah, Yonkers, New York, because that's where he should be. And Yonkers, New York doing summer stock packing groceries of publics, fucking creepy. Uh, anyway, off my high horse about Kevin Spacy, speaking of creepy and weird hair, which he always did have weird hair, speaking of creepy and weird hair,

falling in the category of Donald Trump, Theresa Caputo and Kevin Spacey is our good friend and a constant foil here at the commercial break. Feels like we're hand in hand at this point. Frankie B. Oh yeah. Hey everybody, it's your favorite part of the show where I pine for more of your attention. First way you can help fill this hole in my soul, go to Apple and leave a suppositive review.

It takes two seconds out of your day and it really does help grow the show. But there's no quid pro quo here. You don't have to give us anything to get something for free. Go to tcbpodcast.com. Hit the contact us button and send us your physical address. We'll send you a 21-EPM sticker directly to your local. You can also go to youtube.com slash the commercial break for fully edited episodes this same day they air here on the audio fee. 855-TCB8383 is where you go to drop us a text message, questions, comments,

concerns, content ideas. We take them all at 1-855-TCB-8383. Add the commercial break on Instagram if you're into that kind of thing, and TCB podcast on TikTok, it's what I hear the kids are doing, it's all the rage. One last thing, if you could, if you will, if you would. Visit our sponsor's websites, buy their products if you're in the market for them, and always use our specialized URLs or codes, when and if you can. They pay our bills and who knows? You may be the reason we have electricity in the studio tomorrow and I thank you ahead as I'm for that kind gesture. Let's listen to those sponsors for a few

minutes and then we'll be back to this episode of the Commercial Break. Hey Podcast Universe, it's Christina, executive producer for the commercial break, and we are so excited to let you know that Rocket Money is sponsoring part of the show. We've all done it, gotten a little wine drunk and started a free trial so you could watch a new show, only to find yourself looking at your bank account a few weeks later, wondering why you have a star subscription. I mean, maybe that's a little specific to me, but I know you've done something similar, but that doesn't even matter anymore because I have rocket

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Get rid of your unwanted subscriptions and take control of your finances today with Rocket Money. That's RocketMoney.com slash TCB. And thanks Rocket Money for being a sponsor of the commercial break. C-B. Frankie B's back is back. And he is posted a video about why you should consider getting a hair transplant. Not that there's anything wrong with him. Drop the follicles! Okay, so we're gonna pluck this hair from your balls and attach it to your head.

I'm not knocking it, look at me. I'm not knocking it. There's nothing wrong with getting a new transplants. I have to say, but Frankie talking about it, that's fun. That's funny. And the fact that he's got this long, wispy hair, like this long, like pubic hair on his head, it's just so funny to me because now he's coming out and admitting that it's hair transplant. And that's fine, like,y hair, like this long, like pubic hair on his head, it's just so funny to me,

because now he's coming out and admitting that it's hair transplant, and that's fine, like, you know, whatever. I know some people who've had these procedures done. I know a woman who's had this done actually, and I know that, like, it's got to be a big blow to the ego to go bald, right? I knew it was happening, so I beat it to the partial long time ago. Yeah, so now everyone's used to seeing me with a bald head. It's not like I show up one day with a bald head. Everyone's seen me this way forever and ever. But I do know that this can be, you know, a real hit to the ego. Yeah.

So let's find out more about it with Frankie B. I was throwing on the internet as I do do. And here's Frankie talking about his experiences with a hair transplant Look at him Now that I know it's a hair transplant, I just can't look away It's like a train wreck waiting that it's got grays though. He does have grays Well, you know pubic hair goes gray too. So wherever they took the hair from yeah, I think that's really taken from Like your chest or your legs or your balls or something.

Somewhere on your body. I don't know. We'll find out more. I'm sure he's gonna share with us. Okay, here's Frankie. Voice, will it 100% absolutely is? Wait, wait, oh no, one second. Sorry about that.

I'm gonna start at the beginning. Is volume a choice? Will it 100% absolutely is? It's your choice. If you choose to live the rest of your life with either bald spots or severely thin in hair, that's your choice. That's your choice unless you have ten and a half thousand dollars per visit that takes 30 visits to get hair transplanted. Frankie, it's not a choice that a lot of people have. They don't have that kind of extra cash sitting around. Call your insurance company, ask them

if they cover the hair transplant unit. I'm gonna transplant a bunch of hair from my nuts to my head. Can you cover that for me? What is my deductive about that? It's also your choice to take the proper steps in correcting your hair loss in today's video. I'm gonna show you what I'm doing right now to correct my thinning hair

But first here's my incredibly obnoxious intro He's lifestyle. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. My name is Frank Minardal. This channel's geared for all guys who want to up their game Look and feel better about themselves and grew me fit in this fashion in lifestyle if you're in lifestyle What did that even mean in lifestyle? I think he's trying to say and lifestyle It is just yeah, it's just bad at words You like the content in this video do me a favor give the video a like and don't forget to subscribe

So you don't miss any of my upcoming videos. Oh, more subscribe, Frankie. I know you know. I know you know. I see you taking stuff from the commercial break and putting it into your videos. I see you. Ball the choice. Well, it absolutely 100% is.

If you want to do something to correct your balding or correct your thinning hair, there are tools out there to do something to correct your baldying or correct your thinning hair. There are tools out there to do that. Or you may choose or a baseball cap the rest of your life. You wear a baseball cap. You may choose to be a loser the rest of your life. Completely up to you. You want to be a sad sack asshole sits on the couch and gets no pussy for the rest of your life.

No problem. However, me, I'm dropping $175,000 to have hair transplanted from a dead goat onto my head. Wait, so we have it, just disclaimer here, we have not watched this video. No, we haven't watched the word of it. We're going to this cold and I will guarantee you that Frankie has something that you can buy

that's related to him. Oh yeah, it's gotta be available at one of these products. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If it's not really, if he doesn't do it at his shop, he sells some kind of shampoo that makes it all. He does, this is not his PSA. Yeah, Frankie Scott all to your motives here. I mean, maybe not, there's some videos where there's not,

he's not selling us something, but I guarantee he is selling us something. He's just ranting, another big picture. At the pool, you were a baseball cap, at the gym. You even wear a baseball cap when you're dressed up nicely to hide your balding hair. Do you think everybody out?

Who's wearing a baseball cap when they're dressed up? To hide their balding hair? Hey, we got to go to this gala. Welcome to Sato La Lossa. May I take your baseball cap? No, no, no, no, we gotta go to this galah. Welcome to Shatto La La, sir. May I take your baseball cap? No, no, no, no, no. I'll be keeping the 1983 Pittsburgh Pirates cap on my head.

Thank you very much. Sir, do not allow Pittsburgh Pirate Baseball caps at Shaila La. Shaila La does not allow baseball caps. Hey, listen. Shayla La is not a love baseball caps. Hey listen, I'm getting a bunch of ball hair transplanted onto the top of my head. It looks a little wispy right now. Can you give a brother a break? So, certainly, write this way to the kid's section.

Yeah, you're at least heard some kind of maybe like Fedora or something. Yeah. You're not. maybe like Fedora or something. Yeah. You're not right. Yeah, Fedora. If you're going to wear a hat, go clap your asshaila long. You're going to be like Jamie Raskin. You know the senator? You know the senator Jamie Raskin, he had cancer,

and he just started wearing like a pirate bandana on the Senate floor. And I'm like, go Jamie. All right, dude, I got you. I'm picking up what you're putting down Air doesn't what you're doing. We all know we see a guy wearing a baseball cap We know he's hiding his balding head Pirates fan. Yeah, or is it or is that a baseball game? How many guys wear baseball caps that have hair?

Every fucking idiot with a master shirt on wears a hat Just sharing that information with you Want to do that for the rest of my life go ahead But if you want to know what I'm doing to correct the process of my thinning here I would like that's what I've been thinking about all night long What is Frankie doing to correct the process of He's thinking what Frankie do what would Frankie do? What would Frankie do? W-W-F-D? Mm-hmm. I can take you from my adventure of exactly what I'm doing to correct the problem. Now you're looking at me going man

He's got a full head of hair and that's what I thought into one day my then he's got a full head man he's got a full head of hair man he got that new head of hair and from Amazon wow that's great it's been even for an hour so I bought pubes online super good into my head I bought pubes online. Super good up to my head. You like my new pubes, it's made of horse cock pubes. It's made of sea lion pubes. You like it?

No? It's a little shiny. It'll go away after a minute. It's got to start to blend into my real hair. Girlfriend, you know, she'll freak you're kind of's a little shiny. It'll go away after a minute. It's got to start to blend into my real hair Girlfriend, you know she'll break your kind of getting a little light up here He's got a girlfriend with this new information. You're kind of getting a little light up Well, I think that might have been a former girlfriend. Yeah, former. He railed on in another episode Yeah, and that really gave him a complex certainly did so now he's like who says that by the way

I would never say hey Jeff you're gonna a light up there. No, that's not what I would say Anyone yeah, I would say hey honey go fix that scroungie. How the hell are you going on? I'm the host of the commercial breaker Can't be seen out with you like that. What are you doing? Yeah, where's that baseball cap? I'm like one of those sororities that Alabama, I have the 3P rule or whatever, or 3M rule, makeup, what is it? I don't know how to put it. Out makeup, I don't know.

You either have to have makeup, clothes, or hair done. You have to have two of the three done before you leave the sorority house. Stupid. I said, what? She goes, you're kind of losing your hair back there. What are you talking about? Well, I kind of went into a heart attack mode because I never took a mirror.

I never looked at the back of my head. I find that hard to believe. I've been eating avocado and egg. That's right. I've been having two necks for all my life. Exactly. I've been working out every day. I've been applying my skin, oils, and getting my face

razered. What do you mean? That's right. Hard attack. I'm putting lommages on my head for years. That's what I wash my hair with. Mom told me, lommages. You'll never lose your hair.

Smells kind of weird, but who cares? Yeah, I believe No, it was going on. He's never it's please. He's at the gym every for five hours a day Of course you can. Yeah, it's not true So as soon as I got home that day grabbed a mirror and look sure as hell I was losing my hair now This could have been going on for years. I had no idea She didn't notice all that hair was on your pillow. Sure as hell. Sure as hell.

Sure as hell. Is hell sure? Are we for sure, hell? We'll get into this, by the way. Well, what is a future episode? But, in that way, let's keep going. Right away, again, I was in heart attack mode. So, I started to get on the internet and looking at different

Oh, oh Oh, frankly, that's a big one. It's the big one my left arm is now. I got a ball spot. I can't feel it Sanford and son what a great show Next out there and see what is gonna help my thinning here Well, the one that everyone pretty much knows about, which is Manacchidil. All right, I'm sorry. I thought Manacchidil was for your boner.

No, it's for your head. Oh, it is? Yeah. Oh, okay, gotta try that. Just Manacchidil, you can get this at Costco, comes in like a six pack for a Costco. Costco. Costco, you're trusting your Harry placement to Costco?

I'm going to end up with Harry Poms. That's really funny. That is funny. It does say Kirkland only way that. That Kirkland brand? The only way that he even knows about that is because he looked for and he got it. Yeah.

He got the six pack. Yeah. He looked for the cheapest price. He got it. Yeah. He bucks or so. And I started using him in accident. I started using him for about two months.

You know, then I'm going, is this stuff really working? Is it going to work or am I just wasting my time in letting my thinning hair progress. So I took the next step and naturally the next step took the next step and I started drinking it. And I ended up with a furry throat. I started shitting out hair balls. I couldn't figure out what's going on. It's going to a hair transplant company. So I scheduled an appointment with a hair transplant company. The one I'm using is called Restore. Now they're famous out here in Chicago.

Their billboards are all over the highway. Chicago. Yeah, because you do see a lot of bald guys in Chicago. I think it has something to do with the weather. I'm just assuming. I hope they can. No, you don't think so? They're on highway. You see their billboards and never in a million years that I expect that I would be giving a phone call to them. So everyone out there who's using billboards, they

work. Okay. So I scheduled why because one guy called and they work. Well, and they do work, Brian. You bought the billboards. I did buy the billboards and it did work and look how successful this show is now. We're still paying off those billboards. Consultation. And upon the arrival of the consultation, the gentleman explained the entire process in detail to me. My biggest fear was, we're going to take your bowl here, we're going to put it on you. You like it? Fear was we're gonna take your bullhead. We're gonna put it on you like it Yeah, I'm gonna buck each bullhead out of your nuts. I'm gonna tape it to you I'm like so it is yeah, they sew it in you know, but the bloody

pubes head yeah, are they gonna have to shave my because that's what I thought they got to shave it all the way down Yeah. Are they gonna have to shave my hair? Because that's what I thought. They got to shave it all the way down to this done. But there's a newer process out there now that allows you to keep your hair as long as you'd like. So that was definitely music to my ears. So again, he went through the entire process.

La di, la di, oh, we like stupati gonna take a nut hair and put it on a toddy. Ha, ha, ha. Hey, music to my ears. I really needed to keep my long hair. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You couldn't let that go. No. And the cost of it. Well, the cost of the process was 14,000. Now a lot of people out there are gonna go. Oh my god, 14,000. But you can spend 14,000 without blinking an eye on him on Harley you can spend 14,000 on vacation How long is girl? Yeah, on a girl that's right? You have to spend 14,000 on an 18 year old chicken to club like that just like that

But I chose to put it do it for leg hair to be transplanted on the my ears Harley because their way more expensive the 14,000 well, yeah But I guess I'm assuming you're staying it down payment But he's also making the assumption that most people out there are 14 extra thousand dollars. Most people out there are buying Harleys or, you know what I'm saying? Like, he's making the assumption this is like some affluent crowd he's talking to. I don't think the average YouTube watcher has $14,000 sitting in their bank account. I've made 300,000 episodes of this show and I still don't have $14,000 in my bank account.

Harleys can last shoot. I've were six years before you get rid of it. The vacation after a week, it's done. You spent the money. So why not invest $14,000? That's gonna give you a full head of hair. So naturally I was all on board with the process. So let me explain. Hi, I'm done. Sign me up. Can you get my head and start for today? Thank you for calling me. Restore. How can I help you? Yeah, I just found out that my girl just told me that I'm losing my hair. How do I get it back? Well, it's 14,000 dollars. Sign me up. I'll be right there. I'm going to return to Monoxidil. It gots go.

It gots go. This work in I apologize if this video gets a little lengthy. But if you want to know step by step, but what you can do, we want to know. Oh, we have to. You want to know step by step of what you can do. We want to know. We have to. In fact, then watch the video. So it started with day one. It's a two day process.

So the first day, two days, I thought this took months, two days. It's a lengthy process. It's two days. Two days. It's a lengthy process. I don't know what to take, Chrissy. It's three hours in total over one day. You go in and they give you a haircut. And what they do is they pull the hair up from the back of my head. Okay. And then they started clipping. Those are the donor hairs. Those are the hairs

that never fall out. Man never lose their hair around this area. So they think the donor hairs, okay, we're taking this way just seriously. The donor hair. You're taking it from your ears, Frankie. Do that process and that's three hours. And know during that process you got to be very still You can't move Know big deal back of your hair like they lift up your hair. He's got longer hair. So they lift up your hair About that long it's not that long, but I could see them like lifting it up a little bit. That took three hours Yeah, of course it did I don't know why probably cuz Frankie was yapping all the time If you got to be very still.

Ow! Yeah. Ow! Ow! My hair! My hair! My donor hair! My hair! My donor hair!

Frankie had a bit of funeral for every donor hair. He just... Yeah. D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D You come to me on the day of my donor haircuts and you want more money. Oh, what can I give you? Okay, sir. If you're done with the dramatics, can we get on with more donor hair? Just one minute. I got to film a YouTube video And then day two becomes the transplant day

One the cut yeah, it's three hours a cut where you have to sit still Such a terrible process Unbelievable what a dip shit two Went back there morning and it started at 6am. In this process, they told me it's going to be a 10 hour process. It's like, oh boy, but again, no big deal. Well, when, why are you complaining?

Then why are you making it sound so miserable if it's no big deal? But, you know, no big deal. The first day was the three hour cut. The three hour cut. That's where you started just to find out $14,000. Yes. Yeah, by the way, just to find out 14,000 dollars. Yes. Yeah, by the way, what is 14,000 dollars for 13 hours worth of work? It's a thousand dollars an hour.

And then you come back in, it's a 10 hour. 10 hours. 10 hours. That's what happens. Okay, listen, I think Astrid spends that every three months, he spends 10 hours. But I think it's just really a one hour haircut, a one hour coloring, and then eight hours of staying away from Brian. That's what I think.

So, what the process is, is you're gonna numb the back of your head. And boy, they put the no vacanant. It was like my head was gonna explode, they put so much in there. Your ears getting numb, it's just a very weird feeling. So then they start,

it's, they fill your head full of no vacanant. ears getting numb. It's just a very weird feeling. So then they start. They fill your head full of novocaine. That's interesting. Novocaine, a derivative of cocaine. So they just fill your head full of it. Yeah. Hey, listen, $14,000. I'm, I don't even want my hair back. I'm just thinking about getting that head full of novocaine. thinking about getting that full of Nova came. Recting each hair follicle one by one and they had a pull 1700 donor hairs so you can see why that process takes a while. So as they're pulling the little donor hairs or labels, I don't want that they cut to about that length, okay? As they start pulling them and they work under magnifying glasses to get

this process done. As they start pulling them and he worked under magnifying glasses to get this process done as they start pulling those hair follicles I'm fixer like a like magnifying glass. Yeah, the eyes are going in. I imagine Rick Moranis Honey, I shrunk your ball hair You don't have I can't see them Honey, I shrunk your ball hair. You're donor hairs. I can't see them. Oh, my God. They pull the follicle itself out. Follicle itself.

They cut the donor hairs. I guess they can identify them. They pull the donor follicle out. They pull the donor follicle. Yeah, and then they remarry the donor hair with the exact donor follicle. And then they drip a little crystal meth out there and they say, go run wild. I'm in a little glass tray and then they hand them over three professionals that are looking at each and every hair follicle under a microscope to make

sure that those follicles are the proper candidate for a transplant. Did this one live? Yeah, no, this one looks dead. It died. This one is screaming. Get the hell out of here. There's three professionals.

Yeah. Not. What kind of professional? I'm imagining 18 year old kids that have the need to work for the summer. There's three professionals. Yeah. Not what kind of, what kind of professional? I'm imagining 18 year old kids that have the need to work for the summer. Yeah. That are tripping on acid.

We're like, oh, cool, dude. Are you a good kid today? Well, yes, I am. Hi, it's me, Frankie Falcals. Hey dude, what happened to my head? It was like a touch to Frankie Sam. They got me a break as a constant blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Look at my body, this!

Get a fritter, it's burnt out! I can't stand it, it drives me crazy. And he's always picking the wrong women! No! Don't squish me! I don't want it, it drives me crazy. And he's always picking the wrong women. No, don't squish me. I don't wanna go back, I don't wanna go back. Pull me out of different head, please. I gotta keep looking. I gotta keep looking.

I think so. I think I'm pretty qualified. I haven't been doing this for a long time. I've been a good hair follicle. I haven't bothered anybody. Occasionally I get in grown, but you know, it happens. So, do I get the job? Yes, no. You gonna call me later? You just gonna keep me in this, so be straight to share for a while or what's going on?

Oh wow, I never saw the front of my face. That's disgusting. What happened there? I thought he was like someone. Yeah, I thought he was Harrison Ford the way he was talking to those chicks. Jesus Christ. No wonder he doesn't ever get played. Hold by the whole process is going. So that took several hours to get all of those donor hairs out. is going. So that took several hours to get all of those donor hairs out. Okay, so then the next step is to naturally transplant it into the thinning area. So now they got a numb that's top of your head. Keep in mind, this is completely numb. Now they do the top of your head. Well, they must have put 75 injections of no vacating there. My head again felt like it was gonna explode Jesus if there's medical staff on On hand

This is sweet Cool man. Whoa, I'm seeing trees. All right, it's just an uncomfortable feeling. And then during the process, if you're feeling something, you gotta tell them and they gotta give it even more. All right, so now the next step is a lot. 75 shots of Nova Cane. Sounds like my last root can help.

Yeah, honestly, they put so much Nova Cane in my mouth. I was numb for a day. But that does sound like a whole lot of novocaine But I imagine there's not like a ton of like connective nerves going on up there So they probably have to numb each little inch I can't like I feel that almost go up when I when I put my finger on it I do but I don't it's I don't feel like if I feel like if I pinch my arm or something like it's a different sensation But maybe that's just because anything from my neck up, it's just not working properly.

They have to put all these little incisions into the area in which they're gonna transplant. So you got 17 hundred little incisions. Yeah, it's a guard. You're planting a guard. Yes, you got to dig the hole. Yeah, that's right. And then plant the seed. Yes, dig a hole. The donor follicle.

Gisenecy covered up with mud. Okay. Yeah. Frankie. You're looking to be weird, man. That they got a knife in your head. And then naturally, after that is done, now they grab all those donor hairs

and individually plant them in the incisions. I don't know how they do that. Then why are you giving us an explanation? If you don't know the actual technical aspect of how it all works, then why are we listening to you? I just wasted seven minutes of my life. I was hopped up on Nova Cane. No, that's true.

He was hopped up on. He would know that. I like. I like. I was hopped up on Nova Cane. No, that's true. He was hopped up on Nova Cane. He would know that. I'm hoping that the Frank follicles didn't make it go on to her. Yeah.

Yeah. I already do the creep thing. Nova, it's not going to be you be me. They find all those little incisions. You know, after they have to come back to it, but they do. So that entire process takes 10 hours and One thing you need to know is while you're doing this, you can't move an inch not an inch Because the way that the doctors described it to me is like if you move because they're working on their magnifying glasses

It's like an earthquake to them. Okay, and you gotta remember they're working on their magnifying glasses. It's like an earthquake to them, okay? And you gotta remember, they're working with tiny follicles, okay, and tiny slip marks that they gotta get that in, so I understand that. Speaking of tiny, have you ever seen your own penis? What's up Frankie? Talking shit, come on, come at me. Come at me Frankie. Sorry, I'm just high on nofiken.

It is, no movement. Now they're gonna give you several breaks during a day. They're giving you a lunch break. Um, but it's lunch break. It's right in the middle. White, small, there's nothing in it. Like a chipotle. Yeah.

I got a theory. I'll fix up that chicken. Hey, check it out. Here we go. I'll fix up that chicken. Hey, check it out. There's another asshole getting his hair follicles done. I don't have the guy to do. Those guys making money hand over fist up there. Gotta get in the hair follicle business.

Very uncomfortable. You think that I can sit there and that move. No, you can't. It's a bitch, okay? I'm gonna tell you, it is a bitch. All right, so after all of the transplanted here was in Naturally, we're done. So again 10 hours. They then they're next I just take a good say naturally naturally Yeah, naturally naturally like any of this is natural first of all second of all

I'm thinking the right approach here is day one. Okay, I can handle day one day two you eat a bunch of gummies And you just go in that really super stoned, and then you just fall asleep, right? Just stay still and fall asleep. I guess you'd have to have one of those neck pillows on though. Yeah, I'm sure they have some kind of device where they're trying to keep your heads down. Yeah, they have something to, you know,

like a torture device. I got a metal cage, they put around your head. Is there gonna explain what you can do and what you can't do after that. And they're very thorough on that. Like you can't wash your hair for a few days. You can't let running water, you know, hit all those follicles when you're in the shower. Like after days, for I believe you're allowed to shampoo your hair, but there's no scrubbing you got a lightly lightly Massage the shampoo in that area and then you got lightly

Frankie you're really letting us in on some secrets here buddy. I'm imagining you in the shower Trying to figure out what lightly massage your head means Bring a cup with you in the shower, fill the cup, and then get the shampoo out. And then you gotta be careful when you're drying your hair. You know, the process is worth it, okay? You're gonna have like two weeks of that uncomfortable situation.

So, you know what's an uncomfortable situation? Listening to you describe your hair plant, hair transplant. They also told me about the side effects. Um, it's going to be a big side effects side effects side effects. Yeah, side effects. Well, you just had 75 shots of Nova game. Well, that's true.

I would think one of the side effects is not sleeping for three or four days. They told me and Holy cow, I wanted to scratch my skull. I mean, it was, it was out of control. It's so bad. And another side effect that they told me about, they warned me about, is that they said you could lose a lot more of your hair in the area that they're transplanting. Why I asked, well, because...

Why I asked? Because you just put 75 shot of no vacated there. And also 75 cuts. Yeah, 75 slices. Yeah, hundreds of slicing skin on your hand. Yeah, you're going to lose some follicles. Yeah, as they're disturbing all the good here, that's still there. You know, they're working in that area.

They're doing incisions. So they've disturbed those other here follicles that are in their growing. So what happens? They fall out. And did it happen to me? Absolutely. No! Not the good one.

That's my only good hair. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I don't know what I've got on that. My hair and my spot that I'm getting thin back there, it's like four to five times worse than what I got in. I don't know if you can see it or not, I'm sure you can, but you can see in this area back here. Oh yeah, no shit, he's got a big bald spot

that's been covered up by his long, those luscious locks. No. There, that it's light. Well, right now I'm doing my best job, you know, to cover that and it put like a little spray up there because the process, because I'm totally vain.

I know. You're just where I had Frankie. You do what you said you're not going to do. Take three months before you even start growing hair. The follicles that they planted in your skull, they're all gonna fall out. All right, then they're gonna regenerate. And again, that process is three months.

And then they said it's gonna take anywhere between six to nine months before you start seeing results. So yeah, Jesus Christ, eight years later than you actually get your hair back. It sounds like a scam to me. Alright, we'll cut that one just a little bit short. I'm sure the very end of it is just him saying the normal thing at the subscribe and like button. But I mean, honestly, a year later you start getting your hair back after the statue of limitations runs out on you suing the place. I love it, I love it. Well, let's think about this for a second because in the beginning, he was talking about how he did the monocidal.

And he goes, I mean, it, it, it, two months. It two months. It two months, I was ready. It didn't work. Yeah. Maybe he could have just spent $50 a month on that monocidal and he would have had hair in a couple of months. But he gave up when he didn't see instant results.

And yet he went through torture for 13 hours, paid $1000 an hour to have his hair transplanted. All those poor follicles and the petri dishes that didn't make the cut. Then you lose more of your hair, but don't worry. Next time you go... One year for sure. Don't worry, by your next high school reunion, you're gonna have at least three more strands of hair. Oh my god, I love it.

I love you, Frankie. You're the gift that keeps on giving. All right, dcbpodcast.com. That's where you go. You'll find out more information about Chrissy and I. You can read all the show notes, watch all the video, listen to all the audio, entire catalogs right there. You can also get your 21 EPM sticker.

21 ejaculations per month, guys. That's what you need to do to reduce your chances of getting prostate cancer. Get your balls checked, girls get your tautausine, your yaya's check. We're just trying to keep you happy and healthy out there. That's all it is. That's all we want. I just have my PSA done. Yeah. Yeah. I'll let you know. I'll report back on what's happening. So go to the contact us button. Give us your address. We'll send you the 21 EPM sticker. If you want us to sign it or whatever we. We'll send you the 21 EPM sticker. If you want us to sign it or whatever, we'll do that.

I think we might need a new sticker and that is what would... Would Frankie do. Yeah. Well, we're almost out of those. We're almost out of those. We might need to get out of those. We'll get the next one. We're also going to put some t-shirts together.

All that merch stuff coming toward the end of the summer. If you're interested in that, we'll have it available for you. 855-TCB-8383-Toll-Free from anywhere of the summer. If you're interested in that, we'll have it available for you. 855-TCB-8383 toll free from anywhere in the world. Questions, comments, concerns, content ideas. 1-855-TCB-8383 at the Commercial Break on Instagram, tcbpodcast on TikTok and youtube.com. Slash the commercial break fully edited episodes the exact same day they air here on the audio feed. You're gonna it Morgan does a great job thanks to Christina our editor editor Marianne our content producer and everybody else astered Jeff everybody else who helps out with the commercial break all right Chris yeah I

think that's all I can do today but I will tell you that I love you I love you and best of you best of you out there on the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I do say we must say and we always say goodbye!I'm still the sameI'm still the same I'm still the same I'm still the same you