The Commercial Break - Gas Station Girl
Episode Date: June 17, 2020The Bits: Tina, Tan and Tweeze is now re-open! The Show: Award winning voice artist and youtube star Rachel Mcgrath stops by to discuss life, love and the pursuit of fame. Don't forget to rate and su...bscribe so you never miss an episode! Text us or leave us a voicemail at +1-661-BEST2YO (+1-661-237-8296) LINKS: Get a FREE TCB limited edition collectible sticker Follow us on Instagram Subscribe and watch the show on Youtube Join us live on Fireside New episodes every Tuesday & Friday everywhere you listen to podcasts! For advertising contact AdvertiseCast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Tina Tan and Tweez is now reopened.
After much ado about apparently nothing, we're happy to announce that Tina Tan and Tweez
is back open to the general public.
That's right, we here at Triple T are back in business and better than ever, so get those
pasty marble bags off the couch and come get some fresh rake.
We're talking to you.
Tired of looking in the mirror and seeing a ghost?
TTT has two state-of-the-art tanning beds to suit all skin tones and types.
With our advance 1982 burning bulb systems, you'll walk away feeling red and ready to take
on those selfies with confidence.
You need more Facebook likes.
Forget those modern UV filter beds other salons offer.
With our special microwave technology, you'll get that painful dark rose-colored glow you've
always been looking for.
Prove the red.
Special event?
Coronavirus party?
Your NASCAR race coming up?
Prove the red.
Come on in and peel off that first layer of epidermis to achieve maximum stop-sign
hue.
Prom night right around the corner?
If you're 15 to 18, don't forget to ask for the little chicken special.
You'll get a 37 minute turn in one of our two currently operating tan vans.
Parked right on the corner of Lola Avenue and Fairburn Street, these vans are illegal
in 49 states.
But due to Tina's special relationship with the men of City Council, we are happy to bring
back this early 80s tanning process.
LADYS have some extra pine straw in your flower beds?
Fear not, our tweezings specialists are here to save your day or night.
You're gonna get late.
With over two weeks of experience, our pubes technicians will remove unwanted hair from
your naughty bits one by one.
The redder the Bed
Our tweez facilities are state of the art with government approved sterilization after each guest.
We only use the best pine-sol cleaning products before, during and after each tweez.
Smells like Christmas!
You'll know you're getting the cleanest tweez available with that unmistakable smell and tinnatannin tweez special burn after each plump.
Beelding burn.
Hey guys, don't be shy, it's 2020.
We are happy to offer a full range of man potato and happy whole waxing.
Chill out and relax in our mancaver, drink some beer, watch some ESPN, and get your sacks nice and slick.
Still case mood, sad.
We are conveniently located in the center of town behind Chicken Palace on the first floor
of Dr. D's Pediatry Clinic.
We have a coveted two star rating on Google, our open 24 hours a day except for Tuesdays
and take appointments by phone.
Ring ring.
Having an upcoming birthday, anniversary, or wedding and need a place to host your event?
Tina Tan and Tuy's now offers a full service event facility in the back of the Tweezing Room, as well as food catered by Tina's mom, Vera Lee.
She's out of jail!
Pick from five different entrees, like Squirrel Pie, raccoon couscous,
and Vera's locally famous Seven Meat Lasagna.
Who wants seconds?
And don't forget, each event comes with Krabapple's finest DJ,
Funky Fresh Friend. Fresh is a deal. And don't forget, each event comes with Krab Apples finest DJ, funky fresh Fred.
He'll be spinning all your favorite hits from the 70s, 80s, and more 80s.
Hit the dance floor and let loose while Fred spins the soundtrack of the night.
Winger, air supply, warrant, and all your favorite couple skate songs will be available on Fred's iPod.
Rock and roll, Pruchiku.
You'll have a party for the ages at Tina, Tan, and Tweez.
Tina, Tan, and Tweez is legally obligated to disclose we are not allowed to serve food on premises.
All catering will be provided inside of Dr. D's podiatry examination room.
Due to health department restrictions, all food must be served in a brown paper bag.
Tina, Tan, and Tweez is obligated to announce that we no longer offer the one-hand van massage package. We are happy to announce, however, that all massage therapists have been
returned to their country of origin unharmed. We have no idea where they aim for.
So come on down to Tina Tan and Tweetz for the grand reopening. Tina, Tan and Tweetz,
we groom you with these exactly where you please.
In early 2020, the world shut down, stores, restaurants, schools, and whole communities
shut their doors in an effort to protect human life. As the world quickly changed, one man went on Facebook to get a degree in Internet epidemiology.
Brian, along with his lab assistant, hopefully, are curing coronavirus by commenting on fake
news and reposting recipes of secret virus cures from a friend of a friend who works high
up in government. Join Brian and Holi as they discuss the world
and life doing this forced interruption,
learning, laughing and loving in this real-life commercial break.
On this episode of the Commercial Break.
Honestly, this is as far as my commitment goes outside of my marriage.
I'm not gonna lie to you.
I was like, oh, Brian Green's got a podcast.
I'm gonna have to go listen and say it's good,
even though it's fucking sucks.
Oh, shit, this asshole.
I thought he was gonna call the police.
My microphone, he was offended by my microphone.
He's like, I don't know what,
I don't know what law they're breaking,
but it's gotta be one of them.
The next episode of the commercial break starts now.
I can barely handle one of them and I don't know what I'm gonna do with two of them.
It's a game changer.
It is a game changer, everyone says so.
So welcome back, it's episode number 10.
I cannot fucking believe we've made it to 10.
I didn't think two.
Ah!
Honestly, this is as far as my commitment goes
outside of my marriage.
This is the most commitment I've ever had
to anything outside of my marriage,
and I'm really proud of myself.
I just feel like I should give myself a pat on the back
because usually I just kind of putts out
after a couple of weeks.
I'm like, yeah, it's not interesting.
But this has turned out to be really fun
and I'm glad that we've stuck with it for 10 episodes.
We might not be here at 20, but I'm glad that we're here at 10.
So thank you very much, Chrissy Holi, for sticking with me.
And when you have people listening all around the world, it's a little bit exciting.
And so I want to say hello to a couple different countries who have been listening a lot over
the last week.
Germany, all the sudden people are listening in Germany, don't fucking know why.
I have to be honest, I have no idea why
these people are listening from these countries.
I don't know where they're getting this information.
We run a little ad on a place called overcast.fm,
but I can't, I don't think that that trap,
the like the international traffic is coming from there.
Maybe it is, or people are just stumbling upon it.
I also want to say hello to my friends in the UK because we have a lot of listeners in the UK. I also want to say hello to my friends in the UK, because we have a lot of listeners in
the UK.
And I want to say hello to one particular special friend in Estonia.
Part of it's beautiful.
I looked up pictures on Google and it is fucking gorgeous.
It's absolutely gorgeous.
TCPpodcast.com is where you go to listen all the episodes, read show notes, and find out
more about us, drop us an email, and we may respond down the road. I'll explain. People are emailing us and dropping notes in the
website, but I'm going to save it for, we'll do that in one show. We'll call through the bullshit,
and then we'll just do one show full of emails from people who are listening, and don't think
that I'm going to softball it, Chrissy. We're going to hold our feet to the fire and there are people
that like us, and then there are people that can go fuck themselves
basically. So we'll take emails from both kinds. Please subscribe so you don't miss any
episodes and leave a review. It's like a podcast hug. Two more house cleaning items. I'm going
to get a phone line. So if you go to our website to the contact us page and you'd like
to be on air and you have something interesting to talk about. Not just, I don't want to talk about the podcast, if you have
like an outside topic to discuss. Leave us a note, with your phone number, we'll tell you
when we're recording and we'll invite you to call in and be on air. Also, go to that
same contact us page. If you leave us your email address, we're going to start doing a
newsletter monthly in late July, as well as like behind the show stuff and show notes
and all this other stuff.
We're going to give anybody who joins that list for the next short period of time, 30,
maybe 60 days.
We're going to give them a free hour of content, hopefully.
We're going to throw out an extra hour of content just to our listeners in Estonia.
Well, I was going to mention that I think there's an apartment complex on the street called
Estonia.
Yeah, I don't, it's, no, a problem. Maybe that's where they're coming from.
Are the rents cheap there is the question.
Rents are falling. Okay, so before we bring on our guest, I gotta ask a question. I want to know
if you feel this same energy that's going around the city or maybe the country out on it.
People are fucking mean right now. People are fucking rude.
They have a chip on their shoulder.
It feels to me like people are really edgy.
And I'll explain a couple incidents
that happened in one drive just the other day.
I'm driving down the street.
It's a two lane street.
It's my street.
I live on it.
It's two lane street.
There's a yellow double line.
It's my street.
I live on it.
And I'm about a 10th of a mile away
and I can start to see that her car
is halfway in the middle of the road.
And so I give a little love tap, you know,
not the fuck you kind of horn, but just a,
bam, bam, like, you know, wake up,
we're about to be in a bad accident
as I'm slowing down because they see
how just how far off she is.
She then corrects herself.
The lady is probably 107 fucking years old and
she literally sticks her hand out the window and flicks me off. And I'm like, you got
to be fucking kidding me lady. You're 107 years old and you're flicking me off and you're
the one in the middle of the road. So I was like, okay, they'll just chalk it up. It's
a tough time and it's coronavirus and I'm just going to chalk it up to maybe this lady is just having a bad day.
Get to the stoplight down the street, my street, it's a four-way stoplight.
And so my street.
And so the cars are, you know, we're stopped at the stoplight,
me and the people on the opposite road, on the opposite side.
And then people are driving, you know, parallel to us.
And as soon as that light turns red,
an additional six cars go.
As if there was no stop light whatsoever.
As if rules had just been thrown out the door,
six additional cars went after the red light.
And I'm like usually in Atlanta,
yellow means go faster, essentially here in Atlanta.
So I can get you get away with one or two,
but six additional cars just taking a left, right in front
of me as my light was green.
And the last guy who went right in front of me,
I was kind of like looking at the guy,
he was staring me down.
Like if we had been outside the car, he would have clocked me.
As if I was doing something wrong
because he hadn't paid attention to any of the current laws that are in place here in the city on my fucking street.
Wow, you're straight.
But let me give you the worst of this.
This happens in one drive, hopefully.
We're driving in a neighborhood, my neighborhood, and there's a speed hump, and as I'm going
over the speed hump, now since I have children, I've taken my foot off the pedal quite a bit.
I'm just kind of- You're catching it there.
Kind of slowing it down to catch it there. No, I don't want to bottom out my car. I slow down to go
over the speed bump and there's a guy come in the opposite direction and he slows down. And as we're
getting to the speed bump at the exact same time, he stops and puts his hand out his half drawn
window in a stopping motion. And I stop, of course I do. Some things wrong. You know, I got a small child hanging out
the side of my car. I don't know what the fuck's wrong, right?
Toilet paper on my tire. I don't know. And so as I stop, the
guys like, the guy goes, slow down your fucking asshole.
And I was like, I'm going 10 fucking miles per hour. And this is
what this is, this is exactly smells fucking miles per hour. And this is what, this is this exact response.
10 miles per hour too much.
And I'm like, exactly, okay, Newton,
do you know how the laws of motion work?
I'm not gonna get over the speed hump
if I don't keep continuing to go, what is wrong with people?
I think that the current environment that we're in,
I really do think there's gonna be a lot of good
that comes of this, but I think right now,
things are fucking tense
Everyone is tense. Everyone is a chip on their fucking shoulder and it land is usually not like this
I mean, there's a lot of road rage in the land, but we're not usually screaming and yelling at each other over simple instances of bullshit
Are you feeling this or is this just me?
Yeah, no, I think everybody's on edge right now
It's it's I've noticed it too, you know
I don't think anybody really knows how to act and what's right and there's a sense of control that's been lost and
you know
I
Don't have my own street. So I haven't I
Gone I'm lucky enough to have my own street this podcast has been so successful
I've been buying streets in Atlanta for the last ten weeks Keep it coming. I'm in that to have my own street. This podcast has been so successful. I've been buying streets in Atlanta
for the last 10 weeks.
Keep it coming.
I'm in that Joe Rogan money now.
I just want to say, can we all be good people?
I think the way that we really get over a lot of this stuff
is if we just start being better humans to each other.
We're not off to a great start of my drive
to, you know, six fucking miles was any indication.
I'm, it really put me off.
It really made me, it made me on edge.
It gave me a chip on the shoulder about the people with the chip on the shoulder, all I got to say.
We have a guest with us today in our electronic studio because we are still staying away from each
other. Rachel McGrath, along with being an incredible friend of Christian Eyes for many years,
is an extremely well-regarded voice-over artist.
She is the voice of Moses, Southwest Grill,
hundreds of radio stations all around the world,
and that includes why 100 Miami Big Fucking Deal,
US 99 in Chicago, Big Fucking Deal,
Star 94 in Atlanta, it's kind of a big deal.
You can hear, what's that?
She's gonna do buy.
She's gonna do buy. that she's in Dubai. Yeah, we're not in Dubai. So
She's what she's doing us one up on as far as that's concerned you hear her in the aisles of Walmart
You hear her when you're flipping through serious. I have heard her in gas station bathrooms in South fucking Georgia where no one else lives
I swear to God. I welcome my good friend Rachel McGrath to the podcast Rachel.
How are you?
I've got to tell you I never thought I would end up in a story about being in a gas station
bathroom.
That's a secular way.
That's not true.
You know your name is scrawled all across Bath of South Georgia bathrooms everywhere.
I feel like maybe all across the world, maybe even in Dubai.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Here she is on the eve of her releasing her brand new C Rachel Cook.
So now you can see her.
She's a beautiful woman as well as being my friend.
She's a beautiful woman.
Gorgeous.
She's hilarious.
I have had an opportunity to take a look at a few
of the early episodes that I are they released yet Rachel are you have you released the you
to. By the time by the time this comes out the first episode will be out so carbon
Nara carbon. The getty Ella carbonara is my first one. Yeah. And that'll already be out.
And everyone thinks the getty carbonara is just this difficult, impossible dish.
And really, it's quite simple.
You just can't scramble the eggs.
That's it.
That's it.
To me, complicated pasta is mac and cheese
and that's no bullshit.
But I watched your video and you did
honestly make it seem simple,
but that's not what I like about the video.
Cause let's be real.
I'm not the one cooking around here.
What I liked about the video and what's interesting
is that you engage people with stories about your life.
You're really pretty irreverent like us.
I think the attitude of the two shows is similar,
maybe you're a little bit more calm,
but and the food is good to look at,
and you're good to look at.
It's a win-win as far as I'm concerned.
It's fantastic.
Thank you, and that's how I felt about your podcast.
This show, when it first came out, there's actually, there's a mock, a mock PSA in Australia.
And there's all of these actors.
So they're like, please, please, whatever you do, whatever you do, do not start a podcast.
That is how prevalent people who shouldn't have podcasts are,
who are now at podcasts. I'm like, just friends popping up
from everywhere and they're like, I'm a radio host now.
I'm like, no, you're not.
Yeah.
We didn't see that PSA.
Yeah, we have to see that one with that.
Yeah, well, but when your podcast came out, Yeah, we have to see that. We have to see that.
Yeah, well, but when your podcast came out,
I'm not gonna lie to you.
I was like, oh, Brian Green's got a podcast.
Oh, shit, this asshole.
This is good, even though it even though it's fucking sucks.
So I get, I start doing my hair and makeup for my show.
And I press play on the podcast.
And from the minute you started speaking, you were amazing.
I was like, oh my God, so that PSA doesn't apply to you too.
Well, listen, I thank you.
I have to say of all the compliments that we could have,
of all the people who have complimented the show
and of all the listeners who have sent in positive feedback.
I think I speak for Christy when I say this. Yours holds a lot of weight because you have been doing this for
a whole shitload of time and bite this. I mean, in the voice industry, in the radio industry,
I mean, I know you're not podcasts are something you probably haven't been too attached to, but
we're so excited to have you on the show. And when you complimented the podcast, listen, I think if you knew,
if you thought the show was bad,
you'd probably actually tell me,
hey Brian, the show is shitty.
She's straight up.
She's straight right, right?
Rachel straight up.
She's straight up.
After a couple of vodkas.
Well, that's like every time we sneeze, you know.
I know.
I'm drinking one right now.
Oh, hey, cheers.
Oh.
The model talk.
What are they saying in Estonia?
Yeah.
I'm going to find out what cheers is.
Not a little bit.
Yes, a new thing.
What language do they speak for?
Don't have any fucking clue.
They're so close to Russia.
Maybe they, maybe it's some kind of Russian.
I don't know.
Maybe it's Polish because they're near Poland.
I'm not really particularly sure, but I'll find out that information.
I'm going to find out how to say cheers in Estonian.
I guess it's called Estonian.
It will just call it Estonian for now.
Let me ask you a question.
You're a beautiful woman,
carusing the streets of Atlanta in 2020.
And I know that the quarantine has put quite a damper on your...
It has.
Yeah, your corralling activity.
Let me ask you, is it difficult pre pre-virus?
Is it difficult to be a pretty girl in a pretty single woman in Atlanta in 2020? Because let me
let me give you an angle on this. I've been not single for a long time. It's almost been six years
now that I've not been single. But when I was single, it was fun,
but be honest, it was kind of miserable.
And now it's 2020, it's six years later
and with technology and the apps and all this other stuff.
Is it fun or is it just kind of fucking miserable?
I think in this case, being pretty is,
and that's you calling me, you know.
And you know, you know you're good looking.
Okay, fine, but you're beautiful. I'm saying that. Well, thank you, I, you know. You know, you're good looking. Okay fine, but beautiful.
I'm saying that.
Well thank you, I love you.
But I would say if we're being honest,
when you're attractive
and you get on tender or you get on hinge
or you get on bumble,
it is like a feeding frenzy.
It's like the boys have gone to the market.
You know what I mean?
I mean, it is just me.
I mean, for me, if you are an attractive woman or man and you're not taking a
advantage of these dating apps, you're missing out because even though I have
this cool job on voiceover artist, I've worked at home
in a little whisper room all day long.
Yeah, that's true.
So I'm not getting out and meeting people,
but in my phone, lie, all of the wrong men,
just jobless.
And shut your own, I just can't get enough of them.
I love it.
I just love it.
There's a lot of creepy mother fuckers out there
But I get the sense that you kind of likes the creep like you need to have a little bit of creep
You want to like a little bit of creep and going on
When you get on bumble or Tinder or you know mumble or whatever the fuck these apps are
Whisper feel like
No whisper is the new ASMR.
Ah, whisper.
whisper.
It's gonna make a great noise.
I like whispering angel wine.
I'm gonna eat it snickers while I take a shit.
It's whisperant.
It's whisperant.
It's whisper.
It's whisperant.
It's spaghetti carbonara. I'm a spaghetti carpen, Nara.
I'm gonna puke popcorn.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
It's so fucked up.
Ah!
When you get on whisper, whatever these,
whatever any of these amps,
these amps are,
Mumble, whisper, whatever it is.
Ah!
What is the,
because when I was,
I was on an app once, right?
And it just went horribly awry, went on three dates,
you know, had to, went on three dates.
Almost got a restraining order on the first girl.
It got kicked out of a bar with the second girl
and the third girl, no shit, ended up in a tree,
not too far from Chrissy of this house.
And the fire department had to come and get her out. It's amazing.
It's not a lie.
Without the smog and cigarette the next thing I know she's climbing a tree, she's hammered
and she can't get out.
Did you go on a date with a woman or a cat?
She went to high school with me too and she was the weirdest thing.
She was a couple grades older than I was.
And I mean, we just hit it off.
I thought we hit it off.
And then all of a sudden, she ended up in the street.
She hated you so much that she climbed a tree
to get away from your ass.
And to get out of that date,
I felt like I was just like,
lose her, new girl, Uno, as I'm standing there.
And the police officer is like,
is this your girlfriend?
Like I not yet.
It's met on mumble.
Yeah, we just met on whisper.
No, mumble is the best.
I'm now calling every dating attender hinge, whatever it is, is mumble.
It's mumble, yeah.
Yeah, they're all.
No, I've had some amazing dates.
I've also had dates where I was at this restaurant called Tour of Enlicks and I ended up, it was like a movie. I just pushed my chair back, it
screeched and I was like, I screamed, fuck you! Across the table and it's
dormed out. And then I got, there was another Tinder date where the guy was
45 minutes late and we ended up calling each other fat and he ended up touching
my arms saying that they jiggled. I ended up grabbing his belly saying it was a
beer belly and you call each other fat and it was all advertising on the thing
because we hated each other that much so you know I can be quite
my question here's my question
I did you fuck him
did you have a secret? I didn't know.
I was expecting it.
Now I will say there's an element to a lot of men.
If they seem like they can kill me, I kind of get turned on.
Yeah, I did.
But this one was just mean with no danger.
Wow.
He was just being an asshole.
He was just being, I need, you know, the charisma
and the smell's like danger.
And then I'm like, ooh.
Yeah, you and I talked about this before.
There is this, you gotta have the stink.
You gotta have the stink.
Like, if you meet someone, if they don't have the stink
and by stink, I mean that pheromone that connects
that it's not really a smell, it's just a thing
that happens and you get close enough to them
and you're like, holy shit, I'm attracted.
It happened like, Astrid and I, we had like, you know,
five and a half, no, we had five and a half weeks of communication before we ever met each other.
And my biggest fear walking into that room that night when I met her face to face for the
first time was she wasn't going to have that stink.
And you and I were actually at a bar the night before that happened.
And we were talking about this, Rachel and we were saying, yeah, and you were like, what
happens if the stink ate there?
And I'm like, she goes back to Venezuela I don't know luckily she
had the stank and there you go do you do you get the best way she's got
the best day ever dated she does she wrangled this board so that's for sure
we met we met
Brian's wife and we and Chrissy and I
looked at each other and we just we
just wanted to grab on for dear life.
We knew that this woman was never
going to eat salsa out of a jar and
say she was that not that any of
Brian's last girlfriends ever ate
salsa out of a jar. But you know, That not that any of Brian's last girlfriends ever ate
salsa out of a jar and get there full, but you know.
She eats a cheeseburger.
It's a cheeseburger woman.
When you get a lot of unsolicited dick picks on these applications,
I have some that I could pull up.
There was one.
We actually made a date, you know,
and we were gonna go out and whatever.
And I knew this guy wasn't my forever guy
because I just was playing.
And I'm working on a forever guy,
but it's so fun to play with them,
especially the younger ones.
Oh, they're so fun.
So I was, you know, I was going to meet him at a bar
and before we were gonna meet at the bar,
just all of a sudden, just all of a sudden,
just to all of a sudden, like we're not in a conversation, I think my phone goes off, and there's his penis.
Wait.
I'll see you in five minutes.
I was gonna say, just so you know what you're looking for when you meet him.
You're not sure.
Is this dick or an enter the room first?
It was.
Maybe the most... Okay, get this. It was so mammoth and gargantuan.
No, that I canceled the date.
You got scared he ran you off with his dick pick.
Yes, he he needed a booth.
Wow, yeah, he needed an extra chair for that dick.
I think I.
I'm not attracted to the porn style. No, I think that's for porn only.
It looked like it was gonna send me to the hospital.
Really?
I didn't say what did you say to get out of it.
This is what I said.
I said I'm very sorry and I don't mean to dig on your confidence or you know
to your cock
you are your cock
you are your cock
you look very nice from one out
that's what I said I go I'm sure there's women
that would be in a line for it
I go but this particular one is just not up for that kind of a challenge
you told them the truth
you said hey listen I don't go that deep.
No, I don't.
This ain't baseball.
Yeah, this ain't baseball.
I'm not looking for the furthest home run.
I just need to get an infield double.
I know.
Even a ground rule.
Ground rule double.
The beef fire.
As far as I'm concerned, it's a bunch of the picture, but you know.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Oh god, yeah.
But if anything else, mumble is really amazing for stories.
I mean, because your friends, especially your married friends,
or your friends who are in a relationship for a long time,
they wanna know what's going on.
That's why I'm curious about this,
and that's why right off the bat,
I just have to ask, because for me,
there's not, I don't miss being single.
That's not what I miss.
I actually quite frankly like the settled nature
of where I'm at right now,
because I had a lot of unsettled years
where I just did whatever the fuck I wanted to do.
And I have to say the least.
That's saying the least.
And we know there's lots more episodes to come,
so we don't need to get into all of it here,
but I think of a single attractive woman in 2020,
and I think of Rachel.
I think of what is Rachel up to,
like how is she handling this?
Because when I've been,
I was single for a good part of my adult life
and really wilding out never once,
not once that I ever send an unsolicited dick pick.
Never once.
I just never did it.
Quite frankly, I don't even think I sent a lot of dick picks
at all.
And so I'm like, who are these guys?
Who really, they get enough balls in them,
or they're enough booze in them, or red bull, or whatever they're fuck they're doing.
And they think it's open. Red bull gives you dick pics.
Wings is so 2000. Yeah, wings is so 2000. It's dick pics. All rules are out the window.
The ladies flicking me off and you get dick pics
with your red bowl.
So I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question.
I'm gonna ask you a question. I'm gonna ask you a question. I'm gonna ask you a question. I'm gonna ask you a question. I'm gonna ask you a question. in the neighborhood that I lived in when I was like 12 years old, we took care of some six and seven year old boys.
And just for their parents went out to dinner,
we just basically sat in the house, right?
But I, like I probably shouldn't have got curious
and started looking through one of the closets
in the kitchen, like a pantry closet.
And what I was looking for was something to eat.
What I found was a three and a half foot black mamba, dildo, a penis
pump, a bag of weed and two pornos. That was a Saturday night. So I took some weed and
one of the pornos. You didn't take the penis, but I was never asked back to babysit for the shot again.
However, no one ever asked for their weed or their pono back, because I think that would
have been an embarrassing conversation with your neighbor.
That's a true fucking story, by the way.
Do people recognize your voice when they first meet you?
Have you ever had that instance because you're so
I and the story about the bathroom. I literally was driving down to
Amelia Island where we visit often and we're in South Georgia really in the middle of fucking nowhere
You can take some back roads that it's just cornfields and that's it and every once in a blue moon
You'll write up on a gas station that doesn't even have a credit card swipe right outside
You know which kind I'm talking about. Yeah, oh yeah.
With the banjo.
Yeah, just 66.
Yeah, and they have cardboard doors for the bathrooms.
I mean, it's just like the flimsy as nasty
as crazy as place you've ever been.
But we were there on an afternoon
and I texted Rachel right after this happened.
They had some, I don't know which radio station it was,
but it was preaching going on.
There was straight up preaching going on.
And I mean, the crazy kind of preaching, right?
Fire and brimstone, yelling and screaming.
I know, and then there was a commercial.
I preached, I testify.
There was a commercial break, and it was like,
you're listening to Randy Rhodes, preacher hour on,
prayer for, for South Georgia.
And I was like, that's fucking Rachel.
Rachel, are you on four, four, four South Jordan?
She's like, you know what, I probably am.
Well, check cashes.
Hey, listen, I'm,
people paid me a dime here.
I'd start telling kiddie stories
and just putting children to sleep.
I swear to God, I would.
Do you?
Putting children to sleep?
Not the same child that you, baby, said.
No, not the same child.
He's way grown.
He's probably already taken his parents' penis apart.
Hi, I'm Brian Green.
And welcome to the Sleepy Hour podcast.
Let me ask you, I'm curious about this,
because you're everywhere, Walmart, serious,
many, many radio stations.
Do you ever go on a date,
or do you ever have a party somewhere,
and someone says, I recognize your voice,
or you sound familiar, I think I've heard you,
or is that something that does it?
Absolutely, all the time.
All the time.
Yeah, and mostly it's from Star 94 here in Atlanta,
or if you go to another city,
and I'm on a station there, you say that station,
and they're like, oh my God, I listen to that station,
all the time I knew you sounded familiar,
I knew you sounded familiar, it's all the time.
And it really is cool.
You know, I feel like if I start going to the point
where I don't think it's cool,
it's time to pick a different profession.
Yeah, for sure.
Because this is beyond my wildest dreams, you know.
It just gives you a little trick.
It's really hard.
Yeah, thank you.
I did very, very, very hard.
Thank you, Chrissy.
You were, just like I worked that when it was clear channel
together back in the day.
And Chrissy was this a polyal met.
Yeah, oh yeah, that's right.
And Chrissy was this Yeah, oh, yeah, that's right and Chrissy was an account executive and my friend forest called her cheerleader, but
So
Whenever Chrissy would come in my studio for us would be like oh cheerleader blood here the cheerleader but leave
Because Chrissy used to be a cheerleader and she's got this big old booty, you know
Min's words for us.
He wasn't.
I know.
You have worked hard to get where you are at.
Where did you grow up in Chicago, right?
In the south suburbs of Chicago and I'll play a song with a homeward.
Yeah, I was in the street from each other.
Yeah, right down the street from each other.
When did you, and I don't think I've ever asked this question of you, was radio, work,
or this type of work
something you always knew you wanted to do,
or is this something that came later on in light?
Did you fall into it?
I'm curious.
I always knew I was gonna be on TV.
And then I went to the Illinois Center for Broadcasting
after I kind of cleaned up my act.
Just a little bit.
I think that, although when I was going to school, I bartended and on more than one occasion I woke up on the pool table.
I was like, oh my god.
It's a soft foul.
Yes, it was soft foul.
I was fully clothed but apparently I got tired and I was wasted and I just went to sleep on the pool table.
I feel like that's happened three times while we've known each other.
Yeah.
I put you to bed at your own birthday party at 9.45.
The party started at 9.15.
I then hosted the party and cleaned it.
I can't deny it.
Can't deny it.
It's okay.
We have all been there.
You went to high school.
Were you popular?
Were you a late bloomer, were you?
When I went to high school, I had,
so we're gonna take it in a serious tone,
just to help anyone who had a bad childhood.
I was a nerd, I was a Maryland Manson freak,
and I was picked on relentlessly.
However, the one thing I had going for me is that
in school, I didn't have to try, and I got straight A's. Oh, that helps. Yeah, the one thing I had going for me is that in school I didn't have to try and I got straight A's.
Oh, that helps. Yeah, so even though I was picked on, I was in all honors and I just never studied and I just was good at school.
Thank goodness. So I like the teachers and stuff, but I didn't have a good, you know, coming up.
So when I went to the Illinois Center for Rock I was saying I thought okay well I'm gonna be on TV But this was before smartphones and this was before cameras everywhere. So I had never seen my own face on camera and
When I saw it
This is when you're young you're just so mean to yourself. Of course I thought I
You're just so mean to yourself. Of course.
I thought I hated the Hollywood.
You were like, I can't do this for a living.
Yep, so I switched over to radio.
I was like, I'll be on the radio.
I'll just be famous radio person.
Yeah, exactly.
And then I just got into radio.
And then all of these years, I'm like, I gotta be on TV.
I gotta do TV stuff.
Like, I need to be on TV.
And it's funny when I was young, I was on this show called
The Jenny Jones Show, do you know what I'm called?
I remember this, of course I do. Show. Do you know how to do that?
I remember this.
Of course I did.
Of course I do.
My mom wants that.
The religious play.
I think I've heard this story, but please do so.
Yeah.
So I was on this thing called the hot bod squad.
Which is...
I'm getting a link to this and putting it on the website.
Yeah.
And I've looked for the emphasis.
I cannot find it, but I had my Marilyn Manson.
I have no idea who I booked or who I convinced to book me on the show, but I can visit.
They paid me and everything.
So I was on their like six or seven times.
I'm 19.
I'm so excited that I get a free hotel room, a limo ride to the, you know, to the studios.
I was so excited.
And the cameraman looked at me and he said,
not now, but Sunday.
I'm going to fuck you.
No!
He said, Sunday, you're going to be on TV and you're going to be famous.
And I was like, oh, he goes to a company.
That's a vote of confidence.
Yeah, he goes to trust me. I've seen a lot of people and that always stuck with me.
I was like, okay, I gotta be on TV, I gotta be on TV.
So this cooking show for me is everything.
It's the way, it's really the way in 2020 that you get on,
I mean, television is no longer television, right?
So either you're gonna be on prestige television,
like Netflix or Amazon or TMC or one of the channels
that's going to, but I feel like movie actors are now filling those roles
and those prestige television shows.
So really for our generation,
podcasting is like radio and YouTube is like television
and I say our generation, I mean,
the time that we're living in now
and I think it's a great idea
and I do think you're in natural
in both voice work
and in front of the camera from what I've seen,
because I don't know, there is a bubbliness to you,
but it is very real.
It's sincere.
It's not obnoxious.
And it comes through on the camera.
And so I think you're really going to do well with the show.
Plus you have like, what, like, 6,000 Instagram followers
are always like.
No. It's so funny. like, I post something on Instagram,
and this is the, you know, this is what social media does.
I'm like, oh, it only got 200 likes.
And then on Facebook, you know, it's like 6,700,
and I'm like, what is wrong?
With me, I am measuring the content of my character,
the success of my life by likes.
Like, I have to sometimes pull it back and be like,
okay, this is not real.
And Chrissy says it.
She's like, yeah, I went on Facebook
and then I was looking at my ex boyfriend
and his new girlfriend and their daughter
and their dog's wife's and sister's brother.
And it was just, but the point is,
that I just, the point is that I just got on there to look up somebody's birthday
I was like is today their birthday. I think it might be Jennings birthday
I don't know and I get on there and half an hour later. I'm down some rabbit. You get down the rabbit hole
I
Stay off. It's the problem I think with social media is that all of us are guilty of measuring in some small way or large way,
our self-worth, either in competition with someone else
who we see on Facebook and we only see
the extraordinarily wonderful highlights of their life,
not all of the low moments, but the highlights,
they're in creed on a boat.
They're not posting that thing.
Of course, and I don't post bad things either.
I don't say, hey, depressed today,
or I found others
I don't know
People who say hey depressed today
Worst Brian those are the worst kinds of people the people who post oh my god. No my the people who post, oh my God, no, the people who check into the hospital
and you get the-
Oh my God.
No, it's the one.
Explanation.
I'm like, you know what, fuck you.
You checked into the hospital and you didn't, I'm not going to ask you why.
And I can't even do other, I cannot do that.
Do not check into the hospital, I don't give it now.
But here's the problem, and I have one guy on my Facebook specifically
who will literally threaten to commit suicide
every three weeks and then the very next morning.
He's like, I got a new job, things are going great for me.
And if you say to him, like if he's like,
I'm on the bridge about to jump and you're like,
hey dude, call the suicide hotline.
Have you ever had to pay a cell phone bill before?
Do you know how expensive it is to make those kind of phone calls? He will deny any kind of help that
you offer him because all he wants is he wants people to react to get sympathy. So part
of me is pissed because I'm like, why are you fucking doing this? You really, I mean,
you're really making me angry, pretending to be so desperate and really what you are is
desperate for attention.
But then the other part of me says it's 2020
and this is what's happening to society,
is that if we're not getting attention
through these social media platforms,
some people are cut off completely
from real human interaction,
whether because they're weird,
they're socially anxious,
they're ugly ducklings, yeah, they're weird.
And this guy is strange,
but I feel for him in some small way,
and I'm always trying to help,
but there's a small part of me that's kind of smartassie
about it too, you know, I'm like,
I'm like, he's like, I'm gonna jump off the bridge
and I'm like, you know, did you wear a wet suit?
It's cold.
And of course, of course, we want to help people
who are having those terrible thoughts.
But of course, it's a very serious matter
to put something like, I'm at the hospital
or I'm on a bridge.
Like, you can't be doing that shit.
Like, if I'm having those thoughts,
I'm certainly not gonna post a Facebook right before
I get right to jump on the bridge.
God, I dated a woman.
Honestly, I dated a woman who would do that
via text message every 15 seconds.
And then you'd be like, what's wrong?
Everything okay, I'm on my way,
and they'd just stop overreacting.
And I'd be like, what the, what the,
what, you just told me in your committing suicide,
you'd stop overreacting, I'd end up at her front door
and knock it on the door,
and she'd be like, you can wake up my roommate.
I'm gonna wake up your roommate,
you're gonna be dead in 15 minutes,
we just texted me that you're jumping out of the window,
and you're pissed about me waking up your roommate. Don't be like that.
But then there's, again, there's a part of me that feels for this because I know that some people that's the own,
it's like a lifeline for them. That kind of attention gives them a heartbeat, right?
And those kind of people, it's a set situation.
A professional help.
That they're in.
Absolutely.
And there's nothing wrong with seeking the support. I'm not about mental health in this country is just insane.
If you need help, go get help.
I have a therapist.
Yep.
I do too.
I think everybody does or should.
At the point.
My therapist, or should, or should, or should, my therapist and my practice of meditation
has been the single thing that has kept my head squarely on my shoulders,
even when it was almost rolling off. Like, and if it wasn't for those two things, and a therapist
is not a doctor who tells you you're crazy, it's a person that you go and have a conversation with,
an independent auditor of situations in your life. And oftentimes, the answers are right there
inside your own head. A good therapist just gets you to the point, right? That's all they do is just get you to the point.
Stop worrying about this small bullshit
or put this in perspective.
And so I feel for these people on Facebook,
but there's help out there in in 2020.
There's really no excuse for not going to get it.
So instead of spending so much time, energy, and effort
on posting your, which hospital you're in,
why don't you just walk into a therapist's office
and pay that bill instead?
So let me ask you a question, Rachel.
You go to this broadcasting school,
when do you start getting some success in the radio?
How do you get into the voice over business?
Some people may not even understand
what a voice over artist is.
Yeah, actually most people.
One truth is fine.
Yeah, why don't you explain a little bit what your job?
I worked on the radio. I worked on the radio. I moved all around the country. I was on air. I was a
jock, but I worked at this radio station. You were a jock? First, I was a jock. Oh, I had no idea.
Yeah, and then I was a program director. And I was in rock radio. And I moved to West Virginia to
become a program director. And they told me that, you know, I was gonna be able to give
all this.
Nothing like West Virginia.
I was, oh my God, I cried every night for four months
and it was just...
What is that? A top 500 radio station?
I was so young, I was like, okay, I'll be there.
And like, I was so poor that I couldn't even afford
Totino's pizza.
I had to get the broker even afford Totino's pizza. I had to get the program of Totino's pizza because I didn't have any money.
But you know what?
It was, it really, really makes me appreciate everything I have now.
Absolutely.
So I moved around the country all over and I finally landed at Atlanta and I would tell
anyone who would listen, hey, I want to be a voice girl.
Hey, I want to be a voice girl. Hey, I want to be a voice girl.
And I was an owing, and I was brash,
and I just was full of gumption and youth.
And it worked, and I would work for free.
People would need a project like,
let's say a 30-second commercial,
maybe a...
Did all of my commercials for the first time?
Yes, all of my commercials.
I would sell.
Yeah, and I would, I was a producer too.
I still, I still am a producer, it's like riding a bike.
And I would make demos, remake demos, remake demos.
I worked so hard until finally I got signed with my agency Atlas Talent.
And then so to speak, I blew up because then you have eight years of representation.
And all of my radio stations,
they put food on my table and I love them madly,
but it is a ton of work.
I work from 830 to 6 every single day more.
You're always on call if you have an emergency.
Oh yeah, if something goes wrong in the country,
then all those radio stations need some tag
or they need some line reds
so that they can put it, that can interject it into their time block.
So Rachel is the girl that you hear coming in and out of songs and in commercials and
like it's called imaging, right?
That's what they call it.
And in so many radio stations, how do you handle hundreds of radio stations?
Like, are you literally just sitting in front of that microphone all day long going page by page by page?
Yes, that is exactly what I'm like even today. I wanted lunch and it's so funny. Like
I got some carbonara. I know. I was like lunch for me is like my sacred 15 minutes and
this is I shouldn't be admitting this to you, but my guilty pleasure during lunch was always
The young and the rest no the bowl
It was 15 minutes because I DVR did and so I didn't want you to cut out the commercial
Yeah, yes, what it was so then now that the apocalypse is happening they haven't filmed so now I have no
Now that the apocalypse is happening, they haven't filmed. So now I have no thing to look forward to during lunch.
So now I just, the food is like my thing.
So today I was like, I was so busy.
I was like, I don't have time for lunch,
but I made time.
And I made this roasted beet salad with asparagus
and more low flavored cheese.
I didn't even know there was more low flavored cheese.
And hearts of fire.
Wow, it's good.
Yeah, and then I drizzled some honey mustard, but it's not like the yellow one.
It's not the hidden bellicine. Yeah, it's not the hidden bellicine. It's like
actually well like rainy mustard with honey and a little bit of shallots and I
drizzled that over there. And so that's my reprieved during the day. But when the
stations send me stuff,
which they do all day long,
I just do it in the order of which it came in.
And sometimes if I'm on a roll,
like let's say that I have like two stations
that play pop music.
And they're waiting.
I'm in that pop mood.
I'm gonna do those two.
You know, I'm not gonna do that.
I do all the pop stuff because that's the voice
that you're in.
Yeah, exactly. I'm not gonna do all of the pop stuff because that's the voice that you're in. Yeah, exactly.
I'm not gonna do like an AC station,
which is adult contemporary,
you know, in the middle of the pop.
Cause one I'm like,
wait, and the other one I'm more family friendly.
So I have something to say, Rachel,
and do you remember this?
I know that you do.
So we were on our way to Chattanooga one time,
and you really are always on call.
Yes, I really, I really am because you brought a portable microphone on our trip.
It's a two-hour trip up to Chattanooga from Atlanta.
And I will never forget that we're in a gas station, speaking of gas stations.
Yeah.
This was not South Georgia. This was North Georgia. We're in a
Gas station. We're getting gas and Rachel's like I got to do this spot real quick
How do you do a spot in a radius? I mean in a gas station in your car
Your story.
Yeah, because in the closed environment, that is netting the beyond.
You're not a fucking emergency room doctor.
I don't know what I'm talking.
So this man, he was pumping gas at the pump next to us.
Looks at us like we're committing a crime.
He is like what is happening.
Rachel's got her head behind the seat.
She's like she's stuck in a dick head.
It was so awesome.
We got a knockout of these commercials real quick.
This is what Rachel does.
I think she's always on call.
She's always working.
And I love her.
I love her for that.
We still laugh about the guy that looked good.
We do. She made me cry. Yes. I thought he was I love her for that. We still laugh about the guy that looked like we were coming in the crime.
Yes, I thought he was going to call the boys on my microphone.
He was offended by my microphone.
He's like, I don't know what they're... I don't know what law they're breaking, but it's got to be one of them.
Something. They're up to something.
Sheriff Mosley, this is Bob over at Bob's, Sighten Shine.
We got two young ladies with their heads behind the steed one of them looks like she's sucking a penis
We may have a penis pump with them too. I'm not particularly sure what those look like
Well, what would what did they what was the first?
What's the first, what was the first radio? The first radio gig, what did they pay you?
What did you get paid to be on air in West Virginia?
Do you remember?
$18,500 a year.
You can't live on 18, that's what, this is back in the 90s?
Well, no, it was like 2005.
Okay, 2005, it was like 2005.
Okay, 2005, you certainly can't live on 18,000.
The use to think about radio.
That's not the croaker brand pizza.
I know, I just, yes, I would,
I would count my money and then like go into the croaker
because of course I didn't have a bank account
so I had all accounts.
Like nobody was gonna give me a bank account.
I never bank account the last year.
Yeah.
I would count it and then I would text my friend in Chicago and be like, okay, I have $28.5
and I have to eat the whole week.
And I would have everything planned like what I was going to get.
And honestly, I think everyone should have to do that for a year because they can build
the grid.
A grid.
Character.
After that, you were a stronger person.
Well, I was an executive at Clear Channel.
I got paid about the same amount of money.
It's like, you know, cheap bastards.
When, so when you're on this particular radio station,
here's, I think I want to make a point.
When you imagine that you're going to go into TV
or into movies or something like that,
there's a lot of prestige that comes with being Imagine that you're going to go into TV or into movies or something like that.
There's a lot of prestige that comes with being on television, most television, and most
movies if you're an actress, right?
The thing about radio that always got me, it's always been my favorite medium.
Audio has always been my favorite medium.
Whether that be music or podcasts or radio or whatever it is, it's what attracted me to
go work at Clear Channel also.
But when I got there, I realized just how fucking
shitty the talent at radio stations is treated. I mean, absolutely like dirt. These guys and
girls are on the radio for five, six, sometimes seven hours a day, multiple stations. Even
the big name stars who do the morning shows that are syndicated when they were out of our
building, they got treated like absolute horseshit.
Now a few have deserved it, but others of them didn't deserve it, and there was no pampering whatsoever.
If you think that some, like the guys that you listen to or the girls you listen to in the morning, besides Ryan Seacrest,
are sitting in some gold-plated studio somewhere being pampered and having coffee and donuts handed to them,
you got it all wrong. Radio is a down and dirty scrubby dubby business
where people are fucking cutthroat
and talent gets paid nothing
no matter how hard they work.
It doesn't really matter to make it in radio,
especially in 2020, is super fucking hard.
And it's one of the reasons why I got really turned off by it.
I was like, I'm starting so late in life.
I will never make it in this business. Not to mention you can can't say anything you want to say and you can't do anything
you want to do. You are an incredible success story because you have made your own path
in the radio business. And now you're making a comparatively speaking, a shit ton of
fucking loot to sit there and voice these stations and you have the time or you making
the time to also
father your dream to be on quote unquote television.
That's YouTube.
That's television.
You know that half the television, I have to screen time I have right now that I watch
with it, especially with a child, is on YouTube.
I just watch shows on YouTube.
That's all I do.
I go around and I dick around on YouTube.
And so I'm super excited that this show is coming out. It's called Sea Rachel Cook. It's premiering on YouTube. And so I'm super excited that that this show is coming out. It's called Sea
Rachel Cook. It's premiering on YouTube today, the day that this episode is released, which
is what? The 17th?
Yeah. Well, it'll be, it'll be on on the 16th, but it'll be by the time this show comes
out, it'll be on. And my handle is Sea Rachel Cook. I'm on YouTube, I'm on Instagram, I'm
on Facebook and I'm on TikTok.
TikTok, are you gonna give out your bumble?
Are you gonna give out your mumble or your whisper?
Mumbles next if I reach the big time, I'll be on mumble.
Hahaha.
Hahaha.
Rachel, so I feel like 49 minutes is just not even like
scratching the surface of what we can talk about
So what I'd like to do is I'd like to have you on this month so back in
June to share more information and just like let's just wrap and have fun. Is that okay with you?
That would be great. Just see you guys makes me so happy
You know, yeah, it's just like we're just shooting the shit.
Like maybe next time I'll be drunk or something like that.
Hey listen, we don't care.
And you know, if you're too drunk, we just edit you out or mute you.
So don't worry, I'll make you sound good.
T.C.
Rains on that to me and William time.
There's been a couple to listen.
I, you have never been that drunk, but there's been a couple of mutes.
I've done a couple of mutes because I'm like,
yeah, Chrissy probably doesn't want to hear that back.
It's not for my sake, it's for years.
A couple times it was quite funny and I was like,
she's going to regret that she said that.
T-SVE me podcast.com is where you go to find out all the show notes.
You can listen to all the episodes, remember to go to the contact form,
drop your email address if you want to be on the monthly newsletter.
And it's possible that, and let me give you an example of what we might share on that
monthly newsletter or share with that monthly newsletter, is additional conversation with
people like Rachel McGrath, extra bits that we don't err or we have yet aired.
And maybe just like an episode where Chrissy and I just get on and then randomly on a Tuesday
or Wednesday afternoon, we might send that to you.
So go to TCPpodcast.com, leave us your email address,
make sure you send in your questions, your comments,
or your reviews, subscribe, leave a review
on your favorite podcast platform.
It's like a podcast hug, Rachel.
I love you, thank you for joining us.
I love you, thank you so much for having me.
I love you, Rachel.
I love you.
I love you.
I'm Brian, I love you. We'll talk to you next week on the commercial break. I love you. I'm Brian. I love you.
We'll talk to you next week on the commercial break.
Okay, bye.
Email us at thecommercialbeat at gmail.com.
Find us and follow us on Facebook and Instagram at the commercial break.
New episodes drop every Wednesday.
We can be found on Spotify, iHeart Media, Apple, Google and all major podcast providers.
The commercial break is a great middleweight production.
Written and produced by Brian Grig.
Co-hosted by Chrissy Hodley. You